#I’ve already failed tbh

[gatorinator]

The problem with having scrupulosity/religious ocd is that you always want to make the right choice/do the right thing/CTR and all that jazz. Which is great until your having a moral crisis on whether you should wait in a possibly 30 minute line to get JDawgs or go to institute (which also offers dinner but you missed it bc you went to the gym later with your sister so you were already running late). And your standing in a crowd of like a hundred people and your about to have a full panick attack.

[nullians]

One of my favourite past time activities is listening to songs clearly made for romantic relationships upon creation and seeing how much can I actually bend the lyrics into sth platonic/familial 😶

[nellectronic]

10 minutes of walking through the cold and intermittent sludge for what’s probably going to be a 15 minute meeting followed by another 10 minutes of walking through the cold and intermittent sludge back home. i hate my job

[fingertipsmp3]

There are two wolves inside me. One is trying to convince me to do extensive research for the job interview tomorrow and the other is saying “wing it”

[izzyy-stuff]

𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐃 - 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐈 𝐒𝐎𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐍

choi soobin x afab!reader

summary: After you found out the smarty-pants in your class was in love with you you thought it would be fun to play around with him a bit, but things take a wrong turn when he is the only one you can text when you are horny and he doesn't hesitate and runs to you, making you feel better than any of your ex boyfriends could.

words count: 3.9k

warnings: smut content, she/her pronouns used twice (in the texting part) sorry 🙏, oral, vaginal fingering, unprotected sex (don't!!), cum eating, gentle sex, squiting, idk tbh

You glanced to your side, watching the black-haired boy on the other side of the classroom as he wrote down some notes. If you were to be honest, you weren’t paying any attention to what the teacher was saying, so you had no idea what he was writing down either. But it didn't matter anyway, you knew he would let you copy his notes later. 

It was one of the perks of having the class’s smarty-pants be in love with you. You chuckled when you saw him look your way too, smiling at him before you turned away again. 

“What's going on there?” The black-haired girl next to you asked, her eyebrow raised as she pointed at the male on the other side of the class. “Why do you two keep stealing glances at each other?” 

“You know Yeonjun, right?” You asked, watching as the girl next to you nodded. “Who doesn't,” your best friend scoffed. “What does he have to do with anything?” 

“Well, he is the one that told me last week our little nerdy here has a crush on me. It all makes sense now if you think about it. I couldn't wrap my head around why he would always send me the lesson notes when I asked for them but not to others. I told Ryan he could ask Soob because I thought he wouldn't have any problems with it, but it turns out he only sent them to me to get me to like him, or something,” You explained, watching as your best friend laughed quietly. 

“It's kind of cute though that he does that.” 

“But I don't want ‘cute’ anymore,” you rolled your eyes. “I want someone who can actually make me cum and not just stare at me questioning why I wouldn't finish as if he even tried.” 

“Okay, I know the last boy was a fail as fuck, literally, but who knows,” the black-haired girl shrugged. “You want to tell me you think he of all people could make me cum?” You scoffed. “Please, he probably hasn't fucked a girl in his life.” 

You said that, but God, you had no idea what was coming your way. 

“Who are we gossiping about?” You turned as you heard the male’s voice, scoffing at how needy he was for the tea. “No one,” you shook your head. “Your rival,” your best friend grinned, answering instead when you didn’t do so. The blond boy scoffed, looking at the black-haired boy. “Oh yeah, I am so sure he didn’t fuck a girl - or anyone else - in his life,” he agreed. 

“I am pretty sure I’ve been with a girl more times than he has,” Ryan next to him nodded, joining their conversation. “Kinda crazy,” you commented, laughing. Before you could say anything else, you were stopped by the teacher hitting the board with his hand, making you look his way. “As I was saying,” he started his speech again, giving you a warning look before he turned around, facing the board again so he could write down a few things. 

Your head fell on the table soon after out of boredom, and before you could even start paying attention to what the teacher was talking about, the bell rang, announcing the end of the lesson. 

“Okay, guys, who is coming with me to grab lunch?” Your best friend turned towards you and the two boys behind you. “I am passing,” you mumbled immediately, not even fully sitting up and simply turning your head towards her. “I am going,” Ryan proclaimed, already standing up from his place, the blond following him right after. 

“Okay, I see you guys later, then,” you smiled at them, waving them off as they left the classroom. You knew you should get up too and move to your next class, but you were starting to feel unwell, and the thought of getting up sounded terrible. You sighed, closing your eyes for a few seconds. You knew this classroom was empty for another hour or so anyway. 

“Hey, are you alright?” You opened your eyes again upon hearing the soft voice and feeling the tap on your shoulder, blinking a few times to make your eyes focus again. “Mhm, sure I am,” you mumbled, sitting up straight as you looked around. The class was empty by now, only the two of you were left there. “Why? Were you worried about me?” You chuckled, teasing him. Suddenly, it was as if your headache completely disappeared when you saw the nervous look on his face. “Relax, I am joking,” you shook your head, but couldn’t hide your smile. 

“I don’t want to annoy you,” you started, slowly packing your stuff as he stood beside you, waiting like a puppy. “But do you think you could give me today’s notes, Soob?” 

“You-” he gulped, trying to ignore the nickname. There was simply something about you calling him Soob. “I don’t want it for free though. You could consider it as me owing you one and helping you when you’d need it?” You suggested as you stood up, grabbing your now packed bag. “Uhm, sure,” he nodded, not even paying full attention to what you were saying. 

“I’ll text you tonight about the notes then,” you beamed happily, looking like a completely different person as you placed your hand on his arm as a sign of thank you. You were devastated minutes ago, but whoever would see you now wouldn’t believe him if he told them so. Soobin wasn’t sure why, but he was glad you looked fine again. 

Soobin threw his bag on the side of his room, jumping into his bed immediately after the long day. He laid down on his back, simply staring at the ceiling of his room. He reached into his pocket for his phone, seeing two unread messages from his best friend. He opened his phone, staring at the two texts. “Look at Instagram” “Thank me later” There wasn’t much for him to question. Even though to many it might seem confusing, he knew exactly whose Instagram he should check. There was only one person that the two of them talked about together after all. 

The black-haired male clicked on the icon, waiting for the story to load for a second. Then his eyes widened at the sight. It was a picture of you, but not just any picture. He sat up immediately, looking properly at your body. You were wearing a white top, cropped slightly above your waist. He couldn’t help but notice you weren't wearing a bra underneath, your nipples showing through the fabric. Then he saw the black miniskirt, that you definitely pulled higher than you should. He gulped, remembering how you touched his arm earlier today, your fingers brushing on his skin as your hair fell in front of your face. 

He whined silently as he felt his boxers becoming tighter the more he stared at the picture, your body curves exposed for anyone to see. He shared the story with Yeonjun, his best friend, and immediately texted him how good you looked. 

Only, did he not know it wasn’t Yeonjun he shared the story to.  

Soobin stared at the messages, screaming as he turned his phone off faster than ever before. He couldn’t believe it. He just told you he needed you. There wasn’t anything worse that could be happening at the moment. Not to mention the image of your body was still stuck in his head, making him hard. 

He stared at the messages again, his heart fighting with his brain at that moment. He didn’t want to make you do anything, he felt like it would be too forced, even though you were the one suggesting it. But a part of him knew this was his only chance. There was no way he could get you differently. He knew about your dating history, so he also knew you had never been with anyone like him. It was always the boys like Yeonjun, who just understood how to talk to girls properly, how to make them fall for them. But he wasn’t like that, he had no idea what he was doing. 

And just like that, he was in front of your place, rethinking his decisions as he knocked on the front door, trying his best to ignore the boner in his pants that still hadn’t gone down. How could it be when you shared a picture like that with him?

“You came,” you mumbled as you opened the door, looking up at him. Soobin looked down on you, noticing the same top you had in the Instagram picture. He gulped, his eyes then falling on the bottom part of your body and the white panties that were the only thing you were wearing. “How could I not?” He whispered, making sure this picture would stay in his mind. 

You grabbed his hand as you took him inside, closing the door behind you immediately. It was only now that you noticed how big his hands were against yours. You just hoped he could use them too. 

Soobin blindly followed you to your bedroom, his mind full of thoughts about how he should go about this, while his eyes were stuck on your ass, unable to look away as you walked in front of him. 

“Can I-” he started as his eyes followed you while you sat on your bed. “You can do absolutely anything, Soob,” you interrupted him, watching as his face turned red. “Soob? Soobie?” You smirked, noticing what the nicknames did to him. “Is that what turns you on?” 

“Everything about you turns me on,” he admitted, slowly getting closer to you while you moved back, not taking your eyes off him. You didn’t say anything, you couldn’t. You simply bit your bottom lip as you found him above yourself, holding eye contact. This was becoming more intimate than you thought it would. 

“Is it okay for me to kiss you?” He wanted to assure himself one more time. You thought about it for a second, not wanting to give him any hope, but also desperately needing his lips on yours. You nodded to him in the end, grabbing the collar of his shirt and bringing him closer to yourself, pressing your lips on his, your mouth slightly opened which only made it easier for him. 

His right hand found its way to your boob, carefully sliding under your top, his cold fingers brushing over your nipple. You groaned into the kiss, clenching around nothing but thin air. It felt pathetic. He had barely touched you and you were already getting wet. 

Soobin left your mouth for a second, getting a disagreeing whine immediately that made him smile as he started placing wet kisses all over your neck, slowly moving down to your collarbone and then between your boobs. Your lips parted as you breathed out from the pleasure, raising your head to look at him. “Mhm, take it off,” you whispered, your hand reaching for his sleeve. He didn’t hesitate for a second and listened to you, taking his shirt off while you took down your own, exposing your breast to him completely. 

“Fuck,” he groaned at the sight, feeling more and more uncomfortable in his sweatpants. He ran his fingers through his hair, looking at your body one more time before his lips found their way to your breast again, his hand cupping one of them as he pressed kisses on your other boob, his tongue making wet circles around your nipple. 

“Fuck,” it was you groaning this time, quiet moans escaping your lips as your nipples became hard at his touch. “Soob, please,” you whined, throwing your head back into the pillow. “Please, what? Hm?” He asked, not even looking up and just continuing what he had been doing until now, his lips moving down again, leaving wet traces on your stomach now as his hands found their way to your waist. “I don’t know. Just- fuck,” you moaned out again when you felt his lips on your clit through your panties. 

“Just?” He asked again, looking up at you. You could swear you had never seen anything better in your life. The male was in between your legs, his breath landing right on your clit as he looked at you, absolute need in his eyes. 

“Just fuck me already,” you begged, watching as he took down your panties, his eyes fixated on your already leaking pussy. “I don’t think so,” he informed you, moving up again so he would face you. “I doubt you could take it just like that,” he whispered, moving his fingers to your lips. You didn’t need to hear anything else and immediately opened your mouth, sucking on his fingers. 

Before you could even register his actions you felt him slowly inserting his two fingers into you, carefully watching you. He did so to make sure he was doing everything right. You weren't completely wrong when you said he probably hasn’t been with a girl in his life. He couldn’t say he would have much experience, but all of his friends were sex addicts - and now he could finally see why - and they couldn’t keep their mouths shut every time the topic came up, so it was only natural for Soobin to catch on to a few things. 

You gasped, your eyes rolling back. You knew there was an obvious difference in your hand sizes but god, his fingers were bigger than you thought. “Fuck, curl them now,” you commanded, not daring to look down. He did as you said, feeling his precum on his boxers. He wanted nothing more but to fuck you right then and there, but he knew he had to wait. 

It didn’t take much longer for you to squirt on his fingers, especially after he added pressure to your clit too, his thumb making slow circles around while his fingers were stretching your inside. 

“Can I eat you out, please?” He asked, looking up at you again, his thumb still rubbing your clit slowly. “Please, y/n,” he begged, making you go crazy. You weren't sure if it was the way he begged you, the way he said your name, or because of his breath on your skin, but you couldn’t say no to him even if you wanted to. “God, please do,” you whined out and just like that, his tongue was pressed on your pussy right away, not wasting any second of the time he had with you. 

It had been months since you had cummed thanks to a boy, so you didn’t have any expectations for him when you invited him over. But you were wrong when you thought no boys knew how to take care of their girls anymore because he did exactly what he should, making you cum on his tongue a few minutes after he went down on you, not leaving your trembling cunt even then, letting you ride out your orgasm as his nose was pressed on your clit, his tongue carefully licking every last bit of your cum. 

“Soob,” you groaned, pulling his hair, making him finally raise his head and look at you. “Fuck, you’re so pretty,” he mumbled, going up again to kiss you. “And delicious,” he informed you, pressing his lips on yours. “Fuck, Soob, you’re too good,” you mumbled before you kissed him again, slowly sitting up. “Come closer,” you said, grabbing the hem of his pants, and pulling him closer at the same time. 

He groaned, his eyes shut tight, his lips unable to stay away from yours. You smirked into the kiss, your hand grabbing his trembling cock over his pants, making him moan. “I don’t usually do this but…” you started, breaking your kiss so you could look at his body properly. “You were so good earlier,” you praised him, not breaking your eye contact as you changed your position so you would be kneeling. “Pants off, baby,” 

That alone was enough to make him go crazy. You calling him baby just did something with his head. And with his dick. 

“Fuck,” You breathed out when you finally pulled down Soobin’s pants and boxers, your pussy clenching around nothing again. You knew he would be bigger because of his height, but this was more than you had expected. 

He cupped your cheeks, making you look up at him. “Are you sure?” You chuckled, simply nodding. “I can take good care of you too, you know,” you proclaimed, looking up at him as your right hand wrapped around his cock, not breaking your eye contact. You knew it must have been making him go insane. 

You started slowly, simply kissing his tip and licking off his precum. Then, you decided to try to take his full length into your mouth, but stopped shortly after getting to his half, already feeling like you were going to gag any second. There was no way you could do this. 

However, Soobin saw it differently. To him, it looked like you were playing with him, moving slowly and carefully on purpose to tease him. His hand found its way to your head, carefully tugging the hair that was getting in front of your face behind your ears before he held your chin up, making you look at him, his dick still in your mouth. “Think you can go faster, pretty? Please,” He asked, hoping maybe begging would help him. 

He groaned when he felt you suck harder, trying to go faster too but failing miserably. He chuckled at the sight, his hand in your hair so he could control the speed himself. “If you want to stop, just punch me, or something, okay? Try not to bite my dick off if you can’t take it anymore, though,” he told you, and before you could even look up at him again and question what he was talking about, he was moving with your head on his own as if you were just a toy to fulfill his needs. If you were honest, you were glad he did so. It was turning you on more. 

“Fuck, just a bit more,” he moaned out, thrusting his hips into your mouth as you sucked on him. He didn’t dare to look at you just yet, he felt like he would stop if he saw you in the moment, scared he might have been hurting you by determining his speed. 

When Soobin finally looked at you there were tears in your eyes, and his cum was all over your mouth. He cupped your cheeks, wiping the tears from your eyes with his thumbs. “Sorry,” he mumbled. You looked up at him, high on all the pleasure you felt until now thanks to him. God, you knew you needed to do this more often from now on. You licked the corner of your mouth, making sure not a single drop was wasted. 

“You’re not done yet, are you?” You asked, your puppy eyes almost making him cum again right away. “Fuck, no I am not,” he answered, leaning down to you to kiss you again. 

Soon after, Soobin found himself sitting on the edge of your bed, his back pressed against the white walls while you sat on him, your head on his shoulder, biting into his skin so you wouldn’t get too loud as he fucked you. Holding your ass, he was helping you remain at the same speed, moaning along with you. “So close, Soob,” you cried out. “Hold in a bit more,” he whispered, closing his eyes as he felt himself getting closer to finishing again, too. 

“Fuck,” you breathed out, a mixture of your own and Soobin’s cum leaking from your pussy. You raised your head slowly, your cheeks completely red as you looked into his eyes, still sitting on his cock. “Soob, this was the best sex I’ve ever had. God, you were so good.” He bit onto his bottom lip, watching your fucked out face. “Oh, yeah?” He asked, even more embarrassed than you were. “Does that mean you’ll let me fuck you again next time?” 

“Soob…” you mumbled, just watching him for a second before you carefully got off him. He just shook his head before you could say anything else. “I know, I know, don’t worry,” he muttered. “I still needed to try it,” he smiled awkwardly, his dimples being the cutest thing you had ever seen. “Let me help you clean yourself up before I leave. It's the least I can do,” He suggested. You nodded to him, convinced this was the last time you were together like this. You couldn't be more wrong though. 

You knew you couldn’t stay away from him for too long when he helped you to get into your bathroom and his fingers found their way to your clit again, making you melt at his touch. Even worse was when he carried you to your bed after he switched your bedsheet for you, asking you to let him eat you out one more time before he would leave you alone for good. 

You just couldn’t let him get away. 

“Fuck, Soob,” you mumbled, sitting on the edge of your bed, watching him kneeling in front of you, begging to feel your cum on his tongue again. “You’re going to be the death of me, aren’t you?” His innocent eyes looked up at you, his hands rubbing your thighs. You sighed, “Just stay here.” 

You could swear you saw sparks in his eyes as the words left your mouth. “Really? Can I?” 

You nodded, agreeing. “Sleep here tonight, I’ll let you eat me out again next time.” 

Soobin smiled proudly, his hands squeezing your thighs. “Only next time?” 

“God, just come here,” you proclaimed, pulling him up from the floor into a warm kiss, feeling his hands roaming on your body again. The night was still nowhere to be done.

[bell4donn4]

Getaway truck | a western road trip with Luke Castellan

Tags: established relationship,Luke and reader are basically the mom and dad of chb, reader’s godly parent is not specified.

Author’s note: tbh I’ve been lowkey obsessed w western Americana and road trips. I wanted this to be longer but whatever

The humid wind coming from the rolled down window gently messed up your hair.

You sat quietly on the passenger seat of the washed out green truck you and Luke rented. It must have been a Ford 1967, or some other kind of vintage model.

You couldn’t tell, and honestly, you didn’t bother to anyways, too busy looking out of the window admiring the desertic surroundings; sipping on your coca-cola.

<<you smudged your lipstick>> he glanced at you, taking his eyes off the road to send you a lopsided smile. One of his big and rough hands rested on your bare thigh, exposed by your jeans shorts.

It was mid summer, almost autumn time, yet the western country side never failed to drain you out with its scorching weather.

<<did I?>> you pulled down the visor, inspecting yourself in the small mirror; but you could tell he was right by the red stain on the metal can.

<<oh yeah, I did>>

Luke laughed lowly while he took a turn to the left, hand strong and firm on the steering wheel. You admired him in silence, a sort of pride filling your ego as you looked at your boyfriend.

That day, he wore a white linen shirt, which he (purposely) left unbuttoned on the chest, making his Hermes dog-tag visible. A pair of sunglass used to sit in the bridge of his nose, but were now long forgotten on the dashboard. It felt weird to see him without the bright orange shirt.

This little getaway from camp was going more than lovely. Finally free from all the responsibilities you both had to take on. You couldn’t even imagine how the camp must have looked like in that moment, with both of the two head counsolers gone.

<<do you think they set the cabins on fire?>>

<<for how long have we been away?>> Luke said

<< half a day?>> you nodded

<<yeah then, the woods are probably already burning as well. Along with the cabins and all>>

he hummed in approval at his own answer, earning a giggle from you.

He caressed your thigh with his thumb.

<<im joking, I’m sure the kids will be alright>>

<<you sound like an old dad>>

He shrugged his shoulders, grinning; but just as it started, the conversation slowly died down.

In the background of your comfortable silence, a low melody coming from the radio filled your ear.

With Luke, you didn’t need to talk. No many words need to be spoken with a man like him. You have been together enough to understand each other in silence. Plus— that should’ve been a sort of vacation from the chaos of camp.

So you preferred not to add anything else, simply allowing the worries to occupy the back of your mind.

You turned the music up as Molly Parton started playing.

You enjoyed the song, humming along the robotic notes coming from the radio.

Fortunately, by the time you arrived at your destination— a lake far far away from the one you had to see everyday— the worries were all gone. Replaced by that fuzzy feeling that only being with Luke could give you.

[atlabeth]

all of me | luke castellan

pairing: knight!luke castellan x princess!reader

a/n: sooooooo i know that i said i would work on something else but this hit me and suddenly i could not rest until i wrote something for it so you're getting headcanons since i can't formulate proper thoughts. some of this is dialogue but most of this is pure stream of consciousness. im already kind of obsessed w them ?

wc: 3.7k lollll this got away from me but it was so much fun.

warning(s): parental death, fighting, normal royal stuff. fluff, angst, all that good shit

princess!reader and knight!luke

yeah

and they're childhood friends bc they grew up in the castle together

YEAH

luke is the son of a kingsguard and he wants to be just like his mom 

his father is out of the picture (booo) and his mom never really talks about him but she’s raised luke the best she can

shoutout to may castellan, she was the first female kingsguard! and definitely the first to personally guard the king 

you are the heir to the throne and the only thing you're sure of is that you want luke to be in your life

you basically spent all your time together because he was kinda the only one your parents would approve you hanging out with

most of the crownsguard don't have children and those that do have them live with their spouse outside of the palace, and your parents didn't want you spending time with the children of servants

and luke's mom is your father's closest friend because she's the king's personal knight and so everything’s basically already vetted and they don’t have to worry about you accidentally getting murdered by him 

so you and luke basically spend every moment of your free time together!! 

even when you’re not free tbh 

sometimes you beg your tutor to hold your lessons outside so that you can sneak glimpses at the knights training and luke training alongside them 

whenever he sees you, his face always instantly brightens and he will lose focus in whatever tf he’s doing because he’s only thinking about you now 

and instead of either of you doing what you’re supposed to do, you just spend the whole time making faces at each other and trying to grab the other’s attention 

after his mother tries (and fails) to get him back on track a million times and your tutor realizes that you’re never going to listen to her historical prattles they allow the two of you to talk for “FIVE MINUTES AND NO LONGER MY BOY” and your tutor is all “i ask that you do not delay our lessons any further, your highness” 

and tbf you and luke could notttttt care less. you immediately join up and you start teasing him about his form and how he was holding his sword and he just makes fun of you for having to be a princess

“Your form is horrendous, Luke! How do you expect to beat anyone holding a sword like that?” 

“At least I’ll be on the battlefield one day. You can bore our enemies to sleep with your recounts of Aureldan history.” 

“Oh, I bet I could beat you right now. I’ve got royal blood in my veins.” 

“And I’ve got knight’s blood in mine,” he says. “I’ve at least got a sword. That’s more than you have.”

You huff. “Mother says I have to learn propriety before I even think about picking up a weapon.” 

“Do you want to hold mine?” he asks immediately, his eyes lighting up as he offers it over. “It’s just wood because Mom doesn’t want me to hurt myself, but that means it’s safe for you.” 

you do. obviously. 

You’ve got soft hands, untouched by the world, and the sword feels foreign in their grasp as you realize this is in fact the first time you’ve ever held a weapon. You cut it through the air a few times and Luke is grinning wider than ever 

“I think the role of a warrior princess suits you,” he says.

“It is nice,” you muse as you turn it over in your hands, already growing used to the feeling of it. 

“And you look great with it,” he says. “Powerful.” 

“I’d give myself a splinter before I can do anything with it,” you retort as you hand it back to him. “It’s a nice thought, though.” 

His eyes light up. “You should train with us sometime. My mom is the best at teaching— she’d teach you everything you need to know!”

You glance back at your tutor, who is very clearly eavesdropping, and you sigh as you look back at Luke. “Maybe in a few months.” 

Luke’s mother calls his name and it’s obvious that your time is over. You hug each other and promise to meet up as soon as your responsibilities for the day are over, then go back to your respective duties. 

Your tutor takes you inside because she doesn’t want anymore distractions, and you wave at each other like crazy as you’re walking back into the castle.

so yeah. you’re best friends and you have been since you first met as children, and though it is a battle for your betters to keep you on task if you’re near each other, you just light up when you see each other and it actually helps 

You’re learning dining etiquette and if you get told that you’re using the wrong spoon again, you’re going to lose your mind. 

luke is hurrying through the halls to catch up with his mother and you both catch a glimpse of each other. 

your posture straightens, he stops in his tracks, and you both smile at each other. then luke’s mother calls his name again and he’s on his way again. 

spoons aren’t that bad, you think 

you’re mulling over history books in the library that make you want to fall asleep.

luke just happens to be walking past on the way to his chores, and when he spots you, he yells out your name and waves at you. you wave back, and you both stifle laughs as your tutor shushes you 

suddenly, you’re not feeling so down.

Luke is training on his own out in the yard before dinner and he’s about ready to break his sword over his knee because he can not get this damned move right. 

he hears your voice across the way and sees you, all dressed up and with your parents about to get into a carriage. you’re on your way to a ball, he remembers you telling him earlier, and he finds himself smiling. 

You had been complaining about it, and Luke had told you to just think of the two of you hanging out whenever you were bored. You said you were already planning on it.

His smile widens. He’d be thinking of you too, wondering what it would be like for him to attend with you. Dressed in the same gaudy outfits as the rest of the court, having to go through the same dull niceties that you’d been raised on, listening to stories from other royals he couldn’t care less about. 

Standing beside you as an equal. 

Luke’s young, but he already doesn’t care for nobles and their court. But he thinks he would wear any amount of uncomfortable suits and listen to any number of dull proposals for you. 

for the rest of the night, he trains better than he thinks he ever has. 

and of course, you break the rules together. GOD HELP YOUR CHARGES YOU ALWAYS BREAK THE RULES TOGETHER 

your tutor cannot count how many times you’ve slipped out of lessons and she’s found you in the halls talking with luke, him smiling brighter than she’s ever seen as he listens to you go on and on and on 

your mother cannot count all the times you’ve talked about what you and luke did that day instead of describing to her any of the history or arithmetic you were supposed to be learning 

May always keeps watch over her son, but she’s been known to turn a blind eye when Luke thinks he’s being sneaky to go off and see you. 

and of course, sometimes you actually hang out when you’re allowed to hang out lol 

you’ve run around every bit of the palace grounds together, you ride horses together (with parental supervision of course), and once you’re a bit older, you’re actually allowed to practice with luke and the rest of the knights! 

typically, it’s a shorter session with May teaching the two of you, and typically, it ends with both of you ready to die because you’re just kids and even though Luke is a prodigy, you are sooooo bad at swordfighting. it’s honestly not even funny how bad you are at it the first couple of lessons 

But May just pats you on the shoulder and promises to work with you until you’re as good as her. 

(luke pouts and says he wants to be better than you. you forget that you’re holding a sword and just start complaining at each other) 

(“you CAN’T be better than me luke I’m the princess”) (“YES I CAN MY MOM’S THE GREATEST KNIGHT EVER”) (“SHE PROTECTS MY DAD WHICH MEANS I CAN BE THE BEST EVER”) (“THAT DOESN’T EVEN MAKE SENSE”) (“YES IT DOES”) (“NO IT DOESN’T”) (“I’M YOUR PRINCESS YES IT DOES”) 

(the lesson ends when May has to pry you two apart) 

but we haven’t gotten to the knight part. 

because it’s a bit sad. 

what happens to may in pjo canon is awful but 

May Castellan dies when you and Luke are sixteen. A month after your birthday, in fact. Four months after Luke’s. 

(he’s always held those three months over you, especially as you get older.) 

(it doesn’t seem to matter as much now.)  

rumor has it throughout the kingdom that she slowly went insane and then fully lost it, ultimately dying in an attack against the king during a ball that turned out to be a set-up. 

the only one who knows what really happened that night is your father as he was the only other person there at her death that still lives, but he refuses to talk about it, only saying that “Head of the Kingsguard May Castellan died a hero and shall be remembered as such”. 

Luke… does not take it well 

besides the king, he obviously spent the most time with his mother and it was obvious to anyone that she loved him with all her heart and wanted him to follow whatever dreams he may have had 

she’s given a knight’s funeral and you are beside Luke the entire time, holding his hand or him leaning against you as you listen to eulogies or even just sitting next to each other because your presence is enough for him. it doesn’t matter what—you’re always connected in some way, and no one says a single thing. 

he needs you, and you need him. it’s as simple as that. and no one dares to correct the princess when she’s icier than they’ve ever seen her.

You put on that front to protect Luke—you don’t want anyone bothering him, and you don’t want him to have to worry about you at a time like this. 

Because you know he would. He always does. 

When Luke gives his speech, barely able to hold back tears, he looks at you the entire time. he doesn’t tell you, but you’re the only reason he’s able to get through the day. 

Luke becomes a ward of the royal family. 

There’s no chance you’re letting him leave, and Luke doesn’t want to go either. The memories of his mother all around are painful, but he takes some small comfort that she’ll live on in Aurelda forever. 

Your parents have no objection to it—he grew up in the palace anyways, and he can practically provide for himself. You wouldn’t have let them say no. 

You’re thankful beyond words that Luke is still here. Because everything feels like a mess, and things are a little more manageable with him by your side. 

Someone tried to kill your father. They killed Luke’s mother instead. Both of you are broken in different ways.

Obviously, this sparks the beginnings of war both in Aurelda and in Luke’s entire being. 

but that’s a topic for another day. 

May’s death changes your relationship. 

She was his mother, obviously, but you were close to her as well. you could never forget every time she ruffled your hair and complimented your sword fighting, or every time she would acknowledge you in the midst of a crowd with a smile and a nod, or every time she would act like a mother and not a knight. 

she had the best hugs in the entire kingdom. 

But her death changes your relationship because Luke changes. 

He’s angrier. His edges have all sharpened, honed by his own spirit. He softens when he’s around you, but to the outside eye he’s impenetrable. He thinks you’re the only one that understands him. 

Others pity him, fear him, are jealous of him. 

You treat him the way you always have. Like your best friend. 

That’s all he needs. 

And so Luke throws himself into his training, vowing to become the youngest kingsguard in Aureldan history to honor his mother’s memory. He wasn’t able to save his mother, and he needs to become strong enough to protect the ones he loves from anything. 

(You don’t know it, but he thinks of you every time he closes his eyes and sees the night his mother died. He’s in the place of his mother and you’re in your father’s position, and Luke knows that he would sacrifice himself for you every single time.) 

So you don’t have as much time for each other anymore. Luke is on his kingsguard mission, and you’re starting to come into your own as the Crown Princess of Aurelda. 

You can’t sneak out of lessons anymore to go talk with Luke, because you’re starting to learn about the nuances of politics. 

Luke can’t let you interrupt his training, because he’s on a warpath and he won’t be stopped before he reaches his goal. 

You can’t neglect your responsibilities because they’re more than just etiquette or history lessons. War is going to come to Aurelda sooner or later, and you’ve got to be ready when it does.

You’re only sixteen, but neither of you are children anymore.  

But you’re still best friends. Nothing can change that—it’s just changed the way you show it. 

You take your morning walks with your mother past the training grounds, and Luke always smiles at you and salutes no matter what. You bow your head in a very refined, princess-y nod, and you continue on. 

Luke makes sure he’s always the one that gets to deliver news to you, even going so far as to make deals with other servants and messengers just to make sure he gets to see you at least once a day. 

Most of the time, you end up seeing each other at night. Just happening to end up in the kitchens at the same time for a midnight snack that results in hours of talking with each other. Bringing Luke to your balcony to look at the stars together. 

Even some midnight training has occurred together, though you always end up a sweaty mess and having to make a bath for yourself because you can’t alert your servants. Luke says he likes you best when you have that vicious glint in your eye while you’re training with him. 

Luke still has horrific dreams, and though he weathered them on his own for a while, one night he finds himself outside your door. When you open it, seeing his haunted eyes and disheveled appearance, you let him in immediately.

It’s not the first time you’ve slept in the same bed after nightmares, and you know it won’t be the last. 

(You spent the whole week together after his mother’s death. Not even your parents could complain when they saw the change in both of you.)  

And Luke does it. He completes his training, having become one of the fiercest and youngest warriors Aurelda has ever seen. Traditionally, knights are older, but an exception was made for Luke—he’s got the Castellan name and a childhood spent with the greatest knights in the kingdom to back him up.

You’re the first person he tells when he finds out, and your scream of pure joy must have echoed throughout the entire castle. You hug him tighter than he’s ever been hugged before, and for just a moment, in your embrace, he feels like you’re both kids again. 

Weeks from his eighteenth birthday, your father knights Luke Castellan in an official ceremony. 

Not just as a member of the kingsguard, though—he is sworn in as a knight, and as your personal bodyguard. 

Your father didn’t tell you beforehand, and you thank a childhood of courtly influence to keep the shock off your face. One hand tightens ever so slightly into a fist, and you let it out just as quickly. 

You can’t see Luke’s expression, kneeling and head turned downward. You would pay all the gold in the kingdom to know what he was thinking. 

“Sir Luke Castellan.” Your father’s voice booms through the hall, and a shiver even goes down your spine. “Do you swear to serve Aurelda as her loyal knight, through war and peace, through riches and debt?”

“I do,” Luke says. 

“Do you swear to protect the Crown Princess of Aurelda—” your father says your entire title, and for the fifth time you wonder how many middle names a princess needs, “—my daughter—with everything you have in you, until your dying breath?” 

Your breathing stills for the slightest moment. 

Luke doesn’t flinch. “I do.” 

The thought of Luke dying for you is unimaginable. It’s something you’d never ask of him—you don’t think you could live in a world without him anyways. You know it’s what knights are expected to do—for king and country, my life for yours—but that’s for any member of the royal family—any member of the court. 

Luke is assigned solely to your protection. 

And he doesn’t even falter when he bonds his life to yours. 

As soon as the ceremony is over and Aurelda has gained three new knights, you’re on your way to Luke. You don’t care if anyone else wants to talk with the princess, you don’t care if your parents need to tell you something—royal propriety be damned, you need to talk to Luke.

He doesn’t look surprised when you march up to him, but there’s already a different air about him. 

Maybe it’s because in these past couple of years he’s absolutely shot up in height, maybe it’s because his insane training regimen has toned every part of him, maybe it’s because he’s done what no one else has done before, or maybe it’s just because he actually accomplished his goal. 

But when he smiles at you, that crooked slant to his lips that always meant mischief when you were younger, it’s enough to make that train of thought immediately shut down. 

“Princess,” he greets. “I think we’re going to be spending a lot more time together, these days.” 

“Yeah,” you say, the warpath you’d intended to be on fading away almost immediately with his words (and that goddamned smile that will certainly be the death of you someday.) “Maybe this is our way to make up on all that lost time.” 

“...I’d like that,” Luke says. 

“Can I hug you?” you ask wryly. “Or is that unbecoming of a brand new knight?” 

“I don’t think anyone will tell the princess she is doing something wrong,” Luke says. 

So you do. You hug him, and he immediately wraps his arms around you, and you hate that you had any doubt that he would. You’ve always felt safe in his embrace even since you were children, and now that he’s four times as strong and much taller, you feel it more than ever. 

He truly does look the part of a perfect knight. You remember the days of wooden sword fights and afternoons by the lake, wondering what your future awaited, but sure you would be together no matter what. 

You feel like you’ve aged a century since then.

“I’m proud of you, you know,” you say as you pull away. “You’re incredible. I mean— you always have been, but this… It’s everything you’ve ever wanted. So I’m proud of you.” 

Luke brushes his curls out of his face with a gauntleted hand, his smile turning a bit more genuine. “It means the world, princess. You are… one of the main reasons that I even made it up here. So I have you to thank.” 

You feel your cheeks heat. “I haven’t done anything.” 

“You’ve been you,” he refutes. “You’ve stood by my side through everything, and you’ve always been there when I need you no matter what. You’ve done everything.” 

You’re thankful for the sheer sleeves of your gown, because now your entire body feels warm. And maybe that’s why you practically blurt the question out, but it’s been burning in your mind since the moment it happened. 

“Did you know?” 

He frowns. “Know what?” 

“That you would become my personal guard,” you said. “You’ve wanted to be a part of the kingsguard since you were a child, and now…” 

“Princess,” Luke says, “I asked your father for the honor.” 

That throws you off. “What?”

“Do you think he would entrust your wellbeing to just anyone?” he asks. “It’s part of the reason I’ve been training so hard—I wanted to prove to him that I was worthy of the position.” 

“Luke—” you start, but he shakes his head.  

“War is coming to Aurelda whether we like it or not,” he says. “All I want is for you to be safe. This way, I can ensure it.” 

“You said you would die for me,” you say. “You vowed it.” 

“That is generally how knighthood works, yes—” 

“Luke,” you interrupt forcefully. “I don’t want you to die for me.” 

“The goal is for nobody to die,” he says wryly. 

You cross your arms. “You know what I mean.” 

“Your safety is my number one concern, princess,” he says. “That’s all you need to know.” 

You stare at him. He stares back. 

You win, because Luke sighs and shakes his head. “We don’t have to worry about that at the moment. Right now, you have to get back to change before you sit in on an advisor’s meeting with the king and queen.” 

You frown. “How do you know?” 

“I’m your guard,” Luke says. “It’s my job to know.” 

“You were just sworn in!” you protest. 

“And I am always prepared,” he remarks. Luke holds his hand out in a gesture towards the door. “After you, princess.” 

You shake your head as you start walking. You hear Luke’s footsteps start soon after, much heavier than yours in full armor as opposed to your ceremonial dress. “You are ridiculous.” 

“Which is also my job,” Luke muses.

and so luke becomes a knight, but not just any knight.

your knight.

good luck handling that crush on him you've harbored since childhood now.

[lovecla]

IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME KNOW | jack hughes.

chapter ten:

<last chapter> <epilogue>

➴ warnings: none :)

➴ word count: 1k

➴ author’s note: and finally, the last chapter of IYLM,LMK. this one’s a bit shorter but i wrote a longer epilogue for you guys :) i’ve been writing stories since i was ten years old but this is the first time i finish the entire thing and actually like it. don’t know how to thank each and every one of you for reading what i write and for appreciating it as much as i do. but thank you.

liked by jackhughes, tyla, nicohischier and 3,798,012 others

sophiamontenegro make me yours is officially, well, yours now!!!!

every time i release something i feel extremely lucky and grateful, no matter what. today, i'm more than happy to share this part of me with you all. we've been working on this album for a whole year now and it's insane how much things can change in such a short amount of time.

i've learned a lot about myself during this whole process and it's crazy yet so rewarding. this album is a message to everyone i love and to young sophia, specially.

hope u enjoy!!!!! 💙

View all 13,086 comments

morgan.grace Soph, i can’t tell you how PROUD i am. I’ve known you for almost six years now, and i pray every. Single. Day. That we have the rest of our lives together. I love you so much! Happy horny album day! 💙

sophiamontenegro morgan.grace i love u

user1 I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

user12 Jack can u fight lol

ellievlasic woaaaaaaah

njdevils sophia MONTENEGRO 💜

_quinnhughes Congrats Soph!

sophiamontenegro _quinnhughes thanks quinny!

lhughes_06 _quinnhughes sophiamontenegro Y’all coming for dinner tonight ?

_quinnhughes lhughes_06 You could’ve just texted

sophiamontenegro _quinnhughes jack and i are coming!!!

user5 sophiamontenegro yeah i bet u are

user3 I’m so in love with this album, horny sophia is my favorite sophia

user11 thats that me espresso indeed

jackhughes I wonder who inspired you to write these songs

user67 jackhughes crazy shit to say tbh

— ♡

IN the beginning of January, you started writing your sixth album. Well, you started writing it officially, with the help of your songwriters and producers, because truthfully, you’d been writing it since you and Jack started seeing each other— just some random lines here and there in your Notes app on your phone, that quickly turned into songs.

Months passed and life got extremely busy. People seemed to be very interested in your relationship with Jack, in a weird, almost comical way. Several social media managers have already contacted your team to ask for your participation in YouTube videos, interviews and TikToks, but you refused most of them.

You didn’t mind about talking about Jack or spending time with him in studios, but you knew it wasn’t his cup of tea— even if he never said anything— so you just tried to separate your love life from your career.

The New Jersey Devils failed to make the Stanley Cup Playoffs, and Jack was really upset about it, just like Luke, Nico and the rest of the team, because despite what happened back in November, they all worked really hard.

Time passed after that, and it was summer again, one year since you and Jack started seeing each other. Sometimes, sitting on the bench at his and Quinn’s summer house, you ask yourself if things weren’t moving too fast. In less than a year, your life changed in ways you never even imagined before and you didn’t know if it was scary or not.

But whenever you thought of Jack, you remembered his thick, beautiful lashes, blond hair decorating his arms and legs, blue eyes that brought the ocean to you, smile that brightened the world.

You remembered how he took care of you, how he’d listen to your songs and recommend them to people, how he’d go to your concerts whenever he had the chance, and how he was often seen wearing your merch around town whenever the two of you weren’t together. How he’d watch you perform and congratulate you every time. How he’d spontaneously post pictures of you on his Instagram account, and how he’d reply to some of your fans' comments.

You had been right all along; Jack is your forever. He’s it for you.

You feel the sweet, cold breeze hit your face and you smile, watching as Jack, Quinn and Luke played with each other inside the lake, while Hischier talked with Ellen and Jim.

“Can you believe this is our life?” You asked, quietly.

“Actually, yeah, I can,” Grace replied beside you, laughing. “The only crazy thing about this is us falling in love with hockey players. Didn’t see that coming.”

“Right,” you nodded. “I can't imagine myself with anyone else though. That’s bad,” you joked.

“I don't know if it is that bad,” she shrugged. “Jack loves you a lot. That man can’t stop staring at you even when you’re ten feet away from him.”

You laughed, turning your head back in Jack’s direction, finding those blue eyes you loved so much immediately, who was now running towards you, with his body drenched.

“No, Jack, stay away!” You yelled, getting up quickly and running away from him.

“Soph!”

You started laughing, which made you lose your pace, making it easier for Jack to wrap his wet, cold arms around your body, wetting your white dress.

“Jack, stop, you’re making me wet!”

“That’s what she said,” he whispered in your ear, picking you up and making you wrap your legs around his waist. “Hi, Soph.” He smiled.

You gave in and kissed his lips, smiling softly as he kissed you back.

“Hi, Jack Hughes.”

He put you down and turned you around, wrapping his hands around your waist and resting his chin on your head. “I think this is the happiest I’ve ever been.”

That surprised you, and you felt yourself smiling even wider. “Not when you joined the Devils? Not when I won a VMA? Not when I gave you a blowjob just this morning—”

“Okay, okay,” he laughed, kissing your cheek. “Those are all super happy moments but right now, here with you, baby… I’ll never be this happy again.”

A few years later, you’d look back at that moment and think, oh, Jack, baby, that’s just the beginning. Because he would say the same thing years later, when he kissed you at the altar, or when he held your daughter for the first time.

“I get what you mean,” you snuggled closer, ignoring the wet clothes. “I’ve been happy before. I am happy. But this… this is different.”

“Yeah,” he whispered. “So different.”

“Will I ruin the moment if I say I need to go pee?” You bit your lip.

Jack laughed out loud and picked you up again. “I love you, Sophia Montenegro.”

“I love you more, Jack Hughes,”

“Well,” he kissed your cheek. “I think that’s up for debate.”

“Well. Maybe.”

— ♡

liked by sophiamontenegro, morgan.grace, ellievlasic and 219,983 others

jackhughes lucky fella. sophiamontenegro

View all 1,990 comments

morgan.grace saurrrr cuteeeee I love you guys

user83 ADOPT ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

user86 imma start doing cocaine…

user1 i wanted to hate on them so bad but they lowkey fire asf :/

user7 soph when u hug him, remember you’re hugging my whole world…

nicohischier ❤️

user8 Ain’t no way he can handle all of that

trevorzegras user8 he can’t.

jackhughes trevorzegras fuck off

[simplybakugou]

omg I saw you post about wanting dad!Bakugo ideas and tbh I have so many but I don't wanna be greedy or overwhelming so here's one <3 Dad!Bakugo when you get caught sneaking out. He assumes the worst- thinking you were out drinking, partying, something like that (y/n would be like.. 14-16 or somethin, yknow?) But in reality you were just sneaking out to go to the 24/7 ramen place down the street with your secret partner who you haven't told your dad about bc they're the same gender as you <3 It's a lot, I completely understand if ya aren't interested in writing it <33 I just think it would be a really cute and emotional but also amusing and heartfelt idea that I would love to read but can't find the motivation to write </3 Love your work!!!!

⋆ PAIRING: dad!bakugou x fem!reader ⋆ WARNINGS/TAGS: swearing; teeniest tiniest bit of angst; fluff; talks of being closeted ⋆ WORD COUNT: 3492

A/N: not me writing two works in 2024 back to back?! crazy omg. also i decided to make y/n bakugou’s s/o and not his child as that’s what i’m most comfortable writing about. hope that’s okay! also please feel free to send as many dad!bakugou ideas you want cause i’ve been wanting to write as many as i can. sorry if the ending is awkward i had some trouble finishing it :( tysm for requesting and i hope you enjoy :)

© simplybakugou — all rights reserved. DO NOT REPOST/REUPLOAD, TRANSLATE, OR EDIT ANY OF MY CONTENT ON HERE OR ANY PLATFORM

“Fuck,” Bakugou cursed to himself, setting the knife down and grabbing a paper towel to tend to the small cut he had just accidentally put onto his index finger. Your home was filled with a savory aroma as Bakugou’s cooked dinner as he did every night.

“Are you alright, Katsuki?” You asked from the dining room, averting your eyes from your laptop and peering into the kitchen to check on your husband. 

“I’m fine. It’s just a small cut,” Bakugou called out, grabbing and applying a band-aid from the cabinet and onto his finger. Afterwards he went back to the task at hand. “Where’s Suki?” 

“She’s upstairs, I think she’s showering. Apparently they were working on training their quirks in U.A. and she said she felt disgusting,” you responded, reverting your attention back to the work you had left on your laptop. 

“So they’re already training their quirks? I need to train with her more then.” Bakugou turned the stove off as he moved tonight’s dinner to a singular dish. He went over to the dining table where you were seated to set the table.

You furrowed your brows at him. “Katsuki, she trains enough at U.A., not to mention you train with her after she comes back from school too. You’ll overwork her if you do even more than that.”

“She needs the training. She has to get stronger if she wants to get better.” Bakugou spoke to you while walking back and forth from the kitchen to the dining table as he placed all of his dishes down for his family to share. “She’s gonna get her provisional license soon and I don’t want her to fail like I fucking did.”

“I understand, but you’re being too hard on yourself and on her,” you said, shaking your head at your husband who has a tendency to overwork himself. 

“If she’s gonna be the best, she has to be better than me. And I’m gonna make sure she’s a hundred times better than I ever was in U.A.,” Bakugou stated adamantly as he sat himself across from you.

You sighed, closing your laptop and setting it aside so you could eat. “You’re impossible, you know that?” 

Bakugou smirked as he was about to let out a snarky comment until Suki walked downstairs, a towel in hand as she was still drying her ash blonde. 

You smiled at the sight of your daughter. “Suki! You’re just in time for dinner.”

Suki stopped as she took in her parents at the dining table and the giant spread of food Bakugou had prepared. “Oh, I thought I told you guys I wasn’t that hungry today…”

Bakugou whipped his head around to look at his daughter. “No you fucking didn’t.”

“Whoops,” Suki said, laughing cautiously as she rubbed the nape of her neck with her hand. “I’m kinda tired from all the training today so I think I’m just going to head to bed.”

You frowned. “Are you sure? Maybe eat just a little, sweetie.”

Suki shook her head. “It’s okay, Mom. I’ll be fine.” She turned to her father. “And I’m sorry, Dad. I know you worked hard to make all of this.”

Bakugou sighed. “It’s fine. Pay me back with training right after you get back from school tomorrow.”

Suki winced but nodded reluctantly for her father’s sake. “Alright.” She turned around and made her way upstairs as she called out, “I’m going to bed. Good night!”

“Good night, sweetie!” You called back out to her. You averted your attention to the delicious spread in front of you, once again thankful for having a husband who could cook so well and alleviate you from the burden of having to do so. 

“That shitty kid needs to eat more,” Bakugou grumbled, shoving his homemade meal into his mouth in the process. “She’s not gonna get stronger if she doesn’t eat well.”

“I agree with you there. At least with the eating more part.” You took a sip of water. “I hope she’s doing okay. You don’t think she’s overwhelmed at school and she’s just not telling us, right?”

“She’s fine, you’re worrying too fucking much, Y/N.” He glanced back at the stairs before eating again despite his statement. He didn’t want to say it aloud as he knew you would start freaking out but he was also concerned. Bakugou always wanted what’s best for his daughter who was inspired by her pro hero father to become a pro hero herself. When Suki expressed her interest in becoming a pro, Bakugou had to physically hold himself back in a way to not overwhelm her with how excited he was with the news. And you could see it yourself. You saw the way Bakugou perked up and seemed more enthusiastic, in his own way of course, every time Suki asked for training advice or told Bakugou about her day at school. You loved and admired their bond and how much closer they were getting the more she developed her quirk and skills. 

You leaned back, patting your full stomach. “That was delicious, Katsu.” You stood up with your empty plate in one hand and patted his head with your other. Bakugou glared at you as he stood and cleared the table. 

You went over to the sink to wash the dishes, intent on putting your share of the housework as Bakugou cooked only to be lightly pushed out of the way as Bakugou began to wash the dishes. 

“Katsuki!” You exclaimed. “You always do this. I’m supposed to be the one who cleans up when you cook.”

You attempted to push him back but unsurprisingly he didn’t budge as he ignored you and continued to clean. “Oh, shut it. Just go finish your paperwork over there.”

“Fine,” you huffed as you sat back down at the dining table. Instead of finishing your paperwork you sat begrudgingly in your seat with your laptop in your lap as you waited for Bakugou so the two of you could go to bed together. 

Thankfully with Bakugou being Bakugou, he was finished in no time and the two of you went upstairs to get some sleep. 

As you were situating yourself in bed, Bakugou stood in front of Suki’s room. He knocked on her door and the absence of a response prompted Bakugou to open the door slowly. He poked his head in and saw Suki fast asleep with her lights still on. He smiled softly at the sight of his sleeping daughter and even though he knew he was tough on her, he knew she was working hard to prove to him how she will become an incredible hero.

“Katsuki, are you coming?” You called from your room.

“Yeah, yeah,” Bakugou responded as he turned Suki’s light off and closed her door. 

The alarm blaring from her phone jolted Suki awake. She quickly turned it off, hoping it didn’t wake her parents in the same manner as it did her. The time on her phone read 3:30 AM as Suki slipped out of bed. She quickly changed out of her pajamas and into sweatpants and a sweater and tiptoed out of her room. 

Suki glanced over at yours and Bakugou’s bedroom door, thankful as it was closed shut. Sometimes Bakugou would sleep with the door cracked open slightly as he was convinced he would be able to hear anybody sneaking in if anyone attempted to rob your home or attack his family. You would call him crazy and usually waited for him to fall asleep before closing the door all the way in which Suki was ecstatic that you did so that day as well. 

Suki made her way down to the front door and took her keys and her jacket and left her home. She grabbed her bicycle that was propped on the side of the house and began making her way down the road. She shivered as the cold winter air hit her face as she rode her bike, her eyes watering as they searched for one particular person.

Suki smiled once she spotted who she was meeting at 3:30 AM on a school night.

“Took you long enough!” Yui, Suki’s girlfriend, called out from her respective bike. 

Suki grinned at her girlfriend and stopped her bike beside her. “Are you sure this place is open 24/7?”

Yui nodded. “They just opened up. Did your old man catch you?”

Suki shook her head. “I even skipped dinner and I’m starving now.”

Suki knew she wasn’t supposed to be out so late but she couldn’t help it; she missed her girlfriend. In addition, during the day she was busy at U.A. and afterwards she would train with her father. In the evening she’d have to keep up with her studies and her homework, making it almost impossible to spend time with her partner. Not to mention, Suki still hadn’t come out to you or Bakugou.

It wasn’t that she didn’t trust either of you but there was a small, miniscule feeling Suki had in the back of her mind that made her fear your reactions to having a girlfriend. Thankfully, unlike Yui’s parents, you and Bakugou never mentioned or questioned if Suki had a boyfriend, but she knew Bakugou especially would disapprove of anything that would divert her attention from her training and studies.

“Come on, let’s go!” Yui exclaimed and the two girls continued down the road to the ramen shop.

Bakugou woke up feeling immobilized. In an attempt to go to the bathroom, Bakugou tried to get up but couldn’t do so as you were literally holding him down in your sleep. Your arm was wrapped around his torso, your leg over his thighs, and your cheek was pressed against his chest. In moments like these he blamed you for making him feel sore in the morning. 

“Y/N,” Bakugou said softly as he quite literally peeled you off of his body. He was successful and he laughed once he heard you groaning in your sleep as you turned the other way.

Bakugou went to the bathroom and just as he was on his way back to his room to fall back asleep right beside you, he noticed Suki’s door was ever so slightly left open. He knew she always criticized him for leaving his door open so he knew something was up immediately.

Bakugou went over to Suki’s door, knocking once again just as he did before going to sleep earlier and again there was no response. He pushed the door open, furrowing his brows at the sight of what was supposed to be Suki’s body under her covers but Bakugou was too clever to fall for something so simple. He walked closer to her bed and pulled back the covers, not surprised to see two pillows that were formed to imitate her body.

“She fucking snuck out,” Bakugou muttered angrily to himself. He threw the blanket back onto the bed and went back to his bedroom where you were sleeping. He shook you awake. “Y/N, wake up.”

You woke up frighteningly, sitting upright. “What? What’s wrong?” You asked confused and tired. 

“Suki’s not here.”

“What?!” You exclaimed, immediately jumping out of bed and running to Suki’s room to check. You turned back to Bakugou. “Do you think she was abducted? Or kidnapped? Oh no, do you think one of those villains you fought came back for revenge?! Our poor baby–”

“Y/N, calm down,” Bakugou said, placing his hands on your shoulders. “She’s not kidnapped. That little shit snuck out.”

“What? There’s no way Suki would sneak out, Katsuki.”

“She put her pillows under the covers to make it look like she was sleeping.”

“But… why would she do that?” You questioned. This was completely unlike Suki, which made you ponder even more about her motive. Usually if she wanted to go anywhere or do anything, she would ask you or Bakugou for permission in which, most of the time, you both would say yes. 

“Who fucking knows. She’s probably out drinking or partying. She’s fifteen for fucks sake.”

“I don’t know, Katsu, I don’t think she’s the type to do something like that. The only possibility that makes sense is…” You thought about it some more until it finally hit you. “Maybe she’s seeing a boy!”

“A what?” 

“Come on, it’s the only thing that makes sense. I don’t think she’s the type to go out drinking.”

“I’d rather her go to a party than be alone with a boy this fucking late.” Bakugou clenched his fists at the thought. “I’m gonna go find her.”

“Wait!” Bakugou ignored you as he continued downstairs, grabbing his coat and throwing his shoes on. “Don’t go out and use your quirk.”

“Why the fuck not? It’s the fastest way to get to her.”

You sighed hopelessly at your husband. “It’s 4 AM, Katsu, your explosions will wake up the whole neighborhood. Just take the car.”

“I hate that fucking piece of shit,” Bakugou grumbled. “Fine.”

“And take this, too.” You tossed his phone that you had quickly grabbed, which he caught with ease. “Call me when you find her.”

Bakugou felt himself getting more and more impatient as he drove in circles around his neighborhood. He knew Suki couldn’t have gone far as he noticed her bike was missing. He checked her friends’ houses that he was aware of for any signs of partying and checked every convenience store nearby as he knew Suki loved them. Bakugou cursed at his daughter internally as she had also turned off her location on her phone. The last place left to check was the new ramen shop that had just opened and you had begged Bakugou to try out with you once he had some time off from work.

Bakugou recognized Suki’s bike parked right in front along with another bike right next to hers. To his knowledge you were right; Suki was here to meet a boy.

Bakugou felt himself getting angrier. How could Suki sneak out for a stupid boy? Doesn’t she know training has to be her top priority? Boys are a distraction and wouldn’t do her any good. He felt justified in these thoughts as he didn’t start dating until after he graduated which was when he met you.

Nevertheless, Bakugou parked and exited the car. He was planning on busting the door down to the restaurant, scold Suki, and murder whatever stupid boy had stolen his only daughter’s heart.

And Bakugou fully planned to do so until he stopped in his tracks at the sight he caught through the window. Suki was laughing, leaning on the person next to her. It was a girl. Initially Bakugou assumed it was a new friend that Suki had made until this new “friend” kissed his daughter on the cheek.

At that moment Bakugou understood fully what was going on. He was still upset that Suki felt like she had to sneak around to spend time with her girlfriend and he still thought having a partner could be a distraction but Bakugou knew he shouldn’t be physically upset as he initially intended to. 

So Bakugou waited, his arms across his chest as he leaned against his car and waited for Suki to come out from the restaurant.

When she was getting up to leave with her girlfriend by her side, Suki couldn’t remember the last time she enjoyed herself as much as she did in that ramen shop. She felt so comfortable in her skin and wished she could spend time with Yui more so that she didn’t have to sneak out like she did that night.

“I had a lot of fun today,” Yui said as the girls thanked the shop owners and made their way to the exit.

“Me too. Maybe next time we can go on a date during the day and not 5 AM,” Suki joked and Yui agreed.

“Mhm. But do you feel comfortable telling your parents?”

Suki sighed. “I want to tell them soon. It’s just so scary.”

“I get it, believe me.” Yui pushed the door open and they both walked towards their bikes. “Text me whenever you’re free again.”

Suki nodded and gave her girlfriend a small peck. “Come on, I’ll drop you off.”

“Suki, I live literally right next door. If anything I should be dropping you off,” Yui said with a laugh. “Are you okay getting home?”

Suki nodded confidently. “Absolutely. I’m in U.A. for a reason, you know.”

The girls continued and finished their goodbyes and Suki watched Yui take her bike on a very short ride to her house. She waved to Yui once more before turning around to head back home in the opposite direction. And that was when she finally saw him.

There Bakugou was, still leaned against his car down the road with stern crimson eyes watching his daughter. Suki’s eyes widened at the sight and immediately wanted the ground to swallow her whole. “Dad?!”

“About damn time you noticed me,” Bakugou grumbled, loud enough for Suki to hear as she cautiously walked towards Bakugou.

“What’re you doing here? How’d you find me?” Suki’s bike fell on its side as she loosened her grip out of shock.

“I just wanted to check on you when I woke up and saw you weren’t in bed. Do you know how fucking terrifying that is?” Bakugou asked angrily. Suki winced at her father’s tone, looking down and away from the intensity of his gaze. 

Bakugou sighed, calming himself down. After seeing how happy Suki and her girlfriend were together, he felt his initial anger diminish. “Why didn’t you just tell Mom and me you wanted to hang out with your girlfriend?” 

Suki felt overwhelmed with mixed emotions. She felt exposed but also guilty for not being open with her parents. “I-I don’t know. It was hard keeping this from you.”

Bakugou watched Suki closely and briefly. He could see her body shaking in what he assumed to be fear. He had caught her in an intimate moment with her significant other, someone that she felt that she had to hide from her parents. And it broke Bakugou’s heart thinking about how difficult it must have been carrying a secret so big and integral to who she was as a person.

Bakugou took a few steps forward, closing the gap between him and his daughter and he embraced her. Suki, whose eyes were still fixated on the ground, was taken aback at this sudden act. Her father, one who rarely showed any physical affection, was hugging her so tightly. “I can’t imagine what it must’ve been like having to keep this secret.”

Suki’s vision blurred as tears began to well in her eyes. She buried her face in Bakugou’s chest and she returned the embrace. “I’m so sorry. I should’ve told you guys,” Suki blurted out in between her sobs.

Bakugou patted her ash blonde hair down with his hand, still holding her as tight as he possibly could. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m sorry for making you feel like you can’t be open with me. I know I can be shitty and tough on you but I’ve always wanted what’s best for you.”

Suki sniffled as she pulled away, rubbing her eyes and ridding her cheeks from the tears that had stained them. “It’s not that I felt like I couldn’t open up to you or Mom. I knew deep down that you guys would accept me regardless if I were gay or straight but I kept psyching myself out.”

Bakugou smiled softly, patting her back. “Suki, there’s nothing on this fucking Earth you could ever do to make me or your mother disappointed in you. Even if you decided to not be a hero anymore, I wouldn’t give a shit. All I want is for you to put your all into whatever it is you do and not to half ass anything.”

Suki smiled sheepishly. “Thanks, Dad.” Bakugou knelt down and grabbed Suki’s bike, wheeling it over to his car as he put it in the trunk. 

“So am I off the hook for sneaking out?” Suki asked, hoping to hear the answer she wanted to hear as she walked over to the passenger side of the vehicle.

“Fuck no. You’re still in trouble,” Bakugou stated simply in which Suki sighed, not surprised at the answer. “Now you don’t have to sneak out to see your girlfriend, at least.” The two entered the car and Bakugou turned the vehicle on as he turned it around to head back home. 

“Can I invite Yui over for dinner sometime?” Suki asked, looking at her father expectantly.

“Yeah. You gotta explain to your Mom what happened. She’s at home thinking you got kidnapped.” The two laughed as they made their way back home to you.

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[slut4thebroken]

Exposure Therapy pt. 11

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Jonathan Crane x reader

Summary | Jon is so down bad it’s a little embarrassing tbh. Like this whole chapter is full of simp behavior but we love it.

Warnings | Ushy gushy nasty ass fluffy smut, kissing, hickeys, cunnilingus, unprotected sex, breeding, Jon is so fucking soft bro, mentions of rape and kidnapping, nightmares, comfort, idk what else tbh.

Words | 5.7k

Notes | Okay first of all, I’m so sorry it took so long 😭 Second, don’t come for me if his backstory is wrong. The internet says like a million different things so I just used my best judgment for what was right lol. Also I’m running out of gifs 😞

Ao3 link | <3

Fic Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Part 10

“Where are we going?” You asked as he led you through the dark streets, keeping a hand on the small of your back. He had you pack up everything in the duffel bag before leaving, not giving you any indication of where he was taking you. 

“Quit asking, we’re almost there.” You rolled your eyes at that, but stayed silent. He had you enter what looked like an old, almost abandoned apartment building, then took you up two flights of stairs before going down the hall and stopping in front of a door. He reached in his pocket and grabbed a key, then opened it. 

“Jon… What is this?” You don’t remember him mentioning anything about this. When you walked in, you examined the space in shock. 

“It's yours— ours. I bought it for us… Kind of.” 

“Kind of?” You asked, looking at him again. 

“I threatened the landlord.” You scoffed a laugh and could feel your stomach flutter when he gave you a small smile. 

“It came fully furnished?” You walked over to the bed and plopped down on it, closing your eyes and groaning at the feeling of a proper mattress. 

“Most of the furniture, yes. But he was more than willing to include a mattress and some complimentary sheets and towels after our conversation.” You heard his footsteps growing closer but you kept your eyes shut, savoring the feeling. “Do you like it?” You finally opened your eyes and turned your head to look at him with a smile. 

“I love it.” Suddenly hit with an idea, you leaned up on your elbows, then continued. “You know… You’ve never fucked me on an actual bed before.” You said with a small smirk. 

“In that case, we’re going to be very busy.” He crawled over you and you fell onto your back again, wrapping your arms around his shoulders once his face was level with yours. “Because I’ve never fucked you on a kitchen table, a counter, or in the shower either.” Your cheeks heated up at the implication, despite the fact that you just made a similar remark. 

“I guess we better get to it then.” You said, voice already embarrassingly breathless. He leaned down to kiss you, starting out slow and soft but quickly growing more rough and passionate. He kissed his way down your body, removing your clothes to expose more skin. Once he was at your hips, he laid down between your legs before continuing. He kissed from one thigh to the other, never going where you wanted him to. When you let out a needy whine and grabbed his hair, he laughed under his breath, but gave it to you anyway. He started with a light kiss on your clit, then licked a long stripe up your folds. You let out a shaky breath, trying your best to be patient, but failing anyway. 

“Jon, please.” You whined, lightly tugging on his hair. 

“Shh, be patient, little one.” He said softly. You whined again, but it cut off into a moan when leaned down to suck you clit into his mouth. 

“Fuck— please..” You whimpered, pulling harder on his hair and letting your eyes flutter closed. A moan caught in your throat when he suddenly pushed a finger inside, immediately curling it against your walls, making your back arch as you pushed your hips down onto the stimulation. His movements were slow, but deliberate, carefully manipulating your body to bring you closer to the edge.

“Feel good?” He mumbled against you. You let out an embarrassing mewl as you nodded. 

“Yes..” You said through a breath. “Jon.. need you.” You whined, making him pull up from your clit. 

“You’re not ready yet,”

“I am— please.” You’re not. But you need him inside you already. His finger slowed to a stop and you watched him with furrowed brows, waiting. 

“Can you wait just a little longer for me?” He asked softly, in that voice that makes you instantly melt and want to do whatever he says. You nodded with a pout and the corners of his lips turned up at your obedience. “Good girl.” He pushed another finger inside as he leaned back down to keep sucking and licking your clit. 

You grabbed his free hand, intertwining your fingers before resting it on the bed, and as he looked up at you, you swore you felt him smile against you. When a third finger entered you, your grip tightened on his hand and you let out a quiet whimper. He focused more on stretching his fingers inside you now and even though it didn’t feel as good, you just had to remind yourself that it was getting you closer to him finally fucking you. 

“Please.” You whined, gasping when he lightly bit your clit. You understood the warning though— be patient. ‘Just a little longer’ was turning out to be longer than you expected and you could feel your orgasm rapidly approaching. “Jon— Jon, wait..” You whimpered, pushing at his head now, rather than pulling him closer. 

“Fuck— please, I want to come on your cock.” You whined. That made him finally pull back as he cursed under his breath. He wiped his face with the back of his hand and nodded, chest heaving as he panted. 

He removed his clothes quickly and you waited eagerly, trying not to complain about how long it was taking even though it only took him barely a minute to fully undress. He crawled over you and brushed your hair out of your face before cupping your cheek. 

“Say, please.” He said teasingly. 

“Jon,” You whined, long and bratty. When he stayed silent, you huffed, then said, “please fuck me.” 

“Good girl. Though I’m not sure I’m completely convinced.” You let out a low growl and used strength you didn’t know you had to roll both of you over so you were on top. He raised his brows, seemingly amused by your eagerness, and you ignored him as you lined yourself up with his cock. The smug expression left instantly when you sunk down, only stopping once your ass met his thighs. 

“Say, please.” You smirked, watching his face contort with pleasure. 

“Cute.” He said through a breath and you relaxed your legs so you were completely sitting on his lap, making both of you moan when you took him even deeper. You looked at him expectantly, watching as he rolled his eyes. When he reached for your hips, you grabbed his wrists and pinned them to the bed. 

“C’mon, Jon. Say it.” Despite the fact that he huffed and rolled his eyes again, you could feel his cock twitch inside you. You didn’t want to push your luck though by telling him you knew he was enjoying the slight role reversal, so you just waited for his response. Eventually he let out a heavy breath, staring up at you. 

“Please.” He muttered, making you grin. 

“Good boy. Though I’m not sure I’m completely convinced.”

“Please.” He repeated, firmer this time, but still with attitude. Instead of responding, you started rocking your hips. His fists clenched where they were pinned to the bed and he tilted his head back as his eyes fell shut. 

“Don’t be a tease.” He said, when you didn’t speed up. 

“Why not? I like how you look like this.”

“Everything you do now, I’ll do ten times worse to you later.” He warned, making you smirk. 

“I’m sure you will, Jon.” You didn’t give him a chance to reply before switching it up, starting to move up and down now, still maintaining the agonizingly slow pace. You let go of his wrists and placed your hands on his torso to stabilize yourself and help take some of the strain off your legs. His hands settled on your hips, but he barely grabbed you, just lightly rested them there. 

After only a few minutes, your legs were starting to shake and you slowed to a stop as you caught your breath. 

“Jon..” You whined with a pout. 

“Yes, little one?” He asked coyly, making you frown. 

“Please…”

“Please what?”

“Take over already! My legs are giving out.” You laughed weakly, trying to play it off as a joke. 

“Thought you said you like how I look like this?” 

“I do, but— not the whole time.” You whined. 

“You wanted to be on top, I’m giving you what you wanted.” He shrugged, thumbs rubbing circles on your hips. 

“Well now I want you to be on top!” If you weren’t so desperate, you would’ve been embarrassed by how whiny your voice sounded.  “Jon, please, ‘m sorry.” You whimpered. He cooed mockingly and brought a hand up to cup your cheek. 

“I know. And to think, if you would've been patient and not a greedy brat, you’d have what you want right now.” 

“Please! I said I’m sorry, what more do you want?” 

“Well I wouldn’t mind it if you’d start moving again.” He smirked, making your frown deepen. 

“Please, I’m sorry. I’ve learned my lesson, Jon. I won’t do it again, I promise.” When he remained silent, waiting, you whined loudly. “That’s not fair!”

“Now you’re gonna throw a tantrum?” He chuckled, making your cheeks flush with anger and embarrassment. 

“Please, Jonny.” You whimpered as tears filled your eyes. He stared at you for a moment, then closed his eyes with a heavy sigh, his grip tightening on your hips. 

“Jesus— fuck… You’re so fucking spoiled.” He swiftly turned you both over and you let out a startled moan when he immediately started rocking his hips, not going too fast yet. “I get you an apartment, an actual bed— and you can’t do the work for once?” Despite the fact that he was teasing, you still bit your lip and furrowed your brows, feeling bad. 

“‘m sorry, Jonny.” You said meekly, averting your gaze. 

“I know, little one. It’s okay.” He cupped your cheek and gently kissed your forehead, making your whole face heat up. “I know you can’t help it.” His thrusts sped up a little, rutting into you with more purpose now. “You get a cock in that pretty little cunt and you just get all dumb and come hungry.” You whined and turned your head away, embarrassed. With the side of your neck now bared to him, he leaned down, kissing and sucking the sensitive skin, being sure to leave marks. You were panting and moaning, pulling his hair as the pleasure consumed you. When he snaked a hand down to rub at your clit, you mewled and tugged on the strands even harder. 

“Fuck— Jon… please make me come.” You whimpered, hips grinding up into his hand. He trailed kisses up your neck to your jaw, then to your lips. You moaned into the kiss, clinging to him as he swallowed your sounds of desperation. “Please…” You whined against his lips, making him pull back just enough to look at you. 

“So fucking spoiled.” He muttered, rubbing your clit faster and fucking you harder. “Ready?” He asked softly and you nodded with a whimper. “Go ahead, baby.” Almost as if on command— but also because of the still unfamiliar pet name— your orgasm finally crashed over you. His movements never faltered, letting you ride it out, and your whole body shook as you clung to him. 

“Good girl.” He murmured, burying his face in the crook of your neck to trail kisses along the sensitive skin, making even more sounds leave you. Your walls tensed around his length, quickly growing overstimulated, but before it started hurting, he was letting out a choked moan and cursing under his breath. His hips stuttered before he finally pushed all the way inside, occasionally rutting into you. The stifled sounds that escaped him were sparking a new fire in your belly, but he was done after only a few seconds, much to your disappointment. 

He let out a heavy breath and lifted his head to finally look at you with a small smile. Your heart fluttered at the light blush dusting his cheeks and the way that he looked at you. You quickly grew nervous under his gaze and glanced to the side. 

“What?” You asked shyly and he shook his head, eyes moving all over your face. 

“Nothing. I’m just…” He cut himself off, then his expression became more serious and you stared up at him, trying not to let your anxiety consume you. “I like being here with you.” Your eyes widened and your whole face heated up. Biting your lip, your gaze shifted between his eyes as you tried to come up with a response. But you could see that if you stayed silent any longer, he’d get closed off or distant. 

“I like being here with you too.” You decided to say. 

Your heavy eyes fluttered open, trying to adjust to the overhead light— even though the bulb was pretty dim— but the haziness left instantly when you heard a soft noise from beside you. Jon was still asleep, brows furrowed and lips in a frown, and he was writhing a little, muttering something you couldn’t understand. Placing a hand on his arm, you gently shook him as you called his name, but he didn’t wake up. So you shook a little harder and spoke a little louder. 

He suddenly bolted up with a gasp and was panting as he frantically looked around the room. When you put your hand back on his arm, he quickly took it in a bruising grip and yanked it off of him, making you whimper in pain. 

“Jon— Jon, it’s me.” You said through a wince, trying to remove yourself from his grip. He suddenly snapped out of it and his hand went lax, allowing you to pull your arm away. He looked confused almost. Confused, but definitely scared. “Are you okay?” You asked softly as you rubbed the sore skin. 

“I’m fine.” He spat, trying to control his breathing as he looked anywhere other than you. You knew he wouldn’t want to talk about it so you didn’t bother asking. 

“Do you want me to stay here with you? Or do you just want some space right now.” He almost seemed caught off guard by the question and he took a moment to respond. 

“Stay.” He said it so quietly that if you weren’t waiting for his response, you probably wouldn't have heard it. 

“Okay. Would you still like to lay together or would you rather I not touch you yet?” 

“No- lay with me. Please.” 

“I can do that.” You gave him a small smile that wasn’t returned as you laid back down, hugging his chest and letting him snake his arms around your torso. Once you were settled, he grabbed your hand and lifted it to examine the red mark on your arm. 

“I'm sorry for hurting you.” He said quietly, pressing a soft kiss to the sore skin. 

“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have touched you when I didn’t know how you’d react.” You placed a soft kiss on his chest in return. “Do you want to talk about something to get your mind off it?”

“You’re not curious?” He sounded tired. 

“I am. But my curiosity is not more important than your comfort.” 

“Oh… Thank you.” He muttered, bringing your hand back down but intertwining his fingers with yours. 

“When’s the last time you laid with someone after having a bad dream?” You had a sneaking suspicion that his answer would give you all the explanation you need for why he acted this way. 

“Never.” Even as a child? You wanted to ask. But deep down you already knew the answer. Even without a psych degree it wasn’t too hard to deduce that most of his issues more than likely stemmed from his childhood. 

You tried to think of a response. Pity would just make him upset so an apology was out of the questuon. Should you joke about it to lighten the mood? Probably not the best idea… Ignore it and change the subject? You didn’t want to give him the impression that you don’t care though. 

“As long as you’ll let me, I’ll always be here when you wake up.” You decided to say. “If you want me to be.” 

“Why?” He croaked, tone full of an unusual amount of emotion. 

“Because I— I… care.. about you. And I have a feeling you’d do the same for me.” You shrugged, trying to sound nonchalant and not like you almost just confessed again. 

“I would do the same.” He confirmed, making the corners of your lips turn up. You wanted to tease him- call him a softie, maybe make a joke about how it’s obvious that he cares about you despite the warning he gave you, but you didn’t want to ruin the moment by saying something that would embarrass him. 

“It’s settled then. Next time either of us has a nightmare, the other will be there.” He let out a soft, breathy laugh in response and started rubbing light circles on your hand with his thumb. 

“Do you have nightmares?” You tried not to noticeably stiffen at the question. 

“No.” You shrugged, swallowing the lump in your throat. 

“Are you lying?” You could tell by his tone that he was genuinely asking. 

“I haven’t had one in a while so not really.” Technically that’s the truth. But you left out the part about how you frequently had nightmares over the past few weeks. 

“Since when?” 

“Jon, it doesn’t really matter, okay?” He stayed silent and you fought the urge to look up at him. 

“In Arkham?” He asked quietly. 

“What?”

“You had them in Arkham?” He clarified and you grew nervous. 

“And before.” That is also technically not a lie… You did have the occasional nightmare or two. When he remained silent again, your stomach churned. He’s probably going to start his whole “you have stockholm syndrome and don’t actually like me” rant again and you really don’t want to listen to that a second time.  

“I haven’t had one since we left. Honestly, it’s fine.” 

“About what?” 

“Jon,” 

“About what?” He said, more stern this time. 

“I’m not going to play into this and let you torture yourself.” You finally leaned up to look at him, finding his brows furrowed and lips curled into a frown. 

“You don’t need to. You not telling me is a pretty clear answer.” He wouldn’t meet your eyes and when he swallowed, your gaze shifted to the movement of his throat before going back up to his face. 

“Jon, please don’t do this again. Can’t we just… lay here together— and be happy?” He finally looked at you with an expression that was a mixture of disbelief, pity, and disapproval. “Please.” He looked away from you again and you watched his cheek tense as he clenched his jaw. When he started to slowly shake his head, you placed your free hand on his cheek, trying to stop him. 

“I don’t care about any of that! Why can’t you do the same?” You said, exacerbated. 

“You should!” His voice was much louder now, almost startling you, but you held your ground. 

“Well I don’t! I care about the fact that you’ll lay with me after I have a nightmare and that you call me stupid names you hate just because I like it.” He kept shaking his head so you continued. “I care about the fact that you wouldn’t let anyone hurt me, that you value my comfort enough to go out of your way to get this place.” You paused, taking in a deep breath, trying to ignore how scared you were for how this conversation would end. 

“And I care about the fact that you care about me. Nothing else matters to me, Jon.” You said softly. 

“I gave you nightmares for weeks— I hurt you. I…” He let out a shaky breath, clenching his jaw to suppress the emotion that was starting to show. “I don’t know w— I just… I wanted you to myself.” He all but whimpered, making you frown. You mulled his words over in your head, trying to think of the best way to approach this. 

“What if you do something to make up for it?” Honestly you didn’t think this would work, but you also had a feeling that he’d think being vulnerable with you could help push him in the right direction. 

“How could I possibly make up for raping and kidnapping you?” He scoffed, frown deepening. 

“You already have. But if it’s not enough, then why don’t you tell me about yourself?” You said, purposefully ignoring his word choice. 

“What?” He asked through a breath. 

“Tell me about your childhood, what made you decide on this career, your family, friends.” You shrugged, just trying to give him ideas. Honestly you didn’t need to know any of this. Sure, you’re curious, but you’re fine without knowing. This was just the best thing you could come up with because you genuinely didn’t need him to do anything, but you knew he wouldn’t let it go. 

“That will… make up for it?” He seemed equal parts solicitous and apprehensive. 

“You don’t have to, it was just a thought.” 

“That’s what you want?” He was still unsure and you started to feel bad for guilting him into this. 

“No, I just— I’m sorry I didn’t mean to pressure you like that. As I said, you don’t have to make up for anything, Jon. I mean it.” You could tell he didn’t believe you though. He didn’t speak as he examined your face, searching for anything to back up his suspicion that you were lying and you really did care. Eventually he just looked away from you with a small frown, thinking. 

You didn’t know what else to do to convince him or make him get over it. Sure he did those things to you, but you know your feelings are real because you had them when he was just your therapist. They weren’t as strong as they are now, back then it was just a little crush on the handsome doctor. You admired his intelligence and thought he was effortlessly funny, even though it didn’t seem like he realized it. 

“My father was a doctor.” He said quietly, making your focus snap back to him. 

“What?” It took you a moment to realize why he would’ve randomly said that. 

“He was a doctor and he primarily studied fear.” Already your stomach was twisting at the thought of where this was going. “He didn’t have any test subjects though… So he used me.” He shrugged slightly and your lips parted in shock. Even though you expected this, you still hoped you’d be wrong. 

“A few years later when I was a teenager,” His father did that to him when he was just a child? The thought made your chest ache even more. “I realized that if I could control fear, it would never be able to control me again.” The final piece to the puzzle that was Jonathan Crane. 

“The rest of my family wasn’t much better and I didn’t have any friends. Was there anything else I missed?” You blinked in shock, still trying to process all of this while simultaneously trying to come up with a response that wasn’t pity. 

“Honestly I wasn’t expecting your response to give me an actual explanation for why you are the way that you are, but it did. To a tee.” 

“You’re satisfied then?” 

“Well I’m a little sad to be honest but other than that yeah.” His brows furrowed in confusion and it truly baffled you how someone with a psych degree couldn’t understand your feelings. “Not that it wasn’t before, but all is forgiven now. Plus you’d be surprised how many good people only do bad things because of emotional and physical neglect and abuse so how can I even really fault you for any of that?” You shrugged. 

“Since when are you the psychologist?” He asked teasingly, his frown slowly lifting into a small smile. 

“I’ve watched enough Criminal Minds to know that.” 

“Criminal Minds?” 

“You haven’t watched that show?” You asked in disbelief. 

“I don’t watch tv.” He said simply and you gaped at him for a few seconds. 

“That might be the saddest thing you’ve said so far.” You feigned seriousness, but couldn’t hold in your laugh when his smile grew. 

“We can watch it if you’d like.”

“God no— There are like 15 seasons and plus, I don’t even know if you’d like it.” 

“15? Why do they need so many?” 

“I don’t know, it’s a popular show.” You shrugged. “Also I don’t know if you’ve noticed… but we don’t exactly have something to watch tv on.” 

“I’m aware. I’d buy you something.” 

“Or you could use your charm and get them to ‘donate’ it.” 

“I don’t think I’m a very good influence on you, little girl.” He said teasingly, but your cheeks heated up from his words. 

“What can I say? I want a tv. I haven’t watched anything in weeks.” 

“Is there anything else I can get you, princess?” Your eyes widened at the new name as you choked on your spit, making his smile turn into a smirk. Even though he was mocking you, the name still made arousal pool in your stomach. 

“Um… I- I don’t… No?” You replied, unsure. 

“There’s nothing else you want?” You bit your lip and shook your head, the fire in your face not calming down. 

“What about a book?”

“A vibrator?” You said at the same time as him, making his brows shoot up before he let out a loud laugh. 

“A vibrator? Do I not satisfy you, little one?” 

“N-no! You do! I just- it was stupid… sorry.” You mumbled, turning your face away from him. 

“Hm?” He gently guided your head back to face him and you let out an embarrassed whine, not wanting to continue. 

“It’s just different.” You muttered, flushing down to your chest now.  

“I see… Well, I don’t know how I could say no to that, especially when I’m so excited to watch you use it.” You choked on a gasp as your eyes widened. “When we get up I’ll give you some paper. Write a list of anything and everything you want. I’m sure the landlord will be more than happy to help us out.” 

“Are you crazy?! I’m not having the landlord buy a fucking vibrator.” You scoffed in disbelief, trying to mask your embarrassment. 

“Fine.”

“Fine?” 

He didn’t respond. Instead you just laid and talked a while longer, had a quickie, then got up to be at least a little productive. He had you write down the rest of the list to give to the landlord, then a few hours after the sun had set, he was taking you somewhere. 

“Are you sure we should be out in the open like this?” You asked, checking over your shoulder again. 

“No one should see us. Even if they do, they wouldn’t bother calling the cops.”

“But what about the vigilante?” 

“If he shows up, then you run. Do you understand?”

“I’m not just going to leave you.” You scoffed making him stop and turn fully toward you. 

“I will not tell you again. If he shows up, you run.” He said sternly, making you cross your arms over your chest. You could only maintain eye contact for a few seconds before huffing and looking away. “Do you understand?”

“Yes.” You muttered, rolling your eyes. 

“Good girl. Now hurry up, we’re almost there.” You only walked another two blocks before he was leading you in a store, making your eyes widen as you took in the contents. 

“What,”

“You said you wanted a vibrator.”

“I- I know, but— this is a sex shop.” You said weakly, the statement sounding more like a question. 

“Did you have somewhere else in mind to buy it?” He teased, making your blush intensify. Once he realized you wouldn’t be able to respond, he placed a hand on the small your back and guided you to the vibrator section. You stood there, staring at the various toys and blushing all the way down to your chest. 

“Which one would you prefer?” He turned to you but you kept your eyes forward, too nervous to face him. You knew which one you wanted… but you were too embarrassed to tell him. “Think about it. I’m going to grab a basket.” 

“A basket?” You asked as you turned to him, eyes widening even more, but he was already walking back toward the entrance. You stared at the various types and sizes, but your eyes kept drifting to a wand that was really similar to one you used to have. 

“Have you decided?” You jumped at his voice, not having heard him approach. 

“Um… That one I guess?” You said, pointing to it. He grabbed it and put it in the basket. 

“Any other ones?” You shook your head, biting your lip and trying not to get too overwhelmed from the embarrassment. 

“Okay. What else would you like?” You hummed in thought and walked around the store with him trailing behind you. Once you saw the lube, you paused in front of it and looked at him questioningly. “You want to try that again? It probably won’t feel as good as it did before.” 

“I still want to. If you do.” Instead of responding, he reached for the bottle and placed it in the basket, then you were moving on. 

The collars caught your attention, but you tried to act nonchalant as you made your way toward them. You eyed them longingly, but passed them by, too embarrassed— even after already adding lube and a vibrator to the basket. 

“Wait.” He suddenly said, making you stop and internally applaud yourself. 

“What?” You asked once you were facing him. 

“I want a collar.” He glanced at the shelf before looking at you again. 

“Aw, Jon, you want to wear a collar?” You smirked and he stared at you with a deadpan expression. 

“Cute. But let’s not pretend like your cunt isn’t aching at the thought of me leading you around by a leash.” Your smirk slowly dropped, but he wasn’t done teasing you yet. “I think we should get a name tag for it too, don’t you?” Your eyes widened at his words, suddenly feeling shy again. 

“Shut up.” You muttered, looking away from him with a blush. You examined the different collars, trying to pick one. “Can I get more than one?” 

“I’ll buy the entire store if that’s what you want.” Your blush intensified and you were completely caught off guard by the admission. 

Unable to respond, you just reached for a plain, black o-ring collar and tossed it in the cart, along with the matching leash. Next, you decided on the daintier, light pink choker. This one was lace and silk and had a small bow in the center. 

Walking around the store, you grabbed a few more things; metal handcuffs, a butt plug, candles and a lighter, and nipple clamps. When you got to the impact play section, you faltered. You weren’t lying when you told him you like being spanked. But when you look at a paddle, all you can think about is what followed after the last time he used one with you. 

“We can get one, but we don’t have to use it until you’re ready.” He said softly. You silently grabbed a paddle and placed it in the basket, only hesitating for a brief moment. 

“Can we look at the clothes?” You asked, changing the subject. He agreed and you walked across the store then looked through the different racks. “You were a professor right?”

“Yes.” You pulled out the tiny white, button down crop top and the even tinier, plaid skirt to hold against your body. 

“I’m not doing well in your class, professor. Is there something I can do to help my grade? I’ll do anything.” You said in an exaggerated seductive tone. He rolled his eyes but you could see the faint blush on his cheeks. “You’re totally into that aren’t you?” 

“It’s tolerable.” So he is… Good to know. 

It almost felt like you had an inside joke with him now and you smiled at the thought as you placed the outfit into the basket. You continued searching through the racks of clothes, almost giving up, but one item caught your attention. It was a pink babydoll dress with lace cups and a silk skirt. Fucking adorable. And it matched the choker too. You placed it in the basket and were about to walk away when he stopped you. 

“Wait. That one too.” He pointed to a red, lace bodysuit, so you chuckled and found your size before adding it to the almost overflowing basket. 

The walk home was uneventful. Jon wouldn’t let you carry any of the bags even though all of it was your stuff. The second you were inside the apartment and he locked the door, you threw yourself into his arms and kissed him. He grunted in surprise before reciprocating. When you pulled back, he tried to move forward, not wanting the kiss to be over yet. 

“Thank you.” 

“There’s no need to thank me. It was as much a gift for you as it was for me.” 

“Yeah, but still. I appreciate it. My ex never wanted anything to do with any kind of sex toy so it’s refreshing to be with a secure man.” You gave him a small smile, but stiffened once you realized what you said. “Not that I’m with you— I mean I’m technically with you physically right now, but” He kissed you softly, cutting off your rambling. 

“You are mine— no one else’s. Which means you’re with me.”  

“I don’t know… You haven’t even asked me out yet. Saying I'm with you seems like a bit of a stretch, don’t you think?” 

“Oh so now you care about labels?” 

“Maybe.” You shrugged. 

“Fine. Go out with me, little one. Be mine and mine alone.” He pleaded, making your heart flutter. “Let me be yours.” You bit your lip to hide the love sick grin that was growing. When you nodded eagerly, he almost returned the expression. 

Part 12

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[ludicdoll]

hello! been obsessed with your work! (I think I already read all archie madekwe x reader fics from you tbh). Been sobbing over Lizzy McAlpine's song Vortex. And I couldn't stop imagining Farleigh x reader who is in an on and off again relationship. Reader tries to stop herself from going back every time he's at her doorstep begging. But always fails. And it's just sad. LMAO

𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐑

farleigh start ☆

pairing: farleigh start x fem!reader

contents: angst, mentions of sex, slut calling, farleigh being a little bitch, reader is also an american, smoking, suggestive at the end but no smut, kinda toxic

synopsis: although your relationship with farleigh is complicated, you can’t help but run back to him every time he needs you.

a/n: this is so late im sorry i’ve been so busy and this has been sitting in my drafts for a while😭

there’s something so alluring about farleigh that makes you chase him constantly—even if he pays no attention to you. you long for his approval, his touch, and in his absence you realize you can’t seem to function correctly without him. your relationship with farleigh is complex, to say the least, and everybody around you knows this. whenever you would tell felix that you and farleigh had split up again, he always replied with “give it a week.” and somehow, he’s always right. but, this one was different. you split up with farleigh a few weeks ago and he hasn’t even tried to make an attempt to contact you. he knew you’d come back around sooner or later, but you were persistent on keeping your ground.

your breakup with farleigh was because he had called you a slut, just straight up—which was quite ironic because he was the known campus whore. usually you would ignore his silly and childish name calling, but you hated him calling you a slut, it was too degrading for you. you remember the way farleigh blew up in your face when you told him the two of you were over, it was a priceless expression. now, you’re currently standing outside of the saltburn estate, leaning up against one of the large extravagant stone pillars. felix was hosting a party tonight, a big one at that. the colorful flashing lights can be seen outside, a neon cast over the large grassy field.

you decide to step out for a smoke and some fresh air after you locked eyes with farleigh as he was dancing with a girl, her hips grinding against his. that image alone made you shiver in disgust. although you had broken up with him, you missed him bad. you tried to deny it, but if you had to be honest with yourself—you didn’t know who you were without farleigh. if only he would give you a genuine apology, everything would be fine but his pride stopped him from doing so.

you turn your head when you hear the grand doors behind you creaking open. you watch as felix stumbles out, his dark brown hair disheveled from the party. you’re surprised to see him since he had vanished halfway through the party with some random girl you presume. felix turns, a surprised expression on his face. you look over at him, smiling weakly as you raise your cigarette to your lips.

he stands by the door for a minute, stretching his neck before walking over to you. “what are you doing out here?” he asks. felix scans your appearance, eyes widening when he spots a bottle of vodka in your hands, the same bottle that mysteriously disappeared a few hours ago. you shrug slightly, tired and feeling nauseous from the amount of drinks you’ve had tonight. “you missing the states?” felix nudges at your arm playfully. you stare ahead, shaking your head. “i just needed to clear my mind,” you mutter as you lift the bottle to your mouth, taking a long gulp. felix notices that you’re out of it, and he looks concerned. “you haven’t been yourself.” he starts, “ever since farleigh—” you raise your hand out, your palm facing him. “don’t. mention. him.” you groan, rubbing your temples to soothe your migraine.

“he misses you,” felix smiles widely. you stare at the red cups littered on the paved ground, slowly zoning out. “we’re not talking.” you reply, he sighs in return. “well, he wouldn’t stop talking about you in professor anderson’s class.” you turn to look at him, raising a suspicious brow. you think he’s joking at first, but his face is completely straight.

“really? i didn’t know the two of you even attended classes.” you joke in an attempt to move the topic elsewhere. “oh, ha ha.” felix replies sarcastically. there’s so many things racing through your mind, but at the same time—your thoughts are empty. you think that the alcohol from tonight has made you more sensitive. “i don’t like it when you guys fight.” felix mutters as he slowly takes your bottle away from your grip. “you should stop drinking too,” he waves the half empty bottle in front of your face.

“it’s not a fight, felix. it’s a breakup.” felix scoffs, shaking his head with a laugh. you turn to look at him, a scowl on your face. “oh, so you think i’m gonna run back to him?” you ask in a bitter tone. he steps back a little, blinking at your unexpected tone switch. “what? i didn’t say anything.” he says defensively. you suddenly feel irritated at everything around you. you excuse yourself abruptly while he tries to explain himself. you speed past him, leaving felix by himself outside while you open the doors to the mansion.

ੈ✩‧₊˚

you can’t stop fidgeting with your pen, clicking it rapidly as you scan the words in the open book in front of you. you were sitting in the library, not for the sake of studying but for the sole purpose of distracting yourself from having a mental breakdown in your dorm. you couldn’t even think straight since your hangover was so bad. you hadn’t tried to dress up today, you didn’t even bother to put on makeup or fix up your hair. you knew people would see you and talk, but you were so tired you couldn’t do it. usually when you and farleigh would split, you’d still be in close contact with your (who were really just his) friends. however, this was different. everyone seemed to be avoiding you—everyone except felix. whenever you’d ask to hang out, their only excuses were “i have to study,” or, “i’m busy tonight,” and when they see you, they’d scurry off in a blink of an eye.

you could only imagine what bullshit story farleigh has came up with your break up to make them run away from you. felix was the only person who still spoke to you, but now you think you’ve lost him after what had happened at the party last night. you stop clicking your pen when you hear a cough in front of you. you look up, freezing up when you see a familiar curly haired boy in front of you. “fancy seeing you here.” he says. you scoff, rolling your eyes and avoiding his gaze. he laughs quietly to himself before crossing his arms. “i didn’t know you studied.” he emphasizes the word “studied” almost like he was attempting to mock you—but he knew you did study, he just wanted to make fun of you. “i didn’t know you even knew what a library was.” you snap back instantly, farleigh just smiles blankly at you as he pulls a chair out and seats himself right across from you.

“what do you want?” you ask sternly. he sighs, shrugging. a tense silence fills the air and you’re slowly suffocating. “i’m serious, farleigh.” he stays quiet, his eyes still on you. “what did you tell the others?” you inquire.

“hmm?”

“no one’s talking to me anymore.”

“that’s not true,” he laughs, “felix was just talking to you last night.” you squint at him, brows furrowed. “were you watching us?” you ask. farleigh tilts his head to the side, flashing a deadpan expression. “please, i have better things to do.” he replies arrogantly. you nod, closing your eyes. “i’m sure you do.” you look back down to read the words on the page, not taking in any of the information—but just so farleigh would piss off. you could still see him in your peripheral vision, but this time he’s leaned closer against the table. “get a life, farleigh.” you mumble under your breath. he laughs dully, a small smirk forming on his lips. “that is rich coming from you. you really like assuming shit, don’t you?”

“well maybe if you took my name out of your mouth, i wouldn’t be assuming.” you reply nonchalantly as you close the book, standing up to leave. you pack your stuff back in your bag, turning away from him. he mouths a quiet “wow” before getting up from the chair as well, following closely behind you. he swiftly steps in front of you, blocking you from leaving. he leans closer to you, just inches away from your face. “you think you’re all that,” he starts. “but in reality, you’re just a fucking whore with no personality.” you quietly wince at his response, eyes wide. “you’re lucky that i even gave you a fucking chance. i made you known, and this is how you repay me?” farleigh spits out, he sounds truly angry—you’ve never heard him like this before. “but it’s fine,” he says while leaning back up, “such a shame, you’re a pretty face. too bad you’re boring.”

you can’t muster up a snappy comeback, you just stare at him, scanning his face for any sign of empathy—but there’s nothing. he just looks distant and cold. you glance around, realizing there was a few students nearby listening. you sniffle under him, blinking away your tears as you quickly brush past his arm.

ੈ✩‧₊˚

it hurts to pretend like you don’t care about what other people said about you, because in actuality you take all of their words into consideration—especially farleigh’s. you had successfully avoided farleigh all week ever since the conversation in the library, and in an attempt to make yourself feel better, you had finally started dressing and glamming up. of course, there was still rumors going around about you and farleigh, every day it seemed like there was a new bizzare one. you had just came back from shopping, sitting on the carpet of your dorm. it was getting dark, everyone else in the hall was getting ready for bed. as you slowly dive into a wormhole of your own thoughts, the sound of an abrupt knock on your door brings you back to reality. you blink, turning your head to look at the door.

you choose to ignore it, pretending like you weren’t there. then, another string of knocks pound on your door loudly. “oh my god, i’m coming!” you yell out as you get up from the floor. you pad over, opening it with an unenthusiastic swing. the person standing infront of you was the last person you expected—farleigh. you almost screamed when you saw him standing there. you groan loudly and roll your eyes, immediately reaching to shut the door on him. before you could lock him out, farleigh stops the door with his hand. “can we talk?” he mutters with his head low, almost as if he was afraid someone was going to hear him. you stand still in the crack of the door, contemplating whether or not you were gonna let him in. farleigh whines, shaking his head slightly.

“please?”

you sigh in defeat, slowly creaking the door open for him. he gives you a small smile before sliding through. he looks around your room for a second, taking in every aspect of your interests plastered on the walls. farleigh sits down on the edge of your bed, realizing he’s never actually seen your dorm before. whenever the two of you would fuck, it was always in his dorm, a random bathroom at the pub, or somewhere at the saltburn mansion. he runs his hand against the soft duvet of your bed, laughing to himself when he spots a pile of stuffed animals by your pillows. you shut the door, turning to face him with your hands on your hips. you stare at him, raising your brows as a way of saying “go on,” farleigh clears his throat, clasping his hands together in his lap. “i’m sorry.” he sounds hesitant when he says it, like he’s being forced to apologize.

you blink, staying silent as he stares up at you with bambi eyes. “and?” you press. farleigh sighs, dropping his eyes to the floor instead. “i was just upset, i didn’t mean anything i said. i love you, you know that.” he says with a whiny tone. you’ve been through this same scenario multiple times, he fucks you over, comes back to apologize and beg for you back, then you have make up sex. every time this happens, you forgive him easily, letting him fuck your brains out to forget everything he had said to you prior. you didn’t want to give in again, but the way he was looking up at you with his dreamy brown eyes, his highlighted curls framing his face perfectly, even his cologne was driving you crazy.

you missed him, you missed his voice, his explicit compliments, especially his touch. “i miss you, baby.” he whimpers. you cock your head to the side, trying to hide your excitement. “really?” you ask with dilated eyes as you slowly step over to him. farleigh nods, a small smirk forming on his lips. “please, baby—please don’t make me sit here and beg.” he groans. he looks at you up and down before reaching for your hand. he intertwines his fingers into yours, a perfect fit. farleigh nuzzles his cheek against the soft flesh of your skin, then he kisses your knuckles, a predator like glint flashing in his eyes. he pulls you onto the bed with him, placing you in his lap as he leaves a trail of delicate kisses down your neck.

“let me make it up to you.” he whispers. you moan softly, looking up at him. you lean your head against his shoulder as his hands roam up your back, then under your shirt. “forgive me, okay?” he mutters in your ear. you feel his hands stopping midway to your bra, and you whine softly in response. you lock eyes with him, nodding eagerly. he gives you a faint smile before he continues to unclasp your bra with a swift move. you knew that he’d fuck up again soon, and you knew you would run back to him again—but if it meant incredible sex, you didn’t mind.

© please do not publish my work on other sites.

[diorsluv]

feather , part 16

“ floating through the memories ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by jamie.drysdale, jackhughes, adamfantilli, and 76,954 others

yourusername a lil photo dump from this month :)

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jamie.drysdale that pic of me on fort makes me look homeless

→ yourusername i mean u were the one that stole my guest room

_alexturcotte yoooo it’s a cat

→ yourusername yes booker has 2 🥰🥰

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username36 the guys r trying so hard to be nice LMFAO

username23 okay but tbh the way he looks at her… 🥹🥹🥹

lhughes_06 damn i didn’t make it in the dump

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trevorzegras i thought we all collectively decided to forget about that pic of me and turcs

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→ _quinnhughes so did we all forget what the definition of “collectively” is or???

→ jackhughes yes quinn we’ve all collectively forgotten

username1 our mini drysdale seems a lot happier and i’m here for it!!!

liked by yourusername

rutgermcgroarty i don’t think it’s safe to be taking pictures of yourself in the side mirrors while driving

→ yourusername i was parked. at the beach. you were there.

→ rutgermcgroarty see i’ve collectively decided to omit that from my memory so no i wasn’t there actually 😒

→ _quinnhughes that’s.. still not what collectively means rutger

edwards.73 will i ever make the photo dump 😕

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→ _quinnhughes you’re all using collectively wrong just to spite me aren’t you

yourusername

liked by bookerburke_, adamfantilli, _alexturcotte, and 41,002 others

yourusername when he takes you to paint in a field of flowers 🥹🥹

tagged: bookerburke_

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bookerburke_ hope i’m living up to the expectations 😅

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→ bookerburke_ yea but i doubt it lmao

→ yourusername i don’t think we should be doing this in my public comments

→ jamie.drysdale uh?? she’s only dated two other guys and they were a lot less of assholes than you

this comment thread has been deleted

username57 um… we all saw that thread right

→ username11 yes but let’s not talk about it

username63 yo those comments were so uncalled for??? what happened to the “good guy” or was it all just an act??

username44 wtf? the switch-up is crazy and bro CANNOT be talkin to lil drizz like that

username18 don’t tell me he started acting like a dick just cuz she started giving more attention to luke again

adamfantilli the stuffed animals yay

edwards.73 ooh painting 👀

trevorzegras the cowboy hats… are you turning texan

lhughes_06 nice hat

rutgermcgroarty show the finished painting don’t be scared!

colecaufield man where’s all the replies from our lil drizzy 🥲

_quinnhughes kid if this is your attempt at being aesthetic then you’re failing pretty bad

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next chapter notes ) first off i wanted to say THANK YOU FOR 200 FOLLOWERSSS!! i’m glad at least some of yall enjoy this series lmfaooo and I KNOW I KNOW it was kind of a really quick and sudden shift but there’ll be more development (at least i see it as more development) later on i also know you’re all thinking this is messy as shit but um.. it gets messier! (edit: i changed the layout to make it easier to read LMAO)

tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s

[angelfic]

NIIII <3 congrats on 2k followers! soooo, for the game, i've been thinking: mcu!peter parker x mutual pining x “stop staring at me”

MY LOVELY GIGI!!! thank u so so much!! u are the only one to have requested mcu peter and that me very happy btw like that’s my babygirl sugarplum sweetie pie tbh. hope u enjoy 🤭💌

mcu!peter parker x reader + mutual pining + “stop staring at me”

➺ part of my 2k milestone writing game

“I don’t understand question 10,” you scowl at the paper in front of you, eyes blurring from exhaustion. You and Peter have been trying as hard as you can to not fall asleep on the unfathomably comfortable couch as you do your Math homework for the last couple hours. “What did you get?”

Peter doesn’t answer straight away and you drag your eyes away from all the numbers and symbols to meet his eyes just to find him already looking at you.

“Pete?” you ask, raising an eyebrow and laughing when he snaps out of it and clears his throat. “Stop staring at me and start looking at the question. I need you to work it out so you can help me work it out.”

“Oh, I’ve finished,” he says, fumbling around with his worksheets, a dusting of light pink across his cheeks as you gape at him. “Which question did you need, again?”

“You finished already?” The only reason you don’t scowl at his enviable ability to do Math as easily as breathing is because if anyone can help you understand, it’s Peter. And he never fails to do so. You sigh again and point your pen at the paper. “This one, please.”

Peter leans in and peers at the question, shuffling closer on the couch until his shoulder is pressed against yours. You start hoping that your heart isn’t beating as quickly as it feels like it is, because there’s no way Peter won’t hear it with his stupid spidey-sense.

It seems like you’re in the clear, however, when Peter hands his worksheet over to you and begins explaining the working out.

What you don’t see is how he’s holding back a smile at the sound of your heartbeat when you’re concentrating on the paper, your legs resting over his.

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

I’ve been a lurker for a little bit and I love your stuff, could we pretty please get some Headcanons for Charon or Gob. I’m on my knees over here they have like no fanfic or content 😭

What a coincidence, I literally just posted headcanons for Gob here (NSFW), and our favorite bouncer is next. I also have long-form works for both in the pipe, but the Charon piece already has some serious work done on it.

Charon's writing frustrates me endlessly tbh. He's so intriguing (and fuckable, obviously), but there's so little there in the canon to answer the questions you naturally have about him. So, I may be taking a few liberties here.

Charon (Fallout 3) NSFW Headcanons

I firmly believe he's prewar, and I think he's been enslaved/"under contract" since he became a ghoul. Regardless of how the whole contract thing works, he has the same issue as Gob where he hasn't been allowed to have desires or boundaries, just in a different way (Charon is obviously able to defend himself physically, and even technically has some manner of free will, but he knows that there are often unpleasant consequences for failing to obey his contract holder). The man IS a slave, but a strangely complicated one. If you want meaningless sex, he'll give it to you. Whether or not he actually wants or enjoys it, you'll never know without a real connection or a long, long time of studying his general behavior. He's incredibly hard to read up front, agreeable but not really warm or open.

His contract is supposed to entitle the holder to his labor in combat, so he's not really required to do anything else, as far as I can tell, including have sex with them if they ask, but I think he would use it as a sort of excuse to do so if he was already inclined.

You can't give him the contract or otherwise "free" him from his enslavement in the game, but in my opinion, that's silly. Sure, I think it would take a long time of him getting used to the idea of it, but I also think he'd certainly WANT to no longer be a slave at some point. Eventually, the contract is moreso an excuse. He never takes it from you when you offer it to him; he's following you because he has nowhere else to go, because he wants to. Eventually, he's following you because he's in love with you in his own way. But as long as you physically hold that piece of paper, he has the excuse.

If he does care about you, he will resist your physical advances, at least at first. He believes he's protecting you, as he always does, by sparing you from the social consequences of choosing to be with a ghoul. However, at the end of the day, he wants you, too, and eventually he won't be able to deny himself, especially if he knows you won't deny him. Even then, he'll kind of hate himself for being too weak to not fall in love with you, and he'll feel insanely guilty and selfish for not letting you go like he should. He's a fairly morose man overall, and I think he'd spend a lot of time pondering what the consequences of you two choosing one another this way will inevitably be.

Even with that under consideration, he'd still be happy with you. Keeping you safe and happy is pleasing to him (even if he likes to feign annoyance at your little peculiarities and your choices sometimes), and you'd get to slowly, painstakingly slowly begin to see him sort of begin to become his own man again. Over time, he'll talk more, but it's still almost always to ask about you, to remark about something that isn't himself.

Speaking of which, once he begins to "wake up", so to speak, become more aware of his newly-granted autonomy and his desires, as well as your own, he's gonna be rearing to go all the time. Slowly, he's gonna become fully cognizant of the fact that you really do want him as much as he wants you, so...why shouldn't you be fucking right this second, again? Doesn't really matter where you are. Who's gonna stop him from fucking you? Who's gonna succeed if they try? What I'm saying is this: I hope you're ready to basically be a free-use pocket pussy for this big-ass ghoul.

Some ghouls, like Cooper Howard, were once pretty serious ladies' men who've developed some hard edges over their long lives; despite this, that charisma often remains buried somewhere deep inside them, waiting to jump out at the right person. Charon is not that. This man had zero game before the war and he has less than none now. If you want traditional romantic gestures from him, you are going to have to specifically explain and request them, as unromantic as that may sound on its face. He wants to see you happy, but he's never really had to think romantically, so it doesn't come naturally to him at all. He knows about foreplay as a concept, but lacks patience and finesse when it comes to getting things started. Lots of shoving his hand up your shirt, down your pants sort of awkwardly in the beginning. Roughly groping you to signal he's in the mood to the point where it sort of hurts.

You know what they say about men? The dense ones fuck the hardest. Charon IS that; he's not unintelligent, just a very straightforward thinker. But he's obviously great at following directions, including when you beg him to fuck you until you can't stand.

He's just as quiet during sex as he is normally, save for a few grunts and growls and occasionally asking if you're okay, but you may notice over time that he's more physically affectionate. Likes to stroke your face, pet your hair, pepper you with kisses in a way he usually doesn't. I think he would see you being distracted by him rearranging your guts as an opportunity to be slightly more vulnerable.

Big fan of cockwarming. Already likes to just hold you in his arms while you both do something quiet, but he likes it even more when you're doing whatever you're doing slid down on his cock. His favorite is when you climb up into his lap, naked from the waist down, sink down on him, and immediately take a nap on his chest.

[raisedbythetv89]

OK.

ALRIGHT.

It’s official…I’ve gone insane but it’s all their fault for being such insanely talented actors who gave so much nuance to their performances

I hadn’t given this moment in “Crush” the attention it deserves but the reason it’s so important is this is the first time Buffy lays eyes on Spike after Dawn tells her Spike is completely in love with her and Spike is literally at her house charming her family and planning to ask her out on their first date NOT date aka the biggest and boldest move he has made in an attempt to move them from enemies to lovers

She’s been going on and onnnn about how sick and wrong it is and how freaked out she is about the idea of “the slayer” and “the slayer of slayers” in love since she found out BUT THEN SHE ACTUALLY LAYS EYES ON HIM AND SEES HIM FITTING PERFECTLY INTO HER FAMILY AND LIFE AND MAKING HER MOM SMILE AND HER SISTER FEEL NORMAL AND SAFE and she has this like soft shocked bewilderment and she’s looking to him like “care to explain why you’re sitting on my kitchen counter rn?” (them having secret conversations with just their eyes in front of her family makes me insane 😩) and not one single look of disgust that she’s been claiming to feel all day because she’s surprised and therefore her guards aren’t up

And he’s got his terrified deer in headlights look he gets every time he first sees her unexpectedly 😭

and it’s SO CUTE because he is so terrified and he knows this is lunacy and the idea of them is insane and makes no sense but still in his heart of hearts he is a brave, vulnerable romantic. Shooting his shot just like he did with Cecily because “fella’s gotta try” compared to Angel who stalked her for over a YEAR before introducing himself and was the most wishy-washy, bread crumbing mother fucker when it came to actually being with her and Riley who had to be told he liked her and then had to get a bunch of help from Willow before he even made a move. Riley and Angel are genuinely both cowards who want to play the hero but never truly had the courage to do so which is why they always infantilized and shamed/guilted Buffy into being smaller to make them feel bigger which is the CORE of why Spike is literally the only one of all of Buffy’s romantic interests worthy of her because of his bravery, despite knowing with the utmost certainty he will fail and get hurt over and over again, that doesn’t stop him from trying anyway. He’s the only one brave enough and tbh crazy enough to love Buffy Summers in the ways she both needs and deserves.

And I SWEAR the softness in her gaze and overall demeanor of dazed bewilderment and considering what she’s seeing in front of her just gives off this vibe to me that a part of her really likes the scene she’s walked into, the part of her Dawn represents that’s considering, again (but now with new light because I think she’s already considered it after “Something Blue”) what her life would be like if she dated Spike. It’s this TINY MOMENT of her girlhood that still exists under her slayer armor shining through - she’s seeing her (forbidden) crush after finding out she’s his (forbidden) crush too and he’s in her kitchen!! Making an effort with her family and he’s so CUTE and laughing and she basically classic Buffy swoons over a cute boy for just a second before her armor is back on and it’s actually too much for me

AND SPIKE uggghh 😭 he shifts sitting up taller like his inner William standing up when his lady walks in combined with his punk persona that meets every challenge head on but always with a bit of attitude and swagger. Already ready for the battle that is William the Bloody trying to love The Slayer.

This tiny moment of unspoken communication and body language perfectly encompasses what they both bring out in and give to each other and I’m obsessed. Spike brings out the abandoned young girl who is soft and vulnerable and just needs love and support and Buffy gives our brave, big-hearted, protective warrior looking for his place of belonging and people finally worthy of his love that he can care for and protect.

Am I insane for writing all of this about a 2 second clip? Yes, yes I am but this moment is IMPORTANT and it happens so quickly yet it contains so much and completely backs up what I already knew about this episode which was that the only reason Buffy was making such a big deal about Spike being in love with her is because she’s VERY attracted to him but that was so much easier to ignore before she knew the feelings were reciprocated. If she didn’t care about Spike she wouldn’t care about his feelings because they would be of no consequence to her but now…. her crush on her mortal enemy that’s killed two slayers wasn’t a big deal because it was literally never gonna happen…… suddenly could happen and she was SO unprepared for how to handle all of that and so overcompensating the entire episode and beyond 😹😹😹 because also it’s been well established how perceptive Spike is about how people are doing and what they’re feeling so when he says he knows there is something between them he’s not being delusional he is right on the money which freaks her out even more because how could he know about something she didn’t know about herself AGAIN 😹

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Pairing : Idol!Seo Changbin x F!Reader TW : small car accident ; Changbin is momentarily insensitive ; angsty ; but also fluffy at the end ; Word Count : 3.2k Request : @kurolils : i'm not gonna be so specific, my delulu a*s has just been craving angst so much with changbin (my bias) or with lee know (tbh, your lee know imagine kinda calmed that craving), so you can just choose the plot, be free, just please with some fluff... cuz my fragile heart can't take too much 🥺. A/N : I FINALLY GOT TO THE REQUEST! I DIDN'T FORGET ABOUT IT, I'VE JUST BEEN FRAZZLED!! YOU SENT IT IN ABOUT 3 MONTHS AGO AND I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT!! Also, the I found the gif on this blog!!

“You’re gonna be there, right? You’re coming?” Changbin asked as he grabbed his keys off the hook, his eyes wide and his bottom lip already slightly jutting out as he looked at you. It was the same thing every time he had a comeback show, and you gave him the same answer every time he asked the question. 

“I’m gonna be there, Binnie.” You reassured him, leaning against with your arms crossed in front of your chest. He was so cute when he was like this, and truth be told, it felt nice to know that he wanted you there, he always wanted you there. “I wouldn’t miss it for anything, plus, when was the last time I’ve missed one of your comeback shows? Hmm?” 

He hummed softly as he thought for a moment, and then, as if a lightbulb went off above his head, his finger began waving in your direction. “The second comeback show during Maxident. You had that really bad stomach bug and you couldn’t even get out of bed.” Your mouth fell open to protest, but he chuckled softly as his arms wrapped around you. “I know it doesn’t count. I was just answering your question.” 

You rolled your eyes although he couldn’t see it considering your face was buried in his chest. “Well I’m not sick now, and I’m going to be there. You have to get there first though, gotta get all pretty for Stay.” His arms were like constrictors, keeping you close and holding you tighter when you tried to pull away from him. “Binnie~~” You playfully whined and you lightly pushed back against him. “You’re gonna be late. You need to go now… I’ll see you soon.” You tilted your head back to kiss him, smiling against his lips when they were against yours. “I love you, now go… Go, go, go.” 

Not many people knew about yours and Changbins relationship, aside from the guys and a few of the staff members that would let you in the back doors for concerts and shows like this, but other than that, your relationship was completely off the grid. It’s not that you both wanted to keep your relationship hidden forever, it’s just that with the group at the peak of their fame, you didn’t want a dating scandal to ruin what they worked so hard to achieve. 

That’s why you’d leave the house two hours after him, just to make sure that anyone who might’ve been watching him would have left already too. You had even gotten your own fake staff card, just so that if anyone were to ever ask, you could say that you worked with them, that you were Changbins personal staff. You couldn’t be more thankful for the ones that did know, they were doing their best to make it easier for you and Bin to be together and you appreciated it more than anything. 

“Is she here yet?” Changbin asked from his chair as the makeup artist finished up what she had to do. It was clear that he was getting agitated, there was only 15 minutes left before he had to go on stage and you had never been this late before. You hadn’t even responded to his texts, you weren’t responding to the other guys either. It wasn’t like you to be like that, and the only thing he could even think to have happened was that you fell asleep. You must’ve laid down at some point and that’s why you weren’t there or responding. 

That thought failed to make him feel better though. How could you just fall asleep knowing that he needed you there? Did you even care about how this makes him feel? How was he supposed to perform without you there? Why would you say you’d be there and then just… not show up? He was pissed. “Changbin, it’s time for you to go out… What do you want us to do if she shows up while you’re performing though?” 

Changbin sighed, going to the door to take one last look, just to see if you had come or not… Of course, you weren’t there. Was he not important to you anymore? Do you not care that he needs you, that he can’t perform his best when you’re not in the crowd? “Tell her to go back home.” He huffed, turning away, trying his best to look like your absence wasn’t literally destroying him. 

The other guys could see it though, they could feel it radiating off of him. His anger, his disappointment, his sadness. His moves weren’t as powerful, his voice wasn’t as loud as usual. The performance in general was weak, and everyone could tell that he was antsy to run off the stage once the performance was over. 

“Look, Changbin… She makes it to literally all of your other performances… There’s gotta be a legitimate reason she didn’t make it to this one.” Jisung tried to calm Changbin down as he followed behind him to go backstage. “She wouldn’t just not show up for no reason.” 

“She was fine when I left today. She wasn’t sick like that last time.” Changbin explained, dropping down into his chair in front of the mirror and ripping the makeup removing wipes from the bag. “If she didn’t want to come she should have just told me.” He roughly rubbed the wipes over his face, leaving his skin red and slightly blotchy when he was done. “I was shit out there… I was so upset! What is STAY gonna think? What is everyone gonna think?!” 

“Calm down, man.” Jisung tried once again, patting Changbins shoulder as he sat in the chair beside him. “You weren’t shit, I couldn’t even tell that you were upset. You’re worrying too much.” He grabbed the water bottle off the table and handed it to Changbin, motioning for it to drink it. “Just take a deep breath, I’m sure there’s a good reason.” 

“She hasn’t even tried to-“ His phone started vibrating on the table, the number unknown, and he was hesitant to answer it but with Jisungs urging, he answered just before it stopped ringing. “Who’s this?” He asked, his agitation ringing through in his tone, but he heard the heavy sigh from the other end and he knew it was you. “A lot of nerve you have to call after the performance is already over. If you weren’t going to come you should have told me before I left.” 

“You’re just gonna jump to conclusions before I even tell you what happened?” He scoffed loudly at your question, and out of the corner of his eyes he could see Jisung shaking his head. “Do you not even care what happened?” 

“Do you not care about me?” He retorted, jumping up from his chair, his irritation fueling him to pace back and forth across the room. “I waited for you to show up until the last minute! You didn’t call me! You didn’t text me! Do you know how I felt?!” He practically shouted into the phone, unaware that everyone in the room was now watching him, wincing at not only the loudness, but also the lack of concern for whatever it was that you could have been saying. 

“There was an accident…” You whispered, and he could barely hear your words over his heavy breaths. “I couldn’t get there… I was trying to…” You continued, and although you couldn’t see it, he rolled his eyes, throwing his one hand up in frustration before running it through his hair. 

“If you loved me enough you would have found a way around the accident to get here, to be here for me.” Now that his back was turned to the wall and he was facing the rest of the guys, he could see the mortified looks on their faces. None of them were used to him being this big of a jerk, and while he wasn’t looking at himself that way, clearly they were. Not that he cared, he was pissed. To him, it was simple enough, just go around the accident, find a different route. He would have done it for you if you wanted him to be somewhere for him. 

“Well I’m so sorry that I couldn’t go around the accident considering I was in it, Changbin.” You shouted back, and then the call was ended. Changbin froze in his spot, his phone still at his ear as he stared at the guys who looked just as shocked as he did even though they didn’t even hear what you had said. He immediately tried to call you back, but it kept going to the hospital line and he didn’t know your room number so he didn’t even know how to get a hold of you. 

“Someone… Someone look on the news or something… About a car accident, a car accident…” He stammered, unable to get his hands to stop shaking long enough to do the search himself. Once the accident was brought up, everyone started panicking, and all the guys in the room, including the staff members who were all scrolling through their phones at once. Sharp gasps and whispered curses filled the room as they apparently all came across the headline story, and Changbin went to Jeongin who happened to be the closest, yanking the youngest boys phone from his hand to read the news. 

A small fender bender had turned into a massive pileup on the highway, and while there was no set number for how many people had been injured or worse, judging by the amount of cars in the overhead picture at the top of the article, he was sure that it would be a lot. You were lucky to have made it out, to have been able to call him as quickly as you did considering how recent the accident had happened. He was lucky that you weren’t severely injured or worse. 

“I need to get… I need to get to the hospital…” The words rolled out of Changbins mouth, although he wasn’t as loud now, and he was tripping over every syllable. His hands were still shaking and now his entire body seemed to tremble as well. There was no way that he’d be able to drive himself there, and there was no way any of the guys would allow him to be on the road in that state, especially considering the news story that had him wanting to rush to the hospital in the first place was about an accident. 

Bangchan stood up, slipping his phone into his pocket and then walking over to Changbin, taking Jeongins phone out of his hand and handing it back to the maknae before ushering Changbin out of the room. “I’ll take you there, you need to calm down first though.” He was trying his best to calm him down, squeezing his shoulder and rubbing his back, but nothing seemed to be working. “Look, you know she’s alright. She called you. If there was anything seriously wrong, you wouldn’t have even gotten a phone call.” 

And while the words were meant to be a means of reassuring him, Changbin could only shiver at the thought of something worse happening to you. What if something worse had happened? “I was so mad…” He mumbled, running his hands through his hair. “I yelled at her… I didn’t even listen… I’m the worst boyfriend in the world…” He was already worked up, but the more he spoke, the shakier his voice got, and it almost sounded like the words got stuck in his throat at one point as he started to sob. “What if she doesn’t want to see me? What if… If she kicks me out of the room? What if she sends me home?” 

“Then you go home and you give her space…” Bangchan said, clearly not giving Changbin the answer that he had wanted. His head whipped so fast to look at the leader, his eyes wide, questioning whether that was something that he should really do. “Look… I know that you don’t want to go home… But you did kind of yell at her and you probably made her feel like shit, and you didn’t even listen to her… She was in a car accident and you… You were selfish.” 

Shit. He was selfish… You probably didn’t want to be around him at all. Should he even go to the hospital at all? No… That question was stupid, even if you didn’t want to see him, he had to see you at least once to make sure you were okay. He climbed into the passenger seat of Chans car and slumped down as he put on his seatbelt. “What if she breaks up with me, hyung?” Changbin mumbled, his hands vigorously rubbing over his face as his tears fell slowly. “I can’t… I can’t perform without her… I can’t do anything without her.” 

Chan sighed as he started up the car, driving slowly down the highway that was backed up still from the accident. He tried not to look at it, but Changbin had leaned forward to look around Chan as he drove by, his eyes widening when he saw the damage that was done, and then a small gasp mingled with a sob escaped him when he saw your car in the pileup. “She’s okay, Bin. You’ve talked to her…” 

But Changbin shook his head, his breaths shallow and quick as his head fell forward. “I yelled at her… Do you see what she went through… And I yelled at her… I’m awful. I don’t deserve her…” He muttered, curling up into himself and resting his forehead against his knees. “How could I… I just assumed… Which isn’t right… I trust her… She said she’d be there and…” 

He was beginning to ramble, his words barely even making sense, he was panicking both inwardly and outwardly and Chan was becoming increasingly worried about his friend. “Take a deep breath. Everything is going to be fine. I’m not gonna say it will be right now, but… She’s not going to be mad forever.” And Changbin knew that Chans honesty was, although disheartening, what he needed to hear. He didn’t want to walk into the hospital with the hope that everything would be 100% fine, it would only crush him more if you were to kick him out. He needed to he ready for anything. 

Honestly, you weren’t sure why the hospital was still keeping you there. You were fine, well, as fine as you could be, but you knew that it could be worse. You were one of the lucky ones, and all you wanted to do was go home and curl up next to Changbin because, even though he was an ass, he was your safe spot, and you wanted nothing more than to feel safe after what you had just gone through. 

The knock at the door had you sitting up, expecting Changbin to come in when you told him to, but instead the doctor peaked around the door with a smile before coming in fully. “How are you feeling?” He asked, and the question made you roll your eyes as your head continued to throb. “I know, it’s not the best situation but… It could have been worse. You’re lucky.” And you were, you knew that you were. 

“Right… Thank you.” You mumbled, leaning back in the bed and looking up at the tv that was turned to the news station, the helicopter cameras giving an aerial shot of just how bad the accident had been. “How long do I have to be here?” You tried to sound like it wasn’t annoying to feel stuck there, but the doctor could clearly see that you were more than ready to go home. 

“You hit your head quite hard, we just want to keep you overnight to make sure you don’t have any sort of concussion.” You sighed heavily, sinking further down into the bed and pulling the blanket up around you. “The nurse will be around in a little bit to check your gauze and change it. Try to get some rest or relax.” He patted the end of your bed, offering you a sympathetic smile before leaving you alone once again. 

You didn’t have anything. Your phone and your purse had been left in the car when you were taken to the hospital, you were hoping that it would be retrieved and given back to you at some point, but it didn’t seem like that point would be any time soon. Another knock had you groaning loudly, expecting the nurse now as you mumbled out a “Come in…” just loud enough for the nurse to hear. 

“My baby!” Changbin practically screamed as he rushed through the door, running straight to your bed and cupping your face in his hands. “I’m so sorry! Where does it hurt!? Are you in pain?! I’m so glad you’re alright!” He took a moment to look you over, noticing the way the gauze around your head was stained slightly red. “My beautiful girl… You must have been so scared… Are you okay?” 

His voice softened and you felt the sudden urge to cry as you looked at him. You didn’t care that he had been an asshole on the phone, all you had wanted was for him to be there, and here he was. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer, breathing in his scent and letting out the breath in a shaky sob. “It was awful… All I wanted was you… I kept asking for you, for them to get you… I needed you…” You whispered against his shirt, gripping onto it tightly. 

You heard him sniffle softly beside your ear before his lips pressed quick kisses across your face. “I’m here… I’m so sorry… I know you’re probably mad at me… But I don’t want to leave you until I know you’re better.” He whispered through a shaky breath, and when he pulled back your eyes were more sad than before as you stared at him. “You’re gonna leave me?” You questioned, your eyes quickly dropping down to your hands that were worriedly picking at the fabric of the hospital blanket. “I’m… I’m not mad. I know that you wanted me there… And I would have called you to let you know what happened as soon as I got here, but my phone and my purse are still in the car…” 

A quiet gasp escaped his pursed lips before he gently tilted your head up, pressing a kiss to your lips and then your nose and then giving you a small smile. “I’m not leaving you… I’m gonna stay right here…” He pointed to the floor beside your bed and then grabbed your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. “We’re gonna go home together, and then I’m gonna take care of you until you feel 100% better. Then… I don’t care what anyone says, when I do shows, you’re coming with me. One scare is enough for a lifetime… and I want to spend my lifetime with you. I’m never leaving you alone again.”