#I'm serious REALLY bad French

[bo-bo-bean]

Rest and Recreation (Warnings; Minor Swearing and Bad French)

Flippy could barely stand the hot sun anymore. It hung in the sky, taunting down with waves of heat so unbearable, the green bear could only dream of tearing off his skin to at least have an ounce of cooling air. His damp fur riddled with sweat and muck helped much less.

He looked up at Sneaky and then down at Mouse Kaboom, his close friends he made in these times of tough memories and hardships to overcome. They seem unfazed by the heat, only marching forward. He watched their feet and matched his own to the best of the rhythm, hoping the distraction would make the trip saner for him. Suddenly, his sergeant stopped in place and put up an open hand.

Almost immediately, his army stopped in place. Flippy wasn’t able to cease his movements in time and bumped into the back of Sneaky. The chameleon looked down at the sheepish bear who smiled an apology.

Silence reigned, the sound of the soft wind far off and animals calling out for various reasons becoming the new definition of stillness. Not a peep from any mouths…

“Rest and relax,” the sergeant huffed, looking back at the sweat-covered group behind him. They all breathed a sigh of relief. Everyone dropped their heavy bags to the ground with resounding thuds.

“Sargent, sir.”

“Speak,” he allowed permission to one private.

“There’s still day.”

“There is no point in continuing when you’re all about to die from heat stroke. There’s no one around from what I can see and hear, so we’ll set up camp and continue tomorrow. Wash up, drink your water, and stay alert.”

Everyone collectively agreed, Flippy sitting on a nearby log. It was as dry as a bone, with no moisture inside to trap. All insects who called it home moved away thanks to the upcoming heat.

“Flippy,” Sneaky called to the bear. His eyes looked up, not seeing the reptile until a long tongue pulled at his ankle. With a quiet yelp, he was pulled to the ground and onto the hard, caked dirt.

“Gwuaaah…! Sneaky!” he snorted, following the tongue up the tree. “How did you get up there so fast?”

“I’m Sneaky,” he winked, sliding down the trunk and resting beside Flippy, pulling him up. After he was back on the log, he pulled out his canteen and offered it. “Here, drink up.”

“O-Oh I got my own,” he declined, waving a paw.

“Yeah but it’s in your bag and I’m sure it’s under everything, knowing you.” He then made his voice a little higher to match Flippy’s, mocking him. “ ‘Nah nah, I’ll put my water on the bottom. We’ll run into creeks and weapons come first. Besides, what if the weapons go off while I’m carrying them? I don’t need water, I just need focus. I will feed on focus.’ “

“Okay okay!” Flippy pushed his friend lightly, blushing.

“Always the serious one,” he finished his act. “Besides, you’re so red, I could mistake you for a Christmas tree.”

“Shit, I am?” The bear put a paw to his forehead, feeling how hot it was.

“Yeah, so drink,” he offered once more. He made it more tempting by shaking the canteen, the water sloshing inside. Unable to resist the temptation anymore, Flippy took the canteen and gingerly opened the cap before spilling the contents inside his mouth. He sloshed it around his tongue and teeth before swallowing and going in for another gulp. He underestimated how thirsty he was. “Better?” Sneaky asked, taking the canteen. He took some water and cupped his hand, making a bowl for the water to be held before patting it on Flippy’s head. Although it felt childish, Flippy had to admit it felt wonderful against his baked fur.

“Yeah…” he sighed out in bliss, leaning on the log, thankful for Sneaky not having fur, and also jealous.

“Et donc la guerre a déclenché la romance une fois de plus…~” another voice entered the conversation in a taunting tone.

“I may not understand French but I understood that shit,” Sneaky smirked. Mouse KaBoom tittered back, causing Flippy to blush and stand straight up.

“We weren’t doing anything!”

“Bien sûûûûûr…~”

“It’s true!”

The French mouse laughed at the antics, taking the seat on the other side of Flippy, getting comfortable, and flopping his bag off. He then looked at Flippy and gained a small concern. “You’re very red.”

“He’s sunburnt,” Sneaky explained.

“Obviously,” KaBoom snickered. Flippy could only groan lightly, which caused the two to laugh.

“I’ll go get stuff for a fire, we can search for water and boil some,” Sneaky offered.

“I’ll find some water,” Flippy announced, standing up to start his journey.

“Here, take this with ya,” Sneaky offered his canteen again. “I’ll just steal yours as a truce.”

“Deal,” the bear sniggered. Kaboom was already gathering rocks to start a pit and getting out his fuse, searching for tinder.

Flippy went through some skyscraper-sized trees and bundles of greenery, already wilting from the heat. When he came across a creek, he couldn’t help but feel giddy. Crocheting a pouch from leaves and vines, he dipped it in before splashing his face, neck, ears, and head with the cool, refreshing creek water. After getting relatively damp, he trekked back to the campsite as the sun was starting to tuck itself in behind some hills. Pleased with the warm air able to disperse soon, he quickened his pace.

The moon was high in the sky, and every soldier was around a campfire or already sleeping while their partners took shifts. The air was cool and the winds helped make it colder, so they were no longer panting or gulping water from the creek that Flippy helpfully shared the location to.

Sneaky looked at Mouse KaBoom, who was using his bag as a bed and a tattered blanket being more stitches than fabric over his small body.

“I’m a little jealous his bag is big enough to have it as a bed with him,” he admitted.

“Well it also helps that he’s small,” Flippy added in. A rock was chucked at his head, making him gasp and look over at the sleeping mouse getting comfortable again. “Jeheherk!”

“Ne m'appelle pas petit, espèce d'ours aux haricots verts…” he muttered under breath. The two green friends laughed as Sneaky took the boiling water off of the fire. He first filled the canteens and then got out two worn cups, filling one and offering it to Flippy. He gratefully took it and held it in his paws to warm up, looking at the sky.

“You have anything waiting for you back home?” Sneaky suddenly asked. Flippy looked down back to his friend, taken back by the question, then shrugged.

“I suppose my parents,” he told, clutching to his dog tags on instinct. “I don’t have a girl or guy or kids. I don’t know if I want them.”

“Naah you have to! A looker like you? You have to get all the women.”

“I don’t!” he laughed. “Where would you get that assumption?”

“You purr in your sleep,” Sneaky cheekily answered. This caused a blush on Flippy’s cheeks and ears, inciting the reptile to continue. “You always do, every night. It’s… honestly calming to listen to when I need rest.”

The flustered bear fiddled with his cup until a realization hit him.

“Is that why you insist on me sleeping first!? Not because ‘You’re a good fighter, we need you rested?’ “

Sneaky only laughed in response, so Flippy took that as a yes. “You’re such a shithead…”

“I’m the only one you know,” he calmed down with a shrug and a smile.

Flippy huffed and wanted to splash his drink on him but one; it was still hot and two; it would be a waste of water. So he decided to fight back with the same ammo.

“What about you, then? You have someone waiting for you?”

“Mm, a fiance,” he sighed with a smile. “He was very adamant about me not going to the war, scared I wouldn’t come back.” But the smile slowly faltered to a sad look and heavy sigh. “... I wanna see him again.”

“You will,” Flippy assured him with a simper. “You’ll be back in his arms and teasing him, rubbing water on him.”

“Jack ass,” Sneaky chortled. They both were silent for a few more minutes before Sneaky suddenly started the conversation again. “Want to hear a joke?”

“A joke, huh?” Flippy raised an eyebrow. “Run out of things to say?”

“You wanna hear it or not?”

“Yeah, I do,” he nodded, getting comfy and sipping his lukewarm water. “Lay it on me.”

“Alright, so,” he started. “Bill was on the side of the road, hitch-hiking on a very dark night and in the midst of a fierce rain storm. The night was rolling on with no end in sight. The storm was so strong, he could hardly see a few meters in front of him.” He stopped to take a sip of his water and continued. “Suddenly, through the swirling rain, Bill saw a car slowly coming towards him. And as it drew level with him, it stopped.”

“Is this a ghost story or a joke?” Flippy asked.

“A joke, I promise,” Sneaky giggled. “Anyway, desperate for shelter, and without really thinking about what he was doing, Bill got into the back seat of the car and closed the door. That was when he realized there was nobody behind the wheel and the engine wasn’t even on!”

Getting invested, Flippy leaned his elbows on his knees and pressed his lips against the cup every so often. The rain of the ‘joke’ made him more thirsty. “Mysteriously and soundlessly, the car started moving slowly forward. Bill looked at the road and saw a curve approaching. Now he was getting scared and he began to fear for his life. But just before he reached the curve, a ghostly hand appeared through the window of the car and turned the steering wheel. Bill, paralyzed with terror, watched how the hand appeared every time they came to a curve.”

“How would he know about the curve if it’s raining so hard?” the green bear questioned.

“Flips, it’s a joke,” Sneaky chuckled.

“Is it? Cause it’s sounding like a ghost story. A cheap one at that.”

“Well let me finish, goof!” the chameleon flicked at his forehead, making Flippy swat his hand away lightly.

“Alright alright, continue.”

“So! When he saw the lights of a pub down the road, Bill gathered all of his bravery and strength, jumped out of the car, and booked it towards the pub. Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and asked for two shots of scotch. Shaking and half crying, he began telling everybody about the horrible experience he had just been through. A silence enveloped everyone when they realized he was not drunk but was telling the truth. About ten minutes later, two guys walked into the same pub. They were also wet and out of breath. Looking around and seeing Bill sobbing at the bar, one said to the other, “Hey Bruce… that’s the idiot who got into the car while we were pushing it.” ”

A snort escaped mid-drink from Flippy and water suddenly erupted out of his nose and onto the licking flames. Sneaky, looking at the scene, burst out into uncontrollable laughter as the poor bear agonized from the sensation of it all, holding his dripping nose and mouth.

“Fuhuhahahack my nose!” he laughed. Sneaky was still too far into howling to even see if he was okay.

Mouse KaBoom only groaned and shoved a pillow onto his sensitive wrapped ears, huffing out and feeling so tempted to use his supply of dynamite. After the two calmed down, Sneaky finally helped Flippy up, who was still cackling not from the joke, but from what just transpired. It was ridiculous moments like these that made anyone belly laugh for hours compared to the constant bloodshed and bullets flying in the air. Flippy could only hope he would have moments like these with his two best friends when the war was over.

[fluentisonus]

napoleon movie was not good tbh

[sewerfight]

when I was around twelve I used to sit at the family computer and send hatemail to a white french dude named Jacques who was a self proclaimed communist on Tumblr. This was back in the day when you didn't need a blog to send anon hate. I had no real beef with him but I just didn't like his tone. used to send him "SHUT UP Jacques" periodically. and he'd answer every single one of my asks like "who is this?? show your face or I'll fucking kill you" and I'd be like "now now, that doesn't make sense, jacques" all haughty and he'd get so fucking mad at me. One time he posted a selfie and I sent him an ask claiming I was a psychologist and that his hair parting suggested that he wasn't a communist at all. and he took it deliriously serious and went off on a 2,000 word rant. I can remember going to stay at my grandparents over that weekend, so I didn't even respond to the rant until I came back. I could've chosen to end it there, but when I returned, I sent him another ask which was like "psychologist here again: if you were a communist your hair parting would be in the middle. evenly distributed. All behavioural signs point to someone who doesn't take their own values seriously." and he went ballistic. really swearing at me. all caps type beat. he never turned the asks off, btw. which always made me wonder if he didn't know how to, or if he didn't want to cause he was convinced he was fighting a war, and this action would ensure he lost it. anyway this went on for weeks until one day I completely forgot about him like he was some kind of childhood imaginary friend I'd conjured up in my loneliness. but yesterday I happened to recall the whole scenario, because my buddy was like "remember when you were twelve and I came over to your house, and you showed me on the computer how you'd been terrorizing this random French guy for days on end. And you were laughing like fucking crazy. and I said it wasn't funny because he probably had problems, and you were like 'oh.' and you looked a bit guilty for a second, but then you went and got a grapefruit from the kitchen and threw it out of the second story window at my kid brother, who was playing in the street, and then you started laughing again?" Well. when she put it like that, needless to say I felt bad. so Jacques if you're out there I'm sorry I was such a little shit. you had totally normal hair, and you only wanted people to share stuff. If it's any consolation I know every day of my life that I'm probably going to hell for the sick things I have done

[tinycoffeeroom]

treat you better | carlos sainz

face claim: none ♡

request: here !

requested: Could I request a Carlos smau where another driver breaks your heart and he’s there to pick up the pieces and make you whole again? Please and thank you ❤️

cw: cheating, bad guy charles, mentions of unwell family members, cursing

a/n: charles and alex i love u guys i promise this is just for the au <3

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November

👤 charles_leclerc liked by fan, fan, and 78,283 others

f1gossip Trouble in paradise for Charles and Y/N? Charles Leclerc was spotted on a long walk on one of Monaco's more secluded islands with a mysterious brunette and his and Y/N's dog, Leo, this weekend. Sources say the pair were often looking to see if there were cameras around, the two of them giggling as they held hands and played with the puppy. Y/N L/N, Charles girlfriend of 2 years, is currently said to be on a trip home to see family, we wonder if the two have broken up or if Charles is back to his old ways?

fan f1gossip tagging charles is so shady i love it

fan when i catch you charles

fan no bc remember when a fan said they met y/n in her hometown and she was visiting her gran bc she's not doing too good? charles u fuckin suck bro ↳ fan wtf really???? oh i hope his tyres stick to the road next race ↳ fan kmag you know what you need to do ↳ fan we put our hopes and prayers in the paddock terror 🙏🙏

fan ok but the girls gorgeous ↳ fan THAT'S YOUR TAKEAWAY FROM THIS? ↳ fan im just saying damn

fan this is not what i meant when i said i wanted silly season to get more interesting

fan *looks around* wow i'm so surprised... not like charles has a bad rep with women or anything

fan i hope y/ns ok... my heart is hurting for her ↳ fan the paddock adore her, charles has got a big storm coming next week

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liked by kellypiquet, carmenmmundt and 25 others

y/npriv my gran is doing so much better (nothing can keep the old girl down), my hometown is still as gorgeous as always and my sister got me a cake :)

kellypiquet my girl :((( i'm so happy your grans ok 🤍 ↳ y/npriv thank u kelly bear 🤍 ↳ kellypiquet did i have to physically hold max back from going after he who shall not be named?? yes... did i consider letting go?? very much so ↳ y/npriv 😭😭 hes not voldemort babe 😭 you should have just let him go ↳ kellypiquet now is that really how you feel? ↳ y/npriv ... no but i wish i did ↳ maxverstappen1 she has to go to sleep at some point, then i shall be free ↳ y/npriv thats so ominous you strange creature (i appreciate you)

carmenmmundt me and george have been keeping your gran in our prayers angel 🩷 ↳ y/npriv i love you carm 🩷 ↳ georgerussell63 and me? ↳ y/npriv i tolerate you :)

flavy.barla esteban nearly joined max ↳ y/npriv love him dearly but este's about as intimidating as a teddy bear ↳ estebanocon ?? hey??? ↳ y/npriv sorry king xo there's a reason your nicknames estie bestie ↳ estebanocon let it DIEEEEE ↳ y/npriv never 🫶

schecoperez I am glad your gran is ok, y/n. Let me or Carola know if you need anything x ↳ y/npriv thank you checo :( give the little ones and carola a big hug from me x ♥️ schecoperez

lilyzneimer he shall d word at my hands ↳ y/npriv i fuckin love you lily

lewishamilton he will never know peace next year. ↳ lewishamilton i am however happy to hear your gran is well x ↳ y/npriv lewis 😭 thank you x

francisca.c.gomes pierre has been shouting at Him on the phone for like an hour... ↳ y/npriv 😭 ... what are they saying ↳ francisca.c.gomes a lot of french and things i don't want delicate eyes (yuki) to read... ↳ y/npriv pierre i appreciate you ↳ pierregasly i'm gonna kill him ↳ y/npriv ok maybe tone it down frenchie

lilymhe alex is setting his zoo on him ↳ y/npriv that's how you know it's serious wow ↳ alex_albon tinky's gonna boot him in the head

sebastianvettel i am very glad to hear your gran is ok, y/n, sending her and you all my love x ↳ y/npriv thank you seb :( miss you x ↳ sebastianvettel come and see us soon! the kids miss you x ↳ y/npriv you got it! x

danielricciardo he's a cunt ↳ danielricciardo and i don't mean that in a nice aussie way ↳ y/npriv DANIEL ↳ oscarpiastri no he's right, in the nasty aussie way, he's a cunt ↳ y/npriv oscar i did not raise you to talk like this ↳ oscarpiastri we are literally like 4 years apart in age... ↳ y/npriv kicking a girl when she's down WOW oscar ↳ oscarpiastri ... i am sorry mother dearest ↳ y/npriv that's better

carlossainz55 hermosa, he may be il predestinato but to me he is carne morta (dead meat) ↳ y/npriv carlos 😭 ↳ carlossainz55 also i'm glad to know your gran is well, send her my love ↳ y/npriv she already fancies you enough as it is ↳ carlossainz55 my plan is working :) ↳ y/npriv what plan? are you seducing my family members??? hiding my mum as we speak ↳ carlossainz55 something like that ;)

yukitsunoda0511 happy to see your gran is ok! and i am sorry about the other thing :((((( ↳ y/npriv yuki my angel you have nothing to be sorry about

kevinmagnussen i know what i have to do ↳ y/npriv kevin NO you're like 2 points away from a race ban!! ↳ kevinmagnussen worth it :) ↳ y/npriv nicohulkenburg pls talk some sense into your teammate ↳ nicohulkenburg unfortunately y/n i too will be joining kevin in his "defense" ↳ y/npriv haas i am so sorry

landonorris i may have done a thing... ↳ y/npriv i am terrified... ↳ landonorris i'll text you :)

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📍Monaco

👤 landonorris, carlossainz55, francisca.c.gomes, kellypiquet, lilymhe, lilynzeimer, flavy.barla, carmenmmundt liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 87,902 others

y/nstagram angel baby, dumb and dumber and my girls 🩷

Comments on this post have been limited

carlossainz55 ... am i dumb or dumber ↳ y/nstagram do you really want to know? 🤨 ↳ carlossainz55 for my own sanity im saying i'm dumb ↳ landonorris why am i dumber????? ↳ carlossainz55 do you really want to know? 🤨

carmenmmundt don't forget about lunch today xx ↳ y/nstagram been looking forward to it since i boarded the plane 🫶

landonorris you're welcome for the lift and the room btw 🙄 ↳ y/nstagram my saviour xx ↳ landonorris and for stealing leo for you ↳ y/nstagram I NEVER ASKED YOU TO STEAL HIM???? 😭 ↳ landonorris well i did because i'm an amazing friend and am willing to sacrifice all my bloody furniture ↳ y/nstagram you leave the baby alone, he was probably stressed :(

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FEBRUARY

(estrellita - little star) (uy, quécarechimba - ugh, that dickhead)

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📍Shanghai

👤 carlossainz55, landonorris liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 89,028 others

y/nstagram did y'all think i would miss the first race week?? ft dumber and roomie x

fan mother has returned!!!!! ♥️ y/nstagram

fan if looks could kill, carlos would be six feet under ... charles was FUMING ↳ fan given the way his girly hid when y/n appeared i would say he has no right to be mad at all ↳ fan if the girl i cheated on rocked up to my teammates garage whilst i was with my side piece i quite frankly would walk onto the track midrace ↳ fan how do we know charles cheated? they've not said anything ↳ fan exactly. if they had been broken up surely they would have put out some sort of announcement to clear things up ????

scuderiaferrari always good to see you in red, y/n ❤️ ↳ y/nstagram FORZA FERRARI SEMPRE!!!!!! 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎

carlossainz55 i hate this new nickname ↳ y/nstagram what else should i call you? ↳ carlossainz55 yours ↳ fan CARLOS I SAW THAT????????

landonorris i have been demoted from bestie to roomie... this is the thanks i get... ↳ y/nstagram thanks roomie xx btw bins go out on tuesday :)

lewishamilton now you're free of your ferrari obligations, you should come across to mercedes next time ;) ↳ mercedesamgf1 we would love to see you over here y/n! ↳ mclaren um no us next?? ↳ alpinef1team no us!!! ↳ redbullracing come to the winning team :) ↳ scuderiaferrari y/n will always be a ferrari girl, back OFF 🤺🤺🤺 ♥️ carlossainz55

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charles_leclerc added y/nstagram added to their story to their story

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liked by maxverstappen1, carlossainz55 and 20 others

y/npriv that bitchass man... idk how he thought he was gonna spin that story but not on my watch

oscarpiastri did you really have to use my meme though? ↳ y/npriv yes it was funny and otherwise i was gonna call him a cheating lying bastard on main so 🤷🏻‍♀️ ↳ oscarpiastri understandable, please continue

danielricciardo lando was laughing so hard i think he bust a rib ↳ landonorris it still hurts to breathe but holy shit y/n i love u ↳ y/npriv love u too stink :) also don't forget to pick up leo's food from the shops ↳ landonorris you do know you can text me this stuff? ↳ y/npriv yeah but reminding everyone we're roomies is funny to me

maxverstappen1 walked past ferrari hospitality and fred was PISSED ↳ y/npriv 👀👀 carlossainz55 can you confirm? ↳ carlossainz55 oh, absolutely... i was worried he was going to have a heart attack or something

francisca.c.gomes ok but did he not even think to talk to you first before posting that? it's literally been months ↳ y/npriv apparently not 🙃 texted him about it and suddenly he was sorry ↳ francisca.c.gomes men 🙄 ↳ pierregasly ???? ↳ francisca.c.gomes i stand by what i said ↳ y/npriv yeah is there a problem gasly? ↳ pierregasly no problem at all ma'am, as you were

scuderiaferrari we had no knowledge charles was going to post that. we love you y/n ↳ danielricciardo FERRARI? why are you on y/ns priv? ↳ y/npriv me and the social media intern are besties xx

carlossainz55 estrellita, lets go for dinner, you deserve it ↳ y/npriv 👀 are you paying? ↳ carlossainz55 of course, i am a gentleman ↳ y/npriv pick me up in an hour :)

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liked by fan, fan and 40,718 others

f1gossip Carlos Sainz and Y/N L/N were spotted at dinner last night. The two enjoyed a meal before taking a stroll along the Monaco pier front where, as pictured, the pair were in high spirits. We're happy to see Y/N looking so happy following the revelation that her ex-boyfriend, and Carlos' current F1 teammate, had cheated on her. The two were then joined by Y/N's current roommate and F1 driver, Lando Norris, who then whisked them off to a local nightclub. We continue to send Y/N our support and hope to see more of her happy side.

fan i don't think i've ever seen y/n laugh like that, we love to see it

fan this coupled with the photos of charles and his girly arguing in the paddock 🤭🤭 we know who won the breakup

fan why do i kinda think carlos and y/n would be cute together ↳ fan woah, she's only been broken up with charles for a few months and under really shitty circumstances, she needs time to heal ↳ fan ofc ofc!!! i just mean when she's over ch*rles, the two would make a really good couple

fan happy y/n and happy carlos, my two favourite things ❤️

fan y/ncarlos fans we rise!!! ↳ fan he would treat her so right ↳ fan the entire time she dated That Man, carlos has always been so nice to her, i wonder if he secretly fancied her all along 👀 ↳ fan or maybe he's just a good guy ↳ fan that too 🤷🏻‍♀️

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APRIL

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📍 Australia

liked by y/nstagram, landonorris and 890,274 others

carlossainz55 swipe across to see me and oomf Another Carlando podium! We know what you guys wanna see and we love to deliver! The car drove like a dream today, shame we couldn't get more points but it's always nice to celebrate a great race with some champagne showers!

See 98,072 other comments

fan WHO TAUGHT CARLOS WHAT OOMF WAS??? ↳ fan either lando or y/n 100% 😭

fan CARLANDO PODIUM!!!!!!!!! WE DREAM OF DAYS LIKE THIS

y/nstagram FORZA FERRARI SEMPRE !!! 🐎🐎🐎🐎 congrats winner 🥳 ↳ carlossainz55 i think i was right when i said you would be my good luck charm 😉 ♥️ y/nstagram ↳ fan oh they're so sick for this ↳ fan y/ncarlos'ers we're so winning

charles_leclerc congrats ↳ fan ik for a fact he was forced to comment

landonorris carlando are back baby!! ↳ landonorris also cant believe im either oomf or roomie... ↳ y/nstagram stop leaving your smelly socks in the bathroom and maybe i'll change the nickname ↳ landonorris oh that was mean

fan "shame we couldn't get more points" carlos you shady shady man

fan who else cheered when kmag pulled through and took * out of the race

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liked by carlossainz55, francisca.c.gomes and 21 others

y/npriv oh we eating good tonight

kellypiquet i'm sure we are 👀 ↳ y/npriv KELLY???

landonorris carlos is so sexy ↳ y/npriv real ↳ landonorris back off my man??? ↳ carlossainz55 i'm gonna hold your hand when i say this lando... ↳ landonorris WOOOOOOW.... i see how it is carlos

carlossainz55 gorgeous as always ↳ y/npriv you can't even see my face in that photo carlos 🤣 ↳ carlossainz55 don't need to see you to know you're gorgeous ↳ maxverstappen1 i hate to say it but that was smooth ↳ danielricciardo they don't call him the smooth operator for no reason

scuderiaferrari power (soon to be (fingers crossed)) couple ↳ carlossainz55 😉 ↳ y/npriv not from the main acc damn

francisca.c.gomes need you biblically ↳ y/npriv come here then babe xx ↳ flavy.barla lemme join ↳ y/npriv i got two hands babygirl ↳ oscarpiastri estebanocon pierregasly you gonna let her snatch both your girls? ↳ estebanocon unfortunately there was a clause when they agreed to date us and it was that y/n is wifey, we are simply the Others ↳ pierregasly ^^

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liked by carlossainz55, lilymhe and 25 others

y/npriv decided to put him out of his misery :)

carlossainz55 and who is that sexy man? ↳ y/npriv idk but he keeps speaking spanish to me even though he knows i dont understand it 🙄 ↳ carlossainz55 but do you like it? 👀 ↳ y/npriv i think you know i do x

francisca.c.gomes AND YOU DIDNT UPDATE THE GROUPCHAT??????? ↳ lilymhe FR!!!! I LITERALLY SAID TELL US AFTER YOU KISS HIM ↳ y/npriv SHUT UP RN ↳ carlossainz55 no do go on ↳ lilymhe what happens in the y/n gf's gc, stays in the y/n gf's gc

carlossainz55 estás muy guapa, vuelve a la cama cariño ❤️ (you look so pretty, come back to bed sweetheart) ↳ maxverstappen1 we have the translate function on ig you horndog ↳ y/npriv don't be mad i snatched ur man ↳ maxverstappen1 ... he'll never forget the redbull days

landonorris RUE WHEN WAS THIS?????? ↳ y/npriv hiiiii lando... um so.... 🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️ ↳ landonorris GET BACK HERE U RAT EXPLAIN YOURSELF ↳ landonorris carlossainz55 WHAT ARE U DOING WITH MY ROOMIE ???? ↳ carlossainz55 i mean i could tell you but instagram does have guidelines ↳ landonorris ew ew ew that's so gross i dont even wanna know ↳ landonorris happy for you guys or whatever but ew never tell me anything remotely sexual about y/n or i will vom ↳ y/npriv lando wtf???? ↳ landonorris you're like my annoying sister i'd have to remove my skinsuit if carlos opens his fat mouth ↳ carlossainz55 hey? ↳ y/npriv you're so fuckin weird ily

danielricciardo HE SHOOTS, HE SCORES!!!! ↳ carlossainz55 you were right, they don't call me the smooth operator for no reason ↳ y/npriv you were literally giggling and kicking your feet after i kissed you ↳ carlossainz55 y/n :(((( my reputation :((((((

lilyzneimer wait do was taking the photos? ↳ y/npriv ... self timer ↳ lilyzneimer down horrifically bad wow

scuderiaferrari OH Y/NCARLOS'ERS WE WON!!!!! ↳ y/npriv admin 😭 not u too ↳ scuderiaferrari not even sorry i've been WAITING for this one!!!

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liked by francisca.c.gomes, fan and 30,892 others

f1gossip A surprise twist in the Charles and Y/N drama? Following Sainz's back to back victory in Australia and then Silverstone, Y/N and Carlos shared what looks like a loving kiss. Eagle eyed fans then spotted Charles on camera arguing with a Ferrari employee in the garages following the Y/NCarlos moment. Finally, Carlos was spotted outside where he was soon joined by Y/N, the two leaving the circuit hand in hand. It is noted Charles' new beau was nowhere to be seen.

fan Y/NCARLOS'ERS WE SO WON!!!! ♥️ 10,829 others

fan she upgraded wowow

fan charles throwing a hissy fit was so funny i was cackling watching it

fan kika in the likes... what do you know queen? ♥️ francisca.c.gomes

user not her being a homie hopper 🤢 ↳ carlossainz55 can't be a homie hopper if we're not homies :) ↳ fan CARLOS????? ↳ fan oh he ate them up ↳ fan carlos has not been fucking with ch*rles for a WHILE, even before all the drama

fan y/n's face... she looked so happy my heart is so full ❤️

fan queen y/n we trust your judgement

fan ik the entire grid is cheering rn

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📍 England

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 105,018 others

y/nstagram carlando podium again!!! anything else interesting happen at Silverstone? :)

fan the carlando bears 😭 her boyfriend(?) and bestie 😭 ↳ landonorris roomie* ↳ y/nstagram you love me shut up

fan she's so unbothered im giggling

francisca.c.gomes the last slide... ↳ y/nstagram don't worry baby, he was just dropping me off for our date x ↳ carlossainz55 all i am to you is a glorified taxi driver

landonorris couldn't even post a photo of me for my podium... see how it is ↳ y/nstagram don't want your ugly mug messing up my feed ↳ y/nstagram also grey bin needs to go out on tuesday ↳ landonorris you're on bin duty this week? ↳ y/nstagram actually i'm gonna be on a boat in spain soooo ↳ landonorris i hope y'all break up ↳ fan LANDO ? ↳ y/nstagram he's joking dw he did the whole "big brother" speech with carlos, was kinda funny knowing carlos would flatten him in 2 seconds flat ↳ landonorris oh now i really hope y'all break up

fan y/n please we know you have bf carlos pics... i only ask for one thing ↳ y/nstagram i'll post some soon x ↳ fan the most unserious soft/hard launch

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👤 carlossainz55 liked by carlossainz55, lilyzneimer and 98,017 others

y/nstagram my boyfriends so hot, do you guys mind if i chew on him a lil?

carlossainz55 please don't chew me??? ↳ y/nstagram it's internet sla- never mind, ok mr sainz

fan her captions are always so real i love her

fan unhinged y/n is back, we missed you best friend ♥️ y/nstagram

scuderiaferrari HARD LAUNCH HARD LAUNCH HARD LAUNCH LETS GO Y/NCARLOS'ERS!!!! ↳ y/nstagram i love u admin ❤️ ↳ scuderiaferrari our ferrari girl, forever ❤️

landonorris i hate this ↳ fan your ex and your roomie 😔 ↳ landonorris you get it 😔 ↳ carlossainz55 stop calling me your ex 🙄 ↳ landonorris you dare deny the love we shared?

francisca.c.gomes never mind him, can i chew on you a lil? ↳ kellypiquet ^ ↳ lilymhe ^ ↳ lilyzneimer ^ ↳ flavy.barla ^ ↳ carmenmmundt ^ ↳ y/nstagram everyone grab a limb x ↳ carlossainz55 please don't chew my girlfriend

fan thank you for the pic y/n! sorry for interrupting your holiday 🥺 ↳ y/nstagram don't be silly!! it was lovely to meet you <333 dont forget to send me the link to the dress!! ↳ fan on it!! ↳ fan omg how was it meeting them? ↳ fan they're honestly so sweet, they were just holding hands and walking around and carlos was yapping away and the way y/n was looking at him 🥺 they're endgame fr ↳ fan could actually cry?? ↳ fan also when they were on the beach, carlos twirled her around and they started dancing to the music playing from a nearby bar... it was actually like a movie scene 😭😭

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👤 y/nstagram liked by y/nstagram, scuderiaferrari and 505,287 others

carlossainz55 dicen que ver una estrella fugaz da buena suerte, y tenían razón, mi estrellita ❤️ (they say seeing a shooting star is good luck, and they were right, my little star)

See 198,017 other comments

francisca.c.gomes that first picture... i love my girlfriend ↳ carlossainz55 can't even have peace on my own hard launch ↳ francisca.c.gomes you snatched y/n from her girlfriends, you will never know peace.

fan he bagged a baddie wowow

fan the caption??? oh hes in LOVE ♥️ carlossainz55

y/nstagram 🥺 carlos..i'm so grateful to have you in my life ❤️ ↳ carlossainz55 i am the one who's grateful ❤️

scuderiaferrari heyyy y/n *with rizz* ↳ carlossainz55 even my own teams admin wow... ↳ scuderiaferrari not my fault your girlfriends hot

user homie hopper ↳ carlossainz55 eat glass :) ↳ y/nstagram CARLOS ↳ scuderiaferrari we love that you're happy but please carlos this is still your official account

lilymhe y/n i could treat you so much better ↳ carlossainz55 back off i've waited years for this ↳ y/nstagram YEARS??? ↳ carlossainz55... 🏃🏻‍♂️🏃🏻‍♂️🏃🏻‍♂️ ↳ y/nstagram you're literally sat right next to me ... ↳ y/nstagram he just got up and ran away... ↳ fan this is so fucking funny sddjsdhdk ↳ landonorris danielricciardo what was that about him being a smooth operator? ↳ danielricciardo hes also fucking dumb

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a/n: hope everyone enjoys! i am working hard on part 2 of girlfriend of the enemy so we can have some happy charles <3 also 2-3 posts in one week who AM I? (i'm gonna be busy w work so i'm trying to give u guys some food in case i have to disappear)

[pearl-tarotist]

☽˚｡How will your future spouse know you're their special person? ☽˚｡⋆.

As the second PAC of my collection "cliche moments with your fs", this tarot reading tries to describe the moment where your FS knows you are the person they want to spend their life with.

P1-P2-P3

01.

For some of you, your fs will realize you are their special person when they start thinking of you as family. It will happen gradually and naturally, little by little you have conquered a piece of their brain and heart.

A main scenario that appears on the cards is that they will realise you are their person when they keep picturing you as the mother of their children. They suddenly thought of it and they were like "God, Y/N is just…so perfect and good", with adoration in their eyes. They believe you are naturally nurturing and warm. From that day on, they will want to deepen their relationship with you and take care of you even more. It's a serious decision that they make, a realisation and a promise at the same time. It's possible that one day they have forgotten their jacket and you will go and get them for them or that they have hurt themselves with a wall or something and you kiss their hand and tell them it's okay. The fact that you keep taking care of them makes their heart beat faster and makes their chest warm. And at the same it makes them get protective and selfish about you because "no one deserves the attention of someone as pure and good as you". They truly see you as a wish fulfilment. Another scenario I got was a woman laughing at a beach and their partner being absolute smitten by said woman.

Channelled messages:

Russian, english, french, love at first sight, soft kisses, hand holding, red clothes, office work, 20s, office chairs, black and brown hair, Lana del Rey, fairy tales and authors (books).

02.

This scenario starts with a fs that's apathetic, hard working, cold (lacking warm) and that's not interested in love. Do not get me wrong because they are not bad people, it's just that they are a candle that has been extinguished for a long time and now warmness does not come easily to them. With the king of swords, they are lost in their work and their logical sense, they are a soul focused on getting their business at the right position. They see love as something distant and that they cannot have, even when they just have to extent their hand and take that "cup full of love" that's presented to them. I think they do not know how to take those steps as no one has taught them. Kind of making themselves a victim there. But, once you are in their life, you could be a really funny person and a positive presence that brightens their day. One specific scenario is that they could not have laughed in a long time and when they are speaking to you, you make them laugh... and they suddenly realize that they just smile around you and that their checks had been deprived of laugh until you arrived. It's as if their world was black and white until you came along. I'm sure that they did not even realize their romantic feelings for you at the time but they knew that they wanted you in their life, for sure. They will become quite interested in your privat life and always wait to see you. I am sensing an office love in this pile with a grumpy co-worker but it's a general reading so just take this if resonates.

Channelled messages:

Meeting in bright rooms, a place with windows, Excel and numbers, Rome and Italy, vintage clothing, Crimson Peak (movie), The hunger games (book), Azul by Rubén Dario, Studio Ghibli, Romanticism.

03.

The first card that you got was the lovers so they realize you are their person, probably, the first time they see you, and as typical as it sounds, you both are struck by cupid's arrows. (This is prominent for those who have blond hair) They will like your hair and smile, they will randomly think that your hands are soft and a bit cold. They will think about your smile for days on and if you were wearing thigh clothing...well, let's say you have a nice chest. I think you both were introduced by an acquaintance, an old (in thier 40s-50s) man or woman in the street or at your work. However, it's not that easy because your future spouse is extremely nervous around you, it's that new crush energy where they are smitten by you. I think they have trust issues and they had their heart broken in the past and they keep trying to surpass all of those paralizing feeling while meeting and getting to know you better without giving you any signal that they are extremely interested. They will put effort to beat their own fears for a chance to meet you, I think their friends will support them while they get to know you.

Channelled messages:

Romeo and Juliet, yellow, the moon, orchids, Ireland, the police, 10 things I hate about you, the sea, Greece, bulls and butterflies.

[pforestsims]

I'm a fan of traits & trait mods and I really liked Atomtanned's mod /based on Dill's Turn-Ons & Turn-Offs/. This is quite an extensive edit - I just wanted to adjust it a little for my game and once I started I couldn't stop xD

Atomtanned's Trait-Based Chemistry EDIT

& (optional mod) ONLY TO Chemistry

⚡ Download: SFS ⚡BOX

*Archive contains PDF file with detailed list of changes (added / removed stuff) and a few notes.

🟢 Trait-based Chemistry mod edit is available in 7 Languages: English, German, Finnish, Polish, Swedish, Russian, French

❕ New stuff: added Facial Hair TO (replaces Daydreamer), Business Shark TO (was: Serious), Expressive TO (was: Unique). Increased hobby and interest requirements from 5 to 8 pts, Formal wear added to Stylish TO - and more...

I also included an optional mod that switches off Zodiac / Aspiration chemistry and balances out the chemistry bolts gain - so it makes chemistry betwen Sims much less complicated. Obviously it will only be useful for those who like to control every aspect of their Sims romantic lives. Details under the cut.

You'll need Traits /and stuff required for these to work/.

Credits: @atomtanned , @lilbabydilljr , Epi for their TO replacements, @lazyduchess for Lua script

@peanuttysims for No Zodiac & Aspiration attraction (MTS2 link)

I used TS4 icons, icon mashups/ edits, and my own.

Thanks: @tvickiesims , @vegan-kaktus , @lilakartoffelbrei . Special thanks to @episims for all the support 💎🤗

*This is for The Sims 2

More under the cut:

Trait-based Chemistry mod

It will replace original TS2 turn-ons and turn-offs with entirely new ones (only hair colors and fitness/fatness are unchanged!).

It conflicts with NickM406's No More Loading the * Family mod , and Tunaisafish’s Attraction Fix, make sure you don't have tunaisafish_fix_attractiontraits package in your Downloads.

🟢 It's compatible with mods that change /or switch off Zodiac chemistry, Aspiration chemistry, or both.

⚡TURN-ONS / TURN-OFFS:

Note: I've added and removed some stuff, for example Plantsims and Bigfoot from 'Occult' TO, and Zombies from 'Undead' TO!

(This is an edit of the list posted by Atomtanned: )

Adventurous: 3 vacations, Adventurous, Daredevil, Sailor, Brave

Alien: Trait, skin, eyes

Animal Lover: 2 pet friends, Animal Lover, Cat Person, Dog Person, Equestrian

Artistic: Artistic, Avant Garde, Photographer's Eye, Savvy Sculptor, Flower Arranging/Pottery/Sewing silver badge, Arts & Crafts hobby, Creative skill

Athletic: Athletic, Equestrian, Loves to Swim, Sports/Fitness hobby, Body skill

Business shark: Born-salesperson, Ambitious, Mean Spirited, Snob, Workaholic

Charismatic (charisma): Charismatic, Irresistible, Schmoozer, Star Quality, Charisma skill

Cultured (bookish): Avant Garde, Bookworm, Film & Literature Hobby

Expressive: Excitable, Childish, Party Animal, Dramatic, Over-Emotional, Diva

Facial hair

Fitness / Fatness - original

Foodie: Natural Cook, Cuisine hobby, Cooking skill

Hair colors - original

Indoorsy: Bookworm, Computer Whiz, Couch Potato, Hates the Outdoors, Film & Literature Hobby, Games Hobby

Infamous (bad reputation): Bad Reputation*, Evil, Mean-Spirited

Intellect (high IQ): Genius, Logic Skill

Introvert (reserved): Brooding, Loner, Unflirty, Shy, No sense of humor, Grumpy, Socially Awkward, < 2 Outgoing personality points

Laid Back (slacker): Couch Potato, Mooch, Slob, < 2 Active personality points

Musical: Natural Born Performer, Star Quality, Virtuoso, Music & Dance hobby

Occult (mystical): Werewolf, Witch, Fairy, Mermaid, Supernatural Fan

Outdoorsy: Angler, Green Thumb, Loves the Outdoors, Sailor, Gardening badge, Fishing badge, Nature hobby

Outgoing (social): Irresistible, Flirty, Natural Born Performer, Party Animal, Social Butterfly, > 8 Outgoing personality points

Plant Lover: Eco-Friendly, Gatherer, Green Thumb, Vegetarian, Flower/Gardening badge, Plantsim, Fairy

Rebellious: Daredevil, Inappropriate, Hot-headed, Rebellious.

Stylish (elegance): Snob, Diva, Irresistible, Cosmetology badge, Fashion interest, Formal wear

Technology: Servo, Bot Fan, Computer Whiz, Handy, Vehicle Enthusiast, Robotics silver Badge, Mechanical skill

Tidy: Neat, Cleaning skill, > 8 Neat personality points

Undead: Ghost*, Vampire

Well-Liked: Good reputation*, Friendly, Good, Proper, Nurturing.

*"Ghosts" = sims turned into playable ghosts, with Ghost trait (and Mermaids are sims with mermaid trait, but ofc you don't need these to be able to use this mod).

🔸 Hobby requirements in Dill's / Atomtanned's versions (as well as interest) were set to 5 points, which is kinda an average in my game. I don't want TOs to trigger too easily so I've increased these to 8 points, just like Skill point requirements.

I also increased good reputation requirement from 30 to 60.

Above is the comparison of original vs new TOs, in the exact order.

FYI I've fixed the little mistake I've found in the mod - in my version stylish TO works as it should.

If you have any questions about how the game calculates attraction, read this.

And here's free version (SFS) of my buyable ReNuYu potion default, will be useful if you'd like to correct TOs for all your Sims.

"ONLY TO Chemistry" mod

Conflicts with No Zodiac Chemistry by Belladovah , chemistry mods by Peanutty (it incorporates their "No zodiac and no Aspiration"mod) and any other that contain Attraction Constants BCON and Attraction Tuning BCON.

In unmodded TS2 game, interests and skills do not play part in attraction. Trait-based chemistry changes that only to some extent because Zodiac and Aspiration are more important. To make TOs the crucial attraction factor in my game, I disabled Zodiac / Aspiration Chemistry, and tweaked bolt requirements.

This mod makes chemistry between Sims straightforward and TO-based however various bonuses to attraction also apply (!), like Beauty Wish, Vacation bonuses, bonus for very good rep or penalty for extremely bad reputation (even if your Sim likes bad guys, they will be put off by Dirty Dirtbag status, and enticed by extremely good rep). Anyways, if you use this mod and your Sims have no other attraction bonuses, then:

if one Sim has a turn-on towards the other, and the other has none, it results in no bolts

if one Sim has two turn-ons towards the other, and the other has none, Sims have one bolt chemistry

if one Sim has a turn-on towards the other, and the other has a turn-off, it results in negative chemistry

if a couple has single turn-ons towards each other, it gives them one-bolt chemistry

couple has three turn-ons, that gives them two bolts

couple has three turn-ons, one turn-off, that gives them one bolt

couple has double turn-ons, they have three-bolt chemistry

Special bonuses granted by mods for certain Traits like the "irresistible" still matter of course.

[golden-cherry]

deal - cl16 (8/?)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.

Chapter Summary: It's always nice meeting new people. Especially British ones.

Warnings: fluff, flirting, one swear word, social media aspect

Word Count: 3.3k

series masterlist

previous part

A/N: this chapter is for everyone who send me kind words when I was feeling down. even tho I don't answer every single message, I read everything you send me. I love you.

You look desperately at the piece of paper in your hand. 

You have the chicken breast, the avocado and the kale and garlic. According to the signs in the shop, two aisles down are the jars of sun-dried tomatoes that you also need. But where the heck are the sesame seeds and chilli flakes?

You rub your forehead with the back of your hand. 

For twenty minutes you have been walking through the supermarket, which is so much bigger than the one around the corner from you. Ten minutes ago you put the chicken in the shopping basket, which is hanging down on your elbow. And since then you have been wandering the aisles with little success, trying to find the rest that Charles scribbled on the piece of paper. 

When you left the bedroom this morning, your roommate had already disappeared. He had stowed his sleeping things in the wardrobe and tidied up the living room. Even the dishes had disappeared from the sink. Apparently he got up very early. 

After drinking a glass of orange juice, you found the note on the kitchen table that Charles had left there. 

"Bonjour, 

Je suis à la salle de sport ce matin. I'm at the gym this morning.

Pourriez-vous acheter ces choses pour le déjeuner ? Could you please buy these things for lunch?

Merci, mon ami. 

Charles

PS.: Mes amis et moi sortons ce soir et j'aimerais que tu viennes avec moi. My friends and I are going out tonight and I would like you to come along".

Next to it was another piece of paper with the shopping list for the bowl his nutritionist had picked out for him. Judging by the ingredients, Charles has good taste and for a moment you had considered buying a double portion - one for him and one for you - but the toast lying in your kitchen is about to go bad and you are reluctant to throw it away. Besides, no food in the world can beat a good sandwich.

But reading the list, you also realise that the small supermarket around the corner would not be enough to get everything.

The employee you asked a few minutes ago gave you a rough direction where you could find the sesame seeds, but he disappeared so quickly that you couldn't follow up. And since then you've been standing in a corridor that looks like you might find them here. But you've read through every label on every shelf, and although your French has improved - and you have a translator app on your phone - none of them sounded remotely like sesame or seeds.

"A pretty lady wasn't on my shopping list today, but I can be spontaneous," you hear someone with a British accent say behind you.

As you turn around, a young man is standing in front of you. He is a little taller than you and wears a black hoodie with his hands in his pockets and a black cap on his head. Although it is winter, his skin is tanned, and as he grins broadly, you see a small gap between his white front teeth.

You hesitate for a moment, trying to gauge whether he is really serious, and glance briefly at your shopping list before turning to face him fully. "An overeager man is not on mine either. And unfortunately, since I have to stick to my budget, I can't be quite as spontaneous."

His grin widens even more. "So the pick-up line was that lousy?"

His smile is so honest and friendly it's infectious. "Terrible."

The young man presses his tongue into his cheek before pulling his hand out of his jumper pocket to hold it out to you. "Lando. Nice to meet you."

As you place your hand in his, you feel the warmth of his skin. "Y/N."

Before you can respond, Lando snatches the piece of paper in your hand. His eyes flicker over the ingredients on it and then over the contents of your shopping basket. "You've been standing here for ten minutes. Do you need any help?"

You narrow your eyes and try to reach for the list in his big hands, but he is quicker. He pulls his hand away. "Have you been watching me? See if the note says stalker."

He pretends to go through the ingredients again, but his gaze lingers on you again after a few moments. "Stalker it doesn't say, but helpful stranger it does." He holds the note up to your nose. "Right under chicken breast. See. Right there. In invisible ink."

You push your lower lip forward and consider whether you should accept his help. The only thing against it is the fact that you can usually help yourself. But since he has already noticed how helplessly you search for the missing groceries, the argument is not exactly convincing.

"Alright." You extend your arm and wave it in a semicircle in front of you. "Show me the way."

Lando leads the way as you follow him through the shop. Despite his jumper, you can see that his cross is relatively wide. Not as wide as Charles, but still enough to be noticeable. 

"You don't seem to be from around here, do you?" asks Lando as you walk past the cheese shelf. He looks down at you. 

"I've actually lived here for months, but I've never been to this supermarket," you admit, shrugging. "The stuff on the list isn't for me, it's for my roommate. I'm not much of a bowl fan."

The helpful stranger stops abruptly in front of a shelf, causing you to bump lightly into him. You can still feel the hard muscles through the many layers of clothing. "What are you more into?" When you look at him with a raised eyebrow, he rolls his eyes. "Food-wise, I mean."

"Culinarily, I'm afraid I've stayed at McDonalds level. Or frozen pizza." As Lando grins, you lightly punch his arm. "I know, I know. Like a kid."

He reaches out and takes a packet from the shelf, and as he puts it in the basket, you see that it's sesame seeds. He then takes the basket from your hand. "So I don't need to take you to a super fancy, expensive restaurant? You'd be happy with take-out as well?" He tilts his head and raises an eyebrow. 

Apparently he can't help it. But you find his boyish charm not annoying, rather amusing. 

You raise your hand and poke your index finger against his chest. "You could buy me a can of soup, too, and I'd be blown away."

Lando is too surprised to retort, so he lowers his eyes to the list in his hand. You can still see the blush that comes to his face. He clears his throat. "Chilli flakes should be here somewhere too. Ah, there. Right behind you." He leans forward a little and reaches past you. As you inhale, you can smell his perfume.

"Thanks for your help, Lando," you say as you stand together at the checkout a little later, putting your purchase into a bag. "I don't know what I would have done without you." Your smile is genuine and you're glad he returns it. If it hadn't been for him, you'd almost certainly still be standing here tomorrow looking for the ingredients.

"I'm glad I could help." As you take your groceries from him, he shoulders the bag and shakes his head. "Would it be weird if I asked you if I could walk you home?"

"It would." You've both known each other for a few minutes and for sure it's unwise for a young stranger to find out where you live. Yet something about him makes you trust him. As Lando's mouth curls into a thin line, you smile kindly at him. "But weird is okay."

His expression brightens instantly. "Great. Show me the way. I'll follow you."

The walk home takes thirty minutes, but it feels much shorter with Lando by your side. He's two years older than you and incredibly funny, which is why your stomach starts to hurt from laughing at some point. He talks about what it was like growing up in England and that although he has his permanent home here in Monaco, he still works there. 

"So you're always flying back and forth? Isn't that very tiring?" you ask him. The house where your home is located comes into your field of vision. In a moment you are about to say goodbye and somehow you have a feeling that he would make an attempt to ask for your number. 

"It's very exhausting," he confesses, but shrugs. "But you know yourself what it's like to live here. Monaco is beautiful and I love it. Besides, many of my friends live here. It's definitely worth the stress for me."

You stop at the front door and Lando's smile disappears from his face as he realises that your time - for now - is up. He hands you your groceries, which he's been carrying for you like a gentleman for the last half hour. 

"Thank you. For your help and the nice company," you thank him and fish the front door key out of your pocket.

Lando puts his hands back in the pockets of his jumper, undecided whether to hug you goodbye or not. "I have to thank you." He pulls his lower lip between his teeth for a moment. "Can I see you again? Maybe for dinner? I'll get your favourite can of soup too," he grins and you have to laugh out loud.

"I'd love to," you reply. Why green eyes and dimples suddenly flash in the back of your mind, you don't know.

"Great. Do you have Instagram?" he asks and you look at him, confused. He raises a hand and scratches the back of his neck nervously with it. "I'd ask for your number, but I don't think you're someone who gives out their number to helpful strangers just because they're friendly."

You turn your head and point to the front door. "Well, you already know where I live, after all. And yet you ask for my Instagram?"

He licks his lips once with his tongue. "I didn't mean to be too forward."

You look down at your shopping bag, then back up at him. "You? Forward? No way."

You tell him your Instagram name and he saves it before you say goodbye with a hug that, in retrospect, you might find a little too brief. But Lando doesn't seem to want to cross any lines, which is why he only puts one arm around you to pull you close for a moment, not pressing you tightly against him but leaving some space between you.

"I'll get back to you," he says as you put the key in the door lock and turn it. "Promise."

When you enter the apartment minutes later, Charles is sitting on the couch, staring at his laptop, which is on the coffee table in front of him. You feel his gaze on you as you close the door behind you and slip off your shoes.

"Bonjour, Y/N." He gets up and follows you into the kitchen, where you take the groceries out of the bag and place them on the countertop. "Thank you for shopping. Did you sleep well?"

You did indeed. Whether it was the wine or the fact that you really enjoyed your evening with him, you don't know. When you woke up this morning and found that Charles had already left, you had been a little too relieved. The thoughts you harboured towards him last night make you feel guilty, so you decide to repress them and forget about them. 

Everything that happened last night was purely amicable, which his "mon ami" on the note also confirms. Secretly, you are glad that he sees it that way too. If he were to give you signs of being interested, you would have to think seriously about the whole situation. And you don't want that.

You're happy living with Charles. And even though you've only known each other for two days, you're sure he's a better friend than anyone else has ever been. No one in your old group of friends had ever been so friendly, so helpful, so caring. 

If that's how friends behave, then you never really had any.

"Well," you answer him. "I'm still alive, although I didn't lock the door yesterday. That certainly lets me sleep well."

Charles smiles and reaches for the chicken breast, which he rinses and seasons as you put a pan of oil on the hob. "Or maybe I just want you to feel safe. And someday, when you're not expecting it, I'll catch you," he jokes. 

"And that's exactly why I was serious about my offer last night," you return, watching as he puts the chicken into the hot oil. You hear it hiss and bubble. "That you can sleep in bed tonight. I don't mind. After all, it's your bed. And it's only fair that you use it."

Charles turns the chicken in the pan and looks at you. "And you're not just doing this so I won't murder you while you sleep?" His grin widens. 

"That, my friend, is a nice side effect."

While the chicken sizzles away, you prepare the avocado and Charles the kale. "It's all right, Y/N. It's only been the second night on the couch. And I promise you nothing will happen that would make you lock the door."

"But last night you -"

"Last night the wine was talking out of me when I sent you the picture," he interrupts. "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine." His smile is gentle. "That's what we agreed and that's what we'll stick to."

"That we agreed, I know," you confirm, digging a bowl out of the cupboard. Charles fills it with the ingredients and finally puts the roasted chicken on top. You turn off the hob. "But I don't think we have to stick rigidly to that rule for this," you point to the space between you, "to work. We're friends, not strangers. And as your friend, I can't have you breaking your back."

You see Charles swallow before turning away and picking up the bowl. Apparently he doesn't know what to say in response, because he changes the subject as you sit down on the couch together. "So, are you coming tonight? We were going out for dinner and then to a club. You don't have to come if you don't want to, of course, but I'd love to introduce you to my friends. We're a cool group and I think you'd fit in quite well." He spears a piece of avocado with his fork. "Besides, maybe I can take your mind off your asshole of an ex-boyfriend that way."

That's right. There was something. 

You haven't had to think about him since last night. About him calling you all the time and spoiling your mood. That he cheated on you a while back and broke your heart. 

Charles managed, with just a film and his company, to make you forget the pain and anger. In his presence you felt comfortable, warm, which was perhaps also a little due to the wine. And as you thought back over the evening, a feeling spread through you that you could not describe. 

The only word you can think of to describe this feeling is Charles.

"I didn't mean to remind you," your roommate says softly when you don't answer him. His eyes are fixed on his food. "Sorry."

You shake your head, more to let him know that your thoughts are not about your ex-boyfriend, but about Charles's kindness and care, but apparently he takes it as accepting the apology. He exhales in relief. 

"So? Are you coming with me later? With my friends and me?", Charles asks again. 

Isn't it too early to meet his friends? You two haven't known each other for very long either. But after all, you would be there as his roommate slash friend, not as his girlfriend. So for him, there's no reason why you shouldn't be there. So there is none for you either. 

"Do I need to wear anything nice? My wardrobe isn't exactly the most elegant," you confess, pointing to the oversized jumper hanging from your shoulders and the black leggings down your legs. 

Charles' gaze moves from your face, across your torso, down further to the tops of your feet, which are inches away from his. "It doesn't matter what you wear. You look beautiful in anything."

You hope he doesn't notice how hard you have to swallow the lump in your throat. "Then I'll come with you."

Satisfied, Charles puts a piece of chicken in his mouth and chews on it. As his cell phone vibrates on the table in front of you, he stiffens a little. 

From your position you can see that an unknown number is calling him. And you can well understand his reaction to it. You definitely wouldn't answer a call either if you didn't know who it was from. A short time later the phone is silent again and the screen goes black again. Charles visibly relaxes.

"I think calls from unknown numbers are totally nerve-wracking," you try to lighten the situation a little. "There was a time when I let the phone keep ringing, but now I just press unknown callers away."

Charles looks to you. "Would you press my call away?"

You draw your eyebrows together. "Well, since I don't have your number, I probably would."

Your roommate presses his tongue into his cheek. "Then it would be better if I gave it to you, no?"

Without a word, you hand him your unlocked phone - which looks really puny in his big hands - so he can punch in his number before calling himself. As he hands it back to you, he picks up his own phone to put your number in, deleting the unknown call. 

"Give me your Instagram, please."

You look at him uncertainly, but give him your name. "Do you need anything else? My credit card number? Birth certificate? National insurance number?"

"No, you dickhead." He taps away on his phone and a moment later a notification pops up on your screen. 

bawsixteen started following you

You open the app and click on his account and on the "Follow" button and a few moments later his entire profile is visible to you. He hasn't posted many pictures, some you recognise from Jori's place, but one in particular catches your eye. 

"So, tonight we're going out for dinner. Around eight, so we have to leave around around quarter to." Charles puts the empty bowl on the table and turns to you. "I have to leave in a few minutes. Will you be okay on your own until then? I don't think I'll be gone too long." 

You wonder if he's going to the woman he spoke to on the phone yesterday. "I'm an adult, Charles. I'll be fine," you smile. "Maybe by then I'll find a nice potato sack to wear later."

Charles laughs, gets up and goes into the kitchen to wash the bowl. "If you can find a second one that might fit me, bring it along. Then we could go in matching clothes. That would be something." You hear him turn on the tap at the sink. "Well, if you find one, you can call me."

"As long as you promise to answer." You turn and lean your arm over the back of the couch to watch him. His back muscles stand out under his shirt and you can see them moving. 

Charles looks over his shoulder at you and smiles. "Deal."

-

liked by joris_trouche and others

bawsixteen: 📍📸 the most beautiful place in Monaco

next part

[vivwritesfics]

hiii!!! if you can can you please make a fanfic like (sorry for my bad explaining) basically a fluff fic with oscar piastri and y/n where they meet at like the streets of paris or something romantic like that? (you can give it any ending you want lols)

one of my best friends is from paris and we talk about how it's not the romantic place we all fantasize it to be. but i got you boo

Paris, France:

The hotel was awful, just awful. But that was what she got she got for booking her holiday on a budget.

The bed must have had bedbugs. She saw one review online (after she had checked in) that suggested it. And, ever since, she could feel the little fuckers crawling all over her skin.

If the bathroom wasn't down the hall, she would have been throwing up from anxiety. But, instead, she shut her eyes and tried to fall asleep.

And then her neighbours started shagging. Like, bed hitting the wall behind her kind of shagging. Holy shit, she needed to get out of here.

Grabbing her jacket and placing her valuables into her pockets, she headed out of the hotel.

The streets of Paris were a little bit terrifying in the dark. If one of her friends had just done with her, they could have gotten a nicer hotel and she wouldn't have been terrified to walk the streets in the dark. She shouldn't have been out there, she knew, but it was either have a panic attack on the disgusting floor of the hotel room or get out for some fresh air.

It was like there were eyes on her all the time she was walking. She pulled her jacket closer to her body and walked a little faster. Her eyes were trained on the floor as she pretty much marched down the streets of Paris.

Her body collided with somebody else. "Shit," she cried as this persons arms wrapped around her, stopping her from falling.

"Are you okay?" He asked, voice not accompanied by a French accent. "Sorry, I should have been looking at where I was going." He shook his head, floppy, Prince-Charming-from-Shrek hair falling in front of his face.

"It's okay," she said, tightening her grip on the things in her pocket.

He released her. "I'm Oscar," he said, holding out his hand.

She didn't take it, but she did smile at him. "Nice to meet you, Oscar," she replied, not giving her own name.

It was almost like a game, on the streets of Paris. Oscar twisted his wrist and looked at his watch. "Where are you headed? Do you need me to walk you there?"

The red flag in the back of her head was taking a long ass time to raise. "I'm good," she said, because he was still a stranger on the streets of Paris. She began to walk past him. "It really was nice to meet you, Oscar," she said and began walking again.

Santorini, Greece:

The view from her balcony was so fucking pretty. The glittering ocean, the pale sand, the gorgeous architecture. It was a far cry from Paris.

Even on a budget she'd managed somewhere nice. A lot nicer than that hotel room in Paris. Here she felt safe. She left her valuable things in her hotel room (in the safe) and went out to dinner.

It was so damn peaceful. This was the getaway she needed, not those few nights in Paris. This was fucking bliss.

But then he showed up. She was in a little beach front restaurant, having a drink when he came walking past. What did he say his name was? Oscar? What the hell was he doing in Greece?

Her initial reaction was to think he had been followed. But the way he was looking at her, all confused before that look of familiarity crossed his face, it was all so genuine.

"Are you following me?" He asked it in such a teasing way, she immediately knew he wasn't serious.

She kicked out the chair in front of her. "Come have a drink with me, Oscar."

He obeyed and sat himself in the seat opposite her. Almost immediately a waiter came over to take his drink order. As soon as the waiter was gone, she was staring at him. "So, tell me about yourself, Oscar."

"Aren't you gonna tell me your name?" He asked as she sipped her drink.

She thought about it for a moment. "Tell you what, tell me about yourself, and I'll tell you my name."

He held out his hand, and this time she took it. "Deal."

Italy:

Italy had never been on her list of destinations. She didn't understand why not, because it was gorgeous.

But seeing the sights was such a small part of it. She walked behind Oscar, Oscar Piastri the Formula One driver, as he led her through the paddock.

"This can't be real," she said for the fourteenth time since they'd climbed out of the car.

Oscar laughed at her. "It's real," he assured her as he took her to the McLaren garage. He stopped for a second and gave her a minute to step closer and take his hand.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me you were a race car driver," she said as she squeezed his hand. It wasn't a comforting squeeze, but it had Oscar laughing, again.

"I did," he insisted.

"Yeah, after we'd had four cocktails!"

He led her through the garage, to his drivers room. "Okay, okay. How can I make it up to you?"

He shut the door behind him and she stepped closer. "Hmm," she said and pushed his hair out of his face. "Take me back to Paris?"

"Paris?"

She hummed.

"Okay," he answered, still holding her hand. "I'll take you back to Paris."

[buckyhad]

Teaching time

Pairing: Boyfriend!Max Verstappen x reader x Bestfriend!Charles Leclerc

Summary: Where Charles is your bestfriend,and teach Max,your boyfriend how to fuck you.

Warnings: oral (f), alcohol, google translated french and dutch, idk what else

Charles was looking for a movie to watch for what felt like an hour, your mood not being the best this days, you started to get frustrated with your best friend.

"God, Charlie, choose one already" you barked.

"Gid chirlii" He mocked you. "Why are you in such a mood lately?" He asked then.

"I don't know what you are talking about"

"Yes you do" he laughed "I know you very well, now tell me" you always loved Charles' accent, and hearing it sothed your mood a little.

"I can't tell you" you mumbled.

Charles let it be, being your best friend for ages now, he knew that you would cometo him later.

You friendship with him went through all the phases, friends, best-friends, friends with benefits, back to best-friends when Max, one of his friends, told him how much he liked you.

Max, your now boyfriend was the sweetest man ever, hot, caring, loving, funny, think of something good, the guy has it.

But God, he wasn't the best in bed, you really wanted to cry, tore beetwen hurting his feelings or not cuming for what felt like an eternity.

"Chaaarlesss" a very drunk Max slumped next to him on the couch.

"Maaaaxx" an ecually drunk Charles answered.

"Im so fuck mate"

"What happend?" He answered fast, the guy loved to gossip of course, but he also knew it has something to do with your mood.

"You know that I dont doubt that she loves me a lot, but I think she's pretending her orgasms" Max said.

Charles laughed, he was drunk, it wasn't his fault that Max decided to talk about something serious when they both where that drunk.

"Im so sorry mate, no more laughing" he stoped when he saw Max's face. "Why would you think that?"

"You saw how grumpy she is, why do you doubt me" he covered his face "Stop laughing mate, I feel you shaking" he growled.

"Did you talk to her?"

"Don't know how, what if she isn't and I make her feel bad?"

"Charles?" Max looked up to find that he was alone "Great"

Fifteen minutes later, Charles was back with you by his side, probably as drunk as them.

"My loove" you smiled, sitting on Max's lap.

"Max said you can't cum when you fuck"

"Charlie!" "Mate!" You two talked at the same time.

"What? Im trying to solve a problem here" he shrugged.

You paused for a moment, what better time to have a serious conversation than while drunk?

"I'm sorry Max, you're right" you faced him "I didn't want to hurt your feelings"

"I'm the one whos sorry love, I just don't know how" he answered with his face burning red, having a intimate talk while Charles was looking at them wasn't in his plans for the night.

"Charles go away" Max whined.

"No! I helped, I wanna listen"

"God, you're the biggest gossip I know"

"But you are also friends with Pierre?" He asked confused "I just wanna help you two" he pouted.

"How could you help us?" You asked while laughing.

"I don't know" Charles shrugged "I just cant stand you with this mood".

"Hey!" You said hitting his arm while laughing.

"Wait" Max said "He can teach me!"

"What?!" "I'm a great teacher, you know"

"No way, no fucking way"

"Why not? You've already fuck him, he knows you, he knows me, we can cross threesome from our list, it's perfect!"

"You are really drunk Maxi" you said "You will regret saying that tomorrow"

Max, in fact, didn't regret it, and after some talking and setting some bounderies, there you were, Charles, Max and you in your bed.

"This is fucking crazy, I hope you know this" you said to your boyfriend

"And you like it" he shrugged.

"I like it too" Charles said.

"You are even crazier than him".

"Why chèrie? Because I can make you cum?" Charles murmured while getting closer to your lips "It's that it?" He said nuzzling his nose agains your neck "Come here Max, kiss her" he got away from you.

Your boyfriend did was he was told, kissing you fiercely. Placing his big hand in your thight and giving a squeeze, earning a quiet moan.

"Go to her neck now, slow" Charles commanded .

You started to lay down, with the dutch on top of you and the monegasque watching.

"Open more your legs love" Max said in between kisses and peeling off your summer dress.

"Kiss your way down" your bestfriend couldn't take his eyes of yours.

Max started his trail down to your breast, taking your bra so he could suck on your breast.

"Fuck, you're so pretty my love" he said making you moan.

"More Maxi, please" you whined, you didn't need that much preparation, having him and Charles watching you was enough. He continued his way down, hooking his thumbs on your panties, pulling it down your legs, and throwing it somewhere in the room.

"Bite her thights".

Max earned a loud gasp from you after that, and your hand tucking his hair.

"Please" you whined.

"Please what love?"

"Eat me out, please" he started with a light kiss, that made you grunt and open more your legs, and then he finally licked your pussy, making you cry out "Fuck, feels so good".

"Mate" Charles whined "Can I touch her, please" he beg watching you.

"Yes please, I want him too"

Max looked up to you, nooding his head, and that was enough for Charles to kiss you. He was hungry, missing being with you wherever he wanted.

"Fuck, i've miss this" he whispered while entering a finger in you, Max just kept licking you.

"It's too much" you cried.

"I know you can take it love" the blonde said, watching your abs start to contract and your legs shaking.

Some more thrusts from Charles' fingers and some flicking of Max tongue, you came.

"God you look so hot like that" Charles growled.

"Can't believe I've been missing this view".

"Our turn now, chèrie".

A/N: finally, here it is, enjoy. Happy almost spain gp!

[mjbarrosart]

I did a little fanart of all the Fontaine characters.

I am enjoining a lot this new region in Genshin. Sumeru was fine, but was not my cup of tea. Decadent French degenerates?? that is right on my alley!

Also the music of Fontaine RULES!

I'll share my opinions about every character, so...

SPOILERS FOR 4.1

_______________________________________

Charlotte: A missed opportunity to do something amazing with her as a journalist. She could be a character that makes interesting commentary about Fontaine injustices, but nah, she is just chasing "a big headline", zero interest for the truth.

Freminet: He is cute. I like him.

Lynette: I love her. I wish the game put her more in the spotlight, right now just feels like a prop for Lyney and that is a shame.

Lyney: He is fine. His outfit always makes me laugh.

Furina: My baby girl, the bane of my existence, my favorite Archon ever. We don't accept Furina slander in this household. I see her as an overwhelmed person who needs to put this all this show in order to keep feeding the Oratrice, while everyone is just taking her as incompetent without knowing what kind of sacrifices she is doing, idk, she is a really interesting Archon to me. I love the idea of her being cursed, and her interactions with Arlecchino made me really sad, I feel bad for her, she is not having a good time...I hope her story don't disappoint me, hahaha.

Neuvilette: Old man, autistic coded dragon for the win, I really like him. He is also a little of a drama queen with all this "I don't belong here" stuff while outside literally 90% of Fontaine is a member of the "we love Neuvillette fan club"

Wriothesley: He is fine. I like his interactions with Neuvilette and him as Clorinde's friend. My problem with him is this thing that Genshin likes to do of "is not the system that is bad just you need to be sure to have good people on the top" kind of discourse that is really bad. So him as a cop/jail administrator kinda is another missed opportunity to make a little more commentary, but maybe I'm asking for too much.

Sigewinne: I really like her after the Archon quest. Haha, you can not trust her. Lol.

Navia: I love this woman with all my heart. She is the best, smart, badass and beautiful. Also incredibly gay for Clorinde, I love their drama. I want more Navia content now!

Clorinde: I am a sword lesbian, so she is right on my alley. I like her serious but not stoic attitude, and how she turns into a wet cat in front of Navia, lol. I want to learn more about her. She is cool.

[flowerbloom-arts]

AU where the Shifting Mound doesn't snatch the Damsel so soon and you have to deal with the repercussions of existing past "Happily Ever After" with a voluntarily undeveloped Sweet Love Interest™.

(also, yippee finally found a way to put my 2 interests together!!)

(absolutely incomprehensible ramble under the cut.)

Okay so I'm going to make this as understandable as possible for the uninitiated, whether it be for the Moomin comic strip or the franchise at large.

The plushie the Damsel is holding is that of the Snork Maiden (or just Snorkmaiden), the girlfriend/love interest for the main character, Moomintroll. Now, Snorkmaiden is an interesting and largely misunderstood character, especially when it comes to her comic version where she's a bit of a "promiscuous" character who oftentimes ditches Moomintroll for another man when she sees fit, this is where the misunderstanding lies.

Snorkmaiden haters will dismiss this (if they were to read the comics, because in all honesty they aren't that widely considered or even read in the fandom) as an addition to her general unlikeability as an "obstacle" to the fandom's main gay ship between Moomintroll and his best friend, Snorkmaiden sympathizers will leap to justify this with the good ol' It Was Heteronormativity All Along, which is a very... Honestly lazy reading/justification of her character which doesn't hold up under scrutiny. I, however, have an obviously superior reading of her character (/not serious)

Snorkmaiden simply has a very different definition of romance or at least wants to gain something different out of the concept of romance as opposed to the general public perception built up around it, one which even Moomintroll can't even begin to grasp.

What she gets out of romance, and where it begins and ends for her, is the adventurous fall and honeymoon of it, and each new man she gets into a relationship with is thematically appropriate to the adventure/problem of the week that she and her boyfriend's family are currently facing. When she goes to the French Riviera she starts dating a rich actor because it is a tourist shoreline city where all the celebrities go, when she finds herself in the wintery unknown (she and the Moomins usually hibernate through it, they're creatures like that) she catches a crush on a professional winter sportsman, when she decides to live a hedonist life because some self-proclaimed prophet came in and told everyone to she decides to start it by running away with someone new, when she gets a job as a secretary she falls in love with a coworker who is really interested in accounting, so on and so forth. Even with Moomintroll, they fell in love upon her introduction and Moomintroll signifies a new life in the valley in which they currently live in.

And in the end all of these new romances fall apart either due to unfortunate circumstances, Moomintroll's jealous intervention or her simply becoming disinterested eventually, and in the end of all of them she returns to Moomintroll, as per formulaic comic strip storytelling. (I must mention that Moomintroll also falls in love with other women based on their looks, and he also fell in love with Snorkmaiden because he thought she was pretty, so, he's not that much better really)

This is a repeating cycle, one that Snorkmaiden is simply incapable of breaking out of due to the conventions of her narrative. No matter what she tries, where she goes, who she gets with, she'll always end up back in Moomintroll's arms whether he "earns it back through chivalry" or she runs back to him much to her previous chagrin. It's a self-fulfilling cycle too, in one comic it's shown that she's so used to Moomintroll's behavior that it sours her current relationship with an already bad partner even further. If she was capable of Truly Leaving then she stopped being capable at that point. Snorkmaiden is stuck with a long-term boyfriend when she normally strives in a short-term relationship.

She's also deeply entrenched in romance tropes and loves to roleplay them with Moomintroll, and especially loves them when she thinks they're real, these tropes she fancies usually tend toward kidnapping (and not alot of rescuing) or romantic sacrifice such as dueling or... Romeo and Juliet. These things are extensions of her ideas on what romance is, more about the short-term thrill than the long-term contentment.

Of course, with most Moomin media having a child demographic as opposed to the adult newspaper readers of the comics, Snorkmaiden's character in adaptations of these stories get presented without the depth or the means for that depth, as she gets presented as either a somewhat boring playdate to Moomintroll with grand, childish ideas of romance or a naggy girlfriend whom the writers try to make feminist but ultimately fails to deliver on anything subversive or substantial.

How this ties into the Princess is the cyclical nature of it all, the choices with no branching ends, the new experiences with seemingly no development, the change and then the sudden stop. And with the Damsel in particular it is the reduction of such an interesting and intriguing person full of potential to a cutout of a simple Love Interest. All that anguish is suddenly washed away into something more palatable, a parody of a fairytale princess, a goodness so pure that it is sickening, no motivation behind the eyes except for one simple goal.

Now. Don't get me wrong, the Damsel is my favorite princess, between the Adversaries and the Towers and the Witches and Wilds, the Damsel is the one which captivated my singular interest, becaus I'm not immune to her trappings of adorable beauty and saccharine sweetness with no other motivation than to make her hero happy, I believe that it's a combination of the player's desire for her to be a normal princess they can have a happy ending with but also her willfully stripping herself out of guilt of what she's done to the player.

She stripped herself of any real personhood just to make us happy, and that is the purest motivation anyone can have, really, a terribly misguided one but the sentiment is immeasurable. I pity her and I love her and I want her to be so genuinely happy because of what she's gone through but I know very well that she's incapable of that because the decisions the player chose made her that way, she is made incapable of genuine happiness without total dependence on the player's feelings and that really breaks my heart.

It breaks my heart when she's reduced to a crappy middle school anime drawing when she's put through the pressure of getting interrogated or being told strange things about what would make the player happy.

It breaks my heart when she's finally free but then immediately met with the coldness of the Shifting Mound and thought that coldness was happiness.

It breaks my heart when she accepts her second death with tears in her eyes and a smile because she thinks that's what made the player happy, and yet somehow she couldn't accept it as a real decision the player made on their own because in the first time she was warned that they were possessed, so the only conclusion she could come up with was that the cabin was causing this pain and so as the Grey she decides to burn the whole place to the ground and stare at you lovingly until her face melts away.

It breaks my heart that the Grey is in a wedding dress, on top of that.

She's so desperate to cling onto the first person to show her kindness that she seems to have become broken over it. She's so terribly tragic that I can't help but keep thinking about her and the million heartbreaks knowing that she's so lovely and selfless but she wasn't Real anymore.

I want her to have a massive fairytale wedding like at the end of Disney's old Cinderella movie and live forever with some physical manifestation of Voice of the Smitten. I want her to come back to personhood and cry and not be snapped like a twig over it. I want the Damsel to be happy in any way she seems fit to be but I know that can never happy, both by the nature of the game but also in the very programming of her character.

She is trapped, whether it's in the cabin, her own circular mentality or as part of the Shifting Mound, she's incapable of of being really free as her own person unless you count the ending of us leaving with the no-blade blade starter princess.

... And that's why I think she should hold a massive Snorkmaiden fair prize won by her darling new butch knight girlfriend.

[thatfandomslut]

Regina George's Sister

Cady Heron x Reader

Word Count: 1.2k

Trigger Warnings: protective relationship, secret relationship

Request:

mayhaps a cady heron x reader where reader is regina’s sister and cady and reader have been secretly dating for months because neither of them want regina to find out but then regina ends up catching them kissing or something idk im bad at requests feel free to go nuts😭😭

Mean Girls requests are open.

A/N: I could not figure out how to end this, so please forgive me.

If there was one thing anyone needed to know about Regina post-Spring Fling, it was that she didn't change much. She was just kinder to Gretchen and Karen, who still loyally followed Regina along. She still instilled fear in those around her, even if she was much nicer than she had been. Once a Queen Bee regains her crown, it's hard to repossess it. This was the prime reason Cady and (Y/n) decided to keep their relationship a secret from the blonde due to how protective she was over her younger sister. The problem was, despite being together for the past three months, they were very bad at keeping their relationship a secret.

It was Janis and Damian who were the ones to usually catch them making out under the stairwell. Which is where they found Cady and (Y/n) today, too. The two were on their way to French class, and they typically met Cady there. Which is why they weren't surprised to see them locking lips, despite their usual desire to hide from Regina. It occurred to Janis and Damian that the two were starting to get comfortable with not getting caught, so they were becoming more careless.

"You know," Janis's words startled the two of them as they jumped apart from each other. The action caused Janis to smirk as Damian snickered at the two. "If you two continue to make out one of the biggest make-out corners, Regina is definitely going to find you two. Eventually, you're not going to get saved by Damian and me. So, stop being stupid, and find a less obvious make-out spot. Come on, Cady, we're going to be late."

Damian quirked his brow nosily at the two as he looked over (Y/n) before following Janis to their class. "She's kind of right," Cady said, her cheeks a bright shade of red having been caught for the fourth time by Janis and Damian that week. "We're getting careless, and if we don't want Regina to find out, we need to start doing better." She spoke with a type of seriousness in her voice that caused (Y/n) to smile. "Why are you looking at me like that?" Cady questioned, though due to the look (Y/n) gave, she had a hint as to what (Y/n) had running through her mind.

"Oh, nothing," (Y/n) teased before placing a gentle kiss on Cady's lips. Cady reciprocated easily, almost forgetting about just getting caught, and the fact that Janis and Damian were most likely waiting on the top of the stairs for her. "I just think you're cute when you're serious about things. You puff your cheeks out and narrow your eyes slightly, and you just look so determined. Anyways, see you after class, Brainiac. I love you."

(Y/n) kissed Cady's cheek as she exited the stairwell, leaving behind a very smiley Cady to join her very annoyed best friends. "I'm sick of these shenanigans, Cady. When are you just going to tell Regina to truth? She's gotten much nicer since you overthrew her at the Spring Fling. Well, I guess, we all overthrew her." Damian pondered on this, walking into the classroom and sitting in his usual seat beside Janis. Cady had turned her seat towards her friends, who were expecting an answer from her.

"She retook the crown, remember? She has too much pride to really learn a lesson. And, even if she is nicer, you both know how she is when it comes to (Y/n)." Cady reminded the group with a raised brow. She didn't necessarily want to talk about this. Every time they got into it, it was them trying to convince Cady to come clean, but that wasn't something (Y/n) wanted. "Besides, right now, (Y/n) also doesn't want to tell Regina, and I think it's important to make sure I don't just ignore her wants. I feel the same as her, too. I'm not ready for Regina to know."

Janis rolled her eyes as the teacher entered, disrupting their conversation. It was getting harder for her and Damian to divert the Plastics away from their usual make-out spots and to make up excuses. Janis and Damian were incredibly loyal, so they weren't just going to stop helping them, but at this point, the two of them needed to buck up and just talk to Regina.

After class, Cady met with (Y/n) for their shared free period, where they went to one of their usual spots. Janis knew where they were, and that's why she almost gave herself whiplash when she saw Regina headed in that direction. "Regina, you can't go that way. I think they're going construction or something." Janis blurted, knowing her excuse was horrible, but it was the only thing to come to mind at the time. And it was obvious that Regina didn't buy it.

"Oh, sure, Janis, they're doing construction on the hallway." Regina narrowed her eyes, wondering just how stupid Janis thought she was. She couldn't help but also feel annoyed at Janis's presence since she was trying to keep her from something. "I need something from my locker."

As Regina turned the corner, her eyes widened at Cady and (Y/n) tucked in a doorway, hidden from the view of most people. It wouldn't phase her if they weren't kissing each other to the point where both she and Janis were wondering if they could breathe. "What the fuck is going on here?" Regina crossed her arms. She hated when people didn't keep her in the loop almost as much as she hated seeing her younger sister kissing one of her friends. She felt slightly betrayed by both but was willing to hear out an explanation if it was good enough.

(Y/n) pulled away from Cady in shock before looking over to the strawberry blonde. "Regina, I'm sorry. I didn't want to tell you like this…" She whispered out, looking at her shoes and rubbing her arm in disappointment. She never did well with hiding things from her sister. Cady noticed this as she placed a comforting hand on her arm. "Cady and I have been dating since the Spring Fling, we just didn't know how to tell you. Don't be mad at her, it was my decision to keep it a secret." (Y/n) explained, though the decision was mutual. She just didn't want Regina to be even more upset with Cady than she might be.

"I'm more upset that you two kept it a secret." Regina examined her sister. She always had a soft spot for (Y/n), and seeing her sister feel ashamed of herself made her feel a little bad. "I can forgive that you two kept it a secret as long as you two agree to not make out in spaces I might be in."

This was the closest to an approval that (Y/n) was going to get. Looking up with a smile, she hugged Regina happily. "Okay, deal," she said as her sister patted her back gently, narrowing her eyes at Cady briefly. The strawberry blonde looked sheepish before glancing away to avoid eye contact. Regina nodded at the fear she still instilled before releasing her sister. It was a bit weird to see them together, but it was nothing she couldn't get used to as she walked off to her locker.

"I told you two that you were going to get caught." Janis had her arms crossed with a small smirk. Saluting them gently, she turned back to return to the art studio that she was spending too much time away from.

[angelfandomfan]

note: I think i will start writting maybe a little thing Warnings: Bad english (because i'm french and it's my first time writting a story IN ENGLISH), blood, maybe death, kidnapping mention yay, weak ALSO, IF SOMEONE WANT ME TO WRITE SOMETHING ELSE- ASK MEH

Yandere!hunter X monster reader -----------------------------------------------

It is a story about a big scary monster that lived in the woods, a monster that had three eyes and wings that looked like demon's wings, the monster eats children! Says the old woman, some peoples belived for this story; and you did. Before being turned into one.. Before, you were a beautiful lady, with a lot of ease in your life, you had enough money to live easily, you were kind to everyone.. helped everyone.. before knowing that they were just using you- Just because THEY were lazy, the day you turned into a monster is when you helped an old lady and you suspected her to be a witch because of course she was showing some clues and when you hold here hand to help her, you got an huge pain and you just turned into a monster, so you just ran into a forest. And now that peoples saw YOU in your monster form, they were scared, so scared that now they engaged a hunter to kill you! TO KILL YOU! SERIOUSLY!! The so called hunter, you heard from eavesdropping was called Lucian, and he was now tracking you in the woods, you had before a lot of hunters that tried to kill you but they all died because of their own traps or because you pushed them on a trap because you were doing self defence, and people just won't understand! You had to suffer because of THEM, OF. SIMPLE. VILLAGERS.

You really were angry at them, but you couldn't do anything because YOU are the so called monster, but why, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SUFFER?, YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. So, to calm yourself you decided to go toward a lake and to drink in it, but why? Because now that you turned into a "monster" you could now drink water directly from the lake, and also because you were a part deer, that crazy right? you had antlers. FUCKING. ANTLERS.

At first you were scared, to find out that you had antlers, but now.. not really like you got used to it. So now let talk about Lucian Lucian, is a tall, muscular guy and he's also a serious person, you also tried to stalk him a little but you don't know how but he always manage to find you, but you always run away before he could do anything. Lucian, him was dumbfounded (or dump, idk) the first moment he saw you, oh gosh you were so beautiful, a beautiful skin and eyes, oh gosh he just want you.. to possess you.. just for him. He doesn't care that the villagers will be mad at him, he just want you.

The first time he met you, he was walking through the woods to hunt you with his crossbow and when he saw a sort of deer on two legs he aimed it and then shot, but then the moment he shot he saw your visage, your beautiful face. Oh gosh he was so sorry that he hurted you with an arrow of his crossbow, if he knew and saw your face before shooting, you wouldn't been hurt.

YOU WOULDN'T BEEN HURT.

YOU WOULDN'T BEEN HURT.

YOU WOULDN'T BEEN HURT.

YOU WOULDN'T BEEN HURT.

YOU WOULDN'T BEEN HURT.

YOU WOULDN'T BEEN HURT.

And he kept saying this to his mind until he finally stops, you were bleeding because of him.

And so Lucian kept stalking you, over and over just to know more about you. He was scared to scare you if he tried to talk to you, so he was just stalking you, and he liked when YOU were stalking him, oh gosh it was so cute. And he decided to give you food everydays, again and again, until you finally start eating the food he was giving you, on a plate, and little by little he was getting closer to you, before he was 15 metters from you, then 10, then 5 then 2, then 1. Oh gosh, he really liked to be SO close from you, and that you didn't run away, little did you know that he was feeding you something that was making you weaker every days you were eating the food, you were feeling weak, and Lucian just told you that you were maybe not digesting at all because you didn't eating this food long time ago. But that in reality, Lucian was making you weak only to be able to kidnap you with you that won't be able to escape. So he did this, the day where you were finally extremelly weak, he picked you up and started walking away with you, oh gosh you were going to be with him forever. "You will never be able to escape me, my little deer~"

[gartenofbanny]

I believe Mammon is basic and boring as a Sin and Antagonist in Helluva Boss. But in a series where a portion of the villains are just one-note, Mammon is a really really special case to me.

Mammon is one of the Seven Deadly Sins, and Helluva Boss tends to put their own unique twist regarding them for better or for worse. It really just depends on your preference.

Lucifer, despite being the Prince of Pride, loves his daughter Charlie and his wife, Lilith, presumably putting his family first before himself. Asmodeus, despite being the Sin of Lust, is in a healthy relationship with a Demon that isn't a succubus. Lastly, Beelzebub who, despite being the Sin of Gluttony, was worried about Blitzo's emotional state after he downed an entire gallon of the alcoholic beverage she likely made. Despite embodying sins, these characters moreso embody the more positive aspect of them, which again is for better or worse depending on your preference.

And then there's Mammon. He's the Sin of Greed, and for some reason, he's the only Sin who embodies the Sinful aspect of greediness. Asmodeus proclaims that Mammon has always been like this since the "start of Hell" meaning he has always been a greedy asshole and will always be a greedy asshole because that's what he is.

Excuse my french, but what a lazy ass character Mammon is.

The reason I've really decided to make this post is because a friend sent me a scene from Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood. I haven't watched the anime, but this scene, in particular, really opened my eyes to how the Greediness isn't just about money. How Greed like the other sins have Virtues to them.

Now I'm not expecting Helluva Boss to have FMA: Brotherhood level of writing, but I will ask this. If Vivziepop is able to portray the sin of Lust and Gluttony in complex or somewhat redeemable lights, then why not do so for the Sin of Greed?

This series took the most basic understanding of Greed and just made an antagonist out of it, and that's really why Mammon feels very basic to me. It doesn't feel as if much thought was put into him compared to Asmodeus and Beelzebub.

Mammon is evil because he's greedy and he wants money, so he exploits his cash clown for cash. Now, if he was the only antagonist like that, I wouldn't care, but Stella and Crimson are two villains in Helluva Boss who have basic ass motives with no cause behind them. Stella is a dick to Stolas and wants to abuse him just because. Crimson is a bad father towards Moxxie and treats him like shit..just because (I thought mafias were all about family)

How can I take Mammon as a serious villain when he's just like Crimson and Stella? Well, at least in terms of voice acting and design, he's unique, but in terms of character motivation and writing. Mammon isn't it.

However, critics and fans alike, if you think otherwise, I'd love to read them.

Anyway, thank you all for reading, and I hope you all have a nice day! ❤️

[etoilesbienne]

Forever's Entire Proposal to BadBoyHalo q!BBH Analysis + Transcript below the cut.

Before I start, I want to make clear this is from BBH's perspective + mentality, and I do not speak Portuguese, as well as none of this is intended as character writing criticism. I really like the direction both of these characters are going in, I just want to highlight how much of a horror show this scene is! I'm starting much earlier than what's shown in the clip at the top, unfortunately Tumblr's file limits exist :/ Timestamp for the entire clip I'm using is at here in BBH's vod.

Some preface for everything going on in this scene and context:

For one, Forever's current drugged arc has continued references to the Vargas Era in Brazilian history, which, to heavily oversimplify, is a period when culture was suppressed by Getúlio Vargas, a 1930's Brazilian dictator, and made to look very perfected to the outside world to cover up the many issues from the government at the time. (I really recommend looking more into the Vargas Era on your own, I can say I've found every reading on this topic to be both interesting, as well as gives Forever's current arc a really good layer of historical reference with his presidency. It's a good topic to look into!)

Mostly, it's a representation of how fucked Forever's mental state currently is. Not only is he erratic from the drugs he was put under - He's actively been washed over with nationalistic propaganda. That's fucking horrifying for the President of the island to be under! It gains another layer of horror as well, because to all of the islanders, Forever is the only community member with any perceived sort of power. Him becoming erratic - pulling a gun on Phil, forcing other people to sign up for the drugs and medical procedure he went under - it's something that carries weight in terms of the island being united and working together, and is currently reinforcing the concerns the French group had with seeing him as unfit for power, with BBH included in all of these presidential coup meetings as being a sort of "honorary french" deal.

On Bad's side, however, is the known fact he finds marriage overrated, and meta-wise cc!BBH has mentioned he's playing a "more aromantic approach" because he doesn't want to be another character stuck in the shipping boat. (This isn't a knock against shipping, I just think it's good knowledge to have about q!BBH's character/stance on romance going into this.) And then finally, when the link timestamp starts, but before Forever has truly begun his serious conversation, BBH does this:

He switches out his regular Totem of Undying to specifically a Death totem. It's very quick, but I think it sets up his mentality going into this... I think he expected Forever's final reaction.

Forever: Here, Bad. BadBoyHalo: Hello. F: Hello! F & BBH, simultaneously: So, uh - BBH: Do you know where any of the kids are? F: I know where Richarlyson is, but, oh uh maybe we should go a little bit further there's a translator screen. BBH: Okay. F: Otherwise, I want my chat to know what we're talking about.

[Break for when they move the benches again]

F: Here, nice, nice, nice. F: OH! It's even better! BBH: Yay. F: It's perfect, I would say! BBH: So, you don't - F: Yeah, I don't know where the eggs are, Bad, but I'm really - there's something I know, okay? BBH: Uh-huh. F: I can tell you. BBH: Tell me. F: They are just good and fine, okay? BBH: What do you mean? F: They're fine! They're well! BBH: Look, what do you want, Forever? F: Ah, I want to get married! BBH: No, I mean, like, what do you want? F: Why? BBH: Like, if you know what happened to the - F: Why… don't we just get married! BBH: Do you know what happened to the eggs? Do you know where they are? F: Let's get married. BBH: What's happening, Forever? Etoiles: [mumbling] Fit: Hooray. Tina: Hip Hip Hooray! F: Let's - Let's just get married. Fit: Hooray. Tina: Hip Hip Hooray! Fit: Hooray. Wooooooo. Tina: He saved us. That's crazy! BBH: Okay. Oh, hey Etoiles. You - You're not focused, Forever. Tina: It's probably the most beautiful battle ever! Of all time! In a rose field! F: Yeah, I'm totally focused! I'm happy! Etoiles: Thank you, Tina! Tina: Yes! BBH: No - No, you're focused on the wrong thing - Etoiles: You see, I clicked well! I clicked well! F: Guys, can you give me and Bad a moment, please? - Tina: [Overlapping with Forever] I'm so sorry - F: - We are having a deep conversation, I am asking him to get married! Tina: - I'm so sorry Mr. President, I didn't know. Etoiles: Okay! Okay, Forever, what I, Forever, I - I don't understand, like, there's the code who's attacking us, and you don't give a shit, but you are the president? F: Where - Where is the codes? I want to help you guys! Everything will be perfect! Tell me. Pierre: Congratulations Badboy and Mr. President, congratulations F: If the codes are not here right now, Etoiles, you are just being inconvenient, because I want to get married, and you are just in the way, man - Etoiles: Okay - F: - Go away, please! Etoiles: Okay, okay, I will go away. Okay, okay. F: If the codes show up, you will tell me, okay? BBH: [short confused laugh] F: [cheering as Etoiles walks away] YES! BBH: [looking around at the sky] F: See, Bad? This is how we solve problems. Isn't that perfect? Pierre: Can I be your best man for the wedding? BBH: What? No? There's not gonna be a wedding - F: He asks me for drugs all the time, Bad, he just asks me for drugs. BBH: - okay? F: [laughing] Pierre: Huh? BBH: He's obviously not in his right mind, AyPierre. Pierre: Yes, look at this smile! Must use a lot of uh… BBH: A smile doesn't mean a whole lot. F: Pierre, I will, I will tell Cucurucho, man, I told you already. Pierre: Yes, I want to be happy… F: Cucurucho will come to you and he will put the smile on your face! Pierre: Yes! F: Now go away, I want to get married. Pierre: I want it! F: (Portuguese as Pierre leaves) F: Oh my god, finally some silence. So Bad, BBH: mhm. F: Don't you think this place looks beautiful? BBH: I guess. F: Oh my god, they're still around so the translator is just crazy. Let's change it again please. Sorry, but - F: (Portuguese, I am assuming it is more ooc focused, my apologies. If I'm wrong, feel free to correct me!)

[Break for when they move locations, this is where the clip above begins.]

F: So Bad, BBH: Yes? F: What is it going to be? Are you going to get married, or not? BBH: Why do you want to get married? F: Yeah, because everything's perfect, right? A marriage would be perfect, as well! BBH: Why do you think everything's perfect? F: Why don't you think everything's perfect? BBH: Because we don't have our kids, Forever. They're gone. F: No, no they're just fine, man! You are not seeing the world the way you should, Bad, and I'm going to tell you - BBH: How should I be seeing it? F: I'm here for you, buddy. I'm here for you, buddy, okay? BBH: Is anyone here for you? F: And I'm going to tell Cucurucho that he should help you! Like he did to me. BBH: I don't want his help. F: You need his help, Bad. Just - BBH: I don't need his help, Forever. F: - Bad, you are looking bad, Bad, - BBH: I feel fine. F: - you know? BBH: You know what would help me, Forever? F: So let's get married! BBH: Forever. You know what would help me? F: Hm? What? BBH: Tell that white puffball to give me my son back. To bring back all of our kids. F: White puffball? What does that mean? BBH: Cucurucho. F: Okay. BBH: What does he want? What does he want, Forever? Does he want diamonds? F: Why do you think Cucurucho is the one with the eggs? Why do you think Cucurucho is the one with your child? BBH: I know it was him, Forever. F: What are you guys getting from exploding the whole city? Why did I become the president that's trying to help everyone, and you guys are just exploding everything? This is funny man, this is perfect. [laughs] You know? You guys are just too crazy! [laughs] Man, you guys are exploding stuff, and you all are saying that I need help? [laughs] That's funny, man, that's funny! BBH: We need our kids back, Forever. That's why. We'll stop, all Cucurucho has to do is return the eggs. I want Dapper back, I want Pomme back, all the kids back. F: Why do you think Cucurucho is the one with the eggs? BBH: He obviously is the one with the eggs, okay? F: What proof do you have? BBH: Remember - F: Cucurucho's great, Bad. BBH: - I saw - F: Uh huh. BBH: - It was a strange person in the federation building, Mysterioso or whatever his name was? F: [laughs] Yeah, he doesn't like [I cannot figure out what he says here] BBH: I saw him at the federation building. I bet that's the same person who gave Sofia's plans to Maximus. F: [laughing] BBH: That means the Federation was responsible for Sofia. F: Okay, okay. BBH: That means they're behind everything! There's not anything they don't know about. F: Did Maximus tell you that that man is the same one that gave Sofia to him. BBH: He said it was a mysterious hooded figure, and there's only one - F: There's only - Can only be one - BBH: - mysterious hooded figure. F: - It can only be one. BBH: If the federation does not - did not take the kids, they know who did, and they know where they are - F: Ohh. BBH: - I just want them back, that's it. F: Yeah.

BBH: What do they want - What do they want, Forever? Mr. President? You're in contact with them, what do they want? F: Well, Bad, I can tell you something, you know? This is actually quite funny, this is actually quite funny. BBH: What's funny about it? F: So everyone on the island thinks that I, being the president - me, being the president - means that I'm working for the Federation, but do you know what you guys don't see? BBH: What? F: I am the only one working for you guys! A favor(?), you know, the federation does what they want. I'm the only one that tried to represent the people of the island. BBH: So you're trying to get our kids back? F: Oh, they're just fine right now. BBH: Where are they? F: I don't know, sleeping maybe? BBH: How do you they're fine? F: Cucurucho said it's classified! Isn't that funny? BBH: Do you believe it? F: That it's classified? I don't know, is there anything to believe in that? BBH: [sighs] BBH: What happened to you, Forever? F: What? BBH: What happened to you? What did they do to you? F: Uh, I don't know what you're talking about, Bad. I'm just feeling so good, 'cuz everything's so good man. BBH: This isn't like you. You're not acting like yourself. F: Why? Why, I'm happy? I'm not happy? You say I'm not a happy person? BBH: That's just it Forever, you wouldn't be this happy with Richarlyson missing. F: Richarlyson's okay, he's just - BBH: Is he? Is he? F: - sleeping a lot. BBH: Has he gotten up? Has he danced around? Has he put any signs down? Has he said anything to you? Have you built any projects with him recently? Have you done anything with him at all? F: [Deep sigh that turns into a laugh] No, no. BBH: Then how is he fine? F: [long pause] Bad, I have something I would like to show you. Or maybe test on you. BBH: What? F: You know, you guys are just so funny with that clock joke. BBH: Clock joke? F: Yeah, I want to test something. F: Don't you want to get married? BBH: I want my son back. I want Dapper, Pomme, F: [begins launching mines] BBH: [evades, throws health potions] F: STOP THAT FUCKING CLOCK NOISE. BBH: You like your mines, Forever? BBH: It won't bring Richarlyson back.

To start from the beginning, BBH is under no pretenses that this would be a marriage proposal of all things. All he is aware of is that Forever wants to have a serious discussion with him. He's also gone out of his way to put himself on a Death totem, meaning he has every possibility to be downed if Forever were to successfully attack him.

With Forever's current mental state and reinforcing a societal idealism & a desired performance of aggressive happiness and "normalcy" - his character now desiring something like a marriage can be read multiple ways. For one, an imitation of how one of his closest friends, his ex-husband no less, was recently married and is currently considered one of the best federation workers (albeit begrudging on Cellbit's part). For two, a marriage is a pretty huge symbol of a plastique performance of a perfect life. Especially in this context, it's saccharine, it's a status symbol, everyone wants it. With the medication as well, we don't truly know if Forever genuinely feels strongly about BBH to want to marry him, or if he feels he has to be in a marriage for a "perfect" life with BBH being "the best option" as a spouse. (Again, this is not a criticism of Forever's character, this is a very symbolically rich move for him to do, and I, personally, cannot get enough of it.)

Now back to BBH, this is a guy who is admittedly not looking for romance, not trying to romance anyone, and is currently in the middle of a character arc having to do with how pissed he is at Forever for not running the government in a way he approves, and then getting wrongfully jailed by Forever. I do not think BBH is in any way afraid of Forever as a person, but I do think BBH has concerns about what he may be forced to do in an attempt to get his children back. BBH as a character in general has very, very little regard for his own life, watch a pov of himself in a dungeon and just see how many totems pop, but he does care about his kids more than anything else in the world. The way his character goes about his care for his kids isn't something that often occurs in more masculine-presented characters like him either, frankly I think a lot of more ship oriented readings of him end up hyper-feminizing him* because of this "maternal" archetype.

In a return to Forever's saccharine performance of perfectionism, I find the moments Forever makes the both of them move across the rose field - The rose field, previously quite literally stained by blood as Etoiles had just finished another battle with the code there, tensions are running high and everyone is still distressed from the eggs going missing - I realize it's because cc!Forever ooc wanted to move to not have the chatbox be interrupted by other people speaking, but it's just so good thematically. He keeps moving to have a better view of roses. It's never perfect enough. They have to keep moving. They have to be alone. Nobody else is allowed to be around when he corners BBH with the marriage proposal. Nobody can get in the way.

Speaking of people interrupting, the other members appearing in the middle of the conversation adds to the fridge horror that's been subtly happening all the way through. Nobody pauses and makes sure BBH is okay throughout this scene, everybody is extremely sure that he is fine and can handle himself. The only person to even make a criticism of Forever is Etoiles, over being somewhat irritated that it looks like Forever has been doing little to nothing as President to aid new members or former islanders (despite this technically not being true, Etoiles has seen none of it, and has been giving new players items continuously in an effort to help them, as well as has had little time to do anything except fight code entities).

And then onto the rejection, BBH never agrees to the marriage at all, because why would he? I've seen quite a lot of discussion thus far that he doesn't reject Forever outright, but I disagree, it's a little moment in there, and I couldn't get it in the video posted itself, but he explicitly tells Pierre "there's not gonna be a wedding," and then is cut off by Forever. It's quiet, I don't think many people heard it outright, but BBH is right in his assertion Forever isn't in his right mind to be asking for marriage in the first place.

The other side of that, however, is that BBH is very well aware Forever didn't want to hear an outright rejection either. BBH knows what Forever is capable of, and he knows this version of Forever is not his usual self. It's not an easy situation, especially when he's fully under the impression Forever does have some power with the Federation, and fully believes the Federation has the eggs. Whether or not this is actually true doesn't really matter to Bad's perspective here, he's deadset in this belief. With that belief in mind, how is someone supposed to respond to being cornered about marriage - a concept he has little interest in - but the person cornering him is 1. known to be volatile due to recent events, 2. potentially has some form of contact to the people currently holding the eggs captive, and potentially put his children more at risk than they already are, 3. the literal only person in power on the island.

I don't think BBH ever believed he had the option to outright tell Forever no, he's in a depressed state as is, his kids might be dead for all he knows, and he has the impression Forever could bring harm to them.

Admittedly it is interesting how many outright untrue facts BBH holds onto, but cannot change his belief in them. His opinion and perspective of Forever is one thing, but it's much, much more obvious when he brings up the connection between the new Mysterioso and the previous masked person who gave the plans for Sofia to Maxo, those were two separate unknown figures as we know as the audience, but Bad does not know this, and does make assumptions and connect dots in his own right, tending to his own detriment. This is all intended here, he's wrong about Forever factually, but to his knowledge he's acting in the best way he can. He's under the impression Forever is just not telling the full truth to him about everything with the eggs disappearing, and believes the federation is lying. I think it's made even more obvious he's prioritizing the eggs over everything else here, especially with his final statement about Richarlyson. BBH believes the eggs are the only true way to every player's heart, and blatantly ignores the actual romance aspect of what marriage implies, because romance genuinely does not matter to him at all. He doesn't have time to worry about being in a relationship if his son might be dead.

Mostly, I find this scene to be a great relationship horror set up, because damn if I haven't been on dates like this, where I feel like I can't say no or something might happen. I understand the paranoia and anxiety surrounding q!BBH's mindset in the moment. It isn't a rational response by any means, no, but it is a very aggressively human response to this situation for a demon to have.

Basically, I don't think BBH is a fundamentally romantic character in the first place, nor do I think he'd ever be happy in a cutesy marriage position anyway, he never once responds romantically to any of this, and solely prioritizes the eggs, the final Richarlyson line cements this fact. It's not a dig at how Forever will never have BBH romantically - it's a dig at Forever based on what BBH's priority is, his kids.

*I want to be clear this statement is meant to be a neutral fact, it's just worth mentioning in an analysis like this that BBH as a character is more typically set on the feminine side by the fanbase, and how his character's interpretations are influenced by that reading.

[mellosdrawings]

SOME👏PEOPLE👏ON👏THIS👏INTERNET👏NEED👏TO👏TURN👏THEIR👏AUTOCORRECT👏BACK👏ON👏BC👏THEY👏DID👏NOT👏PASS👏MIDDLE👏SCHOOL👏ENGLISH👏AND👏IT👏SHOWS

obviously this excludes non-english speakers I forgive y'all but if I see another writer put dialog in their comic using B-R-E-A-T-H instead of B-R-E-A-T-H-E or vice versa I am going to S-C-R-E-A-M

(Just a little rant bc I am sick of it and I feel like I can rant to you)

Darling, dont be like that :') Some people aren't native English speakers, some people have dyslexia, some people just have a hard time focusing when they write, etc.

I'm happy you trust me to rant <3 But I check both cases here, maybe even the dyslexia tho I never got screened for it haha. I know I make a lot of mistakes in my posts (and even in French. Gods you should see me write, it's a mess. All letters are here uh. Just. That's a funny order isn't it?)

When you see bad writing just... take a breath (see what I did? lol) Either politely point it out to the person who wrote it or just move on.

I get that bad grammar can irk some people up but it's really not that serious in the end :3

(Not trying to be moralizing here, you really just asked someone who has problems writing too so uh... :'D)