#I’ve been thinking about them since October
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ervikirvi · 3 days ago
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Do you guys think “You look beautiful honey” was the last thing Kinger said to Queenie? As he looked up at the amalgamation that looked back at him in Queenie’s room (probably), he didn’t see a monster, he saw his wife. He looked up at her with nothing but love, amazed at the flashing lights and hypnotic eyes. Like a moth to a flame
Do you think Queenie would react the same way if it was Kinger who abstracted? Do you guys think that as she sits in the cold, dark cellar, she holds onto the last memory she had of her husband? Do you guys think that she regrets abstracting? Because of not feeling loved by Kinger? Only for her last moments with him being Kinger looking up at her, eyes full of love and he says to her, “You look beautiful honey”. And then in the pillow-fort, he reaches out and puts his hand on her cheek, looking at her with worry and sadness in his eyes.
Do you think that’s when she realized she was loved? And that she was loved that entire time? Do you think she saw his pupils expand when he saw her? Do you think she saw his realization of what happened? And that he’ll probably never see her again? Separated, like pieces on a chessboard
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justinspoliticalcorner · 19 hours ago
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Noah Berlatsky at Everything Is Horrible:
As I’ve mentioned a time or two, the ADL has disgraced itself by falling to its knees before fascist oligarch Elon Musk. After Musk gave a Nazi salute at the inauguration, the ADL issued a statement claiming that the Nazi salute was not a Nazi salute but just “an awkward gesture in a moment of enthusiasm.” I’ve explained at some length why Musk is in fact a Nazi piece of shit. Just as some have claimed that Musk didn’t know what he was doing when he sieg heiled, some argue that the ADL acquiescence means that they, and their CEO Jonathan Greenblatt, have been fooled or made fools of. The ADL has been tricked or hoodwinked by MAGA and by Musk; they cannot see what is right in front of them. The ADL’s statement was certainly foolish. And Jonathan Greenblatt appears to have roughly the intellectual heft of a rotten cabbage infested with some toxic mix of fungus and worms. At the same time, I do not think it’s exactly right to say that the ADL was fooled, just as it’s not exactly right to say that people, in general, voted for Trump because they were fooled by algorithms or by fascist propaganda. Or, to put it another way, when people are fooled by transparent fascist nonsense, the failing is not (just) intellectual. It is moral. People listen to fascists because they want to; they believe fascist propaganda because they think doing so is advantageous, or because they want an excuse to embrace their worst selves. We should be angry at liars, and we should have compassion for people who are fooled by liars and scammers. But providing cover for Elon Musk, or voting for Trump—that’s not being bamboozled. That’s being a collaborator.
[...]
The ADL has also taken a hard right turn in the last few years, and especially since the October 7 Hamas attack and massacre, and the subsequent Israeli mass slaughter of Gazans. Greenblatt, and his donors, have decided that they no longer care about the organization’s historic mission of tracking and fighting far right organizing in the US. To the horror of many staffers, the org appears to now believe (like Netanyahu) that its only enemies are on the left, and that the only real antisemitism is criticism of Israel. The ADL is committed to a narrative in which Musk is harmless. Greenblatt doesn’t want to believe that Musk is a bad actor, because he wants to work with Musk and Trump to pursue genocide and ethnic cleansing abroad and to silence leftists at home. Greenblatt is willing to occasionally and gently chide Musk for not being sufficiently serious about the Holocaust, as in his recent pushback when Musk posted a series of Nazi puns. But Greenblatt has a deep and abiding interest in pretending that Musk is not a violent far right antisemite. And so, when Musk sieg heils, Greenblatt scurries around to throw sand in his own eyes. Musk hasn’t fooled him. He has fooled himself, because he wants to work with Nazis to do Nazi stuff—like murdering Palestinians and crushing the left.
The once-sterling ADL’s reputation has been declining in recent years, thanks to Jonathan Greenblatt’s excusing of right-wing antisemites such as Elon Musk because of their shared pro-Israel Apartheid sentiments.
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acacia-clan · 3 months ago
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Moon 8
Previous
Next
I’VE DONE IT. I FINALLY GOT THIS OUT. But actually drawing the panels took a lot less time than Moon 7
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teabookgremlin · 7 months ago
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i cried in bed last night bc i saw a reel on instagram of someone showing all the things that belonged to their dead dog to that song “pink skies” bc it made me think of the bag of things in my closet that belonged to the dogs i’ve raised
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sweetteaswift · 2 years ago
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may or may not have just spent $60 on yarn for a hopefully housewarming/more likely anniversary gift for my lesbian mom friends
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thatweirdtranny · 1 year ago
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say what you will about me but at least i’ve never broken moots with somebody for talking about antisemitism 😬
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galariangengar · 1 year ago
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💭
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docjayfeather · 3 months ago
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All of the Ren Lore i’ve compiled from his single player series and old streams
Favorite meal is roast lamb and roast potatoes
Has an ex-girlfriend
Hates One Direction
Was on a boating team in high school
His mother’s first cat’s name was Ebony
His single player world started in 1.2
Ren’s favorite language is Spanish
Ren has been to Spain several times
His brother had a dog named Rorschach
Ren’s favorite armor set in the original Diablo was the Moon set
Ren and his brother used to have to shower/bath together, then dry off infront of an electric fireplace. Through a series of events, young Ren got his butt stuck to the glass pane of the electric fireplace, and has had a scar on his butt since.
Ren has said “I always think about [Ren’s brother’s username] when I think about my butt”
Ren knows how to do a cats cradle
Ren used to have frosted tips
Ren’s favorite commander deck is Kraum/Tymna
Ren got kicked in the literal butthole by a horse
Ren likes burning things
Ren created a rigged marble slot machine in high school
Went on an introspection journey, visiting all the places he lived and all his jobs pre-YouTube
Did the insane thing of asking the lady who was now living in his first house if he could go inside and check out his old room
Ren had a patreon tier where he’d sent his patrons a “Ren Crate”, a lootcrate full of stuff
Ren doesn’t drink (anymore)
Officially has OCD
Ren loves apple juice
Ren loves driving games
Event manager for The Deftones once
Plays MtG on Sundays
Ren wants to retire with Doc
Ren’s wants his spirit animal to be a shark
Ren’s favorite book series is LotR
Ren is “below-average hairy”
Ren’s favorite season is Autumn
Ren’s birthday is October 11th
Ren is a slut for tiramisu and ice cream
Ren wants to open an LGS/tabletop cafe
Ren is not a religious person
Ren worked in a seedy pool bar
Ren almost got an upper back tattoo
Ren loves green tea
Ren is Left Handed
Ren was at one point a vegetarian for several years
Ren has lost his wallet multiple times, once leaving it on a train
Ren eats a whole lemon every day, and drinks lemon juice straight from the lemon
Ren got in trouble at boarding school for “trying to summon demons”. He was just playing MtG.
Ren has had a pair of lucky underwear since he was 18
Ren’s favorite ice cream is strawberry
Ren loved getting aggressively physical in rugby
Ren loves cinnamon buns
Ren used to have super long butt-length hair
Ren really liked playing with fireworks when he was younger. They’d bury huge ones in the sand near their house to make craters.
Ren loves Love Island
Ren can only sleep on his arm
Wears exclusively Star Wars socks and has matching pajamas
Beat Gabriel Nasif in a Magic Grand Prix
Ren hates Oysters
Ren’s favorite dog breed is a chihuahua??
Ren’s favorite dnd class is bard
Ren enjoys cleaning the bathroom the most out of any room
Ren’s favorite musical is Les Miserables
Ren has a favorite kitchen knife, and used to cook a lot.
Ren’s favorite tool is the hoe (of course)
Ren and Iskall used to play League
Never farts irl
born in the same city as J R R Tolkien
Ren named his first car Maximus
Ren is a bath person
Natural Mace Race runner
Ren really likes pet rats
Ren has a very consistent shopping day of tuesday
Ren has an extremely strict sleep schedule
Ren has 7 pairs of the same pajamas to wear 24/7
Ren has a BA in English
Ren does 100 push-ups a day
Ren does a 15k bike ride every day
Ren had a max weight of 110 kilos, is now down to 80
Ren uses youtube in light mode
Ren has seen Metallica live
Ren wore fake glasses in college
Ren has 20/20 vision
Ren has been in plays during school, and blinded the lead with glitter accidentally during one of them, trying to spice up his one line.
Ren has a “black book” of atleast 9 board game ideas
Ren gets pretty motion sick
Ren enjoys mosh pits
Ren really likes competitive monopoly and risk
Ren burned his eyebrows off with a bunson burner once
Ren still cries at The Lion King
Ren plays Ornn, Urgot, and Tristana in League
Ren was allegedly born in 1982
Ren drunk-puked into his shirt in a german taxi the night he met Doc infront of the people sponsoring them
Ren drives stick shift and loves it
Ren thinks he might have a gluten allergy
Ren puts butter in his coffee
Ren tried to write a YA fantasy novel, got 80k words in before scrapping it
Ren would like to live with Keralis hypothetically out of any of the hermits
Ren’s favorite superhero is wolverine
Ren has tinnitus 
Ren convinced Cleo to start streaming, partially leading to her going full time 
Ren once barbecued on radio in the studio 
Ren stayed on his ex-girlfriend’s floor for the first six months of him moving to england
Ren got kicked in the balls trying to sell tickets to musicals in Leicester Square 
Ren loves playing golf and tennis 
Ren hates soccer
Ren loves queues, maybe ironically maybe unironically
Ren drinks four cups of tea a day 
Ren’s favorite season is 3rd life
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ayeforscotland · 4 months ago
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Ten years since the Scottish independence referendum and I’ve aged 40 years since then.
I don’t think there’s much I can say that I haven’t said before, but the past ten years have done nothing but prove remaining in the UK was a mistake.
Tories and Labour are two cheeks of the same arse. Cost of living is through the roof, energy bills are about to rocket again in October, and wages have been stagnant for years.
The SNP are exhausted after over a decade in government. As much as I speak positively about Nicola Sturgeon, and she did great things as FM, there was a complete failure to prepare a successor which combined with an aversion to inner party conflict has led them to this stage.
On the flip side, young people overwhelming support independence even while SNP support weans.
Independence support sits at 2014 levels, which increases to a majority if independence was to lead to rejoining the EU.
Politics is tiring stuff, but there’s no rest for the wicked.
Onwards💙
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fairuzfan · 9 months ago
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"Israel also secretly hires Jewish Americans as spies to work out of its Washington embassy and its consulates around the United States to covertly surveil and monitor fellow Americans, including students. Thoroughly vetted to ensure loyalty to Israel, many of those hired have spent years heavily involved in pro-Israeli activities from the time they were in college and before. Among them was Julia Reifkind, who led a pro-Israel group at the University of California at Davis before moving on to become an activist with AIPAC. After she graduated in 2016, she was hired by Israel and assigned to its embassy in Washington.
Reifkind had good preparation for her assignment. Thinking that Kleinfeld was a fellow pro-Israel activist, over dinner at Washington’s Mari Vanna restaurant she revealed that while at AIPAC she spent much of her time deceiving college students about her covert connection to the organization. “Obviously, I’m an AIPAC-trained campus activist,” she said. “When you’re lobbying on behalf of AIPAC, you don’t say AIPAC, you say, ‘I’m a pro-Israel student from UC Davis.’ And when you’re meeting with students on campus I would never say, ‘I am the AIPAC campus rep.’ I’d say, ‘My name is Julia and I’m a pro-Israel student.’”
At the embassy, Reifkind focused on developing intelligence on fellow Americans, including students on college campuses. “So nobody really knows what we’re doing,” she said. “But mainly it’s been a lot of research like monitoring BDS.”
In a different conversation, Reifkind explained: “It’s mainly gathering intel, reporting back to Israel. That’s a lot of what I do. To report back to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, the Ministry of Strategic Affairs, and make sure they have the right information.” Among the ways she spies on pro-Palestinian activists and Palestinian human rights supporters is with phony Facebook accounts. “I have my fake Facebook that I follow all the SJP [Students for Justice in Palestine] accounts. I have some fake names. My name is Jay Bernard or something.”
Once Reifkind collected the intelligence on her targets, she passed it on to her boss at the embassy. Then it was sent to the Ministry of Strategic Affairs and other offices over a secure encrypted system called Cables. It’s “really secure,” she said. “I don’t have access to [it] because I’m an American.… I’ve seen it, it looks really bizarre…. And then they’ll send something back and he’ll translate it and tell me what I need to do.”
Since the brutal Hamas attacks on Israeli civilians on October 7 and the Israeli invasion of Gaza, the ICC and its US-based spy networks are no doubt working overtime. But there is little likelihood of interference by the FBI—well trained to look the other way when it comes to Israel. It was a situation that even frustrated a former head of the FBI’s counterintelligence division. When I asked him why no one would talk to me about Israel’s massive espionage in the United States, he simply shook his head.
“You don’t think Israel’s a sensitive topic?” he asked, requesting that his name not be used. “So, Israel has been looked at and is being looked at and that’s all I can tell you,” he said. “But nobody’s doing anything.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“You can imagine,” is all he would say, implying high-level political involvement. I then said that I was planning to write about the topic. “I hope you do. I hope you do,” he said. Sighing, he added, “I’ve been there done that. I know it. I’ve brought cases to the Department of Justice on Israel.” Cases that were never opened."
— Israel’s War on American Student Activists by James Bamford on The Nation
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retrosabers · 3 months ago
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𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐇𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐄𝐕𝐄.
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logan howlett x fem!reader
summary: when you wake up sick on your favorite day of the year, logan tries his hand at a romantic gesture
OR the time logan howlett gave you the best at home halloween you could ask for
contains: so!! much!! fluff!! soft logan, friends to lovers, some angst, mentions of past trauma, reader has telekinetic powers, kissing, swearing
!! there’s a scene in here inspired by “room for rent” by @hauntedhowlett-writes ! go check out their amazing work !!
word count: 5.5k (i got insanely carried away)
a/n: sorry for this little period of inactivity!! i’ve been feeling under the weather and lacking some inspiration and motivation, but luckily i think i’ve got my groove back! i hope you all have a happy halloween & enjoy this sweet story of everyone’s favorite wolvie <3
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mutant feelings on halloween were fairly divided.
it was a love or hate kind of thing. many viewed the holiday as a hypocritical mockery; how could humans be so outward in their distaste for mutants while dedicating an entire day to parading around as the very creatures they despised? others, like yourself, saw it as a joyful occasion. a day where everyone could be as authentically themselves as they wanted to be, and not get judged for it.
safe to say, it was your favorite holiday. something you looked forward to every year, especially since you never really got the opportunity to properly celebrate it growing up.
you had the whole day planned out for weeks. your costume decided far before that. much like how a child felt on christmas eve, you felt a similar excitement and anticipation building within you on the night of october 30th.
but it would appear the powers at large weren’t feeling too generous. because at a little bit past 8, your throat started feeling scratchy.
it was easy to blame it on the changing weather, maybe some seasonal allergies if you were feeling particularly delusional. you knew exactly how your body behaved when you were feeling sick, and it always started with a sore throat. still, you snuggled under the blanket in hopes that it would pass by morning.
by the time the sun rose, your nose was blocked and it felt like you were swallowing glass.
so much for a happy halloween.
you stumble out of your room in sweatpants and a cardigan, significantly less presentable than your normal attire. all you wanted was to stay in bed, but there was a group of young students that weren’t going to teach themselves. so you dragged yourself from the comfort of your cocoon, splashed some cold water on your face, and hoped you looked presentable enough.
the glimpse you catch of yourself in the mirror on the way out didn’t appear very promising. it seems your suspicions are confirmed when a familiar face spots you.
“you look like hell,” logan calls from the other end of the hallway. he makes his way over to you in long swift strides, the heavy sound of his boots echoing in the rather quiet space.
“sure feel like it too,” you utter back weakly, your voice hoarse and tired. unexpectedly, the back of his palm presses gently against your forehead, a crease forming between his brows when he feels how warm you are.
“jesus, you’re burning up.”
“funny, because i’m absolutely freezing,” you croak, wrapping your sweater tightly around your body to prove your point. when you suddenly sneeze, everything in the hallway shakes. from the paintings on the walls, to the vases on tables scattered about. you flush in embarrassment and logan frowns.
he places his hand on the small of your back, nudging you in the direction of your bedroom door.
“logan, i have a class to teach,” you argue weakly, followed by a nasty sounding cough.
“you can’t teach them anything if you’re like this the whole time bub.”
silence on your end, because you know he’s right. you just hate caving when you’re feeling under the weather, always trying your hardest to persevere. especially, on today of all days.
“but it’s halloween,” you counter with a whine, on the verge of pouting because you were so annoyed and fed up. “i had a fun lesson about edgar allan poe planned.”
“had the whole damn day planned,” you huff to yourself, though you should’ve known logan’s enhanced hearing would catch it.
he shoots you a sympathetic glance, unlocking the door and motioning you inside.
“i know,” he soothes you with the rubbing of his thumb against the base of your spine. “maybe if you get some rest now, you’ll feel better later, yeah?”
you sigh, flopping onto your mattress dramatically.
“i suppose you’re right.”
logan chuckles at your grumbling against the bedsheets. he makes his way over to you again, brushing away the hair that was stuck to your forehead. crouching down, he presses the sweetest kiss against your temple, and his heart swells at the tired little smile you give him.
“i’ll come back to check on you in a bit,” he promises. “in the meantime, you try and get some shut eye.”
you nod from your position against the pillows, eyes already fluttering shut in hopes that maybe logan was right. you’d feel better in a few hours, and today could be saved after all. in your mind, you were optimistic.
your body, however, had other plans.
before it was even noon, you went through a whole box of tissues, and sneezed so hard and violently that it damn near shook the whole entire floor. any glimmer of hope for getting better was snuffed out quickly, meaning you’d be a prisoner to this bed until you got better in a few days.
when logan came back to check on you, he was surprised to see the state of your bedroom. the usually clean, tidy space was ridden with tissues, your comforter was on the floor, and everything hanging on the wall had been turned every which way. and to top it all off, you were curled on the side of your bed, sniffling with washed out cheeks and a bright red nose.
“do not, say i look like shit,” you warn him, though you lack any sort of intimidation. logan shoots his hands up in defense from his place in the doorway.
“wasn’t planning on it.”
you open one eye and raise an eyebrow.
the corner of his lip turns up in a smirk. “i was going to say your room looks like shit.”
one of your throw pillows feebly comes into contact with his head. not nearly as hard as you intended, but your powers were always a little out of wack whenever your immune system was.
“s’ not funny logan,” you squeak, fully peaking your head out from it’s place in your blanket burrito.
logan picks the pillow up from the floor, mindlessly tossing it between his hands as he walks towards your bed.
“you know i can’t help teasing you when you’re grumpy,” he jokes, coming to sit on the corner of your mattress.
“i’m grumpy because this is my favorite day of the year and i’m stuck in a purgatory of snot and mucus,” you groan. the pout on your face is unmistakable, and logan would think it was the cutest thing he’s ever seen if there wasn’t genuine sadness in your tone.
“why do you even like this stupid holiday so much anyways?” logan questions. it comes out a bit meaner than he wants it to, like he’s making fun of you. it only adds to your upset state, and you narrow your eyes at him.
“because it’s fun,” you bite. “especially when you’re a kid that never got to experience it until you became an adult. i do the same thing every year because it brings me comfort. people like us don't get a lot of that.”
logan knows how true that is better than anyone.
“plus it’s a day mutants don’t have to worry as much,” you continue. “we can be ourselves and it looks like we’re just blending in with everyone else.”
you mumble this last part with a glumness he’s never heard from you before.
“it’s like we’re normal.”
logan doesn’t say anything in rebuttal. he just nods his head in agreeance, letting your words sink in. he never thought about it that way, and a wave of guilt suddenly washes over him for not considering that your feelings about today ran deeper than he initially thought.
the sound of a pill bottle shaking snaps you from your wallowing. your eyes flick back to logan, who’s holding medicine in his free hand.
“stole these from the infirmary,” he gets up to place the bottle on your bedside table, picking up a few stray tissues and tossing them into the small trash can next to your bed. “figured you could use something to help you feel a little better.”
you croak out a “thanks” before that dreaded tickling in your nose starts again.
“oh no,” you whisper, bracing for impact. logan looks at you with a puzzled expression at the exact moment when you sneeze. the entire room shakes, sending the wolverine stumbling back a few paces. there’s a couple seconds of vibration afterwards before everything returns to normal.
after regaining his footing, logan makes a beeline for the bathroom. you hear the faucet running and he returns to you with a glass of water.
he nods at you wordlessly, head motioning back and forth between you and the cup. you sniffle as you shuffle yourself upright. you take the medicine without a word, letting the cold water soothe your irritated throat. logan’s eyes don’t leave your face the entire time. he stares at you with something unfamiliar, to both you, and to him. it makes a new kind of warmth coat your body, one that has little to do with your current state.
your relationship with logan was hard to explain. you weren’t quite lovers, and labeling what transpired between you as friendship didn’t feel adequate. friends surely didn’t kiss each other on the cheek, or occasionally doze on each other’s shoulder during long sleepless nights. it was so painfully obvious to everyone else that there was something between you two.
but knowing logan and his track record of emotional unavailability, you always doubted whether or not he really shared those feelings.
clearing his throat, he dissolves any buzz you were feeling. logan offers you a tight lipped smile before slowly backing away. there’s a part of you that misses the closeness already, but you shove it down.
“if you need anything else, you know where to find me,” he says quietly, his body halfway out the door.
you nod with tired eyes. “thanks again logan.”
he simply nods his head once more before shutting the door completely.
you slink back under the comfort of your blanket, allowing the weight of your own words to take their effect. today wasn’t just special because it was a way to heal your inner child. today was important to you because you could feel safe in a world that normally didn’t accept people like your family. people like you. as cliche as it sounded, it was the truth.
as you try to fall back to sleep, you can’t help but dramatically wonder if being sick today was the universe’s way of punishing you for your optimism. for believing there could ever come a time where people accepted mutants.
it was a silly notion that would have to be pried from your cold dead hands. because though you didn’t have much comfort, you always had hope.
when you succumb to the drowsiness, you dream of being a child that didn’t have to be locked away in a lab on all hallows eve.
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the smell of cookie dough rouses you from slumber.
slowly, you come to, stretching out your tired limbs as you shrug off the blanket that was wrapped around your figure since this morning. you’re still tired, but the fatigue that burdened your body was much less than it was a few hours ago. the medicine that logan brought you had worked. you smile to yourself, remembering to thank him the next time you saw him.
orange light bathes your room in a sunkissed glow, signaling that the day is coming to an end. the disappointment from before creeps its way back in, a reminder that all your plans for today were a wash. you squint your eyes in the direction of your alarm clock, trying to make out the time.
6:37 pm.
it was still early enough that you could try and put on a movie at least. scott, jean, and ororo, were set to take all of the kids trick or treating around 6. you were supposed to be joining them, but from the stark silence that seeped in from under the door, it was clear they were already well on their way without you.
you know it's because you weren’t feeling well, but that didn’t make it sting any less. you stare at the costume hung over your desk chair, and suddenly it feels like you’re a little girl again, sad and disappointed because you couldn’t go out with all the other kids.
maybe next year, you tell yourself.
after a moment of self pity, it hits you just how gross you’re feeling. staying in bed all day always sounded good in theory, but in practice, it just made you feel like a slob. in a flash, you kick all the covers to the foot of the bed, making your way to the bathroom and stripping off your clothes as you went. you were in desperate need of a hot shower, a leg shave, the whole nine yards.
steam cakes the mirror with condensation, the soft sound of water trickling down the drain relaxing you almost immediately. you take your time washing the day away, letting the scalding hot droplets soothe your tired muscles. you stand beneath the stream until the water goes cold, shutting the shower off and reaching for a plush towel.
the cold air of your room erupts goosebumps on your skin. whether it was from the change in temperature, or the fact that your room was now completely back to normal, you’re not sure.
strange. you don’t recall hearing anyone enter. surely this much reorganizing would’ve created some noise, something audible over the sound of running water, but you can’t remember hearing the slightest peep.
you cling to the towel around your body like a lifeline, afraid someone was going to jump out from a corner and startle you. after a quick once over of the room, you accept the fact that it’s empty. your eyes settle on a set of clothes folded neatly on the corner of your bed.
your comfiest pajamas. an old baggy t-shirt with yellow and orange plaid pants.
too tired to question it, you slip them on without a second thought, relishing in the feeling of the soft fabric against your skin. you felt more like yourself than you have all day.
the sweet aroma from before catches your attention again. no one was supposed to be here still, not anyone you’d expect to be baking anyways. curiosity gets the best of you, and you make your way out of your bedroom and down the main staircase to the kitchen.
the last thing you expect to see is logan howlett fussing over a tray of cookies.
he grumbles something incoherent under his breath. probably a swear word or two, given he looked frustrated and out of his element.
“what are you doing?” your voice manages to startle him, a first you have yet to see since logan arrived at the mansion.
the man scratches the back of his neck awkwardly, gesturing to the tray before him on the counter.
“i was uh,” he stumbles over his words. another logan first. “just pulling these out of the oven.”
you eye him mischievously. “since when do you bake?”
there’s a beat of awkward silence that passes while logan struggles to conjure up a logical answer. because no, he didn’t bake, not now, not ever in his life. but what’s the alternative? the much scarier conversation about his feelings?
from the knowing glint in your eye, it might just have to be the latter.
logan sighs. a sound of defeat, coupled with a flash of teeth. he leans back against the edge of the counter, thick arms folded across a broad chest.
“marie helped me put ‘em in,” he admits a bit sheepishly. “was afraid i’d burn the place down if i tried to do it myself.”
you laugh at the memory of scott storming into the kitchen with a fire extinguisher last month after logan tried to cook eggs. it sparks a fondness in your chest, connecting the dots as to why logan would go through all this trouble.
“i’m glad she stepped in before you could manage to start a fire,” you joke, stepping further into the kitchen. it grants you a better look at just how messy it was, from the flour sprinkled across countertops, to bowls thrown askew. your brows pull together in confusion, a question on the tip of your tongue before you turn in the direction of the common area.
your eyes nearly water at the sight.
the living room had been turned into a heaven of pillows and blankets, little tealights placed around the edge of the table in the center. there was a stack of movies nearly as tall as you sitting in the middle, and when you squint, you could make out a few of the titles.
a nightmare on elm street, hocus pocus, friday the 13th.
they were all your favorite halloween movies.
logan comes into your peripheral vision, carefully gauging your reaction with nervous eyes.
“what’s all this?” you breathe out, a surprised smile forming on your face. it brightens even more when you see how shy logan looks from his place against the wall.
“i know you were bummed that things didn’t go how you wanted today,” he speaks lowly, somewhat unsure of himself. it was almost heartwarming to see such a rugged, brooding man be so timid. clearly this was something way outside of his comfort zone.
and yet, he did all this for you.
he looks around the room, stalling on meeting your gaze out of nerves. when he finally does, there’s so much adoration, so much tenderness in your eyes that he’s overwhelmed by it.
it’s something so foreign to logan, but it feels so right. something that he’s unknowingly longed for, and now that he has it, he’s determined not to let it slip from his grasp.
he’s got a little bit of his regular confidence back now. it's evident in the way he straightens himself out, his natural smirk returning.
“figured this might cheer you up a bit.”
the warmth in your cheeks is inevitable. it always was whenever logan was around, but this felt different than your normal exchanges. you thought maybe you had been imagining the lingering touches and stolen glances, that you were a fool for thinking logan could reciprocate the feelings you harbored for him.
but as he stands before you, with a small bashful smile and hazel eyes filled with warmth, you know that it’s not one sided. never was, and never could be.
logan nearly falls over when you jump into his arms, his hands coming to wrap around your waist on instinct. the embrace is unexpected, but not unwelcome. once logan takes a second to get his bearings, his body relaxes and molds into yours, lifting you an inch or two off the ground as he envelops you fully. your own arms wrap around his neck, face buried in his shoulder as you take in the feeling that you’ve wondered about for so long.
“thank you,” you whisper against the fabric of his shirt, smiling into the worn material.
with his enhanced senses, logan can feel the rapid thrum of your heartbeat against his own. months and months of dancing around each other finally coming to a head. he gives you one final, tight squeeze before pulling away, though he makes no move to let go of your body.
when he tucks a piece of hair behind your ear and caresses your cheekbone with his thumb, your knees feel like they might buckle.
“s’nothing much,” which was essentially logan speak for “i’d do everything in my power to keep you happy.”
you’re well aware that he’s not the best with expressing how he felt. but this simple, sweet gesture was worth more than any lengthy monologue in your book.
you catch him eyeing your mouth briefly, and you do the same, letting your mind travel to that familiar place of wondering. thinking about how his lips would feel against your own. how they would feel in other places. just as you find yourself leaning in, a kitchen timer buzzes, startling you both.
logan can’t hide his annoyance at the interruption, reluctantly removing himself from you to stop the incessant chiming.
“this damn thing,” he grumbles, shaking his head.
you stifle a laugh when he throws the timer back onto the counter a bit too harshly, sending it bouncing into a stray bowl.
deciding to take the reigns, you walk over and reach for his hand. logan’s eyes widen a bit at your outstretched palm, even more so at the confident grin you wear. he doesn’t hesitate to lock his hand in yours, trying his damndest to ignore the electricity he feels from such a small thing.
“come on,” you nod your head in the direction of the couch, playful sarcasm in your tone.
“we’ve only got all night.”
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“i don’t see it.”
you whip your head in logan’s direction, shrieking out a “what?” as you look back at the tv screen.
“you look just like him,” you argue, leaning forward to grab a cookie from the plate he brought into the room. “it’s uncanny.”
logan laughs to himself, shaking his head at your antics. “you keep telling yourself that bub.”
as the credits of van helsing start to roll, you decide to try your hand at a bit of flirting.
“y’know, you should take that as a huge compliment,” you state, sinking further into the couch cushions.
logan raises a brow, taking a sip of his beer and experimentally scooting closer to you.
“and why’s that?”
you try to maintain your confidence, but logan doesn’t make it very easy. not when he’s a human furnace that’s inching into your space. not when he already makes you warm in the face in nearly every situation.
clearing your throat, you shrug a shoulder, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible.
“i had a huge crush on him growing up. thought he was super hot.”
oh. if this is the game you’re playing, logan knows for sure he’ll win.
“really?” he exaggerates, placing his arm on the back of the couch. the tips of his fingers brush against your shoulder, and he relishes in the goosebumps they create.
“mhm,” you hum, eyes not wavering from the screen. “you should be super flattered right now.”
logan chuckles again, reaching for a cookie of his own. he decides he’ll space out his teasing, be a bit generous. you were in a poor position right now, still being a little sick and all.
he’d much prefer to see you really keep up with him anyways. still, he can’t help himself.
“whatever you say darlin’,” he murmurs.
your breath hitches ever so slightly.
jesus christ it feels like this couch is on fire.
you can see his smirk out of the corner of your eye, and you feel like a schoolgirl over the way that one simple word was making you feel so giddy. tucking your legs underneath your body, you shift more to your side so you were now fully facing logan.
as you take in your surroundings, from the coziness of the living room, to the beauty of the man beside you, the inquiry that’s been floating around your head for the past couple hours falls from your lips.
“how did you even know all of this?” you question him while biting the head off of one of the bat cookies.
“know all of what?” he repeats, half of his mouth filled with cookie dough.
“that this is what i do,” you gesture to the television screen and the plate that was sitting on the table. “movies and cookies, specifically these, every single year?”
logan feigns realization, despite knowing what you meant the first time you asked. he was just too self conscious to explain the reason why. his coyness from earlier returns, the apples of his cheeks showing a tinge of pink.
“overheard you talking with ororo a couple days ago,” he begins, sliding his palms over the expanse of his denim clad thighs. “about the movie thing and stuff.”
you think back to that conversation with vague memory. you recall discussing your halloween plans, but never diving into such specifics.
logan answers your next question before you can utter it.
“i asked her this morning what all your favorite things were.” he clears his throat a bit awkwardly. “i wanted to do something once i realized you were sick.”
he trails off, not sure if he should venture into this territory again after his remark from earlier. he moves around so his position mirrors yours, making you both unable to avoid each other’s faces.
“i didn’t mean to be a dick before,” he starts to apologize. you know it’s taking a lot for him to admit his faults, and it makes all the effort he put into this even more meaningful.
“this,” he motions around the room, “was my way of trying to say i’m sorry.”
you tilt your head to the side, eyeing him empathetically.
“you don’t need to apologize for that,” you reassure him, placing a hand on his arm. “though i’m enjoying it. these cookies are really good.”
he smiles a little at your joke, soft crinkles forming in the corner of his eyes.
“i can’t take credit for that,” he admits, cocking his head in the direction of the staircase. “it was all marie.”
the thought of logan recruiting the teenager for assistance was sickly sweet. knowing marie, it was probably her idea to help. you can picture the pair of them in the kitchen, her seeming more like the adult and him like the child.
“still,” you assert. “just the fact that you thought of all this means a lot.”
his thumb rubs featherlight circle on your exposed skin. “it’s nothing, really.”
there he goes again with the undermining.
sighing, you drag your fingers up and down the expanse of his arm, eyes drawn to the motion rather than the man. you feel like your heart might burst if you go a second longer without being a bit more direct. but god was it nerve wracking. especially when logan looked at you like you were the only thing in the whole entire universe.
“this is probably the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me,” you admit lowly, toying with the hem of his sleeve, too nervous and overwhelmed to meet the wolverine’s intense gaze.
your hand moves towards his again, lightly tracing the outlines of his veins. you muster up the courage to look back up at logan, who somehow moved even closer to you in the 15 seconds you’ve spent fixated on his flannel. the soft glow of the tea lights illuminated the amber flecks of his irises, highlighted the structure of his nose, the curve of his muscles. made him look like something out of a dream. it sure felt like you were in one.
when his hand clasps around yours, you realize that this isn’t a dream. it’s your reality, and you better take advantage of it.
you let ten words convey everything.
“i’m really glad the person who did it was you.”
that’s all logan needs to hear before he decides he can’t hold back any longer. his lips find yours with a tender urgency, like he wanted to savor the moment and devour you whole all at once. the hand that was once on the couch moved to cradle your jaw, just about entirely encompassing the side of your head.
that place of wondering was correct in its predictions. despite all of his rough edges and gruffness, logan’s lips were softer than you ever could’ve imagined. your hands find purchase in the strands of hair at the nape of his neck, your bodies smushed together on the couch. logan wants nothing more than to pull you onto his lap, but he knows that’s more than likely to lead to some rather ungentlemanly activities. no, he wants to do this properly, take things nice and slow. so he settles for keeping his hands above the collar, and from the soft sighs he can hear you let out, it seems to be doing the trick.
it feels like you’re on cloud 9 as your lips move together, your disappointment of today’s plans long forgotten. all you could focus on was how perfect this moment was, how perfect logan felt. his thumb teases the corner of your mouth, a silent command that he wants to explore you further and you open yourself up with ease. his tongue prods between your lips gently, a contrast to the feeling of his calloused palm against your skin.
you move slow and syrupy, not wanting time to pass. if your mutation was time manipulation, you surely would’ve halted it, letting yourself stay in this little bubble of bliss for as long as you wanted.
but of course, all good things must come to an end. because as much as your brain had turned to jelly for the time being, the tiny functioning part that was left blossomed a new worry.
logan fears he’s done something wrong when you pull back quick and unexpectedly, your eyes wide with something he can’t quite place.
“everything okay?” he asks cautiously, frozen in position. the answer you provide is far from what he had in mind.
“i don’t want you to get sick,” you mutter, clasping a hand over your mouth. the fact that that’s what you’re worried about right now, makes logan’s heart flutter a little, as silly as it was.
all of his anxieties fade in an instant, amusement taking its place instead. logan barks out a laugh, probably one of the most sincere sounding ones you’ve ever heard from him.
“what’s so funny?” you ask, confused as to why he’d be laughing when you were dead serious. the saliva swap that just transpired was sure to pass along whatever germs your body was still harboring. the last thing you wanted was for logan to feel as shitty as you felt this morning.
“honey,” he cuts through his laughter, clutching at his sides. “i don’t get sick.”
“what do you mean, ‘you don’t get sick’?”
“regeneration,” he states matter of factly, calming down a bit. “anything that could harm my body, my mutation takes care of.”
right.
for what feels like the millionth time today, you blush. not in flattery, but in embarrassment. you hide your face behind your hands, cursing yourself for halting a damn good makeout.
“i’m such an idiot,” you mumble into your palms. “i cannot believe i just ruined the moment like that.”
“hey, hey,” logan coos, gingerly pulling your hands away from your face. your eyes are still screwed shut, not wanting to face any more ridicule than necessary, even if it was only playful. the feeling of logan’s thumb and forefinger lightly grasping at your chin causes your eyelids to flutter.
“look at me.”
slowly, you open your eyes. logan’s grip on your chin is firm but gentle. it’s to keep you from running from him, forcing you to be on the same level.
“you didn’t ruin anything,” he tells you in the most caring tone of of voice.
“promise?”
logan leans in and gives you a long, lingering kiss. it’s somehow even more maddening than the first one, and your stomach feels like it’s on a rollercoaster you’re not sure you ever want to get off of.
when he pulls away, he shoots you a wink, and you fight the urge to melt on the spot.
“promise.”
he presses airy little kisses to both of your cheeks before settling back against the couch.
“now, where were we?”
you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, watching closely as logan’s eyes lingered on your mouth again. in a flirty move, you tease him by moving in impossibly close, your lips barely a centimeter apart. just as he’s about to close the gap, your press your pointer finger to his mouth, catching him by surprise.
“i think it’s time for another movie,” you sing song, prancing off the couch and in the direction of the dvd player.
you tease.
logan simply shakes his head, beaming at you as you scan over your movie selection. he’s come to know and notice a lot of things about you. the way your nose wrinkles when you get excited. how you take your coffee. the thing you do with your hands when you get nervous. your pet peeves. he finds something new to admire about you every day. right now he’s soaking in the joy that radiates off you in bright yellow waves, unavoidable to those in your orbit.
in that moment, logan decides he always wants to be in the path of their warmth.
when you pad back over to the couch as the opening credits start, you tuck yourself into his side. logan’s arm pulls you close, anchoring you to him in more ways than one. you fit together like puzzle pieces, soon to be inseparable now that you knew just how well you connected.
in the glow of the television and the tea lights, snug by his side, he thinks you’ve never looked more beautiful.
maybe halloween wasn’t so bad after all.
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thanks for reading! <3
bat divider by @saradika-graphics
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alwaysobsessed777 · 4 months ago
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WE FELL IN LOVE IN OCTOBER - P.B.
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warnings: none
words: 1018
summary: reader wants to ask out Paige, and when she does, Paige says yes
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“Paigeeee,” I whined, pulling her towards the fair. Paige and I have been friends since the beginning of college. Running into her in a coffee shop was the best accident to ever happen to me. The awkwardness of the encounter becoming a friendship I might ruin in a matter of minutes.  
Since we’ve became friends, becoming more and more comfortable, I've slowly fell in love with her. Now, here I am, dragging her to a pumpkin festival, planning on asking her to be my girlfriend. Did i think she was going to say yes? No. But what’s wrong with trying?  
She laughed, pulling me from my spiraling thoughts, “Y/n, calm down. It’s still gonna be there in five minutes.” 
I rolled my eyes, “Okay, I want us to go in the corn maze now!” 
She chuckles, “Whatever.” She let me drag her to the entrance, I buy both of our ways in (After much arguing about it). We walked in, my gaze locked on the maze. I knew exactly what I wanted to do, I just needed to get myself to do it.  
“Come on, this way!” I managed to get us both straight to the maze. Knowing we’d have to bolt past the concessions, Paige would keep us there all day.  
“Wait, we shoulda stopped and grabbed food,” She pouts, I hold back a smile. Sometimes, it got progressively harder to stop myself from kissing her right then and there. When she pouts, that’s the worst.  
“Stop pouting, I’ll buy you something after the maze,” I finally slowed my walk, my grip on her wrist loosening, and my mind starting to race. 
“Why’d you want to come here so bad, I mean the maze?” Her face held concern. I wanted to just do it, ask her, but my nerves were going crazy.  
I shrugged, playing it cool, “I don’t know, it’s the best part of the fair.” Wrong. The rides were; everyone knew that. 
“Uh, that’s completely wrong,” She ran her hands through her hair, “What made you say that?” 
Could she not ask questions right now, as much as I love to hear her talk, not right now. “I don’t know, change of heart maybe.” 
“Whatever weirdo,” She glanced around, taking in her surroundings, “I don’t understand why people enjoy trapping themselves in a maze for long periods of time. Like, why?” 
I snickered, her mind always intrigued me. The way she thinks, it was something else sometimes.  
“I’m not joking! Like, please answer that question,” I spun around, deciding to just drop it on her now. 
“After you answer my question,” She smirks, one of her eyebrows raised.  
“Yes ma’am, now what’s this question of yours?” I felt my throat close. I couldn’t breathe, let alone talk.  
“Can I say some stuff first?” She nods, “I just wanna say how amazing our friendship is. Paige, you’re like the best person to ever come into my life. You’re always there for me, when my parents weren’t talking to me, when I almost flunked out of school, when...just when I needed you most. I’ve been falling for you, and I can’t say that I hate it. The one person who has made me happy for the last four years is you. I don’t think I’ve ever been so in love with somebody in my life.” 
There was the face I had expected. Confusion was what I thought I was going to get from her. The next bit, not as much.  
“Y/n...I don’t know what to say...” I cut her off, “You don’t have to.” 
“No, I want to,” She paused, grabbing both of my hands, holding them in hers, “Y/n, I didn’t know you felt any way towards me.” 
“Can I ask my question?” She nods, “Will you be my girlfriend?” 
She smiles, “Yes, a hundred times yes.”  
I couldn’t contain myself. I threw myself at her, wrapping my arms around her neck. Her hands landing on my waist, slightly pulling me closer. Never did I think I would say the words ‘Paige Bueckers is my girlfriend,’ but here I am.  
“You wanna get something to eat?” I asked, pushing away from her body ever so slightly.  
“Oh my god, yes. I’m glad you asked me at the beginning of the maze rather then the middle,” I gave her a confused look. “Oh, I saw the messages between you and Nika. You really think she keeps quiet about anything?” 
I blushed, “Nika told you?” 
“No, she was blabbing about it to Aubrey. I walked in and overheard all of it.” 
I hide my face in her shoulder, “Stop, I was so nervous too.” 
She chuckles, “I know, babe.” 
“Then why didn’t you just say something?” 
“I needed to know that it was real, that you were falling for me as hard as I was falling for you,” Her face flushed red, she was second guessing it too. 
“I think I couldn’t be more in love with you than I am right now,” I mumbled into her, a smile spreading onto her face. 
“I think I might love you more,” I raise my head to look at her, “What’s with that look?” 
“I’m literally the one who asked you out...I love you more.” 
“Nope,” She shook her head. I gave her another look. 
“Yeah, come on. I’ve had this massive crush on you for like two years.” 
“Try four, sweetheart.” 
My eyes widened, “Four?” 
She nods, “Yep, I’ve always liked you. The day I saw you in that coffee shop, I literally couldn’t take my eyes off you. I’ve never been so consumed with the feeling of infatuation so strongly in my life. The way you talked so nicely to the barista, the way you smiled, the way you covered your mouth when you laughed, the way your cheeks tinted pink when you got a small compliment, just...everything.” She paused, “I wanted to ask you out then and there, but I had been staring, and completely forgot if you were to turn around, you’d bump right into me.” 
“And I did.” 
“I’m glad I didn’t move.” 
“Me too.” 
a/n: lowkey like it...lowkey hate it
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alienssstufff · 5 days ago
Text
Last Life Apocalypse AU [PROLOGUE 3/3]
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EULOGY (23/10/NULL):
Surveillance footage of the Eremita Local Cemetery on the 23rd of October (Year: NULL). The following is a transcript of several discrepancies timestamps 00:18:15, 0:24:09, 06:24:15 extracted from Camera 3 and has been archived upon cease of investigation.
PROLOGUE: [PART 0] [PART 1 - lineup] [PART 2] [PART 3]
>[READ ARTICLE?]
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00:18:15 , 23/10/NULL:
[SOUNDS OF A CAR ENGINE, MODEL UNSEEN]
[FOOTSTEPS ON PAVEMENT]
A singular flashlight hits the surveillance wall held by a shadow out of camera shot.
[FOOTSTEPS ON GRASS]
[SOUNDS OF PAPER RUSTLING]
GRIAN: (muttering) [UNTRANSLATABLE] GRIAN: You know how busy my schedule is to not show up to the service. GRIAN: -and I know you’re not actually there – None of you are. GRIAN: But I promised Timmy to visit you. GRIAN: He’s in the car right now- probably bawling his eyes out worried sick about the both of you. It took a lot to convince him and Lizzie to let you do this and even more to keep your cases open I– GRIAN: I shouldn’t be mad, I shouldn’t be – but I am. I’ve ‘ad a long hard think the month since you left and I’m actually furious.  GRIAN: Scar, I know I’m not the most open of the two of us -you’re aware of my situation just as I am of yours. And as your friend, I've been respecting your personal space… But if it’s gotten this serious I really wish you could’ve told me… Told anyone! GRIAN: Does Cub know?... Does Bdubs know?? Or have they been lying to me too.
[PAUSE]
GRIAN: The LNC have been looking after the office since your disappearances went public. GRIAN: -Not sure what they’re doing with that I don’t go. Not a part of that. GRIAN: No one can find any of your wills if you wrote them. GRIAN: (laughs) like I doubt it. I don’t even need to check your room to know it’s in utter shambles in there. That’s your responsibility. GRIAN: (pause).... That's your responsibility when you get home. I’m done.
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00:24:09 , 23/10/NULL:
GRIAN: I really don’t know what else there is to say to any of you. Joel I’ve left my condolences with Lizzie, if you want to hear what I have to say tell it to her. She’s the real person the two of you should be apologizing to. GRIAN: I’m going. Come back if you really want to talk.
[FOOTSTEPS ON GRASS]
[FOOTSTEPS ON PAVEMENT]
[SOUNDS OF A CAR ENGINE, MODEL UNSEEN]
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06:24:15 , 23/10/NULL:
[DISTANT SOUNDS OF BIRDS, BREED UNDECIPHERABLE]
It is of note that the external lights operate on a timer, set to turn off at 0600 sharp in accordance to the sunrise. While the positioning of the camera and the facility is orientated to face the east, no direct sunlight can be seen here.
[SOUNDS OF BIRDS, BREED UNDECIPHERABLE]
Small shadows pass within camera shots. Flying in the northern direction.
>[TRANSCRIPT ENDS HERE]
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purifiedclitoris69 · 3 months ago
Text
Pumpkin Guts
Natasha Romanoff x supersoldier!reader
Summary: Your first Halloween :)
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The cool October breeze swept through the compound as you stood quietly by the large window, watching the other Avengers excitedly prepare for their Halloween celebration. They seemed to have an easy camaraderie, something you hadn’t quite figured out how to slip into yet. Since defecting to the team as a former Hydra super soldier, you’d kept your distance—an observer in the background, ever alert, ever guarded. You weren’t used to this kind of normality, this sense of home.
Except for Natasha Romanoff.
Natasha was different. Something about her—maybe it was her calm confidence or her ability to understand without needing to ask—made you feel safe in ways you hadn’t in a long time. You gravitated toward her more than anyone else, drawn to her in ways you were just starting to understand. When she was around, you relaxed, the weight of your past lifting, if only slightly.
This was your first Halloween with the team, and from the looks of it, a big deal to Natasha. You’d never celebrated the holiday before—Hydra hadn’t exactly been festive—and you weren’t sure how to feel about the pumpkins, the decorations, or the costume talk swirling through the compound.
“Hey,” Natasha’s soft voice pulled you from your thoughts. You turned to see her leaning casually against the doorway, a warm smile on her lips.
“Hey,” you replied, your voice a little softer when it was just the two of you.
“You doing okay?” she asked, her green eyes scanning your face with that familiar concern she always seemed to have for you.
You shrugged. “It’s just… a lot. I’ve never done this before.”
Natasha stepped closer, her smile widening. “Then it’s about time you had a proper Halloween, don’t you think? I happen to love this holiday, and I’d say you’re in good hands.”
You felt the corners of your lips tug upward at that. You didn’t often smile, but with Natasha, it was easier. “What’s first then?”
“Pumpkin patch,” she declared, grabbing her jacket and tossing one at you. “Come on. You’re gonna love it.
The haunted carnival had been Natasha’s idea, of course. She loved Halloween—the decorations, the spooky vibe, the general mischief. For you, the idea of spending time in such a lively, festive setting was strange, even a little overwhelming. But the way Natasha’s eyes lit up at each new booth, her excitement infectious, made you want to be there with her. She had a way of making the unfamiliar feel okay.
You noticed she kept glancing at you, checking to see how you were doing. She always did that, never too obvious about it, but enough that you knew she was paying attention.
“You’re quiet tonight,” she said softly, nudging your shoulder as the two of you approached a line of carnival games. “Everything good?”
You nodded. “Just… taking it all in. I’ve never been to anything like this.”
Natasha smiled, her green eyes twinkling in the carnival light. “We’ll make sure you experience everything, then.”
You tried to suppress a smile, but it slipped out, small but genuine. You weren’t used to these kinds of lighthearted moments, but with Natasha, they were becoming more frequent, more comfortable.
“Come on,” she said, tugging you toward a booth where you could see various stuffed animals hanging as prizes. “I bet you can win something.”
You eyed the game suspiciously. It was one of those typical carnival games—a row of bottles stacked together, and the goal was to knock them all over with a single throw. You weren’t one to back down from a challenge, and Natasha seemed to know that. You both knew it wouldn’t be hard for either one of you.
“I’ll give it a shot,” you muttered, stepping up and handing over a ticket.
Natasha stood close, watching intently as you sized up the bottles. With a steady hand, you hurled the ball, knocking over every last one with a resounding clatter. The carnie raised his eyebrows, surprised, and Natasha let out an impressed whistle.
“Nice throw,” she grinned. “Now, what are you going to win me?”
You glanced up at the selection of prizes and, after a moment of contemplation, pointed to a small stuffed bat hanging from the top row. The carnie handed it over with a nod, and you turned to Natasha, holding it out to her.
“A bat?” she teased, but her smile was soft as she took it from you. “I love it.”
“I figured it suited you,” you replied, trying to mask the hint of shyness creeping into your voice.
The rest of the evening was filled with a similar kind of lightness. You went through haunted houses, where Natasha laughed at your stone-faced calm even when actors jumped out to scare you. You shared cotton candy, and she even convinced you to go on a rickety old Ferris wheel that gave you a perfect view of the entire carnival, and both of you a new observed sparkle in eachothers eyes.
But it wasn’t until later that night, back at the compound, that you realized just how much Halloween meant to Natasha.
The knock on your door was unexpected. It was late—late enough that most of the compound had quieted down for the night. You were sitting on your bed, thinking over the evening and the odd warmth that had settled in your chest. Natasha’s smile, her laughter, the brief moments when her arm had brushed yours—it all stuck with you more than you’d anticipated.
When you opened the door, Natasha stood there, a mischievous smile on her face, her arms filled with an array of October-themed treats. “I come bearing desserts,” she announced, pushing her way into your room without waiting for an invitation.
You blinked in surprise, stepping back to let her pass. “Nat, what…?”
“I realized I hadn’t properly introduced you to the best part of Halloween,” she said, setting down a tray on your desk. “The food.”
Your eyes widened as you took in the selection—caramel apples, mini pumpkin pies, Halloween-themed cookies, and candy corn.
“You made all this?”
“Well, I helped make some of it,” she admitted, clearly proud of herself. “Tony’s kitchen is well-stocked for this kind of thing. Thought you might want a late-night snack.”
Your room suddenly felt warmer, more comfortable. The usually bare, sterile space now smelled of cinnamon and sugar, and Natasha’s presence filled the room with a kind of energy you hadn’t known you needed.
She handed you one of the caramel apples, grinning as she took a bite of her own. “Go on. It’s good.”
You hesitated for only a moment before sinking your teeth into the apple. The sweetness hit you instantly, and you couldn’t help the small hum of approval that escaped you.
“Told you,” Natasha said smugly, settling onto your bed with her legs crossed beneath her. She looked completely at ease, like she belonged there.
You found yourself watching her more than you were eating, the way her face softened in the warm glow of the desk lamp, the way she smiled easily when she was with you. You hadn’t felt this kind of peace in a long time, and it unnerved you—but at the same time, you wanted more of it.
“What’s on your mind?” Natasha asked after a few moments of comfortable silence. She always knew when you were caught up in your thoughts.
You shrugged, feeling a little self-conscious. “Just… all of this. All the freedom, the fun, it scares me a little.”
She tilted her head, her smile softening. “I know it is. But that’s why I wanted to make it special.”
Your heart thudded in your chest. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I wanted to,” she replied, her voice low but certain.
You swallowed, feeling the words you’d kept hidden for so long rising to the surface. But you weren’t sure how to say them, or if you should. Natasha had a way of reading your silence, though, and she leaned in just a little closer.
“I’ve seen you since you got here,” she said quietly, her eyes never leaving yours. “You don’t always let people in, but I’m glad you’ve let me.”
Her words made your chest tighten, but in a good way. In a way that made you feel understood. You wanted to tell her how much she meant to you, how she made you feel safer, more grounded than you’d ever felt—but before you could speak, she gave you a playful nudge with her foot.
“Come on,” she said, her eyes gleaming with joy, as she took your hand and dragged you out your room, “we’re going on a horror movie binge,”. she smiled brightly as she led you to the movie room.
The next few weeks were a whirlwind of Halloween-themed activities. Each day brought something new— the caramel apples, spooky movies, and laughter that echoed through the halls. You found yourself relaxing more with the team, but it was Natasha’s presence that truly helped you lower your guard. She made the unfamiliar feel safe.
One evening, you found yourself in the kitchen with Natasha, both of you surrounded by pumpkins.
“You ready for this?” Natasha asked, setting down the biggest pumpkin she could find. You could see the challenge in her eyes, and despite your reluctance to get too involved, you couldn’t help but feel competitive.
“Depends. What exactly are we doing?” you asked, eyeing her with suspicion.
“Carving pumpkins,” she said with a playful smirk. “Or at least, that’s how it’ll start.”
You raised an eyebrow. “And how will it end?”
Natasha grinned, leaning in slightly. “Guess we’ll find out.”
You both got to work, scooping out the pumpkin guts. You were meticulous, focused on getting it just right, while Natasha was more relaxed, humming softly as she carved her design. Every so often, you’d glance over at her, feeling that familiar warmth build in your chest. She made you feel at ease in a way you hadn’t felt in years.
But as the pile of pumpkin guts grew, Natasha’s humming stopped, and you felt something cold and slimy hit the side of your face. You blinked, slowly turning to see Natasha looking far too innocent, a bit of pumpkin goop on her fingers.
“Did you just…?”
“Maybe,” she teased, eyes gleaming with mischief.
You reached for your own handful of pumpkin innards and launched it at her with precision. It hit her square in the shoulder, and her gasp of mock indignation quickly turned into laughter.
“Oh, you’re gonna regret that,” she said, grabbing a larger handful and flinging it at you.
Before you knew it, the kitchen was a battlefield of flying pumpkin guts, laughter ringing in the air as you dodged and retaliated. You hadn’t laughed like this in… ever, really. The sound was foreign to you, but with Natasha, it felt right.
In the chaos of it all, you slipped on a particularly slimy patch of pumpkin, arms flailing as you fell back. Natasha attempting to stable you, but ended up losing her own balance, tumbling down on top of your solid build.
You both froze, her body pressed against yours, faces inches apart, your breaths mingling. Her hair had fallen across her face, and you reached up instinctively to brush it away, your hand lingering on her cheek.
Her eyes softened, and the playfulness faded into something deeper, something you hadn’t allowed yourself to acknowledge until this moment.
“Nat,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.
She didn’t say anything, just leaned in, her lips brushing against yours in a soft, tentative kiss. It was gentle, sweet, and everything you hadn’t known you needed. When she pulled back, she was smiling, her forehead resting against yours.
“You should smile more,” she murmured, her thumb brushing lightly over your cheek. “It looks good on you.”
You chuckled softly, feeling the tension melt away as you sat up, arms propping you up, her moving swiftly to your lap as you blushed moving your nose to brush hers “Only when you’re around.”
Natasha grinned, leaning in to kiss you again, this time slower, more deliberate. And in that moment, amidst the pumpkin guts and the chaos of Halloween, you realized that maybe—just maybe—you had finally found a place where you belonged.
And that place was with her.
339 notes · View notes
pascalispretty · 2 months ago
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the feeling is mutual
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Sonny Carisi x F!Reader
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 4.9k
Tags: pining, idiots in love, cowgirl sex, Sonny's praise kink, only one bed trope
Summary: You've had a crush on your colleague for years. You go to a work conference with him, and fate fucks with you by making sure you get a room with just the one bed.
A/N: Soooooooo I started working on this back in October 2022, at the request of the lovely @misscharlielulu. Life intervened, and I kinda got the writing yips, but when I saw that @storiesofsvu's bingo had an 'Only One Bed' square I was determined to finish it. Unbeta'd like whoa, so please be gentle! (ao3).
You should have been suspicious of Benson’s offer to send you to the conference from the beginning. It had been presented to you nicely enough - a long weekend in Boston, paid for by the department so you could attend the Conference on Crimes Against Women. It hadn’t taken much persuading to get you to agree to go, especially when you found out Carisi was also going. 
That was before the drive from hell. The two of you had left as soon as you finished work for the day, only to almost immediately hit nasty traffic. What should have been a four-hour journey had taken almost seven thanks to an accident just past the Connecticut state line. After swapping driver duties with Sonny somewhere outside of Hartford, you’d found your eyelids starting to get heavy, but had resolved to stay awake. It wasn’t fair to Carisi for you to sleep while he drove. 
You have no idea how long you’ve been dozing when a gentle nudge to your arm wakes you. 
“Hey, I think we’re finally here,” Sonny says as you rub your eyes. So much for not sleeping. You’re relieved to see that he’s pulling into the parking garage below the hotel, but it's short-lived.
“God, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” You roll your neck, wincing at the crick that’s developed from resting your head on the window. 
“It’s fine, I figured you could use it. The Spellman case has us all working late.” He’s right; the case was drawing plenty of media attention, and you’d all been racking up plenty of OT trying to solve it. The two of you had spent part of the drive debating it, and whether there was a way to get the stupid, invasive podcast taken down. 
You both grab your bags and make your way to the elevator. Pressing the button for the lobby, you try and fail to suppress a yawn. 
“Sorry,” you apologise again. “It’s been a while since I’ve had a good night’s sleep.” 
“The feeling is mutual, don’t worry. I can’t even remember the last time I woke up and actually felt rested,” Carisi says lightly, giving you a soft, understanding smile. You try not to think too deeply about the way it makes your stomach twist - or, for that matter, how good he looks in his new camel coat.  
“Tell me about it,” you groan. The elevator spills the two of you out into a deserted lobby, and you do a double-take when you look out of the enormous windows at the front of the building. 
“Oh, yeah. It started snowing about an hour ago,” Sonny says, cutting himself off with a yawn.  Outside, the snow is coming down thick and fast, already sticking to the ground. You can just about see the glow of a few headlights, but beyond that, the world has turned to a soft dove grey. 
There’s a harried-looking woman behind the concierge desk; the Conference attracts cops from all over the country, you wouldn’t be surprised if the hotel was booked out by the various agencies and precincts. 
“Hi, we have two rooms booked for us. Should be under the name Benson?” Sonny asks the concierge, searching on his phone for the confirmation email Liv had forwarded to you both. The concierge types something on the computer sitting on her desk and frowns. 
“I got one room under that name. Any other name you might have used?” 
“No, Liv definitely said she booked them under her name,” you tell her, glancing at Sonny as he turns his phone to show the woman behind the desk. 
“Our Lieutenant definitely booked us two rooms, look,” Sonny tries, and the two of you exchange a frown. The concierge scans the email, then her own screen again. 
“I don’t know what to tell you. The system only has one booking under Benson. It’s the only room left in the hotel; we’re booked solid because of this conference.” You and Sonny exchange another look. 
“I mean - I don’t mind sharing if you don’t?” You tug your lower lip between your teeth, trying to think of another solution that doesn’t involve sharing a bedroom with the colleague you have a very inappropriate crush on. Sonny taps his fingers on the desk and looks again at the concierge as though he’s hoping she’ll be able to conjure another room out of nowhere. 
“I wouldn’t wanna make you uncomfortable.” He sounds so earnest, and you want to pinch his cheeks and tell him he could never, but instead you shrug. 
“It’s fine, you won’t. Unless you snore, or sleepwalk or something,” you tease, and he grins. 
“I’ve never had any complaints,” he says, turning back to the concierge. Is it your imagination, or is he blushing slightly? “Can we get the keys, please?” The woman looks relieved that the two of you have resolved the situation between yourselves, and seemingly can’t press the keycards into your hands fast enough. 
“You’re in 2342; take the elevator to the fourth floor and turn right.” The two of you thank her and pick your bags up again. 
“Should we say something to the Lieutenant?” You offer as the two of you make your way upstairs. “She might be getting charged for both rooms or something.” 
“Yeah, probably. Maybe the hotel thought she meant two beds, not two rooms?” Sonny runs a hand through his hair; the product’s grip on his greying locks has relaxed, leaving it looking soft and touchable. 
“Maybe,” you say distractedly, stopping in front of door 2342. “I think this is us.” You try the keycard and are relieved when the light on the lock turns green. 
“I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to get some sleep.” Carisi takes your bag as you push open the door, and you smile quickly at him over your shoulder. 
“Oh no, the feeling is definitely mutual. I feel like I could sleep for a week-” You abruptly cut yourself off when you turn the light on and get a glimpse of the room. It’s a perfectly nice room–if anything slightly nicer than what you had been expecting on the department’s dime. It’s decently sized, with large windows and a flatscreen on the wall. There’s even a comfy-looking overstuffed armchair by one of the windows. 
The only problem is that there’s only one bed. 
Your cheeks burn as you realise your mistake. You had assumed that the hotel had accidentally put you in one room with two beds, instead of two rooms with one bed each. 
“Oh shit, Carisi, I’m sorry-” You start, walking deeper into the room so he has space to enter behind you and see what the problem is. The door clicks closed behind him, and you swallow thickly. 
“Oh. Uh-” he rakes his hand through his hair again. “You take the room. I’ll find somewhere else.” He offers, but you’re already shaking your head. 
“Where? The concierge said they were full, and there’s no way you can get a decent room on this short notice.” You worry your bottom lip between your teeth again, trying to walk the fine line between sounding considerate and desperate. As much as the thought of sharing a bed with Carisi makes you panic, you don’t want to kick him out into the cold. 
“No, it’s fine. I can sleep in the car if I can’t find anywhere; I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable or anything.” It’s so characteristically sweet that you roll your eyes. Crossing over to the window, you pull the drapes aside just enough to see the snow still falling thick and fast outside. 
“You are not sleeping in your car in a blizzard, Carisi. It’s fine, I’ll sleep on the armchair.” You grab a pillow from the bed before he can argue and throw it towards the chair. “Crank the thermostat up and lend me a blanket from the bed, and I’ll be fine.”
“I’m not letting you sleep in a chair,” he says, though he does move over to the thermostat to change it. “I’ll take the chair.”
“You’re like seven feet tall, there’s no way you’re sleeping in the chair.” 
“I’m six foot even, and a night sleeping there won’t kill me. In the morning, I’ll look for a room in a different hotel or something.” You open your mouth to argue with him again, but he cuts you off. “You’re not changing my mind. I have three sisters, I know how to be stubborn.” 
“Fine. Better than you trying to drive around in this storm, as tired as you are.” You throw your hands up in exaggerated defeat, before starting to tug one of the sheets off the bed. Carisi moves to the other side of the bed to help you, stripping the top sheet off and tossing it onto the armchair. 
“You wanna use the bathroom first?” Your bags are still sitting by the door, and you pick up your overnight bag and set it on the bed. For a brief moment you panic as you start to unzip it; what pyjamas did you pack in your hurry this morning? You can’t remember if they’re relatively normal looking, or the grotty but oh-so-cosy ones you usually reserve for being ill or on your period. 
“Nah, you go ahead.” Out of the corner of your eye, you can see him shaking the sheet out to drape it over the armchair. Your hands finally close on your pyjamas, and you take them and your toiletry bag into the bathroom. The bathroom is, just like the room, nicer than you had expected it to be. The little soaps and shampoos are brands you actually recognise, and you’re delighted to see that your room has a shower and a tub. Maybe tomorrow you can have a nice, long soak and pretend this mortifying night never happened. 
It doesn’t take you long to throw your hair up in a messy bun and wash the remains of your makeup off your face. You strip quickly out of your work clothes, hesitating a moment before deciding to keep your bra on. Slipping on the grey tank top you’d brought as a pyjama top, you’re a little relieved that the pyjamas you’d grabbed at random from the drawer were plain and not embarrassingly old or cutesy. 
Your relief is short-lived. When you go to shake out the folded-up black leggings, you realise with dawning horror that they’re not your leggings at all. In your hurry to pack this morning, you’d grabbed a pair of pyjama shorts, black jersey with a little lacy trim. Your face burns flaming hot again as you stare at them. You have no other choice - your only other bottoms are work clothes, and a pair of jeans - but they show off more of your leg than you’re really comfortable with your colleague seeing. 
Cursing yourself for leaving packing until this morning you reluctantly slide the shorts on, trying to tug them down to cover a little more of your thighs. Clutching your clothes to your chest, you take a deep breath before stepping out of the bathroom. 
Carisi has been busy while you’ve been gone. He’s made a makeshift bed for himself on the armchair, and moved the bags away from the door. Your purse is sitting beside your weekend bag, and his own bag is open on the desk. He’s currently searching through it, and you can't help staring a little. His coat, jacket and tie are gone and he’s rolled his shirt sleeves up, exposing his forearms. You swallow thickly and drag your eyes away with difficulty. You need to grow up. 
The bathroom door closes behind you, catching Sonny’s attention. He looks up from whatever he’s searching for in his bag and does a double-take when he sees you. 
“Why are you wearing shorts during a blizzard?” He teases, unable to help the laugh that escapes him. “Did you leave packing til the last minute again?” Your cheeks are probably hot enough to counter whatever cold you might feel from the weather, and you glare at him. 
“Shut up. They were folded, I thought they were leggings.” You dump the clothes in your arms into your open bag and dig around for your phone charger. Sonny chuckles again and shakes his head. 
“You sure you’re gonna be warm enough? You can borrow my hoodie if you want.” You’re sorely tempted to take him up on the offer. The burgundy hoodie he’s holding out to you looks cosy, and it undoubtedly smells amazing, but you can’t. You need to get over this, whatever this is. 
“I’ll be okay.” With your phone charger in hand, you move your bags onto the floor by the bed and set about plugging your phone in to charge overnight. Sonny quietly excuses himself to the bathroom, and you take advantage of having the room to yourself to clamber into bed without showing any more of your legs. You almost groan once you settle down under the blankets; this bed is comfortable. It’s almost enough to make you glad that Sonny insisted on sleeping on the armchair instead of you. Almost. Once you’re suitably snuggled in, you unlock your phone and type out a quick message to Benson explaining the room situation. 
It doesn’t take Carisi long to return from the bathroom, and you let out an inelegant snort when you see him. 
“Why are you wearing shorts during a blizzard?” You parrot teasingly, raising an eyebrow at him. Sonny’s wearing a Fordham tee and a pair of cotton boxer shorts. He has the good grace to flush, and he shrugs. 
“It’s what I usually sleep in. I run warm.” 
“You can turn the thermostat down if it’s gonna be too warm?” You offer. “I feel like a dick taking the bed and making you too hot.” He flashes you that soft smile again. 
“You’re still just in shorts. Sure you don’t want my hoodie?” Carisi sets his folded clothes on the desk by his bag and waits for your answer. 
“No, I’ll be fine. Turn the thermostat down a few degrees.” The room isn’t even that cold at the moment, and you’re sure you won’t feel it if the temperature drops a little while you sleep. Sonny obliges, fiddling with the thermostat again before settling down onto his armchair bed. 
“Is it okay with you if I set an alarm for half nine?” The conference kicks off at eleven; an hour and a half should be plenty of time to shower and find some breakfast before you have to go downstairs. 
“Yeah sure,” Carisi says, his reply trailing off into a yawn. “G’night.” You flip the switch by the bed, plunging the room into darkness. 
“Night, Carisi.” 
You really try to fall asleep. The bed is so comfortable, and you’re so tired. You had fallen asleep in the car, sitting up with the radio blaring. You’re not sure why it evades you now. The minutes tick by, and you can hear Sonny moving around in the chair, trying to find a comfortable position. Perhaps it's guilt keeping you awake, you reason. 
You’re not sure how much time has passed when you break the silence. 
“Carisi?” You half-whisper, not wanting to wake him if he’s asleep. 
“Yeah?” He sounds tired, and the guilt overrides any embarrassment you might feel. 
“Will you just come and sleep here?” The question hangs in the air, and there’s a long pause while you wait for Sonny’s answer. “I don’t have cooties, Carisi, you can sleep next to me.” 
“No, I know, but-” He pauses, and you hear him shift again. “Are you sure you don’t mind?” 
“Positive.” It’s so stupid of you. You’ve had a crush on Carisi since you first laid eyes on him; inviting him to sleep beside you is an unnecessary form of self-torture. But you know you’ll feel even worse tomorrow having to look at the deep shadows under his eyes from a sleepless and uncomfortable night in the chair. 
You hear him sigh softly. A moment later, the mattress dips as he settles into the bed. Sonny’s keeping his distance, but you’re still painfully aware of his body in bed beside you. It’s unbearably intimate, and if it wouldn’t make you look like a lunatic after telling him how fine you were with him getting in, you’d take a pillow and go and sleep in the tub. 
Annoyed with yourself, you roll over onto your side, facing away from him. As idiotic as you might be, at least you won’t have to deal with the guilt of depriving him of a good night’s sleep. Beside you, his breathing is evening out. Maybe at least one of you will sleep well. 
******
You wake up feeling confused. You have no idea how you managed to fall asleep, or how long you’ve slept for. You’re also very preoccupied with the fact that you and Carisi appear to be spooning. 
Sonny’s arm is slung over your waist and his body is curled around yours from behind, holding you close. His nose is pressed against the hinge of your jaw, his breath warm on your neck.  Your bare legs are tangled together, and you’re so overwhelmed by the feel of so much of his skin against yours that it takes you a moment to realise what woke you. 
Carisi is hard. 
The line of his erection is pressing against the curve of your ass, and you nearly choke on your own tongue at the feeling. You take a deep breath and try to make sense of what’s happening. The two of you must have rolled together at some point in the night, and Sonny’s reaction must just be morning wood. 
Not that being in Sonny’s arms is unpleasant. He’s warm and solid against you, and he smells good; something clean and masculine and him. Closing your eyes again, you try to figure out what to do. Before you can settle on an idea, Sonny’s arm briefly tightens around your waist, only to suddenly slide off. 
“Oh fuck-” Carisi practically throws himself backwards, away from you. Sitting up in bed, you turn to look at him as he tries to extricate himself from the sheets and scramble out of bed. “Oh fuck, I’m so sorry.” You follow him, managing to grab his hand before he can move away from the side of the bed. 
“Carisi, it’s okay. It’s okay, you were asleep-” You start, kneeling on the bed in front of him and holding his hand tightly within your own. He’s shaking his head before you even get the first few words out, those beautiful blue eyes of his wide and distraught. 
“It’s not okay,” he says, refusing to look down at you. “I was practically molesting you in your sleep-”
“Stop, you weren’t molesting me,” you try to argue, but Carisi ignores you. 
“I’ll call the Lieutenant on my way back to Manhattan, let her know. God, this isn’t how I wanted you to find out. But you never have to see me again, I promise,” he rambles, trying to free his hand from your grasp. You don’t let go, giving it a squeeze instead. 
“Calm down, take a breath. How you wanted me to find out what?” You adjust your position on your knees, barely able to breathe yourself. Sonny’s palm is hot and damp against yours, and you can see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows thickly. 
“Find out that I liked you.” Carisi manages eventually, still steadfastly refusing to look down at you. Your heart is hammering against your ribcage, and your blood roars so loudly in your ears that you’re not sure you heard him right. You know he likes you, you’ve been friends for years. But he’s saying it in a way that conveys so much more than that, and you suck in a breath. 
“You like me?” 
“I- yeah. And now I’ve ruined it, and made you uncomfortable-” he starts again, and you roll your eyes. You bring your free hand up to his cheek, and the gentle touch is what finally makes him meet your eyes. 
“Dominick. You haven’t made me uncomfortable. Really, you haven’t.” That finally silences him, your use of his real name catching his attention, though it doesn’t stop his eyes from searching for any hint to the contrary in your face. You take a deep breath, choosing your next words carefully. “And…and you haven’t ruined anything either.” 
Before you can talk yourself out of it, you lean up to kiss him. 
It’s not much more than a peck, a soft brush of your lips against his own ones. You pull back just a little, your noses almost brushing. 
“I’m okay,” you whisper. “You have no idea how much I enjoyed waking up in your arms.” There’s a silence so deep that you’d swear you should be able to hear the snow falling outside. Those lovely eyes of his bore into yours, sending your heart hammering even harder. After a long pause, his free hand comes up to cup your jaw with deliberate slowness, giving you time to move away. 
Sonny’s thumb sweeps gently over your cheek as he lowers his head and kisses you. His lips are soft and full against yours, testing at first and deepening the kiss when you slide your free arm around him to pull him closer. A quiet sound of contentment escapes your throat as Sonny dips his tongue into your mouth, finally letting go of your hand so he can grasp your waist. 
You can’t seem to get close enough to him, even with your chests pressed flush against one another. The kiss turns from careful to desperate as years of pent-up attraction are finally given an outlet.
It’s impossible to tell who moves first to lie down on the bed, whether you pull him down or he pushes, but you end up lying parallel to the headboard with Sonny on top of you. Your mind can barely reconcile that your longtime crush reciprocates your feelings, much less the warm weight of his body pressed against you. 
Wanting to feel more of him, you slip one of your hands beneath the hem of his t-shirt and run your fingertips over his back. He shivers at the delicate touch, a sensitivity you mentally file away for later. Your legs fall open, and you choke back a whine when you feel the hard line of his cock press against you once more. 
It’s so much. You want to feel him everywhere, to keep exploring him with your hands and mouth. 
“Can I?” You ask, grabbing the hem of his t-shirt and pulling gently. He follows your lead, letting you pull the shirt over his head and discard it onto the floor. He was telling the truth earlier; he does run warm, his bare skin hot to the touch as your hands roam his back and sides. 
One of Sonny’s hands drops down to hitch your leg over his hip, his large hand squeezing your thigh. 
“I love your legs,” he murmurs. The kisses have left you breathless, but you still whine when he stops. Your hands sink into his soft hair as he shifts to press kisses down the column of your throat. You don’t mean to pull his hair when he kisses a particularly sensitive spot, but when he groans against the delicate skin you take it as your cue to do it again. 
“Want you, Dominick,” you sigh against his forehead, rocking your hips to grind against him. You feel his breath catch in his throat, his own hips stutter against yours. There are too many layers of clothes between the two of you, and you do your best to wriggle out of your t-shirt without displacing Carisi. 
Like the gentleman that he is, he helps you out. His hands cover yours to take over, pulling the soft cotton over your head. Your hands sink back into his hair almost immediately.
“Why’d you wear a bra to sleep in?” He asks, a soft smile playing on his lips. It’s so infuriatingly handsome that you want to drag him back down for more kisses, but you know that won’t get you out of your clothes any faster.
“Didn’t want to risk you seeing my nipples through my shirt,” you explain breathily as he ducks down to kiss over the tops of your breasts while his hands work at the clasp. 
“Think I’m about to see a lot more than that, doll,” he mumbles against your skin. It makes you giggle, in spite of yourself. The two of you shed your clothes as quickly as you can while still staying as close as possible, too focused on removing the remaining barriers between you to care too much about the undignified scramble to strip. 
“I wanna ride you,” you manage between kisses, and Sonny nearly falls off the bed in his eagerness to oblige you. He settles with his back against the headboard, watching you with hazy eyes as you grab a condom out of your purse. 
“C’mere,” he says softly, holding his hands out to help you get comfortable in his lap. He hisses when you roll the condom down over his cock, the hand he’s resting on your hip squeezing reflexively. 
“You’re so gorgeous,” you tell him, slowly pumping your hand down, then back up. He does look gorgeous out of his clothes, all lean and long-limbed. “You have no idea how long I’ve thought about this.” 
Sonny’s other arm loops around your waist, pulling you just a little closer. 
“I’ve been thinking about this since we met,” he admits, his voice breathless with arousal. You rest your free hand on his shoulder as you line him up with your entrance and slowly start to sink down. It pulls a loud moan out of both of you, the sound echoing around the room, so much louder than the whispers and gasps that had come before. 
“Oh God, so have I, Sonny-” you manage, screwing your eyes closed. It’s been a while, and the lack of foreplay probably wasn’t wise given the fact that Carisi was bigger than you’d imagined. Not that you’d made a habit of imagining this, in trying to deal with your crush. Instead of sliding down smoothly the rest of the way onto him, you roll your hips, taking a little more of his length on each pass. 
Sonny’s a mess under you. His hands clutch tight at your hips, and when you manage to open your eyes again, you see he has his head flung back against the headboard.
“You feel so good, Doll. Christ, you’re so fucking wet and we haven’t even done anything-” he cuts himself off with a shuddering groan as he finally bottoms out inside you. The tip of him is pressing up against that spot inside you that makes your toes curl, and it sends a swell of bliss coursing through you. 
“You have such a perfect dick,” you tell him, enjoying the flush that intensifies on his face as he registers what you said. You lift yourself up just a little, an inch at best, and sink slowly back down, your eyes rolling back in pleasure. 
You’re not sure if it’s the best adjective, but you need to tell him just how good he feels. 
In fact, the two of you can’t seem to shut up. Even when you start riding him in earnest, the headboard bumping against the wall with every stroke, neither of you can stop talking. It’s like every time you’ve wanted to tell him how hot he is over the last three years is spilling out, along with endless praise for how good he feels. He gives it right back, telling you how perfect and sexy and hot you are in between telling you how much he wants to eat you out. 
“I’d be so good at it, please doll, I just wanna show you how bad I want it,” he babbles, his hair damp with sweat at the temples. 
You’re panting with every breath. Sonny leans forward to nuzzle into your neck, kissing and licking and sucking at the delicate skin there. Your nails dig into his shoulders when he drags his teeth over a particularly sensitive spot, and the groan he makes vibrates through your skin and straight down to your core. 
“God, Dominick, yes,” you nearly sob. “So good with your mouth already, want you to kiss me everywhere…” You can’t finish the thought, but it wrenches another groan out of Sonny. You haven’t thought about a next time, whether this is a one-off or if cooler heads will prevail back in New York. 
Later, the two of you can talk for real. You’ll wake up feeling better rested than you have in years, naked in Sonny’s arms, and talk about what happened, you promise yourself. 
Right now, there’s just the two of you discovering how much you enjoy each other, how badly you’ve both wanted each other. The two of you just fit together, like it’s the easiest, most natural thing in the world. And all the pleasure you feel is magnified a thousandfold by the fact that your crush wasn’t unrequited at all, that Sonny wants you just as much as you want him. 
You sink your hand back into his soft hair and ride him faster, utterly drunk on the noises he’s making. Dominick’s mouth wanders, kissing lines up your neck and licking messily at your nipples and nipping gently at your earlobe. In between, he murmurs about how 
A real conversation can wait; right now, you want to see what it’ll take for you to leave him speechless. 
Taglist:
@avengersfan25 @misscharlielulu @apenny4thots @irishavengersassemble
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idiopath-fic-smile · 3 months ago
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so literally eight years ago i posted a snippet of a modern retelling of Much Ado About Nothing set in a student co-op and for no particular reason, the concept is tickling my brain right now. so uh here, have this? i guess?
“So, Ursula, my dear,” said Lee, taking the seat across from her at the dinner table. “My fluffy little crumpet. My buttery brioche bun. My tangy slice of pumpernickel—”
Ursula squinted up from her Anthro reading. “Uh-oh,” she said. “You only call me bread when I’m in trouble.”
“Happened to glance at the meeting notes this morning,” Lee continued, her voice rising. “You’ve got anything you wanna explain or defend?”
Ursula flicked her highlighter from one finger to the other, determined to play it cool. “I think it’s all pretty self-explanatory. Which meeting notes, exactly, were you glancing at?” She peeked out of the corner of her eye to check how this was going down. 
Poorly. 
Lee stared at her, apparently at a loss for words, which was not a great look for the house president.
“You did this more than once.”
“I take notes every meeting, Lee,” she said, as levelly as possible given how Lee’s ‘I’m not angry, just disappointed’ Mom vibes were oozing from every pore. “It’s my job, as house secretary.”
“Is it?” said Lee tightly. “Is it your job?” She whisked opened her laptop and read aloud: 
“Benedick’s eyes blazed with passionate fury. His nostrils quivered. ‘Well,’ he said in a low growl, hair resplendent under the environmentally friendly fluorescent lights, ‘personally, I think if anything, there's not ENOUGH lentils—’ Beatrice gasped. It was so wrong, and yet…”
Ursula winced. “‘Said in a low growl’ is wordy. I should’ve just put ‘growled’.”
Lee pinched the bridge of her nose. “Ursula,” she began, “just how much of our official co-op house notes, which by the way are formally submitted each month to the Co-op Board, are written as if Benedick and Beatrice’s stupid arguments are some kind of torrid Harlequin paperback?”
“That depends.” Ursula steepled her fingers, dropping the highlighter in the process. “How much of my notes do you have access to?”
“All of them,” Lee gritted out. “Because they’re public. That’s what I’m saying.”
 “Look,” said Ursula. “I don’t think I said this when I ran, but I wanted to be house secretary in the first place because a lot of the time, taking notes is the only way I can make myself concentrate. I would literally be taking notes during the meeting anyway. It’s an ADHD thing.” 
Ursula sighed. “And pretty early on, it became clear that meetings in Messina House are basically just a Sexual Tension Thunderdome for Benedick and Beatrice. They go back and forth for pages sometimes. I can feel every electrical connection in my brain fighting to zone out. So yeah. For a while I rewrote their fights as rhymed couplets, for a very short bit of time I had Balthazar set them to sea shanties, and since last December, I’ve been transcribing very close to their actual words, with very close to their actual intentions, plus just a tiny bit of genre trimmings. If they’re gonna waste my Saturday and test my focus, I’m doing what I can to stay awake and keep my typing fingers limber. I’m up to 75 WPM, by the way.”
“December?” Lee repeated. “Ursula, it’s October. You’ve been doing this for over a semester?” A terrible wave of realization seemed to sweep over her just then, regarding the general pacing and content of a standard Harlequin. “Please tell me,” she whispered, “there is no sex in the meeting notes—”
“There’s no sex in the meeting notes,” Ursula interrupted. “Per se,” she added under her breath.
Lee’s lips were pressed together into a thin line. “One year,” she said. “I want one year where nobody drives a motorcycle down the hallway or accidentally mixes up chlorine gas during their bathroom clean, or spends almost a full calendar year slipping smut into the public record—!”
“Excuse you,” said Ursula. “Smut’s a different genre altogether. This is romance. Slow-burn, enemies to lovers.”
Lee threw up her hands, nearly knocking over her laptop. “What are you gonna do if Benedick or Beatrice sees this?” “Oh.” Ursula froze. “Uh-oh.”
“Yeah, uh-oh,” she said. “Look, clearly there’s only one thing to do.”
Ursula nodded. “Right, we have to execute a series of far-fetched shenanigans designed to turn those two fighting fish into a pair of cooing lovebirds, stat.”
“No,” said Lee. “What? No, you need to go back and rewrite all of—”
Pedro slid into the room in his socks. “Oh sweet, are we hooking up Benedick with Beatrice?”
“Hell yeah,” said Ursula. They high-fived.
Lee closed her laptop with a snap. “Ursula, what are the odds,” she said, “that you actually buckle down and rewrite all of the meeting notes to read like they were written in the genre of meeting notes?”
“Oh, like, zero,” said Ursula, as Pedro chimed in, 
“Yeah, that will not happen.”
Lee looked despairingly back and forth between Ursula and Pedro. “What do you think is the likelihood that playing love gods will like, actually, genuinely work?”
“Twenty percent,” said Ursula.
Margaret glanced up from the other end of the table, where she was gluing together a collage of every restaurant on campus that had ever given her food poisoning. It was for class, was the thing.
Art school kids, man.
“We’re tricking Benedick and Beatrice into giving themselves over to their intense chemistry?” asked Margaret.
“Thirty percent,” said Ursula, because Margaret was inscrutable much of the time but surely they would have a fighting chance with more of the Humanities on their side.
At “intense chemistry,” Lee shuddered. “That reminds me,” she said, standing and scooping up her laptop, “I need to post a sign in the basement bathroom warning people not to mix bleach with acid.”
“Are you in?” said Pedro as Lee attempted to slip out the door. “Love Gods?”
“Jesus Christ,” said Lee.
“Not a love god,” Margaret announced. She had found the sequins, and was applying them with enthusiasm. “Except in the general Peace on Earth sense, I guess.”
“I’m texting Hero,” said Ursula, digging for her phone. “She knows Beatrice better than anyone. She’ll have tips. That puts our potential success rate at 45%, easy.”
“If we’ve got Hero, we’ve got Claudia,” Pedro added. “And she’s been BFF with Benedick since freshman year.”
“This is a terrible plan,” Lee muttered. “Yeah,” said Ursula, “but you implied it yourself. If, uh, certain parties see my meeting notes, they will murder me. Do you really want a fellow co-oper’s blood on your hands?”
Just then, Benedick burst into the room, Beatrice on his heels.
“I’m sorry,” Beatrice shouted, “are you genuinely trying to argue that soybeans are the superior legume? Soybeans? Over chickpeas? Over kidney beans? Hell, over peas?”
“Soy milk,” said Benedick, counting on his fingers, “silken tofu, miso, tempeh, firm tofu—”
Beatrice took a step closer to him, eyes flashing, “I have never in my life had tempeh that tasted like anything other than an evil Cliff Bar.”
“It’s not my fault your tastebuds were installed backwards,” said Benedick. “This from the woman who still, in the year of some people’s lord 2024, thinks lattes are ‘too trendy’—”
“Espresso is a waste of coffee grounds,” said Beatrice in a low, dangerous voice.
Benedick gasped. “You take that back.”
Beatrice took a step closer. “Coldbrew has more flavor and more caffeine.”
“Coldbrew,” Benedick echoed, stepping even closer. “You’re defending that swill over a nice mocha? Get latte’s name out of your mouth.”
Benedick and Beatrice were standing almost nose to nose, breathing hard.
“You know what?” said Lee from the door. “Ursula? Fuck it, I’m in.”
Ursula whooped. Margaret reached for the glitter glue. Benedick and Beatrice visibly both ran through their mental rolodexes of coffee-related insults. 
From the entryway came the distant revving of a motorcycle engine. Borachio was no doubt doing wheelies in the foyer again, but that was a problem for house presidents, not innocent house secretaries who had done no wrong, thought Ursula as she returned to her reading and her growing mental to-do list.
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