#I’m starting to think most of you guys are aroace too because why is this soooo ??

[sqwdkllr]

fuck radiosilence/radiostatic fans fucking ruin me with the extremely relatable aroace perspective in their creative works. I don’t think I would have ever predicted genuinely getting emotional over some guy with a screen face and a guy with a fucked haircut. This is so awful why are you guys some of the most talented writers I have ever seen

How am I supposed to sleep and move on with my life after reading an aroace character realize they are different and it’s not common and find themselves mourning for that connection while detesting it outright? Fucks sake just gut me instead it would hurt less than this

[that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction]

Okay, if you were asked who are in Merlin BBC that you can see based on canon that are gay/bi/pan/demi, which characters are they? Why?

I’m just gonna note that I’m not attached to any sexuality headcanon because people are going to have different opinions and it seems daft to lose more than half the fan content (art, fics, etc) just because of a headcanon. I’ll read more or less anything, I play around with queer themes in my writing fairly regularly and multiship everyone in the show, sometimes with characters from other fandoms too, but these are the sexualities I’ve written most of for each character otherwise this would be way too long.

And I know I’m assigning modern understandings of sexuality to medieval characters, but it’s a show with dragons and magic, also capes, a French castle, and whatever the hell that chainmail was so I think I can be excused for my historical inaccuracy.

Merlin: either gay or bi with a a preference for men. I could never get myself to really like Freya in the show, she wasn’t bad and I didn’t hate her, I usually just forget about her because it was one episode so I didn’t have enough time to get attached. She deserved more screen time and I love what the fandom has done with her character, but I usually see her where Merlin’s shipped with someone else so I honestly forget their romance exists most of the time. Other than that, I usually see him shipped with knights or Arthur or if he’s shipped with another woman, it’s someone who didn’t get enough screen time to get attached, or a mergwenthur (is that their ship name?) poly relationship.

Arthur: bi and demi. He needs time to like someone, canonically only started wearing a shirt after he got married but he walked around his chambers naked when it was just Merlin/no sexual implications in a servant of two masters. I’ve done deep dive character analysis into that and what it says for their trust of one another if anyone’s interested. It goes into them being platonic but acting like a couple and why meant so much for me to see as a kid and also why I think that proves their relationship is more than words can fully encapsulate. Also he’s had crushes on men and women so bi just fits.

Gwen: bi with a preference for men, she and Morgana had chemistry and I ship them pre season 3 but after that, not so much. Also had crushes on Lancelot, Merlin and married Arthur. They’re an adorable couple, honestly I love them. I don’t really have much else to say.

Morgana: aroace lesbian. Just my favourite headcanon, I like that she never had a canon relationship but she definitely had chemistry with Gwen. They’re just sweet together. I don’t know, mostly just vibes and my desire for more aroace rep.

Lancelot: bi with a preference for women. Gwen and Merlin. Yeah, that’s pretty much all I have to say. I just love that he’s such a great guy, I don’t think there’s anything more to it than two crushes in canon and vibes. I’ve written him as unlabelled or queer a fair amount, it really just depends.

Leon: Romance and sex averse aroace. Again, I just want representation and think he’s cool. I’ve seen him shipped with others, but I tend to default to aroace Leon in my own works more than anything else. Occasionally I’ll give him a qpr but it just depends on what I’m writing.

Gwaine: aromatic pansexual, he likes flirting but I think the idea of a permanent long term relationship would be “the one to tie him down” and it never entirely fits right. I’ve seen him shipped with Percival, I love that but usually if I’m writing it, I’ll have them in a qpr. I think he definitely feels low levels of romantic attraction but not enough to want a romantic relationship with someone, he loves so much, just not in the traditional ways and writing aroallo Gwaine is always super fun.

Elyan: I headcanon Elyan as trans masc but I don’t think I’ve got any specific headcanons for his sexuality. I’ve probably written him straight slightly more than anything else, but it’s a close tie between writing him straight and bi. It never usually comes up, so maybe just unlabelled or queer. I don’t know, he’s just Elyan. That’s all really.

Percival: I know in canon he had a wife and kids, I write him as being gay more than anything else, but my main headcanon tends to be that he’s bi or pan. Purely based on vibes but if it’s not relevant to the plot, I won’t bother mentioning it.

[billcyphersballsack]

Spoilers for the funny timeloop game

A big factor I think is fun to consider in the “a different party member is looping” AUs is why the characters keep it to themselves, and also how they’d behave at their tipping point, and most of all how they’d s specifically dehumanize the rest of the party by the end like how Siff starts calling them actors on a stage. If I may throw my two silver coins in the pool

Mirabell would experience major chosen one guilt. She’d see the loops as an opportunity to make the head house maiden (I’m gonna say HHM from here on out for her btw) proud for choosing her and also the rest of Dormont. She’d do everything to keep everyone safe of course, really starting the downward spiral after her first failure to defeat the king. But after meeting with HHM and having the loop corrupt I think she’d experience major religious guilt. She failed her house and she already thinks she’s following the change belief wrong because of her aroace status so I think she’d start assuming this was all a punishment for her sins that needed correcting. Her party members becoming nothing more then her entourage as she is the vessel of change, and at their worst they’re obstacles to her redemption. She doesn’t even wait for them to start talking shit about her at the clock tower before she decides to go it alone I think

A lot of Odile loops aus or maybe just the one I’ve seen have her as a diligent note taker. Real. I think she’d be unwilling to tell the party because I think she’s smart enough to figure out why the loops are happening immediately. But she refuses to believe that dumb wish she made on the tree she doesn’t believe in could actually do anything so she pushes that fear to the back of her mind and forgets about it till the end. She follows exact scripts and does everything perfectly for the first few loops but I think given the fact she’s the only one who attacks you in the finale fight she has it in her to start distancing herself form the party super quick. Even before meeting HHM she starts seeing the group as lab rats minus Bonnie to test out possible scenarios both to their benefit or to their detriment but after the meeting they become nothing more then Serial numbers, Bonnie included, and she couldn’t care less when it comes to their safety since she can just restart whenever she likes

Isa is tricky because he’s too sweet a guy I think but that’s what’s fun about it. I think he’d have a full blown identity crisis, I think lying to his friends and keeping secrets more intense then a little crush would eat at him, I think the fact his friends can’t remember all the things they’ve shared in the loops would make him feel hopeless over time, I think the fact they can’t remember when he was cold to them in later loops would get on his nerves. He’s a bundle of emotions and keeps the loops from the others just because he’s worried about them seeing him differently now that he has this ability, and after he meets the HHM he’s erratic and all over the place mentally. I’m taking a que from his backstory using body craft and saying his friends become shapeless formless husks over time that he can’t see as anything but failed clay sculptures. For an extra bit of sadness he finally confesses to siff in one of the loops before the last one and it’s big and perfectly choreographed but Sif gets overwhelmed and is himself worried how isa would feel if he knew more about Sif so they turn him down. And from then on he goes through the 5 stages of grief treating Sif worse and worse each loop because all of their good chemistry and funny banter is soured by the fact it will never happen. When the final fight ends he confesses it more like he’s telling Sif he’s got weeks to live, quiet and subdued and apologetic, and Sif accepts this time because it was genuine and they know a lot more about each other now

Bonnie tells Odile. Every time without fail. Sometimes they let Mira and Isa in on it, sometimes they insist it stay between them, sometimes they don’t tell the whole truth and pass it off as a prophetic dream or a hunch or something. But they always tell her. And they never tell Sif. Bonnie would obviously start getting stronger because of the loops and would eventually show off to Sif that they didn’t need his protection anymore, and that’s when the two can have their heart to heart and they’d trust him more. But after that loop fails Bonnie would become more and more agitated, aggressive, they’d snap at the others and become increasingly annoyed they treat them like a baby when they’re more powerful then all of them. It’s after the HHM that they stop telling Odile, they stop getting excited about snacks they stop chiming in with jokes and everyone assumes, naturally, that the kid is obviously stressed and they leave it be. On the last loop they absolutely lose it on the others and that’s when they all agree to leave them at the clocktower because this is too much for them. I wanna say the party becomes something like dolls to Bonnie, and that they feel as though they’re too old for dolls now

That’s it that’s the post

[inlovewithaspiderguy]

Thoughts on tua s4e5 and the start of the season - spoilers ahead

So, Five/Lila. I wanted to share what I thought ever since I watched episode one of season 4, and then I forgot to do it and I saw more eps so this will be less detailed than I wanted.

My first idea was to do two analysis of Five and Lila, one in-media and out-media. However I found that in-media the show wrote them well over the season and you do understand why they get closer and eventually together in episode 5. I had been spoiled about it before I watched so I was looking for signs but it was well done. No comment about that, it doesn’t feel forced for them this season.

I guess my biggest critic is out-media: why? why did the writers do that. (I’ll admit I didn’t read the comics so I don’t know if the show just made it up. If not, I’ll have a contract on your head mr way). I’m not a fan of breaking a ship apart, and I fail to see the reason for them to do that. I mean, diego babysitting stan in s3 showed he was ready to have a more stable life with lila. and then suddenly they can’t stand each other? ok, transitioning from assassin to full time parents has gotta be rough, as lila put it, but it means they need to work on what they want in their marriage. this rocky diego/lila situation is not my thing.

And then to compensate and have a taste of her old actionful life she gets with five? A man that’s both older AND younger than her? it kinda weirded me out from her. As much as I appreciate their love-hate dynamic I don’t like it turning into actual romantic stuff. And from five’s pov… it’s hard to think he would do that to his brother. I’m not gonna talk about my aroace five headcanon, that’s not the right time, I’m just confused that five who I believe to be a stand-up guy, would get with a married woman. And the thing I hated most so far is when she wanted to leave and he’d rather she stayed, he hid the cypher thing from her. He was also very possessive when they argued about it and ugh.

It’s a strange situation. They’ve been stuck in the reality subway for years, does it make their thing okay? I wonder, in-media, what would have happened if they didn’t get trapped there. I guess we’ll never know. (I really thought the ship with five we would get to latch onto the most would be with his assistant, Derek. but I was wrong.) I’m gonna watch episode 6 tomorrow night, and I’m intrigued to see if they’re gonna get out (I think they will) and how both of them are gonna behave towards Diego. Lila was clear she wanted her children back so I believe she’ll go back to the suburban life she will now appreciate, and five will keep the secret too but will always be in pain because he can’t be with the woman he loves yada yada yada I’m not being original and I hope the show surprises me.

I wonder if some people shipped five and lila before this season. I genuinely hope they’re happy. I’m not interested in ship wars, I just know if my ship became canon I’d be excited. peace and love on planet fandom.

[our-transmasculine-experience]

i don't need advice or anything, just wanted to vent (sorry) due to a conversation i had with my mom recently. i generally identify as genderqueer, but my parents (and most other cis people) don't understand and don't want to understand what that's supposed to mean, so i generally say i'm a trans guy.

i'm not really fully out; i came out to my parents impulsively and then after two months of arguing we made a "deal" that i would wait until 18 to socially transition. despite that, i still try to get my hair cut as short as possible and i tell my school friends i'm trans. because frankly that deal is bullshit and if it's been 2 years and i still want to be a boy surely they can tell it's not just a phase?

idk. last night i was with my mom after i'd gotten my hair trimmed, and she'd been complaining the whole time about how i'd try to ""trick"" barbers into cutting my hair super short. i asked her if, when i turned 18 and decided i still wanted to transition, she'd love me the same.

and she straight up said "no". she said she'd be unhappy and while she'd still care about me, she'd probably be more distant. i get the feeling she'd continue to treat me as a girl as well.

she says she still sees me as a girl because i only started wanting to be a boy "recently". i explained to her i've been exploring my gender since 9 (when i joined amino, i once mentioned how i wanted to change my gender all the time and my online friends told me about being trans and genderfluid etc etc). my mom thinks that it's only because i'm way too online that i think i'm trans. because when i was super young i would do "girly things", and all trans people "act trans" from childhood. and if i were really a guy i would want to kiss girls.

and that's. so frustrating. both because i've TOLD HER i'm aroace, and also because she knows there's no such thing as girly/boyish things. besides, i also played video games and hung out with more girls than boys and watched superhero shows. that doesn't make me a boy, so why would liking frozen and mlp and barbie make me a girl? and why does it matter if i feel happier being called a boy? why can't she accept that? fucking hell

sorry for the long vent just had to get this off my chest

i’m so sorry about this, anon. i hope you feel better!

[rainydaydally]

You’re like the light of my life

WARNINGS:

Dysphoria

Sexuality crisis

Insecurity

Crying/Kinda a mental breakdown

Jealousy

F-slur

Cartman is homophobic but in a joke way (hes gay)

Unsafe binding (I don’t think you are supposed to swim in a binder, but I’m not sure!)

The Broflovski family is staying in a hotel after camping, and Shiela and Gerald are napping in one bed, and Ike is napping in the other. Kyle, however, is laying next to Ike, wide awake. He takes his mind off of everything, starting to use pinterest on his phone. He gets bored pretty quickly, so he places it next to his head. As he stares at the white ceiling of the hotel, he starts to think. Think about way too much confusing things he cant help but focus on. He thinks about his sexuality, his friends, his looks- *especially* his looks. He sighs, fighting back tears as he grabs his headphones and phone and walks to the bathroom. He stares at himself in the mirror, listening to Mac DeMarco, as he feels tears fall from his eyes. He cries and cries, and he moves to sit on the closed toilet lid, knees up to his chest, tears spilling uncontrollably. He takes his phone out to text his friend, Stan.

“Hey. Can you call?”

No reply. “He’s probably busy.” He thinks to himself, setting his phone down. He decides to call Cartman, which even though he hates him, he can still cheer him up with his blunt and annoying comments and jokes. Kyle tries opening up to him about his sexuality, which he has also been really confused about. Cartman just says “F*g.” which causes him and Kyle to burst into a silent laughter, making it funnier that he cant laugh, or he will wake his family. After Kyle angrily hangs up on Cartman after some dumb shit he was saying, he goes and sits against the wall, and continues crying. He wipes his nose and his eyes but the tears never seem to stop coming. He’s just so, so confused. One day he will think he’s AroAce, and the next day he will get butterflies when he sees a cute boy at a store. He feels like everyone around him is getting into stable relationships now, like Stan and Wendy. Oh how he wishes he had a relationship like them, they seem so perfect. Suddenly, his phone lights up. 

“Yeah.” 

It’s Stan. 

“Nevermind.” 

Kyle quickly replies back, he doesn’t want Stan to see him so hysterical.

“Oh, okay.”

“Can I tell you something??”

Kyle texts, instantly regretting his decision.

“Of course.” 

Stan replies. Kyle can almost hear the text in Stan’s voice, as if he was right next to him. Before Kyle knows it, he’s confessing deep, dark secrets to Stan over text. His fingers tapping the letters quickly.

“Okay, so this is stupid. But, I feel like everyone loves someone, or someone loves them. I know we are still young but im just so ugly and unwantable and I feel like I might be Aromantic Asexual, but I’m just so confused because I want a relationship. I really have never had someone have a crush on me because I’m so ugly and I’ve always been the ugly one too, and I feel like I’m nothing. Most of the guys are so handsome, and I really dont fit in compared to the rest of them. When we were on vacation at the beach I just felt so sick and insecure because you guys (not trying to be weird) looked really good in your bathing suits, but I just felt uncomfy and I just didnt fit in with you guys.”

“I can’t believe I just texted Stan that.” He thinks, and Stan seems to be taking hours to respond, even though it’s only been 5 seconds at the maximum.

“You are not ugly, I really don’t think you are ugly.”

Why did Kyle feel a feeling in his stomach when Stan had texted him that? Stan not only said he wasnt ugly, but he said HE really doesn’t think he is. 

“You definitely fit in. We don’t care what you look like. You think you are ugly, but no one is our friend group thinks you are ugly.”

Kyle smiles, “Except Cartman.” He thinks to himself. An other text appears.

“I’m sorry but what does aromantic asexual mean?”

Kyle knew this would happen. Most people don’t know what it means He tries to explain it, hoping Stan will understand what he’s trying to say.

“Thanks so much, Dude. Also, it means like you’re not attracted to anyone and dont wanna have sex with anyone basically. But I’m just not sure yet because I’ve never had a crush where the other person really liked me. I mean, I’ve dated people but it was mostly over text and facetime. We never hugged or kissed or anything. I’m probably just asexual, but sometimes I have a crush on someone and later it goes away.”

Kyle continues.

“And I’ve only kissed two people before, and I know thats two more than most people our age. I just feel really terrible for not feeling anything towards them. I mean, they were both girls, so I could be gay.”

Kyle desperately wants to tell Stan about his dysphoria, how his mother keeps telling him he looks just like her, and that he hates how feminine his body is getting. He does not say a word.

“You do have that rizz. I’ve never really talked to anybody in a romantic way before besides Wendy… and that hot sub we had in 3rd grade.”

“Dude! Gross! Also thanks. I just don’t know if I want it, I guess. I mean, your first kiss is supposed to be magical, but I felt nothing. I didn’t think I’d be kissing a girl in a pool bathroom who never even thought of me romantically.”

It was Bebe. Now she acts like nothing happened, but it did, and she knows it did. She is so perfect and pretty and smart, so why didn’t he like her?

“I wasted it. It sucked.”

“Wow. You never told me that before.” 

Stan replies. Kyle feels bad for not sharing it with him before, but it just never seemed appropriate. 

“Yeah. I’m still friends with her, and I don’t want to seem mean, but I really wasted my first kiss.”

“You know how in the movies their first kiss is like amazing magical stuff? Well, we are weird, crazy teenagers that go through stuff and things do not always go according to plan, and that’s ok. I know you will find a perfect kiss one day.”

Kyle really wants to just text Stan right then and there and tell him everything, that Stan sometimes gives him butterflies, and when the backs of their hands graze he feels his face heat up. He can’t tell him that, though, obviously. He doesn’t want to ruin Stan and Wendy’s relationship over a *maybe* crush.

“Dude, I don’t deserve you, I love you so much. You are way too kind and caring.”

“I love you too, bro.” 

Stan replies. Kyle feels a smile grow on his face.

“Also, I don’t mean to be nosy, but who was your first kiss?”

Kyle was really hoping Stan wouldn’t ask that. 

“She would get mad if I told you.”

Is all Kyle replies with.

“That’s okay.”

Kyle continues with his rant.

“I’m going through so much right now though. I hate being trans so much, I’m so jealous of everyone who isn’t tbh.”

“I’m sorry, I’m glad you are telling me so I can try my best to help you through it.”

Kyle sighs. How can Stan be so kind to him? Like he said before, he really doesn’t deserve to be best friends with such a sweet boy.

“I love you so much, you’re like the light of my life.”

Kyle jokes, smiling while thinking about hanging out with Stan. 

Suddenly, theres a loud knock at the door. “Kyle? Kyle, are you in there?” “Oh shit, it’s mom!” He thinks. “Yeah!” He replies, trying not to have his voice break from the crying that was happening before. “Kyle, we’re going to the pool soon. Ike and Dad already left. Do you want to come? I know you’re uncomfortable at the pool-” “I’ll go. Give me a second, though.” Kyle grumbles, sitting up and wiping his tears with the back of his hand. He would be looking foward to the pool- he really loves to swim- but lately he’s been so uncomfortable going, like his mom said. He hates going because he doesn’t know what to wear, and if he wears his binder with his trunks people give him such weird looks. He changes into the clothes nonetheless and steps outside the bathroom, arms crossing over his chest.

Shiela must have noticed he was insecure, because she went up to him and hugged him. “You are such a wonderful son, Kyle.” Kyle feels his stomach turn as he tries his best to hold back his tears, but they spill out again. Instead this time, he isn’t silent. His sobs are loud as he holds onto his mother. She lets go of the hug and walks him to sit on the edge of the bed together. “Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?” She asks. He shakes his head, wiping his tears. “Can we just stay like this for a while?” He asks. “Of course.”

AO3 Link: You’re like the light of my life

Wattpad Link: You’re like the light of my life

[sirwow]

As I’m currently resting my wrist from drawing and I’m still thinking out more detailed story beats for WC I thought I’d just do some random rambling about my Pikmin au that won’t be very organized lol. Also adding a cut here as not to flood anyone’s unfortunate timeline

First off since I imagine I’ll get asked this someone someday, a small list of all the local losers preferences.

Olimar - Straight Cis. Doesn’t really get anything outside his bubble but is supportive regardless.

Louie - AroAce Cis (also has the tism). His only love is food.

Alph - GayDemi Cis. Likes love but not actively looking for it.

Brittany - GayDemi Cis. Her and Alph always laugh about the fact people think they’re dating just because they show physical affection to one another sometimes.

Charlie - Bi Cis. Koppite crew is literally the LGB.

Pom - Straight trans. You are not safe from Pingo propaganda.

Terry - Bi Cis. Probably doesn’t even know what being bi is and just thinks he has to make up his mind.

Penelope - Pan cis. Olimars shock when he found out when they were dating that she found girls cute too.

Zack - Pan trans. Saw he had 13 brothers and said wouldn't it be funny to have another.

Yorke - Straight cis. The most gay looking straight guy.

Nelle - Straight cis. to yorke "i hate you sm. wanna kiss"

Dobbs - Gay cis. Charlie and Dobbs are the local toxic yaoi so sorre

Shepherd - AroBi cis. the only dates that exist are DOG PARK dates.

Collin - BiDemi cis. Currently married to coffee and 4 hours of sleep

Russ - Straight cis. Probably does have a wife but no kids

Yonny - AroAce non-binary (F to NB) masculine presenting. Galaxy record for being the first person to survive giving top surgery to himself.

Dingo - Straight cis. Yonny makes fun of his failure of flirting.

Bernard - AceBi cis. He will never realize hes being flirted with at any point in time.

Now thats done, some more stuff about just some general relationships people have with each other. Olimar and Louie when Louie first joined HF were pretty neutral about each other even after 4 but after 2 and deeply apologizing for leaving him behind scared, Louie and Olimar got much friendlier with each other. They started carpooling and even spending some time outside of work together. While Terry thinks Louie is cool if a bit strange sometimes, Lebe is rather more skeptical and scared of him. Penelope worries he might be a bad influence but can't help but worry about Louie as much as Olimar does when Oli vents to her about Louie.

Alph and Brittany are best friends but their relationship isnt the most balanced at times. Brittany is quite quick to getting emotional and blaming others for things. Alph tries not to hold it against her too much given hes aware of her issues and why she is like that in the first place but it can rub off on his timid nature. Though he admired Charlie all through 3, Brittany's negative comments eventually changed Alph's perception on Charlie to just being someone he works with.

Now some of my own world building brain rot wo! a time system, joy. I was just thinking about how do people keep time between every other planet so i propose: Galactic time. Galactic time is not based off anything but purely numbers. 1 "day" is 20 hours long and there is no PM or AM. Its based of a single founding clock that all the other galactic clocks follow now and is usually exclusively used for interstellar work and jobs or meeting up on different planets. The galactic months are all 25 days long with only 10 of them. a galactic week is 5 days long and though i don't have names at the moment the months and days also have different names as not to get confused with any planet names or calendars they might have.

thank you if you've read my ramblings this far. have louie drinking paint

[somethingsomethingdgronpa]

guess I’ll introduce myself to everyone

hi. I’m a girl that may be anywhere and everywhere at almost all times. I usually visit tags for computer games, from the innocent world of Slime Rancher to the opposite when it comes to Danganronpa. Some things about me are:

-I’m usually called shine when it comes to being online, but a few times, I was called glow and shin (the whole reason why I’m called these things is because they’re part of my Roblox username.)

-the dumbest thing I’ve ever googled was “what does purple taste like?” because I was curious about what people with synesthesia feel like.

-I’m not leaving the Danganronpa fandom anytime soon.

-I’ve already mentioned this, but I’ll show up anywhere and everywhere with replies. Start running.

-I am an animal lover but I still eat meat.

(NEW INFO)

-I mainly go by she/her pronouns. I don’t feel too comfortable revealing my age, but note that (as I said before) I am a minor.

-My first name was actually revealed in one of the posts I’ve made. Try to find it, I dare you.

-I’m still not too sure about my sexual orientation, but I think it may be something among the lines of aroace (with a soft spot for guys. Sometimes.)

-I have anxiety and I was often made fun of for some reason. Please be gentle.

-that anxiety most likely is the reason why in every (fictional) situation, I think about the worst cases, most of them involving a certain maniac.

-allergy season also concerns me.

-any contribution to the Danganronpa rp group that is constantly growing will be tagged as #rp stuff. Yes, even for those only with hmaper. I’ll also be roleplaying as the creature in my profile picture, but it’s around the size of a large dog instead of being humongous. (If hamsters and a cat thing are allowed, then why not another cat thing?)

-You guys can interact with me anytime! I don’t bite! (Please talk to me I sometimes get lonely)

(note, if you’re wondering where the “Random Randys” post went, it’s on @accountfordogcodes (my computer account)

(ROLEPLAY INFORMATION UNDER CUT)

Shine (yes, she’s also called Shine) is a miniature fellisio (see Creatures of Sonaria wiki) who just wants things to not be chaotic. She tries to act like a normal human being, but sometimes she acts just like a cat if her instincts take over.

She likes the ocean, anything she deems as “fun,” and trying her best to care for others. She hates when people are just rude to her, and she is also terrified of the simplest things becoming much more chaotic and hard to deal with.

She doesn’t remember how she got here, but she knew she came from another world. She’s getting used to this place, though, and she might be able to share stories of what her life was in the past.

(Also she’s apparently a mom now. Her adopted son is a Sprigatito named Fern.)

Speaking: Normal text

Actions: (Text in parentheses)

Mental statement: (Italicized text in parentheses)

Status alert: (Bold text in parentheses)

[happylittleneighborhood]

🌈hiya !! i’m billy/manny !🌈

🌈this is my puppet nonhuman/agere blog !!

🌈here i’m gonna talk about being a puppet, my memories, alterhuman stuffs, being a syskid and look for other puppets too !! i also reblog a lot of agere stuffs !!

🌈i’m a puppet in a few different ways (as and alter and also in an alterhuman way), but this blog is specifically for where i’m a hand and rod puppet from an educational children’s show !! it doesn’t exist here at all, but that’s okay ! :] (i use otherkin terms and tags for it but i think of it more as just nonhuman since being an alter it’s kinda confusing !! but i dunno !!)

🌈my main blog is @rainbowbilly​ !! i don’t really post on there much, but you can follow it if you want !

🌈please interact if you’re any kind of puppet !! alterhuman (otherkin, fictionkin, nonhuman, etc), introject/fictive, or just a general puppet etc !! whatever type, whatever way !! (but i’m especially looking for other children’s show puppets !!)

🌈i’m usually more active in general on my personal website, but i don’t post about alterhuman stuffs there ! (at least not much !) 

🌈this blog is sfw (obviously !) and safe for age regressors or other syskids too !! i’ll probably post some edutainment stuff !! :D i reblog/post agere stuff too, what can you expect !! i’m a syskid and a puppet from a children’s show ! it’s what i do !! but please don’t get scared away if you’re not an agere blog !! don’t be afraid to say hi !!

-

🌈there’s more info about me under the “keep reading” part !! i wanted to keep this part short so it doesn’t take up much !! :] my dni is there too, please give that a read !!

🌈 info about my memories ! 🌈

🌈a guide to my tags !🌈

🌈need me to tag some stuffs i post/reblog (a topic, media, etc) for you ? feel free to ask !! :]

🌈basic stuffs about me !!🌈

🌈you wanna learn about little old me ?? golly !! well, let's get things started !!

🌈names i go by !!: billy, manny, toony/toonie, most source names are also fine but maybe ask first if i didn't list in here !! :]

🌈they/them only please !! :]

🌈as an alter i'm 8-12 years old !! :] our body is 16, though !!

🌈in general, i consider myself a human/puppet !! mostly a puppet, though ! like a 2:8 ratio !! :]

🌈i'm a system host, syskid and a splitroject !! (that means i'm an introject with more than one source !!) ( my source list is here !) if you’re a sourcemate, feel free to say hi !! our system is autistic and physically disabled :] we also have some other stuffs but we like to keep most stuffs private !! 🌈(we think we’re mid support needs but we dunno because the people that help us are really in denial about us needing much help because of our parents denying it and also our school is just bad towards disabled people and we don’t wanna use a wrong label if we’re not so if anyone who’s mid support needs can talk to us about it that’d be really really helpful thanks !!! :])

🌈i might talk about our psychosis a little, probably not, but if i do it’ll always be tagged so you don’t have to see it if you have it blocked !

🌈i'm nonbinary, aroace and greyaethsetic !!

🌈i think 'cringe culture' is dumb !! you should get to have fun and like things that people think are 'cringe-worthy' and talk and act how you want !! as long as you don't support anything bad you should just be allowed to have fun !!

🌈i talk silly and funny !! i like being expressive and energetic !!! and the way i talk changes sometimes !! just ignore it i'm just having fun !! :]

🌈i have some f/os, but i mostly have fictional bffs !! :D

🌈special interests !!: my main source (rainbow billy: the curse of the leviathan), puppets, stitch head, rubberhose cartoons, rainbows, mlp, vintage dolls, raggedy ann and andy, clowns, monsters, lucid dreams and dreaming and cosmonious high !!

🌈please don't interact: 

-if you see me in any of my sources in a sexual or romantic way 

-basic stuffs like if you're homophobic or transphobic or racist etc but i mean, come on, why would you guys WANNA interact with me ? haha !!

-if you post gore or really scary thingys on your blog without any warnings at all...(don't do that !!)

-if you judge people's triggers for being "weird"

-you post nsfw, untagged gore or untagged discourse/politics (i know discourse/politics sounds silly next to the other two, but it’s the main thing that makes me hate social media so much !! so much fighting...i like to not see it, thanks !! :])

-you’re pr0ship/pr0fic/c0mship/ant!-anti (or any other terms). i don’t harass anyone but i don’t feel comfy interacting with you guys, sorry !!

-if you’re r4dqueer/tr4ns-id/tr4ns-x (you guys really really scare me please go away :[)

-if you’re anti non-sexual/sfw age regression (kinda obvious, but just in case !) or anti objectum/posic

[appreciatingtokrev]

hi! sorry for disappearing, i was feeling a bit down and then i 🫠 for a little while after that. yes, nfsw is a massive no but like you said there are other topics that shouldn't be discuss about. it actually is but a person will either get upset or find it rude, depending on their mindset but i suppose it's both like a double edged sword. those relationships def are treated as inferior but the friendships that turn into relationships are probably criticise most esp if the parties been friends for years but you can't force feelings to come out at an acceptable time if it ever happens 🤷‍♀️ that's true, a relationship need to be stable before progressing more.

it is a bit unfair esp if the newer users become massive fans, there are playthroughs on youtube but from what i've seen, it is a bit jumbled up and all over the place. i'm assuming you must have a lot of weapons then? oh i see, are they both mobile based? fans want a nintendo switch port for GI. it is a bit of a random topic lol. that's true and it would be super hard too, the spellings for my mum and her siblings overlaps a lot, they have double e in all their names. it's been a cool topic to talk about but it's finished now 🤣 that sound like an awkward situation to be in, i hope your teachers never thought that for like signed permissions slips for school's trips 😭 did you guys ever have problem with telling which one is your mail/posted package considering the initials thing. ah my dad and my names spelling are very similar (we have the same letters expect for one that isn't in mine) along with the initials so someone accidentally gave my option of voting to my dad because they skimmed through our names 😂 i did asked my dad if this was planned regarding our names and he said no.

also, i saw a short animated of koko accidentally confessing to inupi and it made me wonder what happened to inupi in the bonten timeline and his relationship with koko.

oh don’t worry, i’m glad that you’re back & feeling better again! <3

yup, agreed

yep. my ex & i tried to love each other romantically and force the feelings, aaand it did not work out lol. in hindsight i’m amazed we managed to go 8 months lmao. funny story too bc we’re both aroace now so it was double stupid. we also didn’t talk at all for 2 years (bc i had them blocked afhjfhg) but we started talking again last week and it’s going great now that we’ve both grown and realised that we’re way better off as friends so i’m not too upset abt our past mistakes anymore lol. anyway, lesson learnt, forcing relationships or love does NOT work out, no matter how desperately you want it to. also agreed, relationships definitely need to be stable to move on bc if they’re not it just keeps getting harder to somehow make them stable (again).

yeah, true. i mean yes.. to be fair i’ve been playing for a really long time and for most of that i’ve been playing it daily so,, hoyoverse (i think i called the company mihoyo in my last reply? they used to be called mihoyo but changed their name to hoyoverse idk a year or so ago but i keep forgetting adhjf) now releases all of their games for both mobile & pc, and i think gi, hi3rd, and hsr are for ps4 & ps5 too? honestly not sure, i play them all on pc. ah yes, the switch port... i used to be kinda excited for it but i’ve lost hope for getting one soon (if ever) bc we were promised one two and a half years ago and nothing’s been done ever since 💀

funny thing my dad is a teacher at my school so he knows some of my teachers a bit & even is friends with one lol so i never really had any problems with our signatures after explaining why they’re so similar. idk abt other places but on the post here there’s always your full name so we never had problems with that. tho i’ve had a bunch of other teachers from my school text me on teams thinking they were texting my father bc our usernames on there (bc school) are almost the same afhjgfjshd

ah lol, that seems annoying

oh i think i know which animation that was bc i think i’ve seen it too! i personally hc that they went no contact or at least barely have any contact even if they’re both not really happy with that (especially koko) but they think it’s for the best. i just think inupi wouldn’t want any associations with criminals and koko wouldn’t want inupi to have associations with criminals bc of him either, so... tho that’s pretty sad afhjggfh but imo the most realistic version of them in bonten

[randomshenaniganery]

What if I rewrite the winx club out of spite from the later seasons and heteronormativity?

legit tho let me rant about how much i hate the timmy and tecna ship 

Firstly, pairing up every single girl with another guy is very ew.

Second, pairing the nerd with another nerd basic it feels super lazy and really forced like even in season one its so weird I just never shipped them because there is no chemistry their conversations is literally oh i dont like dancing much oh yeah me too not into it cool cool. Like they sound like ok acquaintances at best in actuality they’re just awkward introverts stuck in the same couch and felt like they should talk to each other. 

third, tecna has not shown any interest in s1 like the most they’ve done is her saying hi to Timmy, and the girls going OOOOoooooOOOOOOo look techna its Timmy. Now, I’m aroace and let me tell you how fucking annoying it was to grow up and girls would INSIST you have a crush and they will NOT leave you alone. THIS feels like that, nothing in Tecna’s actions show that she’s romantically interested and since this is a cartoon where any kind of special interaction is enhanced by close ups and long staring she didn’t have any of that in s1 it came out of fucking nowhere in s2 and hit me in the fucking face.

fourth, I hate the way tecna is in s2 the way she acts towards Timmy in the early episodes is so fucking weird. She’s projecting this romanticized version of Timmy in this weird VR headset and Timmy is just like oh hey tehna wanna hear about literally the only thing we talk about it because neither of us seem to have any kind of other interest? Then later in the episode where the Trix break into the school she gets mad at Timmy for not standing up to the Trix and its like BITCH??? YOU couldn’t defeat them what makes you think HE CAN???? Like do you want him to DIE. YA KNOW LIKE SKYE??? HE LEGIT JUST SAW SKYE DIE HE’S NOT GONNA STAND UP TO THEM WITH HIS TINY ASS LASER GUN.

She just suddenly loses her critical thinking skills and starts projecting this romance on Timmy.

Fifth, Timmy also seems very chill about Tecna they really felt like friends in s1 just vibing talking about interests that no one else in their friend group shared

lastly, there’s that stupid episode where Tecna goes why do u only talk to me about technology. BITCH WHATE ELSE DO U LIKE HMM???? The show never bothered to establish anything outside of tech and logic for you at that point. 

My solution:

we’re going to recycle that tecna projecting weird shit into Timmy because I think that this can become an important lesson to other people to not romanticize your crush. Don’t attach random traits to real people and get mad that they don’t act like the way you’ve envisioned them. 

I’ll make them date for like three weeks before they realize that they were more comfortable as friends break up and become really close sharing interests and being supportive without the pretense of forced romance. You get the message of not every person of the opposite sex is a potential partner and the second message that you can break up with someone cordially and still be friends it’s not impossible.

Also maybe give tecna an interest outside of technology for example if she’s into logic maybe she likes mysteries and thrillers because using logic to find out the killer and solve problems sounds like something she could do and it would be useful for plot related stuff.

[venomous-system]

HERE COMES THE WEIRDEST INTRO POST YET

Alright. I sort of have a source and sort of don’t. If anyone knows a term that covers what I’m about to say, please let me know. I keep bouncing between Introject and Entomate.

My name is Anthon (he/him), and I am Jax’s brother.

Jax posts a lot. He’s a Genshin fictive and his source is Tartaglia. Anyone up to date on Genshin lore can probably figure out where this is going.

I have no idea what to even refer to my alter origin as, let alone whether I can be “sourced” or not… I showed up from his feelings of loneliness and missing his family, and everything about my age, appearance, and personality formed in accordance to his exomemories. My “source,” the canon Anthon in the game, is only ever mentioned and never shown or really talked about in detail. Can I actually consider him a source if the only thing I got from him is my name?

I can’t fully act like an Entomate, since I remember Teyvat, Snezhnaya, Teucer, and the rest of my family very vividly… it’s such a strange grey area to exist in, which is why I don’t normally talk to people or expose my existence in any sort of detail, despite being a cohost and one of the most active in the system.

Here’s a list of things that are not and likely will never be canon but describe me anyway:

Cryo Vision

Around 3.5 years younger than Jax/Tartaglia (Jax ageslides though, which is how I’m currently 18 while he’s 19)

Brown hair - only sibling who didn’t inherit the ginger

Grey-blue eyes

Shortest sibling

Born during winter

Most (visibly) emo sibling

Can sorta cook? Last time I tried I set a paper plate on a hot stove and nearly started a fire, but the food turned out good

Aroace

Not physically adept. At all. I can’t fight. I absolutely suck at hand-to-hand combat and never learned to use any weapons. If I have a bow, I can aim well, but it takes way too long to set up my shots, so I’m just a sniper with no talent for speed shooting. If I need to fight, I can probably use a catalyst? But I’m really just a healer

Mom friend but stupid

I hated the Fatui for keeping my brother busy with work all the time and I would prank/harass them a lot whenever I saw the grunts just wandering around town. I was arrested once for kicking one of them in the balls, but I wasn’t held long since I was just a kid at the time

I’m mildly afraid of wolves but have befriended a brown bear after it tried to adopt my younger brother (long story)

I love Dungeons and Dragons. Best thing I’ve found since being in the system. I want to learn to be a DM

I can grow crops and build traps

Rural Snezhnayans are like the hillbillies of Teyvat, so I used to do gay stuff in public just to piss people off

Despite being Aroace, I really like the song Dirty Thoughts by Chloe Adams

I hate rain. So much. It’s like the gods are pissing on you

I am 14 months younger than Tonia and 4 years older than Teucer

Tonia is actually the scariest sibling. I once saw her break every finger on a guy’s hand because he touched her waist without consent. He deserved it, but it was pretty frightening to witness

I’m the clumsiest and I get hurt pretty often because of it. I fronted at a trampoline park once and I fell down more often than I landed on my feet. Teucer is clumsy too, but it’s because he’s so energetic and he almost never gets hurt. He just jumps back up and keeps going. I, on the other hand, am incredibly uncoordinated and bruise easily

I can’t think of anything else. That’s my intro! If anyone knows the word for an introject who formed based off exomemories with almost nothing confirmed about their source, let me know. I’d appreciate it

Bye

- Anthon 🎲

Edit: NC Fictive

[envythepalmtree]

fic recs: Identity

Happy 450 followers to me! Since I didn't do anything for 400, have my favorite fics that deal with identity in some way.

Most are about race and culture, and all are ownvoices in some way. (Ownvoices = stories written by someone from an underrepresented group about being in that group, rather than being written from someone outside that group) I'm using the term loosely, since countries like Ishval and Xerxes don't have strict real-world counterparts. But things like being in a diaspora and missing culture and assimilation still apply.

no matter the hearts you burn, in mine you shall always remain by @firewoodfigs

Words: 9839

Chapters: 2/3

I ADORED this fic!! Xingese Roy by a chinese diaspora author my beloved. It starts out with his mother, Yao Xuan (whose name is a pun!! I love chinese name puns!!) and her life as a concubine, having an affair, running away. She and Roy's father don't survive and Roy grows up in Amestris. Then it skips to when they're older in Ishval, then to post Promised Day visiting Xing with Riza.

Yao Xuan's backstory was so sad and beautifully done. I love Chinese royal court stuff, it's so messed up and interesting. I love Eri's writing style, it's incredibly poetic. And she intersperses an actual poem, too! Go read it, it's amazing.

ticket stubs and your diaries by @nerdywriiterchild

Words: 397

Chapters: 1/1

This fic gave me chills. It's Al-centric and has him grieving for Xerxes, and how he'll never know his culture. Family he'll never know, experiences he'll never have. Gone. There's a line about missing something he'll never know that just,,, *cries*

I think it's something that a lot of diaspora kids deal with, although not on the same scale. The loss and grieve of being disconnected from your culture. I resonated with that.

we can only do our best to recreate by @nerdywriiterchild

Words: 803

Chapters: 1/1

The happy sequel to ticket stubs!! It's about ed and al and winry and mei raising their kids to be connected to their cultures. Xerxesian, Drachman, Xingese. About Ed struggling a little with Xerxes because of the father who connects him to it.

When Ed says "we're not Xerxesian, not like he was,,,," GOD I felt that. Not feeling [ethnicity] enough. Don't we all?

Also, "general bendan" made me giggle.

Ta'burni by @ta1k-less

Words: 25785

Chapters: 4/4

I was skeptical about Ishval AUs at first, but this fic was amazingly done and changed my mind. Meg fleshed out Ishvalan culture beautifully and I know a lot of it draws on her own.

I loved the storytelling. The way the voice clearly sounded like a child, but handled nuanced and heavy things. Read the trigger warnings - parts of the genocide are described in detail but she writes in the author's notes where to skip them if you need to.

You're Not Alone (In Fact There Are Many Like You) by @elricsyao

Words: 5125

Chapters: 2/?

Aromatic Edward! I love Sarah's aroace Ed posts and this fic was beautifully done. It starts when Ed is very young, before Trisha dies. There's a scene with Trisha that shows how even loving parents can teach their kids the wrong things. Then after the transmutation, Winry kisses him and he wonders why he didn't feel anything. Then to when he's a soldier, working under Mustang.

The storytelling and tone is very emotional and I think her tag "I take Ed's angst and multiply it by 1000" sums that up, haha!

I really hope you guys check out these fics!! They're all amazing and it's always great to show a little love to ownvoices writers. And feel free to send me your own recs or your own work, I love identity stuff.

[variousqueerthings]

Tom Hardy Movies rated least to most queer

I made a list of some Tom Hardy movies and I rated them based on my own, non-specific criteria about what makes a movie queer. Results below the cut.

(Some films not included, because I haven’t watched them yet, because Mr Hardy’s only in them for a few minutes, because the subject matter doesn’t lend itself to this list, or because I just don’t want’em here. TV series also not included. The list is organised into both groups and ratings, because I’m doing The Most.)

Movies are divided into four groups and rated from 0 – 10 on the Queer-Scale, scroll down to the bottom if you want the ratings without the commentary.

Disclaimer: This list is subjective. Don’t come at me because I didn’t rate Inception higher, Nolan himself is as queer as cargo shorts. 

1. This movie would make more sense if it were queer

If this movie were queer it… might not become a perfect film all of a sudden, but it’d make a hell of a lot more sense than what’s actually going on. With an occasional dose of “are the cis-straights okay?”

This Means War (2012): So Chris Pine and Tom Hardy are ostensibly both in love with Reese Witherspoon, but say “I love you” to each other pretty much constantly throughout the movie and their friendship is often presented as a domestic partnership. Cool, cool, cooool.

Queer Rating: 2 out of 10. This movie hate-crimed me by having Tom Hardy literally spell out his relationship with Chris Pine, only for the script to then have him say… “can you imagine all that… but with a woman…” Later on the movie explicitly denies polyamory is possible. Fuck this film.

The Dark Knight Rises (2012): Batman movies should always be queer. Mr. Hardy’s the only one who acceptably camps it up, despite Nolan’s best attempts to make him “acceptably gruff.” No matter what you do, Bane is a massive daddy in a mask and thanks to Mr Hardy’s honestly iconic fucking speech pattern in this film, it goes from pretty atrociously straight to just queer enough to imagine a future where Robert Pattinson plays batman and maybe adopts a bunch of kids.

(the only truly decent mask in this franchise tbh)

Queer Rating: 3 out of 10. Mr Hardy’s back is the one that’s actually broken carrying any semblance of fun in this overly long movie all on his own.

Lawless (2012): Wow, this really was the year of the not-queer-enough, wasn’t it? Look, it’s “based on a real story,” but it’s also a movie and movies don’t need to stick to the truth, and this one certainly doesn’t. Was the guy queer in real life? I don’t know. But that doesn’t matter, what matters is that it’s just kind of an eh movie and maybe being queer would add something to it. One of those “but why make someone queer? because it’s always more interesting to do so,” movies.

Queer Rating: 3 out of 10. It’s just not queer. But Tom Hardy wears cardigans and described his character as a “mother figure,” which adds an interesting dynamic to him.

2. Actually Queer but in a homophobic way

Tom Hardy plays a canonically queer character, yaaay. The whole movie contains a strange sense of the director being too not-queer to actually engage with that and everything around him is almost aggressively straight, noooo.

RocknRolla (2008): Honestly this movie has the funniest coming out scene ever + that familiar undertone of “all these manly men secretly want to fuck each other” is only heightened by one of them actually being gay and in love with his best friend. It’s such a fucking… it’s such a movie. Personally I find Mark Strong, Idris Elba, Thandie Newton, and, of course, Tom Hardy to be really hot in it, so that’s a plus. There’s a scene in which Strong’s character teaches another gangster how to do a proper backhand. It’s really gay of him. Also slow-dancing at a gay club. Butler’s character needs to get himself together, you really don’t think 2008 Tom Hardy is hot? Mate.

(left to right: functional queer, disaster queer, distinguished queer)

Queer Rating: 6 out of 10, for having an actual gay character who is played by Tom Hardy doing a sexy phonecall voice to another guy, but then there’s that feeling you can’t shake that the whole movie is vaguely uncomfortable about it, like a family member awkwardly patting you on the shoulder after they found out you were queer second-hand, but they’ve still got 50 years of bias to unlearn. Also Thandie Newton is killed, fuck that noise. 

Legend (2015): If I had a nickle for the amount of times Tom Hardy’s played a gay gangster, I’d have two nickles. Which isn’t a lot, but weird that it happened twice (looks at Peaky Blinders and thinks it ought to be three times). I’ve watched Legend three times and every time it just… loses me. And because this is a biased list, I’ll only specifically mention that it fails to make Ron’s queerness anything but a way for him to shock others. Gangsters could be gay? Gasp! On the upside Tom Hardy has so much sexual tension with everyone in this movie, including himself (why would you do that? Asks Ron, bemused. Because I can’t kill you, no matter how much I fucking want to, hisses a blood-soaked Reggie right into his ear. It’s hot).

Queer rating: 5 out of 10 because the film is just not very queer for a movie with several queer men in it.

3. Straight as a forced family dinner

It’s straight.

Locke (2013): He’s a married man who had an affair and trying to deal with the fallout of it. This isn’t a spoiler for most of the movie, it’s a pretty neat movie where we look at Tom Hardy having a bit of a mental breakdown and taking lots of phonecalls (my personal hell). Is it queer? Not in the slightest.

Queer Rating: 2 out of 10 for Hardy’s face being in almost every shot.

The Revenant (2015): Yeah, yeah, DeCaprio’s and Hardy’s characters are obsessed with each other, yeah it’s a man’s world where the only women are dead wife, kidnapped sexually assaulted native princess, or background whore, yeah, they fight each other and there’s a ton of grunting, but also… I just fucking don’t like this movie. The thin line where a storyline like this one becomes queer might be crossed for others, but not for me. Fuck these guys and their stupid  bear fights.

Queer rating: 3 out of 10 for it being about dirty men in the middle of nowhere (but you could just watch Brokeback Mountain or The Lighthouse or God’s Own Country or any Mad Max, or, or, or…)

4. Queer? Queer. Queer? … Queer…

The plots, aesthetics and/or characters played by Tom Hardy lend themselves to a queer reading, even if there is no overt intention towards queerness. Often this is because of a deliberate lack of heterosexual and/or cisgender writing, which in this day and age is still pretty uncommon not to include within a plot.

Inception (2010): Okay, I don’t even need to write about the added “darling,” or the “go to sleep Mr Eames.” I don’t need to go on about the absolutely bonkers amount of fanfiction written for Eames and Arthur, based on a few minutes of film and a boatload of chemistry. It’s queer.

Queer Rating: 7 out of 10, because the actual plot of the film isn’t very queer, but between the Arthur/Eames dynamic and Elliot Page, Nolan was really given a gift he didn’t deserve.

Warrior (2011): Okay, so first off, this might be my favourite Tom Hardy film, at least some part of my brain is fixated on it at almost all times and I’m considering watching it for the third time in two weeks. I don’t only consider it queer based on Mr. Hardy’s character, although he has no romantic or sexual interest and could be read as aroace, but because of the themes, especially those surrounding said character, who is coded as a caregiver to women and through close emotional connections to men. It’s got possibly unintentional deconstructions of masculinity and two men (brothers) who need to forgive each other and can only do so through the catharsis of violence. It speaks to me as a transmasc with several cis brothers, struggling with my own masculinity. It’s not at all written for me, but I find myself all over it. I could talk about this movie forever.

Queer Rating: 8 out of 10. I’m not allowed to say any more or I’ll never stop writing about it. I love you Tommy…

The Drop (2014): Bob’s lack of sexual and/or romantic interest in Naomi is so strange to her that she doesn’t know what he would want from her otherwise. Bob really just wants to raise a dog with her (and also forgiveness for past sins). Bob is such a rare ace and possibly aro coded character, it really throws me every time I watch this film how obvious it is. Bonus points for also being autistic-coded and not in the stereotypical ways.

(Tom Hardy’s most challenging role: pretending he doesn’t know dogs)

Queer Rating: 9 out of 10 because it’s so fucking rare to see ace and aro coded characters that aren’t, you know…. serial killers. Also Tom Hardy adopts a puppy and has a very cute, kinda lispy voice. How often does Tom Hardy play softer men like this?

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015): Very deliberately no sexual or romantic writing included in Max’s and Furiosa’s relationship. Sure, there’s not a lot of time for that in the post-apocalyptic wasteland, but it was also done with a purpose! “It was always going to be two warriors on par, starting off with very little respect for each other and ending up with a massive respect for each other.” - Charlize Theron. “So of course they meet, of course there’s a relationship, an unspoken understanding. A recognition.” - Tom Hardy.

Queer Rating: 9 out of 10. It’s not just the characters, but the world and it’s apocalyptic BDSM leather scene, the questions it asks about sustainability and about people as tools, and the found family. It’s about overcoming violence through multiple kinds of love. And it’s about watching a guy playing flame-thrower guitar. What could be queerer?

Venom (2018): Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same… No, but Eddie is queer. The only question is whether the sequel will acknowledge that aspect or not, but even if not. Even if it manages to straightly bypass the reality of a symbiotic relationship with a genderless? genderfluid? being from another world that is linked to you down to your very cells and understands you more intimately than any other person possibly could… even if all that: Eddie is queer. Venom and Eddie are in a relationship. Any relationship Eddie ever enters into will automatically become a thrupple. He makes out with Venom in the movie! Eddie is queer.

(aw yeah that tongue is going down his throat)

Queer Rating: 9.5 out of 10, because it’s still coded by the creators in the language of bromance (hey, bro, is it gay if we’re physically and emotionally closer than any other people on earth?), but the movie is so, so camp and Mr Hardy’s acting choices are beautiful – the screaming? The lispy soft voice and lack of taking up space? The lobster tank? The only people who don’t know how queer this is are the people making it apparently. Fingers crossed for that sequel!

Hon. mentions:

Star Trek: Nemesis (2002): Star Trek – even at it’s worst (especially at its worst?) – is camp af + Hardy is a straight-up baby in this film.

Bronson (2008): It’s about a real person who’s still alive, so I won’t comment on the actual man. However the film seems to code the character Bronson along an ace line and also has genderqueering Vaudeville. Someone let Tom Hardy do more of whatever was going on in those stage-bits.

(this right here: this the good shit)

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (2011): Another ensemble piece not massively about Hardy’s character, but it’s a movie that centers around queerness in a strange, depressing way. Tom Hardy’s character isn’t queer. Colin Firth and Mark Strong are though. The book makes me cry.

Peaky Blinders (2013-): Because it’s a TV series I left it out. There’s a lot of straight nonsense going on there, but Alfie Solomens is gay. There’s nothing in the series that disputes that and plenty that lends itself to the reading.

Dunkirk (2017): Tom Hardy plays an RAF pilot in a deep emotional connection with the other main RAF pilot. That’s immediately gay. However he’s not in the movie much because of the way it’s constructed, so I left it off.

Queer Ratings (least to most)

No queer to be found here traveller:

This Means War: 2 out of 10 - illegal movie, Tom Hardy swore he wouldn’t do another rom-com after

Locke: 2 out of 10 - straight Welshman and his straight problems. He pretty though

Lawless: 3 out of 10 - cardigan-Hardy being a mother-hen, but very straight for all that

The Dark Knight Rises: 3 out of 10 - a superhero movie that doesn’t deserve Mr Hardy’s camp talents (unlike Venom)

The Revenant: 3 out of 10 - doesn’t give me what I want out of a movie full of dirty, bearded men

Queer but we deserve more:

Legend: 5 out of 10 - timid homosexuality, considering the source material. 

RocknRolla: 6 out of 10 - hey bro, is it gay if we kill the only female lead in our massive ensemble cast

The queerest of Hardy’s:

Inception: 7 out of 10 - Elliot Page and JGL kissing was an all-around terrible choice that made no sense, we know the truth, Nolan

Warrior: 8 out of 10 - I’m still crying, Edgerton’s crying, Hardy’s crying, we’re all crying, and I think that’s really emotionally healthy and queer of us

Mad Max: Fury Road: 9 out of 10 - non-romantic love in the time of BDSM post-apocalyptic wastelands is something that can actually be so personal

The Drop: 9 out of 10 - “Fucking punk. Go out to dinner dressed like you're still in you living room! You wear those big hippity-hoppity clown shoes! You speak to women terribly! You treat them despicably! You hurt harmless dogs that can't defend themselves! I'm tired of you man. I'm tired of you. You embarrass me!”

Venom: 9.5 out of 10 - Sometimes a relationship is an anxious reporter, the sentient goo inhabiting his body, his kinda-ex-girlfriend and her new doctor boyfriend, and I think that’s beautiful

[gossip-girl-of-middleearth]

Imagine the Fellowship comforting you, as you reveal your Aro/Ace identity to them

Requested by: @a-dragon-under-the-stars

I was wondering if you could write a gen or maybe qpp (x reader) oneshot where the reader is aroace and they're feeling unaccepted. The fellowship helps the reader then?

AN: I researched the topic, to ensure I got it right, and started relating a little too much, and now I’m questioning my identity. Alas! Enjoy the product of head scratching, and muttering ‘is it an emotional attachment thing, or is this me too??’

‘Either come back with a husband, or don’t come back at all’ – the last thing your mother had said to you, before you’d set out on the Fellowship’s journey.

Though you resented the idea greatly, you knew better than to argue with your mother. Of course, this left you at wrath with yourself. Here you were, travelling with those you’d rather call friends, but were instead sorting through them – as potential suitors, no less!

There were many feasible candidates, and at least two royals in your company. Your mother had placed great emphasis on that particular fact, but you knew she’d be happy either way, so long as you returned home with a lifelong partner.

However, as mentioned before, you found yourself rather at war, with no one but your own mind – and heart.

You see, that was just the thing – your heart cared not for what your mind thought. It had no attraction to any of the males in your presence, and for the life of you, you couldn’t figure out why!

They were all so handsome, and single! Even the ranger, Aragorn, no longer had ties to that Elven lady from Rivendell.

Legolas, the prince, was high on your radar. He had flowing blonde locks, a tall frame and a charming smile. Your mother would be very proud, if you returned home with him linked through your arm.

Of course, then there were the two human men. Boromir and Aragorn were both very similar in heart and spirit, and you knew for sure they’d make wonderful husbands.

Gimli the Dwarf made you chuckle, but you knew he had great social standing, within his own culture.

The Hobbits were last on your list, but they were most agreeable, nonetheless. Frodo, Merry and Pippin, the three cousins, allegedly stood very high in their society, back in the Shire.

Gandalf also travelled with you, but you halted your thoughts, before anything else could be birthed within your mind.

So many great males you travelled with, and yet, you had no hope of romancing them – it simply wasn’t in you to accomplish.

You felt at unease for days, and the Fellowship soon noticed. Your stomach churned and churned, as you wondered how your mother would react, to you returning home without one of them. The other half of you, was restless over the idea of actually returning home with one of them. You would be miserable, forcing both your heart and body to do things it had no interest in.

You felt incomplete, in a way, as if when your soul was crafted, such finite details were neglected. How would you ever honour your family tree, if you couldn’t carry on the ancestral legacy?

It was one big mess – one your newly found friends wished to help you with.

You sat around the campfire, with your head in your hands. The males all glanced between one another, as they revered you in concern.

You thought you had been discreet in your troubled antics, but apparently, at the gentle calling of Aragorn’s voice, you had not been.

“Y/n?” Aragorn called, stoking the fire, as he glanced at you sideways. “Are you okay? Is everything alright?”

Aware that tears were in your eyes, and had been running down your cheeks, you lifted your head. You sniffled loudly, shocking both yourself, and your friends.

“I’m fine,” you lied, wiping at your nose. “Thank you for asking.”

“Clearly not,” Legolas huffed, creasing his brows at you. “It doesn’t take Elven eyes to observe your saddened state.”

“Aye, we are your friends,” Gimli promised, slurping at his stew. “If you can’t tell us, then who can you tell?”

You lifted your head more, and knitted your own brows at the group. They gave you their undivided attention, and some even shuffled in their seats, as to better pay attention to you.

Their endearment warmed your heart, and you couldn’t help but feel it swell three times bigger in response. You even offered your own smile, as their sincerity was just too lovely.

Sighing, you averted your eyes to the ground, and replied. Your voice was small, and barely above a mumble. However, they had all heard you.

“I don’t want to marry any of you,” you said sheepishly.

Silence ensued around the camp, as the boys all looked between one another. Who among them had desired to court you, so much so that they had asked for your hand in marriage? Worse yet, why would you taunt them so cruelly, as to announce said rejection in everyone’s presence?

“Did…one of us…ask you, for your hand?” Boromir slowly said, glancing at the Hobbits and Legolas – whom he assumed were the most viable candidates.

You cringed deeply, for you quickly realized that you’d have to reveal your mother’s ulterior motives.

“Not exactly,” you winced. “I don’t know how to say this, without coming across as scheming, but…my mother…she told me to marry one of you.”

Silence ensued again, and you kept your eyes on the ground. That is, until Pippin chirped aloud.

“I’ll marry you!” he offered, grinning brightly. “Our children would be rather tall, that way!”

“That’s just the thing,” you huffed, rolling your eyes – amused nonetheless. “I don’t think I want any of that.”

“How so?” Aragorn gently asked, looking at you fully, as he continued meddling with the fire.

“Well,” you swallowed your nerves, “I know what tags along with marriage, and relationships, and I don’t know if there’s something wrong with me, but…I don’t feel inclined towards any of it? I don’t know, I’m just not interested? It’s hard to explain, but forcing those kind of things feels wrong somehow…am I just crazy?”

“Absolutely not,” Frodo promised – smiling, and nodding once in your direction. “I know so, because I’m the exact same.”

“What?” you incredulously asked, gaping across at the Hobbit.

“I feel the same as you,” he repeated. “I too do not have any interest in romance, or the things that ensue afterwards…nor did my uncle, for that matter.”

The Hobbit blushed at his own innuendo, regarding what ensures after marriage. He looked away, with a clearing of his throat.

Legolas’ brows were raised, and he pursed his lips to the side. ‘Can’t relate’, the young Elf thought. Boromir and Aragorn merely only nodded in understanding, as they mulled over both yours and the Hobbit’s admittance.

“I too, will jump on this bandwagon,” Gandalf piped up, having been sat and smoking against a tree the whole time. “It might be because I am a Maia, but even in my Middle-earth form, I do not crave such relations. If you’re crazy, or incomplete, then so am I – and I was made in Eru’s image.”

You suddenly perked up at the wizard’s words, and offered him an eye-squinting smile.

“Doesn’t seem that weird to me,” Gimli mused, shrugging his shoulders. “I know a few Dwarves who felt the same – Thorin, for one. At least, that’s what my father says.”

“It seems the rest of us are in the minority,” Aragorn smiled, glancing between the other Hobbits, Legolas and Boromir. “I wouldn’t fret at all, Y/n. It all seems perfectly natural to me. And regarding your mother, well…if her words ever cause doubt in your heart, remember ours instead; you are valid – just as valid as both Gandalf, and Frodo.”

You steadily beamed brightly, and found tears warming your eyes again. However, this time, they were out of the joy lighting up in your heart.

“Thank you, guys,” you said, nodding around at all of them. “I’m glad I have you all.”

[sunsetcurvecuddles]

Boggie cuddles featuring Luke just flopping onto Alex unprompted cause he feels left out

first of all i love u second of all this got away from me and turned into a luke character study what else is new. this is essentially a snippety sequel to maybe you find it stuck in your molars but a) you don’t need to read molars to understand this i don’t think and b) idk if it’s good enough to put on ao3 so have it here at least haha maybe i’ll change my mind.

as in molars: luke in this is trans, and ambiguously ace/aro spec. warning for some pretty mild transphobia.

--

The feeling of fighting with his mom makes the back of Luke’s neck prickle and his hands hurt. He feels so dumb about how angry he is, that even after the whole length of the bike ride to Bobby's, Luke still has the urge to stomp the ground and throw his helmet down when he stops. The only thing stopping him is his mom's words still ringing in his ears, that he's certainly acting like a teenaged boy, throwing a tantrum like that. He still drops his bike, almost pettily, to hear it clatter to the ground.

The rational part of his brain, however small and puny, knows she probably meant he was acting stupid and hot-headed. Which maybe he was. If she meant anything else, why would she have supported him so far? They were fighting about the band, like always, not his gender.

But the cold ice-pick of fear in his heart keeps going over "acting like a boy" over and over and over, acting like, as in not really—

He shakes it off and takes a few deep breaths. Puts his hands behind his head, elbows out wide, and closes his eyes. Just breathes. Knows he can't go into the studio with that kind of energy, or he'll psych Reggie out.

"Luke?"

It's Alex, at the door. He must have heard Luke drop his bike. The sight of him — fingers curled around the doorframe, messy hair in his eyes, eyebrows furrowed — immediately loosens whatever ugly tight feeling was building in Luke's chest. His denim jacket has slipped off one of his shoulders, and he looks so soft and warm. Like safety and home and acceptance. Like he's looked Luke's whole life.

"Hey, Lex," he says, and it comes out a little breathless, but he tries to play it off as just being from the bike ride. "Sorry I'm late."

"Are you..." Alex begins, but he must see Luke flinch, because he blatantly changes direction mid-sentence, "... gonna come in? Bobby got pizza."

Luke's stomach growls, absolutely without his permission, and Alex laughs, rolling his eyes and beckoning Luke to follow him, as if Luke wouldn’t follow Alex into the depths of hell without looking back.

The studio takes another layer of distress off Luke's shoulders. It's dimly lit at this time of day, just past sunset, and Bobby's guitar and Reggie's bass have been propped up on the ground rather than their stands, which means they were playing before Luke arrived.

Bobby and Reggie are curled up together on the couch, both munching away at slices of pizza, and Reggie's in Bobby's lap, which momentarily startles Luke. Not because they're cuddling (the most run-of-the-mill Sunset Curve activity possible) but because it reminds him that things have changed.

To be fair, he's doing a good job adjusting. Bobby and Reggie dating might have thrown him for a loop at first, but he's getting his head around it. He's at the point now where he can handle hearing Reggie talk about when he and Bobby went out last week, without being totally consumed by without us? Was it a date? and feeling nauseous. The way Bobby looks at Reggie no longer makes him feel squirmy, even if he does still find it confusing.

And they're two of his favourite people in the entire world. So if they're happy, he's happy. Seeing them cozied up and warm and eating actually makes Luke feel better than he did a moment ago.

Kinda makes him wish he was cozied up too, though. Just without all the other... stuff.

"Hey, Luke!" says Reggie cheerfully, his cheeks a little flushed and a smile pulling across his face, but his mouth is completely full of pizza so it sounds more like "Eeuke!"

Bobby's nose wrinkles in amusement, Alex's in mild disgust, but neither of them say anything about it, and Luke doesn't care because Reggie looks so relaxed and happy, simply says, "Hey, Reg. Bobby."

To his relief, neither of them ask why he's late. He can't tell if it's because they're being considerate, or if it's because they're totally absorbed by the pizza. He's happy with it either way. Bobby gives him a little nod, and then shuffles as Reggie tucks his head under Bobby's chin, Bobby's hand coming to rest on the sliver of Reggie's hip that's exposed by his t-shirt riding up.

Luke's chest hurts. Not in an actually bad way, like it used to before top surgery, when he'd worn his binder for too long. Just in a feelings way. Not that he knows what that feeling is, what he's meant to call it. It's not jealousy of Bobby and Reggie. He doesn't want to have whatever this different thing is that they have, can barely identify it between the lines when he looks for it.

He just wishes he was being held like that, and wishes he didn't constantly feel like he has to prove himself to people all the time, and wishes he could feel included, somehow, without interrupting them.

When Alex slumps back into his own seat on the couch, Luke can't stop himself. Unceremoniously, he flops across Alex's lap, too, and reaches for a slice of pizza before Alex can properly finish scoffing, Alex’s arms coming around his waist by instinct to stop him overbalancing and toppling to the floor.

"What the — dude, get off me!" Alex insists, but his voice has none of the sharp edge that it would if he actually meant it, if this was one of those times where Alex needed not to be touched. Luke grabs a piece of pizza in each hand and shimmies his way back up to seated, nose inches from Alex’s. Offers him the other piece with a bright grin.

This feels better. Alex grumbles, but takes a bite out of the pizza Luke held in front of his face, and the last of Luke’s bad feelings melt off him. Bobby and Alex start chatting about something — gig planning stuff, or a phone call Bobby had with some guy his brother knows who might be able to do some professional-looking photos for them on the cheap.

Alex is as warm and cuddly as he looked, and Luke rests his cheek on Alex’s shoulder to eat, still feeding Alex periodically with his other hand so that Alex doesn’t have to move more than necessary, and zones out of their conversation. He’s eating, and he’s getting cuddled, and he’s with his favourite people.

When they finish their food, they’ll probably have a more chill jam session than normal, full stomachs so no jumping around. Maybe he can run through his latest new draft with them. Get Alex to come up with a rhythm. See Reggie’s eyes light up as he plucks the bassline for the first time. Have Bobby try a few different harmonies, just to see what works.

Alex’s hand runs up and down Luke’s back once, smooth and solid, and Luke can’t help but melt into him, couldn’t do anything else if he tried. His ankle bumps Reggie’s and Reggie meets his eyes, grins just slightly, bumps back so their feet stay pressed together, Luke’s toes tucking under Bobby’s thigh. Bobby doesn’t even complain. Luke nudges his nose against Alex’s throat and mutters, “Love you guys,” and they all say it back without a single pause, without the slightest hesitation in the world.

--

now on ao3 as well

jatp taglist (lmk if you want to be added or removed): @queenmolina @nickalicious @bi-reginald @malecacidd @burntchromas @jughead-is-canonically-aroace @cinnamonstickrayofsunlight