#I’ve deleted so many posts here and on other sites because of that voice

[harmonizewithechoes]

One of my clearest memories as a Very Little Child was watching my mom blow bubbles with her gum and demanding that she do it over and over until I could figure out how she did it because it looked like magic to me.

I am now the mom of Very Little Children who are mystified by me blowing bubbles with my own gum and they are asking me to do it again and again. They act like it’s magic and I am too aware of Time.

[matan4il]

Saw your old post on Jewish rep. Curious as to your thoughts on crazy ex girlfriend?

Hi lovely Nonnie!

Oh wow. First off, thank you for reading my thoughts on Jewish representation! As for Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, I actually didn't know it had a Jewish angle? Which I feel says something about Tumblr. I have seen A LOT of CEG gifsets on my dash at one point and they were ALL about the bisexual man singing and dancing and having a cute younger bf. I guess, the whole thing about Tumblr is we're all in our own little fandom bubble, and then suddenly something blows up (presumably because it's SO outstanding) to a degree that it makes it into the bubble. And apparently if CEG had good Jewish rep, that was not seen as outstanding enough to blow up and cross into different bubbles.

I'm not saying anything for sure, maybe the Jewish rep on that show really didn’t deserve to blow up, and one thing is def not enough to form a bigger conclusion, but it’s not just one thing. I'm sometimes very frustrated by my Tumblr experience, precisely because this is supposedly a much more open, tolerant and accepting space than other social media sites. Yet, the first ask I ever got? Was from a Holocaust denier. May of 2021? Was hell for a lot of Jewish blogs on this site, I saw way too many getting bullied, some of them to the point where they had to delete completely. I see some blogs reblogging a post with an antisemitic libel one day and the next they reblog a "Happy Hanukkah!" post. Maybe they don’t even understand they’re helping to spread antisemitism, or maybe they’re using the congratulatory post to avoid accusations of being antisemitic, either way it’s a reminder that just because a blog shares one seemingly Jew-friendly post doesn’t actually make that blog a Jew-safe space. I see people going out of their way to love and hold up minority characters, and then leave out the Jewish ones. Posts about all kinds of global crises that affect minorities go viral regularly, but I will never forget the silence on Tumblr as the hostage situation in Texas was going on for 11 hours, and Jews were blogging about it, and some incredible non-Jews were amplifying our voices by reblogging those posts (including some amazing followers of mine), but not a single of these posts went viral, not a single one that I’ve seen made it to even 300 notes, let alone the tens and even hundreds of thousands of notes I’ve seen on other similar posts. It just tells me that something about the way western society educates on the subject of Jews as a minority and of antisemitism has failed. And I don't think it's exclusively about the inadequacies of most Jewish representation, but it's probably linked to (both shaping and being influenced by) it.

Now back to CEG... as you can gather, I have not watched it, but I will thanks to you. IDK when I'll start or how long it will take me, especially since I also just learned the other day that Hunters' s2 is going to air soon and I would like to try and express something about the Jewish representation there before this new (and final) season, which might include doing a quick binge-watch of s1. IDK if you'd like me to write about it when I do watch CEG? If so, just please be patient with me! Thank you in advance for your understanding.

Hope you have a great day and if you celebrate, have a very Happy Hanukkah! As always, here's my ask tag. xoxox

[fuwushiguro]

I just looked at a bunch of the responses from @decayish’s survey and I... lmfao.

It’s really brutal. It’s brutal to read some of the hateful things that apply to me and I’m sure a lot of other writers here. It’s also weirdly validating to see that a lot of people are too fucking lazy to reblog and appreciate writers how they deserve, it’s almost confirmation that my writing isn’t shit and no one likes the content I’m putting out. It’s just laziness.

My relationship with Tumblr has gone so downhill since last year. Last summer was probably when I last enjoyed it here. I have taken many hiatus’ and left with no intention of coming back a few times. 

The reason I do keep coming back is because Tumblr is very addictive. 

I gaslight myself into thinking “it’s not that bad” and then I feel shit again. This hasn’t been as much the case recently because I genuinely have stopped caring. Do I feel shit about lack of interaction and validation on my writing? Sure. It would upset anyone, I think. But I’ve learnt to not care.

I don’t feel like I used to when I used to log into Tumblr. I’d be excited to chat with friends, share my writing, and see what people have to say.

Now, I feel like I’ve turned into something I’m not. A content machine. I write. I post. I move on. I appreciate when I do get sweet asks, reblogs and comments, obviously. But it’s so rare. So few and far between that I’ve come to terms with not expecting it. 

I used to be able to churn writing out. I’d write a 15k monster in a day and be proud. Now I struggle to get to 1k. I write, now, because of patreon. Seeing that people care about my writing enough to pay for it is incredible motivation which has helped me to stop caring about interaction. 

But even then, I feel under immense pressure to write. I didn’t write for a little while and I lost a bunch of patrons. I was so mentally ill, suicidal etc. and couldn’t bear the thought of writing. Not that I’m blaming anyone for deleting their pledges, but it’s made me feel like I’m not allowed to take a break even if I’m desperate for one. 

Seeing how many people will only read a fic if smut is included is very fucked up I won’t lie. There is a horrendous relationship with explicit content and porn here where people won’t even entertain an incredibly well thought out and beautifully written fic if there’s no smut involved. I have so many writing ideas that don’t include smut. I only write smut because I know that’s all most people here care about. It’s sad. Really fucking sad. 

There are so many beautiful and talented writers here that are suffering. Suffering with their blogs, personal lives, existence. Tumblr used to be such a cool place. A place where people could post what they want, write what they want, and spread love. It’s just not like that anymore. There is no life on my dashboard. It’s incredibly dead and I miss how it used to be.

The lack of gratitude and appreciation on this site is just outright terrible. Please support us. Reblog our works. Comment on fics. Send asks. Make your favourite writers feel appreciated and seen. Valued. Because so many of us don’t.

I imagined a large problem with this is that there’s so many fic writers you think we are disposable. If one of us leaves you can run to another. But there might come a day where every single one of us quits writing for good. And then you’ll be so sorry that you didn’t give a few minutes of your time to show your gratitude to us writers. We aren’t disposable. Each and every one of us has a unique voice. Unique ideas. A unique way of storytelling and expressing ourselves. Thirty people can get the same prompt and still wind up producing thirty different pieces of writing. 

Some of the responses I saw on the server were just truly wretched. People being cruel about people’s writing choices. The way they write. The way they run their blogs and the content they post. These blogs are for fun. For freedom and expression.

Learn to be kind. We are people behind these screens. There is flesh and bone typing on the keys of keyboards to make the works you claim to love so much. But not enough to show us enough love.

Please, if you care about us at all, show us you care before it’s too late.

[script-nef]

I come for the interaction and the food | Miya Osamu

Category: crack, fluff

2k words; pseudo-reddit thread of Onigiri Miya

The owner of Onigiri Miya

Yo dudes. So my friend was raving about the onigiri shop for ages, and she was so damn relentless that I gave in. And I like onigiri in the first place, especially negitoro, so I went (is this TMI?). Anyway I was like???? So damn shook when I went in because the owner is like???? Damn??? He's so hot and I am simping for him, and the female population in the shop was as well like hearts were flying out of their eyes. I'm going to go there every day and ugh I know it’s cheesy and cliché but I hope he notices me or something like that DON’T JUDGE I’M LONELY OKAY??

Comments [Anon]: I KNOW RIGHT LIKE EVERYONE IS IN LOVE WITH HIM AND HIS ONIGIRI UGH FOOD FOR THE EYES AS WELL AS THE STOMACH

[Anon]: Y’all are simping for a real person and I just have to say: LMAO ME TOO UGH HE’S JUST REALLY HOT AND PATIENT AND HIS VOICE IS SO NICE  

[Anon]: YASSS HE REALLY IS AND HE ALWAYS COMES UP WITH NEW MENUS AND LETS SOME OF US TRY SAMPLES BUT IT’S ALWAYS. AMAZING. HE’S AN ONIGIRI GOD, I TELL YOU.

→ Continue thread

[Anon]: Um, OP? I don't know how to tell you this but… He has a girlfriend… like a really cute girlfriend who he’s been dating for years now.

[Anon]: Say what?

[Anon]: Hey what. What. I didn’t know this. I’ve been visiting his shop for like 3 months and I didn’t know this. What. 

[OP]: Oh. Great. My romance has died even before it started. ;^;

[Anon]: Well you can join us obsessing over their relationship! She visits a lot and they’re cute all the damn time so frequent customers made a small online group to share episodes. 

→ Continue thread

I just saw Hime and wow, damn

So I went to OM today—because wow it’s so delicious please open a second shop MyaSamu—and my eyes were blessed because WHO DID I SEE?? YEP, IT WAS HIME. 

Like y’all know how he calls her Hime as a nickname, which is so [censored] cute, and SHE LIVES UP TO THE NAME. There’s like, a graceful aura around her and it’s sort of blinding? As soon as you see her, it’s like “Ah, yep. That’s her. No one else can be called Hime other than her.” 

AND SHE GOT SO FLUSTERED WHEN I CALLED HER HIME BY ACCIDENT!! It just literally slipped out because I’m a [censored] idiot like that and she turned so red! And started hitting MyaSamu out of embarrassment! But her hits didn’t even look that painful and he was smiling so happily. My eyes were blessed that day.

Comments [Anon]: Oh my god you’re so lucky, I want to see him smile… I mean, he does, but apparently he smiles differently when he’s with Hime and I know that if I see that, my day will instantly become better.

[Anon]: Oh dude, you are not wrong. He somehow becomes more radiant. Just. How?

[Anon]: Imagine being that cute and beautiful together. What a power couple.

[Anon]: You know what happened once? I was really down while I was eating there because I got a bad grade, and she came over to talk to me!! Because apparently I looked way too sad and she was worried about me! UGH I’M FALLING FOR YOU HOW ARE YOU THIS KIND?! ARE YOU AN ACTUAL ANGEL?

[Anon]: This just confirmed, Hime was never human. She is the epitome of angelic grace here to save us and MyaSamu is so blessed for being with her.

Y’all are weird as [censored], why do you do this [censored]

Why are you guys obsessing over real people like that? I would be creeped out if I knew anyone does this, you guys are invading their privacy. Get a life and stop being so damn disturbing.

Comments [Anon]: ??? He knows about this. He literally checks up on this site a couple of times per week. He explicitly said to many customers “Thanks for liking me and my girlfriend so much. You guys are funny.” The [censored] are you on?

[Anon]: I asked Hime once before and she said it’s fine as well unless we’re stalking them or some [censored] like that. And we don’t. We’re just exchanging stories on our interactions with them inside the shop and how cute they are. He said it actually helps with his revenues and sales. 

[Anon]: Literally. They’re just really cute. Like you look at them and boom, you have diabetes, no exceptions.

[Anon]: I think he said like half of his new customers came after seeing this thread, so back off

Ignore that person, GUESS WHO I SAW

Y’all might be thinking Hime, and yes, I did see her as well. BUT I ALSO SAW ATSUMU! He was hanging with Hime and teasing her so much. Then MyaSamu got annoyed and they nearly brawled there lmao perfect representation of siblings.

Hime tried to stop them and when they kept on fighting, she slapped them both on the back and shouted for them to cool it. MyaSamu I guessed since they’re going out, but she tamed Atsumu. Atsumu. My heart thumped because she was so awesome. Like, you’re cool, kind, sweet, amazingly pretty and on top of that, badass as well? Lady, you should be designated as a national treasure.

Comments [Anon]: Bruh. I live super close to OM. I go there practically every week. I’ve filled out the coupon like, 5 times. I’ve never met Hime once. AND YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT YOU SAW HIME AS WELL AS ATSUMU???? WHY HAVE THE GODS FORSAKEN ME??

[Anon]: How cool was she? I can’t imagine Atsumu folding to anyone that’s not his parents.

[Anon]: I feel like he would be rude to his own parents tho lol

[Anon]: True true

[OP]: She was like, the epitome of cool. Based on the sound of the slap I would have been rolling on the floor while crying in pain but they kind of seem used to it or something? She just glowered at them and they immediately shut up. I wonder if she was like that when they started dating as well.

[Anon]: I find it funny that everyone is focusing on Hime while Miya Atsumu, division 1 volleyball player and one of the members of Japan’s national team, is right there.

[Anon]: Atsumu pales in comparison to Hime. This is a fact.

[Samu]: True

[Anon]: ??? The [censored]? Are my eyes working? Is that… actually Osamu? As in like, the Osamu that we’re talking about? Like the owner of OM?

[Samu]: Yes

[Anon]: Okay then bye I’m never coming here ever again. Goodbye y’all and watch me die haha [censored]

Friend of Samu and “Hime”

I can’t really believe this actually exists but it’s really funny and kinda cringey to see everyone fawn over Osamu and “Hime” like this. I've been their friend since high school and let me give you a fact: “Hime”’s nickname during her time in school was Janus like the two faced God. Because she’s really nice all the time but once she gets angry, it’s over for everyone. Everyone. 

So what do y’all do here, just share stories?

Comments [Anon]: Holy [censored] what. What. CAN YOU TELL US ABOUT THEM?? WHAT WERE THEY LIKE IN SCHOOL? WERE THEY STILL CUTE AND SWEET LIKE THE BEST BRAND OF CHOCOLATE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD????

[Anon]: YEAH LIKE WHITE CHOCOLATE

[Anon]: I’m sorry, but if you think white “chocolate” is good then please keep that [censored] to yourself because that [censored] embarrassing.

[Anon]: White chocolate is good!

[Anon]: You’re an embarrassment to humankind.

→ Continue thread

[Anon]: As the person on the above thread has said, could you share little stories of how they were like in school? If they’re fine with it?

[OP]: Hmm… well I’ll ask first. 

I got the permission

Hm, I don’t really know what to say about their relationship though. I was friends with them for a long while but it wasn’t really surprising when they started dating. Osamu’s liked her for years. I heard they were childhood friends and were stuck at the hip with Atsumu as well, but she was closer to Osamu. Though that’s kind of a given, what with Atsumu’s [censored] personality.

She was one of the school council members and really popular as well. Always eager to help people, has a smile on her face and a complete disaster. She’s so damn clumsy and uncoordinated that I once saw her trip on air. On air. How. She’s terrible at cooking as well, like apocalyptic level. She somehow managed to burn rice in home economics class even with three other people keeping an eye on her. It was actually pretty impressive.

Anyway, Osamu was absolutely smitten with her and everyone with eyes or common sense could see it. Except for… you guessed it, her. He would literally be tripping over himself to help her and we were all like “boy, please be more subtle you are killing us”. Especially Atsumu since he had to deal with that even at home because they’re neighbours. I once took a photo of him making the most disgusted and annoyed face, but it got deleted when I changed my phone. An international loss.

Where was I going with this? Oh right, how they went out. I gotta go to sleep so I’ll post that later.

Comments [Anon]: ???? YOU’RE GOING TO LEAVE US HANGING LIKE THAT??? HOW ARE YOU SO CRUEL THIS ISN’T FAIR I CAN’T GO TO SLEEP BECAUSE I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

[Anon]: EXCUSE ME ARE YOU SKILLED IN TORTURE BECAUSE I AM LITERALLY DYING YOU CAN’T JUST BOUNCE AFTER TELLING US THAT. COME BACK!!!!

[Anon]: Dudes I have a good idea. Let’s spam them with comments.

[Anon]: Oh ho, smart, smart. 

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

[Anon]: Dude

LOAD MORE

Damn you guys are persistent

Chill, I need my sleep as well. 

Alright, this was a while ago so some facts might be inaccurate. Also she forbade anyone from commenting on it during school. It’s fine now though, and thankfully I was sitting next to them when it happened.

So Osamu always brings bentos and makes hers as well. He used to make them for Atsumu as well (unwillingly but had to since he complained about it so much) but stopped after like, the second time because they got into a fight. I think the reason was that Atsumu was whining too much about how he doesn’t like some of the side-dishes and Osamu snapped. That was a fun day.

We were eating in the classroom and enjoying our lunch when she blurted out something like “Osamu, you’re so good at cooking! You’d be a great chef. Your wife would want to let you cook for the entire time you’re together!” Which was fine because everyone knows he’s good at cooking. I think that’s what you guys call a gap moe or something, I dunno.

And Osamu just stared at her. You know what moment when you just feel something bad is going to happen? Like that chill in your back? Yeah, it was that. I sensed that from Osamu. Atsumu probably got it as well because our eyes locked and the red alarm of “STOP HIM” flashed in front of both our eyes.

But before we could interrupt, Osamu just smiled and said “I can cook for you like that if you want.” And I [censored] you not, everyone went quiet. We were staring at him like “??? Did you just propose before even asking her out on a date?” And her face, oh god I didn’t know her face could be that red or that her eyes could be so big. She was literally frozen while trying to eat like the rest of us watching them.

When she stayed frozen, it was like there was an error message saying “[Name].exe has stopped working. What the [censored] did you do.” above her head. Osamu eventually moved and dragged her out of the classroom. And they didn’t come back until the bell rang for the next class.

I don’t know what happened during the talk, but I guess he finally confessed because they were holding hands when they came back. 

Anyway, yeah. That’s the story of how they went out. I have to sleep again so bye.

Comments [Anon]: WHAT THE [censored]

[whatstheproblembaby]

AO3 Tag Meme

@klaineharmony tagged me like last week and I’m just now getting to this, oops. >.<

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

273, although I have collection of <1000 word stories that I originally posted individually on here and FFn, so technically I’ve written closer to 300 fics, probably?

2. What is your total AO3 word count?

497,239. Not half bad for a one-shotter!

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

5, if we count my Newsies/Supergirl crossover for both fandoms. The others are Glee, Riverdale, and Call the Midwife. (God, that’s eclectic to list.)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

They’re all Klaine fics, to the surprise of absolutely no one:

1. But Now I See, my blind!Kurt/sighted!Blaine fic. (Tbh, I don’t love that I took this prompt and made the big moment in this one curing Kurt’s blindness, but I wasn’t aware of how ableist that trope is when I wrote it. I’m not going to delete it because that feels like sweeping it under the rug, but please know that I know better now.)

2. Unforgettable, a Cheerio!Kurt/nerd!Blaine AU based off this prompt: “You probably don’t remember but you saved me from some bullies once in middle school and god damn it every year you just get hotter"

3. Finally Found the Boy, a florist!Kurt/barista!Blaine AU in which I utilized every trope known to man: “#okay but combine all four: person a works at a coffeeshop #person b works at a flowershop #they start fake dating to cover for person a who's lied to their parents about meeting their soulmate #but then they do whatever thing reveals soulmates while fake dating and start REAL DATING #THE END”

4. Covert Cupid, aka your classic nerd!Kurt/jock!Blaine gift-giving AU. (You know, like Secret Santa, but for Valentine’s Day.)

5. Make A Move, a Cheerio!Blaine based off this anonymous prompt: “a klaine alternate meeting fic where one of them is working at a kissing booth and the other one keeps coming back with money and asking for kisses “for charity” and they basically end up making out in front of everybody bc the kisses are so great okay love u bye” (Yes, I DID use a One Direction lyric for the title; no, I am NOT sorry.)

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Every time! At the very least, I drop a “thank you” and a heart, because I’m just that grateful that anyone has enjoyed my fic enough TO leave a comment. If there’s a more specific comment, I try to address it, too.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Uh, probably none of them? Happily ever after or BUST, pals.

...

Okay, I literally looked through all of my fics and this drabble is the only thing that even REMOTELY ends angstily. Plenty of my work has some kind of drama in the middle, but I firmly don’t believe in tragic endings. 

7. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve ever written?

I’ve only done one proper crossover (e.g., featuring characters from both universes), but I’ve done plenty of AUs based on other pieces of IP! My one true crossover is Just Be Real (Is All I’m Askin’), which mixes Newsies and Supergirl with a dash of past lives/reincarnation. Listen, when you put Jeremy Jordan in two things I love, I’m gonna find a way to combine those things, friends.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I once got called out for using the term “maiden name” in a fic, but I’ve never truly been flamed or anything. Hope that stays true!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not often, and not outside of the Klaine fandom, at least as of right now. In those fics, I leaned a little more M than E in my ratings, and there were some D/s leanings, but that’s really based on how I saw that pairing. If I ever do smut for another fandom, I may totally mix up my kinks depending on how I see the couple/throuple/etc!

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I think I had some stories posted to at least one of those random pirate sites back in the day? But I’ve never been deliberately plagiarized that I know of.

11. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I’ve definitely tried! Truffles and I worked on at least one co-authored fic once, but I don’t remember if we ever posted it.

12. What’s your all time favorite ship?

I’m only supposed to have one???

13. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Like many Millennials, I’m sure, it was Harry Potter. If you go digging in MuggleNet FanFiction, you should be able to find my terrible acrostic poems from when I was 14.

14. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Oof, again with the favorites? I have a couple that I’m more proud of than others.

Of my Call the Midwife fics, I love What’s in a Name? the most, simply because I included so many characters and feel like I managed to capture all their unique voices/personalities. And I created a moment I want to see on the show!

For Newsies, my 9k beast We Just Might Win proved to me that I can write more than 2,000 words without having to base the story on another piece of IP, and I’ll always love it for that. (And for Jack, Davey, and Kath, of course!)

I’m proud of all my Klaine fics on some level, because they unlocked a creative output level in me that I genuinely will not ever be able to match again. I think a crowd favorite of mine was my Sound of Music AU, My Heart Will Be Blessed, but if I had to pick a personal fave? I’d have to go with Destiny. Caroline @thehouseofthebrave gave me this incredible prompt for it, and I just love how I filled it.

I think a lot of people have been tagged already, so anyone who wants to do this should tag me as their tagger, but I also want to see @knightsofthegaytable‘s answers!

[deathberryobssesion]

On anon because pjo fandom can be brutal, but in TLC or maybe a crossover with PJO and TKC? It's either Percy or Carter who sees a family illegally immigrating and basically says "I minded my own business they have enough problems, hopefully they'll be okay" IT'S IN TEXT! People read too much into things that do not need to be read into and essentially make the author out to be worse than they are. If an author is stating word for word in text some way they support something a "coded" message representing something else doesn't matter, sometimes he just needs plot he's not trying to say anything about anything political because he already said what he wanted to say in a different book OPENLY!

Ok I honestly don't remember that scene, since it's been so long that I've read a Riordan book, so I'll have to look into it.

There were just so many red flags in the video, and imma just say that I do not condone the harassment of anyone. I don't post on tt which is why I decided to rant about it here.

But my biggest issue in the video is that someone took 3 lines of text from a book, slapped some highly questionable "proof" to it, and decided to call it "Media Analysis"

Long story short, she starts the video as a welcome to her series in media analysis and begins by explaining that the US' views on immigration have "always been arbitrary and discriminatory." Rick Riordan, a white man from Texas, has internalized this so obviously he's already biased on his views of immigration.

She shows a few snippets of the book, among them being this screenshot

Now, he probably used this analogy to help the reader understand the relationship, though it mightve been a poor choice of words on his part. HOWEVER, remember that this is a story about gods and primordial forces. You cannot compare country borders to Life and Death. Once you die, you're supposed to stay dead, such is the nature of mortals. But to OP, this alludes to the very real social problem going on in the US.

Now, from these excerpts she claims Rick Riordan is using ICE propaganda in children's books. Riordan's writing is not perfect at all, I know that. Because he is white, his portrayal of certain characters, like Piper and Samirah, are definitely questionable.

What pisses me off the most, is that she refused to do any research on Riordan, essentially boiling down his entire moral views into "He loves ICE 😔" If she had, she would have known his Twitter is where he gives other writers (sometimes POC) a voice. He stands by his morals, and is genuinely a good person trying to be a white ally. His site is a good place to know where he stands morally. Instead she just assumed shit and is now being praised for it.

So no, you're not gonna do that kinda shit with Rick Riordan. He's not perfect but he is not that kind of man.

Also: she deleted my comment where I tell people to do their research 🤷🏽‍♀️

TLDR Someone was claiming Son of Neptune is ICE propanaganda. OPs "proof" was highly questionable and unresearched

[litwitlady]

Fic Writer Interview

NOTE: This will prove interesting since I deleted half my fic on AO3.

Tagged by: @lambourngb - <3

Name(s): Brooke, ALovelyLitwit on AO3, litwitlady on Tumblr (other names on other sites that I’m never sharing here)

Fandom(s): The ones where I’ve written multiple stories include - US QAF (20 years ago), The Walking Dead, and Roswell New Mexico. 

Where you post: Tumblr and AO3. I have posted on LJ, FFN, and Mibba in the past.

Most Popular One-Shot (by kudos) This year: To be clear, I am in no way a popular author. RNM has been a strange fandom to enter, especially having entered at the end of S2. So my most popular one-shot (pre-purge and post-purge) is ‘Day into Night’ with 167 kudos. It was the first fic I published on AO3 back in May. So everything has been downhill since then! I almost want to count ‘this godforsaken mess’ because it has 175 kudos which were mostly gained from the first part. (I entirely regret the second chapter, lol). If we are expanding outside of RNM, my most popular one-shot was a Joe x Nicky fic ‘Deceit’ which has 300 kudos.

Overall: It’s probably a TWD fic, to be honest.  (Again, there’s the Joe x Nicky one-shot.)

Most Popular Multi-Chapter (by kudos) Overall: Absolutely a TWD fic. Maybe even the RPF fic I wrote a few years ago for a friend and buried on the internet where you’ll never find it. My most popular RNM fic got deleted a couple of days ago. It had 302 kudos. I doubt I’ll ever write anything for RNM that gets 300+ kudos ever again. The only reason that one got 300+ kudos is because I wrote it for the prevailing fandom attitude of idolizing Alex while throwing Michael under the bus. That will get you kudos your writing didn’t earn every time. My writing on its own struggles to get 200 kudos. After the purge, ‘Cosmic Clowns’ is the most popular RNM fic at 242 kudos. I’d love for ‘Send Me Home’ to beat ‘Clowns’, but I’m not holding my breath. 

This year: See above.

Favorite story you’ve written so far: Easy. ‘Send Me Home’. It’s self-indulgent and has so many of the things I love in it. Michael-centric, an Alex Michael deserves, baseball, Danny and Lena. I’ve never written AU for any other fandom ever. I’ve always hated them - never even read them. But S2 really sent me down a path away from the shitshow that is canon.

Fic you were nervous to post: Every single one. ‘Send Me Home’ is a mixture of nerves and excitement because I love it so much and any word against it makes me want to never write again. Smut of any kind is hard. The last chapter of ‘Date Nights’ (Alex’s Bed) was scary because I wanted the conversation about Tripp/Nora to be perfect. Plus, it goes against the widely-held fanon opinion that Tripp and Nora are cosmic soulmates. Being an unpopular writer (in terms of kudos, hits) is tough because the mean voice inside your head doesn’t even come close to being quieted by feedback from your readers. 

To be clear, I love the feedback I get! Y’all are so sweet. 

How do you choose your titles?: Lower case titles are generally song lyrics. Upper case stuff I come up with on my own. Sometimes it’s from a line or very specific idea in the story. Other times it’s just nonsense that feels ‘correct’ somewhere in my gut.

Do you outline?: No. I am a sit down and start writing person. A pantser, through and through. I always have the next 2-3 scenes in my head though. If I outlined everything, I would lose momentum because I would feel like the outline was the story and I was done. The energy would whoosh away from me as soon as the last bullet point was complete. My brain is a WILD place.

Complete: I wrote over 100 pieces of Malex nonsense this year. 50 or so remain on AO3. Most of those were ficlets of less than 1k words. 

In-Progress: ‘Send Me Home’ - hoping to complete during the first months of 2021. ‘Date Nights’ - hoping to complete by end of 2020. ‘Whatever Walked There, Walked Alone’ or Ghost!fic - hoping to complete maybe????? It might take me until next Halloween though!

Coming soon/not yet started: Thanks to a group of sweet enablers with great ideas, the Malex neighbors AU where Michael is a romance author is on my list to work on once I complete ‘Send Me Home’. That idea came to me because all of my ideas are dead and gone. I was worried I’d never have another story idea, and so I sat down one day to force myself to think of something. That’s the idea I came up with. And I really like it! 

If I’m being honest, there’s a part of me that wants to retire from writing fic altogether. RNM has so many extremely talented writers that it’s easy to talk myself into leaving the storytelling to them.

Prompts?: Umm...I deleted all the prompts that were in my inbox. Sorry. 

Upcoming work you’re most excited about: Finishing ‘Send Me Home’ is the writing I’m most excited about. The neighbors AU sounds great in theory, but I won’t feel real excitement for it until I start writing and know that I’m capable of telling the story.

Tagging: Anyone and everyone

[adaru32]

The Red Devil’s Chronicles: Jan. 2021 Devil May Cry Updates: Brad V, Collabs, Etc.

Hey, how's it going? Hope you all had a wonderful and safe new year, and hope 2021's been nice to y'all so far. Just a heads up, all of the 2019 journals in my Deviantart group will be deleted any day this year to clean up how many journals there are there, plus feeling that there's no need for older news updates. Here are all of January 2021′s Devil May Cry news updates I’ve compiled: 1. HYDE Defeat music video, featuring Devil May Cry V. b) Speaking of music, Reddit sang Bury The Light. c) Alex Moukala's interview with Casey Edwards about Bury The Light. 2. Hideaki Itsuno teases another game in the works. 3. More updates for the Pinnacle of Combat Mobile game such as: a) Vergil concept. b) Beowulf and Kalina Ann showcase. c) Lady's costume set. 4. Griffon in Devil May Cry V's voice actor Brad Venable passes away. 5. Ali Express is making the Dante and Vergil Asmus Toys figures as their models for dolls' clothing. 6. The CapCom Café event has surfaced again with more amazing winter art. 7. Last Cloudia, featuring Devil May Cry V. 8. All 3 covers for the Visions of V manga series. b) Speaking of which, it's updated again. 9. Journalists have decided to target Dante's voice Reuben Langdon once again by completely taking a Tweet (now deleted) out of context (Full conversation and info on what happened in my Facebook post here).

My Thoughts On These Updates:

1. Lovely stuff we've got goin' on with the music stuff. 2. Wonder what Itsuno's  next project will be? My guesses are Dragon's Dogma 2, Devil May Cry 6, a Devil May Cry game remake, or a new unknown game title. Back in March 2020, there was the update about how a former Platinum Games CEO is collaborating with CapCom on a huge remake project (Could be RE4 Remake or a Devil May Cry one). And back in May 2020, CapCom plans to release major new titles by this year, including celebrating an anniversary of a Devil May Cry game (stated at end of article), it is DMC1's 20th anniversary after all. Only one way to find out. 3. It's about time Yunchang games released more development content for Pinnacle of Combat and not any other promotional work, which is what they've done for awhile. These updates are quite nice. 4. May Brad V rest in peace...It's been a bash hearing him voicing as Griffon in DMCV. It's always heart-breaking hearing the passing of young, talented individuals. 5. Foreign marketplace sites can be so hilarious at times with their advertising. Gotta admit that Dante looks pretty nice in that getup, though. 6. I love the new art work that the CapCom Café's been coming out with as of late. It shows more character with the characters. 7. Never heard of Last Cloudia, but it's nice that the Devil May Cry characters are once again featuring in other game titles. 8. I always enjoy new updates of the Visions of V manga series. Still curious how long it's gonna go on for. It's definitely going longer than the DMC3 manga series did. It sucks that the DMC3 manga didn't finish, but at the same time I feel it's for the best. The concept of that particular series was strange (both story and dialogue-wise), and I feel like the artist got pressured a little too much when it came to deadlines and details, which explains how some of the art work looked a tad unfinished in that one. 9. It makes me upset how low journalists will go to make someone look bad by taking something these celebrities say completely out of context, then twisting their words around to get their fans riled up in an attempt to cancel them. And for what purpose? Glad that article got deleted, because what were they thinking? (You can still see the article's title, even when searching on Google, but when you click on the link the page doesn't exist.) If you talk to Reuben yourself and get to know him, he is one awesome guy despite how some of his views can be questionable. This isn't the only time journalists went after Reuben and twisted his words around to make him look bad (scroll to the Reuben Langdon bit in article). It's really sad that some Devil May Cry fans even believed everything those journalists said, and went as far as saying, "Reuben needs to be canceled for this", or "I don't want him playing as Dante anymore because of this". One of the big elite players even stated on Twitter, "CapCom will cancel Reuben before Cancel Culture gets to him". I really hope nothing bad happens with his career at CapCom. He's a nice addition there, and part of CapCom wouldn't be what they are without him on the team.

[shawnsassymendes]

Hold On I

Warnings: car accident and the things that come along with

Summary: When Shawn finds out that you got into a car accident, he’s too stressed to do anything but write a song. The only thing that calms his nerves, other than you.

A/N: I know that the song is supposed to be about Shawn and his family and how he misses them but when I first heard it, this is what came to mind.

wc: 1.4k

reposting cuz i deleted the original post.

“There’s no way you haven’t made out, you totally have! I don’t believe you!” James said, his face turning red with the anticipation of a new story.

“Well, I don’t care.” Shawn replied, pissed off at the rumors that never left him be. The entire audience went crazy at his sass, and for good reason. 

“Well, why not? Why aren’t you a couple I mean? What’s stopping you?” James replied, coming down from his laughing fit.

“He’s got his eye on someone.” Camila whispered into her mic. 

“What?! Me?! No!” Shawn gasped sarcastically, but his grin betrayed his words. 

“Look at that face! Who is it?” James was practically jumping now.

“I’ll only give you a hint.” Shawn said very calmly, even though his face was bright red thinking about you. 

He lifted his pinky finger and wiggled it.

——-

You laughed as you saw that. That was you and Shawn’s thing. A pinky promise was a part of your secret handshake you made as kids. 

You also found it funny that Shawn said his eyes were on you. Both of you made a promise to get married after the age of 29 so you wouldn’t die lonely.

“Why 29 though?” He asked one day.

“I don’t like the number 29, and I don’t want to be sad that I’m single when I turn 29.” You replied. 

He never stopped mentioning the terrible number after that.

While Shawn said his eyes were on you, you tried to keep your eyes on the road and not think too much about it. It wasn’t like it was a dream of yours that Shawn actually returned your feelings. 

But Shawn could choose from almost anyone he would want, why on earth would he choose you?

———

“That’s it?! No name?!” Yelled James.

“Of course not! That’s way too easy!” Shawn laughed.

———

Shawn shook hands with James as he was leaving the set. He was glad the awkward interview was over and he couldn’t wait to call you to ask if you liked it. 

He had his phone face time you while facing the screens in the editing room. That way you could see what was going on without a TV and before it came out on YouTube. He thought he was a genius when he thought that up. 

“You gonna call her?” Camila asked as she walked up behind him. 

“I thought you knew me!” Shawn scoffed. 

“Well, tell her I said hi and that we should hang out whenever we’re in the same place.” She said as she pulled her coat on. 

“How about you tell her-” Shawn was cut off by his phone ringing. He looked at the screen and saw that it was his dad calling. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion but answered nonetheless.

“Hey dad, what’s up?” He asked kind of hurriedly, for obvious reasons.

“Hey son, where are you?” Manny asked, and Shawn could tell something was wrong by the tone of his father’s voice.

“I’m in the lobby of the studio place. What’s going on?” Shawn’s worried voice caused Camila to be concerned. She put her hand on his shoulder and he looked at her with his brows furrowed.

“I just wanted to check up you.”

“I’m fine, dad. I was just gonna call y/n. Are you sure that’s all you called about?” Shawn asked, knowing his dad well enough to know something was seriously wrong.

“I think you should take a seat, Sha-” 

“Dad, please just tell me what’s going on. You’re stressing me out.” Shawn said. He didn’t mean to cut his father off but he was worried something happened to his mother or his little sister or….or you.

“It’s y/n. She was- She was in a car accident, Shawn.” Manny muttered. 

He didn’t blame his son for cutting him off. He knew he was making him nervous. But he knew that if he told him what was going on, he would lose it. 

Shawn’s breath hitched in his throat as his eyes immediately filled with tears. 

“Shawn? Shawn, stay with me. Everything will be alright. She-” Shawn hung up before he could hear anymore. He would apologize profusely to his dad whenever he was in his right mind, but that wasn’t now. 

“Shawn? What’s going on?” Camila whispered, almost like the volume of her voice would make things worse. 

Shawn took in a deep breath and wiped away at his eyes before he turned to face her and opened his mouth. He didn’t make a noise at first, his eyes darted around the room like crazy thinking about a life without you.

“It-It’s y/n. She’s-She got into a car accident. And she’s all the way back in Ontario and that’s like-that’s like 5 hours away by plane! Fuck!” Shawn was running his fingers through his hair almost viciously. 

After Camila processed what was going on, she took a deep breath and stood up as tall as she could. She would have to be the strong one for the both of them. 

“C’mon.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the exit.

“W-Where are we going?” Shawn sniffled.

“To catch you a flight.” 

———

“How-how did you do that so fast?” Shawn asked Camila in awe. He stared at the plane ticket she shoved in his hands after being at the airport for less than 10 minutes. 

“I’ve got my connections. Now give me your phone.” 

“What?” Shawn’s eyebrows hit the roof.

“Just give me your damn phone Shawn or juro por Dios que te estrangularé!” She seethed at him. She knew she looked scarier when she spoke Spanish angrily and she always used it to her advantage.

“Ok ok, it’s right here!” Shawn said as he pretty much threw his phone at his friend. What made it scarier was that he didn’t understand a word she said. 

She unlocked his phone with ease. “How do you know-” 

“I’m not as innocent as you think I am, Shawn.” Camila mumbled as her eyes were still on his phone. She lifted the phone to her ear and the person she was calling immediately answered. 

“Hey Mr. Mendes, this is Camila. I wish I could explain but there’s not enough time. I got Shawn a flight to Toronto and I wanted to know if you could pick him up when he arrives… I would say be at the airport in about five hours. I’m guessing that none of you are sleeping tonight?… Shawn’s flight is in like 10 minutes… It’s not a big deal, but I gotta go now… Yeah, I know. That’s why I’m doing this sir…Ok, goodbye.” She hung and put Shawn’s phone in his shirt pocket and gave it a little pat. 

“So, some people have noticed that we’re here. And you’re boarding, so good luck, stay safe, tell y/n I love her, and stay strong Shawn. She needs you.” Camila said as she noticed people taking pictures. “I know this is hard-”

Shawn cut her off by pulling her into a bear hug. “Thank you.” He whispered into her hair.

“I’m doing this for y/n, she’s a much better Spanish student.” They both chuckled. “Call me whenever anything happens. And I mean anything.” Camila said as her resolve was breaking. Shawn wiped away a few tears that found their way to her cheeks. 

“She’s never gonna stop thanking you after this.” He chuckled. 

“Same with you, buddy. Now go before they start saying I’m pregnant with your baby.” She hugged him one last time before she sprinted across the airport. 

———

Shawn’s phone was blowing up the entire flight. Andrew was going crazy because he didn’t know that he was leaving the country or where he was going. 

His team found out through tabloids that Shawn was seen at an airport. He was hugging Camila tearfully before leaving for a flight. That’s about all they knew.

The gossip sites had so many theories that would make you think these people had no logic whatsoever. It was from ‘Camila’s pregnant’, which Camila predicted, to ‘they got divorced after a secret marriage and Shawn’s going to live the rest of his days in Sweden from the trauma’.  

Shawn didn’t respond to anything though. All he could think of was you. He kept repeating the words ‘hold on, y/n’ in his head because that was the only thing that was important at the moment.

----

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

[thesunnyshow]

Name: Kim Age: 26 (27 in September) Writing Blog URL(s): @jinterlude​   

Nationality: Filipino-American Languages: English  Star Sign: Virgo MBTI: ISFJ-T Favorite color: Any shade of blue  Favorite food: Ah, I have so many, but I really do love ramen & this Filipino noodle dish my grandma makes. Favorite movie: West Side Story. A close second is Pride & Prejudice (2005) Favorite ice cream flavor: Rocky Road  Favorite animal: Pandas Go-to karaoke song: Upside Down by A*Teens (I think I just dated myself) 

What fandom(s) do you write for? Mainly BTS, but I have written for SVT, EXO, GOT7, Monsta X, B.A.P, & NCT

When did you post your first piece? Oh dang, when? Hmm… I want to say Oct. 2016 (?) on my first blog (I had deleted and came back to Tumblr).

Do you write fluff/angst/crack/general/smut, combo, etc? Why? I mostly write a combo because it just happens that way! My main genres are: fluff, romance, & humor/crack. 

Do you write OCs, X Readers, Ships...etc? I mainly write OCs stories because that’s what makes me the happiest when it comes to writing, but I still write x reader fics for drabbles and oneshots. 

Why did you decide to write for Tumblr? Funny story. The reason why I started writing for Tumblr is because an old group of friends said that I should write a funny story based on a college class of mine, so I did and here we are. 

What inspires you to write? Usually, it’s my imagination, but other times it’s either the song I’m listening to or even the show I’m currently watching. Right now, my inspiration draws from anime. 

What genres/AUs do you enjoy writing the most? Genre wise, I love writing fluff & romance. AUs wise, I’m a sucker for Royal/Royalty. Mafia/Gang & Soulmate AUs would be a close second. 

What do you hope your readers take away from your work? Oh, wow. I honestly never thought about that before. I think for me, the one thing I hope my readers get from my stories is at the end of the day, please do something that will make you happy. Your own happiness should always be a top priority for you. 

What do you do when you hit a rough spot creatively? I take a break! Instead of forcing myself out of the creativity slump, I just take a break and let my mind recharge. Then, I go back to my outline and look over while listening to music that I know will spark some creativity juices. 

What is your favorite work and why? Your most successful? My favorite works (yes, I couldn’t pick just one) are my Royal!AU Seokjin series (Fight for Me & Our Second Chance). I love the amount of time and effort I put into those two stories, and I’m simply in awe at the world and characters I created. My second favorite is my latest Seokjin oneshot, Protecting Each Other. It’s my first story that exceeded 10,000 words, and I’m just proud of how that turned out. Successful wise, I would say it’s, This Little String. It’s a Soulmate!Taehyung oneshot based around the red-string of fate, and every other month, I see someone like and/or reblog it, so I say that’s pretty successful!

Who is your favorite person to write about? Seokjin hands down. I mean, not only is he one of my ultimate biases, but for some reason my creative banks dishes out ideas and inspiration for him like it’s nothing. 

Do you think there’s a difference between writing fanfiction vs. completely original prose? I personally don’t think so. You are still writing original content that derails from the source material (or adds to it), all you have to do is just replace your idols’ name with an original character name, and there you go. What do you think makes a good story? For me, I’d say that if you’re honestly proud of the end product, then that story is good, and your readers will see that. What is your writing process like? First I get an idea, or I like to call it, “it appeared to me in a vision,” then I outline it (if the idea lingers in my brain), and then I start writing and editing. Sometimes I’d sprint with my fellow writers on a server I’m in, and other times, I’d put on music and just let my brain go wild. Most of the time, I’m sprinting with friends. 

Would you ever repurpose a fic into a completely original story? If I had the time, probably. I can see my Royal!AU series becoming an original story with different characters and an expanded plotline. What tropes do you love, and what tropes can’t you stand? I am a sucker for F2L I (friends to lovers)! I just love the idea of dating someone who’s your best friend, so why not date your best friend, if the feelings are mutual of course! As for tropes, I dislike, I can’t say that I have any. I think it’s because (and I feel so bad for this), I don’t really read much stories other than what my mutual friends have written. 

How much would you say audience feedback/engagement means to you? It means the world to me because I do like knowing if I’m doing something right or if I need to go back and edit something for clarity. Mainly, I get likes and reblogs (with no feedback), and while it’s still nice of someone for taking the time to like and reblog something, I would like some feedback, please. I’m still grateful no matter what, though!

What has been one of the biggest factors of your success (of any size)? I think it’s the support of my amazing group of friends/mutuals! It’s thanks to their support that my work is reaching a wider audience, and it just means the world to me that they read my blood, sweat, and tears. I love them so much, especially my close friend, Jey (softjeon on Tumblr)!

Coffee or tea? What are you ordering? For coffee, my go-to is a Caramel Macchiato with Soy Milk (from Starbucks), but lately I’ve been using my Keurig, so I just Peppermint Mocha and 3 tsps of Sugar (I can’t stand bitter coffee lol). For tea, I really like Mango green tea from Gongcha (another boba place chain). 

Dream job (whether you have a job or not)? My dream job is to be an elementary school teacher, however, I am currently working on becoming a social worker where my population will still focus on children/students. So, it’s a good compromise!

If you could have one superpower, what would you choose?  If I could have one superpower, it would be cryokinesis aka ice manipulation!  

If you could visit a historical era, which would you choose? Oh, that’s a tough one, but if I had to choose one, I would go for the 1960s so I can see the Beatles live!

If you could restart your life, knowing what you do now, would you? No, because it’s thanks to those life lessons that I grow up to be who I currently am. Sometimes you have to go through those harsh experiences to be a better version of yourself!

Would you rather fight 100 chicken-sized horses or one horse-sized chicken? One horse-sized chicken, then I can feed my family for months. 

If you were a trope in a teen high school movie, what would you have been? Oh, hands down, I would be the stereotypical geek/nerd. Though, I was called a “preppy” in 9th grade, so that was a first. 

Do you believe in aliens/supernatural creatures? Yup, especially ghosts! 

Fun fact about yourself that not everyone would know? I can say the alphabet backwards! 

Do you think fanfic writers get unfairly judged? Oh, hands down, especially when it comes to writing smut. I’ve seen other blogs condemn writers who write smut about real people, but my thing is that these idols are merely face claims for a character that the author is writing about. 

Do you think art can be a medium for change? I think so! Every artist has a voice, especially with what’s going on recently, we need to be able to use our voices to spread light on certain issues. 

Do you ever feel there are times when you’re writing for others, rather than yourself? I used to think that way, especially when it came to writing x reader inserts since I know that’s what “sells” to the Tumblr audience. Now, I’m perfectly happy with writing x OC stories, and I’m content with my stories getting at least 5 notes. If it breaks 10 notes, then that’s a success!

Do you ever feel like people have misunderstood you or your writing at times? If they did, then I wouldn’t know. Most of the time, I think my writing is okay with people. 

Do your offline friends/loved ones know you write for Tumblr? Yes, my soul friend managed my old blog once upon a time and actually read one of my smuts. I was so embarrassed! But at least he said it was tastefully written, so that’s a bonus? 

What is one thing you wish you could tell your followers? Always remember that it is okay to take breaks/go on hiatus! 

Do you have any advice for aspiring writers who might be too scared to put themselves out there? My advice to those who want to start writing but are too afraid put themselves out there is to simply go for it. I was that person who was afraid to put their writing out there for the world to see, especially with some already established BTS writers on Tumblr, but I went for it. At first, it might be discouraging but know that your mutuals/friends will always be your number one supporter! Use their support as a motivator to keep writing and finding your groove! Then, eventually, all of your readers will start trickling in and showering you with the love and support you deserve!

Are there any times when you regret joining Tumblr? I wouldn’t say regret joining but more like allowing my life to be revolved around it. At one point in my life, it felt like a second job/chore for me, and Tumblr should never be that type of site! 

Do you have any mutuals who have been particularly formative/supportive in your Tumblr journey? Oh, I have so many! The ones that come to mind are definitely Jey (softjeon), Beanie (jinned), Nina (j-sope), Kenz (parksfilter), Renae (mygsii), Atlas (astraljoon), & Niah (randomkoalablog) to name a few! I love these amazing people so much and cherish their friendship to the moon and back!

Pick a quote to end your interview with: "Around here, however, we don’t look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things, because we're curious … and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths." - Walt Disney

[tjkiahgb]

On August 13th, 2018, at 8:20 PM, TJ Kippen performed a basketball-themed apology rap for Buffy Driscoll and completed his redemption arc. In doing so, he became a full and complete hashtag good boi and fulfilled this blog’s ridiculous destiny.

This post is scheduled to go up on August 13th, 2019, at 8:20 PM. It only feels right that I retire this blog on the one year anniversary of that moment.

Okay. It’s not that dramatic. I’m not deleting my account or logging out forever or anything. I’ll be around. I’ll check in and like some posts and hang out like the kid who graduated high school but won’t leave. He keeps coming back and acting chummy with the teachers and it’s like, doesn’t he have better stuff to do?

The point is, my queue is depleted, my drafts are empty. I don’t have a shift in fandoms planned. I don’t have anything planned. It’s time for me to turn my attention to other things and stop thinking about this show and writing about it and working on this blog.

So that’s basically the tl;dr of this whole deal. I’m going to write some rambling personal stuff so if you don’t care, which most people probably won’t, then thanks for reading and thanks for all the memories. It’s been fun.

Okay, lemme ramble. And if you’ve read this blog for a while, you’ve probably heard some of this already, but whatever, this is my goodbye post.

Way back in October of 2017, I came across a post on a website for TV news that said “Disney Channel to Feature Its First Gay Main Character in Andi Mack Season 2″. I didn’t know what Andi Mack was, and I hadn’t watched Disney Channel in well over a decade. I remembered reading about the two moms on Good Luck Charlie when it happened, but I also remembered that it was, you know, mostly nothing. A lot of controversy for what was just a quick little thing. But this headline noted that it was a Main Character. And I’m reading the article and it’s talking about how he’s going to have this journey in season two and the producers had talked to GLAAD and other groups to get it right, and I’m like, wow, this is pretty cool, this really seems like they’re putting some respect into this. (I’m also thinking about how much young, closeted me would’ve killed for something like this.)

So I set my DVR to record it not knowing what to expect. Mostly thinking it was just going to be your standard Disney Channel show: cheesy and corny and bad jokes, but I’ll catch the coming out scene and it’ll be cool to see how they handle it and that’ll probably be that.

And then I’m watching the episode and I’m like, this is... not bad? In fact, more than not bad, this is way better than it has any right to be. And then I got to the coming out scene, which was so well done, and I’m just... shocked. This is like Pixar. Like, it’s for kids, but I can watch it as an adult and pick up on themes and subtleties. This is not like the shows from my childhood. Where was this show when I was growing up?

Next thing I know I’m watching the next episode. And the next one. And I’m starting to care for these characters. I can forgive a lot of issues with plot if I care about the characters and what this show did, maybe as well as any show on television, is made you care for the characters, from top to bottom.

So now I’m watching the show regularly. At some point, I went back and binged through season one on DisneyNow. I’m in, as a casual viewer at this point at least.

And then I get to 2.11, and the swing scene happens, and I watch it wordlessly, and it ends, and I feel like I’m losing my mind. I could not believe what I just saw. I thought for sure this show was just going to have a couple of coming out scenes and that would be the end of it. Had I really just watched a scene that was hinting at a gay romance?

I wanted so badly to talk about it with someone else to see if they were seeing what I was seeing, but, as you may not be surprised to learn, none of my adult friends were watching Andi Mack. So I started looking around online. And I eventually found my way here, to this site, to the tag. And people were seeing what I was seeing. And people were excited about it, and I was like, okay, cool, I might’ve found my community.

So I started lurking around here. And I would check in after 2.12 and 2.13, and I was really starting to enjoy it. Most of the stuff I watch that I care about I’ll watch with friends or family and talk about it with them, so I never really thought being a part of a fandom would be worthwhile. Plus, I’d hear about shipping wars and other nonsense like that, and I’m like, I’m not going to make an account to argue with people over fictional characters’ relationships.

But what I was finding about this community was that it was more positive than that. There were arguments, sure. You’re going to get them in any group of people. But for the most part, people just seemed happy. They were posting theories and memes and gifs and jokes and fanfics. And they were celebrating the characters and developments. I don’t know if that’s special to the Andi Mack fandom or not, but it seemed special to me.

That’s around when I started thinking about making an account, during that hiatus between 2A and 2B. But I was like, do I want to commit to this? What’s the point of my account? What do I want to say? And at some point in the hiatus, I was checking the tag, and I saw a gifset. It was by an account, since deleted and gone, but who, at the time, was very prominent in the fandom. And the gifset was all about attacking Tyrus. It was trying to take everything nice about what had happened between TJ and Cyrus and stomp on it. Tyrus was like a little baby ship at this point. People were just starting to get into it, the numbers weren’t that big. There wasn’t even really a name for the ship back then. The Tyrus tag was mostly that professional wrestler and the CJ tag was even worse. And this account had decided they were going to use their platform to try and make this small group of people in the fandom feel bad about liking their ship. I just remember thinking, why? Why be like that? It just seemed so unnecessary. And for the briefest of moments, I thought, okay, maybe I’ll make an account to be a troll and argue this stuff. And then I was like, nah, that’s just going to make the tag worse. When you see someone trying to ruin things for other people, you can give them attention and power, or you can just do your own thing.

So what I decided to do instead was to make an account that would add to the positivity I had been seeing. To just be one of the many voices doing fun stuff to drown out the bad. I could put out dumb posts to hopefully make people laugh, or eventually start writing recaps to give people something to do after watching the episode. There wasn’t really any bigger goal than that. Kill some time while celebrating the show and making the tag a more fun place, if only incrementally.

I’d like to think I did that. That I haven’t written or made too many things that have bummed people out and that most of my posts have hopefully made things better for people who wanted to hang out on here and talk about the show.

That’s all. At the end of everything, that was all. Just try to leave a net-positive wherever you go.

So that’s why I joined tumblr. Here’s why I stayed.

I am an unemployed writer. I’m an employed something else, but I would like to be an employed writer and I am currently not. And what that really means is I’m an unread writer. It means I write stuff and I try to convince people to read it and buy it, but most of the time they don’t. Most of the time, my stuff sits around waiting and hoping to be read. And when that’s the case, you can start to feel doubt.

What I didn’t realize when I started this account was that I would also be getting positivity back. I mean, I probably should have. It was the whole reason I started this, because I liked the positivity here. I guess I just didn’t expect it to be returned to me.

But it has. It has tremendously. Just writing this silly stuff that I do and putting it out there and getting feedback on it has meant so much to me. People saying something I’ve written is funny or interesting or just saying that they enjoyed it is such a confidence boost. You feel like, okay, people like my jokes or the way I think or whatever. There’s an audience for me somewhere. People who will get me. I just need to stick with it.

That’s what you all have been for me this last year and a half. More than just making this a fun place to share our love of this show, you’ve made this a place for me to feel seen.

I try not to tie too much of my self-esteem to the amount of interaction my posts get. (Seriously, don’t do that, it can be really unhealthy. I’m like, if a post flops, it flops. No biggie. Move on to the next one.) But every note I do get on something I’ve written lets me know I’ve done something right. The reblogs, the likes, the follows, the nice messages in my inbox, the comments on the posts. Any of it. All of it. It lets me know I’ve been read. It makes me feel like I’ve made a connection. And that means the world to me.

So thank you, to any and all of you who participated in this thing with me. Thank you for reading. Thank you for being a part of my experience on here. Thank you for being so cool that I wanted to join your group in the first place and thank you for being so great afterwards that I’m eternally happy I did.

It’s meant more to me than you could possibly know.

Keep the positivity.

- Jay

[crusty]

I know there's not much I can do to fix the fandoms I'm in, but airing out my issues with it currently usually helps. I know I've been all over the place the past couple years and I've said some dumb shit, but I've been trying my best to make some real changes in how I think fandom should be. Now, when I'm at fault I apologize. It's more honorable to apologize when you've wronged someone than to be prideful and continue to spout shit outta your mouth like a leaky, rotten faucet.

I know sometimes my image can be misconstrued, and people might just see me as just a loud rude asshole, but in actuality... I'm a loud rude asshole who still cares a LOT about his friends, mutuals, and the kids/teens in the fandom that get kicked around by all the dickbags who think they're tough shit.

A lot of discourse happening nowadays is trying to split everyone up, even if we all have many things in common. The internet is a LOT bigger than it was in the past, and a lot of adults on here ain't too keen on sharing it. They'll blame the kids and their parents for shit instead of being a responsible adult and just being respectful.

Minors in fandom learn from us. If anything I want my page and my content to be open to people 13+.

All of my adult content I usually never post now because either it's not allowed on the site, or I post it under some other name. You know, like a responsible adult should do.

As for fandom drama, stay out of it if it isn't your business. If it BECOMES your business, talk to someone you trust about it. As the internet becomes more hostile, sometimes it's hard to know who's really your friend and who's... Not. We shouldn't be scared to stand up for others, and if you're the type of person to let your friend be harassed by some fuckwad with like 6k followers, then you suck too for not sticking up for them.

The internet shouldn't be like you're in middle school, or high school, with petty locker room drama. Utilize your tools. Block. Mute. Take note of toxic users who do nothing but bring you down and block them. Block their friends too if you have to. People with similar views stick together.

Breaking away from the status quo is. Difficult. It can be really hard to lose mutuals and friends who turned out not to like you as much because you don't have a big following, or a loud enough voice. But once you do break away, you'll meet others who did the same. Those people are your real friends.

TLDR; My main rules for the internet and being in fandom are as follows:

1. Be respectful of others' boundaries. Do this in multiple ways; adults, respect young users who arnt comfy with adults. Respect young users who are, and set necessary boundaries between yourselves. Be a good role model.

Kids, respect adults being adults in their spaces, you'll get there someday too. Also kids, watch over your friends. Make sure they're not straying away too far where they shouldn't.

2. Respect others' opinions. Harmless opinions of course, like if someone hates your fav, who cares! Its fiction, they're not killing you. Ships don't really matter in real life. Learn to step away from the internet if its stressing you out. Agree to disagree. You can be friends and not like the same things! It's called not being a jerkass!

3. BLOCK BLOCK BLOCK! Use your block/mute/kick etc features to curate your feed to your liking. Someone pissing you off with their constant negativity ? You can try talking to them, but you arnt obligated to. Block them! Boom. You feel so much better. Mute and block words related to things you dislike,hate,squick or trigger you. Feels good too. See someone being suspicious or creepy? Block them. Tell your friends.

4. Have fun. Just be yourself! Cringe culture is bullshit, so do what makes you happy. You'll find friends and good times. Ignore anon hate, delete it! I wish I did LOL

Anyways, that's it for now. I had a lot on my mind, and needed to get this out. If this helps you? GOOD. If you're troubled and need to talk to someone, send me a dm. I've dealt with plenty of childhood bullying, adult bullying, and online harassment. From someone who gets it, I'll help as much as I can. Thanks.

[alicentsgf]

i feel like with the rise of skywalker coming out soon i just want to talk about this now, before the moment passes.

i dont know how many of my current followers were around for or are aware of that weird couple of years where rey skywalker believers and rey solo 'truthers' were pitted against each other for some strange reason? but, to recap: my rey solo theories got thousands of notes overnight. my main one got reposted on facebook half a million times. peter mayhew put it on his personal page. i made a thousand fucking dollars in commission in one month! at one point i had over twice as many followers as i had posts. i had more attention than i had ever bargained for.

but i Loved making the theories so damn much so i kept writing them. i just didn't know how to deal with the negative reaction; i played it really chill at the time - internalising that 'dont let them see you bleed' mentality.

i didnt want them to know they hurt me for a long time but i've changed my mind - now i do.

in the years between TFA and TLJ i had a seemingly small but semi-dedicated hate following who used to gather on various sites and talk shit about me like they knew me... basically just say hurtful bullshit. i guess they maybe thought i would never see it but didnt seem to care either way whether i did or not. after all, they never censored my url or anything. it encouraged hate - since they named me specifically so often their followers/friends would follow their lead and come be awful in my inbox. my own followers would link me to it, and i know they were just trying to warn me or something but honestly i didnt want to be warned, i wanted to be ignorant.

i was only 17 when TFA came out and grown adults were suddenly publically shit talking me and encouraging their followers to tell me i was delusional and stupid and to shut up.

it made me so paranoid. i was essentially a child and only 3 months out of a serious depressive episode when it all started so i wasn't really emotionally equipped to deal with it. especially not at the volume at which it came.

i got threatened. i honestly thought they might dox me. i eventually deleted all my selfies and any overtly specific personal stuff but it was so hard to be sure i got it all especially since once something gets reblogged on here its out of your hands forever. so i lived in and out of this kinda paranoid state. i was out as Bi on here and not to my family and suddenly there was this group who hated me and threatening me who knew something so intimate about me. And Then (irony) people came after me saying i was faking being the age i was bc i had nothing proving it ? that was fun. i knew i couldn't prove myself without exposing myself and that lead to the worst panic attack i had over the whole thing.

So, about my theory and where it is now, because i still get asks: It no longer exists publically and hasnt for almost 2 years. I didn't so much delete it as Let it get taken down by the news site hosting it. its still on my computer somewhere but honestly i didn't and don't want the conversation started up again properly because i know what it came with. i got asked so many times to update the theory for TLJ but the fact that TLJ allowed me and my theory to be forgotten was kinda a relief. i did a podcast called 'The Fordcast' around the time i was feeling really awful and i used to find it so embarrassing to play back because you can just Hear in my voice how broken i was discussing the topic by that point - this was in the months before TLJ came out. its awful but on some level i think at the time i was glad TLJ was shit? it gave me a good reason to take a big step back from the fandom.

the Only thing that ever made any of the hate worth it was the support i had from other fans and the discussions i had with them on this blog. i used to constantly tag how much i Loved this little community who sent me nice, interesting asks and like Shit i meant it - that was the main reason i kept on posting for a long time. so thank you. thank you so much if you were one of those people.

most of the indviduals who participated in and encouraged the hate against me are still pretty prominent on tumblr (f not in the star wars fandom anymore) and im not about to start shit. it was over two years ago. i never have and never will name names.

i know they probably dont and never have given me a second thought, but they, at least in part, ruined something i loved for me. i dont know if they'll ever see this but i wish they would because i want them to realise i wasnt some faceless unfeeling theory generator, no matter how prolific my theories were. i was an 17/18 yr old kid who was very aware of the nasty shit they were saying about me and it had a very real impact on my life.

[justfandomwritings]

Hey, I was just wondering if you will be continuing the magneto fic? I understand if you aren’t going to. But I was just wondering with all the stuff that happened around it.

I frequently get upset with readers over the lack of support shown to myself and other writers on this website. Often times, I share posts which express that discontent, and frequently I add my voice to those posts in ways that I feel contribute to the discussion and show readers how harmful that lack of support can be to writers mentally and emotionally. Sometimes, I am even the creator of these posts, particularly when I come upon readers who do not comment/reblog yet still ask me when I will update, tell me to add them to my taglists, or even in some cases act as though they are entitled to the next chapter of a story. Occasionally, when I can be certain that an anon is involved in the general lack of support shown to authors or if I am aware of a specific incident, I don’t bother with the time it takes to entertain whatever compliment is being thrown my way by someone who isn’t willing to publicly comment or give credit where it’s due to the work they enjoyed. 

That agitation is, I feel understandably, compounded after I lose friends to the kind of behavior and entitlement frequently exhibited by some readers of fanfiction on this website. In recent days, weeks, and months, I have been forced to watch a number of my dearest friends give up on tumblr or give up on writing entirely either because the lack of support was just too disheartening to bother with or because, despite my protests, they had been led by readers’ consumption without credit to believe they were not talented enough to warrant reading. 

And while people who’ve been around my blog for a long time will remember the days I was an apologist for readers and defended their inaction and gave them the benefit of the doubt, age has made me a wiser individual, and I no longer make excuses for that behavior. 

The specific incident you’re referring to was between myself and two anons after I posted my Magneto fic. 

I have had multiple fics in a row at this point which I was hoping to continue perform incredibly poorly compared to past fics I have posted in those fandoms and generally in comparison to the number of followers I have in those fandoms. As I’ve always said, I write for me but I post for you guys. So, I’ve finished writing them because I enjoy writing, but I haven’t taken the time to format and post them because I don’t want to waste my time on that sort of thing. 

I followed those up with a Magneto fic; I had put out a call a few months ago for Magneto requests and got a rash of responses, so in general it was something I felt fine about. 

The first anon sent me an excited compliment about how they could not wait for part two and genuinely enjoyed part one. At the time, that Magneto fic had been up for several hours and only had 6 notes, all of which were likes. This assured me that that anon had not reblogged my post despite seemingly enjoying it. 

To which, I responded pointing out this discrepancy. I didn’t intend that to be a targeted attack at that person, more a PSA that “Hey, sending asks anonymously on my blog where people will already see the fic does nothing to actually give me credit for this thing you got for free and enjoyed.” 

Clearly, to that individual, my message did not come across that way, because that person came off anon to inform me that they had only found my blog that day and because of that Magneto fic and I believe the quote was, “I guess you don’t want a follow then.” 

While I generally don’t think that being new to a blog is an excuse that gets you out of supporting an author, especially if you feel a fic was worthy of following said author, I can see how, if they felt attacked by my post, that person wouldn’t have done so after. 

I take full responsibility if my post came off rude, and I did attempt to explain the situation to that individual when they messaged me off anon. Given that they have not responded to it, I cannot be sure if said explanation was sufficient or forgiven. What I can tell you is that that person is still following me and did not reblog the Magneto fic before or after I posted a response to their message. It’s all fair in my book.

What’s not fair, is the second anon who injected themselves into the situation. I am assuming that the hateful third ask was not from the same individual as the first two, because no one in their right mind would respond to an open explanation of the situation by turning around and vehemently attacking a person, that’s crazy. So I am begging the question of who the second individual is if they felt entitled to butt in to a conversation they were not part of and were aware the original anon was agitated by my response.

“Clearly the only thing that matters to you is numbers and since that one doc didn’t get a satisfactory number you should just delete your whole blog because you don’t deserve followers if you treat them like that. So how does zero followers sound?“

A) The only thing that matters to me is that fic authors, whether that be myself or my friends, do not lose their passion for writing because of the behavior of others. I assure you my posts do not generally get enough support for me to base my contentment on notes. I doubt any author’s posts get enough notes to base their contentment off of them. 

B) Regarding how I treat my followers, maybe my message to the first anon could have been misconstrued as rude, but it was by no means abusive towards that individual, which this anon is being.

C) Even if numbers were all that mattered to me, why does that matter to you? Why does what I value give anyone the right to take advantage of my hard work and effort? If an author only cared about notes, how would that excuse anyone from giving credit to an author who put blood, sweat, and tears into creating free content for you. 

Readers often use this defense for their behavior, and frankly it’s pathetic, moronic, and downright insulting. “Oh God, you only care about the notes.” No, no author cares about the notes. Notes don’t matter at all, but what they represent does matter. What authors care about is being appreciated for the hard work they’ve put in for you, and notes are how you show that appreciation on tumblr, and reblogs are how you give credit to that author for the FREE entertainment you received. 

D) I don’t think most readers realize how much hate writers get. We get hate from the rest of the world, from people who don’t like fanfiction, from people who don’t understand fanfiction, fro other writers, from other fandoms, from readers who don’t like our writing, from readers who don’t like our plot, from readers who don’t like our character choices. We are baraged with so much hate when all we’re doing is something we love, and we’re doing it for free for other people to enjoy. If I could go back to zero followers without losing all the rest of the work I’ve put into this blog over half of a decade, then I would take it in a heartbeat because with followers come people like this and buckets and buckets of hate. 

E) I’ve seen this wording before in messages, and it does make me wonder if it’s the same anon. 

Ages ago now (or it feels like ages ago, because after lots of work I managed to let that one go), I got almost word for word the exact same message except with the words “kill yourself” replacing “delete your whole blog”. 

Whether this anon is that same individual or not, I cannot be sure as tumblr no longer allows you to block anons to my knowledge. What I can be sure of is that if your message reminds someone of a time they were told to commit suicide, you’re probably in the wrong. 

...

All of that said, I don’t hold any ill will towards the individual who came off anon and spoke with me. While I still disagree with not supporting writers, that blog is just one of many who didn’t reblog but enjoyed it. 

The second anon and I have issues, and normally I would cut my losses, delete my replies to their post, and delete the fic. But this time I’m not going to do that. In part, because this individual’s logic is so far afield, I think they’re crazy. In part, because that anon made an issue of my response to something and not the fanfiction itself. In part, because I’m actually holding out hope that person will come off anon and talk to me like the first one did. 

But largely because I have let readers and followers make demands of me, trounce over me, push me around, make me feel guilty about nothing, and generally treat me like garbage for so long that I just can’t do that anymore. I don’t think I could keep writing if I let one more person walk over me like a door mat. I’ve been writing on here or other sites for a decade now. I’ve had my fill of being the spineless, non-confrontational, non-controversial, supportive blog. 

So the fic stays up. Whether I finish it on tumblr or not remains to be seen. But even if it’s not posted here, it will be finished on AO3 (It is there under the same title and the same account name. I will let everyone here know if I make the decision to only upload it there.)

Thank you very much for asking. That was probably a much longer response than you thought you were in for, so I’m sorry about that. I just thought I’d take the opportunity to explain.

Hope you have a lovely day my dear! 

[mornyavie]

Indigenous Languages Challenge #2: Proto-Algonquian

(see bottom of post for a quick introduction to language families and proto-languages, if you’re not familiar with my terminology here.)

Name of the language is Proto-Algonquian; since we have no record of this language actually existing, we don’t know what its speakers might have called themselves, though we could guess. Looking at the root of the Wôpanâak word hutuwôk (”that [language] which they can speak to each other”), from the first post I made in this series, we might guess that it’s related to *eϴketoᐧmakatwi, the verb “speak,” but I haven’t found any writings on this yet. The word “algonquian” itself may descend from a Maliseet word, elakómkwik, meaning “they who are our allies/relatives,” whose root I haven’t been able to find.

Basic Information - We get to Proto-Algonquian by pulling back from Wôpanâak to look at the entire Algonquian language family; this is sometimes subdivided into Plains Algonquian (such as Blackfoot / Siksiká), Central Algonquian (such as Ojibwe / Ojibwemowin / Anishinaabemowin), and Eastern Algonquian (such as Wôpanâak), but we can argue for a while about how the sub-groups should actually be split up. (There are many more in the Algonquin language family than I’ve listed here, of course).

History - Of course, much like we don’t have direct record of Proto-Algonquian, we don’t have direct record of who its speakers were; however, based on the geography and history of the groups in the language family, its guessed that they were a largely settled group in the central-south Canada area; northeast of the Great Lakes. Part of the point of this challenge is to recognize indigenous people and languages as living and existent, not historical curiosities, which I’m already stretching by talking about proto-languages, so instead of continuing to tell you about that, I’ll give you a little information on those two randomly-chosen subgroups I mentioned above, excluding Wôpanâak since I already talked about it.

The Blackfoot Confederacy (Niitsitapi or Siksikaitsitapi) describes four groups in Montana and in southwestern Canada. They were originally nomadic inhabitants of the Great Plains area. There’s several strong language revitalization and education movements among the Blackfoot Confederacy. The Piegan Institute, founded by Darrell Robes-Kipp, supports several immersion schools; and Montana radio station KBWG broadcasts shows in the language.

The Ojibwa or Chippewa (this is still a wide group, and there are so many different names for them, based on exact langauge, dialect, and area, that there’s an entire wikipedia article List of Ojibwa ethnonyms) are an Anishinaabe people and members of the Council of Three Fires; they live largely in an area I can best describe as south-middle-eastern Canada, north of the Great Lakes and sweeping a bit east and west, as well as a bit south into the United States. In 2001 an Ojibwe-language school, Waakoododaading (”the place where we help each other”) was founded by a community effort in Wisconsin; there were many people involved, but some of the original founders still working with the school are Keller Paap and Lisa LaRonge.

Linguistic revitalization - Algonquian has been one of the more heavily studied of the American language families; a first attempt at its reconstruction was published by one Leonard Bloomfield in the early 1900s, not long after Proto-Indo-European obtained a widely accepted form. A dictionary of Proto-Algonquian was published here (x) by the Algonquian Dictionaries Project, a subsidiary of the Algonquian Linguistic Atlas. The dictionary project makes available here (x) many resources on Algonquian languages; the Atlas also offers great resources for learning and use of these languages, such as fonts, conversation audios and manuals, and this super neat “terminology forum” (x) with common and important phrases.

Support - I wasn’t able to find an active donation site for Waakoododaading, and the Algonquian Dictionaries Project is an academic project which gains funding through grants, not donations, but...

Support the Piegan Institute here!

Linguistic Information:

Phonology - As we saw with Wôpanâak , voicing / aspiration were not phonemic in Proto-Algonquian. The consonant inventory is a bit restricted as a result, but, notably, there’s a palatal or post-alveolar series as well as alveolar (again, as in Wôpanâak). The language did have at least one approximant/trill in the form of /l/, or /ɹ/. And, like Wôpanâak, there are four basic vowels and a length distinction, though nasalization was probably not phonemic. Like its daughter language, Proto-Algonquian was likely distinctive for its abundance of multi-vowel and semivowel-vowel syllables.

Morphology - Again, like Wôpanâak (and like many proto-languages), Proto-Algonquian is pretty heavily marked. It heavily uses a proximate-obviative distinction - much like the difference between “this” and “that,” this is the distinction between an object/person who is close to / part of / more relevant to the conversation, vs. one who is far away / not participating / less relevant. The distinction is used with pronouns to keep track of third person referents (as if you were referring to this-he and that-he, instead of leaving it unclear who a particular “he” refers to), for instance.

Syntax - I wasn’t able to find a ton on the syntax of Proto-Algonquian (it’s even more difficult to reconstruct grammars than phonologies, and heavily-marked languages tend towards less rigid syntax anyways), so, in interest of getting this posted, I will refrain from trying to find and get an interesting factoid from a paper on Proto-Algonquian syntax.

Vocabulary - Like Wôpanâak, many Algonquian languages have lent words to English / American terms and place-names. From Massachusetts, which we saw before, to Michigan (mishigamaa, Ojibwe “big water”), to animals such as moose and woodchucks (from Cree otchek or Ojibwe otchig, altered to match “wood” [now you know how much wood a woodchuck can chuck: none]), and even the word tuxedo (named for the town the style originated in, which in turn took its name from a Munsee-langauge place-name).

Information from one of the listed sources, Wikipedia, World Atlas of Language Structures, Online Etymology Dictionary, etc.

In case you don’t know what I’m talking about here, a “proto” language is one for which we have no record (living speakers or writings), but which we can reconstruct based on the similarities of languages we do know about. A proto-language is constructed for a language family, a set of languages that we know are related because of similarities in their words and grammars. Roughly speaking, this means comparing words we think are related, and hypothesizing an ancestor word which can produce all of the descendants via regular sound changes; of course, it tends to get a lot more complicated than that might sound.

Often, because of the relatively short history of written language, more than one proto-language can be constructed in the history of a language family; the Algonquin language family is itself part of the Algic family (unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, linguistics haven’t followed biologists in the order-phylum-class-etc-etc classification, so everything’s a family of different sizes), along with Wiyot and Yurok, and we have another reconstructed language, Proto-Algic, from which they all descend.

As an example, Wikipedia helpfully provides the word for “woman” in many Algonquin languages; a random sample of them is okwéew, iskwew, and aakííwa. Clearly related, right? The hypothesized root for these is *eϴkweᐧwa; so the major changes we have are deleting /ϴ/ (the sound at the end of “with”) or replacing it with /s/ (if this seems improbable, considered how often non-native speakers pronounce English “the” like “ze;” the two sounds are, by linguistic standards, quite similar), and messing about with the vowels. If I had the time and energy to pull up more words and roots, we’d expect to see regular correspondences between languages, like “o,” “i,” and “aa” appearing in the same word.

As a note, reconstructed words are generally marked with * to indicate that they aren’t actually attested.

[banditthewriter]

Something I’ve been thinking about regarding about my place in the fandom.

I’ve been thinking about my place a lot lately, as you well know. Hence me disappearing recently. I don’t know what started the thought process, but I think I finally put it in words when I was talking to Le tonight on our date so I wanted to share it here too?

I made a comment to someone that I felt like I was taking up space in the fandom and the more I thought about that, I think that’s exactly what I do. I feel more like a trespasser. I’m in the fandom(s) and I put out a fair amount of writing but what do I give back? I don’t read people’s stuff as much as I should, I don’t comment like I should, I don’t rec people or work that I enjoy as much as I should. I just stay in my own little corner and write. How many of you guys have really noticed that I was gone outside of my message saying I was going? 

And there are so many amazing writer’s on this site, in these fandoms. I’m lucky enough to be acquainted with some of them. They are all so amazing and whenever I go get around to reading their work, I’m always blown away. And then I read mine and it’s just... not the same quality at all. I want to write so much and I’m constantly putting out work after work and I know that that makes my work suffer but... it’s what I’m known for, right? I post so much work that people are impressed, but when you get down to it? It’s quantity over quality.

And then I have all these ideas swirling in my head and I can’t even talk to people about them because I feel like the moment I put them out into the world, someone else will get inspired to write it. And that’s great, really, I never get tired of reading the same thing, but I just know that it’ll be better than what I’ll write and then what’s the point? I’ll just be making an even bigger fool of myself for trying. So I hoard my ideas and hope that somehow they are unique enough that someone else won’t write it before I get to it and then have to scrap the whole thing.

Am I jealous? Yes. I wish I could write the way that the other people in the fandom does. I don’t want to tag people in this because it’s just me whining, but there are so many amazing writers that make you go “holy shit, this was amazing, I can talk about this for days, I’ll think about this weeks later” and then my stuff is... oh! Perfect analogy for my work? It’s a firework. Sure, big flash and loud boom, draws your eyes at first. But then it fizzles and it’s gone and you wait for the next one.

You all deserve more than mediocre but I feel like that’s kind of where I’ve settled. I look at my novel and how beautiful some of the prose is, how detailed it is, and I wonder why I can’t do that with my fics. Why they always come out like someone reading stage directions in a monotone voice.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m lazy or too excited to get to the next part or the fucking brain damage that makes me unable to string the lines together in a way that resonates. In a way that makes you go “that’s the line I’ve been waiting for” or something that just makes you have to take a breath.

This site, writing this past year and a half? It saved me so much. I was going through life as a ghost and now I get excited to write and interact, but I feel like it’s all tainted with the fact that it’s just not that good. I’ve met so many amazing people that I never would have met without this fandom and I can just hope that I’ve made some sort of impact on them. 

I don’t want to stop writing because I enjoy it, but at what point do I have to accept the fact that I’m just taking up space? Space where other people, amazing writers, could be? Space for the fics that people just stand in awe of the moment they read them?

I thought if I admitted it to myself, maybe it’d be easier to admit to you all, but I’ll admit to getting a little choked up writing this. It’s hard to face the fact that you’re not as special as you thought you were ha. And I’m not saying all this for pity or to have people come “poor baby” be, I just... felt like I needed to say it. At least once. And maybe I’ll delete this post tomorrow when I’m feeling a little less fuzzy. I guess we’ll have to see.

To put it simply, I’m not done writing, but that’s just because I’m selfish. I’ll keep writing in the hopes that one day I won’t feel like I’m taking up space. I’ll keep posting so that I may one day earn the little corner that I’ve tried to carve out for myself in this fandom. 

Until then... just consider me banditthetrespasser.