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d20-lesbian · 7 months ago

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AFTER AN OVERWHELMING WAVE OF SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT, I'VE DECIDED TO POST THE WILL WOOD ESSAY!!!! it's below the break !!!!

I would like to really quickly state though that this essay is my property, I put a lot of time and effort into this, so please don't claim it as your own !!!! thank you <33

I will be analysing Will Wood’s song ‘Suburbia Overture / Greetings from Marybell Township! / (Vampire) Culture / Love Me, Normally’. which, for simplicity, most fans refer to as simply ‘Suburbia Overture’. This song is the first on his first solo album entitled ‘The Normal Album’, which came out in July 2020.

This song, in the most general possible terms, is a criticism of modern suburban life, how it is advertised as “the perfect life”, and how this advertising is incredibly false unless you fit the picture perfect standard that these facets of society seem to require.

The song itself is split up into 3 distinct sections, "Greetings from The Marybell Township!", “(Vampire) Culture” and “Love Me, Normally”. I'll be tackling each section one at a time in order to properly break down what each means, what different analogies they use, how they all relate to each other and the intended end result of the song and the message it intends to convey.

Let's begin with 'Greetings from The Marybell Township!'.

This section of the song uses a lot of analogies that compare suburban life to a warzone, the first line of this section being “white picket fences, barbed wire and trenches”. This section also focuses heavily on the concept of the nuclear family, and it often literalises the term and uses analogies based around radiation and nuclear warfare. Such analogies can be found in lines such as “the snap crackle pop of the Geiger, camouflage billboards for lead lined Brookes Brothers”. Now there's a couple of terms that require definitions in this line. The first of course being “the Geiger”. A Geiger counter, which is what this lyric is referring to, is a tool used to measure levels of harmful radiation. This, paired with the concept of billboards advertising “lead-lined Brookes Brothers” when lead is a material used to deflect radiation, and the knowledge that ‘Brookes Brothers’ is an American vintage style clothing brand, this line really paints a picture of a seemingly post apocalyptic/post nuclear war but still consumerist and capitalistic suburban society. The last line in that verse is “buy now or die”, which ties back to the concept of safety equipment being advertised on billboards, while residents of this town have no choice but to buy the products. This all relates back to the hyperconsumerism that plagues our society, and runs particularly rampant in middle to upper middle class neighbourhoods. The very same neighbourhoods that are often referred to as “suburban”

In the second verse of this section there are a lot of hard hitting lyrics that to me really show that this perfect idealised life is far from perfect or even good, so we will work through them one by one because I feel that they all deserve proper analysis.

The first line that i want to point out from that verse is the line “takes a village to fake a whole culture” which is clearly a rip off of the phrase “it takes a village [to raise a child]” but it also references the fact that usually suburban towns are incredibly monotonous in both residents and architecture, and so it takes the collective effort of the entire population of the town to pretend that there is an actual culture to it.

The next few lines I'll speak on all come in quick succession of one another, essentially blending them into one line.

“Your ear to the playground, your eye on the ball, your head in the gutter, your brains on the wall.”

So let's break these down. This line is easily split into 4 distinct phrases, and all of these phrases have a few things in common, which I will point out later.

“Your ear to the playground” is a play on the phrase “ear to the ground” which essentially means that the person with their ‘ear to the ground’ is attempting to carefully gather intel about something. Someone having their ear to the playground simply reinforces the idea of this suburban “paradise” being. Not as paradise-y as one would hope, seeing as the people who use playgrounds most of all are children, so this line is demonstrating that the picture perfect life that this suburban town offers is actually corrupting children so young that they are still on the playground.

The next phrase is “your eye on the ball” isn't a play on anything and is in fact in itself a common phrase. To have your eye on the ball means to be entirely focused in and paying attention to something, and not allowing anything to divert your attention. Given the last line this line very well could be another reference to the corruption of the youth and the idea that their every day play has already been tainted with the hostilities of modern life usually reserved for adults.

Following this is another well known saying “your head in the gutter” which, as most know, someone whos head is ‘in the gutter’ is someone who will see some sort of innuendo or otherwise vulgar/inappropriate meaning in something that was intended to be entirely innocent, leading to others in the interaction telling the perpetrator to ‘get [their] mind out of the gutter’

And finally, in my opinion the most hard hitting phrase in this set, “your brains on the wall” which is clearly in reference to the notion of ending your own life with a shot to the head, which would lead to, well, brains being on the wall. These last 2 phrases come in stark contrast to the seemingly picture perfect life that suburban towns offer and advertise, the concepts of suicide and perversion are not concepts one expects to see or hear when imagining this idealised form of life.

There is one main similarity in each of the 4 phrases, that being that each phrase has some body part being on something else, your ear to the playground, your eye on the ball, your head in the gutter, your brains on the wall. This similarity almost offers a body horror aspect to the song, which when paired with the concept that this is written about a seemingly post nuclear apocalyptic town presents an interesting idea of possible mutation, but i'll be the first to admit that may be a little far fetched. However that's not the only similarity that these 4 phrases share, another is the fact that they are all directly, or only slightly modified versions of already well known phrases, a similarity that is found in many lines over this entire song, through all 3 sections.

I want to analyse a few more lines before we move on to the second section of the song.

This next line comes directly after the previously analysed line, and it goes “home is where the heart is, you ain't homeless, but you’re heartless”

Sticking with the theme of using already existing and commonly used phrases, “home is where the heart is'' is once again a phrase that you could likely find as a cross stitch hung up on the wall of any of the homogenous houses you could likely find in this idealised suburbia. But what Wood is saying in this line is that home is where the heart is, and that while people in this town may not be homeless, they are certainly heartless, meaning that they in fact don't have homes. They have houses. Rows upon rows of houses that all look the exact same in the horrifying monotony that is suburban living.

Following this line is the lyric “it's the safest on the market, but you still gotta watch where you park it”. These lines seem to be in reference to buying a car. The car being the "safest on the market" is likely in reference to the fact that it may have a lot of safety features. But this is immediately negated by the fact that you “still gotta watch where you park it” meaning that the safety features could be a reason that the car gets stolen, rendering all the safety that those features offered useless because in the end it made the car and the owner less safe.

In the third verse of this section, you immediately hear the line “so give me your half-life crisis” which partially is a play on the term ‘mid life crisis’ wherein which one realises that they may have wasted their life up till that point and they're already halfway through, but the use of the term “half-life” instead of ‘mid-life’ is very intentional, as the term “half-life” can also be used to refer to the half-life of an isotope, which is the amount of time that isotope takes to lose half of its radiation, which ties back into the theme of radiation that we see mentioned a lot in this section.

Later in the same verse is the line “if it's true that a snowflake only matters in a blizzard”, which is interesting in a few ways, first, it brings up the idea of a singular individual means nothing on their own and that they only matter when they’re part of something larger or a larger group, but i also think that the use of the terms “snowflake” and “blizzard” instead of something like ‘raindrop’ and ‘storm’ is very intentional in the fact that snowflakes are known for being individual, none are alike, every single one is different. So saying that a snowflake doesn't matter unless it's in a blizzard is yet another hit at individuality, essentially implying that in this town individuality means nothing and is essentially rendered useless.

The final line in this verse is “everybody's all up in my-” repeated thrice, and on the third time the sentence is finished to say “everybody’s all up in my business” and before the word “business” can be finished its overlapped with the beginning of the chorus, the first word of which is a very loud “SUBURBIAAAA!”. I believe this is reminiscent of the fact that in towns like this, everyone cares so much about what everyone else is doing, they’re all so interested in everyone else's business, and i think that sentiment being stated and cut off by the word “Suburbia” is essentially saying that ‘this is the norm, this is just Suburbia, this is how it works around here.’

After the final chorus of this section, in the final verse, you'll find the line “chameleon peacocks are talk of the town” which particularly interests me because if you know anything about chameleons or peacocks you’d find that they seem incredibly different as animals. Chameleons blend into their environment in order to stay safe, whereas peacocks are known for parading around bright colours to make themselves look better, but if you think about it the term “chameleon peacock” actually makes a lot of sense, a person who blends into their surroundings in order to make themselves look good. This sentiment seems to perfectly describe the homogeneity of the people that live in these perfect towns, they're all the same, they blend in with one another in order to make themselves look good, or perfect.

Another line heard shortly afterwards is the phrase “he cums radiation”, rather vulgar, I grant you, but it's important because it is yet another literalisation of the phrase ‘nuclear family’. It could also be a reference to the general toxicity of this societal norm.

The final line in this section of the song is “the dog bites the postman, as basement eyes dream of a night at the drive-in, with an AR-15”. Which is another use of juxtaposition, intended to cause a kind of whiplash in the listener and reinforce the idea that while in this place there is scenarios that would happen in a hollywood movie esque picture perfect neighbourhood, like the dog biting the postman, there's also horrors that lurk below the surface. (although clearly not TOO far below.)

Now let’s move on to the second part, ‘(Vampire) Culture’.

If you listen to the song, you’ll immediately be able to recognise where 'Greetings from The Marybell Township!' ends and ‘(Vampire) Culture’ begins, due to the insane juxtaposition between the two. Where 'Greetings from The Marybell Township!' is soft and sort of reminiscent of the 1950’s, ‘(Vampire) Culture’ is loud, jarring and grotesque, complemented with much raspier and strained sounding vocals compared to 'Greetings from The Marybell Township!' ’s soft and melodic ones. The tone for this section of the song is immediately set with much more graphic lyrics, the very first line of this section (after the opening scream) is “i dropped my eyeballs in the bonfire, we fucked on a bed of nails” which absolutely sets the scene for how different this section will be to the previous.

This song immediately jumps into using cannibalism as a metaphor, with the first line after the jump start opener being “I caught kuru from your sister, and I'm laughing in jail”. While this line is written to sound like the concept of catching an STD from an act of adultery, Kuru is actually a disease only found in human brain tissue, meaning that you can only contract this disease by eating a human brain, and what's one of the symptoms for this disease? Uncontrollable laughter.

This use of cannibalism as a metaphor is used again immediately after in the line “smell those screaming teenage sweetbreads on that 4th of July grill”, ‘sweetbread’ is the term used to refer to the pancreas and thymus gland of an animal, usually a lamb, but in this particular case it is in reference to the human teenagers that supposedly lived in The Marybell Township, or a least they did before they were dissected, cooked and served at a neighbourhood 4th of July barbeque hosted by the same people that were once referred to as their neighbours.

This line adds an interesting level of patriotism to the song and criticism of how America utilises patriotism and their love for their country as means to justify harming the youth, however a 4th of July neighbourhood barbeque is also commonly associated with white picket fence gated community America, which ties us back to the base criticism of that style of life and how it is seen as the “proper” and “perfect” way to live.

These cannibalistic sentiments are followed up with the line “smile and wave boys, kiss the cook, live laugh and love, please pass the pills.” which brings us back to the repeated use of commonly known sayings being taken directly or modified only slightly to remind the listener of the setting were in, that being a seemingly 1950’s era tight knit neighbourhood.

Phrases like “live laugh [and] love” or “kiss the cook” are both phrases that could easily be seen in a setting like this, especially “kiss the cook”, as this is a phrase commonly associated with aprons worn by grillmasters at neighbourhood barbeques, not unlike the cannibalistic 4th of July barbeque that this particular neighbourhood seems to be hosting.

These phrases being immediately followed up with a sentiment such as “please pass the pills” serves to entirely undermine the pleasantries that, until a moment ago, seemed to be plastered all over the faces of the people living in this fictional town that Wood has created. I think that final phrase brings the listener back to the realisation that not all is right here, quite the opposite in fact, and drags them from their momentary paradise.

Circling back very quickly to the phrase “smile and wave”. I felt the need to point out that this phrase has been used for centuries as a way to say “stop talking and act normal” which once again reinforces that these people are pretending to be something they’re not in order to fit in.

We enter the next verse with the repeated phrase “it's only culture”, after that line is repeated three times we hear “sulfur, smoke and soot”, which could either be a reference to how dirty and disgusting the ‘culture’ is, or it could be a different way of saying that this culture and the people participating are going to hell, as per the common phrase ‘fire and brimstone’ and the fact that sulfur is another way of saying brimstone, and smoke and soot are both byproducts of fire.

The last line of this verse and the first line of the chorus blend into each other, so I’ll speak on them both.

First, the last line of the verse. It goes “you cocked and sucked your lack of empathy, pulled the trigger with your foot to prove you've got-”

Putting aside the clear innuendo, this line refers to the idea of ending one's own life with a long shotgun. According to the media, by the time the gun is cocked and the barrel is in your mouth, you're not able to pull the trigger with your hands due to the length of the barrel. This line instead presents the solution of pulling the trigger with your foot to end your life.

So this person “cocked and sucked” the gun (cocked the gun and put the barrel in their mouth) before pulling the trigger with their foot to prove they’ve got-

And here's where the verse blends into the chorus.

Because the first line only consists of one word.

“Blood”.

The person who was shooting themselves with a shotgun only to prove that they bleed. Which is where the title of this section comes in. “(Vampire) Culture”. This section seeks to portray either the people in this culture or, the more likely option, the culture itself, as metaphorical vampires, who aim to destroy those around them. This knowledge makes the next line “didn't they want your blood, so why apologise for being blue and cold” make a lot more sense. After all, if these culture vampires have drained you of your blood, is it not their fault that you’re now “blue and cold”, as bodies tend to be if they lack blood flow. However, if you look at synonyms for the words “blue” and “cold”, you could also interpret this phrase as meaning “sad and apathetic”.

A sad and apathetic person doesn't seem to be the kind of person this ‘culture’ seeks to enlist however, and so one who is “blue and cold” is shunned as an outsider.

What Wood is getting at is that if this culture is the one who made you sad and apathetic, then you should not apologise to it for being so.

The next verse is short, and like the previous one, also blends into the chorus in the same way, by having the last line of the verse cut off right where the chorus would finish the sentence with the word “blood”. However in this verse, there's an interesting line. “It's only culture and it's more afraid of you than you are of it”, which is a sentiment usually used by adults to attempt to subdue a child's fear of something, usually insects. However it's interesting in the fact that it brings up the idea that this culture that has caused so much damage and harm is actually incredibly fragile, and would, in theory be very afraid of the concept of the individual, because if this ‘culture’ is only being held together by the silent agreeance that everyone will simply pretend, then the idea that there is people who refuse throws the whole idea into jeopardy.

This line is followed up however, by the line that blends it into the chorus. “Go on drink that-”, clearly intended to be finished by the first line of the chorus, making the full line, “go on drink that blood”.

This line is in reference to the phrase “drink the kool-aid” which essentially means to pledge your undying loyalty to something, a concept, a person, a god, etc. and it derives from an infamous mass cult suicide where over 900 people drank poisoned Kool-Aid and subsequently died for the cult. It is not a far cry to believe that this event and this phrase is what the line is referring to, as it's something that Wood has referenced in other songs, so it only makes sense to believe that this is what he means here.

After that chorus we move on to the bridge, which begins by listing 3 pairs of names, all famous or semi famous, and each pair being similar in one right but opposite in another, the line goes as follows; “were you Nabokov to a Sallinger, were you Jung to Freud or Dass to a Leary”, so let's break down these pairs one by one.

First “Nabokov to a Sallinger”, these names belong to Vladimir Nabokov and J.D. Sallinger, both authors who wrote famous books that both surround the theme of innocence, but in very different ways. Nabokov’s book “Lolita” is a story told from the perspective of a grown man about his sexual obsession and attraction to a little girl, and his desire to ruin her innocence, exploring the theme of innocence in a grotesque and frankly horrifying way, which is in stark contrast to Sallinger’s book “The Catcher in the Rye”, which explores the topic of innocence through the main characters desire to preserve their little sisters innocence, and in that desire displays hesitancy at the idea of sex themself. Both books explore the topic of innocence, however while one seeks to preserve it, the other seeks to destroy it, two sides of the same coin.

The next pairing is “Jung to Freud”, meaning Carl Gustav Jung and his mentor Sigmund Freud, who once again are similar in one right, but opposite in another. Jung and Freud both had theories on the nature of the human mind, but where Jungs was all about the concept of spirituality and how that ties into the collective unconscious, Freud's approach was much more focused on the individual unconscious and the concept of sexuality.

The final pairing is “Dass to a Leary”. both psychologists, both at the forefront of the ‘Harvard Psilocybin Project’ (before they both got dismissed from harvard entirely following controversies around the project) Richard Alpert and Timothy Leary were both psychologists and eventually authors who studied the effects of psychedelic drugs on the human mind, and while they were co workers they ended up with pretty conflicting views. Dr. Richard Alpert, who apparently ‘died’ and was ‘reborn’ as spiritual guide Ram Dass, centred his teachings heavily around the concept of living in the moment, (in fact his best selling book, written in 1971 was titled ‘Be Here Now’) and he believed that psychedelic drugs were not needed and that a permanent version of the same effects could be achieved through meditation. Whereas Dr. Timothy Leary advocated heavily for the use of psychedelics, believing that LSD specifically had great potential for therapeutic psychiatric use.

All of these pairings and examples utilise the concept of duality and speak on how every coin has two sides, which can easily be tied back to the idea that the picture perfect suburban life is just one side of the coin. This idea is then reinforced by the next line, “were you mother, daughter, subject and author?”, The use of the word ‘and’ here shows that it's possible to be two sides of the same coin at once, just like how this town, which is perfect on one side of the coin, is still terrible on the other side of the coin. The line is stating that it's possible to be both at once.

The very last line in this section is; “you don't make the rules, you just write them down and do it by the book you throw around”. This line combines a few relatively well known phrases. The first being of course ‘i don’t make the rules’, which can have two distinct meanings. The first is to express a kind of sympathy for someone being punished, and the second is to absolve yourself of the blame for that person being punished, a sort of ‘don't shoot the messenger’ situation.

The ‘rules’ that are likely being referred to here are the societal norms and expectations forced upon people who reside in these towns, the standard for ‘perfection’.

However, following this sentiment up with the phrase “you just write them down” is essentially saying that while it's not the fault of the people in these towns, they didn't create the norms, they still enforce them. They expect everything to be in line and perfect at all times, they follow these ‘rules’ to a T, and they shun and punish anyone who doesn't fit the standard and/or refuses to follow these ‘rules’, which is where the line “do it by the book you throw around” comes in, doing something ‘by the book’ means to follow rules strictly and to the letter, nothing out of line, and to throw the book at someone means to punish them as severely as possible, usually used in the legal sense to mean punishing someone for their crime as severely as the law will allow. So in all, the lyric “you don't make the rules, you just write them down and do it by the book you throw around” ends up meaning ‘you didn't create these norms but you still enforce them by following them to an absolute T and punishing anyone who doesn't.’

With that we enter the third and final section of the song, entitled ‘Love Me, Normally’, a title it shares with another song on the album, but of course this song is partially meant to serve as an overture for the whole album, meaning it shares some similar lyrics with lyrics from other songs on the album, so sharing a title isn't all that surprising.

The first lyric in this section is “do you know the difference between blazing trails and slash and burn?” which is another instance of duality in this song. Trailblazing or being a trailblazer means doing something no one has done before, paving the way for other people to follow in your footsteps, it comes from the literal act of creating a trail in the woods for people to follow, usually by creating notches in trees or setting small fires, hence ‘blazer’, as blaze is another word for a fire. However “slash and burn” is a method of deforestation that involves cutting down and burning a section of forest to create a field. Both examples include using fire to change something, but where one is seen as progress and positive, the other is negative, and seen as a means of destruction. Once again, two sides of the same coin, innovation and destruction.

This is followed up with the line “going against the grain and catching splinters”, which is a line i particularly like because while it is something that literally can happen, if you run your hand along wood in the opposite direction to the grain, you're more likely to get a splinter because you're essentially pushing your hand against the chips of wood, but it also is another metaphor for the dangers of not being the same. Going against the grain in this instance means daring to be different, not going the same way everyone else is going but instead the opposite of that, and in this example splinters are the consequences one would face for being different, especially in a setting like this perfect town, where everyone is the exact same as everyone else.

A little bit later you hear the line “well Lot he had his lot in life, Job his job and i guess you’ll too, and die”.

Lot and Job are both figures found in the Bible, whose names both share spelling with common English words, but are pronounced slightly differently.

Job, from the Book of Job, was a man that was tested by God, made to suffer to test his loyalty, his ‘job’ was to believe unendingly in God and see Him as always correct no matter what.

Lot, from the Book of Genesis, was a man who went through a lot, and the phrase ‘my lot in life’ is a phrase commonly used by people to write off/explain why they don't have it as good as others, they say it's simply their ‘lot in life’.

The end of this line “i guess you’ll too, and die” i believe refers to the fact that everyone will have their own job and their own lot in life, and then everyone in the end will die.

This theory is solidified by the fact that the next line is “The Lord looked down and said ‘hey, you're only mortal’” which is a play off of the phrase ‘you're only human’. Wood himself said that the phrase ‘you're only human’ has always felt weird to him, he says, “cause like, of course I am, aren’t we all? How is that fact supposed to help? I still feel bad. What does being human mean to you?”. He follows this up by saying that the idea of God saying "hey, you're only mortal" offers the same kind of sentiment, but in a “cosmically condescending” sort of way.

The following line reads “giveth and taketh away, till things come out a certain way, leave you wondering when they might go back to normal… leave you wondering why they can't have just been normal”.

This line presents a sort of hopelessness in the realisation that things are constantly changing, nothing is any more ‘normal’ than anything else, there's no such thing as ‘normal’, which is an overarching theme found throughout the album. Once again bringing back the fact that for all intents and purposes this song is an overture for the rest of the album.

To conclude, ‘Suburbia Overture’ is, in my opinion, one of the greatest criticisms of suburban, middle class, gated community, nuclear family life i've ever seen, it highlights the problems in that life and showcases how this kind of lifestyle in its incredibly rigid and restrictive standards is incredibly harmful to the very concept of individuality, because the expectations and unspoken rules set in communities like this and the widespread idea of forced normality seeks to crush any individuality before it even has a chance to blossom.

The use of metaphors and phrases that are well known and are likely to be seen in settings such as this gated community suburban town that Wood has created really paint a subconscious picture of what this community looks like, the use of duality, how every story has another side, and how nothing that is seemingly perfect from the outside is actually perfect on the inside.

Will Wood is an incredible lyricist and the fact that he was able to cram so much symbolism and such a powerful message into a song just over 6 minutes long is genuinely incredible.

Thank you for listening to my/reading my autistic hyper fixated rambling, i hope i didn't melt your brain too badly <3

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revacholianpizzaagenda · 1 year ago

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Apocalyptic squirreling

We're not, like, impaling these quotes like the proverbial shrike or anything, just hoarding them away in a nice stash. A collection of Disco Elysium tidbits about the end of the world compiled by @yekokataa and I, feel free to add!

...starting with the game's earliest teaser trailer.

(28 rather than 27 could be its own odd math, there's some miscounting in the text now and then just like there's the occasional typo, or it could follow the fact that the year of canon events was changed at some point. for that matter, the infamous 22 years to the nuke should be 21, like it originally followed that same 28 and wasn't edited - consistently, the variable it flags is ice.andre_hyper_rc_succ_28)

(this is an example of odd math to me, for the record, as it's 365x27 to the day. It could be it's the EXACT count and also that Elysium doesn't have leap years, but I would've expected a less precise number, personally)

Ours has actual six thousand years of history: it spans from its own version of the early Bronze Age (Perikarnassian period) to the early Middle Ages (Franconigerian period), to the Renaissance (Dolorian period), right up to a decade we call “The Seventies”. It’s a world like ours, one that has evolved culturally and technologically over widely varied periods of time. No Truce With the Furies takes place in the modernity of this world.

(source)

Q: How tight is the connection between the book and the game? Is it a Witcher-like situation? KURVITZ: Things in this world are connected to each other like things in our world are connected to each other – not like things are connected to each other in Star Wars. The book and the game share themes and historical developments. The book is set in the early seventies and the game is set in the early fifties. They are connected the way two stories set in our world would be. The fault-lines developing in the fifties are more apparent in the seventies. The situation has worsened, the political climate has shifted, but there is no Skywalker saga. The main story in Elysium is history.

(source)

yes yes we've all seen the nuke convo but let's put it here for completionism's sake

This connection - saying 22 instead of 27, or 28 as the variable reminds us - could seem strange based on game data alone, but it neatly follows the context of the book, which shows us that the bombing of Revachol is one and the same as the material beginning of the end of the world.

This one is also a fun book throwback, from apocalyptic Kurvitz self-insert to apocalyptic Kurvitz self-insert

(being appreciative of that kind of future just nets you a YEEEAGH)

more personally ominous than globally ominous but ominous nonetheless

("we become vapour" being, of course, the planned title of the eventual Elysium tabletop setting rulebook. sigh.)

This one's intriguing, isn't it? With an eye to Le Retour...

Her echoes of the other dialogue options are similarly ominous, for the record.

And we don't know if Nilsen had visions of his own (the man sounds well-acquainted with his Half Light, on behalf of the war crimes, so it's not... entirely out of the question) but we do know that his pocket calculator lap cat second-bestie very much did and could've been his source.

Also a strong book callback, among other things. Remember kids: object permanence!

Harry, all these quotes like this one sound like they would make sense for the actual guy who goes and blows it all up, not you personal-

...ah yes. Ambrosius looms... yeah buddy it sure is solemn AND historical, I'm afraid:

and of course, in closing:

🥲

...for the remaining 276 pages of Elysium tidbits about the end of the world, of course, over here.

#disco elysium #yekokataa #fayde-weaving #or something

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pernesophe · 2 months ago

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Post Apocalyptic AU Kaji x Reader

Chapter 1: The Witch and the Vampire

(Minors, Ageless and Blank Blogs DNI)

WC: 6490. Ch 2, Ch 3, Ch 4 (links will be added as they are finished)

MDNI. TW for this post: fluff, angst, biting, blood drinking, past character deaths mentioned (Multi-part story, so TW for the whole series are fluff, angst, smut, character death(s)).

Synopsis: Set after an apocalyptic war where reader was born and raised in Furin centuries after the fall of society. Her town is the last patch of green in an otherwise barren world. Nobody knows what caused the war, just that a group of young heroes who were called "Bofurin" fought to save the town. Though records say there were no survivors, it is rumored one Bofurin managed to survive, and is still somehow alive all these years later. (This chapter is more to set the scene for the story).

Song: Playlist Post Kaji's Scent: Based on Brother Night by Apoteker Tepe Reader's Scent: Based on Basilica by Milano

Death is defined in many ways:

1. the action or act of dying or being killed; the end of the life of a person or organism.

2.the state of being dead.

3.the permanent ending of vital processes in a cell or tissue.

In this story a lot of people live, but a lot more die… and yet, with the definition of death provided and the knowledge that it occurs in the following story, it remains to be a fairly unknown concept. So, before beginning this story, I pose to you three questions:

What occurs after death?

Where does one go when they die?

Does existence persist?

“Y/N! Make sure you get more mint and rosemary while you’re out there. We’re gonna need to dry a ton for this winter - I can feel illness coming with the cold,” Kiyoko called out as you stepped through the door. With a cheerful wave and nod, you pulled the rickety wooden door of the hut shut and headed towards the edge of town.

The little town you had grown up in was a little damaged from the war, but what was left of the buildings made for a good home. It also didn’t hurt that the green overgrowth on the buildings and over the former streets were edible. Despite the barren grounds on the edge of the town, your little spot of green housed and fed the sizable community. Many elders credited the witches for coming out of hiding a few centuries prior and warding the town against the threats beyond the verdant foliage, but thanks to Kiyoko you were reminded often that your town has a different group to thank.

As you approached the abandoned building on the edge of town - rectangular with a tree sprouting out of the roof, and a high wall around the edge of the property that still had colorful drawings etched into the stone - you were reminded of the stories of Bofurin. The war had ended long before you were born, so you had no idea what caused the fall of society or why the world was how it was now. What Kiyoko did tell you was that your little community only survived because of Bofurin, a group of young men who defended the town during the height of the war. Unfortunately, none survived through the end.

Despite the lack of survivors, one woman - Kotoha Tachibana - carried on their story and the good they did. That’s why your little village still held a vigil every year on the day the last Bofurin died. A young man with locks split down the middle like the half moon, and dual toned eyes - one slate gray and the other amber. Sakura Haruka was his name, and it was rumored that Kotoha was inconsolable for months after his death. Proven by the fact that she wore black in mourning for the rest of her days. Even though it was recorded that Kotoha celebrated in the vigil as well, she also insisted that there was still one Bofurin remaining until her last breath. His name was never recorded, but it’s rumored that he still lived in the abandoned building on the edge of town.

Surveying the structure riddled with green overgrowth, you thought you caught a glimpse of a shadow pass by one of the dusty windows backlit by the setting sun. But you just chuckled and shook your head before pushing onward. Though a witch, even you had to draw a line at some myths and superstitions.

Ambling through the doorway devoid of any door, making your way up the stairs - stepping over roots as you climbed. Once on the third floor, a quiet cough drew your attention down the hall to your left. Immediately the hair on the back of your neck stood on end. This building had always been eerily silent until now.

“He-hello…?” you called out quietly. Hoping, praying, that no one responded.

A soft melodic voice, timid in nature, pricked Kaji’s ears towards the long forgotten sound of another person. Silently, he moved to the door of the classroom he’d decided to make home centuries ago. Peering out around a thick vine, he saw you. A mousy girl clad in knitted black tights, a red-orange floral patchwork tunic, and a marigold-yellow cardigan. A leather cord looped around your neck with a black stone pendant wrapped in copper wire hung low on your chest. Old, worn leather boots laced up to your ankles with gray wool socks peeking out the tops. A large, aged sack, the same worn brown as your boots, was slung over your shoulder. Notes of resinous camphor, fresh greens and incense clung to your clothes and hair. Just from your clothes and scent Kaji could tell you were a witch, and deduced you were probably coming to collect herbs from Umemiya’s garden.

Releasing a soft sigh, the remaining Bofurin sadly smiled to himself knowing the old leader would have loved that his garden was still helping the town. Stepping back into the classroom, Kaji silently waited for you to pass on. The sun would be setting soon, and no one in town has stayed or come to visit the school at night in a long time. Not since Kotoha’s last visit. Resting the back of his head against the wall of the classroom, he sadly reminisced over his last remaining friend and just how long it had been since he’d spoken to anyone. 100 years? 150…? 200 years seemed too high, he concluded.

“U-um,” a quiet murmur from the doorway tore Kaji from his rumination as his eyes snapped to yours. He hadn’t even heard you approaching - how could he be so careless? Silently he kicked himself before your gentle voice filled the room once more, “He-hello!”

This time you forced a bit more cheer into your tone and offered the silent stranger a smile. The man before you had medium-length blonde hair, cerulean irises, and a severe expression on his face. From the looks of the room, you could tell he’d been living here a while - alone. A bedroll was spread out in the corner with a standing lamp next to it, but other than that it seemed to be what the elders had described as a ‘classroom’.

Even though his face was intimidating, with fists clenched by his sides, his eyes reflected a deep sorrow that tore at your heart. Eyeing his pale skin, incredibly aged clothes that you immediately recognized to be a Furin Uniform, along with the aroma of vaporous amber and rich marigolds you realized that he couldn’t be human. Not anymore at least.

“I’m Y/N,” offering softly as you took a slight step forward to not block the door, “what’s your name?” Inquiring hopefully as you tossed him another reassuring smile. The closer you drew, the more intense your scent became as creamy balsamic and crisp wood reminiscent of pencils enveloped his senses. Suddenly, he was struck with the memory of being in class with his friends just before heading out for patrol, when everyone was still… alive.

Overcome with a sense of melancholy and nostalgia, Kaji moved towards you with widened eyes and fangs poking out over his lips. Taking a slight step back, your heart hammered in your chest as you shook your head lightly and extended your hand to keep him back. In an instant he was sinking his fangs into your neck while gripping your upper arms bruisingly. Hints of rich, peppery smoke drifted from his jacket and tickled your nose while all you could do was squeak and tremble in his powerful hold.

Kaji’s mind filled with the old days in Furin - patrol, Pothos, Kusumi and Enomoto - as the thick, warm liquid flowed over his tongue, soothing his parched throat. Now closer than before, he caught a comforting aroma of pure sweet-wood and velvety leather clinging to your skin. Then, an old yet familiar flavor cascaded over his taste buds that brought tears to his eyes. Peach Chupa Chups. All at once, he released your throat before collapsing - dragging you to the floor with him - his body violently racked with sobs.

Stunned into silence, you sat there for several minutes as he clung to you with his face buried in your neck, shaking. Ever so slowly, you pulled your arms out of his hold and looped them around his neck - one hand gripping the back of his head gently while the other rubbed his shoulder blade. Softly, you hummed an old lullaby that Kiyoko would sing to the children during the dead of winter. Kaji instantly recognized the melody that had carried through the snow covered streets to the old abandoned school many winters in a row now. Gradually he quieted until he was just clinging to you like a life preserve, his face still buried in the crook of your neck where the comforting scent of creamy peach chupa chups flooded his senses.

“Ar-are you okay?” Whispering softly as you slowly released your hold around him. Gingerly, he pulled away from your neck to look you in the eye, his expression wrought with remorse. Parting his lips to respond, but a notch swiftly formed in his brow as nothing but squeaky air came out. Blinking rapidly at his perturbed expression that slipped into one of defeat, then you tilted your head and swept your hair away from your neck.

“Here,” urging softly as you leaned closer to him, but Kaji just stared back in disbelief. “You’re parched and can’t speak…” clarifying your reasoning as you leaned even closer, but he just shook his head lightly instead. “It’s okay - I’m a witch - I know a blood replenishing spell,” assuring him as you brought your neck inches away from his face.

Kaji looked torn as his cerulean irises flicked from the blood still staining your neck, to your trusting gaze, and then back again. At this distance, your sweet-wood incense and crisply herbaceous essence was inescapable. Swallowing thickly, Kaji gently cupped your cheek so you could rest your head in his palm as he wrapped his other arm around your waist and pulled you into his lap. Drawing his mouth to the crook of your neck as he parted his lips, then he sank his teeth into your sensitive flesh before latching on once more.

The second your blood touched his tongue, Kaji’s grip on you tightened as he groaned against your neck greedily. Flavors he hasn’t tasted in God knows how long spilled over his taste buds. Fresh rosemary and sharp thyme clung to the red liquid first, quickly followed by delicate dairy like he’d find in sweet pastries from the Cactus Bakery. Then smoked, earthy cinnamon flooded his mouth the same as the liquor he’d drank with his friends at the start of the war. Finally, that old addicting flavor of Peach Chupa Chups swirled across his wet muscle as tears pricked his eyes. Kaji could feel his cheeks warming from your blood as he clung tighter to your smaller form and grunted deliriously into your neck.

At first you felt completely okay, but then as Kaji swallowed more of your blood the room began to spin. Your head felt heavy as you leaned fully into the palm of his hand. Heat pricked at you and sweat dewed across your skin as nausea pulled uncomfortably in the pit of your stomach. The edges of your vision grew dark and fuzzy before you realized he wasn’t stopping.

“Hm, um-” your slurred speech finally broke him out of his trance as he felt the light tapping of your hand against his forearm. Immediately he detached from your throat and leaned back to see your incredibly pale face and half lidded eyes, a thin sheen of sweat covered your forehead. Your labored breathing caused your chest to rise and fall shallowly while a slight shivering overtook your body.

“N-no!” Kaji emitted a terrified gasp, while repositioning your shivering form so you were cradled in his lap as your head lolled against his chest. “Hey,” murmuring desperately as he began tapping your cheek lightly with his fingertips, “don’t pass out. Please don’t pass out,” he pleaded softly as your eyelids fluttered shut and then gradually cracked open again.

“Th-the spell! Hey, you need to do the spell,” his voice grew louder with urgency as he shook you gently. The sound of your weak heartbeat thundered in his ears tauntingly while primal fear stabbed through his own.

Blinking slowly, you nodded and reached up to grab the stone pendant around your neck. To Kaji’s relief, you brought it to your lips and whispered a foreign word he had never heard before, and then the color started returning to your face as the bite wound on your neck slowly closed.

Humming softly, you tried to sit up but your face scrunched from still feeling light headed. Kaji gingerly helped you sit up, though he bore most of your weight on his chest, and looped an arm around your back to keep you upright. Ever so gently he cupped your cheek and tilted your head so he could look at your face clearly.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” He asked quietly, cerulean irises swimming in guilt and remorse.

“Uh, mhm,” intoning just loud enough for his perceptive ears to catch it. Blinking slowly, vision slowly focused on his face as you tossed him a weak smile. “I’m okay… Wh-who are you by the way?” You inquired again, eyes flicking to the worn Furin button on the collar of his uniform. A pregnant pause passed as he seemed to be debating whether he should answer you or not.

“Kaji.” He finally responded. Instantly, your eyebrows shot up as you not so subtly waited for the rest of his name. Instead he just stared at you, stubbornly silent.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you Kaji,” offering kindly and sitting up a bit more as the light headedness subsided. Despite bearing your own weight, he kept his arm securely around your back as he continued staring at you apprehensively. Tilting your head in question and peering at him, then you chirped out a cheery, “are you feeling better?”

“You taste like peach Chupa Chups,” he blurted out immediately as a notch formed in his brow at his own admission. Then his expression turned accusatory before he asked, “did you do that on purpose? Can witches do that?”

“Uh-um,” chuckling nervously as a crease formed in your brow as well. Slowly you shook your head as the mounting confusion showed clearly on your face. “N-no, we can’t… um, what are Peach Chupa Chups?” Inquiring with a curious titter as Kaji just blinked at you, completely perplexed. Silence filled the room for several tense moments - him regarding you suspiciously and you staring back obliviously - before his cracked voice broke it.

“They’re these… suckers,” his fingers twitched in your tunic at the word, but when you just looked confused he corrected himself. “Candies that I used to eat… all of the time,” he spoke slowly as tears collected along his lash line. Intaking a hissing breath, he then looked to the floor - trying to blink away his tears.

“Oh… I’m so sorry,” whispering softly as you searched for the proper words. Honestly, you couldn’t relate to having something all of the time like that, or what it would feel like to lose it. But it was evident that Kaji was deeply affected, so you gently placed your hand on his shoulder and squeezed comfortingly.

“Is there anything I can do?” You asked tentatively, and Kaji just looked at you with a mirthless twitch of his lips.

“Unless you can summon a millenia-old candy, then no, I don’t think so,” he said with a defeated sigh. Then he added with genuine gratitude reflecting in his eyes, “thank you though.”

“No problem,” whispering as you stared at his melancholic expression. Desperately you wanted to ask him if he was the last Bofurin, about the war, and everyone who fought to save your little town. But the look on his face told you it was better to leave it be.

Wordlessly the two of you sat like that in the darkening classroom for several minutes. You studied the fabled individual curled around you, and Kaji subtly inhaled your ambery oud-musk that enveloped him - knowing that you would be going soon. As dusk set upon the world outside, that moment finally arrived as you twitched in his arms and moved to speak. Kaji sadly met your gaze and awaited your goodbye.

“I-I have to go…” murmuring softly, your own heart breaking from his sorrowful nod. “But, um, would it be okay if I came back tomorrow?” Querying cautiously as you clasped your hands in your lap, twirling your thumbs nervously. Instantly, his whole demeanor brightened with surprise as he began bobbing his head without any hesitation.

Rising to your feet, a relieved smile tugged at the corners of your mouth as you uttered a quiet goodbye and made your way to the doorway. Kaji just stared at you, a little dumbfounded, but with longing filled eyes. At the door, you turned back with a reassuring look as you promised you would be back first thing tomorrow evening. Silently, he nodded as you disappeared through the doorway, and then he listened to your quiet footsteps until you exited the building.

The walk home was a little brisk with the coming autumn, but not cold enough to make you shiver. As you stepped over twisted roots and ducked under thick vines draped between abandoned buildings, you pondered what you could do for the lonely soul in that classroom. So deep in your rumination that when you walked through the wooden door of the hut you didn’t even hear Kiyoko speaking.

“Y/N? Did you get more mint and rosemary?” She asked again, regarding you with a worried expression from where she stood in front of the wood stove. Blinking slowly as you processed her words, and then you realized you hadn’t gone to the garden at all.

Guiltily admitting that you didn’t get them or any herbs while hanging your head, but Kiyoko didn’t chide you and simply asked what happened. She brewed a calming tea and sat on the floor with you at the short wooden table that dated back to before the war. There, over a cup of lilac-chamomile tea, you told her about your encounter with Kaji as you begged her not to tell anyone else throughout the entire tale.

At first she was too stunned to respond, but eventually agreed and urged you to tell her everything. So you told her as much as you could, even though you and Kaji hadn’t shared many words. Once finished, you made sure to convey to her that he wasn’t dangerous and seemed remorseful to have bitten you. Luckily, Kiyoko believed you so, taking a chance, you asked if she knew anything about “blood preserves”. A perplexed look crossed her face until you clarified that you meant “candies” - using the word Kaji mentioned before - hoping she’d recognize it.

Nodding slowly, she told you she might and went to find her grimoire. The room was quiet except for the flipping of pages, pausing at points to read more thoroughly, and then flipping once more. Several minutes passed like this until she stopped on a page with a tap of her finger and a triumphant aha! Returning to the table, she handed you the page with a prideful smile.

Gratefully, you thanked her and then asked if she knew of any elders who had pictures or writings from before the war. Kiyoko cocked her head to the side and pursed her lips before directing you to ask Mr. Sato, since he inherited everything from his ancestors who owned a popular store in Furin before the war. Again, you thanked her genuinely and promised that you would get the herbs tomorrow evening. You also told her that you wouldn’t be returning until the morning after and to not worry or send anyone looking for you. Apprehensive, she asked if you were sure, but you just smiled and nodded confidently in response.

After that, the conversation turned to town affairs. Mostly about the uptick in the birth rate and overall population, which was a major boon for the town, but also the fact that resources weren’t keeping up with growth. Kiyoko mentioned that the elders were becoming worried about what that would mean for future generations. Unfortunately you didn’t have any words to quell her stress, so you just gently took her hand and squeezed it. The two of you let the quiet consume the small hut before turning in for the night.

First thing the next morning you went straight to Mr. Sato and asked about anything he had from before the war. Surprised, but giddy to show anyone his memorabilia, he dragged you to the lower level of the old building he lived in to show you boxes upon boxes of magazines. After about 30 minutes of his excited babbling, he finally let you loose on the boxes and told you to let him know if you needed any help. It took you another 45 minutes of gingerly flipping through the aged pages until you came upon a printed word that you recognized.

“Candies” was printed small in the bottom right hand corner of the page. In the center was a blown up picture of an oval, green candy on a stick. Printed at the top of the page, above the picture, were a sequence of letters that if you sounded out were similar to the word Kaji said. “Suckers.”

The design seemed simple enough for you to replicate, so after that you sought out a few of the town’s children and asked them to help you find sticks. More importantly, ones that you could put food on, so not poisonous or toxic. Excited by the mystery of the task, they all pitched and then happily whittled their findings into long, smooth, uniform sticks.

With all the materials gathered, you prepared to extract the final ingredient. Blood. More specifically, yours. Kiyoko was kind enough to help you collect enough to make about 30 suckers, and once they were set in their molds you not so patiently waited for them to dry. Multiple times Kiyoko shooed you out of the kitchen, and finally the hut altogether, and told you not to come back until the sun had set. As you ambled away from the hut she chided you about being so antsy that you were stressing her out.

So to pass the time and repay the kid’s hard work, you played a few games of hide and seek as well as sharks and minnows with them. As the sun began to dip behind rubbled buildings, casting long shadows from the vines over the streets, you promised to make them some treats soon while returning to the hut. Even though it was growing late in the year, you suspected there may be some late yields of berries that you could make suckers from as well.

Kiyoko met you at the door of the hut with the suckers already wrapped up and your overnight bag in her hand. With a laugh she told you that she couldn’t let your antsiness back into the hut, lest she’d catch your stress for the rest of the night. Gratefully, you thanked her with a chuckle of your own and took both items before she shooed you off with a bright smile.

Frigid weather grew ever nearer as you approached the abandoned school. A harsh wind tore through your cardigan despite wrapping it tightly around yourself to brace against the swiftly approaching autumn. Though the mild season seemed to turn to winter quicker and quicker with each passing year. Soon you would have to break out the large Furin jacket that had been passed down to you from Kiyoko - she said it belonged to one of the Kings. Hiragi Toma.

Making your way through the doorway and up the gnarled, rooted stairs, you wondered how Kaji would feel about the town putting so many items from Bofurin to use. Halting at the top on the third floor, once again the building was eerily silent but this time you knew where to search for the fabled resident.

Except when you stepped into the doorway of the classroom, you found it to be devoid of any sign of Kaji. The bedroll now gone, the small duffel bag strewn to the side replaced with papers shifting from a wayward breeze. Your heart wrenched as your eyes confirmed that all signs of Kaji had been swept away, though you weren’t sure why but you felt a lump forming in your throat and tears collecting along your lash line over someone you’d just met.

Hanging your head with a sorrowful sigh as you stepped backwards out of the classroom, but then a loud gasp escaped you as your back hit something incredibly hard and unmoving. Swiftly turning on your heel with raised fists to face the offending obstruction, but you were instead met with a pair of familiar cerulean irises.

“Kaji!” Crying out immediately as a wide smile spread across your face, the sound of your hammering heart echoed in his ears. He stared back in shock, mostly due to your expression that was mixed with excitement and… relief. “I thought you had left. Where’d all of your stuff go?” You asked with a worried tilt of your head, and again Kaji just blinked at your genuine concern.

“Uh,” his voice sounded a little hoarse before he cleared it with a cough behind his fist. “Winter’s coming, and the direction of the sun starts changing day by day, so I have to move a lot throughout autumn and spring to be safe.” He explained, and your gaze followed his gesture to one classroom over before coming back to his still regarding you with a mix of solace and disbelief.

Nodding slowly as you took in all of the windows in the hallway, and the large ones in the classroom. For a moment you wondered why he wouldn’t just cover them, but as your gaze returned to his worn Furin jacket it dawned on you that it was probably familiar to him this way. Awkwardly, Kaji averted his gaze to the end of the hall with another cough behind his fist, which reminded you of the suckers. Quickly patting the pockets of your cardigan and tunic, drawing Kaji’s attention back to you with interest, and then you suddenly produced the wrapped bundle with a triumphant aha! Beaming brightly as you thrusted the wrapped package into his hands, but Kaji just stared at them for a moment before looking at you, completely perplexed.

“Open it!” You urged him with a laugh. Blinking slowly, then turned his attention back to the cloth in his hands as he slowly unwrapped it to reveal a slew of blood red candies on beige, whittled sticks.

Suckers.

All he could do was stare at them for a long, long moment. Then, ardently, he took one of the sticks between his thumb and index finger before bringing the candy to his lips and stuck it between his teeth. Iron was the first thing he tasted, then something freshly herbaceous, and finally creamy Peach Chupa Chup flooded his mouth.

You observed the sucker pass his lips closely as his eyes fell shut, and then his brow creased in recognition before smoothing out completely with an expression of unbridled satisfaction. When his eyes cracked open to meet your gaze again, they were misty and filled with deep, nostalgic longing. Tentatively, you threw him a tiny smile - hoping that you did something right by him, instead of making him sadder. Instantly, he stifled a sob - trying to swallow it down - as he was reminded of all the times the townspeople offered him food and sweets with a grateful smile.

“Oh God, I’m so sorry!” Exclaiming as you shifted your weight from foot to foot, having no idea how to comfort him. His face crumpled as he just shook his head at you and choked on his words. After several seconds of the hall being filled with echoing chokes and sniffles, you swallowed thickly and stepped forward.

Kaji stilled as he felt your arms wrap around his torso and squeeze him tightly. Words were never something that came easily to you in these situations, but you had some experience with the town’s children. Whenever they would cry and couldn’t speak about it, you’d just hug them as tight as you could until they were able to speak again. So that’s what you did - hugged Kaji with all of your strength while rubbing his back comfortingly while softly humming the same tune from the day before. With each intake of breath, your lungs were filled with his essence of wood smoke, copal incense, and bitter marigolds.

Eventually the trembling from his sobs subsided and he was stuck standing in your embrace, utterly stunned. Peering down, he had to stifle a laugh at your scrunched face pressed against his chest to counter the melodic lullaby you were humming into his jacket; accentuated by you clinging onto him with all your might. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around you as well, the lullaby stopping short in your throat, as he buried his nose into the top of your head while crushing you into his chest.

“Thank you for the suckers,” susurrating into your hair as his eyelids fell shut. Several minutes passed of you remaining perfectly still while Kaji held you close, breath puffing into your hair rhythmically.

To him you smelled like any other witch that has wandered through: cedar soaked in cypriol oil, clouded in labdanum incense - reminiscent of the old candlelit rituals that would be held by the stone walls of the school. But underneath he kept catching whiffs of creamy, sweet peaches - the aroma that drew him to you and filled his mind with dreams of the old days. The aroma that kept weaving visions of you into those same dreams with a sense of comforting nostalgia he didn’t quite understand.

Eventually, you felt your legs going to sleep from standing for so long, so you peered up at him cautiously. Kaji jumped slightly as your hair shifted against his nose, and when he cracked his eyes he was met with yours just inches away. From here he could feel the warmth of your breath fanning against his neck and jaw. Swallowing thickly, the sucker clinked against his teeth, as he gradually released you though he didn’t step away - your body heat still radiated through the gray sweatshirt to his skin underneath.

“Um,” murmuring as you shifted your weight awkwardly under his unblinking stare. “I hope it’s okay - I brought an overnight bag,” declaring as you held up the burlap sack, “to stay the night…” you quietly trailed off as Kaji’s eyes widened to an impossible degree.

Before you could tell him that it was okay if not, or that you could even sleep in a different classroom, he nodded his head stiffly. Grinning wide, you started to ask him where you should put your stuff, but he grabbed your hand tightly and led you to the classroom he gestured at earlier. To your surprise, he didn’t let go until you were settled across from him on his bedroll, and when he finally did his eyes stayed glued to your hand for a moment before meeting your sympathetic gaze. Everything about him - from his eyes, to his expression and demeanor, to the clothes he wore and the place he resided - screamed loneliness.

“Did you bring anything to sleep on?” He finally spoke, gaze drifting to your bag that couldn’t possibly hold a bedroll, then back to your bright red face.

“Well, um, kind of…” you laughed out sheepishly. “But I don’t really sleep on a bedroll at home - me and Kiyoko sleep on some old rugs that have lasted. So I just brought one that would fit,” explaining quickly as you opened the sac to reveal a printed mat that would maybe fit about half of your body. Kaji just stared at it incredulously for a moment before shooting you a deadpan look.

“You can take my spot,” he stated with a nod to the bedding the two of you were currently sitting on. Your mouth fell open as a hot, prickly sensation crawled over your body.

“Absolutely not! I can’t take your bed.” Arguing with a vehement shake of your head, before you continued seriously, “I sleep on the floor all the time anyway, so I’m used to it, and I just showed up without any real invitation. It would be rude of me to take it,” finishing your point with a decisive nod of your head. The corner of Kaji’s mouth twitched at your change in tone and the determined notch in your brow.

“Then we’ll share it,” Kaji conceded, despite the subtle twitch of his lips, his expression had returned to deadpan at this point. Before you could argue any further, he smoothly added, “you did show up without any real invitation. It would be rude of you not to take the sleeping arrangements offered.”

All protests died on your tongue as you slowly closed your mouth and relented with a small nod. Though there was barely any change in his expression, you did catch a triumphant gleam in his cerulean eyes and your heart swelled at the tiny change in his affect. The two of you sat there quietly as the dusk turned dark while the classroom became shadowy. Eventually it was difficult to see Kaji at all, and when you heard a bang from the roof you jumped with a high pitched squeak.

Click, click, click. Suddenly the room was bathed in soft yellow light from a lamp in the corner where Kaji now stood. Breathing a sigh of relief, you watched as he settled on the bedding once more - your expression worried and questioning.

“Animals,” he explained after a moment - finally catching on to your silent inquiry. Instantly your eyes lit up with intrigue. It’s been years since any animals other than humans have been recorded in town. Honestly, it was assumed most died out centuries ago. “I guess you all don’t really get the chance to see them - most turned nocturnal a few hundred years after the war. Just generally safer for them I guess,” he elaborated, satiating your intrigue.

“How big?” Leaning forward, bringing notes of sweet herbs and warm incense to his nose, as your eyes widened with excitement. Kaji smiled softly at you, relishing in the genuine human connection he’s missed for… God knows how long at this point. Then, he went on to tell you that it was mostly small animals: birds, rodents, some insects that have survived, and on occasion larger animals (mostly in the winter): deer, coyotes, the occasional bear. The latter, he explained that he’d scare them away from the paths that lead to town, but still let them eat what they needed.

You listened intently, eyebrows shooting up at the mention of bears, and your entire face lit up when he mentioned seeing a butterfly only a few summers back. Seeing Kaji being so open, you took the opportunity to ask about the old town, and he was gracious enough to share.

He told you about how the town was kind of dangerous back in the day, because of turf wars between people, and how that led to the creation of Bofurin. You observed his face light up and eyes become distant as he regaled the times he had with his friends, even naming and telling you about some of them. Most you already knew from the records - Umemiya, Hiragi, Enomoto, Kusumi - but it was different hearing about them first hand. When he told you about how the townspeople used to depend on them, and celebrated them for protecting the town by giving them treats, you started to understand his reaction from before.

Eventually, as Kaji’s stories petered out, he finally asked what he’s been most worried about. How is the town doing now?

Throwing him a kind smile, you told him everything you could. First you told him about the elders, most of whom were designated to keep and care for the items passed down from Bofurin members. Though he looked happy about it, you still didn’t mention the piece you inherited - Hiragi Toma’s Furin jacket. Next, you mentioned how things were scarce sometimes, but for the most part you all managed, and how the population has actually been growing as of late. He seemed overjoyed by that fact, so you were careful when sharing some of Kiyoko’s fears about resources not keeping up with the new growth.

Kaji looked perturbed over this and asked why you all couldn’t make more - assuming that the greenery was due to the witches’ magic. With a sad shrug you explained that magic couldn’t fix everything, and that the greenery was a bit of its own miracle that the witches couldn’t really take credit for. At your admission Kaji seemed confused, but also maybe a little happy that it wasn’t the witches’ doing. Though you didn’t ask him outright, after a quiet moment he shared that the original garden was Umemiya’s that was started at least half a century ago at this point. He didn’t know how or why it took over the town, but he was glad that it did because he knew Umemiya would be really happy about it still helping the town.

“That makes me really happy too,” murmuring earnestly, which earned you a surprised glance from Kaji. “I’m really grateful to you, and the rest of Bofurin. None of us would be here if you all hadn’t fought for us,” you said genuinely with a firm nod. Kaji simpered despite his gruff demeanor before nodding as well, then the bright white moon caught his eye through the window. He hadn’t noticed how high it was in the sky until now.

“Did you sleep at all before coming here?” He asked as his gaze cut sharply to yours. Again, you sheepishly laughed and shook your head. Kaji rolled his eyes at you before moving to pull back the blanket.

“It’s already 3am - go to sleep,” he instructed, his tone slightly admonishing but lacked any true malice. Tittering softly, you crawled up the bedroll and slipped under the blanket. Kaji laid the blanket over you, and then began to settle on top of the bedding next to you.

“What are you doing?” Demanding as you sat up, untucking the blanket completely, Kaji just blinked at you before gesturing at the bed.

“Going to sleep. Like you should be doing,” he admonished you, but his cerulean irises couldn’t hide the amusement from the look of disbelief plastered on your face.

“You said we would share,” arguing petulantly which did elicit a chuckle from Kaji - he didn’t realize you had so much personality. “This isn’t sharing.” Defending your point as you tugged gently on the blanket that was over you and under Kaji for emphasis.

“Do witches not care about their virtue in this century?” Kaji posed with an arched brow. To his credit, he was able to maintain a cool facade as your face turned three shades redder while your mouth opened and closed like a guppy.

“That’s not it!” You snapped, crossing your arms over your chest defensively. Kaji stifled a titter at your reaction - it reminded him of Kotoha or Tsubaki. Then your shoulders drooped slightly as you threw him an earnest look before tentatively adding, “it’s just getting close to winter… I thought you’d be cold.”

Kaji was taken aback by your genuine nature, and was unable to hide the surprise on his face - brows raised, wide eyes, lips slightly parted from speechlessness. Quietly he relented with a curt nod as he climbed under the blanket, immediately you tucked yourself into his side, wrapping your arms around him and burying your face into his chest. Kaji laid there for a moment before hesitantly wrapping his arms around you as well, pulling you into his embrace.

Notes of piney-amber incense and earth-smoked musk enveloped your dreams as sleep swiftly claimed you. Kaji laid there silently as your breathing slowed within a few minutes, hot breath puffing into his sweatshirt and warming his chest. That crisp, pencil-like wood scent, accompanied by sweet cinnamon clung to you and filled the space with your soft exhalations. An indescribable amount of time had passed since the last time he had felt such warmth, and even though it had been comfortingly shared between friends, it had also been short lived. But this was different - it felt inexhaustible and safe.

When Kaji finally drifted off to sleep, his dreams were set in old Furin - patrolling with his friends, but oddly enough he kept catching glimpses of you. Never directly, just a swish of your tunic as you turned a corner, or a flick of your hair through the window of Pothos but when he looked you were gone. Near the end he was certain you were there, somewhere in town, as he desperately trailed after your scent through the streets and down alleyways. He woke before he could find you in his dreams, but his body sagged with relief the moment he found you still sleeping soundly in his arms.

Ch 2, Ch 3, Ch 4 (links will be added as they are finished)

Master List (I have no rights to these characters, the works they come from, or the art/screenshots/manga panels used in this post. Screenshots taken from pinterest or google, so if you know the creator please lmk! Divider is from @sweetmelodygraphics )

Tag List: None so far, but lmk if you would like to be added for this series or my other Wind Breaker Works!

#wind breaker x reader #windbreaker x reader #pernesophe #sp's headspace #fluff #kaji x reader #kaji ren x reader #kaji ren x you #vampire kaji x reader #witch reader #post apocalyptic au

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writers-potion · 10 months ago

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It is a well-known fact that there are seven levels in Hell. Similarly, apocalyptic accounts of heaven range from one heaven to ten, but most agree on seven.

As fantasy writers, this is great news. Let's dive.

First Heaven

The physical world. It is ruled by Gabriel, and is home to all the angels connected with the natural phenomena of the universe.

In ancient Mesopotamian religion, the first dome of heaven was made of jasper and was the home of the stars.

Second Heaven

Ruled by Raphael.

It is the home of sinner who are waiting for Judgement Day.

Some of the fallen angels are held her as well. Kinda like the field of asphodel, which make this one sound more like pre-hell, but whatever.

Mesopotamians believed the middle domes (2nd-6th) were made of saggilmut stone and home of lgigi, mythological beings living in heaven.

Third Heaven

Ruled by Baradiel. The southern half of this heaven contains the Garden of Eden and the Tree of Life. 300 angels of light stands sentry.

The Northern half of the third heaven contains hell. Not surprisingly, some fallen angels are held here.

Like the seven layers of Hell, the seven domes of Heaven seem to be a more extended version of typical one-story Heaven and therefore houses more creatures beyond angels.

Fourth Heaven

Ruled by Michael. It contains the Holy Temple and the Altar of God.

Mesopotamians equated the seven domes of Heaven surrounding the flat earth with celestial bodies.

The first dome would be Mercury, the second Venus, the third Mars, and so on.

Ordinary mortals wouldn't go go heaven because the heavens were the abode of gods alone.

Fifth Heaven

Ruled by Zadkiel. In ancient Mesopotamia, each visible celestial body was equated with a god.

The planet Venus was believed to be Inanna, the goddess of love, sex an war (would they ever stop being a trio?).

The sun was her brother Utu, the god of justice and the moon was their father Nanna.

Sixth Heaven

Ruled by Zebul at night and Sabath by day. All celestial records are kept here, and choirs of angels endlessly study them.

After a person (a mere mortal) dies, his/her soul would go to Kur which is a dark shadowy underworld located deep below the surface of the earth. Seems like the Mesopotamian gods were hellbent on getting some personal space in the sky …

Seventh Heaven

Archangel Cassiel rules this realm.

The Seraphim, Cherumbim and Thrones live here.

In ancient Mesopotamia (where the seven-heaven theory originated), the last and highest dome of the heavens was made of luludanitu stone and was personified as An, the god of he sky.

If you like my blog, buy me a coffee☕ and find me on instagram! 📸

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zedecksiew · 7 months ago

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TO PUT AWAY A SWORD

David Blandy + Daniel Locke's post-apocalyptic hopepunk TTRPG ECO MOFOS is back from the printers. Meaning it will soon be in our hands.

Am fairly hyped for it, because I wrote an adventure!

To Put Away A Sword is about the woes of building a home on poisoned earth. The terrible powers that hurtled us to the end of the world continue to bear bitter fruit in your garden.

You are villagers living under the shadow of a fallen giant mecha. Its reactors and warheads leak into your groundwater, poison your goats. What will you do about it? What can you do?

Mechanically it is a pointcrawl around your local valley. Not super complex, design-wise; but I was pleased with my gimmick solution for mapping both the adventure's dungeons:

Grab a mecha figure, pose it, place it on the game table; each part of the figure corresponds to a location in the dungeon key. Solves for stuff like relative orientation.

Easy!

To Put Away A Sword is me making a mecha adventure.

Disclaimer: I am not a mecha nerd. I am unfamiliar with most of the genre. Anything I know about Gundam I've absorbed by osmosis.

I was mainly into giant robots in childhood. Receiving a Macross figure for my birthday. Pouring over the manual for The Crescent Hawks' Revenge, which my brother left behind:

While I was not much a fan of mecha, I was very much a fan of Evangelion. I spent my middle teens obsessed with it. The biomechanical, pseudo-mystical stuff; the teen angst. I wanted to be Shinji. I thought trauma was so cool.

So cringe. Anyway:

One of the inspirations for To Put Away A Sword is the survivors-rebuilding-a-town-and-planting-rice sequence in Thrice Upon A Time; probably my favourite part of the whole franchise, now.

The joy and difficulties of trying to build your paradise in the weird ruins of the old world:

Yeah, the adventure has a lot of Evangelion in it. There's a Nerv HQ analogue to explore. There's a content warning for child soldiers.

The other inspiration for To Put Away A Sword is this piece of box art, an accessory set for Macross's iconic Stonewell Bellcom VF-1 Variable Fighter:

I don't know what this kind of arrange-your-missiles-in-front-of-your-fighter-jet photo is technically called. Hardware porn parade?

You see it often enough. Here's a real-life photo of the Lockheed Martin F35 Joint Strike Fighter:

Fairly or not, in my head I associate mecha with seeing copies of Jane's Defence in airport magazine racks. The genre feels like such a natural way to riff on the hyper-charged corpo-military-industrial complex.

After the brush war ends, and the natural resources extracted, and the ethnic cleansing concluded, and the profits announced, who gets to clean up after a Raytheon missile?

In To Put Away A Sword---you do.

Ultimately, as always, I am writing and designing from my lived experiences.

See that? The gas flare from the Hengyuan Refining Company? It is about 200 metres from my living room.

That gas flare surfaces constantly in the stuff I make. As I write this post I am breathing its acrid chemical smell. My nose itches. I was asthmatic as a child; I seriously worry about cancer, nowadays.

At night it lights up the sky like Barad-dur.

The plant obviously and continuously flaunts regulations. We've tried lodging complaints: with its corporate management; with the Department of Environment. Nothing has worked so far.

"A home on poisoned earth" is a visceral fact of my life.

To Put Away A Sword is wish-fulfilment, I guess? In the world of the adventure, at least, the forces that are poisoning your home are post-peak oil.

It is nice to imagine a reality where a kind of survival and flourishing is still possible. My partner Sharon and I talk a lot about imagining hope.

Last month she bought this small mecha-looking thing. A wireless camera! She built a little hut for it on our garden wall. It is trained, 24-7, at the gas flare.

Environmental activists we've met say video evidence of emissions is important. We'll see. We imagine it helping.

Anyway. David just sent me this photo of my adventure, in print:

Looking good. I hope folks play it and enjoy it.

Preorder ECO MOFOS and its adventure bundle >>>HERE<<<

#adventures #ttrpgs #eco mofos #writing #fantasies #mecha #real life #gas flares

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kingofbodyrolls · 5 months ago

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End of the World: shower drabble (m) | myg

you take your first real shower in four years (with Yoongi).

→ Pairing: Yoongi x reader (female) → Genres/AUs: post-apocalyptic, dystopian, survival (it’s just undertones from the main story). This one is just pure fluff with some implied smut → Tropes: established relationship → Rating: mature/explicit/R18 (this is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact.) → Word count: 1.2k → Warnings + triggers: mentions of the war, bombings, deaths and such. Unprotected sex (it’s more implied than anything else), kissing, oral (implied), shower sex (implied). → Author’s note(1): this is just a really short drabble for the sweet anon that wanted to read about OC’s first shower [link to the request here] 🥹 the fact that she hasn’t had a proper shower in so long 😭 so here it is! I hope it was okay 💜 Also, this technically takes place in the middle of ‘End of the World: A Flickering Hope’, this is from their first day at Whalien52 💕 → Read on AO3? [link]

[navi]: end of the world // end of the world: a flickering hope // shower drabble // whalien52 // end of the world: epilogue

It’s not that you haven’t washed in four years—just that you haven’t had a proper shower. Does the rain outside count as a shower? Hardly. But that’s been your life: rain showers. Better than nothing, right?

Your hair, tangled and knotted, might need cutting if you can’t brush it all out. Yoongi’s hair has grown so long he could tie it in a pretty ponytail or a man bun.

Meeting Whalien52 has given you and Yoongi many things—one of them being your first real shower in years.

In the past, you could go a few days without a shower, no big deal. If you were home and didn’t have to socialize, showering didn’t matter much. But now, with grime, dirt, and sand clinging to your skin, you long to wash it all away. You want to feel clean and fresh, to rinse off the horrors of war, the bombings, the deaths... The only memories you want to keep are those of Yoongi. Oh, how you wish you could forget the rest, erase it, turn back time. But Yoongi? Him you want to keep forever.

“Are you coming, babe?” Yoongi’s voice from the bathroom interrupts your thoughts.

Oh, right. He’s waiting for you in the shower. Naked.

You can already hear the water running, hitting the tiles. The sound prickles your skin, quickening your heartbeat. You want it so badly—to feel the water on your skin, to soak, to be washed clean. Your mind drifts back to that time in Yoongi’s house when he washed you and took you on his bed afterward.

Your skin heats up, goosebumps rising all over. If you didn’t know better, you’d think you had a fever, but you’re just excited for your first real shower in years. You’ll have to thank Jungkook and Taehyung for building this. You guess you owe the whole crew for many things, one of them being a new home and new friends.

You enter the bathroom, the hot steam enveloping you. It feels humid, but you don’t mind. Your smiling face greets you in the mirror, though it’s already fogged up, making it hard to see your reflection.

In a hurry, you shed your clothing, letting everything fall to the floor. These clothes might not survive a hand wash; you might have to throw them out. But it’s no matter. Jungkook has gifted both you and Yoongi some of his big tees and sweatpants, and that will be fine for now. It’s your first day here, and now you can finally have the shower of your life.

Wrapping your fingers around the shower curtain, you drag it to the side, revealing your naked boyfriend. A soft smile graces your face as your mind races with illicit thoughts.

“Is it hot?” you ask, extending your hand into the spray. The water hits you, feeling both prickly and comforting. It’s not too hot; it’s perfect.

“Come in and find out,” he smirks, sticking his tongue out teasingly.

You step into the tiny shower space, barely big enough for two. Pressed against your boyfriend, you struggle to breathe as the water soaks your hair, trickling down your face and naked body. It feels foreign but good. You take deep breaths, letting the moment envelop you; the warm water wraps around your body, cleansing it of grime and blood. Yoongi pulls you into his embrace, his strong chest and heartbeat grounding and calming you as always. The water dances on your skin, covering every inch of you and Yoongi, gently cleansing. It feels magical and surreal.

Yoongi moves his head to your neck, teasing your skin with his mouth. His tongue licks and he grunts into your neck, “This is amazing. I missed showering with you.” You hum in satisfaction, because yeah, you’ve missed this too.

Your hands move over his body, scrubbing him clean of dirt without shampoo. You feel something poke your stomach and look down, “You’re hard?”

He giggles, “Well, can you really blame me?”

You giggle, biting your lip teasingly as one of your hands finds his erect cock and you begin to stroke him. The shower becomes stuffier, more humid with your panting and moans growing higher and higher. You always want him and can never get enough.

When you’ve given his dick enough attention with both your hand and mouth, he turns you around and fucks you against the cold tile of the bathroom wall. It feels nice with the warm water still caressing your skin, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room. It becomes hard to breathe. Both of your breaths are short, and you climax together in a panting mess, while the shower washes away the traces of your essences.

“Showering feels so nice. Especially with you,” you giggle, kissing him.

He hums, and you feel it against your breasts. It feels like love, whispering that everything will be okay.

Yoongi picks up a shampoo bottle, squirting some liquid into his hands, and then begins to wash you completely clean, even washing your hair like he did all those years ago. You relish the feeling of being cared for, momentarily forgetting what’s happening outside these walls, outside this hideout. You savor the sensation of being taken care of, because you’ve taken care of so many. It’s okay to have someone else care for you. It’s okay.

Yoongi’s gentle hands coax out the grime and tangles, each touch a soothing balm to your weary soul. The water cascades over you, washing away layers of dirt and despair, leaving you feeling reborn. His fingers work through the knots in your hair, a tender reminder of the care you had forgotten you needed.

The steam wraps around you both, creating a cocoon of warmth and intimacy. You lean into Yoongi’s touch, letting out a contented sigh as his hands glide over your skin, massaging away the tension of years spent surviving. You moan softly, feeling a new wetness pool between your legs, and Yoongi chuckles, a deep, resonant sound that vibrates through you. When it’s your turn to wash him, he shivers under your touch, releasing needy sounds that make you laugh, because you have the same effect on him. The water, the touch, the shared intimacy—it’s a ritual of cleansing, a renewal of hope.

After the shower, you wrap yourselves in soft towels, feeling lighter, cleaner, more human. You’re spent too much hot water, but it was much needed. You slip into the clothes Jungkook provided, the fabric soft and comforting against your freshly washed skin. Brushing your teeth with new brushes feels like a luxury, a small act of normalcy in a world turned upside down. You’d been using your long ones for too long. It’s nice. Everything’s nice. You’re hopeful. Hopeful for the future. Everything is going to be alright.

For the first time in what feels like forever, you go to bed with freshly washed hair, freshly washed skin. Next to your boyfriend. You get to sleep in a proper bed. A real bed. And it feels like a good mattress too. You feel like you’ve won the lottery. Lying down in the bed, with Yoongi beside you, feels like a dream. The mattress cradles you in its softness, and you marvel at the simple pleasure of clean sheets and a real bed. You close your eyes, letting the events of the day settle into your bones, a quiet certainty blooming in your chest. This is your first day at Whalien52, but you already know that every day that follows will be filled with hope and possibility. Everything might just turn out alright for you.

→ Taglist:@idkjustlovingbts@lovelgirl22@gimeow@sweeetas@viankiss @goldietigers294 @this-most-assuredly-counts @futuristicenemychaos @funnygirls-things @ysljoon @livingformintyoongi @as-hs-blog @urmomluvsrose @yasmineixyjay @purpleheartsandarock1 @alextgef @coree730 @wobblewobble822 @coldcoffee2121 @zzoguri

okay fuck you tumblr for not making the tags work! rip, I don't get why it isn't tagging people *cries*

→ Author’s note(2): I’m really sorry if this is shit… I’m really struggling with my writing, but when I read anon’s request I got a burst of inspiration and decided to write it down. I’m sorry if it sucks.

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