#Ill keep editing this as I fix the formatting

[sensenotsense]

if anyone wants to know about my ocs my ask box is always open :0 or draw requests or oc memes

[gatsby-system-folks]

Hi besties

I didn't feel like deleting this commission post. Thankfully, the friend who I opened commissions to help has stable housing now. I'm not saying commissions closed, I'm just busy lol.

Illustration:

Some examples of my work

I'll also do relatively short comics. This is a snippet from my webcomic. A sketch is $10, colored sketch is $15, lineart is $10, colored lineart is $15. Shading or lighting on anything will add $10. I'm not separating character art and landscape art, both have the same rate, but something with more than 5 characters or something set in a city (or otherwise densely populated/elaborate area) will be a little more ($5 for every character above 5, and an extra $10 for an elaborate scene). Comics are the same, each page (not each panel) will be treated as a piece.

Writing:

I'll write for ocs, and from:

Homestar Runner

Rise of the tmnt

The Usagi Chronicles

Gorillaz

Good Omens

Undertale/Deltarune

Homestuck (and its affiliates, such as pesterquest or friendsim)

Venom

Moon Knight

Treasure Planet

Hellboy

Doctor Who

Our Flag Means Death

The Chronicles of Narnia

The Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit

The original 6 Star Wars movies

The Spiderverse series, itsv and atsv

The Davina skit from Rab C Nesbitt. (I see yall shipping Davina with Mrs. Robinson and I love yall)

If something's not on this list, you can still ask, and if I've seen whatever the media is I'll probably write it. On the other hand, if i haven't seen all of the content for the medias listed above, I'll have to do some research so it might not be the best work (ie the only reason I'm limiting this to the first 6 star wars movies is because I haven't seen any more than that)

I'll do ships between canon characters or between ocs, I'm not comfortable doing x reader content at this point. Also.. they don't have to be ships lol I also do just. Fics.

Some examples of my work:

I'm gonna keep it simple and do $20 per thousand words, but there's not a minimum word count. That's $0.02 per word lol. When you describe the fic ill give you an estimate of how many words I can do it in, and we can adjust. If the fic goes more than 150 words over the final estimate then it's flat-rate (as in the price doesn't continue to climb)

Poetry

Any subject really. I'll add examples of my work when the website I post on is fixed. Poetry is twice the price of fic

Editing:

Keep it under 5,000 words for now. $8 per hour. I'll edit fic, essays, etc.

Worldbuilding:

If you need help figuring out a magic system, how pipes connect your city, weird biological facts about your aliens, or even just where to put the castle parking lot, I can help. Same rules of fic writing and editing: if we chat worldbuilding for an hour, it'll be $8. If you want a 500 word summary of your new worlbuilding, that'll be $10. The text of the chat of course is free, you can pause your time of course, and whatever time I spend writing the summary isn't double charged. So an hour of chatting+ a 500 word summary would be $18

What I won't work with, in any format

Heavy nsfw- light is ok

Incest, pedophilia, noncon etc

Hate, bigotry, overly political work, bullying

Torture

Glorification of not good things. Depiction does not equal glorification

Case by case: real, living people. Context below.

What I won't draw, specifically:

Gore

abuse (such as beating, verbal, emotional)

Self harm

Everything is case-by-case, if something makes me uncomfortable I'm not going to do it. You may not put my work into an ai scraper of any kind. Also I'll say it again, depiction does not equal glorification.

Context on real people: I mean if you want me to just draw a picture of Margot Robbie that's most likely fine, or write about the wacky secret society that Laura Ingals and St. Patrick were running that's probably fine, or if a real living person appears in the background that's probably fine (I see you good omens fans having Crowley and Hozier hang out at a bar), but I won't write shipping for real, currently living people, nor will i make them the mc of a story. I'd prefer not for dead people either, but that's not a hard rule. Once again, case by case.

[fraternum-momentum]

Okay, so let me ramble abt making the last comic, cause that was an absolute behemoth to work on, and I have a lot of thoughts in my head. Man, I don't know how those webtoon artists do it every week. They scare me now.

This is super long btw, so get cozy if you want to read :]

Starting off, I actually got this idea from my lil 'ol diary I keep by my tableside :] I like writing down what I feel so I can see it in a more concrete(?) manner, helps me cope i think. One time, I really did cry for someone because I guess I just really liked them a lot. Having crushes is fun, but catching feelings isn't.

I always get this giddy feeling of being head over heels for someone. Every interaction is so exciting. Intoxicating even. And I couldn't get enough of it, but after that few seconds of bliss I immediately think to myself that all these scenarios in my head will never happen, not in a million fucking years. I just preemptively reject myself without ever telling the person what I feel. I know what the outcome will be anyway, and I'm afraid of what will happen if I did say anything. It's just too risky.

The second half is completely made up tho, I will never ever kidnap someone... unless? (For legal reasons, I will have to clarify that this is a joke, Thank you.)

Now onto the comic itself!

The composition is probably the easiest and the most fun part. I love, love, love, how versatile you can be in the webtoon format. Figuring out how to transition the panels is super fun, and it sucks that most of the webcomics I see on tapas or webtoon, etc. are just sticking to those boring box formulas over and over again when it has so much potential, although there are exceptions like, for example, Lore Olympus. While it has it's fair share of flaws when in comes to other aspects, you can't deny the artist's talent esp when it comes to knowing how to place the character in an illustration, (again) the compositioning etc etc. (ep. 8 is p good. They stick to the box stuff during dialogue but gets more experimental in some parts. I haven't been keeping up with it, so idk any other good eps)

One of my only big regrets is that I wish I had made the space between the '...but I love it." and "And soon..." parts longer. I think it changed scenarios way too fast and your eye immediately moves onto the next piece of text,, but eh, it is what it is, and I can't be bothered to edit it so ig I gotta learn to live with it.

It's still messy in,, a lot of parts actually, and I still can't do lineart to save my life, but i kinda tried just cleaning up the sketches instead???? I mean, it kinda works, but it isn't really smooth so,, And there are small mistakes here and there that I could've fixed or colored stuff in properly or whatever. But at that point, I'm just done with it. No more. Am tired and want to draw other shit now. Maybe boobs n dicks n pussy-

Oh actually i have another comic in my wip folder that I started before the sad Kylar crying one. Here's some of the thumbnails for it:

the fucking lisa simpson looking ass face just cracks me up every time I see it LMAOQJSJQJ I just wanted to show it to u but stay tuned for that ig

I eventually want to make little comics like this for other characters as well! Like Sydney, who is also one of my favorites cause of the whole religion aspect to them, and I would like to tackle that topic with yet another super personal experience of mine that for some reason I'm comfortable with sharing with a bunch of ppl lmao

I also really want to make a full on nsfw one, like gut rearranging, carnal fucking, hardcore banging,, ok ill stop. But I do need to do more,, uh, "research" on that,, i swear it's research, i have no clue how im gonna draw it. Hell, I already struggle with drawing people fucking and imagine adding cool transitions to that. Guess even my masochistic tendencies extend to this shit too.

And I think that's pretty much it? I'll probably just stick to b and w or monotone with a few accent colors because i just know that it would break me if i did a fully colored one.

Okay, thank you for reading this ramble, I'll go ahead and answer some asks now,, Here's your prize though!

[ogradyfilm]

Recently Viewed: The Timekeepers of Eternity

[The following review contains MAJOR SPOILERS; YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!]

With The Timekeepers of Eternity, Aristotelis Maragkos accomplishes the impossible: he makes Tom Holland’s The Langoliers watchable.

The experiment is far from perfect, of course; the raw footage is, after all, so fundamentally flawed that no amount of re-editing, remixing, and recontextualization can totally “fix” it (the dialogue, for example, remains infuriatingly nonsensical, plagued by constant inconsistencies, contradictions, and inorganic leaps in logic). Still, by condensing the multi-episode miniseries—a format that is, in my opinion, inherently ill-suited to sustaining a narrative that features only two locations populated by roughly a dozen people—into a comparatively lean hour-long film, Maragkos at the very least addresses the source material’s clunky pacing, trimming a lot of excess fat and bloat.

Don’t get me wrong: I like rich, well-developed characters as much as the next viewer. The meat of this particular conflict, however, lies not in complex interpersonal relationships, but in the novel premise: our protagonists (a ragtag group of airline passengers) find themselves inexplicably stranded in an empty “past” that is rapidly vanishing beneath their feet, and must escape before they are devoured by the metaphysical forces that govern the universe. Although this dilemma is more than substantial enough to keep the audience invested in the action, the ‘95 cut of The Langoliers includes an overabundance of extraneous melodrama that stretches the otherwise straightforward plot to its breaking point, resulting in a severe lack of urgency. The Timekeepers of Eternity, on the other hand, omits nearly every detail that isn’t immediately relevant to the central concept, thus crafting a more economical, suspenseful experience.

But the movie’s remarkable metamorphosis is not merely structural; Maragkos remixes even the visual style. While The Langoliers’ cinematography was perfectly serviceable, it was also rather unambitious and uninspired, betraying its made-for-TV budget. The Timekeepers of Eternity’s shift to black-and-white adds depth and texture to the compositions, evoking the moody, haunting atmosphere of The Twilight Zone. The aesthetic alterations don’t stop with the color palette, either: Maragkos utilizes a variety of digital effects and filters in an effort to depict the story’s somewhat abstract, unconventional approach to “time travel” in literal, concrete terms. The image frequently warps and distorts, fragments and fractures, crumples and tears. Certain scenes are repeated in quick succession; others are truncated or overlap with concurrent events. Beyond contributing to the surreal tone, these expressionistic flourishes are also thematically appropriate, reinforcing the idea that the fragile fabric of reality itself is gradually unraveling around our hapless heroes.

Maragkos’ bold choices aren’t always beneficial; his revised ending is especially egregious, repurposing the original version’s final complication into a cruel, dark twist—an abruptly and arbitrarily nihilistic conclusion that left a bitter taste in my mouth. Nevertheless, the project is ultimately a resounding triumph, redefining the meaning of the term “transformative work.” The Timekeepers of Eternity is no shallow parody—a fan trailer that reimagines Ace Ventura as a tense thriller, or audio clips from Sonic the Hedgehog chopped up and reassembled to make Doctor Robotnik say dirty words; on the contrary, it’s a charmingly sincere reinterpretation (and rehabilitation) of an old, forgotten Stephen King adaptation that is, in retrospect, genuinely deserving of reevaluation. It is, in conclusion, innovative, audacious, and absolutely revolutionary.

[sunenjoyswriting]

A small thing on the idea of Yuune overblotting!

Possible warnings: Body horror (?) & one of the ideas implies death.

Writers note: Made this at 2AM on a kindle. Formatting may seem somewhat different lol. Also please pleaseeeee send me requests about Yuune!! I adore my silly little Yuu!! Ill probably look this over in the morning and fix its issues before releasing it to you all. (Edit: This was now looked over, all typos that I noticed have been fixed & it’s a little more cohesive!)

Yuune would likely overblot due to nobody believing him about this just being a game, and their overblot would more resemble one of the blot creatures (or perhaps more like an abstracted creature from TADC?) instead of the normal overblot look, due to my idea of blot more easily overtaking a magicless body then a magical one. He would just keep on repeating something like "You're all ignorant fools for not believing me", or maybe they'd just stay completely silent. Despite me making this character, I am unsure of whether he’d speak while overblotting… This form would be very painful for them, every second is agony. He would likely lash out at most the TWST characters due to what they've all caused him: keyword "most". They would be nice to Lilia, and perhaps Silver, maybe even the rest of Diasomnia (probably not the rest of Diasomnia, but I can dream!), due to them feeling very emotionally connected to Lilia, like how a child would feel to their father (Lilia really be collecting these children like pokemon, am I right? Laugh track plays in an attempt to make my overused joke appear funny). I believe the only person/fae, that could bring him back from his overblot form would be Lilia, for reasons stated above. If Lilia wasn't able to bring him back, then... Yeah, read the second warning. Once they're back to normal, Yuune would cling to Lilia, and be oddly passive... For a few weeks. Then everything would seem like it goes back to normal, but Yuune is even more traumatized then before and avoids the topic of games as much as possible! Oh, and [[Player]] wouldn't know anything was wrong. They'd just play TWST like normal, unknowing of what was happening behind the screen. Anyways rant over now.

[talkativeanxiousturtle]

AZ: Oh, erm, actually, you might really not want this book. It's a fairly old edition, and there's still-

SH: Still a repeat of the third chapter on page 157 due to a formatting error, I know. It's a very uncommon mistake that they quickly fixed, which makes this specific edition incredibly rare. And it is also exactly why I require it. How much?

AZ (shifting awkwardly): Oh, erm, well... It's not so rare now, is it? I'm sure you could find another copy at the bookshop down the street!

SH: No, actually. We already searched them all, yours is the last resort.

JW: Yeah, that's true, down to the last archived box...

AZ: A-are you sure? It's just that I really quite like this one, and-

SH (suspicious): This is a bookshop, isn't it? You're supposed to sell your books. I don't see how your store could survive if you refuse to part yourself from books, truly it's an ill-conceived business model.

C (protective, leaning forward): Hey, piss off, he told you he wants to keep it.

SH (challenging): And I want to buy it. How. Much?

C: Oh, you want trouble, I'll give ya trouble!

JW (getting between them): Hey there! No need for the attitude, mmh? We're detectives, and we really need this book for a cipher. We couldn't find it elsewhere. A lot of people are at risk here.

AZ (touched): Oh! Oh, no! Of course! Take it, take it, you have to help those poor people!

SH (still huffed): How much?

AZ: Well, since you need it that much, it's free for you!

C (eyeroll): Angel...

JW: Oh, no, we couldn't accept!

SH (impatient, annoyed): Yet, we will! Come now John, the game is back on!

(Sherlock drags John away by the sleeve. John only has time to practically throw a bill at Aziraphale, before they're out the shop. Crowley crosses his arms and leans against a shelf.)

C: I've got a bad feeling about those two. They smelled like death.

AZ: You think? Personally, I found they smelled like love. Quite a lot, in fact.

C: Ngk, whatever. S'not like we're ever gonna see them again. Now, you're coming, Angel? The Ritz is waiting for us.

AZ: Oh, most certainly, my dear!

Tragic bbc boys

[blazingsaddle]

PORTRAYAL NOTE

My Johnny is a weird mix: not only did he perform in the circus, he also performed in rodeos and knows how to ride horses as well as motorcycles. Though grim, he tries to maintain an optimistic outlook on life - even with being under Mephisto's thumb.

SHIPPING STATUS

Johnny is bisexual & multi-ship!

WRITER

Vik, they/he, 21+, EST. Your neighborhood chronically ill & disabled writer.

GOLDEN RULE

Be courteous! Do not reblog things except threads you are involved in or things I have made for you from me. All other things are to be reblogged from the source. It messes up my notifications. No godmodding, metagaming, knowing of Johnny being Ghost Rider unless permission is given by me - we can figure out plot points or et cetera for this, but it must be done with MY CONSENT. Failure to do this, and automatically assume that it is okay, will constitute a hardblock.

EXPLICIT CONTENT

All content of this nature will be tagged with "nsft cw" (less explicit content will be tagged as "suggestive cw") as Clark enjoys and engages in this content when the opportunity arises. He and I are both over 21, and because of this, I will only write with those who are of age and over: 18+.

TRIGGERING THEMES

Demonic, supernatural, & religious imagery will be present. As will heavy violence and mentions of the Devil.

THE REPLY CLAUSE

I’m taking a long time to reply — ic or in ims/on discord — because I have health issues, including (but not limited to; these are all diagnosed) chronic fatigue, PCOS, endometriosis, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, OCD, C-PTSD, depression, anxiety, and I have a bad leg. I am a proud cripple + take my time to write, especially on low energy days. This does not mean that my interest in our stuff has waned! I am simply too low energy to interact with anyone. I also have a busy life full of chores (I help my dad out as a caregiver and also do household duties and feed chickens and garden) and work, on top of my health conditions. I also want the writing I post to be of high quality.

I do apologize for your wait. Especially since my health has declined.

WRITING LENGTH & FORMAT & STYLE

I am a novella roleplayer. The longer, the better. I do make attempts to match length, and can write shorter if you do not like longer things. The tense I prefer to write in is present; I have a special-looking first line, and italicize for emphasis.

I am not a stickler for grammar (I took linguistics and know that "proper" grammar is really a myth), but please use proper punctuation if able. It really triggers my OCD, and I cannot go back and edit your reply to have proper punctuation on my blog. An occasional error or so is fine; I simply ask that it is not the norm. I am also okay to help assist with these in case someone wishes to write with me but struggles with punctuation. I also attempt to not fix typos if I see them, as a way to work on myself.

MEMES

I encourage you to continue any asks or memes I send/answer. Though memes are not the priority for interaction for me, I encourage you to send them, and I will respond to them when I can. I vastly prefer plotting.

STARTING OR ENDING THE WRITING RELATIONSHIP

If you are keen on having a writing relationship with me, I would prefer you and I have each other's Discord information. Please hardblock me if you wish to stop writing with me. Do not softblock, as I will assume it is a tumblr error and ask if everything is okay. Hardblocking ensures that there are no questions asked, no inquiring: I do want you to keep your space safe.

I will only softblock you if I do not wish to write with you, before contacting you or forming a writing relationship. I will also unfollow if you do not follow me back within a set amount of time, as I am mutuals only.

BLOG IDENTIFIERS

Private, mutuals only, highly selective, oc + multi muse + au friendly, & independent.

PERSONALS

Please do not follow or interact with this blog unless you have an rp sideblog.

Reading my threads is fine, you are welcome to consume this content! But do not follow or like or reblog my posts. You are welcome to ask my thoughts about headcanons, or send me inquisitive asks. I will not roleplay with you, however.

[edaworks]

RJ, circa August 2283 (age 18). He’s so smol and scruffy and angry

(EDIT: I cannot even begin to describe how badly tumblr broke my formatting when I posted this. Fixed now)

Caravan time! Dude’s been on the road for a while to have goggle tan lines like that. He needs a meal and a drink and sleep, and for his friend to drag him off to explain a few things to keep RJ from (justifiably) deciding to start a barfight.

There are a number of flashbacks in One if by Land, many of which address occurrences between FO3 and FO4. This is pre-Duncan (not by much!) though he’s already married to Lucy, who is with him on this sojourn. They haven’t settled into their homestead yet, and won’t for about ten months (June of ‘84).

They’re at the homestead for about a year and a half before Lucy dies (December of ‘85). Then it’s about ten months before Duncan gets ill (late October of ‘86), which results in RJ reaching the Commonwealth in early ‘87 (late January). He’s on his own for three months, runs with the Gunners for five, leaves them in September, and takes up with Nora in December of ‘87.

[pupika-samika]

A King Is Nothing Without His People

Chapter 1

The End Of The Beginning

CW: character death, detailed gore, mental illness mentioned (disassociation, suicidal thoughts)

Edit: I just realized that I forgot about formatting so I'll fix that when I get to my computer (fixed it)

Archive Next->

This was it. This was the moment he'd been waiting for. The Master Sword gleamed proudly in his hand, the blade as fine as the day he found it. Edges so sharp they could cut him with the lightest touch. His shield felt heavy on his arm, the leather straps so tightly wound up he could feel the blood pumping under his skin. The bow around his back wasn't any lighter, the leather strap it sat on almost choking him- the weight of such a powerful weapon almost suffocated him. He spent a year fighting for his life for this moment. But here he was. The past year had been hell. The last year was spent killing monsters, breaking weapons, gaining allies, risking his life. Dying. Bleeding. Crying. Surviving. All of his suffering was for this moment.

Ganon was oddly beautiful. In a monstrous sort of way. The cocoon reminded him of the Shrine of Resurrection, fixing something broken for a hundred years. Red and purple swirled together in a mesmeric rhythm, twirling and entwining together harmlessly. The room grew dark and Ganon finally broke free. And by the goddess no longer was he oddly beautiful. His body was like a spider. Eight ugly limbs helping it move its giant body, four holding weapons he'd seen training guardians use in shrines. He could've chosen a better-looking body. No one likes an eight-legged, hundred-year-old monster. The weight of Ganon's body hitting the floor made the floor crack. Crack. Break. Suddenly there was no more floor. Ganon hit the ground with a rough splat, the malice swirling and bubbling as it absorbed the impact of the fall. How was he supposed to defeat something that could absorb damage? 

Link was quick to throw out his paraglider, safely landing on the ground in front of Ganon. Just as he landed, Link felt something. It felt like before he started his adventure, when he was alone. He couldn't feel the Champions anymore. They weren't in his soul anymore. Where were they? How could they leave him? Why did they leave? Did they leave him by himself to deal with Ganon? Before his panic grew any larger he heard something. A faint but quickly growing sound. It sounded like… like a guardian laser. Were there guardians nearby? ...No. Not a guardian laser. Guardian lasers weren't that big or loud. The blue beam of light was aimed at Ganon, who screamed as he was bathed in the blue hues. As the laser dwindled into nothing he could feel the Champions again. Each one was buzzing. Their souls were cheering for him. He couldn't fail. Not when they were counting on him.

As he fought Ganon, he fell into the rhythm of it. If he wasn't fighting for his life he might've found it relaxing. 'Dodge, dodge. Shoot. Spin. Shield. Parry, parry- block! Shoot, shoot, shield.' Links' thoughts took a monotone turn, narrating his every move. Ganon was ugly, so very ugly. His arms ached with overexertion. His face and neck were drenched in sweat. Or blood. He couldn't tell the difference anymore. There was so much blood and sweat covering him, even small amounts of malice managed to cling to his clothes. His arms were slippery, the Master Sword slipping with each swing. The cherry blood on its handle wasn't helping keep his grip. He spent a hundred years powering up, there's no way he can easily win this fight. "Daruk's Protection is ready to roll!" At least Daruk could protect him until he figured this out. He's just in time too, his shield just broke. "Mipha's Grace is ready," followed not long after. He was tired. He was so very tired. His body begged to rest, to sit, eat- sleep, anything! But he couldn't. Not yet. The divine beasts had done their part, now he must do his. 

---

It had been hours. Or maybe days. He couldn't tell, he's been fighting for so long. They ended up outside at some point, and Ganon changed his form. He faintly heard Zelda talking to him at one point but he couldn't hear what was said. He was too tired to hear what was said. He'd used up all the champions' abilities and had them recharged, only to use them again. The only ability he hadn't exhausted was Revali's gale, but even then he only had one gale left in him. He was so tired, he hadn't eaten or slept at all during this fight. But that's ok because this is the moment. Zelda has given him the Bow of Light and Revali created one last updraft. It was time to end this once and for all. Ganon wouldn't terrorize Hyrule anymore.

----

Zelda did it...! She did it! She sealed Ganon away, away for good! Link almost collapsed in relief. But he couldn't. Not yet. Zelda needed to be seen first. It's been a hundred years, she's much more tired than he is. After she had given him the Bow of Light, Link rode around on Rita's back and shot arrows at the spots where Zelda was able to hold back the malice. When Ganon was weak enough he showed his weak spot, and eye in the center of his head. Zelda was able to hold much of the malice from covering the eye and Revali created an updraft for Link to ride on to shoot at the eye. Link didn't see much of what happened next, there was a bright golden light and a hot rush of air. When he could see again, he saw Ganon disappearing into a puff of malice and Zelda standing in his place, gown swaying in the wind. As Link moved towards Zelda he noticed something...odd. Zelda was swaying like a leaf fighting against the wind. But there was no wind, it had calmed down in the last few seconds. What's wrong with Zelda? 

Link moved closer, his steps carefully loud. He didn't want to startle her. "Princess...?" A voice he barely recognized asked. An unspoken question, 'are you ok?' following it. Zelda slowly turned around, her face pale as a cloud. Her hair was a painful white color, not yellow enough to be blonde anymore but not pale enough to be called white. Her skin looked as fragile as a near broken sword, arms too thin to support her if she fell. Her eyes... Her eyes scared him. They held too much in them. While the rest of her was fragile, ready to break, her eyes were strong. Resilient. They knew something he didn't. They knew something he didn't want to know. They held happiness, promise, amusement. They held the look of a proud warrior. They held anger, resentment, annoyance. They held the look of a fighter too well aware of death. They held sadness, fear, and hatred. They held everything wrong with the world, but they held everything right. 

What's that on her chest? That swirling, that looks like-! Zelda... No. Zelda can't- Hylia, Hylia wouldn't let her! "Zelda? Do you need to sit down?" His throat was starting to hurt. No, it already hurt, it was just hurting more. Was he screaming during his fight with Ganon? 

"Link, it's so good to finally hear your voice. I didn't...I didn't think I'd ever hear it before I died. It's such a lovely voice, you should use it more." She said and raised a hand to him, grabbing it with her other she realized what she was doing. Link wanted to hold her but he knew all too well what would happen if he touched her. "I'm sorry Link. I... He got to me before I got to him. But don't worry. I-I figured something like this would happen. Go to Impa. She'll tell you what to do next. For now, this is goodbye Link...thank you for freeing us. Thank you for freeing Hyrule. I'm sorry I couldn't be the Queen our people needed." 

No...This was wrong. Wrong. Wrong! She wasn't supposed to die! She wasn't! She helped him! She was supposed to live! If he had been faster- if he hadn't fooled around so much or regained his memories sooner! The malice... He could see it now. The malice, it was too much. He didn't notice it before, her too big gown covered most of it. But the malice was too much, too lethal. She wouldn't make it, not even her powers could save her now. The malice was traveling over her body, her neck quickly covered and her arms following shortly after. He couldn't see her legs but he could guess the moment she fell to the ground is the moment they were covered too. 

"I don't have much time left. Link, can you honor one last request? One last request from me?" She asked, her voice heavily laced with pain and- and malice. Link nodded, moving closer to Zelda. She was almost unrecognizable. Her blonde hair was now tinged red, the unmistakable red of blood. Her skin wasn't skin anymore, instead grotesque pools of bubbling hatred. Her eyes... Her eyes were fighting. Emotions flickering too fast to see. He stopped just a few short paces in front of Zelda, kneeling in front of her. The Master Sword was held tightly in his hand, dried blood spilled all over its handle. Was that his blood? He couldn't remember.

Zelda looked at him, a smile on her lips and tears down her cheeks. He knew what she wanted him to do. Closing his eyes didn't stop the tears from falling, covering his vision of the princess sitting in front of him. "Kill me before I turn into him. Please. Kill me before I turn into a monster of hatred," she begged, though it was unneeded. He'd honor her last request, no matter how much it hurt him to do so. 

With the Master Swords hilt digging into his palms he took one last look at the princess, who was looking at him with sorrow. The blade gleaming in the sinking sun. Link steeled himself as he positioned both hands on the hilt. "Goodbye, Princess Zelda. It was an honor serving you. I wish you nothing but happiness in your next life." Link said, his voice barely audible in the slowly moving wind. Forcing his eyes on his target, he swung his blade; the sound of flesh tearing all too familiar to him. The blood gushed out in waves, but it wasn't enough for a quick death. It was too shallow. The cut was too shallow. She'd choke on her blood as it filled her lungs, giving her a painful death. He had to kill her another way. 

The heart. He had to stab the heart. He didn't think he could do it. The princess wasn't- he couldn't. It was all too much. He can't process everything. Without thinking he stabbed at her heart. Once, twice. Three times. She was dead. Dead by stabbing.

Princess Zelda was dead. 

Who would rule Hyrule now? Who would become Queen? What was he supposed to do? 

Impa. Impa would know what to do. Impa always knows what to do. Zelda said he had to go to Impa. 

He just needed a minute. He just needed to sit down. He was so tired. He couldn't fight anymore. What was there to fight for? His reason to fight was dead, malice and blood covering her body. Glancing at the Master Sword he couldn't help but wonder, what would it feel like? Mipha's Grace wasn't ready, he'd already used it today. This time if he died, it'd be permanent. There'd be no coming back. But he couldn't use the Master Sword. The spirit inside wouldn't let him dirty her blade with his blood. 

Exhaustion finally pulled at him enough to make him fall over, facing up to the night sky. When did that happen? The sun was just out when he… when he killed the princess. He could worry about that later, he was so tired. 

With the night sky above him, stars twinkling with amusement, he fell into a deep sleep. If only he wasn't so tired he could have turned his head, even if it was just a few inches. If he wasn't so tired and turned his head he'd see the four teal spirits standing next to him, each holding a different expression.

Taking editor(s)/beta reader(s) for this fic

[pleasedontanalyzeme]

Remember 2019

Gabriella Torres

Manaus, Brazil

20-Nov-18

shot

Perlita de Guerrero

Acapulco, Guerrero, Mexico

22-Nov-18

shot

Nahomy Alexandra López Orellana “La Pepita”

Sacacoyo, El Salvador

25-Nov-18

strangled

Fábia Ju Dias

Manhuaçu, Brazil

26-Nov-18

beaten

Mikaela Africana Sanhes

Salvador, Brazil

26-Nov-18

shot

Tydi Dansbury

Baltimore, MD, USA

MD

28-Nov-18

shot

Rajni

Gurugram, India

28-Nov-18

shot

Duda

Marabá, Brazil

1-Dec-18

shot

Karliane Vitoria Rodrigues

Taguatinga Sul, Brazil

4-Dec-18

shot

Luisa Fernanda Hernandez

Leon, Guanajuato, Mexico

4-Dec-18

shot

Nancy de Monza

Milan, Italy

5-Dec-18

beaten

J.C. Pereira de Lima

Itanhaém, Brazil

5-Dec-18

Beaten

Keanna Mattel, aka Kelly Stough

Detroit, Michigan, USA

MI

7-Dec-18

shot

Name Unknown

Villa Nueva, Guatemala

7-Dec-18

not reported

Jéssica Dimy

Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

7-Dec-18

burned

Victória Landeiro

Rondonopolis, Brazil

9-Dec-18

shot

Scarlety Mastroianyy

Londrina, Brazil

10-Dec-18

stabbed

Manuel Luna

Morelia, Michoacan, Mexico

11-Dec-18

not reported

Name Unknown

São Vicente, Brazil

11-Dec-18

asphyxiation

Name Unknown

Parnamirim, Brazil

12-Dec-18

beaten

Name Unknown

Klang, Malaysia

12-Dec-18

beaten

Gabi Blak

Brasilandia, Brazil

12-Dec-18

strangled

Scarlett Cedeño

Cali, Colombia

14-Dec-18

not reported

Marilin

Buenos Aires, Argentina

16-Dec-18

run-over by car

Valquiria

Imperatriz, Brazil

17-Dec-18

stabbed

Litzy Hurtado

El Alto, Bolivia

17-Dec-18

stabbed

Name Unknown

Guerrero, Abasolo, Mexico

19-Dec-18

shot

Márcia Rodrigues Pereira

Camapuã, Brazil

20-Dec-18

strangled

Gaby

Playa Del Carmen, Quintana Roo, Mexico

23-Dec-18

stoned

Jéssica Bracamonte

Veron, Punta Cana, Dominican Republic

25-Dec-18

stabbed

Denisse Hernández Rivero

Tixtla, Guerrero, Mexico

26-Dec-18

stabbed

Nicolly Banks

Uberlândia, Brazil

28-Dec-18

shot

Valentina Herrera Guzman

Cali, Colombia

28-Dec-18

not reported

Melissa Brunely

Linhares, Brazil

28-Dec-18

run-over by car

Rogéria Paiva

Maracanau, Brazil

29-Dec-18

shot

Sabrina Santos Vidal

Taperoá, Brazil

31-Dec-18

stabbed

Devora Montolio

Maimón, Dominican Republic

1-Jan-19

stabbed

Mikinho Lima dos Santos

Lajeado, Brazil

1-Jan-19

shot

Name Unknown

Klang, Malaysia

1-Jan-19

other

Name Unknown

Gravataí, Brazil

1-Jan-19

other

Laura Muñoz Arcila

Cali, Colombia

1-Jan-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

Quintana Roo, Mexico

4-Jan-19

Shot

Dana Martin

Montgomery, Alabama, USA

AL

6-Jan-19

shot to the head

Carla Girón Lodoño

Tulua, Colombia

6-Jan-19

shot

Hande Seker

Anatolia, Turkey

9-Jan-19

shot

Amy Griffiths

Worcestershire, England, United Kingdom

14-Jan-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Tamaulipas, Reynosa, Mexico

14-Jan-19

asphyxiation

Alka

Tatapani, India

16-Jan-19

tortured

Sussy Montalván

Copiapó, Chile

17-Jan-19

strangled

Sheilla Prado

Tubarão, Brazil

20-Jan-19

other

Quelly da Silva “Jeninha”

Campinas, Brazil

21-Jan-19

stabbed

Yara Serena Camargo

Recife, Brazil

22-Jan-19

stabbed

Nashley Delgado Segovia

Aldama, Mexico

23-Jan-19

shot

Jésica Benevidez “Nicky”

Parana, Argentina

24-Jan-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

24-Jan-19

not reported

J. da Silva dos Santos

Camaçari, Brazil

25-Jan-19

shot

Aysla Souza

Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

25-Jan-19

beaten

Pamela Sandoval Ramírez

Chimalhuacán, Mexico

27-Jan-19

not reported

Mirna Antonella Di Marzo

Salta, Argentina

28-Jan-19

beaten

Jehangir

Jatta Ismail Khel, Pakistan

29-Jan-19

shot

Ana Paula da Costa Ribeiro

Tramandaí, Brazil

30-Jan-19

stabbed

Ellie Marie Washtock

World Golf Village, Florida, USA

FL

31-Jan-19

shot

Name Unknown

Kohat, Pakistan

1-Feb-19

other

La Joha González Leal

Maracaibo, Venezuela

2-Feb-19

beaten

Camila Diaz Córdova “Aurora”

San Salvador, El Salvador

3-Feb-19

beaten

Laly Heredia Escobar “Sonia Laly”

La Matanza, Argentina

3-Feb-19

shot

Mellyssa Rodrigues dos Santos

Piracicaba, Brazil

4-Feb-19

beaten

Miriam Rivera

Hermosillo. Sonora, Mexico

5-Feb-19

strangled

Daniele Azevedo

Manaus, Brazil

8-Feb-19

not reported

Fabi Cortes Morales

Las Chopas, Veracruz, Mexico

8-Feb-19

shot

Lolita

Sonsonate, El Salvador

8-Feb-19

stabbed

Miúda

Niterói, Brazil

11-Feb-19

shot

Kayla Alves

Nova Ipixuna, Brazil

11-Feb-19

stabbed

Meg Duran

São Paulo, Brazil

15-Feb-19

shot

Samira Morena

Sorocaba, Brazil

16-Feb-19

stabbed

Rajathi

Thoothukudi, India

18-Feb-19

dismembered

Nathyelly Cruz

Uruaçu, Brazil

21-Feb-19

stabbed

V. Barbosa de Aquino

Palmas, Brazil

21-Feb-19

stabbed

Minerva Rubio

Chihuahua, Chihuahua, Mexico

21-Feb-19

shot

Verito

Quito, Ecuador

22-Feb-19

stabbed

Mirlla Vasques Arcanjo

Manaus, Brazil

23-Feb-19

stoned

Name Unknown

Castellón de la Plana, Spain

24-Feb-19

asphyxiation

Aghata

Manaus, Brazil

25-Feb-19

other

Ana de Lima

Pacatuba, Brazil

26-Feb-19

shot

Name Unknown

Guaiúba, Brazil

26-Feb-19

shot

Sayonara

Carapicuiba, Brazil

27-Feb-19

dismembered

Pamela Arenceli

La Matanza, Buenos Aires, Argentina

28-Feb-19

shot

Maxim Brizuela

La Matanza, Buenos Aires, Argentina

28-Feb-19

shot

Laura Gentle Argueta

Rotan, Isla De La Bahia, Honduras

2-Mar-19

stabbed

Brigitte Galván

Yucatán, Mexico

3-Mar-19

other

Maylla dos Santos

Coari, Brazil

4-Mar-19

strangled

Pamela

Santa Luzia do Pará, Brazil

5-Mar-19

shot

Maria Paula Murillo Reyes

Costa Rica, Costa Rica

5-Mar-19

not reported

La Mariposa

Ciudad del Carmen, Mexico

6-Mar-19

strangled

Flavia Santana

Anapolis, Brazil

8-Mar-19

strangled

Perla

São Paulo, Brazil

8-Mar-19

shot

Renata Spencer

Tepeji Del Rio, Hidalgo, Mexico

9-Mar-19

stoned

Name Unknown

Jiutepec, Morelos, Mexico

10-Mar-19

Stabbed

Nazab Abid Shaikh Date of death:

Maharashtra, India

11-Mar-19

throat cut

Junu

Kathmandu, Nepal

11-Mar-19

beaten

Pollita Ruiz

Jiutepec, Oaxaca, Mexico

13-Mar-19

shot

Name Unknown

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

13-Mar-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

13-Mar-19

not reported

Zaira Betancur

Bogotá, Colombia

14-Mar-19

throat cut

Caio Dantas Monteiro

Angra dos Reis, Brazil

16-Mar-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

Alcaldia Gustavo A. Madero, Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico

16-Mar-19

stabbed

Mara da Silva

Mossoro, Brazil

17-Mar-19

shot

Alessandra Date of death:

Buritis, Brazil

17-Mar-19

shot

Name Unknown

Merida, Yucatan, Mexico

17-Mar-19

stabbed

B.J.P.

Cancun, Quintana Roo, Mexico

20-Mar-19

asphyxiation

Lara

Belém, Brazil

23-Mar-19

beaten

Name Unknown

Manaus, Brazil

23-Mar-19

stoned

Fabricia de Moura Lima

Goiânia, Brazil

24-Mar-19

shot

W. Adalí Hernández Rápalo

Villanueva, Honduras

24-Mar-19

not reported

Jazzaline Ware

Memphis, Alabama, USA

AL

25-Mar-19

not reported

Celaya Méndey Yelada

Aguadulce, Veracruz, Mexico

25-Mar-19

not reported

Amma Hajjani

Sindh, Pakistan

26-Mar-19

beaten

Marisol Montenegro

Puerto Montt, Chile

27-Mar-19

strangled

Ashanti Carmon

Fairmount Heights, Maryland, USA

MD

30-Mar-19

shot

Paty Santos

Manaus, Brazil

30-Mar-19

strangled

Patricia Rafaela dos Santos Camargo

Maringá, Brazil

30-Mar-19

run-over by car

Claudia Vera

Independencia, Lima, Peru

30-Mar-19

shot

Crysllaine Guedes da Silva

Juazeiro do Norte, Brazil

1-Apr-19

stabbed

Eduarda Albuquerque

Angra dos Reis, Brazil

3-Apr-19

beaten

Barbara

Itabuna, Brazil

5-Apr-19

shot

Name Unknown

Jacareí, Brazil

5-Apr-19

stabbed

Shalu

Kozhikode, India

5-Apr-19

strangled

Sandrielly Vasconcelos

Boa Vista, Brazil

6-Apr-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

Franca, Brazil

7-Apr-19

stabbed

Kasandra Solórzano Romero

Huila, Colombia

8-Apr-19

asphyxiation

Brenda Plaza Vallejos

Valaparaiso, Chile

8-Apr-19

stabbed

Marqueza

Campo Grande, Brazil

9-Apr-19

shot

Malaj Islas

Puerto De Veracruz, Veracruz, Mexico

10-Apr-19

stabbed

Juju

Sapezal, Brazil

12-Apr-19

stabbed

Ainee Khan

Sindh, Pakistan

13-Apr-19

stabbed

Sabrina

João Pessoa, Brazil

13-Apr-19

shot

Claire Legato

Cleveland, Ohio, USA

OH

15-Apr-19

shot

Kenia Hilton

Ciudad de Mexico, Mexico

15-Apr-19

other

Nina Surgutskaya

Kursk, Russia

15-Apr-19

strangled

Tamara

Ciudad de Mexico, Mexico

17-Apr-19

not reported

Becky

Minatitlan, Veracruz, Mexico

19-Apr-19

shot

E. dos Santos da Rosa

Paraná, Brazil

19-Apr-19

stabbed

Jessica Gómez Rúa (Pajarita)

Bucaramanga, Colombia

21-Apr-19

stabbed

Natalia Delgado Rubio

Irapuato, Guanajuato, Mexico

21-Apr-19

dismembered

Haji Noori

Jhansi, India

21-Apr-19

beaten

Name Unknown

Fortaleza, Brazil

22-Apr-19

not reported

Rica Reyes

Cebu, Philippines

23-Apr-19

beaten

Rayssa dos Santos

Caucaia, Brazil

23-Apr-19

shot

Catalina Casquete Holguín, Cata

Ciudad Cuenca, Provincia Guayas, Ecuador

25-Apr-19

run-over by car

Name Unknown

Salamanaca, Guanajuato, Mexico

27-Apr-19

shot

Yaritza Angélica Millones López

Buenos Aires, Argentina

28-Apr-19

asphyxiation

Jasmynne Fontile de Brito

Guarapes, Brazil

30-Apr-19

shot

El Choco

Chihuahua, Chihuahua, Mexico

2-May-19

shot

Name Unknown

Grajau, Brazil

2-May-19

stabbed

Melissa

Bacabal, Brazil

4-May-19

tortured

Larissa Rodrigues da Silva

São Paulo, Brazil

4-May-19

beaten

Heart Pontanes

Malabon, Philippines

6-May-19

stabbed

M. Dantas da Silva

Guariba, Brazil

6-May-19

stabbed

Yara Souza

São Paulo, Brazil

10-May-19

strangled

Luana Date of death:

Maranhao, Brazil

11-May-19

shot

Name Unknown

Uberlandia, Minas Gerais, Brazil

11-May-19

asphyxiation

Talia Silveira Pacheco Santos

Belo Horizonte, Brazil

12-May-19

stabbed

Gökçe Naz Saygi

Antalya, Turkey

13-May-19

stabbed

Natalia

Mexico City, Mexico

13-May-19

beaten

Dulce

Alcaldia Benito Juarez, Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico

14-May-19

not reported

Bibiu

Fortaleza, Brazil

15-May-19

shot

A. A. Silva Costa Date of death:

Mineiros, Brazil

16-May-19

shot

Alana Ferreira

São Paulo, Brazil

16-May-19

beaten

Muhlaysia Booker

Dallas, Texas, USA

TX

18-May-19

shot

Angela Paola Fajardo

Mixco, Guatemala

18-May-19

stabbed

Michelle ‘Tamika’ Washington

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA

PA

19-May-19

shot

Thaylla Rodrigues de Moura

Campo Grande, Brazil

19-May-19

stabbed

Jesusa

Fortin De Las Flores, Veracruz, Mexico

20-May-19

dismembered

Reva Desai

Mumbai, India

21-May-19

stabbed

Paris Cameron

Detroit, Michigan, USA

MI

25-May-19

shot

Britany

Misantla, Veracruz, Mexico

26-May-19

shot

Name Unknown

Old Hyderabda City, India

26-May-19

beaten

Gala Estefanía Perea

San Isidro de Lules, Tucumán, Argentina

26-May-19

strangled

Elaynne Marques

Lucas do Rio Verde, Brazil

27-May-19

shot

R. Adelso Rodriguez Alonzo

Usumatlán, Zacapa , Guatemala

28-May-19

shot

Jahy Bianchini

Cachoeiro de Itapemirim, Espírito Santo , Brazil

30-May-19

shot

leleco

Lucena, Brazil

30-May-19

beaten

Rosinha do Beco

Morro do Chapéu, Brazil

30-May-19

beaten

Rose

Jaboatão dos Guararapes, Brazil

31-May-19

shot

Johana Medina León (“Joa”)

El Paso, Texas, USA

TX

1-Jun-19

other

Chynal Lindsey

Dallas, Texas, USA

TX

1-Jun-19

asphyxiation

Fabiola

Quimistan, Santa Barbara, Honduras

2-Jun-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Barranquilla, Colombia

3-Jun-19

stabbed

Miranda Pilar Ruiz

El Empalme, Ecuador

3-Jun-19

shot

Mayte Castro Anay

El Empalme, Ecuador

3-Jun-19

shot

Cecelia Cranko

South Orange, New Jersey, USA

NJ

5-Jun-19

burned

Chanel Scurlock

Lumberton, California, USA

CA

6-Jun-19

shot

Layleen Cubilette Polanco Xtravaganza

Rikers Island, New York , USA

NY

7-Jun-19

other

Shakira (La Moy)

Choloma, Cortés, Honduras

8-Jun-19

stoned

Pamela

Maringá, Brazil

10-Jun-19

shot

Alex Milkovich

Nytva, Russia

10-Jun-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Queretaro, Mexico

11-Jun-19

beaten

Zoe Spears

Fairmonut Heights, Maryland, USA

MA

13-Jun-19

shot

Name Unknown

Municipio Coatzintla, Veracruz, Mexico

14-Jun-19

beaten

Nahara

Fortaleza, Brazil

16-Jun-19

shot

Maycon Clebes dos Reis

Coromandel, Brazil

16-Jun-19

stabbed

Dafne Yilmaz

Afyonkarahisar, Turkey

16-Jun-19

stabbed

Pollyane Weneck

Coromandel, Brazil

16-Jun-19

stabbed

Lohane (Jasmine)

Palmares, Brazil

17-Jun-19

stabbed

Monica Devain

Jiutepec, Morelos, Mexico

18-Jun-19

stabbed

Doris Hernandez

Guadalajara, Jalisco, Mexico

21-Jun-19

not reported

Brooklyn Lindsey

Kansas City, MO, USA

MO

25-Jun-19

shot

J.P. Moreno

Coatzacoalcos, Veracruz, Mexico

25-Jun-19

shot

Name Unknown

Multan, Pakistan

28-Jun-19

tortured

Name Unknown

Multan, Pakistan

28-Jun-19

tortured

Maya

Khyber Pukhtunkhwa, Pakistan

1-Jul-19

shot

Jessica

Araguaina, Brazil

2-Jul-19

shot

Antonia Laínez Larios

El Negrito, Yoro, Honduras, Honduras

3-Jul-19

shot

Santi

Puerto Cortés, Honduras, Honduras

6-Jul-19

shot

Shakira Fernandez de la Hoz

Medellin, Antioquia, Colombia

7-Jul-19

stabbed

Bessy Michelle Ferrera

Comayaguela, Honduras

8-Jul-19

shot

Carly

Oaxaca, Oaxaca, Mexico

10-Jul-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

San Luis, San Luis Potosi, Mexico

10-Jul-19

shot

Name Unknown

San Luis, San Luis Potosi, Mexico

10-Jul-19

shot

Name Unknown

Alcaldia Xochimilo, Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico

12-Jul-19

not reported

Lucia Barrera Date of death:

Parana, Entre Rios, Argentina

14-Jul-19

stabbed

Angie Digiacomo

Buenos Aires, Argentina

17-Jul-19

other

S. Medina

Salta, Argentina

18-Jul-19

asphyxiation

Denali Berries Stuckey

North Charleston, North Carolina, USA

NC

20-Jul-19

shot

Tracy Single

Houston, Texas, USA

TX

20-Jul-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

Nagrakata, India

24-Jul-19

beaten

Sandy

Chilpancingo, Guerrero, Mexico

24-Jul-19

shot

Bubba Walker

Charlotte, United States of America

27-Jul-19

burned

Muskan

Multan, Pakistan

27-Jul-19

tortured

Nadia

Multan, Pakistan

27-Jul-19

tortured

Marquis “Kiki” Fantroy

Miami, Florida, USA

FL

31-Jul-19

shot

Jordan Cofer

Dayton, Ohio, USA

OH

4-Aug-19

shot

Pebbles LaDime “Dime” Doe

Allendale County, South Carolina, USA

SC

4-Aug-19

shot

Rosalinda Pérez Berigüete

San Juan Maguana, Dominican Republic

4-Aug-19

stabbed

Gabriele Oliveira

Belo Jardim, Brazil

5-Aug-19

shot

Karla Fernanda Silva

La Maná, Cotopaxi, Ecuador

5-Aug-19

other

Name Unknown

Tecoman, Colima, Mexico

6-Aug-19

shot

J. A. Cermeño Medina

Caracas, Venezuela

7-Aug-19

shot

Angi García “La Gata”

Santo Domingo de los Tsachilas, Ecuador

7-Aug-19

strangled

Alondra García

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

8-Aug-19

stabbed

Aylin Hernández Gómez

San Cristóbal de las Casas, Mexico

11-Aug-19

strangled

W. Félix de Oliveira

Maracanaú, Brazil

11-Aug-19

stoned

Sara Miranda de Souza

Frutal, Brazil

12-Aug-19

stabbed

Abril Navarro Salazar

Alvaro Obregon, Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico

15-Aug-19

stabbed

Nathacha Ruby Flores

Quito, Ecuador

19-Aug-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

19-Aug-19

not reported

Aline da Silva

Arcoverde, Brazil

20-Aug-19

stabbed

Kate Maikelly de Jesus Barbosa

Teixeira de Freitas, Brazil

21-Aug-19

not reported

Ashley

Huajuapan De Leon, Oaxaca, Mexico

22-Aug-19

not reported

Daniela Martinez

Cicuco, Colombia

22-Aug-19

beaten

Name Unknown

Iztapalapa, Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico

24-Aug-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Acapulco, Guerrero, Mexico

24-Aug-19

shot

Hani

Mansehra, Pakistan

26-Aug-19

shot

Roberta “Xirrara” Rodrigues

Inhumas, Brazil

30-Aug-19

shot

Sana Khan

Khyber Pakhtunkhwa, Pakistan

30-Aug-19

stabbed

Brigitte Escalona Escobar

Caracas, Venezuela

31-Aug-19

asphyxiation

Name Unknown

Santiago, Chile

31-Aug-19

stabbed

Bailey Reeves

Baltimore, Marylnd, USA

MD

2-Sep-19

shot

Name Unknown

Ziguatanejo, Guerrero, Mexico

3-Sep-19

shot

Andra Mora López

Tequendama, Colombia

3-Sep-19

run-over by car

Bee Love Slater

Clewiston, Florida, USA

FL

4-Sep-19

burned

Victoria Santos Falcão

juina, Brazil

5-Sep-19

shot

Yuri Gabriel Castro Farias

Fortaleza, Brazil

6-Sep-19

shot

Name Unknown

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

7-Sep-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico

7-Sep-19

not reported

Ana Paula

Jiutepec, Morelos, Mexico

7-Sep-19

beaten

Carolinne Dias

Santa Maria, Brazil

7-Sep-19

shot

Nemer da Silva Rodrigues

Santa Maria, Brazil

7-Sep-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

Belo Horizonte, Brazil

10-Sep-19

not reported

Name Unknown

Cartagena, Colombia

10-Sep-19

not reported The victim’s body was found in a state of decomposition near a drainage channel.

Ja’leyah Jamar

Kansas City, Kansas, USA

KS

13-Sep-19

shot

Shokir Shavkatov

Tashkent, Uzbekistan

13-Sep-19

dismembered

Luana Piovani

Senador Elói de Souza, Brazil

15-Sep-19

stoned

Bruna Torres

São Carlos, Brazil

15-Sep-19

other

Elisha Chanel Stanley

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, USA

PA

16-Sep-19

not reported

Reena

Baiyapur, India

16-Sep-19

not reported

Jessa Remiendo

Bolinao, Philippines

17-Sep-19

stabbed

Name Unknown

Dushanbe, Tajikistan

17-Sep-19

stabbed

Emmanuelle Agostinho da Silva Barros “Manu”

Santo André, Brazil

19-Sep-19

stabbed

Leandro Parra Hermosilla

Coyhaqye, Aysen, Chile

19-Sep-19

stabbed

Itali Marlowe

Houston, Texas, USA

TX

20-Sep-19

shot

Médely Razard

Itaquaquecetuba, Brazil

20-Sep-19

strangled

Bruna Surfistinha de Freitas

Chorozinho, Brazil

20-Sep-19

shot

Paloma Barreto

Avilés, Spain

21-Sep-19

stabbed

Mhelody Polan Bruno

Wagga Wagga, New South Wales , Australia

21-Sep-19

not reported

Itzayana López Hernández

Alcaldia Alvaro Obregon, Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico

22-Sep-19

asphyxiation

Yoselin Martín Velasco

Ciudad Modelo, Valle Del Cauca, Colombia

28-Sep-19

shot

Name Unknown

Registro, Brazil

28-Sep-19

stabbed

Chhaya

Durg, India

29-Sep-19

not reported

Júnia Franco

Uberlândia, Brazil

29-Sep-19

stabbed

Brianna “BB” Hill

Kansas City, Missouri

MO

14-Oct-19

Shot to death

TODAY IS TRANSGENDER DAY OF REMEMBRANCE. Here is a list from tdor.info of the list of this year’s victims:

Carolina/Camila Angulo Paredes Buenos Aires, Argentina 29-Dec-17 shot

Lourdes Reinoso Tucuman, Argentina 14-Jan-18 stabbed

Ynina Puerto Madryn, Argentina 30-Jan-18 Unknown

Adriana Estefanía Bonetto San Jose del Rincon, Argentina 8-Feb-18 stabbed

Cinthia Moreira Villa Alen, Argentina 22-Feb-18 decapitated/dismembered

Sol Gómez Santa Fe, Argentina 7-Mar-18 Unknown

Julia Ponce Buenos Aires, Argentina 23-Jul-18 Unknown

Yanelis Rodríguez Argentina, Argentina 31-Aug-18 Unknown

Bangladesh

Sonia Akter Morrelganj, Bangladesh 31-Dec-17 Unknown

Brazil

L. de Souza Pereira Manaus, Brazil 23-Nov-17 beaten

Unknown Name Uberlândia, Brazil 28-Nov-17 shot

Milena Arapiraca, Brazil 1-Dec-17 stoned

Andressa Xoda Pauladas E Tiros – Salvador, Brazil 3-Dec-17 shot

Eduarda Figueiredo Porto Seguro, Brazil 3-Dec-17 shot

Júlia Volp Florianópolis, Brazil 4-Dec-17 tortured

Jéssica Dimy Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 7-Dec-17 Unknown

Sabrina Uberaba, Brazil 7-Dec-17 Unknown

Luany Aquamarine Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 9-Dec-17 beaten

Luna Shine Viana, Brazil 11-Dec-17 stabbed

Marquete F. C. de Lima Altinho, Brazil 13-Dec-17 shot

Kebeca G. de Souza Gurupi, Brazil 16-Dec-17 shot

Larissa Paiva Sao Paulo, Brazil 17-Dec-17 beaten

Rose João Pessoa, Brazil 17-Dec-17 beaten

Lorrany “Lhoane” Oliveira Santaluz, Brazil 26-Dec-17 tortured

V. O. Silva Uberaba, Brazil 30-Dec-17 tortured

Silvia Gomes Marques Belem, Brazil 1-Jan-18 Unknown

Fany Diniz Belem, Brazil 3-Jan-18 shot

C. Sobral Feira de Santana, Brazil 5-Jan-18 Unknown

Unknown Name Brasília, Brazil 5-Jan-18 stabbed

W. Peixoto Piripiri, Brazil 9-Jan-18 beaten

C. Figueiredo Recife, Brazil 17-Jan-18 stabbed

Carol Alves Tangará da Serra, Brazil 17-Jan-18 shot

Kelly Belém, Brazil 20-Jan-18 shot

Unknown Name Concórdia do Pará, Brazil 20-Jan-18 Unknown

Júlia de Arruda Várzea Grande, Brazil 21-Jan-18 other

Lohane Governador Newton Bello, Brazil 23-Jan-18 stabbed

Rios Dayane Macklarenn São Bernardo do Campo, Brazil 26-Jan-18 Unknown

Raquel Cosinele Recife, Brazil 27-Jan-18 stoned

Samira de Alcantara Nossa Senhora do Socorro, Brazil 29-Jan-18 stabbed

Natália Ketlyn Campos Altos, Brazil 1-Feb-18 shot

Hemilly Dbx Garanhuns, Brazil 6-Feb-18 stabbed

Anninha Ferreira Rochee Colatina, Brazil 7-Feb-18 decapitated/dismembered

A. da S. Silvério Vitíoria de São Antão, Brazil 8-Feb-18 shot

Lohan Vitoria, Brazil 8-Feb-18 beaten

Milonga F. L. Martins Pacajus, Brazil 9-Feb-18 shot

Dominique Uberlândia, Brazil 10-Feb-18 beaten

Nayra Winston Rio Largo, Brazil 10-Feb-18 shot

Unknown Name Fortaleza, Brazil 11-Feb-18 shot

Bruna Belém, Brazil 12-Feb-18 shot

Keila Salvador, Brazil 12-Feb-18 shot

Unknown Name Joao Pessoa, Brazil 12-Feb-18 shot

K. Silva Manaus, Brazil 13-Feb-18 tortured

Pérola Sao Paulo, Brazil 14-Feb-18 shot

Bruna Ferrari Concórdia do Pará, Brazil 15-Feb-18 Unknown

Laysla Oliveira Ribeirão Preto, Brazil 18-Feb-18 beaten

Amanda Rios João Pessoa, Brazil 19-Feb-18 shot

Eduarda Brasil Araras, Brazil 19-Feb-18 other

Rayana Ribeiro João Pessoa, Brazil 20-Feb-18 Unknown

Bia Rocha Recife, Brazil 23-Feb-18 Unknown

Claudia Oliveira Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 23-Feb-18 shot

Fernanda Caetano Lapa, Brazil 23-Feb-18 Unknown

Kimberlys Ochoa Lara, Venezuela 25-Feb-18 beaten

Fernanda “Pit” Dias São Mateus, Brazil 27-Feb-18 shot

Alessandra da Silva Alves Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 1-Mar-18 shot

Shayene Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 1-Mar-18 shot

Palola João Pessoa, Brazil 4-Mar-18 shot

Samielly Castro São Paulo, Brazil 4-Mar-18 shot

Pâmela Tabete Craiba, Brazil 8-Mar-18 beaten

Thalita da Silva Barra do Garças, Brazil 13-Mar-18 throat cut

J. Oliveira da Silva Vila Velha, Brazil 16-Mar-18 shot

Unknown Name Ilha do Governador, Brazil 17-Mar-18 decapitated/dismembered

Bruna Gabriel Ananindeua, Brazil 19-Mar-18 shot

N. Naza Ananindeua, Brazil 19-Mar-18 shot

Paola Oliveira Luziânia, Brazil 20-Mar-18 shot

Alanis Burgo Pelotas, Brazil 22-Mar-18 suffocated

Giorginye Dias de Siqueira Aparecida de Goiânia, Brazil 22-Mar-18 shot

Unknown Name São Leopoldo, Brazil 22-Mar-18 shot

Daniela Santos Ibicaraí, Brazil 23-Mar-18 tortured

Cleide Aládio Zaramarine Neto Itaberaí, Brazil 25-Mar-18 beaten

Hilda de Melo Matias Barbalha, Brazil 25-Mar-18 shot

Eduarda Amaro Pelotas, Brazil 29-Mar-18 shot

Elvira Costa Ferreira Maranguape, Brazil 2-Apr-18 shot

Andressa Muda Macaé, Brazil 3-Apr-18 Unknown

Benjamin de Jesus Sousa Teresina, Brazil 6-Apr-18 stabbed

Angra Alessandra Cupertino Feira de Santana, Brazil 7-Apr-18 stabbed

Millany Spencer Nossa Senhora do Socorro, Brazil 14-Apr-18 Beaten and strangled

Nati da Silva Lajeado, Brazil 20-Apr-18 shot

Nycoly Souza Nardoni Bhals Governador Valadares, Brazil 22-Apr-18 shot

Gabriely Fancciny Porto Velho, Brazil 28-Apr-18 stabbed

Matheusx Passarelli Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 29-Apr-18 burned

Raunna Silva Niterói, Brazil 30-Apr-18 shot

Unknown Name Campo Grande, Brazil 30-Apr-18 shot

Bianca Santos Albuquerque Araras, Brazil 30-Apr-18 shot

Paulinha Fortaleza, Brazil 1-May-18 shot

C. Alves Vitória da Conquista, Brazil 8-May-18 shot

Myrella Mhell Pirapora, Brazil 21-May-18 shot

Pandora Santa Rita, Brazil 21-May-18 shot

Beatriz Ribeiro Bacabal, Brazil 25-May-18 stabbed

D.R.C. Jundiaí, Brazil 25-May-18 beaten

I. Silva Itaberaí, Brazil 29-May-18 Unknown

Patrícia Pereira Maracanaú, Brazil 31-May-18 shot

Nayra Matos Maracanaú, Brazil 31-May-18 shot

Britney Vaz Colniza, Brazil 3-Jun-18 shot

Vitória Salvador, Brazil 3-Jun-18 shot

Unknown Name Manaus, Brazil 6-Jun-18 shot

Kamila Roberta Florianópolis, Brazil 7-Jun-18 beaten

Fernanda Reichert São Leopoldo, Brazil 9-Jun-18 stabbed

Tiffanny Montel Boa Vista, Brazil 10-Jun-18 stabbed

Agatha Gomes (Bebê) Belford Roxo, Brazil 19-Jun-18 shot

Thalia Costa Barboza São Borja, Brazil 21-Jun-18 stoned

Nikolly Silva Cabo Frio, Brazil 22-Jun-18 stoned

Gaby Scheifer Ponta Grossa, Brazil 23-Jun-18 run-over by car

Índia da Silva Pellegrine Salvador, Brazil 25-Jun-18 shot

Bruna da Conceição Lagarto, Brazil 25-Jun-18 shot

Carla Croft Pacajus, Brazil 29-Jun-18 shot

Deepa Jalandhar, India 3-Jul-18 stabbed

Mirela Balneário Camboriú, Brazil 4-Jul-18 strangled/hanged

Shirley dos Santos Recife, Brazil 4-Jul-18 shot

Michele Silveira Itaperuna, Brazil 7-Jul-18 shot

Fernanda da Biz Campo Grande, Brazil 8-Jul-18 stabbed

Aisha Albuquerque Curitiba, Brazil 13-Jul-18 beaten

Daniela Cicarelli Gurupi, Brazil 17-Jul-18 shot

Lay Neves de Santana Camaçari, Brazil 17-Jul-18 shot

Unknown Name Itaperuna, Brazil 20-Jul-18 shot

Paola Villefort Nova Serrana, Brazil 23-Jul-18 stabbed

Daiane Souza Porto Alegre, Brazil 26-Jul-18 shot

Gaby Arantes Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 28-Jul-18 beaten

Dudu dos Santos Duarte Paraisópolis, Brazil 3-Aug-18 shot

Lalesca Salvador, Brazil 5-Aug-18 throat cut

Paloma Ferreira Fortaleza, Brazil 6-Aug-18 shot

Paolla “LelÍ” Blayton Campos, Brazil 7-Aug-18 shot

Karlla da Silva Balbino Caratinga, Brazil 9-Aug-18 strangled/hanged

T‚nia Lopes Florianópolis, Brazil 10-Aug-18 shot

Renata Cabo de Santo Agostinho, Brazil 12-Aug-18 shot

Krispim Souza de Araujo Mossóro, Brazil 14-Aug-18 shot

D. M. Teixeira Mossóro, Brazil 20-Aug-18 shot

A. L. da Silva Bezerra Mossóro, Brazil 20-Aug-18 shot

Evelin Ferrari Caruaru, Brazil 21-Aug-18 shot

J. F. de Souza Curitiba, Brazil 23-Aug-18 stoned

Sheila dos Santos Buriticupu, Brazil 23-Aug-18 stoned

Paola dos Reis Cuiaba, Brazil 30-Aug-18 stabbed

Rayka Praia Grande, Brazil 30-Aug-18 Unknown

Unknown Name Manaus, Brazil 31-Aug-18 stabbed

Deia Alves Maciel Goiania, Brazil 1-Sep-18 stabbed

Maria Luíza Sao Paulo, Brazil 1-Sep-18 beaten

Rafaela Sena Xique-xique, Brazil 2-Sep-18 shot

Unknown Name Rio de Janeiro, Brazil 6-Sep-18 Unknown

Monique Manardi Lee Sao Paulo, Brazil 11-Sep-18 beaten

Abya Passos Mantovanny Cuiaba, Brazil 15-Sep-18 stabbed

Kemily Belem, Brazil 16-Sep-18 shot

J. Oliveira de Araújo Martins, Brazil 24-Sep-18 Unknown

Nicolly Lagarto, Brazil 26-Sep-18 beaten

Bolivia

Veronica Carbajal Pinto La Paz, Bolivia 27-Nov-17 suffocated

Adri Adely Jurado La Paz, Bolivia 13-Jul-18 stabbed

Chile

Paloma Santiago, Chile 14-Feb-18 beaten

Colombia

Marilyn Cipriany Guzmán Medellín, Colombia 30-Dec-17 shot

Chelsy/Cristal Grisales Molina La Virginia, Colombia 24-Jan-18 shot

Silvana Pineda La Dorada, Colombia 27-Jan-18 shot

J. A. Marín Marín Soacha, Colombia 1-Feb-18 stabbed

Tatiana/Tetris/Muelas Bogota, Colombia 10-Feb-18 stabbed

Alexa Amero Sierra Bogota, Colombia 9-Mar-18 stabbed

Lorena Molina López Montenegro, Colombia 25-Mar-18 shot

Alejandra Torres Torres Manizales, Colombia 22-Apr-18 stabbed

Abril Natasha Quiñónez Cali, Colombia 12-Aug-18 shot

Lili Chirinos Carrillo Valledupar, Colombia 18-Aug-18 shot in the head

Unknown Name Cordova, Colombia 31-Aug-18 Unknown

Carol Perez Guerrero Ciudad Bolivar, Colombia 22-Sep-18 shot

Unknown Name Cochabamba, Colombia 23-Sep-18 beaten

Valeria Sandoval Cali, Colombia 28-Sep-18 asphyxiated

Dominican Republic

Blanca La Vega, Dominican Republic 27-Jan-18 stabbed

Ecuador

Isabel Borja Suárez Quevedo, Ecuador 13-May-18 stabbed

El Salvador

Unknown Name Departamente de la Paz, El Salvador 30-Nov-17 Unknown

Unknown Name Chalchuapa, El Salvador 18-Jan-18 stabbed

Unknown Name Cuscatlan, El Salvador 8-Mar-18 stabbed

D. A. Portillo Jiménez El Salvador, El Salvador 21-Mar-18 stabbed

Geovanny Romero Ortiz Santa Ana, El Salvador 3-Jun-18 Unknown

Unknown Name Soyopango, El Salvador 31-Aug-18 Unknown

France

Flávia Luiza Paris, France 27-Dec-17 Unknown

Vanessa Campos Paris, France 17-Aug-18 shot

Fiji

Lucky Salavuki Suva, Fiji 17-May-18 stoned

Guatamala

E. G. Sarat Xela, Guatamala 27-Nov-17 shot

A. Sis Salama, Guatamala 16-Jul-18 shot

Yessika Ruedas Gómez Jalapa, Guatamala 28-Aug-18 stabbed

Débora Ramos Cordón Chiquimula, Guatamala 22-Sep-18 beaten

Honduras

Tyty San Pedro Sula, Honduras 23-Jan-18 Unknown

India

Mohit New Delhi, India 17-Dec-17 beaten

Devudamma Surya Narayana Anakapalle, India 24-Dec-17 burned

V. Alphonze Madurai, India 10-Apr-18 stabbed

Chanchal Aashiana, India 22-Apr-18 shot

Manju Khajrana, India 7-May-18 stabbed

Chandraiah Hyderabad, India 26-May-18 beaten

Italy

Ximena Garcia Nemi, Italy 10-Mar-18 Unknown

Rafaella Rotocalco Rome, Italy 11-Sep-18 Unknown

Unknown Name San Giorgio, Italy 23-Sep-18 stabbed

Mexico

Kendrika Itzel D Espino Chihuahua, Mexico 24-Nov-17 Unknown

Unknown Name Veracruz, Mexico 30-Nov-17 Unknown, one of four cases on this date

Unknown Name Veracruz, Mexico 30-Nov-17 Unknown, one of four cases on this date

Unknown Name Veracruz, Mexico 30-Nov-17 Unknown, one of four cases on this date

Unknown Name Veracruz, Mexico 30-Nov-17 Unknown, one of four cases on this date

Sandra Nuevo Leon, Mexico 30-Nov-17 beaten

Unknown Name Estado de Mexico, Mexico 7-Dec-17 stabbed

Geraldine Contreras Colima, Mexico 9-Dec-17 Unknown

C.N. Guerrero, Mexico 17-Dec-17 shot

Canoa Fortaleza, Mexico 17-Dec-17 shot

Unknown Name Veracruz, Mexico 31-Dec-17 tortured

G. Carrera Tamaulipas, Mexico 5-Jan-18 stabbed

Unknown Name Veracruz, Mexico 11-Jan-18 throat cut

Jessica González Veracruz, Mexico 11-Jan-18 Unknown

Paola Carranco Ciudad De Mexico, Mexico 26-Jan-18 shot

Brigith Quintara Roo, Mexico 27-Jan-18 shot

C. Antuan Guanajuato, Mexico 12-Feb-18 shot

Unknown Name Ciudad Victoria, Mexico 17-Feb-18 shot, one of three cases on this date

Unknown Name Ciudad Victoria, Mexico 17-Feb-18 shot, one of three cases on this date

Unknown Name Ciudad Victoria, Mexico 17-Feb-18 shot, one of three cases on this date

Samantha Guerrero, Mexico 6-Mar-18 Unknown

Unknown Name Sinaloa, Mexico 7-Mar-18 Unknown

Sheila Nayarit, Mexico 15-Mar-18 shot

Charly Puebla, Mexico 22-Mar-18 decapitated/dismembered

Yoselyn Veracruz, Mexico 4-Apr-18 Unknown

Grechen Alina Lara García Nuevo Leon, Mexico 9-Apr-18 tortured and suffocated

Unknown Name Nuevo Leon, Mexico 17-Apr-18 Tortured and strangled

Brisa Veracruz, Mexico 22-Apr-18 shot

Unknown Name Puebla, Mexico 23-Apr-18 stabbed

A. Jalisco, Mexico 25-Apr-18 stoned

Unknown Name Guerrero, Mexico 27-Apr-18 shot

Unknown Name Nuevo Leon, Mexico 21-May-18 suffocated

Yamileth Quintero Sinaloa, Mexico 24-May-18 shot

Maritza Harrera Guerrero, Mexico 25-May-18 stabbed

S. Antolli Chiapas, Mexico 29-May-18 stabbed

J. Martínez Cepeda Coahuila, Mexico 10-Jun-18 asphyxiatied and hit by a rock

Unknown Name Michoacan, Mexico 14-Jun-18 shot

Unknown Name Colima, Mexico 16-Jun-18 Unknown

Nataly Briyith Sánchez Chiapas, Mexico 19-Jun-18 Unknown

Alexa GutiÈrrez Aguascalientes, Mexico 24-Jun-18 Unknown

Katy Morelos, Mexico 24-Jun-18 shot

Unknown Name Chiapas, Mexico 30-Jun-18 Unknown, one of six cases on this date

Unknown Name Chiapas, Mexico 30-Jun-18 Unknown, one of six cases on this date

Unknown Name Chiapas, Mexico 30-Jun-18 Unknown, one of six cases on this date

Unknown Name Chiapas, Mexico 30-Jun-18 Unknown, one of six cases on this date

Unknown Name Chiapas, Mexico 30-Jun-18 Unknown, one of six cases on this date

Unknown Name Chiapas, Mexico 30-Jun-18 Unknown, one of six cases on this date

Unknown Name Estado de Mexico, Mexico 10-Jul-18 Unknown

Chanel Estado de Mexico, Mexico 15-Jul-18 shot

L. M. Cocom Guzmán Yucatan, Mexico 15-Jul-18 strangled

Alexa Altamirano Martínez Guanajuato, Mexico 23-Jul-18 beaten

Alaska Contreras Ponce Veracruz, Mexico 26-Jul-18 tortured

Linda Estado de Mexico, Mexico 26-Jul-18 suffocated

Unknown Name Guanajuato, Mexico 5-Aug-18 shot

M.R.M. Quintana Roo, Mexico 6-Aug-18 shot

J. C. M. Oaxaca, Mexico 12-Aug-18 shot

Unknown Name Guerrero, Mexico 30-Aug-18 shot

Jhoana Hernández Veracruz, Mexico 1-Sep-18 stabbed

Ana Corina Burgos Ciudad de Mexico, Mexico 11-Sep-18 shot

Azuani Díaz García Chilapa, Mexico 22-Sep-18 shot

Dayana Letran Acayucan, Mexico 26-Sep-18 shot

Paulina Domínguez Hernández Cotzacoalco, Mexico 27-Sep-18 shot

New Zealand

Zena Campbell Wellington, New Zealand 11-Feb-18 strangled/hanged

Pakistan

Spogmai Peshawar, Pakistan 26-Nov-17 shot

Chutki Peshawar, Pakistan 27-Mar-18 shot

Sheena Swabi, Pakistan 22-Apr-18 shot

Muni Kotkay, Pakistan 4-May-18 shot

Sania Hafizabad, Pakistan 20-Jul-18 shot

Nasir Naso Khyber Pakhtunkhwa Province, Pakistan 18-Aug-18 Aug-18

Unknown Name Sahiwal, Pakistan 6-Sep-18 burned

Paraguay

Ada Mía Naomi Gomez Rivas Piribebuy, Paraguay 27-Aug-18 stabbed

Nicol Ortellado Ferreira Puerto Oblidago, Paraguay 27-Sep-18 stabbed

Peru

J. E. Ruidíaz Fernández Lima, Peru 11-Feb-18 shot

Yamilet Iquitos, Peru 14-Mar-18 stabbed

Philippines

Unknown Name Pasay City, Philippines 23-Jan-18 Unknown

South Africa

Ousi Kagiso Rustenburg, South Africa 6-Jan-18 strangled/hanged

Gugu Modise Ventersdorp, South Africa 1-Sep-18 stabbed

Spain

Eli Valladolid, Spain 22-Sep-18 beaten

Trinidad and Tobago

Keon Alister Patterson St. Clair, Trinidad and Tobago 5-Dec-17 Shot

Turkey

I. Y. Zonguldak, Turkey 5-Dec-17 shot

Kader Ataman Ayvalik Sarimsakli, Turkey 13-Dec-17 shot

Kristina Beyoglu, Turkey 8-Mar-18 shot

Nefes Ankara, Turkey 10-Mar-18 strangled/hanged

Simge Avci Samsun, Turkey 13-Jul-18 shot

Begüm Bursa, Turkey 19-Aug-18 burned

Esra Ates Beyoglu, Turkey 25-Aug-18 stabbed

United Kingdom

Naomi Hersi London, United Kingdom 18-Mar-18 stabbed

United States of America

Brooklyn BreYanna Stevenson Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, United States of America 27-Nov-17 Shot to death

Brandi Seals Houston, Texas, United States of America 13-Dec-17 Shot

Zakaria “Z” Fry Albuquerque, New Mexico, United States of America Jan-18 Blunt force trauma

Christa Leigh Steele-Knudslien North Adams, Massachusetts, United States of America 6-Jan-18 Stabbed and bludgeoned

Viccky Gutierrez Los Angeles, California, United States of America 10-Jan-18 Undetermined

Celine Walker Jacksonville, Florida, United States of America 4-Feb-18 Shot

Tonya Harvey Buffalo, New York, United States of America 6-Feb-18 Shot

Phylicia Mitchell Cleveland, Ohio, United States of America 23-Feb-18 Shot

Amia Tyrae Berryman Baton Rogue, Louisiana, United States of America 26-Mar-18 Shot to death

Sasha Wall Chicago, Illinois, United States of America 1-Apr-18 Shot to death

Carla Patricia Flores-Pavon, United States of America Dallas, Texas 9-May-18 Strangled to death

Nino Fortson Atlanta, Georgia, United States of America 13-May-18 Shot multiple times

Gigi Pierce Portland, Oregon, United States of America 21-May-18 Shot

Antash’a Devine Sherrington English Jacksonville, Florida, United States of America 1-Jun-18 Shot

Diamond Stephens Meridian, Mississippi, United States of America 18-Jun-18 Shot

Cathalina Christina James Jacksonville, Florida, United States of America 24-Jun-18 Shot to death

Keisha “Pokey” Wells Cleveland, Ohio, United States of America 24-Jun-18 Shot and killed

Sasha Garden Orlando, Florida, United States of America 19-Jul-18 Undetermined

Dejanay Stanton Chicago, Illinois, United States of America 30-Aug-18 Shot to death

Vontashia Bell Shreveport, Louisiana, United States of America 30-Aug-18 Shot

Shantee Tucker Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States of America 5-Sep-18 Shot

Londonn Moore Port Charlotte, Florida, United States of America 8-Sep-18 Shot

Ciara Minaj Carter Frazier Chicago, Illinois, United States of America 3-Oct-18 Shot to death

Venezuela

Vicky Julieth Alvarado Moran, Venezuela 27-Jan-18 stabbed

Malvina Paiva Caracas, Venezuela 3-Mar-18 shot

China Colón Naguanagua, Venezuela 24-Apr-18 shot

Rosada Durán Romero Lara, Venezuela 17-May-18 shot

Carol Pérez Guerrero Bolivar, Venezuela 23-Sep-18 shot

[courtney-deserved-better]

whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)

this is a great question!!

if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing

for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works

slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits

and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.

(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)

as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.

right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.

but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!

ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:

[SIERRA]

MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.

Chef: hey!

Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married

Sierra: …can we just turn it off please

[COURTNEY]

DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—

MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?

ZARINA: And kick ass!

DAD: Zarina!

Video cuts out.

Alejandro: courtney you good?

Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter

Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]

[ALEJANDRO]

MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.

DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.

JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]

Alejandro: callate!

MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.

DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.

[NOAH]

MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!

ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!

RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]

MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?

Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—

ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!

LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.

BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding

ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!

JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.

Noah: [frozen, ashamed]

Sierra: well that was a mess

Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]

Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…

Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv

Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane

Chef: oh fuck

Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom

Everyone: …

Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems

Everyone: yeah ok sounds good

***

Courtney: so that sucked

Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok

Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like

Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx

***

Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you

Noah: yep

Alejandro: why?

Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi Steph!! I was wondering if you knew of any really long fics (like 25k or more) that are only one chapter, I travel a lot sometimes and some places don't really have good enough internet for multi chapter fics. So yeah, any really long one chapter fics about John and Sherlock would be appreciated. Thank you!

Hey Nonny!!

LOL OKAY FUNNY STORY. I almost replied to this with “oof I’ll have to read EVERYTHING so I’m sorry.... and then... I remembered.......

I put chapter counts on everything 🙃😐 

I’m not the brightest crayon in the box. 🖍 

Anyway, so yes, I can definitely rec you some fics! BUT I should also offer you two suggestions you can totally do to read ANY fic!

On Ao3, you can click on the “Entire Work” button to load ALL chapters of a fic (it’s the very first button along the top) and in turn you can then just read it all there! 

And the very last button along the top, you can Download copies of the fic to your phone or computer with eBook file types (AZw3 for Kindle, ePub for iPhone’s Books app, and MOBI is for other mobile devices and e-readers), the HTML if you want to read it as-is in a web-browser, or the PDF format which is a universal file format that is supported by everything, even web browsers, so it’s a good one to download if you don’t know what format you need :) If you read on an eReader, though, I can’t recommend enough just downloading the format for your device. You get to keep a copy of the fic AND the eReader keeps it nicely formatted. It’s a BRILLIANT, BEAUTIFUL feature that Ao3 gave us, because I like downloading all my fics and read them later in iBooks. Once you start that, Nonny, you can’t do it any other way. AND at the VERY END of the fics, it links BACK to the original post so you can bookmark, kudos, and comment on it!! <3

So yeah, two options you can do to solve your poopy internet and still read long fics hee hee! <3

ANYWAY EXCUSE FOR A NEW LIST LOL. 

ALSO, side note, check out @silentauroriamthereal; a large chunk of her fics are both long AND one chapter, so it’s a good place to go and she’s a brilliant author so I don’t think you’ll be disappointed! <3 Plus a lot of her fics are on this list, so I am sorry hahah.

AND I wanted to make the list a bit longer than I had, so I picked fics over 20K, if that’s alright :) As always, if you wrote a 20k+ single chapter fic, let us know!

SINGLE CHAPTER FICS OVER 20K WORDS

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w., 1 Ch. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John, Past Abuse, Insecure John, Reassuring / Caring Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Understanding Sherlock) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

The White Lotuses by SilentAuror (E, 20,340 w., 1 Ch. || Slow Burn, Domestic, Romance) – One day John realises that he just isn't where he belongs, which is back at Baker Street with Sherlock. So he goes back and Sherlock, in his own way, courts him. Romance.

Out of the Woods by SilentAuror (E, 20,471 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Romance, Slow Burn, Flirting, Drunk Sex, Practical Jokes, POV Sherlock, Bottomlock, Possessive John, Pining Sherlock, Frustrated Wanking, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, First Kiss/Time, Virgin Sherlock, Love Confessions, Soft Sherlock, Dancing, Bum Appreciation, Hanging out with the Yard) – Sherlock is fairly certain that John has taken to flirting with him of late, but can't be entirely certain of it. At least, not until a case takes them into a forest, along with Lestrade's team and something happens that will change everything about their lives...

You're On the Air by prettysailorsoldier (M, 20,616 w., 1 Ch. || Unilock, Matchmaking, Radio, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Sherlock POV, Pining Sherlock, Flirting, Bisexual John) – The Consulting Detective and The Woman dominate the airwaves of their university radio station, doling out advice on everything from meeting the parents to sexual positions. When their ratings start to dip before the holidays, however, manager Mike thinks it's time for some fresh blood, and who better to fill in the gaps than rugby captain--and notorious flirt--John Watson? Part 1 of 25 Days of Johnlock

whiskies neat by Ellipsical (E, 20,660 w., 15 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting, POV Second Person Sherlock, Slow Burn, One Night Stand, Rimming, Blow Jobs, Anal, Soldier John, Crying, Emotional Lovemaking, Switchlock) – Home and hearth and whiskies neat, or, alternatively, Sherlock Holmes falls in love.

Achieving the Together-Coloured Instant by teahigh (E, 20,776 w., 1 Ch. || Est. Rel, PTSD, Codependency, Fluff & Angst, H/C, Smut, Demisexual Sherlock, Experiments) – John wonders if this is how it’s going to be: A life speaking in code, because they’re both too stupid to figure out how to say, “I love you.”

Winter's Delights by Kate_Lear (E, 21,173 w., 1 Ch. || Holmes Family, Christmas, Fake Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Bed Sharing, Domestics) – Sherlock takes John home for Christmas to meet the extended Holmes family. Part 1 of Winter's Delights

Love Is by SilentAuror (E, 21,508 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, UST / URT, Post HLV, Romance) – At Mrs Hudson’s urging, Sherlock finally decides to tell John how he feels about him. Part 1 of Love Is

echoes through time by chellefic (E, 21,619 w., 1 Ch. || First Time, Romance, ACD & BBC, Epistolary) – Mummy sends a trunk from the Holmes cottage in Sussex to 221B. Its contents alter the way John and Sherlock see themselves and one another.

Ghost Stories by SwissMiss (M, 22,256 w., 1 Ch. || Pining, Holmes Family, Christmas, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Bed Sharing, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, First Time) – Sherlock's parents think he and John are a couple. They might be onto something.

Sonatina in G Minor by SilentAuror (E, 22,574 w., 1 Ch. || Case Fic, POV Sherlock, Angst, UST, Sherlock’s Violin, Post-S3, Romance) – John has come back to Baker Street, but Sherlock doesn't understand the strange tension between them, even after he begins teaching John to play the violin at John's request.

The Kepler Problem by kinklock (E, 24,270 w., 1 Ch. || Sci-Fi AU, Alien Sherlock, Space Repairman John, Alien Biology, Horny John) – Working in uncharted space exploration was not as exciting as John had hoped, especially when it turned out to be mostly bot maintenance on uninhabited planets. However, the mystery of the repeated, unexplained malfunctions on planet BAK 2212 might turn out to be exactly the kind of adventure he'd been craving.

26 Pieces by Lanning (E, 28,236 w., 1 Ch. || H/C, Torture, First Time, Happy Ending, Schmoop, Past Abuse) – Mycroft gives Sherlock the apparently simple task of solving a puzzle box containing a stolen microchip. It isn't simple.

The Wisteria Tree by SilentAuror (E, 29,773 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3, Emotional Love Making, Amnesia/Memory Loss, Sherlock Loves John So Much, Sherlock POV, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, First Times, Hurt/Comfort, Est. Rel., Retirement) – Sherlock wakes up from a month-long coma only to discover that he has no memory of the previous six years to his own shock as well as John's...

Shallow Grave by SilentAuror (E, 31,672 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, Angst, HLV Fix It, Infidelity, Pining Sherlock, First Person POV Sherlock) – Starts as Sherlock's plane is taking off at the end of His Last Vow. When he finds out that Moriarty is alive and that he's being recalled from his mission, Sherlock decides that he should have told John how he felt before he left. So he walks off the plane and kisses him.

The Midas Touch by flawedamythyst (E, 32,231 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Magical Realism || John has a Magical Cock, Dub Con, Healer John) – John Watson has a medical condition that means everyone he sleeps with is instantly healed of all illness and injury. This causes complications when Sherlock breaks his arm, and even more complications when Sherlock falls in love with him. Yes, this is a story where John has a literal magic healing cock. It's a lot less cracky than you're probably imagining. Warning: Contains complex issues of sexual consent, although not between Sherlock and John.

The Whore of Babylon Was a Perfectly Nice Girl by out_there (E, 32,897 w., 1 Ch. || Past Drug Use, Blowjobs, Toplock, Mentions of Switching, Rough Sex, Background Cases, Sherlock’s Past, Sherlock’s Sexual History, Experienced Sherlock, Past One Night Stands, Fingering, Cuddling, Possessive Sherlock, Paris Holiday, Bed Sharing, Naked Lie-Ins, Bathing Together, Confessions, Worried Sherlock, Laying in Bed All Day, Meddling Mycroft, Naked Lazy Day) – Sherlock walks into a room and takes all the space right out of it. He does the same inside John's head.

Our Enthusiasms Which Cannot Always Be Explained by withoutawish (M, 32,961 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas, Fluff and Angst, H/C, Post-TRF, Case Fic, Mild Gore, Sherlock Whump) – The list that is tacked haphazardly on the refrigerator of 221B reads, ‘Kidney(s), and/or a full cadaver (preferably male, late 30s, under six feet tall), bag of fresh toes, sixteen cow’s eyes (corneas retained), dual exhaust hand –held flame thrower, an unopened first edition copy of Joseph Conrad’s 'Heart of Darkness', and no less than ten abhorrently gruesome murders in the upcoming month.” The one neatly hanging next to it simply reads, “Sex.” One of these lists is not John Watson’s. If John Watson were to put what he really wanted in list form, to live in a land somewhere beyond ‘almosts' now that Sherlock Holmes has indeed returned to him, he would never be able to look his flatmate in the eye ever again.

Bedtime Stories by Liketheriver (M, 34,388 w., 1 Ch. || Emotional H/C, Romance, Angst & Humour, Bed Sharing, John First Person, TRF, John Whump) – John's POV during Season 2 and beyond when Sherlock takes up semi-permanent residence in his bed. A collection of codas and missing scenes wrapped up into one long fic and topped with a bow that takes the story beyond Reichenbach and into happy territory once more. Part 1 of Bedtime Universe

The Yellow Poppies by SilentAuror (E, 34,952 w., 1 Ch. || H/C, Nightmares, HLV Fix-It, PTSD, Trauma, POV Sherlock, Doctor John) – Sherlock is threatened and assaulted in the hospital immediately after having been shot in the heart, first by Mary, then by Magnussen. As he recovers at Baker Street with John and plans the attack on Appledore with Mycroft, he fights to work through the trauma caused by these two visits. Set during His Last Vow.

The Unfinished Letters by SilentAuror (E, 37,391 w., 1 Ch. || Post S3 / S3 / HLV Fix it, Angst with Happy Ending, Romance, Infidelity, Depression, Case Fic, POV Third Person Sherlock, Love Confessions, Pining Sherlock, Letters) – A fire at Baker Street leads John to read something he was never intended to see: a notebook of half-written, unfinished letters Sherlock wrote during his time away...

Set in Stone by SilentAuror (E, 39,309 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, Wedding, Therapy, Fluff and Angst) – Sherlock and John are back from Ravine Valley and planning their wedding. However, as they move past the trial of the human traffickers, Sherlock can't help but wonder if he's imagining that John is becoming a little distant. Surely he isn't getting cold feet about the wedding... Part 2 of The Ravine Valley series

Act IV by SilentAuror (E, 39,707 w., 1 Ch. || First Person POV Sherlock, HLV Fix-It, Infidelity, Angst, Drama) – After Sherlock is shot, John moves back into Baker Street. They spend the autumn together as John tries to make sense of his life and make some important decisions about both Mary and Sherlock. Canon-compliant, excerpts from His Last Vow.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by SilentAuror (E, 50,635 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4/S4 Divergence, Case Fic, For a Case / Reverse Fake-Relationship, Conferences, Marriage Equality, Travelling / New York, Pride, Homophobia, Bottomlock, Marriage Proposal, John POV, Sexuality, Love Confessions, Emotional Love Making, Public Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Passionate Kissing, Needy/Clingy Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Touching / Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, Little Spoon Sherlock, Intense Orgasms) – John and Sherlock go to New York to attend a conference run by the National Defence of Traditional Marriage Coalition in order to investigate the potential bombing of the annual Manhattan Pride parade. As the conference unfolds, John finds himself repulsed by the toxic ideology being presented, which becomes relevent to his own unacknowledged issues and his friendship with Sherlock...

[adraveins]

Tagged by @yanara126, thank you!

How many works do you have on AO3?

53 at the moment!

What’s your total AO3 word count?

695,726 words. Holy shit.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 

1. solivagant: A Breath of the Wild oneshot collection about Link interacting with various NPCs. Technically not a WIP, since it’s a series of oneshots meant to carry on for as long as my interest held, but I’ll probably come back to it when BOTW... 2!!! comes out. It definitely needs some editing, at least.

2. kith and kin and 3. last ones standing: Two fics I wrote in a frenzy after watching the first season of The Umbrella Academy. Most fic is not something I write out of disappointment, but these were definitely born out of a sense of “I could fix him (the show)” and feeling robbed of certain character dynamics. And the fact that these are oneshots/two-shots of gen relationships with so many kudos... that fandom is WAY responsive.

4. anthropotheism: A Horizon Zero Dawn post-game WIP about Aloy searching for the rogue AIs. I desperately want to come back to this one, but the problem is that it really does need to be rewritten. It’s good! But it’s not up to my current standards, because when I started it, I hadn’t written anything substantial for a while, and I was way out of practice. So I’m not sure what to do with this one yet.

5. the sword of damocles: A Magnus Archives WIP and “no apocalypse but things are still wack” AU after Season 4 that just keeps getting stalled because life in the past year and a half has consisted of a pandemic, starting a new job, moving to a new home, multiple hurricanes, chronic illness flare-ups, etc. It’s been a time.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I try to respond to every comment, even if all I have the stamina for is a simple “thank you.” I want people to know that I appreciate their reactions and feedback, because I know it takes time to sit down and read something and then offer input.

What’s the fic with the angstiest ending?

In the interest of not giving easy answer about something involving death, I’m going to say that “a truth whispered at night” is very angsty despite ending on a good note, since it’s about -- and massive spoilers for the book series The Keys to the Kingdom -- the vast gap between a boy-turned-god and his father after said boy-turned-god gives his unknowing father a replacement son/copy of himself. It’s mad fucked up if you think about it for too long.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I actually sat here and put some thought into this, about which fic of mine most embodies joy, since most of what I write is pretty squarely melancholic. I’m going to list two:

1. lightmonger: This recent Pillars fic in which Kit and Bekarna and Onekaza all vaguely flirt in each other’s directions and talk about the stars. I think it’s joyful because Bekarna simply has that effect on people and thus on my writing.

2. love you in my own language: A fic for the The Vagrant trilogy, set after the first book, in which the titular unnamed Vagrant and his husband (ft. their napping daughter) build their house and practice communication. I brought this AO3 tag into existence, lol.

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve ever written? 

Like @yanara126 said, they mostly exist in my head. I’ve come up with a lot of narrative swaps in, like, bulleted post format, and actually, I think that Venom AU for Pillars is probably the wildest. Not exactly a crossover, but I enjoy the mental exercise of reformatting a story to fit into another world and its plot/concepts.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No. Most of my stuff is too niche for that, and I’ve been told that I’m “friendly but unapproachable,” so hopefully that will continue to stave off weirdos on the Internet.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

No, I’m not particularly interested in it.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I guess not? Not that I would know, lol. I simply do not pay attention to most things.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I can’t remember which ones, but I’ve had a few requests.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I’ve co-written things as part of RPs and such when I was a teenager, but not lately.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I don’t know about all-time, but I will say that I’m once again in some feelings about Jin/Yuna from Ghost of Tsushima, and I’m going to start citing them as the Correct way to do subtle, understated, well-written Video Game Romance.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? 

I am far too proud and stubborn to have an answer for this.

What are your writing strengths?

Intense dialogue, mood and straight up vibes, character dynamics, technical skill.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Reusing phrases, keeping character voices distinctive in prose and not just dialogue (although I’ve been working on this), figuring out the balance between “less is more” and just fucking say it in no uncertain terms (whatever it may be), sustaining commitment (lol). In general I wish that I was better at easily switching between styles too. I’m getting there.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? 

“Oh god, what if I sound like an idiot.”

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Man, I don’t even know. I think it might have been Narnia? Like, sixteen years ago.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

This is a difficult one, since the answer always changes. For Pillars, I do really like “a violent collision,” because I enjoy Eothas and Waidwen’s dynamic, and taking little hints from canon and trying to expand them into something coherent. In general, I’ll give a shoutout to a recent Control fic, “the name of the sound,” because it turned out much better than I thought it would, considering it’s from the POV of a semi-sentient eldritch building, and it’s given me a lot of “will you PLEASE write more like this?” feelings @ my brain. I think I just have the most fun when I’m writing about weird things.

[thegirlwhohasnochill]

The Disease of Addiction

Euphoria Special Episode Part 1: Rue (Recap & Review)

Before I begin my official review of this episode, I would like to preface my thoughts with a bit of a primer about spoilers and trigger warnings. The show covers a range of topics from addiction to mental health. Still, I specifically want to warn anyone reading that I explicitly talk about and mention the topic of suicide in my review. If this is triggering for you in any way, please, don’t read ahead and take care of yourself! Okay, that’s it; I hope you enjoy my thoughts, and please let me know if you have any feedback or comments for my review and things I can change or fix in the future.

Where to begin with such a loaded episode...we knew the format and style of the episode would be simplistic based on the current realities of filming amidst a pandemic and what we saw to be a scene from Season 2 that the creator Sam Levinson expanded upon. Zendaya herself let us know that the episode's storytelling method would be vastly different from what we’ve already seen on the show. The format and simplicity of the episode, in contrast to the loaded dialogue and content of the scenes, are perfect. The camera takes you right into the middle of these conversations with Rue and Ali. But before we can even dive into what they talk about, we have to address the elephant in the room that is Rules. The episode begins with what is probably one of the most gut-wrenching sequences I have seen on the show. Because we know the reality and truth of their current predicament, Rue’s peppered kisses across Jules’ body and her tight squeezes and hugs from behind Jules evoke a strong sense of loss and pain for the viewer. The sheer intensity of the physicality of Rue’s affection for Jules is so overpowering and overwhelmingly present, we can almost feel the imbalance in their relationship through the screen. There is something to be said for the harsh reality of Rue’s dependence on Jules being reflected even in such a non-objective dream-like sequence. And yet, even in Rue’s wildest dreams and happiest stupor, she does not imagine the sobriety of her future. To me, that is indeed the crux of her character and the essence of this episode. Ali himself says, “The point is your sobriety.” And while it may feel like a focal point of discussion, the conversation flows in a way that seems to bounce back and forth between the two like a simple tennis match. It is easy to follow between Ali’s most potent clearest convictions about how the world works and Rue’s drug-addled hazy perception. The inherent contrast between their mental states and the different points of life in which they are both standing hit the viewer at alternate moments.

But we know Rue is not sober even as she lies to Ali and stumbles out of the bathroom, the shaky camerawork conveying her recent use. She is wearing the same shirt from the dream but has her signature hoodie on, her messy curly locks running down her back and glassy eyes staring straight ahead. The scene moves from her imagination of life with Jules to her lies about use. Her eventual admittance to being a high-functioning user happens as quickly as the conversation moves from sobriety to faith.

So I might be biased and hence don’t think I am incorrect in admitting that Zendaya has never given us a bad performance in her life. Even as she lies to Ali’s face and he is quick to call out her apparent contradictions, the faint slurring of her voice and her glazed eyes tell all. As striking as the conversation is, it feels even stranger for me to admit I felt comforted by Rue’s confession to thoughts of ending her life. And even as she admits to the darkest moments in her mind, Ali’s face and reaction are an even better neutralizer for what would generally be such an alarming thing to say to someone you barely know. As they continue to discuss her eventual relapse and all the reasons behind it (including racing thoughts encompassing “all the things I remember and all the things I wish I didn’t”), the viewer can envision the sequence of events that was shown to us in the finale - her fights with her mother and sister, her first time using when her father was fast asleep, her father’s death, her sister finding her after her overdose.

As much as I would like to quote the entire episode, I have to say Ali’s monologue about the idea that none of us are born evil and that society views mental illness and addiction as a personal moral failure rather than an overarching system many of us are incapable of overcoming, to be one of, if not the most decisive moments of the entire show. The line about coming out of the womb with “a few wires crossed” but still a beautiful baby girl eventually messing her way up through life struck a chord in me. I didn’t ask to be born this way. I don’t feel in control of my mind or the way it ever seems to work. And I’m always going to be a bad person. The disease of addiction and mental illness lets you - no, it makes you - view everything you have ever done in your life as not a consequence of the way your mind works, but as an active choice, you have consistently made, as you screwed up everything you’ve ever loved, and let down everyone you have ever cared about. The disease is not you as a person or even the way you think, and yet it is powerful enough to feel that way. Almost like the rapid cycling between mania and depression, the disease flips between, making you feel like the most powerful, invincible person alive and the absolute scum of the earth. There is nothing in between.

Ali’s backstory and his monologues about his change in faith from Christianity (when he was previously known as Martin) to Islam and the world's revolutions were fascinating. Side note: I did think the line about women converting to Islam was unnecessary, but I digress.

Rue’s understanding of the Narcotics Anonymous program's steps was the perfect way to bring in the conversation of faith. As she mentions her difficulty in coming to terms with the idea that there is greater power in charge of her behaviour and the way she surrenders herself to drugs, Ali chimes in with, “You don’t believe there is a power on Earth greater than Rue.” She disagrees and continues quoting and citing different sources she believes to be omniscient and great. And I absolutely agree with her. To me, there is no greater power than the source of art, the music that keeps me going, that feels like it’s the only thing keeping me from stopping the blood pumping through my veins. I understand Rue. But I also understand Ali. And yet, when Rue goes on to talk about the inexplicable workings of the world, my heart stops. There is no reason. There is no reason for the absolute pain and loss and suffering I’ve experienced, for the trauma I’ve witnessed and endured. For the absolutely horrifying things, the people closest to me have lived through. It is merely chaos. There is no reason I wake up every single day, regretting the fact that I did indeed wake up and that I am alive and breathing. So I Understand Rue. But Ali’s monologue about the moral arc of the universe and the unfathomable ways in which life and history line themselves up, to open our very eyes to the realizations we come to daily, is overwhelming. And yet, while he is waxing poetic about the intricacies of the world, we can see Rue’s exhausted eyes glaze over further, still unimpressed. “Maybe I’ll start a revolution like Malcolm X or something”, she quips back. But Ali is quick to counter; revolutions are no longer revolutionary.

Life as we know it is hypocrisy and foolish symbolism, only emphasizing his point about the universe's ridiculousness. Does any of it have meaning? Or is the meaningless void just another puzzle piece in a picture we will never get to see? There is also something to be said about Rue’s facial expressions as Ali continues his train of thought about her “generation”. As we often do when we hear our elders dismissively brush off our many concerns, she almost rolls her eyes. But he is listening, and he knows. “You think you’re out here fighting a revolution, and Bank of America is on your side? Give me a fucking break.” He’s not wrong. His speech reminds me of the masses of teens on TikTok creating video content specifically catered to an audience with an aesthetic that glamorizes the image of a revolutionary teen hero. But instead of a blazing bow and arrow, it is the common cell phone and a punchy soundtrack filtered through digitized audio. What would typically come across as preachy in any show catered to teens is, in fact, poignant. It also reminds me of how self-aware Euphoria is, knowing it’s guilty of falling into the same trap it accuses the viewer of doing.  

You have to commit to bettering yourself, Ali essentially tells Rue. And to me, that is the most inherently human struggle we will ever face in our lifetimes. As long as we exist, we have to face the idea that each day is, in fact, not going to be easier than the last. And when he tells her that he believes in her and that the hope of her success (that may one day come) should be greater than the failure of her current demise holding her back, I want to cry. I keep thinking about that edit of Rue to this is me trying by Taylor Swift.

The music of the song that Jules has texted to Rue swells, and it is easy to get caught up in the angst of the moment. It accompanies the words, “I miss you.” And if it wasn’t for Ali’s conversation with his daughter as background noise, one would simply soak in the gut-wrenching pain of their separation. The juxtaposition of Ali trying his absolute best to cling to his family as Rue continues to isolate herself from her loved ones and push herself further into the abyss makes my heart physically hurt.

Ms. Marsha’s spell-binding words of wisdom about sobriety and relationships compared to Rue’s tired exhaustion imminently displayed on her face make the viewer a little wary of what comes next. Her misunderstanding of a juvenile relationship with Jules is made clear when Ali confronts her about the fact that the two of them never had a real conversation about their feelings for one another. Rue’s distrust in the idea that things will eventually work themselves out stems from the fact that she feels disappointed by how her loved ones have left her so far. She eventually spirals into this negatively destructive way of thinking. She cognitively recognizes and justifies getting left behind because she thinks and believes she deserves terrible things in life. She lists examples of past deeds to further cement her argument. But Ali counters back with the simple statement that “Drugs change who you are as a person.” Regardless of her actions, he believes she is still a genuinely good individual while she argues that she is absolutely not. My favourite part of this whole conversation and the entire episode is the manner in which Ali questions Rue’s negative cognitive patterns. Her brain and mind essentially excuse bad behaviour by convincing her that she will never be a good person. Hence she can never forgive herself, and thus, she will continue to remain in this cyclical pattern. Our actions may be inexcusable, but they do not line up with our intentions. The inevitable human struggle is not whether we are fundamentally good or bad, evil, flawed or perfect, but if we are (and again, not to quote my other favourite show, The Good Place) trying to be a better person than we previously were. If we recognize that our actions are wrong and we are capable of experiencing remorse and regret for said actions, who's to say we are entirely incapable of change. This reductive polarizing, and dismissive way of thinking is characteristic of the brains of most people living with a mental illness. Our outside influences, such as drugs, can all be contributing external factors to how we conduct ourselves through life. Ali’s short bit about redemption and human beings deeming actions unforgivable forever can easily be paralleled to direct conversations we have online about “cancel culture”. The phenomenon of dismissing and reducing someone to their mistakes instead of allowing them to grow from them is a nice sentiment. Still, if we do not truly take accountability into action and witness no real changes or remorse, we can quickly get stuck in that cycle. Even if our beliefs do not line up with our actions, drugs can eventually change that. The belief system we hold so dearly, the convictions we strongly feel, can all be washed away by the simple use of drugs, Ali explains as he tells Rue about his family background. His experiences with abuse and his eventual hypocrisy as he plays the role he always feared in his family leave the viewer speechless. As we watch him tell his tale of regret, there is no woe or sorrow in admitting he is or isn’t a fundamentally good or bad person, just the thought of his attempt to change his ways that impacts the viewer.

As the viewer waits with bated breath to see what comes out of Rue’s mouth next, it is not a surprise (to me personally). Rue has no intention of staying sober because she has no intention of staying alive much longer. Ali asks her why she feels that way. She responds with her sentiments about the cruelty of the world. Ali understands. We truly are living in dark times, witnessing truly horrific events, and the fact that we even have the capacity to care any longer is indicative of our will to stay alive. It doesn’t make much sense when you think about it, but when you are so sad, so grief-stricken by the news, by the world’s turn of events, by the mere thought of witnessing more tragedy that you cannot bear to be alive any longer, it means that you are deeply invested. Invested in the way things will turn out even if you do not personally believe you want to participate or even be privy to being complicit in a system that does nothing but churn out pain, anger, and hatred. When I was at the lowest point in my life and attempted to end my own life, I was overwhelmed by the goings-on of the world. As emotionally drained as Rue is, a part of her still cares. She wants her sister and mother to know that she really tried. Just as I wanted and still want my parents and friends to be okay without me when I do eventually leave this earth. Of course, I care about what happens to them. The idea that suicide or suicidal ideation is inherently selfish is so contradictory to the reality of how suicidal individuals genuinely feel. It is the opposite. We care more than most, and we care to the point that it hurts to extend another moment of kindness to ourselves amid all the chaos and madness of the world. But still, we try. We do our best. Ali believes in Rue. He has faith in her.

The entire episode ends on a melancholy note as Rue and Ali depart the diner with Rue wistfully staring out the window as he drives her home. Ali loves his conversations with Rue and vice-versa. The fact that two people can be sitting at a diner alone on Christmas Eve talking about the beauty and cruelty of the world and everything ranging from politics to addiction to suicide to love to family and anything in between goes to show us that humans will always find a way. The fact that two people struggling and suffering from addiction can find their own way about and amidst the chaos of the world and still have these meaningful conversations about life and existence tells us that ultimately, Trouble Don’t Last Always.

[erisbaek]

Stucky Fic Rec [Part One]

So I decided to split the fic recs up into parts because they will be too long otherwise. In each part I will link the Google Doc that I am typing them up in, which is where I will constantly update as I read.  Within these fic recs, they’re mostly my preferences, so very few (if any) Shrinkyclinks, and ABO fics will be within them, as well as shorter fics, since I actively seek fics out that are longer than 10k (and completed)!!

The Google Doc Link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/10wqr5s-CzkFzLidQgt-y4-cjudHWwVeVPWCedMjK7t0/edit?usp=sharing

The first part is formatted under the cut, if you’d prefer to stay out of the doc!

Lightning in a Bottle 

    Word Count: 63k     Rating: Explicit     Notable Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Road Trip!AU, Angst with Happy Ending     Warnings: Smut, Smoking     Synopsis: The problem, Steve thinks, isn’t so much his motorcycle giving up the ghost on a lonely stretch of highway through a lonely stretch of the country. He doesn’t mind stretching his legs or the prospect of hitchhiking. The problem is the roiling black blanket of storm clouds slowly spreading itself over the landscape headed his direction… Steve Rogers is looking to hitch on a highway abandoned by everyone smart enough to avoid a looming storm. Bucky Barnes is the professional storm chaser who offers him a ride.

It gets more complicated from there.

Perspective and Truth

        Word Count: 16.7k          Rating: Teen and Up         Notable Tags: Bodyswap!AU, Emotional Hurt/Comfort        Warnings: None        Synopsis: Bucky and Steve end up swapping bodies and learning a lot more about each other in the process

Carbs and Conversations

         Word Count: 48k          Rating: Teen and Up          Notable Tags: Hockey!AU, No Powers          Warnings: None          Synopsis: Bucky was just looking for a chance. A chance to get on the ice and play. A chance to escape from Hydra. A chance to redeem himself. He didn't include 'A chance to be friends with Steve Rogers' on the list. That would be ridiculous. Lucky for him, Steve seemed determined to be ridiculous.

So Loud and So Clear

           Word Count: 26.6k            Rating: Mature            Notable Tags: Get Together, Slow Build            Warnings: None           Synopsis: Bucky had been careful, after all, leaving no trace of his comings and goings. It was horrendously disappointing to know that Rogers had found him. Bucky was a lot better than getting caught by a guy who wore the American flag as a onesie. He just really was. “Don’t you – Bucky – Bucky,” Rogers started, and to Bucky’s growing horror, it looked like Rogers was on the verge of some type of emotional eclipse. Anger, sadness, something, and Bucky wanted nothing to do with it. “Hate to break it to you, bud, but I don’t remember ever living here and I don’t remember you.”

A Loyal Viewer 

           Word Count: 36.1k            Rating: Explicit             Notable Tags: Camboy!Steve, Punk!Bucky, No Powers, Long Distance            Relationship            Warnings: Smut            Synopsis: At almost exactly eight thirty in the evening, Steve settles on the bed before his camera and the computer. He signs into his account on Chaturbate and clicks the button that starts his stream.

In My Conditions, Love’s the Best Physician

             Word Count: 9.1k              Rating: Not Rated              Notable Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Pharmacist!Bucky, Russian!Bucky              Warnings: None              Synopsis: ”This situation is a little more delicate because I don't even know if he speaks English and I'm tired of going down to the pharmacy for constipation medication and allergy pills when I haven't sneezed since 1941.” Steve shouts. The room falls silent, and he turns back around to find four pairs of stunned eyes watching him. Tony, as always, speaks first. “He?” - Or the one where Bucky is a hot pharmacist and Steve keeps making up bullshit reasons to go see him.

Rare Is This Love (Keep It Covered) 

               Word Count: 66.7k                Rating: Explicit                 Notable Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Mechanic!Bucky, Slow Burn                Warnings: Smut, Canonical Character Death                Synopsis: It's 2014. Captain America has been out of the ice for three years and is trudging along, saving the world and trying to get used to living in the future. Steve thinks he knows how the rest of his life is going to pan out – a life of duty, which he chose when he signed up to be Erskine’s science experiment. But then, he meets Bucky Barnes: the out-of-this-world-gorgeous mechanic and war vet, who turns Steve’s life upside down and makes him question everything he thought he knew. Slowly, Steve comes to realize there is more to life than duty and punching Nazis. Just one problem though: how on earth does a 96-year-old virgin who only just realized he may not be entirely straight make the transition from crush to relationship? Cue healthy amounts of self-doubt, awkward flirting, pretty blushing, existential crises, emotional growth, and maybe, possibly, a sexual awakening.

Looking For A Place To Hide

                Word Count: 33.3k                 Rating: Explicit                 Notable Tags: Endgame Fix-It, 2012!Steve                 Warnings: Smut                 Synopsis:  It's 2012 and all Steve knows is that another version of himself said Bucky is alive. Steve will do anything to get his friend back, even if it means time traveling to 2023. He expects Bucky to be happy to see him, but instead he's wary, hurt. Turns out his Steve had left him for Peggy. How? Why? Steve can't believe it. Now he'll have to find a way to make sense of it all, and convince Bucky that it's the two of them to the end of the line.

The Wolf and the Sheep

               Word Count: 50.5k                Rating: Teen and Up                Notable Tags: Shield Agent!Steve, Winter Soldier!Bucky                 Warnings: None                Synopsis: Steve Rogers is a SHIELD agent who is recruited for a secret project: Becoming a handler for the Asset. Steve’s world is thrown for a loop when he discovers the Asset is an actual person and he needs to figure out who he is and what he’s going to do.

All Those Little Pieces

                 Word Count: 40.5k                  Rating: Mature                  Notable Tags: Alternating POV, Post CATW                  Warnings: Smut, Panic Attacks                  Synopsis: Steve has never forgotten Bucky Barnes. Not their childhood together, not the horror of the moment Bucky fell too far for him to reach, and not the way he's loved him all the while. Bucky has forgotten everything about Steve, at least at first. But there's still a feeling there, warm in his chest—and maybe now that he's found his way back to Steve Rogers and his sunny apartment, there's a chance it might turn into something more.

My Dear

                   Word Count: 29.9k                    Rating: Explicit                     Notable Tags: Post CATWS, Recovery                    Warnings: Smut                    Synopsis: The Soldier stares down at the floor, breathing hard through his nose. “And you still wanna fix me,” he says. Steve shakes his head. “There’s nothing to fix, Buck. I just want to bring you home.”

Living On My Own

                    Word Count: 26.1k                     Rating: Mature                     Notable Tags: Vigilante!Bucky                      Warnings: Blood and Gore                     Synopsis: James Barnes is back in the world and finds that not only has there been 1) an alien invasion, but 2) Howard Stark had a kid. One that dispenses unsolicited life advice, no less. Oh, and 3) Captain America is alive again, after getting himself killed by his own recklessness in a move so stupid only Steve could have come up with it. In which James learns to do laundry, turns into an accidental neighborhood vigilante and makes Tony Stark a happy grease monkey, all while he figures out where to stake his claim.

Chase the Lighting From the Sky

                      Word Count: 39.4k                       Rating: Explicit                        Notable Tags: No Powers, Age Gap, Farm!AU                        Warnings: Smut, Past Character Death, Animal Death                       Synopsis: If Bucky has to be stuck doing this ridiculous summer work program before his senior year of college, on a ranch in the middle of nowhere, then at least he’s got a hot as hell cowboy for a boss and host. Steve Rogers, owner of the Truth & Justice Ranch, is what Bucky’s completely theoretical but very imaginative bisexual fantasies are made of. Steve’s a widower though, and a nice guy in need of help, and no doubt 100% straight… so Bucky’s gonna work his ass off and keep his head down. But neither Bucky nor Steve are prepared for the friendship that forms between them as they work side by side. And they certainly aren’t expecting the budding feelings, confessions, and passions that summer heat and the loneliness of the great open plains stirs in each of them. What rages to life between them will shake each man to his core and will linger long after the storms and the summer have passed.

Cinder and Smoke

                       Word Count: 51.7k                        Rating: Explicit                        Notable Tags: Sheriff!Steve, Blacksmith!Bucky, Old Western                        Warnings: Smut, Period-Typical Homophobia, OC Death                        Synopsis: “They say there’s no law in Parasapa. Is that true?”

Art Thief, Heart Thief

                       Word Count: 58.8k                        Rating: Mature                        Notable Tags: FBI!Steve, Thief!Bucky Barnes                        Warnings: Smut                        Synopsis: Agent Steve Rogers is facing a series of art thefts that has him stumped, and looking for a break in the case. Convicted art thief and general high end criminal Bucky Barnes wants to make parole and happens to know all of the right people who could make Steve's job easier. So they strike a deal, mutually beneficial and entirely business. But a few days undercover, an undeniable growing chemistry, and some ill-timed Feelings entering the mix, and all bets are off.

Laws of Thermodynamics 

                       Word Count: 14.6k                        Rating: Explicit                         Notable Tags: Post CATWS, Recovery                         Warnings: Smut                        Synopsis: He never had to relearn how to love Steve Rogers. It might be the one thing he never forgot.

Abstract Art

                       Word Count: 26.6k                        Rating: Teen and Up                        Notable Tags: Friends to Lovers, Artist!Steve, Ex Sniper!Bucky                        Warnings: None                        Synopsis: They survive almost a year of torture together, cells side by side, banter and teasing and stories. They keep each other alive. Then everything changes. They tell Bucky that Rogers's been killed. He tries to piece his life together, to move on. Steve owns an art store. He's given up looking. It's over. Except it's really not.

We Discovered Gold

                       Word Count: 18.7k                        Rating: Explicit                        Notable Tags: Post CACW, Fix-It, Wakanda                         Warnings: Smut                        Synopsis: “So you got these safe houses scattered all over Russia?” Steve jokes into the soft hair over Bucky's temple, not pulling away, “Or did we just get lucky?” Bucky shakes his head and then replies, “Got myself a few. It’s been a long two years.” “Yeah pal,” Steve nods, burrowing further, “I hear that.”

Never Mind to Hold 

                      Word Count: 21.6k                       Rating: Mature                       Notable Tags: Soulmate!AU, Not CACW Compliant, Soulmarks                       Warnings: Brief Suicidal Ideation                       Synopsis: Steve didn't know the name of Bucky's soulmate. He wasn't even sure when it had appeared across Bucky's heart. But Steve knew it wasn't his name hidden under that patch.

Where There’s Smoke 

                      Word Count: 95.1k                       Rating: Explicit                        Notable Tags: Firefighter!AU                       Warnings: Smut                       Synopsis: Steve is a Brooklyn firefighter who is about to be saddled with a new, rookie crewmate. James Barnes is that rookie, just looking for a fresh start at a new station. Steve's friends think they know what's best for him...start dating his new crewmate. Steve thinks they're crazy...or possibly right. But events from James's recent past may pose a threat to any designs they have on each other.

Let Them Eat Cake

   ��                Word Count: 31k                     Rating: Explicit                      Notable Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Pastry Chef!Steve, Sommelier!Bucky                     Warnings: Smut, Drug Use                     Synopsis: Steve picked up the piping bag and returned to the ramekins. Bucky left, though not without shooting one last look at Steve's wide back. Bucky could already tell Steve Rogers was trouble, not even counting the near-religious experiences he inspired among the staff. It wasn’t that Bucky didn’t appreciate him as well; he did. He just tended to appreciate people he found attractive from afar, because explaining the metal arm was hard, and because he didn’t really know how to handle letting someone in close. But that wasn’t why Steve was trouble, not really. Bucky wanted to know why their new pastry chef had gun calluses on his right hand.

Adrenalize Me 

                  Word Count: 58.5k                   Rating: Explicit                    Notable Tags: Vampire!Steve                   Warnings: Smut, Blood                   Synopsis: Leaning against the side of a wall, taking an indolent drag of a cigarette, there he stood. Watching Bucky with an inscrutable gaze. Staring at Bucky for long seconds, the blond seemed to consider him before breaking the silence. “You know, nice guy like you walking alone at this hour – people might think you were looking for trouble.” Trying not to shudder at the sound of that voice, which wrapped around him like smoke, Bucky managed a smirk, lifted a brow. “Well, if I was, it looks like I found it.” Two strangers meet in a dark club. One just happens to be a vampire.

The Change in Us 

                 Word Count: 23.4k                  Rating: Explicit                  Notable Tags: N/A                  Warnings: Smut                  Synopsis: “I’ve found your BFF,” Stark says without preamble. “My… what?” “James Barnes. Winter Soldier. Bucky. I don’t know, I don’t care, but right now he’s perched on the roof of the next building with a gun on me, and it’s not so much my idea of a relaxing afternoon, so could you get down here?” Steve hangs up and starts running.

Things That Go Bump in the Night

                  Word Count: 38.2k                   Rating: Explicit                   Notable Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Ex Army!Bucky                   Warnings: Minor Smut                    Synopsis: Many an odd critter and item have ended up on the front porch of the property Bucky house-sits in the Middle Of Nowhere, but a bleeding blond man is a first. A short inspection reveals the man to be none other than Steve Rogers; ex-Captain America, vigilante, and a wanted fugitive. Steve’s stay of a few days of recovery is prolonged, under instructions for him to lie low until the Avengers can sort out the mess that has become the Sokovia Accords. Bucky is pretty sure that he’s committing an act of treason by providing Steve a place to stay. He is also pretty sure that lengthy interaction with Steve makes one prone to impending headaches and possibly ulcers. And he is certain that he is, very assuredly, in danger of falling in love with Steve.

The Soldier’s Revenge

                 Word Count: 76.4k                  Rating: Explicit                   Notable Tags: Canon Divergence, Enemies To Lovers, Slow Burn                  Warnings: Smut                  Synopsis: Bucky Barnes turns himself in to SHIELD two years after dragging Captain America out of the Potomac River. He was deprogrammed in Wakanda and has been hunting down Hydra ever since, but he needs help if he wants to take proper revenge on his captors. He turns to his old enemies: SHIELD and the Avengers, but it'll take more than a few words to win their trust after the Winter Soldier brought SHIELD to its knees not long before. Now at SHIELD's mercy, the only thing that stands between Bucky and his revenge is the approval of Captain Rogers: a self-righteous asshole that Bucky barely knows.

The Best Way to Wake

                  Word Count: 42.2k                   Rating: Explicit                   Notable Tags: Canon Divergence, Slow Burn                   Warnings: Smut                   Synopsis: James Buchanan Barnes lay in a glass pod in the middle of the table, frozen since he fell. Steve’s hands were on the glass before he realized he’d moved. “Wait, Captain!” “Get him out,” Steve whispered, his hands searching for a clasp, a keypad, something. “Captain, we need to keep him in stasis—“ “I said get him out!” In which Bucky Barnes lay frozen in the Alps for seventy years only to be woken up a year after Steve Rogers was uncovered from the Arctic.

Latte Art and Slow Dancing in the Dark

                    Word Count: 89.5k                     Rating: Explicit                      Notable Tags: Age Difference, CIA!Steve, Barista!Bucky, Sugar                            Daddy!Steve                     Warnings: Smut                     Synopsis: Bucky is a somewhat well-adjusted former army sniper that got his shoulder blown out. He took his discharge and went home to finish school and is working on his international relations masters. His best friends and roommates (Nat & Clint) are CIA agents and tip him off that their local Sbux is hiring. He gets a job there and meets none other than the hottest guy on earth. So how does one get a date in the most top secret government location in the US? What happens when that guy is more than just a hot dorito and wants to give Bucky everything he wants? Bucky is going to have to figure out his shit and fast. That's what's up.

Laughter Lines

                   Word Count: 100.2k                    Rating: Mature                    Notable Tags: Bodyguard!AU, Slow Burn                    Warnings: None                    Synopsis: Bucky Barnes is a rising Hollywood star with a tragic past and a reputation for driving his bodyguards away. Steve Rogers is a veteran with the same tragic past and the need to get back out in the world. The two of them have been estranged since they were teenagers, so when Steve joins SHIELD as a bodyguard, he is less than thrilled when he finds out that Bucky is his first assignment. But how bad can it be? They're both professional adults, right?Wrong.

From Hydra with Love

                   Word Count: 21.2k                    Rating: Mature                    Notable Tags: Spies!Steve and Bucky                    Warnings: Smut                    Synopsis: Captain Steve Rogers is one of the best spies in the world - a marksman, a martial artist, an expert in strategy and tactics. There's not a lot he can't handle. Heck, he's even saved the world once or twice. So why does every run in with the mysterious Winter Soldier leave him feeling like the Bond Girl?

Goddamn Electric

                Word Count: 67.8k                 Rating: Explicit                 Notable Tags: Bodyguard!Steve, Musician!Bucky                 Warnings: Drug Use, Alcohol Use, Smut                 Synopsis: Steve Rogers works for a discreet private security company and gets assigned to James Barnes, a musician who takes the idea of 'sex, drugs & rock 'n roll' just a little too seriously.

There Was Something About Steve Rogers

                Word Count: 46.7k                 Rating: Explicit                 Notable Tags: Post CATWS                 Warnings: Smut, Panic Attacks                 Synopsis: The Winter Soldier knows Steve Rogers has deep feelings for Bucky Barnes, and decides that he can use that to his advantage to gain protection from the Hydra agents still trying to find him. What he didn't bargain for was actually starting to care about the man they call Captain America, or the strength of Bucky Barnes' memories as they begin to resurface.

Through the Mist

                Word Count: 14.5k                 Rating: Teen and Up                 Notable Tags: Soulmate!AU, Post CATWS                 Warnings: None                 Synopsis: He usually kept it covered. Whether it be with long sleeves, a cuff of some sort, or make up Natasha skillfully showed him how to apply. He didn’t cover it up because he was ashamed or because he was one of those people who didn’t like others knowing who his soulmate was- no. He covered it up out of respect. Respect for his fallen partner, and respect for himself because he knew looking at those swoopy lines of James B. Barnes on his wrist always made him crumble like his legs were kicked down. When he crashed into the ice all those years ago he thought he was going to see Bucky again- he thought he was finally going to be with Bucky without people giving them ugly looks and throwing slurs their way. He thought he was going to be happy again.

Take Me Home 

              Word Count: 78.1k               Rating: Mature               Notable Tags: Shrunkyclunks, Veteran!Bucky               Warnings: Smut, Torture, Referenced Suicide               Synopsis: “I’m so sorry, I’m gonna help you I promise, just don’t move, fuck, I ran over Captain America–” the man apologized, over and over, and all Steve managed to say was, “You’re really attractive,” before passing out on the guy’s lap in the middle of the road.

Where the Circle Ends

               Word Count: 29.8k                Rating: Mature                Notable Tags: Zombie Apocalypse!AU                 Warnings: Smut, Gore                Synopsis: In which the world has gone to hell in a zombie apocalypse handbasket and, in the middle of it all, Steve finds the one person he never thought he'd see again. Angst and feelings (amongst other things) ensue.

Our Souls (They Were Made to Last) 

               Word Count: 53.8k                Rating: Mature                Notable Tags: No Powers, Veteran!Steve, Doctor!Bucky, Ghost!Bucky                Warnings: None                Synopsis: Dr. James Barnes is too busy saving lives to actually have one of his own. When he finally agrees to go on a blind date, he gets into an accident that will change his life forever. Retired Army Captain Steve Rogers is depressed, and when he moves into his new apartment he finds it already occupied....with the ghost of its last tenant. To make matters worse, the ghost is adamant that he's not dead. As they navigate their way through their new living arrangements, can they save each other, before it’s too late? Or have they missed their one shot at a happy ending?

By Any Other Name

                 Word Count: 36.9k                  Rating: Explicit                  Notable Tags: Assassins and Hitmen!AU, Spies and Agents!AU                  Warning: Smut                 Synopsis: Steve was a good spy. It turned out one good spy didn't stand a chance against a rival security firm, a contract killer, and his own heart.

[segersgia]

Looking back: Part 1 - Primaris Space Marines - Infantry

The excitement for 9th edition has been growing and growing. People are happy with the upcoming units for Space marines, and Xenos fans are rejoicing at the return of the Silent King and the introduction of new Necron units. 

What I want to do is take a long and hard look at what 8th edition gave us in terms of miniatures. 

To start of this series, we have to begin with Games Workshop’s favorite poster-boys; The Primaris Space Marines

The Primaris debacle:

If you didn’t already know, Games Workshop is somewhat obsessed with Space Marines. This hasn’t changed at all in 8th edition. In fact, it kind of got worse.

8th edition introduced us to the new and improved Primaris Space Marines - Extra cool Space Marines. 

For a lot of people, these were just a lame excuse to resell you an army that most of their costumers had already bought. Lore-wise, they came out of nowhere, and for some they were an affront to what the Imperium stood for: an autocratic, dogmatic and fascist regime that saw innovation and progress as something evil and dangerous. 

Fortunately, the Primaris have begun to become a little more fleshed out, and hopefully, this will continue for the better in 9th edition.

Before I start my overview, I have to explain my main gripe that I have with the ENTIRE range.

The Helmets:

With their redesign, the Space Marines gained a new pattern of Power Armour. This included a new design for their helmets, and I absolutely hate it. Gone is the iconic respirator, and instead we get a return of the Mark IV helmet, A.K.A. my least favorite pattern of the range. 

Kitbashers prove my point. The Mark VII is so much better looking on the new range. They look proper evil and merciless.

So always keep in mind that with every model in this range, I will have the same complaint; I don’t like the design of their helmet.

Intercessors:

The Primaris line was a way for the design team to re-imagine the space marines in a new way. Their size got updated to what might be considered “Tru-scale” and lore-wise, they gained a better crafted kit than their predecessors. Though what they gained in upgrades, they lost in group flexibility. 

Intercessors are equipped with Bolt rifles, which are basically slightly upgraded Boltguns. These can be retrofitted in the usual way with scopes or under-slung grenade launchers. 

Lore-wise, Intercessors take a surprisingly defensive role, mostly described as using suppressive fire to slowly advance to a position or hold the line.  

Their design, specifically their proportions, is what many expected the actual proportions of a space marine to be. They are hulking masses of power armour that should dwarf humans easily. The original Space Marines were a little “ill-proportioned” and the new Primaris have fixed that issue very well. 

One complaint I’ve seen appear is the fact that Intercessors lack the ornateness and religious aspects that the old marines had. If you’d actually compare them with Tactical Marines, it kind of shows that this isn’t the case. 

In fact, it just shows that normal Space Marines aren’t that ornate to begin with. 

Intercessors are a good re-imagining of the Tactical Marines and share the same feel that their predecessors have. What the Intercessors lack is just their weapon options.

7/10

Hellblasters:

The Primaris doctrine seems to hark back to the olden days before the Horus Heresy. Instead of the highly adaptable formations that we see in the Tactical Squads or the Devastator Squads, the Primaris decide instead to have specialized squads.

So while the Intercessors favor trusty bolt weapons, the Hellblasters make use of the the Plasma Incinerator: an improved version of the Plasma Gun that doesn’t overheat unless its fired in its overcharged setting. Hellblasters have the role of providing covering fire, similar to Devastators.  

The Plasma Incinerator is what makes this my favorite unit from the mainline army. It is such an improvement in design over that of the Plasma Gun. It makes for a great silhouette and the miniature looks more powerful because of it.

9/10

Reivers:

Reivers are part of the Vanguard line of Primaris troops; units specifically designed for long covert and stealth operations. 

(The rest of the Vanguard will be looked at in a future post.) 

Reivers themselves act like terror troops; sneaking into combat before yelling “OOGA BOOGA” and murdering everyone in the room like an Eversor Assassin. 

Primaris power armour has a very interesting quirk. It comes in different variants that can be mixed and matched to serve a certain role. Reivers and most of the vanguard line use Phobos Armour; a pattern that is lighter, more lightly armoured and features servos that allow it to be almost silent in combat. It features Grav-Chutes, which allows Reivers to safely descend from heights, similar as to what Elysian Drop-Troopers utilize.

They go into battle with Bolters and over-sized knives. They can also take a Grapling Hook, so they can cosplay as their favourite DC hero. The skull helmet they wear has an in built voice amplifier, allowing their battle chants to turn into a police sound cannon. They basically stole the idea from Eldar Howling Banshees. 

The poses from the “Easy-to-build” kit are just ugly, but their other kit fixes that issue. I still am not sure about the skull helmet, and would’ve preferred a better way to visualize their voice-amplifiers. I kind of like the Phobos pattern, but I do have some gripes with it, such as the exposed metal abs(?) they have. 

6/10

Aggressors:

I really don’t hope this is what will replace Terminators.

Aggressors are a fire support unit that slowly advances while providing covering fire from mid to close range. They wear Gravis Armour, which is the more heavily reinforced variant of the Mark X. They have Power Fists that have either Flamers or Bolters attached to them, and some are equipped with shoulder mounted grenade launchers.

Gravis Armour is my least favourite of the three patterns and Aggressors are my main reason for it. They look very clunky and are way too cluttered with weapons. I don’t like the rounded design as well. It looks like they would take one step and then fall face first into the dirt. Even the artwork doesn’t do them justice and makes their over-sized armaments even more over-sized. A wider belly and smaller gauntlets would’ve fixed this unit’s design.

4/10

Inceptors:

Remember the intro of the Space Marine video game? Captain Titus leaping off a Thunderhawk and flying through an air battle to land on an Ork ship? Inceptors do just that, landing in the thick of the battle, with guns in both hands like B.J. Blazkowicz.

They are equipped with either Plasma Guns or Assault Bolters, and fly through the air with an over-sized jump-pack. To soften their landing, they have these funny looking boot plates, so that they don’t die during the impact.

If the boot plates weren’t a thing, I would have no qualms with this unit. Their version of the Gravis Armour is what I would’ve preferred the Aggressors to have. They also look like they would actually do well in low gravity environments, such as space battles. What I like most about them is the fact that they seemingly resemble Assault Marines from the artwork of Rogue Trader.

Games Workshop has kind of gone back to looking at Rogue Trader, and figuring out how certain aspects of it could fit back into 40k. I’m 100% behind that trend and want more of it.

7/10

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The Primaris range is already massive and I’m separating the range into different parts. So far though, it has been a varied bag of good and meh. I do want to keep these varied, so next up, I’m going to tackle a different army; the Death Guard...