#I'm getting really lazy help me
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Happy Valentine's day 💌
I know I'm late, my bad guys
#art#humanization#personified#gjinka#valentines day#poppy playtime#poppy playtime chapter 3#poppy playtime bobby bearhug#bobby bearhug#ppt#ppt 3#smiling critters#poppy playtime fanart#poppy playtime art#i'm getting really lazy help me#Mileniyum's art
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Excited to meet this guy on Friday
#messmer the impaler#elden ring#art#digital art#illustration#so whaddya know I DO know how to render#who would've thunk#I want to get used to blobbing down multiple colors as a base instead of being lazy with flats cuz it just looks so boring to me now#hopefully this is a start#it was really helpful to have the helmet as a ref though...should keep in mind when i'm coloring stuff like clothes
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soooo I need to sell some Louis stuff... I have listed elsewhere but priority to the tumblerinas (and tumblrinos), if one of yall wants to buy the 3 6 9 FITF cassette bundle or red and black splatter vinyl FITF (all sealed), talk to me about it
#cassettes- edition 3 is clear#edition 6 is red#9 is black#my meds mean my monthly expenses are greater than my income now so that's fun... you'd be helping me out fr#all that and I'm still getting worse😭simply the expense of not getting even more worse-er#I REALLY can't afford the things that might actually get me better���but ANYWAY NM THAT#point is uhhh look at that face those could be yours#who thinks the middle one should have been the main cover?#forgive the shit photography lol it was very lazy wasn't it#its funny I just saw the other post selling stuff I've had this in drafts since yesterday#we're all struggling huh
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a lot of clipping to fix, but hey I got it moving at least! I'll get the Telvanni robe properly physic'd if it's the last thing I do >:0
#last i checked the vanilla hdt clothes on the nexus didn't cover solstheim content#but i wanted to finally learn to do proper hdt bones myself anyway so its fine :)#this was a nightmarish mess before i separated the black underskirt to its own group#now it swishes around nicely and collides without going through the red outer skirt#i still haven't figured out the crouching/sneaking problem where it'll sometimes phase through the thighs like they don't exist#but that seems to happen to other people's outfits too so maybe it's not just mine? idk yet lol#hmmm i think that back flap thing with the gold trim is gonna have to be separated too. it stretches out weirdly :/#also. should the scarf get to move? maybe just the dangling ends?#bc the rest can't really move since there's nothing under the scarf. it's just glued at the edges to the chest of the outfit#which is good bc it's optimized well so the game isn't rendering the neck part of the robes that you don't even see#but I'd have to create new faces on the mesh to fill in the unseen gaps like i did when splitting the skirts up#and also i'm too lazy to map that new fancy chest area and draw out the missing texture with all the telvanni swirls :'(#help me motivation gods#modding stuff#my posts#i want nelly to be able to swish around prettily like anyone else <3#guys deserve some physic'd outfit love too
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every time i start spiraling and can't hold it in i feel like a stressed out animal locked in a concrete box just scratching and scratching at the walls until i understand that i can't get through the wall and get tired
#i am in agony 😂 it hurts so much#sometimes i start thinking about all the stuff that has happened in the last years#and it *seems* bad but it always just feels like i'm making up excuses to not work and provide for myself and be a proper adult#it always feels like i don't recover as quickly as i'm supposed to and i'm just looking for other people to do things for me instead of#being independent#while other people have it much worse and still work so much without complaining#trying to ask for help feels like i'm using other people because i'm lazy#and if i *really* wanted something i would have already done it#and every day i wake up exhausted and i think to myself that i just need a few more days of rest#but the days of rest never end because i never get any energy to do anything#maybe it would be better for me to just not exist#my head feels like it's a pressurized and full of water and ready to explode
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something something foils moving in opposite directions Goku's always happy to seek and fight stronger opponents because he spent most of his life being the strongest guy in the room and Vegeta wants to be the strongest/is always exhausted to find stronger opponents because he spent most of his life having to navigate his survival around the whims of the strongest guy in the universe room and so Goku has a foundation of safety and stability and so spends his time craving challenge and adventure and Vegeta has a foundation of challenge and adventure and spends his time craving safety and stability and the overlaid section of their venn diagram is that the only way they know how acquire and maintain those things is through battle
#thank you this has been the laziest media analysis post of my career#dbtag#media analysis#something something a game to goku is a threat to vegeta etc#there's a pinned thought here about how Vegeta also didn't learn about the dragon balls until he was ?? 30?? and so all loss is permanent#and goku has been familiar since he was ~12 and hasn't faced a permanent consequence since he was 10 years old and even then he got closure#sometimes I think about how Vegeta saw Trunks die and how Krillin was mad at him for reacting since they could fix it with the dragon balls#but Vegeta has very limited experience with the dragon so to him in that moment that was permanent and Trunks was Dead. Forever.#And we talked before in a 2am post about Vegeta having never experienced grief born of love and I stand by it because his feelings then wer#still very new and very odd and not something he'd accepted until that moment so it was raw power but not as powerful as it could've been#all this to say in my heart of hearts I think Vegeta deserves to retire at the end of super (if super continues) -- not as a warrior#but as an infantryman. he's a prince and now he's got his domain and his family and his planet to look after and I think he deserves#to go home and stay home and help piccolo bully gohan into training more often when goku inevitably leaves to hop the multiverse#geets wanted to take a sabbatical when Bulla was born but didn't get the chance because Freeza coming back freaked him out too much#but whether freeza gets a redemption arc or gets defeated -- Granolah's arc seemed to shift his perspective on being the strongest#and I just grips fist I just think it would be a really nice full circle for Vegeta to inherit his throne in a way he never expected and#finally get his kingdom to look after and protect in the way that he was looking forward to being king of his own planet all those years ag#Goku's got Broly and Jiren and Hit and all the others to keep him busy and happy now -- and if Freeza gets a redemption arc he'll probably#continue playing slap-ass with Goku for the rest of his life -- and Vegeta's got Gohan and Piccolo and Goten and Trunks#I just think them getting a nice bittersweet 'This is where we part ways' would be really nice for both of them because !!#They couldn't have done this without each other. They couldn't have known this kind of life was possible without each other.#So they swap lots and live happier than they ever imagined they could be#especially since Vegeta has proved to himself that he can close any gap Goku creates in progress that's not a concern anymore#And obvs the door's always open!! There's no point closing it Vegeta's tried the locks they don't work on Goku#anyway here's me putting the whole essay in the tags again#this isn't an essay as much as it is stream of consciousness tag blogging#anyway i'm too lazy to write fic or draw comics so we get ramblings instead
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Hm yeah Frimmel is kinda driving me insane nowadays
#IT'S. SO. BEAUTIFUL. AND. SO. TRAGICCCCCC AHHHHHH#himmel was happy to just be a blip in frieren's unimaginably long life! frieren didn't even realize how much that blip meant until decades#after he passed away! SHE'S CHANGING. SO MUCH. IN SUCH POSITIVE WAYS. AND HE HAD SUCH A BIG IMPACT ON IT!!#himmel is the biggest romantic ever like holy shit no one has ever done pining like he has. and it makes him so fucking endearing and cool#he isn't flawless either he's vain & dorky & has made mistakes. I actually really appreciate that all of the og 4 were lowkey weirdos#I totally get why he loved frieren too she's so fucking cool & interesting. I love a lazy yet powerful autistic aroace queen#and omfg the ost is so bittersweet and beautiful just. I'm dreading when the last episode comes out cuz then wtf do I do?#besides read the manga and read more fic and start writing some. the manga has been on hiatus what do I do when I catch up?? someone help me#frimmel
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Hi honey! How are you? How’s your mom doing? I hope she’s better now🥺💚
I’ve recently decided to learn how to book bind bc it’s a must to have my fav fanfics as actual books. I’m still learning and it’s probably gonna take a while before I get the results I want but I wanted to ask you if it was okay with you to book bind The Red Thread? Obviously it would be just for me, I would not sell it or make any profits. (And if it turns out how I want to, I would love to gift you one👀)
It’s one of my favourite fanfics of all time, like it’s a masterpiece and I would love to have a physical copy of it<3
And I know it’s not finished yet but it’d probably have to be a few volumes anyways bc it’s a lot so😅
She's doing ok! Progress is slow but it's definitely happening! She's graduated from at-home physical therapy to outpatient, which is a HUGE thing. We've gotten the house pretty well set up too now (chair lift for a section of stairs not covered before, new railing on the front steps), and between me, dad, and sis's various sleep schedules, we're all able to make sure she has someone nearby when she needs help getting around or opening things. I'm still in caretaker mode and trying to balance everything, but she's getting there, so I hold onto that! As for me, I'm doing... ok I think, considering how exhausting and brutal the past few months have been. I'm taking @shouldbestudying41 's advice and just trying to be kind to myself, and I'll admit my brain seriously needed the break. I continue to miss Cato something awful, but I've felt a little more settled since his ashes came home, and I think I'm starting to adjust to sleeping without him next to my pillow. I also got my follow-up today with my cardiologist on my heart issues and their answer was basically a shrug and a, 'we have no idea why your heart's doing this, but it's getting better every time we test you, so keep doing what you're doing!' Which could be worse. So... I'm getting there. Slow and steady!
And oh my gosh, you absolutely, ABSOLUTELY can bookbind TRT, thank you! 😭The idea anyone would love it enough to bookbind makes me SO FUCKING HAPPY! Hell, if I could sell copies at cost I would, but sadly that's a huge no no and all I can do legally is tell people, YES you can bookbind TRT for your shelf! I'm 100% supportive basically (also I would D I E if I got one, like no pressure at all cause D A Y U M it's a long thing to bind, and also just knowing it's out there on someone's shelf is more than I ever expected would happen so I'm delighted even if you just bind for you!).
TRT volumes one to ten maybe??? LOL. I know I had it planned as a series originally before I decided to just kinda keep it in one thing since we were all already there LOL.
#the red thread#pasta life update#basically mom is doing really well recoverywise! and i'm getting there#the witchy shop has been amazingly supportive and i have people here who've been helping talk me through it along with fam#and the kitties have all been very good cuddlers to me while feeling down about cato#so that's been nice!#and OF COURSE YOU CAN BOOKBIND I LOVE THE IDEA OF BOOKBINDING#i know i've said this before but i never really thought TRT would take off so the idea of ANYONE wanting to bind it is HUGE to me#i always intended it to be a series too and then i just wound up keeping it all in one spot#because... i can't remember#i think i was just feeling lazy when we hit the 'final' chapter of book one and went 'ya'll mind if i keep it all here'#and got a resounding YES THAT'S FINE WE WANT MOAR#and so off we went LOL
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Fred looking Sweet in S O U R
#3$BY era Fred was a fucking fine specimen#I'm a fan of that gritty-low-key-aura that surrounded him before the more “polished” SO and CSATHFW looks (but I still love those looks)#and on another note: look as much as adore young Marshall Mathers (yes I love referring to him by his government name) and his platinum hai#Freddy's platinum blonde hair looked just as beautiful but didn't get as much a spotlight compared to the Detroit rapper#and it's a shame because Fred rocked the look very well and this is my way of showing his bleached hair some much needed love and attention#Okay some of you may know that Sour is my fave 3$BY song/music video.#Making this gifset made me realize another reason why I love it so much. All the guys just look so fucking good in this video.#visually I've always found this video pleasing and the way the guys were filmed complimented them very well.#Fun Fact about my silly blog: Fred was the only LB member that I hadn't made a SOUR gifset about up until this point.#Congrats Freddy! You helped closed out my SOUR gifset series.#I'm too lazy to link all my other SOUR gifsets on this post. Just look through my blog's archive if you're really curious I guess.#Fred Durst#Limp Bizkit#nu-metal#Freddy D#The Chocolate Starfish is My Man Fred Durst#On my Freddy D bullshit for Fred Durst Friday#down the rabbit hole
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Chibi Makemake and Pluto!!!!
I love them >_<
I'm sorry for this lazy and terrible art,i will try to draw something better!!!
#solarballs#solarballs fanart#solarballs makemake#solarballs pluto#solarballs art#dwarf planets#humanization#chibi art#chibi#cute chibi#I WAS LOVING MY ARTSTYLE UNTIL NOW IDK WHAT HAPPENED I'M SO SORRY RAAHH#I'm getting really lazy help me#deez nuts#is this real#i want to cut off my hands
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spent 80% of my day making the pain-in-the-ass squares for my ace jon quilt and consequently my body is 80% pain now
#there are two squares from the fanart#and one of them is extremely nice to do with just squares and rectangles#and - crucially - i cut them out correctly#the showpiece squares are much more fiddly and i'm going to go back in time and beat myself for not cutting the pieces out correctly#the hourglass blocks are all a half inch too small and i don't know what i did with the 2.5 squares but they are shit as well#but there are only five showpiece squares left to do now so i can absolutely knock those out in another day#and then i'll get to work on the filler squares and making rows#i really wasn't sure i'd be able to get this quilt done by end of year but batch sewing really helped#so if i can Focus and also Not Break My Back with this. i might even get the top done by the end of this month???#and then it's on to the worst part. the absolute worst part. finding backing.#(but also this is if i go the square route. whereas my original plan would add another 2 rows)#(and i was getting lazy but like........... 7x9 quilt............extremely good vibes from a 7x9 quilt........)#but then there's ALSO what i'm planning on doing about the actual quilting#because with all the very close calls with too-small blocks i probably NEED some dense quilting#but i haven't figured out my free-hand quilting foot and i don't want to practice on a quilt i've poured myself into already#so.......i guess i'll have to send it away 🥺#agh i'm Tired i just want to have the finished thing in my hands#BUT WILL THEY LET ME BIND IT? binding it is my favorite step i need to bind it myself i can't deal with strangers doing my baby's binding#i don't know!! and my back hurts too much to think about it anymore#quilting tag
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Gonna have to bust out the comm sheet soon bc work is not scheduling me and. frankly. I simply do not want to be there as of late
#management change has been BRUTAL but we're working on it#anyways. need to get the business email set up bc i lowkey don't really wanna keep putting my full legal name out there lmao#i just. hope i can feel good enough to carry this out. all the time off and i feel so eh bc of work stuff#i wish it didn't bother me so much!! i don't WANT it to bother me this much!! i want to make art and make art for ppl bc i love to make art#maybe i'll go for a walk and feel like the light is coming back into my life.#also the extra money would really help me pay down my credit card debt so i'll be including that in the sheet lmao#it'll be a pretty simple sheet. flat rate. feeling lazy about it but i wanna be a little more serious about it this time#bc i uh. would really like to not be in debt if i can help it lmao. i'm making it work but it could also work better#anyways. keep your eyes open for that!#shai speaks
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Singing employment paperwork be like "I, Legal Name I Don't Identify With, of not particularly sound mind nor especially able body, agree under coercion of society and so not exactly of my own volition, to give This Job all of my spoons and then some 5-7 days a week, in exchange for not enough money to move out of my parents house."
#i only work 3 days a week but it takes all my spoons for 6 because I have to recover and it sucks ass#I don't know how to get my family to understand that I'm not lazy and all my sleeping isn't just to avoid them like#im not sure what's wrong but it's something and just being alive is so exhausting already#work leaves me so wiped I work two days in a row sleep for twelve hours work my third day and sleep another twelve hours and then I'm so#sore that I kind of just have to shuffle around my house doing stretches and taking painkillers and naps because I still can't get fully#awake yet. then I have my One Good Day where I feel fully awake and can do fun things or partake in hobbies! I feel fully alive that one day#usually! but then I have to start mentally preparing for work again and can't help thinking I'd rather do Anything Else#and it sucks to not be a person 6 days a week... just an NPC existing to work and sleep#flipping between work mode and recovery mode and survival mode never really awake enough to feel fully human or good
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good morning!! <333
#woo almost finished with exploration#got like 92% through it#and i have 53/55 hydroculus (which i'm certain two are in the final area of the quest so I'm basically caught up there)#then the shrine of depths + whatever chests are in the last area should get me the rest of the way there#bc i've explored everything else lol i think there's only one other thing i could do if that doesn't work (like a fighting challenge thingy#so that's fun!!#then i'll get to do arlecchino's story quest when I'm done (aka likely tomorrow)#also tomorrow starts the new zayne banner + it's diluc's birthday so it's gonna be a fun day :3#today should be as well#thankfully it's less rainy so that'll help make today a little less of a sleepy/lazy day#anyways#really putting rambling in the rambles tag this morning lol#but i hope today/tonight is kind to you <333#morning rambles
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GOD my heart aches every time I see the black Dartmoor
#it looks so much like my heart horse that never was (except the Dartmoor is missing a little white marking he had)#he was at the barn where a family member had their horse. a little too poorly cared for... he refused to be rideable (past abuse probably)#and they just didnt bother with him much. he was so so so pretty but his mane was always tangled and hooves out of form and stuff#whenever I came along I'd spend the whole time there just caring for him. brushing out the tangles. braiding his mane. oiling his hooves.#(just braiding the mane could take 20-30 minutes. it was so long and beautiful)#i brought him along for hacks in a halter and lead rope whenever i could. the lazy fuck (affectionate) REFUSED to go faster than a walk#but I am also a lazy fuck so it fit me pretty well tbh#in the beginning he was really tentative towards me and the stable owner had to help me go get him. but eventually he started coming to me#wasn't much of a cuddly type but you know in your heart when a horse enjoys your company don't you#my life got in the way too much because I was in high school commuting 90 minutes one way#but. sigh. what we could've had if I wasn't so freaking busy all the time :(#I'm not even sure he's alive anymore. I think it's been four years since my family member moved their horse and his fur was graying then#wasn't a dartmoor though#papers claimed him as a dole horse but his papers were untrustworthy loll. he looked more like a fell or maybe dales pony#z talks
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Getting really tired how every time I mention talking to someone new my mom's like "omg lol! Move in with them! Lol! Have you thought about moving in with them? Lol? Will they take you? Lol. We're so tired of you complaining lol can you just move in with them? Lol!"
Like. Wow! I never fucking thought of that one! Damn mom! Wow!!!! Revolutionary.
It's so fucking annoying because if I COULD actually move out don't you think I would have done it now? Hell. I'd be towns away if I could. Anything to get out of this fucking house. Away from your parents. Away from the constant walking on eggshells I'm doing. Away from feeling like the only way I'll be safe is by ripping myself open until I'm raw and used. But I CAN'T.
And every fucking time like clockwork it's "oh move in with x lol!"
#elias howls#shes so ready to help me until I actually need the help and then it's radio fucking silence. But I have it so good don't i.not paying rent#no push to get anything. no bills. no nothing. mommy and daddy love me dont they. my mom texts me do you think i abandoned you 🥺 i love you#🥺🥺 don't be mad at me we're best friends you and I#and then when I want her there for me as a parent as a friend she doesn't fucking do anything and lets the problem fester#oh but familys so important!#i was never part of this pack. I wasn't the moment I grew teeth.#its so fucking frustrating and its so fucking depressing and I'm tired and all I want is for it to be okay I just want to wake up happy.#How long till someone realizes I'm just not even there.#I'm going to get my license this year I'm positive and thats a step towards being out but even with it what can i fucking do. the economy is#shit. i cant handle two jobs. i can barley handle one job when i have one. Why am i so fucking lazy!!!!! Its my own hole and i just keep di#gging jt deeper when it rains so it's muddy and i slip and its like fucking quicksand. Will I suffocate or drown first? Learned hopelessness#begs to answer. The sun shines brighter after the storm says something else. Well I just want to exist in my house without feeling on edge l#ike w trapped pray animal who's going to turn to cannibalism as a form of soothing myself.#oh but right. what do i have to be stressed about? im making it all up because im jobless and im not really stressed Im not even an adult i#have nothing to worry about! LOL!
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