#i made a garland for her head. and bracelets too. and fragrant zone; ... headcanons

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Just some River & UNIT headcanons

She is their 5th and 17th Archaeological Consultant respectively, under the aliases of Melodie Williams (active alias in the 70's-80's ) and River Allegro ( current alias ) respectively.

they know Professor Allegro and River S.ong are the same person. But they are completely unaware that Melodie is also her. She's gone through great pains to make sure of that, doctored evidence, removed photographs.

notoriously difficult to work with, thinks a lot of her peers archaeological practices are outdated ( by her time, they are )

at last count, she's made 56 inquiries into her eligibility for a widow's pension, as the Doctor's wife.

originally Allegro was very reluctant to join up again, she'd only come to get her shoes back.

will not hesitate to namedrop whenever she's caught breaking in somewhere she's not supposed to be. oh she's in trouble? try her. she has Eddy on speed dial. and O.sgood too. she's not allowed Kate's number.

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River lies about her age all the time, but unlike the Doctor it's a bit more subtle. She'll say she's 300 but really she's more like 345 and rounded down to the nearest 100. But if you call her out on it, she'll tell you it's your fault bc how dare you ask a woman her age!?

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I feel like I have to discuss this before I forget? but I don't count name of the doctor as canon for my portrayal for three reasons. 1. Yes River would end up hating a lot of aspects of the library. The entire situation is bittersweet for her. I give her a time frame of 300 years in the datacore too & no one would wanna be stuck in a computer for that amount of time. But she would rather die again than to admit that to the Doctor's face. 2. The end of her appearance in that episode implies that she just fades away and for obvious reasons, that contradicts the post library verse. The other option is that she fades back INTO the library and I don't really like that either? 3. Doctor Moon is the Doctor. and if he is then lets be real she would NOT be over there crying to 11 about being left like a book on the shelf. What book, what shelf? Colin S.almon is her husband now. ( Listen I want you all to know I was so against this idea when C initially mentioned that M.offat and & R.TD have both stated this, but I have been won over. I'm cured. )

But all of this does not mean I do not acknowledge the episode as a whole. Clara still goes into the Doctor's timestream, ( unless this doesn't happen in your canon, we'll work out something else ) River's still there at the conference call, Clara can still see her bc they're psychically linked but the Doctor cannot.

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sad headcanon time: basically in my canon pretty much everyone else in the datacore ( except Dr Moon bc ofc Moffat and RTD both stated he is in fact a future incarnation of the doctor. ) die during the process which extracts river's consciousness.

It's the reason Post library River will put off crossing her own time line in order to orchestrate her own resurrection, because of the immense guilt she carries thinking that CAL and her team will die because of her.

It's not until much later in her life when she realises the firewall had fallen and that it was not her transfer that killed everyone but a slow moving virus uploaded to the database days before.

Unlike the others, any doppleganger created from her DNA still has the ability to regenerate and limit the effects of the virus. Meaning that even if she tried to rescue the others like she did herself, they could not survive a transfer out of the database.

Comforted by the knowledge that she did not cause their deaths, River does the only thing she can for them, which is to erase them before the virus can consume them. It's a painless process and she allows them each a proper goodbye before she does it, giving them all the choice. CAL was the last to go. River will always love them and she cherishes the time they spent in the datacore together.

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time machine : if your muse was given the chance to back in time once , would they take it ? if so , what would they do ? revisit a beloved memory , attempt to change something , or something else ? / i know that this is a funny question considering but the key word here is the once. at the end of it all she gets one trip. what does she do.

The first thought would be of her parents, no matter the incarnation. They lost the chance to raise her as their daughter, and even though she tried to fill that void by growing up alongside them as Mels it's still not enough. She lost the chance to be raised by them.

I think she would consider going to Manhattan again after she leaves the library, partly because she's missed Amy & Rory so much, but also, she desperately wants to regain her memories and she thinks that being with the people she loves might bring it all back. But ultimately she would decide against it, because finding them again, explaining what had happened, starting a new relationship with them? It's all too much to put on them. She knows as well, that eventually she will lose them all over again and she can't bear to go through it again.

But she wouldn't change anything either. Not one line. No matter the hurt or the pain she and everyone else has undergone, the timelines have to stay fixed. There's always consequences for meddling in time.

So where does she go? I think she picks a memory instead. A moment in time where they're all completely at peace. She picks the time in the back garden, just after she's climbed out of the Byzantium and time has righted itself. She watches them from a distance, Amy, Rory, her past self, absolutely euphoric, dancing in the dark. It's a happy yet bitter experience.

MUSE  QUESTIONS  !an  array  of  varied  muse  questions // accepting.

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❝ That´s my favourite sort of art, ❞ crimson stained lips drew back , exposing a toothy grin. ¨what, grim? disturbing? barking mad? ¨ She rolled her eyes at the assumption. ❝ The one´s that leave you with a visceral thrill. If art doesn´t terrify you a little then it´s positively boring in my opinion darling. Géricault understood that. But then the French love a good drama. ❞ Anita yawned, giving her a playful push." nah, give me a good Warhol any d....River, do you see that?¨

The holo-image shimmered, tiny ripples forming at the centre of the canvas that began to radiate outwards, off of the painting and onto the wall. Growing, ever growing and morphing the space it touched. In the blink of an eye the Raft of Medusa came to look more and more warped, lines blurring together, painted strokes becoming smatterings. ❝ Find CAL and the others, QUICKLY! ❞

On the eve of the 300th anniversary of the Library disaster, an unknown person/s? broke through the sealed defences and extracted the consciousnesses of Professor River Song from the database. The Vashta Nerada, having resorted to cannibalising to survive, had long since died out. As a result of CAL and the Doctor Moon´s intervention, the transfer was a disaster, deleting everyone in the process and rendering the Professor, her body transferred to a fresh doppleganger host, with a virus whose symptoms were not unlike selective amnesia.

The intruder, for reasons unknown, abandoned her before she awoke, leaving her utterly alone in her new life. Paranoia soon set in, and, believing that Madame Kovarian and the Silence may have played a terrible part in her apparent resurrection, River set off to the place where she had left her last ( AUDIO: The Furies ) her suspicions only deepened when she found Kovarian gone. With no clues to go on and no clear indication of her memories returning, River abandoned the search for her past.

Frustrated, alone, and still coming to terms with having been dead for three centuries, River focused her efforts on trying to move forward instead. During a 10 year period, she settled on several small planets, went through 16 different careers and an impressive 30 residences. Nothing stuck.

Soon after, by complete coincidence she found her way back to the final cluster and witnessed first hand the devastation that King Hydroflax´s presence had had on this sector of the galaxy some 12 years after his demise. With no apparent successor to claim the throne, she did the natural thing, and claimed it as his widow. It was an easy enough feat, war having devastated the galaxy, there were none left who would have known her previous incarnation. In healing the final cluster, she healed her own wounds too. but peace never lasts.

Many species converged on the galaxy, believing the truce had made them weak, cybermen, weeping angels, sontaran´s just to name a few, horde upon horde upon horde, never ending. By the year 5203 the final cluster had been utterly decimated. River herself appeared to have died again, her Halassi spaceship crashing off the west coast of Cering IV. She survived of course and after being stranded for 3 days, managed to infiltrate an enemy supply ship on it´s way back to base. Successfully commandeering the ship, it´s crew tied up in a cleaner´s closet, she instead landed on a nearby space station. The wounds she had acquired, coupled by the sheer mental will it took to make it out alive, left her gravelly ill. Unfamiliar with her genetic makeup, the station had her transferred to the sisters of the infinite schism.

The sisters healed not only her injured but worked their science and found a slow working antidote to the virus she suffered from. They urged her to revisit her past, assuring her that the memories would come back in time. She took their advice and after volunteering on a dig, fell back in love with Archaeology. With a mixture of doctored and very real credentials, she fast tracked her career and became the new head of the Antiquities department at Luna University precisely 5 months after her previous incarnation disappeared on the Library expedition.

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KNOWN ALIASES, PART TWO:

Over the years, River has taken up many new aliases out of necessity, Sister Cantica, Miss Spritz, River Allegro. The list is as endless as it is frankly, obvious, which serves the dual purpose of being easy to remember and, a private joke she can enjoy. Of the many, many names, there are four that she finds herself coming back to over the years.Though these particular aliases are active for a long period of time, it does not mean that she lived linearly, keeping careful note of when it was safe to jump back and forwards between her own time-stream.

Here are the final two of those aliases ...

ALLEGRA MARLOWE verse; Post Library ( arc: I could take the whole world with me. )

Name meaning: Allegra typically means joy or lively in the original Italian. She chose it for it's semblance to Allegro however. ( musical term ) Marlowe she chose for it's French origins, meaning from the hill by the lake. Occupation: Anthropologist Qualifications: Doctorate in Anthropology, University of Edinburgh Time zone: Europe/Asia 1980-2008 Nationality: Scottish. Fictional Biography: Allegra comes from a very loving home in Scotland, where her mother supposedly still resides. She is most probably human ( her words ) and not not from around here. Allegra loves to travel and claims she has a rich benefactor which explains the houses in her name dotting the coast lands from the Greek islands all the way down to the Maldives. Her favourite home however is a small yacht she purchased to travel in, which is almost always hosting a party onboard. Despite her lifestyle and her openness to embrace new friends, little is truly known about Allegra. She died in 2008 on June 6 when Soputan erupted in Sulawesi, her body never recovered. Some say a flying saucer passed over head that same day.

NIAMH BERTRUN: verse; Post Library ( arc: Gloria, did you finally see that enough is enough? )

Name meaning: In Irish mythology, Niamh is the daughter of the god of the sea. Bertrun from the ancient Germanic name means secret lore. Put together, the literal translation is, secret song. Occupation: Museum Curator. Qualifications: Double degree in Archaeology and Paleoecology, Queen's University, Belfast. Time zone: Ireland 2010 -2026. Nationality: Irish.( Born in Zimbabwe ) Fictional Biography: Unlike Allegra, Niamh was quiet, reserved, the kind of woman who entered a room last, and left first. Little is known about her save two facts. Niamh Bertrun doesn't let anyone close enough to know her truths, and she certainly wouldn't want to. A museum curator by trade, she has scarcely left Ireland. Indeed the furthermost point she's gone is to travel down to Dublin where she now resides. She owns a house in the country, away from everyone and everything. She went missing over a weekend in late May of 2026, her absence only missed the following Monday when she failed to turn up at the Museum. Her colleagues reported her missing and it was thoroughly investigated by police, but the trail ran cold. Curiously, footage has unearthed nearby of a police box appearing beside the local pub around the time she disappeared.

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Just some Kala's Guard Universe!River headcanons

She's on her 7th incarnation. She mentions in the audio that Demon's Run has been a long time ago for her, I'd say it's about a millennium for her. She never formed an attachment to the Doctor or her Parents.

She still poisoned the Doctor. But she achieved it by playing a long con, pretending to be their ally across their multiple incarnations. The poison was something she manufactured herself. She learnt under Giulia Tofana before going out into the universe to research for herself and found a plant that could in fact disable regenerative properties.

While initially famous for that murder, she would go on to be known for many others, now an expert assassin. Poison is still her weapon of choice, she's very skilled at it and has accumulated even more knowledge than her alternate self.

After meeting her alternate self she would go on to settle down for a while, becoming a botanist. She only abandoned this position when she regenerated once more

Her list of incarnations includes: Danai Gurira (4th ), Mozhan Marno ( 5th ) Naomie Harris ( 6th ) with Mimi Khayisa as her 7th and current face.

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with the exception of one Professor ( i will discuss her again later, if you know, you know. ) luna faculty/admin ect outside of her dept are terrified of river. When they employ a new person they give them the tour of every dept and then that person asks 'what about that department over there, classics and antiquities?' and everyone's face freezes 'that's professor song's department, you must never go there.'

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River carrying around pictures of the Doctor's faces is a relatively new thing to her by the time THORS rolls around, she does it out of necessity so she'll never be fooled again the way she was in Signs, which is partly why she refuses to entertain any possibility that 12 is the Doctor until the end.

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KNOWN ALIASES, PART ONE:

Over the years, River has taken up many new aliases out of necessity, Sister Cantica, Miss Spritz, River Allegro. The list is as endless as it is frankly, obvious, which serves the dual purpose of being easy to remember and, a private joke she can enjoy. Of the many, many names, there are four that she finds herself coming back to over the years. Though these particular aliases were active for a long period of time, it does not mean that she lived linearly. Rather she would keep careful note of when it was safe to jump back and forwards between her own time-stream.

The following are two such names:

MELODY MALONE: verse; Manhattan's Angel ( arc: Heaven, help me now, Heaven, show the way )

Name meaning: Melody, Modern English derived from the Greek Melodia. Malone  is an Irish surname. From the Irish "Mael Eóin", the name means a servant or a disciple of Saint John. Occupation: Private Investigator /occasional author. Qualifications: P.I License Time zone: New York 1936-50. Nationality: British. cosmopolitan Fictional Biography: Melody Malone was born at an undisclosed time in an undisclosed place in the year [redacted.] Of what little is known about Melody, it is rumoured she has a famous archaeologist for a twin sister. (PROSE: The Ruby's Curse ) As a PI Melody chooses to focus on more obscure cases, the stranger, the better. ( PROSE: The Angel's Kiss ) She vanished quite as suddenly as she had appeared in on new years eve 1950 in the middle of a party, simply walking out into the street and never reappearing. Her personal things were retrieved from her flat in Manhattan and forwarded to a couple named Williams, believed to be distant relatives of hers.

MELODIE WILLIAMS verse; la belle dame sans merci ( arc: I would lie awake and pray you don't lie awake for me )

Name Meaning: The name Melodie is primarily of French origin that means Song, Melody. Williams, she named herself after her father's surname. Occupation: Professor Of Archaeology, specialising in pre-history. Qualifications: Doctorate in Archaeology, from the Sorbonne. Time Zone: Everywhere on Earth 1950-1980. Nationality: French. Fictional Biography: Melodie was born to a normal family with a dog and a large backyard just outside Bordeaux. She loved to dig up old coins in the yard alongside her pet dog, which lead to her passion to become an archaeologist, or so she tells people whenever they ask. For reasons unknown to most, she sometimes assists certain organisations requiring information on prehistoric finds of an alien nature. This agreement has meant travelling pretty much all of the world at someone else's expense, which suits her just fine. Despite being French, she sounds oddly British, which she attributes to being sent away to a London boarding school when she was younger. Melodie owns a house in Marseille and another small flat in Paris, though she is reluctant to explain just how she affords them. Just Like Ms Malone, Professor Melodie Williams disappeared quite suddenly as well in 1980 on an unnamed digsite. Witnesses claim she literally vanished in a puff of smoke.

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RE: Perception is everything.

no fancy graphic for this one, but i think it's important to note that River has very carefully crafted the image/s for herself that she wants people to see. What I mean is, everything, down to what she wears, how she speaks, what emotion she conveys in certain situation, is more often than not a very deliberate choice.

. PRE- LIBRARY

We see this several times in canon. The most prominent instance is when she goes as far to break her own wrist and keep it a secret from the Doctor and Amy. ( TV: The angels take Manhattan ) When Amy asks her why she lied her response is 'Never let him see the damage.' why? because she would rather the Doctor have the illusion of hope than admit defeat. That he thinks River Song can miraculously change the future.

But even when the Doctor or her parents aren't around, this cultivated image of an amazing, awe-inspiring figure never ceases. You'd never catch her out under dressed, she's not the type to lounge around in her pyjamas in her living room all day, this is a woman who dresses to the nines to slink around in the dead of the night playing private eye in New York in the 30's, explodes an airlock and get's thrown out into space in a full evening gown and a pair of platform heels. The woman who jumps from buildings looking like she's stepped out of the pages of vogue, or climbs out a wrecked spaceship only after she's put on a fresh face of makeup.

She also very clearly tones down how vicious she can really be when she's around both the Doctor and her parents. This is the another facet of that persona, a woman that, in everyone's eyes, has come away from her time with the silence completely unscathed. Its something that the Doctor notes. ( TV: The husbands of River Song )

DOCTOR: Is this what you're like when I'm not RIVER: Not what? DOCTOR: You're talking about murdering someone. RIVER: No, I'm not. I'm actually murdering someone.

We see her happy to abandon, maim or murder anyone who gets in her way the entire episode right up until the man who's seen her do all of this is revealed to be the Doctor and then suddenly, she cares about the fact that the spaceships crashing with everyone onboard. She's not willing to show The Doctor her true face, regardless of everything the Doctor themselves has done, or the fact that the Doctor now knows what she's really like and I strongly believe it's not something that she can control at that point. It's become a reflex.

She loathes it when anyone sees behind this persona she's constructed, which is one of the reasons she never sticks around long enough for anyone to catch on. In her eyes, being anything less than perfect is a weakness. When she thinks she is dying of radiation poisoning, ( AUDIO: Signs ) she is extremely frustrated at herself for showing any signs of illness, and frequently pushes herself to do more than she possibly can. Even sleep is regarded as a weakness to her. When it's later revealed that it's in fact copies of herself with her own consciousness attached that have been dying in her place, she's very quick to dismiss them as weak copies of her. She has no pity for them, they didn't escape the way she did.

. POST LIBRARY

Post library River's mind fluctuates between dropping these tendencies and bringing them back with twice the strength depending where in her timeline she is, though she shows some self awareness in the sense that she acknowledges it's an unhealthy trait.

At first. while she still had gaps in her memory, she still wouldn't be caught dead ( again ) in anything less than her very best, whether she was in the field or the next big gala. She can still be very critical of herself sometimes if she shows weakness as well. She was particularly frustrated at herself for not remembering certain things, and remained that way right up until the fall of the final cluster. ( see this headcanon )

The image she crafts often extends to her aliases. ( this headcanon) They all have their respective backstories, she goes as far as to either complete an entirely new degree, or she'll doctor one if she already has the credentials from somewhere else, just to keep up appearances. Eventually, years after after the gradual loss of her entire department at Luna University, her subsequent resignation and self imposed exile form the universe, she realises she needs to make a change, or she'll meet the exact same demise that her previous incarnation met. From here on out she actively strives to dismantle these personas she's created.

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mind  :  how  does  their  mind  think  and  process  information  ?  like  a  human  brain  ,  a  computer  ?  something  else  ,  or  both  ?

. ( Thanks to @talentforlying for also asking <3 ) River isn't completely human, she was genetically engineered by the silence and they wanted to use her to kill a Time Lord of all people, so of course she had to be able to keep up with one.

Where something is her area of expertise, archaeology for example, she processes things at an extremely fast rate, almost like a computer. It's important to note that she has also been alive for much longer than the average human and that unlike a human mind, she has retains the knowledge of those years. In saying that, she does have limits.

Where she's not in control of a situation, facing something she has no idea about, you'll see me refer to it as 'flipping through her mental rolodex' or something similar because her thought process is exactly that. She's shuffling through the vast array of information already at her disposal to make sense of what's happening. Now, River is an especially proud person, she knows she's clever and she absolutely likes to lord it over people, which is why her partial memory loss during her transfer out of the library ( see this headcanon for more info ) is such a frustrating experience for her. It's not even a case of, having to re-learn everything. Some knowledge was completely erased, other things are partially missing in themselves and then there's the knowledge she can recall, but not how she knows it. Until the time she regains that knowledge she always feels like a piece of her is missing.

MUSE  QUESTIONS  !an  array  of  varied  muse  questions // accepting.

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❝ Boredom can be a problem, but I’ve taken it as an opportunity rather than a drawback, and thrown myself into archaeological research. Long distance, of course, but with even with the obsolete holographic technology they have at Stormcage (so archaic it almost counts as an archaeological project in its own right) it’s honestly almost like being on site watching the work being done. ❞ ( PROSE: River of Time )

While Mels Zucker had had a deep appreciation for History ( though not for her history teacher ) it wasn´t until her third regeneration into River Song that she considered a career in Archaeology. It appealed to her for many reasons, she had a natural instinct to investigate, but in a more symbolic way she also felt that in her heart that she was lacking roots, history of her own.

Once she left the sister´s of the infinite schism ( TV: LKH ) River sought out the prestigious Luna University and despite not meeting the entry requirements she managed to impress the head of the Classics & Antiquities Department into allowing her to study. Though initially very fond of her, Professor Artrem Candy would soon come to regret taking her under his wing. Candy, who had previously worked alongside Professor Bernice Summerfield, harboured a very negative attitude towards the Doctor, something that came up frequently in his lectures. As a result he & River frequently clashed over this. She also had a very well balanced social and academic life at Luna, something that irked her fellow student Jemima Still. ( AUDIO: Time in a Bottle ) Jemima was incredibly jealous of River´s popularity amongst peers and lecturers alike and often quarrelled with her. Despite these obstacles, River excelled at her studies in all other aspects.

By the time she had completed her undergraduate she had developed an interest in a relatively new branch of study, Primordial Archaeology, the study of societies that began before time, or just after the big bang. To her annoyance, her rival, Jemima Still also chose to pursue higher studies in the same subject. Both River and Jemima got along fairly well with their Professor Kuyili Acharya, who would pass away while on an expedition approximately 8 years after they both graduated.

During this time, River had been kidnapped once more by the silence, ´murdered´ the Doctor and been incarcerated in the StormCage Containment Facility after a very quick, very private trial. She published several hundred papers during this time and a handful of books, and though Storm Cage would later deny it, attended several digs and headed expeditions during this time. In a career where some took their entire life to accomplish what she had, River was the natural choice to succeed her old Professor and had in fact given several guest lectures at Luna through the years. But Artrem Candy remained the head of the department, and his opinions of her had not swayed over. To River´s utter disappointment, her old rival Jemima Still was offered the position instead, though upon meeting up with Jemima again later, she would feign indifference to the appointment.

All was not lost, she would soon have tenure at the Sorbonne in the 31st Century instead, where she stayed for many years in many different timelines. ( AUDIO: The Sonomancer. ) Her tenure here is one marked with controversy, while her work on the ruins of Razbahan ( TV: TOA ) was largely applauded, citing the rapid expansion of Razbahan from several small chieftains to a vast city state in under 20 years and it´s subsequent brutal fall, as the work of the weeping Angels, her theories on the Liperian system and the involvement of the Discordia ( AUDIO: TDORS VOL 4 ) was met with immense scrutiny. Particularly so because both her old rival Jemima and Jemima´s husband Melak mysteriously vanished during an expedition that she was known to be part of. Whispers followed her, questioning her mysterious murder trial. Some were convinced she´d murdered the Stills as well. Despite this, she was finally offered Jemima´s old position at Luna, though she would later find out the appointment had been ´gently suggested´ by the college board as her presence generated unusually high interest for the department. Unbeknown to many, the adventure with the Discordia had left her deeply scarred, she refused to take on research assistants that weren´t robots for a very long time afterwards.

The faculty on the other hand, she took less than no time to befriend and work closely alongside. she was particularly fond of Maritime Archaeology expert Dr Michael Themba and Paleoethnobotanist Annie-Lee Belrose with whom she worked closely with on a shared expedition into the sunken remains of a primordial alien spacecraft that had crashed in Kilwa, Earth in the 9th Century.

Occasionally she was known to branch out of her own discipline, if the circumstances called for it ( the Ruby´s Curse, Anteria XVI Cordobane, ect )

After a time the rumours that had plagued her before died down. When Artrem Candy ( or his clone? there were rumours ) passed away, she was thoroughly surprised to find that she had been his choice to succeed him as the head of the department.

Under her direction the Department of Classics & Antiquities flourished, at least up until Manhattan happened. The loss of her parents took more or a toll on her than she let and her grief began to effect her work, she became increasingly erratic, frequently didn´t turn up to her own lectures, clashed with the board and other lecturers on campus. Eventually, she realised she needed time away and left on sabbatical, roaming the universe for a time aimlessly before settling in early 20th Century Earth to write.

Unfortunately, she ended up entangled with the self proclaimed rulers of the universe ( AUDIO: TDORS VOL 1. ) She emerged, shaken further by the events of that adventure, but her published work on the Sporeships would be all anyone could talk about. Always one to bounce back from an ordeal, River quickly took advantage of her fame, she would head a large number of expeditions in the following years. Unfortunately, the last one to the Library would cost her her life.

But not everything ends. Not always.As River Allegro, she only further cemented her place as one of the greatest Archaeological minds the universe had seen, her reign as the Head of department saw the development of new surveying and dig technology using nanobots, which she introduced into the early 25th century. Her book on the interconnections between Primordial Civilisations also proved to be a hit, though controversial amongst some of older colleagues who were loathe to such a fresh take. She stayed at Luna for some time, but sadly that too started to take it´s toll, her colleagues did not have the same augmented lifespan as she and one by one they passed away around her. She would eventually give up her place and leave Luna, working as a guest lecturer in between digs instead.

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. what kind of herb are you?

. Dandelion

You grew up too fast and all you know is the calluses on your fists and the thousand invisible scars that you pretend don't ache. Your anger burns so bright, so hot or maybe not at all, so deep you could never tell it was there. You are yours and you will defend that to the death after so many years of being ripped apart and denied your own agency and maybe you are still facing the bastards who stole your innocence but you will survive because that's the only thing you know how to do without breaking, the only thing you know besides protect, protect, protect, protect, yourself or sometimes those few others you claim as yours. You are a thousand sharp edges but impenetrable, a traumatized child so covered by thorny armor that you promised yourself you're grown now, you're stronger than anyone who has ever hurt you. You're safe. Nothing will ever hurt you again. You're so alone though sometimes, in a world that sees you as too much or too broken or too angry or too hurt, and you want to scream with the too-much of it, prove that you're okay, that you're self-reliant, that you are strong enough to stake your claim on your body, on your mind, on your heart, on your people, and protect it from any who dare take it away from you. You are the sea in tempest, a howling sky, a tsunami in motion, a force of nature, no matter how much you sometimes yearn to be still, to be safe, to be small. You are a dandelion, stubborn and determined to grow in the rockiest of soil, and bloom again in spring.

tagged by @whatspoilers tagging: anyone, everyone oh my god just do it besties, trust me.

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❝ New York growled at my window. But I was ready for it. My stocking seams were straight. My lipstick was combat-ready .....❞ ( PROSE: The Angel´s Kiss )

River´s obsession with luxury and fashion in particular stems from a neglected childhood. For the first four years of her life Melody Pond was raised solely by Madame Kovarian, who did bestow upon her some level of care. However, as the war on Trenzalore continued to go badly, she was shunted into the care of Dr Renfrew, custodian of GreyStark Hall. Due to the Silence´s tampering, Renfrew frequently forgot her existence, resulting in Melody going without the basic necessities. There were times she would go without food for days, resorting to breaking into the sparse kitchen herself. Clothes that were torn or outgrown she would have to live with much longer and often went barefoot because she would outgrow her shoes.

When Melody Pond finally escaped the silence in mid 1969, rather than improving, her situation would only become worse. Miraculously, by November 1969 she had found her way to New York, where she lived on the streets, begging or else scavenging for food. She took notice of the people who passed her on the street, envious of their rich furs and fabrics, longing for the shoes they wore and the food wafting over from the restaurants they ate at. Soon after arriving in New York, Melody contracted an unknown disease in early December and by New Years, the disease had consumed her. Melody Pond died in an alleyway that night, giving way to Melody ´Mels´ Zucker to do things differently.

As Mels aged, she was determined to do better than her predecessor. Having to move constantly due to her insistence on never physically growing, Mels bounced between different foster homes and orphanages up until the day she made it to Leadworth. There she settled with a foster family close to Amy Pond´s house, but the years had left her extremely frustrated at having so little to call her own. As soon as could, she began working, saving as much as she could, looking for better opportunities and climbing the ladder wherever possible. Her work paid off and by the time she was just physically 20 years old she had landed a high paying job as a management consultant. ( PROSE: River Of Time, Andrew Lane )

It was from there that Melody began to indulge in all the things she´d never had. Her first luxury purchase was a vintage Moschino handbag which she wore everywhere until the straps frayed and gave out, she drove all the way to London just to purchase it and was the envy of Leadworth for months. After that, the love affair with luxury fashion only grew. Mels favoured small pieces from Balenciaga, Gucci and Coach and the occasional jewellery from Burberry. She would mix these pieces with clothing from lesser brands as well, Guess, Nike & Adidas. Perfumes she constantly changed, though she mainly favoured fresh or citrus notes. As much as she loved her newfound wealth, the feeling constantly gnawed at Mels that it wasn´t enough. She was never truly satisfied.

River Song would soon change that for her. regenerating into a more mature figure left her with different tastes, but did nothing to diminish her love of fashion. River had access to time travel and a knack for lock picking, conning banks and many other talents. At last, she had access to the large volumes of cash little Melody pond could never have imagined in a million years. The need to establish herself,to indulge in wealth, could not be shaken, particularly as her career often resulted in the very un-glamorous look of wading knee-deep in alien mud. She held several wardrobes stashed away at various residences and her clothes were either snatched off the rack from the back of Chanel fashion shows, or else sensibly purchased in the case of the Hermès, Armani and Dior pieces she now owned. Shoes she owned in the hundreds, favouring Louboutin for their pumps, Manolo for strappy heels and for everything else? there was Yves Saint Laurent. For jewellery River wasn´t as choosy or as loyal, though her absolute favourites was Cartier, she owned a few Vivienne Westwood statement pieces that she was also fond of. For Perfumes, she favoured more amber notes and again, wasn´t as fussy on brand. Though they were all ´vintage´ to her she had several rare pieces in her wardrobe from various time periods as well. Because this regeneration lived as long as she did, she was able to find the cohesiveness that Mels had also wished for, maintaining her sense of style without change for many years.

But inevitably, she would regenerate again during her escape from the library database and so would her sense of style. River Allegro, having lived for centuries in the database without a need to show off her wealth to anyone, had a much healthier relationship with fashion than her predecessor. She did still own several pieces from various designer brands however. This incarnation favoured Oscar De La Renta and Vera Wang. Her love of shoes still continued as did the brands she favoured but these items were all only used for special occasions rather than every day wear. For jewellery, Tiffany´s was a must and for perfume she was prone to more floral notes. Though she had changed over the centuries, she never forgot how much style had meant to her predecessors, honouring that in her own humorous way. In the living room of her house, encased in glass and sunk into a transparent coffee table, are the original Louboutin Bianca platform´s she wore onboard the Byzantium and same Moschino handbag she once owned as Mels, repurchased after she lost it many centuries ago.