#I'm not mentally prepared for episode 7

[0-enimelody-0]

Despite their relatively small size, lakes can still hide secrets within their depths.

From the remains of a once prosper civilization,

To the results of the morbid curiousity of mankind.

With this information we have to remember one thing:

.

.

.

Matter cannot be destroyed

No matter how hard you try

It will just morph into something else

I remember vividly seeing that one teaser picture for episode 4 and wanting to draw it badly, but never having the motivation to do so.

BUT I FINALLY DREW IT

(I also just noticed that that teaser was an obvious Friday The 13th reference)

HOPE Y'ALL ENJOY THIS PIECE

(And wish y'all good luck with episode 7)

[egophiliac]

You think this will be THE last update for book 7.. or will there be more chapters q-q. (I'm totally not desperate for book 8 HAHHA)

I think we're gonna get at least one more chapter where we wrap back around to the Diasomnia boys (I have THEORIES!!!!), but I think 13 will probably be the last one! maybe also 14 as a short epilogue/setup for episode 8, depending on where they cut after we deal with Malleus. we are definitely approaching the endgame though! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ the party is almost assembled...the light is at the end of the tunnel...it is almost time to go throw pies into Tsunotarou's silly face until he comes to his senses...

(disclaimer since I don't think they've actually officially confirmed that there's going to be an episode 8, that this is of course just me assuming that Grim's arc/whatever's going on with Crowley probably/various other wrapups are going to be a separate episode, and aren't gonna be folded into the absolute beast that has been episode 7. BUT it does make for a nice break point and makes sense thematically with Ramshackle being, like, the semi-official 8th dorm and all, so I think it's a pretty safe bet at this point!)

[themattress]

The Dragon Prince's Biggest Flaw

Now that I've finished Season 7 (the end of the Mystery of Aaravos arc and quite possibly the series if they don't get a three season renewal), I once again must reaffirm the biggest albatross around The Dragon Prince's neck. It's not the lore and worldbuilding so reliant on side material, or the never-ending Avatar: The Last Airbender references, or the inconsistent animation quality, or the tonal whiplashes, or the sketchy pacing that results from all seasons being only 9 episodes long. It's the fact that while most of the heroes are likable enough, their conflicts aren't as interesting or satisfying as the villains' at best, and their goals and beliefs are downright not preferable to the villains' at worst. And this season highlighted that again!

Callum doesn't end up going dark or dying despite all the build-up, Rayla gets closure with her biological parents and then gets to have her adoptive parents back and status back and doesn't end up needing to kill Callum, Ezran is pulled back from his tyrannical path by Aanya and forgives those he was angry at, Runaan is among those forgiven and gets to find out he didn't kill King Harrow after all, Soren doesn't have to find out troubling truths of his past or confront the mother who abandoned him or have to kill his sister, Terry keeps his innocence and doesn't have to be burdened by Claudia dying, Lujanne doesn't die, and Janai doesn't end up needing to make the hard choice of executing her brother. The only sacrifice made by a hero is by Zubela, who at least gets to be with her husband in death and tell her son she loves him before dying, with said son appearing to be just fine afterward. Ezran practically boasts about how nobody had to sacrifice anything in the end despite having prepared to!

Meanwhile, Claudia loses her innocence, her brother, much of her mental health, her leg, her biological father, her boyfriend, her adoptive father, and if I'm reading it right even her humanity. Viren gave up everything to atone for his sins and died a painful and lonely death as he reiterated that he's "a servant", as if his problem was that he didn't "know his place" and dared to want more rather than his actual heinous actions in the pursuit of what he thought was justified. Aaravos lost his biological daughter, spent countless years crying over it, spent countless more years imprisoned, and now he has been temporarily killed and separated from his adoptive daughter in the process. (Oh, and Karim was squished to death, but fuck that guy). The villains actually lose things, they actually have to make sacrifices to achieve what they want! This makes them more compelling than the heroes, even if their aims aren't always on the morally up and up...but this season screws up that caveat as well!

Not only is Aaravos' plan at worst something that will create hardships that are perfectly endurable, but at best it's something morally justified because it strips power from a cosmic order that we have been shown is corrupt, composed of self-righteous bigots who will execute a child for daring to share magic with a race they deem inferior and unworthy of it. While the heroes want to create a better world, their solution doesn't address the root causes for the problems in any meaningful way. It's supposed to be framed as them acknowledging the hurt but moving on from in rather than let it bind them to the past, but that only works with the Karim plotline. Aaravos not moving beyond his hurt isn't binding him to the past, it's making him fight for a future where such cosmic atrocities can't be inflicted again...and more to the point, it's making him fight for a reality where his child's unjust execution isn't rendered meaningless. He refuses to accept "bad shit happens and we all just have to move on" when the ones making the bad shit happen move on without paying a damn consequence for their actions. And he isn't even a hypocrite about it: he knows he's also doing bad shit, and that's why he plans to die at the end! He can be with his daughter and his victims can have justice.

Meanwhile, this season is full of heroes also doing bad shit that they justify as for the best, with the difference being they have no self-awareness about it and, as said before, pay no sacrifices for it. From Callum trying to use dark magic and commit the very kind of vile act Viren was demonized for, to Rayla betraying her allies by breaking a rightfully convicted criminal out of prison, to Ezran going full Oppenheimer with the creation of a dangerous new weapon....and, perhaps worst of all, Soren, Terry and co. magically disguising Lujanne as Claudia's long-lost mother in an attempt to trick her into standing down from helping Aaravos. Yes, to get her away from Aaravos they resorted to something far more underhanded and manipulative than anything Aaravos ever tried with her. Why should I root for these guys!?

Honestly, I think if there is one scene that perfectly encapsulates the problem, it's Terry's big Heel Face Turn moment. Aaravos tells Terry the whole dark truth with the explicit purpose of helping him grow and helping him and Claudia be a better couple by putting them on equal ground with one another. And the words he says to Terry in this scene are absolutely correct:

"The true heart is a gift of childhood. For a few wonder-filled years, we each have innocent eyes to experience the world's beauty, in a simple way. Terrestrius, you were lucky. You held that innocent want for longer than most. I have seen generations of humans and elves accept the darkness that lurks in all of us beside the light. There is no black and white, only shades of gray. We must all carry complexity. But please, believe me: that there is beauty in this burden. Your heart will be a little heavier, but now there will be no more half-truths, Terrestrius. We will do what must be done."

All of this is right! Note that Aaravos isn't saying you have to discard your inner child or the good qualities it grants you completely. He is simply saying the truth that you cannot stay in a childlike state of being forever, you must also be willing to acknowledge and accept the darker parts of the world, of human nature, of yourself. If not, you can't do what you must.

But rather than do that and work through things with Claudia, Terry totally backtracks on his pledge last season that he'll never leave her and will always stand with her, all because he is scared of having to grow up and lose his innocence, to take the black with the white and see things in shades of gray, to work toward something bigger than himself that requires him to step outside his comfort zone. And it all feels so phony and unjustified, for three reasons:

- 1. First of all, he killed a man. Does anybody else remember that? He killed Ibis from behind in his third appearance in order to protect Claudia. After that he helped take and hold Soren as a hostage, steal a map from a dragon's tooth, and actively assist in releasing Aaravos despite even his own apprehensions about it. Claudia killing Sir Sparklepuff didn't seem to phase him all that much either. So the notion that he still has his innocence in tact and hasn't lost it already feels like narrative gaslighting. The breaking point being Claudia lying to him and using him (even though just talking to her deeply about it would reveal that Aaravos told her to, since again his plan was to break his innocence once it served its purpose so that he and Claudia could be equals in a better relationship) makes him feel selfish, especially given that he knows about Claudia's abandonment issues and how it will feel if another loved one walks out on her, this time after having sworn not to do so and even staying with her after she left him specifically to avoid this scenario! I'm having trouble feeling sympathy for him here.

- 2. Secondly, even if we accept his decision to leave, why couldn't he just stay on his own and take care of the birds? I mean, he could have stayed with Aaravos and Claudia and just taken the birds with him, but if he really felt he needed to split, why join their enemies? Why go out of his way to side with the people working against Claudia just as Soren had done, once again making her feel betrayed in the process? The justification that he's doing it with the assurance that Claudia won't be harmed doesn't hold water, since one of his new buddies almost kills her later and then shortly after that Soren starts talking about how she's too far gone and may need to die. Did I mention that both of those happen after they try to deceive Claudia with a fake version of her long-lost mother? Which leads to the third and final point...

- 3. Yeah, instead of just going and finding his and Claudia's mother even if it made him uncomfortable, Soren, along with Terry, Corvus, Lujanne and Allen, decided to use a magic spell to disguise Lujanne as her and have her play out an emotional reunion with a vulnerable Claudia in order to manipulate her into leaving Aaravos. When leaving her, Terry said to Claudia "You didn't trust me to make my own choice! You used me! It's not how you treat someone you love...it's not how you treat any person! And if I let you treat me that way, I'm not sure I can really be me anymore!" Yet here he is, not trusting Claudia to make her own choice and using her despite loving her. Is THAT you, Terry? Or have you changed into someone you don't even like, which was your reasoning for not staying with Claudia? Either way, you've blown up your entire rationale. You're just as morally gray as Aaravos and Claudia, except unlike them you lack the maturity to own it, preferring to stay a man-child.

And that's the show's fatal flaw in a nutshell. It wants to be morally complex, except it also doesn't want the heroes to actually embrace their own moral complexity and suffer the consequences that comes with it, which ends up turning them into pious hypocrites who can't acknowledge their hypocrisy or that the villains might have a point with what they're seeking to achieve, who breeze through the show unscathed while the villains actually have to suffer for fighting for what they believe in. It wants to be Avatar: The Last Airbender, but instead it's as if Monk Gyatso was revealed to still be alive and reunited with Aang, if Katara got closure with her mother's spirit, if Yue attempted to sacrifice herself but then the problem is solved differently so she gets to live happily ever after with Sokka, or if Zuko got his scar healed....by Azula no less, who then still goes on to suffer a mental breakdown anyway. Actually, let me rephrase it: she suffers a mental breakdown after she gets scarred herself!

If a third arc happens, I'll watch it if I hear good things about it. But until then....

[airenyah]

A LOOK AT STYLE'S JOURNEY | Ep 7

(Overview | Ep1+2 | Ep3 | Ep4 | Ep5 | Ep6 | Ep8 | Ep9)

Hi y'all, this is the longest one yet. Don't ask me how much sleep I've been getting. And don't ask me about how my uni assignments are going. Or the studying for any exams. You don't wanna know.

ENJOY <3

Disclaimer: I just want to remind everyone that I am not a Thai native speaker and also in no way fluent yet (I'm roughly at B1/B2 level). There is a whoooole lot of language stuff in this meta and I didn't double check every single thing with native speakers because I didn't wanna overwhelm anyone with the number of questions, even though I already split my questions between three different people. That's how much language stuff I've packed in here this time. Oops. (There may be mistakes. I'm open to corrections.)

Pronoun situation: As usual, just assume Fadel and Style use the rude pronouns guu/mueng with each other unless I specify otherwise.

To recap: When we last left Style he was absolutely stoked to have his boyfriend back. Fadel even confessed his love to Style, and while Fadel was acting a little weird, things were mostly all good, right? Nothing to worry about, thinks Style...

No. 1: How to Clean Your Boyfriend's Face

We start the episode with Style actually doing his (real) job for once, which is nice for a change, because I don't think we saw him actually working on a car ever since he started flirting with Fadel. However, he gets abruptly interrupted in his work when Fadel suddenly pulls him out from underneath the car with no warning and attacks him with a shower of kisses. Style is very amused about it, but it's not the right time or place for something like this and so he complains, reminding Fadel that Style's father could show up. Fadel asks him if Style is scared and personally, I don't think it's that Style is scared. I think it's more about how off-guard Fadel caught him, Style wasn't mentally prepared for a sudden kiss shower/potential make-out session from one second to the next. And also, Style knows his dad is out and could return at any moment and let's be real... This would be a very awkward situation to have your parent walk in on you, for both you and your parent.

But Fadel doesn't care and continues to shower Style in kisses anyway. Since the message didn't reach Fadel the first time or Fadel is deliberately ignoring the message, Style tries again, now explicitly asking Fadel if this was the time for kissing (I know in the subs it's a statement but in Thai he actually phrases it like a question). Instead of answering, Fadel goes into an explanation about the difference between a kiss and a peck which ends in a demonstration of what a kiss really is. Style is still very amused and even laughs, but he's getting more suspicious by the minute. He pushes Fadel away again and starts questioning him: "Why are you here?"

Now, this isn't literally what he's saying in Thai, but I can see why it would have been translated that way, because I, too, am struggling to find a way to make the literal translation sound smooth and natural in English. Plus, the second part of what he's saying can be taken a few different ways:

นี่มึงมาหากูอ่ะ มีอะไรหรือเปล่ว [nîi - mueng - maa hăa - guu - àh • mii - à-rai - rĕu bplào] [interjection] - you - come visit - me - [particle] • there is - something, anything - or not

Now, the literal translation of the first part is pretty straight forward, it's just "you came to visit me". The second part is slightly more complicated because the literal translation is "Do you have anything?" or "Do you have something?" which doesn't really make any sense in English. This phrase means something along the lines of:

What's up?/Is something up?/Is anything up?

Is there a problem?

Is something on your mind?

What's the matter?

Is something wrong?

Basically, the sentiment here is something along the lines of: "The reason why you came by, is there anything going on?" (Funnily enough I find this a lot easier to translate into German: "Dass du zu mir gekommen bist, gibt's denn was?")

Point is, Style isn't just asking "Why are you here?" because he's surprised and wants to know the reason, but he is specifically asking if there's anything up, because he can tell there is something off about Fadel's behavior and that there's got to be a reason for it. And when he says "You could have let me know you were coming", in Thai this is also phrased like a question:

Why didn't you let me know first? ทำไมไม่ทักมาก่อนอ่ะ [tam-mai - mâi - ták maa - gòn - àh] why - not - speak to - first - [particle]

Again, Fadel doesn't really answer any of Style's questions and just comes up with a counter question: "We’re dating. Can’t I just pop by and see you?" Style is still very amused about this and the way he looks at Fadel is full of love and affection. However, as much as Style appreciates the sweetness, it's very out of character and that has him even more skeptical now: "What is this? You’re being weirdly nice. What’s with you?" By the way, when Style says "nice", the word he uses in Thai is หวาน [wăan], which translates to "sweet". Style is explicitly calling out Fadel's odd overly clingy behavior.

And again, Fadel deflects Style's inquiries about what is going on with him, this time with a complaint: "You don’t like me being nice. You complain when I’m cold. What do you even want?"

I'm just gonna share the literal translation with you, even though it doesn't really make much of a difference (except for Fadel also saying "sweet" instead of "nice") simply just because I found it amusing:

When I'm sweet, you don't like it. ตอนกูหวานมึงก็ไม่ชอบ [dton - guu - wăan - mueng - gôr - mâi - chôp] when - I - sweet - you - [sentence link] - not - like When I'm hostile, you still scold me. ตอนกูโหดมึงก็ด่ากู [dton - guu - hòht - mueng - gôr - dàa - guu] when - I - aggressive - you - [sentence link] - scold - me How exactly do you like it? มึงชอบแบบไหนกันแน่เนี่ย [mueng - chôp - bàep năi - gan nâe - nîia] you - like - which way - exactly - [particle]

I just find it amusing that Fadel complains about Style scolding him, when Fadel has spent the first few episodes doing nothing but scold and yell at Style himself.

Anyway, Fadel turns it around on Style and Style is quick to conciliate him ("I’m just not used to you like this.") and then explicitly tells Fadel that he is being out of character ("You don’t sound like you, you know?"). And let me just share a literal translation with you, for funsies:

I'm just not used to the tone of your voice right now. กูแค่ไม่ชินกับน้ำเสียงมึงตอนเนี่ย [guu - kâe - mâi - chin gàp - náam-sĭiang mueng - dton - nîia] I - just - not - used to - your tone of voice - (right) now - [particle] You don't seem like you at all, you know? ดูไม่เป็นมึงเลยรู้วะ [duu - mâi - bpen - mueng - loiie - rúu - wá] seem, look - not - be - you - [particle for emphasis] - know - [particle]

Fun fact: the word that is used to say "seem like" is ดู [duu], which also means "to look". That is to say, the sentence could also give a feeling of "it looks like it's not you at all" or "you don't look like you at all".

Fadel doesn't sound like himself in the way he speaks, and Fadel doesn't seem ("look") like himself in the way he behaves. Something is wrong with the Fadel that Style knows and loves, and Style can very much tell. So he keeps pulling back, keeps refusing to accept Fadel's affection and kisses until he's gotten to the bottom of what is going on. But Fadel hits him with a (seemingly) romantic line: "Don’t you ever think that I’m only like this because of you?" This has Style smile. After all, Fadel isn't exactly wrong about this. Fadel has indeed changed through Style's influence since their first meeting. It's the most sincere thing Fadel has said in this entire conversation so far. Style looks at Fadel fondly and finally lets him kiss him without a protest. And that, of course, is the exact moment Style's dad has to arrive home. Our lovebirds ended up being walked in on by a parent after all. How awkward.

Fadel quickly jumps to his feet and Style sits up. After a short banter between Style and his dad, Style's dad turns to Fadel and asks: "You’re here so late. Where are you guys going?"

And again, I wanna share a more literal translation of the ensuing conversation:

Dad: Where are you inviting him to go to? จะชวนไปไหนกัน [jà - chuuan - bpai - năi - gan] will - invite - go - where - together Official subs: Where are you guys going? Fadel: I'm not inviting him anywhere. I was gonna come to ask to spend the night. ไม่ได้ชวนไปไหนครับ จะมาขอนอนค้าง [mâi dâai - chuuan - bpai - năi - kráp • jà - maa - kŏh - nawn káang] not - invite - go - anywhere - [krub] • will - come - ask for - spend the night Official subs: We’re not going anywhere. I’m just staying over.

It doesn't really make much of a difference here, but I find it interesting how just a little bit of rephrasing to "I'm just staying over" makes it sound like Fadel had already decided and was set on it (which to be fair he probably was anyway) while in Thai that decision is less straight foreward, because he says he wanted to ask to spend the night (he's not just barging in, but asks for permission first. Although, let's be real, I'm sure if Style had said no, Fadel would have done his best to talk Style into letting him stay over anyway. That is, if he had even planned on spending the night at Style's in the first place or if he just said that to appease Style's dad, considering Fadel didn't even seem to bring his own PJs for a sleepover).

Anyway, Fadel wanting to spend the night is news to Style. He looks at Fadel with question marks all over his face. This isn't helping in making Fadel's behavior seem any less odd.

Style's dad is cool with Fadel staying over, but wants to have a chat with him under the guise of Fadel helping him. Once the dad has walked off, Style starts questioning Fadel again: "Hey. Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to stay over?" Fadel crouches down, takes Style's head in his hands and says: "It’s only normal for boyfriends to cuddle to sleep, right?" Style smiles at him and while there is so much adoration in his expression, he is also not at all convinced or reassured.

Style goes uncharacteristically quiet and almost kind of passive after Fadel crouches down, as if he's letting Fadel's touches and kisses just sort of happen to him. Style clearly has a bad feeling about this. He doesn't even keep the smile up until Fadel has walked away, instead his smile falls the moment Fadel has turned his back to him.

Something is very much not right about any of what just happened with Fadel and Style knows it:

Side quest: Protective Dad

Okay, so by now you're probably well aware of the fact that for this meta series I only look at scenes featuring Style. However, I do wanna take a quick dip into the scene between Fadel and Style's dad, because it confirms what I said in my ep6 meta when I went into why I think Style's dad asked Fadel whether Fadel was Style's one-time thing or if he was taking Style seriously:

[I]t's more [Style's dad] being a bit of a protective dad who wants to make sure the people his son keeps company with aren't gonna cause heartbreak to his son.

And it already shows in the scene when Style's dad walks in on them kissing. I actually shared this specific literal translation for a reason:

Dad: Where are you inviting him to go to? Fadel: I'm not inviting him anywhere. I was gonna come to ask to spend the night. Official translation: Dad: Where are you guys going? Fadel: We’re not going anywhere. I’m just staying over.

What is happening in Thai is that Style's dad is addressing only Fadel with his question. Where are you taking my son? What are you gonna be doing with my son? What are your plans with my son?

Style's dad trusts his own son, but Fadel is a stranger to him and so he needs to make sure his son will be safe in Fadel's hands. After all Style's dad and Style only have each other now. And we've already heard from Style how important they are to each other. And when Fadel lets dad know they're staying in, dad is relieved: "That’s good. Stay over so I don’t have to worry."

After that, he immediately pulls Fadel aside to question him some more away from his son: "So I take it you’re serious about him, then?"

I wanna share some of the ensuing conversation with a more literal translation again:

Fadel: Serious in what way? จริงจังแบบไหนครับ [jing jang - bàep năi - kráp] serious - how, in what way - [krub] Official subs: What do you mean? Dad: Well, serious as in calling it dating. (lit.: "calling it being each other's faen") ก็จริงจังแบบที่เรียกว่าเป็นแฟนกันน่ะ [gôr - jing jang - bàep - têe - rîiak wâa - bpen faen gan - nâ] well - serious - like - that - be called - dating - [particle] Official subs: You’re really dating him, aren’t you? My son isn't imagining it, right? ลูกกูไม่ได้คิดไปเองใช่ไหม [lûuk guu - mâi dâai - kít bpai eng - châi măi] my son - not - imagining/thinking by oneself - right? Official subs: He’s not being led on, is he?

I wanted to share this mostly because of the last sentence. Usually, Style's dad uses the rude pronouns guu/mueng when talking to Style (he does with Fadel, too) and so he also uses the rude pronoun man when referring to him in 3rd person in this conversation with Fadel. But in the last sentence he refers to Style as "my son" specifically, which I adore. That's his son! Style is his son! And he doesn't want to see his son get hurt because the guy he's with was just playing him and it was all just one-sided on Style's part in the end.

Fadel says he's not leading Style on. Style's dad is a bit relieved and shares that he was worried since Style was the one who hit on Fadel first. Now this is a very interesting, because that feeds right into the discussions from after episode 3 dropped about Style preferring to be pursued rather than doing the pursuing himself which I also address in my ep3 meta.

Anyway, Style's dad says that he won't have to worry anymore and then continues to say:

I don't know what the world of two men together is like, กูก็ไม่รู้หรอกนะว่าโลกของผู้ชายกับผู้ชายมันเป็นยังไง [guu - gôr - mâi - róo - ròk - ná - wâa - lôhk - kŏng - pûu-chaai - gàp pûu-chaai - man - bpen - yang-ngai] I - not - know - [particle] - [particle] - that - world - of - man - with, and - man - it - is - how Official subs: I don’t know anything about dating boys, but if you like him, then like him for a long time. แต่ถ้ามึงชอบมันอ่ะก็ชอบมันให้นานๆ [dtàe - tâa - mueng - chôp - man - àh • gôr - chôp - man - hâi naan naan] but - if - you - like - him - [particle] - then - like - him - for a long time Official subs: but if you’re gonna date him, I hope it’s steady.

There is no deeper reason behind me sharing this except that it amuses me that the dad phrases gay dating as "the world of a man with a man" and that I think somehow the dad asking Fadel to like Style for a long time sounds almost sweeter to me than the word "steady". I don't know, maybe the word "steady" simply just sounds kinda weird to my ESL brain. And I like how phrasing it as "like him for a long time" makes liking Style something that Fadel actively does. Fadel is an active participant in this relationship, this relationship is not something that kind of just is. Fadel can actively influence how the relationship is gonna go and how it will affect the well-being of dad's son. It's almost like a task that Style's dad is giving him.

Style's dad closes with "My son may talk big and annoy people, but when he loves, he does with his whole heart. Just like his old man does." And we know dad is speaking the truth when he says Style loves with all his heart. Episodes 5 and 6 are proof of that. (Btw, the literal translation from Thai actually sounds less poetic in English: he says that when Style loves someone, he "truly loves them". I can't speak for the connotations in Thai, though, because I didn't ask anyone about it. Maybe it sounds more poetic in Thai.)

Anyway, I just adore this scene, because in episode 1 and episode 4 we already got some glimpses into the dynamic Style has with his dad and in episode 5 Style revealed just how important his dad was to him. And now in episode 7 we get to see dad's side of it as well. He is so very protective over his son and he will let Fadel know. In fact, so far in every single scene in which Style's dad and Fadel have interacted, Style's dad has made it very clear to Fadel that he is worried about Fadel's intentions with his son. Honestly, the fact that Style's dad is so adamant about this makes me wonder if maybe he's had to watch his son get his heart broken before and doesn't want a repeat of that. Either way, I just adore this father-son relationship and I hope Style's dad will make it out of this story okay (no one dies in a romcom, right? 🥺). And I hope he adopts Fadel in the end.

No. 2: Scent Addict

Just as a quick reminder, we left Style sitting on his cart on the floor of the garage looking very concerned and very confused, clearly suspicious of Fadel and uncharacteristically quiet. Now we come back to Style sitting on his bed on the floor, watching his boyfriend make a big show of sniffing his shirt (shout out to the costume department for using the chance to put Joong in a crop top! They're the real MVPs). Fadel compliments Style's smell and Style is not impressed. In fact, Style immediately calls Fadel out for being weird again: "I think something’s wrong with you. It’s not like you to talk so sweet." Or in it's more literal wording:

I think you're unwell. กูว่ามึงไม่สบายแล้วนะ [guu - wâa - mueng - mâi sà-baai - láew - ná] I - think - you - ill, unwell - already, now - [na] It really doesn't seem like you to be so sickly sweet. มึงหวานเลี่ยนแบบเนี้ยดูไม่ใช่มึงเลย [mueng - wăan lîian - bàep níia - duu - mâi châi - mueng - loiie] you - overly sweet - like this - seem, look - not - you - [particle for emphasis]

I mainly wanted to share this, because in the second sentence he uses almost the exact same wording like earlier on the garage floor when he said that Fadel didn't seem like himself:

ดูไม่เป็นมึงเลยรู้วะ [duu - mâi - bpen - mueng - loiie - rúu - wá] seem, look - not - be - you - [particle for emphasis] - know - [particle]

Compared with what he says now:

มึงหวานเลี่ยนแบบเนี้ยดูไม่ใช่มึงเลย [mueng - wăan lîian - bàep níia - duu - mâi châi - mueng - loiie] you - overly sweet - like this - seem, look - not - you - [particle for emphasis]

Again, the image Style is being presented of Fadel doesn't look like the image of Fadel that he knows and loves. Fadel laughs, says he's fine and sits down on the bed next to Style. Back in the garage, Fadel responded with "Don’t you ever think that I’m only like this because of you?" which was a truth so sufficiently sincere that it satisfied Style enough to the point to let Fadel kiss him without a protest, completely oblivious to the fact that Fadel didn't necessarily mean this truth in the way Style thought he meant it. Now in Style's room, Fadel's response to Style's accusation of not seeming like himself is similar to the one on the garage floor: "Meeting you has brought out a different side in me, is all. Didn’t you notice? I’m happier. I smile more." Again, Fadel goes for the truth. We know it's the truth because we've watched Fadel smile and laugh and just be happy whenever he was around Style ever since their conversation by the car in episode 4 that led to a change in their relationship status. We know this, and Style knows it, too. There is no need to be suspicious about this, what Fadel said makes complete sense. Style agrees: "You’re right. You were like a vicious dog before this. You even beat me up. I should get the credits for bringing out this sweet side in you."

Fun fact, Style actually doesn't want the credits himself but wants to give them to his charm specially instead:

I have to give credits to my charm for being able to pull this extreme sweetness out of you. นี่กูต้องให้เครดิตเสน่ห์กูนะ ที่ดึงความหวานเลี่ยนออกจากตัวมึงได้อ่ะ [nîi - guu - dtông - hâi - kreh-dìt - sà-nèh guu - ná • tîi - deung - kwaam wăan lîian - òk - jàak - dtuua meung - dâai - àh] [interjection] - I - have to - give - credits - my charm - [particle] • that - pull, draw - overly sweet sweetness - out - from - your body - be able to - [particle]

Fadel laughs and throws his arms around Style, resting his chin on Style's upper arm. But Style feels stinky after having worked on a car and really doesn't want to be hugged right now because it's kinda gross. Fadel doesn't care, though, and just starts smelling Style on purpose. In Fadel's opinion, Style doesn't smell bad. In fact, Fadel likes Style's smell. Or at least that's what Fadel claims, because Style just can't imagine it to be true. He jokes that Fadel must really be unwell if he likes the smell of gasoline. Style informs Fadel that you can get addicted to that and Fadel responds that he thinks he's already addicted, then. Style smiles fondly. Fadel says he hella likes it to the point that no doctor anywhere can cure it:

I like it very much. โคตรชอบเลย [kôht chôp loiie] extremely, very much - like - [particle for emphasis] Like this, no doctor anywhere can cure it. แบบเนี่ย หมอที่ไหนก็รักษาไม่ได้ [bàep nîia • mŏh - têe năi - gôh - rák-săa - mâi - dâai] like this • doctor - anywhere, somewhere - [sentence link] - cure, treat - not - be able do

What I love about this whole bit is that Style keeps complaining and keeps questioning Fadel's sense of smell, but he still lets Fadel hug him and smell him without trying to shake him off in any way. And ultimately, he is also charmed that Fadel is still so into him, even when he himself feels so dirty and smelly and gross:

(↑ This is Style's face in reaction to Fadel saying he's addicted to the smell of gasoline aka Style's smell, btw. Look at him smiling and leaning closer. This absolutely worked on him.)

Now, the question that we, the audience, get to ask ourselves is just how much of what Fadel is saying and doing here is for show and how much of this is genuine on Fadel's part. Personally, I do think all of the kisses and his opinions on Style's smell come from a genuine place and Fadel just takes what's already there and plays it up a lot more than he usually would. It's both genuine and ingenuine at the same time. In a way, it's also almost as if he's also trying to use the opportunity to get as much out of it for himself as well while he still can. In any case, from the moment he sat down on the bed, Fadel is definitely being more genuine and sincere than compared to earlier at the garage. And Style also reacts to Fadel's behavior differently. In the garage he kept trying to push Fadel away, kept asking him question to get to the bottom of things. But now, especially after Fadel has truthfully pointed out how he's gotten happier and has started smiling more because of Style, Style lets Fadel get closer again. Style still looks confused and skeptical when Fadel hugs him, and while he does lean away from Fadel a little when Fadel gets close, he doesn't try to push him off immediately. It takes over half a minute before he finally wiggles in Fadel's arms and insists on showering for the first time. And when Fadel then just continues to shower him with kisses, Style doesn't try to push him away like he did in the garage, nor does he try to get his own body away from Fadel in any way. He doesn't even try to wiggle his way out again when he repeats that he's gonna take a shower. What's more, back in the garage, Style also kept asking Fadel questions to find out what the hell had suddenly gotten into him, but now, even though it definitely registers that Fadel is clingier than usual, Style is still reassured enough to go along with it and to have flirty banter about being addicted to the smell of gasoline instead of interrogating Fadel about his behavior. Style isn't really pushing Fadel away this time, but goes along with it, not just in letting Fadel shower him with kisses for a significant amount of time or in taking part in the flirty banter, but also later in complying when Fadel asks for kisses. Style even leans a little closer to Fadel when he asks "Happy now?" after obeying to Fadel's wish. And of course Style is still weirded out about Fadel's uncharacteristically clingy behavior, but I think when they're sitting on the bed it's happening more on a subconscious level and his main concern really is that he is gross and stinky and just wants to go get cleaned up already.

And so he tells Fadel just that. That he'll go take a shower. But instead of letting Style go, Fadel just goes back to sniff kissing Style's arm. Style tries again. Fadel stares at him for a moment, then points at both of his own cheeks. Fine. If that is the price Style has to pay for Fadel letting him go take a shower, Style will gladly pay it in full. Style makes sure Fadel is completely satisfied now, even dropping a "krub" on him:

Happy? You happy, krub? พอใจมั้ย พอใจมั้ยครับ [poh-jai - mái • poh-jai - mái - kráp] be satisfied, content, pleased - ? • be satisfied, content, pleased - ? - [krub]

(German speakers: พอใจ [poh-jai]​ has the same vibe as "zufrieden" to me.)

Fadel finally releases him and Style gets up. But he doesn't get very far before Fadel catches his hand and holds him back. Style turns back around, laughs, and is affectionately annoyed. There really does seem to be something going on with Fadel and Style directly calls him out, questioning him again:

Why are you being so cutesy today? ทำไมวันนี้อ้อนจังเลยอ่ะ [tam-mai - wan-níi - ôhn - jang loiie - àh] why - today - cutesy - so much - [particle] Official subs: You're so weird today.

The word that Style uses here that I phrased as "cutesy" is อ้อน [ôn] which was explained to me as acting a certain cutesy way because you want something from the other person (which can also be something like simply just wanting affection). In the words of my friend, the mood this word conveys is basically "a cat rubbing up against you". And it makes sense for Style to call out Fadel for being so overly clingy and affectionate when Fadel has never really been that way with him before.

To Style's surprise, instead of being more clingy and affectionate (or asking to join Style in the shower, which I personally was expecting to happen), Fadel asks him on a date the next day. Fadel then reveals that it'll be Bison's birthday and Style wants to buy him a present, but Fadel says Style doesn't have to. That it's Kant's duty. Style should buy something for Fadel instead. Style asks on which day his birthday is and Fadel tells him it's on Christmas. Style loves that and tells him: "Lucky you. That’s a good day to be born on. I'll be your Santa Claus sneaking in your house and leaving a present for you." Fadel wants to know what that present will be. Style doesn't say anything, just looks at Fadel for a moment before he leans forward and plants a kiss onto Fadel's lips. When he looks at Fadel afterwards, his expression is full of adoration:

It's as Style's dad said: when Style loves someone, he really truly does. With all of his heart. And that heart full of love is exactly what he will give to Fadel. Fadel laughs. Style's smile widens a tiny bit*. He's in love. Then he turns around, making sure he gets his face just a liiittle bit closer to Fadel's while he turns, and then finally makes it to his shower.

*see second image above

Style can't see the way Fadel's expression darkens after Style has walked away.

No. 3: I Know You Don't Know I Know

The date turns out to be a BB gun war. Of course the lovebirds have teamed up boyfriends vs. boyfriends. Style is in the middle of firing a few shots towards the other team when Fadel stops him. Style tells him that he can handle the enemy himself, but Fadel says Kant has to go through him first. Then he makes a very shady comment: "He started all this, after all." Style squints at Fadel, alarmed and confused.

That's weird. Fadel isn't supposed to know this. Style asks for clarification and Fadel elaborates: "Because he hit on my brother, you got to know me." Or in his actual wording, because I'm having too much fun with this:

Ai'Kant came to hit on my little brother and you came to hit on me. ไอ้กานต์มาจีบน้องกู แล้วมึงก็มาจีบกู [âi Kant - maa - jìip - nóng guu • láew - meung - gôr - maa - jìip - guu] Ai'Kant - come - hit on - my little brother • and - [sentence link] - come - hit on - me

Fadel then repeats that this is how Kant started it and subtly throws Style a challenge: "What did you think I mean?" Or also:

What were you thinking (of/about)? มึงคิดอะไรเนี่ย [mueng - kít - à-rai - nîia] you - think - what - [particle]

While this sure is plausible, Style still isn't very reassured. It seems like a weird time to bring this up, especially with Fadel having acted very out of character the day before. Not to mention, why would Fadel pull a correlation between Kant hitting on Bison and Style hitting on Fadel? For all Fadel should know, him and Style first met when Style crashed into Fadel's car. There is no reason for Style's flirting to be related to Kant hitting on Bison in any way. But Style can't exactly tell Fadel all that, so he brushes Fadel's question off, saying he wasn't thinking of anything. Then he brings the topic back around to their war game: "But you gotta let me play, too." Now here I do desperately need to share Style's actual words, because we've got something very interesting going on here:

But let me take a shot some time, too. แต่มึงให้กูยิงบ้างดิ [dtàe - mueng - hâi - guu - ying - bâang - dì] but - you - let - me - shoot - some - [particle]

(Alt. translations": "But let me shoot some too." or "But let me take some shots.")

Style doesn't just wanna play the game, no, he actively wants to take a shot himself. Might that be foreshadowing? Will Style be shooting someone at some point? If this was a video essay, I would now put a counter in a corner that takes note of every time there is a reference to Style shooting a gun this episode.

Style says Fadel doesn't have to act like his bodyguard all the time and then leans closer to tell Fadel: "I know you’re good at this. But I ain’t no loser, either." There is a lot of weight to Style's words, he really means what he says. This is important to him. He wants to be able to stand his own ground, too. Although, it's actually kind of ironic that Style says this. We all saw how he did in that fight at the host club in episode 3. But then again, maybe watching Fadel take on three grown men on his own while being completely useless in the situation himself has kicked Style into determination to be able to fight for himself alongside Fadel, especially once he found out about Fadel's hitman identity. Or maybe he's played a lot of BB gun war games before and is actually good with guns, but is simply just useless in a fist-fight.

Anyway, this time it's Style who's said something that suspiciously alludes to something that Style actually in reality should not know. He doesn't know that Fadel now knows Style knows and so when Fadel calls him out on it, Style is caught a little off-guard. "How’d you know I’m good at this?", Fadel asks. It's a very pointed question, a suspiciously specific question. Style stutters for a moment before he comes up with a plausible reason: "I can tell from how you hold your gun. It’s obvious you’re a professional." Without Style's knowledge his word choice betrays him again. Right after the words are out of Style's mouth, Fadel suddenly leans over to fire some shots at the other team past Style's shoulder (part of me wonders, if Fadel really did need to shoot right then and there or if he just did it for the dramaaa~~~), then grills Style some more: "Professional what?" Now, here's a the literal translation of how this conversation goes:

S: Just from that I already know you're a professional. รู้เเค่นี้ก็รู้ว่ามึงมืออาชีพ [rúu - kâe née - gôh - rúu wâa - mueng - meu aa-chîip] know - just that - [sentence link] - know that - you - professional F: What profession? อาชีพอะไร [aa-chîip - a-rai] profession, occupation - what

There is definitely something not right here with the way Fadel is phrasing his questions. With the way he is explicitly asking Style to state what Fadel's occupation is, an occupation through which one would gain expertise in how to hold and shoot guns. "What profession?" This is not a genuine question, it's a challenge. Does Fadel know anything that Style doesn't know?

Again Style takes a while to answer, searching Fadel's face for any hints before he says "Professional BB gun shooter."

Fadel laughs and finally stops grilling Style with questions he can't yet answer truthfully. Instead, Fadel drops a cheesy line on him. "I can’t help but get protective over my boyfriend." Although I feel like the Thai version sounds a bit less cheesy (at least the English translation of it, I forgot to ask my friend about the connotations in Thai):

I have a habit of looking after my boyfriend. กูติดนิสัยดูแลแฟน [guu - dtìt ní-săi - duu-lae - faen] I - have a habit (of) - looking after, taking care of - boyfriend

Then, Fadel takes up on Style's wish to get some shots in as well and suggests Style watches his back, telling him not to let anyone shoot Fadel. Style still looks at Fadel with that searching look on his face. Fadel is clearly playing at something, but Style can't figure out what exactly that is. Then Fadel hits him with another pointed question:

I can trust you, right? กูไว้ใจมึงได้ใช่ป่ะ [guu - wái-jai - mueng - dâai - châi bpà] I - trust - you - can - right?

Style still doesn't answer immediately, but instead of question marks, there is now determination in his face. This is a question he can firmly answer from the bottom of his heart. "Yeah. You can trust me." Fadel acknowledges it, but then waves his BB gun at Style in a subtle threat: "Don’t let me down." The message certainly reaches Style clear as day. He doesn't say anything, instead just searches Fadel's face again for answers he can't find.

Fadel gets up and throws himself back into the battle. Style stays put and watches him run off. Style squints a little as he stares after Fadel.

Something was very much not right about this conversations. Fadel's questions were too specific, too threatening even at certain points. Fadel is clearly onto something but Style just can't find the missing puzzle piece that would explain Fadel's recent behavior or all his probing questions. This isn't really the time to dwell on this, though, so after a moment Style gets back to playing as well.

The very first thing we see of Style next after Style says Fadel can trust him is Style shooting Kant in the back, which has me wondering if he will end up metaphorically shooting Kant in the back in a future episode. The "Style + guns" counter is up to 2. Style tells Kant "Love sure makes you do something stupid" which has got to be foreshadowing (exactly what stupid things are gonna be happening out of love?? 👀) and then Fadel walks over, puts his arm around Style's shoulder and brags about him. Style looks at Fadel, his expression content and pleased as they stand there arm in arm. Style got his shots in. He did Fadel proud. He did not let him down.

No. 4: The Power of Love

Now this scene is very interesting, because it's like Style does a complete 180. From the way he talks you'd think he's entirely forgotten how he's called out Fadel for behaving weird and saying weird things in literally every single scene from this episode so far. You'd think he's forgotten how Fadel was suspiciously dodging most of his questions on the garage floor. You'd think he's forgotten about how uncharacteristically sickly sweet and clingy Fadel was when he stayed in Style's bedroom. You'd think he's forgotten about how only earlier that day they were dancing around the topic of Fadel's true identity and how Fadel kept challenging and even subtly threatening him. What happened to the Style that was so very skeptical and suspicious of Fadel all episode?

Now, I think everything Style is saying here makes complete sense for his character. Style has always been a character full of optimism and hope (showcased perfectly well in episode 6) and especially in scenes with Kant he has often been the optimistic counterpart to Kant's pessimism and realism: When Kant was worried about James, Style suggested that James could simply just be out of town. When the Captain was about to arrest the brothers, Style figured the brothers would be free as soon as their boss was caught before Kant reminded him that that's not how it works in real life. When Kant and Style stood in front of closed restaurant doors, Style reminded Kant of and held onto how attached the brothers were to them. Now in the showers, when Kant voices his suspicions, Style is overly confident and optimistic again.

Style tells Kant "you think too much" when Style has done nothing but think a lot in all his scenes with Fadel so far. And all his thinking shows in the way he immediately has counter-arguments ready without even thinking about it. Style has been through all of this in his head already. I don't think that Style is necessarily actively talking himself into believing what he says, because his mood is too good for that and what he says sounds a bit too genuine for it to be addressed to himself. I think this really is the hope within him talking. And, frankly, also his confidence. I mean, look at the two of them. Who wouldn't quit their assassin job to be with them? Style and Kant are that awesome. Style fully believes that. And he fully believes in the power of love.

What was the thing that Style's dad again? When Style loves, he does truly does with all his heart. Style loves so sincerely, so intensely that of course it would feel powerful. Of course there is power in love. Of course it can turn a bad guy good. Why wouldn't it? Fadel went from a grumpy cat to someone who constantly smiles around Style because of Style's love. Fadel wore the matching couple shirts because of Style's love. Fadel danced and sang karaoke in public because of Style's love. Fadel wore fan make-up in public because of Style's love. Why wouldn't Fadel stop killing because of and for Style's love? And why would the same thing not go for Bison and the love Kant has for him? I know there've been some entertaining posts going around making fun of how Style puts killing people on the same level as stealing cars, but that's just genuinely how Style thinks. Because Style doesn't draw a comparison in which one is worse. Both are simply bad. Both, Kant and Bison did bad things. They can connect over that. And the power of love will fix things.

Just like in episode 6, Style refuses to just sit there in misery. He refuses to be stressed as long as there is still a small glimmer of hope that things end well. Yes, Fadel has been acting weird, but until Style has definite proof that something is indeed extremely wrong, he'll go and enjoy life. As long as there is still a positive, plausible explanation or a positive way out, he'll go and enjoy life. There could be something wrong, but there doesn't have to be and so Style chooses to hold onto the thought that there isn't anything wrong for now until proven otherwise. And with that energy, he goes bowling that same night.

No. 5: Eventful Evening

The four of them round off Bison's birthday with a double date at the bowling alley. Style is in the bestest of moods. Kant and Bison walk off for some bowling. Fadel and Style stay back at the table and watch from a distance as Kant hands Bison his birthday present. Style is impressed at how romantic Kant is is being. Style could never. And now that I think about it, that actually seems to be true. Style has been romantic towards Fadel, but from the top of my head I can't remember a single instance in which Style pulled a pre-planned and prepared romantic gesture on Fadel. But that's okay. Because Fadel likes Style exactly the way he is. And Style is cool with that. He continues to say: "But you know, maybe I get like that, too. I could spring a ring on you one day and just ask you to marry me."

You never know! Fadel reacts fondly. Style throws him another happy smile. They both go to take a sip of their beer. Out of the blue, Style starts choking and ends up on the couch. Fadel panics. Style springs a ring on him and goes: "Will you marry me?"

Pronoun time! For just this one sentence, for just the marriage proposal Style switches to the polite phom pronoun before he jumps back to the rude guu pronoun:

แต่งงานกับผมนะครับ [dtàeng ngaan gàp - pŏm - ná - kráp] marry - me - [na] - [krub]

Now, at this point I sincerely need to apologize to those who read my ep6 meta before I went ahead and edited it because I made a really big mistake: I completely forgot to mention a very important language note in a specific scene because there was so much else going on that scene and it was only when I watched the cast reaction to ep6 that it hit me. I have since edited my meta post and added it, but if you missed it let me tell you there is a word play I failed to mention in the scene where Fadel puts make-up on Style: you know when Style says "Then you should put some makeup on, too"? The word he uses here is แต่ง [dtàeng], which is used in the sense of แต่งหน้า [dtàeng nâa] which means "to put make-up on" or is also used in the sense of แต่งงาน [dtàeng ngaan] which means, well, "to get married" or "to marry". In Thai, Style leaves out the second part of the phrase that makes it explicit which of the two it is and so the sentence can be heard either as "So, will you put on make-up with me?" or as "So, will you marry me?"

And it's just veeeery interesting that Style asks Fadel to marry him for the second episode in a row. If it happens again next episode, I'm calling it. But for now, let's wait and see 👀

Style is absolutely delighted that his little prank actually worked on Fadel: "You’re usually too smart for me." Fadel stares at him for a moment, then shakes his head, sighs, and replies: "Not at all. I’m a damn fool. That’s how you got me."

And fun fact: when he says "That's how you got me", in Thai the word that was translated as "got" is หลอก [lòhk] which means "to trick" or "to deceive". Style tricked Fadel. And we know Fadel definitely isn't referring to just the marriage proposal alone. As perceptive as Style has been all episode about Fadel's weird behavior, now the double meaning slips right by him. Personally, I think it's because at this point he's too tipsy to pay attention to this and he's also too good in a mood to care. Besides, he's already decided to be optimistic about Fadel's behavior. Style grins at Fadel, slips the ring back onto his own finger, then holds out his hand to Fadel and looks up at him. With an eye roll, Fadel obliges and pulls Style up onto his feet. Style then excuses himself to go to the restroom.

Style is so tipsy, he is about to fall asleep at the urinal when a random guy he doesn't know walks in and strikes up a conversation with him. Now, I think the whole thing about "We gotta keep these good things, don’t you think? People don’t seem to appreciate antiques anymore" is definitely alluding to something, but we're gonna have to keep watching to find out. And Style certainly wouldn't know, after all he doesn't know this dude. The guy walks into one of the cubicles and honestly, considering the ensuing interaction between Fadel and Style, I think Style is drunk enough that this didn't even fully register with him or maybe he just immediately forgets about it the moment Fadel walks in.

Style is quite surprised to see Fadel enter the restroom as well, but is also very happy about it: "Did you miss me so much you had to follow me to the bathroom?" This thought excites Style. Then Fadel asks about the other guy and starts looking through the stalls. Fadel's behavior is kinda weird again, but I think this time around Style really is too drunk to properly take note of it and connect it with Fadel's secret life. And as mentioned before, Style has decided to focus on the positives and not to stress unless given a solid reason to do so. And so for a moment Style observes Fadel checking the stalls before pushing Fadel against the wall and asking if he is jealous. When Fadel finally says yes, Style huffs a little, looking kinda pleased. And I can't help but think of @secriden's post about how back in episode 5 when Style said "I hope you're not the jealous type like your brother is" his body was saying the exact opposite of his words. And let me just share @braceletofteeth's tag on that very post too, while I'm at it:

#Style wants Fadel to claim him as his so bad it makes him look stupid #just like he takes pride in choosing his own man #he would be proud to be chosen as Fadel's man #delighted‚ if Fadel let others (and Style) know he's the one who earned the space reserved for his special someone #in his heavily secured heart #if he was so special to Fadel that he wouldn't want him to be taken away #or to share him with anyone else

I think we can really see this here in this scene as well. Fadel claims he's jealous and from Style's POV is in search for the random dude in order to take it up with him and defend his position as Style's boyfriend and that thought immediately has Style horny for Fadel. He advances on Fadel, trapping him against the wall on one side and goes on a monologue about how he only has Fadel now. The thought of Fadel being jealous has Style so horny for Fadel, he's ready to hook up with him right then and there in the bathroom stall. By now, Style has most definitely gotten too distracted and as a result forgotten that the random dude from earlier is still there. Lucky for Keen, Fadel declines and leaves the bathroom. Style stays back for a moment, watches him walk away, licks his lips and then follows him out.

Side note: Okay, so over my previous metas I've been very clear about how I think that Style isn't the kind of person to enjoy sleeping around all that much (at least not as much as Kant does). And in my ep3 meta I said that I think Style enjoys flirting around much more than sleeping around, attention hoe and chatty cat that he is. Now here in the bathroom, when he says that he only has Fadel now that of course could be taken as Style hooks up with many people. However, what he says right before that strengthens my belief that Style much rather flirts than actually hooks up: "I know I’m cute and all that. It’s only normal people strike up a conversation." Style never shuts up. And flirting? Hitting on someone? Is typically done via talking. So of course he'll engage with people striking up a conversation. And also, Style calls himself cute. I mean, I'm ace so I wouldn't know, but if you wanna end up in bed with someone wouldn't you like them to consider you "hot" or "sexy" rather than "cute"? At least that's how I'm imagining it that it goes (allos feel free to share some personal experience that I'm lacking). Anyway, yeah. I think, Style very much enjoys the whole flirting part. After all, that'll give him both attention as well as an excuse to talk.

Edit: FUCK, I JUST REMEMBERED THAT STYLE ACTUALLY HAS SEEN KEEN BEFORE IN EP3 WHEN HE EAVESDROPPED ON THEIR CONVERSATION!! That, of course, changes things significantly. I'm currently very busy working on my ep8 meta, but I'm gonna have to go back at some point and rethink this scene from the viewpoint of Style knowing that Keen has something to do with Fadel.

When Fadel and Style return from the bathroom, to Style's surprise he finds Kant with a kid. Style immediately walks over to say hello. I've seen discussions and headcanons on Style potentially helping Kant raise Babe. So far we saw Babe and Style in a scene together only one single time and they didn't even interact, so we don't really know what Style's relationship with Babe is like, but it certainly is quite likely that Style is an honorary older brother or uncle to Babe. Another thing I'm thinking is that Style probably also simply just likes kids. He is very excited and motivated to interact with the kid and I'm wondering if Style would like to have children of his own some time. After all, he did seem very open to the idea of being impregnated by Fadel back in episode 4.

But from one moment to the next his happy little interaction is interrupted by an unexpected gun shot. Some guy is waving around a gun and screaming bloody murder over his (ex) girlfriend. Style stays with Kant and the kid. That is, until Fadel claims to be the girl's new boyfriend. Maybe you've already seen a post about Style's outcry going around, but if you haven't, then let me just explain what Style literally says when he goes "Take it back!"

ผัวเค้าเหี้ยอะไร [pŭua - káo - hîia - àrai] husband - her - fuck, damn - what

Now, several things here: the characters use the word ผัว [pŭua] which is a slang term for "husband" which is also used in the sense of "boyfriend" (meaning, as far as I've picked up on the word doesn't mean that the people are married for real, though I might be wrong about this). In the following I'll use "man", because "husband" sounds too formal and "hubby" also sounds kinda weird in this context. Next, the word เหี้ย [hîia] is a curse word kinda like "fuck/fucking" or "shit" or "damn". Word for word the Thai sentence makes "her man fuck what" (alt.: "her man fucking what"). The sentiment of it is roughly:

Her man, my ass.

The fuck you on about, her man??

Her man, the fuck??

Her man, fuck no.

What the fuck, her man??

Take your pick. Style is very upset about this, even if rationally he knows that Fadel is doing it do protect the girl from being murdered. But in his drunken state and this being a life-or-death situation, he reacts emotionally instead (which tends to be his main route even when he's sober anyway, it's just worse now). This brings us back to: Style wants Fadel to claim him as his so bad it makes him look stupid (quoted from @braceletofteeth). Only minutes ago Style was excited at the prospect of Fadel being jealous and fighting for him and now here Fadel is, claiming someone else as his in a hall full of people. It stings, even if it's just pretend. Fadel is his boyfriend, thank you very much. Style's had to work hard, fight hard to even get to this position and he's not gonna let anyone, not even Fadel himself, take that away from him, goddammit. "Her man, the fuck?? You're MY boyfriend!!" But Kant pulls Style back down, worried about Style's safety. Style lets it go.

In the meantime, the assassin brothers are working on taking the shooter down and each gets hurt in the process. Both Kant and Style run to their respective boyfriends. Fadel shoos Style away, though, ordering him to check on Bison first. Style looks up and with terror realizes that the shooter isn't being checked on and could cause more harm at any moment. Style jumps to his feet and runs to the gun, picks it up and shoves it into the shooter's face without any hesitation. And that's a 3 on our "Style + guns" counter. Three times is a pattern, no?

Now, I've seen people wondering if Style maybe has some experience with guns from the way he confidently pointed it at the man. It could be a possibility (after all he seemed to have a handle on the BB guns as well), but I think a big reason why he reacted like this is that Style simply just likes to help and tends to act like a mediator (when he's not actively picking the fights himself). His reaction here really reminds me of the way he also threw himself into the fist fight at the host club, despite being a terrible fighter and standing no chance against those men. He sees that the situation is dangerous and his main desire is that it is resolved with as little harm being caused as possible. Style isn't really thinking here in this moment (in the sense of that he's actively using his brain). He acts on instinct and his instinct is telling him to keep the gun away from the shooter and to make sure the guy doesn't cause any more harm. Style's desire to protect his loved ones is so strong he doesn't even have the capacity to think about what he's doing here and whether he is even capable of shooting the gun in the first place and what that could potentially do to his mental state if he shoots (and possibly kills) someone. There is only "MUST PROTECT" going on in his mind. Finally, staff drags the dangerous man away. Style calls an ambulance at Kant's request.

No. 6: Signs (Of Worries)

In the process of taking down the shooter and saving the two women, Fadel hurt his arm and is now getting it treated at the hospital. And of course, Style is right by his side. As soon as the nurse is gone, Style starts asking Fadel worried questions. When Fadel claims that it doesn't hurt, Style is a little bit done with Fadel's constant need to pretend: "Just admit when it hurts. You don’t have to be tough all the time." Style loves Fadel, Style wants to be there for Fadel through the good times and even more so through the bad times. And especially in the bad times he doesn't want to spend the entire time having to guess how his boyfriend is doing, how his boyfriend is feeling. He wants to be a safe space for Fadel to be open and vulnerable. And just to hit the message home he tells Fadel out loud to make sure Fadel really doesn't miss it or can't ignore it: "I’m worried about you, you know? I thought you were a goner." Actually, in Thai he's more vague about it, he doesn't say that he was afraid of Fadel dying specifically:

I was afraid something would happen to you. กลัวมึงเป็นไรไปอ่ะ [gluua - mueng - bpen rai - bpai - àh] afraid - you - have a problem - [particle]

Also, he doesn't say he was "worried", he says he was "โคตร [kôht] worried". โคตร [kôht] is an intensifier, so basically Style is saying he is "super worried", not just "worried".

Fadel shoots him down, telling him not to overdo it. But Style isn't!!! He just watched his boyfriend go through a situation that could have potentially killed him if something had gone wrong. Not to mention, said boyfriend's brother is now lying at the very same hospital with a stab wound, because something went wrong. Style has every right to make a big deal out of it, because it is. To him it is. With worried puppy eyes he continues to say: "Can you please at least give me a sign before you do something like that again? I’m always here to help."

I want to share a more literal translation again, not because the content differs but because there's something about the original phrasing that I like:

Next time you're gonna do something, give me a sign. ทีหลังมึงจะทำอะไรอ่ะก็ส่งสัญญาณดิ [tii lăng - mueng - jà - tam - àrai - àh - gôh - sòng - săn-yaan - dì] next time - you - will - do - something - [sentence link] - send - signal - [particle] I'm always ready to help you. กูพร้อมช่วยมึงเสมออยู่แล้ว [guu - próm - chûuay - mueng - sà-mĕr - yùu - láew] I - ready - help - you - always - [aux] - already

I like that the first sentence is phrased like an imperative, not a question. Of course, in this moment Style is asking Fadel to do something specific, but the question is only implied. It's not a "Can you please do this?". No, it's a "Do this!", instead. It's an order. And what I find even more interesting (which we have in the translation too) is that Style doesn't say "Please don't do this again". He isn't keeping Fadel from doing dangerous things. Fadel is allowed to do them. But Style requires a sign first. A warning. A little heads-up so that he can mentally prepare. And even more so that he can help Fadel. "I'm always ready to help", he says. He is not just here to help but he is ready to jump to his feet at a moment's notice and help Fadel no questions asked.

He waits for Fadel to say something. Fadel asks about Bison. Style informs him that Kant is with Bison and Fadel starts to get up, saying he'll stay the night with his brother and orders Style to go home. Style has been sent home by Fadel many, many times before, so he is used to this. However, back then it was before they were a couple and Fadel sending Style away always made sense, because Style was in fact annoying Fadel and Style was aware of that fact. But now it's different, because now Fadel genuinely enjoys Style's presence and Style know that fact, too. And as always, Style won't let Fadel get rid of him so easily and so he holds Fadel back and starts questioning him about his weird behavior again: "What’s with you? You were so lovey-dovey an hour ago." Then he leans closer and takes Fadel's face between his hands, asking: "Is your brain okay? Did you hit your head?" And while the words Style is saying are certainly meant to be a joke, the sentiment behind them is 10000% serious. Something is not right with Fadel, something hasn't been right with Fadel since the day before, actually and lowkey even since the love confession at the diner. Style genuinely wants to know what's going on with Fadel. That's not a joke, there is nothing funny about this, even if he is phrasing it in a light-hearted way.

But Fadel shakes him off and moves to walk away again. Now Style gets stressed. There is absolutely no way he is leaving Fadel's side right now. He holds him back and yields, offering to take Fadel to Bison. Then he runs off to grab a wheelchair and maneuvers Fadel into it. Fadel humors him and Style wheels him off.

Bison is still sleeping when they arrive at his room. Kant gives them the update on Bison's health. Fadel announces once again that he'll stay with Bison overnight. Style is against it and comes up with sensible reasons why Fadel shouldn't. Fadel's arm is hurt and Style wants him to go home and rest. Fadel's well-being is a priority for Style right now. Kant can take care of Bison for a while, it's fine. Fadel can and should take a break and recover a little bit. Finally, Fadel agrees, even if he's not very happy with the situation. But despite him yielding to Style, he does speak out a warning to Kant: "But while I’m gone, if something happens to my brother, it’s your fault." The last sentence is even more direct in Thai:

You must take responsibility. มึงต้องรับผิดชอบ [mueng - dtông - ráp-pìt-chôp] you - must - take responsibility, be responsible

Fadel isn't just telling him that he will be blaming Kant for Bison's disappearance, but he's saying "You will be taking responsibility for his disappearance, you will pay for it". It's a threat. And in Thai, Style actually acknowledges that Fadel's words are a threat when he stands up for Kant:

And why are you threatening Ai'Kant? แล้วมึงจะไปขู่ไอ้กานต์ทำไม [láew - mueng - jà - bpai - kùu - âi - Kant - tam-mai] and - you - will - go - threaten - [prefix] - Kant - why, what for Official subs: Don’t give Kant a hard time, dude. Kant didn't do anything wrong. การต์ไม่ได้ผิดอะไรเลยนะ [Kant - mâi dâai - pìt - à-rai - loiie - ná] Kant - not - be/do wrong - anything, something - [particle] - [na] Official subs: None of this is his doing.

There is no reason for Fadel to threaten Kant when Kant was in no way involved with the insane man at the bowling alley that attacked Bison. Kant promises he'll take good care of Bison. Fadel just sits there wordlessly. Then, without a warning he gets up and walks out. Style calls after him: "Do you have to be so stubborn?" which in Thai is actually:

You're hurt and you're still stubborn?! เจ็บแล้วยังดื้ออีก [jèp - láew - yang - dêu - èek] hurt - and - still - stubborn - (once) more

I wanted to share this because I wanted to draw attention to how Style mentions Fadel being hurt again even when Style is complaining about his behavior. Fadel's injury is still very much on Style's mind. He just wants to take care of Fadel and be there for him. And so he runs after Fadel.

No. 7: Heed My Warning

Style follows Fadel into the hallway and tries to convince him to get back into the wheelchair again and to let Style take him home. But again Fadel tries to get rid of him: "I can walk. Just go back to your garage." Something is seriously not right about Fadel's behavior. Style looks at him searchingly, trying to figure him out:

Then he steps closer to Fadel and continues his fight. "I know you can. But boyfriends are supposed to take care of you at a time like this." I just want you to know that when he says "in times like this" the literal translation is something like "when you're sick and hurt":

ตอนเจ็บ���อนป่วย [dton - jèp - dton - bpùuay] when - hurt - when - sick

Fadel is hurt and Style is worried and he just wants to look after his boyfriend, goddammit. But instead, Style is met with a warning: "Once my brother gets better, we have some business to finish with you two."

The word Fadel uses here for "finish" in Thai is สะสาง [sà-săang] which the dictionary translates as "to clear up" or "to solve" and my friend who I asked about this word defined as:

to finish something and leave nothing unfinished

Yeah, Fadel is out for murder and he's gonna make damn well sure the job will be done properly and to the end. The sentiment reaches Style. He's confused. Where is this threat suddenly coming from? "What are you talking about? Sounds scary as hell." Fadel agrees. He repeats what he's tried to tell Style before, except this time the warning serves as a threat, a direct attack: "You should probably be wary of me." Style looks taken aback. Fadel continues his threat: "Whatever act we’ve put on up until now won’t be necessary anymore." Then, Fadel walks off. Style watches him go, speechless and alarmed. He gulps, not once, but twice.

The time for optimism and hope is over. Style has to face it: something is worryingly wrong with the way Fadel has been acting. Once back at his garage, he sits and thinks about Fadel's words again. Fadel knows something, but Style just can't figure out what exactly that something is. He grabs his phone and calls Kant, presumably to discuss the conversation with him and to warn him and to make sure Kant is safe. Kant doesn't pick up. Style has a really bad feeling about this.

No. 8: The Naked Truth

It's the next day and Style is back at the hospital. He doesn't even make it to Bison's room before he is stopped in his tracks. The police is here. Style stops a nurse and learns that Bison has kidnapped Kant. Style hides in the restroom to call Kant. Kant still isn't picking up. This is very very bad. But before Style can take action, someone grabs him from behind. Only seconds later, Style falls unconscious. Headcanons are out on whether Style could tell it was Fadel who attacked him by the feel of his body or not.

When Style wakes up, he finds himself tied up at a pool wearing no clothes save for his underwear. As most people in this situation would probably do, Style starts calling for help. And what's interesting is that he doesn't really seem panicky about it when he initially starts shouting. It's more concern than fear. It's only towards the end once it starts to sink in for him that he really does seem to be completely alone that the fear sets in. Except then he hears a familiar voice: "Stop shouting and shut up. No one can hear you here."

When Style asks what Fadel is doing and why he tied him up half-naked, Style's voice sounds a little stressed but there is also something reproachful about it. Fadel demands to hear the whole truth (Or one could also say... the naked truth. With the way he stripped Style of all his clothing). "What truth?" Style asks, and now the fear that was there a moment ago right before Fadel revealed himself is gone. Instead, Style is truly angry. He ain't got no time for these games. His best friend has been taken god knows where by a killer who could be doing god knows what to him (after all, Style doesn't know Bison as well as he knows Fadel) and he also isn't in the mood to be sitting around tied up and naked at a pool while getting a gun waved into his face by his boyfriend. Especially when he has no idea what the fuck his boyfriend is even on about. But luckily, Fadel explains. Remember how at the end of my ep6 meta I said "Style is missing a key piece of the puzzle and even if he can tell that something is off, to Style it still looks like a happy picture. To Style it still is a happy picture"?

Style asks "What truth?" and Fadel says "That you and your friend have been fooling me and my brother. You work for the police." And there it is. The last crucial piece of the puzzle that Style had been missing since the end of last episode to see the full picture.

Oh. There are several realizations happening in Styles reaction here. Fadel knows. Fadel knows that Style knows. And now Style also knows that Fadel knows that Style knows. Style has been trying so hard to get Fadel to drop the truth and now the moment is finally here. No more dancing around this topic. And also, all of Fadel's recently odd behavior suddenly makes perfect sense. It's all falling into place. During the BB gun war Style already had his suspicions that there was something that Fadel knew about and then when Fadel threatened him at the hospital in a way it just proved his suspicions. And now Style finally knows what exactly it is that Fadel had found out about. And Style now also understands that Fadel found out a wrong truth, or rather an inaccurate truth that paints a wrong picture of Style. And so Style clears it up: "I don’t know anything about those cops. Kant asked me to take you out so you could leave him alone and he could freely investigate." The anger that was in Style's voice before the reveal subsides when he goes into his defense and instead he is annoyed and impatient. After all, he is still naked and tied up at a pool. And his best friend is still missing from having been kidnapped by an actual assassin. Style doesn't have time for this argument right now. Fadel asks him another question: "What did he get out of it?" Style replies "I don’t know. That ain’t my business" and his tone is even more annoyed and also kind of exasperated now. How the fuck should he know?? Why is Fadel bothering him with this?? His only job was to make Fadel his boyfriend. That was his only role in this. He didn't have anything more to do with this.

Fadel wants to know where Kant took Bison to. Style is even more annoyed at this point. Yeah, I was trying to find my friend, too, before you got in my way and abducted me, you fucking idiot. Fadel doesn't believe it when Style says he, too, was looking for Kant. Now Fadel is getting annoyed and impatient as well. "Stop freaking lying." Style is frustrated. "I'm not lying." He informs Fadel of what the nurse said about Bison taking Kant and running away to some unknown location. Style is fed up. He really isn't in the mood for Fadel's stupid interview. He just wants it to be over. "Don’t hurt me, Fadel," he continues. And what I love about this is that there is absolutely no fear in his voice when he says this, no plea for his life. Because he doesn't say it in reaction to something Fadel said or did. Sure, there's a gun to Style's head that could be triggered at any moment, but the thing is that Style has been having this argument with a gun pointed at him for a full minute now and nothing has happened so far and so Style doesn't feel like he is in any immediate danger. And Fadel doesn't even do anything to indicate that he's about to use the gun on Style or that he's about to hurt him in any other way after Style explains that it was Bison who took Kant instead of the other way around. Fadel just stands there immobile, not acting significantly more threatening than he has for the past minute, so there is no reason for Style to be afraid. And it shows in the tone of his voice that he isn't afraid. When Style says "Don't hurt me" his voice sounds annoyed and irritated and frankly, just kind of done. It's almost as if he's saying Just drop the tough act already. Because Style knows it's an act. And I just wanna share something that @secriden wrote here, and I know this paragraph is actually in relation to Fadel's uncharacteristically clingy behavior all episode and to Style's lines that are about to follow, but when I read @secriden's words they had me thinking that this also goes for the seemingly tough act that Fadel is putting up in front of Style, not just the played up sweetness:

In the midst of all the secrets and lies between them, ever since [Style] found out about Fadel's secret and decided he was going to keep pursing him anyway, Style has been chasing and chasing Fadel's sincerity. And each precious revelation that Fadel gave him -- his parents' murder, his inability to trust, his desire for something genuine from Style -- has been carefully stored away in Style's heart like nuggets of gold. Which is why Fadel's performance was doomed from the start; because Style was moved by the true things and not the lies, and Fadel's pretensions can have no effect when Style's heart now has the ability to recognise that which he has already grown to love.

Style has gotten to know Fadel so well that he can recognize when Fadel is being sincere or not, whether it's about Fadel's affections or Fadel's threats. He's gotten to know all these different sides of Fadel, has learned to read him and has learned to differentiate between what is true and what isn't, the way Fadel has learned to differentiate the sincerity and the insincerity in Style's words and actions, too. Which is another reason why Fadel is doomed as well, because after all this time he, too, can tell when Style is being sincere or not. And what Style is about to say to him is indisputably sincere.

Fadel demanded the whole truth from Style, but there is one truth Style hasn't told him yet, at least not in explicit words anyway. And so he continues: "I know I worked for the police, but that was before I knew who you are. Now that I know you, I really love you, Fadel."

And let me just share my own translations again:

Even if it's true that I was a police informant, it was before I knew the real you. ถึงกูจะเป็นสายตำรวจก็จริงอ่ะ แต่นั่นมันก่อนที่จะรู้ตัวจริงของมึง [tĕung - guu - jà bpen - săai dtam-rùuat - gôh - jing - àh • dtàe - nân - man - gòn têe jà - rúu - dtuua jing kŏng meung] even if - I - be - police informant - [sentence link] - true - [particle] • but - that - it - before - know - real you But now that I know the real you, I love you for real, Fadel. แต่พอกูรู้ตัวจริงของมึงแล้วอ่ะ กูรักมึงจริงๆนะฟาเดล [dtàe - poh - guu - rúu - dtuua jing kŏng meung - láew - àh • guu - rák - mueng - jing jing - ná - Fadel] but - when - I - know - real you - already - [particle] • I - love - you - really - [na] - Fadel

You'll notice that I highlighted something there. I actually discussed the term ตัวจริง [dtuua jing] (= real self) with a native speaker friend and I even showed him the scene (bless his heart for putting up with my antics) and he said when he first heard those lines he was a little confused why it would be phrased like this, because usually in Thai they'd phrase it a little differently. We were hanging out in person and unfortunately I didn't write it down, so now I don't remember what the way my friend said it's supposed to be phrased as was, but yeah, apparently this is odd phrasing. Which is why it's even more interesting to me that in episode 5 Fadel says this:

The real me might be scarier than you think. ตัวจริงกูอ่ะ อาจจะน่ากลัวกว่าที่มึงคิดก็ได้ [dtuua jing goo - àh • àat-jà - nâa gluua gwàa - tîi - mueng - kít - gôh dâai] real me - [particle] • might - scarier - that - you - think - [particle]

The wording is basically the same (yes, Style adds the word ของ [kŏng] (= of, from) before the pronoun, but this word is optional and the meaning stays the exact same) and it just makes me wonder if Style's words were written as a deliberate call back to the conversation in episode 5. Back then Style asked Fadel to fully open up to him and told him "I promise that no matter who you are, I’ll still like you". Except back then the message didn't fully reach Fadel, because the cards weren't all out in the open just yet. But now they are. Style knows who Fadel is and Fadel knows that Style knows who Fadel is. And Style has actually gotten to know even more sides of Fadel since that conversation from episode 5 took place. "Now that I know the real you, I love you for real." He loves the grumpy side that always yells at him, the badass side that takes down three grown men in a fight, the happy side that loves heavy metal music and putting on band make-up, the side that has a passion for cooking, and ultimately even the dark side that is capable of killing people without remorse, even if he has yet to witness Fadel actually murdering someone. He isn't scared of him, not even when Fadel is waving a gun around his head. Style loves all of what makes Fadel Fadel.

This, however, is the one truth Fadel does not want to hear, can't hear right now. When he yells "Shut up" at Style, it's the loudest and most aggressive tone he's had in this entire conversation so far. At the same time he also advances on Style, putting his leg up on the step and shoving the gun even closer to Style's head. The yelling and the movement comes so sudden that it actually startles Style. Fadel continues to speak out a threat: "Say you love me one more time, and you’ll be lying at the bottom of this pool." He even mimics a kick. Style complains: "Hey!" Don't kick me into the pool, the fuck!? "I mean it!" Or in his actual words:

I'm telling the truth! กูพูดความจริงเว้ย [guu - pûut - kwaam jing - wóiie] I - say - truth - [particle]

Style is starting to get a little stressed now. What's Fadel threatening to kick him into the pool for when Style is literally telling Fadel the truth just like Fadel demanded? He's been telling Fadel all the information he has, all that he knows but Fadel still won't release him. Instead Fadel just keeps threatening him. Style really doesn't feel like ending up at the bottom of an empty pool, especially not when his best friend is being held captive himself god knows where. All while Style is stuck telling truths that Fadel doesn't want to believe, despite having demanded to hear them. So Style throws Fadel a little reminder:

People who are about to die speak all of the truth. คนจะตายก็พูดความจริงกันทั้งนั้นอ่ะ [kon - jà dtaai - gôh - pûut - kwaam jing - gan táng nán - àh] people - about to die - [sentence link] - say - truth - all, every - [particle] Official subs: I wouldn’t lie with a gun to my head like this.

When people are faced with death they don't typically lie. They tend to speak the whole truth. So why the fuck would Style be lying now? Having this yelling match while being tied up and naked at an abandoned pool is getting really stupid now. It also won't bring Kant and Bison back. If the truth and the power of Style's love can't bring an end to this situation then maybe Fadel's concern and love for his brother will. So Style, still in a rather irritated mood, suggests a deal: "Untie me and I’ll help you look for Bison and my friend." But Bison is another vulnerable spot for Fadel, and just like before he reacts in anger, waving his gun into Style's face: "I ain’t stupid anymore. I don’t trust a word that comes out of your mouth." And for those of you who are curious about the literal wording:

Whatever the hell you're saying, I'm not listening to you. มึงพูดเชี่ยอะไรกูไม่ฟังมึงหรอก [mueng - pûut - chîia à-rai - guu - mâi - fang - mueng - ròk] you - say - whatever the hell - I - not - listen - you - [particle]

No matter what Style says, Fadel won't hear him. The previously annoyed and angered expression on Style's face falls and his eyes widen a bit. Oh shit, you're for real?

His words are his best and only weapon that Style has, a weapon that is essentially rendered powerless if Fadel refuses to listen in any way. I think this is the moment Style realizes that there is a good chance that he can't talk his way out of this after all. That he might be wrong about Fadel sparing his life. After all, Style once was also overly confident that Fadel liked him enough to not do him any harm only for Fadel to punch him in the gut and abandon him on the cold, hard ground in some random storage room. There is a good chance that Fadel will pull the trigger for real. Fadel continues to rage: "You chose the wrong man to fool, asshole."

I think this is the first time that Style is honestly afraid since the very beginning of the scene when it sank in that he was alone. Where before his "don't hurt me" was mostly annoyed, this time when he shouts "Fadel, no!" he is is genuinely scared for his life. He leans away from Fadel, his eyes squinted close as he waits for the likely life-ending shot. He can't see the way Fadel's hand is shaking. The shot doesn't come. Style opens his eyes again. The screen goes black and we are left to find out later how exactly this ends.

No. 9: Hitman Teerak

Fadel did not kill Style. And Style knows for a fact that if Fadel didn't kill him back at the pool then there is no way he's killing him now. Style can afford to be cocky again. All the fear from when we left him has vanished completely and he is back to his overly confident, charmingly annoying self. And he's also wearing clothes again.

Fadel is still pointing a gun at him, but Style doesn't give a shit anymore. In fact, he is very unimpressed. When he asks "Where are you taking me?", he sounds annoyed again, if not downright bored like a child that doesn't wanna do a chore their parent gave them. By the way, the Thai version of this is even sassier:

Where are you taking me to kill me? มึงจะพากูไปฆ่าที่ไหนเนี่ย [mueng - jà - paa - guu - bpai - kâa - tîi năi - nîia] you - will - bring, take - me - go - kill - where - [particle]

Fadel informs him that the place doesn't matter, because Style will die either way. Style sighs a tired sigh and closes his eyes. Fadel really is that set on killing him, apparently, huh? It's getting old. Fadel says: "But before I kill you, I have to see my brother." Style opens his eyes again and turns around to Fadel. He really is getting tired of this. "Do you know where he is?" Fadel says no, but Style needs to help find him. Then Fadel makes a vow: "Once I find him, I’m going to kill you both." Style hesitates, then decides not to fight Fadel on this. He's tired of fighting this stupid fight. If Fadel wants to be stubborn then alright, Style will yield. And so he exasperatedly agrees with Fadel: "I know I deserve to die." Then he turns a bit away from Fadel and says in a pouty voice: "Well, at least I won’t die alone." Style is sulking. Fine. Kill me if you must. But at least I will die side by side with a friend and it won't be a lonely death, I guess. It's the little things in life. He looks at Fadel again. Fadel squints. "Shut up and drive." Suddenly there is impatience in Fadel's voice which was so firm and resolute the entire scene up until now. Then, Fadel goes back to threatening Style with death: "One wrong move, I’m blowing your brain out." Style is severely unimpressed. Or rather, he is impressed but certainly not in the way Fadel would want him to be impressed.

Style knows he's got Fadel now. Any death threat from now on will be utterly meaningless. Fadel won't kill him. Style goes for malicious compliance, but makes sure he makes a big sassy and kind of flirty show out of it to demonstrate just how much not scared of Fadel and his tough guy act he is. Because that's all it is, by now. An act. An act that Style will go along with, if it makes Fadel feel better. "Kruuuub, Mr. Hitman." Yes, yes, you'll kill me, I got it. "I’m scared enough as it is, no need to threaten me." You really don't need to repeat your death threats over and over, I'm sick of hearing them, uh, I mean, just look how terrified of you I am. "I know my life is in the palm of your hand." You've been pointing this gun at me for ages now and I'm still here, alive and kicking. Yes, I really, truly am at your mercy and so very scared for my life. "Why don’t you just take a nap instead or something?"

The last line actually makes me laugh even more in Thai:

Why don't you take the time that you spend threatening me to take a nap instead? มึงเอาเวลาที่มึงขู่กูอ่ะไปนอนมั้ย [mueng - ao - weh-laa - tîi - mueng - kùu - guu - àh - bpai nawn - mái] you - take - time - that - you - threaten - me - [particle] - go to bed - ?

Threatening me is pointless. How about you do something more productive with your time? Ain't that an idea? Style ends his "Fine, I'll fold to your wishes"-monologue in our beloved iconic line: "I’ll drive you where you want me to go, my hitman-teerak." As stated before, I'm always ready to help you, my love <3

Fadel keeps a poker face and orders Style into the car. Style doesn't move, he just defiantly tilts his head and looks at Fadel like well, watcha gonna do to me if I don't?

Fadel loses his temper a little and yells at Style to get going. Style finally moves, but right before he turns he smiles as he looks at Fadel and his eyes are full of warmth and affection. He loves this man.

Halfway on the way to the car door, Style turns around again and throws Fadel another warm, amused, and very pleased smile.

He knows he's already won. Life couldn't be going better for him right now. Style gets into the car and Fadel follows. And off they go, driving into the sunset off on their little road trip to find Kant and Bison.

Once in the car, Fadel lifts his gun back up at Style's head. Style throws him a look. And we all know Style would have jumped Fadel and ripped all his clothes off right then and there if he hadn't been busy driving a car. Fadel lowers the gun again. Style keeps looking over at Fadel, which has me nervously scream look at the fucking road oh my god you're gonna die via a car crash if not by Fadel's gun. Fadel finally takes that nap that Style suggested. Style keeps driving. He is happy and content and very satisfied. Fadel may have put his walls back up, may be pushing him away and threatening him again like he did before they started dating, but that's okay. Style has annoyed his way into Fadel's life once before, he can easily do it again. Especially now that he actually knows Fadel, knows how to handle him, knows how to get through to him. And this time around the flirting is real from the start. And what's even better, what's the biggest relief of it all is that the big secret is now fully out in the open. It had been weighing Style down a lot, but now he can finally talk about it. They can finally talk about it. And now Style can finally hammer it into Fadel's head for good that he isn't scared of him in any way, that he really has embraced him with his hitman identity and all. Style won't have to allude to it anymore in the future, no, he can explicitly say it. And he can show Fadel that it's worth for Fadel to open up 100% to Style, that Style will stick by his side no matter what and that Fadel can absolutely trust him. Style will make him believe that he absolutely, undeniably, irrevocably loves him. Life is going great.

(Overview | Ep1+2 | Ep3 | Ep4 | Ep5 | Ep6 | Ep8 | Ep9)

[eriochromatic]

I love your Silco takes so I was wondering if you could share yours on Vander and the drowning incident because no matter what angle I look at, it doesn't make sense.

As far as I can tell from what we're shown, the riot was well under way before Silco threw that molotov, and it's confirmed that enforcers killed Felicia. Thing is, it's implicit that Felicia chose to participate in the riot because a.) Why else would she be there, and b.) She was down with Zaun being independent for HER KIDS. Also, anyone who participates in a riot, or even a peaceful protest, knows they're putting their life on the line. So while I understand reacting to loss with intense grief, it's not exactly a surprise? It's something you have to mentally prepare for when you take a stand against an oppressor?

But then, if you go the ideology route with Silco taking it too far and the riot was Silco's idea, that stunt on the bridge was most likely pre-planned, organized resistance. This means a sizable number in their community, including Felicia and Connol, supported it. Even if Vander had doubts, he went along with it. Otherwise, why does the show open with him beating an enforcer on the bridge? Vander had other options: he could have split the resistance group down the middle by sitting it out and/or trying to stop Silco, neither of which he did!

The letter highlights the loss of Felicia as Vander's triggering event, and Vander admits that there's blood on both their hands. To be honest, I kind of like this because it hints that Silco's violence was acceptable to Vander within the context of revolution, and he thought he could handle the sacrifices required. Ironically, when he couldn't handle it, HIS violence pushed Silco towards any-violence-necessary because you can't trust anyone ever anyway!

Anyway, I know this is the fault of flimsy writing in S2 and what feels like internal censorship with challenging political status quo during production, but two drowning attempts (which for Silco came out of nowhere), followed by expulsion from the Lanes (which he helped build), the guilt of Felicia's death, and the total loss of the friends and community he was fighting for ... I mean, at least Silco's villain era makes complete and total sense???

Ugh honestly I try not to think about the drowning incident or even make sense of it anymore because every time I do, it's just so obvious to me that the writers themselves had no idea what they're doing. Timelines are completely off, character motivations make no sense, so why is it up to me to untangle the mess they made?

I have a huge love hate relationship with season 2 because on one hand, I didn't expect as much Silco crumbs we got in the first place and I'm SO HAPPY we got to see him normally in episode 5 and thriving in episode 7. But the retcon… I was so pissed when Act 2 dropped because the whole bridge incident just stopped making sense like you said.

Then when Act 3 happened, it all clicked together, but not in the "ohhh the story makes sense now" way but in the "oh the writers needed to set up smth previously so this would work." and it completely took me out of it. Like. The writers wanted Vander and Silco to make up with each other. But they don't know how to do that. Let's add some underlying sentimentality between Vander and Silco and Vi's mom, then kill Vi off. That'll make them go back together (along with that STUPID LETTER Vander wrote). Sure that's a bandaid solution and on surface level it works, but I don't think the writers really thought we would think about Silco this much so the moment you peel back the layers nothing makes sense anymore. I think they could've crafted a way more interesting story if they ACTUALLY SAT DOWN AND TRIED to have Silco and Vander reconcile without using Felicia as a crutch, but season 2 has an overarching problem of "lets have all the important things happen offscreen and only imply that they happened" which is just… so lazy…. so I'm not surprised that this happened.

It just weakens so, so many parts of the story and raises way more questions than answer them. Why does Silco pull away and distance himself from Felicia's family? Surely Vi should know him from before? Does Silco only take in Powder because he knew she was Felicia's daughter? Why, WHY does Vander go like "there are worse things than enforcers out there" (implying Silco) in s1 while talking to Benzo????????? when he's apparently felt guilty this whole time ??????? what happened to "I've looked everywhere????" etc etc idk man. from s1 I always thought the bridge incident happened way, way earlier from Felicia dying bc Vi looked like she was about 7 years old during the bridge and around 14 during act one, but then if you see Silco during the s2 warwick flashback he looks like he's 25. maybe 30 at the maximum. aint no way he aged that much in 7 years, in act one he and Vander both feel like they're in their mid 40s idk.

This is lowkey why I kind of only want to draw young Silco.. I love old man yaoi but like. If everything I draw is just flashback version of him, I don't need to worry about logistics of the bridge thing bc it hasn't happened yet lmfao. Or the AU version where everything is solved and no one rlly thinks about that time anymore.

Honestly I've tried to write this response several times trying to spell out my version of the timeline but just. nothing makes any fucking sense. I don't like thinking about how badly the writers fucked up on this part. Silco magically gets an eye injury caused by Vander and they had yaoi divorce but it's fine now. That's just how it is for me and if I think about it even a little more in depth my head will explode and I have better things to do with my time like draw zaundads yaoi

[nick-chinchill]

MOUTHWASHING TIMELINE

Hey Folks! I'm officially on this ride down and, last time I played, I made notes to put together a timeline to help out with people's analysises and theory-crafting :D I've done my best to keep it mostly factual without inserting my own opinions on what might have happened at that point in the game while putting in details that I think are important or noteworthy for the narrative. The 'Chapter' numbers refers to when we see this occur in the game, and the "bizzaro" episodes are listed at the bottom. Naturally, there's spoilers. Hopefully this can be useful to someone out there c:

//BEFORE THE CRASH

7 DAYS (Chapter 2) - The Psyche Evaluations are underway. Anya signs off Curly and gives him a note from Swansea. Curly agrees to do Jimmy's on her behalf. - Curly goes to Utility to see what's up. Daisuke accidently set off the emergency foam and they need his authority to get the axe to free him. He gives it to Swansea, then leaves with Jimmy to do his psyche eval. - The steps to the cockpit extend. Curly wades through red liquid, as scaffolding rises around him and WARNING signs appear. A yellow sun rises, exploding. Curly walks to the cockpit door. - Curly does Jimmy's pysche eval. They have a talk 'off record' about their positions; Jimmy climbing up the ladder while Curly worries about staying 'safe' with his current position. - News arrives from Corporate. Jimmy leaves, and Curly reads the note. 6 DAYS (Chapter 5) - The Birthday Party! Curly is surprised by the crew and prepares the cake. As they sit to eat, he reveals the news - they won't have jobs once they arrive. Anya frets that she has no savings and Jimmy reacts nastily towards Curly, accusing him of abandoning the crew. Curly cuts the cake.

2 DAYS (Chapter 10) - The Night-time screen scene with Anya. She and Curly discuss the night-time screen, and Anya mentions the dead pixel. Curly says he focuses on the bigger picture. Anya questions how long it'll be til they arrive at Earth (8 months-ish) and why there's no locks on the bedroom doors. Curly says; for [SAFETY].

1 DAY (Chapter 14) - The Cockpit talk. Anya's hidden the gun but assures Curly she won't hurt herself. Curly mentions she didn't get checks on her mental health and he should have checked on her. - Anya reveals she's pregnant. Curly promises to talk to Jimmy.

0 DAYS (Chapter 16) - The Day of the Crash. Anya reveals she told Jimmy she's pregnant, and doesn't want him around. Curly rushes to talk to Jimmy. - Curly tries to assure Jimmy they can fix this. Jimmy talks about how this will reflect on them when they get back. He talks about how this could all be remembered as a 'tragedy', and claims he will take care of it. Throughout this chat, the words [TAKE CARE OF IT. KILLS NINETY NINE PERCENT] flash. - Alarms blare. Curly rushes to the cockpit as the ship crashes. THE CRASH (Prologue) - Jimmy crashes the ship. When he leaves, the corridors loop. Polle suddenly appears, mutating each time with the cries of a baby.

//AFTER THE CRASH

2 MONTHS (Chapter 1) - The crew decide to break into the cargo hold. Anya asks Jimmy to give Curly his meds, unable to take the sounds Curly makes. Jimmy does so (it sounds physical). He then gets the Code Scanner and enters the cargo. ---------- (Chapter 4) - The cargo is full of mouthwash. Anya mentions the sugar making it useless as a disinfectant. Swansea starts drinking it.

3 MONTHS (Chapter 6) - Jimmy awakens late one night. Daisuke is still sleeping as Curly moans in pain. Swansea and Anya are talking in the cockpit - Anya was crying. Jimmy leaves to give Curly his meds, lamenting to Curly that he 'knows what the others are thinking'. This time it sounds violent and Curly sobs afterwards.

4 MONTHS (Chapter 8) - Daisuke is drunk on the floor, in despair and talks about his mother. Polle has been destroyed in the lounge. Anya considers drinking the mouthwash, but says it won't 'fix anything'. She mentions there's medicine in a cabinet they can reach if the foam is cleared. Swansea is grooving and, when approached for the axe, breaks the sunset screen. Jimmy retrieves the meds and shouts at Anya about being told to do things. After he approaches Curly, talking at him about the pressures of being captain. He gives him his meds. It doesn't sound violent, but Curly still sobs after.

5 MONTHS (Chapter 11) - Anya locks herself in the med bay with Curly. Daisuke is worried and alerts Jimmy. Anya says she'll do 'what [Jimmy] said she should have done'. Swansea is drunk outside Utility and won't let them enter, claiming it's full of the emergency foam ---------- (Chapter 13) - Jimmy decides to drug Swansea with a spiked cocktail. He uses the last of the disinfectant for it. - Upon entering Utility, it's not very foamy at all and there's one working cyropod. Jimmy assumes Swansea was saving it for himself and pressures Daisuke to climb into the unsafe vent. - Daisuke ultimately agrees and is critically injured, but makes it into the med bay.

8 HOURS UNTIL JUDGEMENT (Chapter 12) - Daisuke is critically injured. Swansea says they need disinfectant (it's been used) and goes to search the med bay. There's a smear effect where Curly is, and the sunset screen is now a WARNING logo. - Upon approaching the cargo, Jimmy sees Daisuke's grave. Upon scanning it, it reveals a path of blood, leading into a maze. A monstrous horse that can only be seen with the scanner hunts Jimmy. - Jimmy retrieves a bottle of mouthwash from the cargo [TAKE CARE OF IT. RESPONSIBILITY] and uses it on Daisuke's wounds. Daisuke screams.

6 HOURS UNTIL JUDGEMENT (Chapter 15) - Daisuke is still in immense pain. Swansea takes the axe and gives him a calming speech, before mercy killing him. - Jimmy blows up at Swansea, claiming he could have fixed this and accusing Swansea of holding onto the last cyropod for himself. - Swansea rebutes him, revealing he's talked to Anya who told him 'all sorts of things'. - Jimmy goes to med bay where Anyas corpse is now visible and retrieves the gun. Curly laughs when he gets hold of it. Swansea charges at Jimmy with the axe. ---------- (Chapter 9) - Jimmy secures the cockpit door with rope and a metal pipe. Swansea breaks the glass to get in to kill Jimmy.

1 HOUR UNTIL JUDGEMENT (Chapter 17) - Jimmy hosts his own birthday party with the corpses of the crew. They clap and call for a speech. He brings Curly and lays him on the table, giving a speech about how he forgives him. He takes the knife and cuts into Curly's leg. Curly screams.

0 HOURS UNTIL JUDGEMENT (Chapter 21) - Jimmy lifts Curly from the table. There's nothing around them but the table and the door. He carries him to Utility. - Jimmy places Curly in the cyropod. He claims they've fixed it... he fixed it. - Jimmy shoots himself. - The cyropod begins to freeze as credits roll.

//TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

SECTION 1 (Chapter 3) - Let's watch Television! There's a lot on - pro capitalism cartoons, space footage, a show about atoms, footage of a meat plant, a skeleton dancing, static, and an ad for Dragonbreath X Mouthwash... SECTION 2 (Chapter 7) - Cake with Curly! Jimmy and Curly sit and talk, before Curly encourages Jimmy to cut the cake. Jimmy leaves and finds an axe in the cockpit, wedged in the captains chair. When he returns, Curly is laid on the table. He swings the axe at him. SECTION 3 (Chapter 18) - Enter the Vents. Daisuke turns and leaves - approaching him snaps the vents into red lighting and leaves a hibiscus flower on the floor. - Progressing reveals a sign saying 'No Turning Back Now'. As Jimmy backs away, he crosses a small pile of hibiscus flowers, a gameboy, a pair of pink dumbells and a pile of arms. Another vent has a note saying 'Responsibility'. - Jimmy enters the hallways, but they rotate into a fall. He falls towards an eye-like hole, lined with hibiscus', into a pit full of Polle posters. He falls further, into a room with an open vent in a wall covered in axes. - The vent is full of foam, exposed wires and metal bars. Another hibiscus flower is hidden on the path. He falls through once more - He lands in front of Swansea, tied to a chair. Jimmy finds the gun on the floor and picks it up, pointing it at Swansea and firing. - They're now in a cemetary. If Jimmy is killed by Swansea, he revives in a tomb with Daisuke's picture framed with hibiscus flowers. Jimmy ultimately shoots Swansea. - They face each other - Swansea on the chair, Jimmy before him. Swansea gives Jimmy a speech about his life - the best days of his life were his days as an alcoholic. Jimmy claims he can still fix things, before lifting the gun to shoot him.

SECTION 4 (Chapter 19) - Swansea is dead. - The corridor out of Utility elongates into an endless spiral. Curly watches from under the floor, then as hundreds of eyes on the walls. - The corridor becomes flesh. Jimmy exits out of Curly's mouth and approaches Curly on an operating table, in front of a television. The television plays a cartoon about a party with a cake. It stops - the word FEAST appears. - Jimmy takes a piece of Curly's leg and feeds it to him. Curly won't swallow until the images on the screen align, requiring the gears on his body to be turned. Finally, Curly swallows. - HELP ME appears on the screen. - Jimmy walks through space to approach Curly, who sits on fire. They talk; Jimmy breaks down and apologises to Curly.

SECTION 5 (Chapter 20) - In the vents, a flesh mass awaits. Using an ultrasound machine, Jimmy inspects it. He ultimately gets the image of a baby on the screen. - The mass opens it's eyes and opens it's mouth - a horse creature emerges, crying like a baby. - The mouthwashing slogans repeat, amidst [I HOPE THIS HURTS]. - In the vents, the creature rushes through, seeking out Jimmy and crying. - Jimmy walks through a corridor full of the crew's employee IDs. They cover the floor, the walls, the air. It leads to a stair case, with bottles of mouthwash falling down. - At the top, Polle waits. Jimmy speaks with Polle, who proceeds to tell him why he sucks. - Jimmy insists that he and Curly can still both be heroes, that things can still be fixed and made right. Polle asks why, if that's true, why is he "still so concerned with him".

[slaaverin]

Hey Slavv

you’re video edit was wonderful, thank you for sharing it with us

I just wondered what you thought about the episode as a whole? Did the baby conversation make you take pause? I hope they are able to stay together despite not being able to be parents in the future.

Ohh thank you so much 💜

This question is quite hard for me to answer properly.

First of all, I really loved it. I had a very peculiar and quite strong reaction to it. I'll try to put it in words the best I can.

I'll start with a simple thing: in my 7 years of being a jikooker, that is all I ever wanted to see from them.

Being relaxed, happy, joyous, authentic, confortable.

So this felt like some kind of apoteose. Everything came full circle. For them & for me.

When you think about it, nothing really happened in this episode, they were doing the most mundane things, but there was this vibe of the most comfort, the most warmth, the most quiet and simple love, that my heart was deeply touched by it and after it hit me I really had no words to describe the feeling I had. It's deep stuff lol

Somehow they always exceed my expectations. I'm not those people who say "I expect nothing so I won't get disappointed". No, I expect things. But not because I want them to do certain stuff, more because I feel I know them sufficiently, and some of their patterns, and I see them within the love umbrella, so it gets easier and easier to predict what they might do or not. How crazy this is that they check absolutely all the boxes everytime and confirm every theory? I'm trying to stay sane of mind over here but no they want me to be the most delulu lol

Of course the ambiance really helped the episode to feel dream-like. And we know how much Japan means to them. JK must have said 384737 times how much he loved it and how happy he was.

Nothing was hanging on their shoulders anymore, no burdens, and I think that's why they were able to enjoy it this much.

It's quite insane when you think about it how fluid this all was. Like nothing felt out of place, conversation flowed easily, they are on the same wavelength about everything, they spoke openly, they had fun and let their inner child play, everything felt SO EASY. Their dynamic is just perfect, no hiccups, it just fits, jives, it clicks.

Now I am wondering how the hell they are not already a human representation of the Cosmic couple because if there is supposed to be a next level to this relationship I can't even imagine what that would look like. How much better can it get? It's so full of love already. Anyway I digress

About the child talk, firstly I was expecting this talk in Sapporo indeed. It was obvious they would at least mention it. So when I saw the scene I was already prepared mentally.

It doesn't make me worry about jikook because I think that if at some point they will want a child, they'll get to have one. Jimin or Jungkook can firstly adopt as a single parent (a bill has been passed about this in Korea recently) and then raise the child together unofficially. Or they can use a surrogate mother from overseas or something. You know they are filthy rich so I think if they REALLY want to, they would find a way.

But JK isn't ready about it yet lmao leave this man alone for now 😂

When and if it is the right time for the both of them there will be solutions so I'm not worried. This moment was really cute 🥰

Who knows what the future holds for them. Many years before we would have never expected to see them even shirtless, we would have not believed we would see their dynamic up this close in a show like this.

Things can evolve quickly. Who knows how things will develop with BTS as well, for how long will they remain a group?

It's true they are getting old, in "idol age".

Who knows how the country will evolve too?

I trust Jimin&Jungkook to make decisions about their future that will benefit them and their relationship. Maybe it will involve a child, maybe not. But I personally don't think they would break up because of this. You can see how precious their relationship is for them.

But only time will tell if I'm right.

Anyway, I could go over all the scenes of this episode and talk about it for hours.

I know this was an ephemeral dream for them this trip, like a time capsule, a bubble of normalcy, where everything is and means suddenly more. There was nothing and everything they needed at the same time. Ahh, so beautiful 🥺

I wish their lives were all the time like this, but it is what it is, they had to come down from the cloud, and face their duty, then it will be their schedule, and things will go back to regular program.

But for now I don't mind losing myself in the dream with them, and float, and pretend everything is the way they want it to be.

"All for your happiness" Jimin said

If they are happy, I am happy.

Let's enjoy those next 2 eps, I think we're in for other surprises.

Thank you for your ask 💜

[starstruckbyacomet]

Goodbye for Now

Almost 2 months ago I posted a list of possible hurdles that Oliver had warned us about (link):

It's possibly because of something from Tommy's past (we might get a Tommy Begins of some sort).

It possibly would happen through episodes 8x05 and 8x06.

Buck will go to Bobby, Maddie, and Eddie for support during that period.

Buck might find out about Tommy's past (being a racist and mysoginist a-hole) and couldn't accept it, or

Tommy might meet Carla. Carla might tell Buck that Tommy had lied to Abby and used her as a beard in the past. Abby was hurt badly because of it, and Buck couldn't accept it.

Buck might break up with Tommy.

Buck might try to date another man or a woman (if they want to emphasize that Buck is bisexual, not gay).

When I made the above list, I half-jokingly wrote down the worst posssibilities I could think of. The purpose of my post back then is to prepare other Tevan shippers who at the time had doubt about the relationship. I told them that grown-up relationships had all sorts of challenges, including break-ups. I also told them to watch Disney Princess movies if they couldn't handle it.

Who knew that almost 2 months later I have to swallow my own pills?

As contradictive as it sounds, I'm not happy that my predictions come true, including the possibility of Buck dating men & women again (prediction #7) which could happen based on interview with Oliver Stark (link)

Will Buck and Tommy make up?

Negative sign:

There are two interviews with Lou which I still refused to read, because the writers used to be Buddie baiters. But according to fans who have read it, the break up seems final.

Positive signs:

A)) 9-1-1 official Instagram account wouldn't follow Lou in the first place if he wouldn't stay for long term. Last time I check, 9-1-1 account still following Lou.

B)) Things that I wrote in my previous post still stand (link).

Tim and Oliver has said they wanted Buck to get out of the relationship hamster wheel and have a steady meaningful one instead.

Unlike Abby, whom they broke up with Buck because Tim had difficulties in writing her interaction with other 118 family members, Tommy has known most of the 118 family even before Buck does. There is no difficulty in making scripts where Tommy interacts with other 118 members without Buck's presence.

And the most important reason is: THE RATING IS HIGH when Tevan relationship is going strong.

My conclusion: There are 2 options:

The break-up is only temporary, to spice things up. Unfortunately, the timing is really bad because it is aired after the fuck-up US election result 🤦.

Tommy is moving to the new 9-1-1 spin-off, which probably located in Hawaii (link). If this happens, the break-up might be permanent, but it will be good for Lou's career.

What's next?

Although I think Tommy will come back in the 9-1-1 universe, I'm still upset. The 2nd term of Trump and Tevan's break-up happened within the same week! WTF??? I refuse to deal with both at the same time.

This is a list of what I will and will not do, and what I've done:

I will not harrass Tim Minear, Oliver Stark, or even the show on social media. I will not post my disappointment on unrelated social media contents. We have experienced how annoying it was when toxic Buddie fans did it. I refuse to do the same. I suggest other Tevan fans too. We are better than that.

I have unfollowed all 9-1-1 related social media accounts, both official and not. Yes, it is included 911bts and 911cast Tumblr accounts. I think this is a healthy way to voice my disappointment and to maintain my mental health.

I will stop watching the show until Tommy is (or, is officially announced to be) back on screen. The only exception will be when they show Bathena's new house for the first time, because I've been waiting to see it. Other than that, just no. Not even when Eddie reunites with Chris, if that happens before Tommy is back on screen. This step might even save me a few bucks, actually 😅.

I will stop engaging with 9-1-1 related contents on the internet. I will not read any articles about the show. I will not comment, post, reblog or do anything with contents about 9-1-1 on the internet.

I will stop reading 9-1-1 fics because I never comfortable following ships which are against canon. That's why I don't ship Buddie. And now that Tevan broke-up, I cannot engage with AUs where they are still together.

If you think Tevan will make up, why do you quit the show? Because:

I consume entertainment contents to be entertained, not to be depressed. I used to skip sad chapters on novels, and only read them when I'm ready. Buck without Tommy is a sad chapter for me, so I skip it.

This is my way to voice my disappointment in a healthy way. Things that matter the most for the show are rating/viewership and rating/viewership-related metrics. My actions may not have significant impacts to the show, but I am satisfied, nonetheless. Especially, after Oliver's comment that he has actively asked Tim Minear to 'Let Buck F–k' men and women (link). His ask is not only a regression to slutty Buck 1.0 (which we thought he has grown out of), but also strengthening the stereotype that bisexual people are easy to fuck around. A stereotype that a lot of bisexual people want to shred.

Tim Minear and Oliver Stark have the right to make the story as they see fit. This show is not customed to my preference. I'm very much aware of that. This is a "love it or leave it" product. So, I choose to leave it. For now.

To my followers: As I mentioned in my account, you can unfollow me. I use Tumblr as a scrapbook, not to gain followers. I was actually surprised and felt a bit guilty when people start following me, because I don't create arts, gifs, or fics. So, feel free to unfollow me. No hard feeling.

To other Tevan shippers: I know this is beyond disappointing, but please keep your online behavior in check. Please keep in mind that if you post your disapointment in social media, toxic Buddie shippers will eat you alive. Even if you don't, Buddie shippers will be gloating all over the internet. If you can't handle it, I suggest to forgo any interactions in 9-1-1 social media, at least temporarily.

Special thanks to my fellow Tevan fans and the lovely Buddietommy multishippers whom I've met during this journey. I hope we'll meet again. What a roller-coaster ride.

Now, back to Disney Princess movies... 😂

[the-guilty-writer]

No Matter What

Request (from anon): hiii if its not too much trouble could you do Reid x daughter reader where she had BPD and she has a anger breakdown??

Spencer Reid x daughter!reader

Summary: Spencer helps his daughter with BPD through an anger breakdown.

A/N: Huge thank you to @huffufflejoy for beta/sensitivity reading and advising me on this work. Your help is greatly appreciated! Now for my usual disclaimer before my pieces that heavily involve any neurodivergent topic: I try my best to potray mental illness in the most accurate yet sensitive way possible. Please let me know if you have concerns or issues with my work. It's important to note that everyone experiences mental illness in different ways and this may not be indicative of the experience of everyone with BPD.

CW: Reader has BPD, anger breakdown, talks of schizophrenia, self-loathing, small amount of physical violence, reader is shorter than Spencer

---

Spencer had learned long before you were born that understanding from knowledge and understanding from experiencing were two different things.

No matter how much he had read about schizophrenia, he could never truly understand what his mom was experiencing. No matter how much he'd read about being a dad, it did not prepare him for actually being one. And no matter how many people he talked to, articles he read, or data he went through, he would never truly understand what it was like for you to live with BPD.

At first, his research led him to believe that he might be able to understand some of the experience. After his dad leaving him at such a young age, Elle's resignation, Gideon leaving with nothing but a letter to say goodbye, and Emily's fake death, Spencer always had an underlying concern that the people in his life were going to leave.

But to him it was just that- an underlying concern. Like how he prefered paper over computers, but wasn't paranoid about it like his mother had been during an episode in which she threw the TV out of the house. Or how he might tell someone "My daughter is my whole world", but if he didn't hear from you for a day his whole world didn't seem to fall apart.

Nothing about your experience would ever be comparable to his. All he could do was try to understand.

Spencer had just woken up when he heard the shattering. He got out of bed, trying not to get his limbs tangled in the sheets, but still moving faster than he usually did at 7 AM. When he threw his bedroom door open, he took in the sight before him. His genius brain tryed it's best to calculate what move to make next.

You were standing in the small kitchen, surrounded by pieces of porcelain. White knuckles were threaded through your hair, threatening to pull the strands out by the root. A look of distress was plastered on your face as your chest heaved. Spencer only hoped that he'd gotten here before the anger turned into a blackout.

"(Y/N), Sweetie," Spencer cooed. He walked toward you, careful to avoid the broken bowl. "Are you okay?"

"No, I'm not okay!" Your voice was shrill in your exasperatedly irritable state. "I- I dropped the bowl and it broke, and now I can't make cupcakes for Henry, and I broke the bowl- I'm so sorry-"

Spencer tried to change the subject in an effort to calm you. "You were going to hang out with Henry today?"

"No, of course no. Why else would I be trying to make him cupcakes?" You snarled at your dad with degrading sarcasm. "All my other friends hate me and now he probably will now too and- and the bowl!"

It wasn't an unusual thing for you to say. Keeping surface-level friendships alive could be difficult with BPD. People didn't understand where the swing of emotions came from, and how you couldn't control the things you said when the mental bomb went off. They didn't understand why you would share a hobby with them, and then a week later, drop it completely. Even when you explained BPD, used your coping skills, and tried your hardest, it was difficult just to exist in society.

Henry made it easier. The two of you had been friends since you were small children. He took his time to understand you. He could calm your nerves, help you cope, give you reassurance, set healthy boundaries.

Still, your dad was you favorite person; your safe place. Spencer made you feel secure in a way that no one else could. It didn't matter how high you flew or how hard you fell, he was the constant presence in your life that you needed. That's why the underlying fear of losing him could make you spiral.

"It's broken! It's broken and I'm broken!" The sarcasm slipped away behind your anger.

"You're not broken," Spencer cooed.

"Yes I am!" You screamed at him. Tears of fury streamed down your face. The look in your eyes was enough to tell your dad that you were close to a breakdown, and he couldn't help but look nervously at the shards still littered on the ground.

Spencer took a risk, walking forward. He got to you in three carefully calculated strides.

"Come here," he whispered, though you were only inches apart and his arms were almost all the way around you.

"No, no-" you muttered. Your eyes were shut tight, arms pulled to your chest as if they were a shield over your heart.

Spencer wrapped you in a hug against your wishes, only pulling you tigher when your fists came towards his chest. Your muttering and sobbing and squirming continued as he held you as tightly as he could.

"I love you."

"I'm telling the truth."

"I'm not leaving you."

"You're worthy."

"I will always be here."

Spencer didn't know if the words actually helped, but he liked to think they did. As the pendulum of emotion began to fall and you stopped fighting in his arms, the only sound in the kitchen became the mantras he whispered and your heavy breathing.

"I-I'm sorry, dad," your words were barely desipherable between dry sobs. "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I didn't mean- I'm so sorry. Please-"

"It's okay." Spencer kept his voice calm, soothing, reassuring. "It's only a bowl."

"I broke it and I got so-" you choked out the words as if saying them was physically painful.

Spencer had to remind himself that it was. Just like the way a panic attack could make someone's heart race or their palms sweat, the humiliation of being unable to control your emotions made your throat close. He wished it didn't.

"It's all my fault- I'm sorry."

Spencer looked down at your puffy face. Your lip trembled with anxiety. Salt stained cheeks rested in his palms. In the glassy look of your eyes he could see his own reflection, his own expression. It matched exactly how he felt; concern for you that came from pure love. He only wished you'd see that there was nothing in this world that could make him leave you willfully. There was nothing in this world that could take that love.

"I promise it's okay," he kept his voice quiet. "Can we clean it up together?"

You nodded.

"I'll be here so you're safe," he reassured you. But it was also for himself.

You nodded again.

"Okay." He gently let go of your face. "Let's clean up."

Together, the two of you carefully swept up the pieces of procelain. It took no more than two minutes to do, but Spencer couldn't help but spew a few interesting facts. They made you feel better, more relaxed.

"In Japan they use a technique called kintsugi to repair pottery," he explained. "Craftsmen take the broken bits and mend them together with gold."

The both of you rose to your feet, you with a broom and Spencer with the dustpan. "It actually makes the object stronger and more beautiful." He disposed of the broken bowl in the trash.

"Is this your way of telling me that every time I break I get stronger and more beuatiful?" you asked. It wasn't snarky or sarcastic- it was exhausted. "Because I don't feel that way."

Your dad took the broom from you, putting it back in the small storage closet. "Not quite," he said, then turned. "Because a lot of people believe the practice rose from the philosophy of wabi-sabi, which encourages people to look for and appreciate imperfection."

You blinked at him. "I'm confused."

He wrapped you in a hug. "It's my way of telling you that I'm not going anywhere. It doesn't matter to me how strong you are or how beautiful you are- how perfect or imperfect. I'm always going to be here, and I'm always going to love you, no matter what."

[tategaminu]

SOOO the title for 05X6 dropped and I'm going feral

Be prepared to hear my long ass theory about this episode and why it will be the rayllum fully gets back together episode (I'm annoying)

Of course we already know season 6 will mirror S3 or at least that's what it looks like. "Moonless Night" is episode 5‚ the same one when Callum and Rayla first got together‚ just as 4 had the title of the place they reach. (The Midnight Desert‚ The Starcrapper)

I have to add‚ just as season 3 had Nyx‚ there's this sky girl called Astrid who may act as the Nyx parallel‚ who knows.

I don't use Discord but my info provider (hello there) told me Devon said episode five would be emotionally heavy and a favourite. A person said ep2 of season 5 were their favourite because the cute rayllum moments and Devon said "until 5 of 6" 🧐

Aparently, it was confirmed by writers this episode would DESTROY people KILL EVEN, well maybe not that but you get me. We know how emotional these two blorbos are for each other right? and we for them. In Discord, a person said ep2 of season 5 were their favourite because the cute rayllum moments and Devon said "until 5 of 6" 🧐

Now let's go to the juicy part. The title. This title is absolutely loaded. like wth. We all know whose favourite girl is related to the moon right? of course we are worried. But I think she's gonna be ok, in the end at least, let me explain.

Of course I'm asuming this scene from the teaser may be from episode 5. We see Callum falling in a moonless night but I'm guessing the title isn't that literal. I think Callum is falling emotionally and literally just as he has before for Rayla. He fell in love with her‚ he fell off a cliff for her and then fell emotionally when she left. The sky he is in is dark‚ no moon‚ representing his own mental state without Rayla. Rayla left him at night just as Callum is falling in the night (omg)

Callum had a moonless night every day for two years because his guiding moon wasn't in his life. I think they may talk about it or it will affect Callum in this episode some way.

Note that the teaser opens with this scene, next we have Aaravos saying "we are all of us, stardust, held together by love for an instant"

(wow subtle foreshadowing you guys)

and the teaser ends with Callum losing his love wings. The wings he got for her. Basically opening with a rayllum scene and closing with a "rayllum" scene ya know

In Chasing Shadows Rayla specifically mentions the stars in his eyes‚ when he does the big speech:

Now‚ what do I think will happen?

EP3: They visit the Silvergroove? just like in ep 3x3. Maybe visit Ethari? "heeey your husband is alive ok bye". My own guess is that they will get the boat from the leaked scene there since there are moon animals in that thing and reach the frozen ship with that.

Ep4: they reach destination and meet the sky elves, Astrid included, with no hiccups. ba dum tss

Ep5: Basically 05x3 but different and sexier

Whatever Callum is about to do I highly doubt Rayla will agree with it because you know how they are (me getting hurt is ok but not you). He convinces her like he did in TTM‚

But this time Rayla is the one to say it

I think that even if Callum promises he will be ok‚ he will have a "I want you to know" moment again and that may lead to talking about her leaving. This may derive into a kinda argument. Callum and Rayla can't continue their talk because they get interrumped (once again) but the memories of a broken heart and feelings affects him badly. He's just emotionally distraught and loses his love wings because whatever. I doubt Rayla isn't seeing any of this, you know how she is. She didn't spend 7 hours watching him sleep to actually not watch this like c'mon

This time Rayla may be the one saving Callum from falling (literally and metaphorically). Now yeah Rayla can't fly but maybeeee

A: she calls out for his name, "waking" him up

B: she just jumps (im going for this one) like Callum did for her. She jumps, not knowing if it's going to work, wakes him up after catching him‚ Callum is able to get his wings back and fly them both into safety, Callum gets his love wings again for her but this time she's being the savior (in the most part). Maybe even completing whatever mission they ask as well. TOGETHER.

After this we may get a Rayla is a hero speech or this time Callum is a hero speech, I don't know‚ I think it would be more fitting if it's from Callum and the hero Callum speech is from Rayla to her parents. Whateve, they finally have their three sesaon dragged conversation and they both kiss like in S3 but maybe reversed this time (Rayla kissing first and apologizing and Callum kissing her next) and they fully come back together :'). I dont think we will get an I love you until ep 9 but we won't really need it here right? we already know!

The episode ends with them kissing under the moon. Moonless Night ending with with a moon night (metaforically and literally)

Now‚ this is just my own guess and it sounds very very self-indulgent (heh) but a girl can dream

[agatharkn3ss]

Episodes Roundup

I needed something to occupy my time, while waiting for the next Agatha dose! So here are the writers credited for writing each of the episodes (mind you, it doesn't mean other writers weren't involved). You can recognise a few names as they also wrote some of Wandavision episodes.

While we can't know the plots yet, I've included the rumours/clues so far, it might help preparing yourself mentally as some of these writers are known for absolutely heart wrenching scenes. The episode fonts are likely clues as well.

Draw your own conclusions, but for me the biggest alarm is the fact that Jac Schaeffer co-wrote Agatha's finale with none other than Laura Donney - who wrote penultimate episode of Wandavision - you know, the one where we learn Agatha's background and where she takes Wanda on the emotional "Road", making her re-live the trauma and heartache. So yeah, be prepared for emotional rollercoaster of a finale!

Ep1. Seekest thou the Road - Jac Schaeffer (the show runner and producer, also wrote the first and last episodes of Wandavision)

Ep2. Circle sewn in fate/Unlock thy hidden gate - Laura Donney (wrote ep.8 of Wandavision - explaining both Agatha and Wanda's stories)

Ep3. Through many miles of tricks and trials - Cameron Squires (wrote ep.7 of Wandavision - the one where the stories are told through interviews with the characters and where we had the big Agatha reveal)

Ep.4 If I can't reach you, let my song teach you (fire trial, Alice-centred) - Giovanna Sarquis (not connected with Wandavision, wrote ep.5 of Griselda if that helps)

Ep.5 Title TBC (likely about the 80s pj party horror with ouija board and possessed Agatha, quite possibly Teen-centred so a trial for the Familiar? Judging by the poster maybe we also find out how Rio is involved - my money is on them being Billy and Lady Death) - Laura Monti (seems like she's a relatively new kid on the writers' block. But she was Jac's assistant on Wandavision and is famously credited for Vision's line "What is grief if not love preserving?")

One of the next three episodes (ep6?) is going to be about the Wizard of Oz, centred around Lilia's tarot trial (Air). Another episode (possibly no.7) is rumored to be Agatha's backstory - so the Spirit trial. And one episode (probably 8, judging from the font) will be Earth trial but seems to be focused on Jen - where they will be in this sterile looking room, like an operating theatre?

Ep.6 Title TBC - Jason Rostovsky (not seen any writing credits, but he was an assistant on quite a few horror movies - e.g. "Ouija: Origins of evil", "The Purge: Election year", "Insidious: Chapter 3". So I'm expecting the episode to be dark)

Ep.7 Title TBC - Cameron Squires (same as ep.3)

Ep.8 Title TBC - Peter Cameron (he wrote ep.5 &6 of Wandavision - the ones with boys growing up, fake Pietro and Halloween)

Ep. 9 Title TBC - Jac Schaeffer and Laura Donney (!!!)

[this is a repost since Tumblr suddenly decided they don't like me using images and won't share my posts in search. You will find this same post with episode images directly on my blog]

Edit: Tumblr has now red flagged my original post that had the episodes posters in it, so it's no longer available. No explanation as to why they would find official Disney+ promotional material so offensive.

[bre1995]

Fellow Traveler Scenes that make me sad

Hello everyone again!! This post is going to be another lengthy one, but I hope that you enjoy <3

(Yes I know there are a lot of these moments, but these are the ones from pretty much each episode that just shatter me each time)

In episode 1 when Marcus shows up you can see the scared look on Hawks face and then when Marcus is talking about Tim. I know a lot of things went down and Hawk kept his distance, but that doesn't mean he still wasn't scared.

Episode 2 when Hawk is making Skippy write that letter. You know 99% of those words are for Tim and you can see Hawk getting emotional when saying them and when Tim stops writing you know that he realizes that those words aren't just for Mary they are for Tim and that just shatters me.

Episode 3 when Hawk goes to Tim's apartment and even though Mary and Marcus had been telling him how bad things were, Hawk witnessing it for himself completely overwhelmed him and you could see it on his face. Also, when he excuses himself to the bathroom and almost starts crying because he realizes that he will be losing his Skippy sooner than he thinks. Then later in the restaurant when Tim is singing 'Perhaps' he looks at Hawk and some of the words he's singing and the force in which he says them you know are directed at Hawk and then he gets upset when he realizes he has embarrassed Hawk.

Episode 4 When Hawk has to take the lie detector test. Him having to mentally and physically prepare himself so that he can pass. Him lying about loving Tim (which was also was the longest pause of any of the questions), but that is also one of my favorite parts because he was wearing the tie Tim got him for Christmas, but the fact that he had to lie just to be able to keep his job. Just broke my heart, but also talking to Marcus you could tell that he felt completely guilty and broke his own heart. Also, in episode 4 which I know it's in the beginning when Hawk and Tim get into that huge fight and then at the end of the episode he apologizes, but Tim isn't there, but also him saying Skip instead of Skippy. There's just something about it that I can't explain.

Episode 5 Hawk not only breaks his own heart, but Tims too when he tells Tim that he's going to ask Lucy to marry him. When Hawk says that you can SEE it on his face that he doesn't want this to be happening and doesn't want to do it, but he FEELS like it's what he has to do. Also, Tim you can tell was absolutely shattered too and I know that's why he ends up signing up for the army. In this same episode when Hawk and Tim are in the bell tower and Hawk goes "Skippy, I didn't raise my boy to be a soldier." Hawk is so sad, broken, and doesn't want this to be happening. Also, Tim's "promise you won't write." These two love each other so much and it just pains me they can't be together the way they want to.

Episode 6 when Skippy comes to the house and looks in from the trees and sees Hawk with his family. I do love Tims bond with Jackson and the conversation they had about Hawk. In that moment you can tell Tim has no resentment fully towards Hawk at all and understands how he has to love and HOW he loves.

Episode 7 I know the threesome was sloppy and everything, but the small little moments between Skippy and Hawk just make me tear up. When Tim starts rubbing Hawks back and plays with his earlobe like he's always done thats my sign of him saying "I'm here for you and I've got you." The next part in this clip is when Hawk sees Jacksons picture and fully shuts down and starts to panic. Then him starting to break down and apologizing because he feels like he can't cry and Tim tells him its ok and then thats when Hawk fully lets go. Hawks "Let me die." Literally SHATTERS my heart. Hawk is so broken and hurt and that just makes me hurt. But when he full on has the breakdown is when I lost it. You can just see all the pain and anguish on his face. He really did need Skippy. At the end of the episode even though he has no one to blame, but himself, Hawk starting to panic and freak out about Skippy leaving and saying he's free of Hawk really got to him. He felt like he lost him again forever. Then the flash to the present of Hawk at the hospital while Skippy is in the hospital bed. The fear and sadness on his face. But that kiss to the forehead in a public place just makes me tear up so, so hard. It was the first time Hawk had done something like that in a public setting.

Finally episode 8 the one that never fails to make me SOB every time. Tim telling Hawk that he woke up not knowing who he was and Hawk saying "Timothy David Laughlin, that adorable Catholic Boy from Staten Island." Tim returning from the army and reuniting with Hawk (yeah I know that's not sad, but it is special) and him almost getting his dream job. Recommended by Hawk and then skip to the naked slow dance (which is just so beautiful and emotional in itself) you see Hawk so at peace and happy then he's ever been and then Tim says they will be colleagues and see each other every day. You could immediately see the panic and fear on Hawks face. Then you get Hawk turning Tim in and then crying to Mary (rightfully so). Then going to the hospital to see baby Jackson and immediately thats when we and Tim find out why Hawk did what he did, but it doesn't make it any easier. Skip to Hawk climbing into Tim's hospital bed and holding him and Tim saying "I feel like I'm fading away. I'm disappearing a little every day." the way he says it just shatters me (I'm crying even typing it). Then eventually Hawk asking if he owns a tuxedo, them at the gala, and of course Tim's speech to Hawk. "I have loved you my whole life. I've never loved anyone, but you. You were my great, consuming love. And most people don't get one of those. I did. I have no regrets." That whole part of the speech makes me cry every time. Add on top of Hawk's kiss and Tim savoring it and then teasing Hawk like he always does. Tim wiping away Hawk's tears. Hawk telling Tim that he wants to show up for Tim, but Tim (understandably) sends him home. Even though Tim is his home. The "Hey Skippy! Promise you won't write" "I won't" being their last words to each other. My goodness let the tears roll. (Again crying while typing this). Skip to the Aids Quilt and Hawk finds Tims square and Kimberly coming up to him. Hawk trying to hide his tears and then just letting them flow with the quote "Sweetheart, he wasn't my friend. He was the man I loved." *Cue more tears from me* I know it took him until after Tim died to admit it, but I choose to believe that in that moment Tim was looking down and would be so, so proud of Hawk. I'm also glad that he has Kimberly and she's still sticking by his side. But the show ending on that note is so beautiful and heartbreaking all at the same time. I know this was another long one, but I'm so passionate about this show. Please feel free to share your favorite moments or even add to this!! I am up for conversation anytime :)

[cabintober]

Welcome to the cabin, dear travelers.

So you may have heard of this little podcast called Cabin Tales. It's pretty good. I think you'll enjoy it.

Now since there are quite a number of people who are both Cabin Tales fans and enjoy whump, I figured it would be appropriate to launch a fandom based whump event surrounding our little cabin dwellers!

The event won't start until October so you've got all the time in the world to prepare. I hope you can impress Death (and the Sailor too) with what your minds can cook up. :3

Rules

Anyone can participate. You can do the prompts in any medium whether it be art, fics, cosplays, anything.

The prompts for each day has to fit with the Cabin Tales theme.

The prompts can be used after the event ends.

AI generated content is not allowed.

Be sure to tag the posts with #cabintoberday1 and the prompts you're using (#electrocution, #framing, #forced to watch)

Use the appropriate trigger warnings/content warnings

You can also tag the @cabintober blog as well.

Prompts

Day 1 - "I did all of this for you!" (Stalking/captivity/basement)

Day 2 - "I see dead people." (Ghosts/Hallucinations/"Who are you talking to?")

Day 3 - "Who would you like to speak with today?" (Trapped/Bloody bag/"I didn't get to say goodbye!")

Day 4 - "What am I?" (Riddles/Mind games/Body mutilation)

Day 5 - "Take my soul." (Soul sucking/Attempted suicide/"The collector will come today.")

Day 6 - "There is power in the blood." (Freaky weather/Falling body parts/"The National Weather Service has...")

Day 7 - "I've hated myself since that day." (Cruise ship/Drowning/"Where's the lifeboat?")

Day 8 - "You're more beautiful than I ever could've imagined." (Corn maze/Sacrifice/Non-human whumpee)

Day 9 - "What do you know about the gods?" (Apocalypse/Mental institution/"You need to die!")

Day 10 - "What a nice Christmas tree." (Vigilante justice/Betrayal/Non-con drugging)

Day 11 - "A symbol of our love." (Car accident/Fire/"Love at first sight.")

Day 12 - "Call 911! What are you waiting for?!" (Drug overdose/Body horror/Thorns)

Day 13 - "Here comes the airplane." (Cannibalism/Sudden illness/Filling dinner)

Day 14 - "The midnight hour." (Graveyard/Dead all along/Buried alive)

Day 15 - "We need to play or we all die!" (Electrocution/Forced to watch/Burns)

Day 16 - "Not the room!" (Childhood trauma/Nightmares/"I can't escape.")

Day 17 - "You do the things you do to feel alive." (Shooting in broad daylight/Framing/News reports)

Day 18 - "Could you come outside?" (Lured out/Eldritch abomination/Left to die)

Day 19 - "What are our chances of reaching HQ from here?" (Trapped in space/Alien colony/Eye gouging)

Day 20 - "I'm a scarecrow, kid." (Cryptid attack/Trampled on/"It's nice in here.")

Day 21 - "We can't trust you. None of us can!" (Trust issues/Anxiety/Panic attacks)

Day 22 - "I told him to sit down and attach his belt." (Impalement)

Day 23 - "Happy anniversary, my love." (Emotional abuse/Gaslighting/Stockholm syndrome)

Day 24 - What is your favorite Cabin Tales character?

Day 25 - What is your favorite Cabin Tales episode?

Day 26 - "I'm not feeling too great." (Motion sickness/Alcohol poisoning/Seizure)

Day 27 - "He still remembers." (Drugging/Memory suppression/Failed treatment)

Day 28 - Give the character of your choice something happy.

Day 29 - What could've been (Graduation/Wedding/Happiness)

Day 30 - "Conquer! This is no time to die!" (The Sailor)

Day 31 - "The only things that will preserve and persevere are you and Death." (Death)

[clairedaring]

Hello!!

Hmm after watching ep 7, I’m not sure I want Kan and Thiu to end up together 😅😅 I can’t believe Kan severely injured then killed Boss so that Thiu doesn’t find out the truth about his mum. I’ve been empathetic towards Kan’s perspective about euthanasia but I feel killing Boss goes against his own view.

While I enjoyed the few sweet and domestic moments between Kan and Thiu, a relationship with a foundation of lies realistically won’t last. They’re both gonna be hurt, especially Thiu. I do hope Kan decides to tell Thiu the truth in ep 8 though. I didn’t read the novel and I’m wondering if Kan admitted the truth about Thiu’s mum to Thiu in the novel?

on a side note, I’ve been really impressed with JJ and Tor’s acting and have enjoyed their chemistry. I know this might be unlikely but I hope they pair up again in another series, preferably a rom-com so I don’t get stressed on a weekly basis 😂😂

hope you have a good day ahead! 💛

Hi nonnie (┬┬﹏┬┬)

Right!?!!??!??!1 I totally get you nonnie. I really hope you don't mind me spoiling the novel below the cut with you.

Soooo where we at in the series is very similar to where Kan and Wasan were at the end of Book 1, Kan is still hiding secrets from Wasan - Wasan finding out his mom wasn't 'killed' by the serial killer but he's ignoring that anyway to live his life blissfully with Kan -> leading to them being boyfriends but still having that huge wall of secrecy between them (both hiding things they know from each other) and Book 2 addresses that by having Kan faced legal consequences for some of his actions and there's a really dramatic arc where Wasan finds out about Kan euthanising his mom and Kan begging for his forgiveness.

The series has adjusted so much, taking some things from Book 2 but then not adapting some stuff. I really can't tell you if they'll be able to adapt that dramatic scene where Kan begs for Wasan's forgiveness because he's still hiding secrets from his boyfriend in this ep.

Your feeling of not wanting them to end up together is exactly correct because they shouldn't be together yet. How can they be happy together with all these lies between them ಥ_ಥ I think the novel did well in having them end up together but it's after many other events that the series has yet to covered and when they have undergone massive character development and mindset changes.

I too sincerely hope Kan tells Wasan everything in EP. 8. Like Mr. Doctor do you know that you have only have ONE episode left sirrrrrrr 😭

Yea I think it's unlikely that we'll meet Tor & JJ in another project soon since they're independent actors but I'm very glad they came to deliver this work because it's so rare to witness Thai series touching controversial topics, much less for it to be a primetime series with an excellent cast.

The writing for SMYM may not be perfect with obvious illogicalities or flaws here and there but the design of the characters and certain details have been almost immaculate and I must thank the strong cast for salvaging this script and keeping me absolutely hooked each week.

EDIT: because I completely forgot your OG question is about the ending of SMYM. I think One31 has had a streak with giving their OneD originals sad endings this year so I'm actually very mentally prepared for the ending of SMYM since it definitely can't be as bad as the two last ones I've seen (re: the leads dying from being executed or being shot dead) from One31. At most, Kan and Wasan will break up and you know what I'm also fine with that, serves Kan right for keep lying to man you wanna date.

[1nv1s1bl3-r41ndr0p5]

Hey! I'm Petrichor/Petri, and I use he/they pronouns :)

I've been on Tumblr for many years now (different blogs) and I decided I wanted a fresh start!!

~about me~

I am a minor- over 18s are welcome on my blog, but no NSFW accounts please!! (terfs, homophobes, racists, etc. = DNI)

I am autistic- a lot of my posts will be related to this!! I also have a lot of mental and physical health problems, so be prepared to see a lot of vents :)

I have been battling a self-harm addiction for 9 years (currently not clean :/) and disordered eating for 6 1/2.

I am transgender FtM and bi-aroace (technically, I'm nebularomantic but, but I say aro usually as it is easier for people to understand).

~what do I like?~

My favourite film is The Imitation Game (my beloved <3), and I like shows and flims such as: Ghosts, Horrible Histories, Bridgerton, Heartstopper, Sherlock, Moomin, Good Omens, Bluey, Stranger Things, Shameless, Hidden Figures, Brooklyn 99 and Coraline.

I LOVE musicals. My favourites are Hamilton, Six, ★Dear Evan Hansen★, Hairspray and Les Misèrables.

I like reading too!! My favourite books are The Seven Sisters series by Lucinda Riley

Music is my main coping mechanism, I listen to music every day and it helps me massively :)

>My favourite band is Bears in Trees and I mostly listen to indie/vent music and musicals

My hyperfixations are Dear Evan Hansen, whale sharks, plants, stationery, writing, poetry, Hamilton, anagrams + word puzzles, birds, sharks, alpacas, space and The Imitation Game.

I have an ESSA (emotional support stuffed animal) called Ebony. She is a dragon palm pal and I take her everywhere!!

☆about my neurodiversity☆

•about my mental and physical health•

my mutuals are:

@kaipler-22b

@mossy-introvert

@loulooser

@s1l4s-w0rsh1ps-t0m4t03s

@sunshinerosefromthedead

@sp4rklemuffin

tags!!

#petri rambles

#petrichor's thoughts

#petri vents

#petri-tism

#petrichor-blimey

#petrichor outside!!

#petri 🌿

current health (mental and physical) situation:

-long term depressive episode

-chronic insomnia (the same as I've had since I was 7)

-mobility flare up (especially in my knees, I can't walk for too long without large amounts of pain)

-chronic nausea (which is linked to suspected POTs, I believe)

-major anxiety and emetophobia

-unmasked!! this is a positive I think

-stress-related tics

-sui ideation/thoughts

-relapses :(

[dk-wren]

I haven't seen anyone talk about this yet, but it's something I caught/thought about while watching ep. 11. (If someone has already pointed this out and provided a more in-depth and eloquent explanation, then my apologies).

This is one of the first times Kazuki is shown fighting with a gun in the main timeline. I might be wrong, but the only other time Kazuki is shown fighting with a gun is in ep. 7's flashback to the night Yuzuko was killed.

Kazuki has been shown handling a gun in promotional art and technically used a gun in the prologue of ep. 1. (While you might disagree, I'm not really counting that moment since, at least for me, it's still unclear as to where the prologue falls into the overall BD timeline and there wasn't much of a fight leading up to Kazuki firing it). With this in mind, ep. 11 is the first time we really see him in action with a gun.

For one thing, as Rei talks about in this episode, Kazuki is the "brains" of the duo. So, when they work together, Kazuki does most of the recon, scouting, and distracting (Exp: their assigment from ep. 2 or Rei mentioning how the scout missions Kyu gave them in ep. 5 matches more with Kazuki's typical work). Since this series has more or less revolved around Kazuki and Rei as a team, we've only really seen Kazuki on missions with Rei, who is likely the better-trained or more accurate shooter/gunsman. Therefore, Kazuki takes on the more info gatherer role. Also, as an assassin, I highly doubt Kazuki is that inept at using a gun. Instead, he's just normally not in a role that requires him to use one.

I like to think Kazuki hasn't used or fought with a gun since Yuzuko's death. This could potentially be because he links her death to the necessity of fighting with a gun or after her death, Kyu did not believe Kazuki was mentally in a space to handle a gun or a mission that might require him to use one. Or perhaps, Kazuki was always more interested in and better at his scouting assignments, so once he was paired with Rei, he no longer felt the need to have to continue fighting in this way (or refusing missions that required him to use a gun).

Regardless, I think it would be so interesting that Kazuki's concern over Miri's safety is what pulls him out of this fear or refusal to fight with a gun. Someone, or rather Ogino (again), is threatening his family, so Kazuki's gonna do whatever it takes to protect them.

Given his line of work, I think Kazuki has a deep understanding of how guns can destroy and can protect. In Yuzuko's case, Kazuki witnessed the destructive and deadly side of the gun. After spending years reflecting on this, and recently giving himself the permission to change as a person, when it comes to Miri and Misaki, Kazuki now understands how he can use this weapon of death to protect the ones he loves. Yes, it is still a bringer of death, but this time Kazuki is gonna try everything in his power to not allow it to be for his family.

While Misaki did not survive, Kazuki was able to protect Miri. I don't think "inspired" is the right word, but something about Miri being in life-threatening danger is what caused Kazuki to just rush into the Unasaka's apartment, ready to fight whoever was threatening his little Miri. Kazuki fighting in a way that is unlike his normal style on assignments and being so willing to run into battle with little preparation was just one of the many things that stuck out to me from this episode. Essentially, Miri was in danger and Kazuki was gonna stop at nothing to protect her, perhaps that's why he opted for a gun this time. Kazuki was gonna use the weapon he associates and has first hand experience with, in terms of its ability to cause death, to take out any threat that would try to harm Miri.