#ITS NOT EVEN THAT I THINK ID LOSE THEIR RESPECT

[gilfrespecter]

Listening to coinstar by the growlers and thinking about mel so hard I get nauseous

Ridiculous stream of conscious in the tags apologies but not really

[jesseisquick]

💯

Spread throughout the adaptation of The Corbomite Maneuver’s script are bits and pieces of how Jim sees his captaincy, and it’s fascinating.

Bones calls him out for pushing Lieutenant Bailey too hard, questioning whether Kirk made the decision to promote him based on facts or because he saw something of himself in the young crewman.

From this it sounds more like Kirk might be trying to squash out any illusions in Bailey about serving on a starship, let alone any aspirations towards command. The Naked Time has Kirk bemoaning his inability to fully exercise his desire to love and be loved, because the Enterprise and her crew are of paramount importance. There’s also that last sentence, suggesting Kirk races towards captaincy for the glamour, not fully appreciating what he’d have to give up in exchange.

That in itself is interesting because there isn’t really a strong case that he should have to make a sacrifice out of his personal life- there are members of the Enterprise crew who come from Starfleet families- and that Kirk is martyring himself. He could have those things but there’s still going to be a cost, and judging by the trail of good friends Kirk has left across Federation space, it’s not something he would willingly pay.

Perfection or nothing else because that’s what a Starship Captain demands, followed immediately by how tired he is, how burnt out. Is Kirk asking for perfection to exercise his frustration with the situation they’re in and his situation as captain or because being Perfect means that his personal martyrdom to the image of a Starship Captain makes the sacrifice worthwhile?

Kirk’s also somewhat dismissive and nearly resentful of the crew with the exception of Spock. During the countdown he is sharply aware that how he conducts himself affects the bridge crew, that awareness separates him from them, in his own thoughts putting him outside the community of the bridge crew. Kirk feels that, having seen him pull a rabbit out of his hat at the last minute to save them during previous crises, they’re now dependent on him to pull rabbit after rabbit out of his hat.

At one point he even has to smother his upset with Sulu, who is looking at him with awe. Kirk says he’s bored of excess awe and excess dependency.

The literal next sentence is that Spock isn’t prone to excessive awe or dependency, and Kirk notes that Spock never asks that Kirk pull a rabbit out of his hat. I think there’s some resentment associated with that perceived excess of awe and dependency (not just of Sulu but the whole crew), that he’s the one that always has to come up with the plans, be something more than human, be A Starship Captain.

I think it’s interesting that Spock is, to Kirk, set apart from the crew not only because of his role as First Officer but because he’s the only one who Kirk feels isn’t dependent on him. There’s equality between himself and Spock in a way that he needs desperately and can’t get with the way he’s set up: never breaking the Starship Captain persona for the rest of the crew, being married to the Enterprise (and a faithful husband). The crew can’t see him as a person, and he can’t give himself to any other person because that would be tantamount to adultery.

He loves the Enterprise as much as he resents her, and even though he feels trapped he can’t free himself.

[uracutieraka]

When did you get pretty?

Keigo x Younger!f!reader

Pt.1//Pt.2

slight smut warning, nothing too serious.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

synopsis: you are a UA graduate who just turned 19. Youve known Hawks since he was 20. After 2 years, youre starting to feel differently about the older boy who always seems to conveniently be around you. ◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

”You know that I dont think your ideas are stupid!” “Well then how come my fifth idea has been rejected this year!”

youre going back and forth with your boss, well friend who happens to be your boss, Hawks. youve been at his hero agency since you were 17, when he personally invited you to do a work study under him, only to find out he really just wanted to slack off all day and use you for your ideas.

“Keigo, come on dude. You can totally just tell them to listen to me and to trust me! Honestly i dont understand why you dont come to these pitch meetings with me, you know they wont listen to me!”

“Y/n, i cant go because i dont want to!” “Gah you are such a smartass, honestly im not doing this anymore!”

you get up from your seat across from the witty blond infront of you, sending a pointed and stern look his way.

You had just had yet another unsuccessful meeting with his investors, they didnt trust a 19 year old girl could come up with actually successful business plans. Keigo knew this, but he didnt really care.

“What? Youre not quitting on me, are you?” His eyes grew worried as well as the rest of his face. With an obvious sigh you tell him no. “Im relieved. I love you too much to lose you!”

a strong heat spreads across your body, starting in your cheeks. You werent unfamiliar with the cutesy words he spoke, but that doesnt mean they dont affect you. In fact, they more than affect you. Youve been harboring a dark, dark secret for over 2 years now. ever since you were 16 you had the biggest crush on pro hero Hawks. You even had posters in your room as if he were a member from some boyband. He was only a few years older than you too, so it wasnt unreasonable to like him. “Yeah yeah, i know im so perfect and amazing, who wouldnt?” You shoot a witty and sly smile his way. You normally just counter act any romantic feelings and thoughts with a sassy remark.

“Yeah, i know, i know,” he trails off, looking back up to you he opens his mouth again “But on that topic! Theres this hero-party-but actually work-gala happening tomorrow and i figured it would be a good opportunity for you to mingle with the rest of the pro hero world so i put you down as my plus one.”

You roll your eyes at the lack of respect for your own personal schedule. “Were you even going to check that i didnt have anything going on?” You grumbled out to him. “Uhm, no because i know you dont. You never do. Im your only friend really.” “Well first off, youre not my only friend, second off, i did have plans this weekend but no dont worry, ill cancel them for you, again.” “Again?” The winged man quickly looks at you. “Yeah this is like the fourth time I’ve cancelled on my friend” you already had your phone out typing away on your keyboard. “Wait really? Im so sorry, you dont have to come!” Hes giving you sad eyes, you know he doesnt really mean that. with another loud sigh and eye roll you look at him, “Keigo, its fine, id much rather spend a weekend with you meeting pros than go shopping and see some lame ass movie, if i had an issue id tell you.”

keigo hadnt even thought about the possibility that you still had a life outside of the hero agency, or him really, the more he thought about it, he realized there probably hadnt been a full 24 hours where you hadnt been with him since you graduated almost a year ago.

He was in a fight? You were there helping him. He needed help with extra paperwork? You were there, at the opposite side of his desk doing paperwork with him silently. Hes in the shower? You’re in the bathroom chatting his ear off about some stupid internet drama. He needs help grocery shopping? You’re writing the list for him. Anything he needs, you do. He didnt really take time to appreciate you at all now that he thinks about it.

“Listen, i know you do a lot for me, and i just wanted to say thank you.” Hes looking away from you now with a hand on the back of his neck, his whole demeanor has changed.

“Dude, honestly its fine, you dont have to thank me, i like being with you. Honestly you are my best friend.” You also were looking away from him, down at the boots for your hero costume.

“Youre mine too.” you look up to see him now giving you a soft smile.

“So about this, what did you say it was?” “gala”

“yeah yeah, what do i wear?” “i dont know something nice? You know its a fancy event, suit n tie for me type thing.” “ah i see, i see, uhm ok yeah thatll work” youre in your head mumbling to yourself about it at this point. “Okay….” He drags out the word obviously to drag you back into the present. “Ok well im going home now!” You hurriedly grab your bags and make a break for it, if you stay any longer you wont be able to get home to clean up and get ready for tomorrow.

══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿══

its 6:30 on the dot when you get a call.

“yello?” You say quickly

“hey, im uh, here.” A quiet voice says. “You said 7! What the hell keigo!?!” “yeah yeah just let me up”

You buzz him up to your small, but homey, apartment.

as you hear him knock on your front door you slide your dress up your body holding onto the top as it has yet to be zipped.

You answer the door to see your best friend standing there in a very nice, expensive looking suit. He looked great.

“hey! Come in, its small but it does what its supposed to do!” You say motioning him inside with your free arm.

Keigo realized he had never been to your place, yet you were constantly at his. Like constantly. Honestly he had never even thought about you having your own. You always slept on his couch. He didnt mind though. It was nice not feeling so alone all the time. He liked having you in his life, you treated him normally.

his eyes did a scan over your place

“its cute. Its super you.” He said now looking back at you. He had never seen you soooo… done up? You were honestly such a different person outside of your hero costume, or even your messy buns and large baggy clothes that you always wore at his place. (They had a found a home in a spare drawer in his dresser.)

“Anyways theres only a few things i have left then I’ll be ready,” you had broken the moment of silence, and his intense stare on you. “Can you help me zip this? I thought i could get it on my own but i cant.” you now had your back turned towards him, shutting the door as you did. He hitched his breath, he hadnt ever seen you like this, you were so… calm? And collected? You always seemed so stressed, but he now came to the conclusion that was because of work and his lack of energy for said job.

“sure, yeah.” He said as he stepped towards you to zip your dress. He took you in, in all your glory. You looked so different than normal. Your hair was curled to one side, makeup was light but had the perfect amount of shine, and your dress, well your body looked stunning. How come he had never noticed you like this before?

Your hero costume was tip-toeing the line of scandalous, he knew because he had seen the headlines when he first debuted you at his agency, but he honestly didnt care because he didnt think it really mattered.

But now, here you are in a strapless dress, with a dropped neckline, the fabric is hugging your waist and hips perfectly, the color made your eyes pop and was perfect on you. You looked elegant. So grown up compared to the restless 17 year old he first met.

You had thought the same about him the past few years, he had been turning out to be quite a decent man, he was no longer the hot-shot teen hero you once fangirled over, but the handsome and charismatic man you had grown to be friends with.

turning back towards him you dismissed yourself to finish getting ready in your bathroom.

He now had time to look around your tiny apartment. He walked around looking at all your knick-nacks in the living room until he caught a glimpse of your bedroom door open roughly 10 feet away from where he was standing.

he shouldnt. hes going to anyways.

he made his way to the door peeking inside, it was what he expected, a few clothes scattered on your floor but other than that it was clean. he was scanning your walls when he noticed a very familiar, yet very haunting photo on your wall.

it was a poster he did when he was 17 and freshly debuted in the prohero world. How long had you had this? Have you even been a fan of him for that long?

his thoughts rushed around his head for a brief moment until a devious one creeped up in his head.

you were putting your earrings in, finishing up the last few little things you needed before leaving, when you caught a glimpse of the red wings you became so familiar with at the doorway. You looked over to see Keigo standing there with a mischievous look on his face.

“Uhm, do you need something?” You raised a brow at him. “How long have you loved me? Be honest? Was it when i did my first magazine shoot for that teen magazine?” oh no. He did not seriously look in your room. of course he did. You know him. “DID YOU SERIOUSLY LOOK IN MY ROOM WHAT ARE YOU A PERVERT?”

His face dropped. Oh my god was he really a pervert? “NO I SWEAR, YOUR DOOR WAS OPEN AND I WAS JUST CURIOUS!” “Ugh you are such a brat Keigo! Seriously! Why would you go snooping in a 19 year old girls room! Youre such a douche!” Hes known you long enough to know youre messing with him but you are obviously a bit upset.

“Look, i couldnt help myself i just peeked in and saw that poster! Its cute that you have that is all!” “Honestly, why do you think i was so excited to join your agency? I was obviously a fan.” Another smirk graces his face. “You said ‘was’ sooo are you still or now you know me and think im the worst?” you give him a dirty look and shove past him with a sarcastic huff towards your bedroom. “The ladder!” You sass out to him. He chuckles and makes his way back towards your living room.

A few moments later you emerge from your room and motion for him to head out the front.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰ ───

Its been a long night, youve talked to so many people youve lost track, youre a bit more than tipsy from stealing the ends of keigos drinks all night.

Keigos drunk and has been consistently introducing you to new people as “The future hottest hero of the year!” Or “His right hand lady, y/n”

You two have finally found a moment of peace as you had forced him to sit down a table towards the back of the venue. You lean over to him resting your hand on his knee for balance. “Keigo,” he leans his head towards you and give you a ‘hum’ of acknowledgment, “Im ready to go home.” This brings the man to fully look at you. “Yeah, ok, me too.”

Hes looking at you in the dim lighting of the room, how could he not have ever noticed the way your eyes glitter all the time? Or the softness of your features, they look so good together. He fumbled with his phone and called for his car so you guys could leave.

“Alright lets get going.” He says, standing up wobbling a bit before reaching a hand out to you. You grab it and also stumble a bit when you stand up. before you walk away you lean up to him and whisper in his ear,

“Ive been stealing a bit of your drinks tonight…dont be mad at me, s’wear didnt mean to get like this…” your words are ever so slightly slurred together.

He looks at you and whispers back

“Its ok, i know you have.” a moment of silence goes by before you both start giggling about the situation. after a moment of giggling you decided it was time to make your way down to the car. Pulling the blond behind you, you finally make your exit.

❝ ❞ ✧ ೃ༄

In the car the driver asks Keigo where to go, he looks at you and you look at him and shrug.

“Back to y/n’s place i think. Ill stay there tonight so you can het home finally!” He gives the driver a big close eyed smile. “Of course sir.” and with that you make your way back to your tiny apartment.”

★。＼｜／。★

Youre finally back in your own place after a few minutes of struggling with your keys at the door, it didnt help you had Keigo standing over your shoulder making jokes causing you guys to laugh every 20 seconds.

“UGH! FINALLY!” You say kicking off your heels and locking your front door. “Did you not have fun or something?” Keigo asks, hes already shed his coat and loosened his tie from around his neck. Damn did he look good.

You look back up at him and can feel the blush creep up your face. “Yeah, I did, i like being your plus one, we should do it more often.” You blurt out, not really realizing what you said for a quick beat. “I mean like you know, youre my best friend and were always together, so nothing weird, haha….” that was not confident of you at all. Way to go y/n.

Hes staring at you, your hair is slightly messy, lips are plumped up from the alcohol, makeup is messy, and keigo feels like a predator almost. a desire is stirring inside him. this is bad. Very very bad. Keigos staring at you. Its different than any stare youve felt before from anyone. You feel something stirring inside you. Something bad, very very bad.

“Keigo, uhm look, I like you. And have for a while.” Words are falling out of your mouth faster than you can stop them.

“Y/n, i dont know, what will people think? Youre my trainee.” Hes giving you a serious look, youve never seen him more serious than this (other than when youre fighting villains of course).

you deflate in on yourself and your heart drops. what did you just do.

“but…,” he speaks again “When have i ever cared what people think.”

A few moments go by and suddenly youre grabbing his face and pulling him into yours.

*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*

Your dress is long gone, lost somewhere in your apartment, youll worry about it tomorrow, keigos clothes are littering your floor, mixing with the ones that have already been there of yours. your on his lap on your bed kissing him.

how did you get here?

oh yeah, you were kissing him in the living room then he was pulling your dress off and you were pulling him towards your room. And now youre here.

you stop and look at him, holding his face. “Do you want this? Or are you drunk?” Youre looking into his eyes and studying deeply, you need to know before you make your next move.

“Yes, please, ive never wanted anything more than this right now.” Hes shaking his head, hes begging for you.

“yeah me too.,” youre back to kissing him this time moving your hips since hes perched his hands on them and begun moving you.

theres 2 layers between the two of you. Your underwear, and his. this is it. Everything youve ever wanted is happening right now. The Hawks, is sitting under you begging to have you.

A call suddenly breaks the heavy silence of the room. you know that ringtone. Its the ‘emergency’ ringtone you suggested he set so he never missed one.

you quickly get up snatching his phone out of his pocket and handing it to him.

a few minutes go by with his occasional ‘mhms’

eventually he ends the call. “Yeah, just call me if you need back up.” He turns back at you and begins apologizing, over and over.

Youre telling him its ok and you understand. That youre just happy he doesnt have to go yet.

“Im just happy youre still here Keigo.” “Yeah but i totally just ruined the vibe.” “I dont care, just wanna hangout with you.” “ok, promise youre not mad?” “Yes, i promise im not mad.”

Keigo then hands you a shirt off your floor and puts his button up on over his shoulders, hes too lazy to button it.

“So uh, wanna order a pizza? That food earlier sucked.” He says pointing his thumb back behind him. “yeah, im down.” You say getting up to grab your phone.

pt 2

[amoressb]

☆ LOWKEY

pairings : childhood bsf!riki x reader ; friends to lovers

synopsis : in which you and riki have been best friends since you guys were in kindergarten. youre both now in your last year of high school and with all that time together, people would think that you guys were bound to end up falling for each other, right? well, that seems to only be the case for riki. hes fallen in love with you after all this time, especially since you guys tend to flirt constantly, but he knows you dont feel the same. right? either way, he doesnt want to risk losing you so he tries to keep his love for you on the lowkey. will it work?

☆.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.☆

i dont wanna watch anymore

smau + little written part

previous | masterlist | next

⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊˚ ⋅

once rikis practice finished, you remembered jake wanted to meet at the cafe so you started to gather your stuff. “where you off to pretty?” riki asks confused seeing you pack up faster than before. “oh im going to meet someone at a cafe” you say finished with gathering everything up.

riki didnt want to ask who so he just nods. you grab his arm gently and kiss his cheek. “if i dont msg or call you later ill see you at 6:30 tmr okay?” you smile walking backwards to the door. “alright see you pretty” he waves smiling but having a bad feeling.

you finally arrived at the cafe and waved at jake through the window. he got up and you both hugged each other. “wanna order?” he asks and you said yes. after a bit you both get your drinks and walk out. “alright so where to?” you ask sipping on your drink. he offered the idea of just walking around for now and go into any store that intrigues you both.

you both took the walk as an easy way to catch up. after all it has been a while since you two have hung out. you both expressed how happy and ready you both are for winter break and shared your possible plans. soon after jake found a lego store and you cant believe you forgot how crazy he is for legos. “you can choose any you like im gonna go look around!” as soon as he said that he immediately ran off which left you laughing.

while looking around you found some lego keychains. right there you thought about riki. maybe riki would like to match keychains with you? you smiled at the thought and looked at all the options and came to the conclusion of getting a spiderman and gwen(spiderwoman) keychain. “what did you end up finding?” jake pops up all of a sudden surprising you. “i like these two keychains! this ones for riki so we can match!” you have a huge smile on your face showing him the keychains. jake bought everything and you guys continued to walk.

although jake does like you, like he said he respects riki. so this genuinely makes him happy seeing how even if you two arent around each other, you still find a way to mention riki. this seems to be a good time to bring it up.

“soo ik you and riki are close of course but you ever think of taking if further? or do you see him in any other way?” that question confused you because it was random but it also made you feel something at the mention of riki. did you see riki in another way? then again you had that moment after his practice, you thought he looked ethereal even after he was all sweaty after dancing.

“idk maybe, i did see him a bit different after practice but i try not to. i dont want to risk anything so id say no” and that was his confirmation. yes you two flirt alot but you both do it as a joke even though everyone sees the heart eyes you both have for each other. of course especially riki.

the rest of the evening jake kept bringing the convo back to riki and stating how you should try and show him how you feel. its weird how he kept giving you good advice about it all when youve never even seen him with any girl. heck youve only ever seen him get rejected once. makes you wonder whats he up to?

⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊˚ ⋅

☆.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.☆

*sorry the written part is not too good i was rushing it a bit :(

taglist - @notab1tchwho @ruth-odyssey @kyuremp3 @heartheejake @heenzie @annoyingbitch83 @getoxo @sunooluuvr @moony-mari @luvgiselle @yjwxfxr @crimson-reaper576 @jungwonsjellies @ikeulove @inaisis @jiiyen @stvrriki @keylimejake @seungminsapuppy @who-tf-soddhi @pshwrldd @enhytan @reikaxslvr @i03jae @jkslvsnella @kamfaye @yangjungwonnie @babygirlskz98 @heirdollies @noiiny @brendz00 @gaytron3000 @nctrawberries @aishigrey @h33seungz00 @en-ctzen @bananna-12 @rikidaze @nikistar @lilifiedeans @vixialuvs @strawberrieswithchocolateo3o @jenniferecand @jakeslvt @swanyvess @kittsnewera @rairaiblog @haerinheartss @hooneyz-luver @rikikiynikilcykiki

[heuldoch7b]

while i was gone, i was deeply contemplative about part of what made me take a hiatus in the first place, which is shame. long post forewarning

growing up on the internet (i was 10 when i started using the internet, back in 2010-11) and something i was (and frankly, still am) constantly exposed to was shaming others. ranging from "light hearted" shaming; this ranged from poking fun at an amateur artists work for it looking funny or it being super "tumblry" to shaming with the guise of social justice, you know "hey this artist draws X and thats BAD and if you support them youre JUST AS BAD".

when i was younger i poked fun at other artists and engaged in cancel culture, on a very small scale (just my friends and i) and i regret it. it was entirely due to my own low self esteem and peojecting fear of being made fun of myself. but ive retained that fear, even as i've matured and grown to understand how unkind it is to shame and mock others, ESPECIALLY as myself a weird, autistic artist who draws "cringe but free" stuff

and even with regards to problematic content, stuff that, reasonably more often than not, ellicits a "yuck" reaction out of most viewers, has turned more into a genuine social risk of getting a callout over being immoral or gross and losing your social circles and delving into isolation. this happened to me. i think it genuinely messed me up, and im dealing with it even now.

it has lead me to be avoidant of being honest about what i like, and being afraid of befriending others due to fear of being dropped again. this is of course not fair to you, potential reader, but unfair to myself as well. i want to develop a healthier respect for my friends as well as myself about what i do and dont like, and not feeling guilty for saying no or not liking something.

i think, as i remake my old pinned post, i am going to be more explicit on stuff, i like shipping the primarchs! i love it very much even. and if you do not thats absolutely A-OK. i like drawing the dismal warcriminals as genderweird. i like maybe skirting away from how chronically cynical and dour the universe (which i do still enjoy, im into warhammer FOR warhammer) and making silly, comfy stuff. fuck i LOVE drawing weird heroic nudity mythological scenes where some characters are like, centaurs, cause its sick as fuck.

and with all that i myself need to be okay with maybe people who i enjoy their work of dont really jive with all that, and that isnt the end of the world, its just being honest with oneself, and thats really important to do. i will be trying to maybe tag sensitive stuff like primarchcest better, so people can filter it out, but i am not gonna be hypervigilant about tagging everything because that would make me neurotic and id rather just be unfollowed or blocked at that point.

anywho, i really just wanted to put my thoughts down into words and share them, i honestly wrote this out and deleted it like 3 times already due to, hilariously, shame. but this is a really important topic to me and extremely relevant to my social presence on this website. i care for you all immensely, even if we are all strangers online.

i will be sad if i lose potential friendships over the things i like, but theres literally thousands of people if not more on this website, and it so fine and healthy to go like "eh no i dont want that in my life" to something like someones specific fuckin fandom art LOL

if any of you want to talk to me about your experiences with shame, id welcome it, may it be through a reblog or messaging me personally. i think its really important for all of us to be unashamed, mindful of course, but not stifling ourselves. be free have fun type stuff. i hope i can drop my own shackles too. thanks for reading

[vanalex]

Q: Isn't paganism a form of spirituality?

Pete: "Not the way I define it. I have the ultimate respect for nature. I consider myself to be an evolutionist. I find beauty in all things natural. My girlfriend and I like to go to the woods and look at leaves, almost like neo-hippies, getting into everything around us. That, to me, is paganism, respecting life. Everything has a right to live. In this band, we don't think that respect has to be earned. We think that respect should be given, until you realize that you're dealing with an asshole. Then you either try to walk away or break their legs.

"Most ancient cultures-- Nordic, Native American, Orientals-- all have the same beliefs. As we get further and further away from our animal nature, we start to lose touch with the id and become species who think we're better than anything else because we walk on two legs. For everything we create, we destroy 100 times."

Josh: "The planet will go on happily without us. I'm looking forward to it. Some people say that's a really negative attitude. That's not negative, that's totally positive."

Pete: It's nature's way.

Josh: "We'd be doing the planet a favor by getting rid of all the people on earth. It knows what to do. It's doing the right thing, and we can't stop it no matter how hard we try."

Q: Unless humankind changes its destructive ways.

Josh: "Yeah, can you imagine that? The common man changing his viewpoint? One hundred percent of humanity cooperating to make the world a better place? That's a great fairy tale, but it ain't gonna happen, man. Sorry."

Pete: "People will not change, especially when the media dictates values. That's really scary to me."

Josh: "What's even scarier is when they allow it to happen. It's one thing to be told what to do, it's another thing to be quiet and doing it.

Q: Like sheep.

Josh: "Exactly. Human nature is to destroy. If everyone was the same color, there'd be a new reason to kill each other."

Pete: "It would be, like, how a person smelled differently. There is always some reason to fight. My family comes from Brooklyn, where there is Irish, Italian, German. All these people look the same, but they fought every day, because they were from a different part of Europe."

~Peter Steele and Josh Silver~ Aquarian Interview 1995

[note: I realize the term "Orientals" is considered pretty outdated and racist today, but remember, Pete and the rest of the band grew up in the 70s and 80s, and that term was used quite a bit with no inherently negative undertones. I'm guessing most of my fellow 20th century people will probably remember this.]

[plaidos]

oh my god i unfollowed that guy youre clowning on like a week ago bc he had the stupidest taste on sex scenes id ever seen and now im losing my shit at everything he says. like yes im a trans guy who doesnt pass i know it sucks and i think there is things to be talked about irt that but just saying "trans men have no power over cis women" is CRAZYYYYYYYYY like use your brain for 2 seconds man cmon...

it’s crazy bonkers how often trans guys will see the sentiment “men benefit from male privilege & patriarchy above women, yes, even trans men” and then rush to misinterpret it as “all trans men always benefit above all cis women and are completely respected and valued by the patriarchy in all circumstances” which just isn’t something anybody actually believes, much least transfeminists; imo its an attempt to move the goalposts & portray trans woman as hysterical.

it is pretty obvious to me that “transmascs don’t have any institutional benefits over any women, because the patriarchy doesn’t see them as men” is the literal exact same argument as “black men don’t have any institutional benefits over any women, because the patriarchy doesn’t see them as men”.

like of course you can (and should) recognise the difference in how black and white men are treated, white women’s white privilege above black men etc. but abstracting that to “black men can’t oppress white women” or even the reverse is like… a comical childish misunderstanding of privilege & institutional power & intersectional feminism. “(male minority) doesn’t have power over (female non-minority)” is an antifeminist misdirect; we can talk about the unique ways that trans men and men of color (and other marginalised men!) experience violence & the ways they disbenefit under less marginalised women without saying “institutional sexism & the patriarchy don’t exist, and if they do, their society-wide implications & effects magically only apply to specifically white cis men”. it’s antifeminist nonsense that frames “male privilege” as interpersonal circumstances rather than an institutional cultural power structure and it’s a racist & transphobic as hell argument to boot, especially to the women of those communities who suffer comparatively to their male equivalents!

[cressidagrey]

(have to send this as an ask because i'm afraid this is too long to sent as a comment under the chapter like i usually do 😅)

THEY GOT ENGAGED AND MARRIED IN THE SPAN OF LIKE 24 HOURS I'M SCREAMING i love them so much 😭 "we have IDs and lando owns a suit" HAHAHAHAHA i'd weep from happiness if i wasn't manically vibrating from it instead, this chapter is *phenomenal*. emilie is the best friend everyone deserves, it's her world and we're just living in it. i LOVE the groupchat chaos, hahahahahaha! lando just dropping the photos with no prior announcement, alex's "rings and flowers and a whole emilie in the background" i'm SCREAMING 😭 RUMOURS THINKING OSCAR AND LILY GOT MARRIED I- KSDJSKDHSKJSKS i *was* wondering how nobody noticed in a place as saturated with celebrities and general lack of respect for their privacy as monaco. NICOLE'S REACTION THOUGH 😭😭😭😭 not the rumours *immediately* switching onto lando 😆 poor guy just canNOT get a break, hahaha.

real talk now, though. i know we all very much don't like the leclercs here FOR GOOD REASON but i can't even BEGIN to imagine the reaction once they find out, like, once all the emotions settle and the dread and realisations set in. how do you even begin to come to terms with the fact that you neglected one of your loved ones to the point they want *nothing* to do with you. to the point your supposedly beloved daughter or sister doesn't want you present during one of the happiest moments of her life. like, good for belle and i'm *definitely* team anti-leclers this entire series, but can you imagine? can you imagine. they're gonna ignore their way into not even realising max and belle, sooner or later, have children!!!! THEN how do you deal with learning about it???? they're not even particularly hiding they're together all that much, a good half of the grid knows!!!!!!! and i already suspect belle is pregnant!!! gods forbid they see her with a bump and go on another of their weird tangents, especially charles. and that's whether she's already pregnant or will be in the future. just. my god. i have so many emotions about this. this series in just phenomenal. so good. SO good. and this chapter was just amazing. literally an injection of happiness. i can't wait for more, i'm so excited!!!!

This message is such a joy to read — chaotic in the best possible way, full of love, full of giddy screaming, and absolutely spot-on in its insights (and suspicions 👀).

First of all: YES. Yes to Max and Belle doing the most them thing ever and just saying, “Screw it, let’s get married now.” Yes to Lando being unhinged in a way only Lando could be. Yes to Nicole losing her mind while the media loses the plot. And yes, yes, yes to Emilie being the tactical genius behind the best surprise wedding Monaco never saw coming.

But then you hit me with the real talk — and wow. You're so right. That delayed horror the Leclercs will feel when it finally dawns on them that they missed everything? That Belle didn’t forget to tell them. She chose not to. Because she didn’t feel safe or loved enough to share those moments with them? That is going to hurt like hell. And deservedly so. Because you’re right: how do you come back from that? From realizing the person you claimed to love trusted complete strangers over you when it came to the most joyful and vulnerable moments of her life?

I'm so grateful you took the time to write all this. And I'm thrilled to hear you’re screaming and vibrating your way through it, because same. More chaos is coming. More consequences. And absolutely more group chat mayhem.

[zachsbees]

Hi yes so I have a hanzo headcanon id like to share.

When hanzo first joins overwatch, for obvious reasons, most of the other members don’t trust him. Some more openly than others. But it’s something hanzo expected. Whether it hurts him or not, he understands. Maybe even respects them more for it, for their loyalty.

(And it does hurt. He probably doesn’t even realize that their coldness stings because of his own emotional constipation, a lack of understanding when it comes to his own feelings, but it damages all the same in its own quiet way)

I think it’d be Cole that’d be the one to make his distaste most known, sneering and passive aggressive. Genji is one of his closest friends; he got to see firsthand exactly how horrifically hanzo mutilated his own brother. Family is a sensitive topic for him. How could he ever even consider trusting a kin slayer?

Regardless, hanzo can handle their different flavors of distaste. It takes a lot more than some mean spirited words (and a particularly threatening warning from Cole) to break him. He’s not there for them anyway; he’s there for genji alone.

But I think Cole would end up taking it a step further into violent territory, maybe not even fully aware of it. Like. Maybe they’re sparring or something and things start getting a little too violent. Hanzo isn’t an idiot; he sees exactly what’s going on almost immediately. How cole’s face darkens with vengeful anger. How his blows become sharper, deadly intent growing with each miss. Cole is getting lost in his own anger— bubbling to the surface after a lifetime of stewing.

Because it’s not just about hanzo’s mistake. It’s about cole’s anger over losing the people he cares about. His own insecurity.

And hanzo? He isn’t about to let that shit fly. There is no honor is dying to a teammate in a petty brawl, or potentially getting each other killed during a mission over a grudge that leaks onto the battlefield.

Which is exactly what hanzo lays out, plainly, bluntly, and in much more sophisticated words than I can come up with. But this next line I thought up, this is important, the one that brought this idea to me in the first place:

“You will not steal my brother’s revenge from him. I will not allow it.”

And he’s deadly serious. Because the only person that hanzo would ever let kill him would be genji. Period. And he will wait for that day for the rest of his life.

Hanzo then proceeds to gracefully kick cole’s ass to the mat. Cole is talented, he was in blackwatch and trained under Gabriel after all, but he’s not as good as a man who’s been trained to be an assassin from birth.

The gunslinger has a bit more respect for hanzo after that, albeit begrudgingly.

(And if you wanna get yeehan with it, maybe he’s a little turned on too. I could see him being into someone who can kick his ass, and hanzo would certainly look gorgeous doing it)

[qoldenskies]

same anon!! i feel validated so yes to everything you said. it was “Taking Care of your Brothers: A Two-part guide by Mikey and Donnie” by Calliopes_Anon that really made me change my perspective on how these two might act, particularly the mikey chapter simply because we get to see him look out for donnie as much as don looks out for him

and i think the fact there even was a mikey pov, much less one as thoughtful and detailed as that one is, helped a lot. because like. i can’t think of another fic envisioning this pre-movie state with a mike that isn’t constantly scared. kinda eye-opening for me lol

and yeah i do like the sorta ‘i don’t know if it can be fixed’ vs ‘i don’t know how it can be fixed’ mindsets from them and gosh i wish they didn’t take such a backseat during the movie bc i would’ve loved to see them have more of a reaction to the other two than just mild concern. i’d like to explore a version of the movie where they are frustrated, dare i say resentful, with their older brothers because ‘yeah raph can argue how much leo’s new attitude and its consequences are affecting the team. but does raph even understand that extent?’ it’d prob be a whole movie rewrite due to the fact it’s so raph and leo heavy, but isn’t that the beauty of fanfic

oh and yes to your point about donnie’s neurodivergence bc as sweet as it is to see him in fics gifting mikey his own noise blocking headphones, mikey would probably yell at them to shut up for five seconds before putting dons on his head for him

would love to see that pre-movie fic of yours one day!!

yeah with the neurodivergence thing i do genuinely feel like it would go the other way around cause like ,,, donnie is SO jumpy in canon. unexpected loud noise will even make him fall over sometimes, which means he's particularly sound-sensitive. and as a person with a trait exactly like that, i cannot handle shouting. at all. even when i expect it, it completely throws me off my game and scares the shit out of me. like i usually write it so donnie already struggles to handle getting yelled at, but i could see being in the proximity of it freaking him out too.

i do think that'd be one of those things that would piss off mikey in particular because as much as they make fun of each other and get fed up with each other, it's such an obvious and easy boundary to respect in his eyes. mikey can definitely handle yelling, even if it upsets him to see them arguing, but he would hate it because donnie very much cannot. he'd probably at least snap at them to stop or go do it elsewhere lmao

and resentment towards something like this kind of depends on just how bad raph and leo's dynamic actually was, because while its pretty heavily implied they've been arguing like this kind of continuously (especially based on their talk before they go on that mission that has them lose the key), raph's "i have to look out for you or you could all end up dead" talk feels like something that's ,,, new? considering how leo reacts to it initially before pretending to brush it off. maybe leo just normally derails the conversation faster, or normally they dont have arguments like this in private lmao

definitely what fic's for ,,,, raph and leo kind of going back to the dynamic they had in bug busters (but reversed, and likely more intense) while donnie and mikey kind of pair off together is a really interesting thing to play around with, especially with how they naturally they just go and stick close to each other in the movie (easy way to connect that to them gravitating towards each other with everything going on), ive just never really seen it in the exact Flavor that id want to see so maybe ill check out the fic you recc'd ,,, gotta expand my tastes fr

[delusinalandpassionate]

Gonna throw a theory at you my fellow DQ fan. The kick off for DQ’s development is gonna be Rocinante. If she has to face reality, or people are going to force her to like in the books, then something has to happen to those shoes. But it’s not gonna be simple. Don Quixote is never going to take them off willingly and, unlike her book counterpart, she would be much harder to trick and trap. Bloodfiends respect hierarchy and DQ would probably destroy anyone who isn’t on or above her level. And elder bloodfiends don’t seem to go for direct confrontations unless the situation calls for it.

So they are going to wait for her to come to them and force her hand.

Hear me out. The flashback mentions that DQ never takes her shoes off, not even to get cleaned, and it shows. Rocinante clearly isn’t self maintaining, so how long can those shoes go before they are completely worn out? And as they wear out, do they lose effectiveness? For the second question, I think they do. I think some of what we see that foreshadows her bloodfiends status is because the shoes are wearing down. You can’t ride a horse all time is unless you want to work it to death, not even a metaphorical one like Rocinante. And if Inner Don wants her shoes fixed she’s gonna have to visit someone who has to be very high up on the hierarchy, or at least very powerful, if they can make an artifact that can bind her powers and memory. Someone, who if cooperative, would be perfect to be a part of the trap to force an elder bloodfiend back to her role.

There’s probably holes in this theory but if DQ is going to be backed into a corner and forced into reality, it is because something happened to Rocinante where she cannot retreat back into the dream and forget about everything.

Okay it's actually a very cool theory, thank you for sharing it.

I personally think that Don Quixote didn't lie and that Rocinante is in a "pristine condition", just its original look is unappealing. But I would be excited if your theory became truth, too.

I guess you corrected about losing Rocinante by the end of Canto which could create interesting pattern with Heatcliff Multitrack ID not having the Ring.

Interesting if they go further and will get Hong Lu with eyepatch?

[aspiritdrawings]

Heather McNamara Character analysis

(This analysis will use both info from the musical and the 1989 movie. Therefore SPOILER WARNING)

As we all know Heather McNamara is a part of the trio of the Heathers with Chandler and Duke, being the 'vice president' of the trio. All the Heathers have a respective color, Mc's is yellow so lets analyse this:

As we see yellow has a lot of positive affiliations, and Mcnamara does start off to be the most stable Heather, the nicer one even tho she was always way too passive and compliant which made her also a bully. Another few words that i think would be important to mention are "betrayal, hope, and cowardice": starting off with the last one as we already said McNamara was always too compliant and afraid to step in to stop the evil doings that Chandler was doing, aka cowardice, she was also too much of a coward to step up against Duke, again, cowardice. Then we have hope, the one that we see Heather losing through the movie, and it can be represented by her clothes:

Mcnamara at the start of the movie when everything's alright 🔼

McNamara before her suicide attempt🔼, before this we also see numerous more black outfits (the jacket at the start of the movie which in my opinion is foreshadowing of the sufferin Heather is hiding, the funeral outfit, her 'date' with kurt, and when she finds out Kurt and Ram died).

This is a perfect metaphor of the fact that towards the end of the movie she loses all hope for the future, wearing less and less yellow and more black, theres also a hint of red in the attempt outfit which symbolises the fact that she was trying to get ahold of her life back (red symbolises strength and power).

Another outfit about this that id like to mention is this one 🔽

When she comes with Duke to Veronica's house to announce Martha's attempt, this is the most yellow we have ever seen her wearing and its a pretty strong shade too. But this doesn't mean that she had hope, its a metaphor of her trying to make others think she was happy.

Moving on to the last word of the symbolism, aka 'betrayal', the betrayal that she felt from Duke when the girl exposed her depressive and suicidal thoughts to the whole class, or even the whole school.

Another two outfits that id like to mention for this analysis is:

This is the outfit Heather wore after finding out Chandler died, first of all we can notice how everything clashes a lot more than her other outfits, and also the blue sweater. Knowing Mcnamara's nature as a follower she was probably hinting to Veronica that if she would have became the new queen bee as a replacement to the red Heather she would have followed, this is also shown by the fact that she gives her one of Chandler's old watches.

This is the outfit that she wore for the date with Kurt, its extremely dark with no hint of color and yellow at all. It had many layers and its something most people would think as unattractive, that was the point. She knew what was gonna happen thats also why she asked Veronica to come with her and tried to make the situation more unlikely by dressing messily, but it didn't. And Veronica left her to get r4ped.

What was the thing that made Heather M snap?

A lot of people think that it was Kurt, Ram, and Heather C's death or maybe Duke's bullying, and while they are what made the situation worse that was not what made the problems start. In the call with the radio Heather mentions how her parents divorced for example, and in lifeboat she says how she had always felt pressured and obligated to conform or else she'd be "thrown over to the side", in lifeboat M's suicidal mindset is also extremely clear with "the weakest must go".

Heather's problems were always there, and she probably planned on ending it at school even without Duke's betrayal since she did take the pills to school with her.

First she felt pressured, then her parents divorced, then her very best friend died because of suicide (or thats how she thought) and she was probably the only person at the funeral who cared, then she got raped and betrayed by who she thought it was her friend because of a slushy, and then the boys who violated her died because of a "suicide" too and because or repressed homosexuality and now you might think "since they raped her, wouldn't she be happy they died?" And while yes that is true and we dont know what M's thoughts at the funeral were, imagine getting molested and finding out it was because they were gay therefore your trauma was just them trying to convince themselves they liked girls, obviously she felt horrible anyways.

Veronica is what gave her hope, what snapped her back to reality by telling her that "becoming a small number in a percentage" wouldn't fix anything.

[gorgugplushie]

can you tell us abt how you read dandys. deal. like whats wrong with him. and whys he like that . whats his favorite manipulation tactic. does he like waffles? idk if this is weird enough but maybe its a chance to talk

OF COURSE.

my overall reading of Dandy is him being the first toon created so obvs he was the first toon experimented and tested on, exposed to the horrors what not, so he KNOWS what the handlers and founders can do if he ever messes up etc. he's ultra aware of having to be perfect and fit this image of who Dandy is.

my hc is that he was completely nonverbal during his creation,Arthur leaned toward a gentler approach with teaching him how to speak while Dehiliah felt the need to rush the progress with introducing more ichor into dandys system, it works but the progress is horribly traumatizing to dandy and leads him to lose all trust in humans.

humans are the bad ones who are keeping him and the others in gardeview, to him the toons have ZERO anatomy because it could just be taken away from them in seconds, they could easily be replaced if not doing well, and the humans make their respective existances MISRABLE with things like how holiday toons hibernate most of the year. dandy sees all of this as pure torture, he believes humans are overtly arrogant and playing god etc.

bc of that he feels like it falls upon him to protect the other toons even if it harms them in the long run, he needs to be strong to protect them all, they need to hone their abilities, to break free, and return home to the digital land scape of the dandys world show. which is dandys ultimate goal, return home or escape garden view.

he has a weird realationship with his cartoon self. bc as much as he wants to be that dandy he cant bc of the fucked up situations he finds himself in. he idolizes yet resents that dandy. he doesn't even know if he cant really be called dandy since he continues to fail everyone's expectations of him. idk.

i dont think twisteds were really dandys idea. its delilahs (something she made to piss off arthur when gardenview started going under etc idk. too get back at him for having the credit of toons basically) but he did spread it and run w it.

his fav manipulation tactic.. well. id say its being overtly friendly and personal... lulling toons into believing he's the ONLY one who can help them, making them entirely co-dependant on him, making them mistrustful or warry of the others. he's extremely touchy but I actually see him as touch repulsed, to him touch is a reward or a punishment nothing more than that.

i think hed like waffles... i think hed like simple foods... anything that's diff than what toons usually are fed.

overall he means well but hes just incredibly fucked in the head.

sorry for the long ass essay i like him. I HAVE MOER TO SAYYY.

read my fics also on ao3 bc I write a lot abt dandy and get into his head.

[inamagicalhallucination]

I think we can all agree there is a good chance Dazai is chosen by Mori for the Mafia/Ada switch

So what if during Dazai's re-initiation, Mori permanently marks him as 'Mafia property' by blinding his right eye (the side the bandages were on)

And he does it infront of the entire Ada + Chuuya (and maybe akutagawa)

He doesn't tell anyone he's going to do it either, so after Dazai swears his loyalty and switches into his new mafia jacket, no one expected Mori to take out his scalpel, and drag it across Dazai's eye

Whether he goes blind in that eye right then and there, or he goes blind after the surgery that follows

It would make an example of him as well as saying 'This is a permanent of reminder where you stand, where you will stay, and where your loyalties will forever lie'

he'd get his ass handed to him by fukuzawa im afraid

tbh im not sure i think dazai's gonna go back to the pm and even if he does -- or actually this applies to whoever goes, theyre still important to the ada

i dont think its fair to say that once they leave they just wont matter to the ada or have the ada/fukuzawa's protection -- whoever it may be, if mori actually crosses a line like that, he'd be putting the alliance at danger -- and for all that fukuzawa has to tread carefully becuz of said alliance so does mori;; like a lot of people will comment on fukuzawa's hands being tied becuz of the alliance but i dont think that's a fair assessment -- yeah the ada is smaller, but they've been handling the pm for a hot second -- the ada is like a handful of people but they're toe to toe to the biggest organizations despite that becuz what they might lack in manpower they make up with just insanely strong and competent people and sure there may be some restrictions fukuzawa has becuz of the alliance but those apply to mori as well

either way although i think mori could try to get that message across he wouldn't do it so obviously, like mind games and manipulation over just that ya know?

anyway that's just my two cents

in terms of the actual headcanon

on the off chance that he does try and ranpo doesn't predict it and dazai doesn't dodge it, i think it'd be a quick way to start losing a lot of the respect he's garnered -- like yeah ppl fear mori but his subordinates respect him too; and again, fukuzawa + the ada

still though, id be interested in seeing wut others think of this

[shreddeddescent]

also im not like. sad abt losing followers for my own sake, cuz id imagine its people who arent even aware of everything going on here? its more like... i dunno, im really just wishing people would be nice to others, cuz i dont want anyone who enjoys my stuff to think theyre not allowed to do that. and if they make art that might be weird in a different way, they still get to make it. you dont have to engage but you dont get to sit here enjoying my adorable babies with fucked up origins while like.... being a dick to people who do something similar. thats where im at. pot kettle. self reflect on your own traumas and your own disgust and your own limits. learn your icks, respect them, learn others. respect them.

[lightontainted-ask]

TSAC: Greetings! My name is Three Stars Above Clouds. I am Director of the Zenith Stellar Observatory Consortium and Lead Archivist of the Zenith Data Archives.

I have a question for Missing Link of Chain. It is to my understanding that you have curated quite an impressive collection of historical records, and I was curious to learn more about your archival methods.

I maintain a large archive of my own, primarily used to store observational and scientific data. My own archives are primarily data pearl-based; this storage method allows large data payloads from my telescopes to be moved relatively quickly, and also facilitates fast data read/write speeds. However this method of data archival has its limits- for instance it is quite inefficient in the storage of high-resolution qualia, which tends to rapidly exceed normal data pearl memory limits.

I am eager to learn about your own data storage techniques, given the contrast between our respective duties. What kind of information do you maintain in your own archives, and how is it stored? Do you have any particular preferences when it comes to data organization? Are you aided by scholars in the curation of your archives? Do you have any records on hand that you are willing to share?

Please excuse my bevy of questions; I am simply curious about your work. I hope this message finds you well and I wish you good luck in your endeavors. (@threestarsaboveclouds) (ooc: I hope this gives you some worldbuilding stuff to chew on lol. Enjoy)

Hello TSAC! I'd be very happy to answer all your questions, from one archival iterator to another.

About my archival methods- I think you'll find it apparent I don't use many pearls. They fade over time if not cared for properly, and I store far too much data to be stored in a pearl network. Besides, they're particularly easy for me to lose...

Rather, I've taken a long-term storage method that uses purposed organisms to store massive amounts of data in the form of qualia, text, images, audio, and so on. You may even recognize similar organisms around many citadels, storing the memories of those who've ascended. These neural amalgams are stored and grown in large biometal and glass buildings atop my can, towering about as tall as any city, and sprawling even wider. It can be either horrifying or beautiful depending on your tastes. Or neither, if you're me.

This, of course has upsides and downsides. The upside is that this storage method lasts for a very, very long time. However, retrieving the data again is not as optimized. This is not a problem for me, as much of what I store is... rather useless anyways.

Which is what my main job is. Anybody can store data in some neural meat. But that data is scrambled and unorganized, I make sure that everything is properly formatted and easy to find again through a system of complex tags and IDs identified to every segment of data and- actually I'll save that explanation for another time.

My time is more spent organizing rather than going out to find documents myself. Over 99% of the data stored in my archives have been donated to me by scholars, volunteers, companies, and other iterators!

Normally, this would be an easy task. Even easier for me, as I've been designed with a larger processing strata and memory conflux in order to run more parallel processes, but even still, I estimate I'd collapse before I fulled tagged, ID'd, and sorted everything.

Luckily there's a priority system for donated data so I'd get through all the actually useful documents first.

I hope this may satisfy some of your curiosities.

(-ooc, I was going to draw the structures mentioned, but I really don't want to anymore. Here's a wip! Yes I know it shows nothing. Just imagined Memory Crypts but very very tall. And a little less shaded.)