#I'm just sick of people not Thinking abt stuff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago

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Other Misc. Rambling Thoughts on the topic:

(~ !!!!!!!!! if you're just reblogging this post for the Poll section, please reblog the original post without this addition* lol. ~)

(*not that there's anything super personal or weird about the addition, just that it's meant to be kind of casual Side Commentary, not really part of the Main Point Of The Poll, so it would feel kind of weird for it to be emphasized by being included in reblogs unless the reblogs were explicitly about the side commentary, etc..... if that makes sense.. ANYWAY!)

It's neat to read the written descriptions that people are mentioning in the tags, since it's almost like I can see or conceptualize the idea as well, but it's just.. I'm not SEEING it.

Like for example: I can imagine a vase, it's a muted mint green and slightly translucent, elaborate golden birds sprawled down the side in streaks of thin rough watery paint, the base material shimmers gently in the light, there's a small chip where it's cracked on the handle, etc, etc. .. But as I'm thinking about this I see literally nothing.

It seems like perhaps some people can visualize an object first, and THEN describe what they see. But I sort of work backwards. I am building the object in my mind, I can never see it, but it's a collection of concepts. Rather than visualizing all details as a whole at once, I am adding each detail one by one, building onto the IDEA of the thing.

The vase doesn't have a crack on the handle because I just automatically visualized a vase with a crack. It was more that I cognitively understand the concept of a vase, what they tend to be made out of, how they tend to look and feel, the properties they have. So based purely on that knowledge, I can imagine "a chip is something that a vase could have, it would look this way and behave this way" - more like... I'm constructing a bullet point Fact List about the object rather than seeing it.

So if you tell me to imagine an object, I can, in a way, imagine that object in great detail, but it's just.. I'm not SEEING those details, more just knowing it's qualities in a purely conceptual way. Sometimes in the tags when people are like "yeah I can see the skin of the apple, texture, little dots on the surface" it's like… I can imagine that too, I can know it's there, but just with no visual attached.

I guess rather than SEEING something and going ''ah. I know what this looks like because I have seen it''. I more just skip that visual step entirely and go ''I know what this looks like, I just randomly have a list of information about the concept in my mind.'' etc. Maybe similar to how sometimes in dreams, even though a house may look completely different and be in an entirely fake 'dreamlike' environment, you just somehow KNOW intuitively that it's meant to be your childhood home or something. Even when it looks nothing like it in reality. There's a built-in base knowledge of the properties or information of some things within a dreaming mind, etc.

This also makes me wonder about like.. how storytelling and myth is so important to cultures all across time. Or how this could tie also into concepts of religion.. etc. etc. If so many people really can kind of conjure these vivid images in their mind, then maybe that's part of why certain things are so meaningful to them? Like a "religious experience" being something you can actually really SEE/feel/lingering with you in your head, rather than just abstract words on a page, detached purely theoretical ideas, etc... hmmm

Plus also just for average emotional stuff too, even outside of broader cultural conceptual attachments..

Like, I don't think there's a direct 1 to 1 link (obviously not all people with mental illnesses that significantly reduce their emotional or expressive capacity also MUST have aphantasia or vice versa), but it's interesting as someone who DOES also have a much more lessened emotional range/pretty flat affect/etc. etc. to think like.. Maybe I WOULD be more emotional, in a way, if I could have these vivid experiences..?

Perhaps memories would hold deeper significance if they could really stay with me vividly. Or storytelling would evoke more of a deep emotional reaction to me if I could really picture and feel the things that are going on. If things were more TANGIBLE in my brain, rather than always merely conceptual highly abstracted ideas.

Kind of like, it's probably easier to get over the death of a pet or something, if after not seeing them for an hour you already don't remember what they looked like (beyond just a vague fact list of traits), and you have no vivid memories or mental reminders of them (beyond just factual information stores). COGNTIVIELY you can appreciate the idea of their absence, of course, you still miss them, but there's just no remaining visceral sensory ties. A very "out of sight, out of mind" sort of thing in terms of attachments, memories, emotions, etc. Maybe certain things are easier to "get over", when you're not having constant mental sensory reminders that occasionally rekindle your feelings about the event or etc.??

(like for example, maybe someone could remain angry about an argument longer if they could vividly replay it in their head over and over again. VS just like.. 'Yes I can factually recall the fact I had an argument, and I do have knowledge stored about what precisely was said, but any sort of sensory data such as sights/smells/feelings, etc. from the actual moment of the event are long gone and can never be conjured again in my mind." etc.)

Which again, I think lessened emotional permanence and image permanence in the mind are NOT inherently linked, can all be caused by different things for different people. And, since I can't visualize anything in my head, maybe I'm misunderstanding how it happens and the effect it may have on stuff like remembering things you miss or replaying arguments, etc. etc. But it's still a little interesting to think about, if they could influence each other to some degree.... :0c --

Lastly, It's also weird because I'm actually pretty good at estimating distance and spaces? I can quickly assemble furniture without an instruction manual, pretty easily have a concept of how much space a chair may take up in a room, how two mechanical parts might fit together - BUT, I am literally not actually visualizing anything. I cannot see 3D objects in my mind at ALL. It's like.. just based on the pure List Of Facts About Things Which I Have Observed.. I can intuitively go "oh this works like this/this is this size" just because.. I know it's that size. I don't have to see anything to know..?

But then on the other hand, I'm terrible at directions without a map (I guess because a 3d outdoor environment has WAY more complexity than like.. "Will this square fit into another square?"etc. lol ).

BUT, I also draw/sculpt/etc. entirely without references, and seem to do mostly okay at that..? Like.. I can't even remember the last time I actually used a reference or looked at anything whilst drawing. It's all muscle memory, and me just adjusting as I go until something "looks right" on paper, I never have a set image in my head (or external reference) before hand.. Hrmm....

AND.. I used to say that I had a photographic memory when I was younger, which I know NOW is not true (I always thought it was just an expression, not that people could literally see things in a photographic way). But what I was describing is, I do often associate information with imagery, just... without imagery....

Like "Oh, I know that I took my medicine earlier today because I have a distinct memory, a snapshot of a moment in time, of me rattling the pill bottle in my hands as I looked up at a stop sign while in the back seat of a car". When I say this, I can't ACTUALLY see/feel/hear a pill bottle, or vividly picture a stop sign, but it's more just a factual recall, of. Even though I don't see these things, I know they happened, the information of them happening (me hearing a sound and also looking at a stop sign at the same time) has been stored in my brain as a memory, a collection of linked facts. --

As for other senses, I cannot taste or feel anything in my head AT ALL.. wild that some people mention that. I mean, again, I can have a purely factual recall as if reading a textbook, knowing the information of 'X item typically has X texture, therefore I can imagine what it may be like to feel it' or 'X usually has this taste' etc. - but I can never actually experience those senses in any capacity in my mind alone. I would say audio is my strongest mental sense (maybe a 2.5 or 3 (if it were translated onto the above scale where 1 is most vivid and 5 is nothing)), then visual (4.5 at most, usually 5), and then taste and smell and such are just complete 5, absolutely nothing, I didn't even know people could experience taste or feeling just in their mind alone.. lol...

I know this is just a silly bad quality random screencap of a screencap that I found on facebook lol, BUT it's a succinct enough image to easily describe the concept in a quick/accessible way hopefully :

(and of course, feel free to elaborate in tags, etc.! (especially elaborating about other senses as well.. can you "hear" in your mind just as well as you can "see"? taste? etc.) It's an interesting topic to me, as someone who's like a 4.5 at MOST lol. I'm curious what option will be the most common :0c )

#repeat reblog #Hrmm.... this must be why you all like reading books so much lol… option 5.. so few of us…#Also I wonder if this is why I'm a more detail oriented writer. Like if I was making a story I would first have to plot out information #about the location. draw a map of the room the chararcters are in. sketch the characters. their outfits. do a lot of plotting and planning #about how the world and the setting works and what plants might be there and so on and so forth. Because I'm working #more from a factual knowledge base of like 'bullet point list of things I know about this setting/object/person/etc'#rather than actually just being able to see it in my mind. So to really conceptualize a person/place/thing - I have to build it #from the ground up conceptually. Gathering and organizing all the information about it until I have a Full Mental Concept of it - and THEN #I can work with it from there. But maybe someone who just Pictures all that in their brain from the beginning can kind of skip that step.#Like for example I literally have NO idea what any of my characters look like until I draw them. I have to actively decide what they look #like and think about all of those details and create the List Of Factual Information (black hair. green eyes. this tall. etc.) from scratch #. where the friend I talked to on the phone recently said that they literally just like... picture the character. like they just SEE them #doing stuff and know from there. And of course i have an IDEA of what I may want a characters appearnce to be or properties that would suit #them based on their Concept and Personality. but I literally do not know. And even when writing or thinking about characters doing things #I cannot visualize them no matter how hard I try. It's all theoretical factual recall for me. Also my friend said that to THEM the saying #''the characters write themselves'' was interpreted to mean.. they can literally sit down & watch the characters do things and it's as #if they are just creating a story in their mind from thin air. it writes itself. Where for ME I have always interpreted it to mean ''I have #undertaken the process of analyzing and plotting every detail of this character SO deeply that I know them SO well down to even #how they would walk or hold a pencil. and thus because I have such an intimate understanding of every intricacy of their personality. It's #extremely easy to just Put Them Into A Situation and assume exactly how they'd react/ exactly what they'd say because based #on what has factually been determined about them and their personality/worldview/etc. it's just.. literally automatic. The same way that #if you knew a friend's preferences extremely well you could probably easily predict how they'd respond to a birthday gift'' etc.#hmm.. ANYWAY... Which my friend may be an extreme example. I feel like it'd be obvious even for writers without aphantasia to STILL sit #down and plot out details & intimately understand their characters/setting/etc. But the idea that for ANYONE it's like ''yeah I dont have t #think much about designing the layout of a room/place/etc. I just kind of SEE it in my mind and know automatically''.... wild... lol #It makes it seem like I'm always having to do like 500 tons of extra work that other people can just skip .. oughh #''well after writing them for a YEAR and fully conceptualizing their personality and going through 15 sketch drafts. i have FINALLY #decided on an appearance for my character'' ... ''erm.. i have been seeing my character since day 1.. what do you mean?'' ... lol #ANYWAY.. and thank you to those who have sent in asks abt your experiences.. very inchresting.. sorry not posting/responding yet since im #still a bit sick feeling and energy is very scattered/low social ability/etc... even this post i typed over the course of days lol..

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the-lemonaut · 2 years ago

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Characters co-owned w @_magic.stardust_ on IG 😌✨ (a couple more comics abt this on my account already)

I'm not a very positive person, i have a LOT of doomer tendencies. I feel everything like it's cranked up to the max, and as you can imagine it doesn't feel great. Every day throws more atrocious things in my face, and i can't ignore it 🥲

I see other people feeling the same way. We dissociate and numb ourselves by watching, playing, buying stuff. Hateful movements are gaining traction and climate change has its foot in the door

And it's all happening either way, to some degree. I feel like shit, and i'm sick of that. I might as well have a little bit of hope, otherwise i'll go bonkers 😭 Do we continue doomering our way through life or ignoring things altogether, or do we choose to hope a little?

That's why i'm looking into Solarpunk and am thinking of taking any readers (and myself) on a little journey through a better world, and how it might work, through a series of mini-comics I'm posting here. I don't have all the answers (no one person ever does), and i don't hold any pretenses that this kind of world is going to be our future. But i often hear "You love critiquing the status quo, but what do you propose instead?" I'd like to find out too. Here's to something we can hope for, no matter how slim the chances are! Because as I said, i might just lose my mind otherwise ☠️

P.S for new peeps: this is an AU with me and my friend's OCs, so all characters are genderless and go by they/them. It's not identical to our world in that regard, but other than this fact we try to keep it more or less realistic 🤙

I spent a thousand krillion hours on this and the other Solarpunk comics, consider throwing 2$ at me on Buy Me A Coffee to raise my spirits :] I'm not doing well mentally these days, but people's appreciation helps a lot. Thank you very much!

#star sailors #solarpunk #solarpunk art #star sailors SPAU #image described #alt text #my art

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lamnwar · 11 months ago

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Hey me again, lmao

Could you do Kiyoshi + Gom as husbands, If so thank youuu xxxx

Hi there, love! 💕 love love love this request!! I spend all my time daydreaming abt being married to these boys LMAO it's embarassing 😭 alsooo ik I took long before getting to your request but I wanted to finish all the big os requests first before working on hcs bc it's more heafty so sorry for my shitty habit of taking too long for simple stuff :((

HAPPILY EVER AFTER // KNB Headcanons

Context: what I imagine married life to be with these characters. 🥰

Pairing: GOM + Kiyoshi x gn! Reader (gender not specified)

Warnings: mainly fluff and crack, can get a bit suggestive in Aomine's (of course it's always him 😭) so mdni!

AKASHI

Rich, handsome and a gentleman!!! Literally the Holy Grail of husbands

The kind to spoil his pretty spouse out of love

Takes you out on a date at some fancy restaurant at least once a week

He's also very independent!! Now, I think he's the kind to hire people to help around the house but that doesn't stop him from doing chores

He'll always help you doing stuff for the house if you need

He has amazing taste!! Take him furniture shopping and you'll end up with on of those houses you see in AD

Brings up the subject of you dropping your work so you can stay home while he's the breadwinner

He's a bit traditional in that sense because he really doesn't want you to work if it's unecessary, you know?

I mean he's crazy rich so does that even make sense to make you work?? (Unless you absolutely want to)

Wakes you up every morning with a kiss!

He always had the proudest smile when he introduces you to people as his spouse <3

MIDORIMA

TREATS YOU LIKE A ROYAL OMG

This man takes marriage very seriously, listen

He most likely did a deep analysis of your birthchart before deciding that you are the right one for him

Naturally, as your husband, he gotta get you your lucky item of the day everyday

You don't even believe in that stuff but it's his love language, I guess

Not much one to go on dates unless you want to, then he'll be up for it

He's more one to enjoy time with you at home

Something like having a nice diner and cuddling while you read

The kind to love going grocery shopping with you

Every once in a while, he'll buy a fancy bottle of wine just to share it with you

A very supportive husband!! Every project you have in mind, he's already done the research to find the most efficient way for you to accomplish your plans

Not a PDA guy but he'll happily hold your hand when you're at gatherings together

May not be very vocal about his love for you but you better believe that he talks proudly of his spouse to every one he knows

KISE

He is OBSESSED with you

Man never left the honeymoon phase, he's so crazy about you

Takes you to his fancy modelling events and shows you off to every one he meets

He also buys you lots of clothes and acessories

Dare you say something is cute, he's already inside the shop buying it for you

Tries his best as chores but it's not really his thing

Will help as much as he can, though!

Breakfast in bed kind of guy hihi

And it happens a lot because let's be real, that man isn't the kind to let you sleep at night

Like I said earlier, he's never left the honeymoon phase so... yeah

Wants to be the kind of husband that gives you his credit card and tell you to do what you want with it but you have to decline

It's ok though, he'll fine plenty of other ways to spoil you

You have that cute habit every week of taking baths together

The kind to miss a day of work to take care of you when you're sick!

AOMINE

Daiki never thought he'd ever get married, but then he met you

Not the best at being a husband but he really tries!

Like he makes an effort of not being too lazy and messy

Leaves the chores to you mainly, but will give a hand

Like if you're cleaning around and need to put stuff on the top shelf, he'll do it for you

Not the best cook so he lets you make food while he does the dishes

I'm trying to delay the obvious but that man never stops being horny for you

Literally sits and daydream of fucking you on every surface of your home

Gets so riled up at the sight of that ring on your finger, he can't believe your all his

The kind to follow you everywhere you go, even if it's for some stupid errand

Takes you out to the beach or for a picnic as soon as the sun is shining outside

Buys you clothes he thinks you'd look good in and surprisingly, he's got amazing taste

Loves when you refer to him as "husband" in conversation!!

MURASAKIBARA

So casual about being married, most likely because to him that doesn't change a thing about the way he feels about you

Likes that now he gets to have you with him all the time

Cooks for you! Buys you snacks! Takes you out on restaurant dates!

Sharing is caring so he only ever shares his snack with you

I can see him being into matching outfits (if you can find any that fits both him and you)

A bit lazy so he doesn't help around that much unless you tell him to

And even that, he'd do some chores before getting distracted

But listen, it's ok though because he makes up for it in over ways

He's very caring, only because you're his spouse

Cuddles in bed, at all time! He just feels clingy sometimes

He smiles softly when he plays with your hand and sees the ring on your finger

He likes to sit you on his lap often

Basically being a husband doesn't differ much from how he was as a boyfriend

Very casual about calling you his spouse all the time, even in front of others

KIYOSHI

Kiyoshi Teppei was born to be a husband!!

Because he grew up with his grandparents, he's got the habit of taking care of a household and the people living in it

So he naturally took in most of the chores and he's good at it!

Doesn't want you to get tired either so he'll do most things

Pays attention to all the little things so you're always comfortable

He also likes going for a run/the gym with you and he's so encouraging!

Has the stupidiest smile on his face everytime he looks at you

He holds his grandparents as a reference so he really hopes you'll both grow old together, still madly in love

Don't get that man started on building a family, he just gets too excited at the idea of being a parent!

He'd be a great one too, but the final decision is up to you. Either way, he's just happy being with you.

I don't know what else to say because he's just made to be a husband, yk?

Yeah, probably the best person to marry <3 (I'm very biased)

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hajihiko · 4 months ago

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I know you don't like to talk abt Nagito much (valid btw) but I noticed something abt how you draw him that I cannot stop myself from asking about.

So this could def be nothing but I was wondering how you go about his prosthetic? I noticed you don't really draw it much and was wondering if that was on purpose, if you had a reason for it, etc. You also draw his arm as cut off a lot higher than I see most other people draw it.

Idk, I like thinking about his prosthetic, how it works, how often he uses it, etc. and you seem to think about it much differently than most others. I just wanted to know if you had any thoughts about it or if you go based on vibes or smth.

well I do always go nased on vibes and memory which are both fallible. But also more

Just for funsies i tallied

Arm:

Missing 4

Not visible 11

Accidentally there 3

On purpose there 5

Prosthetic 1.5

Junko 3

Sometimes i forget (bc i don't draw him often) and give him his old arm, sometimes it's an ambiguous timeline. The reason is pretty simply that i really don't like drawing mechanical things, but I'm sure he would have a sick mechanical arm courtesy of Kaz.

The reason it's up high is because i imagine the, uh, 'Junko rot' had spread and it was safer to not leave any dead tissue behind. If untreated, in a bad end, which is p much all my horror stuff, it eats its way to dangerous places; Nagitos heart, Fuyuhikos brain, and Mikans general reproductive system and suchly related things. Head, heart, body.

#not an art #I overthink mechanical body parts. I cant just draw lines on it #I start thinking about where the plates meet and which goes ubder which and where the seams would be

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floralscented · 23 days ago

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i seriously did not want to do this but if i'm gonna be talked abt behind the scenes, and if ppl i follow are going to start turning on me because of one actual psychopath that has not left me alone for 3 weeks, i'm gonna say my piece because it is not fair to know that i am being painted in a bad light, when i have been a victim, and my friends have been dragged into this because every time, it is made public.

all of this has happened in a span of twenty one days. here's my proof.

this is a server that one of my close friends and most adored people (who, again, like anyone else mentioned in this, should not have been dragged into this fucking tirade) created for spn fans on discord to cultivate a fun little community and to make friends. she acquired the link, i don't know who invited her or if somehow she just found the link if it was posted and joined herself, but she showed up.

four days into her being there, i tell the server, i'm making a mr. & mrs. smith inspired jackles bot. i'd more say 3, because i posted it at midnight that day. eleven hours later, she says 'i wanna make a mr. & mrs. smith dean bot.' so my whole idea. and i am not a confrontational person by nature, so i was trying to lightly discourage without straight up saying no, because i did not know this girl. it'd been a little over 3 days.

i have the person i was replying to blurred because i'm actually sick of people getting dragged into this that did not have any reason to be put in between her shit with me, whatever the hell that may be.

here is me lightly trying to deny it but not outright saying no, and maybe that's on me, but who in their right mind sees someone else's idea and eleven hours later just blatantly copies it?

and she did copy it. word for word. this is my intro message on the left, and this is hers on the right. it's literally word for word, practically, with the lines lining up and everything.

so i'm angry. i don't care abt follower account but now i'm going to look like the thief because at this point, i'm not anywhere near big. like 300 followers. which again, don't care about, but sometime between the span of this above and what's coming, she'd been posting abt a milestone very close to 1k. that is a clear difference, and an abuse of the writing channel, that is supposed to have been a safe place for us to share our ideas.

i don't say anything about this, though. my breaking point is when she discovers my bonnie & clyde au and says she wants to make a bot based on it. which maybe i would have said yes to someone else, but she'd stolen my idea already before, word for word, and i wasn't in the mood. so i politely told her no, and that i was planning on making bots out of all of my aus. and she goes something like, "oh, that's fine, i just really liked the idea is all." i have deleted our dms on discord because i didn't want her reaching out to me again, which does come up!

anyways, i think it's cool. i'm thinking she's not going to take anything else, because i denied her one thing, so maybe this was just a one-off.

she posts this into the writing server, like she's showing off that she made the bot anyways / had made it already in the short span of time it took me to reply to her, and was trying to get hype for it??? or something?? or rub it in my face that she made it anyways? i don't know her motives. for anything that happens in this.

not to mention, she made a mr. & mrs. smith dean pt two in this time, for some reason. again, not her idea.

but going back to the above screenshot, that's her chatting with bonnie & clyde!dean. please look here at a screenshot of my fic, literally making it clear that whatever the intro she used for this, it was identical, because the interaction here is identical to my writing.

the day before this, december 1st, she was also asking me to tell her abt the au, but i'm not going to downright say that it was to stake out stuff to steal, but looking back, it seems like it.

so by this point, i'm angry! really angry! because every idea i mention in that chat, gets stolen by her. so i make this post. kind of infamous when it comes to future things.

immediately, she knows it's about her, because she's messaging me everywhere. i. do. not. engage. behind the scenes, i'm talking to people in the server abt it, because i literally am being stolen from and expected to take it! so she gets kicked.

this causes her to message me even more. this causes her to make an entire post ( now deleted by ppl in the server's request, because we thought once 'resolved', it would be resolved ) tagging every single person in the server. not just me, not just the people who came forward or the server's owner, but everyone who has no idea what's going on. trying to pitch her case.

her case being, by the way, that the reason she copied me was because of photographic memory. i feel like i have a screenshot of this but can't find it, and also don't want to keep using all my limited picture spaces. but if i find it and you want to see it, i will show it.

she gets let back into the server on a warning. it's like a 3 strike system, i imagine, which this is where things get psychotic! like genuinely!

the very day that i tell her no to the bonnie & clyde thing, i get this in my inbox.

on god, never before have i been told this ever. and i'm supposed to believe that it's not a coincidence, when the only person i've 'wronged' on tumblr so far is her, and just for calling her out on her shit? i've literally been on tumblr for maybe 2 months maximum at this point. like i only know a handful of people, and most are in this server.

so i move on. whatever. one of my friends from the server makes a post ( that i rb-ed, but i'm not gonna link it because again, i'm keeping them out of this if i can, but it's also on my page still ) in my defense, because genuinely, it is not that fucking serious to tell a fanfic writer to kill themselves.

after she posts it, she gets an anon telling her to track them. and then one telling her to kill herself. again, i'm not posting who's doing this, but she responded to it, and it's on her account if you need to see more proof.

so you might be thinking, how do you know this is her? it's a lot of circumstantial evidence and gut feelings. and yes, i did doubt it at the time that maybe it wasn't, and i was just paranoid, but literally sometime last week, she not only:

messaged me 4 times privately on discord to reply to a question i already answered (being like do you think i'm a bad person? or something like that. but i answered it! and she added something on the end that i didn't see because i was busy and in a different timezone.)

tagged me twice in the server to try and get my attention for this question.

private messaged me here on tumblr.

sent an ask, which i do still have & a screenshot in case it gets deleted btw, about it.

MADE. A THROWAWAY ACCOUNT. BAITING ME INTO REPLYING TO IT. it was a comment abt a fic, so i said thank you, and within 3 fucking minutes max, she sent me ANOTHER message on discord saying "please stop ignoring me." THE ACCOUNT NOW, IS GONE. SO THAT'S HOW I KNOW IT'S HER. you will see later, too, that this is fitting for her character.

i know that screenshot is not much to go off of, but that account did not follow me, did not even like or interact with that fic. i remember taking that screenshot because i was like, there's no way this is her, like actually no way, because the first message to get me to say anything was just like a compliment. and the moment i replied, she messages me, and after i message back, i get the above response. i hope this makes sense.

this is her strike 2, by the way, because i was getting harassed and i wasn't going to sit there and be like yeah this is fine that this is happening to me. i am six hours, maybe more, behind her timewise. as you can see in the screenshot, it was 1:27 am for me.

so all of this happens, and she's getting increasingly more passive aggressive. she keeps bringing up CONSTANTLY that none of us interact with her things anymore, which is crazy to me, because she hardly interacted with ours but expected things back for her. not to mention, of course i wasn't going to interact with someone the same after that someone stole my shit.

all of this leads to december 17th, which yes, was yesterday. which i'm assuming is her big crashout because it's the only reason i can think of anything else that it could be??? but me and a lot of the other server members get anons like this. which is why, like i said earlier, i am convinced the kys is her. this one is the one i received.

and these are a couple that my friends did.

none of us reply, and she's spamming in the chat asking if we got anything, and we all deny it, because we know it's her. like, who else comes into other people's asks to talk shit on someone else? it makes no sense. especially people that the anon wouldn't have known? that she was friends with? i wasn't even in her little intro tagged post, like a lot of the server was before now, so it's literally a dead giveaway that this is her.

when she gets to me, though, after being told i think twice that no, none of us received anything, tumblr must have eaten it, her message changes. and she's like "i just got a second ask telling me that you definitely got one." and when i asked to see the screenshot of the ask that name drops me, she says she deleted it. like how convenient, right?

so this is where things get absolutely mental. more so than they are.

the dani era. shortlived but absolutely insane. suddenly she's leaving her account, as you probably saw from one of her posts that's now deleted, but i might have a screenshot.

you can't really see it but she changed her server name to dani too, and you might have seen her account before literally this afternoon, was daniisms. so again, she is kicked, because suddenly handing off your account to a stranger is weird and violates the rules. i am not in charge of the kicking, by the way, if for some reason you think i am. i literally am just a person in the server who for some reason was targetted? idk.

i don't want to air out her shit but this is the reasoning she provided for why she was quitting and 'dani' was taking over. sorry it's so small i was on my laptop n so it's just. like that.

in a later message, she brings up how specifically she is depressed... because of lack of engagement from us. literally. and i get that that's upsetting, but she just handed over her whole account allegedly? because of it? that's insane to me.

so after she's kicked, she starts messaging some of us on discord, i got an ask.

this, also, is still in my drafts, because i was going to privately be like arty this is actually clinical please seek help, but it wouldn't let me post it privately so i didn't! because i never wanted! any of this! public! from the very beginning!

also you can see there, the username change. so a lot of us block her. i didn't because i wanted to see if being kicked and no longer apart of the server would make her give it up, which yeah, i should have, but i give a lot of benefit of the doubt if you can't tell, when all it does is bite me in the ass.

because a lot of people got blocked, she made an account called bella-oftheball, and only followed two people from the server, commented on one of my random fics, and on the account right now, her only like is another person from the server's. not to mention, the header on the account is literally exactly her edit style. again. blocked.

so this morning. all of us are getting messages from arty again, suddenly back on her account, and claiming that all of this is a hacker. that she hasn't even been here for weeks. so this is the first time she's seeing any of this allegedly and she's confused, doesn't understand why she's gone from the server, her discord account's deleted...

still here in my friends list. lol. and she's in my asks, as you can see where i answer it. so you can see her exact defense and then her in the comments.

now i just want you to tell me why a hacker would:

post all of her drafts

target a spn tumblr writing acct??? like?

and none of her sideblogs ?

make up ANOTHER persona aka the friend named dani.

go through the effort of liking some of our things when she did, and interacting with all of us in the server???

because hackers usually idk. delete the entire accounts. or post awful things on someone else's accts. they wouldn't just run it like their own ??????

so yeah. she's back on tumblr btw, as artyandink, as arty. i'm posting this because her intro message has changed to no longer have any of the server ( not me, never me, and i wonder why! ) but people that i know she's telling all of this too and painting not only me as a bad guy, but also my friends who literally only are involved because they were defending me. dragged into this shit for daring to believe me.

i am making this both in my defense and as a warning. please be careful around this person! she switches identities on a dime to fit her narrative, will harass you if you don't answer fast enough, will harass you if you say anything she doesn't like, and will literally torment your entire friend group if she deems fit, as a form of sick pleasure or something. again, i don't know her motive, just that i've been going through this behind the scenes for 3 fucking weeks, all for it to lead up to this, and to have me being pinned by her to people that do not know a thing about this because it was NEVER MEANT. TO BE PUBLIC. OR THIS INSANE.

<3 please stay safe ily guys.

#artyandink #call out post #weirdo alert !!! 🚨#pls seriously look out guys #this has been very scary to try n deal with #and i honestly wouldnt wish it on anyone

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brofightiscancelled · 5 months ago

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(taking a really long drag off a cigarette) i know the joke is that osomatsu at 18 is the exact same as osomatsu current but didnt he seem angrier to you. just in general. i cannot imagine how teenage angst would hit you if you were also a sextuplet

like he was probably as carefree and stupid as usual with literally everyone else to be fair. but w his brothers it's like ough. i wonder if the "getting sick of the sextuplet schtick" hit him the hardest in HS. he's the only one who isnt visibly annoyed in the sleeping scene but he's also the one saying "why are there six of us?"

i thibk osomatsu has genuine qualms w being a sextuplet. we see him complain abt it to chibita in episode 2. i dont think they were totally unfounded or made up on the spot, that's stuff he was holding deep in his core

and i think esp in an environment like high school, and w being such an egotistical brat, oso wouldve started resenting not having his own identity just like the others. i imagine he wouldve channeled his clingy brattiness into being a nuisance to all of his peers. it's just that now, in adulthood, he literally doesnt have anyone else in his life, so his brattiness has fallen back onto his brothers.

ironic to how he is now, i think the "why are you asking me? that's your problem" response to totty comes from resenting the sextuplet status quo they'd established as kids of them expecting him to know what to do and expecting to follow his lead and having eldest brother expectations of him forever and ever. why do you assume we're going to be together forever? don't you know i'm going to make it out on my own in the real world?

it's interesting it was between totty and oso cuz it seemed like hs totty wanted things to stay the way they were the most. regressing and acting even more kid like. so to me oso saying that to totty specifically is a like "why are you expecting things to stay the way they were forever?" kind of thing

i feel like (inhaling more smoke) it's kind of like the fight at their grad ceremony kind of unlocked those revelations for them. we've just had the worst fight of our lives but at the end of the day we all have to take the same route home to all sleep in the same futon. we're going to be brothers no matter what. for better or for worse we're shackled sextuplets forever and ever.

Everything just kinda clicks because even though he hates it, they're stuck together. And he doesn't have any idea on what he's gonna do, he knows Totty doesn't know what to do, and it's probably easy for him to guess that the rest of them don't know what to do either. They're stuck together and none of them have a plan for the future besides that. i think oso was coasting by on this idea that "everything would work out somehow" (very oso-like) and this is the wakeup call that no, if left unattended, this is how your problems will fester

i also really often think about 18oso's reaction to finding out they're neets in the future. yes this is funny yes this is deeply sad but i also remember being really taken aback by it when i first saw it

like obviously after you think about it for 1.5 seconds like, yes, obviously oso didn't realize at age 18 that he was going to be a jobless bum well into his 20s. being a jobless bum wasn't what he had envisioned for his life. but juxtaposed with how carefree current osomatsu is with his life it really is funny to realize like oh, yeah, there was a point in time, most of their life really, where they thought they'd be something when they were adults

i think oso had always wanted his own identity like any other teen, but now that the only people left in his life as an adult are his brothers he's just clinging to his identity as niichan. but maybe this is the smoke inhalation talking

i think if oso had any other friends than his twins he would not be this annoying. but he doesn't

#txt #analysis #1 #sure this can go in my oso tag. sure #anyways this revelation that any of these men could be fixed by just having normal friends their age who didnt #kno wthem at age 10 #is why i wrote my ichi/nyaa fanfic. i desperately need these boys to get normal friends

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spacelazarwolf · 1 year ago

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I've seen people say that because you don't talk enough about the genocide in palestine and instead talk about the antisemitism in leftist pro-palestine spaces (even though you have talked about palestine before and don't support israel) that somehow makes you a zionist. It's like ??? That's not how that works. Honestly I'm sick of this performative activism where you must disavow anyone Jewish who dares to talk about antisemitism during this time. Then these people turn around and say that they don't hate Jews they just hate Israel

yeah it’s exhausting. i’ve got complicated feelings abt calling it a genocide — mostly bc of the way non palestinian gentiles are just parroting words without actually understanding why people are calling it a genocide, and also using it as an excuse for gratuitous holocaust inversion — but at the end of the day i think arguing a semantic issue isn’t going to help gazans who are dying right now. i don’t think it matters if we say it’s genocide or if we say it’s a precursor to genocide or if we say it’s a catastrophic loss of human life, it’s all just words. what matters right now is not if one single random disabled jew thousands of miles away uses the right word. what matters right now is that people are dying and that needs to stop. and apparently saying that means i’m an evil genocide denier who’s basically a nazi.

and like. it doesn’t matter how many times i explain my position in excruciating detail. it doesn’t matter how much nuance i give and how many personal feelings and insecurities i share, bc it has never been abt if i’m actually a zionist. they don’t care. in fact, it’s better for them if i don’t openly identify as a zionist, because that strengthens their use of zionist as a dogwhistle. if they only targeted jews who openly identified as zionists, the dogwhistle wouldn’t work.

and for the antisemitism stuff, i’m very unsurprised that’s why they’re targeting me. ppl have made it clear that they not only don’t care abt antisemitism but that antisemitism is necessary for their “activism” so they see me telling them not to be antisemitic as me telling them not to advocate for palestinians, and at this point i can’t help it if they’re idiots.

zionism and antisemitism aren’t a chicken and the egg situation. zionism is a direct response to antisemitism in the diaspora, and by actively participating in making it worse and mocking jews for being afraid of the antisemitism we’re facing, you’re doing political zionists’ work for them. i want to talk about this, about the rhetoric i’ve seen used in some jewish spaces and how antisemitism in antizionist movements just bolsters it, and what they can do to instead connect with these jewish institutions and leaders to address the very real concerns jews have and show them that israel is not the solution. but people don’t want to hear what they can do better. they want to hear that “zionists” and “zionist institutions” are all evil groups plotting world domination and weaponizing the holocaust. i might have more success doing this work in irl spaces but i’ve very much given up on doing it here.

#ask avishai #ip

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lynn-tged-posting · 23 days ago

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tged webtoon ep 171 spoilers and thoughts but i'm mostly just going "YAY I LIKED THIS MOMENT" and more below the cut

DEMON KING LLOYD HELLO. HELLO?? WHAT. WHY?? BUT WOW. HOLY SHIT. I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS

I LOVE WHEN CHARACTERS GAIN WINGS AND HORNS AND . GHGHHGHGHHG AAAHHH ITS MY FAVORITE THING if you didn't already know dragon lloyd was like one of my favorite all-time panels so this is VERY AWESOME FOR ME YAYYY YAAAAYYY HAHAHA

LIKE SERIOUSLY LOOK HE GOT FANGS N SHIT AND. OH MY GODD THE SMOKE SLIPPING PAST HIS LIPS IM SO??? THAT'S SO COOL. I LOVE WHEN THEY DO THAT WITH SMOKE AND MONSTROUS FORMS OF CHARACTERS

genuinely i need to draw this asap. pacing issues aside i am obsessed with how sick this is. i love this a LOT

ok ok back to the top bc theres some stuff i wanna touch on from before demon king lloyd got revealed! because...

"master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us".

EXCUSE ME WHAT

YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT OFF SCREEN, LLOYD TOOK TIME OUT OF HIS BUSY ASS DAY. TO TEACH THE KIDS HOW TO PLAY SOCCER. AND THEY HAVE PLAYED ENOUGH TO BE FAMILIAR ENOUGH TO PLAY ON THEIR OWN. WHICH MEANS THAT LLOYD . PLAYED SOCCER WITH THEM . AND WE FIND THIS OUT. NOW?? I. GGHH. THATS SO. CUTE. IM GOING TO BITE HIM. THE FUCKER. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

the fact that they go up to ask him im going to EXPLODE?!?!?

he looks so nonchalant abt it here im cryinf

AND LOOK AT THEM GO THIS IS SO SO SWEET IM VERY GLAD LYRA GOT TO PLAY WITH THEM I LIKE THIS A LOT

this scene, and the beginning scene where the adults were just so casual with her and treating her as a living person with feelings and someone that they can talk to was so so heartwarming i oooghhh my heart

AND THEN THERE HE IS. SMILING IN THE BACK. YOU ASS.

I SEE YOU BEING KIND AND EMPATHETIC AND SELFLESS LLOYD. YOU LOST THE NONCHALANT WAR. YOU CAN'T ESCAPE

christ. i fucking HATE him /j /aff

it is also VERY silly that they're so casual abt. destruction like that HELPPP they got it from someone sob sob, though i imagine since most of the estate consists of people who have done construction it probably isnt that big of a deal when things get destroyed every now n then

and lyra looks so damn happy,,, god im so glad she had a good experience, she really needed one :')

also i completely LOST it when the kid got mad at lyra for not responding with a yes or no HELPPP JESUS CHRIST

again they,,, got it from someone HAHA though honestly i think it tracks. kids can be straightforwardly brutal in their language, especially when they don't really have biases or cares for who they are speaking to. as crazy as this instance looks (LMFAO) i think this fits well with the context of the straightforwardness of children and considering the person who they look up to at the estate. i think it was good for lyra to meet a human child her age who can speak straightforwardly and not skirt past things, if that makes sense? i hope it does!

AND THE DEMON KING TRANSFORMATION i already talked abt it above but i wanna point out this blue system box here

a power outside of the system?!?? what does this mean for the protagonist of the new prequel bk_moon is writing?? is the weather forecasting included in this???

my first assumption right now is that the demon king power is just an in-world power system while everything else (ie the weather forecasting) is external, blue-textbox system. maybe? so lloyd got the demon king power which comes with skills separate from the ones that the system can provide? that would explain why there's no indication of lloyd trying to use the weather forecasting, he probably can't use it,,,? except i dont know why artanis can use it in that case. most likely i am overthinking it LMFAO

semi-related, i am a little confused as to why artanis did this? i guess she really, really trusted him w this power? or maybe her weather forecasting noted that this would be something good to do i have no idea,,, it Does feel a bit sudden i won't lie, i'm not sure how earned this is

also javier and everyone else not reacting that much to the demon king status. SENT ME HAHA "... nothing's changed." LOL

deadpan humor never fails to make me giggle ily javier

also loved the moment where the two of them were bein serious for a sec,,, they've got a job to do they've got people to protect. lloyd will stop fate and javier will be right besides him...

i think showing them at emily's wedding really cements how much they really, REALLY need to fight fate now. the novel events happening is very very bad, but it feels like now that so many people, emily especially, have found THIS much happiness in their lives,,, failing to stop fate will hit even harder. i really like the analogy of a taut bow that the dragon king used when he first described it, bc it's really REALLY showing how much the repercussions will hit if they fail. im praying they succeed,,, please,,, i need a happy ending or i will curl up and turn into an actual shrimp irl.

and now the demons have to build the pantara railroad,,, artanis's expression omfg

she really didn't,,, know,,, she trusted him that much,,,, girl,,,

but it's ok. it'll be a net positive trust! that's how lloyd does things!!! and then soon we'll get the happy ending where we can get the eye of summer and beat up fate and then silly fun times YAYY <- probably copium

some other thoughts of note that i had with a dear mutual (hi sprout :3) about this ep:

we were talking about how the plot seems to be paced right now, and honestly i'm of the opinion that while yes its Technically moving, the way they're ending each ep in this current arc makes it feel like it's going both very slow and very fast, that is to say it feels like it's not moving at all

bc they're like "okay NOW we're gonna do the build project" and it's been like that for several episodes now. pieces are moving but we're going past the point of it all too fast (especially the whole demon king thing. mentioned this before but while cool, doesn't feel as earned simply bc we're both tackling each point and yet blowing past all the points, so it's a lot less satisfying than it should be (despite how awesome it is,,, oh lloyd you give me so much internal conflict </3))

it does make me a lil worried that they're gonna timeskip the hell out of the pantara railroad build. however this episode, although it still has a weird pacing/movement issue, does feel a little bit better than the last two imo, so i have hope that it'll turn out okay, that it'll start heading up! i'm actually really excited to see where they go with this and i'm sure that even if the pacing is still goofy i'll have some kind of fun with it (seriously the panels this ep were wonderful HAHA)

anyway that's all for this week! extremely excited for the next ep,,, ill see yall then,,, lets go pantara railroad arc!!!

#tged #the greatest estate developer #lynn misc #tged spoilers #the greatest estate designer #lloyd frontera #tged lloyd #i read this episode in the middle of my finals actually LMFAOOOOO #okay well not like during an exam or anything dont worry guys #but like definitely when i should have been working and studying. so.#it probably helped me i think demon king lloyd showing up gave me the dopamine i needed to actually get shit done and finish through friday #or was it serotonin? what's the happy chemical? i don't know i'm an engineer not a med student #on that note though I DID WELL ON MY FINALS! EVERYONE CHEER!#i'd like to thank lloyd frontera for being with me in my time of extremely extremely severe (that's two extremely's) “losing it” moments #it all ended up worth it. i passed a comp sci class with an A for the first time in several years #safe to say i'm very happy!#more posts to come now that i'm on break! i have SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THAT DAMN PREQUEL NOVEL. and also about alicia. very excited!#i'll see y'all then okay i'll post this shit now #(maybe i need to cool it on the “posting my secondary thoughts to tags” thing) (idek if anyone reads this) (OK POST)

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solargeist · 7 months ago

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Does Grian reflect some of the manerisms Aether treated him with when he was with the Watchers onto baby Xelqua? I think you said before that he didn't really have parents so him only kinda knowing how to parent because of being treated like a child back with the Watchers is really sad and really cute

Also since after season eight Xelqua can come and go as he pleases does that mean that Aether and Flora can to? Or at least see what's going on there with Watcher magic and stuff?

oh yes ! i've thought abt that before !! but wasn't sure how to draw it, but yes ! Grian does accidentally mimic Aether, even with things he didn't like.

Like, the Watchers used to coo over how cute he is, showing off his wings or commenting on his height, making him feel small and embarrassed--but they did this out of genuine adoration. Grian sorta does mimic this with Xelqua, he's so small its ridiculous, isn't it ? But look at his ears, they're so big ! Grian does this bc he does think its cute. (xelqua likes the attention at least haha)

Tho with some things, Grian remembers and purposely does the opposite, even tho its not exactly the best choice either. Like with food, he only got food if the Watchers allowed it/he asked, but Xelqua can pick and eat whatever he wants, whenever, and yes this would be good--but sometimes kids make bad choices and eat a lot of candy and get sick to their stomach, like, no you can't have the entire bag, lets put a few in a bowl, yknow ? He has to learn this, hard way ! Xelqua throws up on his rug.

Grian used to get upset abt people messing with his food cabinets, bc he has a food hoarding issue due to food insecurity, but hes gotten more steady abt it.

But with a lot of parenting things, Grians sorta learned along his entire life, he's already 30 by time Xelquas around, and he raised Pearl--even if they were kids at the same time--it sorta helps now.

Grians also learning to relax and take things slower, not stress and overwork himself, thats something he also struggled with the Watchers, and he has to bite his tongue and swallow his disdain when Xelqua is being lazy (being a kid, rly) bc he's aware enough to know thats just the Watchers in his head, not his actual feelings.

Theres probably other moments, like i think when Xelqua hugs Grian's leg or leans against him, Grian ruffles his hair in a specific way he remembers Aether doing to him. But i can't think too much rn i'm sleepy !!

And !!! Thats an interesting thought, Xelqua..... in his natural form... is on his own level, he can do what he wants, rly. The Watchers........ Don't necessarily have a reason to go in and out of Hermitcraft, but they're aware of it now post s8. Since Watchers are based off viewers, i think they Watch the Hermits, but don't interact or control anything, its a sturdy world. I haven't rly thought abt this, i've had a few random ideas, like grian writing letters, but i dont know anything for sure. The AU around this point becomes a badly drawn horse i think ADGKAJK

#ask #grians not allowed back into the watchers domaine thats for sure though #most watchers do not like him. flora doesn't like him. but since he and aether have a neutral/positive relationship. others leave him alone

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