#I’m sorry your mom hates you
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Fuck you and your “girlfriend.” Neither of you can experience trans misogyny because you aren’t normal transwoman. Stop being so weird with your fucking puppy pronouns. You are the reason my mom hates me, and people like her hate all of us.
Woah.
There is a lot going on here, but I can’t get past the bit about how you think your mom hates you because I’m a puppygirl.
#ask pirateprincessjess#hey anon#I’m sorry your mom hates you#but policing other peoples identities won’t fix the problem#I hope you can learn to love yourself
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I feel like something that should have been explored more in Arcane is that despite the dangers and pretty much horrific conditions, Zaun children seemingly grow up a lot more caring and have a larger understanding of family in comparison to Piltover children. And if such a reflection of the real world in a sense.
The kids of Zaun seemingly grow up with a lot more adult support. Ekko is easily welcomed under Benzo’s wings. Vander adopts 4 kids (two of which we learn he knew of before their parents death, two of which we can’t be sure of). Silco, despite all what happened, and his ulterior motives, shows no problem adopting Powder/Jinx. In the alternate universe it seems as though he’s still played a part in the kids lives. Jinx adopts Isha easily and Sevika cares for her as well. Hell, even Mr. War Crimes Against Humanity does well with little Viktor (until ya know, the animal abuse).
Hell, up until Vander dies (the first time) there seems to be a large understanding of if there’s an orphan or a kid in need of guidance, take them in! (And certainly don’t inform them of your plans to turn a giant pink salamander into drugs and be confused when a nine year old doesn’t understand). If a kid wants to be your apprentice, let them! For the most part, until things all went wrong in the end of act 1 of season 1, the worst parts of Zaun seem pretty typical for any city in poverty.
Match that with what we see with how Caitlyn and Jayce grow up. Caitlyn is given adult support, yes, and it’s clearly a good adult mentor, but it’s not entirely by her choice. It’s been chosen for her. She’s safe, but there’s a lack of freedom of choice. Meanwhile, when Jayce gets older, and that same accident in Act 1 happens, the family that supported him and his mom turns their backs. His own mom doesn’t support him either, because she’s afraid of what he’s talking about, but also because he’s damming them to being outcasts.
Conversely, Vander is more than willing to take the fall for what Claggor, Milo, Vi and Powder did. He’s willing to go to prison for a long time, in order for them to have a better future. Despite Vi’s best efforts, he’s not going to listen to her (she is just a kid) and he’s not letting his family go down and get hurt.
Meanwhile, a man who grew up in this mentality, where there’s a wide sense of family support from people who aren’t your biological family, is the one to go to Jayce, a stranger, and tells him he believes in him. It’s why it’s such a shock to Jayce; his own family and family friends denied him. They didn’t support him.
I think that’s what makes all the difference. Piltover and Zaun have wildly different understandings of family and forgiveness. For Piltover, it shuns and damns the lives of those who upset the balance. For Zaun, it provides safety and never ending understanding.
Just. I’m thinking.
#arcane#arcane season 1#I didn’t mean to make this a jayvik thing it just happened#is this where I admit I don’t care Cassandra died#oops she was a baddie and I feel bad for cait but go get your trauma glow up girl#go get some character development#sorry but Cassandra didn’t give a shit about Jayce until it turns out he really did have something#and when it came time she only voted for Zaun independence and wasn’t even the first or second mind you#to vote to agree#hell despite possibly knowing Viktor for 7+ years and knowing how much Jayce cares for him#and how important he was to hextech#she did not even support it until last minute and then boom#sorry to cait love you girl but your mom was giving go girl give us nothing#Cassandra kiramman hate#that’s fun tag for someone who barely had screen time#jayce talis#viktor arcane#jayvik#caitlyn kiramman#I love Caitlyn don’t think any differently I forgive her for her crimes#listen if I can ignore Viktor’s assimilation plots I can ignore her war crimes#I’m a forgiving woman#arcane thoughts
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I love you peri-weri one of these days I’ll learn how to draw you consistently
I think what we need for season 2 is some good ol perirep slapstick I need to see them scrapping it out like looney tunes
#fairly oddparents a new wish#perirep#peridale#peri fairywinkle cosma#fop irep#dale dimmadome#timmy turner#sammy sweetsparkle#juandissimo magnifico#my art#in case it wasn’t clear. perirep is my fav#but what’s the ship name for irep peri and sammy they’re a funny trio#poor sammy is he the third or third-wheeling no one knows#they’re all just drunk college kids in that#juandissimo isn’t trying to be weird he’s just got nothing going on in his head all the meat is in the muscles#but peri is having a gay panic#that’s got to be weird. your mom’s hot ex constantly ripping his shirt off like hm maybe I’m gay#I’m so normal about Dale saying ‘come to daddy’ what are you talking about#just realized this is the first time I’ve ever drawn timmy let alone fairy timmy#sorry timmy turner I love you#fop a new wish#fop fanart#okay it’s after 1am now though I should sleep#the art overtook my brain I had to do this before sleeping#poor dev losing his godparent to his terrible dad#realistically I think peri would probably hate dale. but the shipping part of my brain is too intrigued to fully dismiss it
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it’s 5:20am i cannot sleep i am consumed with thoughts and yearning for keigo takami i need to be euthanized
#literally these days all i do is Lay Awake and Wither Away#the nightmares have been exponentially worse lately#fun fact ur local fanfic author has Problems.#idk man there’s just something haunting about having reoccurring nightmares about your ex and every time u close ur eyes it’s throwing u#right back into the pit of hell that was that relationship#it’s fine it’s fine it’s fine i just no Longer Trust People#anyways this is a vent post and it is so cringe and lame#i just have never Hated an ex before so there’s a lot i’m coming to terms with especially considering how Fake he is#idek man IDEK!!!!!1!!1!1!#i rlly sacrificed so much to love and live with him and he said ‘mmmmmm now i have u in my grip’#whatever it’s fine he’s stinky and honestly the fact honey (the blog intern and my cat) doesn’t miss him AT ALL says so much#seriously she is so nonplussed by his absence it’s wild#eating fine sleeping fine shitting fine#SAYS A LOT. SAAAAYS A LOT. whatever whatever whatever#i would hit that emotionally immature man with my car if given the chance and yknow what. nick if ur reading this you’re one of the#most.#emotionally immature people ive ever had the misfortune of knowing.#what a shame you lost me#the best thing and healthiest thing that ever happened to you#because of your own actions and your own inability to take accountability for your mental health and actions#tell your mom i say hi#and tell your exes im sorry i ever doubted any of them x_x#WEEEEE what a vent#listen to big sister birbs when she says don’t date men who have something horrific to say about each of their exes
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JoJo Siwa doesn’t deserve all the hate (and homophobia) she’s getting for her style and music; but she does deserve scrutiny for defending Colleen Ballinger and being both active and complicit in abuse that happened on her TV show. Like the girl has been under the public eye in unhealthy environments all her life; cut her some slack — not too much; she’s still a responsible adult — but if you’re going to dogpile her, then at least dogpile her for the right reasons. Jesus Fucking Christ.
#jojo siwa#discourse#Her comment sections are VILE#I actually don’t hate her songs. They’re basically early-2000s new old stock and I like early 2000s music#Is she trying too hard to look like an “adult?” Yes. But that’s understandable.#What isn’t understandable is screaming at children for no fucking reason#and JoJo not helping at all when a girl was hemorrhaging out her belly button#when JoJo’s mother told the girl to “put a pad on it”#I don’t care how afraid you are of your parents; you END that shit the second you see it#I was raised in a cult and I actively sabotaged my parents’ preaching work on multiple occasions#I didn’t know if I’d get kicked out if they found out I did that; the only reason I still have a relationship with them#is because they never found out about my later sabotage#Dad preached to a waitress dangling a cure for her sons’ disorder in front of her nose as incentive to join and gave her literature#So I went to the restaurant with him and insisted I pay for the tip.#I gave her eight dollars and a sticky note with a bunch of keywords about the cult’s abuses to look up#The next time I went there#she said didn’t understand the sticky note and asked me while he was gone what I meant#I hate talking to people especially when I’m under pressure because I trip over my words even when I’m NOT anxious#But her kids’ lives being free of a cult meant more to me than avoiding a momentary discomfort so I gave a quick rundown#She thanked me and heeded my warning basically playing along with me and not saying anything to my dad about it#I was 20; JoJo was about 19 when her show was going on#She had no excuse for allowing her mom to do that.#At the very least she could have said “Oh god I’m so sorry she said that. Please don’t hurt yourself for my show; go to the hospital.”#But no. She didn’t do that. In fact she screamed at children and joked that if they were crying then it was a good show.#Bitch come here and do that in front of me. I double dog dare you. I may only be 5’5” but I fight dirty and I’m angrier than you#Sorry. I guess I do hate her… for THAT specifically.#Like yeah I’ve fucked up with the kids I help and yelled when I didn’t have to but I HATED doing it and tried to do better later#Why someone would SCREAM at kids on purpose for long periods of time for no reason is beyond me
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like. Nina listens to Taylor, moderately keeps up with the front-facing aspects of her life, enjoys her quality, has her minor critiques, recognizes her place in the current culture, can set her down and do other things when she wants to, and most importantly knows who Taylor is through her art.
#you cannot engage with Taylor completely casually it doesn’t work#you won’t get to know her#you have to let her in. go on a sunset walk with your headphones in and open your heart to her and just HEAR her#and then once you know who she is you can go from there#but there absolutely is this level of refusing to get to know her#and I am truly (once again) not addressing people who have that door simply closed (my mom! my older sister!)#people whose opinions matter so much to me#but I am talking to the people who wrestle and want to love her but actually hate her and idk. I feel that it is something where—-#well it’s like people isn’t it. you have to get to know her without judgment#and without bias#you have to know her FROM her#(which does not involve Easter eggs OR celebrity headlines if you hate both of those things#and then if you don’t like her you do in fact have to leave without making that other people’s problem#especially Taylor’s!#I am thinking of this girlboss journalist who wrote a piece on Taylor the other day#that was LIVID with Taylor for sharing only positive reviews on her insta story#(as is not only Taylor’s right but literally normal behavior??????????)#and was practically foaming at the mouth about how Taylor’s level of power was getting scary#and it’s like. I’m so sorry for swearing but BITCH#a lot of the numbers are out of Taylor’s control and also NOT REAL. Taylor also DESERVES her success and is simply doing her job very well#and riding the waves of virality she knows how to create in ADDITION to that#also stop worshipping power and money!!!! the way you clearly do!!!!!!!#Taylor is not doing anything with it except her job!!!!!!!!!!!!!#she is also CLEARLY a human being who suffers#SEE HER AS SUCH#and end it THERE#INSANE#turning off reblogs for this one#because I have gotten carried away but wow
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um shes also my beloved mutual
WHY AM I JUST NOW SEEING THIS
#so sorry first of all#but i read like the first half of the article before they asked me to subscribe#and wow#someone made an entire article about the commonality of my name 😭 like i need a reminder#but THIS IS ALSO SO FUNNY#like yeah guys pls mention the very popular former one direction fan blogger named emily 😕😕#cause i am The Emily#also fun fact my name is SUPER common but i actually have never had to share a class with an emily or even had an emily in my graduating#class#which i am very grateful for!!#also i’m abt to send a pic to you that i took like a few weeks ago but forgot to show you#and something funny is that my mom HATES when i bring up how i don’t like having a basic name#which is valid#but she’s always like ugh you have no idea how hard it is to figure out what to name your child#and then says she got my name from a book …#and her goal was to name me and my sisters all names of Irish origin#(we don’t even know if we’re irish)#and she thought emily was but it’s literally not 😭#however my sister’s names both are so 👏👏 2/3 pretty solid#and they also have mildly unique names i’m totally not jealous#betsy boop#ask#love you sorry for missing this
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there’s being a teenage girl in your 20s then there’s whatever the fuck the babyface by sorry mom experience is
#i absolutely hate the phrase ‘teenage girl in your 20s’ idea it’s infantilising and will only stunt yr mental + emotional development#because if you keep doing that you’ll be 30 something saying shit like ‘i’m a 21 year old in my 30s’ which just sounds worse lol#and so on#and it’s not exactly a new phenomenon either bc women (mainly) will say they’re 21 with x amount of years extra experience#it’s just. idk. the obsession with perpetual yourh looks worse on people who are already young i guess#anyway back to babyface sorry mom. the album of all time; resonates with the ‘teenage girl in your 20s’ idea#(which for me has always been about being directionless and lost in life and feeling younger because you can see all your other 20-something#friends grow up and get jobs and finish their degrees n shit. and that makes you feel younger; almost teenager like)#(whereas i see a lot of people saying ‘teenage girl in my 20s’ as a way of almost bragging about being immature??#like not knowing how to do things or speak on certain subjects#stuff like ‘when he talks to me about the economy but i’m#literally a teenage girl in my 20s’ LIKE DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELF??#and of course i’m not shaming people for not knowing shit i mean look at me. i can’t drive i have no job and i dropped out of uni#but the REFUSAL to learn is astounding. like people think they can get away with being deliberately oblivious because they have#the self-proclaimed mentality of a teenage girl. and how do you think Actual Teenage Girls feel about people assigning their demographic as#being oblivious and vapid and lacking awareness#you know. traits that have historically been assigned to teenage girls that I Can Actively Remember trying to not associate with.#and my female peers were also arguing against as teenagers.#i dunno. in the words of tame impala it feels like we only go backwards)#long tags#kaycore#(fuck it. putting this in the sorry mom tag)#sorry mom band#babyface sorry mom
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#the way my sister complains about having no games for her ds and switch when she let both of her exes keeps all of the games#like girl you could have took some of them and you didn’t!!! why is this suddenly my problem#my mom is telling me to be nice and share when switch games don’t work like that#and I don’t trust her to not mess stuff up in the game for me#like she threw away half of my nail polish today because I kept it in her room before she moved back in bc my room is very small and she#thought that gave her liberty to throw the ones she thought looked old away???#and then she got mad when I made her dig them out of the trash like!!!! you could have just brought them over to my room like a normal#person but you decided to start throwing shit out instead#anyway I’m sorry for complaining it’s just annoying having everyone tell me to be nice when I couldn’t be nicer#just because you’re going through a hard time doesn’t mean you can snap at mom when she asks a simple question#‘but it reminds me of my girlfriend and how she always fights with me 🥺’ but you knew mom for longer and you know she hates when people get#upset with her!!! and it sucks bc she doesn’t understand how hard it is to be the only person my parents can complain to because they#don’t have friends#she doesn’t understand why I’m the one always confronting her about stuff when my parents are scared of her getting mad at them bc every#time you say something simple like ‘hey don’t leave your shoes in the middle of the floor’ she gets upset and I’m the only one who doesn’t#let it actually get to me… at least it doesn’t bother me after I post a tumblr rant okay bye#it’s just the same childhood drama except she’s almost 30 and I’m almost 21 like be serious
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act 3, or as I like to call it: Orin PLEASE stop negging me
#s2g everywhere I turn….#minthara call your crazy ex off my tail I’m mclosing it#also fuck this kid who won’t leave me alone#do you think my companipns would hate me if I judt….killed her#I’m really tired of her already and I told her to go away but then she showed up at camp#i have not like a single child in this game but I also just. dislike children Ahkaajsksk#i DID gain approval from minthara when i basically said ‘fuck them kids’ tho so#at least my queen would stand by me#like I’m a very evil weezard who doesn’t want some snot nosed brat around and doesn’t give a shit about a ‘missing mom’#anyway…end rant#bg3 spoilers#honestly sorry for being such a hater bc like#i know on demeter’s run she’s going to love yenna - she likes kids and is a mother#and would be very protective of her#but iraestra??? already told the brat to get lost and she doesn’t like Repeating Herself#lmfao if orin takes her she’ll be like ok go ahead and kill the kid i dont care actually
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I spoke too soon I should have known that was too easy for him I’m so tired I was like hey! I might have found someone interested in subleasing, if they end up not wanting to ill start making posts places but either way, ill need a move in date to advertise and tell people. Do you have any estimates of when you might find a place yet?
And my fucking roommate replies with a bunch of links to apartments like well you could move HERE like fuck you fuck you fuck you jackass this wasn’t what we agreed on and also 90% of the places he sent me were places I already contacted and had no availability/a waitlist/couldn’t sign until august and the other 10% were WAY out of my price range also none of this solves that I don’t want to sign a new fucking lease cuz I want out of this fucking fuck ass city between you and your bf you make almost TRIPLE what I do you will have such an easier time finding a new place and moving plus you wanna stay in this stupid fucking fuck ass city just fucking GET OUT
#i am genuinely starting to hate this dipshit#I get moving sucks!#but also this is all YOUR fault so YOU should get the shittier end of the deal sorry not sorry#also me living on my own means I will go from about 600 dollars of extra income s month#to about 200 to fucking ZERO depending on what the rent is#how about you kill yourself#‘I’m not trying to make this harder for you’#you are actively fucking me over in sooooo many fucking ways dude because you are incapable of considering other human beings#he also has less bills than me?????#like motherfucker doesn’t even have a car payment cuz his mom GAVE him a car be fucking for real#he’s spent his whole life pretty much kinda jusy doing whatever he wants and getting whatever he wants#and it’s reallyyyyyyy starting to fucking show with this situation#GOD#I told him that doesn’t work for me and explained why to him AGAIN#and he has no answered so lol we’ll see#he was also like ‘but you’ll still have to live with someone you don’t know and you didn’t want that 🥺🥺’#like oh my god#yeah in an ideal world! no! I wouldn’t be doing that#but the issue wasn’t literally living with some guy I don’t know#it was being walked all over and treated like shit and not considered#nor was I asked about it lol like now I’m seeking a new roommate I was never doing that when you moved him in so I wasn’t prepared for it#fuck you for all of a sudden acting like you care about what’s ‘best for me’#and that it’s living alone when it quite literally fucking isn’t for so many reasons#you just don’t wanna fucking move and are scrambling now that I’m actually enforcing this#kysssssssssssss#kaz rambles
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I should sleep
#instead I’m thinkinb#holidays are scary because you don’t get that confirmation that your friends still like you#because they don’t talk to you daily#which is normal but my brain seems to have decided that they all hate me#AND I KNOW IT ISNT TRUE#but still#the little voice#I shared tiramisu with my uncle today#it was nice#and the cousins played monopoly and they all gave me their money when they stopped#(I’m the favourite hehehehe /j)#nah I’m just the oldest which looks the same from the outside#also multiple far family members didn’t reconize me#not sure how to feel about that#and I watched spiderverse with my little brother#and read#lots#if I can read 52 books next year#my mom will buy me a book!!!#sorry for rambling#in the tags#it’s just too much fun#good night
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idk how i feel about 2012 tmnt because I love it don’t get me wrong but……eh
somethings just coudve been done better
the characters definitely coudve been done better
the relationships……..yea
what I will say tho is
characters
2012 April isn’t bad but she’s so much and so little of a character that she just comes off bland
Donnie…..honestly he’s not bad but the crush definitely ruins him a bit
raph I don’t hate at all and if you do……..you clearly don’t understand people with anger problems
Mikey is an idiot and pretty gullible sometimes and honestly I’m upset they didn’t try and help or at least teach him better cause wtf
Leo is babygirl prove me wrong
Casey……eh in my opinion he’s just bland most of the time
karai is a dumb b-tch with massive issues that just make her come off as a d-ck prove me wrong
karai lesbian confirmed?
splinter is alright do I think he could’ve been better in the teacher and dad department yes do I think he did well for his situation and circumstances yes does that make up for his sh-tty character handlement……no.
the relationships…..loooord these bastards…..here we go
the implied ship material in the show ruined the way people saw leo and karai’s relationship and I am so mad
again I hate love triangles and this f-cking thing (April x Donnie vs April x Casey)is so annoying f-ck off no one cares anymore pls just move on good god you ruin whatever character you have for a love triangle you won’t let die Jesus Christ
raph and Mona are the only saving grace when it comes to actual canon ships in this show prove me wrong I dare you they are adorable
#my stuffy stuff#tmnt 2012#rant#no I’m not sorry#if I wanna rant about a show I haven’t seen in years I will#disagree if you will but this is how I feel#raph gets to much hate in show and out and I’m mad about it cause wtf was that one episode in season one I think#Mikey is jsut childish which isn’t a bad thing but when that’s all your character is besides stupid most of the time#it paints a certain picture#Donnie honestly gets looked over so much because of his crush and I’m mad…..but it does destroy his character and I wish his crush didn’t#exist plural but whatever#Leo is mom and babygirl and I am again mad at the hate he gets in show and out cause again……wtf#karai……is karai….#April is bland…like she’s got so many problems yet so little screentime or so little problems and so much screentime either way it feels#wasted#Casey……is Casey kinda weird kinda creepy kinda sleezy and kinda bland…….that’s all the only time I liked him was in the one farm episode#not sorry#splinter has so much angst so much problem yet so little time to process or get closure for it and he honestly just flip flops#from being useful and kicking -ss to doing absuloutly nothing about anything#it’s like the writers couldn’t decide what to do with him#so he just becomes a filler in the end which sucks cause he’s great#can I also say the whole aprils friend is secretly a kraang droid was so f-cking stupid…..like what?#anyways
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Omg yesterday at my moms therapy I said how well I had been doing and feeling like I can actually handle life and my mom was immediately like “that’s because you’ve been taking your meds regularly again” and like completely brushed off any progress I had actually made and I had to be like yeah totally that’s it that’s why exactly when I haven’t taken my meds for a week straight in idk how long
#I was like yup totally that sure is why I’ve been feeling good totally#not at all that I’ve been spending time to do things I like and journal and process my feelings in healthy ways or that I am consciously#making strides towards regular person sanity#and she fucking brought up adhd meds again like FUCK OFFFFFFF HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY I DONT WANT TO TAKE THEM BEFORE IT CLICKS#I. DONT. WANT. TO. TAKE. THEM. they are a tool in MY mental health toolbox bitch back off my toolbox I know you fucking live adhd meds and#won’t shut up about them but I am happy now and I don’t like my brain on adhd meds and the only reason you want me on them is because you#like me more when I’m doing stereotypically productive tasks so you’d rather have me cleaning the house and not doing the shit I love than#you would have me not taking my meds and making art and writing poetry#like god#she just doesn’t fucking get it#I cannot create when I take adhd meds. that part of my brain just like dissolves.#the way I work is that constantly I have a million projects on the back burner in my mind and when I get inspired I make one#when I take my adhd meds I can’t just pick up a fun project I don’t get those ideas I can’t write poetry I can’t make art it’s like it sever#severs the line between my creative mind and my regular mind and I have nothing in my life that I need to be THAT focused on right now#but I have my perscruption still! like if I ever need it it’s there but that’s not your fucking decision that’s mine and you need to back#off my brain because it is a delicate fucking ecosystem up there in my head and I’m not going to fuck with anything until I have to#god. sorry. went on a bit of a rant. I am just so sick of arguing over my mom wanting to control the way I medicate myself. I am an adult#and she is not inside my brain so she needs to listen when I tell her how things affect me#she takes adhd meds like twice every day and hates the feeling of not being on them but I just don’t like them and she won’t fucking drop it#okay I am getting mad about adhd meds and my mother right before I have to be in the car with her all morning i need to relax#we’re going to psychic we’re gonna have fun#we’re not going to argue about this again.
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so fucking frustrated bc I tried to give myself a Brazilian wax again bc it wasn’t that great the first time and panicked when I got to the lips and had to stop and now I have to wait until this weekend to pay for the rest of the job for fucking full price like wtf
#and I wanna go today to finish it but my mom won’t take me since I don’t drive#and keep tryna tell me that she can finish it like no I don’t fucking want your help#bc you don’t know how to fucking do it so why even fucking play like that#I’m so irritated I keep crying#cause I know this shit is gonna hurt like fuck bc I missed certain spots#so technically it’ll be like two months without being waxed in certain areas#I just wanna sleep forever I hate this shit and I hate my body for being fucking stupid#sorry I’m just really upset#tw: vent#—in store chit chat! 🍫
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me to Nina yesterday: explaining how due to a headache and exhaustion I wasted away the end of my afternoon just watching Ryan Gosling interviews
Nina, instantly sympathetic: and I completely understand that, a valid thing to do
#the thing about Nina is that most of the time she not only hates my coping mechanisms she also plain doesn’t understand them#one of the many tensions of our relationship#but she was just 100% like yeah. I fully get it#and it made me feel so much better#my relationship with Nina the work of a lifetime because the moments of mutual understanding are so rare#but so powerful when they happen. and it takes years to discover that sudden gold#(my mom is often so troubled by our relationship. she’s just like (whisper voice): do you guys even like each other)#because we’re just SO sparks fly (antagonistic version) in many of our interactions#and it’s just like. YEAH. We’re just going to have an intense altercation and clashing of opinions viewpoints values and perspectives#at least every other day. LOL#but we will navigate it!#no one on the planet I smooth things over with as fast as Nina. it is lightning-speed reconciliation#because we both move on so quickly in the same way. in that the mood will just lift#we got in a fight the other day. Nina left and stormed out. 10 minutes later I get a text going#‘I’m sorry Maria. I should not have said that about your mother’#which made me laugh because we weren’t fighting about our mom. She just likes to quote Jacqueline from ever after sometimes out of context#and my mom was on the couch watching me like ‘you’re reconciled???? It’s over?????????’#because my mom a) is so different from both of us in the speed she processes in and b) has no sisters#0 sisters. 4 daughters. and she still isn’t used to it lol. because my mom’s strength and weakness is that she never gets used to anything!#ALSO Nina told me the other day that I’m the one that taught her to apologize because I would just make her do it when we were kids#not to me but to other people! I would just sit there and explain how verbal acknowledgement of wrongdoing would make things better#and she was always like ‘ughhh I hate it so much. FINE’ because she always does want to make things better#anyway this SHOOK ME TO MY CORE. Because I never thought Nina actually internalized any of the things I’ve said to her ever lol#and she was like ‘yeah you gave me that good habit’#(I love apologizing. Love to put it into words and I have an intense need to do it immediately and thoroughly)#(tbh it’s only with time that I’ve come to see that other people do not work that way. and need more time. and are not just —#instantly comfortable putting everything into words especially the hard things)#(because it’s not like I’m always driven by more charity and compunction. I just ducking HATE unresolved things not put into words)#(so it helps me feel better. and sometimes you just gotta learn to not say it right away if it’s only going to make things worse#(or learn to say it in different way without words. that actually communicates the sorrow. And that can sometimes look like giving space!)
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