#I'm willing to beg

[lightlistenerwindwatcher]

Mashima Taichi is such a good character. He's the stereotypical guy who has everything, except he doesn't have the one thing he really wants. Or maybe two things. He makes success look easy, but it's because of all of the hard work he puts in when no one is looking. He's a coward because he has to be perfect.

I just rewatched episode 7 where we get our first look into his mind while playing karuta, and it always gives me chills. Then, when he opens up about his struggles to Tsutomu and gets embarrassed you feel that. This is the guy who is always putting up a front. Always being perfect. And here he admits how hard he struggles, and how much it hurts to lose, and how that makes winning so much more powerful.

[oregoncoastfox]

Just the two best lancers I own hanging out and having a great time bonding over being ancient, often-hated and almost always misunderstood beings who just want normal lives. Just a relaxing girls' day at the beach doing what anyone would enjoy.

Art by the eternally delightful @wishem

[fiona-fififi]

"I'm not your last. I'm your first." "Hey, they-they can be the same thing." "But they usually aren't."

Have we talked about this yet? Have we talked about the acknowledgment that actually, yes, your first can also be your last? That even though that's not Buck's journey, it very well could be someone's.

Because there's a part of me that recognizes it just as an acknowledgment that relationships are different and complex.

But also maybe a little bit of me is actually hoping that they might be hinting that this could be Eddie's journey.

[phoenixcatch7]

Reading loz/lu fics and it's just so interesting how wide the spectrum is of their personalities.

Sometimes it's got an in universe reason (different past (usually gender or species change), recent or ongoing traumatic events, a spectacularly bad first meeting), but sometimes (often) the characters are just... Weirdly angsty or peppy, there's no in between!

And I'm beginning to think less people have played more than one game than I thought XD.

Not that it's anyone's fault! One game is more than enough to be part of it all, and loz is exclusive to Nintendo consoles - and all the older stuff is frustratingly hard to get hold of. Heck, I'm still looking for wind waker, and that was really popular! And then you have to play it! They're not small games!!

But could people writing wild please ease off just a tiiiiiny bit so he can be a semi functional member of society pretty please XD? He's just as much a polite boy as any other member of the chain! He won't even run in shops! He can't attack npcs! He talks to every single person he's ever seen and remembers every single name. Yes, he's three quarters woodland creature with a hefty amount of trauma but he's also a fashionista who managed to avoid accidentally taking sides in a mayoral election and that's not easy!

[ikram1909]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGe8p3Lxk/ we wont have this duo till march 2025💔💔💔

The way Rodri ADORES him like he's always playing around with him 😭😭😭 the idea that I won't see Gavi with either him or Laporte for a long time makes me feel sick this is so unfair 🫤

[kinetic-chaos]

ce que j'ai fair ce soir-là

ce qu'elle a dit ce soir-là

réalisant mon espoir

je me lance vers la gloire

Psycho Killer - Talking Heads

[pekoeboo]

ugh. some thoughts.

really been trying to find the joy in drawing/writing again and honestly it's been such a challenge. friends have told me it's most likely depression that's making it hard to feel motivated and tbh they're probably right.

hoping to get back into being creative in the way I Want to be at some point tho. I miss it. there's still so much with my stories and characters that I haven't been able to share or explain and I wish I knew how without it feeling like this daunting, impossible task.

I don't know when I'll get around to actually sharing art again (or writing, if ever). was hoping that I'd manage to get some of my mental and physical issues in check recently for just long enough to get back into the swing of being creative, but that hasn't seemed to work. everything feels bad, both artistically and physically. I'm struggling to keep up with the frantic pace at which my brain comes up with story concepts and intriguing character interactions, even tho everything in me wishes I could turn it into tangible artistic expression so I can get it out of my head and share it. it used to be easy. I don't know why it's not now.

I'm just . tired, I guess.

[wildsaltair]

hi everyone, I am delighted to present to you the worst quality photos I have ever found of Maximus Decimus Meridius. I'm so unreasonably happy to have found these

[dreamlogic]

...

[xovera-toz]

Seeing the internet romanticize reading is hilarious. But also sad.

Reading, as it is for me, is not café houses and neatly organized books. It's not the scent of tea in the morning and not an aesthetically pleasing picture that looks cool in a post.

Reading is totally forgetting where I am. Reading is not even taking note of my sorroundings. Reading is the funny faces I make while I imagine the characters, reading is laughing out loud in public spaces, reading is ugly crying after a story ends.

Reading happens in your head. Stop trying to materialize it.

[allgremlinart]

I'm so sorry but everyone complaining that the moment in the Nightwing comic where Dick hugs Bruce and says he loves him is too fanfic-y as if this isn't what everyone has been screaming at dc for for like the last 5 years.,, ur going to confuse the poor bastards...

like personally I dont think Dick would ever call Bruce dad ((some of the other kids maybe)) and yeah it was a little fanfic-y but I'm gonna take him telling Bruce he loves him and hugging him as a win 💀 I'd take this over what we COULD have gotten (overly edgy bullshit for like the 17th fucking time)) literally every day of the week I'm sorry

[autumn-applepie]

University ever pushes you so low you have to go buy a couple of beers? /srs/neg

I'm gonna vent in the tags for a moment humor me for once /gen

[damianosismyking]

So you have an au about damen being abusive with laurent ?????

Please let me know more?? Any hcs or thoughts or anything pls

The capri fandom needs some dark aus fr

~🦌🌺

hello my darling!

I've been gone so long that I have no idea when you sent this and I'm deeply sorry for that!

I came up with the idea for an AU in which Damen's abusive way back in 2019/2020 (2021?) and to say I was a different person altogether back then is an understatement. I also haven't re-read the books in a long while so I can't say I recall everything I had imagined for this fic to begin with BUT!, I've got some fuzzy thoughts stored in the back of my mind that may satisfy some of the crave for Dark Damianos (a concept deeply slept on in my honest opinion but with how much people like to hate on him for free, it's best if we keep it sleeping lol).

DISCLAIMER: in my very private opinion, Damen has a natural darkness to his character that I find appealing (or would be appealing if I wasn't a coward) to explore. Those are the lenses through which I approach the abusive patterns he could come to develop in a relationship with an already emotionally/psychologically vulnerable Laurent. And also in my very private opinion, Laurent is a vulnerable character (for all reasons we as a fandom dwelled on to the point of exhaustion, but, most of all, in relation to how he sees and thinks of Damen — in terms not only of admiration but almost adoration, just as he did with his brother).

We all rememeber the scene at the end (?) of PG when Laurent is stepping on Damen's toes by saying bad things regarding his family and how Damen loses his temper and hits Laurent hard enough to draw blood. The guards step in to arrest Damen for hurting the prince and Damen takes full blame for doing it without showing a single bit of remorse whatsoever. Laurent is the one to talk his guards down from arresting Damen by pinning the blame of being assaulted on himself and that is it.

This idea (of an AU that never came to be) was forged mostly on the side of Damen's character that has a tendency to jump believe he is always right in the assessments he makes and proceed to never question the truth behind his own reasoning. And on the side of Laurent's character that always blames himself for every bad thing that has ever happened to him despite his own helplessness, and nurtures an unhealthy need for a role model to hold on to — once his brother, now his lover.

I'm going to leave all my thoughts for this AU bellow the cut, in case some people may find the matter too upsetting to read about. Trigger warnings for domestic, physical and psychological abuse, obviously! Proceed at your own accord and don't come whinning later🫰

so putting two and two together:

Damen is prone to angry outbursts or just violence in general. We see in more than one occasion that it doesn't take much for his 'bad side' to come out, which is a characteristic a lot of aggressors in this very patriarcal society we live in also showcase. And as their universe is ALSO incredibly patriarcal, this would check out.

As aforementioned, one of the most significative intances of Damen's violence is the day (after he had already slept with Laurent, after he admitted to himself he was in love with Laurent) where he he baits into Laurent's provocations and hits him.

Laurent's edge, I personally believe, though attenuated as it may be by the end of the cicle of abuse he endured all the way from his late childhood throughout his adolescence, will continue to be in place. It was wired into him as a survival mechanisms and old habits die hard. Whenever he is overwhelmed or any of his emotions slip from his iron-cast grip, he will likely spit fire and try and hurt whoever is within his reach.

Honeymoon phase being over, let's say the kingdoms were in fact merged (not going to get into any of that). Let's say Damen is the king of Vere as much as Laurent is the king of Akielos. Let's say their troups, their guards, palace servants — they are all unbiased and answer to both Laurent and Damen as their true kings equally.

Let's say Damen and Laurent continue to get at each other's throats. Lets's say they still got plenty to disagree upon and that their personalities continue to make them butt heads. Let's say their grudges, though they have agreed to leave the past be in the past, hold and come up again. An underlying resentment inate to their love. There's a lot of tension that I can see surrounding L/D's relationship. If you don't believe that it's fine, if you don't see it, that's more than okay. But I'm asking you to bear with me here.

They are having a heated argument in their palace about something that wasn't (shouldn't be) personal, but all of a sudden is. Damen says something that offsets a chain reaction in Laurent and he becomes a boy in selfdefense mode resorting to the good old habit of pushing Damen's weak spots just for the pleasure of making him angry and miserable. Damen has had a long day, he is weary, he is fed-up with all the kyroi, all the councelors making demands and telling him how to do his job. Laurent says the wrong thing at the wrong time and a moment later he is on the floor, with his hand on his cheek touching the burning spot where Damen slapped him. He bit his tongue in the impact and he can feel the blood in his mouth which he swallows.

There are no guards that come in this time, because they know better than to step into their king's quarrels. Damen tells himself it was Laurent who pushed him too far, he didn't mean to do it. Laurent agrees — Damen would never have done that if Laurent himself hadn't asked for it. Damen was good. He's only ever been good. He doesn't do anything without a good reason. Laurent is the one who fucks things up and pushes people too far. They make up.

Next time isn't that different. Nerves were high for a thousand different reasons. Laurent maybe got up from the wrong side of the bed. They argue. Damen pisses him off so he goes on to piss him off in return — just to give him a taste of what that feels like. In the back of his mind he remembers what happened last time they argued but he brushes it off as a mistake. Damen wouldn't dare to make the same mistake twice.

Then Damen does. And just like the other time Laurent loses his footing from the strength of the blow. His eyes tear from the pain but they don't fall. Damen is fumming over him, telling him how Laurent pushes him over the edge. Damen, who is such a just, charming, fair king. A much better king than Laurent is, with his head in place at all times in a way Laurent's own never is. If he lost his temper, it was because he was forced into it.

Laurent is the one who went too far again; Damen simply reacted to it. He stands and tells Damen he was wrong for saying the things he said. He shouldn't have. Damen agrees; Laurent shouldn't have. They make up.

Every time Damen is forced to loose his temper with Laurent he get angrier with Laurent and becomes a little wilder. Laurent should not make him keep doing it! He doesn't mean to do it! When the anger subdues, after they make love, in the morning after, Damen shows Laurent the tokens of the love he still has for him — a new mare of an excellent breed for Laurent's private stables, a new imported book he would like for his personal library, a new delicacy their cooks learns to make as sweet as a human can handle just the way Laurent likes it.

Damen is a good lover. Most of the time. If only Laurent stopped bringing out his bad side.

Laurent understands how every time Damen hits him it's his own fault. He tries to stop himself from causing their arguments but he can't. He always ends up saying the wrong thing, he always disappoints Damen somehow and though he can keep his stance straight and his face void, deep down he's terrified he will eventually drive Damen away.

After the loss of his entire family, after the death of Auguste, of living so many years under the sadistic regime of his uncle, Damen is everything Laurent has. And Laurent, warped as he is by nature, tainted and wrong and bad at his very core, doesn't deserve him. He knows he doesn't deserve Damen, who is so honorable, so good a leader, so righteous and mighty. But he wants Damen and he wants him to stay. He wants to be good for him and for Damen to think he is good.

So when the slapping evolves into punching, Laurent searches his own words, his own actions for where the fault lies. And always he finds it. The exact word he said in a meeting with their kiroi and councelors that undermined Damen's authority. The exact moment he stopped to speak with an ill-intentioned courtier who flirted with him and he must have unintentionally flirted back. The provokation implied in a comment he thought was innocuous. And the fact Damen only found more and more of reasons to be dissatisfied with Laurent, despite him becoming evermore self-aware and trying so hard, so much of the time, to please Damen, meant nothing more than the fact that Laurent was a man full of flaws. It wasn't on Damen.

They both agree Damen's assessment and his morals could never be wrong. He is too good and honest a man for that. Laurent is causing all of it.

The oldest members of their guards notice the slow, steady shift. Those that used to compose the old Veretian prince's guard are worried. They whisper among themselves when they see a new bruise blooming in their king's fair skin or hear the shouts coming from inside the royal chambers. But no one dares to raise a voice against king Damianos. Jord or Lazar (or whichever of the prince's guards you like best) goes to Laurent to raise their concerns and ask if everything is all right between him and Exalted. If there is anything Laurent needs. Anything at all. They will stand by him come what will. But Laurent berates them and tells them to keep their noses out of royal business.

Damen is approached by Nikandros and inquired about it when one day Damen unintentionally leaves Laurent with a black eye. Damen finds that is the perfect opportunity to lament about all the ways Laurent has been driving him insane and making him miserable. That he is getting worse with time where Damen had hoped he would have settled and his temperament improved. That years after the events they lived through, he keeps holding Damen accountable for things that should be left in the past. That Damen doesn't blame Laurent for killing Kastor, or torturing him in Vere anymore, so why should Laurent still resent him for Auguste.

Nikandros understands. He feels sorry for Damen, that Laurent makes his life so difficult. He has witnessed their quarrels before, had seen the way Laurent evokes Auguste's name as a dagger to dig into Damen's heart.

Then it becomes common knowledge all around their court: Laurent is as unbearable and hard to reconcile with as he'd ever been, prideful and resentful and cruel. And Damen is the poor man who has to handle him atop a whole kingdom he has to rule. There is no soul in their kingdom that doesn't feel bad for Damen's situation.

What no one seems to notice is that Laurent has taken to flinch whenever Damen lifts his hand. That he tenses when he raises his voice. That he is much more succint and careful with his words whenever Damen is around, because he doesn't want to upset him.

All they notice is Laurent's worsening moods. His renewed bouts of broodiness and anger. That he takes anything and everything out on everyone — the servants, the guards, officials, nobles of the court, the walls and the furniture. Nothing seems to please him anymore. Everything sets off his rage. Which is something else Damen has taken to punish him for, in the privacy of their chambers.

Laurent never cries. Not when Damen tell him how difficult he is, how impossible he makes to love him. Not when he sees the several shades of new and healing bruises all over his body, not when he gulps mouthfuls of his own blood. Laurent hasn't cried since he was thirteen. But he gets more and more hopeless each day that passes and he is proven again no good man could ever truly love him because nothing good and pure remains so in his presence.

Laurent always brings out the worse in people, no matter how he tries to get things right.

But he keeps on trying. Because maybe one day he can. And maybe Damen will see there is good left in him to love even though he makes his life hard and harder every day. And maybe one day Damen will love him easily.

Because all he really wants is to be worth it of Damen's love.

And that's all Damen wants too. He already loves Laurent so much. He would never, ever hurt him again if only Laurent would stop provoking him into it.

[anonyanonymouse]

I need a minute. to process the update

[linseymiller]

niche minor character headcanon no one asked for

ok but wait because i had been avoiding the mtg cards and datamined stuff but the zevlor info...(spoilers under cut) (and in the tags honestly)

Putting aside how unfinished a lot of the quests feel when they are completed in Act 3, Zevlor's feels complete but changed. There's no dialogue about him having been enthralled or his thoughts on it. It's always been odd to me that his enthrallment and subsequent breaking away from the Absolute is never mentioned because sure, we have tadpoles in our heads, so it makes sense that we require the Emperor/Orpheus to not succumb, but the Absolute is still an elder brain. And he just throws the enthrallment off? His status as a Hellrider and paladin sort of makes that make sense, but the concept of him actually betraying everyone. That would have been delicious storytelling. Also, his MTG card creates more questions than answers.

He was removed from what should have been an until-death position of esteem for something not his fault after living through literal hell, and now he's responsible for a bunch of civilians of varying skills and moods who are equally as traumatized as he is. He lost his faith in the gods when Elturel fell and became an oathbreaker not for breaking his oaths but for simply not believing anymore. He wants to retire once they all reach Baldur's Gate safely.

But at some point after leaving the grove and before being attacked in the Shadow Lands, he's abducted. He lets his guard down for one moment, and the Absolute slips into his mind as easily as he used to slip into his Hellrider armor. Except something else is already in there.

Zevlor made a deal in the Hells with something older and (hopefully) far more powerful than devils and demons, and it saves him in that moment. It's too late, though. The tieflings are dead or running, and he's captured.

And to me, there's only one deal a character who once was in the service of a guardian god who is specifically fond of children and who is very worried about the child survivors he's leading would take - the lives of the adult survivors for the children's lives.

Which would hit even harder if he had been a teacher and not a Hellrider (I would assume that was changed far earlier than anything else, though).

[reneesbooks]

Damn I really feel you on that one Stephanie Meyer book with the parasitic aliens, like that premise was so interesting, why did she have to focus on the stupid love triangle?!

ok here’s the thing. i could fix her

edit: i'm putting this post under a cut bc it got SO LONG lmao. read at your own risk it's messy and obsessive and a bit unhinged

the movie got so close in some ways and fucking missed in so many others. on the one hand, ian in the movie was imo a lot more likeable than he was in the book. I’m attributing this to less dialogue written directly by stephanie meyer and the actor's face. on the other hand. jared was awful. movie did not fix him even a bit. only thing they fixed was the age gap but not even that was explicitly addressed in the movie. it was just assumed bc the actors looked similarly aged

I should mention at this point that I haven’t actually read the book in a few years but I read it so many times at age 13-14 that it was an intensely formative experience despite being a generally terrible book. I could still probably quote entire passages from memory. I’ve seen the movie definitely more than 50 times, including in theaters w my mom the week it came out. I watched it last week just for something to play in the background while I crocheted. I can and will 1000% quote along with the movie. fucking brain parasite book got me I guess

the book delves so deeply into the genuinely fascinating world building that tbh has influenced me to this day in terms of depth and creativity. that’s where the movie set itself up to fail bc the ONLY redeeming quality of the book was the world building. its perfect for a tv show so that there is time to explore what it’s like for Melanie to live among the souls instead of focusing exclusively on wanderers time among the humans.

ok the love triangle. here's the thing. it didn't have to be Like That. BUT. i remember my edition when i was younger (that has since disappeared but i have a new one on the way bc i miss my stupid parasite book) had a bonus chapter or smth from melanie's perspective after she wakes up without wanderer in her head for the first time and runs into ian and they both have this moment where they reach for each other and there is that moment of horror on ian's part when he realizes that she is not wanda and melanie being so used to wanda reaching for him that she doesn't realize that her body is doing it automatically. and it was just so interesting to think about how that duality affected them and i think the movie kind of tried to do that with the conversation that ian and wanda have on the cliffs but it just didn't make it happen in the right way. so like. having the love stories there are important for why wanda is even willing to learn to be human but the focus on them in the movie and its general failure to properly execute the most interesting parts of them are what kneecapped it imo.

anyway getting back to why despite that the love triangle is literally the least interesting part of this book. starting with the thing that drives me the most up the wall. the fact that the movie didn't include walt at all and glossed over wes's death makes me chew drywall bc that plotline made me SOB. wanda's time sitting at walt's bedside and comforting him through his illness is one of the things that really teaches her about the gentleness of humanity despite their perceived cruelty, and what makes much of the humans actually start to trust her. they see how she treats walt and realize that she has a huge heart and capacity for kindness. so when jared gets mad bc the seeker looking for her has caused problems, and she has the whole compound backing her up anyway, it actually has some weight to it. the movie flattened wanda and her relationships to the others so much it's so disappointing!! she feels grief in a way that's different from how she's ever experienced it before, despite knowing and understanding grief from her previous lives. she is devastated and forever changed by walt's death, and similarly by wes's. i don't remember exactly if he had a partner in the book but i think he did so wanda also had that experience of seeing his death devastate someone else so completely (and for her to be able to connect that to how jared feels about her being in melanie's body). so when she asks doc to let her die at the end, it's go so much more significance because she specifically asks to be buried WITH walt and wes!! she finds peace with death and understands it and wants to be with the people who taught her about grief and love and that just. i'm so unhinged about it. and it wasn't in the movie. chewing drywall.

this isn't like. a big thing. but it's forever a little disappointing to me that it wasn't in the movie either. bc the movie went a more "ethereal being made of light" direction for what the souls' actual bodies look like instead of the book's "segmented body with thin tendrils that attach to the brain of the host" description. this matters to me for a sad reason and a funny one. the sad reason is because when wanda sees the souls that the humans tried to cut out, she notes based on the vestigial feelers of one of the dead souls that it was a baby. horrible and sad detail that makes that scene 100 times worse. the funny reason is because since the humans know what the souls look like for the above sad reason, they refer to them as worms. which essentially leads to them calling ian a worm fucker and that's hilarious on a lot of levels the least of which being that it's true. like while melanie and jared and jamie go looking for a new body for wanda he literally doesn't care what it looks like and just sits holding her containment tank the entire time. worm fucker and proud of it good for him

i could write a whole other essay on the worldbuilding but i don't have my copy yet (and all the library copies are checked out who ARE y'all who else has read this book???) and i can't remember enough of it to really get into it. but wanderer's job was to be a teacher because she'd been to almost all the different planets (hence her name) so there were some glimpses of the fascinating universe of this world. the stories that she tells about the other planets?? unparalleled. wanderer tells this story about an ethical dilemma (among parasitic aliens lmao) because their host species on one planet burns another alive for its food source BUT they had recently discovered that the food source species was also sapient and intelligent so they were trying to figure out a way to handle the situation. that entire thing could be more interesting than the love triangle but instead it was like. a maximum of two pages about that planet and a one-off appearance from another soul that used to live there at the very end of the book. wanda tells the people at the compound about the underwater planet, and the one with the giant blind flying creatures that they call the Bats, and she mourns using the ritual from that species after the whole seeing the corpses incident. all of this gone completely to waste and for what!! for what stephanie!!!

another funny thing that i think might be better left in the book--when they take the seeker out in the book the human that was in there in the first place is so nasty and awful that everyone is lowkey mad at wanda for not just letting them kill her. top tier comedy ngl

ugh i also remember a scene where wanda is going on the long supply trips and sees a couple of souls with a human child who isn't occupied and is like. huh. that could be really indicative of a beautiful direction for humanity to go. could souls and humans live in peace in a real way? and then it's never really addressed again bc sexy feelings about two men oohhhh

so. is she fixable?

yes. i could fix her. a tv adaptation is what she needs. bc then there's actually time to delve into the thoughts and feelings of melanie and wanderer (and you could do that really well if you made a visualization of their shared mindspace--the book talks about how they put up walls against each other, and how they can block each other out or grab at control) as well as the worldbuilding and ethical questions. i have a whole three-season plan for fixing her so buckle up.

season one starts with wanderer waking up in melanie's body and the first half explores their time as a uni professor and the seeker's insistence on trying to find the human resistance through melanie's memories. this is where we really get a chance to see wanda's perspective--not because she's right, but because it's interesting. she is a huge pacifist and is horrified by violence, whereas melanie is used to using violence to get what she needs and tends to jump directly to it as a solution. so before they run off to the desert, when the seeker is still constantly checking up on her, as wanda gets more annoyed, melanie keeps suggesting that they kill her, and wanda has a harder and harder time holding her back. finally at the midpoint, wanda snaps and attacks the seeker, not because melanie made her do it, but because she's finally reaching that point in her journey towards humanity. and of course everybody blames it on melanie and they have to run because they're going to be separated.

then the second half of the season starts with the wandering through the desert. btw. book jeb my beloved. unhinged grandpa didn't get to be nearly as unhinged in the movie. the second half of the season is wanda acclimating to the human environment. i am of the opinion that romance should not happen until the second season at LEAST. obv melanie is pining for jared and wanda is dealing w that but it's not a romance. she doesn't love jared she's just comforting her dramatic roommate. maybe ian is starting to show interest in wanda but she hasn't noticed yet because she's still getting used to being human. season one ends with walt's death, since that's one of wanda's biggest turning points.

so season two opens with wanda understanding humanity a little better. and now she notices that ian likes her. melanie rightfully puts up a fuss about this (because it's her fucking body, steph meyer why did you almost make a convincing bodily autonomy argument and then fall short you almost had it--) and we can have that drama still while setting it up against the backdrop of wanda's journey to understanding humanity and ultimately becoming human herself. this is the first half of the season, and then there is the turning point--discovering that they've been trying to cut out the souls even as she lives among them. this is her major fracture with ian and is when she realizes that she can actually push melanie out of her head entirely and has to scramble to get her back. season midpoint cliffhanger is melanie being gone. and that finally brings jared around about her when he sees how hard she works to get melanie back and help jamie. so the second half of the season starts with healing jamie and how jared being ok with her changes the dynamic. now she's going out on raids, seeing how humanity and souls can live together, starting to come around to being in love with ian maybe, and generally settling into a comfortable existence. and this is when the seeker comes back into the picture at the end of season two, killing wes and being captured by the humans.

and season three. where it all comes together. the seeker represents the biggest obstacle to humanity and souls living in harmony--she is a mirror and a foil to wanda and melanie, two people too stubborn to let the other take over, unable to coexist. when she's captured by the humans, they want to kill her and her host, forcing wanda to come face-to-face with what she hasn't wanted to admit--she has to tell the humans how to remove a soul from a body. and in doing so she has to admit that she's been selfish and cruel by not telling them before. because by now they've more than proven that they can accept her kind under the right circumstances. so she's able to lay that out with the seeker and the first half of the season shows them starting to do it--to take souls out of humans and send them to different planets. the book does so many interesting things with this, showing how some people come back right away, some come back very slowly, some don't come back at all. there's a lot of material to work with (looking at you jodi and kyle and sunny) but eventually we get to the midpoint which is wanda asking doc to remove her and bury her with wes and walt. and then he does.

so the second half of the third season begins with melanie alone. and for the first time ever we don't hear from wanda at all. because she's in a cryotank and unable to have thoughts. so now we have what didn't get a chance to be really explored by the book--the aftermath of wanda's removal and the ethical debate of violating her wishes to put her in another body as well as the fact that when they do put her in one, it's one of the people who never woke up. it starts to get fuzzy here bc there's less original material to work with (and what is there is...not great the body they find for wanda is a 17 year old and ian is like 27 throwing up) and because there are so many directions to go after the book ends-- they find other human groups like they do in the book that also have a soul like her living among them, they try to work with the soul government to reach an agreement for peace, etc etc etc--and they're all so interesting! but the book ends because the love triangle has been resolved and it just doesn't address any of that. shaking steph by the shoulders and screaming

anyway the point of all of this is that this book and movie have been living rent free in my head for over a decade and i would simply like to make the good version of it that lives in my head real.

tldr i could fix her. steph meyer wya.