#I'll decide in the morning i guess
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Local flooding has really emphasized how many waterways there are along my commute.
#I'm supposed to go on a site visit to a ranch tomorrow#and TECHNICALLY I can see a route that would allow me to get there. assuming the maps are accurate#if i just zig-zag past 13 or so road closures#i don't really want to do that#but I also don't want to re-reschedule this meeting with the rancher#which is scarier - flooding or phone calls?#*screams*#I'll decide in the morning i guess#Juniper blethers#delete later
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Made myself a sona since I've been here for three years now, and don't see the hyperfixation fading any time soon, so why not?
Also bonus sketch: I mobianized my cat because I wanted to.
He's my little baby boy. He's scared of the sound of rain and his own collar. He WILL bite your hand and kick your shin if you get too close, and would probably blow up a car if left unsupervised, so I figured it was best to include him so I could keep an eye on him.
#I'm winning the bloody battle against the part of me that cringes. slowly. painfully. but I'm winning.#my art#sonic the hedgehog#sona#self insert#i guess#my sketches#I'm a cat because I've had roughly 10 different people tell me I remind them of a cat. so. Cat. Ragdoll specifically‚ I've decided.#he loves his fish toys and uses them as pillows I had to include one#it's 1am but I'll rb again in the morning.#I'm trying SO hard to open commissions and this was actually 100% done to get an idea for pricing. so that will hopefully be announced soon
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i've opened and closed the text post creator a million times because i think i'm going to say something, but then immediately delete it and close out. only to repeat the process.
#thoughts#i had thoughts i wanted to share#but every time i go to type them i think “that's unnecessary” and delete#in any case#i guess the most i'll say is i'm thinking about mcharrison this fine morning#and how i wanna write another fic for those two#but probably more for a modern-ish au#where they're neighbors and went over to each others houses every day#and there's kind of a pining for each other but they don't act on it#then john comes into their lives and creates a rift in their friendship#since george Does like john but gets jealous that this man has essentially swooped up and stole his friend#i can't decide if i want it to be like. a lennison hate fuck or a sad fwb mcharrison incident#i'll get there when i get there#anyways sorry for the tag spam#hope you all are doing swell this morning
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All of Me Loaves All of You [ch2]
[ch0 | NOW ON A03]
Today was the big day. Louise was woken up way too early for her taste, 6 a.m., to go to the wedding venue. To save on costs the whole thing was very DIY - aside from renting a ballroom and hiring a caterer, no way was Bob Belcher catering at his own daughter’s reception and missing out on the important stuff. Besides, he still hated catering.
So Louise had to be up at the buttcrack of dawn to go and help make sure everything was perfect. Which of course she was the perfect person for the overseeing of...just not for another few hours. Or at least 5 or so shots of espresso. Which she halfway downed on the drive with her parents and Gene.
Zeke’s cousin Leslie was already unfolding chairs outside when the Belchers arrived, a gaggle of children running around and not really helping. Who was helping though was a very tired looking blonde. Louise grimaced as Logan spun around, swinging a chair like Leatherface as he tried to not hit any of the children dashing about. He was very off balance and Louise sipped her caffeine and hoped she’d see him fall. Maybe he’d twist his ankle and someone else would have to stand it as best man. Leslie would be a suitable choice, he could even dance.
No such luck. Brown eyes squinted as the man righted himself and managed to set the chair down without incident. They then looked down at her just as dark coffee as the blonde started walking over with one of those smarmy little smirks of his.
“You gonna help with the labor or just stare at the workers?” he chided, arms crossed and that left brow of his raised so high Louise thought it may get lost in his bangs. Not bangs she could hide under like an umbrella if it rained, but a jungle that her fingers would probably get ensnared in if she-
She blinked. Then she scoffed. “Unlike yooou, I have the all important job of making sure the bride doesn’t lose her shit. This means that I don’t have to do manual labor, thank you very much.”
Logan rolled his eyes and huffed a little, but then he motioned to the building. “Bride-not-zilla is in there with Susmita already.” He looked like he was about to say something else, but Louise spoke first,
“Great well you keep doing a mediocre job out here and I’m gonna go crush it in the dressing room.”
She pushed past him, a little bit of coffee splashing his shirt and giving a “ha!” when he called out her name in an accusing whine.
Dodging way too rambunctious children, Louise crossed the lawn and the ballroom. Then she cracked the door open for a decency check before sliding in. Linda had beelined when they arrived and was flitting about while Susmita handed a robed Tina a thermos.
“Bit early for vodka ain’t it?” Louise cracked. Her sister gave a sleepy glare. She shrugged and muttered, “Tough crowd,” and went to the pile of bags. She and her mom had put their stuff in the same bag and now was the time for Louise to dig around. They had a couple of hours before they were needed for the photoshoots, but Louise knew if she wanted to avoid manual labor she should get ready asap.
“Louise don’t you wanna lounge for a bit in the fancy robes?” Linda asked, waving a fluffy pink robe around. The question stopped Louise in her tracks. She stared at the cloth in question as it beckoned like a siren. If she put that on then not only would she not be forced out of the room, but she also wouldn’t have to use any effort to make herself up much earlier than she needed.
“Yes Mother, I would like to lounge in the fancy robes, thank you.” Louise agreed while putting down the bag. She took the robe from her mom and slid it over her pj’s. The microfiber fleece lulled her into a sense of security. How can Tina be grumpy in this?! she wondered for a moment. But then she remembered how little sleep everyone had gotten.
“Alright so. What’s the game plan Sus?” She decided it was going to be much better directing all inquiries to the bride’s maid who had it all together.
-x-x-x-
An hour of sitting around later and Louise found herself growing….bored. She was currently hanging upside down on the settee, scrolling aimlessly on her phone. Her coffee was gone and replaced with a mimosa flute. Which she was nursing because she felt like 8 am was too early for alcohol but Linda was still always ready to get a party started.
“Besides, Louise, a mimosa is a morning drink. It’s perfectly acceptable,” the older woman insisted while lifting her own flute up.
“It’s a brunch drink, Mom,” she countered with a smile. “Brunch starts at 11, 10 if you’re being generous.”
“9 am if you’re in the Philippines,” Susmita chimed in without looking away from her tablet. Louise heard a Level Up come from the device and caught Susmita grin.
Linda let out a tchk. “Ahhhh you girls and your cement-ticks.”
“Semantics, Mom,” Tina joined in. Her tea was finally kicking in, she still wasn’t allowed to have coffee after that whole espresso episode she had as a teen.
“What did I say?”
“Nevermind, Mrs. Belcher. Hey, do you know when Gretchen will be here?” Susmita asked, expertly redirecting the subject. Louise admired that. It was nice to have someone else who could handle the family.
And like magic, the door opened to reveal….Tammy and Jocelyn. Louise groaned the smallest amount. The two may have grown up over the years, and sure Louise and Tammy have had their fair share of “same wavelength” moments but...
“Tinaaa, girl we’re heereee!” Tammy exclaimed with way too much energy for 8 in the morning. She made a type of shrill sound that Louise wasn’t sure she could describe. “I can’t believe you’re getting married today!”
“Yeaah you’re, like, making it so official today,” Jocelyn added in the same lilted monotone she’s always had. Her head turned to the minibar next. “Ooo is that orange juice?”
Some things don’t change and it was just too early. So Louise took this as her cue to stop hiding inside and flipped herself off the settee. “Whelp looks like you’ve got enough people to hold down the fort in here T, I’m gonna make sure everything’s going smooth on the battlefield,” she announced while straightening out her robe.
Before Tina could protest, Louise gave her older sister a quick kiss to the top of her head which was graciously washed this morning, and headed out the door with her mimosa in hand.
She didn’t immediately regret it, even if she had to quickly dodge a gaggle of scamps rushing by. But she did so without spilling mimosa, so that was a win. Smirking to herself, she noticed Gene shuffling by.
“Yo Gene, where’s the fire?” she called, already heading toward them.
The middle Belcher looked around without stopping. “Oh Louise!” They gave an appraising up and down glance before pointing. “I do hope that I have a robe waiting for me in either dressing room.” When Louise just raised her eyebrow, they shrugged and turned back to watch where they were going. “The fire’s at Alex’s van. Not a real fire, this time, just that the equipment is there and it needs to be-” they flailed an arm in the general direction of the building, “there.”
Louise now regretted coming outside. Or at least regretted blindly following her sibling. Carrying equipment while holding a drink was going to be way more work than she planned on doing.
“Bob why don’t you trade m-” a voice grabbed Louise’s attention, shaking her from her musings. Not that she’d admit just whose voice did that. A little ways in front of them Bob was at a wizard painted van with Alex and Logan, waving the blonde away with one arm and clutching something that looked hefty in the other.
“I got it, Logan, don’t-” pause for straining noise, “don’t worry about it.”
Gene and Louise shared an eye roll and hurried a little faster to the group. Louise shouted out, “Dad come on you’re one wrong breath away from dying at any moment, let the middle aged guy throw out his back instead.”
Close enough now, Louise could see Logan huff and roll his eyes. “I’m not even 30, Four Ears.”
“And?” she quipped back, not having any real backup. Which she cleverly hid with a sip of her drink. Seeming to pick his battles, Logan just shook his head. Louise thought she saw the corner of his lips tug up. But that’s something neither of them would admit.
Turning her attention back to her elderly father, Louise tutted. “For real, Dad, let someone else get that. I’ll trade you,” she said while holding out her half empty flute. The fast action caught the patriarch off guard and he precariously handed the cargo over in exchange. Louise finished the transaction by taking a careful step towards Logan.
“And now you take this,” she chimed while lifting the luggage by the handle. When the almost-30 year old took it without a second thought Louise prided herself on not cackling right away. The double take he did when he realized what happened caused her to burst, however.
Of course she had expertly weaseled her way into carrying the smallest thing there was. “You were really going to make the father of the bride carry a cd case? You monster,” she teased.
Logan let out a single bark of a laugh. “You should’ve been out here earlier when I handed him the extension cord.” The twinkle in his eye as Louise reached for imaginary pearls was not to be missed. And Louise thought she caught that too. “This is the last of it though. So classic Louise-timing.”
“Pssh, it’s an art, really,” the young woman boasted. She tried to block out Gene and Alex behind them. But when your sibling only knows stage whisper as a lowest setting that was difficult, especially when that skill is extended to their platonic soulmate.
It was Alex who spoke the question, “Do you think we’re going to perform at their wedding soon?”
And Gene who answered, “Not for another 7 years.”
“Right, right. In their 30’s,” Alex concluded, referring back to Gene’s ancient prophecy.
For the millionth time in 3 hours, Louise rolled her eyes. Gene said a lot of things off the cuff, and that was just one of those things. Her sibling was not a prophet, and she was never going to reconnect and marry Logan Barry Bush in her 30’s. For one thing, they had already reconnected now, before Louise’s 20’s. So that was already not going well in Gene’s favor.
Still, she cast a quick glance at Logan and noticed that his face was just the slightest shade of pink. An impish smile took her face.
“I don’t know Logan, I think we should see if Hall and Oates would get back together for us. If they’re still alive in 7 years that is,” she said a little louder than normal. The blonde had the briefest moment of confusion before that rusty gear in his brain clicked over.
“Awh but I was really looking forward to Beyonce,” he pouted.
“I don’t think we’d be able to afford her baby,” she consoled. Cue the indignant gasps from the peanut gallery in the back, and a confused noise from Bob up front. Choosing to leave the former suffering, Louise called out to the latter, “Nothing, Pops!” Then shared a snicker with Logan.
And that really helped pass the steps back to the main area. Thankfully because Louise was thinking that she needed a refill-osa after that. God maybe I am turning into Mom a little.
“So has anyone checked on Zeke?” she asked, setting down the cd case and opening the door to the building. Gene went right on past her, presumably to cash in on their own pink fuzzy robe. Without answering, so she assumed that was a “no”. So she looked directly at Logan.
“Yeah I’ve been checking in between tasks. He’s got the rest of the party in there with him for company.”
Satisfied with the answer, Louise gave a nod and went inside. Sure enough, Gene was walking out of the “girl’s room” in a fluffy pink robe and two flutes of whatever concoction they made. Louise knew one was non alcoholic for Alex, so it was probably just orange juice and Spryt. The two passed with a nod. However Gene paused and caught Louise’s attention.
“You’re not really gonna hire someone else to do music for your wedding, are you?”
The youngest Belcher sighed with a smile. “Of course not. If I ever get married you’re the first person I’m hiring. Third person I call. If I don’t dual-call Tina and Millie first I’m pretty sure they’d materialize and murder me.”
Gene laughed and gave a thoughtful, “That does sound like them.” Then they were out the door and waving one of the flutes around, splashing the contents everywhere. Louise chuckled and re-entered the bridal world once more.
Before she knew it, it was wedding time.
[ ch3]
#louigan#louise belcher/logan bush#louise belcher x logan bush#bob's burgers#bobs burgers#bob's burgers fanfic#starmoth's writing#holy fuck i actually did it#i committed and finished another chapter#also like i wrote the first paragraph and then left it for a while#thought up an idea post-shower and went “i'll remember”#went a while then after another shower went “shit wait idr. oh yes i do but i better write it this time”#spent about 20 minutes air drying bc i was jotting the idea that spiraled into a little more on my phone#and then when i moved it to my doc (which i forgot i had phone access to) i saw that i wrote the first paragraph already#so i was like. no biggie i'll move that to chapter 3#BUT GUESS WHAT'S GETTING PUSHED BACK ANOTHER CHAPTER#bc i wrote this in spurts and then at midnight decided i'd work on it while i had a pre-bed chicken sandwich#and i proceeded to write 1102 out of 2242 words when i should've stopped and gone to bed by 1#it is now 2:27 in the morning#i don't have work or anything but i was hoping to fix my sleep schedule#but damn if i don't listen to the call of the wrild#anyway a bit of the wedding and then the reception is next#also i can finally post to ao3 but that'll be maaaaybe tomorrow#i'm kinda just really really bad at posting things#oh also i didn't actually start writing until 12:20#i just thought about starting at midnight
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Guess who's finally trying to understand Self Ship Moodboards
#Koro-Sensei#Teruteru#Fatgum#Emile's... Edits? I think will be the tag#I GUESS#Emile's edits#Proship selfship#Proselfship#NOT open for request yet because these are clunky as hell and I need to work them out#If anyone wants to see me make a moodboard for a specific self ship of mine you can send an ask about it#And I would appreciate the encouragement as I figure this out#This was mostly googling 'color aesthetic' or 'personality trait aesthetic' and praying fdkgjfdkg#I think I did an okay job but each one took me like 30 minutes to an hour so kfmgjkfdgjkd#Anyway it's 4 in the morning (oops)#Tomorrow if I haven't gotten any suggestions on what to do next I might do specifically Regressed me's F/Os#Or the Omnics I'll decide when we get there#augh there are no good Transparents of Overwatch Omnics actually I may have a bad time with that#ANYWAY#Good night.#Enjoy my cluttered ass moodboards
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logically i know i need lithium so i don't go completely nuclear but if i'm gonna be crazy on lithium anyway what's the point in even taking it
#.txt#i only took it tonight because i need my levels checked tomorrow morning#i think they're out of range again. enough to mess me up. but i also think.#if i'm just fucking nuts (negative) on lithium then why should i bother#i know this is Mild Nuts compared to like. so nuclear i end up in a psych ward. but.#it's still bad enough that i ponder the merits of continuing to take this crap#it's impossible to keep my levels right so i end up crazy and maybe i'm just like.#fucked up in ways lithium can't fix. maybe my brain chemicals are beyond medication#whatever i guess i'll give it til my levels come back#which will be around when i run out of lithium. and then i can decide#i'm already on 1000mg a day i don't want to take more !!!!!!!!!!!!!! even if it makes me less crzy
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btw just posting this before i go to bed but i made a separate sideblog for qsmp shit -> @kingofthecapybaras
just testing it out for now bc the past couple of weeks i've felt Weird about being mostly dteam and co and the occasional foosh qsmp post (that hardly gets any attention here anyways cuz 90% of my followers are dtblr)
so just saying for the like 5 people who still wanna see that stuff that's where most of it will be for now. still gonna post non qsmp related foolish stuff here so ur good if u still want that too👍
#if you saw me say that i didnt wanna do this on priv literally yesterday no you didnt bc i thought abt it more and changed my mind#might change my url here. might not. we'll see#might decide i hate it and go back to how i was doing things before. we'll see!#also aware that like. no one is online rn cuz its late night/early morning#so i will prob rb this at some point(s) tomorrow too#actually can u rb ur own posts that have rbs off. guess i'll edit it if i have to lol
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good morning!! <3 💖🍁
#it's kazuha day :3#aka our one-year anniversary <3#i technically have some ficlets i could post I just dunno if I wanna post them together or separate#like there's one i /definitely/ wanna post today but the others *shrugs*#i could divide them and post that one separate and then all the ones in first-person pov get posted together another day#but i guess i'll decide before the day's over~#anyways my other plan is likely gonna be to reblog some of the past fics I've posted about him and <3#besides like playing hsr and my normal stuff ^^#but yeah :3#i hope you all have a good day/night!!#morning rambles#crow don't look
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argh...i got invited to a dinner party on 9/16. i don't know if i should decline because of rosh hashannah or not
#sasha speaks#it does sound nice but who knows if i'll have the energy to socialize after services...#it's for people to share their research in a low stress setting and get feedback either as prep for like a conference or something#or just for fun. and then dinner and socializing and stuff#which sounds nice. but. idk. maybe it'll be better for me to just stay home and cook a nice meal for myself and watch an opera or smth#then again is it sadder to spend the holiday all alone....i don't know. agh.#i wanna talk about me#idk what to do but i should probably respond to the invite#well...i'm meeting the host for coffee tomorrow morning. so i guess i'll have to decide soon#i'm not going to orchestra rehearsal the night before even though i won't be in services until saturday morning technically#but come on. i'm not going to rehearsal on RH. i'm making a nice dinner and lighting candles.
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I decided I'm taking the L and applying for the car part assembly place that my former neighbor works at cause A) she can vouch for me which increases my chances of actually getting it, B) all the places I actually wanted to work at either aren't hiring or never got back to me but this place is always hiring, and C) it's full-time and pays $17.75 an hour and I've looked at the rent prices for nearby apartments and calculated that with that pay I should be able to move out in about a year give or take so even though I won't enjoy it it'll be worth it in the long run.
#i also decided recently that freelance graphic artist is the career path i wanna take#so while i'm working there i'm gonna look for a good online graphic design course i can take#and then maybe while i'm at it i'll finally learn how to do digital art#and then i can actually start using my deviantart account and take commissions#y'know to make some extra money on the side#and then eventually when i get all that off the ground i can find an apartment over in kansas city and move there cause blue springs sucks#this is like the first time in my life i've actually had a long-term game plan for the foreseeable future so hopefully it actually works ou#but yeah the evening shift at this car place is from 2 pm to 10 pm#so i'm gonna find one of those online courses where you can do everything at your own pace#so that way i can do that in the mornings and work in the afternoons#also i'd be able to keep a consistent gym schedule#cause i could go to the gym early in the morning#i prefer going to the gym like as soon as it opens cause that's when it's the least crowded#so yeah fingers crossed all this shit goes according to plan i guess#former neighbor gave me a number to call some lady but obviously i'll have to wait til monday for that#cause she definitely won't be there on the weekend#shut up tristan
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body dysmorphia is INSANE
#i used to have troubles with dysphoria and gender and how im perceived#And then i decided to fuck that shit and just enjoy myself. And downloaded TikTok. And saw too many anorexic girlies#like im having breakdowns bc of my lil tummy and the next morning ik its stupid#but still. yesterday was the first time in forever i wore a dress and didnt feel Fat And Ugly tm#like im not skinny and I'll probably never be bc my physique just doesnt work like that but bc of that i view myself as obese#And its so stupid its so so stupid its so stupid its stupid i fucking hate it#also most of my friends make “dieting” a competition so no wonder. body positivity doesbt exist irl you will get judged#mine#tw dysmorphia#tw ed#I GUESS?
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.
#tag talk#all this turmoil is definitely related to me being unable to get one of my psych meds refilled#and yeah I probably should have gotten on top of that instead of letting myself run out#but my psychiatrist hasn't messaged me back and instead of messaging anyone else I've just accepted my fate#which is characteristic I guess. I lack agency. lack self advocacy.#I can't get my meds so I just resign myself to the worst two weeks I've had in a while as my body quits it suddenly.#and it's been rough. hella stomach issues. struggling with appetite. difficulty stomaching any food I do eat.#and I've been me for a while now. R is gone and I can't find her. she's hella checked out and I just have to wait for her to come back.#I tried reaching her this morning and I can't find her. the stomach issues and the constant headaches and just pain in general drove her of#I guess. so I've been on my own which is weird. even when I'm running things she's usually still backseat gaming#but I'm alone in my head and it's kinda lonely. I miss her. I want things to level back out so she comes back.#she's the one with the drive. the motivation. the laughter and fun. I'm just dour and stoic and I miss her#I don't want to go back on the psych meds. I don't want to risk this kind of thing again#I want to learn to handle my mood swings on my own. want to learn to deal with it myself instead of having this chemical risk#because these last two weeks have genuinely been hell and I don't want to ever risk this again. so no meds again#I'm still on the antidepressants and I want to stay on those. but not the mood meds. too much of a risk#idk. my head isn't clear right now so maybe I'll decide to go back on them. maybe R will put us back on them when she's back#we'll find out I guess
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omg my crazy ass dreams are coming back :D
#i love dreaming about being in horror movies its SO. FUN. :|#<- sarcasm#brains are so weird i was told that you can dream about what you think about regularly but earlier this morning i read a think abt art horr#thing*#and decided to take a nap and guess where i was.#it was really colorful though i'll give it that. and i kind of want to paint some of the stuff i saw but idk how to execute that#that being said. i wish i actually did dream about the things i regularly dream about bc it would be a much better time for me#think about*#i need to proofread more
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aaron’s wife going into labor on his birthday or the day before and gives birth on his birthday?
only more reasons to celebrate
happy birthday aaron 🥰 & the abridged version of ellie's debut!! (now it's official she and aaron share a birthday <3) cw; fem pregnant!reader, (sad) references to 9x5 and takes place end of 9x6, vague childbirth talk with no specific details, fluff!!! wc; 1.3k
"Happy almost birthday. I'll keep it on the DL." You heard Penelope utter to Aaron, faintly as she walked past him.
"Thank you." He replied, finding your eyes and offering a wink.
Come tomorrow, he was confident it would be anything but on the down low. He knew you, and although you were about ready to pop, you would go all out for him as much as you possibly could.
And he was right - you and Jack had already planned his day out to a T, beginning with a birthday banner and all.
"Okay everybody, I guess it's time-" Penelope spoke to the group, embracing her role as hostess, holding the team's very first Day of the Dead party.
You smiled to yourself at their brief exchange, your eyes flicking between the two of them. Your heart warmed, especially when Aaron sidled alongside you, a hand finding your lower back.
After the last few weeks, after what Aaron had endured, there was only more of a reason to celebrate. His close proximity; the heat radiating from his body, the smell of his cologne, choked you up immediately.
Sole reminders he was in fact, here.
Undergoing emergency surgery, fighting for his life - all of which nearly sent you into an early labor - once again he had defied all odds. It could've been very likely you could've been celebrating his birthday without him, talking to him through a candle as he and Jack did to Haley.
You immediately pushed the thought from your mind. It petrified you. Losing him. Bringing your baby into the world without him. Jack losing another parent. Life without Aaron. You couldn't afford to think like that.
And now, with that in the past, it finally felt as if life were settling back down. As much as it could, at least. The newest Hotchner addition soon to make their arrival into your family.
"Hey," You said softly, mumbling underneath Penelope's spiel. "I love you."
His hand moved from your back to your shoulder, offering a comforting squeeze. "I love you."
But despite your want for a bit of normalcy, it was interrupted by twinge erupting in your body. It wasn't your first little pang either, but you figured - it couldn't be. Not yet.
JJ, on the other hand, was keyed in onto you. She's been studying you all night long, throughout all of Penelope's planned extravaganzas - appetizers, the remembrances, enjoying the party. From every movement, reaction, facial expression.
It wasn't until the strongest contraction hit, and when you were beginning to seriously question it. She, out of all people, would know. She nearly did the same thing herself.
"What?" You innocently asked, despite the fact you knew, as her intensifying stare hadn't lifted from you in a fair few minutes. You flinched slightly, pain written across your face. You lowered your hand, deciding against the hors d'oeuvres you had been reaching for.
"How far apart are they?"
That was all JJ had to say, causing an instant standstill in the room. Aaron's eyes widened as they shot to you, realization filling them within a second. The rest of the team's conversations came to a halt, anticipating eyes on you. An excited squeal escaped Penelope.
Everything after that was a blur. Aaron getting you to the car in a frenzy; a very calm, and collected frenzy. Getting to the hospital, checking in, and experiencing the highs and lows of childbirth. At one point, you certainly cut off the circulation in Aaron's hand.
Come mid morning and an epidural later, she was here.
"Sorry for overshadowing your birthday." You took a break from admiring the little one swaddled in your arms to glance at your husband. It was hard to tear your gaze away. She was perfect.
And not only did you feel an outpouring amount of love for her, but Aaron as well. Viewing him in a different, lovingly light. It felt as if your chest could burst with infatuation. She was half you, half him. The two of you brought this bundle of joy into the world, together.
"Are you kidding?" Aaron gave you an almost offended look from where he was seated beside you, before a smile overtook his face. He pressed a kiss to your temple, gazing at your daughter too. "This is easily, easily the best birthday I could ever imagine. You've given me the greatest gift. Thank you for making it even more special, sweetheart."
The happiness on your face grew, and he immediately gave you a kiss. You could feel his smile.
"Thank you for making me a Dad again."
Later in the day, Jack's head poked through the crack of the door, a grinning Jessica behind him.
"Hey," Aaron beckoned the two of them in, both entering slowly. Jess had a plastic tray of cupcakes in hand. Celebrations were in order, times two.
"Hi Mom, Dad."
Jack hesitantly approached, surprisingly shy. You imagined Jessica had given him the quiet talk on the way up. Either that, or maybe he was still a bit weary from when he visited Aaron in the hospital a few weeks ago - there was the smallest bit of worrisome furrowed in his brows.
Jess stepped off to the side, allowing the four of you to have your moment.
"Hi buddy." You greeted as your eyes immediately welled up, the emotion clear in your voice; overwhelmed from enduring childbirth, your hormones everywhere, and the pure happiness coursing through your veins. "Wanna meet your sister?"
It was surreal too; Jack finally meeting his little sibling. After months of excitement, preparation, talks of what life would be like with a new addition. The time had finally arrived.
Right now. Right now was the beginning of their bond that was sure to be the most special thing.
"Sister?" His face lit up, any remaining hesitations aside as he made it to your bedside, attempting to lean over to get a clearer view. "She's a girl?"
"Here, careful." Aaron's hands extended forward, helping him onto the hospital bed. You were sore, multiple IVs were poking into you, and to make certain the baby wasn't disrupted by any of the movement.
Jack nestled gently into your side, peering at her in absolute awe. The smallest of breaths left him, you could feel his exhale on your arm. "I can't believe that's really her. She's so tiny."
"Isn't she? Can you believe you were this small once?" You asked, adjusting the blanket to expose a bit more of her face. At the action, Aaron's posture straightened, ready to assist if needed, or to simply do it for you. He was definitely worried you'd somehow overexert yourself. "Are you up for holding her?"
Jack's expression widened, nodding vigorously as Aaron did help this time - moving her from your arms to his, and ensuring the back of her head was supported. The classic pillow-under-the elbow strategy.
Once settled, her eyes opened for a moment, blinking up at her big brother, as if she knew she was being held by him. Jack's gaze lifted in shock, glancing between you and Aaron. Once again, cue your tears.
"What's her name?"
"Eleanor." Aaron answered proudly, another smile tugging on his lips. You met his gaze, grinning.
"She shares a birthday with you Dad." Jack stated, using the side of his index finger to brush her cheek. "That's so cool. You guys are like twins."
"Yeah well, we'll see how much Eleanor likes it as she gets older."
You playfully rolled your eyes, your reaction causing a chuckle to exit Aaron. His hand found the back of your head, lovingly smoothing your hair down.
"It's very cool." Aaron still confirmed, his heart full. "I was just telling Mom, this is one the best presents I could ever receive."
"And two birthdays mean two birthday cakes." Jack looked up at his father, grinning from ear to ear. "Ellie will love it."
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fluff#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x fem!reader#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner imagine#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds x you#criminal minds drabble#aaron hotchner drabble#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds fanfiction#hotch imagine#criminal minds x fem!reader
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JUST TEASIN’
summary: you call joel an old man…amongst other names
pairing: joel miller x reader
word count: 4.4k [i need to learn how to keep things concise]
warnings: 18+, cursing, spanking, p in v, fingering, oral (male receiving), age gap? totally legal though, joel's in his early 40s and reader is in her early 30s, joel is an ass guy which is strange cause i always make my men boob guys, idk i guess this is pretty tame
a/n: as a joke i tend to call pedro and joel peepaw cause he’s older and a total dilf but i love these men so fucking much. i'll be the first to get on my knees
thought i’d make a sweet oneshot about how they’d react to you calling them old. it’s a mix of fluff and smut. a little something for everyone!
also don’t judge me, this is my first time writing for joel 🥺
there’s a little nudge to another favorite fictional men of mine
i want to thank @yxtkiwiyxt for providing me with all the pedro pascal pictures and gifs and movie trailers and for ranting with me all day every day about how amazing this human is… if anyone is to blame about this oneshot it’s her ❤️
It’s one of those lazy Sunday mornings where everyone sleeps in, leaving the Miller household at complete ease. There are no responsibilities to tend to and nowhere to go.
You’re the only one awake, singing quietly under your breath and flipping pancakes until they’re nice and golden. Joel will come seeking you out soon, missing the warmth of your body and Sarah will follow when Joel cracks her door open to let the sweet smell of batter waft into her room.
No matter how hard you try you’re always the first one up. Sometimes you stay in bed with your husband, tracing figures on his bare skin until he pulls you into him and kisses your head good morning, raspy voice begging you for five more minutes.
But most of the time you decide on getting up and having an early start to your day, which includes making breakfast and sorting through your work emails.
The puppy Sarah adopted a couple weeks ago, sits on your feet, licking your legs as if begging for the fluffy sweetness of the pancakes. He had a taste of it when batter dripped on the floor, he licked it up before you had the chance of cleaning it.
Lost in your little world, singing to the tune of Lana del Rey you fail to notice your husband coming down the stairs. Joel leans against the kitchen island admiring you in your distracted state. The loose brown curls in a disarray at the top of his head.
His eyes scan you from head to toe, noting your messy hair pulled up to a half ponytail half bun thing he can’t begin to explain. Down they go to the cropped tshirt with his company’s logo on the back. The frayed edges are the byproduct of your use of kitchen scissors to crop it yourself.
Joel bites his lip as he ogles at your ass and thick thighs framed by the tiniest cotton shorts he’s ever seen. They fail to cover the bottom of your butt cheeks, exposing a sliver of the indigo panties and the crease where thighs meet butt.
Unable to stay away, Joel wraps his warm arms around your waist as he presses a kiss to your temple. He squeezes you to him, bodies pressed flushed to reveal the stiffness in his pajama pants.
The puppy wags his tail in the presence of his favorite human, standing on two legs to call his attention. The man didn’t want him in the first place but was out voted by the females in the household.
“Morning,” Joel murmurs, placing kisses all over your cheeks and down your neck until he finally presses a warm kiss on your shoulder where he rests his chin to look over at the stovetop.
“Morning old man,” you say with a giggle as his scruffy beard tickles your skin. Your lips press against his in a quick kiss, muffling his sigh of disappointment.
“Don’t start, sweetheart,” he warns. His lips brushing against your ear. Joel’s hands find themselves under your tshirt, his thumbs ghosting over your underboob. At the same time the fingertips of his other hand teasingly dip on the waistband of your shorts.
“Or what?” You say with a bite to your lip, flipping over the last batch of pancakes. Couple more seconds and they would’ve burned—that’s how much he distracts you.
“It’s too early for this!” Sarah’s high pitched voice yells. “Not in the kitchen and not in front of the baby, please!”
The puppy scrambles over to Sarah, jumping into her arms. He recognizes she’s the one who will cave and give him scraps of food.
Joel, startled, takes his hands off of you, facing Sarah with an apologetic smile, not that she sees it as she covers her eyes with a hand. “Are you decent? Can I look now? I’m really hungry if you don’t mind.”
You laugh loudly, shaking your head at Sarah’s dramatics. She takes after Joel and is well on her way to beat him at his own game.
“We’re not doin’ anythin’,” Joel mumbles, sitting on one of the kitchen island stools and petting the pups fluffy head, and the ear that flipped over cutely.
“Not yet,” you whisper to him as you place his stack of pancakes in front of him.
“I heard that!” Sarah yells, covering her ears this time. Joel laughs, nudging her shoulder and telling her to pass the syrup.
You lean across from them, grabbing a sliced strawberry to plop into your mouth. Sarah takes over the conversation as you and Joel share a glance. This is far from over.
Later on the day you head outside with a tray of lemonade and pie in your hands. You’ve gotta take care of your dear husband before the Texas heat gets the best of him.
You nudge Joel’s leg with your foot. He’s under the beat up truck, fixing some odd part. He has the means to replace the old thing but he likes to remind you that ‘Betsy,’ as he’s named his truck, is a part of the family and will never be replaced.
“Thanks, darlin,‘“ he drawls, wiping his dirty hands on a random rag he found on the bed of the truck.
Joel takes a second too long to get up from the floor. You see the hesitance in his eyes as he tries to think the best way to stand without hurting or pulling a muscle.
This is your chance. “Need help there, grandpa?” You pipe up, resting the tray on the portable table scattered with tools.
Joel openly glares at you while you smile broadly at him. It’s not often you make fun of his age, or rather, the age gap between the two of you. It’s only when you’re feeling a particular sort of way.
The age gap between the two of you isn’t the craziest but it’s large enough for people to notice. Joel is easily through the first half of his fourth decade, while you are barely entering your third.
“Watch your mouth,” Joel warns you, standing up quickly despite the cracking of his knees and the ache on his lower back.
Your eyes spark when he grabs the glass of cool lemonade and begins chugging it. The drops of sweat sliding down his neck and into the damp collar of his shirt stealing your attention and any innocent thought you’ve might’ve had about him. They weren’t many to begin with.
You clench your thighs together as you imagine licking that same trail, tasting his salty skin. Say what you want but you love a man that works with his hands and gets all dirty and grimy.
Joel catches onto the glazed look covering your eyes and grasps your chin between his thumb and pointer finger. His body gravitating towards yours as if nature demanded it.
You’re overly conscious of the motor oil covering his hands if not you would’ve sucked his thumb into your mouth, reminding him just exactly you can do with your tongue.
“What’s in that pretty lil head of yours, darlin’?”
Him. It’s all about him. He’s always interrupting whatever sane thought you have. Scenarios of you being bent over the hood of the truck as he sinks his aching length from behind. You riding him in the front seat as you’ve done on more than one occasion, fogging up the windows. The time he was knuckles deep inside of you, teasing fingers drenched during his lunch break.
“How good gray looks on you,” you reply, diverting the conversation somewhere else entirely. A delicate fingers wraps around the charming curl that constantly falls over his forehead, twirling it around.
Joel doesn’t take kindly to your comment, rolling his eyes and clicking his jaw as he lets go of you to return to the truck. Your hand which had been playing with his curl drops to your side as you cock your hip to assess him.
He’s much too aware of the age gap, it makes him insecure. Like you’ll one day realize you’re with an old man and leave him for someone younger.
Except in your eyes he’s the most perfect man alive. The grey streaks of hair that mix with the typical brown of his curls give him an air of authority, making him look dashing in all ways. A silver fox. Strong muscles from working manual labor most of his life are now covered with a healthy layer of fat but remain strong nonetheless. Warm brown eyes that sweep you off your feet every morning as soon as they open.
That man is aging like fine wine and he doesn’t begin to realize it. You feel extremely lucky to be the only one to enjoy it…squeaky joints and all.
Joel is experienced and mature and loyal. He simply wants to have a nice life with his family. A family you’re now a part of. It’s all a woman could ask for.
“You know I love you,” you tell him, wrapping your arms around him as he leans over the hood.
“Love to torture me,” he scoffs, taking hold of one of your hands affectionately. He can never stay mad at you.
“I don’t know what you mean? I brought you lemonade and even that apple pie you love so much,” you feign innocence, pressing a kiss to the middle of his back.
Facing you with a sigh, he lets his heavy hands fall on your hips, “What’re you playing at?”
“Me? Nothing,” you say with a wicked smile, “I’m gonna go with Sarah to the mall to get her homecoming dress. Will you be alright here with Ghost?”
He’s quickly distracted by the words Sarah and Homecoming. His babygirl is growing too fast, starting High School and going on dances with boys. She hasn’t told him yet if she’s been invited by someone and he hopes it stays that way.
There’s no way he’s letting her go with a date and you can’t convince him other wise. If she wants a date she can take the puppy she adopted, Ghost. Joel is determined to teach the ball of fur how to defend his daughter.
“Here,” he says, pulling out his wallet to hand you his credit card.
“No, it’s my treat!” You say, pushing his hand away.
“Take it,” Joel insists, trying to slip it into the tight pair of jeans you’re wearing. Fuck. How didn’t he notice until now.
It should be illegal to wear jeans that make you look THAT good. The blue material hugs your thighs tightly and lifts your perky ass to heaven—not that you other wise need it.
He doesn’t hold back and slides his palms on your back pockets, giving you a firm squeeze. You stumble, falling onto him with a weak protest.
“‘M so fucking lucky you’re my woman,” he groans, taking another feel. Temporarily forgetting the conversation at hand, yet another comment directed at his age snaps Joel back to reality.
“Honey, I know I married an older man but it wasn’t for your money,” you tease again, patting his cheek and removing his hands from your pockets—credit card and all.
A sharp slap to your ass, startles you, eliciting a cheeky giggle. All this teasing and you’re leaving him home alone with the mutt.
You don’t apologize, you’ll never apologize for teasing him. Unless it’s in the right circumstances…in his bed.
Towards the end of the night you finish pushing him to the edge of no return. Remember, opportunities are always around when you’re determined.
“Dad, can you sign this for school?” Sarah comes into the living room where you and Joel are watching a movie. Ghost’s head is plopped on his lap, where Joel had been ‘forced’ to pet him.
“What’s this for?” Joel tries to read the paper but has to keep it at arms reach to be able to read it. Failing, he searches for his glasses until Sarah points at his head where they’ve been resting for half the night, nestled between his curls.
You stifle a laugh as you think of what to say. “Sorry Sarah, good old peepaw needs his glasses to read.”
It’s clear you’re pushing it far as Joel freezes only to glare at you. If looks could kill you’d be six feet underground. Sarah laughs until her belly hurts, repeating the word peepaw between breaths.
“You two are bullies,” Joel shakes his head in disbelief, signing the permit and handing it to Sarah who is wiping her tears away.
“I’m heading to bed, goodnight old man,” Sarah tells a pouting Joel, kissing his cheek and running up the stairs. “Come on, Ghost. Bedtime!”
“Peepaw? Really?” Joel raises his eyebrows at you when both Sarah and Ghost are gone.
You shrug feigning innocence, hiding your smile with the edge of the blanket. ”Yeah, peepaw. It’s cute.”
“It ain’t cute,” Joel kisses his teeth before turning off the TV and standing from the couch, leaving you behind.
“Where are you going?” You call after him.
“To bed,” he dryly responds, shutting off the lights and climbing the stairs. He only leaves the lamp by the couch on. How considerate of him.
“What? Joel it’s barely 10!” Hiding your satisfaction is difficult. Joel’s ticked off, a day of calling him old will do that. It’s exactly what you hoped for.
“Guess that’s what old men do, darlin,’” Joel says sarcastically half way up the stairs.
With a hand over your mouth, you follow him, “Honey, come on. Don’t be angry, it’s harmless teasing. Are you really heading to bed?”
Joel turns at the top of the stairs, glaring down at you, “You really think I’m an old man?”
“Technically speaking you are an older man,” you quip, scrunching your nose cutely.
“You know that’s not what I mean.” Joel crosses his arms, reprimanding you for your cheekiness.
“I dunno why you get like this, you should know I love my older men,” you say sultrily, although it falls on deaf ears as Joel retreats to the bedroom.
When you step into the bedroom you’re instantly pressed against the door, slamming it shut. Joel’s sneaky hands lock it. “You’re playing a dangerous game, darlin.’ Don’t make me bend you over my knee and give you a spanking.”
The thought alone makes you shudder in delight. Wetness instantly seeping into your underwear. You’ve finally succeeded. You have him right where you want him.
With your hands braced on his chest you deliver the final blow. “You sure your knees can take it?”
Disbelief flashes in Joel’s eyes, “That’s it!”
Grabbing your arms Joel leads you to the bed where he sits on the edge. He roughly pull down on your jeans, panties and all, leaving them pooled on your knees, limiting your mobility.
With another tug he lays you face down on his lap, holding your wrists behind you in a tight grip. Joel shakes his head at your upturned ass that’s waiting a little too eagerly for his touch.
Delight bubbles out of you and Joel is determined to take you down a notch or two. Let’s see how you handle this after fucking with him all damn day.
The first swat comes without warning, eliciting a gasp from you. It’s sharp and borderline painful. A red handprint magically appearing on your left butt cheek.
Joel massages and paws at the skin, getting ready to deliver another one. “Cat got your tongue?” He questions at your sudden silence.
You try to look over your shoulder and say, “Is that all you got?”
A sarcastic chuckle leaves Joel’s mouth. Then, three fast slaps are delivered, successfully earning him a whine from your pretty lips. He rubs on the sweltering flesh, easing some of the sting.
Finding their way to your thighs his fingers dig between them to cup your pussy. It’s no surprise that it’s warm, messy and slick. Clear strands extending from it to the inside of your thighs and covering his digits.
You’re a fucking vixen who loves to torture him for your own fucking pleasure and he’s the damn fool who falls for it each and every time.
“Touch me,” you huff, wiggling on his lap to grind on his hand, hoping to gain more contact with his coated digits.
“Touch you? Oh, darlin’ you’re not getting off the hook so easily,” Joel mentions darkly, retrieving his hand and landing yet another smack to your ass, making it ripple from the impact.
“Ow!” You flinch yet remain in the same position, expecting more. You fucking love when Joel gets rough with you. It’s a shame you have to gauge it out of him like this.
“Wasn’t this what you wanted? Hm?” Joel’s asks and when he doesn’t get a response his hand flies down once more. “What was it you called me?”
There’s a beat of silence before his hand strikes, this time aiming towards the middle. “Gra-grandpa,” you stutter at the small burst of pleasure.
“Mhm, what else darlin’?” He prompts again. His middle finger tracing the slit of your pussy, feeling you grow impossibly wetter. His pretty little wife is always so reactive to his touch.
“Old man.”
The stinging in your skin grows warmer, no doubt turning a considerable shade of cherry red. Yet the ache in your cunt obscures it all. The scraps of attention only makes your arousal worse.
“I think there was one more,” Joel hums, urging you on. His slick finger teasing your weeping entrance.
“P-peepaw,” you gasp when Joel pushes it in until his knuckle meets your delicate skin.
“That’s right, peepaw,” Joel repeats absentmindedly, pushing his middle finger in and out. Listening intently to the squishing sound your pussy makes.
He’ll have you calling him something else by the end of the night.
Tight walls grip his finger like a vice, refusing to let go. Soft puffs of air tumble out of your mouth and he knows your eyes are closed as you concentrate on the minimal pleasure he’s providing you with. It’ll never be enough to make you cum but it’ll keep you bothered.
“Get up,” Joel orders with a softer smack to your bottom, wiping his slick covered finger on your skin. He helps you up from the restrained position he kept you in and makes work of taking off your clothes.
Joel pulls and tugs on your shirt roughly, throwing it mindlessly across the room. He palms your tits briefly, pinching one of your nipples to make you whine his name. With cracking knees he kneels on the floor to help you out your jeans and underwear, kneading your thighs with his big strong hands.
He catches a glance of your reddening skin and feels a prickle of pride at the mark he left. Most of it will fade by morning but you’ll feel it nonetheless.
Sitting back on the edge of the bed he wordlessly motions you to get on your knees. A wicked smile spreads on your cheeks as you do as you’re told, kneeling between his spread legs.
Eager hands grasp his belt, undoing the worn leather to get to the button of his jeans. He provides no help, leaning back on his hands and simply watching you with hooded and expecting eyes.
You pull down on his jeans and underwear, revealing the happy trail that comes down his navel to the patch of brown at his pelvis.
His hard cock springs free once you’ve worked his pants down enough. A throaty groan coming from above you at the release of tension.
“Mmm,” you hum, grasping his length in your fist. His eyes meet yours when you look up to press a kiss to the tip, your hand pulling the thin skin back to reveal it.
“Stop with the teasin,’” Joel growls audibly, chastising you.
You rolls your eyes obnoxiosuly, “You’re no fun, g-“
A hand flies to your hair, gripping the roots tightly. Your eyes fly open, starting up at Joel. “You sure you want to finish that sentence, babygirl?”
“Maybe not,” you shrug with a pout, your hand mindlessly pumping his length.
“That’s what I thought.” Joel keeps his grip on your hair, pulling it back to see every detail of you taking his cock into your pretty mouth.
Your tongue goes flat against the underside of his shaft, tracing the vein that runs along his length and letting saliva drip all down and into your fisted hand. Joel watches intently as your lips wrap around the angry red tip of his cock.
You start off slow taking more of his length with each bob of your head. Your eyes never leaves his face, observing every small reaction he makes. The sharp intake of breath when your tongue grazes his tip, the furrowing of his eyebrows, the bobbing of his adam’s apple as he fails to keep his moans in.
The sudden jerk of Joel’s hips causes your eyes to water and screw shut. The initial intrusion of his cockhead unexpected yet welcome. Joel throws his head back, “That’s a fucking good girl.”
Those magic words make everything worth it as you messily continue to suck and lick every inch of his cock. Neither the tears in the corner of your eyes nor the saliva dripping down his length stop you from tasting him.
You swear you’re dripping on the floor as your pussy flutters at his pleased words. You could touch yourself but all your energy and attention goes to pleasing the man above you.
The pain of kneeling hard wood floor for an extended period of time doesn’t bother you and the ache on your jaw is barely noticeable because all your concentration is on Joel and making him feel good.
Joel continues to set the pace, his grip tight on your scalp. “Fuck, just like that,” he moans when you tease the crown of his cock expertly.
“Alright, that’s enough,” Joel’s voice lilts in a reprimanding voice.
A string of saliva connects you to the tip of him as your hand continuing to work on the rest of his length.
Joel takes note of your red rimmed eyes and flushed nose as well as in your swollen lips and moussed hair. The picture of you completely filthy and sexy.
Joel cups the back of your neck, bringing you up to his height. He brings you into a sloppy kiss consisting of teeth and tongue and saliva. Joel loves that can taste himself in your mouth. A job well done.
You straddle his lap so his cock grazes your dripping pussy, tugging needily at his tshirt. “Take it off,” you beg. Your lips separate for a brief second as the shirt comes off before they smash back together.
He complies but quickly reminds himself that this all started because you were calling him old. He can’t be quick to reward you.
You foolishly believe that’s it and you get to have him. Eagerly you try to sink into his cock but he holds you still, not letting you take him to the hilt.
“Who’s the tease now?” You pant against his lips, stealing another long kiss before whispering in his ear begging him to take you, to use you.
“I like to see you begging for it.” That’s Joel’s response as he pushes you off of him.
You protest but fall silent when he removes his remaining clothes. God you’re like a teenager desperate to fuck with clothes and all.
It drives Joel nuts the way you look at him with lust filled eyes. You bite your lip as you take him in all his glory, hands reaching to touch his chest.
He pulls you back to him, his cock wedged between the two of you. The saliva covering it, sticking to your skin. He cups your face, “You have something to say?”
“Nope.”
Joel to cos his head in disappointment, pushing you into bed and maneuvering you till your head is buried in the pillows and your ass is high in the air. It’s tinged a dozen shades of pink and red from his hands.
You wiggle your hips offering yourself to him. Air hits your pussy, giving you an idea of how aroused you are. That’s what happens whenever you have the pleasure of going down in Joel.
Joel grips himself, spreading his pre before pumping his hand. Smack. His hand flies down to strike your ass once more. Your back arches when Joel teases your entrance with the tip. He runs it up and down your slit, wetting it with your slick. He lightly pushes into you so only the tip is inside before he pulls out again.
“Please fuck me,” you plead breathlessly, attempting to rock back to get more of him inside you.
Joel laughs. “Now you’re nice and polite. Is there something else you want to tell me?” He asks expecting an apology.
“No,” you repeat stubbornly.
He’ll get you soon enough. There’s no way you’ll resist.
Joel’s cock brushes against your clit, making you jump and moan. He does it again and again. Your pussy clenches desperately wanting him inside of you.
“You sure? You don’t want to apologize?” He gives you another chance. Sinking his cock deeper into you to give you a taste before he pulls out.
You huff and pout but you can’t take it anymore. You need him. “I’m sorry!”
“Now, was that so hard,” Joel grunts, pushing his length all the way in, rewarding you.
You bury your head into the pillow, stifling the guttural moan that rips from your throat. You could die like this suffocated and blissfully impaled on Joel’s cock and be happy.
With a tight grip on your waist Joel fucks into you at his own pace, watching how easily you accept him, covering him with your essence. It feels fucking fantastic.
His skin slaps against yours rhythmically. You swear you can cum at that moment but Joel knows all your tells and he slows his pace, pushing into you only when the tip remains. Long, slow strokes keeping you from cumming.
“I wanna cum,” you cry out frustrated but he ignores you, edging you.
“If you want to cum tonight you have to stop calling me old,” Joel grits. This is torture for him as much as it is for you.
“I said I’m sorry,” you sob into the pillow, your back arching as you try and take matters into your own hands. Smack, another spank, warning you to stop.
“Will you stop calling me grandpa?”
You have the audacity to fucking hesitate. He’s serious about not letting you cum but he’s confident he’ll get you to cave in.
Joel pulls out his cock when you refuse to answer. He instantly misses the warmth and tightness of your walls. His cock is soaked with your slick, a creamy white substance covering him from root to tip.
Licking his middle and ring fingers he replaces his cock, feeling your walls clench around them. He pumps them angling them downward to reach that spot inside of you, his other hand pressing on your lower back so you arch more.
“Oh fuck,” you gasp when this thumb presses on your bud. An orgasm quickly building. “Please Joel.” You wanted to cum around his cock not his fingers but at this point you’ll take anything you can get. Your mind is completely clouded and years for release.
“Did you reconsider what you wanted to call me?” Joel curves his fingers, quickening the pace.
“Yes,” you whine as your hips grind against his hand.
“And what’s that?” His fingers are sticky, your essence dripping down his hand.
“Please, daddy,” you cry abashedly, hiding your reddening face in the pillows.
“I didn’t hear ya’ darlin’. How about you look at me when you speak?” Joel dares to say while his fingers continue to drive into you.
Fuck, your legs are shaking and the knot continues to tighten in your belly. You have to say it or Joel will stop. You turn your head to meet his eyes, “Please, daddy.”
“That’s more like it,” Joel’s raspy voice says, removing his fingers when you’re at the cusp once more.
You audibly groan in frustration but it’s interrupted when Joel eases his cock back into you Fucking you just as you want it, hard and fast.
The bed sheets are fisted in your hands as you hold on. Your nipples brushing against the bed with each thrust. It doesn’t take long at all for you both to titer over the edge. Your pussy squeezing tightly around him, milking him for all he’s worth.
When Joel pulls out you fall to lie on your stomach, catching your breath. He lies beside you doing the same. Sharing a glance you both start laughing.
“Next time you want it rough just tell me,” Joel shakes his head at you. He knew all along and yet it still pissed him off.
“It’s not the same, honey,” you sigh, kissing his shoulder. The nearest part of him you can reach without moving too much.
The following morning you wake up with a kink in your back and Joel being the ever loving husband brings you painkillers to bed where you’re lying still, “Take these grandma. They’ll make you feel better.”
He won’t ever call you ‘grandma’ again. The daggers you sent him were fucking terrifying.
listen...typically i'm not the biggest fan of the daddy kink...but when it works, it works
#fanfiction#nicksolemnlyswears#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel miller#tlou#the last of us fanfiction#the last of us#pedro pascal#pedro pascal fanfiction
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it's nice to have a friend
bucky barnes x reader
word count: 3.2k
summary: you're having the worst period you've had in a long time. bucky is determined to help you feel better.
author's note: this is a silly and smutty piece that i felt compelled to write when i got my period a few days ago!
warnings/tags: smutty, reader has a period, langauge, use of a vibrator, nipple stimulation, no use of y/n, use of a cbd gummy lol, 18+ only
Approximately every twenty-eight days, you curse the fact that you were born with a uterus and vagina.
This month, however, you were cursing that fact a bit earlier than expected. Cycle day twenty three, to be exact.
Your periods never start this early, but as soon as you opened your eyes at six o'clock this morning, you knew what had occured while you were asleep. You could feel the moisture that soaked through your underwear and pajama pants before you could turn on the light to see that your white sheets had been dyed bright crimson beneath where you'd been laying.
One load of laundry with extra stain remover and as much Pamprin max strength as one can safely take later, you are curled up on the couch of the compound's living room with a cup of coffee and a heating pad turned up so high that you risk first degree burns.
“Are you sure you don't want me to stay with you today? We can go to Coney Island another time,” Natasha tries to reason with you once again.
“I promise I'll be okay here,” you assure her. “These cramps are killing me, I won't be any fun to hang out with today. Go, enjoy yourself. When is the next time that you'll all have a free day and weather this perfect?” You gesture towards the sunshine streaming through the living room windows.
“If you're sure,” she caves after a few moments of hesitation. “Promise I’ll win you that stuffed panda that you wanted so badly last time.”
“I am going to hold you to that,” you tell her in a faux-serious tone.
After Natasha and the rest of your friends have left for their day of riding rollercoasters and eating hotdogs on the boardwalk, you turn on your comfort show and settle in for an unexciting and uncomfortable day by yourself.
A few hours later, you decide you've sat in the same position for long enough - you can practically feel your body morphing to the sofa. You're walking to the kitchen to refill your water bottle and find something to snack on when you collide with what feels like a brick wall.
A brick wall that happens to smell really, really fucking good.
You step back, finding that the brick wall is staring at you with a confused look on his face.
"What are you doing here?” Bucky asks as he glances you over from head to toe, taking in your choice of apparel - baggy sweats that are about two sizes too big for you, a cropped tank, and fuzzy slippers. You resist the urge to cross your arms over your stomach - you didn't think anyone else would be here today and the tank top you're wearing doesn't exactly conceal the period bloat you're currently experiencing.
"I live here,” you snap, a bit harsher than necessary. “What are you doing here?”
“I also live here,” he says, returning your attitude. You roll your eyes, maneuvering your way around where he blocks the doorway.
“What I mean,” he continues as he turns around, following you into the kitchen. “Is why aren't you with everyone at Coney Island?”
“I could ask you the same question,” you challenge, pouring some more ice into your cup. “Steve never shuts up about the glory days, all the time the two of you spent at Coney Island. I'm surprised you're not there with him right now.”
He huffs a laugh, pulling out one of the barstools at the kitchen's giant island and taking a seat. “We did spend a ridiculous amount of time at Coney Island,” he admits, his voice almost wistful. He hesitates before continuing, staring down at his hands as he traces a metal crevice on his left palm.
"But I haven't been to Coney Island since the forties. Guess I'm kinda scared it won't live up to my memories of it. Plus, I had a lot of laundry to catch up on, so..” he shrugs, trailing off.
You're taken aback by the honesty of his explanation. “Yeah, well,” you start awkwardly, turning away from him to search through a cabinet for something to eat. “I can't say that I know what it was like in the forties, but it's one of my favorite places, present day.”
“Then why are you hanging out by yourself while all of your friends are at one of your favorite places?”
Damn it, you curse internally. He's really not going to drop this. What should I say, that my uterine lining is falling out in clumps?
You grab a bag of freeze-dried fruit from the cabinet before turning back to face him, trying to come up with an excuse.
“I just didn't sleep great–” you come to an abrupt stop in the middle of your sentence as a blinding pain shoots through your lower abdomen. The bag of fruit falls to the floor as you steady yourself on the ledge of the counter with one hand, clutching your stomach with the other.
Bucky rises from his seat in an instant, closing the several feet of distance between the two of you in one big step.
"Are you okay? What’s going on?” His hands are both extended to you in an offer of help.
“I'm fine,” you say through a sharp intake of breath. “It’s.. it’s just cramps. Bad cramps,” you force the words out, propping your elbows up on the countertop to relax your body weight.
“Oh,” he says as realization dawns on him. He bends down to grab the bag of fruit that lays next to your feet, and then places it on the table in front of you. “I guess that answers my question, then,” he adds, referring to why you didn't go to Coney Island.
“Ya think?” You stand back upright, grabbing your snack and water bottle off of the counter. “Now, if you don’t mind, I have a busy day of bed-rotting ahead of me.”
“Some exercise would help,” he calls when you're about to exit the kitchen. “Laying in bed won't do much for you. A little bit of light exercise to release some beta-endorphins, maybe an abdominal massage–”
“Are you really man-splaining menstrual cycle pain management to me right now?” You ask, slowly turning to face him with an incredulous look on your face. “I wasn't aware that you had a medical license or that I asked for your opinion.”
“Just trying to help, sweetheart,” he shrugs with a mischievous grin.
“If you want to help, you can go get the Italian food that I'm craving and give me an abdominal massage yourself,” you practically spit at him. “Otherwise, keep the unsolicited advice to yourself and fuck off.”
You turn back around and all but run out of the room before you can process the shocked, albeit pleased look on his face.
After you've closed your bedroom door behind you (with perhaps a bit more force than necessary), you sink into the fresh sheets on your bed and shove several pieces of apricot into your mouth.
Rationally, you knew that Bucky's advice was solid, and that he was just trying to get a reaction out of you. That's just the kind of friendship that the two of you have. Sarcastic, teasing and occasionally… tension-filled.
You definitely didn't help the matter by telling him to massage your abdomen, but what does he expect when he suggests something as horrible as exercising during a time that you simply want nothing more than to melt into your mattress?
Your cell phone chimes from the pocket of your sweatpants. You dig it out and look at the text displayed across your lock screen.
Bucky Barnes: What kind of Italian food, specifically?
You would never admit it to him, but the corners of your mouth tug upwards into a smirk as you read his message.
You type: Don't you have a lot of laundry to catch up on? and press send. The message is marked as “read” right away.
He types. And types. And types some more – until those three dots indicating a message in progress disappear.
Whatever. You click your phone off and toss it somewhere in the covers around you.
The next couple hours are spent sitting under the near scalding stream of your shower, and then reading on your Kindle in the dark. As jealous as you are that your friends are undoubtedly having a blast today, you honestly don't mind your current situation - aside from feeling like your organs are being pulled out of your vagina, you hardly ever have days with zero obligations other than to just relax in whatever way you see fit.
A strong knock on your door causes you to lose your place on the page.
"You didn't give me a legitimate answer so I hope you like gnocchi, or eggplant parmesan, or traditional lasagna, or extra breadsticks..”
“You know, it's not funny to joke about carbs to someone when they are–”
You come to a stop in the middle of your sentence when you swing your door open to see him holding several plastic bags. An aroma of garlic and herbs hits you in the face.
Oh. Not a joke, then.
He extends one of the bags to you with his big, blue puppy dog eyes. You take it from him, opening the door further as an invitation to enter your bedroom.
"Consider this a peace offering,” he says, placing the other bags of food on your bed and perching awkwardly on the edge of your mattress. You close the door behind you, walking back to where you had previously been lounging on the bed.
“I'm sorry for being a smartass,” he adds more genuinely. “I just.. didn't like seeing you in pain. That's all.”
“This is far from my first period,” you shrug, not meeting his stare. “You get used to it after a while. But consider yourself forgiven.”
He gives you a small smile when you finally look up at him. He grabs a smaller bag that you hadn't noticed him carrying, one that is visibly less full than the others. He reaches inside, pulling out a small jar that he hands over to you.
Your brows furrow as you inspect it closely. “CBD gummies?” You ask, your brows now raising quizzically. You open the jar, popping one of the pink, cube-shaped gummies into your mouth. “Watermelon flavored CBD gummies?”
You notice the faintest trace of blush bloom across his cheeks. “I take them sometimes to help me sleep,” he starts, fiddling with some of the beading on your comforter. “But they can help with all different kinds of pain too, so I just thought you might like some.”
You close the jar, placing it on your bedside table before reaching over and grabbing his flesh hand in yours. “Thank you, Bucky,” you say, giving his hand a squeeze and then releasing it. “Really. I appreciate all of this.” You try to ignore the jolt of electricity that buzzes through you when your skin comes in contact with his. His hand is both softer and warmer than you would have imagined. It brings you back to the last words that you spewed at him in the kitchen earlier.
"A shit ton of pasta and CBD gummies,” you snort a laugh. “Would I be pushing my luck if I asked for that abdominal massage too?” You say it in a way that sounds halfway serious, halfway joking.
“If that's what you want,” he says lowly, turning to angle his body towards you on the bed. “Then just say the word.”
The air in your room suddenly feels suffocating.
It is what you want - but you're at a loss for words. So instead of a verbal response, you scoot over to the middle of the bed, closer to where he sits on the opposite side. You lay down so that your back is flat against the mattress, your head propped up by a single pillow.
Bucky's eyes widen in surprise, but he quickly wipes the look of astonishment from his features. He moves so that he's sitting directly next to your legs, giving him a proper angle to put his hands on your lower stomach.
You're wearing the same sweatpants and tank top from earlier, having thrown the outfit back on after your shower. The loose sweatpants hang low enough to expose your hip bones and the edge of your underwear.
The intimacy of the entire situation hits you the second that his hands make contact with your skin.
“Tell me if you want me to stop,” he murmurs, perhaps sensing your nerves. “Or if I do anything that doesn't feel good.”
Your eyes shut instinctively at the polar opposite sensations of his flesh and vibranium hands. Skin and metal, fire and ice.
“I will,” you assure him. Your words come out breathier than intended.
There's an immediate relief in your lower stomach as he rubs languid circles across your midriff. It's a feeling beyond pleasure as the cramps fade the more he touches you.
His vibranium pinky dances along the waistband of your underwear, causing goosebumps to spread across your skin. You try to focus on the relief he's bringing you - not the fact that you're wearing a thin tank top that leaves so much of your skin on display, giving him a clear view of the goosebumps that he's caused.
He continues with the precise motions until the pain in your abdomen has faded nearly entirely - you feel so good that you can't stop yourself from letting out the smallest moan when his flesh hand applies just the right amount of pressure near your pelvis.
You know he heard it - there's no way he didn't. Just as you know there's no way that he doesn't notice your fully hardened nipples through the thin fabric of your tank top.
You keep your eyes closed, terrified to meet his gaze in this state. You dread the moment that you feel his hands pull away from your skin.
"You know,” he starts, his voice possessing a strained edge. “I don't think this is good enough for you.”
Your eyes shoot open, looking at him in a nervous confusion. There's a glimmer in his eyes that you can't quite pinpoint - his stare trailing to your bedside table on the opposite side of you. “But I think I do know what could make you feel much better.”
“What are you talking about?” Your voice quivers as you follow his stare. You're not sure what he's looking at - all that sits on your nightstand is the CBD gummies he had just given you, your Kindle, a few books, a bottle of lotion, and the Himalayan salt lamp that paints you both in an orange glow.
He smirks before leaning across you - keeping his vibranium hand pressed firmly on your belly as he uses his flesh hand to pull open the drawer of the small table.
“Hey! What are you–” but he retrieves the object he’s looking for before you can finish questioning him. You freeze at what he's holding in his hand.
Your vibrator. Your glittery, lavender colored vibrator.
“How the fuck did you–”
“Do you think I can't hear you using this from across the hallway late at night?” He grins smugly. “That I can't hear your little whimpers when you think everyone's asleep?”
Your face heats up a hundred degrees. You don't know whether to be infuriated or massively turned on.
Both. You're definitely feeling a mix of both.
He clicks the power button, turning on the device to its lowest setting. He watches you for a moment, giving you ample time to tell him to fuck off.
Instead, you once again relax against the pillow, your body going limp for him. You spread your legs the slightest bit.
He takes this as his signal to proceed. Not taking his eyes off of your face, he trails the head of the wand from your lower stomach and over the fabric of your sweatpants until he reaches the apex of your thighs. Your nipples pucker once again, your thighs clenching around the tip of the vibrator.
Bucky moves the device in a circular motion, making your back arch off the bed and your head tip back.
How is it that it feels better when he massages you with it through your fucking pants than it does when you use it on your bare pussy?
You hear the clicking of a button again, and the force of the vibration over your clothed cunt increases. You grind down on the device, desperate for friction.
Bucky watches you with something akin to pride on his face.
“You know how I told you to tell me if I do something you don't like?” He asks as he pushes the head of the wand directly down on your clit with the perfect amount of pressure.
“Yeah,” you answer - it comes out like a moan that you'd hear in a porno.
“Good girl,” he praises. “Remember that.”
Before you can clear your head enough to wonder what he means, he's tugging up the cotton fabric of your tank top and exposing your breasts.
You gasp at the sensation of the cool air blowing from the AC coming in contact with your already hard nipples. Bucky leans forward, keeping the vibrator on your core, and captures one of your nipples in his mouth.
Your hand immediately goes to his hair, tugging the soft brown locks in your fingers to keep him in place. His free hand grasps your other breast, rolling your nipple between his fingers.
The combination of pleasure radiating from your pussy and his hand and mouth on you is fucking perfect. Fucking perfect, and all too much.
You clench your thighs together, riding against the vibrator until you feel warmth spreading through your lower belly.
“Oh my god, Bucky,” you moan - he groans when you say his name, the vibration sending you tumbling over the edge. You come hard, possibly harder than any other orgasm you've had in your life, thoroughly soaking your panties.
When you've finished writhing beneath him, Bucky pulls back, removing both his mouth and the vibrator. He clicks the device off, tossing it towards the foot of your bed.
You're panting, staring up at the ceiling, trying to process what the fuck just happened when you hear Bucky let out a low chuckle.
Your eyes snap to him, finding that he looks thoroughly pleased with himself.
"Can't say that's how I expected the day to go when I decided to sit this Coney Island trip out,” he sighs.
“You can say that again.” You sit upright, bending your legs and crossing them at the ankles. You lean forward, tugging your shirt back into place before pulling one of the bags of food to you.
"We should go sometime soon. Together,” you add, somewhat nervously. You aren't sure why - the guy just gave you the best orgasm of your life (and barely even touched you).
“Are you asking me on a date?” that sly smile reappears.
You shrug. “Yeah, I suppose I am.”
"Then my answer is yes. But only if you share some of this food with me.”
♡♡♡♡♡
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thanks so much for reading!!! can anyone tell that i really fucking love food by how often i incorporate it into my writing? 😅
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky x reader#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes one-shot#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky fic
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