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CONVENIENTLY CLOSE | VI X READER | ARCANE
Synopsis: Seven years have not passed in vain, and the woman in front of you seems to be Vi's sign, but hardened by prison, stronger, taller, eager to live the lost years. And to see you again. Faced with old habits and the need for a place to lay low, Vi takes refuge in your apartment and stays conveniently close, maybe too close.
Contains: arcane!vi, feminine reader, lesbians, lots of arguments and dialogues, nsfw, explicit stuff, arcane universe, childhood friends, romance why not?, SESBIAN LEX
Word count: 6,780
Note: This fic was born from this bot which gave me juicy material to use here, part of the story arises from it, all credits to the creator!
Also, english is not my first language, so I apologize in advance for any mistake in my writing. Enjoy!
It happened in the blink of an eye, the fleeting eye contact, a chill running down your spine as you stopped to look again at who you thought was dead or gone. You paled like a ghost, barely taking a step before her arms were around you, and you let out a gasp.
You barely recognized the woman whose face buried in your neck; the toned arms, the network of tattoos on her arms, the gear on the side of her neck, the pronounced hairstyle and the piercings moved this Vi away from the one you once knew, seven years did not pass in vain and both had changed a lot, but the memories still endured. You wrapped her with doubtful arms, insecure but at the same time overwhelmed by the situation.
Your mind was flooded with memories the moment you dared to inhale the essence of her neck, that sweet aroma hidden behind the sweat and leather of her jacket, the same smell that crept into your nostrils on those afternoons on the couch, practicing boxing together, hiding in the alleys to avoid the poor victims of your pranks full of enthusiasm and malice. Of that last hug that morning, before the paths separated, life changed, Vander died and Zaun sank into chaos commanded by organized crime. Everything had changed but that hug brought you back to sweet adolescence for a few seconds, before you pulled away.
"For God's sake, you're... muscular." you murmured then, looking at the taller woman with attentive eyes.
"Is that a compliment or an insult?" Vi's hands start to roam, finding their way over your shoulders. A smile appeared on her lips, the same thought kept repeating in her mind 'it's her, it's her'.
"It's an statement."
You could barely form a question in the face of such a situation, your childhood friend returning from a seven-year disappearance to stand before you in all her glory, alive, healthy, certainly different but still her nonetheless. At your sudden silence, Vi giggled, patting your shoulder gently. "Long story. don't wanna talk about it just yet."
You nodded, studying the Vi who was once four inches shorter and scar-free, realizing that wherever she was, circumstances had hardened her. “You were in prison,” you said then, not as a question.
“Surprise, surprise,” Vi muttered sarcastically. “I wasn’t dead. And i'll spare you the gritty details, cause I didn't exactly break out. I served my sentence, somehow."
She'd always had a habit of being vague, even during your childhood years. She never answered your questions directly, and she never explained herself when she got into trouble. It frustrated you back then, and it's no different now. "Enough about me. you're gonna have to fill me in. it's been like, what? Seven years?"
"Wait, I-" you had to shake your head and take a breath, cause suddenly having Vi before you wasn't among your plans. You were still at the alley. "Can we... go somewhere else? Grab a drink, talk this out?"
For a moment, she looks like she might refuse. For a moment, you wonder if she'll duck away, the way she always did. But then Vi sighs softly and nods.
"Lead the way, then." she takes a step back, folding her arms behind her neck. "I'm not payin', though.”
Gathering your thoughts and whispering a 'what a night' under your breath, you begin to lead Vi through the backstreets of a Zaun she no longer knows, but you do. Jericho served a wonderful octopus stew, and Vi was able to verify it once again after so many years. You sipped your cocktail, watching the hungry girl in front of you devour the plate, the Zaun market maintained its usual flow of customers and workers, a swarm of smells and sizzling of embers, murmurs, knives and pans to the fire filled the place.
"Now. You better start explaining how did you break out jail." you said.
The question doesn't come as a surprise - Vi had been expecting it. She sighs, and her eyes flutter up to yours, trying to find the words, trying to find the right way to say it. "I didn't break out. I served my sentence." she can see your skepticism, your disbelief, and she adds: "I got parole. Good behavior. That kinda bullshit."
"Good behavior. You?" you scoff.
"Yeah yeah, I was a saint, believe it or not. Guess I had a change of heart, people grow and all that."
"And now you're out and hungry." you comment, watching Vi finish the bowl and let out a hint of a burp.
"You gotta admit, the food behind bars is not so good." Vi grins at you again, her eyes flickering to your drink. "And the drinks either, care to share?"
Vi takes the glass, wrapping the fingers of her free hand around the base. She stares at the liquid for a moment, then her gaze drifts to meet yours, she's thinking, a lot. "Seven years... seven years is a lot of goddamn time. Almost don't recognize ya. What've you been doing all this time?"
"Let's see…" you say, your eyes scanning the market as you gather up seven years of your existence and rank them in order of importance. "I have a job, I'm… an interpreter."
"A what?" she asks, raising a brow.
"I translate, dumbass."
"Oh, right right." Vi giggled. "You work for the pilties, do you?"
"Actually, yes. I get many academic texts to translate."
"Ah, a sneaky rat. No wonder you'd take any job," she snickers. "I'd almost feel betrayed if you said you never went back to your old life of stealing and pickpocketing."
"I realized I couldn't lean on crime forever." you shrug. "Languages fits me better."
Catching up had never felt so necessary. Vi had undergone a true metamorphosis in prison, a wild flower torn from its roots and still able to cling to life with minimal water, in hostile, dry, cold soil. Now she was outside, eager to feel the putrid Zaun air against her skin, no matter how foul-smelling it was, to continue a life that hadn’t even begun yet. Yet it was the means that worried you.
"What's your plan?" you asked after a short moment of silence. "Now that you're out."
"Well, I gotta lay low for a while. They ain't gonna be lookin' for me out in the streets, but that don't mean I should be causin' trouble." her lips pull into a small smirk, as her eyes flicker to you. "Maybe I'll start robbin' the rich and givin' the profits to those in need. Or something like that."
"You'll get yourself in prison all over again." you said, rolling your eyes.
"What, you think I need you to lecture me, mother?" Vi's mocking tone couldn't help but annoy you. Again with that blind confidence and smug smile, hasn't changed one bit.
"Where are you staying?" you asked, sipping your drink which suddenly tasted bitter.
"Don't have a place. Can't exactly go back to my old apartment, for obvious reasons." her expression shifts into a smirk, a gleam of an idea passing her eyes. "Why? You offering a place to crash?"
"Huh, figured out so. You don't have a goddamn place to crash and still you intend to start robbing again?"
"It's not robbing, it's just taking something that some rich snob doesn't even need. Besides, I'll manage, alright?"
The conversation wasn’t going in the direction you expected, a sour feeling settling in your stomach as you recognized an old pattern that the years had accentuated in Vi; her stubbornness. It was one thing to be happy for an old friend who had gotten out of prison, but it was quite another to still believe that crime was a way of life and support that. And you were sick of that shit.
"I gotta go." you said, laying a bill on the table. "I have a paper to submit due tomorrow."
Vi's expression changed to as if she had been slapped. “Hey, I thought we were catching up. Where the hell are you going in such a hurry?”
"I'm happy for you, Vi, but I'm not who I used to be anymore. And neither should you be." you say, your tone so sober that Vi thought you were pulling her leg until she saw you get up from your seat and start walking away. Vi scowls and grabs the bill you left on the table, crumpling it up in her hand.
"Damnit."
Zaun had changed. It was no longer the fragile balance between misery and hope, but an overwhelming network of crime, wrapped in the growing business of Shimmer and prostitution and the certain tacit anarchy that ruled its existence. Vi needed a few days to get used to it, to recognize the city that saw her grow up and find a way to make her way through that melodious chaos. Crime had evolved, the presence of enforcers was increasingly scarce, which gave way to more aggressive, more experienced, more ingenious criminals when it came to benefiting from the few assets of the rest. In Zaun there were no rich people, only the owners of manufacturing factories, who pulled the strings and commanded drug trafficking, who could not be counted on more than one hand's fingers. However, Vi was not going to allow herself to feel strange in the city she called home, not before playing her cards and making her way into the market she knew best apart from crime: fights. With raw confidence and the certainty that seven years of training behind closed doors had given her the skills to hold her own in the ring, Vi went to the Pit and signed up for one of the night's matches. The result? A downcast and barely alive opponent, Vi claimed a spot she didn't intend to give up, and a bag full of coins. She felt right at home.
It took her three days to make a small fortune, yet her name was frequently whispered and attracted unwanted attention, putting her in a position where she had to remain low for a few days. She could keep that up long enough to make a living after seven years in confinement, but to do so she needed the hospitality and goodwill of someone in particular; you. You assumed Vi wouldn't incur in invading your precious privacy, but that wasn't the case. Not when, working on one of your latest translations, in the quiet of your apartment just a couple of blocks from the red-light district, you felt the fleeting passing of a shadow in front of the window and your alarms went off.
She had to admit, you'd picked yourself a nice little spot to settle down in. Vi could have sworn you would have moved to Piltover, after hearing about your choice of profession, but here you were, all cozy in a fancy apartment in Zaun. She couldn't be sure it was exactly safe, but you probably had ways to deal with that. A couple hours of lurking around in the shadows, and she found herself outside of your apartment window, looking in. Vi takes a moment to study the view through the window, observing your movements inside. She should probably announce her presence, but she can't help the little thrill that comes from the thought of spooking you.
Believing herself undetected, Vi stepped into the house while investigating what she thought was your office. A room cradled with an aesthetic chaos of shelves, books and plants, a kitten sleeping by the window, very self-absorbed in his feline dreams to recognize a strange smell in his safe space. But you certainly had better instincts than Pepper.
"Stop there or I'll blow your fucking head." you stated, holding a gun against Vi's head, not even recognizing her in the darkness of the room.
Vi's eyes widen as you suddenly speak, the cold metal of the gun pressing against her skin. She raises both hands in a small surrendering gesture.
"Woah, woah! Easy, doll, it's just me."
You remove the gun from her temple, realizing that it was Vi and not another petty thief. "For god's sake." you grumbled, putting the pistol down and turning the lights on. You were in your pajamas, messy hair and still glasses on from working for hours. "What the hell are you doing by breaking into my place?"
She responds to your question with a dismissive shrug. "I need a place to crash, darling."
"Oh, fuck off." you spat, quickly walking towards the desk to put the gun into the drawer again. Pepper woke up with a hiss, just then realizing a intruder was inside. He bristled. "Why would I? You got yourself in trouble, don't you?"
"Technically not trouble. At least, not yet." she glances down at the hissing ball of fur on the floor, and scowls. "You got a damn cat. Of course you do."
She averts your gaze, shifting awkwardly. "I need a place to crash. at least for the night. My place from... before ain't exactly available to me right now."
You can't help but let out a sarcastic laugh, holding your hands akimbo. "I can't afford to have tenants, you know? Especially not the troublesome ones."
"I ain't a tenant, I'm just asking for a sofa to sleep on for one night. It's not a big deal." insists Vi, her tone softening, just like her eyes. Gosh, no, not that look.
When it comes to Vi, you resistance diminished. It was the years of friendship perhaps, or the fact that this ex-convict with deep eyes and attractive bearing softened something inside you, but to tell her 'no' has been always difficult. Even now.
"Just for tonight?" you asked, as Pepper descended from his pedestal to sniff the boots of this new guest. He didn't liked what he smelled.
"Yeah, just for tonight." she hesitates for a moment, before a small smirk spreads across her face. "Unless you have a queen-size bed that I could fit in instead."
"You'd wish." you grunted.
While you were looking for a blanket for this unplanned guest, Vi studied the room she was in. Apart from the academic chaos that surrounded the desk, the rest of the room was tidy and harmonious. In front of the plum-colored sofa, there was a coffee table, on it a couple of books and a candle, along with what Vi soon recognized as a stash. The candle catches her attention for a moment, and her gaze flicks to the small pipe sitting on the coffee table. Interesting. definitely not the doll I remember.
Behind her, a large shelf stood, next to a series of windows that allowed the moon to sneak in, in addition to Pepper's pedestal, fluffy and scratched. The room was composed of green, purple and orange tones, the string of lights hanging from the ceiling gave it a cozy and calm air.
"Here." you said, handing Vi the blanket.
"Thanks." she mumbles.
"Stay away from my stuff, you hear me? And the booze as well, you drunkie."
A small scoff escaped her lips once you closed the door, and she shifts under the blanket, getting comfortable. She takes a moment, before her gaze drifts over towards Pepper.
"Watcha glaring at, ya little shit." She mutters, the corner of her mouth curving up again.
Vi didn't want to abuse your trust, but she couldn't help but inspect the privacy of your office the next morning. Her desk was really a source of curiosity for her, with that amount of trinkets, sheets, books and notes. The carnivorous plant next to them seemed to be watching her, as if she wanted to bite her finger off if Vi dared to sniff through the drawers. But she was an ex-convict and that was a fucking plant.
Inside the drawers were spread documents and bills, you earned quite well for translation, and many orders came from the science district in Piltover, or failing that, from the shimmer factories in Zaun. You made no distinctions, you just worked. This could not help but annoy Vi a little, working for drug producers was certainly not ethical, but a woman like her had no right to talk about ethics either.
Pepper's hiss took her out of her thoughts, the gray cat looked at her with the disdain and suspicion of a human. As if he knew of her past mistakes, of the fact that she turned to crime from a young age, that she was unable to protect Powder when she needed it most, that as soon as she got out of prison her life seemed to point to repeating the same pattern of crime she had grown up with. But Vi had to be wiser this time, play her cards right, break a cycle she was too accustomed to. She let out a sigh, grabbing her jacket before she left the apartment through the window.
Vi was a silent visitor during the nights, she preferred not to bother you since she knew that her ability to stay on the couch depended on the owner's mood, but you also didn't admit that you were starting to get used to and even wish for the presence of the pink-haired woman at home. First there were brief conversations under the cover of night, then a shared cigarette and an improvised dinner, then it was talking about aspirations and fears. Suddenly Vi felt as close as when you were both fifteen. But mischief no longer appeared as the main act of your interactions, but something else that certainly felt different, an unknown spark that was missing before and that made Vi so pleasant to look at.
Days went by, she came brusied and exhausted from her fights to just crash on the sofa and sleep her pain away. It's been two months with such dynamic and you accepted it.
Vi shifted on the couch, an unusual weight on her stomach saying good morning to her and soon, with sunlight filtering through the curtains, Pepper let out a feline complaint. The cat rested on Vi, naturally comfortable after so many visits from her. Sitting up, Vi studied the room and was surprised to see a lump lying on the desk in front of the couch, you had been up late working again.
“She’s going to work herself to death at this point.” Vi muttered, carefully pushing Pepper off her lap and heading to the desk. Vi knew about the constant commissions that rained down in a never-ending stream of work, but she’d also seen you falling asleep during the day, forgetting to eat, and the dark furrow under your eyes worsening. The woman sighed, gently pushing you off the surface to lift you up with ease, carrying you to your room. You mumbled something along the way, ineligible but akin to a complaint that did nothing but amuse Vi.
As your back hit the soft surface of the bed, your hands sought out Vi’s, pulling her along with you. The woman was initially taken aback by this sudden display of affection, you weren’t one to hug or seek contact, but you looked sick and tired and she couldn’t say no to a person in that condition. She snuggled up to you, running a calloused but gentle hand up your arm, burying her fingers in the strands of your hair. "You really ain't taking care of yourself, cupcake." mumbles Vi, cupping your cheek as her thumb gently stroked your nose.
And at the sight of you, your haggard face against the mattress, the sun streaming through the window and outlining your huddled figure, Vi found a new purpose, someone to protect. And as soon as you fell asleep, she got up, put on her jacket and headed to the only place she knew for sure would allow her to make some quick money.
“Black?” you asked, only a month later, holding the small bottle of black dye as Vi wet her hair in the sink. If Vi understood anything about street fighting, it was that a character was the best way to get the public’s attention, the attention turning into bets and the bets into money. For several weeks now, Violet had been arriving at the apartment late at night, bruised, exhausted and with a small bag of coins in her pocket. “For you, doll” the woman would murmur, barely taking the time to kick off her boots before landing on the couch and falling asleep. At first you thought it was just another risky business Vi was getting into, but after a couple of weeks you realized that the name “Vi” was whispered among the alleys and the market, and that she carried the title of undefeated for more than five matches in a row. She was a champion, no doubt about it, and the beneifts from her profession meant more support for household expenses. Suddenly Vi had become your partner, and all she asked in return was a good talk and for you to heal her wounds. And certainly you would do so.
A smirk crept over her lips at the sight of the bottle resting in your hands. "Yeah, black. I'm sick of standin' out. The pink's too bright." her eyes flick to you again, a mischievous look in them. "You're gonna help me out, right? I don't wanna make a mess of myself while trying to do it alone."
You looked at the little bottle of dye and then at Vi, knowing that once she gets an idea inside her head, nothing can erase it unless she tries it. You sighed. "Sit down," you said at last, reaching for the plastic gloves and the cup in the cabinet.
It took you a good hour, but together, you both managed to dye her long pink hair a dark, natural black. Vi's face had hardened, her scars and freckles seeming to stand out against her dark hair. It was then that, in the face of a silence that spoke volumes, Vi was the one to dare to say the first word. "Gotta say, doll. You did a good job."
"You look like you fell into a pool of oil." you said, clearly disapproving of the new look. Even Pepper, who stepped into the bathroom, hissed at Vi.
"Ah, so even the goddamn cat's against me now, eh?" she asked, making you let out a chuckle. The dye wasn't the only thing that changed Vi's appearance, she left the striped pants and red jacket at home, getting herself tight jeans, ripped at the knees, leather boots, a jacket of the same material, provided with gold studs and the print of a two-headed wolf on the back and covering her bust, bandages wrapped tightly. She looked almost unrecognizable, intimidating. Watching her grab her bag and head for the door that night, you couldn't help but feel anxious and think of the worst case scenarios.
You let out a sharp sigh and spoke up. "Vi, wait. You don't have to keep doing this, y'know? Fighting. I'm sure we can find another way."
Vi frowns at your words, her grip on the doorknob tightening.
"Nah, don't start with that." Her eyes narrow slightly, a touch of defensiveness in her voice. "I've always fought, y'know? it's what I'm good at. I don't know anything else."
"I don't want you to get hurt." you insisted, stepping closer.
"I know how to take care of myself, dollface. I'm not some weak little kid anymore." her voice is a little gruff as she tries to deflect the concern.
"You've never been weak..." you mutter, your expression softening as Vi hovered closer. "But you're not invincible neither."
"Yeah, well, who is invincible?" she takes a step closer, closing the distance between you. her eyes dart across your face, searching for something. "You worry about me too much, cupcake."
"You'd like me to not give a shit about you?" you inquire, looking into Vi's eyes.
she scoffed. "Yeah, i'd like to see you try." her eyes flicker across your face again as her thumb briefly brushes over your chin. A moment of silence passes between you, the room feeling almost charged as the two of you stare at each other intently.
Her proximity was electrifying, the smell of hair dye and grease filling your nostrils, her firm yet gentle hand on your chin preventing you from looking away, your field of vision dominated by her, by her light blue eyes, her scar on her upper lip and eyebrow, her straight eyebrows, her messy makeup, her dark lips. "I couldn't stop worrying, Vi. Even if I tried to." you whisper at last.
"Yeah, probably." she mutters, her voice a hoarse whisper. You let out a gasp as Vi leaned in to kiss you, a simple, almost shy kiss, but capable of wreaking such havoc on your insides that your heart began to pound.
She captures your mouth in a gentle kiss, her lips moving against yours slowly, almost tentatively, as if she was testing the waters. When you gasp in response, she deepens the kiss, her hand on your face moving to cradle the back of your head, fingers tangling in your hair. Her other hand moves to rest on your hip, pulling you a little closer as you feel your skin burning with an unexpected thrill. But you find yourself pulling back, a hand against Vi's chest.
"No." you whisper, exasparated, overwhelmed, as Vi's breath brushes your lips.
"No?" she repeats, her voice cracking slightly. Her hand remains tangled in your hair, the other still lingering on your hip, its grip having tightened. "You don't want me to keep going?"
"We shouldn't..." you weakly whisper. It wasn't just the kiss, it was about kissing a woman, and that woman being your lifelong friend. How much were you risking by crossing that line and delving into the taste of her lips and the firmness of her hands? God, you could barely explain it to yourself.
She pauses at your words, her grip on your hip loosening as she processes the conflicted look in your eyes. Her gaze drifts across your face, taking in every detail, as if trying to read your thoughts.
"Y'know..." a brief silence stretches between you, the only sound being the faint hum of the city outside the window. "We can stop... if you want."
Her hand slowly falls from your hip, and she takes a measured breath as she steps back, putting a short distance between the two of you.
You feel her slip away from you, backing away as a look of disappointment settles on her face and the glow of desire fades. You swallow. "I've never kissed a girl." you suddenly confess.
She runs a hand through her dark hair, visibly processing this new information. There's a moment of tense silence before she speaks again, letting out a huff. "I figured out so."
Your eyes widened, watching Vi taking a step back towards the door. "I should get going, there's a match I have to win." she says, leaving the apartment, leaving you confused, almost upset.
During Vi's absence, you couldn't find anything to distract you. As soon as you sat down for a moment to rest after feeding Pepper, tidying the living room, doing the laundry, heating up dinner or taking a shower, the touch of her lips flooded your senses and produced an almost unknown tingle in your belly. The smell of her skin, the gentleness with which her hand settled on your hip and pulled you against her. You couldn't stop replaying the scene, with some uncertainty if you were allowed to think that way about a childhood friend, or a woman. You only found some peace once you fell asleep that night, in the wee hours of the morning you felt an extra weight on the bed with you, an arm around your waist and an "I'm home, cupcake."
The next morning, you found the space next to you empty. You assumed Vi had fallen asleep on the couch, but her boots beside the bed and her jacket on your dresser said otherwise. You got up, hearing Pepper meowing in hunger from the kitchen. You barely noticed the overflowing bag of money on the coffee table or the sound of the shower running, only sleepwalking into the kitchen to feed the hungry cat. With the animal crouched before its bowl, you poured yourself a glass of water and only then turned back to the coffee table. “I told you I had a fight to win,” Vi said from behind you, watching you count the coins and bills in shock. The woman stood by the door, her hair still damp and a not-so-disguisable cut across the bridge of her nose, eyebrow, and cheek. “This is a bunch of money.” you muttered, studying the woman before you.
"Bets paid good last night." she nonchalantly replied, coming closer as she ignored the money. You were the center of her attention then, you and your robe. "I want you to take a break, alright? From your job."
"A break?" you asked, Vi's sincere smile speaking volumes.
"Yeah, for a while." she reached out to brush a stray lock of hair behind your ear, her touch surprisingly gentle. "You work too much."
Your expression softened, noticing the sweet gentleness which Vi treated you, how tender her eyes were at that moment. You couldn't help but lean against her touch. "About last night..."
Her hand cups your chin, her thumb gently grazing over your bottom lip. "You don't regret it, do you?" her voice is hoarse and low. Beneath her confident façade, there’s a hint of vulnerability in her eyes, a subtle fear that you’ll reject her.
"No." despite the inner turmoil, you couldn't regret it, not when you wanted more.
Relief flickers across her face, and that cocky smirk returns to her lips. "Good." her hand cups the side of your face, fingers lightly brushing across your skin, and she leans in to whisper against your lips. "Cause I’m gonna kiss you again."
This time it wasn't a fearful kiss, but deep and ambitious from the first moment, Vi pulling you against her and wrapping her lips around yours with a soft moan that only served to ignite a timid flame of desire that now sought to become a fire. You closed your eyes and dared to hold her cheek, testing a terrain unknown to you but dominated by her. She wanted to be gentle with you, to ease you into this new terrain, but her desire for you overpowered her self-restraint and the kiss quickly turned hungry and greedy.
"Please, just..." she whispered against your lips, a hand sneaking underneath your robe to grasp your waist. "Let's sit down."
Vi landed on the couch, pulling you closer until you were straddling her, taking possession of the back of your neck to pull you into another kiss. You moaned against her lips, savoring every sensation as if it were a dish you’d never tried before but surprisingly tasted delightful and addictive. Vi smelled like shampoo, her lips were soft and her hands were calloused but gentle. One of them ran down your spine over your robe, and you stepped back to quickly remove it.
She kissed your neck, running gentle palms up the expanse of your neck and chest, shyly cupping one of your breasts before you pulled away to look at her. She understood the approval in your eyes, bringing her hands behind your thighs to hoist your hips so your chest faced her. You let out a sigh at the wetness of her mouth enveloping your nipple, a gentle, tentative suck that made you clench in a new way. “Fuck…” you moaned, at the same time as their hands massaged your buttocks and dared to slap them.
"I was waiting for you to start swearing." she whispered against your tits, one of her hands running along your spine before you felt the urge for more.
Your ass landed again, this time Vi’s knee between your legs as she kissed you again. You wanted more, you wanted to know what else could be offered by a woman whose experiences had hardened her character but were unable to sour her kisses and moans. Vi still had so much love to offer, and you knew she loved you, every action, every look said it. The way she made you breakfast while you dealt with endless loads of work at your desk said it, her banal conversations that sought to lift your spirits said it, her hands holding you as if you were physically a necessity said it, the bags of money resting on the table said it, and her bruises from brutal fights where her main motivation was you, said it. Vi always loved you, but it was only a matter of time before you realized it was a romantic affection, not a friendly one.
You were exasperated, your hips rocking as Vi pressed her knee into your core, a delicious friction that produced a pleasant, addictive tingle, your wetness speaking for itself. Vi gripped your waist tightly, setting the pace, watching you with attentive eyes and parted lips. You found yourself moaning against her lips, kissing her in fits and starts before you had to pull back for more. "You're so pretty." she whispered.
You leaned in for another kiss, before your hands went down to pull Vi's top off. The contrast was clear, Vi standing out for her muscles and roughness, the network of tattoos on her arms and back capturing your attention for a moment before you ran a hand over her chest. Discreet glances spoke, and the moans that indicated something was going (very) right. Vi patted your thigh before you withdrew from her lap, sliding your panties down gently as she placed a trail of kisses from your hip to your knee.
You felt self-conscious, Vi’s gaze seemed to take in every last detail of your body, from the bones of your hips, to your navel, to the pubic hair that covered your crotch. But your insecurity had no place in the eyes of a woman who simply wanted you for being you. “Don’t give me that look, you’re gorgeous.” She smiled, her hand settling between your legs as she probed your wetness. “Shh… just checking.” She whispered, her thumb gently circling your clit. “Does that feel good?”
"Yes..." you moaned, the suggestive wet noises making you shiver. "Really good." you spread your legs wider, giving Vi the consent to continue further.
You lifted one knee onto the couch as a finger gently entered and curled towards the nearest wall of your insides, giving you a sweet tickle. Vi studied your expressions, the way your breathing quickened and your hands rested on her shoulders for support.
"You're so soft..." she murmured, her own breathing labored as she continued to watch your expressions closely, seeking any sign of discomfort. "Tell me if it hurts." her free hand lightly stroked your thigh, a gesture of reassurance while she checked on you constantly, realizing your reaction came from sole pleasure and not pain at all. Soon enough she eased a second finger and a sigh escaped her lips as she felt you clenching around her.
"That's it..." she muttered against your mouth as she leaned in to kiss you, her fingers slowly working in and out of you. Her touch was gentle but firm, as if she was being careful not to hurt you.
Your knees threatened to buckle, the constant motion inside you awakened nerve endings you thought were inert, Vi’s ears searching to pick up your every grunt and moan. Her breathing quickened, before she let out a hiss and pulled her fingers away. A quiet whine escaped your lips and she took a moment to catch her breath. "Sorry... just a sec..."
Vi stood up from the couch, cupping the back of your neck to give you another kiss before gently motioning for you to lie down. "Lay back for me, cupcake." she whispered, finding a way between your legs as she trailed a way of kisses from your chest to your groin. There was a certain urgency to Vi's movements, a desire that made her breathing quicken and her fingers squeeze the flesh of your thighs as she parted them, skipping the main course in favor of running her tongue along the inside of your thighs, placing brief kisses and bites that allowed the blood to flow to your core, awakening your muscles, making you desperate for relief.
"Please."
"Shh, I've got you." she whispered against your skin, her voice a low and sultry rumble, her fingers tracing lazy circles on your inner thighs. "Patience."
You leaned your head back, eyes closing at the wet feel of her tongue as it ran up and down your core. She kept one hand firmly on your hip, the other on your thigh as she kept it apart. You moaned, looking down into a pair of lustful, delighted eyes, her mouth covering your folds, sucking and alternating with the tip of her tongue. Watching you, studying your pleasure, relishing on your sweet whimpers. “Fuck.” You moaned, your hips bucking slightly in search of more contact.
Vi's tongue worked you slowly and deliberately, mapping every inch of your core with a mixture of delicacy and desire. She released your hip and brought her hand up to your chest, her fingers finding your nipple and giving it a firm pinch. "That's it, just feel it..."
Her hand kneaded your breast as her tongue circled your clit, unashamed to make wet, suggestive sounds, to moan against your folds and to stop and look at you from time to time. She smiled, you looked splendid, needy but at the same time pleased, your cheeks slightly rosy, your lips parted, letting out moans and light gasps.
"Breathe, cupcake. I wouldn't want you to hyperventilate," she said mischievously, sticking her tongue out to deliver a long lick along the length of your core.
"Easy for you to say..." you panted, trying to catch your breath. Your mind was spinning, your body aching and desperate. But Vi had something else in mind, a way to drive you to the edge.
“Take a breath.” she whispered, pulling her mouth from between your legs to settle on her knees. “Look at me.” Vi caressed your thighs and moistened her ring and middle fingers with her mouth as you forced yourself to inhale and not exhale gasps of anticipation. Suddenly you felt her hand cup your chin, pulling you in for a kiss. You rested on your forearms behind your back as she inserted both of your fingers, twisting them in a specific motion that managed to draw a muffled whimper from you. It was sparkling, sweet, precise, and in the perfect spot. "Goddamn..." you whined.
"I know." Vi chuckled, kissing you again as the throes of an orgasm built in your lower belly and made your legs tense. "I know, pretty."
You reached a point where your thoughts were cut off, each and every one of them about Vi, her lips against yours, her fingers inside, curling and keeping a steady rhythm that did nothing but lead you down the right path to orgasm. You moaned into her mouth, pulling away to breathe once an electric wave shook every fiber of your body and your legs locked in an involuntary spasm. Vi rested her forehead against your chest, placing soft kisses as your arms cradled her head, yearning to be close to the person who was able to make you come so hard. Vi smiled, studying the way the pleasure settled into your muscles and your arms slackened.
"Good, babe, good..." she whispered, taking a look of your teary eyes before you pulled her to kiss her deeply.
You stared at the ceiling, the sun streaming through the window as your hands ran through Vi’s thick hair. You missed the pink, the dull black hardened her face too much. The boxer sighed, also processing the fact that she had just had sex with you and it had been wonderful from start to finish. This peace was new, it wasn’t temporary or fragile, it was latent, substantial, tangible. It was as if Vi had spent twenty-three years of her life searching for the calm that only lying on your chest gave her, and she couldn’t help but feel genuinely happy and satisfied. This is what life is about, not just surviving, but breaking down defenses and forgetting for a moment about being the strong one. You kissed her crown, Pepper climbed on the sofa and curled up between your feet and Vi's, purring calmly, like a lullaby.
"Looks like Pepper has finally accepted you." you whispered, making Vi lift her face.
"It was damn time. Just like her mom, stubborn as hell." she agreed, looking at the cat briefly before she nuzzled against your chest again. "He better get used to it, cause I ain't leaving your side anytime soon."
#vi arcane x reader#arcane vi#vi arcane#arcane smut#arcane x reader#violet arcane#vi arcane x y/n#vi arcane x you#vi smut#league of legends vi#arcane fanfic#vi fanart#vi art#vi x caitlyn#arcane x you#vi x fem reader#vi x reader smut#vi x you#vi x reader#vi x y/n#vi x oc#wlw#arcane#league of legends#fic#lesbians#romance#arcane fic#arcane imagines#arcane s2
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Comfortable
Captain Marvel was a wonderful guy, friendly, caring, loyal to a fault and always cheery
Everyone loved him or at least respected him
The Justice League especially
So it's not a surprise when the Captain hasn't answered their calls and messages for a few days, they decided to visit him in his home city, Fawcett
Fawcett is a nice city, weird as hell and concerning at times but it had its own beauty
So in all honestly no one was shocked when a big piece of metal came hurling at the league the very second they stepped a foot in the borders of the city
Clark didn't have a chance to take off the ground before a woman in a silver helmet caught it, beside the helmet from which they could see her long Brown hair, she wore a red shirt, a blue belt, and gloves boots and a yellow bottom of a bodysuit that showed off her legs
She putted the piece of metal down on the ground and landed in front of them
“Hello, I’m Bulletgirl” the woman- Bulletgirl extended her hand for a handshake and Diana, who was the closest to her, accepted it
“Nice to meet another sister in arms, I’m Wonder Woman and this” she gestured at her friends “is the Justice League”
“Oh the Justice League, we heard so much about you” Bulletgirl smiled brightly “it's so nice to finally meet you properly, I apologise for the welcome you got but we’ve been having a bit of a problem for the last few day”
“Which includes flying pieces of metal?” Barry cocked his eyebrow, not that she could see
Bulletgirl didn't say anything, just pointed behind her
There was a gigantic robot walking through the city, it seemed to try and swat away whatever was flying around it, probably Captain
“Yeesh” that was Hal
“Yeah, Dr Sivanna started wreaking havoc in that robot a few days ago and we're trying to get him out without damaging the city and hurting people” Bulletgirl rubbed the back of her neck “we’re herding him to a less populated area and evacuating people from there to lessen the risks of anything happening”
Before anyone from the league could say anything, red blurr hitted the ground in front of them
“Ugh” the blur turned out the be a man
“Hi sweetheart” Bulletgirl waved at the man who was apparently her love “i see your ‘i can handle it’ is doing well”
“Oh yeah kick the lying one” the man managed to sit up with a grunt, he was wearing the same helmet as Bulletgirl
“I have the honor to introducing my dunce of a husband Bulletman” the woman said as she helped her husband stand up, his costume was very similar to his wifes, the only difference really were pants and a lack of gloves
“Nice to meet you” he turned to Bulletgirl “Do you have to call me that?” Bulletman grimaced a which made his wife laugh and kiss his cheek
“Now don't be dramatic dear i've called you far worse”
“True” Bulletman shrugged and dusted his clothes off “so, you're the infamous Justice League we’ve been hearing so much about”
“That's us” Clark smiled
“You do look like a bunch of well meaning people, even that shadow guy over there” he pointed at Bruce “dressed in black, cowl, long cape, gloomy demeanor, you must be Batman”
Batman just grunted in acknowledgament
“How are things going back there?” Bulletgirl asked her husband
“Oh, Voltage and Mary are evacuating people from a neighbourhood that Captain, Mr Scarlet and Ibis are herding Sivanna to”
“That's good” She patted his shoulder and turned back to the Justice League “so what brings you to Fawcett anyways?”
“Oh” Barry perked up “we wanted to see how Cap is doing since he hasn't been answering his comms for the past few days but we see why”
“Yeah” there was a silence for a moment “sooooo, do you guys want to help us out with that?”
Everyone agreed
Clark flew over to where the machine was and created a makeshift corridor from ice
Hal started herding the robot with his projections alongside Captain Marvel who waved at him and a man in a red turban
Shayera, Bulletgirl and Bulletman were flying around the robots head to try and confuse Sivana and IT seemed to work
Sivanas machine was slowly stepped towards a big, circular housing estate while Barry was quickly evacuating the last of civilians from the dangered area
When he was finally in a right position, Diana wrapped her lasso around the robots legs, Bruce did the same with his grappling hook
Shayera, Hal and Bullegirl started pushing at the shoulders of the robot while Captain Marvel and Bulletman were pulling them
The robot lost its footing and started to lose its balance. Clark made a giant ice wall to cushion the fall
The machines upper body fell on the ice and shattered it to about a half of it's height before stopping (Barry made sure to catch and put away the pieces of ice, before any of them landed on any building)
Bulletgirl opened the hatch of the machines head and took Sivana out, holding him by the scruff of his kilt while he was kicking and screaming, flailing his arms around
“I’ll take him to the police, Mister Scarlet is already with them making sure that there aren't any any injured or god forbid casualties” Bulletgirl said as she flew away from Sivana in her hand
The rest of the two groups gathered on the ground by the robot
“That was awesome guys” Barry smiled as he joined the group
“It sure was” Bulletman nodded his hand and putted his hands on his hips, seconds before he got tackled and putted in a one arm headlock by Marvel
“You guys were great!” Captain smiled in his typical fashion as he held the Bulletman
The man didn't seem too bothered by his current situation
“Do you have to do that every time?” The man in a red turban asked, tilting his head a bit
“You know I do, Ibis” Marvel grinned at the man, Ibis apparently “you guys were great too” Captain directed his attention to them, completely shifting his attitude
Before any of the League members could say anything else they got interrupted by two blurs, red and blue, flying straight into the Captain
The man didn't budge and just caught the two into his other arm
The red blur was a girl, looked almost identical to Captain, Mary Marvel
The blue blur was a guy, Voltage
Captain didn't say anything, just dropped them as they kept laughing and cheering
“Alright Cap, I think it's time for you to let go of Bulletman” Mr Scarlet said, leaning a bit on Ibis
Marvel sticked his tongue out at Mr Scarlet and eased his arm, letting the other man slip out of his grasp
Bulletman took advantage of his freedom and slapped Captain in the arm. Captain was about to slap back when Bulletgirl landed next to them
“Alright, Sivana is taken care of” she dusted her hands off and looked at the mess
“Yeah this is going to be a bitch to clean up” Ibis sighed
“Yeah, how about you guys start and I’ll escort our guests” Bulletgirl smiled
“Yeah yeah, you do you” Voltage rolled his eyes as he was already starting the clean-up
Bulletgirl motioned to the league to follow her, and they did
“Did Captain Marvel seem, different to you guys?” Clark his friends in a shushed voice as they walked trough the streets of the city
“He did seem much more relaxed around the other guys” Barry rubbed his chin
“He also called them by their names, without all these “Misses” and “Misters” he always uses when addressing one of us” Shayera pointed out
“Hmm” Bruce hummed, thinking
They arrived at the city borders and stopped in front of Bulletgirl
“It was really nice meeting all of you and thank you for your help” she smiled at them brightly
“It was nice meeting you and your friends too” Clark smiled back
“Uhh” Hal interjected “I got a question, you see, Captain Marvel seemed much more relaxed around you guys, how did you get him to let loose?”
Bulletgirl stared at Hal for a few moments
“Is he overly polite with you, is always respectful and seems like he would rather die than be mean to any of you?”
The League was left dumbfounded for a few seconds
“Uhh yeah” Barry nodded “how did you know?”
“Because he was the exact same way with us when he started out as a hero of Fawcett” Bulletgirl explained
“There is no way that's true” Hal shook his head
“Oh but it is, it took him about five years to finally let loose, you gotta give him some time. How long has he worked with you?”
“About a year and a half now” Diana answered
“Oh yeah, it’s much too soon for him” Bulletgirl laughed
“Maybe he does need time to get comfortable” Diana rubbed the back of her neck “how long have you been working together”
“Oh we’ve been fighting together since 1960”
“1960!?” Barrys eyes bulged out, same as the rest of the League really
“What do you mean 1960?” Clark asked in shock, he wasn't even on earth in 1960, he doubted that he was even in plans during that time
“Not to sound rude or anything but how old are you?” Hal asked
“Oh i’m 35” she answered, as if she’s not frying the justice leagues brains
“Wait, wait, wait” Shayera shook her head “ if you've been working with Cap since 1960, then how are you still 35?”
“That's because of the Suspendium” Bulletgirl said as if it explained anything. She must have noticed their confusion since she started talking again “Dr Sivana used a chemical he created, Suspendium, to trap Captain Marvel, Mary Marvel and Voltage in a force Field that would keep them suspended animation, something went wrong and instead of just capturing the three, the entire city got surrounded by the time bubble, as we call it, with Sivana in it. Captain managed to pop the bubble two years ago”
“Two years ago was when there were first sighting of Captain Marvel” Bruce pointed out
“Yes, the second the bubble popped, Captain started flying around the world”
“Wait” Clark shook his head “how come we never heard of something like that ever happening?”
“Oh” Bulletgirl rubbed the back of her neck “apparently everything and everyone that was trapped in the time bubble was completely erased from the maps and history books and only came back when the bubble was popped”
“That doesn't make any sense” Bruce sighed as he rubbed his temples
“Nothing makes sense, bat boy” Bulletgirl shrugged “now, as much as it's nice standing here and talking I really should help with cleaning” She said as she took of from the ground and bid them adieu
“God this is so weird” Barry sighed
“You're telling me?” Clark slumped a bit
“I think it's best if we don't think about it too much” Diana patted her friends shoulders
As they came back to the Watchtower they all agreed not to think too much about the whole Suspendium situation, it would only lead to a headache
They do like Captains friends tho, they seem nice and are good heroes
@puppetwoman17 @shazam-secret-santa
I hope you like it :D
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salt lake crew made a private party for christmas, they (abby) invited you . . . ૮ ˶´ ᵕˋ ˶ა
you arrived in the middle of the year, rescued during an exclusive salt lake crew patrol that ended up escalating too quickly. it took you a while to adapt to the stadium, but you never stopped doing what was asked of you.
and someone didn't fail to notice this effort.
“ abby! ” manny shouts.
“ huh? ” she turns to him.
“ we need to get the decorations, what are you doing? ” he follows abby’s gaze.
she was looking at you, patiently cleaning the dishes in the refectory kitchen.
“ we should invite her. ”
he takes two steps back.
“ abigail, are you serious? mel already got mad that i wanted to invite my… uh, nevermind. you can try but don’t come crying to me after this, let’s go! ”
both go out to get the christmas decorations they had prepared for the party at the aquarium. as they walked, mel and owen appeared in their field of vision.
“ mel, found you! ” abby shouted. “ are you going to the kitchen?! ”
“ wow! yeah, calm down. i need to make the hot chocolate and finish the decoration of the cookies. ”
“ amazing! owen, help him! ”
the blonde escapes from the manny(ual) labor to start using her charms.
“ can we talk…? ”
“ you’re already speaking. ”
abby tries to match the velocity of mel's steps.
“ i was wondering if we could bring someone else to the party…? ”
“ not you too?! manny already tried to invite his gorgeous situationship and i— ”
“ it’s the girl we rescued. ”
“ oh! ” mel stops walking abruptly. “ cute pie? awwww of course we can invite her. ”
abby stops more confused.
“ i’m sorry? cute pie? ”
“ yeah! this girl is a living blessing. i can't think of another name as dedicated to diverse tasks as her. isaac kinda noticed her too, you know? he says we can’t let her in patrol as long as she wants, this stadium can’t loose her. ”
“ and how was i not aware that isaac talked about her…? ”
“ since you mentioned it, i've found you very airy since october, it seems like you're living in your own head. what happened? ”
“ is making the cookies already driving you crazy? be careful with the sugar, diabetic. ”
the blonde tries to change the topic by saying that and rushing to the kitchen.
“ hey… ahm, hi. do you need help? ”
you look at her, noticing the awkward behavior.
“ hi abby! no need, i’m already finishing. ”
mel arrives and says hi to you with a bright smile.
“ are you free today sweetie? ”
“ uhum, finished everything in the refectory. ”
“ great, abby wants to tell you something. ”
mel says, and walks away to make hot chocolate. you look at her with curious eyes, standing in a classy and relaxed position.
“ you know, since we rescued you, i mean… we are very glad to have you with us, specially me and the others… of course the rest of the stadium too but— ”
you wait patiently and a slight smile appears in your face. it’s kinda funny to see abby, this tough and big figure, for some reason all nervous while taking with you.
“ i want to invite you to our private party. that’s it, mel agreed too, and i think you don’t deserve to celebrate your first christmas here alone. not that the others would not include you! i mean— ”
“ yes! ” you chuckle looking at mel, she is smiling too. “ that’s so sweet of you… really, i appreciate that you’re thinking about me too. do i have to bring something? ”
“ NO! no! never… ” she shouts. “ sorry. i’m stressed about the organization. but no, you’re our special guest, you just have to be there and enjoy everything! ”
she quickly looks at mel, who was moving quickly around the kitchen.
“ sweetie, why don’t you go get ready? i will knock at your door when the party starts. ”
“ uhum! see y’all later! ”
you leave the kitchen not too bouncy like a rabbit, and calm like a cat.
“ you’re a disaster, abby anderson! ” mel bursts into laugh. “ i think i got all the answers i needed. ”
“ what do you mean?! ”
“ nothing! ” she chuckles. “ when the time comes, you will pick her at her door. don’t question it. go help the others, i want some time alone to make everything here. ”
mel can be scary and sullen at times, but she almost feels like someone watching a teen movie seeing the other younger members of the salt lake crew fall in love.
abby leaves the kitchen speechless.
“ this face… she didn’t let you, doesn’t she? ”
“ shut up manny… i invited her. ”
“ who? ” owen asks.
“ the girl we rescued months ago, abs seems addicted. ”
“ shut up! oh my goodness! how’s the decorations going after all?! ”
manny and owen share grin and a look.
“ it’s almost done, i already told the others to get ready. mel just have to bring the food and we can start. ”
they finish decorating the aquarium, finally! it's adorable: all the fake branches of leaves, the lights that never stop flashing, some carved reindeer and a christmas tree right in the center of the principal room. abby returns to her room and starts to get ready, some uncertainties appear.
should i do a better braid?
it’s already perfect.
what if i’m stinky and only i can’t notice?
her smell is like pine trees with a touch of cinnamon, thanks to her cologne and the perfum that she found in one of the patrols.
there was nothing wrong, actually.
abby was just nervous to talk to you more then five sentences.
and speaking of you…
you were doing the final steps of your makeup when door knocks can be heard.
“ i’m so sorry! mel mad— ”
abby pauses her speaking, and for a reason. in your months on the stadium, it’s the first time you put on a tight dress to go out.
“ nora found this one weeks ago, i just washed and it’s pretty to use again… ”
you notice the clearly smile, abby was genuine enchanted by you. her eyes were sparkling like snowflakes falling down.
“ you’re gorgeous… ” you blush hard.
“ thank you, abs! ”
abs…
SHE CALLED ME ABS !!!
“ you look gorgeous as always. ”
she notices your shaky hands and the way you were avoiding her gaze.
“ about mel, you were saying… ”
“ ah, right. she had to stay into the kitchen a little more, buts everything’s okay! ”
she pauses for a moment.
“ it’s pretty cold outside, they’re waiting for us in the drivers anyway but take this— ”
“ you’re too kind, the aquarium isn’t that fair. ”
“ hey! i insist, i don’t want you to get a cold. ”
she puts her jacket around you.
“ so cute. ” she says. “ i mean, you’re cute of course! but mor— ”
“ abigail anderson! ” leah shouts from the end of the corridor. “ you’re a fucking snail, let’s fucking go! ”
abby and you share a look giggling, and you two walk with leah to the driver in a awkward silence. everyone finally arrives the aquarium. mel already told everyone that you would be there and they’re being kind to you. as always.
“ hey, you hungry? ” you nod negativly. “ great, wanna see something cool? ”
you agree, abby asks you to close your eyes and she guides you to somewhere else in the aquarium you’ve never been before.
“ you can open. ”
it’s a secret little room, with candles, a mat all rounded with cushions. and a big window opened to the water. yeah, there’s life swimming there too.
“ sit down, please. ”
“ abby… you made this? ”
“ yes, i mean— manny and owen helped me some hours ago. can i… hold your hand? ”
if you remember, that’s literally the first time you’re touching abby. you two never had the opportunity to hug or anything else before.
“ oh, you’re warm! ” she chuckles.
“ and you’re kinda cold… are you okay? ” you ask genuinely concerned, abby’s just nervous.
“ i feel better now. i want to tell you something… you can slap my face and run away if you want, you’re in your rights. ”
pause.
“ since when we found you, all scared, hurt and hiding from the infecteds… i couldn’t stop thinking about you. when i saw your figure all fragile and hopeless like that, i felt a deep feeling to be the one protecting you. and when i noticed everyone being kind and respectful with you just in your first day here, i noticed something. your soul is the most pure thing ever… i don’t wanna sound like a stalker, but i was noticing you in everything you offered yourself to do! you’re perfect, and just in this month, the last of the year, i noticed that i’m genuinely falling in love. ”
what would you answer to that be? :D
#lesbian#lesbians#wlw#wlw love#wlw post#abby anderson x reader#abby x fem!reader#abby anderson x you#abby headcanon#abby headcanons#abby the last of us#abby tlou#abby tlou2#abby anderson x chubby reader#abby anderson x y/n#abby anderson x black reader#abby anderson x female reader#abby anderson#abigail anderson#abby x masc!reader#abby x y/n#abby x you#abby x reader#tlou part 2#tlou2#abby anderson tlou2#lesbians headcanons#lesbian headcanon#wlw community#sapphic
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Sevika x fem!bar owner!reader
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a/n: sorry this took so long lmao. I completely scrapped the first version i wrote of this because it just got too damn long
regardless, we're here now and i hope you enjoy!!
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"So… what is it exactly that you do?"
You'd asked her the question on yet another night where she'd stayed extra late, long after the last patrons had bid you a good night (or very early morning) and all the chairs had gone up.
(Sevika had put them up, even after you'd distinctly told her not to before you went into the kitchen. Your fault, really)
She ponders the question, wondering if you're playing at something more or really just asking. She knows you're smart. It's why she likes you. But she just doesn't know how smart.
"I hurt people, usually," she said casually. If the answer offended you, you displayed the opposite of it.
Your glasses clinking was the only sound to clash with the jukebox, ringing in a gentle sense of understanding on your part.
"A lucrative business here," you say.
"In the long-term. Better be, at least."
For someone who's known as The Lioness of the Lanes, it's a while before you ever see her lion'ing about or whatnot.
She's never violent in your establishment. But you know bad people, you know how to pick up someone's capacity for violence. Sevika has a huge one.
But you understand quickly that there's a reason she's called 'Lioness' and not 'hyena', or something. Her violence is never undue. If she bares her teeth, it's to protect.
Physical altercations aren't at all uncommon in your bar. It's the Undercity after all, these things happen but people always move on from it quickly.
You've noticed that people always seem to... "act right" whenever Sevika's at your bar that night. The meanest-looking men in your bar straighten their posture when she walks by their table, others greeting her with a nod of respect (or submission).
"Wow. I'm glad you like me, at least," you say as she sits down, right in front of you like always.
"Says who?" And she always gives that smug little smile when you laugh in response.
While she's watched/admired you put more than one customer on their ass for trying to cause a scene in your establishment, it's always with a protective posture.
She goes into guard dog mode the moment you cross out from behind the protection of your bar to tell a drunkard off. Her poker buddies poke fun at her for it.
She intervenes before you even get the chance to one time. Perhaps it's because the man keeps drunkenly bumping into her shoulder, or because his boisterous voice keeps causing her head to snap over to him.
You're busy laughing at her expense when the man turns his antics on you. You're perfectly content to brush off whatever rudeness he spouts at you, but Sevika clearly isn't when her hand shoots out and grabs the back of his neck.
He'd called you a dumbass or something of the sort in a more distasteful manner when you'd cut him off. Sevika's eyes had flared with a personal, wrathful anger before she'd grabbed him by the scruff.
"You know better," she snaps. It would be as if she were lecturing a child if it weren't for the man's face pressed against the bar. She's pressing him into the surface with nothing but the strength of her human arm, her large body looming over his as he slurs out an apology.
God, you wished she would grab you like that- who said that??
The next time she comes in, you insist her whiskey's on the house.
"Consider it compensation for dealing with that guy last night." She rolls her eyes at you as she lights her cigarillo on the lighter you offer, and throws a few bills on the bartop anyway (hot).
You throw them back at her with a playful glare, and subsequently earn yourself a real one. You feel a shiver run down your spine that's for any reason but fear.
"Don't play this game with me, you'll lose." To you, that really didn't sound all that bad.
Before you can even think, she's leaning forward and tucking the bills into the pocket of your apron in the middle of your sternum. The look she wears is challenging as she sits back, almost expectant of a reaction.
You don't disappoint, reaching out with two fingers to pluck the cigarillo from her lips and taking your own drag. Your eyes never leave hers, watching her shamelessly stare at that damn cigarillo with a burning jealousy.
"Hm. I picked a good brand, didn't I?" "Yeah, yeah, hand it back before you choke, princess."
You try not to let it get to your head (and heart) how it makes you feel when she calls you that, or any other name like 'baby', 'sweetheart', or 'beautiful'.
And you try not to let it get to your head how you seem to be the only one here who she calls those things.
Neither of you had any idea how hopelessly hers you already were.
While Sevika's "occupation" slowly becomes clearer to you, the amount of energy she puts into protecting you is completely out of sight and mind.
She tries to convince herself that her reasoning for continually lying in Silco's face is purely pragmatic; you're good for the community, providing a warm reprieve for the kids in the city against the harsh reality of Silco's slow revolution. As far as she's concerned, Zaun profits more from your continued thriving than any amount of money she could intimidate out of you.
The idea of ever coming into your bar for collections makes her a little sick, if she's honest. Never you. It's far too late for that now.
So when Silco sends her to do exactly that (because you're just that savvy at running your business), she feels her heart churn. She can only say no to Silco so many times and in so many ways. There's no way around this one without raising his suspicions, and she doesn't have the backing to combat that yet.
Your unfailing smile when you see her comes in makes her want to punch her own face in. She hates that she's fond of you.
"Hey good-lookin', you're late! What kept y-" "I'm here on business this time." "O..oh...?"
She explains Silco's tax with a coldness you've grown unfamiliar with from her. You take it like you would a slap to the face, growing angry before you can risk feeling sad.
"Sevika, what the hell is this? I've minded my damn business ever since I opened, the hell did I do to piss him off?" "It isn't personal, princess. You asked me what I do. I don't think I ever gave you the impression it was pretty." "If I knew petty extortion was what freedom-fighting meant to you, then I would've kept those cigs for myself."
You don't give her much more room to say anything after that before you're throwing a bag of coins at her and telling her to get the fuck out. She expected as much. You were hardy and quick to adapt, just like Zaun.
Sevika's done plenty of things in the name of a better future that she isn't proud of. But your money seemed to burn a hole through her hand, and the sting didn't fade even after she'd dropped it on Silco's desk.
"Good work," he said flippantly. Go to hell.
She imagines it's your hand holding her lighter when she smokes through nearly half a pack later that night.
The soft voice of a shelved version of her whispers that maybe just this once, she should fight for something only she wants.
She tries to push away the thought and reason that it was always going to end up this way anyways, while you close down the bar for the night alone.
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okay. HOLY FUCKING SHI-
Sun² (dark sun) looks like he's thriving LMAO 😭
Let me just say, THANK YOU MOON FOR BEING SO CURIOUS
I'm curious too, so this satisfied me so much
We got A LOT of information, and one VERY jaw dropping one
So.. sun² created a paradise for himself and others, most likely suns but not every sun. That- that honestly sounds so sweet 😭 I'm pretty sure by psychotic, sun² meant like- do things without thinking, go insane, kill for no reason ect ect.. since he doesn't like violence from what I've been able to gather. The violence he has probably committed, I am guessing was necessary because sun² thinks reasonably
But I wonder- do suns go there when they die? Like, heaven? There are already people there.. but are those people suns or random people??
His dragon is there to be a protector so, it's most likely dead suns I think..? To protect them? That'd be so sweet, I hope that's the case
Goliath died, oof 😭 I never cared much about him but that ONE THING he said to sun once;
"You..might be pathetic, but you're so much more than them."
The fact that EVEN goliath, someone so egotistical, sees sun's morals.. yet others cant and just see it as being cowardly
Our sun has been proven to be the most empathetic among all suns. He HAS done bad, but hasn't continued to do so, he tried his best to make it right. I love him sm I swear
But oh goodness. There is one MOST important jaw dropping lore we got out of sun².
Oh my fucking gosh.
Oh my.
The fact he chose this sun specifically.. BECAUSE HE COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT HIMSELF.
We already knew he was like sun, but moon broke him. Just like how it usually goes in dimensions, here's the thing, though. Even if he did the same back to him, he could NEVER kill him.
Now there's more space to understand why he did it. He couldn't do it, he wanted to give other suns a chance.
Holy shit. Holy shit.
This is too shocking for me I'm sorry
I did not think that SUN² COULDN'T KILL HIS MOON
I guess that was a thing that truly connected all suns before sun's² whole thing
The fact our sun was the first, THE FIRST WHO WAS ABLE TO AND THAT IT WASN'T AN ACCIDENT.
Finally. FINALLY IT'S BEEN PROVEN HE'S SPECIAL IN SOME SORT OF WAY
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SO LONG
The "I hate him, but couldn't kill him" thing reminds me kinda of my mother and I, just with different context 😭 like- I hate her but can't hate her completely. I have mommy issues QwQ
I literally sometimes get so mad at how she treats me that I hope she dies.
Although- lets not get into that
The point I was trying to make is, even when you swear you hate someone close to you... ESPECIALLY YOUR OWN FLESH AND BLOOD, you can never completely hate them.
That is only what I've been able to gather from other things like that
ALSO ALSO ALSO aLsOoOoooO
Why did sun² sound so unsure.. at that one part.
"I suppose nexus could sure try, if he was still around. Mumbles if he was still around..."
WHY DID HE SOUND SO UNSURE.
I wouldn't be surprised if he said it like that because he's seen how many times villains come back in this dimension ☠️☠️
LITERALLY I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED
But if nexus comes back, SHIT.
A part of me believes he will. It's after Christmas, and the new tradition is that shit happens after Christmas because the October takeover tradition ended
AAAAAAAAAA
I'll be kinda happy about it, ONLY BECAUSE THE ANGSTTT
YAYAYYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYAAAAA
Another also and another woa!! >:D
"why does EVERYTHING have to be US"
"you think I have that answer? Heh, even with my intelligence.. I can never answer that one."
EVEN SUN² ACKNOWLEDGES IT
Because the show runners need to feed us, that's the answer <333
Their lives are something else 😭 they have to deal with something new everyday. They can never catch a break
That would be all. BUT HAHSHHDD I LAUGHED SO HARD SEEING SUN² FLY HELPPPPP
He had his "I was a fairy" moment 🎀 NDNDJSJMS
okay now it's all :3
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
#dark sun tsams#tsams#tsams sun#tsams nexus#dark sun#nexus#nexus tsams#tsams dark sun#sams#sun tsams#moon tsams#daycare attendants#the sun and moon show
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If Only in my Dreams
pairing: Nat Scatorccio x reader summary: Christmas Drabble Christmas Masterlist
You carelessly upend the bags of junk food over the bed–chip bags and candy bars spilling everywhere. A pack of gummy bears balances precariously on the edge of the bed, and you absently swipe it towards the rest. Looking at it piled up, you start to wonder if it might be a little too much for just two people, but you could always make use of it tomorrow. Or, at least, you hoped. Just like you hoped Nat wouldn’t get upset with you for taking the liberty of setting it up for her.
Despite how long you’ve been dating Nat, she’s really never opened up much about her home life back when she still lived in her hometown, but you can gather that it was pretty bad. That’s why you listened so carefully whenever she described how she used to spend Christmas with her friends, as it’s one of the only times she’s sounded like she was truly enjoying herself.
She tells you about sneaking out of her window to meet her friends a few streets down, a car waiting just far enough away that her parents wouldn’t be able to hear the sound of a car starting from their trailer. Nat loved the thrill of it, the sound of gravel crunching beneath her boots as she snuck away in the dead of night. How they would find their way to the gas station a few blocks later and buy as much junk as they could with whatever spare change they managed to scrounge together. Eating it all in the backseat of the car as they smoked stolen cigarettes and blasted the stereo as loud as they could get away with before she eventually had to go back home and face reality.
The edge of bitter nostalgia that eventually overtook her voice, the realization that she could never have it again kicked in, broke your heart every time. Nat always insisted that there was nothing in that town worth going back for anymore, and you weren’t going to argue with her on that one.
For Nat you would at least try.
You’ve been sitting at the base of the headboard, spreading things out for something to do with your hands, long enough that the door finally cracks open as Nat comes home from work. A note of concern enters her voice when you don’t immediately answer when she calls out your name, her heavy footsteps slowly sounding toward the bedroom.
She comes to a stop suddenly as she sees you, her eyes slowly roving over the mess you’ve presented her with.
“Merry Christmas,” you say softly as she says nothing.
The longer she stands in the doorway without saying anything, the more uncomfortable you get, almost squirming in your seat on the bed, wincing every time it makes a bag crinkle.
“Is it dumb? This is dumb.” You laugh nervously, sitting up on your knees as you start to scoop the junk food up in your arms to push it on the floor. “You're probably tired.”
“Don't be stupid,” Nat mutters, shrugging her jacket off onto the floor to jump on the bed next to you. “You knew it was sweet.”
Nat has this way of making it sound like an accusation, as if you did something wrong by trying to do something nice for her. If it weren’t for the look on her face, shy and unsure, you might try apologizing again. But no–she likes it. You can see it in the way her lips twitch, fighting a smile she isn’t sure how to show.
You lean across the bed to press play on the CD player, some band you know she loved in high school. You’re not sure exactly what it meant to her, but her eyes still light up at the familiar chords. She pulls her boots off and drops them, a loud thud following each as they land back against the floor. Nat crosses her legs beneath her, eyes wide with something bordering on awe as she really takes it in.
“This is cool, or whatever.”
She grabs a bag of chips still held loosely in your arms, tearing it open and popping it into her mouth as she sets it between you and starts to pull everything else away from you. You watch with a grin as she reorganizes the bags, a system that makes no sense to you but works perfectly for her as she spreads them out across the bed.
“Turn it up a bit,” she says excitedly, gesturing toward the CD player. You slowly reach for the knob, looking at her hesitantly.
“Nat, it's midnight.”
“If it's not loud enough for the neighbors to complain, then it isn't really Christmas,” she insists, looking at you so eagerly that you can't help but crank it louder.
“If they come banging on the door, I’m not the one answering.”
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Favorite Hunter
Love and Deepspace Fanfic
Caleb heard that his little sister, his favorite Hunter, was in hospital. Yet, when he was with her, he can't deny his feeling of more than a brother to her
Genre: fluff Pairing: Caleb x fem!reader [usage Ayzen as the name] Words: 2.2k Warning: Caleb and the reader aren't blood-related, this is NOT incest Originally posted on AO3: HERE!
I have a writing commission, you can check it here if you're interested! Info is HERE~ [even just a repost is fine, help a girl out!]
Caleb didn’t know how to respond or how to act once he heard the news. Once he let his grandma go to the elderly house, Caleb told his favorite little sister, his only little sister, to put his number as an emergency contact. Therefore, whenever something bad happens—not like Caleb wanted things like that to befall her—he would be the first person to hear the news. Caleb didn’t think that the news he wished to never hear would come this fast. Just after he finishes his mission, he gets a call from Akso Hospital, saying that his little sister is currently there, being treated, and hasn’t woken up since the night before.
From one side, Caleb knows perfectly that his sister is strong enough that there’s nothing to worry about. Being treated in the hospital didn’t mean the end for her. But his rationality was taken with worry when he thought about the fact she hadn’t woken up since she was brought. Was there something with her? Or did she push herself too much? Maybe, there was another reason for it, something like the girl was in critical condition that put her in that situation. The more Caleb thinks, the wilder his mind goes.
It took all day for Caleb to finish his work. The moment he got an okay to go out, Caleb rushed to Akso Hospital, wishing for the best for his little sister. Either she was awake, or she was in a stable condition. Caleb was scared, part of himself was scared to see his little sister to be awakened alone. He should have been there, he should have stayed by her side when she needed him the most. The thought of her waking alone was undeniably his fear. Caleb now wishes for the girl to still be asleep, the best option for him.
“She’s awake once, but it didn’t take too long for her to go back to sleep. She has a fever, quite high. A trauma to her head and some bruises and scratches around her hands. But that’s all.”
“Thank you for looking after her while I can’t be here.” Caleb’s voice was low, it was even hard for the nurse to hear it. As a reply, the nurse who takes care of the strong hunter gives a small smile before leaving him, reminding Caleb about the visiting hour. “I’m sorry it took a long time for me to get here,” Caleb said, brushing his hand to the girl’s hair.
Looking at the furrowed brown, Caleb couldn’t help himself from feeling more guilty. If he was there when she woke up, would the result be different? Trying not to think too much, Caleb’s other hand brushed across her forehead, trying to ease any of the stress his little sister felt. There was undoubtedly affection from his touch, showing how much he cared for the girl. Not only as his little sister but much more than that. Caleb wonders if the girl would notice his feelings through his act.
“Caleb …?” A hoarse voice called out, snapping Caleb from his daydream. “It’s cold ….”
“Good morning, Pipsqueak,” Caleb replied, giving a low chuckle to ease the tension between them. "Do you want me to tell the nurse to add the blanket for you?”
“No,” she answered, trying her best to open her eyes and stare into Caleb’s. His purple eyes were always able to catch her captive as nothing else mattered but him. “Why are you here? Aren’t you busy?”
“How come I be busy when My Pipsqueak was this sick?” Caleb ruffled the girl’s hair, trying to act nonchalant about his words. He might want her to notice his feelings, a feeling more than a brother for her, but what if she has nothing like that toward him? He would only ruin their relationship.
“So you come because of me.” It’s not hard for Caleb to notice the dejected tone from the girl, making him once again ruffle her bangs. “Caleb!”
With his usual smirk, Caleb started to say, “Why are you worrying about that now? When I was sick before, you even tried your best to cut apples for me even though you were barely able to hold the big knife! Or when you run through the field just to give me an umbrella. Unfortunately, both of us became drenched since your umbrella was so small. Your hair is wet and you look ….”
“Ah, stop it, stop it!” Though she felt a bit dizzy, the girl tried her best to sit straight and cover Caleb’s lips with both of her hands. “It’s embarrassing to remember, so please stop.”
“Okay, I will,” Caleb responded with a light laugh, watching the flushed face of his little sister. Even if it’s not because she was embarrassed, there’s a high possibility the reason was her fever, she still looks cute from Caleb’s point of view. “You need to stay here for a few days. I didn’t tell grandma about your condition.”
“It’s better for her to not hear anything.” Feeling weak, the girl decided to lie down again, pulling the blanket under her chin. “I didn’t want to worry her. Zayne said that the fever came from the trauma on my head. It won’t affect anything. My heart was in good condition too. Even Captain said I could go back to work next Monday.”
“That fast?”
Caleb blinks a few times, trying to comprehend the girl’s words. Next Monday was only a few days away, indicating that she wouldn’t have a full week of rest. Worry etched on Caleb’s face, reminding the fact she was sick and the reason he was there. The girl couldn’t help herself from feeling guilty, she knows how much Caleb cares for her and only wants the best for her. if she pushed herself too much, Caleb would be the one in trouble, just like right now.
Instead of reassurance that Caleb needed and wanted, the girl only gave vague replies. Saying sorry to Caleb, saying sorry the second time for being a burden to him, saying sorry the third time for taking up his time, and saying sorry for the fourth time for being weak. Before she could say her fifth sorry, Caleb already flicked her forehead, inching closer to her face so his forehead touched her. It was quite an intimate position, but Caleb knew perfectly that his little hunter wouldn’t think something strange.
“Why do you keep saying sorry? It was my own decision to be here, by your side. Do you need to say sorry so much for my own choice?”
“Caleb ….” The girl, once again, could only stare into Caleb’s eyes, drowning in his deep stares. “I'm sorry … ah, thank you!”
Noticing the shyness from the girl, Caleb took a step back before ruffling her bangs again, something he likes to do as a teasing and as a way to show his affection. Before he could retract his hand to his side, he was thinking about feeding her an apple, the girl already took his hand, holding his wrist tight with her hot hand. Her fever was not a joke, showing how much she needed to rest. The pleading look from her makes Caleb weak, both in his heart and his knees.
“What is it, Ayzen?” Instead of his usual pet name, Caleb couldn’t help himself from calling her name.
“Don’t go.”
“I’m only away to cut you some apple. One apple a day to keep the doctor away, right?”
“Don’t,” the girl demands. “I want you to be here. You said that you came for me, right? Then, won’t you hear your little sister’s plea?”
His little sister.
Caleb wonders when he will be able to get rid of that title. He was sick of that title, he wanted the girl in front of him to be more than his little sister. Instead of responding to his mind, Caleb gives a smile to Ayzen before he intertwines his fingers with her, the one that she held on his wrist. Both of their hand were hot, one from the fever, and the other from the raging feeling inside of him. Caleb’s other hand was stroking her cheek, trying to make sure he was there.
The slow stroke slowly lulled her to sleep. Yet, before that happened, Ayzen’s eyes were wide open, showing horror. It didn’t take long before Caleb shushed her, stroking her cheeks even at an urgent speed. He wished that his warmth could remind her that she was with him, and not in any of her nightmares. Her grip on Caleb’s finger became tight, not wanting to let him go just yet. Caleb’s thumb stroked the back of her hand, giving the reassurance she needed.
“Caleb, you promise … that you won’t leave me, right?”
“Of course. When you wake up, I’ll be here. If you want, I can take a day off just to be with you.”
“You will … but you have your work.”
“How many times do you think I skipped school before just so I can take care of you when you’re sick? After all, you’re my favorite Hunter.” Caleb’s hand stopped stroking Ayzen’s face, sharing his calming warmth with her. “To be with you is more important. I don’t want something bad to happen to you. I promise to Grandma too, that I will protect you and be with you whenever you need.”
“Would you lay beside me?”
Ayzen’s words made Caleb bewildered. It’s not like it was the first time for them to sleep together in one bed. Growing up means different, at least for Caleb. He could no longer feel nothing when he hugged his little sister from behind. His pretend little sister. For Caleb, the one he hugged was not a little kid he used to protect, it was a woman he started to realize he loved with his whole heart. Just thinking about it almost made Caleb confess to her, his true feelings for her.
Caleb bit back his words, giving a low smile before teasing the girl about how she was still childish as usual. Instead of an angry reply, Ayzen said that it was okay since she was sick. What if Caleb took advantage of this moment? The moment that thought came, Caleb shook his head, chuckling to himself before getting into the bed, hugging Ayzen, and putting her head on his arm to rest, getting it close to his chest. How much Caleb loves to do this to her.
“You’re warm for me who are cold.”
“You should have just asked for more blankets. Visiting hours would end soon.”
“But you’re warmer,” Ayzen whined, hugging Caleb tighter before burying her face in his chest. “Being able to hug you gives me some sort of encouragement and strength. It feels like my fever was long gone now.”
“Don’t jinx it, Pipsqueak.” Caleb chuckles once again before he plays with her hair, trying to lull her to sleep. “I’m here now, I will protect you. So, go to sleep and rest.”
With a sleepy tone, Ayzen talks again, “Caleb … why do you say I’m your favorite Hunter? Is it because I’m your little sister? Or because you only know me as Hunter?”
It took a few minutes for Caleb to give an answer. Even he didn’t know how to say it without dropping hints about his feelings towards her. Kissing the top of her head, Caleb tries to be more gentle than ever. Even his voice, the way he talked, he didn’t want to alert the half-asleep hunter in his arms. Slowly, he started to explain the reason behind him calling his little sister his favorite hunter. It’s not because she was the only one he knew, it was not because she was his little sister.
“No reason,” Caleb said, still playing with Ayzen’s hair to make her sleep faster. “Even when I know other Hunters, even when I see someone who proudly introduced as the best Hunters, you’re still the best, my favorite, in my eyes. There’s no reason needed.”
“You’re … silly.”
“I’m your silly, Pipsqueak,” Caleb whispered, his voice driving the girl deeper to sleep. The hands that were holding onto his clothes tightly slowly became loose, telling Caleb how she was ready to go to the dreamland. “I know how hard you work, I know how hard you wish to be a Hunter, I saw your strength, and everything else that no one can ever see. That reason alone was the only thing why you’re my favorite Hunter.”
Caleb’s words faded into the dreamland Ayzen was now in. In Caleb’s arm, she knows that she’s safe. In his arms, she knows that she will be okay, everything around her will be okay too. While still stroking her hair, Caleb heard the nurse reminding him that the visiting hour had ended. With a begging face, mumbling to the nurse, Caleb asked for him to accompany Ayzen while she was asleep. In that kind of position, there’s no way for him to be able to get out without waking her up.
“Just don’t forget to remind her to rest much,” the nurse said before leaving the two of them.
Another smile can be seen on Caleb’s face when the girl nuzzled closer to his chest. “Because I like you, Pipsqueak. You’re my favorite Hunter because I like you. Are you satisfied with my answer, Ayzen?”
#ran's writing#love and deepspace#love and deep space#lads#fem!reader#x reader#lnds#lads x reader#lads caleb#caleb love and deepspace#lads fluff#loveanddeepspace
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Just how close are Hermes and Apollo? and is Dionysus close with Apollo too in the myths?
I'd made a post about the friendship between Apollo and Hermes before. And I'm actually making a similar post about Apollo and Dionysus but it's gonna take some time. But in short, yes I'd say they both are close to Apollo. Especially in their cults, Apollo and Dionysus shared a really close bond.
#asks#kylienriley#yknow I'd actually thought I'd condense what I wanted to say about Apollo-Dionysus in this answer#but then I eventually decided to make a separate post because there's so much to talk about them!#< in case you're wondering why I took this long to answer#because gathering resources is easier than putting them all together coherently :')
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g-guh..
agh!!! magnify!!! sorry how are you doing??? I got ,, distracted,,,,
#whenever you're wondering why it's taking so long to answer asks just imagine it as my dumbass binge watchig mlp#anonvoid#a-narcissists-warren ask tag#sometimes i listen to some episodes while drawing and get distracted so.......ckinda kindacanon-
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me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU
#rambling#surprisingly this is not about jakob.. im just really consistent about my favorite character archetypes 😭😭#WARNING THE NOTES ON THIS ARE REALLY LONG I STARTED RAMBLING#“ouhh i have a headache i'll just lie down and rotate my blorbos in no general direction for a while until it goes away” and then boom.#serious plot considerations. 2 questions answered 24million new questions raised. this is specifically Not what i asked for.#so now im sitting here STILL dizzy running mental calculations on how i can get this bitch out of peril without reworking everything#but they literally keep dying in every timeline 😭😭 every single plausible road leads to them running off and screwing themself over#“character who doesn't realize they want to live until it's way too late to look back” VS#“character who is forced to live and handle the things they never though they'd survive long enough to deal with” FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.#fucking hell i have never had this much trouble writing a character as i have with them#they genuinely do just run off and do shit without my permission and then i have to pace for an hour or two wondering#“ok they wOULD do that. but should they. do i feel like i can confidently write that.”#im like constantly in this tug of war trying to get them to CHILL#but also they are absolutely my favorite character from the entire project. but like. FUCK GET BACK HERE#is death the most satisfying end to this arc? is someone who was Set on dying then NOT dying the most satisfying end to the arc?#how many bridges can you burn until you irreparably set yourself aflame too?#would ghost or revival plotline work?? would it make sense with the worldbuilding??#do i just Like Them enough to want them to not die?? where do i draw the line between personal bias and a good arc?#is death not feeling as impactful as survival solely because i've been writing for so long that it's lost the initial impact?#and other such plot considerations...#im gonna have such an easy time writing another character though 😭😭 because THAT character's dynamic in the second act#is to stare at character 1 and be like “why are you like this. i mean i know Why but can you chill. please.” and like damn bro me too#actually wait no i think kaey.a is the hardest character i've ever written i take it back#had to worry about his 20million facades AND his Actual feelings AND canon compliance. shit is hard#i still havent finished the k/aeya fic i started back when the chasm first released which is uhh. two years ago. oops.#i think i struggle writing emotionally repressed liars i think thats what this is 😭😭 anyways.#(voice of guy who has been obsessed with nonlinear narratives and tragedies for several years):#“is it too much to kill this character in a nonlinear exploration game with tragic elements”#like bitch what are you talking about 😭😭 YOU'RE the target audience here figure it out#sorry the notes on this are just my writing journal now apparently
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Oh dear, I was dead for 3 entire weeks.
#why hello!#if you're wondering why I was dead for so long#my answer to that is I got artblock right after posting the last one#and then I also got a new stylus#but was unable to actually get the motivation to draw with it#so that's been a mess#I hope to be able to post more as this stylus is better than the last one#though I'm still trying to get used to this new stylus#I'm also experimenting with artstyles#as always#this wasn't intended to be Dokja but then it looked too much like Dokja so I decided ''eh fudge it why not''#kitos art#fanart#omniscient reader's viewpoint#omniscient reader#orv#kim dokja
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I hate when I get into these phases when once I process through one thing causing me anxiety there's another thing right behind it
#we've moved on to ye olde ''what if i have repressed memories and horrible things have happened that I don't remember''#which...#like...#to some degree you have to go with a schrodinger answer. like... it's inherently not true#but the weird part is that I have weird anxiety when I think about certain family members bc of this#but when I'm actually around them it's no more uncomfortable than any family member you're not around often#so I'm like OH NO WHAT IF SAID FAMILY MEMBER WHO I HAVEN'T SEEN IN YEARS DID SOMETHING TO ME#BUT I REPRESSED IT#and like... a what if is just a what if. do I believe it? no. do I fixate on it and get wildly afraid? sometimes#also it's not even consistent sometimes I'm like ah yes family member I haven't seen in ages I wonder what he's up to#and then other times it's like I'VE HEARD SO MANY STORIES OF FAMILY MEMBERS RAPING THEIR NIECES AND STUFF#WHAT IF THAT HAPPENED TO ME#actually I feel like watching law and order SVU made a lot of these anxieties worse like that's part of why I stopped watching it#bc it exacerbates a lot of anxiety my mind tries to throw at me#anyway I do not actually think any family member has done anything and I don't actually believe I have repressed memories#or else I would have probably brought it up to my parents. I'm still like ''ooogh anxiety monster what if?'' about it tho#which is why we have philippians 4:8!! is is true? categorically due to being a ''what if'' anxiety — nope!! okiedoke moving on#k I just needed to talk through this I'm done now#*I'm barely any more uncomfortable than with any family member I haven't seen in a long time#(tbf I'm generally less comfortable with my dad's family bc 1) no female relatives other than grandma and 2) I see them way less often)
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Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh today I've been constantly experiencing the urge to un-private today-in-the-devildom & start writing for it again
#i'm gonna ramble in the tags but#i've been talking with starr (if you're reading this--hi starr!! <3) about the blog today and sharing some of the entries#and it just made me miss it so much#+ the conversation actually made me realize some other reasons why i didn't enjoy the blog in general anymore#like i genuinely love the blog and i genuinely loved writing for it & that conversation reminded me of that#but also there were so many reasons that ultimately pushed me to more or less abandon the blog & then later private it too#so i'm kind of at a loss here#tbh i think i'm mostly just scared to pick the blog up again only for it to end exactly like last time i picked it back up#i've actually always wanted for the blog to be a source of inspiration y'know?#like the things mentioned in the entries are kinda just small ideas right#i was hoping that people would read these & feel inspired to write or draw something of their own based on my entries#that was actually what made me start the blog in the first place. the hope that i could inspire others that way#aaahhhhhh.... maybe it's on me since i could have more openly communicated that idea......#i did get to meet one wonderful person who wrote a few fics based on my entries tho!! (hi ali <3)#but yeah..there's that#also the way engagement just dropped significantly after a while#like i know i was gone for a good while & that a lot of people left the fandom and all that#but still getting maybe one reblog if i'm lucky really feels like a punch to the gut#ESPECIALLY considering that i was close to 900 followers on there#do you guys know that feeling when you proudly show someone you care about something you did only to get a disinterested answer?#yeah...#that's essentially how it feels like to me#and well as you might know the feeling of “why should i keep writing if apparently no one cares” eventually won... haha.....#but aaaahhhhh i'm still clinging onto the hope & what ifs here#that conversation with starr really just made me forget about everything that frustrated me about the blog & left me with this#longing feeling to start again lol#hey if you've made it this far into the tags let me just ask--would you care if i picked the blog back up?#would you also *show* that you care?#i'm actually quite curious (you could almost call me george lol)#anyway maybe we'll see each other on today-in-the-devildom again in the future.. who knows
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okay i really don't like asks that focus on something else trying to be cute and sassy with haterism when i point out racism/misogyny. so pretty please don't send asks like this anymore okay. the same goes for sending me asks showing me hate about characters i love and complaining about the person you have beef with that said it. i really don't wanna see that and i don't know what you expect me to say other than "damn bro that sucks"
that being said can i interest you in marisha ray's Knowing Fujoshi Glance
#🍃#ship negativity#i've let some asks with sassy remarks/jabs about other things on the end slide but seriously cut it out#in case you're wondering why it took me so long to answer certain asks about imogen hate#i can only say 'people are misogynist assholes' over and over for so long before i get exhausted#don't bully my moggy :(
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the desire to write vs my new work schedule that means i'm fucking exhausted by the time i've done everything i need to do to prepare for the next day
#I HATE BEING AN ADULT#HATE HATE HATE IT#that is the Only thing i miss about being a waitress#was the fact i had more time during my productive hours of the day to work on things i love#like writing#or talking/playing with my friends#that plus the fact i usually only worked friday to sunday??#bliss#sure they were hellish days and i hated being at my job and it drained the life out of me but#i had 4 whole days to do whatever the fuck i wanted with#i have been Deprived of that now JSJDJWD#anyway#if you're wondering why i've been absent for so long#there's your answer#ngl my account is absolutely dead now but#i only have myself to blame ig#i miss interacting with y'all though :((
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when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool) <333
Ahh thank you, this is so sweet ;__; here goes, in no particular order:
Epik High - Rosario
Ado - ギラギラ
BAP - Wake me up
HMKU - ぬくもり
BEAST - 12:30
Honorable mention because I keep waiting to get one (1) anon hate so that I can reply with this song and nothing else but I guess the antis are scared of me 😔
#ask#cosmicatta#thank you so much but also this was so hard 😂😂#there are so many songs i like#if you're wondering why it took me so long to answer this#it's because i spent every day mulling over it and going down memory lane with kpop#i still listen to the groups i linked regularly#but i forgot how much i love tvxq and big bang too ahaha#so thank you xD#but seeing the timestamps on all these MVs? i feel so fucking old now 😂😂#youtube what do you MEAN '14 years ago'???#this song came out like three years ago??#i can't believe i'm basically an auntie fan now
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