#I'll stop with my propaganda now I swear

[hyperfixation-symposium]

Saw an opportunity. Couldn't pass it up.

My YouTube recommended gave me this and it was just such Chayanne vibes

[calliesmemes]

IN-CHARACTER QUOTES FROM DISCORD

UNHINGED SENTENCE STARTERS FEATURING THINGS SAID BY MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS WHILE WRITING AS OUR MUSES IN A CRACK-BASED NONCANON GROUP CHAT. This post is dedicated to Em, Liz, Tanny, Nellie, Mel, Ange, and everyone else in the server who recognizes these quotes — you know who you are 😈

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Have you forgotten that you should not steal someone’s property? ”

“   I could slap that smug look off his face right now! ”

“   Your ears are a lie. ”

“   Woah woah that's - that's a bad word. ”

“   I don’t know if it’s allowed and quite frankly I don’t care. Fuck the rules. ”

“   Time for gremlin activities! ”

“   I hate this man. Let's prank him. ”

“   We are all going on strike today I swear ”

“   Looks like I need to invest in a kid leash. ”

“   DONT BE COWARDS!! JOIN THE STRIKE!! ”

“   I support her saying what needs to be said! I am done with the silencing of women!!!! ”

“   I like the dramatics. ”

“   I did not ask for a second opinion. ”

“   You seem to be doing a great job at being a nuisance. ”

“   NO BITING MY EMPLOYEES! ”

“   do you want me to bring you cheese? ”

“   Next move, start chewing on the door frames ”

“   I like crumbs. They are like a little midnight snack in my bed at night. ”

“   if he wants to be a worm, LET HIM BE A WORM ”

“   the rest of you suck my toe ”

“   To be fair I am simply vibing. ”

“   I am going to commit a war crime! ”

“   I am manifesting being happy. ”

“   Am I gonna talk shit WITH you guys? because im down to talk shit about pretty much anyone ”

“   Who says? We shall revolt without question. ”

“   Let's just start burning stuff. ”

“   Did you just call me... small? ”

“   Can I convert you with my kazoo propaganda? ”

“   We were radicalised by The Little Mermaid. ”

“   Penny in the swear jar, now. ”

“   My last words are, bros before hoes. ”

“   The old men are trying to be trendy. ”

“   I can do whatever I want too! ”

“   Can we go one day without an interruption from an American? ”

“   I am so sorry. He enjoys conflict. ”

“   Why is he so tall? ”

“   For legal reasons, kids, that's a joke. ”

“   Would you like to fight the adults? ”

“   You're not meant to bite people, it's frowned upon. ”

“   He’s a fun killer, don't listen to him! ”

“   Ow! Stop kicking me! ”

“   I have quite literally begged you not to kick, hit, or bite today. ”

“   BUT I thought we were buds, pals, amigos, chums, friends. ”

“   Oh shiiiii someone’s in trouble ”

“   How much caffeine have you had in the last hour? ”

“   I'll be honest they wouldn't be so bad if they didn't speak. ”

“   Is this goof meant to be dead or what? ”

“   I am a witch. ”

“   This one reeks of self confidence when he clearly doesn't think before opening his mouth. ”

“  I call bullshit on that rule! ”

“   The point is I have a cane and I’m not afraid to use it. ”

“   If you slap me, I’ll cane you. ”

“   Yippee for women. ”

“   FUCK THE PATRIARCHY ”

“   Sorry for being British. ”

“   Oi who's playing that ominous music? ”

“   I'm strong because I eat carrots. Oh wait or is that to see in the dark.... it's for something. ”

“   I will say sorry when i'm caught, don't you worry. ”

“   AND YOU CALLED ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE! ”

“   ... He's done for. Broken beyond repair. Someone play Taylor Swift. ”

“   Please refrain from punching one another. ”

“   He is becoming one with the spider I believe. ”

“   If anybody asks I will say I made you, then you will not get in trouble! ”

“   Can I be a girlboss too? I am not rude to women and I do what i like ”

“   Yippee for patriotism! ”

“   … i could make you guys rat costumes ”

“   Do you think if we started stealing bread we would lose our jobs? ”

“   why do British people ”

“   … you all need therapy. ”

“   Do you ever feel if you breathe the wrong way he will bite you? ”

“   I actively avoid whatever this is. ”

“   CARRY ME. ”

“   What if, and hear me out, they both promise not to do it again? ”

“   I wanna steal all his socks. ”

“   My socks were stolen! ”

“   Hey, watch it now. Only I'm allowed to insult me. ”

“   You couldn’t whisper to save your life. It’s pitiful. ”

“   Both of you are insufferable. ”

“   The law is overrated. ”

“   I’m afraid. Miss, you aren’t my type. ”

“   No. I swear on my life. I am being a gentleman ”

“   I support women’s wrongs. ”

“   ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE!!! ”

“   GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW ”

“   He bites? Are you .. joking? Please say you're joking. ”

“   If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain ifyou're not into yoga if you have half a brain if you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes on the cape then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape 🎶🎶 ”

[saudariel]

a haladriel brainrot playlist for all your haladriel brainrot needs. i swear there is a narrative thread going on here if you squint. legend has it that if you listen to this playlist in order then you too will be plagued by the Visions that haunt me 👁

alt/metal. 2hrs 40mins right now (to be continued). starts out chill and then gets heavier. there's screaming but nothing too wild. propaganda (lyrics that make me go absolutely apeshit) below the cut. not for every song because the playlist is too long, but there is still a lot so brace yourself lmao

listen on Spotify here ♥️

chokehold // sleep token

When we were made, it was no accident We were tangled up like branches in a flood I come as a blade, a sacred guardian So you keep me sharp and test my worth in blood You've got me in a chokehold

alkaline // sleep token

Every once in a while something changes And she's changing me It's too late for me now, I am altered There is something beneath She's not acid nor alkaline Caught between black and white Not quite either day or night She's perfectly misaligned I'm caught up in her design And how it connects to mine I see in a different light The objects of my desire

sun killer // spiritbox

I was born to break, shallow paradise Consumed, I ignore meteoric rise If the blade is dull, there is consequence You displace the host, there is no defense Tell me the waves won't rise And monsters will fade with time To temper the blaze with the twist of a knife A sun killer lullaby

mine // sleep token

We balance fire in the earth we walk Will never stop me reaching forth To see you again With colors over all the wasted years Eternity will bring you near I know you can see I know you can see That you will be mine

abysm // unprocessed

You showed me the world, our planet You talked to me when I was fragile You gave me back my will to focus I don't know anything, but to be with you Until we're gone to waste, I'll be there Dive into the world that we share When I hear your voice, I still know Everything is well until you're gone

everything starts and ends with you // in this moment

Nothing, nowhere, no one ever measures up No sun, no moon, no sky blinds me like you do No place, no storm, no oceans in between us Could keep me away from you Everything starts and ends with you The earth stood still, we burst alive The universe and stars align, as we collide

and the snakes start to sing // bring me the horizon

Don't say I'm better off dead 'Cause heaven's full and hell won't have me Won't you make some room in your bed Well, you could lock me up in your heart And throw away the key Won't you take me out of my head?

abandon // andromida feat. daedric

I conjure the phantom of another hollow you Then drag it to the bottom Pretending in a cycle I find sacred But I mean nothing to you Just a piece of the pattern in your ruse I spiral into chaos riptides

sanctify me // in this moment

Feel the wrath, your doom, these flames I know why you feel so empty like me Feel the force, the chaos, engage Don't you forget we are the same Go ahead, set me free Wash away this dirt in me I wanna feel more holy Take away this hurt in me Show me who I am inside your light Give me just what I need Baptize and sanctify me

antimatter // silent planet

We are broken bodies bound for each other In the impact we become antimatter The dust hasn't settled but we feel the decay Torn limb from limb I am swearing your name Our hands collide, we brace together In the impact we become antimatter

parasite // red handed denial

I know your name, so show me your face And I won't give in to your malevolence When the parasite inside my mind remains alive Left paralyzed and victimized, frozen in time Because I'm not your puppet, not your prey You won't take control of me again The parasite I'll exorcise This body's mine Cast it out, watch it die

collider // silent planet

Does it kill you to see me Under the same unfolding sky? Believe me, I have tried to search the stars for compromise But none of us are innocent, my scars are witnesses So feast your eyes and spring the trap I can still feel the daggers staring into my back Break me down to entropy Till you find the lie inside belief

hurt you // spiritbox

We are failing in crisis mode Mutually assured destruction Love the proxy and burn the bones So I smile in the snare of devotion I hope you find what you're fighting for I am happier when I hurt you Your medicine is the coldest war I am happier when I hurt you

blood // in this moment

apparition // sleep token

I hate you for the sacrifices you made for me I hate you for every time you ever bled for me I hate you for the way you smile when you look at me I hate you for never taking control of me I hate you for always saving me from myself I hate you for always choosing me and not someone else I hate you for always pulling me back from the edge I hate you for every kind word you ever said

So let's make trouble in the dream world Hijack heaven with another memory now I make the most of the turning tide It just split what's left of the burning silence Don't wait, 'cause this could be the last time You turn up in the reveries of my mind I wake up to a suicide frenzy Loaded dreams still leave me empty

coldharbour // daedric

Keep my soul in your possession I'm afraid to lose my faith If I hold on till the morning Would you claim it for me? If you kill my flesh tomorrow Then I’ll take my final breath It'll turn into a last laugh And I'll lay in a silent death

vore // sleep token

You have become the voice in my head Only recourse we're left after death Your viscera welcome me in, welcome me in My life is torn, my bones, they bleed My metaphors fall short in the end Your flesh and bone welcome me in, welcome me in Are you in pain like I am? Will we remain stuck in the throat of gods? Will the pain stop if we go deeper?

[dumbass-duo-showdown]

Propaganda masterpost for desertduo

They are two idiots thinking eachother's udeas are good and then somehow winning

They are two idiots thinking eachother's udeas are good and then somehow winning

They don’t have a single brain cell between them. They poked the goat to “see what would happen” and ended up getting their bases covered in duped ender dragon eggs.

Particularly in Hermitcraft, they are the most chaotic together. Chaotic in the most stupid of ways. Example: they blew up an intricate machine from one of the most "threatening" people on the server, stopped posting for a while, tried fixing it and failed, and tried apologizing with diamonds (Grian), theme park gifts (Scar), and by calling the victim "handsome" and "smart" and everything they could think of. And THEN, when Doc (the victim) retaliated with very intricate pranks that take a lot of skill and knowledge, they teamed up, went to the perimeter they were banned from as their alter egos as a loophole, and FILLED the ENTIRE PLACE (and it's a ginormous hole down to bedrock, many chunks wide) with CHICKENS. Just. A lot of chickens. Chickens everywhere. Oh my god. And another thing. Grian loves pressing buttons, like ADORES it (that's how the machine broke in the first place) and Scar... well. He gets confused easily and also breaks a lot of machines. So when people in the server build stuff, they have to both Grian-proof it (make sure an overexcited person who loves pressing buttons won't break the system) and Scar-safe it (make sure it's easily understandable and won't be broken like that). But now they also have to GRIAN-AND-SCAR-PROOF their stuff, because i swear, they multiply each other's dumbassery like by 100. And all that is just from the current arc of Hermitcraft season NINE. If we go back to season eight for a second, Grian decided to fake being AFK in all his friends' bases, and when he got to Scar's, Scar built him a ROLLERCOASTER RIDE to the BOAT TOTEM (boatem) HOLE THAT GOES BEYOND BEDROCK. People constantly fell there in the season and it was hell gearing themselves back up. But Scar was sure they were gonna land on the boatem and thought Grian was asleep because of time differences. But he failed and both died either way. And good fucking thing Grian was watching it all happen. Scar was SINGING him a SONG. You could even HEAR HIM COMING UP WITH IT BEFORE THE ACTUAL RIDE. Scar by FAR had the BEST reaction to the AFK experiment. And GODDD they're such idiots together. Unless they're in it for survival (aka the Life series) in which case Grian basically becomes his nanny let's be real. Scar is way too prone to die. He dies literally all the time and someone's gotta have him on a leash.

grian thinks that hes the responsible one in the dynamic but really hes just as much a chaos gremlin as scar is

they enable each other constantly. fellow builders to friends to enemies to friends to enemies to f

they share two braincells with each other and they do not work half the time. The number of things they fucked up is not even countable. One of them will be like "I'll save you!" and then both of them need someone to come and save them. They also are connected at the hip and love to annoy each other and other people so so much. they need help

They are so. so. Pesky british bird who loves explosions and has an attention span of 2 + catboy scammer who likes to lick magic and die badly. They are perfect for each other and their friendship is so precious to me. They are canonically soulmates. Currently theyre camping out on the edge of their enemy's giant hole because they accidentally exploded his machine together while Grian was procrastinating. The situation escalated because Grian likes war and Scar likes chaos so now theyre sitting directly in the path of their enemy's giant TNT-pooping goat mecha. Their plan? Build a buttercup-themed mecha to fight it because buttercups are poisonous to goats

They have caused a lot of chaos and destruction due to their lack of braincells /pos

Scar dragged Grian to the desert on a llama to monopolize on its sand, they blew up their friend’s tunnel bore, and rode a roller coaster together. They just bounce a braincell back and forth basically.

They ping pong a brian cell between each other and the few times it produces a thought the idea is always a bad one

they have two brain cells between them and they are not sure where they left them, they actively search for trouble and act sincerely shocked when it bites them on the ass, very orange cat coded if you ask me

Things only work out for them by pure luck. They both think they have the braincell and will be the one to pull each other through but they are both wrong. Tripping over their own feet and stumbling so hard and yet still coming out on top just because the others fall over harder

They get in a room together and its like all braincells disappear. They blew up their neighbors redstone, they filled his base with thousands of chickens, they die nonstop, they bully the other (in a friendly way) constantly and then do the exact same thing, theyre dunbasses ur honor

Theyre literally, just an echochamber of dumb. They actively lose braincells when around eachother. Grian seems smart and calculated but he can never get anything to work properly and scar is just an absolute hazard to himself and grian tries to keep him safe. They both die in minecraft so much. Grian also just has a habit of pressing every button lever or chest he ever sees. Even if its an obvious trap. He breaks stuff so easily. Grian WILL press the big button on top of the tnt block thats in plain sight. Especially right after scar says "i wonder what that does". Theyre duo can be summed up to trickster dumbass and dumbass with a heart of gold. They literally started a prank war by accidentally blowing up someones redstone. They are the unattended children on every server theyre in.

long live the science bros.

One owed the other a life debt for killing them with a creeper (it was just a prank, bro) and so they spent the season trying to monopolize all of the sand in a desert, and that's jusr scraping the surface of how stupid they are.

[comikadraws]

is the curse of hatred a nature or nurture case? I definitely don't think all of the uchiha are prone to this, nor are all of the ones who fall into this probably under the curse of rheirr own will

Red Links are my own posts, Blue Links are posts belonging to other users or external links. Please read them - they add a lot of context.

That depends on what you believe Kishimoto intended when he wrote chapter 619 as well as your personal headcanons. I'll start with what Kishimoto most likely intended and then explain my own headcanon on the matter.

If you remember my previous posts about the Curse of Hatred, Tobirama, and Kishimoto's Intent, you might remember that I believe that Kishimoto likely intended for the Curse of Hatred to be real in canon - rather than a racist propaganda piece. As you might also remember, this raises a lot of red flags for me.

But yeah, Kishimoto probably unironically pulled the "evil fantasy race" card and there is likely an element of nature involved.

But now, let's also remind ourselves that not every Uchiha falls victim to the Curse of Hatred. As explained in my post about the curse of hatred, there are Uchihas actively rejecting any clinging to hatred. Furthermore, Obito frames it as a "nindo" which is a choice (or well, as much as it could possibly be a choice if you are influenced by the people around you) and could potentially be informed by the individual's culture. So that does also imply a nurture component.

But since Uchihas are capable of breaking free from the curse (and Uchihas who don't have strong ties to their clan), it stands to reason that the nurture component is stronger than the nature one.

Now, back to my own headcanon. Also in my post about Kishimoto's intent, I talked about "authorial intent" and how it shouldn't stop us from forming our own headcanons, as long as we retain awareness about the authorial intent (you know, to prevent making up lies and stuff).

My personal preferred headcanon in this is the idea that Zetsu intentionally messed with the Uchiha Clan's history as this is heavily supported by chapter 681 as well as Hagoromo's personal perception which places the reincarnation cycle at the centre of Madara's hatred.

In my post on the Curse of Hatred, I illustrated that the prejudice targeting Uchihas might have emerged thanks to Zetsu repeatedly driving Indra's reincarnates to war against Ashura reincarnates. After Konoha was founded, that prejudice developed into fear (thanks to Zetsu manipulating Madara, who manipulated Obito, who released the Kyubi) and set off a chain reaction of events. That fear caused the Uchiha clan to be targets of Konoha's leaders until they ended up killed, eventually leading to Sasuke swearing vengeance against the Leaf.

In my preferred interpretation, it is neither nature nor nurture but simply the target painted on the backs of Uchihas which took its origin in Zetsu.

[siriannatan]

Thunderous Confessions - fWhipSausage

I felt an urge to give fWhip my borderline fear of strong rain and thunderstorms and after short thought decided to make it into WitherHusbands propaganda..

And now I have an urge to write dragonSausagePix fic...

fWhip's luck has ran out. Why must it rain on the day he had to host stupid Emperors Meeting? And why did it have to change into a storm when Sausage was the only one still in his mansion aside from himself due to their trade talks taking forever?

And why, in Blood Sheep's sake did the thunder have to be so loud? And rain so strong as it hit the rattling in wind, tightly shut window shutters? And why can he not control himself from shaking every time the dumb thunder roared?

Sausage of course was fine. The half-dragon was always damn perfect. At least, even if he did notice, he didn't comment on how skittish fWhip got. "You okay?" Maybe he did notice...

"Yes," fWhip said too quickly. Internally wincing at how tense he sounded. "The damn weather is making my knee hurt," he forced himself to smile, squeezing his cane as another thunder roared outside. "Perfect... Ahhh," he was about to carry on with excuses when one of the shutters flew open with loud snap of the lock.

He didn't notice when he curled up under the table, hands over his head, until Sausage gently pulled him out. "Are you sure you're okay?" He asked but fWhip could only stare at his personal hell raging outside, lit up only by thunder. Shaking in Sausage's strong arms. "Let's get you somewhere without broken shutters," the half-dragon hummed almost affectionately. Like he was worried for fWhip as an important person and not just a good ally and leader of the WRA.

For some bizarre reason Sausage carried the shaking human and his cane to his bedroom. How did he know where it was? Was it even his intended destination or just the first room he decided was for enough from the small meeting room they were in earlier.

At least the shutters here were sturdier than anywhere else and fWhip could bury himself and his remaining dignity in a pile of blankets. Well, he would if Sausage took his perfect and handsome self somewhere else. Which he did not. Instead he helped fwhip out his scarf, gently put his crown off and rested it on his dresser. He even helped him out his shoes and vest. "You should be more comfortable now," the knight-king grinned, showing off his sharp teeth. "Feeling better," he asked as he looked around for something.

"I'll be fine..." fWhip stared but froze as another thunder roared, seemingly closer. "You can go and be handsome somewhere else..." He grumbled, not really meaning to say it out loud. He was so busy burying himself in blankets and shaking he missed the way Sausage froze.

"You meant it? When you called me handsome?" fWhip would jump out his bed as someone settled behind him. But Sausage's arm gently wrapped around his waist stopped it. "I'm not mad just... You always look like you're angry at me so it was a bit of a surprise..." Sausage sighed, and fWhip could swear his face was in his hair. His damn, always messy hair.

"I... I did mean it..." fWhip admitted quietly. "And I'm never angry, just... Frustrated I guess. At how perfect you are all the time and stuff..." He rambled, shutting up as Sausage's hold on him tightened slightly. "You can go to your room I'll be okay..." He sighed, ready for their relationship to shift to pure business from this half friendship they had going on so far.

Sausage did not leave. He just lay there, all warm and handsome and relaxing. One wing covering them in sort of half coccoon. "I love you fWhip..." He confessed as if it wasn't worse tha the hell outside the mansion. "I've had for a very long time... You're amazing and... I might always try my best to impress you..." He carries on talking, making fWhip feel more and more like jumping out the window.

His dumb feelings were returned? He had some microscopic change at wooing the man of his too many dreams? No way... "You're not joking to distract me?" fWhip could feel his heart beating at at least twice it's normal rate. "Because I'll never forgive you if you do," he huffed as he awkwardly turned around to face Sausage. Yup. Still stupidly handsome. "I'll never forgive you if you break my heart..." He did his best to glare with how shaken he was by everything.

"I would literally fight this storm for you," Sausage said with far too determined of an expression.

"Please don't... And I love you too, you idiot..." fWhip sighed and hid his face in his chest. It just felt appropriate at the moment, as he clung to the half dragon as close as possible until they both fell asleep.

Only waking up when worried Gem and Pearl barged in since no one knew where Sausage is, least of all his court. "Let the man sleep," Sausage yawned stretching and showing off that at some point his shirt vanished as fWhip burned with embarrassment. Not a way he wanted Gem to find out about his new relationship.

[web-novel-polls]

Priest (Author) Character Tournament

⚠️ Submissions CLOSED ⚠️

Link to Masterpost

Rules

One character per submission. If you want to submit multiple characters, please do so in separate forms.

Only the character and the novel they’re from is required, but propaganda is highly encouraged

Please submit the English and/or most common way to refer to the novel. If you want to submit a novel without an English translation, please describe it AND the character. The description is not required but HIGHLY encouraged since this tournament is being run in English.

If you’re not sure which novels were written by Priest or are interested in her other novels, here’s a link to a helpful carrd.

Tag: #priest character tournament

Current Submissions below the cut

(CW: spoilers, misgendering as a joke, death/murder, cannibalism, swearing, suggestive language, physical abuse)

[Last Updated: Match 11th, 2024]

Submissions (15/15) 

Chang An from Bestial Blade / Shou Cong Zhi Dao

Submission:

Just a little guy with a big fuck-off saber. Was sickly from childhood (later in the book it's discovered to be a heart condition), but did not let that stop him from studying the blade. Sleeps a lot when he is not fighting. Beat his boyfriend with a stick that one time (was absolutely in the right).

Image Link (from cover of thai edition)

Cheng Qian from Liu Yao

"Now, in Cheng Qian's eyes, there were only two kinds of people in this world: people who are no match for him now, and people who will be no match for him in the future."  - Liu Yao: The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect, Chapter 38

No propaganda submitted

Sassy child who cares about his found family/sect SO much

The “meanie” from the description - “A cultivation story about how a declining sect is restored by a narcissist, troublemaker, meanie, idiot, and wimpy kid.”

“No matter how many foes, they cannot bend my will.”  - Cheng Qian, ch.29 

"He believed that when he was alone, he could do anything all by himself. For a lone person, when he reaches the peak of his achievement, he's still alone; when he falls to the depths of the abyss, too, he's still alone. Even if his head were to fall from his shoulders, wouldn't that just be a scar on his body? What was there to fear?" - Ch. 36

Chu Huan from Of Mountains and Rivers / Shan He Biao Li

Submission:

His vibes are insane. A character pipi made by putting Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu in a jar and shaking, and then wrapping the result in the most unassuming shell possible. That one post that went like "perfectly normal man that has something seriously wrong with him" might as well have been made about him. Kills like 20 ppl in his introduction scene, falls off a cliff, gets on a bus, and agrees to become a teacher for those random guys he met because one of them is hot. Speaking of, his bi awakening and accepting it happens in a span of like, one second. *Sees a hot guy* welp, homosexual attraction is not a sin! Also, somehow has perfect tumblr shitposter vibes. Was asked what's a word for "good brother" in his language and after careful consideration said "bitch". Did I mention he's insane? "Play me a tune, and I'll go along with your BDSM play." Or that time he woke up after being clinically dead for a bit (saw his deceased loved ones asking him to go into the light and all) and to his bf's frantic questioning of "Does it hurt?" immediately went "Yes. It hurts a lot. You have to kiss it better." like bestie your priorities.... Anyway yeah what a guy.

Image Link 

Feng Xiaoshu / Princess Jing’an from Lord Seventh

Submission:

Badass lady who leads troops and can split a person's head in half with her spear <3 

Han Muchun from Liu Yao 

"Only I, your master, would not detest you, my dirty girl. If it were your first senior brother here, he would have stewed you."  - Han Muchun to Shuikeng, Liu Yao: The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect, Chapter 29

[No propaganda submitted]

Took some disciples for his declining sect and unexpectedly became a father

Han Yuan from Liu Yao

“Unlike us that had a vagrant life, domesticated kids are shy; I have to look after him in future.”  - Han Yuan about Cheng Qian

Submission: 

Cringefail loser(most affectionate) dragon boi. Gone edgy but his family loves him anyway.

Image Link 

“our fav -1 braincell kiddo”

The “idiot” from the description - “A cultivation story about how a declining sect is restored by a narcissist, troublemaker, meanie, idiot, and wimpy kid.”

Huang Jinchen from Itinerant Doctor / You Yi 

Submission:

His style has captivated me... Emotionless sniper who is considered more weapon than person on the clock; busks on the subway in his free time. Part of a clown4clown couple. Killed a human being for the first time at the age of 8. Apparently gives mind-blowingly good massages. Also had 'The Little Match Girl' fairy tale metaphor in the book which uh hurted me.

Jing Beiyuan from Lord Seventh

Submission:

Honestly what a guy. He was dealt such a bad hand and yet he stays Chillin’… by which I mean sacrificing both his own morals and his physical safety to put a guy that he’s fundamentally ‘meh’ about at this point on the throne because everyone else is so much worse. He wants to be a dad so so badly it’s heartbreaking (until it isn’t!). He has Old Man Vibes™️ because he remembers three centuries worth of past lives and it makes him deeply weird but he’s still the prettiest boy anyone has ever seen. He was a jasmine plant for a while. 10/10 best at taking naps and pretending to be a loser. Go king give us nothing <3

Li Yun from Liu Yao

[No propaganda submitted]

The “troublemaker” from the description - “A cultivation story about how a declining sect is restored by a narcissist, troublemaker, meanie, idiot, and wimpy kid.”

Made “water that bathed toads’ feet” (Golden Toad Liquid)

A weird animal/bug kid, which I respect SO much 

“Resident mad scientist and frog enthusiast… an annoyance (affectionate)”

Mu Xiaoqiao from Bandits / You Fei / Legend of Fei

Submission: 

"People tended to apply the highest of standards when judging the behavior of revered saints like the Sword of Mountains and Rivers: if they made even the smallest of missteps, they would be deemed unworthy of their sterling reputations, and be lambasted for hypocrisy. But people were much more magnanimous towards Mu Xiaoqiao and those of his vile ilk, for as long as these fiends didn’t go around killing everyone in sight…or as long as this violence was directed at others instead, they could sometimes even find something perversely charming about these villains." (Bandits, book 3, chapter 13)  Callout for who? Callout for me. Pipi is very right about this but also she is the one writing her murderous gays so epic and sexy and fascinating and irresistible and…

Tong Ru / Lord Beiming from Liu Yao 

“Beiming? Who deserves the title of Beiming? That’s merely an arrogant title given by some short-sighted people.” - Lord Beiming, Liu Yao: The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect, Chapter 16

[No propaganda submitted]

“It’s just death, nothing serious.” - Lord Beiming, ch.30 

***I, the poll runner, have not gotten to the Lord Beiming reveal, so I’m not 100% sure the quotes from where I’m at are correct/for the same person (since there’s another person trying to claim the title of Lord Beiming)

(Also, Tong Ru and Han Muchun are sharing a picture because it’s way too blurry with just one lol)

Wen Kexing from Faraway Wanderers

Submission:

Character of all time (to me). Cannibal. Malewife. Flaming homosexual. Strongest mfer in jianghu after literal immortal. Surprisingly realistic portrayal of c-ptsd and dissociative disorder considering all of the above. Half of the couple that rewired my brain chemistry and gave me unrealistic expectations for romance -_- 

Image Link

Wu Xi from Lord Seventh / Qi Ye 

Submission: 

My beloved snake boy!! He goes as a hostage to a foreign land at eleven years old in order to maintain uneasy peace between his country and the empire that colonized them (and on that note, his initial language struggle was so good), then he manages to help keep his love interest safe from thousands of kilometers away via peerless potions skills, then he goes and *wins his nation's freedom* via martial might and court negotiations, and then he heals his man and gets him home. Like bulletpoint by bulletpoint I think he might have actually managed to accomplish the most out of the cast by the end. (Qi Ye is a palace intrigue novel btw, so it's amazing that the one character who had zero patience with palace intrigue was the one who accomplished so much lmao.) And all this while being a 20-something borderline-yandere ML obsessed with his first love. What a man. What a legend. Not to mention his epic healer skills were the reason Zhou Zishu survives Faraway Wanderers. Wenzhou get their happy ending because of him! Also, he hand-raised the most lovable animal sidekick of all time (sable!!!!!) before said sable defected to his husband. Vote for Wu Xi to make sable happy.

Image Link

Xi Ping from Tai Sui

Submission: 

He is literally everything to me. Pure chaos condensed into a single person. Everyone loves him, everyone hates him. He does his best, he doesn't try at all, he beats up monsters with a qin, he brought about the destruction of the entire cultivation world…

Yan Zhengming from Liu Yao 

"I've grown into this age, but other than this face that my parents had birthed me with, there is nothing on my person that holds any sort of value. What right do I have to change the thousand-year tradition of our sect? In any case, even if the sect tradition makes no sense whatsoever, it's still something left behind by our master."  - Yan Zhengming, The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect, Chapter 38 

[No propaganda submitted]

The “Narcissist” from the description - “A cultivation story about how a declining sect is restored by a narcissist, troublemaker, meanie, idiot, and wimpy kid.”

THE prettiest princess; he’s literally referred to as Niangniang (a term for an imperial concubine) at least once

He is such a materialist who is even described as caring more about money than life, but "When he thought of Cheng Qian, he suddenly felt like there was nothing else that he desired in this life" (Ch.56). 

Dealers’s Choice

Han Tan/Shuikeng/Puddle from Liu Yao

"Puddle had one merit, and that was that she knew how to act when it came to her own benefit."  - Liu Yao: The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect, Chapter 31

Little birb shimei lol

Is literally the daughter of the Yao Queen and a mortal who the others just. adopted. 

The “wimpy kid” of the description - “A cultivation story about how a declining sect is restored by a narcissist, troublemaker, meanie, idiot, and wimpy kid.”

Sheng Lingyuan from Lie Huo Jiao Chou / Drowning Sorrows in Raging Fire

[No propaganda prepared]

Xuan Ji from Lie Huo Jiao Chou / Drowning Sorrows in Raging Fire

[No propaganda prepared]

[jade-of-mourning]

hey! it’s your hopefully favorite anon again. genuinely thank you so much for responding to my asks and stuff. it’s so eloquently written and it feels like it’s actually mako’s grief in text form. that doesn’t really make sense but. reading that little cat blurb actually made me feel better. I cried. like. heavily. 😭

im glad you liked my goofy insane mentor-that-needs-a-mentor korra idea, even if you’re not going to use it. I actually had the thought while watching a video comparing korra and zuko. it’s not exactly a niche thought that ‘korra is aang’s successor and Zuko’s spiritual successor’ but then it struck me. zuko was the oldest member of the gaang (just a bit older than sokka, the former eldest) but he is still absolutely batshit reckless and insane so,,, what if i Korra’d it.

also,, triple threats,,, since I’ve already revealed that I like to fuck around with canon in every possible aspect. consider: au where bolin dies (this one came to me after seeing a video saying mako would probably… yk, himself, if Bo died) but instead of giving up or chasing whatever criminals got him/dedicating his life to helping other orphans/etc. he just. replaces zolt. and maybe he would have a zuko style redemption arc?? I’ve been listening to Brutus by The Buttress on loop too which has not been helping me escape. yk what would make the takeover even better? zolt has bolin killed to try and get a more firm grip on his chosen protégé (maybe even around the end of the events of republic city hustle) and mako finds out and just,,, absolutely bodies him. like some scraggly 15 y/o just fucking cold blood murders a crime syndicate boss and takes over and?? everyone’s like well ig he was bound to get there eventually. and there would be attempted takeovers obviously but this little fucker is like. nuh uh. you can have this as soon as I get bro back (never)

sorry I’ll stop going insane now. I think you should really listen to Brutus btw it is SO fire

-🐌

hi snailon! (i'm going to call you that. snail + anon mashed together!) you're my only anon so you're my favorite by default,,, but you'd be my favorite even if you weren't! and it's lovely to hear that my writing has helped you <33 also sorry this took a day to respond to whoops

(cont)

okay on the mentor!korra part — it is such a big brain idea that i might have to one day write an au on my au just for that alone LOL okay but korra is so zuko the same way mako is so katara!!! one day i'll talk about it i swear. the classic comparison of mako = zuko is just so Off and it bugs me haha it's really korra and it always has been. bryke is out there spreading false propaganda about their own show like wtf man

second, on the triple threats! see i was reading this and i was reminded of deerstalkerdeathfrisbee's the only thing we've ever organized is crime! (which is a BRILLIANT fic even if i don't really like wuko), except then your train of thought veered divergent so promptly that i was like. woah. woahhhh. i've always been partial for terrifying mobster boss!mako since reading this one a few years back and i wholeheartedly believe that if it weren't for bolin, mako could have very quickly devolved down a really bad path. i've seen it float around a lot of older posts, but to sum it up most succintly, mako made sure bolin survived and bolin made sure mako lived. and if bolin is gone? mako would not give two shits about trying to be a better person, and if bolin's death was of a tangible human person's doing… well. it would not end well for that person, let's say. that person being zolt would abolutely lead to mako promptly desecrating the man, and even if it wasn't a grab for power, i can totally see it proceeding to him actually becoming the teenage mob boss of the triple threats.

(ALSO STOP "this little fucker is like. nuh uh. you can have this as soon as I get bro back (never)" WHY ARE YOU SO FUNNY this is so sad i'm laughing so hard)

but really; mako is just such a guy of asinine stubborness to survive, with the single-minded goal to protect bolin. if there's no one left to protect, and if bolin didn't just succumb to the horrors of their circumstance but was rather brutally murdered as an attempt to control mako himself, that asinine stubborness to survive could very easily translate into cold-blooded violence, and would come with an unnerving facade of quiet apathy while he's really simmering on the edge of a really bad breakdown at any given moment. the guilt would also be endless, and mako would probably project the personal villain so hard on every single member of the triple threats in his general vicinity. working under this angry/guilty/repressed/violent teenager would actually be the most terrifying thing ever.

continuing your ask from last time because i realized i never addresssed this part —

I just had another brain worm sorry. so remember how I was talking about korra potentially being a guiding adult-ish figure in the avatar mako au. what if baby bending brothers. and either lin/tenzin/whoever or them and the other 2 krew members,, taking care of little gang monster and his brother,, and addressing some of the insane trauma and helping him heal and build a stable life,,,

i do love child acquisition, but for tiny feral children! mako and bolin really could've been the most unhinged trauma children of all time and i don't think that any adult on the show would actually be able to handle them as they were except probably pema. tenzin would try his best but i think that he would very easily get overwhelmed and a certain phase of mako would probably incessantly insult him with the deliberate intention to rile him up — and admittedly, tenzin has more of a temper than he'd like to admit, so i just think they'd be at odds a lot to an almost dangerous amount. (but ig i'm exploring that in the actual fic lol) i think mako as a kid would be considerably more abrasive than his is now and far more distrusting and paranoid, to an extent that i don't think that there are a lot of adults in lok that would be well equipped to handle that. (maybe kya? i could see both of them taking to kya actually. that would be funny. maybe i'll write kya into this au.) i do think that bolin could easily get all of them wrapped around his finger, lin grudgingly (and i think she'd be the sort to hold a reluctant affection for prickly loser boy mako).

also idk how i missed it initially but throwing teenaged korrasami into the mix makes it funny though. they would manage the pair of them so badly. (i'm sorry it is cute but i personally don't believe in babysitter!korra and definitely not babysitter!asami.) korra would be in a physical brawling session with mako the little punk ass bitch if asami looks away for one minute because bolin will not stop crying and mako is now trying to bite her head off because that's his little brother. bolin just thinks these two cool older girls are super neat and not at all demanding of his respect so he just incessantly says the most batshit insane things at them while mako is just like. hmm wealthy girl. i am full of anger at life i think i will project that onto you because to me you represent everything i hate about society, i've decided. meanwhile asami is just so confused because she's literally just being her sweet self and this random mobster street kid pema found won't stop giving her a look like he wants to fillet her

sorry none of this post makes any sense at all my head is OVERFLOWING i am UNHINGED thank you for enabling me once again <333 you'll never be a bother also yes i will go listen!

[magical-boy-bracket]

Not trying to be mean, but looking at the current standings for the matches I did propaganda for... It's not looking too good for the Saber boys even though their opponents don't really have magical boy vibes (To me and probably a few others at least.) Do they want to see me cry? I'm not sure if I can do propaganda for the other boys to the same extent at these guys. (Except maybe Cure Wing.) I'm not accusing anyone, I'm just... kind of heartbroken about the current outcome. 😢

I am uh... Not sure how to respond to this? If the possible outcome is genuinely making you upset I would suggest taking a step back and relax and remember it's just a silly Tumblr tournament meant to be for fun. It's nothing too serious. And hey, the polls aren't over yet. There is still a chance to turn things around. Kijino managed to win against a *Twisted Wonderland* character on the first round, after all.

And on "their opponents don't really have magical boy vibes (To me and probably a few others at least.)"... I'll only touch on this because I *have* seen other people's tags on my posts on this subject. (So please don't see any of this as something I am saying at you specifically, asker. But more as a general explanation to *everyone*.)

Some of the boys who are here are definitely grey areas and some are definitely pretty big stretches. However, I am of the stance that this stuff is pretty subjective. Some people don't think toku heroes are Magical Boys at all, so that is already a more restrictive criteria I don't agree with. I'm not gonna go into details of why I allowed specific characters because 1) I'd be here all day and 2) knowing how the internet is, someone IS gonna take this way too seriously and use it as an excuse to be an asshole. So I'd rather not get into that. Plus, complaining about it isn't gonna do anything. I'm not gonna disqualify characters now that the tournament has already started.

(Actually, I'll go on and say: if anyone is *genuinely* bothered by my criteria being too loose, then you are more than welcome to start your own tournament with as strict rules as you want. I swear it's not that serious. Don't let me "beating you to it" stop you. I'll still reblog your post if you tag me in it.)

(And please remember this is just a silly Tumblr tournament made for FUN. I am not forcing anyone to participate, nor should your mood depend on which fictional guy with magical powers wins or loses.)

[raine-dance]

PROPAGANDA REPOST ON ROUND 2!!! BUT WITH MORE INFO!!! Like, a lot more.

I've never cared *too* much for Prince Ali Reprise. It's good for what it does, it takes the Prince Ali theme and turns it on its head, but it's still *Prince Ali.* It's not Aladdin and it will never be a theme personal to Aladdin. It serves to destroy Aladdin's farce, Aladdin's lie, but ignores Aladdin's truth from a musical perspective in Street Rat.

Now let's talk about Good Kid. Good Kid, just like My Grand Plan and Tree on the Hill, is *raw.* It's Percy's raw emotion, his suffering so far - all he gets are bad grades and a bum rap and a bad rep and a good smack, and no friends, and no home, and *no mom.* It shows his vulnerability in the moment - he never stole anything, he never meant to hurt anyone, he swears, he swears that he's a *good kid,* a *good kid,* who's had a bad run. It serves to set up his arc from now on - he needs one last chance to prove he's good enough for someone. There's a reason the song is a favourite.

So why mention both of these songs? Well, because Last Day of Summer does what Prince Ali *could have.* Luke takes the theme most personal, most emotional to Percy, and flips it on its head. He's the villain to Percy, the narrative foil, of course it would be him. They both resent their fathers for abandoning them - but while Percy is determined to save the one parent that was always there, *Luke* is hellbent on getting revenge on the one who wasn't.

"So I'll do anything! I don't care if I hurt anyone! It doesn't pay to be a good kid, a good kid, a good son!"

This lyric legitimately fucked me up when I first listened to the musical. I have never been the same since. This is my favourite villain song of all time because of it. Do I think it has a Pirithous' chance in the Underworld in this bracket? No, but this is my ride or die and I'm standing by it!

Now, new stuff: Good Kid wasn't on the original tour of the Lightning Thief musical. It was a new addition to the 2017 revival along with other such bangers as My Grand Plan and Another Terrible Day. TLDoS got a revamp to match - as discussed in round 1, this was done to emphasise Luke as a reflection of Percy, and serves as good payoff to Luke's prior comments - in Their Sign, Luke states that nobody could blame Percy for holding a grudge against the gods if his dad doesn't claim him - as Luke is friends with many of the demigods who were never claimed, given that the Hermes cabin is that of the unclaimed as well, he certainly holds a grudge. The gods either haven't claimed their children, or are unable to, because the gods already represented by camp feel them to be unimportant.

There's also the fact that Percy eventually acknowledges that his dad may be a screw-up, but that he's still his dad. In the end, Poseidon still saved him, and gave him what he needed to eventually save his mother. Hermes did not do that. Luke's mother died because of her involvement with Hermes and because of the fate she knew Luke would eventually meet, and Hermes did nothing to stop it, or to save or console Luke. Percy and Luke reflect on their first meetings with their dads very differently - "Maybe my dad was a screw-up too," "maybe he did the best that he could do," "maybe he never knew how to care, but hey, that's life, and life ain't fair." "I'm the Son of Poseidon, though I never wanted to be." Luke, adversely, has no reason to, and therefore does not, forgive his father; "I met the guy once, and once was enough."

Percy got a seashell that helped him end a war and save his mom. Luke got pairs of winged shoes... after his quest was finished, and far too late to save anyone. All of the events leading up to the musical, and what Poseidon is willing to do during it compared to what Hermes was not, lead up to this confrontation - Percy and Luke are two sides of the same coin, but only Percy has reason to be optimistic. You can't even blame Luke for wanting the gods dead for ruining everything he had.

A lot of this may only really be appreciated by the book-readers, given that a lot of what the books are could really only be covered by a few scattered lyrics. But, hey, I'm a book-reader! Lemme tell you the best thing about Luke's reprise of Good Kid in the context of "we have to summarise the lore of the books as best we can in a two-hour musical."

"So I'll do anything, I don't care if I hurt anyone."

This... is ultimately true of Luke. As we learn in Tree on the Hill, Grover escorted Thalia, Luke and Annabeth to camp, but Thalia had to stay behind to fight off a monster. Grover and Annabeth still blame themselves for this incident - Grover's character song is all about it.

I'ma be real, Luke doesn't fuckin' give a shit.

Like, okay, kind of. But not really.

He's the one to poison Thalia's tree in the second book to further his own goals. He's the one willing to make her sacrifice meaningless, to further his own goals by removing the only defense the camp had against monsters. And he's the reason the monster came after them in the first place.

I forgot about that fact until I recently re-read the books! But Thalia has very strong opinions about this boy! Which are that he, despite not blaming himself, at least certainly not to the extent of Annabeth and Grover, is fully at fault for what happened. He would constantly draw attention and pick fights that he really didn't fucking need to.

He was willing to do anything.

He hurt someone.

He was too far-gone as soon as his mom died, and this song really does a good job of telling us this as subtly as possible.

But holy shit.

It does that.

Vote The Last Day of Summer.

Villain Song Showdown Bracket F Round 2

We Both Reached for the Gun (Chicago) - Villain: Billy Flynn

The Last Day of Summer (The Lightning Thief) - Villain: Luke Castellan

Mod comment: Since the new Percy Jackson series came out, I've been getting Luke Castellan fanfics on my dash

[whatdoyoumeanitsnotcanon]

(I'm back with a second helping of Guilliman soup)

Terra was beautiful at night.

It was the curse of a historitor, you supposed, to know so many heartbreaking truths. The first time you saw a painting of the ancient oceans of Terra, long lost, you cried. There was so much the people of the Imperium didn't know, and perhaps never would. Maybe it was for the best, to never miss what you didn't know you had.

Either way, it was all in the past now. You weren't a historitor anymore.

And you were getting married tomorrow.

You glanced back at your regalia. It was a magnificent ensemble, gold and white, grand in the style of the old Imperium, but soft, warm. You hadn't had much of a say in what you were wearing. Or any of the planning, for the matter.

The more you reflected, the more you wondered how much of a say you really had in the whole affair at all. It might have been different, had you been marrying a normal man. But you weren't.

Throne, you were going to marry Roboute Guilliman.

A few months after the fateful confrontation in his office, the two of you had been sitting in his personal chambers, conversing late into the night over a bottle of wine, as had become your routine.

The courtship had been awkward, at first. It still was, in many ways. Despite your education, you were basically a backwater bumpkin who had stumbled into the right credentials and experience, and he was... A demigod. The age difference, too, haunted you a bit. But neither dissuaded him. He continued to visit you, to ask you to visit him, when there was time. You moved, slowly, from separate chairs to sharing the ottoman to leaning against each other. He was warm.

The bottle was nearing empty, and there was a pleasant buzz around your senses. You leaned against Guilliman's arm (though you called him Roboute, sometimes, intimately, Rob in private now.) And he stroked your shoulder, pulling you closer. He spoke into your ear.

"Marry me."

"No preamble? Should I be offended?" You chuckled and looked up at him. He wasnt laughing. You sat up. "Rob, oh, you... You weren't... You weren't joking, were you?"

"No. I am not."

"It's early. It's only been a few months, I don't think... Are you sure?"

"I've never been more certain of anything in my life."

You let out a long breath. "I'm... Can we even do that?"

"Of course we can." He added, more quietly. "I made sure if it."

You stopped, suddenly finding a fascinating pattern on the rug.

Roboute knelt in front of you. "I swear to you, not an ounce of harm will come to you as long as I draw breath. I will bring you stars in a gift box if you ask it. I'll lay worlds at your feet. Let me show you. All I ask is that you stand beside me. Think about it tonight, and give me your answer tomorrow evening." His eyes were alight, it took all your courage not to shrink. He leaned forward and kissed your forehead, then left.

You didn't sleep that night.

When you told him yes the next day, the chamber bathed in the amber light of the Terran sunset, he swept you into into his arms and spun you around, the both of you laughing.

And now you were getting married, in possibly the biggest hoopla Terra had seen in centuries.

Roboute wanted a small ceremony, but the Administratum would hear none of it. After all, what better story to sell the people of the Imperium than a royal wedding? It made a nice reprieve from the military parades, at least, though your wedding festivities would involve enough marching retinues that it might as well be one anyway. In the week leading up to the wedding alone, you had attended so many events you were certain your face was burned into holo-vid players across the galaxy. You had quickly become a symbol to the people of the Imperium, the normal citizen granted such an extraordinary honor, to wed a Primarch. It was like a fairy tale. You were becoming an excellent propaganda piece, despite Roboute's efforts to keep you out of the public eye as much as possible.

You tried not to think about how many people would be watching you get married. At least Roboute would be there. You were sleeping separately until tomorrow, of course. The prospect of tomorrow night had you blushing with excitement and shaking with dread all at once. You tried not to think about it.

You climbed into bed, sleep slowly coming to claim you. Tomorrow your life would end and start again.

You could only hope you made the right choice.

A wing over, Guilliman stared into his fireplace. Haunted by thoughts of you, and tomorrow, and tomorrow night. He was beyond pleased that you had accepted, he had worried when you hesitated he would be forced to use... Coercion. But there was no need, and your blooming relationship continues unimpeded. He just had to keep you close.

He relaxed on his massive bed, preparing to sleep. Despite his size, he couldn't fill it. Soon, it would never be lonely again.

(once again, no proof reading because that's work. I just shit this into your asks lol sorry)

[zodiacs-web]

Hii, I don't know if this is dumb but could I request Qin Shi Huang with a girl who is like his political opponent / tries to fight him and loses? But him not killing her cause he thinks she's cute?

I really love your posts💕

Enemy of Mine

Qin Shi Huang x F!Reader

Synopsis: Reader is Qin's political opponent yet only embarrasses herself and yearns for death but Qin has other plans.

What's in the web: Slight angst, just one swear word, a strange ending

It was strange, he doesn't recall the last time someone fought him like this. Out of the blue, you called for a battle with him. Of course, he accepted. Why wouldn't he fight the person he's been politically fighting against for the past months? You were a cute little nuisance to him, yet that declaration finally made him want to shut you up.

Boldly thinking you were a mere child with your words. A joke spewing out of your mouth every time you spoke, standing out in the street with your servants, yelling out your propaganda in retaliation to Qin's rule. Of course, Qin found this amusing, a princess running her mouth. Hearing the downfall of previous leaders, you tried your hardest to gain traction yet were taken out by Qin himself.

You did gain a following but, it was to a group of old men seeing you as entertainment. Laughing and laughing as you now spoke to deaf ears. Your royal lineage was down the drain and your speeches drove it lower. Truly a time to be alive.

Not a single person cared about the words you said. Even that meeting Qin held with other rulers, that even yourself was invited to, simply took you as a joke. Qin found you cute every time you spoke. This was true entertainment, he thought. Who would care when all you've been saying was simply lies.

At this point, you didn't mind going out in any way possible. Maybe that's why you wanted to go out like this, by the hands of the emperor himself. Maybe, that's why you're in a private training ground. Only you and him, standing across one another, gripping the sword, your stance tense after trading the first few blows with the man. Eventually, leading to more serious ones.

Finally falling to your knees, heavy pants left your mouth as the emperor walked closer to your figure.

"To be honest, I never expected such a thing from you." He squatted down to your level and continued speaking. "I thought you were going to finally stop your nonsense, so when you came to me with this. Ha! I couldn't believe it."

"After all that embarrassment I put myself through just to stop you," You managed to sit back and look at him. "I might as well die like this."

Qin frowned, very displeased by your statement.

"That is no way to live your life, (Y/n)." He smiled while you were confused. "Why don't you try to live a different life?"

You shook your head. "I scarred my lineage with this bullshit. There's no helping it despite killing it."

"I see." He placed his hand on his chin and stayed silent for a while.

"Oi! Aren't you going to kill me?!" You screamed towards him, expecting him to finally kill you.

"I've decided!" He stood up fast, excitement present like a child. "I'll help you live a new life and restore your family name!!"

You looked at him like he was psychotic. "Are you serious...?" You crawled back, scared he's going to use you. "Why-why are you deciding this now?"

"I think you're cute!" He answered, still smiling.

"HUH?!! Are you stupid?! Just kill me already!"

He started walking away, leaving you on the ground. "I'll get some people to help with those cuts then we can discuss later."

"Wait!! Come back and kill me! Come back and kill me, you weirdo!!"

He chuckled as he left the grounds, still thinking how cute you are like this.

[fanmoose12]

a little something for @bruciesnat :) i know i've promised it like a lifetime ago, sorry for the delay! oh, and i decided to combine it with a prompt i also received a long while ago <3

Mike doesn't know why he's doing this. Doesn't understand how he agreed to it, can't comprehend why Erwin would make him do it. Mike doesn't know what he had done to deserve this- this punishment.

He's- he's a good man. An honest one. He serves to ensure the future of humanity, he risks his life to give others a better one.

He's good at it too, he's excellent at fighting and slashing and scouting. He was the best one at it, before- before the annoying midget came.

The same annoying midget, who is insanely strong and easily irritated. The same annoying midget, who has a crush on their adorable Hange. Hange, who Mike has to seduce to test Erwin's theory that Levi, insanely strong, easily irritated Levi, truly has a crush on their Hange.

Mike swallows heavily as he sits next to Hange, just a little too close as Erwin instructed. He smells that it won't end well.

He cringes, as he puts his arm around her shoulders.

Mike likes Hange, a lot actually. Sometimes he feels like they're siblings that were torn apart by some bigger entity. So yeah, he likes Hange. But definitely not like that.

But, oh well, anything for the cause, right?

"Hey, Hans," he murmurs, adopting his most seducting tone. He hopes that his smile is charming enough to captivate their dear scientist. "Are you free tonight? I have two tickets to the theater perfomance," he leans in closer, lowering his voice to what could probably (Mike is an eternal optimist!) be called an enticing whisper. "They're showing the creation of the the Walls tonight."

Somewhere on his periphery, Mike can see a swift dark shadow that oozes the smell of detergent. That shadow, it grows closer, its aura becoming more menacing.

Mike can only hope that if Levi attempts to kill him, Erwin would intervene.

Although... knowing Erwin, he'd just write Mike's death off as a necessary sacrifice.

He takes his hand off Hange. The shadow retreats a few steps back.

"Sorry, Mike," Hange shrugs with a small, apologizing smile. "I showed that play to Levi a few weeks ago. I had my fill of religious propaganda for now. But if you're looking for someone to accompany you," she winks and turns around. Mike's heart sinks. "Levi really liked going to the theatre! He'll be happy to tag along, right, Levi?"

Mike meets Levi's eyes, and sees nothing but desire for murder inside.

Mike quickly scrambles to his feet. "You know, I'll just ask Gelgar to go with me. I'm sure he doesn't have anything better to do."

And they can get wasted afterwards. Mike really needs that after this conversation.

Just as he retreats, Levi takes his place, sitting down next to Hange, also just a little too close.

The mission had failed spectacularly, but, Mike consoles himself, at least he learned that Hange and Levi went to theatre together. And sometimes intel is more important than the victory, right?

Ah, if only Erwin would share his opinion on that.

***

Erwin's second attempt is even worse than the first one, but, at least, this time it doesn't directly involve Mike. Still, he's an unwilling spectator to it, and, just as the last time, he doesn't like where all of this is going.

He already feels bad for the poor guy Erwin hired to hit on Hange during the annual military ball. Where did Erwin get the money - did he take them from the Corps' funds or his own allowance, Mike doesn't know, and, frankly, he isn't sure which option is more disturbing.

At least, the actor is handsome, Mike doesn't know if Hange would like him, he doesn't know if she has a type, and if she does, he hopes it's not annoying midgets, but the guy is handsome, there is no denying that.

Hange has cleaned up fairly well too, the white suit looks excellent on her, bringing out all of her best assets, demonstrating her wide hips and lean, long legs. The hair, gathered in a neat bun, shows her long, gorgeous neck, and the light make-up make her even more gorgeous than usual.

When she and Erwin walked through the front door - him in his blue suit and Hange in her white, symbolising their Wings of Freedom, everyone had their breath taken away.

Even Mike was a little shocked to see Hange dressed up like this, and Levi, who stood right next to him, was completely blown away, staring at Hange with wide-eyed, lovestruck look.

Thanks to Levi's ridiculous expression, Mike now understands why Erwin goes to such length to bring their resident weirdos together. It is delightful to watch Levi behave like that, and Mike longs to see more of this side of him.

Soon after Hange and Erwin make their grand entrance, their guy makes the first move.

He approaches Hange, his eyes bright and smile so charming it makes Mike envious that Hange is at the receiving end of it. He kisses her hand, whispers something in her ear.

"He praises her recent experiment. I thought it was a good place to start," Erwin explains quietly to him.

"Ah," Mike nods. So Erwin thought every detail through? Not surprising at all. "Think this would have an effect on Levi?"

"It already does," Erwin says, pointing to a furious cloud of black hair and suit that is approaching them at a rapid speed.

"Has four-eyes lost all shame?" Levi practically growls, his eyes throwing flames. "Is she seriously flirting with a fucker from the MP?"

"He's not a soldier," Mike answers, reciting a legend Erwin created. "He's actually a wealthy merchant from the South. Heard he sells apples to the King himself."

"And since when Hange is interested in someone like him," Levi crosses hands on his chest, his glare turning even darker, as Erwin's actor takes Hange by the hand and leads her to the dance floor.

"You know, you can ask Hange to a dance," Erwin advices with a pleased smile. "Then she won't be able to flirt with others."

Levi scoffs. "I would rather fight a horde of titans than dance with stinky four-eyes."

Maria, Rose and Sina, Mike thinks. They're worse than children.

"Hange has taken a bath before coming here," he tells Levi.

Levi rolls his eyes. "And now she looks even more awful than usual."

Mike shares a look with Erwin. Does Levi prefer usual Hange, when she doesn't bath for days and her eyes water from the lack of sleep? It almost sounds cute.

"This is the last time I'm attending this shitty ball," Levi swears to Erwin. "Even wine here is shitty."

He marches away immediately after that, heading to the table with wine. Mike can barely stop his laughter, as he watches Levi take a glass of wine, drink a few large gulps of it, and then wince, his mouth moving as he probably murmurs violent curses. He doesn't take his eyes off Hange and her dance partner, and relaxes only when the song ends.

Both Mike and Erwin watch intently as the actor kisses Hange's hand once again. Hange blushes, and Mike almost coos. Levi grabs another glass of wine.

When the actor starts leading Hange away, in the direction of the balcony, Levi starts moving too. He intercepts them just at the edge of the ballroom.

Mike knows he should have expected something like that, knows that Levi doesn't exactly possess the best of manners, but pouring wine over someone? Over his own colleague and friend? Mike certainly didn't expect that.

He's delighted to see what happens next, though.

What happens is that Hange's gorgeous white suit is ruined and Levi wraps his hand around her wrist and drags her to the bathroom. He sports a unusually pleased expression and Hange is laughing herself silly.

Not a bad ending to this endeavor, Mike thinks.

"Another disaster," Erwin sighs.

***

Third time is a charm, or so Mike hopes.

This time Erwin decides to take matter in his hands, and that another sign that this plan will succeed.

The plan is simple, yet, hopefully, effective. Erwin is to whisk Hange away to some remote location, create a scene that would look like a moment between lovers, and Mike is to call Levi there and make sure he witnesses it all.

Erwin is a brave man, Mike thinks, as his Commander explains the plan to him. He would never dare to do something like that to humanity's strongest. To awaken his jealous streak... Mike is glad he's not in Erwin's place.

One sunny afternoon, the plan is set in motion. Erwin takes Hange, and Mike goes to find Levi.

He finds him fairly quickly, in the middle of cleaning Hange's room. Man, he could at least try to make his crush be less discreet. But that's beside the point now, because Levi is cleaning Hange's room and not watching Erwin and Hange. Mike confidently strides up to him.

"Levi! I've just been looking for you."

"What do you need?" he asks boringly. "And have you seen four-eyes? I can't find her all day."

Erwin prepared some legend, a reason why Mike needs Levi, but in the heat of the moment, Mike can't remember a single word. So he just yells "Come with me!" and hope that Levi follows.

Thankfully, he does.

Mike leads him to the stables, where Erwin is already at it. His palm is on the wall, next to Hange's head, and from Mike's point of view, it certainly looks like they're in the middle of... something naughty.

Next to him, Levi tenses, and Mike can practically hear his teeth grinding.

Mike prepares for something very ugly, but then...

"I- I didn't know that Erwin and four-eyes-" oh, fuck, it sounds like Levi is genuinely sad, like he's heartbroken or something. Mike feels a strange desire to hug the little guy and pat his head. But then he remembers that he and Erwin are the reason for Levi's distress right now, and... remorse starts kicking in.

"Levi, listen, it's not-"

"Levi!"

As always, Hange is the one to save the day.

She breaks free from Erwin and sprints to Levi, a wide smile on her face. "You won't believe what Erwin had just told me! He gave me permission to go in the town's library and bring back all the books I want! I'm in dire need of your muscles, humanity's strongest, you'll go with me, right?"

Levi still seems grouchy, but under Hange's sunny grin, his angry facade crumbles. "I don't know if Commander will allow it..."

He doesn't even try to hide his bitterness and irration. Mike disguises his chuckle as a coughing fit.

"Erwin!" Hange turns to him, eyes pleading. "Can Levi go with me?"

"Sure," Erwin nods. "Take all the time you need."

Hange yells in triumph, loud enough to make Mike wince. She grabs Levi by the hand and drags him away. Erwin watches them with a wistful smile.

"I don't think we should get involved in their relationships," Mike says, as he approaches Erwin. He stands close to his Commander, their shoulders pressing against each other. "We should let them figure it out themselves."

"Agreed," Erwin says. "I'm sure they'll manage well enough even without us."

Mike watches Hange wrap her arm around Levi, and is inclined to agree. They will certainly manage without them both.

Or, at least, Hange is able to manage.

And that should be enough.

[whatifiamunepipe]

The"Gifted Kid" phenomenon is bullshit

I was going to write this as a reply to another post by @jihaad

but it got long, so now it's just going to be it's own post.

So, here's a story about me and my friend Dominic.

When I was literally a toddler, I got identified as a "gifted kid". My older sister was bored in her kindergarten classes, so our parents had her get an IQ test. This identified her as Very Smart, so something something, biological siblings, and boom. Suddenly I'm a "gifted kid" too.

When I was in preschool, I apparently complained to my mom about how I was bored with spending a week on each letter of the alphabet, and said she should stop paying the Catholic school for this. Our mom took the word of five year old me to heart-or so the story goes-and decided we should be homeschooled. Incidentally, she made enough money at her job that my dad was able to become the stay at home parent who homeschooled me and my sisters. I was lonely and poorly socialized. So, come age ten, I again complain to my parents, and it got me and my sisters sent to an actual school - another Catholic school. I started halfway through sixth grade year.

The official story is that I did exceptionally well. I graduated valedictorian and went to college, where I graduated early from the honors college with a 4.0, multiple majors, and many honors.

Now for Dominic

I met Dominic in middle school. We were in the same grade, I was the youngest in our class, him the oldest. He wasn't a "gifted kid". Instead, he got diagnosed with adhd because acted out in class, and didn't do his homework. He put saltines in a tupperware container and microwaved it once in middle school. It caught fire and he got detention. I cheered him on quietly from the sidelines.

Dominic's official story involves bad grades, bouncing between schools, graduating high school then getting a job. According to the official story, he didn't do well.

But here's what the official story leaves out:

The phenomenon of "gifted kids" is bullshit capitalist propaganda. Dominic has as much "inherent intelligence" as I do; I'll swear it to the gods and man and I'll die on this hill if I have to. And I have adhd. But because he got male socialization, because he acted out in class when he was bored, because he didn't have a stable home environment like I did, he got written off. Because I got female socialization, because I quietly relied on maladaptive daydreaming, because I did my homework at 11pm while crying or frantically in the hallways before school, I was a "pleasure to have in class."

I was jealous of Dominic. Dominic was a Troubled Youth, but so was I; both of us needed help that wasn't on offer.

If I had had about 5% less social anxiety, maybe if I had been amab, I would have been right there with him causing havoc and setting saltines on fire in the middle school cafeteria microwave. I was anxious, depressed, undiagnosed, and fairly sure I'd be dead in a ditch on the side of Highway 41 before I hit twenty-five. I didn't even believe that I was Smart until I got news that I was going to be valedictorian my senior year. Dominic, at least, had a much better time in middle school than I did. Mostly.

We were both literally, legally trapped in a school system that is built for indoctrination into the end-stage capitalist hellscape of the US. With a small side salad of education. I was still lucky, because when I got out, I had options for college, for "real life", because I had sat quietly and endured the suffering at the "right" times. Dominic was abandoned by the system because he couldn't. He made it to high school graduation, but when he got out, he didn't have the grades for college like I did, didn't have the family support, and he was so disillusioned with school and so sick of "learning" that he didn't even try to go.

I could say that the differences that made the difference between my story and his weren't anything under our control, that home life, economic status, gender socialization, etc. were factors relevant factors and that none of these were anything about us, but just features of the random starting point we drew in the great grab bag of life. I could say that we both got hurt, but in different ways for different reasons and to different degrees. And that would be true. It would be the criticism that gifted kid discourse needs to be intersectional or else is useless.

I still have the ability to reap the benefits of "succeeding" in the system. Dominic doesn't have that same privilege. But that is still an incomplete narrative overly reliant on the official story.

The real story is more than that the system isn't built for anyone. The very concept of "gifted kids" is a fabrication of a rigged system. There are no "gifted kids"; there are just kids.

The system didn't work for me; it nearly killed me. The only reason that I get to "reap the benefits" now, years later, is because the system doesn't stop at high school graduation; it's a sieve that intentionally feeds into what comes after. I "succeeded" because I sat there and took the abuse in the hopes that it would get better, that there would be some magical point in the future where things would be Good, where I would get to Reap The Benefits of Hard Work and Good Christian Suffering.

It's a system built on the lie of the Protestant Work Ethic, the same lie that motivates people to work themselves to death for the promise of a few "golden years" of retirement that they'll never see, and the American schooling system as it exists today is, in many ways, a sieve that sorts through those who can and do "function" through the abuse to meet an ideal of capitalist productivity and those who can't or won't.

[baeklination]

wanna drop by and tell you i love your one night stand fics. new orleans and evening standard? they're top tier ☝🏼☝🏼☝🏼 baekhyun's character there are my favorite 😵‍💫

speaking of his character in your fics i also really like him in not so rude! ok i'll stop here now hahah thank you for your writing ☺️

Hm, his character... Get outta here - it's his 5k fucking you like..!

👐, I'm kidding. I like 'em a lot too, a little sensual but chill. Might also be easier "getting to know them" since they are longer.

I swear, my next +2k is gonna be established, 10 year marriage - I don't have a singles, bar hopping propaganda agenda 👐.

Thank:

😅.