#It was the point I officially had to break from Fandom because I just couldn't take itttt

[antifictionsfiction]

Worth the Free Admission - Part 6/8

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / AO3

Fandom: Children’s Theater Critic with Alfred Molina

Pairing: Arthur H. Cartwright x gn!reader

Rating: T

Chapter summary: A late night phone call with Arthur opens up a new path for your relationship while bringing new doubts to the surface.

Warnings/tags: age difference, insecurity, slow burn, personal growth, dialogue heavy

Chapter word count: 2166

A/N: I've been extending this story more and more because I just couldn't fit Cartwright's redemption arc in only 5 chapters, sorry. 8 chapters will hopefully be the final number, and I hope you'll enjoy this shorter but important addition to the story as well as the final two chapters coming soon!

I never had an official tag list, but if you’d like to be tagged in the new chapters, drop a comment under this post 😊

Recycling a gif from my dear @scorsesedepalmafan. Thank you so much for beta reading and always supporting me 💙

Also a big thank you to @overlookedfile and @sgt-petter for your kind comments on AO3 <3

@francis-ford-kofola I spontaneously posted this before I had a chance to share it with you, I hope you enjoy! ✨

You had promised Arthur you would give him time to arrange his thoughts and you were going to honor it. When you had made the promise though, you clearly hadn’t prepared yourself for how excruciating it would feel, the lead up to Arthur arriving at the conclusion that he was ready to talk at last. 

It had been more than two weeks now, which also meant two weeks until the performance. On top of that, the end of the school year was approaching too, and you found yourself caught in a never ending string of meetings with your colleagues and your students’ parents, and working your ass off to ensure that every child in your classroom would get a fair chance at improving their grades. With so much on your plate your mind should’ve been occupied enough not to leave much space for Arthur to take up in there. But the reality couldn't have been more different: despite everything on your to-do list, every day seemed to drag. Without getting any hints that Arthur was ready for anything, you felt like the two weeks had been stretched to a full month or more. 

Sure, he wouldn’t push you away when you’d touch his arm or sit closer to him than you’d dared before, your conversations flowed just as naturally as prior to the kiss, and you even went out for dinner after one rehearsal. But no matter how comfortable you were with each other, the sheepish avoidance was still there, hiding in plain sight, right behind Arthur’s gaze that had gotten warmer, softer. You had caught him looking at you with the strangest expression in his face a few times, his eyes wide and his lips slightly parted, as if he wanted to ask you something. Ask, no plead with you to take the burden of the decision off his shoulders. You both knew that would be a dead-end though. You had done all that you could, taken risks and bared your emotions, and now it was inevitably his turn. 

You were sitting on the couch by the window of your cramped but cozy living room, revising a pile (that was fortunately getting smaller) of short essays on the topic of “inspiration”. It was a Friday evening and you technically didn’t need to keep working, but you were desperate to enjoy a weekend that was truly free and relaxing, and so you had made a deal with yourself to finish all your additional work in time to keep it off your mind for the following two days. 

You let out a laugh as you read one of the kids’ description of how inspired she was by sharks because they were a misunderstood species that still kept fighting. She has a point, you thought, finding the unique take refreshing. Putting the stack of papers aside to take a brief break, you reached for a sturdy mug of spicy chai and took a long sip. It was just warm enough to comfort you, but not too hot. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, attempting to expel all the anxiety-inducing thoughts from your mind, if only for a few seconds. 

Your little moment of meditation was soon disturbed by the vibration of your phone, the sudden buzzing startling you and completely undoing whatever progress you had just made in terms of calming yourself down. You were ready to ignore the call unless it was something completely necessary, but as you were about to silence the device, you noticed the caller’s name on the screen. Arthur. 

“Hello?” he breathed out along with your name as soon as you picked up, sounding both relieved and questioning. 

“Hey Arthur, did you need anything? Something to do with the costumes?” you asked, straight to the point since you knew how these evening calls usually went. There was a pause on the other end, before Arthur cleared his throat and promptly apologized for it. 

“No, no,” another pause, perhaps even longer than the previous one, “I just wanted to talk to you,” he said, and then as if he was afraid of your reaction, quickly added: “If it’s not a bad time. I wouldn’t want to disturb your Friday night.”

“I was still working, I really don’t mind being disturbed right now, believe me.” You gripped your mug tighter, trying to steady your heart rate that was now racing with anxious anticipation. 

“You should rest. Give me more things to do if you need to. The last thing I want is to see you constantly overworked.” The apparent worry and care in his tone was spreading warmth through your entire being far more than the spicy chai ever could. 

“I appreciate it, but I’m almost done, thank God. I’ve decided to take the weekend off, you know? So I’ll be all recharged, you’ll barely recognize me next week,” you joked, knowing all too well that one weekend wouldn’t even begin to replenish the energy deficit you were currently battling. Arthur let out a soft laugh.

“That’s good.” Another silent moment simmered between the two of you. You thought you could hear Arthur taking some deep breaths, but then you ruled the sound as some white noise amplified by the silence. Then, an actual, unmistakable draw of breath finally cut through the void between the two ends of the line.

“I want to apologize.” 

“Apologize for what, Arthur?”

“For keeping you waiting. I know not saying anything… it hurt you, I could see it, but I felt too awkward, too- too embarrassed with myself to address it. How immature of me, I know.” You could tell the words weren’t coming easily to him, but he pushed through.

“What you did, I couldn’t believe it. I kept trying to rationalize it as some kind of a mistake, a lapse of judgment. I needed some time to think, but then I began to worry, what if my silence made you lose interest? A part of me even wished you had lost it. Maybe you have, maybe I’m just making a fool of myself right now, but I-” 

You could almost see him fidgeting with his glasses, posture stiff and eyes wide. 

“How do you feel about Noël Coward?”

The sudden change in tone and topic caught you off guard, leaving you with no space to reply to his apology, or his doubts. 

“Uh, the playwright?”

“Yes! You know your 20th century theatre,” his tone audibly brightened as he slipped back into a familiar topic. You weren’t about to let him lose the thread though.

“Arthur, what is this about? Can we go back to-”

He promptly cut you off, his words rushing out as though if he didn’t speak now, he never would. Maybe that truly was the case. 

“A marvellous production of one of his plays has just opened in New York City, off-Broadway; would you like to come see it with me tomorrow?” he asked and then, immediately added: “Unless you’re too tired of course. Or you’ve changed your mind. Or-”

Now it was your turn to interrupt him. You swore  if you had to hear one more sentence influenced by his crippling insecurity, you were going to lose it. There was no way in heaven or hell you were going to let him call off the date before you even had the chance to enthusiastically agree to it. 

“Arthur,” you said loud enough to effectively shut him up, your teacher voice coming out just a little bit. You quickly checked yourself, realizing that particular tone could send Arthur even deeper into the pit of insecurity and intimidation he was currently trying to scramble out of. 

“Arthur,” you repeated, softer this time, “I’ve been waiting weeks for you to tell me if you want to give this a shot or not. Do you really think I’d bail now that I know for sure I’m not the only one who wants this?”

“No, you don’t strike me as someone who would.” 

“I’m not. I really, really like you, Arthur. And I’d love to go to see a play with you tomorrow,” you smiled, wishing you were talking to him face to face so that you could see him flush and fiddle with his glasses. 

“I really like you too,” he said with an unsteady exhale, “Too much in fact. You’ve made me remember things about myself that I haven’t been allowing myself to appreciate for years. And how out of touch I’ve been. I’m not young anymore and it hurts to break out of all the lies you’ve learned to accept about yourself when you’ve been living with them for too long. That’s why I couldn’t just… jump into things head first. I still have a lot to relearn about myself, but I think- I believe I’m ready to give this a try now. Thank you for waiting for me.” 

“I’m glad I’ve waited long enough to see the real Arthur. To see past Arthur H. Cartwright, the children’s theatre critic, I mean.”

Arthur laughed. It was refreshing to hear him relax a bit even in a situation that was clearly difficult for him. 

“Yes, I’m afraid you might’ve helped put the Cartwright brand out of business.” 

“Oh come on, you can still review theatre without ruining kids’ self esteem.”

“You’re right of course, I haven’t been nearly as harsh in most of my latest reviews,” he paused, thinking, “But the more I’ve reflected on it, the more I’ve been feeling like I’ve exhausted this particular career path.”

“Really?” You understood his reasoning, not wanting to rely on his infamous reputation and instead exploring things he’d wanted to do since he was young. However, you were surprised by how fast he has come to the realization that there still could be so much more for him out there, even at his age. Once again, you felt proud of him. He was right, he still had a long way to go, but the amount of self-reflection that had to go into the decision to leave a stable, somewhat prestigious career after decades, wasn’t something to take for granted. 

“I’m afraid so. But I didn’t call you to discuss my existential crisis with you, not when you probably still have dozens of essays to read through.” There it was again, the self consciousness, or guilt in his voice, as if he was embarrassed for having talked about himself for what he perceived as too long. 

“I do, but I feel like this conversation was more important than possibly having to sacrifice a few hours of sleep to finish my work,” you said, the corners of your lips lifting slightly in a reassuring smile that you hoped he could at least hear through the phone. 

“I suppose you’re right, even if I hate the thought of you losing sleep, especially right before a trip to New York. I’ll drive of course.”

“I appreciate that, Arthur.” The thought of him worrying about your sleep schedule warmed your heart, it had been too long since anyone gave your well-being a priority. 

“Of course. Shall I pick you up at two in the afternoon?” 

“Can you make it twelve? I still owe you a lunch from last week, remember?” 

“Oh? Well, how could I say no to that?”

After you said your goodnights, you indeed ended up losing sleep. Not over your work, which you were done with in under a couple hours, but due to the rush of adrenaline that the prospect of an actual, confirmed date with Arthur. 

Just hours from now you were going to face him knowing he wants you too; not just that, that he wants you enough to fight his way through a jungle of tangled up doubts and fears. Just months ago you would have felt embarrassed to even imagine being seen in public with the Drama teacher’s worst nightmare. Now, you were still a little terrified of potentially running into someone who hadn’t had the most agreeable experience with Arthur, yes. But you knew you would hold his hand proudly and defend the man he had become, as long as he was willing to hold himself accountable for his shortcomings in front of someone who wasn’t you. After all, this relationship was never going to feel straightforward and easy, but if you were one to go for ‘easy’, you would’ve never invited him to your rehearsals in the first place. And something was telling you, if this was ever going to work out, it would be with a man who was able and willing to dismantle his entire life philosophy after someone had confronted his defence mechanisms. 

You had always been bold in that way, but so was he, as it seemed. If he was able to keep it up instead of retracting back into his shell, only time would tell. But you weren’t about to just stop believing in him like he had stopped believing in himself a long time ago.

[captainsophiestark]

The Right Choice

Jack Thompson x Reader

Masterlist - Join My Taglist!

Requested by @everyhazyday! Hope you like it, and thanks for the request!

Fandom: Marvel

Summary: Jack recently pissed off a reporter by spewing the same lies Vernon Masters was selling. But a lot can change in a few weeks.

Word Count: 3,297

Category: Angst, little bit of Fluff

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

I huffed a sigh through the phone's reciever, keeping it pressed between my ear and shoulder as I scribbled away on my notepad. I'd almost broken the lead from pressing so hard—I needed to calm down.

"Are you sure?" I asked for the third time, putting extra emphasis on the words this time. One of my contacts, who'd never before steered me wrong, had officially found something I wasn't ready to believe.

"I'm sure," he replied. "Come on, have I ever led you astray before?"

I sighed again. "No, you haven't. It's just... I did an interview with this guy, like, a week ago. He just spewed a bunch of unbelievable lies and stuck to the same handful of lines no matter what I asked him. I'm finding it difficult to believe he had a change of heart."

"Maybe he was putting on an act the whole time. Undercover work or something."

I snorted. "I know that wasn't it."

"Well, fine. Take the information or don't. But I'm telling you, based on everything I'm hearing, he's gonna be one of your best shots at information to take this whole thing widely public."

"...Thanks for the tip."

We said our goodbyes, and I hung up. Normally, I would've been out the door almost as soon as my source had given me the address. I'd been chasing leads on this story for weeks now, and any break could make a huge difference. But this wasn't normal.

Last week, after getting wind of some corrupt dealings between very powerful people, I'd managed to track down Chief Jack Thompson of the SSR, who was believed to be at least tangentally connected to the group. Anyone I suspected of actually being in the group had managed to avoid me at every turn, but I'd tracked Thompson down to a fundraising event and cornered him for an impromptu interview. He'd been incredibly evasive, had brushed off everything I'd brought to his attention, and before I could really press him, Vernon Masters, a higherup with the war department, had swooped in to chase me off. Not a day later, the newspapers had been running stories exactly fitting the clues I'd seen pointing towards a cover up, which Thompson had so strongly denied.

I was furious. I'd already been planning to expose whatever underhanded business might have been happening, but after that night, I was determined to get concrete evidence and bring the whole damn thing down. I'd been working for the past few weeks to chase every possible lead, assemble every shred of evidence, and I was finally getting close to something airtight I could print. When one of my best sources called me with a tip for an interview to really seal the deal, I'd been ecstatic.

And then he'd said the name: Chief Jack Thompson with the SSR.

My plan until about ten minutes ago had been to never speak to that asshole again, until maybe we exchanged a few heated words when I was covering the downfall of this little group of corrupt men in power, him included. But supposedly, he'd not only had a change of heart; he'd had a change of heart so massive that he'd been key in taking down several of the group's most powerful members.

I sighed through my nose and scowled, but then a moment later, pushed myself upright and headed for the door. I was a reporter, dammit, and a good one. Whatever was going on with this guy, it was directly related to something absolutely huge. I couldn't just ignore it because I wanted to.

My source had pointed me to a dive bar in LA, which seemed an unusual place to find the Chief of the New York SSR. But, lo and behold, when I walked through the door I found him sitting alone at a table in the back corner, looking exhausted and absolutely miserable.

I took a deep breath, squaring my shoulders and gripping my tape recorder a little tighter. I walked over with my head held high, but Thompson didn't even glance up from the drink he was nursing until I came to a stop right next to him.

His eyes scanned me, and when they got to my face, his expression soured. I started talking before he could tell me to get lost.

"I have some questions to ask you," I said, taking the seat next to Thompson without asking. If I'd asked, it would've given him an opportunity to say no.

To my surprise, Thompson just grunted. He didn't look at me, instead staring at the wall ahead as he sipped his drink. No doubt, something was different than the last time I'd seen him. The slick composure and arrogant posturing were gone, and he still hadn't said a word. He looked much rougher than the last time I'd seen him, with dark bags under his eyes, a crooked tie, and messy, limp hair. Something significant had clearly changed. Maybe my source had been right after all.

I cleared my throat, changing my posture and mentally changing my approach.

"So..." I started, rapidly trying to rework my opening questions to be a little less aggressive. "I heard you played a pretty big part in taking down some very bad people recently."

He snorted into his drink.

"And you believed it?"

"Not at first, no. But looking at you right now... I'm kind of starting to." Thompson glanced at me for the first time since I'd sat down, surprise and suspicion warring on his face. "My source has never led me astray before. Figured it was worth following up on. The minute I walked in here... I don't know, call it a reporter's instinct, but you seem different than the last time we talked."

He huffed a humorless laugh, leaning back in his chair and looking me over again.

"Great, so you believe I did my job as Chief of the SSR. That doesn't explain why you're here. What do you want?"

"I want an interview," I said. "I've been trying to take down this little corrupt power cabal for weeks now, and I'm finally getting close to having enough evidence to break a major story. An interview with the chief of the New York SSR might just put me over the line."

"What, are you hoping I'll run a list for you of everybody the SSR caught and everybody else we're keeping an eye on?"

"I mean, that'd be great."

"And what makes you think I want to help you?"

I shrugged. "If you're sitting and drinking alone in a bar because you put everything on the line to take down that corrupt group of assholes... I feel like our purposes are suddenly aligned."

He took a long, heavy sip of his drink, then sat forward again to look at me.

"I'm not really in the mood for an interview right now, sweetheart."

I leaned forward too, getting up close and personal with Thompson. I met his eyes and let my posture and tone make my point.

"Look, I get that you're having a rough night or whatever. But unless you feel confident that you got every last person even a little bit involved with this group, they're still out there. And they're going to keep pulling strings and causing problems until somebody stops them."

"So what do you want me to tell you?" he demanded, breaking in. "Classified information? I can't share that-"

"Fine, so just give me something. I work for one of the only papers in the city that's not going to kill this story before it gets a chance to get off the ground. If nothing else, you should realize how much this helps you."

"Helps me? Giving a reporter a story about the decision that might've destoryed just about everything in my life is going to help me? Dammit, I should never have entertained this. Just get lost."

"Destroyed- What are you talking about?" I demanded, my own spark of anger igniting to meet his. "Doing the right thing has destroyed your life? Holy shit, I knew I shouldn't have come down here. I knew you were part of that group-"

"I am not a part of that group."

"Well then by all means, explain to me how taking them down could have possibly destroyed things for you! You did something good and helped protect our world, and you're in here drowning your sorrows and regret! I bet it was your only play, huh? The group was on the brink of going down and taking you with them, so you cut your losses and betrayed every single one of them to save your own skin-"

Thompson shot out of his seat with so much force that the chair tipped over and landed hard on the floor. He didn't even bother to finish his drink as he stormed out of the bar. I scowled, then grabbed my tape recorder and quickly followed after him.

By the time I managed to catch up, he'd already taken a left turn down an alley to the side of the bar. I sprinted after him, and when he heard my footsteps, he sped up. Still, I managed to catch him. I grabbed his arm, but barely managed to get out a "Hey-" before he whirled around, a fierce scowl on his face.

"Why won't you just get lost? You're not getting your stupid interview, so-"

"No! I don't care, I'm not letting this go! I work at the last paper in the damn city that'll actually let me pursue this story, and if we don't do something about it now, I'm sure that'll change! Especially now that you know I'm not letting this go, but I'm not gonna be scared or chased off or-"

"I'm not a part of the group!" he shouted, his composure completely snapping. I kept my face neutral, but shifted my tape recorder in my pocket to make sure I caught every word of this, whatever it was. "Vernon Masters was an old family friend, and I let him lead me along like an idiot for way too fucking long, okay? The SSR is a war time agency, as he pointed out, and we're no longer at war! Which makes me the captain of a sinking ship."

He closed his eyes and took a long breath, and I frowned. When he finally opened his eyes again, he was staring straight up at the sky and shaking his head.

"Nobody's gonna want to work with the guy who took down one of the highest-ranking members of the war department. Nobody's gonna see the value in keeping the SSR, either. Once this ship goes down, I'm going down with it. And I have no idea what the hell I'm supposed to do about it."

My frown deepened, and I took a half-step closer to Thompson. He didn't look at me, but he didn't take off either.

"...What makes you think doing the right thing is going to cost you your career?"

He snorted. "Nobody wants a rat in their organization. Even a noble rat."

"Who the hell is calling you a rat? Not to kick you when you're down, but you were a rat when you were working with Masters and anybody else invovled in the shady shit. Not now."

Thompson's gaze finally dropped to meet mine. He shook his head, a bitter smile on his face.

"People in power don't tend to feel that way. The people who got me this job, the ones who'd be able to get me another one when the SSR goes down... none of them feel that way."

"Thompson, you can't know that-"

"Oh yes I can. Believe me, you might not have gotten your story to print yet, but the news of what I did is making its rounds. You should've heard the things my father-"

He broke off sharply, his jaw clenching and his stare returning to the wall behind me. My heart melted as the last of my anger disappeared, and reached out to rest a gentle hand on Thompson's arm again. He didn't move, and I wasn't sure if that was a positive or a negative.

"Your dad's the one causing the regret," I said. I didn't bother to phrase it as a question, since the answer was obvious. "He's the one trying to tell you taking down Masters and the rest of that group was a mistake."

Thompson shook his head. When he spoke, the words came out sharp and short, like he could barely keep it together.

"Called me himself a couple hours ago to remind me what a disappointment I am. Vernon Masters was a good family friend, and so are a lot of guys like him. I... I know taking them down was the right thing. I'm not an idiot, they didn't have me fooled for long. And I've worked my ass off to never be a coward again. But... I think the cost of this whole thing is going to be a lot higher than I realized. I might've done something good, but I'm pretty sure I just blew up everything else in the process."

As soon as the last word was out, it was like Thompson collapsed in on himself. His face was tight as he drooped, his shoulders curving in. I hesitated for a second. I did not feel qualified to try to comfort this guy, but there was also no one else around. I took a deep breath and stepped even closer to him, moving my hand to his shoulder. He looked up at me with hollow eyes.

"Alright, look... learning what I've learned about this corrupt group, yeah, there's probably more of them in power somewhere. And they probably wouldn't want you in any position to do to them what you did to Masters and his lackeys. But that's exactly why other people, especially the public, would want you in whatever position best enables you to catch the bad guys again. A good man in a position of power is a rare thing, and there are a lot of people who would campaign and fight for it."

Thompson scoffed. "I don't know that I count as a good man."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh please. You know damn well I wouldn't be saying that to you if it weren't true, I hated your guts when I first met you. Besides, you said yourself you're not an idiot. Don't buy into the horseshit your father or anyone else is selling."

Thompson's eyes searched my face, and I noticed a little more life in them. Nothing remarkable, but now he was more engaged and curious than I'd seen him at any other point tonight.

"Not to bring this back to my article, since that seemed to set you off pretty badly last time, but... if you wanted to give me an interview, I'd be happy to make sure my story makes a point of how badly the public should be wanting and pushing for you to continue in some government agency's leadership. Even if you don't want to give me an interview, actually. Although I have to say, I don't know I agree with your father or Masters about the SSR no longer being needed. There's a ton of weird shit like frozen lakes and apparently alien technology floating around, and I can't think of any other organization that seems equipped to handle that."

The faintest hint of a smile appeared on Thompson's face, but then a moment later, it morphed back into a furious scowl. He pulled a step away from me.

"I already gave you everything you wanted, didn't I?" he asked, his tone laced with disgust. "You had a tape recorder in the bar. I'd be willing to bet you still have it going."

My silence must've been answer enough. After a moment, Thompson shook his head, a deep, hurt scowl on his face. He marched away from me, and I hesitated. Maybe I should be including myself in the 'good person' debate for it, but after a moment, I made the right choice.

"Wait!" I called, running after Thompson. This time, he didn't stop, even when I grabbed hold of his arm. He yanked it from my grip, so I ran around him, stopping in the mouth of the alley to block his path. He shook his head, the dark glare still in place.

"You need to get the hell out of my way-"

I didn't let him finish before pulling the recorder out of my pocket and tossing it to him. He caught it out of reflex, then looked down at it, the frown now more one of confusion.

"You're right. I was recording. But in my defense, I thought I was going to get an impassioned admission of guilt for a bunch of bad shit. Not the personal stuff you gave me." Thompson looked up at me again, wary, but no longer furious. "The tape's yours, although I'd like the recorder back, please. Destroy it, or do whatever else you want with it. I won't print anything you told me in the alley."

"...Why?" he asked, clearly suspicious. I huffed.

"Because I'm a good person with ethics, dammit. Besides, your dad and all the people like him making you doubt what you did have nothing to do with the story I want to run. And I meant what I said. When I do get my story published, I'll make sure to make a point to the public about looking for people like you, who can do the right thing when it comes down to it. But... I'd still love a real interview, if you'd be willing to give me one. It doesn't have to be about anything more than the group you just took down."

Thompson just stared at me for a few long, long moments. I swear, I could see him warring with himself. I hadn't mentioned it, since it would work against me, but he must've realized that if he gave me my interview, he would lose any remaining chance at recapturing the support of his father and the other men like him. Still, after a painfully long wait, Thompson slowly nodded.

"Alright. Why not? I've already gone this far down the road. I guess I can do an interview, too."

I grinned. "Great. How do you feel about breakfast tomorrow? I'll buy, and you can give me my tape recorder back then."

A matching grin slipped onto Thompson's face, the first real smile I'd seen from him all night.

"Breakfast works. But I've got one other condition. I want dinner tomorrow night, and I'm buying."

I couldn't hold back a laugh. "Alright, at risk of sounding ridiculous... did you just ask me on a date?"

Thompson shrugged and took a step forward, the swagger from the first time I'd met him back and then some. This time, I didn't mind it quite as much.

"I did. You gonna say yes?"

I snorted and shook my head. "We're fifty-fifty on positive feelings towards each other when we meet up, and we're batting a thousand for yelling at each other. Let's just see how breakfast goes first, alright?"

Thompson shrugged, the grin still on his face. "Sure. We can do that. I'll pick you up from your office at... nine?"

I laughed again. "Fuck it. Sure. I'll see you then."

"I'll see you then," he said, giving me one last grin and an actual wink before he stepped around me, presumably heading to wherever he'd parked his car. I didn't move from the mouth of the alleyway for a few long moments as I processed everything that had just happened. A peaceful interview, a tenative friendship, and a possible date were three of the absolute last things I'd expected to result from tonight, and yet, here we were. Still, I couldn't help being hopeful for all three.

I'd have to remember to send my source a thank you basket. He'd never steered me wrong before, and he'd definitely maintained that reputation tonight.

****************

Everything Taglist: @rosecentury @kmc1989 @space-helen @misshale21

Marvel Taglist: @valkyriepirate @infinetlyforgotten @sagesmelts @gaychaosgremlin

[rhiaarrow]

I'm seeing a large amount of anxiety posting or doomposting here tonight so I'm just gonna take this opportunity to remind everyone here that it's okay to feel that way but if it ever gets too much, it's okay to just walk away.

Even just for a little bit, close the tab and go get a drink of water or just take a minute to yourself.

Don't feel obligated to interact with anything that causes you to feel stressed out.

It's okay to be optimistic about the situation in the same way that it's okay to be more critical. Unfortunately in the grand scheme of things, we don't have all the answers or the knowledge of what's going on behind the scenes, we won't know how things are happening until it's publicly announced.

The dismissal of the update account admins isn't really something that any of us wanted to hear had happened but it's at least a sign that things are actually being done behind the scenes.

Even if it may not seem like much it's at a small piece of proof that the admin funding issues are being addressed. Of course it unfortunately meant that it was revealed that they couldn't afford to keep the updates accounts admins but it's a small modicum of knowledge that they're at least looking into funding admins behind the scenes.

It's still frustrating not knowing what's going on and being left in the dark but ultimately there's nothing we can do except wait for news from an official source.

If I'm being honest stopped really watching as much Qsmp since the admin break, I've watched a couple past vods here and there and obviously I still watch Bad everyday (it's literally a part of my daily routine at this point) but I've not really been marathoning povs like I used to.

The admins were the life of the server and without them it just feels wrong, I was remaining hopeful while I watched Bad play on the server but his statement about reaching his limit today sorta hit.

Because yeah, I've reached a limit too.

I still love Bad and my other cubitos but the server right now just isn't hitting the same. So I'm gonna take my own advice and step back from the content and its fandom for a little bit.

Ultimately there's nothing I can do to help the situation at all and contributing my thoughts on something I have no real knowledge of just isn't really helping anyone.

I'm not getting overwhelmed by the doomposting or anything, I'm just choosing to distance myself for a little bit.

Although I do have qBads backstory to thank for reminding my old Ancient Mythology special interest from years ago which has overpowered my recent Qsmp fixation, so at least my brain has something to do while I take my little Qsmp break for a day or two :)

[irontragedyreview]

Ok, so I read the chapter with the official translation because if I'm going to say that Horikoshi is mediocre writer, that this arc was completely rushed and a shit show in general I'm going to use the official translations. It should be noted that honestly nothing can fix this chapter so meh, the relevant points would be

AFO loves Yoichi, some criticism focused on Afo saying this didn't make sense but  from the beginning of the arc we see AFO declaring that he loves his brother, since we know the story of OFA/AFO we know that he wantsYoichi by his side, but even beyond his methods of locking him up and wanting to break his will, the truth is that he wants Yoichi's decision to be by his side to be of his own free will. Even though he’s willing to break Yoichi, he didn’t want him to be by his side through some quirk manipulating his will, because that could have been an option, what he wanted when Yoichi was alive is for him to finally stand by his side.On the other hand, AFO's love isn’t healthy, it’s twisted and toxic because he considers Yoichi his, his first gift, the first object he had, so yeah, AFO loves his brother but no one is saying that this love is good or healthy.

Some people interpret that Kurogiri is dead, I'm honestly not interested in his character and the truth is I'm not very clear about what happened, I suppose it will be something that It will name above in the following chapters.

Midoriya showing empathy or compression for AFO? I've seen some comments saying that Midoriya's words are an attempt to show empathy towards AFO. Personally I think it’s completely wrong, if anything Izuku is telling him how small and pathetic he is, pointing out that he isn’t a demon king, he isn’t an incomprehensible monster, just a lonely man. There is no understanding or empathy but rather it’s establishing that he isn’t the terrible threat that AFO wants to think he represents but that he is ultimately a pathetic and lonely being.

AFO wanting to transmit his quirk to live in another body as a parasite, he says that Midoriya or anyone would do, this isn’t really true because although we know that a person can withstand a certain amount of quirks at some point it will fry their brain, Nagant handled her quirk well and one more, Spinner from what we saw became more irrational due to the quirk he received from AFO since his system was overloaded. So far the only one who has endured more than one quirk is Midoriya, although we can assume that he wanted to pass his quirk to another body and then if that body failed he could always look for another one.

bakugou is there, again nothing about horikoshi surprises me anymore.

Izuku and Tomura's talk, if those pathetic panels can be called that. Midoriya impassive, the only difference I find in the unofficial translations Izuku directly said he couldn’t forgive him, in the official one it isn’t so much the word forgiveness and more like he couldn't stand there just watching what he was doing. I use the official translations because 1) I don't know Japanese; 2) People usually argue that to discuss the points of story one should take the official translations. Since I don't know Japanese and the fandom is picky, I'll use these. Obviously it can be interpreted as that he can’t forgive what he did or forget it but well the truth is that I honestly don't think anything improves the talk. Tomura asking Midoriya to pass the message and telling him to tell Spinner that his convictions never changed, which it’s true I guess, although he also accepts that he couldn't destroy anything and that it may be that in the end he is that crying child that Izuku said, this line is interesting and something that a good author would surely seek to expand on, but considering that we’re talking about Horikoshi, we can leave it to the conclusion that hopefully the topic will be touched upon again or that nothing will ever be said.

Having said all the above, I imagine that there are only a few chapters left that make up a very long epilogue. At this point I doubt that Horikoshi will make a plot twist by reviving AFO a fourth time, I honestly hope not, some are talking about Tomura appearing in the form of Tenko? which at this point wouldn't fix anything either because you screwed up any chance of the save idea when you kept Izuku's plot going without a single introspective thought and ended it with him killing AFO in Tomura's body. The explanation would have to be very good to fix the shit show that was the chapter.

Some also say that Tomura isn’t dead, this is mostly because Horikoshi has used the resource of death and revived so many times that many no longer believe that he’s capable of killing a character, but I don't believe it if he’s saying goodbye, I doubt that miraculously appears alive. I would say that the chapters to come can’t be worse than this one but I fear that Horikoshi will take it as a personal challenge and do it.

[fushiglow]

[*a figure hobbles from the shadows*] hi glow - I'm breaking my streak of anonymity (or "denying thy embarrassment and refusing thy anonymity" as you put it) to say an official hello I guess. 👋

I just read your star wars au and I can't get over how GOOD your prose is. (?!?) It flows so naturally, and it feels like I can instantly see the entire depth of the scenes you create... I'm actually obsessed

.

Anyways, hopefully that didn't come off as too much 🙃 - truthfully, I'm just now getting into tumblr in my twenties and had self-imposed a bit of a fringe mentality. But you've answered so many of my anonymous asks at this point that I feel like I should just admit I'm a part of the jjk community now lol.

Plus, I did say I'd read anything you ever write, so, we'll see if this wave of bravado lasts or if I slip back into anonymity. Either way, thanks for helping to make this community so thoughtfully beautiful <3 💌✨📝

THE WAY I SCREAMED WHEN I SAW THIS! IT'S YOU, IT'S YOU, IT'S SHAKESPEARE ANON!

Thank you so much for popping in to formally introduce yourself, even though you weren't sure about doing so. It really means a lot to "meet" the person who's said such lovely things about my writing, thank you for all of your previous kind comments and these ones too!

Really happy you enjoyed the Star Wars AU! It's stupidly special to me because it's two of my special interests, past and present, colliding to become something beautiful. I'm delighted that other people are finding joy in it, because it felt incredibly self-indulgent to me!

You couldn't possibly come off as too much, I've finally thrown out all concept of shame in this fandom so nothing can scare me at this point. Thank you also for what you said in that last part... I don't really know what to say to that, you're very kind indeed ♥️ So good to hear from you and I do hope it won't be the last time — take care until then!

[dearweirdme]

Full disclaimer but this is gonna be a whole ass rant because I'm tired of the fact that even in the year 2024, people are still trying to shut us up when we call out HYBE and/or 0T7 fandom fuckery towards Taehyung.

Geffen, whose main fuckin usefulness is promotion, didn't even post for TWO whole fuckin days after Layover's release. HYBE had two months notice of estimated pre-order numbers from VBar and still managed to 'run out of stock' and couldn't fulfil the order that would legitimise him breaking and exceeding the record---then they tried to shift the blame to VBar, Taehyung's biggest fanbase and main solo support 😏, to the point where she had to show her receipts proving they had advanced notice of sale numbers with plenty of time to fulfil them.

Did we not all see those petty ass moments, even in the past, where staff bought ice creams for every member besides Taehyung so Namjoon had to share his own with him so he wouldn't be left out?

Or how about the fact that when a member's name is missed out in listings and promotional ads, most of the time it's Tae's? (With Jin also being treated in a similar fashion because I know some MF gonna pull the same old whataboutism on that)

Or how about the fact that the biggest group fanbases feel so comfortable with his mistreatment that they do it themselves openly, like posting BTS GROUP photos where he isn't even there, or posting BTS solo album photos where Layover isn't even there or even openly gloating about the fact that they screwed with his merch counts?

They make their derision so blatant and despise hin so clearly but 0t7 'fans' still wanna roll out in droves to defend their asses when they stay making 'mistakes' and those 'mistakes' coincidentally stay fucking Tae over

Who do y'all think these losers are taking their lead from?

Maybe it's the same company that in one of the festas gave all of the members fortune slips and only Taehyung's was used to shit on him; warning him that if that if didn't beat to HYBE's drum terrible things would happen to his career and his future would be dire?

Yes, all members have moments of shitty treatment from fans and the company but there is a CLEAR double standard on the fandom when it comes to Taehyung. The big '0T7' accounts do not move for Tae the same way they do for others and way too many are actively working against him and they get away with it because that's the line that has been normalised by HYBE.

Go look at any comment praising Taehyung specifically and damn near guaranteed that you'll find @0T7Becky underneath it talking about how we gotta praise all the guys all at once---at a rate that doesn't happen when it's the other guys getting singular praise.

Maybe we can even take a look at official content like Run eps where editors run a consistent 'joke' of Taehyung being dumb or selfish or how about the way they tooks shots at him through Tata or in one of their shitty games?

This shit is there to see and it speaks for itself but people still want to play dumb make their false equivalence and use whataboutism to shut down any discussion of it.

Anyone who says they're active on Twitter or in these fandoms, especially those who have been fans for a while, and doesn't see or remember the difference in how Tae is treated by the company and the fans is straight up lying. 400+ antis were exposed forming a group chat to hate on Taehyung and the 0T7 fandom was 🙈🙉🙊 Its not just a couple of haters talking shit; it's actual campaigns against him; ignored, enabled and even helped by the accounts that are supposed to be representing the fandom and sharing info.

One of the other members wear a hat with braids and the fandom wants to close ranks and protect them. Taehyung wears a durag and all of a sudden we're taking a 'let's spotlight that shit and correct his behavior' stance?

Like, yeah, maybe we should be letting the guys know what's up but there's no damn consistency and the collective only want a call to action if it means shitting on Taehyung.

How many times does Taehyung have to make his 'fuck you' policy towards the company clear before we actually listen to him? Not long ago, he pretty much told us that the only reason he re-signed was for the guys. It was outta his own mouth that he implied that HYBE was an 'aint shit' company.

Something in the water is obviously not clean when it comes to Taehyung's relationship with HYBE and it hasn't been for a while.

There's a reason he has so many solo stans and it's because these people have been pointing out the weird behavior towards him for a while and they've been shut down and shut up with any mention of HYBEs passive aggressive behavior towards him for years and the fact that the 0T7 fandom suddenly take a collective leave of absence when it comes to defending him, promoting him or hyping him.

So I'm not here for any motherfuckin complaints or comparisons when this fandom has operated for YEARS on a policy that Taehyung needs to be punished, held back and deserves to eat shit because at one point he was, according to them, getting too much attention, making too many famous friends (yeah, this shit really took off after Hwarang. They didn't like that Tae was being 'singled out' for acting roles) and they 'had to make it fair'

I'm sure there'll be some wanting to play delusional in response to thise but if you look for it you can find whole ass complications of how shitty HYBE has been towards Taehyung in particular and Jin. Their mistreatment towards Jin has been dismissive and disregarding. With Tae its headed towards pettiness and spite (coincidently the two members known for being the most stubborn and assertive with the company seem to be treated worse. Funny, right? but people still wanna say there's no smoke or no fire 😏)

The difference being that it's not only HYBE who treat Taehyung like shit.

You can find screenshot after screenshot of '0t7' accounts repeatedly 'apologising' and getting passes for making the same 'mistake' 20 fuckin times over and it's always about Taehyung.

Hi anon!

You put quite some time and effort and heart into this, so that’s why I’m posting this.. and also because I do agree with parts of your ask. I’m gonna cut the conversation short after this though, because from experience I know my asks are gonna be vile and messy 😑.

[griseldabanks]

For the 'even more fic writer's asks', 1 & 4 for Let Me Count the Ways, 2 & 6 for Cosmic Eclipse, 2 & 27 for the Foster Family AU, and 10, 11, 16, 19, & 23 for any fic(s) you would like to talk about, please!

Let Me Count the Ways:

Start to finish, how long did it take to plan and write? Did you take breaks during the process?

Well, this is ongoing, so the total time remains to be seen. And since it's a collection of oneshots, it really varies between each one how long it takes me to come up with the idea and write it down. Usually, if it's for a fandom I've written a lot for, the stories come faster and easier than fandoms I've never written for. And since it's such a huge project, it's something I want to keep doing on the side as I work on other projects as well. It's really nice as a palate cleanser between bigger projects, or something to work on when I want to procrastinate on something else ^^'

4. If the fic required it, what did you research in order to write it?

There have been a few that required a bit of research. For the one where Steve Rogers gets hit by lightning, I did some research to confirm the possible ramifications of that and proper first-aid care. For the one about Steve and Bucky going to "the Retreat," I had to do some research about what it even was, because I haven't seen Agents of Shield ^^' And then I looked up some common alien species for Anakin's little adventure on Coruscant.

Cosmic Eclipse:

2. How did you come up with the idea?

My roommate in college was actually the one who came up with it. I got her into Sherlock (only the first two seasons were out at the time), and one of the times we were talking about it, she was like, "Hey, what if Sherlock got blinded at some point? Do you think he could still solve crimes?" And after that one conversation where we discussed the different ways he could compensate for such a disability, I just...really wanted to write it.

6. How did you decide what tense and POV(s) to use?

Third-person past, because that's just the default. All but the last scene are from John's POV, because that's what I always do ^^' John is much more...ordinary, you know? I've always been intimidated about writing characters who are geniuses, because I am very much not a genius. Also, it's a lot easier to describe John reacting to things, because he doesn't try to pretend he's an emotionless machine :P And I managed to still tell the whole story just from what John is there to witness, except for that last scene. It's the pool scene where they meet Moriarty for the first time, and I've known all along it needs to be in Sherlock's POV. I need to use his ability to deduce all kinds of things about Moriarty, and it's also so much more interesting to see how his reactions might change if he can't see what's going on, whereas John would just react mostly the same way he does in canon.

Foster Family AU:

2. How did you come up with the idea?

I believe it was @bunnyscar who put in the request for Let Me Count the Ways, Ed and Mustang with the prompt "I can't believe I'm telling you this." I had the kernel of an idea - Ed going to Mustang for advice, admitting he likes Winry and trying to figure out how to ask her out. The problem was that I couldn't think of a believable scenario for why he would go to Mustang, of all people, in canon.

So then I had a brainstorm session with @rainintheevening, and I think it was her suggestion that I make it a modern AU where Mustang and Hawkeye adopt the Elric brothers. If they have an actual, official father-son relationship established, it would be more believable for him to ask for this kind of advice. And I'm an absolute sucker for Parental!RoyEd, so I immediately jumped on it. It didn't take long before I'd worked out all the specifics - like how, because there's no alchemy in this AU, Trisha's death and the consequences thereof would need to be something like a car crash rather than human transmutation. I also decided to make Al go mute due to the trauma, because there's not really a 1:1 analogy to him being stuck in a suit of armor. But this way, he has negative consequences to the accident in a way that's definitely debilitating for his daily life, but is ultimately curable, and I can twist it in such a way that Ed feels guilty about it.

27. Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

I haven't found a way to include this in a story yet, but I put a lot of thought into what Roy and Riza's jobs are. They saw active duty in the military, in some war overseas, and after they came home, they're both working for the VA. Roy isn't trying to become president or anything like that; he works in like...marketing? Campaigning? I don't know what you'd call it, but he uses his schmoozing skills and charisma to try to get more funding for projects and to get the veterans the help they need. I still haven't completely decided what I want Riza to do, but I was thinking maybe something like physical therapy. Both of them cut back on their hours/went part-time when the Elric brothers came into the picture, and Roy (primarily) homeschools them.

And for the rest of these, I will talk about my baby, Take Me In:

10. How did you approach writing the fic? (e.g. wrote it start to finish in order, started with the ending, starting with the twist)

I generally write start to finish. That's just how my brain works, and it bugs me if I don't know how characterization should have developed if I write out of order. There were a few exceptions, where I'd write a scene and then realize I needed another one before it or something like that. And when it came to writing the climax, I kind of skipped over all the complicated technical bits to just finish writing the emotional stuff, and then went back later to tackle the hard stuff.

11. What was the most challenging aspect of writing it?

It is loooooooooooooooooooooong! It took me about four years of focusing primarily on writing that, with a few breaks scattered throughout. Also, some of the stuff the fic deals with is much more technical than I ever thought I would get, and that required a stupid amount of research and second-guessing and bashing my head against the wall to try to figure out how to write it x.x

16. Talk about the fic’s biggest moment & how you came up with it

I'm going to be vague, since I haven't posted it yet, but the big turning point in TMI was actually the first scene I ever came up with :3 It's one of the emotional highs in the story, and is what transformed it from a casual what-if conversation with @sergeanttomycaptain to "THIS IS MY DESTINY AND IF I DON'T WRITE THIS FIC ASAP I WILL GO INSANE!!!!" I can't tell you how many times I wrote and rewrote it in my head before falling asleep, so by the time I actually got around to writing it out for real, the words flowed swiftly and smoothly. I knew exactly what I wanted to say and how to say it. I love it when that happens <3

19. While editing, did you kill any darlings? What were they?

I've actually amassed quite an impressive list of deleted scenes, which I will be including in the companion fic, Take Me Beyond, once the main fic is done. Most of them would be too spoilery to explain in full, but I will say there was once a time when I was going to have a scene where Steve says the Words to Bucky to turn him into the Winter Soldier! :O I still think that would be a suuuuuuuuuper angsty, dramatic, awful scene, but ultimately it just didn't make sense to have it happen.

23. How did you come up with the title?

The title comes from "Everything" by Lifehouse:

You calm the storms and you give me rest You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall You still my heart and you take my breath away Would you take me in, take me deeper now?

The song captures the feeling and the message of this story so well, I wanted to use it. And the main two previous fics in the series, Make Me Whole and Shards of Me, both had three-word titles where one of the words was "me," so I just had to find a phrase from the song that would fit the pattern. I'm quite pleased with it ^_^

Even More Fic Writer Ask Game

[goodfellowe]

I hope you don't mind me asking, but what originally got you into Hatstache? (If you ever answered this before, I am so sorry)

anon firstly i'm so sorry according to tumblr this ask has been sitting here since october 6th. i keep looking at it trying to word my thoughts and then telling myself ill answer it later and then... not doing that. lol

i got into ahit waaayyy back in 2019, when the fandom was mostly saturated with snatcher content at the time (people who have been following me since then probably remember that i hated him for like a solid two years just because he was everywhere lol). i remember very distinctly feeling very dissatisfied with how the game treated and wrote off mu after seeing her storybook, and i couldn't really find any postgame content that gave her a happy ending that i felt personally satisfied with. i ended up finding the hatstache tag on ao3 completely by chance trying to find that postgame content i wanted only to find that there were exactly two fics (neither of which i will not mention out of respect/not wanting that tied to my blog) that did not appeal to me for reasons lol.

the concept of it really stuck with me, though, even if i didn't find anything to fuel it with at the time. i like relationships where people who are hurting/have hurt each other work through it. and i am someone who looks way too into every little detail of everything, ever, and its always felt like mu both holds hk in a very high regard+was very hurt by her actions throughout the same. (see: dialogue+cut dialogue, graffiti around the game, the finale+mu's dialogue before it, the paintings, hk's 'betrayal', etc). paired with what little official content we did get of them being friends (postgame? maybe?) and it was a natural progression ehe

but even then i didn't actually feel super strong about it for a while. it was mostly just thoughts like 'damn, wish we got more content of them interacting' and 'it would be cute if mu had a little crush on hk without realizing'. i didn't actually get super passionate about it until i started writing the original version of twtt that summer/autumn (known as a crack in time at that point), and i only really wrote the ship in because 1.) i thought it would add some flavor and 2.) it made me really sad that there weren't too many options for people who wanted to read a hatstache fic at the time. and even then...

(screenshot from august 3rd, 2019. transcript in alt)

... it wasn't actually endgame. woah woah if you follow me for twtt please for the love of god put the pitchforks down they're endgame now and that's what matters. the story to twtt was significantly more different than it was now, but by the time i had actually wrote hatstache in, the ending i had planned for it was pretty bittersweet. it was just something i wanted to explore in my own self-indulgent way (as i always do ehe), and i was working through some stuff with my own sexuality and relationships at the time, so... yeah. threw it in for spice :D

then i started actually writing it and i just instantly fell in love with their dynamic and just how well their characterization worked with each other. i tend to write them as characters who come off as opposites at first interaction but are very similar at the core and that just makes them bounce off of each other really well. i got attached really fast, and as the story went down a totally different path than i originally expected, i was incapable of letting it go. it really just kind of worked its way into my heart. and the more i analyzed things and learned about the game and all of the little stuff hidden within/cut out, the more it seared itself into my brain until i was like... damn. i understand why they call it an otp now because i would go down with it. even when i trashed acit and took my year-and-a-half break from the fandom, hatstache was just a dynamic that lived in my head rent free.

it has a really special place in my heart because it is, in a way, what pushed me to start writing again and really exploring what i was capable of with my writing, too. and again its just a dynamic that i think can be explored in so many different wonderful ways. despite it all i want them to be happy and by god they will be... eventually :)

i guess basically to answer your question i just kind of wrote myself into it... but i hope you enjoyed my little trip down memory lane+some history behind the creation of twtt (there's a lot of it)

thank you for asking <3

[onewomancitadel]

You know what, I only made one pithy post about this a year and a half or more ago so

I'll make a post breaking down my official position on that one H/bomberguy video criticising R/WBY:

Chiefly, I believe his style of narrative analysis (or lack thereof) is fundamentally broken. He doesn't really have any coherent drive except narrative literalism (and cynicism) and having forcibly sat through his videos he's never really been good at articulating why stories should work as they do, he just says so (and almost always in a way inappropriate to the story's setting). It's really effective for the platform he works on, because there's a false authority assigned to YouTubers and the positions they take on topics without due justification that a rando on Reddit or Tumblr couldn't get away with (particularly on fandom topics - where we're usually otherwise equal - what do you think of when you hear Alt Shift X? I think Alt Shift X can be pretty decent, but we know he has a certain credit in the A/SOIAF fandom that other fandom writers don't - and he always cites his sources and especially his Tumblr ones, so it's not something that the author can totally control). He just says that things don't make sense and I guess I have to believe him.

A corollary of what the platform engenders is that he's provocative. This can be effective for his political content but in my eyes he seems to enjoy dunking on other men more than actually substantially supporting a feminist cause, and I think his interest in criticising narrative comes from a similar dark place. I just don't buy his bullshit sorry. This is really more of a personal point but it's worth mentioning for my own bias against his criticism because I think he's an intellectual charlatan. I don't care how much money he donated to charity, I'm talking about his Internet personality (I don't know who he is as a person).

He claims in the R/WBY video that he's always respected Monty Oum (but character assassinates the writers) yet there are forum posts on SomethingAwful documenting his disgust for Monty and anime fans, and the fans who see themselves in Monty (who was self-made), implying that the enjoyment of R/WBY comes from a place self-insertion and wish fulfilment. I think it's important to establish that he could have changed his position on Monty in making the video, but he does specifically claim to always have had held an admiration and I think that's disingenuous at best. He clearly has a bone to pick with R/WBY and its ostensibly embarrassing and self-involved fanbase and it shows in his analysis. That's why he's interested in implying that the writers of the show are perverts sexually attracted to their female characters. Most damningly his classic move of pitting Monty and the writers against each other was pioneered by R/WBY fans who rejected the direction of the show after his passing and so grew the hatewatching fanbase which (similarly) gained traction on YouTube. To weaponise a glory of the auteur who had an untimely death in order to demonise a show you don't like is actually beyond pathetic.

I don't believe this was necessary to criticise R/WBY but this is why I feel he's ultimately disingenous in his analysis of R/WBY. I also think that if you believe a work to be a product of sexual perversion, you probably can't take the narrative all that seriously; it's two hours of thankless work, really. This is what I mean about lacking a sensible narrative lense, because he doesn't really have one. If the narrative is unserious, then you treat it unseriously; if you want to treat perversion seriously, then you don't beat-by-beat try to intuit magical fairytale worldbuilding according to your irresponsibly applied analysis. The tone of a work needs consideration.

The character assassination (because that's what it is) of the writers implicating them as sexual perverts, writing R/WBY from a place of sexual perversion, is enough for me to seriously question his intentions, particularly given the way he framed the information (with you to draw your own conclusions about, say, Miles saying Yang is the hot one, or dresses provocatively, when she is seventeen). I think it's seriously irresponsible to use supposed feminist ends to bolster your own poor argumentation and it's just too revealing of the frailty of his position and his overall channel aims. It's telling that he left out the fact that the writers have a definite position on sexist anime tropes, which is that of rejecting them, one example being they specifically eliminate any chance of your regular disgusting 'panty shot'. I don't know the writers myself, but I'm not trying to evaluate their personality, I'm trying to evaluate their work, which I feel successfully remixes regressive gender tropes in ways that work in the story and the 'male gaze' is largely absent. Let's not get into the Heroine's Journey. Nevertheless, precious little is eroticised in R/WBY (and even when it is, it tends to be subverted e.g. 'pervy uncle' Qrow who makes up his stories about women).

The paucity of this offense regarding R/WBY - something that is partly up to an individual to decide regarding the gender regression, or lack thereof - is quite telling about the rest of his argumentation. I couldn't tell you what H/bomberguy dislikes about R/WBY except that he thinks its fans are stupid and he doesn't like mythic storytelling or his favourite anime being referenced by the anime he doesn't like in a way he doesn't like either.

So if there's no cohesion to his analysis, how can I possibly address it? It seems that we simply have irreconcilable differences in approach to narrative. The fact that I've not seen his subsequent sequel (if he ever made it) about the rest of the show really limits the discussion too, since the first three volumes establish the foundation of the show (and to be honest my favourite volumes are V4-V8, which transform the setting).

I wrote this post out because I have mutuals who've never seen R/WBY but probably know H/bomberguy made a video on it, and for other R/WBY fans who wondered how I handled that criticism - since I am overall a relatively well-documented apologist for the show.

I get that H/bomberguy has a reputation as being a Lefty-ish YouTuber who was one of those who popularised the scathing, several-hour long critiques of popular media. I think that this is an embarrassing genre overall and done well by few, and is responsible for fandom discourse predicated upon ego, provocation, and clickbait; further, the length just implies an inability to convey an effective point overall, and makes it impossible to write a succinct rebuttal. I am thankfully saved by the fact H/bomberguy cannot narratively intuit his way out of a paperbag.

Finally, I think that those in Star Wars Prequel Trilogy glass houses shouldn't throw stones at geeky R/WBY fans. Unless you defend the PT from a monomythic perspective - which he does not do - I can't take your opinion on anything sincerely.

[papawty]

A return to childhood

Since I was young, I've always loved Japanese culture. My brother exposed me to anime: Spirited Away and Princess Mononoke being the first Ghibli films I've watched. My sister and I were obsessed with HunterxHunter and Prince of Tennis growing up. I drew anime-style, and was good enough with it that I made my own comics that my friends and classmates enjoyed.

Anime was a huge inspiration and part of my life... up until my late teens.

As I grew older and anime became more 'mainstream', I sadly took a break from it - was a little ashamed of it, even. I didn't want to be associated with 'weird stuff' and tried to be like a 'normie', so there a gap in my life where anime wasn't part of it.

Of course, as you get older you eventually also stop giving a fuck.

It was Covid when I returned to my childhood obsessions. HeroAca especially was something that I clung onto during those days. I still remember watching Season 4 in my jammies and cheering Izuku as he saves Eri-chan.

Then I fell off it again. But it's not that I was ashamed of it. It was still there, and I remember rewatching Fullmetal Alchemist (my favorite anime of all time) like it's an annual ritual. But I wasn't obsessed with it enough to make it a huge part of my personality.

That happened only around 2023.

At this point, I was looking for a different hobby. I went crazy over several TV shows until they ended. I've tried K-Pop and Selkie dresses, but both of them were honestly taxing for me to keep up with. I was already thinking nothing's going to stick with me and I'll spend the rest of my life jumping from one hobby to another.

I'm not sure if I should tell the nitty-gritty details of how the brainrot took hold, but it involved a video of Kirishima Eijirou and Bakugou Katsuki.

I was sucked in. I couldn't stop myself from consuming content about these two blorbos. I even started reading fanfics, which I already knew existed (and have written one in my teens in the '10s), but tried to avoid.

Eventually, I made a fandom account. It opened a whole new world for me, but it wasn't enough. It's difficult wanting to spazz about something you love but feel like you're only screaming to the void. By this time, the KiriBaku fandom is already established and everyone had cliques and circles. I didn't know how to insert myself into them as a new fan.

Enter Canary.

We weren't even that close yet, just casual mutuals when she read my tweet about finding online friends difficult, and she invited me to this server where I found the people I could now trust with my life. From here on, it only got better.

I started joining fandom events. Buying merchandise - first, from official and apparel ones only, to eventually buying collectibles and fan-made merch. I started writing again, and it was beautiful to return to it - to be back to a core part of what made me me. Writing has always been something I cannot separate from myself, and I will always owe HeroAca for giving me back the joy of writing.

I found so many wonderful people through fandom. My circle extended from the Discord server to the larger creative community - and it is wonderful to be part of this. I can give my best at work knowing I can enjoy talking about my favorite characters with my friends at the end of the day. There's another layer to my personal life that I can enjoy other than just being me. When I lost my job, I wasn't fully struck down during those months because I know I'm not just that person - I'm also Yza, and Yza is part of a community that gives her support and love and sees worth in her.

It was healing to find myself again through this.

[kiss-my-freckle]

Recently (the 19th) was the 12th anniversary of the Delena motel kiss and I'm feeling super nostalgic. I remember 2 days before there were Canadian fans who claimed to have seen a clip "Why don't you let people see the good in you?" scene and within 24 hours later there was a Canadian promo that spoiled the Delena kiss and Julie tweeted "Dear Canadian promo people, what the fuck?" There was a weeks long break before 3x19 and the promo for it right after 3x18 while not spoilery was exciting and it was promoted as a Delena episode. The promo had the soundtrack "Turn it Back" which doesn't make sense for Delena since it has the lyrics "Turn it back to the days when you were mine." There were Stelena fans threatening to boycott after the kiss leaked lol. Because of the motel scenes in the promo I couldn't hold my excitement and would constantly lurk on Julie and Nancy (TVD editor for 3x19)'s Twitter for potential spoilers for weeks. The producer's promo for 3x19 before the kiss leak had Julie start smiling when she said the episode would be about Elena exploring her feelings and that it's just awesome. There was a spoiler that a Florence and the Machine song was featured but most fans speculated it was "No Light No Light." I miss the Delena fandom back then, but I was more of a passive bystander before I stopped watching for years, but wish I was active back then because the fandom now drains the enjoyment of being in it. There were people speculating Delena would have sex in 3x22 since there was a spoiler hinting at either them or Caskett but it ended up being Caskett. The Damon met Elena first spoiler was leaked a day before the finale but most fans thought it was a fake spoiler. I heard some fans on the now nonexistent official TVD forum (which I unfortunately never saw) convinced people who worked on the show to leak scripts to them so they could read it before episodes came out. I do remember during season 4 someone said someone they knew told them a Delena sex scene was being filmed and that person thought it would be 4x4 but it ended up being 4x7.

I honestly wish I watched the show as it aired because that was the moment I knew she was Damon's girl. I would've been posting on Twitter all week long in my support of their inevitable Delena ship. Damon's response to Elena's question is insane because he's straight-up telling Elena he doesn't wanna disappoint her, and he's saying this while laying next to her in bed with his shirt completely unbuttoned. Damon is leaving the disappointment to Stefan, put it that way lol. Stelena fans should be more pissed at the scene as the full episode airs than when the kiss is leaked because it's not just a kiss, it's a surrender. Stefan's girlfriend is gone. imo, she's been gone as I consider 3x5 her un-fall, consider both Stefan and Elena ghosts in Ghost World. The repeat is necessary.

"But it's not real. She's dead. Gone. Everything that you're holding on to is in the past, Jer."

"A Japanese lantern is the symbol of letting go of the past. Well, here's a news flash: we're not Japanese!"

Interesting how fans considered No Light, No Light by Florence + the Machine as it speaks to the end of a relationship and more from Stefan's pov. When the Light Dies Out by Christel Alsos is perfect for Delena's car ride home. Their track for Stelena's 20s dance is from Stefan's pov. I would've laughed my ass off seeing that promo with the "Turn it Back" soundtrack. Had I watched the show as it aired and saw the leak, I would've guessed the right soundtrack for Delena's kiss based on 3x10 and 3x11. I expected Elena to be fully transitioned in 3x22. While I could see her sleeping with Damon at the motel, you can't rush perfection. I wouldn't have considered the flashback of Delena in 3x22 as a fake spoiler for the same reason Stefan met her before he met her. They didn't just know of her existence. They both met her at some point based on their pilot comments. They had to show Damon's pilot comment, and they did. Stefan first meeting her needed to be as it was because they already spoke of how he saved her from drowning. It's through Stefan's own comments that fans had to know Damon met her before their car went off the bridge. Had Damon met her after their drowning, Stefan would've known he was home and likely stayed out of Elena's life for the sake of keeping Damon out of her life. They can't have Stefan stalking her, yet have him know nothing about her meeting Damon. OMG, I'm so glad they didn't do Delena's sex in 4x4 because I really love their college party dance scene. It's great to see Elena have fun with him before she has sex with him.

[oasisdew]

~Clinginess in AkiUge~

A thread

So this is probably one of the widest spread 'belief's in given fandom that Akihiko was the clingy one in AkiUge. He was the one who couldn't give UP, wouldn't let go. I did get a CC about this once too because I have always said the opposite. I had thought about making a thread then. But then real life got in the way and I couldn't. 

Anyway. I do think that Ugetsu had always been the clingy one in AkiUge, at least in the present manga timeline and the thread below is why.

So this (code 8) is the first time we see Ugetsu in the Manga outside of Akihiko's thoughts. (We saw him in Aki's memory before in code 7 and that was very suspicious too but I'll talk about that at the end of this thread.)

This is him, clinging to Akihiko here. Asking for attention. Akihiko did NOT initiate the contact. This is him showing some interest in Akihiko knowing full well that he craves it. (or not knowing it, I am never sure what the fandom at large wants to think Ugetsu as, clever man who pays attention to everything, who can read Mafuyu or Akihiko and read the situation better than most OR just a dumb asshole who just obliviously manages to do the exact thing that'll hurt the other party the most because he is emotionally unstable and too in love.

This is him asking Aki to play violin with him because his current boyfriend is not up to his liking and obv that automatically means or implies that Akihiko at least is better liked than the guy he called his boyfriend then because he only liked that guy for his face.

Do I think he is being honest here? I don't, but I won't tell anyone to come to any conclusions either. I am just pointing things out here.

The second time we saw him, this is what happened. Akihiko once again did not start the conversation.

I personally think it's because he had been abused for a long time and knew to stay wary of Ugetsu when happy at least subconsciously, but people can think differently.

So this is what happened here, he saw Akihiko was happy, and asked what it was he was being happy about, very not suspicious behavior for someone who really is interested in another person. And then when he got Akihiko's attention he proceeded to ignore him. The thing I find intriguing here is how he thought it's a 'shame', we don't know exactly what the shame is.

The unofficial translation made it a bit more obvious, “to let it go.” but let's stick to the official one, because clearly Kizu is trying to remain vague here.

But, this thing, as far as I am concerned, does tie to this scene there in code 17, “I am sure I will never find anyone better than him.” “He really is a good guy.”

This is when he is thinking about that time that he broke the mug and he regrets it.

What he regretting about is the question, breaking the mug? Or endangering his relationship with Akihiko because he'll never find another one like him? You think about your own answer, I have mine.

OK, so then jumping back to code 16, which is the next time that we see Ugetsu. I am sure the whole thing he did here is to get away from Akihiko too xD

NO I am being sarcastic but the thing is that Ugetsu is never not consistent. It's up to you how much you want to justify him. You do you.

But at least don't try to deny that here too Ugetsu did initiate the things between them. Akihiko actually gritted his teeth when he realized Ugetsu had come back. But well he proceeded to have sex so ofc you can go blame him.

There is this scene in code 20 where Aki has been thinking about the basement, and we see Ugetsu clinging to him in bed too. Which might be symbolic knowing Kizu, but which is there. Ugetsu spooning Akihiko when Aki is looking in the opposite direction.

And then I get back to the initial scene of Akihiko thinking about Ugetsu, which I think had been their first time or at least first sexual contact, and there also I think Ugetsu had been the initiator but this is just me thinking and I am not asking anyone to believe things the way I do without any proof. But here also we see Ugetsu touching Aki's palm on his own cheek and it's not the other way around.

Okay, then, after Akihiko got out of the basement, this was the first and only time he went back to it. Code 26. And this is what happened. Ugetsu being playful with him. Hitting him with a pillow probably, “Are you my mom?” then asking why Aki wants to get out of there, then losing his shit because ofc he loved Aki too much. 😔Aki never initiated any contact except being mildly worried about his well being, but presumably he had been over Ugetsu by then so that was expected.

Code 27, Ugetsu understands that it's Haruki who is responsible for whatever he anticipated, then fully knowing that trying to get away so that Akihiko can not catch up to him outside of the basement. This is in clear contrast with how Haruki reacted to Akihiko playing the violin too.

But then the whole thing happened where Ugetsu stunned Akihiko asking if he was breaking up with him or not whereas as far as Akihiko was concerned there was nothing to break up, but he went along with him so yeah… 🤧 but I digress.

Anyway. The thing I tried to point out here is that Ugetsu had always been the toxically clingy one in this relationship. You can justify how you want it to. I don't care.

That doesn't mean Akihiko is not the clingy one by nature. That's his weakness actually. Which Ugetsu exploited.

Ofc everyone can think for themselves. And come to different conclusions. The fact remains though that Kizu has shown Ugetsu to be the clingy one in that relationship.

[violetlunette]

Your review for chapter 4

The exam is fine in isolation. You can tell by looking at it that the purpose of this exam was so that Izuku could punch a giant robot, break three of his limbs, and save and be saved by Uraraka. Bakugo also got a high score in a test that catered perfectly to his quirk. It succeeded in its goals and was a very memorable moment. The first time Izuku ever went SMASH. MHA really hit at the perfect time when superheroes were big and it provided constant action. Maybe a bit too much in retrospect, since we never got much Academia in the My Hero.

The problem comes with Shinso in the sports festival.

An invisible girl managed to pass it. That same invisible girl got a higher score on Aizawa's physical test than Izuku, despite her quirk doing nothing for her. What's Shinso's excuse? The logic here is that Toru was either punching robots or rescuing people, and Shinso failed to do both. I think we're supposed to care about and feel sorry for this kid though? The only message you can take away from this is that he's lazy and wanted to coast through with his quirk. But we're meant to want him to get into the hero course and feel hype when he's training with them. He wasn't mad because the test was unfair, he was mad because his quirk didn't work on robots. There's persistent fanon that the robots had secret off switches, which despite all the years of the MHA fandom being a thing, nobody's been able to dig up where that was stated. I don't believe statements without evidence, and nobody's ever been able to provide proof of this. But even if we assume this is real...

It makes Shinso even more of an idiot. Apparently UA provided a back door to help kids who couldn't punch robots get in, and he was too daft to see it. So the story wants us to see that the exam was unfair, but someone who gets literally zero advantages from their power in the test passed it. He spends a lot of time griping about other people having perfect quirks and living a charmed life. Toru destroys his argument entirely. I bet she wishes she had Brainwash. There's also Koji. It wasn't until the Joint Training Arc that we learned that Koji has enhanced strength from being a rock person. I don't recall a moment before that which we could know this. Tokoyami for example has a bird head. But he doesn't display any crow traits, such as mimicking sounds or having superb eyesight. His are just cosmetic. Koji's personality isn't the type to have animals get hurt fighting robots, and it's unlikely that there were conveniently placed bears for him to use nearby. So he must have punched robots too, I guess. We know NOW he's enhanced, but at the time of the sports festival he'd be another person whose quirk wouldn't have helped him much, because he doesn't see animals as disposable tools. None of this matters or would be thought about by anyone if not for Shinso bringing attention to it. By the way, since I'm talking to you right now, when are you doing another poll? I like those.

Oh shoot, I forgot to mention the punch! Yeah, Hori really does do well on the action scene when he pulls them up. (Though there’s a little much lately, but I guess that’s the audience.) I’m with you though. If it ain’t in the manga or official work, it doesn’t count, especially if it’s an important plot point, like in this case. Some may argue that Shinso didn’t get in because he has a “villainous” quirk but we’ve never seen anyone bothered by that, especially the heroes. What they do say is that he failed the hero course because his quirk isn’t a combat quirk. But that always raised the question; how the hell did Toru get in then? She’s not strong physically and, at this point, has no way of disarming anyone. We’ve seen she’s not an academic genius, so it wasn't her brains that got her in. Fans can speculate all they like about buttons or whatever but without proof, it’s just a plot hole. (Plus, buttons were never mentioned so how would Toru know about them? It’s more likely she got in the way Elle Woods did without the GPA backing.) But I’ll talk more about it when I get to the sports festival and not sporting a fever. I think I’ve touched on this in previous posts if you want to look it up. Just search the Shinso critical tag, and you’ll find it. As for the polls, I’ve been playing with posting one, so I’ll just do it. Just keep following!

[bigbadredpanda]

Hi,, I hope I'm not bothering you with this and I'm sorry if my English isn't good, I hope you can understand my questions. I've been thinking about this for a while now and I tried to find information online but I found nothing.

MDZS is the first Chinese Novel I've read and I still haven't finished it yet,,but I've heard about rumors that said that MXTX is in jail, because she sold copies of her books. The rumor isn't true, however it made me wonder something,, I know China's censorship on lgbt related stuff is really heavy and that's why the donghua and drama adaptations of MDZS and other bl works are censored, but I didn't know that authors couldn't sell their novels.

So my question is,, how does MXTX earn money if she isn't allowed to sell her works? She has already finished 3 Danmei novels, and her works are really popular, they even have manhua, donghua or drama adaptations. The adaptations have earned quite a lot of money, but since she's an anonymous writer, does part of it even go to her?

To make the drama, the donghua and the manhua, producers had to ask her permission, I think. So, since the adaptations are doing well, she should get part of the profit, but how does it work? If the Chinese Government really is against lgbt themed works, shouldn't they have done something about her?

I really love her works and I hope that she earns something since she is the one that created all of them. Thanks for considering my question!!

Hi both of you and welcome to the cnovel fandom! Quick intro of the author, MXTX uses a pen name like many webnovel authors, it’s the abbreviation of Mo Xiang Tong Xiu which literally means “Ink Fragrance, Copper [Money] Stench” (墨香铜臭). Fun fact, it’s her mother who coined that name. MXTX wished to pursue a major in literature during university but her mother wanted her to graduate in economy instead while keeping writing on the side, that way she would have the fragrance of ink in one hand and the stench of money in the other.

We also know that she is fairly young, she wrote Scum Villain while she was a university student and she started working on the outline of MDZS in her final year. Tian Guan Ci Fu (Heaven Official’s Blessing) is the third book she completed and a fourth novel is/was in the works, its provisional title is “No rest for the death god” and is supposed to be a supernatural story taking place in a modern setting.

MXTX is one of the most popular webnovel authors on Jinjiang Literature City, the webnovel platform, but her popularity also comes with a great many detractors. You’ve heard some of the malicious rumours circulating in the English-speaking side of the fandom, it’s just a drop in the ocean compared to the outpouring of heated controversies in the Chinese side as the latter can have real-life consequences. There is a different nexus between the creator and the audience and the fandom culture is not the same either, it can be quite deleterious due to the tendency to report any content that one disagrees with.

Censorship in China is... ever-changing and nebulous. How severe it is depends on the medium. Nevertheless, gay literature (同志文学) does exist in China and it is distinct from danmei. I also want to nuance a bit the pervasive idea that anything lgbt is systematically and relentlessly censored in China. The reality is more complex than that and it would be dismissive of the hard-fought gains and visibility that Chinese lgbt activists have obtained these past two decades (some concrete examples: the work of the lgbt centre in Beijing or the pride festival in Shanghai). I don’t know if people are aware of this but lgbt dating apps are thriving in China, the most popular one, Blued, is also the largest lgbt social network worldwide. With that said, the official policy towards homosexuality is the three No’s: “no approval, no disapproval, no promotion”. A stance comparable to the “don’t ask, don’t tell”. It’s not explicit persecution but it manifests in the silencing of public discussion and the limiting media representation of homosexuality. In 2017, the top media regulator that oversaw radio, film and television  issued guidelines banning a number of things, this included obscene and violent content, homosexuality, superstitious pseudoscience (such as reincarnation or spirit possession). On top of that, there is also an ongoing crackdown on online pornography that gets increasingly intense. And that concerns everyone on the internet, it’s astonishing the lengths netizens will go to in order to circumvent the censorship, new slang is developed to refer obliquely to banned words, fanfics are published in image format to prevent text recognition, etc... The censorship might be increasingly prevalent but netizens push back with their resourcefulness. Pushing back is also not without significant risk. Perhaps you have heard of the case of the danmei author that received a severe jail sentence? A few Western media picked up on that and criticised the ruling that was deemed homophobic. Chinese reactions tell a slightly different story, the author's crime was not writing danmei, she was in fact accused of making a profit by illegally producing and disseminating pornographic material. I’m not too keen on the details but it seems she printed the books herself and sold them online. To some Chinese observers, the ruling was not discriminatory because she did break the law. To others, it was absurd because this law dates from an era when internet barely existed and it would have been much more laborious to mass-produce and share porn at that time. There’s a bit of truth in all these points of views. It’s also not disingenuous to say that lgbt content is more likely to be targeted than het content even if the charges are not directly lgbt-related.

Usually contracted authors of webnovel platforms have a more secure status. They get a fee from the purchase of VIP chapters as well as tips from the readers. Other sources of revenue arise when webnovels get popular enough to get the opportunity to be published through official channels or when adaptation rights are sold (I assume that the author receives a share of that deal but perhaps does not get any further financial gain from the adaptation or its merch).

To support the author, I would suggest purchasing TGCF on Jinjiang (guide) or buying the physical versions of her three novels in Chinese (shop, change to English with top-right world icon), the special boxsets of MDZS and TGCF come with tons of goodies!

Hope I could be of service and that my tirade was mildly informative ^^'

[alottamoney]

This is very frustrating because you can't be messaged.Nevertheless I would like to share something very serious with you. These are strictly speculation. Firstly I would like to clear my position with Taekook.Long story short: I believe them.

Quite recently I stumbled upon a theory about Taekook's coming out process that seemed very logical to me.The summary of the theory is, the art that BTS has been releasing from the beginning,or from 2015-16 to be exact, have been quite evidently inspired by Taekook's journey from discovering themselves, to then losing themselves, to then finally be able to find their happiness and true-self with each other.From Stigma, to DNA,to FAKE LOVE.A lot of BTS songs are talking about a hurtful love filled with sadness.Also, the kind of songs Taekook listens to and covered from the beginning traces that journey from sadness to happiness.From the official songs,Singularity, The truth untold,Heartbeat,House of Cards,Whalien,Make it Right to name a few.It's justified to assume that BANGPD supports them and love them.But if it is so then why the separation from time to time?According to this theory it is to prepare the ARMY very slowly to getting used to Vkook.We have seen since 2017 taekook is used to promote the Album the most,to hype it up,and once the Album's released,it's the watchful eyes again.BangPd was very supportive of Jkwon,a kpop idol who likes drag.But he also told him that you cannot throw a stone into a still lake and expect everyone to be fine with it.It will take a long time to get the water to settle down.What bangpd is doing with Taekook is he is engineering a very long process of getting people used to the message of acceptance through messaging of their album,love myself,be yourself.He is creating a generation that is used to these ideas so that when that stone lands,there will be no ripple.

Now nitpicking time.Tae and BangPD share a mutual dislike for each other.It's not a secret.Because Tae made it obviously clear on many occasions. Everyone in the kpop world knows it.Starting from Taekook's relationship, V was being portrayed as a non-essential member.Idk if it was a coincidence,but taekook is the king of coincidence and the timing somehow matches.It got to the point where he had only 1/2 lines in a song. If you know Tae's journey, you would know and I'm not gonna elaborate the extent to which it was bad.I also get the feeling he doesn't like Kookie's personality(he doesn't respect him) because he has a psychological need for Tae built in him.The golden Child of BTS.If BangPD is supporting Taekook and engineering their smooth coming out,and taekook are in on it,then why do they seem displeased when separation happens?It has happened so many times that there is no other option to consider than them being unhappy with the situation.

My pessimism will take over from this point.It's about money in the end.I personally believe BangPD supports lgbt.Before elaborating on my point I want to present someone else's viewpoint who I had a discussion with.They are even more pessimistic than me.A bit hilarious too.According to them if BangPD really supported Lgbt he would not try to corner Tae like that.It's an unwritten code among lgbt that you hold each other's relationship up despite your personal things.According to them BangPD used all these messages for marketing purposes and used Taekook and the members as a gimmick for it.That's why he was okay with Jikook but not taekook.Tae did not like jikook happening on stage to the extent it was happening but it was given a free pass in the name of it being just a job.According to this person,an lgbt supporting person would never do something like that to a lgbt relationship.Scary stuff.

Now my elaboration : BangPD is not necessarily protecting Taekook or BTS,he is protecting his investment. He wants to engineer a smooth path for their coming out but only under his term?I know before military it's unthinkable and even after that, my opinion is Taekook are not the declaring in a statement type couple.They prove by actions,not by words.That's why I am a bit confused as to what pd's thoughts are regarding Taekook future.All I know is that Tae does not like it when someone instructs him how to behave in his own relationship.He's been throwing middle fingers left and right to whoever can see.If they are not on the same page with Pd's plan for them,then....what?On a sidenote: I am sure JJK and KTH1 mixtapes are getting delayed due to profit sharing issues.You just know they are going to break every record out there.V said in 2019 that his mixtapes were ready for release that year,and he wanted to see how ARMY react to it and then he uttered something very interesting"It's going to be delayed anyway"..then he laughed in the brattiest way possible at the staffs while spoiling 😂 BH couldn't get that sweet sweet money from "Sweet Night".Going back to my previous point,it really seems like everything is connected to money.Does BANGPD want a situation where if Taekook have to come out,whether by accident or something else,he can be there to take advantage of the situation?Like saying he supported them all along,and the money will come in as support for them pours in.Idk how that will a viable situation.For one, Tae will consider eating poison before agreeing to letting PD use his personal relationship for circus,and it's fair to assume BangPD knows it.Then what about the possibility that PD really is like a strict parent,who wants the best for his children even though his methods are torture.Did he think taekook not being a couple was in their best interest?Taekook's interest/BTS' interest?Like I said, I personally believe pd supports lgbt.He doesn't like Tae's personality,his rebellious streak.I could be wrong but would his personal dislike move him to create tough situation for taekook even though he supports lgbt.It seems unlikely because wouldn't it create unhealthy environment within the group,pd must have known this.Or did he think it's just a teenage romance,one push and it will break easily.All of these possibilities because all I have gotten that TK are not happy when their relationship is micromanaged.

Now there's Lisa in JK's Vlive correcting his steps in Euphoria.Guess we are all delulu at this point.I really think that was Lisa though.Don't ask.I'm sorry for this long ask.Please share with me what you think.

Hi anon, I'm happy that you shared your views on Taekook. My opinion on this topic might be disappointing but I'll share anyway.

First, I don't have a coming out theory because I don't think any BTS member would willingly reveal any sort of romantic relationship because of the fan frenzy around them.

I don't analyze MVs, lyrics, and such because these things involve a lot of input from a lot of people: producers, composers, lyricists, designers, stylists, choreographers, etc. It's much more than just BTS sharing personal stories and trying to find clues about the members' private lives from them is a pointless venture according to me. The covers and song recommendations made by Tae and Jungkook in the earlier years, like you pointed out, have more weightage in this regard.

About Bang and his relationship with Tae and Jungkook: I think there is a large gap between fandom perception and what has actually been shown. While I don’t think Tae is Bang’s bias, I also don’t think he dislikes him or is out to sabotage him. It is even possible that him “favoring” Jungkook does not extend beyond his potential marketability. He seems indifferent for the most part to them as individuals. Assuming Tae and Jungkook are in a relationship, I agree that maybe Bang did not take it seriously until he had to. He could also have done a lot more damage than just separate them on screen or cut them out of content so I don’t think he micromanages them outside work (or may he tried and Tae and Jungkook are just that inseparable🤷🏻‍♀️). He might even consider it beneficial, not in a direct financial manner but in that it makes them easier to control and monitor- two less NDAs to worry about. It doesn’t help that Tae and Jungkook are also very erratic in a way that can’t be attributed to company micromanagement. That could explain some inconsistencies, they’re also figuring it out (and they’re a bit dramatic about it in my opinion).

Jokwon hasn't said anything about his sexuality explicitly, I don't know if this counts as an example of Bang's support of the LGBTQ community but he seems open-minded enough and he hasn't said or done anything homophobic. Tae and Jungkook though are part of his biggest cash cow so, while he might not be homophobic it's not a stretch to assume he has different standards for them vs Jokwon who isn't signed to his label. About using the members and Jikook as a gimmick, I think that is simultaneously complicated but also not that deep and it’s probably a separate discussion; in short, I don’t think Bang is thinking farther than taking advantage of and promoting a popular (easier?) ship but it seems to have affected the relationship of the members involved (Disclaimer: I don’t think that all permutations and combinations of relationships between the members have a possibility of being “real”. I don’t think it’s an everyone loves everyone situation.)

Will Bang or the company try to take the credit if Taekook are outed by accident? The way they act, I feel like they are pretty confident that no such thing will happen. In the very minute chance that it does, I think they'll wash their hands of Taekook and let them fend for themselves. I don’t think they’ve done the groundwork to benefit from such a situation nor do I think they are making it easy for Taekook. The narratives put forth in In The Soop and other content do the opposite of cushioning the blow. There’s no overall consistency and it’s really hard to predict how such things will play out, so I don’t know if they have any plans centered around Taekook right now much less back when they discovered that Taekook might not be typical bandmates. 

I'm not sure what you meant by that last paragraph but why Lisa?

[heavensenthearty]

7, 17, 38 for fic writer asks :) ❤️🧡💛

I'm so sorry for taking so long to answer!! But actually I've been thinking about your ask since yesterday and I went through all my writing folder to answer properly and I totally am not functioning without the enough amount of sleep since then 😅

So, let's go:

7. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

First of, I'm proud of all my writing. Even the bad one because it is the one that has helped me to get to the where I am now in terms of development. But given that you put me to choose between my children, I couldn't decide for just one (not limited to the Zutara fandom) and I decided to put the three I'm the most proud of:

She comes back to life with a dangerously profound inhalation. Her eyes are red, her nose bleeds severely fast, I think her ears do so as well. The blood flows down to her mouth and between her lips. She tastes it. A strange awareness awakens her eyes. She screams.

She screams, and screams, and screams, extendedly, pushing her power to the peak of its force and forcing it to gain more force. Breaking one wall after the other, shredding steel, piercing iron. It’s painful to even witness, terrifying and overwhelming.

It's something from a fic I finished recently about one of my favorite book couples, Aaron Warner and Juliette Ferrars from the Shatter Me series. It's a scene from Warner's POV where he's watching Juliette inflict her power to destroy on herself.

I'm very proud of it because there are only few Warner POVs in the books, and it's already difficult to write fantasy/sci-fi and first person POV separately, imagine them together! 😣 But despite everything, I've been told I did a pretty good job capturing his feelings, and that's the best compliment I've ever received as a writer! 🤩🤩🤩

And now:

Ty had gotten himself into a problem. It was a pretty obvious deduction considering he was being cornered by an entire herd of hellhounds in a lonely, dark street alley.

He hadn’t thought his investigation of the new anomalies on the convergence points and ley lines would lead him to this, to be honest; it was supposed to be harmless enough of a mission. Finding clues, as the very much. He hadn’t expected to see action.

But now he didn’t hesitate to withdraw his sable – the weapon he had chosen to commemorate the life of his sister Livvy. If I carry it, he said to her once, to her incorporeal ghost, it will be like you still battled by my side.

It's for a one-shot I wrote for another one of my favorite book semi-official couples, Ty Blackthorn and Kit Herondale from Shadowhunter Chronicles. This is a scene from Ty's POV and I'm very, very, very proud of all my writing of Ty!! ☺️☺️ He's the first neurodiverse character about who I've written and I always put lots of care in making his autism noticeable as respectfully as I can. Besides, I like the emotion in his memory of his sister Livvy. It evokes emotion in me, the writer, and that's very difficult to achieve!

And finally...

“When Barkha gave birth to Agni, the Elemental Fire Spirit, she was gravely injured and died. It was her death what unleashed death for humans alike, and Aroon’s grief for his wife what created sadness and despair. Agni and his fire were the catalyst for impurity and evilness to enter the human world.”

The wind is hard and silent. I extinguish the flame in my hand, turn to look at Katara in the eye.

“You should stop trying to get close to me.”

She merely gazes at me for a brief second; her eyes are now made of pure, flowing water. She takes a step closer to me then, nearly brushing my chin, her breath is hot, almost burning against it.

“Why not?”

It's the scene I always talk about when I mention my Avatar!Zuko/Zutara AU! 😍😍 I'm proud of it because it's one of my first attempts at parallelisms... and besides can you believe that sexual tension?!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

17. Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

It's a bit of both: when I get a new idea for a story, I always write the beginning right away, but as I continue it, I think too much ahead for future chapters and start writing future scenes in disorder when I'm not even close to reach those points in the plot. Say, I could be writing a series and scenes for the third work when I haven't finished the first one 🤷🏽‍♀️😅

38. Talk about a review that made your day.

This one! This one right here!! I love giving long comments, but I'd never received one... until this one!!

I've to say that this is a comment that boosted my confidence as a writer in general. I never thought I would be able to inspire this level of enthusiasm, or that I'd be one of those writers for whom you overcome your reading pet peeves. And on top of everything, I've a strange sense of humor (have you noticed? 😅) so the fact that I made someone laugh with something I wrote makes me really happy 😁😁

These were all so fun to answer!! Thank you so much for the ask!! 🤗💋🤗💋

Ask about my fics!