#It was pretty good I’d give it a solid 6.5/10

[electronicgalah]

NO FUCKING WAY THEY PISSED ON THE MOON

[waterdeepthroat]

playing Veilguard, and while it’s not perfect, it’s not as bad as most of the critics say— i’d give it a solid 6.5/10 so far.

what i liked:

- character creation is great for the most part— some very good hair options with realistic physics, tattoos and scarring seems pretty good as well, and the complexion options are overall pretty varied.

- emphasis on companion questlines— early on in the game (i’m maybe 10-12 hours in at this point) there’s a lot of emphasis on companions, but it doesn’t feel forced— it feels like a natural progression of the main story and it seems to tie in well with the main themes of the game. i can understand why BioWare changed the name from Dreadwolf to Veilguard.

- landscapes/atmosphere— THE ATMOSPHERE. god, when it comes to the aesthetics of the different maps in this game, the art style works incredibly well. the game is visually stunning.

- voice pitch— not a major thing, but i thought it was a nice touch. it makes sense for my rook to have a deeper voice while still feminine, so i thought this worked quite well.

- ghilan’nain’s design is incredible.

- combat is fast-paced and engaging, and while a lot is going on at once i don’t think i ever get left behind in terms of mechanics or new abilities

criticisms:

- why are there so many american VAs?? the dalish in particular seem to suffer from this problem. strife i can understand, as iirc he joined the dalish, but bellara? it breaks immersion for me when the dalish have (with the exception of origins) had welsh and irish accents typically.

- bellara as a character frustrates me. i might do another post about her later, but her mannerisms, her voice, and her class/specialisation irk me.

- no eye or lip shape customisation in the CC.

- WHY NO DA KEEP?? it’s so fucking frustrating that it seems like the devs only care about past choices in DAI if they relate to solavellan. while i did romance solas on my first DAI playthrough, i don’t think it should be the canon/default romance, nor is it even my favourite romance in the game.

- the art style for characters isn’t my favourite, but i don’t think it’s a huge deal. i’ll probably get used to it though.

- what i do genuinely hate is the art style for the UI (ex: journal, skill tree, map, etc.). DA2 and DAI i think do this better, DAI in particular is stylised in such a beautiful way.

- might get some flak for this, but i do think a lot of the gender options are shoehorned, but only in terms of wording. the word “trans”, at least for me, really breaks immersion in the game— i think they should’ve gone the route of the forgotten realms and had human/elven words for trans, like they did in DAI with aqun-athlok.

- i don’t think taash’s questline was handled the best, though i haven’t played through it myself yet (only watched videos on youtube), so take what i say with a grain of salt.

- the skill trees rely on far too many passives, meaning a lot of levels feel pretty dead/barren

[bugstinytalks]

Ninjago Ship Thoughts

First and foremost I’m gonna tell you my head-canons for the ninjas sexualities since it’s probably gonna affect my thoughts on the ships.

Cole - Gay - the entire “dad I’m a ninja” is so fucking queercoded so that’s my reasoning.

Kai - Bi - this man primarily flirts with women but he gives strong bisexual energy and I stand by that.

Zane - Pan - I don’t feel like Zane has a strong enough grasp on gender for it to affect who he dates.

Jay - Omni - I feel like he has a preference for women but I feel in my soul that he’s at least had a crush on a guy before.

Nya - Bi - I don’t know if she’s ever had a crush on a girl but a girl has definitely had a crush on her and she would not be opposed to dating a girl.

Pixal - Pan - I feel like she has a better grasp of gender than Zane but gender doesn’t affect who she likes.

All other characters are up in the air for me. I lean towards seeing lloyd as aroace but I’m not certain. Anyway I’m with my thoughts. (These are in no particular order)

(Jaya) Jay/Nya - let’s start with a canon ship! I like how this relationship is portrayed in later seasons and they have some cute moments earlier in the series, but I definitely like there relationship post Nadakhan the best (I’ve butchered the genies name I know it) Jaya is sweet and I’m happy that Nya was given strong characterizations outside of her relationship with men overall I’d say this is a solid 8/10.

(Pixane) - Zane/Pixal - I love this ship so much, she has half his fucking heart and there both so great. Zane and Pixar are both fully independent who love each other and there so cute. I think one appeal of this ship for me is that I can see the both as romantic or platonic partners because they both mean so much to the other. Anyway love this ship 9.6/10

(Kailor) - Kai/Skylor - I love Skylor she’s super cool but this pair really only interacts once and awhile to briefly flirt before they just go there separate ways. Obviously both of them are busy so it makes sense that they don’t get a lot of time together. Kai definitely had a crush on Skylor and I think Skylor reciprocated those feelings. There cut and interesting but don’t have as much development as they need for me to be compelled to be invested. Solid 6.5/10.

(Llorumi) - Lloyd/Harumi - these two have a fascinating dynamic that I think is really fun to watch but I cannot see them as romantic partners. I know some people see them as siblings and I really don’t see them that way. And again there really interesting as a duo and while I want the pair to heal and improve there relationship I don’t really want them to date. Overall 5/10 cool duo don’t see them as romantic.

(Lloykita) - Lloyd/Akita - It’s pretty cute, I love Akita so I do hope we see her again. There relationship feels like a summer relationship they have this brief sweet period of time together and they leave on good terms unsure if they’ll ever meet again or if the other will still have feelings if they do meet again. I also really like the idea of these to being together in a queer platonic way. It’s really cute and I love both of the characters individually so it’s a pretty solid ship in my opinion. 8/10 it’s sweet.

(Conia) - Cole/Vania - it feels like a lesbian and a gay man being best friends. I love these two I think there great friends and could even see them being platonic partners but like I don’t see them doing more than that. Solid 5/10 cool pair don’t see it as romantic.

(Lava) - Cole/Kai - There so cool and I think this ship is really fun. I think that these two are both really great characters who mesh well I can totally see them dating and think it’s a really cute ship. These two are bonding over there weird ass family lives and crippling self doubt! These two are a cute pair 9/10

(Bruise) - Jay/Cole - these two are so silly and honestly this is a cute ship. I think Cole was definetley involved in Jays realization that he wasn’t straight. I think this is a cute ship but not one I have super strong feelings on 7/10

(Mudshock) - Jay/Cole/Nya - the best solution for a love triangle is polyamory. That said I wasn’t a big fan of the love triangle but in Ninjago since Cole didn’t actually seem interested in Nya, and Nya only was interested in Cole cause a matchmaking system said so. These three are definitely great friends who joke about the love triangle and hang out but I don’t know that it’s my favorite ship. 6.7/10 Cute but not great.

(Polyninja) - Jay/Cole/Kai/Zane - I think this is probably one of the greatest things I have ever seen. All of these characters are so close and care for each other so much. Together they can help each other grow and thrive. It’s really an awesome ship solid 10/10

There are lots of other ships I will talk about but I’m supposed to be doing my summer class final so I’ve gotta go try to be responsible. Anyway have a good day/night I love seeing comments so say hi if you’d like to :D

[anyways-wonderwall]

Album of the Week #68

Planet Her

(2021)

by Doja Cat

Overall Rating: 6.5/10

TL;DR: Probably an objectively good album, I’m just tired. Tired of hearing these singles that were drilled into my head, tired on the stupid one-liners, tired of the trap snare. While she has a fantastic singing voice and seems to be having fun, I’m too damn tired to have the enthusiasm rub off on me. 

(You know, I'll give her this, that is a badass album cover 10/10)

Every week i somehow get busier. When will it end

Overall Thoughts

As her albums become more refined, focused, and professional, her intent of writing about sex and womanhood becomes clearer. I think that Robert Christgau’s description of writing sex songs instead of love songs fits even more with this album. Every duet is about sex, every rap mentions it, even “Kiss Me More” which sounds like a lighthearted love song is incredibly graphic once you listen to the lyrics. I’m not saying this is a bad thing at all, it’s just fascinating to hear a whole album that has pop woven through it not mention love (I wonder what boomer Robert Christgau has to say about that). 

“Woman” starts the album off with a sensual tone and is I think the most creative and distinct song on the album. The rest kind of blend together and I think how overplayed some of them were on the radio ruined a few of them for me. I don’t think many of the songs offered anything unique or especially good, with a mix of predictable slow songs and rap songs that offer your standard sound board of effects and beats. The only real variation you’ll get is in a sometimes really good chorus or baseline, as she also offers about the same flow in every song. I think most of the album (especially “Naked” and “Need to Know”) fall into the category of “songs I’d dance to at a club and enjoy at the time but never think about again.” You need songs like that in your life, but that also means that I don’t have much of a desire to listen to this album in full again. 

In listening to her whole discography I’ve found that the one thing that Doja Cat lacks is being a good writer. Okay that sounds really harsh but I think her messages and themes are great, her ideas are solid and complex, she’s just really bad at writing well crafted, smart, and good lyrics. Often they’re stupid enough to border on funny which was fine in her early days but as she wants to be taken more and more seriously it just doesn’t really work. Often lines don’t rhyme or barely rhyme, the word play is stupid (“square like Madison”??? That’s dumb as hell), and when thing do flow and rhyme it feels like gibberish. I hope she gets better soon because if you’re gonna start billing yourself as a rapper (like she is in her newest album) you at least have to be able to write. Sure you can say the lines, but are they worth saying?

Part of me wonders if I’m especially harsh on this album because pretty much every song that was a single when this came out was so overplayed that it makes me genuinely angry to here. “Get Into It (Yuh)” is one of my least favorite songs of all time tbh, and if I have to hear that weird bird owl sound effect one more time I’m going to throw my headphones into the road. “You Right” is probably a good song objectively but I just find myself wanting to turn it off because its so boring to me, and the only song (other than “Woman”) that I find myself coming back to is “Kiss Me More.” 

You know, to end this review on a good note let’s talk about that song for a bit. It’s honestly perfect. I’ve had it stuck in my head for the past week but not in a dreadful way, in a “nodding my head and humming while doing the dishes” kind of way. The baseline is perfect, all the guitar parts are wonderfully catchy, SZA is fantastic in it, and its the perfect length. I’m glad the album ended with that song because I was at least left with a good taste in my mouth. 

Next week's review: Scarlet (2023) by Doja Cat

[starfire-s]

here’s a list of the best, mediocre and worst kdramas i watched in 2020

no one asked for this but it’s happening because i have thoughts (also all opinions are my own if you disagree then get well soon i guess... no i’m kidding make your own posts about it don’t hate me please) ahsjsj anyways click to read a lengthy post and if you actually read the whole thing then thank you i hope you enjoy this wild ride! 

THE BEST KDRAMAS -

mystic pop up bar - this show had everything i ask from a kdrama literally i can name it all found family (to real family), well thought out characters, a mystery plot, special effects, soft romances that were well written, a happy ending! no show in 2020 even comes close to how good this one was! the writers literally guided you throughout the whole thing so you could come up with theories and didn’t do a ‘aha! gotcha’ thing where they want to prove the audience wrong but they wanted us to be right and satisfied! the worst part about the drama is that it’s still so underrated and people just brush it off as some random fantasy show but it’s so much more than that! 1000/10

flower of evil - who doesn’t want to see lee joon gi being the son of a serial killer, living with the name of a man who is in a coma, and hiding his real identity from his wife who is a detective? this show constantly had me at the edge of my seat on a weekly basis so the emotions i went through while watching this are unparalleled! the writers also did such a good job on writing a coherent story that made sense and tied up all the plot points in the end. just a really satisfying show to watch! 10/10

where your eyes linger - i literally bought a $8 viki pass to watch this show so it should tell you everything you need to know about how i feel ahsjsj the episodes were 10 minutes long but we got a good story with well written characters who got character development in a total of 80 minutes it’s insane! honestly it’s still hard to believe this show had rookie actors because they were just so emotive that you could feel all the happiness, sadness, yearning and pining! probably one of my fave kdramas this year because of the acting that i always constantly rewatch! would recommend 10/10

crash landing on you - okay so this drama was actually released on my birthday last year and it was a time in my life when i was going through a lot so maybe it’s the comfort this show provided me through that time this is why i have such a soft spot for it? like the romance was good, it was funny, there was found family, the nk soldiers were all softies, there were strong female leads, soft male leads!!! ahh!! no other show on this list made me think about the unification of south korea and north korea irl because i wanted se ri and jeong hyeok to be together 4ever! but the only issue i had with this show was the ending they gave seung jun if they didn’t do that i’d give this show a 10/10 but just for that they get a 9/10

psycho but it’s okay - this was one of those shows where you’re literally like ‘wow everyone here needs therapy’ but this show was amazing i loved the story telling and how each episode related to children’s book/fairytales! the writers also did a good job with how carefully they talked about mental health in depth without villainising their characters but actually tried to make the audience understand why they were this way which included all the side characters too who had a well thought out story in each episode! also the dynamic between moon young, kang tae and sang tae was everything to me the actors all did an amazing job portraying their characters, it truly was a healing drama. the only thing i didn’t like about this show was the whole plastic surgery plot with the mother like that was very far fetched but it provided drama so i’ll let it slide because the rest was amazing. this show is a solid 8.5/10

18 again - another underrated gem! who would’ve thought a remake of that zac efron movie could be this good!! lee do hyun stole this show for sure the way he portrayed his character and gave heart eyes to his kids (when he’s only 25 irl was the best thing i saw this year ahsjs) i loved the family dynamics in this show, i loved how it talked about what it’s like to be young parents and how society still think it’s taboo to be divorced! it’s a show that makes you laugh and cry at the same time and that’s why everyone should watch it! however, the biggest clown thing this show did to me though was that i got sls for the first time while watching a kdrama... hwang in yeop if u’re reading this i love u and u deserved better 🤡 that aside this show was a 8/10

itaewon class - i actually didn’t watch this drama as it was airing because i thought i wouldn’t enjoy the plot but when i watched it i binged the whole thing in 2 days and my biggest regret is i didn’t watch it sooner! everyone knows i have a soft spot for park seo joon since he’s my favourite actor i’ve literally watched all his dramas like he could star in the trashiest drama out there and i’d still watch it and be like wow (looking at she was pretty 👀) this show aside from the acting had one of the best revenge plots in a kdrama! just watching a character realistically hustle his way to reach the top while fighting the corrupt man whose son killed his father was so so satisfying to watch! however, the love triangle in this show was questionable idk what they were trying to do with that but it personally annoyed me! but still i’ll give this show a 7.5/10 because i enjoyed it a lot!

do you like brahms? - kim min jae and park eun bin.. that’s all you need to know about why this is a good kdrama! i’m usually not a big fan of melodramas and everyone knows i prefer rom coms but this show was just so perfectly melo that i loved all the angst and pain we got!! also just watching two introverted people awkwardly fall in love was amazing! the characters story arcs were also handled pretty well with song ah finally learning to speak up for herself and joon young learning to express how he truly feels! but... the love square? was probably the most annoying thing the rest in my opinion was nicely done! i know people had mixed feelings about the ending but i loved that after all the pain joon young and song ah went through they got a happy ending together! 7/10

find me in your memory - okay this show started off very slow and it was confusing at the start but as it progressed everything in the plot started to fall into place! i mean this show really took opposites attract to a new level where the male lead could remember every single detail from his life but the female lead had to forget some of her traumatic memories to help her cope with her life! they were also tied together through a mutual character who was a big part of their lives in a different way! just an interesting melodrama with interesting characters i liked it! and moon ga young... i love you queen!!! 7/10

THE MEDIOCRE KDRAMAS -

more than friends - was the storytelling in this show groundbreaking? no. was the acting decent? yes. also probably the main reason i stuck with this show until the end! i think we can all agree lee soo had the best character development on this show he started off as a bad boy who wore one ear stud to actually becoming a well liked character... who else did it like him? no one. also the chemistry between the mains was 🔥 but the second male lead was so annoying is there a opposite word for second lead syndrome because i had that for sure! i think the best part about this show was the people i watched it with on here... shoutout to the five of us ahsjsj also this show introduced me to a talented actor/singer like ong seong wu (y’all know my kpop knowledge is nonexistent so no i didn’t know he was in a band called wanna one) all in all a predictable show but i had fun watching it so 6.5/10

tale of the nine tailed - i didn’t actually watch this show i watched it through gifs and instagram posts ahsjsjs so am i qualified to talk about my opinion definitely no... will I talk about it anyways yes lmao. lee rang deserved better that’s all goodbye and take care. 5.5/10

start up - probably one of the most awaited opinions. y’all thought this would be in the worst kdramas section but i decided to give this show some rights. the show started off strong, lost it’s way after episode 6 and then the last episode gave me what i wanted so i have mixed feelings. the writing was not the best i think we can all agree, love triangle as a plot device? wow so groundbreaking 🤡 the characters on the other hand... i loved every single one of them i mean ship wars? i don’t know her. the show had a lot of potential that was wasted but we also got some cute moments between the characters so there was really no winning or losing with this show? but in all honesty you can’t put a talented cast together like this and then just decide to give the audience a mediocre plot but the writers did exactly that! i think i can redirect y’all to my ‘crimes this show committed’ post for a in-depth analysis. lastly nam do san was a GOOD and REFRESHING male lead and ji pyeong was also a GOOD and FUN second male lead!!! this show gave me the ugliest ship war ever that i was transported back to my high school tvd days so thank you for that!! but the cast was loveable and all had a lot of chemistry together so here’s a 5/10 maybe that's too generous but... i think the reason why i didn't enjoy watching this show as much was definitely because of the tag on here lmao

THE WORST KDRAMAS -

the king eternal monarch - i miss clowning this show so much. the amount of braincells i lost while trying to understand this plot... i should be compensated by the writers. however, woo do hwan was a treat to look at on a weekly basis... however the writers kept decreasing his screen time even though he had a dual role... make it make sense? and i cannot comment on the plot of this show because i still don’t understand anything? also in my opinion tae eul and lee gon were the most bland couple of 2020, there was no chemistry between them and there was just a random kiss in episode 5 and they randomly said i love you... where was the development? also lee gon was soooo boring and such a one dimensional male lead! literally all the side characters were so much more interesting and the cast was good... but this plot. 2/10

do do sol sol la la sol - i wanna fight the writer who decided that the plot twist on the show would be that jun is a minor? i had no expectations from this show but it looked cute and nonsensical but that plot twist made me run the other way so fast that i never looked back! just because jun is a boy they really thought this would be excused like lmao we all have critical thinking skills???? the clown behaviour. a solid 1/10

record of youth - i hate this show so much. imagine not utilising park so dam who just starred in the biggest oscar winning movie to her full potential. imagine just making her a love interest to park bo gum’s character in the year 2020. i watched it up until episode 6 and i kept waiting for her character to get development... but it never happened so i dropped this show. also this show featured the MOST useless love triangle i have ever seen in my life like what was the point? also park bo gum’s characters family was straight up annoying (minus the grandpa) but they got so much screen time like that should’ve been given to park so dam... also villainising a gay side character for no reason at all in the year 2020? this show was a waste of my time i want the 6 hours i spent watching this back. -100/10 

backstreet rookie - i watched one episode of this and literally wanted to rip my eyeballs out of my head. idk what ji chang wook was thinking when he signed this drama i think he lost his ability to read because that's the only reasonable explanation for why he chose to star in such a dumpster fire show! this show had a racist character... had a high schooler kiss an adult... sexist jokes... just the worst things you can think of in a drama... this show had it. i still can’t believe so many people watched this show to the point where it had better ratings than pbio... really made me question everyone’s taste? but sorry can’t relate my taste is excellent so here’s the rating this show actually deserves -1000/10

if you made it this far... thank you for reading. let’s continue to love some kdramas together and get clowned by others in 2021! looking forward to it 😅

[fvckme-sir]

husband rating: hakkai

with @bvnnichuu

b:for kai i’ll say his passion is a 6.5/10

p: i think its at least a 8-9 because we see him join the gang that his brother is in just for takemichi to be safe  so if he's that willing just for his friends, imagine how passionate he'd be as a partner\

b: oh true true

p : but i also feel like he may have trouble expressing it because his broher is a nutcase and something tells me that his brother is super against emotional expression yknow so he may struggle a teensey bit

b: oh will say though i gave him the 6.5 because he kinda gives up easy and wants to keep the peace a lot (which i totally understand giving his growing up situation)

b: ( ilike it takes a lot of work for him to get comfortable to show his true true self and not the goofy personality he puts on so ppl think he’s okay :((

p: YEAH exactly, because he's so secure in his sense of style so he seems so sure of himself but he really isnt because he just cant ask for support thanks to his shitty brother

b: yeah :(( so it’s probably very hard for him to show true emotions bc of fear and putting up walls

p: i feel like once when he started dyin his hair n stuff he like scared a kid once and he had a realization as to how he just does not want to be like that and so he started pushing himself more

p: like the scar and stuff:(

b: oh yeah

b: i also just had a thought and i’m gonna cry

p: share the thought<3

b: in one of the timelines he persues a career and i really see that as his outlet to finally express himself and be happy, like truly happy. and having someone in a similar field is comforting to him in a way ya know 

p: househusband ability?

b:4/10

p:pfft- that was a STRAIGHT UP no

b: he is the baby of his family and i’m the oldest out of mine he will try but it’s not good

p: oh yeah true:( you'd spoil him

b: “bunni wait how do i do this? i need some help ”

p: i dont think he has a single househusbandly bone in his body

b:he doesn’t:

b:goes to taka chan

b: charm

p: i think he's a solid 7 on charm

b: i’d say 7.5

p: i think he has a tendency to be smug but in like a cute way

b; but his humor is in his charm and that’s like

b: a huge thing for me

b: gotta make me laugh

p: aww YEAH he knows how to make people laugh n thats one of the things that was a turning point for him once he decided he wanted to change

b: like he’s also a very fun, sweet guy too so

b: also he has me laughing to the point where i’m crying and my cheeks hurt

b: and i do that run away thing

p: nothing makes him happier

p: so, for dick rating

b: so his dick is really pretty

p: i feel like he’s a grower

b: YES

p: YEAH he does have a pretty dick

p: keeps it completely shaved

b: i can see him with a bit of a happy trail

p: ACTUALLY WAIT YEAH

p: but it’s shaved short

b: a slight v bc he’s beeeeeeg

b: YES b: does he have foreskin?

p: hmmm

P: i think so

b: i’m on the fence

p:actually wait no he doesn’t

P: i’m so lost I dunno

b: I DUNNO EITHERRRR

P: LETS JUST SKIP THIS AAAA

b: but i do know his head is cra- OK p: his head is what?

b: crazy sensitive

p: OHH  yeah 1000%

p: next: kinks!

b: i feel like he’s a try it once kinda guy

p: yeah me too

p: i think his favorites though are overstim, bondage, crying, spit and he likes risky places

b:YES

b: and

b: he loves the daddy kink bc he feels like he has control

b:likes when it’s cooed at him too

p: oh my GOD

p: WAIT p: COCK / BODY WORSHIP

b: YES

b: giving AND RECIEVING

p: do you think he prefers giving or receiving in general?

p: i feel like its obvious

p: giving

b: i’d say giving but falls apart when receives

p:he’s like super shy bc all the attention’s on him

p: alright bun what do you think gets hakkai goin?

b: he really like when his back gets rubbed

p: i feel like if you touch him in certain spots its a guarantee hard on

b: YES

p: a certain spot on his thigh, the area between his neck and shoulder

b: his jaw too

p: and behind his ear

b; omg i’d really set him off

b: i always rub his ears when i’m bored

p:do you think he’s more dom, sub or comfortable with both?

p: i think he’s a switch with a slight dom lean

b: i feel like he has to be a dom but yeah he’s definitely a switch

[radramblog]

Album Discussion- Shinjuku Mad

Usually on a Tuesday I like to take my time with a blog post. Listen to a full album, do a little research, put some real effort into it.

Unfortunately, time is not my ally today. So I kinda have to do one that’s a bit easier- in this case, I think I’d rather go after one of the ones that’s already on my phone, in case I have to do this on the bus or something.

(wait, I drove in today…)

Today we’re going to go into a self-titled album that is somehow not the artist’s debut. Rather, Shinjuku Mad is the second of two albums released under the name- the reason I specify as such is that one of the two (and later, the vocalist would help out again) members would go on to relative fame under a different name- Vaportrap pioneer Blank Banshee.

Peering into this album is like looking at a beta version of what was to come. It’s very much a different genre, an IDM album that completely predates Vaporwave’s explosion of popularity and Blank Banshee’s seminal album, Blank Banshee 0. It’s a solid enough album in addition to this, but it’s kind of hard to talk about seeing as there’s basically nobody who knows about Shinjuku Mad that didn’t learn about it through Blank Banshee. As such, expect a lot of BB coming up in this post.

Also a block of words, because no music videos exist for this at all. It’s one of those obscure albums.

This album opens on Cure for Fear. It’s one of those introductory tracks you often get in albums, at about a minute and a half long, with very reverb-y percussion and vocals and an almost ethereal haze of noise. It’s got these chimes that occasionally come up, reminiscent of some of the tracks from the AKIRA soundtrack, but beyond that there’s not a huge amount going on here. It does introduce a problem, however, one which we’ll get to later. It’ll be pretty evident if you’re listening along, though.

Track 2: Kowloon. I really did forget how short a lot of these songs were, with this being 2:13- the whole 10-track album clocks in at under half an hour. There’s a mix of drum machine and hollow wood percussion on this track that gives it a really interesting sort of feel, and some of the effects on the vocals feel extremely vaporwave- it’s no surprise that the dude behind this went on into that genre. Here’s where I can’t help but hammer on that issue I mentioned earlier, though.

The vocals on this album are quite weak. I know they’re very much trying to be ethereal, the reverb and falsetto make that much clear, and that style very much suits the instrumentation. But it just doesn’t sound great. It kinda comes and goes, but by and large I’d label them as subpar. I don’t really think it’s the fault of the performance either, it’s not like the bloke is missing his lines or mumbling more than is necessary for the album’s aesthetic, but there’s just something about them. They might be too loud in the mix for this kind of genre? I’m not 100% sure.

Resistor, the third track, is the best known song from this album by an order of magnitude. I mean that quite literally, as the track as over 540,000 monthly listens on Spotify as compared to Kowloon’s 32000. It’s kind of shocking, I mean for such an obscure album with zero singles, why is this of all tracks the one people suddenly latched onto?

As it turns out, it’s because again of the artist’s future work as Blank Banshee. Resistor would be reworked into one of the more popular tracks from BB0, Dreamcast, and it would appear that people got curious as to what the source was.

The thing is, aside from sharing a vocal performance, the tracks are very different. As it is, Resistor is a much faster track than the previous, driven by this fast percussion and bassline, making for a genuinely solid exercise track of all things (I say from experience). It’s got a fun little synth solo in the middle, the vocals are pretty solid (aside from like right at the end of the last chorus, holy shit), and the song’s coda and outro are a fun little bit of controlled chaos. I’d put Resistor as one of the better tracks on the album, is what I’m saying.

I’m going to do something I haven’t done in a while when discussing music on this blog- I’m going to jump through a few things. As much as I like this album, the songs aren’t nearly interesting enough to justify a song-by-song breakdown. I think if you listen to Resistor and like it, it’s probably worth chucking on the rest of the album- it is, again, less than half an hour long. But its an album where it’s more valuable on a meta level than it is sonically.

Shinjuku Mad as an album feels a lot like a hybrid between older IDM trends and the synth/vaporwave elements that would become popularised in the 2010s. There’s also tracks like Inductor, which border on rock songs with the power behind that bassline and percussion- in general much of the instrumentation is cleaner than you’d expect from an artist like this, especially considering how muddied much of the vocals get. There is a real focus on the vocals, which as I’ve discussed is a weakness of the album, but I do think it’s possible to look past that issue. There’s some really fun synth lines, some excellent percussion, and real aesthetic. Songs like Human Wave Attack feel stark and lonely, notes echoing into the void, which ironically is not at all like Track 4, Void- with synths and vocals disguising a guitar and drum line that feels extremely garage band. As in, the concept, not the program. Singularity is a song that feels again predictive of Blank Banshee’s future work, a low, slow synth track reminiscent of BB songs like Hyper Object or Metamaterial.

There are some genuine gems on here in addition to Resistor, though. City of No Tomorrow, the eighth song, has got to be one of my favourites- somehow, despite featuring none of the instrumentation typical of the genre, it’s extremely cyberpunk, a sense of struggle and futility resonant through the track. It’s the one song on the album I listen to regularly, getting myself lost in the groove of the bass and tapping my foot along to the percussion. It’s just really good, man.

If this isn’t your first time encountering Shinjuku Mad, reading this might cause you to go back and have another listen, upon which you may notice a few somethings missing. I don’t expect that to be the case for literally anyone reading this…but I needed a segue. This is because, upon the reintegration of Shinjuku Mad and its predecessor Organic Thoughts from the Synthetic Mind into Hologram Bay’s catalogue for the 2019 reissue, two songs were cut, likely for fears of legal issues regarding sampling. The version of this album that I remember has those tracks!

Those songs are Negatives (formerly track 6) and Neon Exodus (formerly track 12). Negatives is another one that’d show up as a Blank Banshee track (in this case, Gunshots), and is actually really solid? Like it integrates a raid siren into the instrumentation without having it sound weird, out of place, or, well, alarming. Neon Exodus is…wow I just don’t know this track at all. It’s fuckin aesthetic though. Welcome to this spontaneous live-reaction, I guess. I recognize the sample this is built around (and thereby why it isn’t on the album anymore) but I cannot name it for the life of me. It’s, uh, interesting. I dunno, 6.5/10?

Anyway, part of the reason I bring this up is that before I want to close this out I have some complaining to do. Said 2019 reissue was something I tracked at the time, and noticed both SM albums were releasing on Vinyl, Cassette (because, you know, nerds), and digitally. But not CD. I threw an email at the website about it, and they did eventually respond (it genuinely took like two months though), but not in the positive. The reissue had no plans to include a CD, unlike all three previous Blank Banshee albums.

But the original 2010 version of the album, along with a few slight differences in songs and in album order, does have a CD release, albeit an extremely limited one, according to Discogs. These CDs have to exist, they’re now listed on the new Shinjuku Mad website. Apparently one sold 6 months ago through Discogs. I need to find a copy, though considering on that site 7 people list it as owned and 72 (including myself) list it as wanted, it’s probably not going to happen.

And that, ultimately, is Shinjuku Mad. It’s a very odd piece of history as far as vaporwave goes, considering it’s both a prototype and also something completely, utterly different. The album is pretty decent on its own, but not mindblowing, and something you could probably live without. There are like two tracks (three if you include Negatives) that are 100% worth it, but the rest are skippable. Which is a shame, but mediocre music has to exist somewhere, right?

That I apparently haven’t discussed Blank Banshee on this blog before (aside from when I was talking about Vaperror) is actually kind of shocking. I suppose, then, that there might be some lacking context. I probably will have to do that at some point, though I probably won’t do BB0 because I like picking the hipster options- so either BB1 or MEGA. Metamorphosis didn’t really pique my interest, and I somehow missed GAIA existing in the first place and still haven’t listened to it. So if you’re interested in seeing me ramble over some of that, I’ll see you then. I mean, it’ll still happen if you aren’t interested, but nobody’s going to make you read it.

Or am I…?

[manicdragondreamgirl]

I haven’t had chemistry since like 2008, and I’m also an idiot who likes to make my friends upset, so I rated the periodic table in order to tilt my friends:

Hydrogen - this is like your childhood friend who has always been with you more or less and always will be down to get a drink and chill even tho you haven’t spoken in years. Solid bro imo 7.5/10

Helium - always down for a good time, even if probably created Alvin and the Chipmunks which in some places is considered a war crime. 4/10

Lithium - Gives me bitchy vibes and is flammable as fuck if I remember. Skinny bitch with an attitude 3/10

Beryllium - idk this sounds like a sailor moon villain lol for that it can have a 6/10

Boron - more like BORONG amirite ha ha wait no seriously I have no idea lol 5/10 clean neutral rating

Carbon - *screaming* 2/10 I will not be taking questions

Nitrogen - cool cool cool tight tight tight 9/10 Nitrogen just is the cool hot chick you wish you were

Oxygen - kid who takes up all the glory for the group project even tho you did all the work, 4/10 for natural charisma

Fluorine - lol what are you knockoff chlorine lmfao bitch 3/10 reminds me of the dentist

Neon - I can vibe with this boy for his contributions to signs which cause my eyes to scream 8/10 modernized Art Deco thanks you

Sodium - 10/10 this is me and I won’t be taking questions next element

Magnesium - magnesium is a close relative of magnificent and therefore I think the case is closed folks 9/10

Aluminum - 10/10 for providing a home to my Diet Coke addiction I’d be dead without you

Silicon - 6.9/10 :smirk:

Phosphorous - This has a very soundly name and it’s welcome to do that but idk, not a fan, seems like he’d be smelly, 2/10

Sulfur - 1/10 pretty sure that dog farts are purely comprised of this and as such if I was leaving negative ratings I would

Chlorine - 7.8/10 for being in pools so we could swim without brain eating amoeba in the south you a champ

Argon - he seems like a nerd jk this guy has a good color 9/10 for just being himself

Potassium - I hate bananas and this word gives me the physical sensation of biting into one but only by thinking of abstract letters and making them into something which we can nutrientise from bananas and to me that shit is bananas, b a n a n a s — 3/10 for making me sing hollaback girl thru adhd word association

Calcium - hm my brain went to mega milk so you get a 2/10 today bud I don’t make the rules

Scandium - pretty sure this is fake lol what’s next faxdium, e-Mailite and copinium? 5/10

Titanium - this song’s a banger and also is the only thing that lets me wear earrings 10/10

Vanadium - if your erection lasts for longer than like idk it’s supposed to then don’t take vanadium wait what do you mean it’s not an ED treatment 4/10

Chromium - decent bloke shame the browser eats all your memory 5/10

Manganese - if a weeb tries to tell me how to pronounce mayonnaise one more time... 1/10

Iron - excellent tool against the fey, in your blood, what a bro, 10/10 this bitch slaps

Cobalt - has a powerful energy; I respect him. 8/10

Nickel - if I had a nickel for every time someone made this joke lol 5/10 he’s doing his best

Copper - taste bad 3/10

Zinc - isn’t that the dude in the green tunic and white tights who saves premcess Lelda or something lol 7/10 those games are good

Gallium - seems like a prick 4/10

Germanium - sounds like a child pronouncing geraniums which are superior 3/10

Arsenic - bad vibes coach 1/10

Selenium - isn’t this just sailor moon lol 10/10 love this bitch

Bromine - farmine wherever you aremine - 9/10 I love a good bro

Krypton - he’s okay I guess 5/10

Rubidium - yet another Steven universe villain who will be redeemed I imagine 4/10 seems a bit dull

Strontium - I feel nothing when I see this lad’s name and that seems like a shame 1/10 I don’t like it

Yttrium - this is an atrium in Yharnam, or something 8/10 would love to sit in one and make contact with higher beings

Zirconium - oh wait THIS is the sailor moon villain from the dead moon circus! 9/10 I enjoyed that arc

Niobium - seems sassy, I like that in an element 7/10

Molybdenum - I hate this one, rancid. 1/10 for making me have flashbacks to difficult Ancient Greek vocabulary there is no fucking way that sound combination is anything but Beta and Delta borking and then Latin being like oh imma steal that

Technetium - 6/10 decent name but seems a bit forced

Ruthenium - 5/10 kindly old lady element I guess lol

Rhodium - 10/10 this ain’t my first rhodium babee this lad has good vibes what a name what a king

Palladium - 10/10 for making me think of paladins

Silver - 12/10 I’m breaking the rules for this silver is the best it is so cool and also it is the other best tool for dealing with supernatural creatures when iron has failed you highly suggest Even if I am extremely allergic to it going into my ears...wait hold on

Cadmium - 2/10 sounds like a total douche

Indium - 8/10, i just think it’s independent and neat

Tin - 10/10 good ear sounds when involving rain and roof shapes and automatically reminds me of Nora Jones’s come away with me album which is also 10/10

Antimony - 7/10 decent protagonist good name all around seems rad

Tellurium - tell ur mom what? That’s so early 2010s league of legends humor bro 2.5/10

Iodine - strikes fear in my soul from having it poured on my wounds but this is why I have more pain tolerance than god 5.3/10

Xenon - I think this is a declension of Xena warrior princess which is a win in my eyes, 8/10

Caesium - kind of has a cunty Latin name, 4.5/10

Barium - yeah boss, bury’im! 7.5/10 I love a good mobster gag

Lanthanum - A bit pretentious on the Tolkien spectrum sorry bud 3/10 sounds like you’d be the dickwad elf everyone hates

Cerium - 6.5/10 I like this one, gives me a clean vibe

Praseodymium - the fuck who sneezed all their alphabet soup onto the paperwork and called it an element Christ we can’t keep doing this 1.5/10

Neodymium - oh my god what did I just say 1/10

Promethium - thank Christ we’re back to greek 9/10 Prometheus was a Chad I could get behind

Samarium - 5/10 gives me boring wizard vibes

Europium - 4.5/10 don’t rename opium chrissake can’t take these nerds anywhere

Gadolinium - 5/10 it’s a starship knockoff but it’s trying to be bold with the G sound

Terbium - 2/10 I don’t vibe with this one

Dysprosium - sounds like an antidepressant that has a lot of shitty side effects 3/10

Holmium - sounds like someone anxious asking their beloved to hold them 8/10 I like hurt/comfort fics

Erbium - you can’t just describe something as herby you daft bastard 2/10

Thulium - sounds like a spell I like it 8.5/10

Ytterbium - macguffin in a shite sci-fi show that gets highly overrated because BBC produced it and superwholock stans emerge and go utterly feral 1/10

Lutetium - bards are an element I agree 10/10

Hafnium - sounds like a river (my dog) sound and has a cute vibe, I’d offer it head pats 7/10

Tantalum - noooo you can’t be sad yuor so sexe haha 6.9/10 tantalizing

Tungsten - 10/10 this is a lad with history

Rhenium - 5.5/10 it’s ok

Osmium - 4/10 I wasn’t a big wizard of oz fan

Iridium - 9/10 sounds like iridescent and that’s in my top 10 favorite words and concepts

Platinum - 10/10 best Pokémon game

Gold - 7.9/10 all that glitters and all but it’s still pretty on some people, silver is better tho

Mercury - yikes 8/10 so it doesn’t kill me

Thallium - sounds like the brother character in a ps4 exclusive western rpg that oddly falls under the radar in terms of reviews and gets shafted at awards for no reason 7/10 I’ll support you tho

Lead - 2/10 that’s gonna be a no from me dawg pretty sure I still have lead in my hands from stabbing myself with my mechanical pencils

Bismuth - 6/10 sounds good in mouth and reminds me of biscuits for some reason, I’ll take it

Polonium - to thine own self be true so stop trying to act like the arts don’t influence science jk pretty sure this is named for Poland but hey that’s where we get the Witcher so you get a pass 6/10

Astatine - 1/10 I don’t even know what you are

Radon - 7/10 this motherfucker knows his shit and how to party, rad is right

Francium - I bring you francium...and I bring you myrdurdium... 7/10 for a good vine

Radium - killed the video star probably 9/10 I can get behind her

Actinium - as opposed to passtinium I prefer actinium in the voice of writing 8/10

Thorium - overrated Norse god 5/10 because lightning is still cool

Protactinum - sounds like some pretentious condom brand 4/10 wouldn’t do it with a dude who bought these

Uranium - I always thought she was a hot sailor scout 10/10

Neptunium - same for her I knew they weren’t cousins you couldn’t lie to me 4kids 10/10

Plutonium - sounds like a macguffin unfortunately 5/10

Americium - I read this with a pivotal letter missing and nearly died, 7/10 for the laugh

Curium - 10/10 gives me Curie vibes and also reminds me of curiosity which reminds me of—[old yellered before the association could set in]

Berkelium - what I shout when I want Burke (fam dog) to slaughter innocents and raze territories 2/10 world was not meant to know his commands

Californium - 1/10 California is cool with geography but probs could stand to chill with the ego sorry to my friends in Cali

Einsteinium - 6/10 it’s alright but we’re really running out of ideas huh

Fermium - 3/10 this one is porny

Mendelevium - 1/10 my brain didn’t like parsing this and I stand by my earlier statement of running out of good names

Nobelium - 0/10 you didn’t name any noble gases this cowards this gas can’t be a noble oh wait it’s NOBEL I take it back 5/10 seems an alright chap

Lawrencium - fear the old blood my sorry dead hunter’s ass I’ll never get back my life from the hours I spent trying to beat this lava shitting bastard 2/10 for being a boss who eats Taco Bell specifically before being challenged to have fresh lava shit with which to punish you for having the audacity to exist in his space

Rutherfordium - my god what a snob 4.2/10 I respect him a little but only because he sounds like a right lad

Dubnium - DROP THE BASS 10/10

Seoborgium - not sure about this one but it can have a 7/10

Bohrium - as an American English speaker this sound combination makes my pathetic throat become a black hole as I try to properly create the sound of it 10/10 I love when my body becomes a massive void in the universe

Hassium - lazy 2/10

Elements 109-118 can go fuck themselves I hate them all, collective 6.66/10 for their general demonic vibe

[varusai]

who do you think is the most dateable dark matter thief?? i know you have an opinion and i need to hear it

sorry for the late response anon i honestly had to think abt this one for a few days lmao, but yeah i have opinions. below the cut bc fr i have opinions, all of them have major pros and cons (based on my characterization at least) and really i just have to break it down for u

Boros, everyones obvious first choice, but certainly not mine.

Pros: rich, tall, pretty, fun af, passionate, will kill for you np, give you anything you want, literally anything.

cons: has a god complex, doesnt respect you, not his number one priority at all, will forget about you once its not interesting for him anymore, probably argumentative/combative af, is very very smart and has no problem manipulating you in all the worst ways, is very entitled so he will never feel bad about anything, cant win arguments either bc he’ll want to settle it with combat, will get offended over little things just to argue bc he thinks thats fun

this is a relationship you’d get into if you literally have nothing to lose and dont care about your mental health. like hes hot but this shit would be toxic af and he will ruin your life and leave you to go fuck around and fight someone on the other side of the universe. this will be the best of times and the worst of times for you and you will never be the same afterward mentally or emotionally. the only way i would even consider it is if i lost my damn mind. The only way a relationship with him would ever work long term is if you were physically stronger than him and were capable of putting him in his place OR you were smart enough, suicidal enough, and interesting enough to him to engage in some psychological warfare and reject him if he asked you. Make him chase you for years, say yes, then decide that /he’s/ boring /you/ and leave him for another member of the squad to just destroy their established hierarchy and humble him to the point that he’s obsessed with you.

i dont have the energy for all that, so i’ll just smash and pass.

0/10 completely undateable

Geryuganshoop, also a probable second choice for many:

pros: cute, nice, tentacle alien (obviously), will respect you np, will also give you anything you want, not antagonistic at all, telepathic communication so no risk of miscommunication, emotionally intelligent and available, loyal to a fault,

cons: horrible boss/best friend that you will have to listen to him vent about for at least 3 hours a day, complete yes man as well so he will not tell boros no or cut him off and you will be stuck dealing with this no matter what, severely mentally ill and wont go to therapy bc he thinks hes handling it well, workaholic, needs a lot, and i mean A LOT of attention

this relationship would be great if not for boros lol. boros sabotages his social and romantic life but geryu has been friends with him too long to either cut him off or establish boundaries. he has no backbone (figuratively and literally) and wouldnt even consider it. he’ll ignore you in favor of his job too, to a massive degree. also i think that while the telepathic communication would be a major plus in most cases, here i feel like i’d have no less than 16 different, never before seen on earth, mental illnesses projected right into my brain just from being within a certain radius of him.

im already fucked up enough in that sense so pass unfortunately.

it would be a yes without boros in the picture tho lmao

so prob like 4/10 iffy datablillity, 1 level increase with each decade of therapy he gets tho so a lot of potential :D

Groribas, my fav girl:

pros: straightforward, realistic, very clear expectations, will not fuck around with you whatsoever like there is no mind games or anything here, will kill for you, rich and non materialistic so she’ll basically just let you do whatever with her money since she doesn t care about it, cares about her job but like...a normal amount. she absolutely has a good work/life balance, highly organized so she will not forget important dates, loyal af and will defend your honor under any circumstances, mean but in a funny way, a ton of fun to hang out with if you’re into that, no eyes so i dont have to worry abt eye contact ever

cons: extremely high expectations, like exhaustingly high, and not even a bit of flexibility there, if you dont meet the cut its a no, she’ll let you know and leave same day, she will also bully you, you need a thick skin and great sense of humor to survive, bad at feelings if you need emotional support???? go elsewhere, shes mega emotionally unavailable, will probably want to share bodies as a form of intimacy

overall its a solid 6.5/10 dateability for me i love the directness and no bs approach, we would def get along well. however, while im not sensitive, shes def gonna hit on some insecurities at some point and it will cause an argument lol. but i mean whatever. it happens. the body sharing would be an issue though, same reason i wouldnt be chill with having a symbiote despite being a major venom fucker. i need my space i cant deal with that. so thats a possible deal breaker if she couldnt get over that lol. and she wont, so we wouldnt work out. i wish it fuckin would tho😭😭😭 i would take whatever crumbs of attention she would be willing to give me

Melzalgald, my fav they/them bastard:

pros: amorphous and shapeshifting aka extremely attractive according to my taste in monsters, tall af but could chose to be a more reasonable survivable size lol, self contained and self-entertaining so they dont need a ton of attention to be happy, funny af, rich, will give you whatever you want and probably a bunch of shit you didnt know you wanted, very fun, built in friend group if you didnt already have friends, extremely emotionally intelligent and great people skills due to living in a collective, stupid af by choice, like some of em are very smart, but they dont claim that, will say fuck work and tell boros to eat shit to spend time with you, will kill for you as well, but only if you ask them to bc their first inclination is to just bother someone to death, very loyal, once they like you they like you really forever, it would take some pretty extreme circumstances to make them dislike you

cons: annoying af and its unavoidable, will talk over you, all of them at once will talk over you and do so loudly, no respect for personal space, they dont even know what that is, will probably accidentally manhandle you, they act stupid but arent so they can be manipulative, even if it isnt bad and they dont really mean to be, impulsive, forgetful of the needs of organic creatures so they will bother you at all hours of the day and night if you arent firm with boundaries, disgustingly extroverted and will bring randoms to your place without asking, or just...make new cluster members and you have to roll with it, will eat or absorb literally anything you have, will antagonize and bother you for fun, major jump scare risk since sometimes the forms are....fleshy

this ones hard for me like theyre hot af and i feel like they’d be super fun and good partners, but god....the noise. idk how long i could deal with that lol i dont like people in my house. it would drive me up the wall, but then again...i can simply kick them out when ive had enough. they arent projecting mental illness directly into my brain or requiring me to share a body sintelligento major plus. creepy thing/symbiote style hot monster without any of the invasiveness so tbh 8/10 dateability

some people date loud annoying extroverts who dont understand personal space that /arent/ rich, loyal, or emotionally intellegent so i’d be winning on a few different fronts lmao

[gordvendomewhore]

can the preps cook?

what’s up losers

i haven’t made a headcanon post in what feels like forever but lately my wifi has been sucking DICK so i pumped this shit out and whoop now we have a post

this isn’t as lengthy as my preps in quarantine post but i’m still putting a whole “keep reading” thingy

this post is pretty plain and nothing real special, but i hope you enjoy anyway

(i say this everytime but these are based on my fanon interpretations of them!! canonically, none of the preps would know how to cook or even how to cut an apple, so take this with a grain of salt LMAO)

derby:

he can’t, and he won’t.

he has servants cook for him 24/7 so like,,,, what’s even the point of cooking for himself LMAOOO

if derby tried to cook, he wouldn’t burn down the kitchen or anything like that, but he wouldn’t make anything half decent and would then blame everyone around him for his own depressing failure

so it’s best to just,,, not let him into the kitchen at all

more for the other preps’ sake than his

3/10. he would have a better score if he weren’t such a bitch. 

bif:

eh, he’s not bad

he certainly doesn’t cook for fun because “what’s fun about doing poor people activities,” but he knows how to do the basics

if he has someone helping him, he can do more intermediate dishes but again, he doesn’t cook for fun

bif only cooks when he or another prep are hungry and he has absolutely nothing better to do

he doesn’t like cooking big family dishes for things like breakfast or dinner, but he’s not completely opposed to it

5/10, he’s mediocre but not horrible

gord:

gord cannot cook. gord cannot cook. do NOT let him in the kitchen.

he likes to brag that he can do everything and anything, including cooking, but that's only ever resulted in the fire department coming to the academy and crabblesnitch getting a few wads of hush money

but while gord does burn water, he is EXCELLENT at plating dishes and he KNOWS what looks good

honestly his cheese platters are a gift from the GODS

1/10 for cooking, but a solid 11/10 for presentation

parker:

he can’t cook, but he’s not completely useless

parker is what i’ll call a “backseat cooker”

like a backseat driver except in the kitchen

he knows his seasonings, kitchenware, and recipes quite well, but he’s just horrible at actually,,,, putting it all together and making something

so he just hands you your tools and ingredients when you need it and advises you on what to do

he’s very cute kitchen help, and probably wears one of those aprons that says “kiss the cook”

he and bif are a pretty good pair in the kitchen

6.5/10, knows what he’s doing but can’t actually do it. his cuteness makes up for it though.

tad:

tad is a baker. not a cooker.

he’s excellent at baking, and it’s a hobby of his he genuinely likes and enjoys (even though it’s not the stereotypical rich activity)

however that doesn’t mean he magically knows how to cook

like bif, tad knows the basics because being a baker means that he knows his way around the kitchen

but overall he avoids cooking as much as he can (which is easy because surprise surprise! he’s fucking rich and servants cook for him)

tbh cooking probably scares him

“if i wanted oil to pop at me i’d go start a spat with the greasers.”

4/10 for cooking, but a good 8/10 for baking!

justin:

only knows how to make egg dishes.

that’s it.

his knowledge ranges from scrambled eggs to avgolemono and everything in between

if you asked justin to fry a fish, he would curse you and your feeble bloodline and probably finish you off by spitting in your mouth

justin doesn’t cook for fun, and only when someone else asks him to

(but that isn’t very often since the preps get sick of eating eggs 24/7)

(tbh they probably gave justin an intervention about this)

10/10 egg skills but 0/10 overall because he literally CANNOT make anything else

chad:

hey, look what we have! someone who can actually cook!!

i have always PREACHED that chad is a completionist and has TONS of hobbies so of course he cooks!

he’s the only prep that cooks for fun, but he never really cooks to,,, eat yknow??

chad is more into cooking really intricate dishes that look expensive enough to be in a food magazine; basically he cooks for the “glamour” of it

he never really eats his own food, he only ever tastes a lil to see if it’s up to his standard

he just gives his cooking to the other preps and is HELLA smug if they like what he made

chad and gord are a good pair in the kitchen, since chad can make fancy food that gord makes look even fancier

9/10!! he’s good at what he does and he knows it!!!

(smh cocky bitch)

bryce:

he doesn’t know,,, how to cook

the other preps that can’t cook (like derby and gord) have attempted to learn before but just,,,, can’t.

but bryce on the other hand hasn’t had the chance to learn at ALL

honestly he’s terrified of failure so he just doesn’t try

even though he thinks cooking is genuinely interesting

(pssst your insecurities are showing bryce)

the only times he’s in the kitchen is when he’s watching the other boys cook

(he watches like an excited child 🥺)

1/10. he would be good if he tried, but we all know he won’t.

pinky:

pinky knows how to cook. however pinky does not LIKE cooking

her parents forced her to take cooking lessons in order to be a fit housewife in the future for derby, but yeah uhhh

pinky is a lesbian and refuses to be a ‘50s housewife.

so whenever you put her in the kitchen she PURPOSELY causes complete mayhem and chaos

if the preps don’t want to die within the ashes of the harrington house, pinky stays OUT of the kitchen.

-10847302/10. she’s a demon.

(but her actual cooking is decent and is a solid 7/10)

feel free to tell me if you think i’m wrong lmaoo but thanks for reading!! 

my asks are open and i know that there’s a 5% chance anyone will but whoop send me an ask if you want to

but yes yes, again, i hope you enjoyed reading and i hope you have a nice day <3

[the-bisexual-bean]

Rating lgbt+ movies and shows that I have recently watched, mind you this is just my personal opinion and the types of movies/shows that I like may be differ from many others.

1. Love, Victor (Hulu)- I absolutely loved this show, It’s a great show about discovering yourself and your sexuality and shows teens behaving like teens (for the most part) 9/10

2. Portrait of a Lady on Fire (Hulu)- While this movie was suggested by many and many loved it, it wasn’t really my type of movie. While it’s beautify shot and put together, I’m not the biggest fan of artistic movies like this. I’d probably give it a 6/10, it’s pretty good but it’s not the type of movie for me

3. I Am Jonas (Netflix)- Similarly while this movie is artistically made and put together it’s not the type of movie I really enjoyed. It’s good but I personally don’t really get the whole point of it so I’d give it a 5/10

4. Holding the Man (Netflix)- On the other hand I absolutely loved this movie, while it’s a bit long I think it’s totally worth it. It’s based on the memoir written by Timothy Conigrave about his love story with John Caleo. Its amazing and it almost made me cry, so get ready. This deserves an 100/10

5. The 10 Year Plan (Hulu)- While this type of movie may not be for everyone I loved it, and thought it was funny and enjoyable. It’s something lighter and fun to watch and I give it a solid 7.5/10 or 8/10

6. Princess Cyd (Hulu)- This is another movie where I didn’t really get it, while it was a nice watch I don’t really understand the point behind it? It’s good though so I’ll give it a 6.5/10

7. 3 Generations (Netflix)- I watched this movie a while ago but I remember loving it, it’s really good and gave me perspective into a life I know nothing about. I give it a solid 9/10

8. Alex Strangelove (Netlfix)- I feel like this is a good coming of age story, and is a decent watch. It’s pretty funny in the way that most coming of age stories are and it shows a variety of characters 8/10

9. Handsome Devil (Netlfix)- I enjoyed this movie, it’s another good coming of age/into sexuality movie. While it doesn’t show a ton of gay romance I still think it’s a good lgbt+ movie. 9/10

10. The half of it (Netflix)- I got to be honest, not my favorite movie out there. It wasn’t really that good to me and it just reminded me of a book you’d read in English class. I’d give it a 5/10

11. Lez Bomb (Netlfix)- It’s funny but I felt like it kind of dragged on and after a certain point wasn’t all that great. It’s another 5/10

12. Sense 8 (Netlfix)- While this show isn’t focused on lgbt+ related topics it still shows a wide variety of relationship types and different forms of love, plus I thought it was great in general. Loved the show I’d give it a 9.5/10

13. Hollywood (Netflix)- Another show that mains focus isn’t lgbt+ it still is a good show to watch and it has lots of lgbt+ content in it. Overall it’s a fun watch and I got sucked right in, another 9.5/10

14. Sex Education (Netflix)- Another show thats mains focus isn’t on lgbt+ characters but it does show them and represent many different sexualities in it, I think it’s a great show and while it may have some issues it’s still a good watch. 9/10

15. Tell it to the Bees (Dont remember)- Just remembered about seeing this movie, it’s been a hot minute but I remember thinking it was great. While it is an artsy movie I still enjoyed it and thought it was really good. 8/10

16. The Society (Netflix)- This is definitely one of my favorite TV shows, it may not be everyone’s type of show but I loved it. There isn’t a whole long of lgbt+ representation in here but there is a relationship, between a deaf character and a closeted character, that takes place so I’m including it. 7/10 (the show is amazing but not a ton of representation)

17. Beach Rats (Hulu)- Not really a fan, I found it a bit boring tbh. I’ve had it be recommend by a couple of people but it’s not my type of film. 5/10

18. Call Me by Your Name (illegally)- It would be okay except there is a big age difference and one of them is 17, which just make it seem very pedo-like. I know a lot of people loved it but I couldn’t get over that fact, it really ruined it for me. 4/10

19. D.E.B.S. (Illegally)- It was super stupid and funny, just complete satire but I enjoyed it, if you want something chill to just vibe this is a good movie to watch (they do use the r-slur once though so points off) 7/10

20. Happiest Season (Hulu)- This movies pretty good but it is your average “ahh I’m not out to my family yet and I’m bringing my SO over” kinda movie. I’ve seen a couple and they all go almost the same way, which is fine cause they’re good but for once I wish it was a movie that wasn’t about coming out. Overall I’ll give it a 6/10 in the spirit of Christmas.

21. Milk (Amazon)- This movie is based on Harvey Milk’s life and while there are some things they didn’t get completely accurate throughout the film I think it is still a wonderful and moving movie. It follows his life from 40 to his death and his many political campaigns as one of the first openly gay public officials. I give it a 8/10 because it was a great watch but I know it isn’t completely accurate. I will be reading a historically accurate book about his life soon (both the movie and book are for a paper for my History class) so if you want me to tell y’all about it let me know!

22. She-Ra (Netflix)- normally I’m not really able to get into cartoons but I loved this one so much! It’s just a fantastic show with so many twists and turns that just blew my mind, and there is a bit of representation for mostly everyone in it even though some the characters aren’t even human-like.  it isn’t a show that focuses on being gay which I kind of enjoyed, I liked how they just threw it in for a little bit spice and just showed the relationships as normal and typical and not making a big deal of out of. I highly recommend it and give it a 9.5/10, it’s only not a perfect time to 10 because I feel like the ending could’ve been better and expand more. 

23. Heartstopper (Netflix)- I never read the series but I watched all of it over 2 days so hopefully that says something about how good it is. From what I’ve seen it’s pretty true to the material source which is always great, and the story is just amazing. There’s tons of representation and shows teens being teens and figuring themselves out. I really liked it and can’t wait for more! 9/10

24. Our Flag Means Death (HBO)- This is a fantastic show that I absolutely loved. Definitely need another season cause that ending, ahhhh (if you know, you know) but yea 10/10 definitely recommend

25. Interview with the Vampire (2022 version, illegally)- loved the movie so I thought I’d give this a try. It was good if I ignored what it was supposed to be based on since there are just so many inconsistencies. It is gay but also so toxic and abusive so that’s not good. Overall 7/10 for the show 0/10 for the relationship, it’s not healthy man.

26. Dragon Prince (Netflix)- This is a great magical show and it has lots of just casual representation. There’s no big fan faire about it and no one makes a big deal, that’s just how life is and there’s more pressing matters. It’s also just a great show, even though I feel I’m not the target demographic. Overall 9/10, currently having finished the newest season so we’ll see how it goes.

While this may not be that long of a list there are still a ton of lgbt+ movies and shows that I haven’t had the chance to watch or finish, there are many more on my list to watch through. Once I’ve seen a some more I’ll make another list of ratings. Do y’all have any suggestions based on what I like? If so just drop a note (? I’m not really see how tumblr works ngl)

[city-of-harmony]

Always Live For Always (A.L.F.A.) by Skott

ambient indie pop artist Skott has been making music since 2016, but Always Live For Always is her first ever full-length album. it came out quite recently, on June 26, 2020, and it is a pretty good mix of new songs and old favorites. as a huge fan of her unique style of music for quite a while, i cannot express enough how excited i was for this album to come out--and you know what? i was not disappointed.

1. Stay Awake - 7/10

Do you ever think About the things that could have been? Do you ever dream like I do? Do you keep it close to you?

this song is a new one! it starts out gentle, and while the drop in the chorus isn’t the hardest hitter in the world, it suits the light, wistful nature of the song perfectly while still leaving you with goosebumps. i like this song--it’s very reflective and hopeful while still having a dark overtone. very evocative of and true to Skott’s overall style.

2. My Name - 6.5/10

You had the best of me Do you remember what it's like? My name is haunting you You cannot run from what you've done

another original song from this album, My Name is quite chill and subdued. not quite as soft as, say, Midas, but it’s still a very calm vibe. i really like the horn lead (and the classic Skott pseudo-choir) in this one! that being said, i think the ending could have been a bit stronger--i’m just not about studio fade-outs, i guess.

3. Talk About Me - 6/10

Ooh, your insecurity is a state of mind And you better make a scene or get left behind Cause everything's forgiven on the day you die, right

this song was released as a single about a month ago, if i’m not mistaken. it’s catchy! the lyrics in particular appeal to me a lot (and no, it’s not just because they mention my home state, lol). i like the cheeky arrogance, the satirical portrayal of celebrity culture. however, this sounds a little too much like mainstream pop for me, personally, which is why it’s ranked so low on the scale. the style of the song definitely suits the subject material, but it’s not up to my personal taste, so! alas!

4. Bloodhound - 6/10

'Cause I’ve been planning for an alibi To take you out of sight, take you out of mind Every second, every minute counts I release the hounds and they’re running out

ah, Bloodhound. this was the first song that Skott released under her own record label, Dollar Menu. the vibe of this song is very dark and mysterious, and that hook is so catchy. for whatever reason, i don’t particularly have much to say about this track. it’s not bad! not my favorite, either!

5. Benz - 7/10

I stayed up all night Trying to figure out How you got everything That I never needed

i must say, i’m kind of impressed in particular with Skott’s vocal performance in this track! her voice has always had an ethereal quality to it, but the subtle ornamentation she uses in this track really makes it shine. i also really like the synths; it sounds very 80s, and i think the slight cheese factor really works for this song.

6. Porcelain - 9/10

We have got the power of destruction You can always let it fall But when we try to work on something solid It is too goddamn hard

this is it. this is where it all began: Skott’s first single, now finding its place on her first album. this song is beautiful. from the pensive lyrics to the lovely ornamentation to Skott’s impressive vocal range, this was a very strong start to her career. hearing it now makes me feel such a sense of pride and nostalgia. it still holds up today just as strongly as it did 4 years ago.

7. Midas - 4/10

Always, always live for always Till we die together

okay. i’ll say it. i don’t like Midas. i’ve tried to like it, but it’s just not for me. Skott’s voice sounds lovely, for sure, but the stark instrumentation, the King Midas allegory that sounds, imo, a little convoluted...i dunno. this is probably the weakest track on the album for me.

8. Kodak & Codeine - 8/10

Sometimes you go dark But it’s a darkness I go mad for

on the flip side, i absolutely Do like Kodak & Codeine. that piano hook, that driving bass, those BELLS...ough. i get chills. this is a well constructed song. it’s a song about a toxic relationship, i’m pretty sure? honestly, the lyrics aren’t...the best at communicating the message, i think, but whatever. she’s Swedish, i’ll give her a pass. based on sound alone, this song is one of the strongest on this album. a shame i don’t listen to this as much as i should!!

9. Amelia - 10/10

I swear if you reach that door You're not welcome anymore

Amelia is an oldie but a goodie, and it really tugs at my emotions. it’s so haunting. the harp, the lyrics, the chorus of almost ghostly vocalizations throughout the song...i know Skott has talked about the intended meaning of the song, something about young love or whatever, but to me it sounds a lot more like escaping from a toxic domestic environment. maybe i’m just projecting!! but that would suit the overall vibe much more. anyway, i’ve always loved this song. this is the standard i tend to hold other Skott songs to, lol.

10. Burning Incense - 8.5/10

And I hate how it just don't make sense How I feel more lonely with you than myself I don't understand

if there was one word i could use to describe this song, it would be immersive. something about it just sucks you in and it feels like you’re wrapped in it. this is a perfect mix of all of Skott’s styles, from her driving beats to her deep orchestral environments to her soft vocal-focused moments. this is an excellent new entry into her discography. a delight to my ears. not to mention the depth of the lyrics--it’s not often that you see songs that address the problem of loving someone who doesn’t fit together with you in the way you need them to.

11. Settle Down - 10/10

I think I've found it There's just nothing I would rather do Now that I've found it Would you let me settle down with you

the last song on A.L.F.A. is a love song, which is quite rare for Skott--and it’s a good one! my goodness is it good. the melody, the instrumentation, the beat, the lyrics, everything works together so well and sounds incredible. it’s so refreshing to hear a brighter, happy sound from Skott. she still has that haunting overtone, of course, but this song is the kind of song that closes out the album with pleasant satisfaction and a great taste in your mouth. this has to be my favorite new release.

Average Album Score: 7.5/10

well! there you have it! i think i’d call this a successful debut album! all of these songs are incredibly true to the niche that Skott has carved out for herself, and i absolutely recommend every single song on this album (yes, even Midas).

[queen-of-bel]

alright, i finished mgr. thoughts ahead [mgs1/2/4 spoilers]

okay first off, this is a solid game. i’d probably give it like a 6.5 or 7/10. some things i feel worth mentioning:

the “difficulty” is nonexistent. i shouldn’t be able to get to the final boss on normal difficulty before even realizing that weapons upgrades exist. parrying is beyond broken, and it’s part of the reason why i never bothered to learn the game controls or buy new skills. the game never gives any incentive for me to try any harder.

soundtrack was alright. tbh i typically don’t like metal or heavy music, but sundowner’s theme slaps. definitely going to add that to my workout playlist from now on.

alright, the thing i want to ramble most about-- raiden’s drastic character change. i’ll preface this by saying that mgs2 raiden is easily my favorite protagonist in the entire franchise. there are just so many things that i love about him and find really interesting, but mgr kind of..... walked back on practically all of it.

i guess i was just hoping that mgr would be more about raiden... overcoming his trauma? acknowledging his past, and seeing that he can live a normal life? i mean, i feel that’s what his character arc was in mgs2/4. in 2, he lied to snake about his past, saying he had trained extensively in VR only. he also tells rose that he hates his past more than anything else in the world, and that there’s no way to erase his childhood. the only people who have no problem with his past just have their own secrets and hidden agendas, but the past two years of normalcy that he spent with her were more than he could ever have hoped for. 

even in 4, he goes to war because he feels that the battlefield is the only place he belongs. idk, i just really liked raiden bc it was sad to see him long for a normal life, but he felt that his past had damned him to being a soldier on the battlefield for the rest of his life. i mean, when he’s stopping outer haven in 4, the only thing on his mind is rose. that happy domestic life with rose is all he’s ever wanted. mgr!raiden just felt like a completely different character and i’m not going to lie, that was pretty disappointing.

if mgr wanted to go this “cyborg accepting that maybe he does enjoy killing” route, then frank jaeger would’ve been a waaaay better choice. i think putting this game in the early 2000s and giving us a better glimpse into frank’s life post-zanzibar land would’ve been really cool

tldr, this is a good game. not really a fan of how it fits in with the mgs series, but on its own, it was a fun ride.

[gnome-thine-enemy]

My mom brought up a really nasty trauma memory on Saturday and it sent me spiraling out of control. Or so I thought.

I asked myself a really thought-provoking question in a moment of clarity -- or maybe it was a moment of self preservation, I don't know.

What did I do differently this time?

9 years ago, when I first started recognizing my mental health issues, I'd have self-medicated with drugs. I'd disengage and lock myself in my room, treating the people around me like utter trash. I'd binge eat, neglect myself and my surroundings, and I'd immerse myself in something distracting in an effort to bury the feelings again. 1/10

3 years ago, with my last counselor, I would have self-medicated with drinking and had a guilt session, where I'd complain about my guilt and she'd quote the Bible at me or talk about her own (often only vaguely relevant) experience. I'd call off work for a day, collect myself and try again. Most of the time, I'd end up in a vicious cycle. Rinse, lather, repeat. 2/10

A year ago, with my current therapist, I'd do some CBT exercises to manage my distress. When the exercises didn't work, maybe I'd drink about it. It was a toss up. When we regrouped, I'd be honest, but I'd filter out the details that I was ashamed of, or gloss over them, thinking I'd work on it on the back end. 6.5/10

On Saturday, immediately after it happened, I called a trusted friend, I went for a walk in the cold air until she arrived, and I emailed my therapist, asking for an emergency appointment. I called off of work, sat with my emotions, and rested. When the mood grabbed me, I'd do some strength/flexibility training, write, try to tidy up a bit, take a bath, or watch a movie/show. I really only did what I could, but it was more than I'd done before. I collected my thoughts and prepared for the appointment. I'd give this a solid 9.5/10, since there's always room for improvement.

In the appointment today, I was honest and candid. I showed vulnerability and cried when I felt like crying (I don't think I've ever cried in any therapy appointment, that was pretty big tbh). I asked questions. I let him validate me--I really listened this time, instead of writing it off because he didn't have the whole story. I took his feedback openly. And I prioritized my mental health and stability when it came to rescheduling: not work, not money, not convenience.

If you ask me, while I'm not perfect or really all that okay right now, I'm getting there. And I'm goddamn proud of myself. I feel like I'm on a really good path, and I'm ready for my breakthrough. Things are going to be different this time, I can feel it.

[ctl-yuejie]

For the ship ask petekao and morksun?

thank you!!! (disclaimer: i haven’t read the novels and have only watched 5 episodes of dbk so far - i have watched kiss, kma and our skyy though)

petekao

who’s the cuddler: Kao? Overall Pete is more the physical type but when it comes to physical affection Kao likes to cuddle whereas Pete prefers the more rated activities. He does like to hold Kao though.

who makes the bed: I think they both do. But Kao does it because he likes thinks neat, Pete does it because after hitting puberty he didn’t necessarily like the housekeeper to touch his bed so he does it out of habit but doesn’t mind it if it’s not done. 

who wakes up first: Kao. Early riser, you get more shit done the earlier you start, even though I don’t think he particularly enjoys it. 

who has the weird taste in music: hmmm…I believe Kao’s taste in music is rather sophisticated but not pretentious enough to be considered weird. Pete is one of those people who somehow don’t care much about music, so nothing stands out as well.

who is more protective: I believe they are both protective. Pete more loudly and publicly, Kao in trying to keep Pete out of harms way in a more subtle way. He is a worry-head though.

who sings in the shower: Kao. And it is very cute. Pete does it occasionally and Kao would never mention it but it is quite funny.

who cries during movies: Kao. like full-on snot nose crying. Pete will roll his eyes and click his tongue but hand Kai tissues and lets him use his shoulder.

who spends the most while out shopping: Pete. Rich boy still hasn’t a good sense on what is expensive and what is not and being thrifty is too much of a hassle if you can afford the expensive one anyways. He will hackle with street vendors though, because that’s the way to do it. 

who kisses more roughly: Pete.

who is more dominate: Pete (this is canon).

my rating of the ship from 1-10: tbh, I like the idea and their characters. I adore Pete’s dad and obviously love TayNew. They also have great chemistry and more often than not have ad-lipped to the betterment of teh scene. however their relationship in KMA was wayyy to rough for me and how Kao feels like he has to hide stuff so Pete doesn’t get angry and Pete also having jealous anger issues is a bit tough at times. soooo 6.5 out of 10 with lots of potential though.

morksun (this is more me guessing than having an actual clue)

who’s the cuddler: hmmmmm…..pretty evened out I’d assume. maybe Sun likes to hold Mork close and Mork more revels in the feeling of knowing that Sun is lying next to him (no necessarily hugging him)

who makes the bed: Sun (he seems like the orderly, pedantic type)

who wakes up first: Sun seems to adhere to a schedule but since the cafe doesn’t open that early it might actually be Mork, who has a super chaotic sleeping schedule so it does happen that he’s awake earlier than Sun. But you might just as well find him in bed after 12 if he doesn’t have anything to do.

who has the weird taste in music: Sun would have a surprising old-fashioned and sometimes kitschy taste in music. You’d think it is Mork, because he listens to some obscure indie bands but in the end those make solid pop-ish rock music and Sun’s playlist sometimes get really weirdly old-timey.

who is more protective: hmmm— they’re both protective in their own ways? Mork is more abrasive and confrontational whereas Sun will watch potential threats from a distance and will try to eliminate them without Mork noticing.

who sings in the shower: neither? I’m not quite sure. Mork might just be super loud in the shower in general (yelling at the water temperature, getting soap in his eyes, trying a cool move and almost slipping etc)

who cries during movies: hmmm….Mork? He seem a little bit less in control of his emotions. They also get sad about different things so they can always console the other, even when Sun isn’t outright crying.

who spends the most while out shopping: Sun? Mork might buy the occasional random item that wasn’t on the shopping list but Sun will be over prepared and stock up on everything so he’ll use way more money.

who kisses more roughly: hmmmm…not necessarily roughly but I’d imagine Sun to give deeper kisses, and Mork’s to be more energetic and quick.

who is more dominate: again I’d think they are pretty even and like to challenge each other as well

my rating of the ship from 1-10: while I haven’t watched their full story, I do like the set-up and their general characters so I’d say an 8 ^^ (since I haven’t actually watched all of DBK)

thanks for asking

send me a ship game

[spontaneousmusicalnumber]

My SWSH Review

Beware of spoilers under the cut, but I had a lot of mixed feelings about this game. I broke things down into categories so I could better keep track of what I liked and didn’t like in the game. 

Gameplay Time: I finished the game at roughly 32 hours of gameplay, when normally I expect to finish a game at closer to 48 hours. Was more than a little disappointed when I reached the end. 5/10 was nice while it lasted.

In-Game General Content: As I noted above, this game felt emptier than I expected. Not as much to explore or many side plots to follow. Some of the towns were teeny tiny. Does anyone even live in Spikemuth? There was ONLY a gym and shop. They really hung their hats on the wild areas, easily the star of the game. For the few towns where they were relevant and nearby, I felt an almost perfect balance between a traditional pokemon game and more of a BoTW-style open world. Pokemon fans have been clamoring for an open world style game for years, and they did a really good job on that portion of the game. But there was no victory road, no post-game unlocked areas, routes were short, towns were the same few amenities with a different look. No way to farm berries, either. 7/10 Great visual design and stellar job on the wild area, wish there was more to fill it in. 

Gym Battles and Gym Plot: Easily the most excited I’ve ever been about the gym system. The way they built up excitement and hype for the gym leaders as well as the atmosphere of the battles themselves is sublime. When the music first shifted to the chanting crowd carrying the melody, I ascended. They aimed to recreate the sheer adrenaline of battling in a packed stadium and they hit the nail on the head. They did a great job building up Leon as the toughest champion, and then actually delivering one of the toughest battles I’ve had. A+. 10/10 One of the best in the franchise.

Villain Battles and Villain Plot: I was confused the entire game. Are we supposed to trust Rose, the capitalist who basically owns Galar? Everyone loves him, so I guess the weird vibes I get are wrong. Team Yell are the villain henchmen right? But it doesn’t even have a leader, they’re just fans, turns out they weren’t even acting under orders so they didn’t have a goal. What is Bede’s deal? Is he working on villainous plans? Oh turns out he wasn’t acting under orders either and is just a turd. Oh the secretary is the villain? Oh, no she had orders? From who? Oh Rose IS the villain, they did a piss poor job of foreshadowing that. None of the Grunt/Executive/Boss progression you would generally expect in a Pokemon game. 1/10 keep some consistent throughlines next time. 

Postgame Content: There’s an interesting continuation of the two kings legend that was found in game, with two of the most poorly designed characters I’ve ever seen as the villains. It gets rather repetitive in the middle while you face all the dynamax pokemon, but I appreciated more Piers content. Overall it was quite short, tying up Hop’s character arc nicely but making me quite sad that the story was over for real so fast. There are no postgame areas unlocked, the only postgame content is the Battle Tower. No national dex, of course. After hearing Masuda hint at extensive postgame content, definitely a disappointment. 3/10 There’s a theme here of good content but not very much of it. 

Battle Hook: Every game in the last few years has a battle gimmick: Mega Evolution, Z-Moves, etc. Dynamax and Gigantamax hold up well, really changing the way a battle can work. The Dynamax raids are a great addition to the series, making social battles a collaborative effort instead of a competitive one. Dynamax only lasting a few rounds also makes strategy interesting. I found myself enjoying it a ton! I do wish the difference between Dynamax and Gigantamax was explained some more, or whatever a ‘dynamax level’ is.  9/10 Solid!

Pokemon Designs: We’ve come to my absolute favorite part of the game. The new pokemon are STELLAR. I managed to avoid spoilers for the starter evolutions, so the anticipation for how my Grookey and Hop’s Sobble were going to change was intense. Although a few are a little further down my list of favorites (Looking at you, Silicobra) I didn’t really dislike any new design I saw. Galar forms were great as well, as an ecologist Cursola hit me hard. Really liked how old pokemon got new evolutions! 11/10 I want an army of Snom. 

Overall Dex Composition: First off, lots of points are taken away for not having a National Dex. You made your bed Gamefreak, you made over a thousand pokemon, now lie in it. Looking past that though, I did like the mix of generations that came in. Gen one was not the favorite here! It was pretty evenly split up, both from classic pokemon and Galarian forms. Some of my often-missed favorites were here (Croagunk, Morelull, Bronzor) and it felt like what pokemon were chosen, were chosen with care. 6/10 Wouldn’t have this section if there was a national dex.

Shiny Hunting Methods: This is an important factor to me. According to the most up-to-date sources, the native shiny method for this game has 2 facets, and one is untrackable. The first is how many total pokemon of a species you have battled, tracked in the Dex. The second is your catch combo, or how many of that species you have caught or battled in a row. This second one is invisible. What breaks it? What maintains it? How do you track it? Nobody knows! It’s never mentioned to even be a thing in game, so there’s no way to find out. 3/10 clunky. 

Overall Experience: I went into the game not knowing how high to set my expectations. As I started I had a lot of fun, feeling the old pokemon hype set in again. But as I progressed, I started to feel the emptiness in places. It is well known that this game was rushed in development, so not everything intended showed up in the final product. This was really easily felt, especially in post game. I did have fun. A lot of fun, at times. But it always ended too soon. Overall, I’d give the game a 6.5/10.