#If he were written more like Boromir these movies would have been more of a tragedy

[corellianhounds]

Amidala the Resilient

Media: Revenge of the Sith

Rating: T

Word Count: 3,942

Warnings: Canon-typical violence, pregnancy, Force-choking, blood and injuries, traumatic labor and delivery, death in childbirth, no happy ending.

Art Credit: Iain McCaig, The Art of Star Wars, Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

Summary: In a universe where Anakin gradually descended into the Dark side of his own volition from the beginning— where his ambition and love were genuine and admirable, but the temptation of power too much— his turn is something much more destructive and purposeful. Amidala’s plan for retaliation is just as much so.

Padmé Amidala can feel tension twinging in her back and thighs. The pit in her stomach has coalesced into a tight knot as she steels herself for what she must do, bringing a mattock and salt to the ground where pruning shears should have been used long ago.

Anakin had been too far gone for a long time, and the fault lay in her and everyone in his life willingly turning a blind eye too often to his myriad of faults. In the past two hours she has seen actions the result of which came from an upbringing where his temper, jealousy, and ambition were allowed to slide because those who thought him destined for some great cosmic good were willing to overlook occasional— and often objectively justified— acts of wrath and ruthlessness. He had always been so good at justifying his reasons and putting his actions in a more favorable light, showing enough willingness for correction over the years people thought he was receptive to guidance and change.

What she’d come to realize with dawning horror was that the seeds of destruction had been sown long ago, and though the vines had borne occasional good fruit, they had always grown with selfish intent, inevitably choking out everything around them in an effort to keep his own desires hidden behind the barrier of thorns.

In the next hour, she will come face to face with the monster of a man he’s become.

The Jedi master doesn’t know. Kenobi knows she has some plan but wrongfully assumes it is to appeal to whatever mistaken shred of humanity might remain in Anakin. Obi-Wan— even now, even after what they saw— cares for him as a brother and would sooner cut off his own hand than see Anakin completely lost to the Dark. Padmé however has finally seen clarity of purpose.

For Anakin to be stopped, he must be killed.

The ship arrives on Mustafar. Padmé wrenches herself away from the viewport as Obi-Wan lands and she gingerly lowers herself to the cargo hold, donning a cloak. Obi-Wan hurriedly finishes the landing cycle, calling her name as she gathers her strength, but she’s hardly listening to him at this point and she knows she must conceal herself from him so he has no chance of stopping her.

A hand on her shoulder makes her flinch, and the Jedi lets go almost in surprise. “Padmé, you don’t have to do this. I will talk to him.”

“No,” she says, keeping her left hand secured across her waist beneath the voluminous sleeve as she cleared a path to the lowering gangway. “He’s made it very clear he’s past the point of reasoning with the Jedi. I will speak with him, and if I cannot convince him to come with us calmly, or I cannot ascertain his next move, I expect you to do what’s necessary to end this treason. That is an order.”

It was all false diplomacy, of course, for his sake. Padmé had no intention of believing Anakin was anywhere close to the realm of negotiation. They were far past that.

But she needed assurance that she could get close enough to Anakin to act decisively. She couldn’t have Kenobi interfering, not at this juncture.

Oppressive heat surrounded her as she swept down the ramp to the barren ground. Magma roiled and churned, flames flickering at the edge of the peninsula as Padmé approached the figure so cloaked in darkness an aura of blackened energy almost seemed to emanate from his form. The grip of the hidden dagger dug into her hand, grounding her as she approached.

Padmé’s eyes burned with a ferocity to match her husband’s. It was time for this to end.

When Obi-Wan had seen her determination in the hold of the ship he had never for a moment anticipated what it would lead to.

Padmé steadily approached Anakin, cloak and hood protecting her from the blaze. He could see her speaking forcefully with him, her face hidden from view but Anakin’s darkening by the moment in response. His right hand, devoid of glove, clenched the hilt of an already ignited saber, the bloodshine blade standing in stark contrast to his own cloak. Its presence alone was alarming, but Obi-Wan had been subject to so many tragedies that night already, he merely assumed Anakin had readied it in the expectation of facing himself.

What Obi-Wan hadn’t known was what Padmé concealed until she tried to close the distance between them, her own blade in hand. What followed happened in the span of a heartbeat.

Anakin’s saber blocked it on instinct, easily halting the approach of Padmé’s dagger, his eyes widening in surprise. In the following moment his left hand raised and with it, so did Padmé.

Obi-Wan’s astonishment lasted only a fraction of a second as he yelled “NO!” Padmé’s feet left the ground as an invisible force clutched her neck in a crushing, intangible grip, and in the breadth of time Padmé scrabbled at her throat, Obi-Wan acted.

Anakin stumbled back from the force of the bolt hitting his shoulder, releasing his hold on Padmé. Padmé crumpled to the ground in a heap, and Anakin’s sights zeroed in on Kenobi, standing at the mouth of the ship with both blaster and lightsaber in hand. Snarling, Anakin stalked towards his old master and brought his lightsaber down, red clashing against blue.

Padmé Amidala, heartbroken and dying, drags herself bleeding to the communication console.

Kenobi can hear her movement in the bay and yells her name, telling her not to move, that he’ll come to help her as soon as the ship breaches the atmosphere, and she stalwartly ignores him, cradling the underside of her belly with one hand and using the other to support herself on the railing around the sparse artillery deck. Her broken ankle protests at every movement, sending lightning arcing up the leg where she puts her unsteady weight. The cramps in her abdomen spread like bone-coral, sharp and hot and agonizing in her pelvis, sides, back— Every tendon and muscle in her body screams at its owner to relent, to succumb to the creeping darkness pressing around her vision, but she cannot allow herself peace until she finishes what she started.

Padmé staggers at the ship’s turbulent acceleration, her forearm slamming out against the bulkhead as the lights flicker, and she curses the unsteady pilot she thought was her friend. Perhaps if she’d been accompanied by someone more decisive, someone whose fatal flaw wasn’t a love too great for a brother that no longer existed, Anakin would have been dealt with and she’d have the wherewithal to fight against the added pain of a labor she was sure would tear her in two.

Sweat pours from her brow and forces her already shaking, slippery hands to scrabble for purchase on the blasted polished finery of a spoiled noble’s ship. Her muscles spasm and she gasps in abject terror as she feels something inside her snap; the membrane within her had ruptured.

Gravity pulls on her bones as her muscles betray her, and she collapses against the bench. Fingernails scrape vinyl and she chokes out a guttural, rending cry of pain in the effort it takes to haul herself upward into the seat.

Obi-Wan is yelling again. Traitorous coward.

Padmé punches in the covert frequency on the transmitter. Her other hand rests on her stomach, her infants moving restlessly under her touch. She forces the hot flashes of pain back, shoving down every instinctive response to curl in on herself.

“Sabé—,” she says into the comm, gritting her teeth and tasting blood once more; the contractions were stronger and with a strangled grunt she yanks the comm closer, ignoring the frantic waves of worry rolling off of the useless Jedi in the pilot’s seat.

“Sabé, if you find the man who was my husband,” she chokes, the creeping black at the edges of her vision beginning to overtake her.

“Kill him.”

Obi-Wan sat listlessly on a bench in the hold, what bloodied clothing he still wore sticking to him like a second skin. His hand rested on the makeshift bassinet, a gun locker repurposed into a cradle.

He could only imagine what directive she’d felt necessary enough to strain herself to get across the sublight waves; he could only imagine because the message was encrypted and the recipient unknown, and her mind had been shielded from his probing. He didn’t know whether to blame his failed use of the Force on the heartbroken, distracted nature of his psyche being pulled in a thousand directions as he’d manually flown from Mustafar’s orbital pull in order to make the jump to lightspeed, or to blame some unknown energy stalwartly blocking him from Padmé’s mind. Reaching out to her had felt like hitting a steel wall.

The tumult of their departure had preoccupied him until he was sure he’d escaped whatever enemy fighters Anakin’s new master had sent after them, the maneuvering less of a dogfight and more of a half-cocked evasive prayer for the hull to remain intact long enough for them to break atmo. Klaxons blared and the astronav’s interface barked orders, warning him of too many systems he already knew were damaged enough that if they took even one more hit to the hull they would be obliterated; shields were failing, exterior panelling being shorn off, the pursuing fighters gaining on them— Until by some stroke of luck he’d found a slip in space to pull through and immediately jump to lightspeed.

Lightspeed jumps themselves were already hazardous to expecting parents’ health. He was terrified of the condition she had been in when he’d finally gotten her onboard, and the fact he could sense her moving with purpose somewhere below decks while he tried to shake the fighters had sent his heart rate skyrocketing.

Piloting had never been his forte. As soon as they’d hit hyperspace he’d slammed a hand against the autopilot controls and bolted from the dash, scrambling down to the hold below.

He swore under his breath, calling her name and skidding to a halt beside her. Her face twisted in agony, her hands clutching the underside of her abdomen. Obi-Wan knelt beside her, hesitant to move her and instead ran a quick check over her vitals, astonished at what he found.

Broken bones in her leg, fractured ribs, internal bleeding, damaged trachea— how had she even moved?! By all rights she should be dead and yet something had propped her up long enough for her to drag herself to the terminal and send a message.

And now she was in labor.

“Kenobi—” she spat derisively, grabbing his tunic. “Get— up—”

“Padmé, hold still, let me—”

He was cut off as a violent shudder wracked her body, her limbs curling in on herself with a gurgling cry. Panicked desperation lanced through him as he reached out and grasped tendrils of the Force, gingerly cradling her neck and attempting to delicately, swiftly mend ligaments he couldn’t see. If he was even a millimeter incorrect, she would die.

A misaligned vertebrae shifted back into place, and Padmé screamed.

Obi-Wan bit back a sob, carefully tracing his fingers on either side of the back of her neck with as much force as he dared in an attempt to still her and provide what pain relief he could as his own energy was leached from him. Padmé gasped, her eyes flying open, her expression stricken as she looked up at the ceiling. Her iron grip loosened as the tension dissipated, if only in one area. She gulped air as if coming up from the bottom of a lake, and Obi-Wan settled as he felt his strength wane. A concrete task was better than guesswork at unknown variables.

The reprieve didn’t last long; Padmé grunted in pain, convulsing as a contraction rippled through her torso again. Further assessment revealed her leggings and the floor beneath her to be drenched, and Obi-Wan’s panic flared again.

“I have to get you up—”

“If you move me I will kill you,” she spat harshly. She trembled despite the ferocity of her glare, her hand still twisted in his robe. “There is no time— Here and now, Kenobi. Make do.”

“Padmé—”

“Look around you,” she seethed. “There’s no level surface in this blasted ship big enough to work. There are no other choices. There is no one else to help. Sleeves up. Now.”

Kenobi’s brow remained twisted as he stripped off his outer tunic, knowing it was laden with silicate and volcanic dust. Padmé propped herself up on her elbows as he raced to scour his hands and forearms, coming back to remove her boots so he could work her outer garments free. Whether the blood seeping between her teeth was due to the injuries she’d sustained or because she was gritting them hard enough one had cracked, he didn’t know.

Padmé gasped again as the fracture in her shin shifted— He wanted to settle her, to fix this, but the contractions were coming more quickly and closer together. They were running out of time.

He finally seated himself before her, kneeling and shaking in just his undershirt and trousers, feeling acutely unprepared for what was to come. Battlefield triage and casualty care were the extent of his healing knowledge, and though he was adept at relieving or numbing acute nociceptive responses, it was usually with soldiers whose minds were open for him to assess areas of injury. A commander with a blaster burn would be focused on the point where his plastoid hadn’t covered. A civilian’s attention after suffering a fall would be turned to the joints and bones that took the brunt of the effects of gravity.

Labor and delivery were far too different from his experience in the medical field.

And Padmé was still blocking him out.

Her knuckles gripped bone-white to a ridge of floor plating, one knee bent and her foot planted flat. The other lay weakly to the side, and Obi-Wan grit his teeth as he raised it up to rest over his thigh despite the lancing pain he felt radiating from her, tucking a blanket beneath her and readying his hands for whatever instruction he prayed she could give. With him gathering his wits and her gathering her strength, they set to work.

The whole ordeal couldn’t have lasted longer than ten minutes, and it was the longest and most arduous process of their lives. Between her strangled cries, his intuition, and the muscle spasms that told him everything about this was wrong, Kenobi’s concern grew with the pool of blood beneath her, and she forced him to focus on the children, refusing to allow him any modicum of time spent healing her injuries between her screams. Untended bone cracked further as she thrashed, her screams echoing back in the cargo hold.

By the time Kenobi had swaddled the two squalling— living!— infants in what sterile dressing he could find from the field kit, Padmé had gone a sickly pale. Her skin was waxy under the recessed halogen lighting, her hair sticking to her forehead. Dark circles rimmed her eyes and different muscle groups continued twitching of their own accord as if sparked by electricity. Obi-Wan was torn between ensuring the infants had been properly cared for, and wanting to drag Padmé to the captain’s berth to fully assess her wounds and heal her: Padmé kept stubbornly shoving him away, tears tracking unnoticed down her face as she continued to choke out instructions for the care and keeping of her children.

He’d finally been forced to stop when that iron grip returned in full force— Padmé grabbed his arm and yanked him down to where she had propped herself up against the wall. Kenobi lurched forward, her ashen face now level with his. She forced her voice to obey despite the strain in her throat, rasping the words she needed to say.

“Keep them away from him.” The venom in her tone was undeniable. “You keep them safe, Kenobi, get— get them as far away as you can—”

Kenobi grunted, refusing to let her continue her orders. He pressed a palm to her chest, willing those wisps of energy to sustain her just a few moments longer as he tried to haul her up into his lap, coax her arm around him so he could lift her— If he could just get her somewhere comfortable, somewhere clean, if he could focus—

Padmé shrieked in pain, clawing at his chest and arms, and the sum of their separate fights came crashing down on him as the Force dissipated from his mind’s grasp. His knees gave out, his strength sapped from the energy he had poured into her, and they lay heavily back against the terminal yet again. The children cried distantly behind them.

“Padmé, please…” Obi-Wan pleaded, tears streaking down his face, but she shook her head yet again.

“Keep them safe,” she coughed, begging for the first time. “Get them away f-from—”

“He’s gone, Padmé, Anakin is gone—”

She shook her head fiercely, squeezing her eyes shut. “No. He’s there. I can feel him.”

“Listen to me— Anakin is dead, I saw him—”

“You’re wrong,” Padmé said. Her breath rattled. Tears dripped from her chin. “If— If you won’t k-kill him then t-take care o-of them. Wh-Whatever it takes.”

Her chest hitched as she gasped around the liquid filling her lungs. Her bloody hand trembled against his neck. She hiccuped, her eyes went glassy, and her hand fell away.

And in the stillness of hyperspace, Padmé Amidala Naberrie passed from one life to the next.

It had been an hour since then. Only an hour since Obi-Wan had had to keep himself from buckling under the weight of his grief, an hour since he’d sobbed on the floor of a ship as one of his oldest and dearest friends died in his arms. The former queen of Naboo, dying in the bloody cargo hold of a stolen ship, her own life stolen from her by the one person the two of them had trusted beyond measure while her infant children cried out for comfort he felt wholly incapable of providing. Obi-Wan wept alongside them, digging his fingers into the cold, unfeeling floor, wanting to scream as the agony of heartbreak threatened to overwhelm him.

So many dead, or lost. There was no solace even in the Force.

But as Obi-Wan Kenobi found himself doing so often in his life, he shoved his feelings down into the furthest recesses of his broken heart, let go of another loved one returned to the Force, and turned himself back to the task at hand.

The infants were asleep now. He’d shakily scrubbed at his face and arms with cold water and spared only enough time under the sanisteam to ensure he was clean enough to handle them before finding a spare undershirt for himself. He fed them, cleaned them up, and held both of them together against his chest as they squirmed, dissatisfied at their situation before accepting their present accommodations and falling asleep. By the ship’s chrono he had roughly two standard hours before the ship was due to drop out of hyperspace.

He sat unseeing in the captain’s berth with the ad hoc bassinet nearby. Padmé was still in the hold; he couldn’t be two places at once, and he couldn’t stay down there with the children.

Something bothered him about the infants in his arms, though. Once the girl had passed from Padmé’s body, it almost seemed like the barrier keeping him from sensing Padmé’s thoughts had broken. He was too drained and scattered to dwell on it as his last moments with her had been focused on her well-being, but despite his utter exhaustion he had a suspicion that had already begun to crystallize under the sheer openness of the twins’ young presences within hyperspace.

It troubled him.

Whatever message she’d sent was evidently received by the people she’d needed it to. Bail Organa met him at the hastily assembled but covert rendezvous, his ensuing shock and horror upon entering the ship’s docking ramp turning to commanding resolve as he followed the trail of destruction to Kenobi’s station. Organa had to shake him from his stupor before Obi-Wan could tell him of Mustafar, of the newly appointed Sith and Padmé’s scheme, and of Padmé’s last words. The senator’s brow furrowed. He knelt next to the Jedi, looking over the sleeping children.

“What of Anakin?”

Obi-Wan shook his head tiredly. “I cannot sense him. I don’t believe Anakin is alive.”

“… Who else did she contact?” Bail asked.

Tears dripped onto Obi-Wan’s shirt. “I don’t know.”

Bail sighed, bringing one hand up to rest on his shoulder. “I am truly sorry, Obi-Wan. For everything.”

Obi-Wan couldn’t respond.

Bail’s team, handpicked and vetted by the senator himself, worked below decks as the men weighed their options. The aftermath of the despotic coup was rippling out and changing by the minute; the Jedi had been slaughtered and scattered, the clones had broken all communication, and the Senate had reached a fever pitch of chaos. Anything that needed to be done had to be done now.

The feeling of loss that bordered on consuming him was one he’d rarely felt in his lifetime as acutely as he did now. The comfort he found in the Force was absent. He’d felt like a ship unmoored when his master was killed. Now it was as though he’d been dropped into the middle of a hurricane.

Bail’s hands were clasped loosely together against his forehead, elbows resting on his knees as he bowed his head in thought. Kenobi could have been a corpse for how still and gaunt he was.

“Obi-Wan…” Bail began. “Are you certain Skywalker is dead?”

“Yes,” Obi-Wan said. “I cannot sense him at all.”

Bail was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. “… But you, of all people, couldn’t sense what must have been growing within him. Is it at all possible the body of Anakin remains, but the reason you cannot find him is because the man we knew is entirely lost to the Dark?”

A chilling fissure of clarity cut through Obi-Wan’s senses. His reaction told Bail everything he needed to know.

Even if it was only a suspicion, they could not afford to waste time figuring out the emperor’s next move. Anything that could be used to motivate Vader had to be hidden from public knowledge. They couldn’t leave a trace of his past behind.

Bail mulled over his thoughts, then stood, gesturing for Kenobi as his resolve hardened to steel. “Come. We have work to do. We will mourn when we are done.”

Sabé trembled with the effort it took to control her breathing. She stowed her bag behind the seat of the starship and brought the engine to life, moving with purpose as tears streamed unbidden down her face.

The ship rose, coordinates locked in place to meet the others of her gathering retinue. These weren’t the orders of former nobility, of a governing senator— This was the last request of a dying friend, someone whose very existence was woven into her bones. Padmé Amidala’s death would not be in vain.

Sabé looked out beyond the stars, her breathing finding stasis despite the ocean of grief beneath it.

“My hands are yours, Padmé,” she said to herself. “For as long duty compels them.”

She wasn’t going to kill Anakin. Not until he felt every bit of the pain and suffering he deserved.

Notes:

The line “clarity of purpose” comes from Saw Gerrera in the Andor TV show

I wrote Sabé’s line before seeing that one similar was used in one of the books. Good to know I was on the right track with a character I know very little about lol

[novelmonger]

So I'm a pretty big LotR fan. And I'm a pretty big fan of the movies. No, they're not perfect, but they're a really good adaptation and a truly masterful work of cinematic art. I've grown pretty familiar with the movies over the past 23 years (@_@) - and not just the movies themselves, but I also love learning all about how they were made. I've watched all the way through all the bonus material in the Extended Editions at least five times (and some of the more fun bits way more times than that XD). I've even watched all three movies with the cast commentary.

But you know what I've never done, not even at the height of my obsession when I had way more free time than I do now? I've never watched the movies with the other commentaries. It looks like there are three more commentaries, with different groups of various people on the crew, and for some reason I never got around to listening through them. I can't for the life of me think why - maybe I thought I already knew everything they'd talk about? maybe I somehow thought it would be boring??? - but today that changes!

I'm going to just jot down the main things that stick out to me that I didn't know before. I've gleaned a lot of BTS information and stories about these movies from various sources, so I'm not sure how long this will be, but I'm sure there will be some new things that jump out at me.

From the FotR writer/director commentary with Peter Jackson, Philippa Boyens, and Fran Walsh:

There was a draft of the script where they didn't have a prologue, and all the information about Sauron and the Ring and Gollum and everything was going to be in that conversation between Frodo and Gandalf @_@ Can you imagine? I mean, yeah, it would be more like the book, but At What Cost? (At the cost of several memes and short attention spans, that's what.)

Peter Jackson says he doesn't like magic or wizards in movies. Um...sir? Why the heck are you making fantasy movies then???

The location where they shot the Ford of Bruinen was a real ford that was used during the gold rush in New Zealand! Because New Zealand had a gold rush around the same time as the one in the U.S.!

Hugo Weaving actually did the voice of Isildur when he claims the Ring and says, "No." I have...questions.

Peter Jackson says the journey through Moria is the best sequence in the book, and Fran and Philippa say it's the best-written chapter. Interesting! I don't know what I would point to as the best-written chapter of FotR; I don't think I've ever thought of that (though I might say some of the best descriptions in this book are in Rivendell).

They said they might redo the Gollum scene in Moria to make him look more like he does in TTT. Uhhh...it's been 23 years, guys, where's my remaster? XD

The Frodo-Gandalf conversation in Moria (the "all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us" conversation) was done with forced perspective??? I never realized that! I thought they just had Elijah sit a little lower than Ian so their eyelines would be right! They totally look like they're looking into each other's eyes, but they're not! :O

"Often in movies, that's a rare thing, to have shots in which nothing is real." - Oh, PJ, if you only knew what the state of things would be in two decades....

The scene of the Fellowship mourning Gandalf outside Moria was filmed before Ian McKellan had even arrived in New Zealand! :O So they were all mourning and reacting to the death of someone they probably weren't even sure what he looked like yet!

Sean Bean was apparently the only one of the primary actors who had any experience with a sword? Or at least he had the most experience. Viggo had to do the Weathertop fight scene on his first day, when he'd never touched a sword before @_@

In Boromir's death scene, the words sung by the chorus in the background is an Elvish translation of Faramir's line "I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend." ;A;

At one point, they were going to have Frodo fighting off an Uruk-Hai before he goes into the boat??? They even shot some of the footage?! Thankfully, they realized that was completely the wrong way to go about his end to this movie; it needed to be an emotional climax, not an action scene, and Frodo's victory is over his own doubts and the Ring's influence on him, when he grasps the Ring and marches forward to continue on his Quest, alone if need be. Thank goodness they realized that before it was too late.

SEAN ASTIN WAS NOT UNDERWATER IN THE SHOT OF HIM DROWNING WHAAAAAT MIND BLOWN

The shot of Boromir's boat going over the edge of the waterfall was actually footage of a barrel going over the Niagara Falls, and they just used CG to replace the barrel with the boat O.O

Fran Walsh: So Viggo's just put on Boromir's gauntlets... Me, a nerd: Vambraces, actually.

[borom1r]

1, 8, 17, 18, 20, 41, 45, 54, 93 for the non-fandom asks, 1, 3, 5-7, 12, 18-22, 24 for the fandom asks 🫡👀

THIS HAS BEEN IN MY INBOX FOR SO LONG + I ANSWERED IT IB MY NOTES AND JUST FUCKING FORGOT TO POST IT AAAAAAAAAAAAA

1. whats your favorite thing in your room?

plush boromir:3 hes so Shaped

8. favorite coping mechanism?

uuuuuuuuuuu noise cancelling headphones + loud music

17. do you want any tattoos? if so, where, what, and why?

YES. I want to get one on my upper arm — there’s an artist I really like who’s done free-to-use art + im going to get a piece of his tattooed w/ kennings for Óðinn and Þórr above + below

18. whats the most prominent dream youve had?

I still vividly remember this dream I had in high school where my alarm for school went off, I got up and went to start making myself toast and fucking. Michael Myers walks up from the basement (the garage door/basement stairs were just off the kitchen) + we stared at each other and my only thought before my Actual alarm went off was “damn, guess I better make more toast”

20. whats your ideal date?

REN FEST!!!!!!! unironically my local fest hosts weddings and I would. really really like to get married there in full armor. even if it’s just for tax benefits smjfjdjjfjdj

41. if you could announce one thing to the world what would it be?

WOOFWOOFWOOFWOOFWOOFWOOF!!!!!!

45. do you prefer book over movie?

depends :3 ummmm a lot of times I think there are pros n cons to both mediums. sometimes I love a movie but also think the book is WAY better even if the movie is a masterpiece in its own right (a clockwork orange… cutting off the original ending to the book completely fucks the point of the story I think. I adore that movie but if you’ve never read the book…. 😑)

54. whats your best hottake?

my BEST????? idfk dude. my CURRENT hot take is that the changes the made to Faramir’s character for the movie were Good, Actually

93. whats your favorite item of clothing?

wolf hat :3 AND my leather jacket w all my patches

1. What is the first fandom you were ever a part of?

uuuuu like active online a part of… probs like. idek dude probably the fucking Warriors (1979 movie not cat books)

3. All-time favorite pairing?

I’m a spangel truther and I have been since middle school, so ig that

5. Favorite platonic pairing?

big fan of Boromir&Éowyn like obvs Boromir&Faramir + Théodred&Éomer&Éowyn bc they are Family but if we’re talking non-blood relations then I think Boromir&Éowyn is an excellent platonic pairing

6. Favorite headcanon?

I’ve almost called Boromir a faggot multiple times on instinct, so that. also transgender Faramir (what direction? you decide. they contain multitudes < I personally adore a he/they/te transmasc. I think te and Aragorn should both be allowed to use Sindarin pronouns. get funky with it)

7. Least favorite headcanon?

HRM. there are SOME utterly rancid takes from my SAW fandom days that I still think abt. evil. I shan’t speak of those times in public.

12. Craziest thing you've ever done as part of a fandom?

uh. idk?? I used to run a rlly popular ask blog for the characters of The Warriors (1979) that I believe is still out there?? lmao ok yea it is i just checked. that’s so funny that it’s still out there actually snfksjfjjs

18. All-time favorite fanfic?

that I’ve READ or that I’ve WRITTEN????

to read, literally anything Connor @angeltrapz has written but I’ll specifically drop this Princess Bride fic💗 https://archiveofourown.org/works/41272767?view_adult=true (TUMBLR WONT LET ME ACTUALLY LINK THE FIC EVIL AND HATEFUL. I can paste it + it generates a link tho. functioning fucking app)

fav that I’ve written…. highkey this one

19. Fanfic you read again and again?

other people’s fics?? this whole series: https://archiveofourown.org/series/183362

my own fics? literally any of my Faramir/Éomer fics that pairing is so fun

20. All-time favorite fanfic author?

CONNOR ANGELTRAPZ MY BESTIE!!!!!!!! also YOU duh????? ik it’s not fanfic Technically but like. BOY the rp is. creative project of all time perhaps?

21. Favorite fic trope?

i am a weak bitch for a good soulmate au. esp when there’s like. drama. im not exposing myself just know i think abt soulmate aus A Lot. < can u tell this has been sitting in my notes for A While lmfao

22. Least favorite fic trope?

idek???? I think any trope can be Done Well like I don’t normally enjoy chatfics but I’ve also read. some really good chatfics!! write what u love who cares

24. Funniest fandom-related story?

I’m gonna be so real w u I got into drama w a Lost Boys fandom mogul bc I was. A Homosexual and A Kinnie and they were NOT happy abt the fact I was like “yea all the lost boys are fucking.” I didn’t even know what to say abt that really. take it up w famously gay director Joel Schumacher if you don’t like me. A NOTORIOUS FAGGOT. going “yea I think these characters in a film directed by a gay man are gay”

this exact situation has happened to me 3 times across various fandoms. <- is just trying to sit in my little kinnie corner + be a weird fag in peace

[derangedchameleon]

I was given… oppertunity… I have not very many thoughts right now I put my brain under mild strain (made it do uni work) and now I can’t think. So prepare for some incoherence…

(adding on here, I occasionally go on rants about other characters here (Gandalf). This was all very much written without plan)

BUT

Boromir

I don’t remember if he has all these little attributes in the books, I’m rereading them for the first time in a long time, so this will be focusing on movie Boromir.

Just… the way he’s the hobbits’ biggest advocate. When I saw the movies when I was younger I looked at him so critically. I interpreted him going “This will be the death of the hobbits.” when they were walking up Caradras (the big ass snowy mountain where Saruman attacks them from long distanced), as a manipulative way to just get them down from the mountain and have them go past Rohan, since that would be a more direct route of getting the Ring to Gondor (his home city).

I don’t think that’s the case anymore… Why was Boromir the only one noticing that these 3 foot something buddies are walking barefoot (hobbit barefoot but STILL) through at least 5 feet of snow? Everyone else is juts following Gandalf blindly, who really doesn’t wanna go through Moria (which is really their only other option). This is somewhat of a failing on Gandalf’s part to be honest. He loves his hobbits so much, yet it’s Boromir who sees them struggeling and who speaks up for them.

Boromir has known of hobbits’ existence for all but a few weeks and he’s already watching out for them better than Gandalf, the guys who’s been hanging out with hobbits for probably centuries (this is not meant to bash Gandalf, buddy’s doing the best he can but BOROMIR (also why would you put the choice to go through Moria on Frodo when you know what’s probably gonna happen down there? Gandalf why?)) Boromir has adopted all the hobbits. Yes.

I believe 100% this is a side effect of him being an older brother. He must protecc.

Also his relationship with Merry and Pippin!!! I know we only see him giving them sword fighting lessons once but I like to believe this was a regular thing. He was their bestest older bro.

But also his gentleness with Frodo? He sees that Frodo is blaming himself for Gandalf’s death. No one else, not even Sam as far as we know, read that in the guy. Boromir’s been through a lot of war, no doubt people have died perceivably due to his decisions as a leader of his people. He gets it. Or maybe he’s consoled Faramir in this way when Faramir lost Osgiliath the first time. He would have told Faramir that he made the best decisions with the information he had available, which is exactly what Frodo did.

I feel like Boromir is the most empathetic of the entire group, towards everyone. (Sam’s empathy is very Frodo focused, we’ve seen clearly with Smeagol that he doesn’t easily extend this empathy to others)

Also the way Boromir begs Aragorn to give the hobbits a second to grieve after Gandalf falls. Of course I’m not angry at Aragorn for switching off his feelings and making sure the group doesn’t get killed, but Boromir here is trying to take care of the group’s mental needs. He’s emotionally affected by Gandalf’s death, but I think primarily he’s worried about how it’s affecting everyone else and ge feels THEIR pain.

hdsidnfofn

How did a kiddo, who has been favored by his dad his entire life turn out this gentle? This caring?

And I think it’s that caring that the Ring latched on and twisted. Boromir doesn’t want the ring for power. He’s TERRIFIED. His entire life he’s been fighting a seemingly insurmountable army right next to his home city’s doors. He cares deeply for his people. I believe every death affects this man. And they are dying. And his father sent him on a mission, far away from those people he wants to protect, on a mission that Boromir knows his brother would be better suited for because his father for some reason has decided that his little brother is good for literally nothing.

He wants to bring this Ring back to get back to his people. He wants to save everyone. He wants to stop all the death.

Even as the Ring is taking him Boromir mentions seeing how the Ring is causing Frodo to suffer. There is probably some attempt at manipulation in there but I think this definately comes from genuine concern. In his eyes, this completely hopeless quest is going to get this innocent little guy messed up and eventually tortured to death. This little guy that really shouldn’t be here. That should be back in the Shire. The Shire that has remained untouched for so long, in part, because Gondor is holding Mordor back.

He just sounds so broken after realising he attacked Frodo. This man needs a hug.

And he dies protecting the innocent. He dies doing what he’s done his entire life.

I like to imagine his ghost just hanging around Faramir after he died… And just… panicking when seeing Faramir take Frodo prisoner. I believe the Ring taking Boromir was a huge wake up call for him, and I believe had he survived he would have wanted to do anything in his power to prevent the Ring from getting back to Gondor and corrupting everything and everyone he loves. He now knows what the thing does to the most well intentioned of people, and he does not want that to happen to his little brother.

Anyway. I feel like Boromir is the most human (no pun intended) character in all of LOTR. And yeah. I’m done now. Guess I ended up having more thoughts than I thought I would, huh?

Feeling pretty miserable feel free to yap abt your faves under this post 👍 I need to see some people be happy about their blorbos

[fangirl-erdariel]

I know I talk every now and then about all the changes that the LOTR trilogy did that I wish they hadn't and that make me froth at the mouth. So I thought, for a change, I'd talk about something in the books that I, personally, would alter if I got to make an adaptation of LOTR. (Now, this is pretending that I'd basically have infinite time to put everything I want into it and wouldn't have to concern myself with how to get it into a given timeframe. But I do think that you could probably get this to fit even into something limited like a movie trilogy if you wanted to and were clever about it)

I would make Boromir talk about Faramir and Denethor more. In the books, iirc he only really brings them up during the Council of Elrond, as he explains who he is and what he's doing in Rivendell, and I'm not actually 100% certain if he mentions Faramir by name or if he refers to him only as his brother. Beyond that, as far as I remember, he really pretty much just talks about Gondor as a country and its people in general, not really Faramir or Denethor specifically. At least with Faramir, it's kinda understandable, since I know a lot of LOTR kinda evolved and developed as it was being written, and iirc Faramir specifically was a character who wasn't originally intended to really be there or have such a prominent role as he did, he just sort of appeared as Tolkien was writing the Ithilien bit of The Two Towers. But for anyone now, anyone who makes an adaptation of LOTR, the book has been written, we know what's going to happen and which characters exist in it.

And I just feel like, it's not a big thing, but it would probably be good for an adaptation if Boromir talked about his family a bit. It doesn't even need to be that much and the details he tells about don't need to be that important or that relevant to the plot, but you could easily add in a few scenes here and there during the travel sequences where they're like, idk, just camped somewhere and talking about random stuff, and Boromir just mentions them. Like the scene begins as Aragorn is finishing telling some story about the First Age or whatever and Boromir just says that he'd get along well with Faramir, Faramir is also interested in old legends and history. Another scene, he talks a little about how Denethor rules Gondor, or his approach to military strategy, or something.

It doesn't need to be much, it could be just like three or four brief scattered scenes besides the necessary background and exposition at the Council of Elrond. Just enough to establish that these are people Boromir really cares about. He wants to make his father proud, he knows how heavy the long war has made the burden of leadership his father carries and he wants to ease that, or at least help carry his share of it. He worries about Faramir because sure, Faramir is a capable man, but he's also his little brother and war is dangerous and chaotic and anything could happen and he wants his little brother to be safe and happy. He cares about his family, he loves his family, and he wants to get back to them as soon as he can, preferably with something, be it wisdom, or weapon, or allies in war, that will help Gondor stand against Mordor, but even if that's not possible, what he really, really wants is to just get back to his family, to help his family and keep them safe.

You could, and you should, still also keep in there the talk about Gondor as a realm and its people. Those should still be important to him. But I feel like alongside that, you should add more strongly and clearly there the fact that he has a family and he cares about them a lot.

Partially because while the safety of a realm is a very noble goal and all, it's also kind of very abstract thing (at least to me, but I'd think I'm not the only one). An entire nation is a very big concept and kind of hard to grasp in a concrete way. But family, or like even in a more general way individual people that you really, really care about? That's familiar to most people, I think. Almost anyone probably has at least one other person that they'd be willing to go to really great lengths to help, whose safety and happiness they'd be willing to sacrifice a lot for.

So I think that would also make the temptation of the Ring somewhat easier to grasp, it would give a face to what he's afraid of losing. With the Ring, not only can he ensure Gondor's victory against Mordor, but also the safety of his family. With the Ring, once they've won, he can help his father ensure peace and order and security in every corner of the realm, even the distant borderlands. He can help his father, he can take on more responsibility than he did before, more of the burden and trouble he's watched his father carry for such a long time. And he can make sure Faramir is safe and happy, he can give Faramir whatever he needs or wants from his life, right? Without the Ring, he can't ensure they'll win the war, but even if Frodo's quest by some miracle succeeds, even if they win and Sauron falls and Gondor is saved, which is such a frighteningly slim chance already, how can he really be sure the people he cares about will survive? How could he protect them, really? Especially Faramir, who he knows is out there fighting? Just one hit from a sword in the right place, just one stray arrow, just one blow of a mace is enough to kill a man, and war is chaotic. It doesn't even need to be aimed at Faramir as an officer specifically, though it certainly might be, it could be just blindly hitting whoever happens to be there. It could happen so easily. It wouldn't be an irrational thing to fear, that Faramir might die in battle even if the war itself was eventually won.

Like, sure, even as it is, I can understand why Boromir is tempted by the Ring. I can understand his worry and fear. But the understanding is on this sort of a very abstract level, like I understand why he does what he does, and it is tragic, sure, but it's like... it's just a little too big. Sometimes it's a good idea to scale things down a little, to take individual characters and make a character's worry for them the sort of face of their worry about a bigger, more abstract concept. Like it would just make the tragedy hit harder for me if the story emphasized more the fact that there are also these specific people Boromir really cares about deeply, these are the people he wants to keep safe at any cost.

Besides that, another reason why I think Boromir bringing Faramir and Denethor up a few times more in the story is that that would establish them as characters to the audience and create certain expectations beforehand that you could then use to build on once we meet them later on in the story. They don't need to be 100% in line with what the audience sees, either, you can make Boromir's perception of them different than the way you present them to the audience, if that's something you wanna do. And in fact I feel like it might be one way to help bring more nuance into Denethor's character - something that I feel the PJ trilogy really doesn't have, but there are other posts about it that articulate it better than I could, so I won't go into detail on that yet - and giving us an idea of who Denethor was before grief and despair and Sauron's manipulation started really getting into him.

But yeah, just. This is one of the things that I would actually change from the books if I could make my ideal dream adaptation of LOTR. Just have Boromir talk about his family on screen a little bit more.

[notanightlight]

also okay, whenever you have time: in lieu of a star, because it's me...Wild West AU? *eyes emoji*

*cracks knuckles* saddle up, here is the directors cut to the Wild West AU.

So first off, I really don’t remember how it first came to my head. I never watched a lot of westerns growing up. The only significant “western” movies I can remember are “An American Tale: Fievel Goes West,” and “Shanghai Noon”. That said, I certainly read several book series that took place in the Wild West, on ranches, or on the frontier. I also was very interested in Annie Oakley.

I just remember the idea of Legolas’s improbable aiming translating over to the idea of a nigh mythical sharpshooter just resonated with me.

I also felt a lot of the immigrant story with Gimli was very fitting. Especially the Irish immigrants. I know there are other cultures even more strongly tied to the culture of the Dwarves, but the Irish resonated with me because of my family’s history. A good deal of my family were Irish immigrants, and I’ve been tracing back their history. There was even one of my grandfathers so many greats back that we realized was an Irishman, when we had never thought so before. We always thought he was German, until we found his trail and realized that he had changed the spelling of his Last name to a similar German name, moved to a new city, married a German woman, and passed himself off as German. That tells you something.

I wanted to highlight some of the more romanticized parts of the Wild West outlaw gang (because it turns out it’s a fun sandbox to play in), and highlight how people who are outcasts could find community and family together. I also wanted to play with some of the aspects of the west that get overlooked with the image that is most known. I wanted to make a point not only of our two main fellas falling in love, but how colorful the West was too, in terms of people involved.

The plot of the first story stands for itself. I just really wanted a high action, comedic, dramatic “meet cute” as it were (and now I really want someone to make a list of prompts for Action Meet Cutes).

So let’s get into the cast! I’ll happily reveal some of their backstories, since I don’t know that I’d be able to fit it all in in the sequel.

Gimli; an Irish immigrant who came to the US in search for opportunity as a teenager. He hasn’t had an easy time of it, owing greatly to his hard it’s been for him to find and keep a job. People don’t want to hire the Irish for anything but the lowest paid and toughest of jobs. Landing the job as the fireman for the engine is the best one he’d had actually, until the outlaw gig presented himself. He still hasn’t told his Ma, even though he writes to her whenever he can.

Legolas “Legs”; is a legendary sharpshooter and outlaw. It’s alluded to in the story, but never fully stated in what’s been written so far, but Legolas is mixed race. Part Native American, and Part European. I don’t go into as much detail in these aspects, because it would be rather uninformed, despite what research I can do. Still I felt it was important to his character. I can say that he can feel as though he doesn’t really belong with either side of his family, and like he’s always too much of the other side to really fit in. It’s part of why the gang means so much to him. He fits in there.

Aragorn; has a mysterious past. Because it’s Aragorn. When doesn’t he? I won’t reveal all of that, just know that his grandfather fell from grace. I also wanted to make it clear that Aragorn has dark skin in this story. Again, the Wild West was colorful.

Boromir “Beau”; was a bugler for the Union during the civil war. He’s came back jaded. Proud of what he accomplished, but definitely scarred as well.

Faramir; is Boromir’s younger brother, he was supposed to go to school to become a chemist and start work at a pharmacy. But his father cut him off. When Boromir decided to strike out on his own, he decided to come with him. Aside from the bit of medical knowledge he has, both he and Boromir are responsible for handling any explosives the gang may use.

The Hobbits are all Italian immigrants. I’m giving them one bullet point because they are very much intertwined. Frodo was sent to the US to join his uncle Bilbo, who had immigrated before and opened a shop. Frodo was a very bright student with a gift for languages, so he learned English well before he took the trip. His cousin’s Merry and Pippin ended up joining him last minute to avoid some trouble they’d gotten into at home in Italy. They will not divulge what trouble that was. They spoke enough English to make it through immigration, and understand it fairly well, although neither speaks it very much. Pippin speaks a bit more than Merry. Sam actually did not meet the others until they were on the boat. He did not speak or understand any English whatsoever, and upon learning that he needed some to make it through immigration, was in despair. Frodo noticed, befriended Sam, and spent the whole trip tutoring Sam in specifically what he’d need to get through immigration, and English in general. He’s devoted to Frodo because of this and swore to help him in return. He remains the best cook you’ll ever meet. Upon arriving to the US, they find that Bilbo’s shop is closed. Apparently some strange folk who were heading west with the hopes of finding gold and a new life (the cast of the hobbit) somehow convinced them to go with them. Frodo and the others ended up heading west in hopes of someday finding Uncle Bilbo. They ran into the gang along the way and somehow ended up joining it.

One thing that was important to me from the beginning, was getting the voices right. I wanted to get the dialects to sounds right without writing accents too phonetically. It’s an interesting line to find.

The town that Eowyn is leading them to is called Dreadwood, as a play on the city of Deadwood, and the literal name of one of the places in middle earth.

I can’t think of what else to say other than that! I hope you enjoyed!

[schrijverr]

Lay Your Burdens Down

An introspection of Boromir’s mind during the quest. How he was fulfilling a role that was not written for him and how it became his downfall.

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: Boromir's relation with the Ring

~~~~~~~~~

Boromir carried burdens he was not meant to carry.

He had traveled far, aching bones and dirty hands to ask for counsel that might not be enough to save Gondor. His beautiful Gondor for which he would give his life, if it meant that the White City should prevail.

It was a feeble hope, but it was the only hope he had. For all other hope had long forsaken Minas Tirith as it lay in the Mountain’s shadow under ever growing darkness.

His father could not hold out for long. Soon the people of Gondor’s doubt, their questions if he knew what he was doing, if he was doing enough to save their land, would lead to discontent that showed in actions, rather than whispered murmurs.

Still, Boromir tried to fight both that darkness growing in the East and amongst his people. He fought bravely out on the field, commanded his men with compassion and took to the streets to help where it was needed.

The Son of Gondor was there, the people knew.

And now the Son of Gondor was away. He had been traveling for a hundred and ten days when he finally arrived and he would have to make the return journey as well.

He felt every day, every minute, heavily in his soul. He knew that this was time he could not waste, because who would pick up his role while he was gone? Who would keep the darkness at bay and that little flicker of hope burning bright?

His soul knew that Faramir would try in his stead, but the people whispered that he was a Wizard’s pupil. That he did not care for his City and carried out rituals in the dark.

Naturally his own soldiers knew this not to be true and no one dared to say a word when Boromir was there to protect his little brother’s honor, but Boromir couldn't always be there and the longer he was gone, the more distrust would fester.

He shouldn’t be here, shouldn't be riding to an Elven city when there was so much he had to do at home, so much to defend.

They had only just reclaimed Osgiliath and he was certain the Dark Lord wished to retake the Gondor city that controlled the Anduin. It was only a matter of time and he should be there to talk strategy so that it wouldn’t come to pass.

It was all too much for one person to bear. Fighting on too many fronts, in both a physical war as well as a war of trust. He was not build for this, he wasn’t the one who could fight both and win, yet he had to try.

He did not know anything else.

His life had always been this war, ever since he was a child and first held Faramir and his mother made his swear to protect his little brother, ever since he remembered that first oath he ever took while they had to hide as their father fought of a group of Orcswhile they had been out riding in the forest.

So, he kept on going. For while it might be too much, might completely hopeless, might be foolish to try and might not even be his destiny, he had to do it. Because who else would step up in his stead if he ever fell down?

Thus he found himself in Rivendell asking for counsel, surrounded by people who seemed much surer of themselves and more comfortable with the danger that lay far from their borders.

The counsel revealed much to him. Not only was the riddle that had plagued both his dreams as those of Faramir explained, but there was hope again. There was a weapon, a thing to turn the tide of this hopeless war and an heir. Someone to ease Boromir’s burden and help to rally the troops and take up arms against the might of Mordor.

Though he could not convince the counsel that Gondor needed the weapon, he was able to convince them to tie his own faith to that of the Ring and take a place on the Fellowship.

He knew there were people wiser than him, many people were and he had long learned that. He was a warrior, not a philosopher. So, he was content to follow both the words of the wise as well as his King. To do what they deemed to be the best course of action to save Middle Earth and with that Gondor.

However, as the journey processed a dark voice started to prod at the hope that had finally managed to bloom.

It spoke to him of the fall of Gondor while he was gone, urging him to return before it was too late, even though it already was. Telling him how he would come back to the White City being overrun and no strength he had in him could turn the tide. It offered him a solution to the problems that had plagued his mind since his youth and grew as he did.

Still, he tried to tell himself that the voice was his darkest fears and that, while they were founded in reality, were not true and merely an extreme. He looked to Aragorn and chided himself for not believing in the prophesied return, for doubting his King.

But it was hard to trust in his King when it seemed his King did not want to be what he was destined to be. When he clung to being a Ranger, keeping close to the Elf that he treated as if he were his kin. When he did not want to listen to Boromir when the soldier attempted to talk about Minas Tirith and the struggles of Gondor.

The burdens that he had carried around all his life made the journey with him towards Mordor, staying in his heart, lowering his shoulders, while no one ever looked his way to ease them, for it was the burdens of his home and no one seemed to care about them.

And so the voice crept back into his mind, its words sounding more tempting and reasonable every time.

A small part of his mind told him that it was the Ring, but a bigger part argued that it did not matter how the thought first came to be, for it was the only viable answer.

He would have to go back to Gondor, he couldn't linger here. He couldn't waste his time on this quest, which was not only folly, but would prove to be their doom, no matter the outcome. They did not know if destroying the Ring would destroy Sauron’s forces and Minas Tirith could still be overrun by his army. But, the voice whispered, they do no care for Minas Tirith, so why would consider that outcome?

It was eating at him and he saw the others look at him with suspicion. He knew they did not trust him and he resented them for their distrust, for they were safe in their countries and his people were the ones dying, yet still they did not see why he wanted the Ring to go to Gondor.

The more their gazes hardened when the passed him, the harder it came to fight with the reasoning of his mind that seemed like his own, until he wondered why he was arguing it.

Then Mithrandir fell. The Wizard was plunged into the deep where no one returned from and the small chance they had of success died with him. It disappearedover the ridge and while they pushed on, it was not the same.

Boromir watched with resentment as Aragorn stood up as leader, his mind wondering why he was willing to lead this Fellowship, while abandoning his people. The resentment grew when he lead to them Lothlórien, an Elven city once more.

Aragorn did not care for the men of Gondor, he was faithful to the Elves and did not want to take the crown. He did not want to fight for Gondor and Boromir was alone as always, but this time he was far removed from home and he could not fight from here.

He had abandoned his home, his people. The realization hit him as a voice spoke in his mind about the fall of Gondor, confirming it had not just been his own fears, but even the Elves knew of the impending doom, hanging over the White City.

She also told him to have hope, but hope had long since perished in Minas Tirith. He’dhad hope, a long while ago and he thought he could have hope when he met Aragorn, but he now saw that the hope was misplaced. The Elves didn’t understand what he had to do. They thought themselves so wise, but they were not. They were blind.

He knew what he had to do.

The solution seemed so easy. He had already said that the hands of a Halfling were not safe and he could prove it by reaching out his hand. The others would have to understand. It was the only choice he had.

It was only after he had attempted to find his salvation that he realized that it had been him, who had been folly to think he could wield it, that it was his own mind that made him think that this was the answer.

But it was too late now and he could not take back what he had done. He could not undo the confirmation of proving that their mistrust in him was just. He had failed them all and he had been too blind to see.

Still, he tried to prove himself worthy of the burden of the protecting the Ring that had been placed on his shoulders by the Counsel.

He tried to protect the little ones, tried to follow the ordersof his King and see it through to the end, no matter if it would mean that his own life would be forfeit. He had risked his life plenty of times before and he would not see two people as joyful as Merry ad Pippin succumb to the horrors of war that had been his reality from birth.

When he fell, he knew he had failed once more. Merry and Pippin were being carried away and he did not know what had become of the others, if Frodo was safe.

And when Aragorn comforted him, he scarcely believed his King when he told him he did enough, that he had kept his honor. He tried in his final moments to live up what his King thought of him, he confessed what he had done and made sure that Aragorn knew that he would have followed him if had been able.

Boromir carriedburdenshe was not meant to carry for his entire life and as he finally closed his eyes, that burden eased from his shoulders and wrapped around Aragorns shoulders like a heavymantle.

The King had to return and take up the burdens meant for him.

~~

A/N:

I love everyone in the Fellowship and anything negative in here abt them is Boromir’s mind under the influence of the Ring

Also this was a mix between book and movie verse

[elfy-elf-imagines]

Rewrite the Stars | Haldir

Pairing: Haldir x reader

Genre: angst; fluff at the end

Warnings: talks of death; war

Requested: N/A

Prompt: - 

Words: 3,604

Note: If you’d like to be added to a tag list for any of my works, there’s a link on my page 💕 I hope you all enjoy this one, it was a real treat to write! ♡

                                                     o0o0o0o

Your body felt like it was on fire. 

Like there was a flame slowly traveling up your body, burning anything it touches, only leaving behind ashes. It moves slowly, painstakingly slow, drawing out each agonizing moment just a second too long. Each time you’d attempt to will it away it would persist, despite the rain drenching you and everyone else. Every breath sounded like you were screaming into an endless void that drowned out every other sense as you gripped your longsword tightly. Your eyelashes tickled the tops of your cheeks, faintly caressing them each time you’d blink; the gentle touch a stark contrast to the stifling fear you were drowning in. You’d been tip toeing around this moment, forcing the thoughts and worries out of your brain. An attempt to deal with it another day, or perhaps never have to deal with it. But that’s not how time works, so here you and everyone are, dealing with it. 

The army of orcs marched towards Helm’s Deep, their burning torches only minorly flickering in the rain. The Uruk Hai general let out a guttural yell, the sound sending a chill down your spine. It raised the hairs on the back of your neck and formed goosebumps across any exposed skin. The beasts in full plate began chanting, the animalistic noice grating to your ears as they beat their spears into the ground. The pain in your head was nearly unbearable, their offbeat chants clashed against one another. Not that you expected orcs to be in perfect tune with each other. The only solace you found was the blade in your hand. The grip on it was so tight you couldn’t feel anything in that arm, causing you to glance at it to ensure the limb was even still attached. 

And has a man’s arrow he had knocked loosened, piercing into one of the orcs, everything stopped. The orcs silenced immediately, both sides watching bewildered for a moment. Your ability to breath stopped altogether. The battle was inevitable, you knew that, but that didn’t mean you didn’t want to prolong it. But that was no longer an option when the orcs began to scream, the noise more unnerving than their initial war chants. 

And then they were running. The sea of orcs rushing towards the wall like cockroaches skittering from the light. Except these cockroaches were terrifying; donning full plate armor and wielding deadly weapons they would gladly use to butcher you. Aragorn shouts out a command to the elven archers, moving them into action immediately. Your eyes briefly land on Haldir, the Marchwarden a mere three people away from you. A bigger pit settled in your stomach and your eyes moved to scan the rest of the elven army. 

He’s going to die; they’re all going to die.

And the dread must’ve shown on your face, because for a miniscule of a second, Haldir met your gaze. His expression asked a million questions as his eyes narrowed ever so slightly. But before you can do a thing, he’s firing another arrow at the orcs, gaze long gone from your form. A flurry of arrows fire from behind you on the ground level, soaring high above your head as they pierced into the approaching force. A moment too soon, they’ve descended upon you, clinging to crudely made ladders that find purchase against the stone. 

For a brief moment they appeared more like a group of monkeys hanging off a tree rather than the grotesque beasts they were, but the humor was swiftly wiped from your mind when a large Uruk Hai charged you. You managed to dodge his attack, not attempting to parry from previous experiences. Instead you nimbly rolled towards his blind spot and stuck your blade deep into his skin. But as soon as he fell, another took his place, and then another, and then another.

And as your sword slices through the neck of an orc, you catch one last glimpse at Haldir as he disappears in the swarm of bodies. You wanted to chase after Haldir, to scream what awaited him in a few hours, that his death was written into the stars. Yell at him that the gods intend for him to be slaughtered by these beasts as he watched the warriors under his command fall as well. And for a moment you almost did. You almost ran towards him so you could drag him away from the battlefield, no matter how much he fought against you. 

But you never got the chance, because a new orc quickly replaced the one you’d dispatched. And before you knew it you were pulled into the fray of battle, survival the only thing in mind. 

                                         ~~~~~~~~~~                           

The fight was grueling. Everywhere you looked, orcs seemed to drown out the rest of the soldiers. There wasn’t a moment to breathe, because as soon as one orc was killed four would take its place. Blood and ichor coated your once pristine and glowing armor, the stickiness of it attracting dirt and other substances with textures you didn’t want to think about. It didn’t take long for the orcs to blow up a portion of the wall, allowing them to scamper into the keep like a swarm of rats. 

A part of you wanted to cry. To disappear into the keep and hide with the women and children, like a dog with it’s tail tucked between it’s legs. The screams of pain surrounding you dulled your senses as you fought a losing battle. You could differentiate the men of Rohan from the elves of the Lorien; the mentisulusly crafted armor of the elves a beacon of light in a sea of crude iron armor coating the orcs or the poorly fitted chain the Rohan’s donned. It allowed you to easily see when they were being cut down like animals by the Uruk Hai. 

Gandalf would come with the dawn, you knew that, but each second ticked by as if it was a century. You wondered if you’d even make it to dawn as the number of soldiers around you dwindled. But as quickly as these thoughts surfaced you banished them, unable to get lost in your mind while war waged around you. 

So you fought. You moved through the battle with a vigor you didn’t know you had. Your sword moved in sync with your every movement; parrying each attack that came close to you, gifting the assaulting orcs with your blade. And it was… invigorating; fulfilling something inside you that felt pleasure with each enemy you fell. It should’ve scared you and maybe it would later, but now you could only focus on your blood pumping with adrenaline and the yells around you. Smoke filled your lungs, the flames remnants of the multitude of explosions the orcs caused in order to breach the keep. No longer were you the scared girl you were when the Fellowship found you in the woods. You were a warrior as you moved around the battlefield like it was a dance. 

Aragorn’s shouts sounded from behind you, despite speaking hardly any Sindarin, you knew what he was saying, you’d watched the movies too much to not know. A retreat, he was calling for the forces to retreat. This grabbed your attention, your head swinging to look back as you shoved your sword through an orc. A glimpse of silver and red pulled your attention to Haldir, who nodded at Aragorn and started to move back, but continued slicing at any incoming enemies. 

That was when you froze, like a sudden winter storm descended upon you and locked your limbs in place. This was it, this was the scene; the moment Haldir died in the movies. But this isn’t a movie, he was going to die in real life, right before your eyes. Dread and panic surged through you as the color immediately drained from your face.

“No. No. No. No!” the words repeat in your mind, each one more desperate than the last.

But you couldn’t move, unable to even bring yourself to blink as you watched the event unfold. The air stung your eyes as they continued to lose moisture and your mouth turned drier than the desert. The grip on your sword slackened, just enough for it to nearly clatter to the dirt if not for your stiff fingers that acted as a hook. Like a war drum, your heartbeat pounded viciously against your chest, commanding your body into action. But nothing happened as your mind fell blank. An orc came behind Haldir, hitting him with a powerful blow, painful enough to cause the elf to stagger. His delicate elven features that never displayed anything other than passiveness mimicked the fear staining your own.

He’s going to die. He’s going to die in front of you just like Boromir did. 

And at that moment, it was like the spell that held you broke as the memories of Boromir resurfaced. Phantom tears that you shed for Boromir fell down your face, your body reacting before your mind caught up. You were running, completely disregarding the orcs that were surrounding you. They hit you with their blades and pierced crossbow bolts into your flesh, but you didn’t care. The only thing on your mind in that moment was Haldir, unwilling to let him suffer the same fate as Boromir. 

Each footstep pounded into the Earth, leaving splotches of dirt and blood on your boots. Your breathing was heavy, not from exertion but instead the anxiety that bubbled inside of you. You watched as Haldir managed to slay the first orc that struck him, but you knew there would be more. And when the second one brought it’s blade up to strike him you’d managed to reach the steps leading up to the part of the wall he was atop. 

You screamed at the top of your lungs, or maybe you didn’t? It was hard to tell with the ringing in your ears that silenced any noise. Taking them two at a time, you rushed up the stairs. And by the time you managed to climb all of them, the orc swung at Haldir, causing the elf’s knees to buckle beneath him from the force of the blow. You screamed again, and this time you were sure the sound escaped your lungs. The timber of the scream closely resembled the wail of a banshee roaring in anger. 

The fleeing soldiers around you turned their gazes to you, but continued forward. The hulking orc that attacked Haldir shifted his attention to you, at least you think he did. It was hard to tell in the shroud of night. Haldir fell to the ground, but his eyes latched onto you, watching as you charged an orc more than twice your size. But you weren’t afraid, you didn’t have the time to feel fear.

One, two, three; in mere moments you closed the distance between yourself and the orc; bringing your sword up on your third step. You sliced into him, moving to the left as you avoided what would’ve been a devastating blow. He screamed in your face, the scent worse than rotting flesh on a hot summer day. But instead of hesitating, you steeled your gaze, eyes in slits as you brought your sword up for another swing. This time the blow slashed into the flesh between his shoulders and his arm that held his weapon. It fell limp against his side, a howl of pain leaving his mouth. Like a wild boar, he snorted at you and made a show of his sharpened teeth that jutted in all directions. He tossed the blade to his other hand and charged towards you with a roar. 

You stepped to the side but it wasn’t fast enough as his blade clipped your side. With a scream, you staggered forward and pressed your free hand against the wound. The sticky warm liquid slowly drips out of the wound, staining your skin crimson. The wound stings, the cold wind whipping around you only further agitating it. However, you are numb to the majority of the pain. The noise around you dampened, until all you can hear was the faint sounds of swords clanging against each other and your heavy heart beat. 

 On instinct, your sword slashed against the Uruk Hai’s exposed back before he could move out of the way. In the same fluid motion, you brought your sword up on a backswing. It sliced through his side and up his chest in a diagonal motion.With strength you didn’t normally possess, you pushed your sword deeper into his flesh, shoving the beast away from you. You ripped the sword out his skin, putrid smelly black ooz spewing from the wound. Before he could gather his footing you stalked towards him. Like an animal you barred your teeth, your eyes dancing with a blend of rage and bliss. 

In that moment you weren’t human, instead you were an otherworldly creature brutally striking down any enemies. You were like an angel of fire and death as you sliced into his thighs, an attempt to knock him prone. And it worked. The great beast fell to the ground with a loud thud, but still twitched as he attempted to grasp something to defend himself with. And just as his hand found purchase on the blade of a fallen soldier you grasped the hilt of your sword in both hands. In a swift motion, you brought the blade down and into the orcs neck. The flesh made a squelching noise as that same black ooze began pouring from the wound. 

Moving with the ferocious wind whipping around you, you moved back towards Haldir, falling to your knees as you gently cradled his head on your lap. With a shaky hand, you raised two fingers to his neck, desperate to feel a pulse. And you nearly cried when you felt the faint thump. He was alive, you managed to save him. But the battle wasn’t over yet, far from it in fact. So instead of breaking down into tears, you stood from the ground and lifted Haldir. You slung his arm over your shoulder as you made your retreat into the keep, longing for the stone walls to encapsulate you until Gandalf would come and save the day. 

The gods appeared to have other plans however, as a bolt stuck into your back. A strangled cry escaped your mouth, blood coming out of your mouth. Your legs turned to jelly as you slowly fell to your knees. Another bolt whizzes through the air, this time landing in your shoulder. The world grew hazy as fuzzy figures danced in your vision before everything turned black. Your body hit the ground with a trump, the sound muffled by the dozens of bodies littering the stone floor. 

                                            ~~~~~~~~~~  

The cold was the first thing you noticed. There was a cold breeze lightly caressing your body all over, soothing the burning that had blossomed in your body. And for a second you thought you were dead, you had to have been. After the wounds you’d sustained when trying to retreat with Haldir, there was no way you could’ve survived. Yet somehow this isn’t what you imagined death to feel like. You’d always envisioned it as something less painful and a bit more weightless. 

But the hard stone beneath the blanket you’re lying on and the distant pain shooting through your body cancels that out. Voices fill the void surrounding you; some are cries of pain from mourning lost loved ones, while a few cries of relief and joy mingle with the despair. Faintly you can hear the chatter of people, mindlessly talking about anything other than the war that just waged. But none of this alarms you. Instead it’s the elvish words being whispered near your ear, like a distant melody that’s just outside of your reach. 

Your eyes snapped open as you abruptly sat up, the blankets thrown over your body pooling around your lower body. The elvish whispers stopped, dissipating into the air as if they were never there. 

“I was wondering when you would wake,” a calm voice said. You turned to your left to see Haldir sitting beside you. He’s no longer donned his immaculate armor, instead wore casual clothing, the design more human than elven. It looked itchy and ill fitting him, lacking the usual delicate details that outed something as elvish craftsmanship. His crimson cloak was discarded, probably ruined in the fight. 

But he was alive, and that’s all that mattered.

He was pale, more so than usual. He didn’t have that same ethereal glow all the elves from Lothlorien seemed to possess, and if not for the pointed ears that poked through his silver hair, he could be mistaken for a human. Deep set dark circle surrounded his pale blue eyes, his complexion pallid and tired. 

But he’s alive. And you can’t help the small smile that formed on your lips. 

You’d managed to save him. 

“You sustained some serious wounds. For a moment the healers were convinced you wouldn’t pull through.” he continued after a moment of silence passed over you two. 

“Well as you can see, it is difficult to kill me,” you told him, not sure of what else to say. He simply hummed in response, the sound causing your heart to beat just a bit faster than before. 

“It would seem so. However I’m not sure the same thing could be said about me, if not for your presence on the battlefield tonight.” Haldir said. His eyes never wavered from yours, his gaze like ice clashing with fire. For a moment you saw it; a flicker of fear that disappeared as quickly as it appeared. The fear of death. He was on death’s doorstep, seconds away from dying, a concept so foreign to someone belonging to an immortal race. 

“Well, if not for you and the army of elves, I’m sure everyone here would’ve been dead,” you said. His brows furrowed, creating small lines on his forehead and a tiny dip in between his brows. Such a human thing that you’ve never seen on an elf. His eyes flit away from your gaze, but they quickly return. You nearly recoiled from the intensity in them, they burned through you like a roaring fire - so different from their usual icy nature - that would burn you if you got too close. But you couldn’t help but get closer, unafraid of the embers that could lash out at you, scorching whatever it touched. 

“I owe you my life, my lady. I will do whatever it takes to repay you for what you have done, even if I have to spend the rest of my immortal life,” he said, the words lacked the usual calm and cool tone of voice you began to associate him with. They were strong and fierce and true, like he believed every word he said. 

“I appreciate it, I really do, but out there in the battle, I almost died a few times, and I can guarantee at least one of the people who saved my life was an elf. Consider us even, there is no need to submit yourself to eternal debt.” you said. It was silent, and not the awkward “let the ground swallow me whole silence”, but a nice one; the type of calmness and relief that can only come from surviving an impossible fight. 

“Very well.” Haldir broke the silence first, a weak smile forming on his face. It’s fragile and small, clearly the after effects of nearly dying still weighed heavily on him. “You move well for a human.” 

You raised an eyebrow at him. 

“I’m assuming that’s supposed to be a compliment.” you said. Instantly his face flushed scarlet red, matching the cloak he wore in battle. His eyes shot to the ground and if you had to guess, you’d assume his heart rate picked up as well.

“I-I uh yes, it was - is. It is a compliment. I only meant to say that you moved through the battlefield as if you were one of the Eldar. I’ve never known a mortal who could dance through battle the way you did, as if you’ve been training for hundreds of years,” He continued watching the ground, almost expecting you to lash out or take offense. Instead you laughed. 

It wasn’t the full bellied laugh Gimi often sported, especially after a few tankards of ale, instead it was more akin to a whisper in the wind. But it was pleasant and sweet, a stark contrast to the fear he’d seen in your eyes moments before you fell unconscious. 

“Thank you, though I admit, I’m not too good with the bow,” you said. A smile formed on your face, it was sweet and warm and everything was good. Your eyes danced with a whirlwind of emotions, scared you’d ruin the mood that surrounded the two of you. 

“Perhaps I will teach you then. A small way to show my gratitude. We can begin training after the defeat of Sauron.”

“I was under the impression the elves would be sailing West?” you asked, wracking your brain to try and remember when the Lorien elves sailed. You remembered Galadriel leaving with Gandalf and Frodo, would Haldir then follow as well? It was difficult to say, since in the movies he never survived past this night. 

“They are, however, there is no need for me to leave immediately,” he said. His expression softened, a small smile playing on his lips. 

“Then it would be my honor.”

~~~~~~~~~~  

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I was talking with @himboskywalker​ about Tolkien and fandom and fic, because I’m always curious where people’s “area” of the wider Legendarium are at, whether they’re a fan of the Dwarves or the Humans or the Elves or the Valar or what!  (As a surprise to absolutely no one, the Elves are where my heart is at, where I very much love the Noldor, but if you give me a choice I’m going to run over to that Sindar-centric fic every time.) Which got us onto the topic of fic recs, where, yes, I’ve done a LOT of Tolkien fic recs but I tend to read something of a wide variety and this is a list specifically aimed at those who are familiar with the wider Tolkien world, but haven’t really read much fic and want to know where to start! Other Recs First: - If you haven’t gotten further into Tolkien’s work (like say beyond the movies), I’ve done something of a primer here, which includes fic recs and brief explanations and links to videos that help explain some things.  It’s not as hard as it seems to get involved, honest! - Some other fic recs here, as an addition to the above. - My Tolkien blog (which I haven’t been on in awhile, though, I haven’t let it go in my heart yet) has, I’m not kidding, A LOT of fic recs, I did recs regularly for about three years, so it’s almost as massive as my collection of SW recs. If I Could Only Pick Three To Start You With: ✦ And What Happened After by thearrogantemu - This is the fic that took me from enjoying the Silm characters to diving face-first into really loving them, because it wove such an engaging story about the characters sailing to Aman at the end of LOTR, where various characters you wouldn’t think interacting would be as meaningful as they are, but the fic absolutely sells them on it.  Frodo and Feanor having a conversation about language?  Sam and Maglor sharing a boat to the West?  These things are amazing, as this is a fic about healing and what it means to sail into the Undying Lands.  Also, it has a Feanor and Fingolfin reunion that literally put tears in my eyes. ✦ Interrupted Journeys by ellisk - I’m generally not someone who does a lot of rereading of fic just because I have so many new ones to get to, but I’ve read my favorites in this series (parts 3 to 5 are my sweet spot especially) probably four times through now because “Elfling Legolas growing up in Greenwod with a whole cast of characters around him, as the Shadow so very, very slowly creeps towards them” may sound somewhat simple, but the worldbuilding here is off the scale.  The weaving in of how much the First Age and various Elven politics influenced Thranduil’s ruling of a Silvan people is a major theme, but it’s also good parents raising that precious Elfling right and he and his cousins+friends getting into all sorts of mischief, so it’s balanced between humor and drama in the exact amounts I want.  You can skip the first two fics and jump into the third if you like, which is when Legolas is introduced, but I enjoy the whole thing. ✦ Return to Aman OR Quenta Narquelion by bunn - I can’t pick between these two, they’re both incredible.  Return to Aman is basically “Elrond grabs Maglor and drags him to Aman with them” and it breaths such incredible lift into all the characters of Aman, it doesn’t negate the terrible things the Feanorians did, but neither does it negate Elrond’s love for them and his biological family, too.  It’s another fic that’s about healing and forgiveness and it made me glow to read it.  Quenta Narquelion is basically “Feanor refused the call of Mandos after he died and everything started to snowball from there” and it’s an absolutely heartbreaking look at all our Problematic Fave Feanorians and how they were once good people trying to do the best they could, but bit by bit they slipped into the dark.  It’s especially amazing for capturing the complexities of Feanor, as he hovers over his children as a spirit and it really brought me around on his character. The Silmarillion and other First Age Batshit Faves: ✦ The Starlit Sky by Cirth is the fic that really made me get the potential of reading about Maedhros and Maglor raising Elrond and Elros, where it does such a fantastic job of showing that there was genuine affection there, even the midst of all the angst and trauma and pain.  You really get why Elrond could never give up on them, after reading this fic. ✦ In Courts of Living Stone by ncfan - “What if Maeglin never left Nan Elmoth and instead, several decades later, found himself on an errand to Menegroth and developed a relationship with Finduilas instead?” isn’t a fic I expected to capture my heart, but boy did it ever.  Beautiful characterization and beautiful writing, it really captured my imagination, but also gave me ALLLLLL the Maeglin feelings, as well as made me pine that this Finduilas couldn’t have been more common in fandom. ✦ naught but the shores and the sea by ncfan is more of Elrond and Maglor, where it’s an AU that has Elrond finding Maglor after the disastrous attempt to recover the Silmarils and I loved it a lot. ✦ The Crane Wife by Trebia is one that takes an underused character from Tolkien (Lalwen, in this case) and breathes this incredible life into her, gives her personality and joy and sorrow and meaning and, look, any fic that can convince me that Thranduil would marry a Noldo and utterly believe it, you know it’s well-written! The Second Age Is Kind of Quiet in Fandom But I Love It Regardless: ✦ The Art of Long-Distance Grandparenting by Kazaera is a lovely and bittersweet (but mostly lighter in tone) fic about the separation of the Sea between family members and does a wonderful job with Idril’s character, as she tries to stay connected to her grandchildren while being so distant from them and unable to see them, unless they choose to come to Aman.  There’s joy to be found here and it’s a lovely read. ✦ Relativity by French Pony is a lovely look at the final meeting between Elrond and Elros and strikes the right amount of bittersweetness, where it’s awkward and difficult and heartbreaking, but also feels natural and like this was how it was meant to be.  I had many, many Elven Twin feelings during the whole thing.  (I like all their fic, they’re worth checking out their other stuff for, too!) ✦ A Thing or Two About Elrond by Crookneck is a series of fics about Elrond and the various relationships he has--with Celebrian, with his children, with Gil-Galad, etc.--and I remember being really charmed by all of them and how much shit Elrond has seen over the course of his life. The Third Age, Lord of the Rings Version: ✦ Boromir's Return by Osheen Nevoy - This one is sort hard to summarize, but it’s basically “Boromir lives, makes a friend, and slowly changes everything about the LOTR plot”, but it’s so much more than that, where the worldbuilding is phenomenal, the pacing is incredible, it made me fall in love with Boromir as a character all over again, it contains probably the best portrayal of Denethor I’ve ever read in fandom, and I really loved the OC and so on.  It’s utterly engrossing and honestly I cannot recommend it highly enough, even if you’re not usually into this sort of thing. ✦ The River by Indigo Bunting is a fic where Legolas and Sam get separated from the others for a brief time and I love fics that take two characters who don’t interact much, throw them into an intense situation, and sees what happens.  It’s not precisely a light-hearted fic, it’s very intense, but it’ll make you fall in love with the sheer good in both characters and the friendship they develop.  It’s brilliantly written and I cannot recommend it enough. ✦ A Bit of Rope by Aiwendiel is a fic where Gandalf doesn’t fall at Moria and it changes everything--not necessarily for the better.  The slow, creeping sense of things changing, things going just a little bit worse here and there, until you realize how much darker the Fellowship’s journey could have been, was brilliantly done, and one I thought did justice to the idea, it’s not grimdark, there’s still light and hope here, but it makes you feel like, oh, maybe things happened as they did for a reason, even as hard as that seemed sometimes.  Gorgeously plotted and utterly engrossing. The Third Age, Mirkwood Version: ✦ daw the minstrel has an entire series of fics about Legolas growing up in Mirkwood and there’s absolutely a reason why she was one of the most well-known authors in that corner of fandom.  Her ability to create new characters (including two brothers for Legolas) was incredible, I cared so much about the family dynamics and got swept up in the drama (which was in a very loving family, but Legolas was definitely a mischief-seeker) and they’re fantastic.  If you find yourself in something of a stretch with too many OCs and your attention wavers, you can always skip around, they don’t have to be read in order and a lot of the non-canon characters can be skimmed over, imo. ✦ In a Field of Blood and Stone by ScribeofArda is so much better than what The Hobbit movies gave us of the Battle of Five Armies, it does such beautiful justice to the complicated character of Thranduil and Legolas, not sacrificing the warmth there for how difficult these times are and the war they find themselves in the middle of.  This Bard is also really engaging and fun to read--I read pretty much the entire novel’s worth in, like, a day or two because I could not put this one down. ✦ Swordplay and Swimming by cliodna_bright has an incredible meeting where Thranduil comes to visit Rivendell, runs into Elladan and Elrohir, who are young enough that they speak without thinking, and it’s not precisely a humor fic, but I was screaming the entire time because it’s so sharply written and so absolutely delightful, I LOVE IT. ✦ Deep and Crisp and Even by rivlee made me fall in love with how Elves and humans may look very similar, but there’s this sense of otherworldliness to the Elves, as shown through Bard’s eyes when he has a meeting with Thranduil.  Beautifully written and just the right amount of atmospheric. The Fourth Age Where Everything Actually Does Mostly Work Out: ✦ Far Horizons by Bodkin is the Fourth Age fic of my heart, where the various Elves that we came to know in Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit are all in Aman and decide to build their own realm there.  Which is difficult because Elven Politics even just amongst themselves, much less clashing with all the established politics of the other Elven realms in Aman!  But it’s a light-hearted fic (for the most part) that’s about healing and moving forward, balancing their ties to their history versus that Middle-Earth changed them, and I love it for soothing my soul.  (Thranduil sailed, you can’t tell me otherwise!!!)(Bonus moments of Glorfindel being pretty hilarious.)  I like all of bodkin’s work, but this one has a special place with me. ✦ Age of Healing by trollmela is one where Maedhros and Legolas have a conversation in Aman and it’s about the bittersweetness of healing and how difficult it is, taking two characters who would never have met in canon and weaving something entirely engaging and poignant out of it. Collections That Span The Ages: ✦ This Taste of Shadow by Mira_Jade - This is a collection of dozens of various shorter stories (or sometimes 10k “ficlets”) that you can largely skip around in if you have specific characters you like or you can just start at the beginning and read through.  It contains looks at pretty much everyone, from Maedhros to Galadriel to Thranduil to Elrond to Caranthir to Glorfindel to the Valar, etc.  I’ve enjoyed pretty much everything I’ve read in this collection! ✦ Fiondil's Tapestry and Tales from Vairë's Loom by Fiondil are in the same vein and I have really enjoyed everything I’ve read from both of them!  I especially remember that there was one chapter that had a scene between Thranduil and Cirdan and thinking, ahhhh, why has no one ever written that before!? as an example of the neat things it does.  But also lots about Elrond and Glorfindel and the Valar and so on! This probably doesn’t feel like a super extensive list, but those collection series will give you an excellent spanning of Elves, Humans, Dwarves, Hobbits, etc., not just the same central characters, but giving time to a lot of lesser focused ones as well.  Like, I feel I’ve read a fair chunk of Elwing fic, but I couldn’t point you to a specific one in my list of recs, which means I’m pretty sure it was in the collections ones or else she got some good scenes in one of the Aman-based fics, so I swear the above is at least a solid place to start for dipping one’s toe into Tolkien fic. AS ALWAYS, OTHER PEOPLE’S RECS ARE WELCOME, god knows I haven’t read anything in the last two years (and will have missed a lot even before that) and so I always need more recs, too!

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1,4,6?!

1 (Tell us about your current project(s)  – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?):

I'm a one-project kind of man, so I only have one fic going right now. It's a LOTR urban fantasy au, in which I just gave everyone cars and cell phones and modern clothes but changed basically nothing about the setting (so, the hobbits are still pretty isolated and don't use a ton of technology, the Rohirrim still ride horses and have a singular highway in their entire country, Gondor is pretty much completely industrialized but still keeps up most of their traditions, etc). The actual plot is a canon divergence! Everything is exactly the same except I changed the perspective to focus more on Aragorn and Boromir up until what would be the end of the first book, where the power of modern technology means that Boromir doesn't actually die, which fundamentally changes several things >:) I'm focusing on themes of coming into your inheritance and breaking generational cycles and complicated parent-child relationships and also the incredible power of queer love :) I'm not that far into it (I only have like 25 pages and they're just getting to the Council of Elrond) but I'm most excited about All of it but especially getting to explore the Boromir-Faramir relationship!!!

4 (Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like):

I have a lot of writing that I'm super proud of so this one is hard! I just finished a third draft of my 227-page LOTR passion project, and one of my favorite new lines of dialogue that I added is one that takes place during the battle in front of Minas Tirith. One of my main characters, Gilraen (younger cousin of Aragorn, possibly one of my favorite characters I've ever invented), is in charge of leading the wall guard, and when the battle seems like it's getting really dark and horrible I gave her a speech a la the one that Aragorn gives at the Black Gate in the movies, but like, in character for her. It's one of my favorite bits of dialogue I've ever written!!! Here it is:

“All right, men!” Gilraen yelled at the archers on the wall. “The odds are stacked against us, but we will carry on! You hear me? We are not going to give up even if we’re outnumbered! When Elendil and Gil-Galad faced Sauron in all his power, did they turn and run? No, they fucking didn’t! They stood in front of the Black Gate and they kept fighting, and look how that turned out. Are we the children of Elendil? Do we not carry his legacy? Yes we fucking do! We are going to keep fighting this goddamn war! Now, you’re all going to stop running, and you’re going to string your bows, and we are going to keep fighting! What are we waiting for? The king to come back?” A lump welled up in her throat, and she swallowed it down. “We have today to make our mark on history! Not all of us will die, and they will carry on our legacy. What would you have them say? That the people of Gondor turned and ran when the battle turned against them?” A few soldiers gave tentative cries of, “no!” “That’s fucking right! Now, put those arrows to the string! We’re fighting this bitch to the end!”

I mostly like it because it takes the formal speech that usually happens in LOTR and turns it into something more vernacular. Also, I just love putting curse words in the mouths of high fantasy characters.

Bonus: Clog would be mad at me if I didn't include THE most iconic line from the same fic, so here it is :)

The horse that Gilraen had been given was a handsome horse, and he knew it. He was a challenge to control unless you were very firm with him. Gilraen usually felt bad when she accidentally hurt animals, but she found some pleasure in kicking him to make him listen to her. He was an arrogant bastard.

6 (What character do you have the most fun writing?):

Okay I know I've been making this entire ask about my LOTR fic but it's genuinely Gilraen, the character from above. I invented her in high school and she's grown and developed over the years into more of a real character. At first she was kind of one of those "haha i'm not like other girls! i'm badass!! yo!" which was fine and all but like, she ought to be a fully realized creation! Now that I'm an adult who understands how to write better, she's turned into a deeply complex person who I have so many FEELINGS about. Also, she's the OG of my army of powerful lesbians. For characters that I didn't invent, I think Zhao Yunlan has been the most fun to write just because we're so similar and yet so different. I love a good chaotic ADHD bisexual :))) And Mollymauk from Critical Role!!

Meta asks for writers :)

[aion-rsa]

The Lord of the Rings Almost Killed Off One of the Hobbits

https://ift.tt/2THdh6D

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy’s $2.9 billion collective worldwide gross and 17 Academy Award wins (one of which was for Best Picture,) certainly make a case for the 2001-2003 films being the product of a winning formula, both production-wise and plot-wise. However, the process of getting the grandiose, once-unfathomable project off the ground naturally involved producers pressuring director Peter Jackson to implement ideas often contradictory to the source material. Apparently, one such idea would have seen one of the film’s four hobbits die!

While the more loquacious half of Lord of the Rings’ onscreen hobbits, Dominic Monaghan and Billy Boyd—Meriadoc “Merry” Brandybuck and Peregrin “Pippin” Took, respectively—have told myriad stories about life on the set across the past few decades through interviews and the films’ insightfully entertaining DVD commentary, the duo brought new anecdotes in an interview with IGN promoting their recently launched, Rings-heavy podcast, The Friendship Onion. According to them, there was a brief period in production during which Jackson was being “pressured from above” (presumably New Line Cinema,) to sacrifice at least one of the film’s four hobbits—of course, with the other two being Elijah Wood’s Frodo Baggins and Sean Astin’s Samwise Gamgee—for a development that would clearly contradict the text of J.R.R. Tolkien’s novels.

While the identity of the specific hobbit producers wished to see relegated to taking second breakfast in the great beyond was not revealed, Monaghan offers a theory, stating, “It’s a good job that didn’t happen, because it would have been me,” he laughed. “It definitely would have. There’s no way they are killing Frodo and Sam, and the only ones that would be left would be Merry and Pippin. They wouldn’t kill Pippin because Pippin has a really strong story with Gandalf. It would have definitely been me. I think Pete quite rightly was like, ‘This is a luminary piece of written work, and we need to stick close to the text.’ So, he stuck by his guns. Yeah, I’m thankful that didn’t happen.”

Read more

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By Matthew Byrd

Much to the gratitude of Monaghan and Tolkien purists everywhere, Jackson won that particular battle in the end, thereby leaving the trilogy as a more authentic take on the text. However, while the notion of actually making a casualty of one of the beloved hobbits might seem outrageous to moviegoers, especially those with intimate knowledge of the Middle Earth mythos, it was actually a sound suggestion from a purely dramatic standpoint. After all, as with Bilbo Baggins in preceding story The Hobbit, the diminutive hole-dwellers from the Shire were meant to represent average people, unprepared for the travails of life away from home, who, during times of war, find bravery within themselves when thrust into overwhelming circumstances. Pertinently, with strong bonds having been forged amongst comrades during said circumstances, the loss of one yields a dramatic payoff that’s hard to resist from a narrative perspective. Notwithstanding The Fellowship of the Rings‘ fateful death of Boromir, such a death wouldn’t even be without precedence, since, in adhering to the literary lore, 2014’s The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies famously featured the deaths of the party’s two youngest, most energetic dwarves, Kili and Fili, in the climactic moments of Jackson’s prequel trilogy.

If, as Monaghan theorizes, Merry was set to be sacrificed in the name of plot pathos, then it likely would have occurred during Return of the King’s Battle of the Pelennor Fields, during which Merry—after being forbade by King Théoden—secretly joined a disguised Éowyn to participate in the Kingdom of Rohan’s horseback counter-attack against the siege forces of Mordor orcs—and later the oliphaunt-riding humans of the Haradrim—outside of Gondor. Merry’s role in the battle was the clear culmination of an arc that saw him go from a crop-thieving ne’er-do-well to sword-wielding battlefield hero, and highlighted him at his highest point. He also proved integral to the victory when he stabbed the Witch King of Angmar in the back—injuring himself in the process—which allowed Éowyn to make the iconic “I am no man” deathblow to the head, taking the enemy’s most powerful player off the board. Yet, Merry was left in bad shape by the end of the battle, found barely cognizant by a wandering Pippin in the aftermath, facilitating one of the film’s many emotional reunions. This moment could have been repurposed into Merry’s death scene, after which a perturbed Pippin would be motivated for vengeance in the ensuing, trilogy-climactic Battle at the Black Gate, thereby completing his own arc.

New Line Cinema

While Jackson had to make several changes from the source material—mostly regarding the timeframe and segments that detracted from the main plot—to make The Lord of the Rings’s chronicle-styled prose work on the big screen, he also knew that the understated narrative in the periphery from Tolkien’s extensive lore was an intangible quality that separated this mythos from other fantasy offerings. Indeed, the appendices included at the end of the novel trilogy were a consistent source of context-setting backstories that Jackson wove into the main narrative of the movies. Case in point, in the novels, the movie-prominent romance of Aragorn and Arwen was primarily told in the appendices, outside the main content. Likewise, Tolkien crafted full fates for our foursome of hobbits, including Merry, who ended up marrying Estella Bolger and becoming a key member of the Shire’s leadership as the Master of Buckland. The backstory is so extensive that it also reveals when Merry and Pippin died, after which they were entombed with honor over in Gondor, later joined by King Aragorn Elessar himself. Consequently, it would have seemed disrespectful to dismiss such extensive stories by Tolkien.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Regardless, fans of The Lord of the Rings will soon have no shortage of new onscreen content, with Amazon’s untitled prequel series—set thousands of years before the main story—currently in production and possibly set to premiere either by the end of 2021 or sometime into 2022. Moreover, an anime feature focused on the namesake of famous fortress Helm’s Deep, titled The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim, is also in development from Warner Bros. and New Line. Given the eras in which these offerings take place, fans can likely breathe a sigh of relief for poor Merry.

The post The Lord of the Rings Almost Killed Off One of the Hobbits appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3l810TY

[borom1r]

I'll be honest, I don't know much abt lotr, but!!! for the text game you're putting together, what has been your favourite date and/or route you've written so far? + as an addition, if you'd like, what are things you admire/love abt any character of your choosing? (I hope you're doing okay bestie, I'm sorry you're having a rough night 💖)

haugh thank you dude i am. feeling more grounded now (and my hand stopped hurting so i Didn't actually burn it, yayyy) but gods that was bad for a hot minute

ummmm my favorite thing ive written is probs tied between Éomer's 2B date (go to a celebratory bonfire w/ him) because there's a lot of silliness, it's just very lighthearted + cute!! or Faramir's first date?? it's actually hard to pick a specific date bc Faramir is just very fun to write. I adore him so much lol — his first date's a little library meetcute and you get to give him a kiss on the nose and listen to him be So autistic about Really Old Texts (it's what he deserves)

uuuuuuuuuuu well u know as a Boromir Guy. a certified Boromir Enjoyer. Enjoyer of Boromir. there's just. oagh theres so much. I was rewatching th Osgiliath scene again for reasons (quotin it for sth i think) and the way he behaves with Faramir vs how he behaves with Denethor is so. im DERANGED i need to sit down w/ Sean Bean and talk abt Boromir for fucking hours. the way he prepares himself to have to speak w/ his father, the disbelieving shake of his head at Denethor's "I know his uses and they are few" line about Faramir. the "one more moment of peace can he not give us that" line. "the victory is Faramir's as well" and he's grinning, his nod of encouragement, motioning Faramir over because he's RIGHT and Faramir's achievements deserve to be recognized and they're fighting fucking FORCES OF MORDOR so how could he possibly blame his brother for Osgiliath falling? they reclaimed it and they're alive and that's cause for celebration! im so.

Boromir son of Denethor seeing the best in people. when he could so easily and so understandably be completely fucking pessimistic. He is ON THE FRONTLINES he would have every excuse to be a bitter jaded asshole having grown up with the sole purpose of being a soldier. he lives only to serve!!! and he lives watching the people he is supposed to safeguard suffering and dying, watching the darkness of Mordor spread with little hope of vanquishing it, only keeping it at bay for a time. it has been long since he had any hope!!!!!! and yet the victory is Faramir's too! his baby brother who he is so proud of, who he sees the absolute best in, who he longs for Denethor to see the good in too because Faramir is trying his absolute fucking best and Boromir sees that!! Boromir, who sees Merry and Pippin's determination and takes the time to coach them in swordplay when others would have made them stay behind. they're only hobbits, after all. what could they do? (quite a lot, naturally, but it was Boromir at first who empowered them to be more than just tagalongs. who thought they should be more prepared and took the time and energy to make sure they were.)

there is frailty in men but there is goodness too. the world is cruel and awful and he is surrounded by violence and death. and even a wizard like Gandalf can die. but there is goodness in men. goodness in the world!! Minas Tirith is on the brink of disaster but it is beautiful and he longs to return. even diminished, she is beautiful!! and he wants to share that. he wants to share Faramir's victories. he knows firsthand how horrifically cruel the world can be but he sees the best in the people around him and he wants others to see it too. ARGH!!!!!!!!

ALSO. ive talked abt it in another post floating around somewhere but while i do love book!Faramir i think he is. kind of a nightmare person. in that he has some Deepset Prejudices that he Needs To Unpack. smacking the shit out of him with a cardboard tube.

and while i thnk there are valid criticisms to make abt movie!Faramir i do actually GENUINELY adore that he is tempted by the ring. because on one side of it, his temptation mirrors Boromir's in that it is done out of love (desire for his father's love and approval vs Boromir's love for his people) and that he overcomes it. because that is Boromir's Baby Brother and isnt the goal of it all for the younger generations to surpass the older? isn't the hope that Faramir would learn from Boromir's failures and be better? not repeat them? and he doesn't. he is flawed and he is tempted by much the same thing and yet he does not fall!! and that's not to say there's any Legitimate moral failing on either of their parts because its the fucking One Ring, but i think its just. very poignant. I genuinely prefer it way more than the book where hes all "I would NEVER take the ring!!!"

but he also has his whole "boromir died well, achieving some good, and was even more beautiful in death than in life" thing and that gets into the spirituality of middle earth and the layers of Weirdness there which im not abt to unpack on this ask. not a fan of it in the slightest. shaking Boromir's hand for being rebellious against god tho i would be too if i was living in that whole fucking sitch. if the only thing my brother could say was "idfk if he fucked up or not but he was more beautiful in death than ever so ik he died a holy death, which is preferrable" my ghost would start throwing bricks.

also, having movie!Faramir fall prey to the ring when book!Faramir is like this. paragon of grace and goodness and holiness who Cannot be tempted. idk i think especially with Aragorn grappling with his humanity and frailty as a man, having Faramir Also be tempted is sooooo. like. augh!!! it is not a failure to be tempted. you can still be Good and Gracious and Lordly and a Paragon Of Men. he is Still Faramir even though he fell prey to the call of the ring. he resisted. he let Frodo go, putting his own life at risk in the process, because he is still a Good Man even though he is flawed. even though he almost didn't. movie!Faramir my beloved!!!!!!!

LASTLY ik ive talked abt this a couple times but it is fucking DERANGED to me that Éomer is only twenty-eight in TA 3019. HE SHOULD'VE BEEN IN THE TAVEEEEEERRRNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[overthinkinglotr]

So, what's your opinion of movie!Faramir? i understand the filmmakers had their reasons for changing his scenes with Frodo and Sam, but I love book!Faramir so much that I really disliked what they did there. I'd love to hear your thoughts, I love your analysis of the movie!version of other characters. This blog is amazing ❤️

Ahh thank you!

I think I’ve talked about this before but I have a lot feelings on it so I’ll talk about again-- the TL;DR is that I like the idea behind film!Faramir’s character, I just have a lot of issues with the way it was executed.

The character they were *going for* in the films is:

Film!Faramir is gentle and kind, like he was in the books. But unlike his book-counterpart, he idolizes/looks up to Boromir too much-- especially because Boromir has died so recently, and you tend to idealize loved ones after they die.

His character arc in the films is *supposed* to be about learning he needs to trust his own sense of right and wrong instead of trying to do what he thinks his brother would’ve done.

He begins to realize this when Sam tells him that his brother is dead because he tried to murder Frodo---  forcing film!Faramir to confront that his brother wasn’t the idealized hero he wants to believe he was.

Film!Faramir gradually goes from trying too hard to be a Tough Warrior like Boromir(tm) in the Two Towers.....to using his gentleness and kindness to reassure Eowyn in Return of the King, finally recognizing that his good heart was his real strength all along.

And again, I love the idea of that character arc! It’s not like the books, but it’s compelling in its own way!

I also think the “Faramir takes the hobbits to Osgiliath” plotline was necessary for the sake of pacing/giving Frodo/Sam’s plotline a climax, and to actually SHOW the Ring’s corrupting power in action. It also ties into one of the main themes in the film!Two Towers that wasn’t in the books-- the theme of people struggling to avoid confronting their grief directly.

THE PROBLEM IS

It seems like the screenwriters thought the only way Faramir taking the hobbits to Osgiliath could have tension was if........Faramir was pointlessly violent and even cruel. He’s pointlessly violent to Gollum, and pointlessly cold and cruel to Frodo and Sam. For....no reason.....?

In the books, we are *told* that the Ring has an irresistible power to corrupt people, but are *shown* Faramir resisting it easily.

In the films, we have a different problem. We’re *told* that Faramir is kind and gentle compared to Boromir, but we’re *shown* Faramir being far more violent and cruel than Boromir ever was.

And it’s like... I really don’t think making Faramir so violent was necessary to add tension? Again-- there was tension when Boromir was falling to the Ring in FOTR, even though Boromir was always kind or at least sympathetic. You don’t NEED to make a character mean and cold for there be tension.

I’ve mentioned before that I think the “Film!Faramir takes the hobbits to Osgiliath” plotline would’ve worked really well if Faramir had just been kind and gentle towards the hobbits/Gollum. That’s literally all I think needed to be changed, lol.  If Faramir ruffled their hair and talked reassuringly to them, .but still insisted on taking them to Gondor anyway because It’s What Boromir Would Have Done......it would’ve let us have film!Faramir’s character arc about learning that he doesn’t need to be Boromir/a subplot that was necessary for the pacing of the movie, while actually letting us see film!Faramir as a kind gentle person.

TL;DR:

For me it’s like--- I love it when adaptations change things, and re-interpret characters! The problem with film!Faramir isn’t that he’s different from book!Faramir......it’s that he’s written inconsistently.

We’re constantly told he’s gentler than Boromir while being shown the exact opposite, and it really weakens the storyline the film was going for.

[arofili]

fic writer tag game!!

i was tagged by @meztliel, thanks so much!!

AO3 name: starlightwalking

Fandoms: mostly Tolkien, my current main WIPs are Hobbit and LOTR fics, but i’m definitely mostly writing for the Silm these days, just lots of oneshots. i also dabble in Les Mis (at least once a year for Barricade Day!) and TAZ :)

Number of fics: 179??? how??? and i’m only gonna have more!! i’m not even done with B2MeM20 yet!!

Fic I spent the most time on: oh geez. that’s a tough one. this fic that i just posted, a Measse/Thuringwethil oneshot, i started in 2015?? but i left it sitting for 5 years, so i don’t think that counts. and i guess this drabble comp would be the next candidate, i started it in May 2016 and i last updated it in December 2019, but it’s...a drabble compilation, not an actual fic. so i think i actually spent the most time on my current WIPs, “Moonlight” and “Roads Go On,” both originally posted in May 2018 (jesus i was still in HIGH SCHOOL) and updated.....last year...... really i just haven’t had time to work on them, rip, though i think about them constantly. that’s what happens when you’re not in high school anymore i suppose....

Fic I spent the least time on: i mean, something from that drabble comp, probably. Or a B2MeM ficlet. probably this Glorfindel fic? I only remember writing it because I know it was written in a hurry at like 2am and my friend Moth @thishazeleyeddemon loved it and I was like “wow weird considering how little effort I put into it!”

Longest fic: Currently my post-BotFA Tauriel fic “Beneath the Stars” coming in at 49k! RGO and Moonlight both promise to be longer, but that would require me actually finishing either of them... but I love BtS so much that I’m glad it’s up there, it was a real labor of love <3

Shortest fic: “The Lay of Nienor” which I just wrote this past month! it’s only 238 words long - but it’s in verse, so that’s pretty respectable!

Most hits: My first BotFA fix it fic, “A Merrier Place,” with 5544 hits - to no one’s surprise by my chagrin. That was one of my first forays into Hobbit fic and I wrote it shortly after the movie came out, when people were most in need of a fix it AU. So I don’t blame them, really - but as I’m sort of setting out to rewrite my thoughts on what actually would’ve happened in an Everyone Lives AU in my current fic “Moonlight,” I wish people would pay more attention to that...

Most kudos: My TRSB19 Gigolas fic, “Love and Fear,” coming in with 155 kudos! this fic features art from @ginogollum and honestly, it deserves that love! (though, I think it does say a lot about what fandom wants that my only romo!gigolas fic has the most kudos of anything i’ve written, and all my qp!gigolas fics are much lower down the list... though perhaps I’m being unfair, considering my qp!Domadry fic “Wedding Blues” has the second-most kudos at 147.)

Most comment threads: My other TRSB19 fic, the Feanorian Redemption/Rebirth story “ATATYA” - that’s 71 comment threads and 147 total comments including replies!!! :) that makes me very very happy, because I wrote the 45,000 words of that fic in like...two weeks, about? it was INTENSE. and i’m very proud of that story, it’s got a lot of headcanons that I stand by, and I reference it frequently!

Most bookmarks: I added this category bc it felt weird it wasn’t here. Again, this prize goes to “Love and Fear” with 43 bookmarks!! woah :o second place is “A Merrier Place” with 35, and then the first fic I haven’t already mentioned is “The Naming Dame,” a HTTYD book fic with 30 bookmarks! I really should go back and update that fic, considering I wrote it before the last book came out and there’s new relevant information...

Total word count: I also added this one because I wanna brag!! I currently have 739,961 words archived on AO3 - holy shit!! adding the ~253k words I didn’t transfer over from FFN, that’s nearly a million words of fic! by the time i finish B2MeM I might push past that threshhold!!!!! that’s so exciting!!!! (fun fact about me: before Tolkien, my main fandom was...warrior cats...roughly 215k of that fic I left to gather dust on FFN is WC fic........)

Favourite fic I wrote: This isn’t fair, I can’t choose just one!! Ugh...well, if I must, I think it has to be “ATATYA”? This is subject to change, and “Beneath the Stars” is a close second, but “ATATYA” is my first real Silm longfic and I’m very proud of what I accomplished there, especially in such a short amount of time. Bonus: my favorite oneshot / favorite non-Tolkien fic is “and Love,” the aro Magnus fic I wrote for ASAW last year!

Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: I mean, I already talked about how “Moonlight” is kind of a rewrite of “A Merrier Place,” so...hm. Well, earlier today in an ask game I mentioned my fic “fell and fey” which is the Eol-living-in-a-fairy-tale fic I wrote just this past month. I started writing a longer, more poetic version of that fic that I’d like to return to and expand on someday, but I wanted to get that idea out of my head and B2MeM was a great excuse to do it, so I went with the shorter version instead - for now!

Share a bit of a WIP or a story idea you’re planning on:

I’ve got a couple WIPs right now... here’s a snippet of ch8 of “Roads Go On” (which i PROMISE i will have up soon...i know i’ve been saying that for more than year but i MEAN IT this time...)

“What do you mean we can’t take the freeway?” Boromir snapped.

“My way or the highway, he means,” Gimli quipped. “And, uh...not the highway, I guess.”

Mithrandir shot Gimli a withering glare. Though he only smiled, some part of him shriveled up inside. A wizard’s evil eye was nothing to mess with.

I think I’ve already shared that snippet in a different tag game, so here’s one more for the road - this one’s from “Cause and Consequence,” my Halenthir baby OC fic. This snippet comes from a chapter that won’t be out for awhile (and might undergo some serious revamping before then), and it’s set right after the Nirnaeth, with my OC (Ryndil) about to confront their dad.

“This is no place for mortals,” Maglor said flatly. “You do know who we are, don’t you, Rýndil of Brethil?”

A shiver ran down their spine. Seven tall elf-lords, gaunt and scarred and bloody in the aftermath of a disastrous battle. Maedhros, the eldest, was a shell of the glorious figure he’d been on the battlefield; they weren’t sure if he was even awake, his eyes were so glassy and unfocused. Grief, they supposed. They’d heard the rumors about him and the High King, after all.

Maglor, leading in his place, trembling despite the firmness in his golden voice. Celegorm, bitter and angry and mean despite his fair features. Curufin, his dark shadow, flint in his eyes and venom on his tongue. Amrod and Amras, mirroring each other in their distrustful glares. And yet despite the blood and dirt and pain, a light shone from each of them. These were men to be feared, men to be worshipped.

And then there was him. Caranthir the Dark. Rýndil’s father, the blood flowing through their veins, the reason they were here in the first place. Gaunt and red-faced, the weary host of his defeated brothers, he had scarcely stopped moving about and making room for them since they arrived.

As much as Rýndil was of the Haladin, as much as they were the child of Haleth, they were bound to this family and people also.

there’s a lot of grief-stricken angry feanorian banter that comes after this (including some Maedhros characterization that i’m Very Proud Of), and honestly? i might just go ahead and post the whole excerpt if anyone wants to read it (it’s about 1.3k words) since I’m fairly sure I will be changing a lot of it anyway, even if it’s only for tone.

~

looking at these stats, i’m both kind of sad and kind of proud. like, i’m proud of myself for what i’ve written, and proud of the relationships i’ve forged with readers and writers on AO3, but i know lots and lots of folks who have waaayyy higher stats than me. i know considering i write a lot of gen and aro fic that i’ll never be a Big Name Fan, but that doesn’t stop me from being jealous... sigh...

anyway, this was very very fun!!! i tag @buffintruder @himrings @mushroomwriter @zealouswerewolfcollector @hennethgalad @absynthe--minded @stormxpadme @morifiinwe @raisingcain-onceagain annnd any other writer who sees this and wants to do it!! no pressure of course, only do it if you want to :)

(and LMK in replies if you’re interested in seeing more of that Ryndil snippet!!)

[jmoonjones]

Book to Movie

Disclaimer: I love these movies and I have utter respect for everyone involved in making them. I am thankful they became a movie in the first place and the soundtrack is one of the best movie scores of all time. When I gripe about this, I am merely using the internet as God intended: to voice my dumb opinion even though nobody asked for it. 

This is going to be long. Buckle in. 

Making a movie adaptation of a book is (I imagine) pretty tricky, and I can only think of a few instances that fucking aced it. BBC’s Pride and Prejudice being the first to come to mind (if I would change anything, it would be make the actors match their characters age more, but since every actor in it did such a wonderful job I don’t even care. When a book is so loved by protective fans, I am sure it’s daunting to even approach such a project. 

As an old person, I grew up long before the LOTR movies came out so my first brush with an adaptation was the animated version (with Aragorn in a mini dress and a scary Elrond) which I liked because it was the only adaptation and I thought rotoscoping was cool. Therefore, my first experience with the trilogy was through the books and my imagination so you imagine I have some strong feelings about some of the choices made for the live action version. 

I know, what a ramble before I even get to the juicy middle of the post. 

Anyway, I’m going to babble about the changes I liked, didn’t like, and all that because I work in entertainment and can’t always voice my opinion about such things with the studios so it gets all pent up. 

Let’s talk character changes because otherwise this is going to be a sprawling mess with no focus. I understand that some characters wouldn’t translate well to movies (see: Tom Bombadil and Goldberry) even if I sort of wish we’d seen them and although I’m gutted about not seeing Glorfindel, Prince Imrahil, Quickbeam, Fatty, and Beregond the plot could still move without them. 

Little character tweaks to translate to another medium is fine. The elves became more mysterious instead of jolly tree singers and the orcs became a lot more menacing. It feels more egregious when the character changes fundamentally clashed with how the character was written and despite the actors all doing a fine job it just seems a shame there was a missed opportunity to adapt faithfully. 

Aragorn had so much more self-doubt in the movie, which is understandable in giving him a character arc but his self-assuredness and love of his brokeass sword are pretty central to who he is. I feel robbed of his hissy fit at Edoras when they ask for his sword. 

I didn’t love the positioning of Gimli as the comic relief (because he’s short and fat?) especially when he is so dignified in the books and Legolas is the goofy one. Less dwarf tossing and more Legolas screaming in terror and gliding on the snow. Among the Fellowship I actually liked the changes to Boromir, or rather that we got to see more of his fun side than we see in the books. The wizards were brilliant, but I feel let down we didn’t get the sassy one liners from Gandalf and a robe of many colors on Sauruman. 

Elrond is grumpier and seems to not give a shit about helping out, which doesn’t ring true. The glossing over of Arwen’s sacrifice for Frodo at the end of the trilogy is such a shame, and where was that standard she worked on for years? It would have been a great scene to see that unfurl on one of the ships. 

Eowyn didn’t feel icy enough, or sadly suicidal as she is in the books and I wish her showdown with the Witch King used the language from the book. “But no living man am I!” just feels better than “I am no man” but that might just be a personal thing. I wish we saw more of Eomer, who is a legit hilarious (not always intentionally) character and more of Theoden being all fatherly to Merry. 

The changes to Faramir was honestly a bit of a shitshow. Blah blah character arcs and all that, but having him drag the hobbits to Osgiliath and having Gollum beaten is just absolutely against who that character is. If the thinking in the writers room was “oh, he’s just Aragorn Lite and we need more inner torment” there were probably other ways to accomplish that. However, they knew they were adapting Lord of the Rings, right? A book full of moral characters? If the books can have beloved characters, maybe trust that they will translate over. In short, we were robbed of Diet Aragorn and a party behind a waterfall which is almost unforgivable. 

Morally grey and broken Denethor becoming a mustache twirling villain was one of the major character fuck ups in Return of the King that just wasn’t ok in my book. The others being Frodo sending Sam away (HE. WOULD. NEVER.), the Witch King breaking Gandalf’s staff (HOW. DARE. YOU) and that Elrond looks happy at the end (we all know he wanted Arwen to come and see her mum again and their parting was ‘bitter’ so yeah). ROTK further robbed us of Pippin’s day of adventures in Minas Tirith, the beautiful love story in the houses of healing and the scouring of the shire. Just flying off the rails at the end, I guess.

Since it’s bad karma to leave on a sour note, I want to point out that despite my gripes I honestly do love these movies so much. In my mind, the best way to adapt the trilogy would have been animation (if they choose to do that, I’d be 10000% cool with all the actors reprising their roles for voice acting) and maybe one day there will be a absolutely book faithful animated mini-series for us to enjoy. I get changes have to be made for dramatic reasons (but omg if you kept Sam and Frodo’s journey in time with the books the big drama of TTT is Shelob and therefore no need for a trip to Gondor don’t @ me ffs) and the movies had to have some ‘mass appeal’ but maybe not at the expense of the core of the character? Ramble over. 

[chaos-in-the-making]

Alright, I'm about to tell you guys what I told @thoresque in private.

Apparently some people have expressed the opinion that the Endgame movie was hastily written and produced, which resulted in plot holes and mistreatment of overarching character arcs and stories. That certain things happened because those involved did not use the proper respect and care with the material, and didnt have a solid outline of what would be good for the STORY and the CHARACTERS, instead of what was good for their pocketbooks. Because of this opinion, there has been pushback from others who enjoyed the movie without the same gripping disappointments, saying that we should be GRATEFUL for what was given, because a movie this big and this complicated is practically impossible, was never meant to be perfect, and you cant please everyone.

The problem that I have with this is, that the directors did exactly the opposite. They didnt try to please ANYONE. They wrote their own story that has little to no connection to the previous stories. It's like they hadnt watched the previous 10 films and picked up the characters halfway. I feel the same way about Ragnarok, and how it mutilated my favorite characters. And I LIKED Endgame. Despite liking it, I have some serious problems.

To make my point more clearly, let me shift focus. I am a die hard Lord of the Rings fan. I read The Hobbit in 5th grade, and never looked back. I've read all the books, I could give you all the meta. I know as much about Tolkien as I can, because I adore and respect him as a person and his works are a gift to my life. Fast forward to 2001 when the movies came out. Peter Jackson was told making the movies was an impossible task. Yes, impossible. That it couldn't be done in three movies, there was too much content in the book, and it would fall flat. Yet what happened, you ask? They made three incredible, timeless movies that snatched up no less than 11 awards, sweeping everything else into the dust. It was written and produced with respect and care to the original material, even though they cut a lot of it out. Is the Lord of the Rings trilogy perfect? No. Do some of us fans have some problems with the choices made? Yes. Leaving out Tom Bombadil hurt, but it made directing sense. So we came to terms with it. Giving lines from one character to another irritated me, but overall I can accept it. The characters were real, the story was gripping, and they didnt sacrifice quality for special affects. Every character, and there was a lot, was treated with respect and given closure by the end. High fantasy, impossible to produce, plenty of problems, but God i love those movies so much. Tolkien would be proud.

What Marvel did in this movie sucked ass. The ending they gave Steve would be the equivalent to Aragorn saying at the end of Return of the King, "Nevermind, I dont want to marry Arwen, whom I have loved all my life and is my elf princess and stood by me and helped me through the most difficult journey to overthrow an evil overlord. I'm going to wank off back to Numenor (which is gone and he cant go back to bc it was destroyed) and spend my days with that one chick I kissed that one time. Boromir? Who is Boromir?" This is no disrespect to Peggy Carter, i love her, but it made no gd sense. It also broke the few rules of time travel that the movie set in place. So you make your own rules, and then you break them.

And Thor just... leaving with the Guardians?? Wtf?? After all the talk in Ragnarok about Asgard being a PEOPLE, and how much his people have LOST, and are kind of hopeless? They need stability and leadership, and Thor just... doesnt care??? Not my Thor. If he had told Valkyrie, "hey, I have to go on a quest to find my brother who is very likely no longer dead because of choices made in the past" then I would have accepted it. Even a "I'm going to find a better place for our people now that Earth has all its citizens back" would make sense. Not this "I care more about myself than about the people I was raised to guard, protect, and lead." Wow. Who is this guy? Call it his depression, call it being low, call it self discovery, whatever. To me it rang very false and shallow. When Valkyrie asked when he would be back, he could have said "I will return when I am ready to be the king they deserve". THAT would have been acceptable.

Thors ending would be like Sam completely abandoning Frodo after the ring had been destroyed, deciding not to go back to the Shire to help rebuild (in the book the Shire was destroyed by Saruman), and not caring that his friends and family needed his help. Because he needed to work on himself and eat a salad. Yes, I went there.

So while I enjoyed Endgame, and the shock, and the plot, and the ending, I take serious issue with the way some of the characters were sidelined and completely reduced to something that they werent. I got into Marvel for the relationships. For the heartache and joy that the actors and actresses brought onscreen. Dont tell people to get over it. We were emotionally invested in these movies and this blatant disrespect feels like a betrayal.