#I'm a sucker for tragedy

[ghostface-knight]

Soda tapped his foot against the creaky wooden floor. He glanced at the clock for what felt like the thousandth time. 3:30 in the morning. He had thought surely Ponyboy would come home as soon as he cooled off.

He wasn't expecting Pony to immediately forgive Darry. Hell, Soda himself hadn't entirely forgiven his older brother, who sat, head clutched in his hands, on the couch.

Still, he understood how Darry could have done what he did. When Pony didn't come home, Soda and Darry had thought the worst possible. However, it seemed that Soda's worry had translated into relief at seeing him brother okay, while Darry's had instantly become anger.

The silence of the house was unbearable. It was like the crack of Darry's hand against Pony's face had deafened the brothers to the world.

Finally, Soda shot up from his seat. Darry didn't turn to look at him.

"I'm looking for him." He said simply as he gathered his shoes and his jacket. He realized with a pang in his chest that Pony had run out without a jacket on. He must be so cold.

Darry remained silent.

"What, you're not even going to help me look?" Soda asked.

Darry finally looked up from his hands, and Soda saw tears brimming his eyes. "Do you really think he wants to see me?" Darry said gruffly.

Soda stilled. "No, I... I guess not." He turned on his heel, then walked out the door and shut it behind him.

He shook thoughts of Darry from his mind. Right now, he had to focus on finding Pony and bringing him home.

The first place he thought to check was the lot, where Pony and Johnny had apparently fallen asleep just a few hours prior. He walked across the gravel, softly calling Ponyboy's name. He received no response.

He wandered throughout Tulsa for hours, searching for his brother. The whole east side was eerily quiet.

As the black sky shifted into the pink and orange sunrise, Soda made his way back to his house.

When he pushed the door open and walked in, he heard Darry rushing from the kitchen.

"Pony! Pony, I'm real sorry, I never-" Darry trailed off when he entered the room, and saw Soda standing all alone. "Soda? Did you find Pony?"

Soda shook his head, exhausted. "I'm calling the guys. Maybe he stayed with one of them." Darry nodded, guilt ridden.

Soda called Two-Bit, Steve, and Dally, one by one, and none of them had seen Ponyboy since the drive in. In fact, none of them had seen Johnny either. Soda felt sick with the fear that rattled around in his stomach. The gang agreed to meet them at their house, and help them look.

Once they had gathered, they split up to cover more ground. It was decided that Steve and Soda would keep looking around the East Side, and Dally, Darry and Two-Bit would take Buck's car over to the West side, in case Pony had done something real stupid in his rage and fear.

Soda shuddered as he and Steve made their way around town. They started walking through the park they had played at as kids, when Steve spoke up.

"Little shit got himself into trouble again." He muttered. "He knows Darry don't mean it. He knows you two were worrying your heads off."

Soda felt the need to defend his little brother. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "No, Pony wasn't wrong. Darry shouldn't have blown up at him. He should have known-"

"Soda." Steve's tone was deathly serious behind him. Soda turned, and saw that Steve had stopped a few steps earlier. He stared past Soda with a look of utter disbelief, his eyes glazing over.

Soda whipped around to see what he was looking at.

First, he just saw the pool of red. Then, he noticed the forms surrounding it.

He wanted to run. But his body felt like it was moving in slow motion. He stumbled towards the first of the bodies -- the one in the pool of blood -- and dread sank in his gut. It was Johnny, lying there, with his eyes open wide and blood plastered across his shirt, spreading from a deep gash in the center of his chest. There was a pocket knife laying still in the pool of blood, and Soda realized with the jolt that it was Johnny's own knife.

That was when Soda set his eyes on the second figure.

He was slumped over the brim of the fountain, unmoving, with his face submerged in the water.

Soda stood very slowly, as if moving too quick could startle the situation into getting worse. He stepped around Johnny's body, unflinching when Steve started yelling at him.

He reached the second body, and grabbed him under his arms to hoist the figure out from under the water.

He was so heavy.

Still, Soda was strong. He lifted the body out of the water, and set it down on the pavement.

Soda sat down beside the body as it dawned on him that this boy was his brother.

"P- pony?" Soda stuttered. He grabbed Ponyboy's shoulder and shook him. "Pony, Ponyboy, wake up." He shook him harder. "Pony, what are you doing?"

"Soda..." he heard Steve call desperately to him. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Steve clutching Johnny's corpse. Soda didn't care though.

"Pony, get up! It's not funny, Pone, you can't-- you need to-- just wake up!" Soda's words were becoming increasingly strained, but he was scared to shake him to hard. He didn't want to hurt him.

"Jesus, Soda!" Steve shouted from right beside him. When had Steve gotten there? "Soda! Soda look at me!" Soda forced himself to make eye contact with his best friend.

"We're going to give him CPR, okay? I'll do the chest compressions, and you'll breathe into his mouth." Soda didn't quite know what was going on, but Steve sounded so sure of himself that Soda found himself blindly following his orders. Soda easily ignored the drying blood on Steve's hands. Johnny's blood.

Steve delivered round after round of compressions, between which Soda performed the rescue breaths. It went on for what felt like forever. Suddenly, Steve stopped. He fell back on his heels beside Soda. Soda gawked at him.

"What- what are you doing? Come on, we need to give him CPR, to save him, remember? Come on!"

Steve finally met his eyes. "He's gone, man. We can't save him."

Just then, it finally clicked in Soda's head.

Gone.

He turned his head back to his brother, in horror, as the sounds of shouting began to echo behind him.

Darry, he thought numbly and he grasped Pony's shoulders and pulled his baby brother's head and chest into his lap.

That was Darry, Dally, and Two-Bit. He knew their voices. Still, he didn't turn around. He just wrapped his arms around Pony's cold body.

Even though he never turned away from his brother, he could still hear every beat of the scene play out.

He heard Darry calling his name between strides, then he heard his big brother crumble to the ground as he tripped over something.

Something that, then, caused Dally to begin screaming and cursing and praying to God.

Funny, thought Sodapop. I've never heard Dally pray.

He heard Darry pick himself up from off the ground, and slowly approach from behind.

"Soda?" He called hesitantly. Soda didn't turn.

"Soda, is that-" he heard Darry choke. "Did you find Ponyboy?"

Soda nodded, even though he knew Darry couldn't see.

He stared down at Pony, clutching him even tighter as Darry made his way into his peripheral vision. Suddenly, Darry was on his knees beside Soda, trying to pry their littlest brother from his grip.

"Pony! Soda, let me see him!" Darry cried, but Soda just held on tighter.

Soda's eyes were open, but they saw no more than those of his brother he held in his arms. Still, he heard.

He heard Darry sobbing and begging to see Ponyboy.

He heard Dally cursing God.

He heard Steve and Two-Bit trying not to cry as they tried to no avail to pry their grieving friends away from the dead bodies of the boys who had been like their brothers.

He heard the voices of neighborhood kids and workers start to crowd around them to inspect the scene.

Soda looked up and saw the last remaining wisps of pink and orange fizzling out of the sky.

Pony always loved sunrises.

How bout Pony dies at the fountain WITH Johnny? Add a little twist, make it fun. The gang is looking for them and stumbles across them in the park or something. (Maybe literally depending on how dark it is and how much angst you want)

[otiksimr]

LOVE IT WHEN WOF HYBRIDS HAVE PHYSICAL ISSUES-

LOVE IT WHEN WOF HYBRIDS HAVE PHYSICAL ISSUES BECAUSE YOU'RE MIXING TRIBES HAVE DIFFERENT PHSYICAL TRAITS WHICH COULD CAUSE ABNORMALITIES IN THE CHILD AND OVERALL GIVE THEM A WORSE LIFE EXPERIENCE.

[shyvioletlife]

It doesn't matter how much time passes, I am always in awe over the way that drosselmeyer is written in princess tutu. He is omnipresent from the word go, his meddling eyes watching the show with us and giggling about this wonderful tragedy that is set to unfold. Every time his eyes appear on the screen it feels not just like a god staring down the characters and making them dance to his whim, but like he is looking you, the viewer, dead in the eye and taunting you. A playwright who wants nothing but beautiful terrible tragedy for all involved inviting you to attend his latest theatrical debut.

I feel to the core of my being every time the characters lament their lot in life, doomed by the narrative, because that fate is not something ordained by uncaring gods. Drosselmeyer wants to see his characters grasp at any chance of hope or happiness only so he can watch the look on their faces as it slips from their hands and out of reach. He cares very deeply about their strife because he has hand crafted it just for them. As every episode passes I feel the desperation of the characters as if it is my own

The thought of undermining Drosselmeyer becomes insurmountably daunting, too, the longer the story goes on. The closer his work is to completion the more power he seems to hold, and the knot tightens its grip around every character in the story to a painful degree by the end. To become such an overwhelming threat as the final villain of the story is truly a work of art, and by the end of my watchthroughs I am always booing and yelling at the guy every time he comes on screen. Even though I know how the story goes I am wracked with the desire for Drosselmeyer to get his comeuppance and the cast of princess tutu to wrench their fates out of his grasp, and the catharsis of the end is as true and harrowing as any tragedy that man could hope to write.

[blujello]

All that shitting on ships aside i fuckn love Lynxfall it's genuinely a great ship

Snowfall CRYING at the prospect of Lynx going on some mission to another continent bc she's so afraid Lynx'll maybe die is so heartwarming to see specifically from her bc of her usual cold attitude

It's such a great way to show that Snowfall does truly treasure Lynx's companionship (platonic or romantic either work i just happen to love them as a couple)

I also absolutely love that Lynx blocks Tundra while Snowfall breaks the name wall idk why i just really like that scene

[sysig]

Time Loops are they/them culture (Patreon)

Bonus of my little guy in ISaT style:

[rawr-mortgage]

Quotes that remind me of The Alice Gang

1. Grief Lessons: Four Plays by Euripides, Anne Carson / 2. Waiting for Godot, Samuel Beckett / 3. Orestes by Euripides, trans. E.P. Coleridge / 4. H of H Playbook, Anne Carson / 5. Electra, Sophocles / 6. Antigone, Jean Anouilh 7. Orestes by Euripides, trans. Phillip Vellacot / 8. Eurydice, Sarah Ruhl / 9. unknown / 10-11-17. Norwegian Wood, Haruki Murakami / 12. The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis / 13. For Good, Wicked the Musical (2003) / 14. Hannibal Screenplay Season 3 Ep. 3 “Secondo”, Bryan Fuller / 15. @esakao on tumblr / 16. Mark of Athena, Rick Riordan

[anjasitdown]

I have so many Thoughts I wanna say before I move on from the Public Safety Arc. There'll be manga spoilers by the way.

To be honest, I put off watching Chainsaw Man when I heard the protagonist's sole aim in life is to... touch boobs. I thought Denji was just like any other shonen MCs with perverted tendencies. I tried watching because it was animated by Mappa, but I stayed because of Aki, Denji, and Power (and Meowy). But as I reached the ending of Public Safety Arc, I realized Denji's more complex than that.

All his life Denji was deprived of basic needs; he couldn't even afford the bare minimum. He didn't get to experience love from a parent or admiration from his peers. Denji craved so much for love and affection, but the only way he knew how to get that was through sexual intimacy with a woman. Receiving affection from friends is completely foreign to him. That's why when he and Power did that in the bathroom, Denji's like, "Wait a minute... that's it?" Deep down Denji knew there's more to love than that—there's more to affection than just touching breasts. The moment he started to realize that, Makima just had to twist his mind and turn him back to his sexual urges (screw u for that makima btw).

Throughout the whole arc, Denji continued to believe in his idea that love is just about touch and sex. He ran after women after women who fulfilled that but left him feeling hollowed because, well, they tried to kill him afterwards. It's actually entertaining to watch Denji finally gets his first kiss only to get barfed on the mouth and his second got his tongue cut off. And Makima, the woman he truly loved, not only used him but also discarded him when she got what she wanted. Most of those women don't see Denji as more than a dog. Denji is just some dumb boy who doesn't deserve the normal life he's having.

But Denji really is just some boy. But he's Aki and Power's boy. There's nothing special about him. Aki and Power know that because they looked beyond the Chainsaw—they saw Denji as he is, and accepted him. People treated Denji like a dog and no one saw his worth as a person. But not Aki and Power. Aki gave him a house, taught him and Power manners, cooked for them, and taught him how to cook. Aki treated Denji and Power as his own. And Power, as unhinged and selfish as she is (affectionate), relied so much on Denji. I think that trust taught him to be a better person. To have someone rely on you can make you feel loved and respected. That's why helping Power overcome the fear of the Darkness Devil felt so natural to him. Sleeping with her on the same bed, taking a bath together, and Power walking in on him while he's on the toilet didn't feel naughty (as Denji said). The love Denji's searching for everywhere has always been in front of him: Aki and Power.

Makima can tell Denji she fabricated everything for all I care, saying everything has been a lie and that she set it all up to destroy Denji's mind and heart. But what Aki and Power felt toward Denji was real because they were the only ones who truly loved Denji without asking for anything in return. They saw him as he is, and loved him.

My precious children 🥺🥺🥺 I'm going to miss them

[lazy-toad]

I think a lot about w.bg and time travel introduced as a way to save people. Mike puts himself through the woe.begone challenges because it could save Matt. The compound is developing time travel for use in medicine. Characters are regularly quite brutally killed only to be brought back later in one piece.

From a glance death does not seem to matter much thanks to time travel technology. And yet. Hunter's mom is brought back still sick and Michael tried for an entire year to save Edgar only for it to be entirely unsuccessful.

You can stop someone from getting into a car that's going to crash later that day but you can't travel back in time to ask someone's body very nicely to not suddenly, inexplicably give up on them. You have the potential to save yourself and your loved ones from death and yet you can never truly escape it no matter how many loopholes you find to put it off.

[aroacenezhaanddainsleif]

sigh. i want people to discuss silly little khaenri'ah life hcs with me. yeah the tragedy of the nation but like. what if tailors and servants and midsummer festivals and samhain. what if scottish/irish/norse folk songs and jigs. what if jousts and tourneys and making dumb poses in front of field tillers. what if they were human

[snarkspawn]

Ok, So I adore your KenBig art even though I have absolutely zero idea of what the fandom is about haha, would love to hear more about them because I can tell you're so passionate.

Thank you so much! 

I am !! Very Passionate about them yes adhjfkshjks let me try to break them down for you without making it a 3 hour TED talk lmao (no promises)

So they're two minor side characters from the Thai bl series KinnPorsche, also known as The Gay Mafia Show. At the beginning of the series Big is the head bodyguard for Kinn, who he is secretly (and quite hopelessly) in love with and who is the heir to the family's mafia empire. He is Loyal with a capital L, fiercely protective of Kinn, a little (a lot) pathetic in his devotion and quite frankly a bit of a dick. Ken is just Ken his best friend, also a bodyguard for the Main Family and also a bit of a dick. He's from Australia originally and brings us delightful iconic phrases like "nice one, loser" and "are you fucking dumb, bro". Also, pineapple boxer briefs. You mostly see the two of them together and when they show up it's usually to be a bitch and/or to bully Porsche, who is the other main character and love interest for Kinn (hence the name of the show).

They're terrible people is what I'm saying. But then again so is almost everyone else on the show lmao it's the mafia ok!!

It's never explicitly stated in the show but we see other bodyguards room together (namely Porsche and Pete) so the widely accepted headcanon is that Ken and Big are roommates (oh my god they were roommates etc etc) and just because I live for this kind of thing I have convinced myself (and others, apparently! through the power of art) that while Big is hopelessly in love with Kinn (canon), Ken is hopelessly in love with Big (canon in my heart). It's about the pining and the tragedy and a secret third thing (jealousy) for me

Well. I don't want to spoil too much in case you're ever planning on watching it but it's kind of important for them, so ... towards the end of the show Big ends up sacrificing himself for Porsche (or rather, for Kinn's happiness) and dies not knowing that Ken is the mole they've been searching for and is actually working for the Minor Family (so, for Kinn's cousin and uncle who are the main villains in the series). But Ken is killed as well, at roughly the same time just at a different place and at the hand of his actual employer Gun, so they both end up dead.

Which, you know, I personally think is unacceptable because I love them and don't want it to end there, so most (but not all) of my art is set in an AU that I brainstormed with my partner @pharawee in which they both survive and then have to deal with the consequences of their actions (which is absolutely delicious to me because man!! You have Big who is so desperately loyal but has been kind of struggling to find his place now that Porsche is there, and Ken who betrayed everything Big held dear but !! Is also his best friend!!! But is he really? Has he ever really been his friend at all?? And if Ken is a traitor what does that make him who has been sharing everything with him?? Bonus points since Ken is in love with him and never wanted to betray Big personally. So much potential for angst I am telling you, it's a feast), and then eventually they find comfort in each other and carve out their own path. If you're interested you can read the beginning on ao3.

In other headcanons there's been a Thing going on between them all along and sometimes they still die. Or they don't but everything is still fucked up. Either way it's all good and I'm here for all of it hehe

So this is shaping up to turn into that 3 hour TED talk after all which is why I'll stop here, but if you have literally any other questions or are interested in hearing more I would be prepared to go on for hours lmao sorry (but not really).

[gamebunny-advance]

Random Thought

So, a while back I posted a pic of all the Pokemon dudes that I like despite knowing basically nothing about Pokemon, and it's become a very shocking fact to me that despite their apparent popularity, the train dudes do basically nothing in their home game.

[flecks-of-stardust]

her pups weren't even in this dream, all i could do was stab a scavenger...

i did wonder about this in the last dream, but the pitch of the dream sound has been consistently lowering and. my god it sounds so ominous. everything about this is so ominous. what the fuck happened to arti?

i am having so much fun in metropolis blowing scavs up, but i am also in AGONY. i've been fighting this toll for like two hours. i've gotten past it maybe three times. i want to explore PLEASE

[kenobihater]

tumblr girlies when the tragic media has tragedy in it

[benevolenterrancy]

hello! what kind of fic tropes are your favorite (for reading or writing!)?

Hi!

Ohhh, honestly it really depends on my mood, but I really gravitate towards ones that set up Weird Situations... I really like seeing how people think characters would respond in those sorts of situations!

I love soulmate aus, bodyswaps, fake dating, arranged marriages... sickfics, misunderstandings, ~*whump*~ in any form I can get it! Though I can't stand sad endings, I demand my whump with a healthy dose of hurt/comfort! Force these characters into extreme situations where they're forced to communicate or rely on others in ways they normally wouldn't!!

[hexaonic]

ok buckle up longform essay on SatoSugu incoming

this thing was written for a friend in google docs and it is six. pages. long

the brainrot is real and it is driving me insane so HERE WE GO

In any interpretation of the relationship between Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru – lovers, close friends, brothers, etc. – the dynamic and story between them is (at least to me) incredibly tragic.

You have Gojo, who’s the Honored One - born into one of the three most powerful clans with two rare and frankly op techniques that render him a god amongst men and the Strongest sorcerer in jujutsu society - The strongest is untouchable, too high up for anyone else to reach, destined to be lonely at the top and exploited by the rulers of this society as a trump card, a weapon, for the rest of his life

Until he’s not.

Enter Geto - a sorcerer born from non-sorcerers, with the ability to manipulate curses. But his cursed technique is painful, and requires him to swallow the curses he exorcises in order to absorb them; he himself describes the taste as a “rag used to wipe shit and vomit”. If Gojo is a star or the sun he is the earth, closer to the curses they purge from the world than probably anyone else - after all, he ingests them. I’ve seen fics where they describe the curses affecting his mental state, eating him up from the inside and shouting at him in his head - but that’s not canon, and it just makes me sad, so I put it in cause I’m talking about the tragedy anyway. Geto is strong - cracked at martial arts and skillful with his cursed technique, and together he and Gojo are the strongest.

The two strongest sorcerers are tasked with delivering Riko, the star plasma vessel, to Tengen. They grow attached and are very aware that Riko is scared of the merger and wants to stay longer on the earth with her friends and her beloved maid and them, and they indulge her as long as they can before she goes. But they bring her to the school and she dies anyway, by the hands of the urban legend that is Toji Fushiguro - and Gojo, for the first time in his life, comes close to death. Geto, who has never once seen Gojo weak, is in reasonable shock and horror when Toji kills Riko right in front of him, then pronounces his untouchable best friend dead. He fights and is defeated, but not killed, and Toji leaves. Gojo survives with RCT and his new unlocked Hollow Purple, and kills Toji - but when he finds Riko and Suguru steps into the room, he is in a bit of a hollow mental state (which is understandable - riko is dead, he just made what is probably his first kill in his life, and the people who are at least indirectly responsible are clapping and celebrating her fucking death) and asks Suguru if he should kill them. Suguru says no - that there would be no meaning to it, and that meaning is everything - especially to sorcerers. And Satoru follows, because Geto is the moral compass for both of them.

It must be understood that Suguru is a moral person, but in a careful and objective way - he seems to organize things into neat boxes of “right” and “wrong”, “meaningful” and “meaningless”, and holds a strong sense of justice and responsibility that keeps him in the sorcery race even when he has to swallow vomit-curses and watch people die around him. But it grates on him, a lot, and the grieving and vomit and the ignorance of the non-sorcerers he is supposed to be saving, those he once believed were sorcerers’ responsibility to protect against curses, builds up on his psyche like a mold or an infection and keeps growing. When Yuki talks to Geto after the death of Haibara, she plants the idea in his head that yes, cursed energy does come from almost exclusively non-sorcerers and yes, eradicating cursed energy is possible in multiple ways, and yes, eradicating all non-sorcerers is technically a feasible solution, he struggles with that. A lot. At this point he is already spiraling really badly and questioning everything about his morality and his moral compass and his entire life purpose, and takes this idea to heart.

Meanwhile, his near-death and his power evolving during his final fight shook Gojo to his core and pushed him to be stronger no matter the cost. He got good at using his Limitless cursed technique at all times, being able to control it and its branch techniques with great efficiency so that he could never be caught off guard again. He gets sent on more missions, as he truly becomes the strongest - but in this process, he unknowingly begins to leave Geto behind. Gojo works best alone, when nobody is there to become collateral damage for him, and the authorities in charge send him on solo mission after solo mission. He is too blinded by his own pursuit of strength and his perception of Geto - the morally righteous one, his keeper, his compass, his best friend - to see his counterpart dying a little bit more with every passing day he is left to rot in his own mind. 

Geto sees this disconnect between him and Gojo and it adds another straw to his very quickly growing spiral haystack, and at some point it has to snap. And it does - he is sent on a solo mission to a rural village, where they have locked two sorcerer girls in a cage and blame them for the things happening to their town. Even after Geto exorcises and swallows the curse that was causing the problems in the first place, the village people blame the girls for their powers. It enrages him, and probably makes him think of Haibara and Gojo and the culmination of all the things non-sorcerers do to sorcerers in the name of ignorance, of hunting and eradicating anything that is “other” or “alien”, of the man who nearly killed him and his best friend and called himself a monkey. How the deaths of his friends have all been undeserved, caused by something they could not control or even foresee, how sorcery is all just a race to the bloody, unjustified, meaningless end. Something in Geto snaps, and he massacres the entire town and takes the girls under his wing with his new conviction: that he hates monkeys, and they deserve to die.

Gojo and Geto have their kfc breakup. Gojo is genuinely shocked that the one person who always caught up with him, and was always there by his side when nobody else ever really could be, turned around and committed mass murder when Gojo didn’t even know Geto was suffering, and Geto takes this as Gojo’s ignorance, too: that while he was here spiraling and rotting to the point that he snapped, Gojo was the strongest. Untouchable. Exalted by all and therefore not knowing, or caring, what it would feel like to doubt his own morality or fear the inevitable death of everyone around him in the brutal world of curses and sorcerers. Geto believes that the life of a sorcerer has no meaning - that the endless race of kill or be killed from adolescence to an early grave is a dead end, a pointless suicide mission, generation after generation of lemmings culled by the sorrows of the weak - by the ones they swear to protect. (Some stories spin it a slightly different way, where Geto and Gojo are in love - and seeing Gojo work himself to the bone to be a living weapon all his life, seeing his one and only isolated like this, kills him more than the thought of being hated for freeing him. They theorize that this is the main conviction that drives him to go through with the plan to kill all non-sorcerers.) 

So he leaves, and is branded as a curse user to all of jujutsu society. He is to be killed on sight. But Gojo is the one to confront him, and when he raises his hand to kill his best friend he can’t do it. (“Kill me,” Geto says as he walks away. “There’d be meaning in that, too.”)

The Honored One and the Cursed. The Heavens and the Earth, the Righteous and the Damned. One blessed with innate kindness, and snap moral judgment - one cursed with an infinite moral dilemma, relegated to careful deliberation and action to carry out justice. One with a cursed technique that could be compared to ascension, unlimited power and enhanced perception and untouchable beauty, so high up he is unreachable as heaven itself - one with a cursed technique that could be described as bottom-feeding, damning, so low compared to the veritable God he walks beside that it seems the curses he swallows and the pain he carries could sink him into the earth all the way down to hell.

Yin and Yang, two halves of a whole that circle each other, but never really touch. 

Gojo’s Infinity ensures that. 

In their separation they both adopt children - Geto the girls he saved from the village, Gojo the kids he saved from the clan that had produced and rejected Toji. Geto becomes a cult leader, amassing curses and money and followers by tolerating “monkeys” and healing their “ailments” and swallowing their curses. Gojo becomes a teacher, swearing that as long as he is there nobody will be alone again. (Shoko was there - has always been there - but that is a different tragedy altogether.)

They meet again in JJK 0. Geto declares war on all of jujutsu society, the Night Parade of a Thousand Demons (I think), and Gojo fights alongside the school. Yuuta and his own tragedy, Rika - his lost childhood love whom he accidentally cursed to remain on this earth and torment him, letting nobody close to her lover - face off against Geto at Jujutsu tech. When Yuuta accepts all of Rika and she fully manifests her power, the strongest curse Geto has ever seen, he begins to fight in earnest. (I’ve heard theories that maybe Geto is so unwilling to accept that Yuuta and Rika are truly in love during that fight because that would mean that him leaving everyone he cared about, and the one he truly loved, in order to save them from a life of suffering was completely unnecessary, and he could have had love and a purpose - he could have had Gojo -without all the pain he caused himself and Gojo and everyone who’d cared about him back.)

Yuuta defeats him. Satoru and Suguru are left alone after everyone has left, one painfully mortal and one painfully untouchable. Destined to fight each other. One cursed to die, one cursed to live. No matter the dynamic that was between them, their last words are a tender moment and a testament to the affection and care they still hold for each other, even after their ideals and their lives have strayed so far from each other in adulthood. Gojo kills Geto, but does not have the heart to dispose of his best friend’s body - which is what relegates Geto to the role of puppet, used to carry out Kanjaku’s agenda. In a way Gojo really did curse him, in the end.

Breaking the fourth wall, there are little elements outside the story that make it so painful as well.

Gege Akutami, the mangaka who created this whole universe and its characters and their dynamics (I look up to him, kinda, for the pain he makes me feel) has given details in author’s notes and interviews that make SatoSugu all the more painful. For starters, he agreed with the producer’s(?) statement, which describes Geto as Gojo’s “first and last warm spring of youth” which,, ow; and then he makes it so Geto’s priestly cult man robes are a design that literally have part of Gojo’s name in it (I can’t find the actual name but it’s in there) and in one author’s note or filler issue of the jump he gives us songs that remind him of each character and one of Gojo’s is about heartbreak and love and LITERALLY WORD FOR WORD could describe the dynamic between the two.

BUT THAT’S NOT ALL!!

The anime, in season 2, opens with Ao no Sumika and ends with Akari - I think the opening and ending are meant to be Gojo’s perspective and Geto’s, respectively. The lyrics line up - the opening is fun and lively and bright but still foreshadows pain and heartbreak in the lyrics and certain frames of the sequence, and the ending is vaguely melancholy in lyrics, melody, and color; it’s even raining, and half the time Geto appears on the screen he is doused in shadow. In the opening the singer literally reflects on how the brightness/loudness of being with this person drowned out their silence (which cmon that’s satosugu for certain), and ruminates on the unsaid “will we meet again?” between singer and subject. (which AGAIN, SATOSUGU) And one of my favorite ever sequences in that ending sequence is a pair of scenes that show first Gojo, his eyes following a black beta fish with spiky, damaged fins and tail; and then Geto, his eyes downcast, looking away from a white beta fish that is whole and healthy, almost glowing. It’s my favorite way their dynamic is symbolized in the anime and the most painful - just these two frames themselves are enough to foreshadow their entire story. Gojo cares about Geto, and follows him - he wants him to come back. He wants him to be by his side again, for them to be the strongest again. But he doesn’t even notice Geto’s departure until the fish is already on its way off the screen. The fins on the black beta fish are damaged because Geto is sick, because Geto is spiraling, because beta fish whose fins are damaged and sickly like that are typically not far off from dying. Geto looks away from the healthy white beta fish - he turns his back on love. He thinks it’s pointless, and accepts like a martyr that to save Gojo from his fate at the hands of this world he will have to hurt him by destroying it, and likely dying because of it. What’s more - two male beta fish can’t be in the same tank together. They’ll fight to the death until only the strongest is left.

Gojo and Geto are tragic because it’s so clear that Gege wrote them as a duo, two halves of a whole, two sides of a coin. They are foils as much as they are literally meant for each other in any way that phrase can be interpreted, and yet they are destined to fall apart in the end. One is destined to kill the other, then live with the grief that comes from it. The strongest is fated to survive at the cost of the other, stranded on a pedestal that is covered in blood. They are kids, thrust into an endless cycle of death and pain and suffering and gore because it is their responsibility to protect the people that cannot help themselves, and when the two strongest children are met with the horror of it all one breaks and drops out, and one continues the race and runs faster because he’s not allowed to drop out. The one still running eventually must kill the other to keep running. The best tragedies are those where the characters could have very easily done something to prevent the tragedy from happening or stop it as it unfolds – but because of who they are, and their inevitable choices because of who they are, it doesn’t make sense for them to do so. It makes sense that someone so morally compromised like Geto would snap at the realization that the deaths of his friends will keep happening. It makes sense that once the idea was planted in his head and he was shown the multitude of ways in which non-sorcerers were ignorant of the suffering sorcerers went through to protect them, he snapped at the sight of child sorcerers being relegated to a fate they didn’t deserve. It makes sense that Gojo would let Geto free out of love, even if it led to his demise anyway. It makes sense that he was so shocked at his friend’s actions and curse-user status, because he was buried in his own set of societal pressures and took his friend for granted. It all makes sense, and yet they’re all doomed. Every last person in JJK is doomed. Geto’s children died trying to free his corpse from the monster (man) that stole it. Both of Gojo’s children house(d) ancient sorcerers, and will both probably die fighting in bodies they cannot control. Yuji, the main character, is surrounded by the deaths of everyone he cares for, and the foreshadowing of his own inevitable end. Gojo is the Prince in his tower, is forced to watch, untouchable, trapped, as the knight on a dragon is shot down, plummets to the earth below - and becomes the enemy against his own will. Sometimes it makes me so sad I am close to tears. (and sometimes i read fics that make me cry more, because how in the hell are people that good at writing grief and angst and tragedy and where can I learn to do the same)

If the manga ends happily I’ll be surprised, because right now it seems a tragic but meaningful ending is in the works and I’m scared

[ilgattopatata]

so into the canon romances i'm starting to doubt this is a shounen