#I've already started searching for a new workplace

[veraverorum]

Thanks to bad news at work I was too sad to even flirt with the cute girl of the other office

[spdrvyn]

Perhaps a request for Miggy x scientist reader? Reader is a a former Alchemex scientist who used to work with Miguel. They have been working in spider HQ ever since the beginning of spider society. Both of them have been too busy to realize the bottled up feelings and emotions that is about to burst….

breaking beakers

miguel and a reader that's been by his side since day 1. since the treachery of alchemax, you've been loyal to miguel and his cause for protection of the multiverse. read bit by bit how your relationship with miguel develops, even if it's only something as simple as helping him administer rapture.

angst. drug usage (rapture). panic attack. absolutely love this request! i've never written a story where the reader was already a part of miguel's past so this is new and exciting for me. thank you, anon! i put my own twist, i hope you still enjoy reading ♡

dividers by @cafekitsune

breaking breakers

When you got paired up with your workplace's assigned asshole, you were more than concerned for your career than ever. 

Miguel wasn't easy from the start. Arguments were one after the other, followed by complete silence in the lab due to the inability of either of you to take accountability. You had never really heard him talk or engage in conversation properly unless it was to scold or correct you for making, according to him, a quintillion mistakes. 

It stretched you thin, you were close to asking the higher-ups to give you another partner, but you knew that they would ignore your protests so you put up with it. Besides, talking smack with your friends outside of work helped. Though, you knew that they were getting a little tired from it as well. 

After a particularly harsh argument with him, you couldn't retaliate with anything witty to say. You sulked in your own corner of the laboratory for a while, until Miguel silently placed a small, steaming hot cup of coffee on your desk. 

That moment had triggered the beginning of your actual relationship. Sometimes, the room would still be strung tight with tension, but it was better than awkwardly hanging around each other and waiting for yet another fight to start. It slowly turned into Miguel giving you rides home, Miguel buying more than just coffee for you, and Miguel staying at your place after he dropped you off.

Then he quit. 

Or did he get fired? Liberated, in corporate terms. You didn't know the full story, you got a new lab partner one day, Miguel was gone, there was no coffee on your desk anymore. There was no comfortable silence. 

It was difficult to get a hold on him with the moments that followed, you knew well that he had a tendency to brood, but never for this long. He didn't leave you on read, your messages weren't even going through. You searched his name up on social media and found nothing, a thousand other Miguels but not your Miguel. You reached out to his brother after a lot of thinking, but he couldn't come up with an answer either because his family didn't know where he went either. 

Perhaps it shouldn't have upset you as much as it should have, Alchemax viewed their employees as expendable toys. You didn't mean to get attached to him, but you had breached that line very long ago ever since the first shouting match. He was your friend now, no corporation was going to get between at least trying to talk again. 

When you had gotten a message from an unknown number, there were only two possible answers. A telemarketer or Miguel. Likely possibilities, a fifty percent chance for either. You thanked God that it was the latter. 

The power that was held in that conversation had changed the trajectory of your life forever. Miguel helped arrange a time for you to meet, the second you caught sight of him, it erupted a feeling in you that you just couldn't bring yourself to describe. 

He still looked like him, but otherwise different. His face looked more sunken in, eyebags, lines you hadn't seen on his face before. He was definitely taller, his physique was more built as well. What caught your attention the most though was his eyes, crimson red and deliberately drained of light. 

Miguel, what happened to you?

It was a long, overly extensive talk. You shouldn't have broken down over it, the events that lead up to his timely demise at his job. It wasn't your place to cry over his misfortunes, but he looked like he didn't have it left in him to cry so you took that place for him. Alchemax was your breeding ground for innovation and evolution of human society, a little shady around the edges, but you knew that you'd still be helping people in the end. After this, your hopes in that place had been quashed. Clearly if they were heartless enough to treat one of their top geneticists like this, they wouldn't be any better towards the safety and care of the populus. 

So you quit your job immediately. Miguel invited you to Spider Society and you gladly agreed, you were in no position to really decline. Besides, it was a good way to get you back on your feet again. You had become acquainted with the people that passed by in what used to be headquarters back then, Miguel trusted them with his life it seemed (despite him not being able to admit that himself though).

You'd find yourself in HQ more than in your own apartment at that point, you enjoyed being there. You had closer friends, Spider-People were better company than mad scientists anyway. You helped Miguel make this new, exciting thing from foundation to the top. It helped you become more social, it made you more comfortable opening up to people again. 

You just didn't know that it was doing quite the opposite with Miguel. 

You had blamed yourself for not noticing sooner, for not picking up the details that he wasn't doing as fine as he thought he was. When you found the doors to his office locked, you already felt your heart begin to race. You called out to Lyla and she was more than willing to answer back, "He's going through something, he hasn't really been taking his Rapture doses recently and-"

"Let me handle it," you said, firmly. "I can help him. I can fix it." 

Lyla looked at you, just looked. She didn't feel, she wasn't supposed to feel exactly. She could act like it, her programming allowed her that at least. She made perfectly calculated decisions and perfectly calculated reactions to them, when she noticed a problem, she was supposed to fix it. 

You weren't as accustomed to Lyla as other people, but you were aware of that as well. In spite of that, she still managed to be the light in conversations most of the time. Literally, when it was the dead of night, just you and Miguel strewing and caking together more reports, she'd find ways to make it more entertaining. 

That means if Lyla looked at you like she did, with so much uncertainty and inner conflict. It was like her code turned to beat like a human heart, you could hear it in the swift moment of silent she'd left you in. The hiss and whir to Miguel's office doors reeled you back in, Lyla sighed. She shouldn't sigh, she never sighed. 

"Do the right thing," she wished you off. God, I hope so, you thought to yourself. 

It was dark, obviously. You were used to it, ever since Miguel told you about how sensitive his senses can get, you didn't really mind at all. There was still light that peeked from the corners, a small monitor here and there, maybe a secret window you just didn't know about. It was cozy sometimes even to evade the blinding sunlight and stay in the darkness with Miguel. But that's not at all what it felt like when you entered. It did not embrace you, it suffocated you.

There was no accompanied noise either, no beeping from a monitor, no whirring of a machine, and no idle chatter with him and Lyla like there would always be. It was the purest form of silence, the sound of your breathing and the small pats of your shoes against the cold, metal ground was all you could hear. 

Miguel's platform was placed high up, there was absolutely no way that you could get to him without using a web shooter. Unless you could somehow convince him to lower his platform, which you really didn't want to do in the case you might accidentally say something stupid. 

"Miguel?" You yelled, stupidly. Though, it would be more stupid to try and propel yourself up to the height of his platform. One option results in humiliation until the end of your life while the other option could result in the end of your life. You weren't really looking forward to experiencing the latter.

You thought you heard him mumble something, but before you could call out his name again, he answered back. "Get out." 

The absence of cruelty in his tone was prominent to you already. He didn't have the heart to speak so coldly to you in the first place. No, he sounded scared, fearful, whether it was of you or himself, you were yet to find out the reason why. The priority right now was to talk to him, properly.

"Are you sure about that? I have a, uh, really important work file that I need you to review! The multiverse is at stake here, Miguel. Come on!"

Silence. For a few seconds. Before you heard the unmistakable click and whir of his platform, it makes its slow descent down towards you. Miguel begun to enter your vision, he had a chair pulled up and he was hunched over on his desk. Rare, you knew he liked to work when standing (oddly enough). 

"You're a bad liar," he grumbled, not even facing you as he said it. You sighed as you stepped onto the platform, placing your hands on your hips. 

"I wasn't lying, but your doors were locked and Lyla told me that there was something going on here." Miguel mumbled something else under his breath that you couldn't catch, he simply goes back to what to whatever he's doing. Which you really couldn't allow, but you couldn't push yourself into this. With him, there was always some sort of process. 

You took the moment to observe your surroundings, it was unbearably messy in here. A feat that he'd somehow been able to achieve despite being way past the age of papers, there was clutter everywhere. From beakers, liquids of mysterious origin pooled around from here to there, and even... Blood?! 

Your attention had snapped back to Miguel and that's when you had started to notice, how his shoulders rose and fell faster than usual, his hands ruffled in his hair, the rapid successions of his breath. 

"Miguel," Shock the process. Shock waiting. He clearly wasn't okay, you knew that to the fullest now. In three short strides, you were already by his side. "What's going on?"

He shook his head. Okay, you didn't want to press him too hard into talking, but this wasn't something that you could leave alone. Hesitantly, you placed a hand on one of his shoulders. He flinched, so did you, but right now, you needed to be the strongest person in the room so you kept your hand there. 

You tilted your head to the side, just so you could see his face, but he avoided your gaze. What entered your sights however was a discarded needle gun, yet to be picked up, and a few claw marks on the table. 

So this was the Rapture that Lyla was talking about. You hadn't a single clue what it was when she mentioned it, you pretended because you thought that she'd lock you out if you hadn't. Even then, there isn't much you could deduce aside from the fact that it was a drug Miguel had to take. You heard very little about the Rapture studies back in Alchemax, it was very classified, and you wish you would have pried more. 

"Do you need help with that?" You asked, trying to keep your voice as level as possible. Your thumb drew small circles into the muscle of his shoulder, his hands fell from his hair to his sides. He slumped back against his chair with a big sigh, and he nodded. 

Shakily, you picked up the gun. There was no seat for you to take, so you decided on sitting on the table. When you leaned down, the nanofabric of Miguel's suit had dissipated, revealing the fullness of his arm to you. You attempted to steady your hands over the exposed skin, Miguel doesn't even wince as the little needles pierce through. 

It will probably take a little while for the vial to empty out. You stewed in the silence with Miguel for a while, you'd usually use this as an opportunity to make conversation, but judging from his current state, he probably isn't one for talking. 

You released the breath that you were holding in when it was finished, you set the device for the side. Your hand remained on Miguel's shoulder the whole time and it tightened as you asked, "Is there–"

"No. No, I'm sorry. I'm just-" Miguel took a deep breath. "I'm- not ready to talk about it right now. It's a lot, sorry for bothering you."

He still wouldn't look you in the eye, you looked down to his hands and saw him tugging and pinching at the fabric of his suit. He'd calmed down a little now at least, but still. You couldn't help but feel like you've failed somehow, you tried to put on what's supposed to resemble a smile to him. "Okay, that's fine." 

When he dismissed you and let you (told you) to leave him alone, you promised yourself that you'd wait. You'd wait for him to be ready.

But maybe he never will. 

[seleniangnosis]

Mid Year Check In 💗🪽

Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3

Hi everyone 💌🧁! My life is keeping me quite busy, and away from the tumblr tarot community for a while now. I've done this spread for me yesterday, so I decided to share it with you as well.

The reading is intended to provide you with some help and answers on how you've been progressing this year, and a bit of what to expect next 🤍. Pick the picture/pile you're most drawn to and feel free to discard any information that doesn't resonate with you. Enjoy! And reblogs are highly appreciated

Pile 1

Hello pile one and welcome to your reading 🧁🤍

You've entered this year with a goal in mind. Whether be it personal growth and development, topping your class , or building on your finances, you were ready to do whatever it takes to get there. You might have been a bit stubborn with your plan, even to the point where you neglected other life aspects, or for others, you've been very driven on changing the circumstances you've found yourself into for a long while.

You seem to have been extremely diligent with your plans, following them trough, or created a very structured way to get you where you want to be. For those who have jobs, or were job searching, this year has been spent for sure on achieving some sort of financial abundance, or create a foundation for your career, this part is highly similar to my own reading and I can say I truly worked hard this year, so pile 2 congratulations on your hard work, and I hope you're enjoying the fruits of your labour.

You've got so many pentacles cards here pile 2 ,so yeah a lot of focus on personal development, finances, and stability.

Something you've learnt is how to be consistent in your work, life , studies etc, rely on yourself, and how to manage ideas, or maybe a situation when something doesn't go the way you planned it. Some of you might have been focused on creating business connections or just create some stable new connections in regards to work / workplace, or maybe you were focused on finding a workplace where you felt like you can grow and develop your skills.

Something that you'll have to pay more attention to, and might serve as your next lesson is related to some self introspective work, and spending some time with yourself. You seem to have been all on the grinding mindset, so much that you kinda forgot about yourself. Good work ethics are great, but I get the impression that you were overworking yourselves, and you got the results, but detached from yourself and some self care.

If you have a certain goal set in mind, go for it, but not on the expense of your health. I got an intresting mix of cards, which leave me with the idea that you're highly aware you're stressed and have been working your brains out, but you keep going because you already have your mind set on something and only after you get that thing done you'll be able to relax.

Whatever it is pile 1, I'm proud of you, but please don't forget to tend to your needs as well 🤍💌.

Pile 2

Hello pile two and welcome to your reading 🤍🧁

The message of this pile seems to be again centered around money, finances, staring a new job / moving to a different job, work. Some of you might have started as an intern in your first job, or changed your career. You might have felt a personal call to change your orientation and start something new. I'm getting that energy of " should I stay ? should I leave ? What if I get into a much worse situation if I leave this place?" . Maybe, for some of you, your workplace was toxic and no longer suitable, but you were afraid of what could happen if you don't find a better one , or none at all.

Some of you might have took a break and some time to reflect and redefine their goals. I feel like even though you were getting some reward and results, they were not worth the mental exhaustion, the stress , and what you were putting yourself trough.

It's highly possible for you to still be in this energy/ situation, because as the next lesson the universe has in store for you I got something about facing what you're afraid to face. You seem to be caught too often and too tight into your own thoughts, that you're blocking your rational thinking, so you keep yourself away from reaching that freedom. Pike 2 , how stressed you are rn? You're thinking about making a move, making a plan, you get distracted by illusory thoughts, you're back to square one.

You should start looking at the good side of the things as well, not only what can fail or go wrong. Have more faith in yourself pile two 🤍💌!

Pile 3

Hello pile three and welcome to your reading 🤍🧁

The page of pentacles showed up in all 3 piles, but for this one, the energy is centered more on self work and development. For you I'm not getting much about money, work and finances, but about new start and goals around personal development. Your year was more of a journey in the search of what works and what doesn't for you. What improvements can you be making in terms of how you think about yourself, how can you change your mindset and find more fulfilment, rather than resenting yourself for things that didn't work out. Maybe you've even been unsatisfactory with who you were , and spent time improving yourself, making better decisions that bring you healthy benefits, and enjoying the journey of these small new beginnings. You learned to have more faith in yourself, in the fact that you're capable of improving yourself.

As something that you are still about to learn, well when I picked the cards I got " committing to yourself ", so ... commit to yourself. Maybe you feel guilty about how you've changed, and even though it's a positive change for you, others might make you think you're selfish, or a bad person. Maybe you were too tolerant in the past, and now that you've learnt to take better make better decisions, others see you as too self preoccupied.

For the rest of the year your goal should be yourself. Creating stability for yourself, and share it with those like-minded, who appreciate your presence in their lives💌🤍.

[pepperangers]

ah

finally

I've found you

new follower here, and I've JUST finished Dino Charge... I'm sad

I love the series so so much and just... it's over? just like that?

dude ik ur gonna get a lot of asks about this, but... can you make more headcanons around dino charge?

thanks, Parker Quil

hii !! i absolutely LOVE dino charge its probably one of my favourite series ever so heres my gift to you in the form of everything i have in my drafts at the moment

the team loves tyler, first and foremost. he's their Red and they'd do anything he asked (and they know he'd do anything for them), but tyler has absolutely no clue. they gravitate towards him. they’d all die for him and he has no idea. they listen to everything he says and argue like kids about who his favourite is. tyler could technically rule zandar because all he’d have to do is ask phillip to do something and he wouldn't even hesitate - he’d brag to the other rangers that HE was the only one who could do this for tyler and suck it losers he’s winning. tyler is oblivious to the power he wields

despite their best efforts in learning about modern times, ivan and koda were not fit for the workplace. the cafe proved too much of a challenge, and kendall was tasked with the unfortunate job of - in the kindest way possible - firing them. instead, they chose to play to their strengths and use what they already know to be interactive staff for the museum at their respective exhibits

being a ranger team means working incredibly well together in and out of the suits. the museum cafe runs like clockwork and deliveries are unloaded and stored more efficiently than the museum has seen in years. it’s a combination of their hightened competence and abilities, and their natural need to work as a single unit. what allows this seamless teamwork? the magical bond to the energems? the Morphing Grid? the Power? who knows; but any other rangers - active or otherwise - who find themselves at the museum could spot the team from a mile away

in the search for his father, tyler got used to travelling. never staying in one place for too long and always being on the move became natural, but choosing to stay in amber beach seemed was so easy he hardly even noticed. as soon as everything died down, as soon as they were no longer needed, he stopped for a while and thought about it. it didn’t take him long to realise it wasn’t amber beach he felt bound to, but his rangers. he hadn't felt like he had a home until he met them, and he'd follow them anywhere

heckyl is intelligent - there's no denying that - but he absolutely refuses to admit that he doesn't know much about earth technology or culture. with everything that happened he never really had the time to properly learn everything, which led to an interesting altercation where he thought a toaster was some kind of dangerous explosive. koda and ivan (who are very proud at how well they’re doing in their Modern Lessons) had to explain its actual purpose. he will take this to the grave.

chase shows them all rugby. no it is not like football. zandar has a team, so world cup tournaments get pretty intense when zandar plays new zealand. ivan starts cheering for zandar with phillip, and it’s the most dramatic betrayal the cave has ever seen

kendall and chase's biggest challenge when the team first formed was teaching koda how to pronounce his dinosaur name because of how language had evolved while he was in the ice. it was a long first few battles.

during the Modern Lessons with ivan and koda, riley and kendall got too enthusiastic about catching the two up on all the modern tech and end up rambling/inventing something new. the lesson completely derailed into scientific terminology that neither were used to, and it ends in tears for one or both of the "old" ones. they went to hide in koda's cave and would only talk to keeper

riley so willingly got in the car with tyler and shelby in the first episode because some unexplainable force told him he could trust them, and that in time he'd come to care so much for them. Red and Pink are just such comforting colours, you know?

tyler sometimes forgets that ranger stuff isn’t applicable to other people and always brings up “rexie” in conversation, so most people assume he has a dog. it’s not until someone sees him talking to the t-rex skeleton at the museum that they begin to think otherwise

i feel like shelby and poisandra would be unexpectd best friends in like battle scenarios (“i love your nails” while doing a backflip followed by a “thanks! pink is my favourite colour you know!” and a morpher blast). the boys are baffled by this

*(disclaimer to anyone out there!! i know they’re all intelligent characters and i don’t mean to undermine that in any way!! these are just some silly headcanons please don’t take them too seriously<3)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I discouraged my mum from applying for a job at the same workplace as me?

I (19NB) recently got a new job. I told my mum (60F) about it and she was impressed with the job as I don't have to do much work and still get paid a decent amount. I also told my friend (18F) about it and she said I should let her know if there are any vacancies available because she's struggling to find a job.

Yesterday my mum said that she was curious about getting a job there. She searched to see if there were any vacancies available, there wasn't, but she set alerts so she'll know when there are vacancies available. I suspect this will be soon as I know that at least one of my coworkers is only working here as a summer job.

I feel awkward about the prospect of my mum working at the same workplace as me. I have bad social anxiety and while I enjoy the job, I have failed to make any friends so far, and I feel like I would become even more awkward if my mum started working at the same place as me. A lot of my coworkers are around the same age as me and I feel worried that they'll judge me as I've always had a lot of judgment from my agemates in the past. My coworkers probably already kind of think I'm weird because I don't really talk much but I'm worried they'll think even worse of me if my mum comes to work here. As well as this, my mum already has a job - she just wants more work. Additionally, in the nicest way possible, my mum is kind of embarrassing - she's very loud and always draws attention to herself - she's also quite opinionated and not afraid of getting into arguments. My mum also has a tendency to speak on my behalf and babies me a lot - I think she would start asking my coworkers why they aren't friends with me and stuff like that, which would be extremely awkward. Also I was looking forward to working at the same workplace as my friend who I mentioned earlier, because I think I would be a lot less lonely, not to mention I think I would become more confident if I had a friend with me and I think it could lead to me finally making friends with my coworkers, which is really important to me. I also cannot quit this job and move to another one for various reasons.

It could benefit my mum to get a second job - our household have struggled financially for as long as I can remember. She has struggled to find a second job because of her age - this company doesn't appear to judge people based off of their age, and I think she's likely to get accepted as she also has relevant experience. My mum is very nice and I might be being overdramatic for not wanting her at the same workplace as me.

I don't know what I'm going to do when a vacancy becomes available, because I would feel like such a shitty person if I discouraged my mum from applying but at the same time the thought of sharing a workplace with her makes me feel uncomfortable. I also don't know whether I should let my friend know when a vacancy opens up - she did express an interest in working here before my mum did, but I feel like I should put my mum first - my friend is kind of a dick anyways and she'll find it easier to find a job because of her age.

I want my mum to find a second job and I want it to be well paid and for it to be a job that she enjoys, I just don't want it to be at the same workplace as me. WIBTA if I discouraged her from applying when a vacancy opens up?

What are these acronyms?

[tia-amorosa]

Sunset Died - Wainwright/Sword/Hatch

Return Home - part 1

Later in the day. After Morgana had rested for a few hours, she returned to her workplace. There, Blair and Cy were ready to leave the clinic, Boyd leading his daughter out of the tent by the hand. "Cy? I have to thank you for taking such good care of our daughter. "/ "not for that, it's a matter of course for me"/ "I've noticed that". Boyd smiled at him. "I take it we can't go back to our old house?"/ "No, but there's a new one for you, Emma's already waiting for you two there…".

Susan is somewhat skeptical about the situation. She had the feeling that she was losing her daughter again. "But… you can come with us, Blair." Blair paused for a moment. She could hear in her voice that she was worried. "Mom, don't be mad at me, please… I'd like to stay with Cy. Don't worry, I'll be fine. But you can visit me any time, alright? ". Susan saw Cyclone took her hand lovingly. "well…if that's what you want, all right."/ "I'll have my bandages taken off in a few days, if you like, you can be there then"/ "yes, yes, please".

After Blair said goodbye to her mother with a hug, Morgana turned to her again. "The house where you'll be staying is actually quite 'blind-friendly', you'll find your way around quickly, and you're not alone"/ "mhm, thanks, Morgana. I'll come by in a few days, alright? "/ "O.K. Of course, I'm also very keen to see if everything has healed well". Blair just smiled and nodded slightly. Then they made their way to the new home together.

Cyclone walked with Blair at a slow pace towards the house Morgana had told them about. But he immediately recognized a source of danger outside. If Blair ever went outside, she wouldn't have a railing to hold on to. But she wouldn't be going anywhere alone at the moment anyway. "Hey, you two, welcome to our new home."

It was the first real home for the three of them in a long time. Sure, living in an old farmhouse has its own charm, but staying there permanently was not in their interests. They were desperate to get back home. "It smells good here, so fresh and a bit like wood. wait, do we have a fireplace?"/ "A small one, yes. We won't freeze here anyway.

Blair searched for her boyfriend again with her hands. "I'm so happy, Cy," then she felt his face. … Your beard… I've only felt you with it, but not seen you… I've been walking around in the dark for months". He smiled, which she could almost feel. "Soon no more…"/ "How are you doing, Cy? What did Morgana say?"/ "I have to take antibiotics now, so I should be better soon. And I suppose we've been given some clothes to wear?"/"Yes, a bit in each bedroom, I've already looked"/"OK, I'll go and change then.“.

A short cough. "What's where here now?" asked Cy. "Well, first of all, you need to know there's only one bathroom for all of us. But I think that's o.k. …. You can choose which bedroom you want. I like the one on the left, it's simple… The one on the right might be something for you two, more cozy in any case"/ "and here?" he pointed to the right door. "A guest room, or maybe a children's room later on"/ "ah…*cough*, o.k….".

Later. Emma helped Blair to put on something else. She literally had to rely blindly on what her friend put on her body. And She assured her that she looked good. Then Blair started to find her way around the house. She stopped at the bookshelf and ran her fingers along the spines of the books. Some of them had a slightly raised texture so that she could read the letters with her fingers and memorize the different titles she would like to read later.

She moved slowly through the room. Always feeling her way with her hands. But sometimes she would bump into something with one foot first. "Oh, what... Oh, a chair... Probably at a dining table". She leaned forward a little to search for a surface with her hand. She smiled when she realized that there really was a table there "Emma must be looking forward to cooking something".

Blair realized that the room she was in was quite large. She passed the sofa, the warm fireplace, … "What's this? Big…." She ran her hands along the edges of the object, once around and noticed the buttons at the bottom. "A… television? We have a television? Does it work?". She excitedly tried the buttons until it came on.

While Blair tried to listen to something on the television, Emma looked around outside the house. To her surprise, there were a few garden plants. "I wonder if they planted them specially? I don't think so. I've seen a few edible plants everywhere. They must have spread everywhere… It's just too bad, it'll soon be winter. Let's see if we can still get some. I can preserve the things, then we'll have a little stock".

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of this Part

@greenplumbboblover 😶😊

[randogirlo-fando-main]

Nothing New-Shane Stardew Valley x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, over drinking, depressive and intrusive thoughts, this shit is kinda sad fluff

Story Plots: Strangers to kinda friends, might make a part 2 if this does good where they friends to lovers (lot less sad than this part), sad fluff, just Shane taking care of our sweet farmer, gender-neutral pronouns, inspired by the lyrics of Nothing New (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift Ft. Phoebe Bridgers

Summary: Life seems to have gotten more complicated for this fresh start they took over a year ago and a night at the saloon makes them open up to the town drunk.

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The crisp fall breeze runs through the young farmer's hair as the trees hum a small rustle. The chill strangely welcome as it cools the puff in their cheeks and eyes. As the season comes to an end, all the work it took to be able to keep afloat during the winter has taken a toll. The emotional wreckage of the last month made throwing themselves at the farm work at hand fairly easy, not wanting much social interaction while in the funk known as "Seasonal depression". More like the entire 360 of cubicle job to running a farm (y/n) thought. They have been in the valley a little over a year and the farm has been harder than ever to keep up with. thinking back to when they last talked to Harvey. Just running into him (literally) trying to catch up to the chicken who had somehow made it all the way to town during the chase. After helping each other up and the string of apologies from both sides, took the time to take in the state of the young person in front of him.

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"(y/n), are you taking care of yourself?" The question took the farmer by surprise, someone noticing the bags under their eyes with bruises and scrapes all over. The doctor sighs, pushing his glasses back in place with his index finger.

"Just the usual, trying to get enough of an income before winter when I can't plant as many crops."

"Remember to take time for yourself, the farm is hard work, and you need to be able to take care of yourself too." He bids you a goodbye, walking back to the clinic to open up. After that, it took the farmer a moment to remember the task at hand. Find that chicken. Before they can even start the search there's a voice behind them.

"How dumb do you have to be to let a chicken get this far from home?" The gruff in the voice made the poor farmer's whole body feel like a bonfire.

"Excuse you?" Snapping around to the man holding mischievous Dotty. You take her out of his grasp, watching as she nuzzles into their arms. Before the farmer can get too worked up the man walks away, muttering something about being reckless

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God that guy gets on your nerves. Learning he is Marnie's nephew had the farmer confused on how such an amazing woman could be related to that ass. As they finally reach their destination for the night, the air starts to have a bite to it. Pulling the saloon doors open and slipping in as fast as possible, the warmth is inviting. A smile pulls on Emily's face as she sees who has entered her workplace.

"(Y/n)! I have this new liquor for you to try, I've been saving it for you." The farmer gives the girl a small smile before sitting in front of her.

"Lay it on me and keep it coming." The strain in (Y/n)'s voice made Emily pause before pouring the pink liquid. Before she could even help the next customer she heard the glass hit the wood of the bar, seeing it was already empty. Giving the farmer a cautious look before pouring a slightly larger pour.

After about an hour or so, the bar was full and the farmer realizes they came out on the one night everyone and their parents are here. They move to a booth, Emily bringing a glass of water before the next round. The talking and laughing drowns out as they play with their hair out of habit. Every so often someone would come to say hi and make small talk before moving towards their respective groups. (Y/n), finally getting a break from the interruptions lays their head down on the table with a sigh.

"I can hear you breathing you know?" The farmer declares, hearing a choked chuckle across the way.

"Thought if I sit with ya, we both won't get bothered." The voice emotionless and slightly spiked with annoyance. When Emily brings another drink the farmer downs it in one go, now seven drinks in.

"What will happen when I lose my novelty?" the farmer says, back to laying with their heading in their arms. Shane;s breathing hitches, eyes wide with confusion for a split second before going back to unfazed. The silence is deafening but with one look up from their arms, (Y/n) sees an unrecognizable emotion in his eyes as he darts back to people watching. Something tells them to continue sharing, that the silence will stay and the word vomit will just linger there for closure. Maybe that's the pink drink talking the farmer sighs at their altered brain.

"I wake up in the middle of the night and I can feel time moving. I went from a cubicle job I've had since straight out of highschool to running a goddamn farm all on my own. How the hell did my grandpa think that this-" They gesture towards the direction of the farm, wildly over expressing from the alcohol in their system.

"- would work? He could've given it to my brother! Or my cousin! Or literally anyone else. My cheeks are tired from smiling at every fucking person just so they like me. Even Alex and he just wants to get in my pants!" Suddenly there is a hand over your mouth, a hushed shh coming from Shane.

"You can vent and shit but stop screaming." He slowly moves his hand and the small movement distracts from the fact that he's moved closer to the farmer, giving his undivided attention before sipping his beer.

"How can I know everything at 18, taking that shit joja job while living with my now ex-boyfriend, but nothing at 22. 4 years shouldn't make a difference. And now that I've been here a year no one even bats an eyes anymore. It's like the excitement of a newcomer is gone and I'm invisible..." (Y/n)'s eyes shift to their fingers, picking at the hang nails. Shane's look of understanding missed, as he pushes another round to the farmer. They chug it before regretting it instantly. Emotions are heightened from the inebriation and soon tears welp up, getting pushed back as much as possible.

"shooold've -xpected it. They alwayys git bor'd of me" Despite the drunken speech, Shane caught it all. Including the sniffle as a tear falls off the person in front of him. (Y/n) can't stop the cries anymore, hiding their face in their hands before feeling an arm wrap around their shoulders and help them up from the booth. Hands still on their face, they follow the lead of Shane as he opens the door for them. The colder wind hits their faces and starts to sober them both up as he holds the farmer up, walking her home. They quietly cry in their hands for what feels like an hour, still being led home.

"How do I go from growing up to breaking down like this." The farmer half-jokes, sniffling while trying to slow their breath. The farmer catches Shane's eyes, his switching between their tear stained face and the path in front of him as he leads her through.

"Glad to know you're a person and not a ball of pep." The only words the man has spoken since the saloon. (Y/n) scoffs, before the tears come back. Shane stops the two of them abruptly before holding the farmer by the shoulders, trying to find their eyes.

"Hey hey hey hey, you said it yourself all those smiles around town were fake did I say something?" His voice slightly frazzled at the crumbling person in front of him.

"Just reminded me of stuff..." As the two of them reach the farmhouse porch, Shane tries to pull away from the farmer before their grip tightens on his shirt.

"My brain won't turn off please stay." The still drunk (Y/n) quickly blurts, almost falling over. A sequence of confusion, contemplation, and caution go through Shane as he treads lightly around the hammered person in front of him. He sighs before walking them towards the door and taking the keys from the farmer's hand. He unlocks the door and turns on the lights before walking (Y/n) to the bed and making them lay down.

"Ya can't hold your alcohol lay down." A monotony of his voice the farmer is all too familiar with, usually when the man before them is trying to not care. He walks out of the bedroom into the kitchen, the sound of the sink coming seconds later. Once it's off he comes back in with a cup of water.

"Does this make us friends?" Shane couldn't help but chuckle at the exhausted person laying in front of him.

"I don't know why you'd want to be but sure, whatever." He turns around to turn off the light.

"Get some sleep." Before he can leave (Y/n) stops him with a gag. He instinctively runs to the bathroom, assuming there would be a trash can in there, and bringing it to the farmer. After a few seconds, nothing comes up and they sigh before leaning back in the bed.

"I'll be on the couch if you need anything, Marnie will kill me if I leave without making sure you won't die." The farmers eyes are barely open, drifting back and forth from sleep. A slight nod comes from them before Shane rubs their head gently and goes into the living room. (Y/n) almost instantly falls asleep, still in their clothes from running errands and such.

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I hope ya'll like this! I haven't written in a while and while this isn't something I write a lot I just kept seeing this every time I listened to the song. It was always Shane listening to me and realizing how someone else also struggles with similar emotions. I'm going through it right now if you can't tell lol

[optimizedcuriosity]

Navigating Career Chaos: Embrace the Redirection

A break from the workforce paradox to focus on the workers and not capitalistic corp. problems.

You know what? If you're feeling like your job search is stuck in a loop and you're not getting anywhere, it's time for a change. It's like trying to fit into those jeans from high school—it's just not happening. The real issue might be that you're not fully recognizing your labor value, which is causing a disconnect in how you present yourself on your resume and LinkedIn. Let's talk about how you can realign your job search and make the most of your skills without starting from scratch.

Embrace the Redirection

Getting laid off or receiving a rejection letter can feel like a punch to the gut. But let's flip the script—it's not a "no," it's a "not now," or better yet, a redirection. Think of it as the universe's way of saying, "Hold up, I've got something better in store for you." Just like in *Game of Thrones*, when they say, "Winter is coming," it's a reminder that challenges are inevitable, but so is growth and new opportunities.

Riding the Layoff Coaster. (Makes my stomach a bit queasy already)

2024 has been a roller coaster, with layoffs up by 37% compared to the past five years. It feels like the universe decided to shake things up a bit too much. But here's the thing: you're not starting from zero; you're starting from experience. This is your chance to pivot and explore new opportunities. Think of it as a career makeover—time to reinvent yourself!

Kicking Mental Barriers to the Curb

Let’s get real about those mental barriers. You know, the ones that whisper, "You're not good enough" or "You can't do this." It's time to kick them to the curb. You've got a decade of experience under your belt—you're basically a workplace wizard. Set realistic goals, challenge those negative thoughts, and watch your confidence soar.

In 2023, a significant 86% of employees experienced at least one mental health challenge, with anxiety becoming the top issue in the workplace[3][5]. Fast forward to 2024, and mental health remains a critical concern, with 57% of employees experiencing moderate levels of burnout[5]. The good news? The stigma around mental health is decreasing, with 89% of employees reporting that their leaders now openly discuss mental health issues, compared to just 35% in 2020[1]. This shift is crucial as work stress continues to impact personal lives, with 47% of employees saying work is their primary stress source[1]. By addressing these mental barriers and fostering open discussions about mental health, you can create a healthier work environment for yourself and others. Remember, taking care of your mental health is just as important as any other aspect of your career.

The Power of Transferable Skills: Upskilling and Reskilling for a career boost!

Transferable skills are like the Swiss Army knife of the job world. They're versatile, adaptable, and employers love them. Skills like leadership, communication, and problem-solving can take you far, whether you're leading a team or managing a project. Highlight these gems on your resume and in interviews to show employers you’re ready to rock any role.

In today’s ever-changing job market, upskilling and reskilling are your secret weapons. Upskilling is all about leveling up your current skills, while reskilling is learning new ones to transition into different roles. These strategies not only make you more competitive but also keep you from having to start at the bottom again. Also, don’t wait for your employer to mention the idea (they’ll likely say it was their idea) take action to stay ahead of the curve!

Tips for Upskilling and Reskilling:

- Mentoring and Job Shadowing: Think of it as a backstage pass to new roles. You get to learn the ropes and gain new insights.

- Online Learning: There are tons of courses out there, and many companies will even foot the bill. It’s like Netflix binging, but for your career.

- Self-Directed Learning: Grab a book, watch a video, or dive into online resources. It’s like a DIY project for your brain.

Targeting the Right Roles & Career Transition Ideas

With over ten years of experience, you should be aiming for roles that match your expertise. Think of positions like Operations Project Manager, Senior HR Business Partner, or Creative Director. These roles let you flex your skills and show off your experience, positioning you as a valuable candidate for upper-level management or senior executive positions. (I mentioned how they aren't retiring before which makes this difficult, but with the way the world is you never know what can happen so be prepared to strike when the opportunity comes available~)

Thinking about a career change? Consider roles that align with your existing skills. Teachers, for example, might transition to Learning & Development Program Managers, while those with sales experience could move into Relationship Manager roles. It's all about leveraging what you already know while exploring new horizons.

Workforce Trends and Stats

The job market is shifting faster than TikTok trends. A whopping 70% of workers are prepping for potential layoffs, while 75% of HR leaders are focusing on upskilling to bridge skills gaps[1][3]. The adoption of AI is reshaping jobs, with 68% of workers fearing it could increase unemployment. But fear not—this is your chance to upskill and stay ahead of the curve.

Remember, you’re not just another job seeker. You’re a seasoned professional with a lot to offer. By understanding your value, breaking down mental barriers, and strategically targeting roles that fit your experience, you can turn your job search into a success story or an opportunity. Embrace your transferable skills! You’ve got this!

Sincerely, The slightly unhinged millennial mom friend who believes in you.

Citations:

[1] https://organizations.headspace.com/blog/the-workforce-state-of-mind-in-2024

[2] https://bhw.hrsa.gov/sites/default/files/bureau-health-workforce/Behavioral-Health-Workforce-Brief-2023.pdf

[3] https://www.lyrahealth.com/2023-state-of-workforce-mental-health-report/

[4] https://www.epspros.com/news-resources/white-papers/2024/the-increasing-importance-of-mental-health-in-the-workplace.html

[5] https://www.shrm.org/topics-tools/news/benefits-compensation/anxiety-top-mental-health-issue-workplace-compsych

[6] https://www.nami.org/support-education/publications-reports/survey-reports/the-2024-nami-workplace-mental-health-poll/

[7] https://www.spill.chat/mental-health-statistics/workplace-mental-health-statistics

[8] https://www.apa.org/pubs/reports/work-in-america/2023-workplace-health-well-being

[novoplata]

You are where you need to be.

I got confirmed at my new job last week. After nearly eight months of incessant complaining, applying for new jobs (unsuccessfully) and sending in my resignation letter (also unsuccessfully), I finally accepted that I'm probably where I need to be after all. At least, in this current season of my life.

This time last year, I was already ruminating about how I was stuck in a rut of a job that wasn't getting me anywhere. Sure, the job was comfy, it offered me everything I needed at the time: a paycheque that paid the bills, a workplace that was near my home and plenty of convenience to swing by the box each day.

However, comfy was not what I was supposed to be stuck at yet. At 39, I was at a juncture of my life where I could either press on to pursue a career progression or stay where I was and be content. Global inflation has steadily skyrocketed since the end of the pandemic and I knew that with my stagnating paycheque, I wasn't going to be comfortable for long.

Also, I knew that finding a new job that pays better after 40 would be more challenging. It was time to make that leap out of my comfort zone. I started sending out my resume in July and was faced with a slew of rejections. Luckily, I landed a new job that pays better than expected in December.

Adjusting to a new environment after nearly four years of going at a leisurely pace was admittedly challenging. It was my first time working for a GLC and the company culture wasn't what I had experienced before.

I was depressed for a good six months into the job, though it pays really well. But after unsuccessfully going about my job searches, I realised that I might as well make the most of my situation while I'm here.

As much as I hated working in a politically motivated environment, I have to admit that the perks of working here are some of the best I've received in my 19 years of working. I might as well milk my entitlements before the next season rolls around.

My goal, as always, is simple: to continue learning and growing. Who knows, I might get to become a Communications Director in five years, or a General Manager / CEO in 10 years. The sky is the limit!

Best of all, I know now that I would never have been able to dream of reaching the top of my career progression had I stayed as a copywriter for a boutique digital marketing agency. Progress requires a series of stepping stones, and this job is one of them.

[margellaine]

In my early 20s

I haven't been writing much as compared to when I was in college. I still have that skill for deep reflection and gaining insights in my day-to-day life, and basically making sense of things but as I grew older, I became more quiet and discreet about these thoughts. It's kind of conflicting actually because a part of me wants to share wisdom and wants to inspire other people but then the other part of me is telling me I should just keep it to myself. I'm very big on my daily affirmations and manifestations and one of them is still to inspire other people and impart wisdom. I processed where this fear of speaking up came from and I think it was because I kept telling myself before that I wasn't really good at writing. I am good at speaking, I feel I have the charisma for it and I have had a lot of exposure from it but writing seems kind of daunting for me because when you do write, there's an evidence of what you've said and if you were to say something wrong, people can still come back to it and judge you. The fear of being perceived, the fear of being wrong, the fear of failing. Well, as someone who is very persistent at getting better all the time and someone who has a lot of thoughts lol, I think i'll just start small. I feel like this is a good platform because nobody here really knows me personally and people here are more carefree than in any other platforms.

Anyway, enough about that. Today I wanted to talk about how I am navigating through my early 20s. I am 24 btw. As compared to most people, I've already figured out what I wanted to do in my life early on and so goal setting and decision making was quite easy. I know people keep telling me to enjoy my 20s, well I am enjoying my 20s, just not in the way people imagined. I am in a field that I actually love, I enjoy my jobs both part-time and fulltime job, I enjoy my graduate studies, and basically I enjoy everything that I'm doing right now. Although I am mostly busy, I work 7 days a week, 5 days for my full-time job and part-time job. I don't go out as much as other people because most of my day is occupied with work. Of course, I get tired and burnt out too because my work entails listening to people about their mental health issues and well-being but overall I feel fulfilled with my job. I feel a sense of purpose and I have a strong drive to grow and learn everyday. Work-life balance, I am working on it. I'm making conscious choices to rest more. I'm making it an intention to have a day free for myself to rest. I'm also including it in my monthly plans to do something creative or do something new. Right now, I would say I'm struggling with my search for a 'community'. I grew up being involved in a lot of communities, civic organizations, community organizations, school organizations, creative groups and when I graduated, I had less and less of that. Of course I have my new community, my workmates from both jobs but well, that's work and I've learned that relationships in workplaces are quite complex. I feel like right now, I need a community where I can just be my creative and passionate self. I used to belong to a number of communities in music, theater, and arts but right now, my life is quite different that I can't imagine yet going back to that kind of lifestyle as I know that when I do go back to those communities, I become very invested to it. So i'm thinking maybe this is the time for me to explore new things too.

Speaking of exploring and trying new things, it brings me to the topic of insecurity and social pressures. I was listening to a podcast earlier where they were saying that people in their 20s right now experience more pressure than people in their 20s before. The pressures came from of course, social media. They said that because of social media, you get to see what other people are doing and it gives you the idea of what you could be doing too and there's so many pressures out there, so many information, so many options, that you feel more pressure to actually "enjoy your 20s" that you end up not enjoying it at all. I found that insightful because it verbalized one of the reasons why I've withdrawn so much from social media. I used to be all over social media not just for personal purposes but also professional purposes. I was a performer then and had a bit of influence in terms of music and performing. It was fun at first putting out your creative self out there, opportunities came left and right, getting appreciation from people until the effects of being in the limelight affected my self-esteem and mental health. Along with other personal traumatic incidents, I had to go under the social media radar. It was hard at first of course, but the more I stayed away from it and found other ways to spend my time instead of posting and scrolling on socmed, it became easier. I'm proud to say that I don't ever feel the need to know what others are posting anymore, I don't feel the need to let other people know what I'm doing too, and overall socmed is just very easy to remove from my day to day activities at this point. My use of socmed now is more intentional and I'm able to filter what content is best for me to consume. I love that. Of course, most people now don't know what i'm doing in my life. That's okay. I'm content with my interactions with people now. I am able to set healthier boundaries. And well, it's kind of cool to be lowkey and mysterious lol.

Anyway, all I'm saying is I'm proud of how I'm handling my 20s. It's not perfect and I still feel pressure too but it's more of pressure from the real world, not from what I perceive online. I'm proud to be part of the "outliers". My lifestyle right now helps me function more on internal values rather than external circumstances. Sure, I get insecure every once in a while but because I'm already sure and set on what I want for myself, it's easier now to get back on my real purpose, my sense of self, and decide based on that. In effect, less likely for me to stray from my path. Paired with my highly organized but also flexible way of goal-setting behaviors, it's easier for me to achieve things and do things that really contribute to the life that I've envisioned for myself. Many people may not understand my methods and it's effect on my behavior and relationships with them, but that's okay. I've recently learned that that's a good thing. It helps me recognize the people who will really appreciate me for who I am. It may be isolating sometimes, but that only challenges me to confront myself and the insecurities that my arise from that. It helps me sit with myself and not run away from myself, take accountability of my actions, be more responsible, and contribute more to the things that really matter. Wow, I actually love my life and I'm content with what I have now at the same time have it in me to keep pursuing a better life for me and my loved ones. Although my path may still have bumps and obstacles along the way but it's clear and sure and that helps me enjoy the journey even more. I should cherish this more.

[prismagpie]

She hadn't told him to shut up so he was off to a better start than he had expected. This was a pretty chill workplace overall, a detail that probably contributed quite well to the fact this was the longest he'd gone without getting fired (that, and the fact he hadn't stolen anything from this store but that's another conversation for another day), but he wouldn't be surprised if chasing away customers through the sheer power of Talking Too Much changed that. And, because she didn't seem too bothered, he was finally able to look up and meet her face on instead of staring down at the scuffed toes of his Doc Martens. "Nothing wrong with not being from Anchorage," he said, raising his hands up as though in surrender, "If anything, I'm saying the opposite. I think the fact they care is a good thing. I was born here and what am I doing? Standing here, talking shit." He placed his hands back down on the register and flashed an awkward grin, like it was an achievement but not one he was all that proud to share.

Her own theory was, however, worth thinking about. It was cynical, sure, and painted an unpleasant light on the people who were putting themselves at risk to find a missing woman. Ash did genuinely believe that these people's hearts were in the right place; surely, most of them must actually care enough to be putting the effort in, especially now it seemed like there was an actual threat. If these search parties were good for little more than boosting a few egos, the risks didn't seem worth it. But he supposed nobody had to be malicious for what she said to be true; it was only human nature to worry about your own loved ones. Ash had friends, sure, but he wondered if his own lack of meaningful connections was starting to twist his point of view. It wasn't like he had much of a family to fear for.

"I've been worn down a while," Ash shrugged, "It's great that people are volunteering to help but, if every other disappearance for the last thirty years are anything to go by, that girl's long gone." In all that time, an uncertain era beginning a good eight years before Ash was even born, they had found exactly one disappeared person and even she'd shown up with her head sawn off. He'd never been given a reason to think off as Anchorage as anything other than a sordidly hopeless place. "I don't love talking about it," said Ash, and it was clear from the way he had started to fidget with his earrings that he meant it, "But I've already kind of done that whole song and dance. My dad just up and vanished one day. Poof. Just like that." It wasn't a grand reveal or a well-kept secret; go ask anybody who lived in the trailer park at the time and they could tell you all about it. He remembered the way they'd look at him, like he'd been reduced to a tragic news headline. As an adult, he tried to cast a more understanding light on those memories but, at the time, he'd always felt that they were only ever pretending to care. Nobody ever reached out to help. "And what about you?" He'd tried coming to some conclusion about her from her purchases but he was coming up short. Ash was no detective. "What's your situation?"

She had been simply trying to buy a record to play for lulling her toddler to sleep. If classical music played during infancy made babies smart, then would soft rock make them more alert and playful? She supposed she would one day find out. She had intended to run her errands quickly, paranoid about leaving the three year old alone for too long. Truly, Mirai didn’t know what exactly she had done to earn such bad luck, stepping up to the register. The bad luck, of course, being the cashier that seemed eager to rant about their various theories on the disappearances in Anchorage. 

It wasn’t anything new — anxiety had swept the town, and most of the conversations she overheard was about the disappearances, or the events that had transpired over first couple months of the new year. It was concerning at first, but now it was simply tiring. What was the point in talking about it, if they were powerless to stop or investigate what was going on? Certainly, none of the small talk and gossip done by the ladies in the grocery aisle provided comfort. And this speech was just another drop in the bucket of endless rambling — an attempt of explanation without any true solution. 

Still, she kept her expression neutral — encouraging, even — as he spoke. “I’m not from Anchorage,” she replied dryly when he was finally finished, though a small, teasing smile followed, implying that she didn’t take offense. “Disappearances happen everywhere, though I suppose it’s unexpected in a place with a lower crime rate.” She hummed, pushing the records closer to him so he could ring them up. “And people are banding together because they’re concerned that the same thing that happened to the girl will happen to those they care about.” Perhaps a pessimistic view of the situation; the selfishness of humans to distort tragedy in a way that came back to themselves, but optimism had long lost its purpose in her life — Mirai much preferred to be realistic. Her voice grew soft, curious. “Have you also been worn down? Is there anyone out there you care enough to be concerned about?”

[boop-le-snoot]

masterpost • main masterlist • taglist & faq

Introductory prologue. The main pairing will be established ironstrange x reader. This story will be rated explicit, have some canon-typical violence and language. The 'fuck' harvest is bountiful this time of the year. Updates - irregular so far, I'm posting it as I go.

No y/n, no "you", no name - nickname only, no reader description - race/age/body type neutral, she/her pronouns. Please leave a comment if you spot a stray 'blushing' or the likes, I write as it flows and sometimes miss those words when I proofread. I try to be inclusive of all my readers.

"Your total is twelve dollars, seventeen cents," I rattled off on autopilot, casting a glance at the cash register and plastering an automatic smile onto my face. The pleasant expression was frozen on it, stuck like glue, despite the news I had received earlier in the day. "Thank you, have a nice day," I doubted the customer actually heard my words.

One of those business-types, wearing a tailored two-piece, with a Bluetooth headset attached to their ear and brain always a mile away, our little coffee shop a mild interruption in their daily routine of making more and more money. "Hello, how can I help you?" I addressed the next customer, my eyes unseeing, gliding over their face and to the storefront where I noticed we were running low on eclairs and carrot cake.

"Hey, Starlight," the woman's voice was familiar, tone soothing, as I snapped my eyes to meet a pair of reddish-brown ones, staring at me with concern. "The usual," our city's very own superhero; Wanda Maximoff stood before me with her head curiously tilted to the side and her brother hovering behind her, examining the assortment of various cakes on display. "Long day?"

"You have no idea," I sighed, sending off the organic, single-use cups with scribbles off to Dave, our barista. Wanda's order was large, usually about ten or twelve coffees and quite a few treats, so I donned on some nitrile gloves to package the treats while Dave handled the drinks with practiced ease. I admired his stoicism. "Might be seeing a bit less of me," the woman's eyebrows rose in displeasure at my admission.

"Tony won't be happy," Wanda mumbled, side-eyeing the backdoor behind which my boss usually resided during the day. "You got fired?" The words attracted the attention of her brother. Pietro was immediately at her side, joining into the concerned staring.

"Nope," I popped the 'p', methodically shoving the food in its packaging. "The café is expanding hours and our shifts are being split now. Jeremy is dead set on me working the graveyard shift, so I'll be here six AM to two PM," I couldn't help the sigh that left my lips.

My boss, Jeremy, had opened his boulangerie little over two years ago, and as he had predicted, it set off almost immediately. The place was located almost in the heart of the dozen corporate sky-rises full of busy, wealthy people who liked their things to be both instant and luxurious. Jeremy had fit right in with the law sharks and business vultures, if you ask me, with his penchant for demanding the impossible.

I was expecting an increase in work hours, I wasn't going to lie - our little cafe was busy nearly all the time it was open - but the fact that he chose to split a day's shift came as a punch to the gut. Like most service staff, I made most of my money from the tips, and they and they only were the only reason I stayed in a place with a shrew for a boss and the worst health insurance in the area. Thankfully, the rich businessmen from local offices didn't count their money and left me more than generous tips.

The coffee machine beeped for the last time as Dave passed me the three cupholders before I carefully bagged them, arranging the treats on top. I saw Wanda lick her lips at the aromas coming from the paper bag before Pietro snatched them out of my grasp. I rattled off the total, catching Wanda's eye as she passed me several twenty dollar bills, waving off my attempt to return the change.

"Penny for your wandering thoughts?" She smiled warmly as I chuckled at the question I've grown to expect with a quiet sort of joy.

The first time she'd wandered in, soaking wet from the rain and looking as lost as a child in a mall, ten minutes before closing time, I was reading my book right at the counter as I waited for the coffee machine to clean itself. I hadn't even noticed the quiet woman until her words startled me out of the book-induced trance and I shamefully had to ask her to repeat herself, hastily shoving my book under the counter. She smiled at me, shyly, and asked me about my reading instead of rattling an order for one of the sickly sweet caffeine concoctions female customers seemed to love. And she returned in a few days, asking the same question after taking a careful look at my face.

"And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about." I took a careful moment to recall a paragraph from the book I was currently reading, Murakami's 'Kafka on the Shore'. It seemed fitting, with all that had been going on in my life recently. I was still caught in the middle of the storm, unsure if I'd make it out but hoping for it nonetheless.

"That's beautiful," Pietro smiled at me, the tips of his silver hair reflecting the lights of the cafe's baroque style chandeliers. I barely managed to smile at him as he was already speeding off, the entrance door banging shut behind a blur of white and blue. Each time he did that, I couldn't help but wonder how he managed to not spill any of the hot beverages.

"Because it's true," Wanda added with a comforting smile. I nodded in agreement, hoping some of her positive attitude would dissipate the sense of doom I'd been lugging around all day. She departed, taking the sense of comfort with her, as I caught the tail end of something shouted in Sokovian - something that sounded exactly in place, coming from one disgruntled sibling to another.

When the residents of the nearby Stark tower began frequenting my workplace, I barely had the composure to stifle my quiet fangirling to socially acceptable levels. Not long after the Scarlet Witch turned a semi-regular, she started bringing her colleagues with her - Hawkeye at first, who was a decent, normal dude; he looked like an exasperated dad and Pietro appeared every thing the rambunctious son, as the younger man peppered the older man with questions about the cakes on our display.

They all had fancy names, but at the bottom of it, a chocolate cake was a chocolate cake. That much I told them, with a snort, earning myself a lopsided grin and a generous tip as I patiently listed off the more commonly used, simplified designations for the twins as the knowledge of them being European immigrants crossed my mind.

After Hawkeye came the Black Widow, and then Captain America with a sunny smile and his moody boyfriend in tow. While Bucky Barnes' expression was generally sour, the man had a wicked sweet tooth, shoveling frosted, glazed treats at the rate of a competitive eater. Both men were extremely polite if not very chatty and tipped well.

Tony Stark himself - well, he was a special one. His sense of humour trailed on the fine line of obscene, oftentimes raising the eyebrows of nearby people standing in line. I wasn't born yesterday, either: years of customer service work left me with little-to-no surprise regarding overzealous men and I could quip back equally as sharply, just slightly south of Tony's own jokes. He never overstepped, however, and with time, I developed a quiet appreciation for our small talks.

Which did brighten up my day, if only a little. "A little birdy told me your boss is being a douchebag. Want me to clean up that muck?" Tony was, as usual, wearing a bespoke suit and sunglasses, which he'd pushed up to his forehead as he frivolously leaned on the counter after placing his order.

I sighed, remembering Wanda's words. I didn't know what to expect from the eccentric billionaire; last of all, I didn't want any handouts. I'd started a search for a second part-time job the very day I got told my pay would be essentially cut in half. "No need, Mr. Stark, I'm gonna be fine and dandy," I replied with a smile that I was sure didn't really reach my eyes. "We'll still be able to resume our nice chit-chat at brunch on Saturdays," I winked, hoping to keep up the usual light atmosphere of our banter.

"I told you to call me Tony!" He exclaimed, like always, shaking his head and glaring at the back door. "Yeah, no," the man had absolutely no chill. "I'll still sic the IRS on him," the last part was said quietly. Mr. Stark often spoke to himself.

I laughed at the rich-kid, spoilt way he was acting. A grown man with an attitude of a teenager and a sweet tooth to match one - except for his coffee. That was always the strongest, blackest one we had on hand. I hadn't even heard of a triple espresso until Mr. Stark had waltzed in, skipping the line and filling the air around him with the smells of cologne that smelled like money, motor oil, iron and soot.

The moment I opened my e-mail at home, I felt my gloomy mood worsen, Mr. Stark's words echoing in my head. I'd sent my resumes to two dozen places and only a handful even bothered to reply - all preemptive rejections, there weren't businesses needing a part-time employee with a useless degree, who could only work evenings. Except bars, but they required some sort of certificate for bartenders and lots and lots of bare skin for waitresses. I tried to steer away from that part of the industry as much as I could, saving it as a last resort option.

It had come down to browsing Craigslist as I ate my way through a carton of cheap take-out, too exhausted to cook and too anxious to go out to the nearby bodega after 9 PM. One more negative side of working late shift - making my way home in the dead of the night in NYC and hoping Spider-Man was hanging out nearby should a thug decide on me to be their next victim. The joys of big city life.

As the column of various ads stared at me with various suspicious offers to make quick money, ads for 'young, sociable women' and I stared back at them in muted disgust. The 'looking for a job' section was much more sensible with the few ads I'd clicked on out of curiosity depicting people seemingly in a similar situation as me - short on money but not desperate enough to surrender their dignity to corporate greed. The decision was momentary - I'd started typing and hit the post button before I was through with my food, slapping my old laptop shut as soon as the as posted.

Hopefully, the creeps will stay away. The next couple of days stretched out slowly as I got up at the crack of dawn to open the shop, served the early birds whilst sipping my own matcha latte and clocked out not a second later than 2PM, taking home half the usual amount of tips. My e-mail remained as silent as ever, only a few suspicious replies to my ad, texts that I didn't even bother replying to. Human trafficking and pyramid schemes, was that all that NYC had to offer?

Apparently, not. Around 6PM, my phone dinged as a notification popped up and I scrambled to read it - all too aware of the upcoming rent day, and was pleasantly surprised with the contents of the e-mail, re-reading it several times to make sure there weren't any hidden stones under the water. I replied with my phone number, not expecting it to ring within minutes of hitting the send button.

"Hello?"

"Hi, we just corresponded," the voice on the other side was feminine but slightly rough, as if it's owner spent days chain-smoking. "I would like to invite you for a small interview, if you wouldn't mind."

I chewed on my lip in contemplation. "Could I ask you some questions first?" The levels of anxiety, I thought, were reasonable in the situation. It mutely gnawed at my chest.

"Sure," the woman agreed amicably. "My name is Odette, by the way," she mentioned off-handedly, the name fitting her voice in a strange way.

"Uh, well," I stammered. "You mentioned it's a herbal medicine shop, you're not selling weed under the counter, are you?" I voiced my worries meekly, hoping for an honest answer.

The woman laughed, a sharp, terse sound. "No, dear, I do not sell or possess anything illegal. I merely offer supplies for the locals that prefer natural, alternative medicine." She sounded jovial.

"Like - um, healing crystals?" I vaguely remembered reading about them on the internet, or seeing them in a YouTube video, perhaps.

"Yes, we sell those, too," her tone grew more joyful at the mention of the shiny rocks. I didn't think that they actually cured anything, to be honest, however I was willing to give it some credit - the placebo effect was a scientific fact. Whatever floats your boat, I guess.

"Okay then," I chuckled nervously. "I'm free tomorrow after 3 PM."

"Grand. The shop is open until 10 PM, just say your name at the counter and I'll be right with you."

As soon as I hung up, relief and curiosity and trepidation blossomed within me, imagination unhelpfully supplying images of human trafficking documentaries, basements with chains and other, less horrifying but still unusual things. The pep talk over a wine glass that I had was necessary: it was a herbal shop, for fuck's sake. Worst case, I'm going to work with Karens who think the Earth is flat and quartz cures cancer. I could even get a funny story or two out of those, something to share with Bucky or Wanda in lieu of the usual book quotes I entertain them with.

The day went by smoothly, the café no more and no less busy than usual so after a brief detour back home to put on something that didn't smell like coffee grounds and yeast: comfortable pants and a soft sweater, something that would keep me warm but would not unnecessarily restrict any movement. My good luck charm, a large oval necklace with a shiny gold star in the middle, hung heavily around my neck, providing quiet comfort.

Heart thudding in my chest, I approached the old-style, inconspicuous building, double-checking the address before opening the old, heavy wooden door right at the corner of the building. It was like a movie scene, in a way - the day was overcast, meager sun rays shining through the lead curtain of clouds, the streets were clear and few honks rung out in the far end of block, sending a flock of pigeons into a lazy scatter over the slanted roof. The door creaked softly, the handle cold under my touch, instantly filling my nose with a strong smell of herbs so plentiful, I could not distinguish one from another.

Inside didn't look any less intriguing: the décor was outdated but somehow fitting and homely, high wooden shelves stocked with glass jars and wooden boxes with neatly placed labels on them. The counter was empty - save for a large, golden bell, which I timidly pressed.

The woman who emerged from behind the worn cotton curtains behind the counter most certainly was impressive. Tall and broad, with dark eyebrows and even darker eyes, she critically surveyed me for a moment, making me shiver under her gaze - and then she smiled, revealing rows of pearly white teeth and instantaneously losing the imposing aura around her.

"Um, hi- I'm-" I didn't get to finish my nervous stammering.

She interrupted me with a careless wave of her hand. "Here for the interview. Yes. Welcome, Star," her eyes briefly fell on my necklace while I struggled to swallow the unease.

I hadn't told her my nickname - to be honest, these days, I heard it more often than my given name. People quickly took notice of my love of star-patterned items and teased me relentlessly over it, losing heat only when I calmly went along with it, too used to hearing the same jokes since my early childhood.

Odette motioned me over, parting the curtains to reveal a tiny, but tastefully decorated hall with two doors on each side and a staircase at the far end of it. I followed her into the room on the left, which turned out to be a peculiar sort of office. I thought I noticed an Ouija board in there but wisely kept my mouth shut.

"I live on the floor above the shop so don't go throwing any parties while you're on the job," she remarked playfully, gesturing to a pot of tea. "It's peppermint, does wonders for calming one's demeanor," the gesture was sweet - and very telling.

I wondered if I looked as spooked as I felt. After all, it didn't seem like Odette and her business were fishy in any way, and the décor and atmosphere were quite... Appealing, in a way. Something magical, something belonging in Europe or on a high schooler's Pinterest board. I sipped my tea in-between questions, thinking how maybe, I could actually grow accustomed to this place.

The shopkeeper acted as if I'd already accepted the job and I - well, it's not like I had any other options waiting for me. The pay was more than I expected it to be, for such a small bodega and a part-time shift, and it would help me cover my bills with enough to spare. The customers were said to be mostly regular and undemanding, with a few rare exceptions, and should I need assistance, the owner was always a call and a floor away.

With a considerably lighter heart, I left to pad the damp sidewalk back towards my house. Thankfully, my new workplace was only a short walk away.

The tag list is open until the story is finished. Please use the 'taglist' Google form to request (top of the fic, clickable link).

@mikariell95 @letsby @sleep-i-ness @toomanyrobins @mostly-marvel-musings @persephonehemingway @schemefrenzy @lillsxd @bluecrazedandbeautiful @slothspaghettiwrites

[universalcas]

I promise this is not to start drama or anything, I love your blog. I just don't know who to ask and you seem like you may know. Why is the fandom mad at Jared? I left the fandom for a bit cause life, and I came back and it seems like a lot of people are mad at him? Like his name is being censored, what drama did I miss? I'm so confused please send help lol Thanks for running such a fun blog!

Hello! I'm glad you like the blog. 🥰 Keep in mind that I've been here since November 2021 so I'm pretty new to this whole thing.

I know there is a post circulating out there with screenshots and a more detailed explanation of things that have happened but basically I would describe him as the type of person who has never been told 'no'. He is known for his """"""pranks""""" on set and, believe me, there aren't enough quotes to refer to what he did as "pranks". His behavior has caused problems on set, when it doesn't border directly on workplace harassment. He is not a person you would want to voluntarily share space for a long time with. Then there is his behavior in public. He has aggressively shown on social media his dissatisfaction with services he has received (I think I remember something related to an incident during a flight or in a restaurant, or maybe both) and giving personal information that, if I remember correctly and due to its repercussion (he is famous, after all) has resulted in those workers being fired. Basically he is already known on Twitter for the tantrums he throws from time to time (when the prequel was announced, for example).

There are many more reasons (his comments at cons making some nasty comparisons, his presence at events organized by well-known anti-vaccines...).

You will see his name censored in this part of the fandom, mostly, because it is an easy way to prevent this type of posts calling him out for his behavior from appearing in the tags (or through searches) and therefore attracting unwanted interactions from people who support him unconditionally and uncritically.

I must admit that I am not the best blog if you want to know more details because I tend to ignore him since I don't consider he is worth spending a second of my time but probably if someone sees this message they will be able to add more information.

Hope it helps.

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Happy new year everyone 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

I know 2020 has been hard for everyone.

And I want everyone to know, suffering isn't a contest and we all suffer in different ways. But I feel I should give my year in Review. Just some things that happened to me personally.

This was an intense, and long and spiritual and emotional journey for me...

I really discovered what it meant to have community, family and what my life means to me.

But I feel I need to get this in writing cause I can remember the year with vivid detail and I will probably forget if I don't get it down.

Do I have to share this publically online to my tumblr account for a bunch of strangers to see? not really.

Do I want to?

Yes. I think so. Just from how so many people on tumblr and real life have touched me.

This is kinda long and no one needs to read this.

(idk how to do a readmore on mobile. But this is where I would add it later. No one needs to read if they don't want to.)

January/February: (and some background on the last five years of my life cause.....well. it's important.)

As people knew, I got way into Invader Zim last summer. I spent most of my waking life working a dead end job at a grocery store. I lived a sad lonely life, going straight home to a single dark studio apartment. With not many material possessions outside of games, my laptop and my tablet to my name. Half of my material loves, such as home furnishings and books were still in boxes from when I moved in. In case I ever had to move again, or get some "big screenshot or copywriter" job in the city.

....

I lived in that city in the same dead end job and apartment for five years.

No friends. No social life. I often refused to make doctor appointments or attempt to establish myself in that city. I didn't even talk to anyone in my workplace.

Work. Go online. Go to sleep.

I lived like that for five years.

I thought it was good.

Even my therapist thought I was doing well.

When I really wasn't. My main character flaw I struggle with is motivation.

I can talk to someone about very detailed plans I have to fix a problem... But I tend to never follow through.

Just because I can describe in detail how to fix my personal problems, it doesn't mean I will do it.

(I have gotten better at this but it's a major struggle)

I might have been a Zombie during the day...

But by night I was pouring my soul into my AU and my analysis.

After being so thoughly ignored or overlooked by the Naruto fandom and the Undertale fandom, I felt like I had finally found my home and was settling into a community there.

I just loved that people loved what I had to say.

Especially my AU.

It's no secret that a lot of themes in my au revolve around found family, grief, and loss.......

Fatherhood, in particular.

What it means to be a father, how much do you need to try when you mess up, how willing should a child forgive their parent, especially those that have wronged you and how much of it is factually accurate and simply a self projection of what children want their parents to be and visa versa... What amount of forgiveness and change is nessasary...is it needed?

....

It's no secret that a lot of my AU is a giant coping mechanism for my Dad's death. Espessially the falling out and growing closer with a lot of my family members throughout the years following his death. (Most of the time I keep it ambiguous to how it relates to my personal life unless I include a readmore that states so outright. I feel my au can be enjoyed by a variety of people in the fandom who don't need to know me as a person or my life story.)

My Dad passed away in 2016 in February and my family still feels the aftershocks to this day.

It's part of the reason I moved to the city, alienated myself from my family and people that loved me and refused to experience life for five years.

My entire world was Zim, and I was okay.

March: When America finally realized and started to feel the effects of the pandemic....

A lot of people got scared.

Me included.

I didn't have any streaming services or access to the news. So I only heard accounts from my mom.

I didn't understand why the store was so dead quiet and empty for a few days, then it went into mass chaos and panic in the span of two days.

It felt like Retail black friday in the worst way. Everyone was packed like sardines. Everyone was yelling. The lines at the registers bled into the clothing department.

I was witness to customers shoving others for toilet paper, being rude to cashier's and just overall unpleasantness.

At the time, I didn't even fully grasp what the pandemic was, and I feel a lot of people at the time didn't either.

I ended up absentmindedly scratching my eyebrow in front of a customer and she screamed and villanised me for it. That they didn't want groceries touched by my "unclean hands"

I ended up breaking down into tears.

The customer behind me gave me a hug and told me I was doing a great job.

But the damage was done. It was the final straw, I couldn't stop crying and I was breaking apart.

Thankfully my Boss (the one who likes me) pulled me aside and asked what's wrong.

It was then that I quit. No notice. Same day. I had to get out of there.

I was planning to move to an apartment with my sister in the summer, but my Mom offered for me to move back in with her temperarily just so I can get out of the city and away from the pandemic.

So I did.

I got scared, broke my lease a month early and quit my job of five years that gave me nothing back.

He told me, "take care of yourself and your family, I won't keep you here, do what you need to do."

So I did.

April-June:

A very eventful few months.

My mom offered for me to live at her place, but for some reason she was acting like I would live there forever. That this wasn't a temporary arrangement, and that I didn't have an apartment set up already.

This was in large part to my sister, who had lived with my mom taking advantage of her for years.

Even though my sister and I were going to move in together, I was just never sure about it cause of how she never packed her stuff or made any effort to find a job.

My mom often acted like I was lazy and not searching and was treating me like... Well, an unruly teenager instead of a woman of 29 years. She acted like I was a failure for returning home when it was her idea in the first place.

I would have just been petrified in the city.

Like usual, I retreated to my au again.... And in the spring, something eventful happened.

In may, 8th 2020:

I was invited by @rissynicole to join an invader zim discord.

Now, I've never really used discord before. I always thought it's interface is too confusing.. and I'm a member of a few other iz discords and I usually don't follow them that closely.

Rissy assured me it was different cause some friends of thiers made it and it was smaller.

Before I knew it, I was sharing memes and getting to know everyone there.

It wasn't long after I invited my partner in IZ crimes, @paketdimensioncomic who was genuinely wary of iz servers due to a bad experience with the last one they were a part of.

But soon they were sharing memes and laughing with everyone else.

My eyes were starting to open and I was able to connect to fans of my work in an interpersonal way. And I was able to discover new artists and aus I never knew about.

I was also able to meet so many others of the community and invite them to the server myself.

The moo-ping 10 server kept me sane while I was living with my judgmental mother.

Not only that, the summer was very productive for my au.

Drawing was all I did, and it was a huge break from the job as a cashier I had.

Not only that, June came, and with it, me and Ceph's first collab fic:

A result of us just going back and forth in our DMs constantly about Professor Membrane and how he changed in ETF for the better and how much we adamantly stan "trying-to-be-a-good-dad-brane" and how much of his ETF development has to be implied off screen in order for the emotional resolution in the movie to matter.

The only reason I never professed my love for Membrane as a character in the fandom before the fic dropped was.... Well....

Membrane can be a decisive character in the fandom and I was so worried people would hate me if I did an analysis on him, simply because he's not the best parent in the world. (As an understatement)

Ceph and I really encouraged each other to scream our love for the science himbo loud and proud more frequently and so often.... I actually start to see less Membrane hate posts and breakdowns then their used to be.... I like to think it's a combination of Me and Ceph's influence, along with ETF and the Quarterly's painting Membrane in a slightly more nuanced light then he was previously.

I never wrote a collab fic before and it's such a rewarding and fun and unique experience that I don't think I'll ever have again. And I love working with Ceph on our fics so much.

So much so we did it again...

July-August:

I never thought I would be one of those people who writes NSFW IZ fic... But here I am.

The Brainbrane au started.... An au of my au where Membrane and the Computer fall in love and Membrane makes him a body.

This ship was based around the idea where we joked that Membrane and Zim's Computer would have funny interactions if they ever met, under the pretense Membrane thinks Computer is Zim's parent.

Our headcanons morphed and shifted until we just full blown started shipping them.

Just because Membrane and Zim's Computer have overall REALLY entertaining chemistry.

It's a character dynamic never seen in the show or comics (yet) and I imagine thier interactions to be nothing but entertaining banter.

The fic was also born from spite... Making fun of the troupes and cliches that we found personally destestible in some questionable zadr fics.

So an angry ace and a demi-bisexual collab on a porn and end up blessing the fandom with

Compapa headcanons,

Computer being recognized as a more common used fanon character,

The ship of Brainbrane.

The fandom having a crisis of "oh God, not only are we xenophiles we're technophiles too!!!" Or "why you gotta give Zim's Computer an ass"

More android Computer designs

It was an eventful summer.

In the midst of all this, I moved into my new place, got a new job, and I was able to see my friend (who is def my platonic straight soul mate) who lives in Indiana.

She came to visit, showed me how to decorate and how to take care of my body better! Things were looking up! It was great.

September-November:

My job was at a boat store. If was approaching the fall and my hours were being severely cut.

I was getting into a rut of depression again.

I thought things were changing but the same routine I was trying to escape from was the same thing coming back.

But instead of letting it take hold, I decided I was going to do something about it... I was gonna visit a museum and go with my sister. Just... variety stimulation.

Well that didn't happen.

I talked about this shortly in my au itself...but..

My sister had a complete mental breakdown.

She stopped taking her meds, went off the deep end and was in the hospital a total of five times throughout November.

A lot of it was acting out and the perfect storm of environmental factors that made her scream and act out so she would keep going back to the hospital.

It was traumatizing for me.

I just can't explain what it's like. For her and for me to be in that position.

I'm not telling the full story and a lot of bullshit things happened I won't share here.

She got diagnosed with bipolar one and my mom expected me to be a caretaker for her.

I threatened to disown my family and move away out of state.

It was just too much for me to handle.

So much I was a nervous wreck.

I tried to pick up a second job... Cause my sister was in the mental ward so frequently and couldn't pay the bills.

But I was fired within a week cause I was so stressed I couldn't retain the basic information they were training me for.

It was an office job.

My dream.

It could have been.

I was fired from something I really wanted.

I was only there for three days.

I could not retain any information.

I was a mess.

My sister was a trigger, my mom wanted me to live with her. I couldn't live like this.... I had to get out.

I had to get out.

December:

Remember my Indiana friend?

Well the first week of December is my birthday.

My 30th to be exact.

While I did pick up a seasonal position at Target (not my first pick)

I took the first week of December off so I could spend time with her. Cause she agreed, I needed a break from this crap.

Surviving 30 years is cause to celebrate and if I had to celebrate with my sister I would have cried.

I know there was a risk traveling out of state during a pandemic...

But I needed out, I needed a friend..

And I kinda wanted to look at the place since I was considering moving there.

My friend's mom was sick so she avoided me and her daughter and got us a hotel room.

It was fun! I got to swim in a salt water pool, we talked about Naruto, I showed her the iz and su art books I brought, also Computer and Membrane tea.

I also got to meet her other friends and get crunk. And her bf who is super nice and funny!

I had a super fun birthday....

Until her mom told my friend that her grandparents had covid and that was what she had. And my friend got sick within that same day.... As did I.

I owe so much to her family.

I was an entire state away...about a ten hour drive from home.... She let me stay at her house. "The covid house" we called it.

Cause everyone (except the father. He avoided everyone and booked a hotel immediately cus he was an ER doctor) had covid within a day.

I called in, the test results were positive and I had to stay with her family for ten days quarantine before I could work again.

Which would have been fine....

If my tumblr didn't log me out perminately of my old account. @dana-chan325 .... Which really sucked cause I had a constant headache and was too sick to engage with tumblr or much of the fandom. I didn't want to make a new account when my head was in a bad fog and I could barely breathe or smell.

It's not like I saw much of my friend either.... We all slept at different hours and she had more symptoms then I did.

It was just netflix, danganronpa v3 and cry.

I was miserable, but at the same time.... Not?

I really feel like God himself was the one who pulled me off from tumblr, and my living situation.

Maybe a whole extra week feeling like a bobblehead was what I needed.

It gave me some much needed clarity on my relationships with my mom and sis and friend.

Running away to Indiana was not the solution here.

Once I was better within ten days and no longer had a leave of absence, I drove home.

I am glad I fully recovered (but from how I understand it, my dear friend is still ill. I'm praying for her)

I might have gone to work a bit too soon, cause I had an asthma attack after trying to unload a single cart in the span of six hours.

My boss lectured that my speed was unacceptable, and even though I explained the covid situation and breathing problems many times, she threatened that I'd be fired if I'm that slow again.

Que the next few days of work where they put me on register.

Instantly I was sent into a panic remembering the last time I was on the register and how that panic attack caused me to quit.

I even asked if I could go back to stocking, since my breathing had improved. My boss assured me that I was put on the register cause they needed help and nothing to do with my covid thing.

Then as December concluded and the new year began, my boss said that this was the last shift for me cause my position was seasonal and they were letting a lot of people go.

I then asked why I was on the schedule for Sunday, and he told me to ignore it and I'm free to reapply for full-time.

I mean.... They can act smart about it...

But putting your general merchandise stocker onto register after she had an asthma attack and missed working the first two weeks of December due to covid.....

Not a good look.

So once again, I'm jobless once more.

Will probably continue to live with my sister for awhile.

But I do not feel as if it's a bad thing....

I met so many good people this year....

My friend's family even gave me 500 usd to cover my rent since I couldn't work for a majority of December.

I've seen evil and good from humanity this year. I've seen acts of god, good friends and what my real family means to me as well as friends I consider family.

This year really made me look back at the person in the mirror and say,

"I deserve better."

And actually worked for it this time.

Oh and after Christmas I got a horrible yeast infection that burns over most of my body currently.

Very accurate doodle to the pain I'm in right now.

(seriously my body is a fungus.)

But hey, good news, I respected myself enough to go to the doctor about it!!

So that's progress.

I really hope 2021 holds good things for me.

Thank you to the mooping 10 server for always being there and keeping me sane,

Thank you tumblr for liking my au and everything.

AND A SUPER SPECIAL THANK YOU TO @evartandadam and her family for housing me and my dumb diseased ass. Everyone, she is an angel and I can't express how much she means to me. Please check out her art and buy her stuff on redbubble.

Anyways... Byebye 2020.

I look forward to what I can accomplish for myself this year.

[yourusualfangirlstuff]

Just a little something to share. Hi, I'm YouFa

I've always liked to write, either fanfiction or just stories in general... And I wanted to try something, it's been a while since I've been on Tumblr. So, here we go:

This little angst/fluff one-shot is called: "Off wherever you want to go" ft. you and your comfort character.

"Oh well, this is the last box." You said with a tint of sadness in your voice. You were almost away from home, moving out since a small job request, had been handed to you weeks ago.

Your job involved doing what you loved the most, it just wasn't a chance you could let go. Yet, as much as you wanted to stay hyped up, you couldn't much.

You just missed them. A lot.

The last time you knew about them, you gave them the news about moving away, they seemed relaxed about it, but after that, they were gone. And hadn't heard about them, for a while now.

Deep down, it upset you, but it couldn't distract you from what your main goal was: Getting on the top. Being the #1.

The van you had hired for the moving, was already full with your stuff and the kind old man —the driver—, was just as happy as you.

"Ready to go, young one?" he asked in his raspy voice. You were looking at the end of your street, still expecting for them to show up and stopping you from going. You sighed, looked at the wrinkled one, nodding.

You got in the passenger side and him, behind the wheel, strapping on his seat belt. Your family was waving at you, and you couldn't help, but tear it a little.

The vehicle started, and off you were, to the greatest adventure of your life... Alone... It made you sigh through your nostrils, slouching on the seat.

"What is in your mind, young lad?" he asked. You turned to them, with your eyebrows raised and looking to the front once again.

"Oh, well, it's nothing, sir. Just... Remembering things." you replied and smiled sadly at them.

He chuckled and shook his head. "It's for someone, isn't it?"

Your cheeks flared up and you looked away.

"Nah. Someone? No, sir. At all" you tried to lie, but he patted your shoulder.

"Love gets us all, sometimes. It did with me, and my loved one" he replied. He searched quickly in his pocket and pulled out an infantile-sized picture of him and his partner, handing it to you.

"It's adorable. I like it" you said and held the picture between your index and thumb.

Suddenly, the man passed over a street bump, making you drop the tiny photo.

"Oh shoot. Sorry" you said and since you didn't have your seat belt, you simply bent over to pick it up.

You ran your fingers through the van's rug, to look for the man's little photo and with no warning, the vehicle stopped, making you crash your forehead against the dashboard.

You groaned in pain and rubbed your head, turning rather confused at him.

"I am terribly sorry! It's just that this wacko stepped in the middle of the road!" he angrily yelled, and peeked his head outside the window.

He honked several times and you turned your head to the weirdo... You knew that weirdo. It was your weirdo.

They were standing there, with a very worried look, as if they were about to cry.

You got off the car and walked towards them, pissed off.

"What in the heck are you doing!? We almost ran over you!" you frowned at them. The action, made your head twirl and hurt. You just pressed your hand against your forehead, still trying to rub away the pain.

"Are you alright? What happened?" they asked, very worried. Their hands were approaching your face when you moved them off, in a swift movement.

"Don't. Please, don't" you coldly said and they were taken aback since you'd never treated them like that.

"Where were you?" you asked. They opened up their mouth and closed it up, again.

"Look, I know I was away for a while-" "A while!? Just a while?!" you cut them off. They gulped at this, they'd never seen you this angry.

"You were gone long enough to make me miss you and even cry for you! You were just... Gone! No calls, no messages, nothing!" you expressed it all, your hands doing motions.

Their lips thinned up and they were thinking their words carefully, still not saying anything.

"Well?" you crossed your arms over your chest, your brow still furrowed.

"I... I'm thinking" they replied and you scoffed, turning away, and walking back to the transportation.

"Wait wait-!" they said and you turned back to them, with a raised eyebrow.

"I just... Don't know what to tell you" they mumbled.

"How about the truth? Why were you gone so long? Where were you?" you asked and they sighed in defeat.

"I was gone, because... Aside from getting upset about seeing you go, I also pulled some string around... So I could be with you." they explained.

"I... Don't get it. What do you mean?" you tilted your head.

"I want to be with you. Here or anywhere... But just us. You and I." they approached you and grabbed your hands, squeezing them.

Your face was puzzled in confusion. They chuckled and pulled you closer.

"I think we can be together... If you want to, in the same space," they mumbled and pressed their forehead against yours.

"Of course I want to. It'd be wonderful" you whispered back and looked at them in the eyes.

"Then, let's do it. Let's stay here, and have a new life" and with that said, your face dropped and you walked back.

"Wait... Here? At hometown?" you asked and they nodded.

"... I can't," you said and their face dropped as well.

"Why not?" they asked and you bit your lip.

"I got my dream job. Waiting for me, across the state. I'd have told you earlier but..." you shrugged.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I... I'm so sorry." they replied and you just approached them, patting their shoulder.

"I don't understand your reasons, but... Whatever it was, I'm glad I saw you, one last time." you smiled and walked away, once again.

You got in the passenger seat again, and the man looked at both of you, with a sad expression.

They were struggling with either stopping you or letting you go. They ran to your side's window and tapped on it, startling you a little. You rolled it down and rested on the edge with your elbows.

"Where are you going to be, then?" they asked, gripping one of your hands. You squeezed it back and kissed it.

"Remember that pretty place I always talked you about? The house I've always wanted to have? I got it. And, you're very welcome, if you ever want to pass by" you smiled at them and they gave you a sad smile.

You wished you could take them with you, but you knew what they had to do and what you had to do. Each of you, on your own business.

They wanted to stay at hometown and you wanted to explore the around, more... Nothing wrong with that, but sure felt a little bit alone.

And off you were...

Three months later

It had been a while after your moving and you were doing just fine in your new workplace. A couple of friends were made but you couldn't help but think about them... Smile, laugh, eyes... Just everything.

You did talk through the phone or messages, sending eachother memes and ressuring messages, but it just wasn't the same.

You were almost out of work and you were very tired. It had been a long day but it was all worth it, for the payment.

You recieved a text message from them.

"Hey, are you almost out?" you smiled at your phone

"Yeah, I'm crossing outside righ now." you texted as you walked out the building.

And you froze when you looked up at your phone. They were right there. You blinked a couple of times and approached slowly.

"What...? How?" you stuttered out and they hugged you tightly. You hugged them back and inhaled slowly, exhaling and getting their scent in your nostrils.

"I moved here, as well, right up the street. Now we can lunch and be together, more often. You keep doing your job and I keep doing mine" they said and pulled away from the hug.

You caressed their face with both of your hands and they kissed them, each. They squeezed their hands against yours and it made you laugh a little, couple of happy tears streaming down.

"Are you hungry? I'm starving." they said and you nodded in agreement.

"Where at?" you asked.

"Off wherever you want to be at. With you, it's great." they replied and you grabbed one of their hands, locking your fingers together, and looked where to get some lunch.

[one-abuse-survivor]

hi, it's the milky way again

it's been a while since i've dropped something in your mailbox

i've now finished the school year and the grades and reports are coming in tomorrow or the day after. i'm kinda scared of them because i know they dropped a lot since last year but i'm pretty sure i passed most if not all of my courses so i think it'll be fine.

i started working a summer job a week ago and i'll be working the next week too. it's mostly because i need the money so i can replace my broken phone but also because we had to do some kind of job/workplace experience thing because of our school (that was voluntary though because of covid). the job pays really well so i might also get a new binder with the money since the one i have now is falling apart. on the other hand, working 8 hours a day for five days straight has really taken all of my energy and i can't listen to music while working which makes it a lot harder. the last week i've mostly been coming home in the evening, maybe eating something and going straight to bed.

(also i got my period last thursday and i hate hate hate it so much it makes everything so much worse even without the dysphoria it's just so messy and annoying to deal with)

a week ago i finally jumped over my shadow and talked to my mom but it was a huge disappointment. i'm pretty sure i couldn't get my point across in a way she'd understand and she kinda just admitted not being able to help after saying a bunch of things that really hurt. i removed myself from the situation by "going to bed" aka going to my room, locking my door and crying myself to sleep. i was just really pissed off and talking to her was kinda my last resort for when i realized i couldn't help myself anymore.

anyway, the day after that was monday (when i started working) and me, running on barely any sleep because the night before was a disaster, had to somehow survive work and i'm pretty sure i ignored or snapped at a lot of people that day which i feel kinda bad for.

on wednesday after work i talked to my mom again because i was pissed off and couldn't let it sit. she said the same kind of bs she had used on sunday and we got nowhere, since then i've probably been a lot less friendly to her but i'm just not ready to give up so much energy for her.

her favorite arguments we're things like "but others have it a lot worse" (which is a mindset i've worked on getting away from for quite a while) (also my mom was referring only to my grades with this but little does she know that the only reason why my grades aren't dropping that badly is because no matter how bad i got mentally, i yeeted stuff like self-care before school because school had always been structured and mostly clear while life in general was just. not.)

other arguments she used were "just get off your phone and set a timer for 45 minutes and concentrate on what you wanna get done" and "just pull yourself together, it's not that hard" (those were about me saying that i struggle with starting tasks and getting shit done)

lastly she also said that my expectations are just way too high and that if i didn't expect only the best from myself (this was about grades too) i wouldn't get so disappointed if i didn't get that great grade i was hoping for. and like, she's not wrong but if you've only ever been good at one thing in your entire life and you were really good at it, then you'd just expect nothing but the best from yourself because you know reaching that isn't impossible.

and she ended it with "what do you expect me to do?" and "i can't help you" and i realized later that i just should've said that she should help me get someone that *can* help me, like a therapist or something.

anyway, i'm proud of myself for finding a summer job and finally talking to my mom and not so proud of my grades and the fact that i can't seem to get the point across to my mom

thank you for creating this safe space for people like us, i wish you a happier time than the one i'm having :')

milky way here :|

got the reports and grades and stuff yesterday and i'm just :| about it. like, yea i know i'm still somewhere at the top of the class and that i'm more than one and a half grades better than some others in my class but i'm still upset about my grade in maths for example but my parents laughed/chuckled at me when i was upset and that really hurt

and afterwards my mom said something along the lines of "yes you're allowed to be stressed but because of your good grades you don't have the right to complain about being stressed" which is absolute bs and i still don't understand how having good grades disqualifies one from complaining and i'm sure as hell not gonna ask her

i just wanna scream in her face but i'm pretty sure she'd slap me if i did that

i'm almost done with my summer job and since monday noon i had the chance to work in a different part of the factory which is a lot less uncomfy to be in because it has AC and since it's not in the lab itself, i don't have to wear a hair net, an overall, steel-toed boots and rubber gloves.

today i set myself a few goals for the summer break and for the next school year and i really hope i can get through with those because it'd make future-me extremely happy

have a great great time :D

and PS: since tumblr has been eating a lot of notifs lately i missed a lot of your posts and i tried filtering by the milky way anon tag but only one post showed up. i'm not sure what's up with that tho

Hi again! Don’t worry, I got you. Here’s a link to all the asks you’ve sent up to this point: first, second, third. All of them are tagged, but the tumblr search engine isn’t exactly known for its accuracy. I use the tumblr original post finder site for this stuff, but I just realised by looking for your asks that the site takes capital letters into account, so the ones that were tagged with a capital M in Milky weren’t showing. They all do show now that I changed the M to lowercase. So I’ll have to try to be more consistent with that from now on 😅

On to your asks. First off, congrats on finishing your course! And I really hope you can replace your phone and your binder :D sorry about getting your period, though, that really sucks :(

I think the conversation with your mom that Sunday is the one discussed on the third ask I linked. I'm really sorry the same thing happened on Wednesday. It's not your fault you can't get across to her—she's the one who should be open to helping you and offering possible (actual) solutions to the problems you're bringing up to her, and not you who should spell out every single thing she can do to help you. You're not being unclear to her—she's being obtuse and refusing to listen.

You're not meant to know how to just "pull yourself together", and you're absolutely right that your grades not dropping all the way doesn't mean you're not struggling, and you still deserve help so you don't have to jeopardise your mental health for your grades. And while she's right you don't deserve to be so hard on yourself or to expect perfection from yourself, that's also something that you deserve professional help with. Again, you're not meant to know how to just turn off those emotions and thought processes.

*hugs* sorry your math grade wasn't as high as you'd hoped. It's okay to be upset and disappointed by that, and I'm so sorry they laughed at you. You do have every right to express your emotions, and you're not being unfair to anyone else for being unhappy with your own grades. I often feel the same! I get really good grades (as I think I've already said), and I also often feel disappointed when a grade isn't as high as I'd hoped. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way. I'm really glad you know what your mom says is bs, because it really is. It's no wonder you feel like screaming in her face—she sounds incredibly frustrating, exhausting and invalidating to deal with. You deserve so much better than this 😔

I'm so glad you're proud of yourself! I'm really proud of you too for everything you've accomplished despite her being so unhelpful and invalidating, and I really hope you're enjoying the rest of your summer holidays and you can reach your goals! And if the occasion arises and you do end up using the "you can help me find someone who can help me" line, I hope it goes better. But if not, again, please know this is an issue of her refusing to listen, and not of you being unclear about what you need.

Sending a huge virtual hug ❤️