#Irish and Scottish pubs

[johnschneiderblog]

The real thing

You can open a bar on any street in the U.S. and call it a "pub." You can even call it Patrick Casey O'Shaughnessy's Irish Pub. But that doesn't make it one.

Having spent many recent nights in Scottish and Irish pubs, I've formed some ideas of what a pub should be.

It should be small. This encourages intimacy. When there are only, say, a dozen tables in a place, chances are you'll be sitting - and chatting - with people you don't know before the night is over.

It should be old - like, centuries old. We were in a pub in Belfast - White's Tavern, established in 1630. Authenticity pervades a place like that. It seeps from the walls.

The entertainment should be traditional and participatory. If somebody walks in the door with reasonable ability and a guitar/banjo/fiddle, etc., the other players naturally scoot over and make room in the circle.

[maeo-png]

scotland declare independence challenge

it is where scotland declares independence

[thlayli-ra]

Ficlet~

I'm so nervous leading into Bad Blood, as much as I'm so here for Punkintyre, I could use some fluff

Drew/Sheamus ....(wouldn't say no to Wade being around either)

Treat: Remembering the littlest of things — activities they like and dislike, favourite brands of stationery, go-to ice cream flavour, choice of popcorn

I'm sorry I didn't get this one out to you in time for Bad Blood but hopefully it can help with the healing process (Also, apologies, I went really self-indulgent with this one 😅)

Treat - 'Remembering the Littlest of Things'

Characters - Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, Wade Barett

Rating - Teen and up

Warnings - Typical sports banter

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walked into a bar.

That... sounds like the start of a joke, but honestly, it isn't. Wade Barrett, Sheamus and Drew McIntyre were heading out to their usual joint, one of those tacky ye olde English pubs that could sometimes be found if you dared to venture into the more touristy parts of the city. It didn't quite hit the same as the pubs back home in the UK and Ireland, but the owner, Big Jim*, was an ex-pat so the place had some genuine charm about it that came close enough.

Also, it was the only place in the entire US that showed the Six Nations every year so it was either there or stay at home, and at least at the pub there would be some form of atmosphere. Also Big Jim really liked his unusual patrons. 'There's never any trouble when you three are about,' he'd said once, and they had to agree, mainly because whenever any trouble did brew, they were the first ones to leap into action and put a stop to it.

It was week three of the rugby tournament, and a tense clash was looming (particularly for the throuple.) Scotland V Ireland! Normally Drew and Sheamus were as sweet and loving as can be, but when it came time for their home nations to butt heads, things could get a little... well, competitive. Ireland, as per usual, were on a winning streak and had their eyes set on a grand slam, while Scotland, by some miracle, had not fluffed up their chances in the first two weeks and were aiming for the same, or at the very least, the Triple Crown.

(England was playing Italy the next day so nobody particularly cared about that. Sorry, Wade. And sorry, Italy!)

Things were running smoothly up to the point the players came out of the tunnel and onto the pitch. The drinks were lined up on the table (Wade, the neutral, got the first round) and the national anthems began to play. Ireland, being the visitors, went first and Sheamus got up onto his chair, hand on his heart to belt out the rallying tune of 'Ireland's Call'. Drew, not to be outdone, stood up to sing along with 'Flower of Scotland', encouraging the rest of the bar's patrons to join in the added chants during the chorus;

'And stood against them ('GAINST WHO?)

Proud Edward's Army (WANKERS!)'

(Again, sorry Wade!)

But then the whistle blew, the game was kicked-off and soon the nastiness began to creep in.

'There's no way that was a knock-on!'

'Penalty! Penalty!'

'HAHA! We're slaughtering yer boys up front, fella!'

'Pass it! Pass it to him, ye dobber!'

'Forward! Hah!'

'HE GOT IT DOWN, REF! ARE YE BLIND!'

'It was held up!'

'NO IT WISNAE!'

And just as the pressure erupted on the pitch with a brawl between an Irish prop and a Scottish second row, Drew and Sheamus got up and squared up to one another too.

'Woah there,' Wade jumped in between them to separate them both. 'Come on chaps, we're all mates here, right?'

Well, the last thing anybody needed at that point in time was an Englishman of all things stepping in and the pair immediately directed their wrath at Wade who cringed away with his palms raised. Sheamus snorted at Drew who glared in return before turning their backs on each other and stomping off to opposite ends of the pub. Wade sighed and sat back down at the now empty table.

But as the half-time whistle blowed and the pundits began to dissect the first forty minutes of the game, the two men began to calm down and regret their rash actions. Sport had a way of raising the blood pressure like few other things could, especially when there was something on the line, but they had let their emotions get out of hand.

So they each began to plan and scheme, Wade watching both of his boyfriends warily as they scuttled about the place, sometimes heading to the bar to speak to Big Jim, until finally they both sheepishly approached the table with their hands behind their backs.

Drew, the softest of the three, apologised first. 'I'm sorry for getting all riled up Sheamo,' he dipped his head with shame. 'I just get... very jittery whenever Scotland play, but that's not an excuse, so here...' and he brought out a platter from behind his back. Immediately Sheamus' eyes grew to the size of dinnerplates. 'I know how much ye love those pickled onions on the bar, and I mind you telling us how yer maw used to put them on a cocktail stick with pineapple and cheese so I asked Big Jim to cut up some cheese and find some cocktail sticks for ye. He didn't have any pineapple but he asked Debs to nip out and buy a tin and, well... here you go.' He placed the lovingly crafted platter on the table in front of the Irishman who eyed it in wonder.

'T'ank ye,' he hushed out. 'I can't believe ye even remember that story about my ma.' He took in a breath to compose himself then straightened up. 'I got you something too.' He placed a bowl of hot french fries in front of him, topped with a type of dark brown sauce. This time, it was Drew's turn to looked stunned. 'Ye know how you said you once went on a night out in Edinburgh and tried chippie chips with salt n' sauce and loved it so much ye converted to it for life and everybody in Glasgow called you a traitor for not liking salt and vinegar? Well, Big Jim and I tried to concoct something similar with brown sauce and vinegar. It took a few attempts to get it right - Debs was our taste-tester and she said the fifth one was the closest so...'

'Wow...' Drew scratched the back of his neck, a little blush forming on his cheeks. 'That's... really kind of you.'

They both locked eyes, somehow understanding the other and slowly turned to face the final member of their throuple. 'Uh, Wade...'

'Oh no, what?' The Englishman looked nervous.

'I also asked Big Jim to make you this,' Sheamus said, placing down yet another plate. 'Fruit scone with jam and cream. They didn't have quite enough cream so Debs made some more. I insisted they put the jam first then the cream second, just how you like it.'

'It's not just how I like it, that's just how it should be,' Wade argued, playfully. 'Anyone who has cream first is just plain wrong!'

'And I asked them to make you this,' Drew put down another plate. 'Cornish pasty, with the crust doing down the side, not on the top.'

'Well, yes, of course or else it's not a Cornish pasty!' Wade lightly protested, making Drew chuckle.

'I know, I know. Big Jim had Debs check them in the freezer beforehand to make sure.'

'You two are the sweetest,' Wade chuckled. 'And here,' he pushed two glasses forward,' I got the next round. 'Guinness for Sheamo (and yes, I made Big Jim wait for the head to form properly) and an alcohol free ginger beer for Drew with no ice.'

'Awww, you shouldn't have!' They sat down and accepted their drinks gladly.

'So...' Drew drummed his large fingers on the table, looking at each of their specially prepared plates in turn, 'are we all forgiven?'

Wade and Sheamus hummed, making a silly display of thinking hard but eventually smiled widely. The throuple wrapped their arms around one another in a huge bear hug, their petty difference put aside just in time to watch the final moments of the second half.

'I don't even know what the score is anymore,' Drew noted, tucking into his fries.

'What does it matter?' Sheamus shrugged, spiking a pickled onion with a cocktail stick.

'Poor Debs,' Wade sighed. 'All that hard work she put in. We need to leave her a huge tip.'

'Yeah, and Big Jim,' Drew agreed. 'After all he did cook up some pasties for me, and even made a platter that wasn't on the menu.'

'And he helped me invent a new sauce recipe,' Sheamus added. 'And even made a fresh scone when he got the jam/cream sequence wrong the first time round.'

'Um... lads.' They looked over to Wade who seemed a bit unsettled. 'Did Big Jim really go to all that effort just for the three of us?' All three pairs of hands froze inches from their mouths and all three pairs of eyes glanced across to the bar where the older man smiled broadly and threw a thumbs up at them all.

'Oh...' Drew whispered. 'That's a bit...'

'Creepy,' Wade finished off for him.

'He must really like having us as regulars,' Sheamus said.

'Maybe it's time we look for another pub,' Drew leant in and whispered.

'Except we have two more weeks of the Six Nations and no other place in town is showing it,' Sheamus pointed out.

'Ok, ok, fine!' Wade chimed in. 'We come back here for the last two weeks then never again. Agreed.'

'Agreed.'

'And we're never going to fall out over something as stupid as sports again? Right?'

'Right!'

'And hey, look,' Drew said, pointing to the screen. 'Now, we can all enjoy watching Wales getting gubbed by France!'

'YAAAAASSSSSSSS!'

And all three stood up, arm-in-arm to belt out 'La Marseillaise'. (Sorry, Wales!)

*Big Jim is a nod to Jim Hamilton, a favourite ex-rugby player of mine (yes, he's tall with dark hair, a beard and tattoos - I am aware I have a type!HAHA!)

(Also the home-made brown sauce was disgusting but Drew ate it all anyway ❤️)

[blicketdabest33]

I have started the Magnus Protocol

i basically spoiled the entire rest of the magnus archives for myself, so onto the Magnus Protocol!! I shall record my thoughts here.

Episode 1

Damn Alex, calling us out like that. I love Alice already OKAY EVERYTHING OUT THE WINDOW COLIN IS MY FAVORITE NOW HIS ACCENT- They're so fun. Alice, i love you, but Gwen is right. Show the new guy how to do things correctly Colin, you are the best IT guy ever. I will protect you with my life ALEXANDER J NEWALL, WHAT IS THIS GAY SHIT- Colin knows German, is a grumpy IT guy, Scottish (or Irish, can't tell which), AND he's scaring everyone? This is my guy, this is my character. Sam is so nervous, i can't believe it, this man is a walking ball of anxiety!!! It's Jon part 2!!! Also what's his accent? I can't place it. JON SHUT THE FUCK UP GWEN AND SAM WERE BONDING!!!! wait, magnus institute ruins? ...oh shit I know what the deal with it is!!!!! I KNOW!!! IT WAS AN OLD TWINK'S DIVORCE TORTURE HOME!!! Yeah there's no pictures, it's the FUCKING DEAD EYE wait is this a reddit thread? oh my god this IS a reddit thread fire? you mean the apocalypse? VICTORIAN ASSYLUMN HAH YOU HAVE NO IDEA ARCHIVE HE SAID THE THING- Graffiti? oooooooooooooooo... WAIT OMG IS IT THE IT"S OOOOOO IT'S THE ENTITIES HAHAHAHAHAAHAHHJFHJKHDJKFHED THIS IS HILARIOUS WHY IS JON READING THIS ONE IMGONNAEXPLODE DISTORTION??? HMMMMMMM old wooden thing? heh? ooooo doxxer Wait this guy getting tense, eehhhehgjh DM'S WHAT y'all ain't getting those pics, this reddit story is fucked- what AYO CANARIES- JIMMY SOLIDARITY, THAT YOU?!!!! *falls over* oh did he post nudes? OH EW EYES HAHA NAHHHHHHHHH NONONONO HHJSFHJFKJD awwww Gwen, do you actually care? SAM WHAT DO YOU KNOW DID YOU WORK THERE awwwww Alice you care so much!! OH SHIT STATIC HAHAHA aw poor Sam... oh really? Good information for england, i didn't know pubs opened that early either. Sam you'll be eating those words in a couple weeks OH THEY'RE EXES HAHA Alice you're iconic, i love you, please buy a sticker or something AWWWW THAT QUOTE IS SO CUTE- HOLTEIKHLEIHGJEHF oh my god Colin what's happening ahhhh this is just the- NO YOU CAN'T END ON THAT!!!!

[thestrangestperson]

TINY WEE PSA

Hi! Are you trying to write some British people? Here are some random thoughts about exaggerated Britishness (With heavy chat about Scotland because I know Scotland the best):

"I'm going to the store!" Store is not a popular word for a place to buy things. People from the UK will generally say "shop". If they're just going to get milk or something, they may go to the "corner shop" - which people from NY especially will know as a "bodega"

"Hand me an eraser." While some people do say eraser, "rubber" is more common. This is amusing to me because to people from the US especially, it's very different in meaning.

If your character is visiting someone, it's very common to be offered tea. "Fancy a cup of tea?" or more casually "Fancy a cuppa?"

Pub ≠ bar. Pubs include bars, but are also places to get a meal. People do go there to drink ("Get a pint") though, and some pubs don't serve children or allow them in. Many do, however.

There are 100s of accents across the nation, more than just typical posh English, Welsh and Scottish. Please pay attention to your character's background and dialect. The city of London alone has 4 major accents. (For Good Omens fans, Crowley and Aziraphale are both sensationally posh. Aziraphale speaks "The Queen's/King's English" which is notably more formal and collected - Crowley does not.)

Some good swears include "Bellend", "Pillock", "Knob" and "Twat". In Scotland we also have the tamer "Daft(ie)" and "Tube"! Any object can become an insult: "You FUCKING MICROWAVE"

Some good pet names include "Love", "Pet" and "Poppet"

Along with tea we have a carbonated drink called Irn Bru. This is ESPECIALLY popular to Scots but you can find it in England. It is bright orange and fruity in taste.

We buy milk in pints

The chocolate bar Freddo is typically how we measure inflation these days. (I wish I could say this was a joke but tabloids love the chocolate test)

It does rain a lot. Like a shit ton. There are sunny days but nonetheless. The way to start conversation is ALWAYS weather. "Lovely weather innit?" always works, especially in terrible weather.

Sarcasm and dry humour are very popular.

IT IS A PETROL STATION, NOT A GAS STATION

A lot of people smoke or vape. This is very evident especially in cities like London and Edinburgh.

People from southern England especially are typically very removed and tend not to pay attention to anyone else. It's a massive "Not my problem". They can be very friendly by all means, but typically keep to themselves and don't talk to many people.

Biscuits rule the world, especially custard creams. (Jk, they're very loved though)

The school systems are different from that in the rest of the world. Even to one another. The Scottish, Welsh and English education systems are different - but are all composed of Primary school and Secondary school.

Typically people are either passionately wild for the Royal Family or REALLY dislike them.

Terraced and semi detached housing is very common. In Scotland we have "closies" which are blocks of flats that home lots of people, and are typically very square and deshevelled.

McDonald's did not arrive here until the 70s. People were confused by it to begin with.

Fish and chips is a stereotypical yet popular dish. Many people refer to going to a fish and chips shop as "Going to the chippy". Often they do not have seating, and are takeout exclusive.

Britain is a geographical reality, composed of Scotland, Wales and England. The United Kingdom is political and composed of Scotland, Northern Ireland, Wales and England.

Irish people may not enjoy being referred to as "British". Furthermore do not call a Welsh, Scottish or Irish person "English". This is a bad idea and will make people mad.

Day in the life of a true Brexit geezer is a documentary. (Jk)

Basically everyone "hates" the English. Whether this is playful or genuine varies from person to person. Even the English hate the English.

Older women especially have very strong feelings about Princess Di (She was so beloved)

For Good Omens fans: Soho is a small tiny little area in the BOROGH of "The City of Westminster". This is a borogh at the heart of London. You can walk Soho in a day.

Most cities don't have boroughs, but do have wee areas which are basically suburbs or collections of areas.

In schools, it's very common to refer to your teachers as "Sir" and "Miss". This also applies outside of school for young people, but generally is seen more in schools.

"Mate" is the most common way to address a male presenting person passive aggressively, along with "Love" for female presenting people. "Mate" is more common and works both ways.

"Pissed" means drunk. "Oh, he's pissed" = "Oh, he's drunk". Increasingly you'll find people say "pissed" to mean angry, especially young people. However "peeved" is what was originally used to mean angry.

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

i do feel sad sometimes that i didn't have any access to english folk trads when i was growing up. i got into irish folk stuff as a tween in part because that was the only sort of folk i really knew about; i didn't have many local musicians to learn from so i got it from youtube and clannad CDs. as an adult most of the folk that's available to me is actually scottish, even though i'm a very long way from scotland, just due to the vibes of where i live. when i play sessions in donegal i don't have the same tunes as people there but i don't have english ones either, i've mostly got scottish ones and there's nothing wrong with that but it's also not grounded in any of the communities i'm actually a member of. there's something about having to borrow it from elsewhere because your own communities have become disconnected that DOES feel alienating

my parents are classically trained (though not musicians by profession) so i grew up with a lot of music but none of it was trad – i played in youth orchestras and wind bands and pit orchs for musicals. they didn't have any interest in folk music even though i know my paternal grandad did play it because i have his "fiddler's tunebook" from 1953 (i never met my paternal grandad though, he died before i was born). it would have made a difference if they did, i think, but our area didn't really have any folk going on, so maybe not that much difference unless they were keen enough to travel for it. they always thought of it as faintly embarrassing, though. when i got into irish music my family referred to it as "diddly diddly music", but in general it would be a lot more socially acceptable to say you do irish dance than to confess to being a clog dancer

but i think a huge part of it is also a class thing. the middle class classical musicians vs the peasant folk musicians, the highly trained dancers in studios vs the everyman in the pub in his boots... there's been a lot of social mobility in my family history and a couple of generations back they were a lot poorer so maybe that's why the folk got left behind as a remnant of those years

and i wonder if that's maybe at the root of a lot of english weirdness about folk traditions. like modern competitive irish dancing as we know it is basically the invention of the gaelic league and a lot of its distinctive features, such as the upright upper body, were specifically constructed to distinguish it from the more relaxed "peasant" styles and to make it a socially acceptable and sophisticated form of national heritage etc etc (catherine foley has an interesting book on the history of it if you want more on that). and this was obviously largely a response to colonisation. the same didn't really happen to the music tho. and the english, as the colonisers, had nothing to defend their heritage against, so that's part of why so much of it got lost, but also never elevated it from being the tradition of working people and peasants and whatever. and the english are SO weird about class (as something quite distinct from income/wealth) so of course folk music and dance would often get pushed aside in favour of ballet and classical music as the acceptably middle class arts, and therefore the folk trads get relegated to an embarrassing footnote that you don't admit to participating in in polite company (read: middle class company)

dunno. some sociologists and ethnomusicologists have probably written about this in more depth and with actual data and better wording. i'm just musing on my own experiences and observations

[ayeforscotland]

is it considered disrespectful for non-scottish ppl to wear kilts? Two examples: 1. there's an Irish pub here (italy) but the waiters wear fake kilts which cracks me up every time. 2. I'd love to move to Scotland one day and buy a kilt of myself/have one made

Once again, no, anyone can wear a kilt. You do not need to be Scottish to wear a kilt. Any nationality can wear a kilt. I once attended where people from Greece, India, Japan, Spain and South Africa all rocked kilts. The guys were beaming when they realised how much attention they got, and how much their partners liked them in it. Depends what you mean by fake kilt - because even the cheapest kilts bought at a supermarket are still kilts. If they are wearing tartan skirts that's something different.

[scotianostra]

Happy Birthday one Scotlands finest musicians' fiddle player Aly Bain, born in Lerwick, Shetland May 15th, 1946.

Bain began playing the fiddle at the age of 11 and studied under influential Shetland fiddler Tom Anderson. In the late '70s, he played on two of Anderson's albums -- The Silver Bow and Shetland Folk Fiddling, Vol. 2. Honing his craft in a series of local bands, Bain attracted international attention after joining Irish/Scottish band, the Boys of the Lough, whom he met at the Falkirk Folk Festival in 1969.

Aly released his debut solo outing, First Album, in 1985. Three years later, he traveled to Louisiana to record the album, Aly Meets the Cajuns. The same year, he met Phil Cunningham at a pub near Edinburgh and they agreed to tour together. Their first duo album, The Pearl, released in 1994, was followed by The Ruby in 1997.

Bain has hosted several musical series for BBC Television. Down Home explored the spread of the Celtic fiddle tradition from Ireland and Scotland to North America. Push the Boat Out, shown in 1991, was taped during the Mayfest celebrations in Glasgow. The Shetland Set, shown the same year, was taped at the Shetland Folk Festival. Bain's autobiography, Fiddler on the Loose, co-written by Alistair Clark, was published by Mainstream Publishing in 1993.

Aly had a wee health scare in 2019 and had to undrgo a triple heart bypass, but was soon on his feet again and is keeping himself busy.

Today, Aly continues to be an ambassador for Scotland abroad and a powerful advocate for traditional music.

Aly Bain & Phil Cunningham are currently touring, you can catch them next at Backstage at The Green in Kinross, on May 23rd The two will be at Sidmouth Folk Festival in August and will return to Scotland for gigs in Forres and Lanark, two concets in Glasgow's Òran Mór in September, quite fitting as the rough translation for the Gaelic name of the venue is 'great melody of life' or 'big song',

[svetzzi]

knightklok stuff Is it headcanons or an au? I don’t know, but either way I sure as hell wrote about it.

Timeline: 1450’s-1480’s

Main Location: Pre-Sherborne/Sherborne, Sherborne Abbey Cathedral

Content Warnings: Character death, Christendom, religious fundamentalism, mentions of torture, mentions of social and systemic racism, mention of alcoholism.

Note: I subscribe to the implication that Dethklok, or even so the other people foretold in the prophecy, have been subjected to reincarnation for eons. Whether or not reincarnation is a normal aspect for everyone’s life-death cycle in the Metalocalypse universe is unknown to me as of writing this, but here I am making it certain for the pawns of the prophecy. Personally I find that the prophecy cave art in season 4,  the “ancient animal forms” from season 2 and onward, and the lyrics of Blazing Star are evidence for this notion. Every force included in the prophecy are doomed to their fates; despite being placed in deadly situations time and time again, they can make it out totally unscathed until their death. Said deaths may seem sudden or untimely on a surface level, but they are always decided by destiny or the universe (or perhaps The Devil if we lean more into the Satanic narrative). Here we see a version of Dethklok from their long line of reincarnations (that also happen to be ancestral to the present-day members), who had failed to fulfill the prophecy and thus had to die and start over.

If there are severe historical inaccuracies, then my apologies, I am not a buff and I made this for fun. If it helps to ease the pain at all, I am certain if this were to actually happen in the show, it would also be incredibly historically inaccurate.

I am also not Catholic, so some things may be wonky in that context as well.

Noah Eruption

Nationality: English / Roma

Weapon: Morningstar

The surname Eruption evolved to Explosion as the English language advanced.

His looks and demeanor forgave his non-chivalrous attitude, however being a man of few words made the public mistake him for chivalrous. Nonetheless his stature and steadfast fighting ability granted him both knighthood and the role of leader for the Sherborne Guard. Born in Canterbury, Noah traveled to Sherborne for personal independence and to no longer deal with those that knew of his mixed Romani bloodline. His morningstar was his closest companion.

Fled and retired to The Western Isles post-exile. In retirement he turned to cattle farming.

Death: Drowning (reason ruled unknown, speculated to be either suicide or accident)

Aengus “Picil (The Ruthless)” Barrel

Nationality: Irish 

Weapon: Dual-Wielded Scottish Dirks

The surname Barrel derives from his English grandfather’s favourite pub.

Picil, freeloader son of a shepherd, lived at his village’s pub. Of course, this habit kind of ruined his life and reputation within his hometown, however he did get some decent knife-tossing skills out of it. The pub eventually changed ownership, and consequently he was banned for being a pest. In some spark of clarity, the young man decided to start off on a clean slate. He packed a bottle for the road and headed for England (I reiterate short-lived clarity was mentioned, not intelligence). As a stumbling Irishman his time living there was incredibly difficult, but upon meeting Noah and Bishop Offgyrdd seemingly by coincidence he was “taken in,” so to speak.

And yes, his classic dirks slightly resemble penises, like God intended.

Fled to Wales post-exile.

Death: Went into the wood at night in a typical drunken stupor and was never seen again.

William “The Barbarian” “The Royal Guard’s Boil” “Barnacle Meat” Murdgruff

Nationality: English-Italian/Ethiopian (see Medieval Ethiopian Discovery of Europe) 

Weapon: Battle Axe

William Murdgruff fled from Italian slums as a young adult, in fear of further discrimination and possible death. He hid in a cart of hay bales and went wherever it took him. Sherborne did not treat him much better upon his arrival, even less so than expected, but the Bishop of the village saw his potential. Murdgruff then proved himself to be a merciless fighter, and with the strong persuasion of Bishop Offgyrdd, he was knighted by the Lord and assigned to the small guard sanctioned in that very town. An exchange was brought in return for his knighthood– that he would keep his appearance a secret from the public, as it would damage the church’s reputation. They even commissioned a custom helmet in order for him to fulfill such an order. He did as told, however that did not stop him from becoming the town’s punching bag due to how he held himself (and having the most non-chivalrous of attitudes, obviously). 

Fled to Germany post-exile.

Death: Tortured and Executed via Wheel at the beginning of The Werewolf Trials after fleeing to Germany.

Sigfrøðr / Sighfridh Swkigelf 

Nationality: Geat 

Weapon: Knightly Sword, though prefers Falchion

Irregular for the time and place, Sighfridh was born to closeted Heathen parents. Their Geatland patriotism imprinted onto him, but he found himself drawn to the Christian environment surrounding his family. Sighfridh saw himself not only in Odin, but in both the Lutheran and Catholic depictions of the Lord. In interest of visiting an authentic Roman Catholic cathedral, he decided to journey west. His stay in England was supposed to be temporary, especially after Toki began to accompany him on his journey, but finding good work with the Sherborne Guard (along with acclaim from all the English ladies…) Sighfridh stayed until the group’s exile.

Before England, Sighfridh was an ice harvester.

Returned to Scania post-exile.

Death: Disease of Totally Unknown Origin (it was definitely not syphilis).

Toki Wartúþr

Nationality: Norwegian/Norse

Weapon: Knightly Sword

(To my knowledge the name Toki has existed since like ~7th Century AD, so I find it perfectly sensible that the name Toki would be present multiple times throughout his family tree.)

He was a Sami boy adopted by Christian parents as a babe. Blessed with the spirit of death, his parents eventually blamed him for the unorthodox deaths of crops and farm animals, even if he was not tending to or near the area at the time of death. Their negative superstition surrounding their son grew more, soon blaming him for the rot of their food and the harsher winters. Believing him to embody the antichrist, they intended to kill him, but Toki found this out and escaped before they could execute their plan. He was a homeless wanderer for years, getting by on stolen goods and river water. It was when he ran into the traveling Sighfridh that Toki finally found some sort of path in life. To Sighfridh’s dismay, Toki was enamored with him and his journey, and so tagged along. 

Exiled.

Death: Murdered.

Bishop Offgyrdd

Nationality: English/Welsh

Weapon: Holy text, witchcraft, sabre

Under the guidance of his most trusted companion, Sherborne’s Archbishop, Offgyrdd was devoted to the underbelly of the church. He typically kept an eye out for any newcomers during the day, and was a transcriber at night. Before the mysterious and gruesome death of Canterbury’s Archbishop, Offgyrdd was– although emotionally distant– an average abbott. Even though transcribing was work for a lower monk, Offgyrdd happily took on the task for The Church of The Black Klok. The loose lips on the group of knights he brought together was ultimately his, their, downfall. From Sherborne Castle, the royal guard was demanded to put an end to this heresy, but they refused. Because they liked Offgyrdd. He was pretty nice to them after all, you know? Their Lord allowed for word— panic— to get out due to this. Reeves and the rest of the general public ended up taking matters into their own hands. The traitorous royal guard’s executions were debated. The enraged mob was still somehow infatuated with them, despite their association with witches. Out of fear of his own life, the Lord mercifully damned the knights to exile. After the beheading of the Archbishop, the last thing Offgyrdd saw was Noah watching his demise from among the crowd.

Thankfully, the actual Black Klok meeting grounds were never found by authorities. 

Death: Executed; burned at stake.

[amidst-wonderland]

final fantasy: rebirth {a mess of emotions, not in chronological order}

this is more story-based, so heads-up spoilers below.

“question. does that make me a dumbass?”

not aerith asking about reno

chadley nearly outing cissnei and cloud getting real confrontational about it.

cloud is so much more conversational in this, i felt in remake he was bordering on joker level’s of player-character. he’s a lot more laidback, which is understandable since he didn’t really know anyone but tifa and midgar’s only like what a week long?

the game now feels like an ensemble piece rather an a cloud simulator.

cloud not realising he’s the one loner friend

americans aren’t the best swearers - put to much emphasis on the swear itself but cloud does it so well.

he’s a prickly, backchatting bitch in this game and i love every single second of it. he’s not mopey, stubborn and grumpy. he’s ‘i’m going to actively make myself your problem if you cross me, so don’t.’

barret immitating yuffie?! or, “oh, wow. tell us more.” it’s giving abridged.

yuffie’s little naruto run!

yuffie and cloud’s growing sibling dynamic is the cutest shit. like, he should be be pissed at her but immediately protected her from the captain.

all i hear is priscilla’s dad’s irish accent from abridged when ever someone says her name or, “mr dolphin, ye daft bastard.”

rufus shinra… the man that you are.

every rude and elena scene, just, yes. her with the ice-lolly, the corneo fight, rude’s pub club?! babysitting palmer. (also, they call it the clean-shaven club when rude literally has a beard).

i genuinely thought we were gonna at least get that iconic reno and rude scene outside of gongaga (and as a long-shot a reunion with cissnei - i stand by the fact tseng absolutely knows where she is.)

that final turks training facility was a bitch to find.

don’t get me wrong, yuffie, barret, tifa and red’s trials were sad but aerith’s absolutely wrecked me. like i’ve got a stuffy nose already and i literally couldn’t breathe with the tears.

same with dyne and barret, like what you mean you want me to fight palmer?! i’m sitting here ugly crying about two men who love their daughter and have been through hell and back.

i’d love to see cissnei and leslie get involved with the wutai turk team-up

as much as i love aerti’s ‘improved over og’ friendship. it’s not passing the bechdel test anytime soon.

fuck queen’s blood.

cloud saying “down boy” sir- THE WHIMPERING!

the kids locking yuffie in with the hooded men on the cruise.

nanaki walking in the cabin on two legs fucking kills me. i also caught barret admiring himself in the mirror.

the fact the name tag is, “???” when we can hear yuffie cheering on cloti.

did they kiss?!

so, we finally see loveless and it was everything i ever wanted. genesis, i’m sorry, you were right.

“death doesn’t suit a turk”

cloud jr is too cute and i love my chocobro protagonists

speaking of, i’m in two heads about ffxv. you can see a lot of the inspiration the team got from that game but i think they left out the one thing that made ffxv perfect, which was the constant chatter during traversal

cloud turning on tifa during the gongaga reactor mission is giving the ffxv: omen trailer

i need a tonberry robot for my desk

jessie’s poster! i really thought she’d be alive with biggs

cloud calling gus a prick is when it clicked for me, like cloud’s got bite

i need esther’s red boots

cid is played by j. michael tatum?! sebastian- france- kyouya-

elena stuck in the heat yelling at rude, omg this is the turk moments i love.

as someone who is scottish, i can’t believe i witnessed cait sith tell cissnei to “wheesht”.

not the biggest fan of cissnei’s new colour scheme. would’ve gone with browns, accented gold buckles and mustard yellow personally

wished they’d’ve put in an turk easter egg in her house.

cosmo canyon’s lantern scene is so pretty.

gold-fucking-saucer. woah

sitting at the water tower with aerith felt wrong, and i know that was intentional.

omfg vincent, why he kinda dressed like gyuvin in en garde?

jesus, roche.

still not keen on seph’s voice - mainly because i don’t like tyler and also zack is better but i’m still not keen

symbiote!peter to “OMG GUYSSS HAIIII” is like fucking whiplash. two minutes ago we were crying over harry, now hotels?!

i knew that’s what marlene saw! and now zack knows! i am not okay!

was low-key waiting on elena throwing the keystone to reno to catch for a grand intro but he kinda just appears, and i loved every second of it.

the way both tifa and aerith have had to stop cloud murdering a turk.

cloud with blood by his own hand on his face is such a chilling image. it’s like seeing someone like superman with it.

avalanche versus reno and rude’s fight was giving advent children, like specifically reno and rude’s fight with loz and kazoo. (which i rewatched recently. rude’s face when reno steps on his glasses is the funniest thing in that film, also i can’t unhear fred from scooby-doo when loz speaks even though i know it’s not frank welker - it’s the dude that plays corneo).

[ashtxeman]

Punch-Out!! Pet Headcanons :]

I thought it'd be nice to get more info out there from the massive 12,000 word document I have for Punch-Out stuff. So, here's what the boys pets are (excluding Don and Hippo who, as of now, don't have any)! Silly disclaimer that some of this information has been put on some individual headcanon posts, so if you think you've seen it before, you probably have! Still nice to compile it all together. Now enough yapping..

Joe would love a cat, but he's allergic so he can't get one. He might cave eventually and just power through it. He does consider Kaiser's pet to be his own, but he's allergic to them so isn't a fan of handing out belly scratches or pats.

Kaiser has a schnauzer called Stahl who rocks a mustache just like him! They get along incredibly well, matching from the military force in their steps when they go on walks, or the muddy green colour decorating their overalls and leashes respectively. An inseperable pair.

Disco has a budgie called Bingo and a parrot called Donna (an odd name, but he insisted on naming it after Donna Summer). He's always been a fan of birds and loves teaching them to talk so he can someday create his own bird choir (where he is the main vocalist).. so far, results are less than desireable. But he still lives his birdy babies.

Hondo has an absolutely ferocious Scottish fold called Tofu, who Hugger named. She will bite, claw, scratch, and hiss at anything that moves, and often times she's been compared to Aran in nature which Hondo sadly agrees with. Deep down she truly does love Hondo, she just has a very violent love language.

Hugger, as anybody would think, has an ungodly amount of animals in his house. A maine coon called Bobby, Murphy the squirrel (who Hondo named), Maple the bear, two horses called Dusty and Valley, a flock of birds that constantly hang around in his garden, a fox called Muse that stops by occasionally, a landseer dog called Beethoven (he couldn't get his hands on a St. Bernard, so he improvised), and a terrier called Husk. 

Tiger has his white tiger, Gahana. She's a gorgeous creature and has the exact same smug nature as her owner. Often time she's kept in India since owning a tiger isn't very common in the states, but whenever Tiger fancies a visit he can easily go over to her or bring her to him.

Aran has a surprising amount of pets. Two weasels called Tom and Jerry (reference intended), a cat called Lucky, and a few lizards named Burren, Porter, Druid and Mulligan (all names of Irish pubs that Aran has definitely been to). His house smells like animal pee and he does not care how much you complain about it.

Soda has two huskies, Sila and Vlast, alongside a miniature pinscher called Sergey who he rescued from the streets. Sila and Vlast are powerful, boastful dogs who love to show off a little, whilst Sergey is more humble but does enjoy playing copycat with his siblings.

Bull doesn't have any personal pets, but has plenty of farm animals (and several bulls) back in Turkey that he gets along well with. Suppose they bring him comfort.

Macho has his three dobermanns, Duke, Cooper and Ace. They are spoilt to death and whenever he has the opportunity he WILL bring them up, so chances are if you know Macho you know the doberbros just as well.

Sandman isn't a big animal fan, but has a guinea pig called Drowsy who loves to cuddle (and sleep). She often loves to snuggle in bed and keep the big man calm when he needs it. She's a suberb emotional support animal.

[luhafraser]

I am totally clueless about Tony, I only know his name and wanted to ask if he is the owner of Numb Music Limited a music production company and of two bars in London ?!!

Don't worry, Anon... Tony was once Brian, and now he's adopted his middle name, Tony GERARD; he was Irish, English, Scottish and now he's British (generic to create less confusion?! 🤔🤣); he is a music producer, band manager, entrepreneur, musician, Caitriona's assistant... Bag-carrier?! 😜

Even Cait is confused about Tony (I think...), which must be why she only calls him "husband" and doesn't introduce him to people (her agent does that)...

😜🤣

About the companies, who knows Tony's REAL role in them. His name appears in the register of 8 companies, the most recent being FMN Drinks. Of these 8, 4 are no longer active.

Numb is the most curious of these companies. It's a family business, Tony's brother, who is a dentist, is also a director of the company.

It's like a place where you can record your album and take care of your teeth at the same time... Quite common, isn't it? 😜 ...

🤣🤣🤣

And about his pub "The Library" (in London) ... Bankrupt! The new owner in 2019 published that the former owner had left a "gift"...

🤣🤣🤣

[carbondated]

KNOWN ALIASES, PART TWO:

Over the years, River has taken up many new aliases out of necessity, Sister Cantica, Miss Spritz, River Allegro. The list is as endless as it is frankly, obvious, which serves the dual purpose of being easy to remember and, a private joke she can enjoy. Of the many, many names, there are four that she finds herself coming back to over the years.Though these particular aliases are active for a long period of time, it does not mean that she lived linearly, keeping careful note of when it was safe to jump back and forwards between her own time-stream.

Here are the final two of those aliases ...

ALLEGRA MARLOWE verse; Post Library ( arc: I could take the whole world with me. )

Name meaning: Allegra typically means joy or lively in the original Italian. She chose it for it's semblance to Allegro however. ( musical term ) Marlowe she chose for it's French origins, meaning from the hill by the lake. Occupation: Anthropologist Qualifications: Doctorate in Anthropology, University of Edinburgh Time zone: Europe/Asia 1980-2008 Nationality: Scottish. Fictional Biography: Allegra comes from a very loving home in Scotland, where her mother supposedly still resides. She is most probably human ( her words ) and not not from around here. Allegra loves to travel and claims she has a rich benefactor which explains the houses in her name dotting the coast lands from the Greek islands all the way down to the Maldives. Her favourite home however is a small yacht she purchased to travel in, which is almost always hosting a party onboard. Despite her lifestyle and her openness to embrace new friends, little is truly known about Allegra. She died in 2008 on June 6 when Soputan erupted in Sulawesi, her body never recovered. Some say a flying saucer passed over head that same day.

NIAMH BERTRUN: verse; Post Library ( arc: Gloria, did you finally see that enough is enough? )

Name meaning: In Irish mythology, Niamh is the daughter of the god of the sea. Bertrun from the ancient Germanic name means secret lore. Put together, the literal translation is, secret song. Occupation: Museum Curator. Qualifications: Double degree in Archaeology and Paleoecology, Queen's University, Belfast. Time zone: Ireland 2010 -2026. Nationality: Irish.( Born in Zimbabwe ) Fictional Biography: Unlike Allegra, Niamh was quiet, reserved, the kind of woman who entered a room last, and left first. Little is known about her save two facts. Niamh Bertrun doesn't let anyone close enough to know her truths, and she certainly wouldn't want to. A museum curator by trade, she has scarcely left Ireland. Indeed the furthermost point she's gone is to travel down to Dublin where she now resides. She owns a house in the country, away from everyone and everything. She went missing over a weekend in late May of 2026, her absence only missed the following Monday when she failed to turn up at the Museum. Her colleagues reported her missing and it was thoroughly investigated by police, but the trail ran cold. Curiously, footage has unearthed nearby of a police box appearing beside the local pub around the time she disappeared.

[capseycartwright]

there’s no solidarity more beautiful than a pub full of irish and scottish people drowning out the few english people by booing down god save the king with a passion that can only be admired

[thedurvin]

Why is it American cities will usually have at least one Irish pub but I’ve never seen a Scottish one? Or Welsh?

[hawkzeyes]

That one pub that got a review saying that they “as an Englishman felt uncomfortable because there were so many Irish, Scottish, Welsh, and French flags for six nations and only one English flag” was so iconic for responding “oh thank you for letting me know! I’ll remove that immediately” and ripping the flag down 😭💀