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#I’m so sad we didn’t get to see them walking around in their long johns
carnevol · 18 days
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Stalag Fashion
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luversgirl · 10 months
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TO BE SO LONELY, part two
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summary: after the pouges forget her special day, y/n meets someone the pouges aren’t too pleased with. (heres part one if you haven’t read it yet)
notes: here is the long awaited pt two, im sorry this took to long. i’m in the middle of finals and im trying to get back into writing (p.s theirs another important note after the fic)
warnings: language?
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after the big fight at the chateau rafe drove them to the beach, more specifically the one they first interacted at.
y/n quickly slipped off the helmet and walked towards the water without a word said.
as she got closer and closer she placed the helmet and shopping bag down and continued walking.
“y/n!” rafe yelled trying to catch up.
“y/n!” he yelled again a bit more sternly making her stop in her tracks.
he quickly caught up seeing as he was walking very fast to keep up with her “please talk to me” he softly spoke as he stopped in front of her.
“there’s nothing for me to say” she spoke back clearly lying as many tears rolled down her face.
“you’re allowed to be upset y/n” rafe says placing his hands on her face, wiping her tears away.
“how come everyone forgets me” y/n’s voice cracks as she speaks.
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after y/n broke down at the beach rafe thought it would be best for her to stay at the cameron household for the night.
waking up to the sun peaking through out the expensive silky curtains the rougtledge girl rubbed her eyes.
her eyebrows furrowed at the unfamiliar smell of the sheets she was laying on, turning her body around she saw a sleeping rafe.
she sat up, carefully doing her best to to wake rafe and succeeding.
y/n’s eyes gazed around the room that was clearly rafes. it pleasantly surprised her how organized his room was, the way all his expensive colognes were organized, no laundry on the floor and the pictures of his family and him displayed along the walls.
“good morning” y/n turned to rafe who was now rubbing his eyes as she was minutes before.
“good morning” she smiled as he pulled her closer kissing the top on her head.
“how you feeling baby” rafe asks.
“better now thanks to you” y/n grins looking up at him “what time is it?”
rafe grabs his phone from the nightstand by his side “its 12” he says.
“i have a shift at 1” y/n sighs leaning against rafe.
“can you cancel it?” rafe trys to reason.
y/n chuckles “thats not exactly how a job works, wheres my phone?” she asks.
“under your pillow” y/n reaches for it, hopingit doesn’t explode with messages when it powers on “i also put it on silent so we could sleep through the night” rafe chuckles.
“thank you” y/n smile up at him before checking “jesus christ” she quickly says as she was right about the phone blowing up and
scrolls through all the missed notifications.
“you okay?” rafe asks observing her face.
closing her eyes, y/n takes a deep breath then setting her phone down onto the bed and started to get out of the plush cameron bed.
“woah, woah, woah, where you going sweet thing?” rafe quickly followed now standing in front of her with his hands on each side of her face caressing her soft cheekbones with his thumbs.
“rafe” y/n smiles and tilts her head up looking at the tall boy.
“you know, not all of us can be kooks” sending him a sad smile.
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shortly after rafes constant attempts to get y/n not to go to work he accepted his loss in the battle and dropped her off.
she was 2 hours into her shift and nothing had gone wrong yet, but of course she knew something was bound to happen seeing as her brother and his friends new where she worked so it was all just a matter of time.
as soon as her break hits she’s pushing the back door of the the store open for some fresh air only to be met with the pouges.
“what do you guys want” y/n spoke sitting on her usual break bench and gave into her fate.
“i don’t understand why’d you do this to us” john b speaks up first.
y/n eyebrows furrow “i didn’t ‘do’ anything to do” she emphasizes the ‘do’ “not everything is about you bee” using her brother nickname only reserved for her.
“i never said tha-“ john b interjects.
“but thats what you meant, you know i’m actually happy?” y/n humourless laughs then begins to raises her voice “i don’t remember the last time i’ve even been this happy and the second you find out its not in a way you ‘approve’ of you want to try and take it from me”
“we-“ jj tries to interject something else but y/n doesn’t even give him the chance as she grows angrier every time they say something.
“you know he hasn’t bothered you guys in months but you’re all too self absorbed in your fucking shit to even see that and where the fuck was all this when john started dating sarah” y/n’s voice quivers but also grows louder as she stands up “huh?”
“i always supported you and sarah” y/n addresses the young couple making eye contact with the cameron who continued to remain silent “nice to know kindness is a one way street with you guys”
“y/n we never meant to try take away your happiness” kie spits out as y/n starts towards the door.
she turns around to face the pouges “then what were you trying to do?” they all look down at the ground or just stay silent.
“that’s what i thought”
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important note!: hi! recently i reached 2k followers (what the actual fuck) so i’ve decided to come up with a little celebration. this celebration would guys yall the option to send in a prompt, blurb, rec list request and stuff like that for any of the characters i would list (like obx for example) would that interest you guys or am i dululu as fuck? lmk through a simple anon or commenting, thanks! ♡
taglist: @faeaura @prettyboystarkey @euthoricspidey @pankowfruitsnacks @rafecameronswhore @yunho-leeknow @outeredits-jess @totallynotkaibiased @jjmaybankslittleslut
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flowerfreya · 2 months
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Repercussions
The next part in the office AU
Masterlist
Content: Readers ex boyfriend tries to win her back( does not go well ) and then she discovers she has a crush on all four of them *gasp*
Pairing : poly!141 x reader
If have any thing you want to see from this group of people, please let me know. Lowkey running out of ideas lol
Price, Soap, and Ghost stand in front of the room where you were just taken. “She’s just trying to get attention”, he shifts his gaze to Price, “You know what I mean?”, he raises his eyebrows in a know what I mean motion. 
Price is not amused ,“No, I don't know what you mean”.
“Maybe you need to take a walk”, Soap says. He tries to guide him to entrance but your ex is  a glutton for punishment. 
“No,she a bitch, she used me as a gold digger”,he spits out, waving his arms and yelling and honestly embarrassing himself. 
“Mate, you need gold in order for that to happen”, Simon is trying to move him away from the door but he is very persistent. 
“You take another step it will be your last in this building” 
He slowly turns around, “You can’t do that, there's a process”, he smirks, thinking that he’s won. 
“Oh I know the process, we have been doing the process”, he lists all the things that your ex-boyfriend has been doing or in this case, not doing. 
Price has always had a problem with your ex boyfriend, they hired him on a whim and they needed a body. They had hoped that he would have no call , no show and they could help him but alas , he very very sadly persisted. He started fucking up almost four months ago, showing up late leaving early , taking long lunches. Price had finally found his in. He’s been putting in the work with Kyle to fire him, that when he brought you in for an interview. 
Price knew that men like him , took out his frustration on the women in his life because that's just the man he is. So he put a pause on it, you didn’t deserve that. When he got that call from Simon that you had called asking for help he knew that it was a sign.
Your ex is still moaning and bitching about you, then he says something that makes you not care. 
“Oh shut the fuck up” , you yell at him and walking out the backroom. He’s shocked that you responded, you're usually very passive in this , thinking it’s easy to agree then to argue. He starts stuttering, not used to this from you. 
“Uh -u -u -u” , you mock him. You get close to him so tired of just taking it. You’re so done with him. 
“Nothing to say?” , you ask him. He looks around like one of your guys are going to help but he finds none. 
“Can you do me favor and just fucking go?” ,you're so pissed that you let yourself get to this level, this sad sad place, where knowing that you need better, that you deserve better but just staying. Settling. 
He tries to change tactics with you, “Baby, please you know that I’m sorry, I messed up please forgive me”, he gets tears in the corner of his eyes. 
You scoff, “You know you caused this , you decided to leave me here and be a jerk when I asked you to pick me up”, you pause and wait for him to respond and he has nothing to say. 
“We are done, over, never getting back together, wrap your brain around that”. 
He tries to say something else but John cuts him off and leads( pushes) him toward the exit. 
Once he’s out the door, you kind of deflate when you no longer see him. Kye places his hand on your shoulder, “Alright?”, you want to go home and curl into a ball and drink dessert wine still your stomach hurts. 
“Can I go home?”, you don’t make eye contact with him even though you know that he is trying to connect with you. You can’t do life today and being with all of them today is going to be too much. You are single for the first time in a very long time and you have a crush on your boss ... .and coworker ... .and your other coworker… and your HR rep. How do you go from hating your only romantic partner to having a crush on four people? 
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gaysindistress · 1 year
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Sad girl - nineteen
summary: James has an interesting new business proposal and one hell of a condition to deal with.
pairing: Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader
warnings: cursing, Bucky’s smartass, angst, guns, violence, Walker has decided that he wants to be Joe Goldberg, character death, talks of blood, gunshots, mentions of funerals and past character deaths, the feels, I’m sorry for your hearts
A/n: i had originally planned out 20 parts but the last part was only 800 words so I combined 19 & 20 into one. We made it! I’m so grateful and appreciative for all of the love and support! I’m excited for what comes next!
word count: 3.4K
part 18 | series masterlist
Taglist: @missvelvetsstuff @angelsincident @spencerreidisagorgman @goldensunflowe-r   @i-have-no-life-charlie @esposadomd @iateall-yourcookies  @littlelizardlizzie @alana4610 @kandis-mom @beware-my-thorns @ozwriterchick @reader-without-a-story @unaxv @wh0reforbucknasty @cjand10​  @vickie5446 @katymae12344 @callsign-athena @openup-yourmind
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disclaimer: credits to original creator/poster of image/gif. found on google/Pinterest
“Jesus Christ,” Sam mutters under his breath as they walk into the foyer. 
Laying at the bottom of the stairs is Pepper, still and unresponsive. Steve kneels down to check her pulse but the pool of blood around her tells them everything they need to know. A thud from upstairs has them pointing their guns toward it and slowly stalking up the stairs. Steve creeps up the stairs first with Sam close behind. The office door creaks up and reveals a bloody Bucky with his gun in their direction.
He lowers it slightly upon seeing them, “Took you long enough. Anthony and Marianne are dead. He just grazed my arm but I don’t know where he went.” 
Steve whips the backpack around and grabs the kit out as they all walk into the office to assess the damage to his arm. John had grazed over the same spot he’d been shot earlier as if he already knew that’s where he was injured. As they’re wrapping his arm, Sam checks the pulses of the two bodies but finds the same as they did with pepper; nothing. 
“Did you guys see Morgan or Pepper?” 
“We found Pepper at the bottom of the stairs but not Morgan, were we supposed to?” 
Wincing at the tightness of the wrap, Bucky says “Anthony sent Peter to find them. You didn’t see Morgan or Peter though?” 
“No, we came in, saw her, heard you, and came upstairs. We haven’t cleared the building yet,” Sam pauses, sniffing the air, “Do you guys smell that?” 
The other two men sniff the air as well as the smell grows stronger. Sam starts to cough as he gets closer to the door and clouds of smoke start to waft into the room. 
“He’s set the house on fire. We have to get out NOW!” 
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As they get closer to the mansion, smoke clouds pummel in the sky, obviously concerning both women. 
“Please God don’t let that be the house,” she whispers under her breath as they speed past the open gates and down the driveway. 
Her prayers are not answered as Nat slams on the brakes at the sight of the south end of the house on fire. Doll rips open the door, stumbling as she falls out of the car and catches herself on the gravel. Nat throws her door open as well, racing over to the passenger side and helping her up. 
“No, no, no we have to go in. They’re all in there,” she fights against Nat’s grip as she shrieks. 
Thor and Loki come running out of the house, hands over their mouths as they cough from the smoke. 
“Where is everyone?” she yells at them as she breaks free from Nat’s grip and runs to them. 
“I don’t know, we were out in the stables when we saw the smoke,” Thor replies, out of breath. 
Loki catches her by the waist as she tries to push past them to get to the house, “Let go of me! Morgan and Bucky are in there!” “We can’t go in there. It’s not safe.”
Her fighting is useless against the taller and stronger man, still, she tries her best to break free. The familiar sound of gunshots rings through the air. She whips her head in the direction of the shots only to see John stalking towards them, gun smoking in his hand. The group takes off as more shots rip through the air and one hits Thor in the leg, crumpling him. They try to pause to help him but he waves them on. 
“Go, keep running,” He tells them as he draws his weapon, “I’ll hold him off for as long as I can.”
“I’ll stay too brother. You two run now,” Loki shouts at them, pointing towards the back lot of the mansion. 
“Sweetheart,” John’s voice tears through the women’s ears as they scramble off the ground and take off. 
More shots are fired as they flee from the scene. Gruff voices and cries chase them as they get further and further from the house. Breaking through to the forest that sits behind the Stark estate, the two women pause to catch their breath. Nat yanks her phone from her back pocket and dials Bucky, Steve, and Sam separately but to no avail. 
“Shit, okay, we have to make it back to our car,” Nat tells Doll, still out of breath. 
The sound of branches breaking and heavy footsteps snaps both of their attention to the entrance of the forest. Emerging from behind some trees is Peter with a terrified Morgan in his arms. The little girl jumps from Peter and races towards her sister who falls to her knees and grips her tightly in a hug. 
“Oh my god, you’re okay. You’re okay,” she whispers with relief into the little girl’s hair, “Are you hurt?”
The girl shakes her head quickly, tears flowing steadily down her small face. Doll kisses her forehead and picks her up. 
“What’s the plan now?” Peter asks the two older women. 
“It’s starting to get dark so we’ll have a better chance at hiding but so will he. We need to make our way back to the house and to our car. I’m assuming one of the neighbors already called 911 with the amount of smoke,” Nat says quickly looking behind all of them, “I saw the SUV but not any of the boys. Did you see them when you left, Peter?”
“No, I left before everything happened. I found Mrs. Stark and her,” gesturing to Morgan he continues, “and we fled out the front. John was coming down the stairs and shot Mrs. Stark before we could get out. I just ran with her. I’m so sorry.” 
Doll places her hand on his shaking shoulder, “It’s okay. It’s not your fault. You did your job and got Morgan out, that’s all that matters.”
Once again John’s voice is heard from across the expansive back lawn. 
“Shit, he’s coming. Peter, give me your gun. Nat,” she turns to the redhead, “I need you to get them to the car and find the boys. Get everyone out of here. He’s not going to stop until he has me and he won’t hesitate to hurt anyone who gets in his way.”
“No you’re fucking crazy if you think I’m letting you go alone,” she argues, refusing to accept her crazy plan. 
“I’m not asking, I’m ordering. No one else needs to get hurt. This is ending tonight,” she takes the gun from Peter’s hand before addressing the trembling girl in her arms, “Morgan, I need you to go with Peter.” 
Passing off the girl to Peter, she whispers into her ear, “I love you so much Mo Mo but you have to go with Peter and Nat. They’re going to get you to safety.”
Morgan tries to protest but stops when Doll gives her the mom look. She kisses her forehead and gives a curt nod to the boy holding her. 
“Go,” and with that Nat gives her an extremely pissed-off look before she and Peter take off with Morgan in his arms. 
“Oh, sweetheart where are you?” 
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” she says under her breath. She may not be able to see him but she can hear John’s footsteps and his shouting. 
“Come out, come out wherever you are.” 
The crunching of leaves and branches indicates that he’s only feet away from her now. 
“Found you.” 
The light from the house fire illuminates his body standing just a few feet from her. It’s seconds between when she spots him to when he’s running at her at full speed. She tries to turn and runs but he tackles her by the waist, landing on top of her on the hard ground. 
“Why’d you run from me? You know I’d never hurt you,” the lies sting like venom as he brushes her hair from her sweaty forehead. He rips the gun from her hand and throws it away them. Struggling under him, she tries her hardest to kick or push him off of her but his body weight and hands are pinning her to the ground. He won't budge an inch no matter how hard she fights in his grasp. 
“Stop fucking moving, sweetheart. You’re only going to make things worse,” he hisses into her ear, leaning fully against her chest to restrict her breathing. 
With no other choice, she does as he says and John smiles triumphantly as she stills. The hand that isn’t holding her wrist together grips her chin tightly so she’s forced to look at him. In the months that he has been tormenting her, his face has grown gaunt and stubble has spread across his once clean-shaven face. 
“If you had just fallen in love with me like I had planned, none of this would have happened. Mommy and Daddy would still be alive, Morgan would be safe, and we could’ve been so happy together but you just had to go and ruin it, didn’t you?”
“I know and I’m sorry baby. I was too caught up to see how good you were to me,” her lies slip 
like honey off her tongue as she attempts to convince him of her foolishness. 
“But you don’t know. Do you even realize how painful it was for me to watch you be paraded around by that pig?”
“I can’t even imagine it but I had to do it. My father didn’t give me a choice,” the more she lies, the loser his grip becomes. 
“Your father’s gone now. All we have to do is get rid of Barnes and we can be together,” he gets off of her but doesn’t release her and hauls her up by her wrists. John has her restrained against his chest as he continues, “I think you should be the one to do it. It would be a beautiful sight to see.”
“If you let go of me, I can make it up to you,” purring, she tries her best to look up at him through her lashes. 
“No,” he sneers at her as he reaches behind him and pulls out his gun. 
“But baby, I can’t do anything if you’re holding my hands together.”
“NO!” he screams into her face causing her to shrink in his grasp. When she does so, he rubs her hair with the gun, “don’t be scared, sweetheart. I won’t hurt you unless you deserve it.”
He starts off back towards the house, ripping her along with him and leaving her gun far behind them. As they walk back towards the burning house, tears threaten to fall as she thinks about the possibility that the boys never made it. Her mind is racing with thoughts of them and if Peter and Nat had made it to her car. She doesn’t notice that John has stopped walking and his sharp voice interrupts her thoughts, “Now why’d you have to go and do that?”
Confused, she looks up and over John’s shoulder, she finally spots the two black SUVs, doors wide open and voices streaming from them.  John, however, is less than pleased with this new development and has taken it upon himself to make his presence known. A loud shot fires off as he shoots at the SUVs. 
“Over here!”
Running footsteps and other commands become louder as they approach John and her. He quickly places her in front of himself and points his gun at her head. The tears start to flow freely when she sees the boys around the corner. They slow to a walk when they spot the duo, making sure to not make any sudden movements as if stalking prey. 
“Put the gun down,” Bucky demands, his own pointed at John. Sam is slowly side-stepping to his right while Steve moves to the left, blocking off any exits. 
“Sweetheart, why don’t you tell them to stand down?” He ignores Bucky, focusing only on her as he whispers threats into her ear. 
“I thought I got him back in the office but it seems like I was wrong. Maybe I should go for center mass this time, wound him so he can watch as I kill all of his buddies and then kill you. Hmm? What do you think of that?”
She starts sobbing even harder, knees buckling but John doesn’t let her fall, catching her by her throat. 
“Let her go,” Bucky’s deafening voice carries across the yard. 
“You don’t get to speak,” John yells back, shoving the gun even harder against her head and pulling his arm tighter across her neck. She chokes under the pressure, desperately clawing at his arm. 
Bucky goes to step forward however, Steve stops him, “He will shoot her if you get any closer.”
“He’s going to shoot her anyways.”
“You should listen to your friend there, Barnes. I will put a bullet in her if you take another step closer.”
“John, John, please. Please John,” she whimpers, drawing his focus back to her, “Please let me go and I promise I’ll go with you. Please, I’m begging you.”
He releases her just enough that she’s able to breathe again and falls forward to the ground, pulling him with her. The gun is knocked from his hand and she stumbles away from him as he attempts to catch himself. Scrambling forward on her knees, she snatches the gun as he grabs a hold of her ankle and jerks her backward. The men across from them are frozen, unsure of what to do because one wrong move could mean hurting her and that’s the last thing they want. 
Flipping onto her back, she points the gun at John and fires 3 times into his chest. His body drops onto hers, covering her in blood. Steve, Sam, and Bucky take off at the sound of the shots fired, coming to kneel by her within moments. She shakily drops the gun, sobbing even harder as she feebly pushes at the dead man’s body. Steve and Sam are the first ones she sees through her tears as they drag John off of her. A pair of hands manhandle her off the ground and into a warm embrace. 
“Doll, it's okay. I’m right here,” Bucky’s soothing voice is low in her ear as he holds her tightly against him, hands rubbing her back in an attempt to calm her down. Her shaking body shows no sign of slowing down and she grips the back of his tactile vest as she melts into him. The familiar and welcoming smell of his cologne engulfs her senses and his soft voice, reserved only for her, fills her. 
“Come on,” he urges her to walk away from the body but she knows her legs will fail her if she tries to move. Sensing this, he sweeps her into his arms and carries her towards the SUVs. As the house fire rages on, sirens and flashing lights fill the Stark driveway. The voices of first responders are muffled and she can’t make out what they’re saying, nor does she want to hear any of it 
She’s sat down on the edge of an ambulance and a shock blanket is wrapped around her shaking shoulders. His thumb brushes away the tears so she can clearly see him kneeling in front of her with a gentle smile. 
“Everything’s going to be okay, Doll. I’ll take care of everything,” he whispers to her before leaning down and kissing her knuckles right over her wedding ring. 
Morgan rips her hands from Peter and Nat’s hands in an adjacent ambulance and takes off toward her. Bucky hears the little girl coming and moves to the side so the two girls can be reunited. 
“Mo o,” Doll cries as she throws her arms around the little girl, “Oh my god, you’re okay. You’re okay.”
He stands again and hugs them both as they cry together. It’s over. It’s finally over. 
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Six months later
The funerals had all been a blur to the trio, no one truly remembering what happened only that there had been funerals. Morgan has a hard time adjusting to the smaller Barnes house and would cry almost every night for her parents. Doll had done all that she could to get the young girl help but to no avail. Most nights Morgan could crawl into their bed, sandwiching herself in between her guardians and the nights where she didn’t, Doll and Bucky took turns sleeping with her in her twin bed. It wasn’t the most comfortable arrangement however it was the only thing that provided her with safety and sleep.
Becoming parents overnight, the couple grew into their role as guardians for her younger sister and the family unit grew stronger. Being that she had worked as a therapist, Doll arranged weekly individual counseling sessions as well as family sessions for them to ensure that they would work together. She had thrown out the idea of going to couple’s counseling but it was already a massive win that Bucky had agreed to family and individual therapy so couples would have to wait.
In addition to becoming parents, they had also taken on Stark Industries. With her father and John gone, the damage control she had to do was enormous. Given that Stark Industries was a front for her father’s organized crime, she was faced with the decision to dissolve it or turn it legit. Vision had warned her that dissolving it wasn’t an option due to Morgan being the legal owner so Bucky and her set to work turning it into a legitimate company.
“You know turning Stark Industries into a private contractor is still a dirty business,” Bucky teases her while she’s working in her father’s old office.
“Are we selling drugs? Illegal weapons? Trafficking people?” She doesn’t bother to look up as she questions him.
“Extracting an asset could be considered trafficking.”
She closes her computer slightly, “is this complaining I hear?”
“Me complain? Never,” he chuckles as he stands around her desk and sits on the edge beside her.
She leans back in her chair, taking in the man before her, “Because I seem to remember that you used to do worse things than ‘extracting’ an asset. Murder I think is what they call it.”
“Murder or happy accident, they’re the same thing in our clientele’s eyes.”
“Except we don’t offer a happy accident service anymore.”
“That’s true indeed my love,” he leans down to give her a kiss.
“What time do we have to be at the party tonight?” she asks him as their lips part.
Checking his watch before recapturing her lips, “About an hour.”
“We need to go then,” she gently pushes against his chest as he tries to keep kissing her.
Groaning, he sits back on the desk and lets her stand up to collect her things. Hand in hand they leave Stark Towers to go to the party Nat had planned for their year anniversary.
Of course, they had expected the house to be teeming with people, waiting to celebrate with them however, this wasn’t the case. Flowers and candles line a pathway from the front door out to the garden with the table from their wedding day set up the same way. Morgan, Steve, Sam, and Nat are all standing by the fountain, anxiously awaiting their arrival. Bucky leads them out of the house and into the garden as she holds onto his arm, the group’s anxiety also filling her as she spots the gift she asked Nat to put out. His eyes are wandering around the garden and the table, taking in the love and appreciation that had been put into the scene before him. She feels him tense in her hands as his eyes land on the gift.
“What’s that about?” looking down at her, he says as he points to pale pink heart balloons on the table.
“Go look,” she lets go of him so he can get a better look at the box under the balloons. The group is practically jumping up and down in excitement watching him take the lid off and take in every detail the box has to offer.
Inside the little box is a small pearl necklace with a ‘B’ pendant and a pregnancy test. Gingerly lifting the test up, his hands begin to shake from the realization that it’s positive. After he drops the box and test on the table, he catches her in his arms as she’s running to him.
“Surprise, I’m pregnant!”
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lynnbeth5172 · 10 months
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Blacked Last Night
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Small spoilers for Saltburn considering it takes place after the events of the movie🙂
……………………………………………………………………………………………… Summer felt slightly longer than it should have, at least that was the case for Michael, truth be told he didn’t do much besides maybe staying in his room back at his parents house; his cousin paid a visit to their house, he looked slightly better than before. The bags under his eyes had lightened slightly and his smile looked less tired. He felt less alone when his cousin was around; he continued studying the whole of the summer. Though he was from a wealthy family, he didn’t go to the other rich parties or anything besides staying home. Sometimes he and his father would play a game of chess, he had gotten better though he still felt a sense of unhappiness. His mind kept wandering to Oliver Quick.
He was the only friend he had in Oxford, only having one friend in private school and losing them when they went to a different college.
Getting out of his car, he got his things from the trunk and began walking to the campus. Feeling someone’s eyes on him. He turned to see his old friend with a group of other posh people, talking to him as if they didn’t ignore him in their freshmen year of college. Being near him because he stayed at the Catton estate and was with them when Felix and Venetia Catton died, a small bit of anger flickered inside of him.
Fucking bootlicker.
Quickly moving into his dorm, he closed the door and put his bag of things on his bed. Michael clenched and unclenched his hand as his anger mixed with sadness, he now has no one. He tried ignoring that thought and took deep breaths.
It’s fine
He’s fine…
He’ll just be alone for another year of college with no friends, sitting on his bed and closing his eyes. He calmed himself enough to get off the bed and start packing away his things, putting his books on a shelf near his desk as he went back on his bed.
Looking out the window and down at the people who were chatting to their friends, he went to email his parents that he made it to school okay and was going to do well. He did so and didn’t expect an answer.
Michael laid his head on his desk and closed his eyes, another year with no mates to talk to or hang out with. He used to tell himself that he didn’t need them, that his wits were his friend and that he’d rather be alone. But now Michael had a small longing ache for a friend, Oliver used to be his friend but not anymore.
‘Norman No-Mates my ass’.
Deciding to go to the library to release some feeling, he looked back out the window again to see another car pull up.
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…………………………………………..
“Here we are.” Vivi flinched slightly as she heard her brother’s voice in the seat next to her, rubbing her eyes slightly as she closed then opened her eyes again. The ride had felt slightly shorter due to her feeling like she was barely there, dissociating in a way.
“Need any help?” Her brother tapped the steering wheel to the car and looked at her, she felt slightly safe in the car. It was just a small place where she didn’t have to worry about being around too many people.
“No John, I’m good.” She unbuckled her seatbelt and got out of the car to get her things, feeling a small wave of anxiety take over but suppressing herself from having a panic attack. As she got her things, she turned around to see her brother holding her pill bottle in his hand, she immediately grabbed it and muttered “Thank you” as she got her bags and held her bottle of pills in her hand. Playing with the label.
“Have fun…don’t be stupid.” Her brother, John, hugged her and gave her a bottle of water, likely to take with the pills.
Giving her brother a small smile, she walked onto campus and made her way to her dorm room. Not before stopping near somewhere to take two pills as prescribed by her doctor, as she walked to her dorm, she felt a small bit of calm. Slightly distracted by her thoughts, she felt herself bump into a shoulder. Looking up to see one of the wealthy students with someone she recognized, his face had become slightly stronger looking and his eyes were slightly piercing.
Looking down, she made it to her dorm. Closing her door immediately and dropping her stuff to the ground, rubbing her eyes as she began putting her stuff away. Hiding her pill bottle where her underwear was put; if someone had found out that she had been taking pills for her extreme anxiety…she didn’t want to imagine what they’d say, the students of Oxford already had their fair share of calling her “Weird” or “Scared girl”. She could only imagine the rich kids having another thing to dig at.
She knew she couldn’t be talking, she herself had come from an upper class background and had known some of the people at campus since they were kids. She remembered someone saying to a friend that their parent payed for them to be there and that they were accepted mainly cause of they bought their way in, or that their parents bought them into the school. Rather than actual intelligence.
Vivi didn’t know if she was as smart as some of the few people at the college, she could speak two languages and knew math well enough. Apparently not as brilliant as one of the students, Michael Gavey. Who she had learned had poked fun at her last semester when a new student came in, he was apparently Newton if he were alive again. As she finished putting her stuff away, she sat on the bed and waited for the sun to clear as she looked outside.
She found herself staring at the wall and she plotted a small idea to maybe go down to the Hall to eat slightly earlier so as to not be approached by anyone. Eventually she went to her bag and pulled out a yearbook for grades fifth to eighth, turning to see his face again.
On one of the pages she saw two people, while the girl was smiling. The other kid had a simple half smile on. As if nothing bothered him.
“Quick…”
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So…sorry if this is bad, I may have had to search up some things considering I was like five in 2006 so I don’t remember much🙂I am so sorry if this is bad.
Taglist: @bellaisasleep @liv-cole @annoyingkittydetective @arcielee @slytherincursebreaker @boundlessfantasy @sepherinaspoppies @zae5 @valeskafics
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bigassmoonchild · 1 year
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it is i again
since that anon with the crochet request gave me an idea
can we have the 141 reaction to wool stockpile
i once had over 350 spare balls of wool { down to like 50 now} and my current partner was concerned
tumblr didn’t delete any of it this time 🥳🥳. thank you so much for the request, i actually really enjoyed writing this!!
much love queen 🫶🫶
(the 141 and you are already dating bc i said so)
Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley:
it wasn’t often he was able to come by your home, considering you lived a bit further than he usually likes to drive after a mission. but there were a few times when he was able to, although he was still growing comfortable in the house. like a stray cat.
you’d been making some cookies, as simon had brought over some food he’d made earlier in the day. ‘hey si, can you grab me a new shirt? i got some egg on this one,’ you asked him, washing your hands after handling said eggs.
he gave you a little grunt of affirmation, standing and entering your room. in front of your dresser, he stood for a few moments contemplating which drawer your shirts were in.
opening the top, he was quick to close it after seeing a few lacy items. the next one down gave him a better look, but as he reached for one of the shirts he noticed something sticking out from under one.
picking up the shirt, he blinked a few times while staring at the balls of wool (or was it yarn?) that filled the entire drawer.
‘hey doll,’ he called down, leaning around the door frame. you gave him a hum, looking up front where you began putting the dough on the tray. ‘why do you ‘ave so much yarn?’
‘it’s wool,’ you answered, wiping your hands off on the towel nearby and walking to the room. ‘you weren’t really supposed to see all that,’ your face was flushed and you grabbed one of the shirts on top.
closing it, he looked around. ‘you’ve got anymore interesting things hidden around here?’ he asked you, beginning to dig through some drawers and the closet.
huffing a laugh, you smiled softly after changing shirts. god, he was a stray cat who was finally getting comfortable.
Captain John Price:
most days price was on leave, you would be over by his flat. most days price wasn’t on leave, you were over there. you’d been dating nearly a year at this point, and he’d finally asked you to move in.
he was helping pack up your essentials, taking some time to watch you tape up the boxes you’d already organized. he had taken care of the kitchen, finding any utensils he didn’t have and stashing them in a box.
you’d also needed him to just clear the top shelf.
by the time it was getting late, he was grabbing the last box left. the movers would be in for the rest of the bigger items the next day, but this box was oddly light for it’s size.
‘hey love, what’s in this one?’ he called out, dropping in front of the door. you had just come around from the bathroom, peeking at what he’d grabbed.
he saw your eyes widen and you moved quickly towards it. ‘hey, no, if this is in my flat i should know what’s in it,’ he pulled you into a tight hug and spun you around, stopping you from getting the box and listening to your laugh.
looking down at you, he gave a cheeky smile. ‘is it what i’m thinking it is?’ you pushed away from him, huffing at him. you stood as he pulled the tape off, rather excited at what he’d find.
‘oh,’ he sounded so sad as he looked upon the box full of wool. ‘that’s not as interesting as i thought,’ and he closed the box. it was embarrassing to you, having him see your stash like that.
he didn’t need to know about the small box you’d hidden in the box of bedding.
Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick:
the mission was a long one. tiring and grueling, all he wanted was to fall into bed next to you back in his apartment. when he came upon his door, he’d noticed a package waiting there.
thinking nothing of it, gaz brought it in and began to open it up before you’d come barreling out of the bedroom.
‘kyle!’ you shouted, lunging for a hug that he willingly pulled you into and swung you back and forth in his arms. pressing his head deep into your neck, he sighed heavily.
muffled by your hair and skin, he gave you a small greeting. ‘you order something?’ he huffed through your hair. you gave a little hum before looking upon the box and scrambling to grab it.
‘maybe,’ you whispered and nearly disappeared with the box, with how tired gaz was he didn’t think anything of it.
he always woke up before you, and allowed himself the pleasure of watching you sleep. he softly ran his fingers along your skin, feeling the warmth spread through him.
standing, gaz took a deep breath and ventured to the kitchen to make you a coffee. as he was making it, he caught the box out of the corner of his eye. sitting in the office.
carefully, to avoid waking you, he walked over to it and peeked inside. what he wasn’t expecting was a box filled past the brim with wool and yarn. pretty colors mixed together, the texture soft against his calloused hands.
he heard your footsteps grow closer. ‘i’m sorry,’ you whispered. ‘didn’t mean to order that much, didn’t notice until after they’d shipped it,’ you told him.
pulling you into a hug, he pressed a kiss to your temple. ‘y’can buy all the wool in the world and i wouldn’t think anything of it,’ you gave him a little laugh at that.
Johnny ‘Soap’ McTavish:
while you weren’t yet living together, he practically lived in your apartment. when he was on leave, your place was the first he would go to. ‘gotta make sure my girl knows when i’m available,’ he told you once when you’d asked.
one early morning, just before the sun was fully risen, he had been able to finally get away to come to you. he checked your mail, as per usual, before grabbing the large (but surprisingly light) box.
taking the stairs two at a time, he was able to unlock the door and walk in, greeting the little cat you’d adopted off the streets. dropping the box on the table, he kicked his boots off and walked in your room.
just watching for a few minutes, he admired how calm you looked. so, he climbed in and began pressing kisses against you, finally waking you.
‘hi, bug,’ you whispered softly. leaning up to give him a little kiss and lazily opening your eyes. he smiled at you, pressing one more kiss to your forehead before climbing back out of bed.
‘y’got a package, bug,’ he told you and you hummed, stretching along the bed. you met him in the main kitchen area, tugging the tape off of the box and throwing a few balls of wool on it.
and then more. and more. his brows furrowed, watching as you slowly dumped out each ball nearly one by one.
dropping the box off the table once it was done, you sat down and began organizing them into piles of colors. he watched on, slightly surprised but still adoring you as you moved.
he gestured to everything. ‘what’s all this for?’ he asked and watched as you blinked tiredly at him. you gave a little hum, rubbing your eyes softly.
‘j’s some projects i’ve got going on,’ you answered and began walking them into the art room. he followed suit, watching as you pulled a few baskets out of their spots and filled them with the colors.
johnny made a sound of surprise, looking at the amount you had. ‘christ, bug, i’d think you were hoarding them if i knew better,’ and you gave him a sleepy smile.
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supergirl000983 · 1 year
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The Rancher and the Pilot PT. 3 (maybe final)
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Pairings: Jake Seresin x Dutton!Reader
Warning: Language, fighting, Beth being a bad bitch, talk of past trauma.
Also in this Lee didn’t die because I said so!
Y/n looked at Jake with angry sad eyes “There is so much more to life than that Hell Jake.” She said as she began putting her clothes back on Jake following her actions. “What do you mean? I thought things on the ranch were getting better.” He questioned as he finished buckling his jeans. “They are, but now that daddy is governor we are under a heavy watchful eye. I mean Rip and I can’t even take someone to the fucking train station without being followed.” Y/n said frustrated pulling her boots back on. “Come on let’s head back inside before they realize we disappeared.” She said grabbing Jake’s hand and pulling him out of the truck. “Plus I already talked to daddy and he agreed it was time for me to get out of Montana for awhile. He also said that being with you in fighter-town would definitely be best.” Y/n said smiling causing Jake to smile knowing that this meant her father wasn’t going to kill him now that he knew. Jake laughed spinning her around. “Ok so does this mean you are coming back with us once leave is over?” Jake asked smiling his million dollar smile. “Yeah I already have some bags packed and I was given permission to take my ranch truck, I know how y’all feel about flying in planes y’all can’t control.” Y/n responded as she leaned up kissing Jake happily. They separated when they heard a fighting commotion come from inside right as Beth burst through the door holding a blonde woman by her hair. “Hey baby sister a little help in here?” Beth said before slamming the blonde’s face into the door then leaving her there and walking back in. The two followed and were surprised to see people trying to break up the fight going on in the middle. They weren’t still long as one woman ran up to attack Jake, but before she could Y/n grabbed her arm spinning her around and slamming her on her back and commenced to beating to fuck out of her. That was all she really remembered while she and Beth were both being put into the back of the police Tahoe. “So…what happened Bethie?” She questioned her big sister that practically raised her. “Some California bitch put her hands on Rip and then came over and told me that they were gonna leave and have some fun with or without me.” Beth said in a straight voice before looking at her sister and both of them laughing hysterically. “Nice hits by the way. Those girls didn’t know what to think when you started beating the shit out of their friend.” Beth said as they both finally calmed down. “Hey Bethie? How are we gonna explain this to Daddy?” Y/n said as she looked at her sister with all seriousness. “You don’t worry your pretty little head about that ok? I’ll take care of it and I’m sure Jaimie is already working on making this all disappear.” Beth said looking at her baby sister who wasn’t a baby anymore she was now a 30 year old woman that had seen a lot of shit in her time on earth. From being kidnapped, shot at, stabbed, and blown up. Beth really didn’t know how her sister was still alive. All she did know was that her sister was one strong motherfucker
After booking they were both put in a cell and made small talk with another woman in there. After a bit they were both bailed out and on their way back to the ranch. “I still can’t believe that happened and that bitch didn’t get arrested.” Beth said walking into the house meeting the eyes of several people including: the Aviators, some of the ranch hands, her other siblings, and their father. “Well why does everyone look so surprised to see us?” Y/n said as she took Jaimie’s whiskey out of his hand. She then walked back over to Beth. “If I remember correctly I made you both promise to stay out of trouble tonight.” John Dutton finally spoke he stood and walked over and stopped in-front of his daughters. Before smiling and walking away to his bedroom. Kayce then stood and walked to Y/N. “You had to date one of my best friends?” He said smiling at his younger sister. “What can I say? He’s the one for me Kayce.” She said looking up at her big brother. “Ok as long as you’re happy than I’m happy.” He said wrapping her in a hug.
“Actually before everyone goes to bed Jake and I have an announcement.” Y/n said as she held her hand out for Jake to hold as he came to stand beside her. “After tonight I will be stepping down as head cowboy. Rip congrats you get to boss these ass hats around.” She said as she smiled at her group of close friends and family that were all family at this point. “ What do you mean your stepping down?” Ryan asked sharing a confused look with Colby. “I mean I will no longer be able to run things for the ranch from fighter-town. I am going to take a least a year off and start my new life with Jake. Yes we will pop in for the Holidays, but I really need to get out of here for awhile.” Y/n said looking at one of her best friends. “I love you all. You guys will be fine without me. Rip is just as much of a hard-ass as I am if not more.” She said laughing poking fun at her brother-in-law who smiled at the comment.
————————Time Skip———————
The next morning they had everything packed into the truck. Everyone was saying their goodbyes. Y/n looked around knowing she was gonna miss her home in Montana. She also knew that it was time to move on. “Hey you ok?” Her father asked coming to lean on the truck beside her. “Yeah I’m just thinking about how nice it’s gonna be not to hear Lee snoring from the other side of the hallway, how I won’t have to hear Jaime bitch about everything, how I won’t accidentally walk in on Beth and Rip anymore, or Kayce and Monica for that matter.” She said looking looking at her father. John laughed and pulled his youngest child his absolute pride and joy into a bear hug. As they pulled back he handed her something. It was her mother’s necklace that her father had given their mother a few days before her death. “Dad…are you sure?” She asked looking up into her fathers eyes. “She would want you to have just as much as I want you to have it.” He said leaving no room to argue. She handed it to him and turned so he could clasp it for her. It was a simple necklace a thin gold chain with a ruby in the middle and tiny white diamonds surrounding it. After it was on she turned around and bear hugged her father again “Thank you for everything. There were times when you could have given up on all of us kids and you didn’t. So thank you daddy thank you so much.” Y/n said with tears in her eyes. All of the other Dutton children stood in a group watching the interaction knowing that after the youngest Dutton was gone he wouldn’t want to talk about it. Everyone finished their goodbyes and the group of aviators loaded into the truck and waited for Y/n to finish her group hug and goodbye with her siblings. After she was done she loaded up and looked at her boyfriend and his friends and smiled. “Alright…let’s head out. Goodbye Yellowstone, Hello Fighter-Town.” She said as they started the drive.
Trying to decide if I want to continue the story, or start a new one.
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Taking Comfort (In Your Arms) - Chapter 16
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December 1944
My dearest Addie, 
Merry Christmas, darling. Wishing more than anything I was by your side saying those words instead of being thousands of miles away from you. We got the best Christmas present we could’ve ever asked for - Red Cross parcels filled with food and chocolate. Sad to say I couldn’t ask for anything else, except maybe pulling you into my arms and kissing you senselessly. 
There’s more and more scuttlebutt of us moving out but it’s hard to believe what’s real or not. I promise you I’ll continue to write to you, no matter where I end up. 
I have a promise to uphold - I’m going to watch you walk down an aisle to me. Buck is going to be my best man and Elizabeth your maid of honor. I promise the three of us, along with DeMarco, Brady, and all the boys will make it home to you and the base. 
I love you with all my heart. 
Yours, 
John 
My dear John, 
Merry Christmas, handsome. I’ve got two years of presents to give you next time I see you - just something for you to look forward to. The kitchen has promised a Christmas feast for the ages - I just hope there’s some kind of real meat being served this year. 
We got our first dusting of snow - though I’m sure it’s nothing to the amount of snow you’d get back home in Wisconsin. Meatball had fun running through the snowy fields. Though, he didn’t quite enjoy the bath I had to give him afterwards. Actually, I didn’t enjoy that much either - him shaking in the middle of the bath isn’t my definition of a good time. 
I wish I could hear your voice and your arms wrapped around me in one of your comforting hugs. I don’t even care what we were arguing about before you went down - it’s in the past and something I’ve forgiven you for a long time ago. 
My Christmas wish this year? That you’ll come home this next year - I can’t take another year without at least seeing you. Here’s to hoping this one comes true. 
With all my love, 
Addie
February 3, 1945, 0630 Hours
She pulled John’s jacket tighter around her, trying to combat the freezing cold. Watching the puffs of air swirl in the cold morning breeze, she sighed. Waiting. That’s all she felt like she was doing those days. 
Watching Meatball running in the grass made her smile. At least someone was enjoying the cold. 
“You look grumpy. Also, good morning.” The cheerful voice called from behind her. 
Slowly turning, she glared at the voice before softening her look as he neared. “Good morning, Rosie. Why do you have to be so cheerful this early in the morning?”
“It’s going to be a good day, Addie.” He stopped, giving her a look before pulling her into a hug. “Did someone get up on the wrong side of the bed?”
Shaking her head, she sighed. “Waiting, Rosie. It just sucks and I’m in a mood. Doesn’t help you’re going back up today.” 
His arms tightened around her as she placed her head on his shoulder. A few more sighs escaped her mouth. “We’re so close to this war ending, Addie; closer than we have been in years. Hilter has a two-front war, the absolute last thing he wanted. You’ve had a hell of the last year and half but we’re nearing the finish line. Just hold on a bit longer. We’ll get our boys back and make sure John returns to you.” 
She gave him a hug before stepping away, running a hand through her hair. She smiled wearily. “Thanks Rosie.” 
“Anytime. Douglass and Blakely are both staying back today so if you need anything, go to them.” He spoke quietly, knowing he would soon need to head to the trucks. “Dinner when I get back?” 
“Of course, Rosie. I’ll save you a seat. Safe flying today.” She gave him a salute, which he wholeheartedly returned, pulling her into another hug. 
“Have a good day, Addie.” With one final nod, he headed to the truck, leaving her alone. Whistling, she got Meatball’s attention before heading into the warm tower. 
Pouring herself a cup of coffee, she took a seat at her desk, wishing more than anything that the day would go by quickly. 
Sixteen months of waiting and hoping that her boys would come home safe. 
1400 Hours
Hearing the familiar roar of the planes returning, she grinned knowing the entire base would be in great spirits. Jeffrey was already talking about how important that day’s mission was for both the boys on base and the Allies in general. 
Pushing away from her desk, she gave Josie a look, pulling on the now famous John Egan jacket. “I'm going to go greet Rosie outside of interrogation. You want to come?”
Nodding, Josie stood, prompting Meatball to join the girls as they made their way outside. Meatball ran ahead, greeting men as they jumped off the trucks, heading into interrogation. Cheerful greetings were given to her as she made her way towards the hut. 
Trying to get out of the cold wind, she buried her hands into her jacket as she bounced on her toes, trying to generate some heat. Her eyes scanned the airfield, smiling seeing it busy with crews and men. Seeing her brother walk out of the interrogation hut caused her to smile big. “Charlie! What are you doing in interrogation? Didn’t know they had pulled you in.”
“They called me in to hear something.” Charlie bit his lip, giving his sister a look. “You need to come with me, there’s something I need to tell you.” 
Not liking how that sounded, she silently followed Charlie as he led her to his classroom hut. Charlie nodded over her shoulder, as he held open the door. Josie followed behind the siblings, picking up Charlie’s mood. Whatever he was going to tell the girls wasn’t exactly good news. 
Picking up on his hesitancy, Addie leveled her brother, giving him a look. “Don’t beat around the bush and don’t try to spare my feelings. What’s going on?” 
Charlie sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked at his little sister. The sister that had already been dealt two difficult blows and he’s about to tell her something else that was going to devastate her. “The reason I was called into interrogation is because Rosie went down, somewhere east of Berlin. The boys reported 7 parachutes from his plane, so we have hope, but we just don’t know which side he was picked up by.” 
Stumbling back, the back of her legs knocked into a desk. Leaning on it, she breathed deeply, giving her brother a look. “Charlie, tell me it’s anyone else. But just not Rosie.” 
Pulling Addie into his arms, he ran his hand up and down her back. She placed her head on his shoulder, muttering to herself. “He was supposed to beat the odds and not get shot down. He’s done so many missions.” 
“God, Addie, I wish more than anything I wasn’t telling you this news.” Charlie whispered, tightening his arms around her. “The hope is that there were chutes, Addie. We have to hope that he was picked up by the Russians. Rosie’s smart, he’ll do everything he can to get back here.” 
Tears fell from her eyes. She didn’t know how much more heartache she could endure with those that she loved leaving her. Damn the Germans and damn this blasted war. 
My dear Adelaide,
I just realize I don’t often call you that and for that I apologize. I do love your full name. 
I’m writing to you to tell you we have marched. All I know is that we’re near Nuremberg. We marched for a day or so, stuffed us into a brickworks building for the night, then pushed us into train cars for the ride to Nuremberg.  
Addie, baby, I’m scared but I can’t show it. Buck and I have to be strong for the men - they look to us for leadership and while this is difficult, I can’t let them down, not now. But it’s hard and with the Germans not telling us anything, it’s hard to figure out where they’re taking us. I don’t know what lies ahead for us. 
God, Addie. All I wanted to do, since that October was get back to you.  And I don’t know if I’ll ever be home. Know that I’m doing all I can to get home to you, darling. I promise, no matter how many days I have left, that I’m fighting like hell to get home to you. 
I promise I’m coming home, Addie. Right back to you. 
With all my love, 
John
February 6, 1944, 0700 Hours
Sitting in the mess hall, she sipped her coffee, attempting to fight off a yawn. She hadn’t been sleeping well the last few days, Josie sat across from her fighting off the same sleepiness. 
Sighing grumpily, she swallowed a gulp of coffee, her eyes trailed around the somewhat busy mess hall. There was a mission going on that morning, but she was surprised by how busy it was. There were two tables up the way from her and Josie’s table filled with men happily joking and teasing each other. Usually, Addie and Josie would be seated at those tables but this morning, between the anxiety of waiting for news on Rosie and the sleepiness, her and Josie choose a quieter table away from the crowds. 
“This weather isn’t helping the want to crawl back into bed for the morning.” 
“No, it’s not.” Josie murmured, taking another sip of her coffee. “Are you doing anything important today or could you call off for the day?” 
Shrugging, she bit back another yawn. “Jeffrey is in London so the tower will be quiet. Though, apparently, we’re getting a big mail call so maybe it’ll just be a half day then I can attempt to get some sleep.” 
Whatever Josie was going to say was cut off by the door being thrown open with a pissed off Crosby walking towards Clouter and Blakely’s table. Josie’s eyes went wide as she looked over at Addie. Addie whistled quietly, knowing it was rare for Cros to be pissed off. She watched him stalk up to Clouter, hands on his hips with an angry look on his face. 
“I guess you’ve never flown over Germany without a parachute, huh?” Crosby attempted to catch his breath all while giving Clouter a look of disbelief. 
Clouter chuckled. “Well, I don’t know, Crosby. Have you?” 
What happened next caused both Josie and Addie to gasp. They watched Crosby slam Clouter’s head into his plate of bacon and eggs, holding his head down as he uttered, “Now from here on out, you’re going to keep that equipment hut opened and manned until wheels up plus 30 minutes. Yes, Major?” 
“Yes, Major.” 
Addie watched Crosby stalk out of the mess hut, as if he didn’t just punish someone. Her eyes trailed back to where Blakely was telling the boys to clean up and get a move on. Blakely watched the boys silently leave the mess hall before stopping at the girls’ table. “What was that about?”
“Your guess is as good as ours, Blakely.” Addie raised an eyebrow at him. “I’m guessing the crew didn’t have the equipment they needed to go up. You know Crosby as well as I do - he doesn’t get pissed off very often.” 
 Blakely nodded. “Can you go check up on him? I don’t think he’s doing too good.” 
“None of us are okay, Blakely.” Addie gave him a look. “We’re all on edge waiting for news of Rosie and the boys. But yes, I will finish up here then I’ll go check up on him.” 
Twenty minutes later, pushing back from the table, Addie gave Josie a tight smile before leaving her with two mugs of coffee in her hand. Making her way from the hut, she walked across the way towards the command center, Meatball on her heels. Pushing open the door, she made her way inside, cheerfully greeting everyone good morning, as she walked towards Crosby’s office. 
Setting the mug of coffee on his desk, she leaned against the door, raising an eyebrow. “Brought you some coffee. Want to clue me in on what happened earlier?” 
“Three men showed up at my door, letting me know the equipment hut was locked and they didn’t have parachutes.” Crosby took a long sip of coffee, before raising his eyes to meet hers. “That pissed me off because -” 
Addie cut him off before he could go any further. “You don’t have to say anything, Croz. That pisses me off too and I don’t even have to have you finish your thoughts. You definitely made your point. Blakely wanted me to come check up on you.” 
“I’m fine.” Crosby ran a hand through his hair, sighing loudly. “I called Bill earlier and he told me they still haven’t heard anything about Rosie or the crew.” 
It was Addie’s turn to sigh, shaking her head before taking a sip of her coffee. A cuss escaped her mouth as she was starting to believe, no news was good news in this case. 
“I don’t know how much longer I can hold on to hope, Croz.” Addie whispered softly, turning her sad eyes to him. 
Crosby stood, quickly shaking, taking her mug from her, placing it on the table. He pulled her into a gentle hug, her head dropping to his shoulder. “Don’t lose hope, Addie. It’ll be a sad day on base when that happens. You are helping us all keep going and if you lose hope, what does that say for the rest of us?”
“Croz, I can’t continue to say goodbye.” She whispered, tears falling down her face as she sniffled. “My heart can’t take another goodbye.” 
Crosby sighed. “Please just hold on a bit longer. Rosie is alive, I can feel it and he’ll be coming home to us soon.”
“God, I hope you’re right, Crosby.” She pulled back, wiping her eyes, sighing. “God, I hope you’re right.” 
Dear John, 
Sixteen months - that’s how long it’s been since I’ve hugged, kissed or seen you. I lost it with Crosby the other day - I’m glad you didn’t see the ugly cry I had but I somehow felt better afterwards. 
Rosie went down, John. He went down February 3rd somewhere east of Berlin. Seven chutes were reported but no idea who made it out or where they ended up. It sucks, John. I’m tired of saying goodbyes - I much prefer hellos, though I haven’t had the opportunity to say much of those. 
Anna made a stop on the base. Charlie and her are engaged (finally)! Charlie took her up in Daffodil and proposed to her after a joyride over East Anglia. They’ve promised to wait until you and Elizabeth are home but I've never seen my brother so happy.  Makes me have a bit of hope for the future. 
Tell the boys I send my regards and hellos. Stay warm, John. 
Sending you all my love. 
Addie
February 15, 1945, 1500 Hours
Throwing the tennis ball, she watched Meatball tear off after it. The afternoon had passed slowly, Jeffrey finally telling her to get out.  She knew she was just going through the motions, waiting for the day to end so she could crawl into bed and attempt to settle her mind. But with a thousand and one thoughts, she could never settle to get a good night's sleep. She ended up tossing and turning until another day began. 
Between Jeffrey, Josie, and Crosby, all three were mother henning her. Threats of the infirmary were common, which was the absolute last thing Addie wanted. Most nights she managed four hours of sleep, tossing and turning the other hours away. That past night she had somehow gotten six hours of sleep, and she felt the best she had in the 12 days since Rosie went down. 
Meatball returned to her, sitting at her feet. Reaching down, she grabbed the tennis ball from him before throwing it again. It was a rare sunny day, so most of the men were out and about, enjoying the sunshine and warmer temperatures. 
Hearing a door slam shut, she looked over to see Charlie and Red both leaving the tower. Meatball returned, happily panting as he dropped the ball at her feet. She grimaced, picking up the gross ball. Chucking it, she giggled watching him eagerly take off after it. 
“Addie!” Charlie cheerfully called out as he and Red made their way over to where she stood. “We just got a call from the guard station - Rosie’s back!” 
Her eyes went wide at Charlie’s cheerful call. “What? You’re not joking with me are you?” 
“No, the guard just called and said he was back. He should be pulling up any time.” 
Just as the words left his mouth, she heard the familiar roar of a jeep as it neared them. As it came closer, she saw who was sitting in the passenger seat. Instantly tears clouded her eyes as she saw him grinning as the men ran alongside the jeep. A hand flew to her mouth, a sob tearing from her mouth.  She saw his arm in a sling, but other than that he looked okay. 
Charlie watched his sister break down, more from relief than anger, he guessed. She fell to a crouch as more tears streamed down her face. Charlie stood by helplessly as he knew she had to process what she was feeling but he was glad to see one of her best friends return to base, the grin on his face evident by how Rosie was feeling too. 
As the jeep pulled to a stop, Rosie pushed through the crowd, crouching in front of Addie, reaching tentatively forward to place a hand on her shoulder. Looking up, she saw that it was him in front of him, another sob tearing from her mouth. Rosie chuckled, stood up, tugging her into his arms, hugging her. “I’m so sorry I made you worry, Addie. That was the only thing I was thinking of when I went down.” 
Laughing, she stepped back looking at him. She saw a cut on his cheek but other than that he looked to be safe. She threw her arms back around him, tugging him into another hug as she laughed, emotions all over the place at seeing him safe and sound. “Oh, Rosie, that doesn’t matter now. You’re back!” 
“It’s good to be back, Addie.” He chuckled alongside her, swaying her side to side. 
She pulled back, swiping at her eyes. “God, I’m a mess. But you came back.” 
“I told you I would.” He chuckled. “Shall we have that dinner I promised you 12 days ago?” 
Laughing again, Addie nodded. “We shall, then you’ll tell me what happened over the last 12 days?”
“Of course, Addie. Let me say hello to the men then we’ll go grab dinner.” He promised, stepping away to greet everyone. 
Addie stood off to the side, Meatball by her side, watching proudly. Hellos were much preferred, but her heart stilled. There were three hellos that she wished more than anything she could make - she just had to hold on for a bit longer. 
“Ready?” Rosie stood to the side of her, offering his arm to her. 
Slipping her arm into his, Rosie led her towards the mess hall. Addie smiled, feeling the breeze ruffle her hair. “Good to be back, Rosie?”
“You have no idea, Addie.” He smiled, opening the door to the mess for her, motioning her to head inside. Walking down the aisle, she found an empty table near the back, taking a seat. She smiled, watching Rosie get stopped by the men as they welcomed him back. 
Twenty minutes later, Rosie finally joined her at the table with a grin on his face. “Don’t let me keep you from your fanclub, Rosie.”
He laughed, shaking his head. “Can’t help that everyone wants to welcome me back. Sorry to keep you waiting, though.” 
“They love you, Rosie.” She grinned. “It’s alright. Now tell me about the last few days. Who ended up picking you up?” 
Plates were placed in front of them, Rosie took a quick bite before meeting her eyes. “Russians picked me up as soon as I fell. They set my arm, cleaned me up and got me on a transport to Poland. Let’s just say that whatever the Germans have coming for them, they have it coming.  The things they did, I’ll spare you the horrors Addie.” 
“They will pay, Rosie. The Allies will make them pay.” She murmured, concerned at his attitude. “What can I do, Rosie?” 
He gave her a half smile. “Just sit here with me. Help me remember I’m back, safe and sound.” 
“Done.” She motioned to his plate. “Eat some of that - don’t want your mother yelling at me because I let her baby boy get too skinny.” 
He laughed at that. “God, you meeting my mother. That’ll be the day.” 
“I look forward to it, Rosie.” She chuckled. “You’ll have to meet my father, next time he’s on base. You’ll meet my sister eventually when she gets back. The whole damn family, Rosie. Looking forward to that day.” 
“Same, Addie, same.” He grinned at her, taking a sip of his coffee, sitting easy in his chair. 
Addie smiled. “It sure is good to have you back, Rosie.” 
April 2, 1945, 0900 Hours
Sitting at her desk, Addie shuffled through some papers, looking for something Jeffrey had requested. The slamming of the door caught her attention as she watched Crosby, Red, and Kidd come marching in, a mix of determination and excitement on all of their faces. “Addie, come with us please.” 
Eyes wide, she looked over at Josie, who returned her gaze with her own wide eyes. Pushing away from her desk, she hastily grabbed a pad of paper and a pen before following the men into Jeffrey’s office. 
Jeffrey sat at his desk, reading a piece of paper that she watched Crosby hand him as his eyes widened. “When did you receive this?” 
“Ten minutes ago. Told Red and Kidd and we knew you needed to be aware.” Crosby said, running a hand through his hair, a grin tugging on his lips. “Haven’t even told Addie yet.” 
Looking between the men, she stood tall, not sure why she was even in the room. “Do you need me to take notes on something?” 
“No, we will need you to take a B-17 and do a pick up in Paris.” Jeffrey said, giving her a look. “Do you think you can do that?” 
Addie looked at Jeffrey, mildly amused. “Sir, I don’t know if you know but I can’t exactly go ferry a plane with the ATAs. I’m kinda on their shit list, sir.” 
Jeffrey chuckled at her deadpan explanation. “I’m well aware of what you can and cannot do, Captain Baker. However, this isn’t ATA business.” Jeffrey looked between Addie and the other men in the room. “This is Air Force business and you’re a qualified pilot to go make this run.” 
Not understanding him, Addie tilted her head, puzzlement clearly on her face. She never did have a great poker face. “With all due respect, sir, Kidd is a qualified pilot who could easily do this run. Why me?” 
“This mission is more personal to you rather than Kidd, though I’m sure he will be your co-pilot if you wish.” Jeffrey smiled, looking between her and Kidd. 
Frustration coursed through her. She was blatantly missing something, the other four were clued into. “Will you quit beating around the bush and tell me what this mission is? I feel like I’m missing something.” 
Jeffrey set the piece of paper on the desk, folding his hand, leaning back in his chair to look at Addie. “Gale Cleven escaped from a night march a few weeks ago and managed to run into some American troops and he needs to be picked up. We figured he’d appreciate a familiar face picking him up. Are you up for the flight?” 
“He escaped?” She gasped, immediate tears lining the corners of her eyes. “Any word on the others?” 
Crosby shook his head. “We didn’t hear anything about anyone else. Just Buck - he and another escapee ran into American forces in Germany. They flew him to Paris, did a full checkup on him then we got the call a bit ago.”
“When can I go get him?” Addie asked, biting her lip, attempting to keep the tears of relief from falling.  As happy as she was for Buck’s escape, she still worried about Bucky and him staying behind. 
Looks were exchanged between Jeffrey, Crosby, Red, and Kidd before Jeffrey looked at her. “Wheels up in an hour - you’re going straight to Paris, landing at the base, then coming straight back here - no stops. There and back. You’ll be on the ground for less than an hour, but you know what to bring, just in case. Bring your flight book and your ATA stuff.” 
“Yes sir. Can I go by myself?” She asked, looking between the men. “I’ll have a co-pilot on the way back.” 
Jeffrey gave her a long look. “You sure you don’t want someone to go with you? I’ll give the Paris base a heads up but not sure how they’re going to react with a female pilot landing on their base.” 
“It wouldn’t be the worst place I’ve landed.” She smirked, shaking her head. “Give them the heads up and I’ll go get my things. If they give you a hard time, let me know and I’ll bring someone. But if they don’t, then I go by myself.” 
“I will meet you on the hard stand and will let you know what they say.” Jeffrey gave her a look as she quickly saluted. 
Without another word, she turned and headed out of Jeffrey’s office. Stopping by Josie’s desk, she let the tears that she had held back finally fall. Collapsing into Josie’s arms, she cried for a few minutes. “Buck escaped, Josie. I’m going to Paris to pick him up and bring him home.” 
“He did?” Josie gasped, hugging her friend tighter. “Any word on anyone else?” 
Shaking her head, Addie sighed. “Just Buck made the escape. Jeffrey is calling the Paris base to let them know I’m coming. If they don’t protest, I get to go by myself to get him. If they complain, I’ve got to take a co-pilot with me. “ 
“Promise me you’ll be safe - we’re so close Addie.” Josie whispered, hugging her tighter. 
Nodding, Addie promised. “I’ve got to go get my things. Will you get Charlie out to the hardstand - if I have to take a co-pilot, I want it to be him, rather than anyone else.” 
Walking out of the tower behind her, Josie promised she would get Charlie before the two walked different ways.  Addie quickly grabbed her gear, luckily never unpacked it from her last unexpected mission before walking out, Meatball by her side. “Wish you could go with us buddy, but I’ll be back before you know it. Josie will watch you while I’m gone.” 
Taking her time to walk out to the hard stand, she felt a few different emotions. On one hand, she was happy that Buck was making his way home. But at the same time, her heart hurt that Bucky didn’t get to make the escape with his best friend. She was worried how he was holding up without Buck by his side. 
Sighing, she crouched down, giving Meatball pats and scratches. Kissing his head, she gave him a few more scratches, standing up with a smile before continuing her way to the hard stand. Stopping to Jeffrey’s left, she gave him a look. “I’m guessing the French aren’t happy with a female pilot?” 
“Unfortunately, they will probably make a fuss so pick someone to be your co-pilot, at least.” Jeffrey gave her a look. “We don’t want to cause trouble, especially when it could come back on you and Buck.” 
Addie groaned but nodded. “I want Charlie to come with me - can you spare him for a few hours?” 
“The boys will be glad to have the morning off. Does he know you want him to tag along?” Jeffrey asked, as she started doing her preflight checks on the B-17 in front of her “Mike”. 
“Josie was going to grab him as I gathered my stuff.” She smirked. “She may or may not have told him what she needed him for. I’ll make sure he’s aware before we take off.” 
Jeffrey laughed, shaking his head. “You know, I shouldn’t let siblings fly together but hell, you two would probably take off regardless of what I say.” 
“That may or may not happen, but you’re probably right.” She smirked, watching Josie and Charlie make their way to the hard stand.  “About time you got here.” 
Charlie gave her a look. “All Josie told me is that you’re flying to Paris and might need a co-pilot.” 
Addie smirked at Jeffrey’s. “See he’s all caught up - can we head out now?” 
“Go for it - make sure he knows what’s going on before you touch down in Paris.” Jeffrey gave the two of them a look. “Remember, no more than an hour on the ground.” 
Addie and Charlie both saluted before they made their way into the B-17 to finish pre-flight checks. Addie took the pilot’s seat, leaving the co-pilot’s seat to her brother. Final checks were quickly done before Addie radioed the tower for take-off instructions. 
Soon, the B-17 was airbound, Addie grinning at her brother. “So why are we heading to Paris?” 
“Buck escaped on a night march and ended up in Paris. We’re going to pick him up and bring him home.” Addie sighed, running a hand through her hair. 
Charlie looked over at his sister, that sigh was a bit heavy. “You doing okay?” 
“Glad Buck made the escape but sad John and Elizabeth are still POWs.” She grimaced. “Just wish it was them that we were going to pick up too. It’s been too damn long since I’ve seen him - almost a year and a half.” 
Charlie nodded, not even attempting to comprehend what his sister was feeling. “I wish I could tell you the war is almost over but only the damn Germans know that. But it has to be coming to an end eventually.” 
“We can only hope.” She whispered, watching the landscape change as they flew over the channel into French soil. 
Charlie stayed quiet, obeying Addie’s commands as she kept an eye on their altitude and distance. “We’re nearing Paris - can you radio into the tower for landing instructions?” 
She heard Charlie call over, asking for the instructions, which were quickly relayed back to them. Before long, the wheels were down and the plane landed with a gentle bump. Taxiing down the runway, she guided the plane onto a hard stand, nearest to the huts. Turning off the engines, she radioed the tower, letting them know who they were there to pick up. The tower radioed back that a jeep would be out there soon with the man. 
“You staying up here or coming out?” Addie asked, unbuckling with a big grin on her face. 
Charlie shook his head. “You go greet him. I’ll stay up here and let you bombard him.” 
With a mock salute, she made her way through the belly before swinging out. Dropping out of the hatch, she caught her balance before watching a jeep make its way from one of the huts onto the runway.  Tears welled up in her eyes as she watched it come closer to her. Eighteen months without one of her best friends and suddenly, he was mere feet away from her. 
The jeep’s brakes squealed as it came to a stop, but Addie didn’t mind that. Her eyes had landed on Buck Cleven - a sight for sore eyes. “Gale Cleven!” 
His head snapped up hearing his voice, looking up to see a crying, grinning Addie standing near the plane. Hopping out of the jeep, he quickly thanked his driver before making his way over to the plane. He quickly pulled Addie into a strong hug, tears flowing from both of their eyes. “You’re a sight for sore eyes, Addie.”
“So are you, Buck.” She hugged him back tightly. “Almost, welcome home. It’s good to see you.” 
Buck sighed. “It’s weird to be back. I’m sorry Bucky wasn’t able to make the run with me.” 
“He okay?” She asked, running her pointer finger under her cheeks, attempting to catch the tears that had fallen. 
Buck pulled back, looking at his best friend’s girl. “He was the last one, insisting I go first. A German soldier caught him, just as he was about to make the run. He yelled at me to go, leaving him behind. God, Addie, I wish it was him standing here instead of me.” 
“He would say the same thing, if he was standing here.” She gave him a long look. “I’m glad you are safe and sound, Buck. Ready to head back to Thorpe?” 
He sighed, a sad smile on his face. “I guess you’re my pilot home?” 
“You guessed right - so much for never flying with me again.” She teased, giggling, watching Buck’s eyes go wide. “It’s a big bird so I can’t barrel roll it. Besides, Charlie is up in the yolk so he’ll keep me on the straight and narrow.” 
Buck laughed, shaking his head. “Thank goodness for Charlie keeping you in line.” 
“Hey, Addie?” Pausing, she heard the hesitation in his voice. Turning, she gave him a look as he held a piece of paper out to her. “From John. He gave it to me when we first started marching, just in case something happened, or he wasn’t able to escape with us. He wanted me to have something to give to you.” 
A few more tears fell, as she accepted the paper. Tucking it into John’s jacket, she smiled. “Thank you, Buck. Let’s get you home.” 
She motioned him to go up as she walked around the plane, inspecting it for pre-flight checks. Before long she was in the belly of the plane, hearing Charlie and Buck talk. “Do you two want to fly us home? I’m perfectly fine being a passenger princess.” 
“Addie, get your butt up here. Buck and I were just catching up.” Charlie called back as she made her way up to the cockpit. “Buck, where are you going to hang out?” 
“Navigator’s desk. Never been down here during a flight.” Buck replied as Addie snickered. 
Charlie gave his sister a look. “Buck’s been a pilot since day one. When would he have been down in the nose?”
“She’s not wrong.” Buck chuckled as Addie started up the engines. 
Before long they were airborne, Buck asking questions about the base and what life had been like since they were away. “Wait, Buck, how’s Elizabeth doing? Did she attempt the run with you?” 
“We tried to get her to run with us but there's a few men she was looking after that had pretty serious injuries. She refused to leave them.” She could hear the grin in the Major’s voice. 
“Gale, what aren’t you telling us?” Addie asked, eyes scanning the horizon as she attempted to pull the details from one of her best friends. 
Buck laughed. “It’s all good - I promise. We don’t know much but pretty sure your sister is sweet on Brady. Those two were thick as thieves in the stalag and they spent a lot of time together.” 
“Brady, huh? Didn’t see that one coming.” Addie mused. “How was she otherwise?” 
Buck sighed. “Much like you, Addie, always positive and happy go lucky. Rarely did I not see a smile on her face. She always brightened our spirits and checked in on us daily. Most of the guys wouldn’t have made it through that ordeal without her.”
Sighing, she shook her head. “Well, we’re happy you’re back Buck. There may be a welcoming crew waiting for you on the tarmac when we return.” 
“What did you do, Addie?” 
Feigning innocence, Addie chuckled. “I didn’t do a thing, Buck.” 
“Don’t let her fool you, she wouldn’t stop telling people you were coming home. And she only had an hour between when she found out and when we flew out.” Charlie chuckled. 
Addie smacked her brother’s shoulder, chuckling. “It’s the returning of men that makes this whole idea of war worth it. Don’t fault me for being excited that after 18 months, Buck is back with us, safe and sound.”
She paused, knowing she would have to ask about one other man, just for the sake of her friend. “Buck, how’s DeMarco? You know he’s been writing to Josie but if anything happened to him, can you tell me?”
“DeMarco is fine, Addie or at least he was when I left. He was with Alex and Macon when I left. I know they were planning their own escape but I don’t know if they even attempted.” Buck replied back with a wearily sigh. 
Nodding, there wasn’t anything else she could say. Looking over at Charlie, she smiled sadly. “Can you radio to the tower for landing instructions?” 
Soon enough, they were on the ground, pulling the B-17 onto a hard stand, shutting off the engine. “Go on Buck, it’s you they want to see, not us.” 
“I highly doubt that, Addie.” Buck laughed but she heard the hatch open as she completed her landing checklist. 
Soon, she made her way out of the plane to see Buck surrounded by men as they welcomed him back. Charlie dropped down beside her with a chuckle. “Good to see him back on base.” 
“You don’t know how good, Charlie.” She sighed. “Gives me hope for John and Elizabeth to return.” 
2030 Hours 
Leaving the Officer’s Club, with Meatball by her side, she felt the crinkle of the paper in her coat pocket. In all the excitement, she had forgotten the letter that Buck had given her before they returned to England. 
Making her way onto the tarmac and the lone fort that was sitting there, she stumbled on the uneven terrain before collapsing against the wheel. It was still light enough that she could make out the messy handwriting on the paper in front of her. Meatball laid down beside her, his head on her lap, sighing as she felt him relax. 
My darling Adelaide, 
If you’re reading this, that means Buck made the escape and he’s back in Thorpe by your side. I’m sorry, darling, I didn’t make the escape with Buck. But I’m happy he’s safe and back with you. 
Addie, take care of yourself, please? Tell me something funny - I cannot wait to hear all the stories that you couldn’t put into writing. We have a lot of catching up to do when I get back - you’ll probably talk my ear off with all the news. And honestly, I cannot wait. Spending time in our field, just the two of us, catching up sounds like a pretty good way to spend a few hours. 
I’m not sure where we are but the men are safe and sound. We march for about 8 hours a day. Rest before doing night marches. I think the Germans want to stay ahead of the Allies so night marches are more common than we want them to be. We’re being gunned down by our own forces. 
I hope the ending is near. And if that’s the case, I cannot wait to be back in your arms. Counting down the days until I get to see you again. 
Love you always and forever, 
John
Leaning against the wheel, she sighed, tucking the paper back into her jacket. Carting her hand through Meatball’s fur, trying to calm herself down. Closing her eyes, she let her head fall against the wheel. Her heart hurt for Bucky - he lost his best friend when Buck successfully got out, leaving him behind. Addie knew how close the two were but for Bucky to be left behind, trying to be a leader for his men, despite the unknown. She couldn’t imagine how much he was hurting and scared. Despite not making the run with Buck, he attempted to be upbeat in his letter to her. How much of a brave face had he put on for the men while he was scared himself? She wishes she could just wrap him up in her arms and hug him close. 
Soon, she vowed. Soon they would be reunited and she wouldn’t let him out of her sights any time soon. 
Hearing footsteps on the tarmac caused her to open her eyes. She pushed a smile forward as Meatball pushed off her to go greet the man walking closer to her. Watching the dog and man walk closer to her, she pushed herself to her feet. “Thought I’d find you out here - could never get too far away from the Big Birds, huh, Addie?” 
“Nothing’s changed, Buck.” She grinned as he shook his head, sighing. 
“Everything’s changed, Addie.” He gave her a look, scratching his jaw. 
Nodding, she bit her lip, scanning his face for any distress or worry. “As much as I wish it didn’t, time keeps moving on. How are you, Buck? Truly.” 
“It’s weird being back - everything about me has changed. But yet the base is the same, or at least looks the same.” He scanned the area surrounding them. “But part of me feels left behind, I should still be with Bucky and the boys.” 
Addie’s heart broke for him. “Buck, you know as well as I do that Bucky would have wanted you here, where you’re supposed to be. I’m sure it was hard to leave him behind but you got out. Now, talk to me - about anything or nothing in particular, but you have that look on your face that you need to talk.” 
“If we’re going to talk, then we need to be somewhere warm and sitting down.” Buck gave her a look, smiling slightly. 
Addie chuckled. “Luckily, I know just the place and we won’t be interrupted. C’mon.” 
Throwing an arm around his waist, Buck threw his arm around her shoulder, tugging her close. The two, with Meatball trailing behind them, walked over to the mess hut. Just as Addie predicted, it was quiet when she threw open the door and motioned him to go in.  They found a table near the back before settling in.
Smiling at the waiter, Addie quietly asked for two mugs of coffee, which were quickly deposited on the table as Addie gave Buck a look. “It’s just me and you - whatever you want to talk about.” 
“Did Lemmons tell you anything about the day that DeMarco and I went down?” Buck started, taking a sip of coffee. 
Nodding, Addie cupped her hands around the mug. “John and I weren’t talking after we returned from London. He wasn’t speaking to me, focused on going up and avenging you going down. Lemmons found us asleep in John’s fort and pulled me aside to tell me it was a magneto issue and that he had to ride the wheel to fix it. He needed reassurance that wasn’t the reason you went down.” 
“I spoke with him this afternoon and made sure he knew it wasn’t. It was the damn flak that blew two engines and we went down. I ended up with a pitchfork to my neck as a farmer wasn’t too keen that I flew in through his backdoor.” Buck explained with a laugh. 
He went on to talk about being picked up by the Germans and the interrogation that followed. “He knew almost everything about me - as if he was reading my personnel file. He knew about Bucky and your name was brought up too. I had to remind myself to keep my anger in check. After I kept repeating my name, rank, and serial number, they soon got tired of me and threw me back in my cell. Woke us up in the middle of the night and marched us to the Stalag. I was the first of the boys to show up. Few days later, DeMarco shows up along with a few of the other boys. About a week after that, John shows up with a busted eye and ribs. Never have I been so relieved to see him, despite wishing he was far, far away from that place. We were separated for four months before they threw me into his bunk with the rest of the boys.” 
Taking a deep breath, he sighed, taking another sip of coffee. “It was about 6 months after that when Elizabeth showed up to camp. I had seen her come into camp and told Bucky. At first he thought it was you that we were talking about until I mentioned that it was Elizabeth. We all took her under our wing and made sure she was okay. Her and Bucky immediately got along - almost a bit too well. Within an hour of her being in the bunk, she slugged him for proposing to you in a letter.” 
Addie smiled sadly. “As much as it hurt for you all to be away, I was glad you all had one another, instead of being alone.”
“You weren’t far from our thoughts at any time.” Buck whispered. “Your letters kept us and the other guys going. With not a lot to keep us occupied, we looked forward to mail day - always loved hearing about the coming and going of the base, including what Meatball was up to.”
She chuckled. “I always hated getting your letters as much of it would be crossed out by the sensors - always had to attempt to piece together what you all were talking about. I still don’t know what much of it means but as long as the letters kept coming, I didn’t care. That meant you all were safe.” 
Reaching over, Buck grabbed her hand, giving it a squeeze. “I can’t thank you enough for writing Marge - that meant more to me than you’ll ever know, Addie.” 
“I figured I was one of a handful of people who knew what she was feeling.” Addie squeezed his hand back. “We’re friends now so there’s no hope for you or John. She’s a sweetheart and she’s lucky to have you, Gale. Did you get the chance to send her a telegram?” 
Shaking his head, Buck sighed. “Not yet. I’ll do that tomorrow morning. What should I tell her?” 
“That you’re safe and back at Thorpe’s. That’s all she’s been waiting to hear.” Addie bit her lip. “That’s all we’ve been waiting to hear for 18 months, Buck. Maybe, tell her you love her too, that might be a good thing too.” 
Buck laughed. “Thank you, Addie.” 
“For what?” 
“For keeping the hope alive that we’d make it. For writing to us, Marge. For coming to pick me up.” Buck raised an eyebrow. “For everything.” 
Sighing, she ran a hand through her hair. “It was what kept me going. Knowing that I need to keep you updated on everything going on here, well as much as I could tell you. Now we just need to wait for Elizabeth and John to come home, then all will be right in the world.” 
Pushing back from the table, a yawn escaped his mouth. She stood, slapping her thigh to gain Meatball’s attention. “Oh, one more thing that Bucky made me promise to tell you.” 
She stopped, raising an eyebrow at him. “He told me that he can’t wait to see you in a white dress. He also told me to give you a giant hug from him.” 
And with that, he tugged her into a hug, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, with a gentle squeeze. “He’ll be back soon, Addie, and all this crap would have been worth it.” 
“Holding you to that, Buck.” She smiled, her heart somewhat lighter with his words and hug. 
8,000+ words and chapter 16 is posted. Please let me know what you think. We are almost to the end. I'm planning on positing extra tidbits that had to be cut or I didn't end up using after the story is done. If there's something you'd like to see, just send me a message or leave a comment. Feedback would be much appreciated.
Chapter 17
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Note
I see we'll are very sad to not be on a boat with Matty and honestly I feel for all of us because we deserve it but think how annoying it would be to remind him constantly to put on sun screen? And have him saying: baby, I'm a man I don't burn that easily...
(unrelated but yesterday a used a new sunscreen and I must have been allergic to it because it gave me such a bad reaction to my eyes while I was at the pool. I was miserable)
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Sunshine Baby
@heralldaylong ‘s request for a summer vacation one shot was perfect for this. So here you guys go.
warnings: none. Maybe some mentions of past trauma but kept it super vague
———
She closed her book and set it down in her lap at the end of the 7th chapter. She pushed her sunglasses off her face and into her hair , and unfolded her crossed legs over the sun-lounger. Over the railing of the boat, the sun glitter shimmering over the surface of the ocean brought a smile to her face. Closing her eyes and letting the gentle warmth of the atmosphere flow through her, she listened to the soft chatter from around the corner. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach at the realization that she could pick out Matty’s voice, and his sweet giggle, from the medley of voices on the other side of the deck. She sat up over the edge of the sun lounger, dropping her feet to the floor. On the side table, her ice-cold beverage had a few sips left in it. She picked it up, watching the circle of condensation that had formed at the base of the glass slip off the table. Then she reached for the bottle of sunscreen and set her book down in its place.
on the Deck, Gabi looked like she had fallen asleep in her seat next to John as he and Polly giggled at whatever private conversation they seemed to be having. Across from them, Ross smiled and shook his head, the wind. Blowing through his hair. She couldn’t quite hear him, but he was responding to what Matty, and the boys’ two trainer, Ben, and Alex, were saying. If she had to guess, they were probably attempting to entice Ross into a swimming competition, and judging by Ross’s self-assured smile, they were failing.
Matty sat closest to the edge, remarkably, his phone was nowhere in sight. The shirt that had been loosely draped over his upper body when she left him not too long ago was now on the seat next to him, leaving his back and chest completely exposed. he looked at peace for the first time in a long time. She never thought that someone else’s quiet contentment could bring her so much joy, but watching him run himself ragged day in and day out had been difficult. While she was nothing but proud of him, she’d been worried he’d burn himself out.
That worry, in itself, was a privilege, she’d decided. in her past relationship, she never felt connected enough to her partner to have such a concern for him. The fact that she was not only a part of Matty’s life, but also of his friends’ lives, overwhelmed her sometimes. It took moments like this, of quiet reflection, of almost stumbling upon a scene from a movie unfolding before her eyes, for her to realize how lucky she’d gotten.
she walked across the deck, swinging her arm around Matty’s shoulder when she got to him. “Hey, you.” She kissed the side of his head. a massive smile spread across his face when he felt her, “hi, Angel.” He kissed her lips. “How’s my favorite introvert feeling? You get a little me time?”
she smiled, nodding and squeezing a bit of sunscreen onto her hands. “good, cuz it’s Matty time now.”
she rolled her eyes. “That might work on thousands of adoring fans, but it doesn’t work on me.”
“what about it I wink when I say it?”
she placed her SPF covered hands on his neck.
“Mate- what? It hasn’t even been 40 minutes since you put the last round on my face!”
“well, mate, I didn’t get your shoulders and back. Cuz you were dressed. But since you’ve decided to expose the rest of your body, now we gotta get that, too.”
Matty shrugged, “whatever. I’m going in the water soon, anyway.”
“oh, ok then let me go get the swimming one-“ she moved to walk away from him but Matty instantly caught a hold of her hand, pulling her back to him.
“Don’t- go- or get anything. Stay with me for a moment, would you? Come- over here. Sit in my lap I wanna show you something. No-“ he laughed when she gave him a raised eyebrow. “I’m not being- I’m not trying to be cheeky or whatever- you just won’t see it from over there.” She relented, letting him pull her by the waist and set her down in his lap. Matty leaned them both over the railing and pointed down at the water. “Look! We’ve got company.”
“oh my god, dolphins!” She squealed. The pure joy and surprise in her voice almost made Matty’s heart implode in his chest. He kissed her cheek as she watched the dolphins swim along the side of the boat. “They’re following us.” She mumbled. Ross happened to glance in their direction and noticed them having a small moment of privacy. He took his phone out, snapping a picture as of them as Matty began to sway his hips and placed a kiss on her cheek again.
“Well, Matty.” Alex tapped his shoulder. “Your friend won’t listen to reason.” His head nodded towards Ross who was too busy texting the photos he’d taken to their group chat to notice his friends conspiring. “we've gotta do it then.” Matty whispered.
“What, do what? What’re you guys talking about?”
Matty grinned. “You’ll see.” He tapped her hips gently and stood up when she got off of his lap.
she watched as Alex and Matty exchanged a look, then went over to Ben and Waugh, whispering conspiratorially.
they all gathered around Ross’s side of the deck, forming a smal line with Matty in the front, Ross behind him, and everyone else behind Ross. “what’re you doing?” She yelled out as Matty stood over the edge of the deck smiling. “count to three?” Ben alerted over Ross’s shoulder. “Matty’s never been good at counting down to stuff”
she mumbled to herself, not that anyone could hear her anyway.
before Ben could count them down all the way, matty had already grabbed Ross by the arms and pulled them both into the ocean. Alex, Ben, and Waugh all followed behind.
the girls on deck were sure they could hear Ross inventing new profanities as he cursed out Matty, but the sound of the ocean waves splattering over the side of the boat, and the boys roaring laughter left little for them to hear.
“alright! Listen to me! You’re in the water now. Might as well do it.” Matty directed everyone’s attention. “First one to pop his head out of the water loses, okay? Polly’s gonna time us” he raised a thumb up to Polly and she nodded. “on the count of three, and I do mean three Matty, you boys ready?”
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imagines-r-s · 1 year
Text
terms and conditions
chapter 2
series masterlist
a/n: sorry for how long this took. because of school, i was only able to work on it occasionally, which i am genuinely so sorry for. i appreciate your patience.
taglist: @stxrniqlo @dojacatismywife @gillybear17 @obx-thoughts
warnings: mentions of asher
w.c: 2.8k
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“Why won’t you just tell us what he did to you?” Charlie asked, pacing behind you as you continued to play one of your favorite pieces on the piano.
“I don’t know why you keep asking, Miller, she’s playing the piano right now, which is basically y/n saying ‘shut the fuck up and leave me alone’,” Rafe said, not looking up from his phone. Rafe knew better than anyone that you picked whatever songs you played based off your mood. 
Like the time that you only played the end of ‘Bennie and the Jets’ by Elton John for a week after finding out that you got to go to see one of your favorite artists in concert with VIP tickets for a meet and greet. Or throughout everything that happened with your dad, when all you played were a variety of depressing piano ballads by Taylor Swift, Bon Iver, and Lord Huron. 
And for the past hour, you’ve been playing songs by all three. 
“Yes, which I also know is a sign she needs to talk about whatever is bothering her,” Charlie said, moving to sit next to Rafe on the couch, “please tell me you know that, too.”
“Yeah, I know, but after yesterday at the restaurant I can tell that we won’t get it out of her anytime. And before you ask, yes that worries me, but I can’t really do much about it at this exact moment.”
The two of them looked over to you as you played the ending of “The Night We Met” by Lord Huron and as soon as they heard you start another song, Charlie pulled you from the piano. “Okay, honey. I’m either going to need you to play something more lively or get away from the piano.”
Your eyebrows furrowed, “but you love my playing?”
“Yes, yes, I do, but not when it’s the same depressing shit that Rafe has on his sad playlist for when Kie repeatedly rejects him.”
“Hey,” Rafe said, incredulously, “you said you wouldn’t bring that up, dude.”
“Yeah, sorry. Anyways, you’re here for the summer and summer is fun, okay? So, no more sad music. Now go get ready, we’re going out to the country club today.”
“Do we have to?”
“Yes,” the boys said simultaneously. 
“We’ll meet you out there in 15 and Kelce and Top are on their way,” Rafe added before walking away. 
☾⋆
You had lived rent free in JJ’s head since he saw you at The Wreck the other day. He knew that he would get to see you if Ward worked his plan of having JJ show you around and such, but there was something about you that he couldn’t ignore - he didn’t exactly know what that was yet, but he knew there was something. 
Trying to gather his bearings for work, he went back to the kitchen and put on his apron - hoping that to some extent dealing with a bunch of rich assholes might take his mind off you to some degree. The only problem was as he walked out to deal with his tables, he saw you and the boys making their way toward one of his usual tables. 
“Maybank, you get the Cameron table,” his manager, Justin’s, voice rang out. 
“JT, please, just this one time, can you take it?”
“One, quit calling me JT, asshat. And two, I thought you settled your stuff with Rafe and them?”
“Yes, but-”
“Then, if there’s not another logical reason, I will not be adding a table to my service today.”
“Could bribery work?”
“I make a lot more money than you, Maybank, so unless it’s a valuable quantity, it’s still a no from me, dawg. Just go serve them. The sooner you do, the sooner they leave,” Justin said, practically shoving JJ towards the table. 
JJ resisted the pushing to the best of his ability, “JT, please, I’m begging.”
“Go.” And with that JJ finally let up and made his way over to your table.
Rafe was the first to notice JJ heading their way and sent a subtle nod in his direction. “Maybank, hey man. You our server today?”
Much to his dismay, yes. “Yeah, you guys get to be graced with my presence. What can I get you guys started with today?” JJ asked, getting his notepad out from his back pocket. Maybe if he kept his eyes focused on that, he wouldn’t make too much of a fool of himself. Quickly getting everyone’s drink order, his eyes finally looked where he had been avoiding - you. “Um, hey, what about you?”
He quickly noticed the way that your eyes immediately met his and the way that you smiled at him. “I’ll just get a water, thank you,” you paused, looking for his name tag, “JJ.”
For that reason he immediately regretted wearing his nametag today. “Alright, I’ll be back with that as soon as possible.”
“I think our dear friend just made JJ Maybank flustered, which I must applaud her for,” Kelce said, earning nods of agreement from everyone, but you, who was very much out of the loop. 
“Why is that such a big deal?”
“Well, he’s not necessarily the biggest playboy anymore - Rafe has taken that spot - but he is typically not visibly into people, so it’s very entertaining to witness,” Kelce said, filling you in on the situation. 
“He just asked what I wanted to drink?” you asked, even more confused how they came to that specific conclusion from that minor of an interaction. 
“Yes, but he literally looked everywhere except you and then whenever he finally spoke up, it was rushed and mumbly. He’s a cocky son of a bitch, who usually is not phased by basic conversation, so that definitely counts for something,” Topper chimed in. 
“I doubt it’s anything, see he’s coming back now, we’ll see.”
Everyone’s attention was focused on the interaction - mainly to prove their own point correct. “Alright, I have the waters, the teas, and the Shirley Temple - which by the way Charlie, I hate you for ordering that right now.”
“Sorry, blondie, I hate to disappoint,” Charlie spoke with fake sympathy. 
“It’s all good,” he spoke before turning toward you, “okay, and I’ll start with you as far as what you want to eat. What’s it going to be, babe?”
“Oh, babe? I got my own nickname now?” you asked, egging him on to prove everyone’s point wrong. 
“Well, I mean, sorry. If you don’t want the nickname-” He was so screwed. 
“J, it’s cool. What would you recommend though?”
“Oh, um. Honestly, I’m not a salad person, but I really like our salads. Any of our pasta is to die for, just up to you and what you like.”
You smiled, “Ok, well surprise me, I’m cool with whatever.” Listening as he got the rest of everyone’s orders, you quickly noted how different he acted with everyone else in comparison to you. You could tell just by those quick moments that there was a very obvious difference in dynamics. “Look, I’m not going to say that any of you are right, but there was definitely a difference.”
“Told you,” Rafe and Charlie said, simultaneously. 
The rest of lunch went smoothly, with quite a few more interactions between you and JJ. You could tell that over time he was beginning to get a bit more comfortable with you, to the point that the two of you were both cracking jokes later on. Eventually as all of you finished eating, you gathered your things to head out, “Hey man, see you tomorrow morning?” Rafe asked, which threw you off slightly. 
“Yeah, Rose and Ward both want me to help with planning for Midsummer’s, so I’ll be there pretty much everyday for the next month,” he spoke as he started packing up the table.
“Wait, you work for the Cameron’s?” you spoke up, seeking clarification. 
“Yeah, I do the gardening for Rose and then any other lawn work, boat stuff, or whatever else for Ward. Anything helps, you know. Anyways, you guys have a good one, I’ll see you around.”
JJ watched as the group left the country club as he got the table cleaned up. He headed back to the kitchen ready for another table when Justin stopped him, “so she’s the reason you didn’t want to work that table, huh?”
☾⋆
Waking up the next morning, you finally decided to unpack for the summer. Taking out your clothes and getting your makeup and toiletries settled, you tried to make the Cameron guest room as homey as you could - especially considering that you didn’t exactly have any other options. As you were folding some clothes into your drawer, you heard a soft knock on your door, “come in.” 
“Hey, I come with peace offerings and hope that you’ll talk about your problems,” Rafe said, carrying in the tray that held your favorite breakfast items. “Obviously, you can still have breakfast, even if you don’t talk about whatever happened, but you already know my preference.” He finished off by sending you a sickly, sweet smile before sitting on the edge of your bed.
“What do you want to know, Rafe?” you said, putting some clothes on a hanger and turning away from him. 
“Whatever you’re fine with sharing, Buttercup. I’m not going to force anything out of you, but there’s obviously much to discuss. I just don’t want you to feel like you can’t talk to anyone about anything that’s going on, you know. I’ll be here for you either way, tea time or not.”
Joining Rafe on the side of your bed, you let out a deep breath and a small chuckle, “uh. Asher or why am I here first?”
“Well, not to start this off on a wrong foot, but the Asher thing has been pressing on me since yesterday.”
“Connections are connections.”
“Connections are- huh?”
“That’s what Asher told me right before I broke up with him. The situations kinda go hand in hand, so it kinda just varies on what playing field you look at it on, but nonetheless, I-”
“He said that to you? What the fuck, y/n?” 
You let out another sigh, “do you remember that school that I told you about?”
“With the really nice music program… Johnston’s, right?” he watched as you nodded, “yeah, you mentioned it before you tried out how excited you were and how you were going to convince your mom to let you go, if you got it.”
You nodded, staring straight ahead, “yeah, uh, she found out I got in, got really upset about it, and said I couldn’t go. So, in rational fashion, I went to my boyfriend with the issue and he said it was a silly hobby of mine and that I need to focus on my actual career, like my mom wants. I tried to talk to him about it and how it wasn’t just a hobby and then he started going on about how he should have known I wasn’t serious about being CEO and that he should have picked a better connection.”
Rafe sat in a moment in stunned silence as he processed what you had told him, “y/n.”
“Yeah?” you asked, as if you hadn’t just dropped the most shocking information he could have heard. 
“What the actual fuck?” he stood up quickly and started pacing, “Yeah, no, I see why you didn’t tell anyone else because then you would have had to convince more people not to fly to Asher and pummel his face in. I’m only here right now as I’m still in conversation with you, but what?”
“Yeah, I really don’t know and I just… I feel stupid for not knowing, you know.”
“Don’t blame yourself for his mediocrity. That’s a him problem, not you. I’m sorry you were victim to it though because that was so out of pocket. Is he why you’re here?”
“To some extent, I guess. Not exactly,” you continued watching him pace, “but please don’t tell the boys until I’m ready, I understand why you think you should, but please wait a while.”
“Yeah, yeah, of course, buttercup. Whatever you need I’m here for you,” he made a final turn before giving you a hug. “You deserve so much better than that. I’m sorry.”
You stayed quiet for quite some time. “I think I’m just going to take today easy; practice some piano, do whatever.”
“Please don’t play any Lord Huron, I can’t deal with that today, too.”
“Yeah, I can make do without Lord Huron, got to make sure I save that for whenever Kie rejects you again.” 
“Oh, hey, that was unnecessary. And for payback, I won’t tell you that JJ works today.” 
Grabbing a pillow from your bed, you quickly tossed it in his direction, “oh my god, leave.”
Finishing up your breakfast, you made your way downstairs to the piano. Even throughout all that had happened, you found no ill will towards how you felt about playing the piano. Asher’s words of it only being a hobby and your mother’s disapproval were easily drowned out when your hands hit the keys and the melody of these familiar songs filled the air. If there was one thing that you could always count on, it was this.
Walking into Tannyhill, JJ’s ears immediately picked up on the sound of a piano playing, but he continued on his way under the assumption that it was just someone listening to music. It wasn’t until he passed the Grand Room where the piano was, that he saw you sitting there. The song was familiar to him, but not enough that he could immediately recognize the song; but in all honesty, the song was the least of his concerns. 
Maybe it was the outfit you picked today. Or the way your hair looked today. Or maybe it had something to do with the fact that your body showed how into the music you were. The way that your hands moved so gracefully; or that your body swayed with the music; or how after specific parts of the song, the corners of your mouth would lift up. 
“J, it’s rude to stare” you said, causing his eyes to snap to you, only to find that your eyes weren’t even on him. 
“I wasn’t staring,” he said, “I was just, um, admiring. That was really good by the way.” 
As you finished up the song, you finally took the opportunity to look at him. Your eyes immediately went to the red cutout tee that he was wearing that day, moreso the way his arms looked in the shirt itself. 
Noticing the way that you were staring at him, some of his usual cockiness was able to seep through whatever wall you had somehow put up, “It’s rude to stare, you know.”
“Don’t worry, J, I was just admiring,” he watched as you stood up from the piano and made your way closer to him. “What all are you working on today?”
“Nothing crazy, just pulling weeds for Rose. Why? What’s up?”
“Oh, I was just wondering and I like to ask questions, so.” 
The smile on JJ’s face grew a little, “well, perfect for you, I love answering questions,” He actually hated answering questions, but he wanted a reason to keep talking to you, “but you have to let me ask you some questions, too. Deal?” 
“Deal.” 
☾⋆
JJ didn’t leave Tannyhill for another few hours, which normally he would have been quick to complain about, but he was able to spend all that time with you. Really, he had no room to complain, the only thing in his head was the nagging thought about what Ward was having him do. 
He chose to ignore the fact that he was at least two hours late to the plans that he had with the pogues, but he knew that they would forgive him for it. Riding back to the Chateau, he was immediately welcomed to everyone chilling out with drinks in hand already. 
“Well, would you look at that? JJ finally decided to join us,” John B’s voice rang out as he made his way up the steps of the chateau, “how was work?”
“It was good, can’t complain when all I had to do was pull some weeds.” 
“Doesn’t pulling weeds only take you like an hour? You were gone for four,” Pope’s voice added. 
“Yeah, usually, I don't know what all happened, uh, the ecosystem and all that was on overdrive,” he spoke slowly, hoping that whatever he was saying made sense, “so it took a while.” 
“Something was on overdrive, that’s for sure,” Sarah said, “something to do with a specific pianist that’s residing in my house for the summer?”
A chuckle left his mouth before he could pick up on it, “pianist. That’s such a funny word.”
“Didn’t answer the question,” Sarah stated. 
“I just figured that it would be smart to introduce myself,” he said, with a simple shrug. Maybe they would believe that an introduction took four hours.
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crowwritesaway · 2 years
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Thomas Shelby Best Friend XX
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Anything. I could handle anything. But this…this, I-I can’t. Why? Why now? I mean, she’s not a saint but neither am I.
She looked inside through the window. She glanced around. Nurses rushing out of one room to another. One or two doctors walking into rooms.
She inhaled and exhaled. She needed answers. She had to get answers.
She walked up to Lucas. “Why didn’t you call me? Why did I have to find out through Jade, huh?” Zoey snapped. She balled up her fists.
“Look at yourself. This is why I didn’t tell you.” Lucas said, pointing at her.
“What happened?” Zoey asked, glancing at her mom. She looked so small and fragile.
“She found out.” Lucas said, gritting his teeth. “Found out about what…me?” Zoey whispered in disbelief. She ran a hand through her long hair.
“Fuck sake.” Zoey said, licking her lips. “How?” She asked Lucas, turning away from their mom and looking at Lucas.
“That nosy neighbor of ours, little Miss Patricia.” Lucas said, glaring as he reminisced
“What..what they told her about, me?“ Zoey hesitantly said, sighing.
“S-she told her about Jade.” Lucas said, bitting his lip.
“As in…” Zoey said, hinting about their relationship.
Lucas nodded, glancing back at his mum.
Zoey frowned. How did she find out? Who told her?
She clenched her jaw and told her twin, “I’ll stay away. Take care of her. Her laying on this hospital bed is loud and clear about what she thinks about what Jade’s and I relationship. Let me know if she wants to see me.”
Her twin watched her. She looked conflicted. Mum needs to accept her. She must. I don’t know how she’ll handle this.
Zoey took one last glance at her mum and felt her anger clash with her sadness. Why must she think like them? Why must she judge me based off who I love? She’s gonna hate me. She’s gonna belittle me, again and again.
Zoey walked out we mums room. She felt the weight of the world on her shoulders.
Flashback
Zoey was siting on the couch. Out of nowhere, her mum tells her, “Zoey, don’t become a lesbian. Anyone else can be and live their truth but you. You cannot. You are my daughter and will not be.
Zoey was mine and nodded. Why? Why is it wrong?
Flashback (Zoey’s 14 yrs old)
Zoey glanced at Jade. She looked away. I can’t help but feel. I have to find a way to stop this crush.
Zoey tapped her pencil on the desk. She gritted her teeth. Why is it so hard? Maybe I can just pretend?
Zoey nodded to herself. Yes, ignoring these feelings will be as if they don’t exist.
Zoey sighed. I can’t let her down. I can’t be someone she hate and reject. I don’t think I can handle her hating me.
Flashback (Zoey’s 16 years old)
Zoey accepted she’s different. She leaned that Jade liked her. She happened to overhear a conversation between Jade and her best friend, Sally.
“Shh…you can’t tell Zoey that I like her. I don’t want her to think I’m weird..” She recalled Jade whisper loudly to her friend when she walked into the restroom.
They froze when they saw Zoey. Zoey ignored them. Zoey went into a stall and smiled to herself. Maybe I’m not the only one.
Zoey bitterly laughed once she heard them left. How can I be myself when I know the world and my mum will turn their backs on me or hurt me for being different?
Zoey shook her head. Why should I allow them to push me around? Why should I let society bully me? I’ll hide this from everyone, but not because I fear them but what can happen after?
Zoey clicked her tongue. I’m no lesbian. I simply like a person. I can love a person. There should be no rule to love a person. If both are consenting individuals then love will thrive. Gender should not be an issue.
Zoey got out of the stall. Do I tell my twin? Do I tell the Shelby’s. Ugh.
Zoey inhaled and exhaled
Present
Zoey walked out the hospital. She cleared her throat. She looked around. She felt out of place.
She didn’t know where to go. I can’t to Tommy. I can’t go to John.
Zoey was walking down the street as these thoughts ran in her head. Beep! A car honked beside her. Zoey kept walking, ignoring the honk. Who honks at someone in the middle of the night? Certainly not someone with good intentions?
Zoey rubbed her eyes. She felt stuck. She hated her upbringing. She hated feeling cornered. Why must I hide? Why? Why? Just why? It seems everything that I am causes pain and hurts those around me. Am I in the wrong?
She leaned against a building. What’s another night without sleep? These memories are gonna be the end of me. She pulled out a cigarette and for a moment, contemplated smoking. She shook her head, as memories of the war began to creep in her mind.
You’re okay. You safe. It’s not your fault. She bitterly smiled as she thought about those in her unit who didn’t make it. She angrily crumbled up the cigarette. I don’t deserve to feel at peace.
I should’ve tried harder. I should’ve fought better. I should’ve…ugh. It’s should’ve been me. If only the world was kind to those who are different. If only my mother was less strict and more supportive.
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thesconesyard · 1 year
Text
Yeehaw!
When the Cactus Blooms
7. Tall Handsome Stranger
McCoy was working in the main yard with Jim when the man appeared. He was tall and slim, with piercing eyes. When he removed his hat, his hair was nearly black and brushed back from the temples. His pants were black and his shirt dark, though a bit dusty, probably from his walking.
“Howdy!” Jim called out.
“Hello,” the man answered.
McCoy nodded a greeting and kept working.
“What can we do for you?” Jim asked.
“I was told in town that you have work for people down on their luck.” The man smiled self-deprecatingly.
“Sure,” Jim smiled broadly. “Name’s Jim Kirk. I own the Enterprise Ranch.” Jim stuck his hand out and the other man shook it. “This here is Leonard McCoy.”
“I am John Harrison. A pleasure to meet you Mr. Kirk, Mr. McCoy.”
“It’s doctor actually,” Jim said, nodding at McCoy.
“Oh. My apologies Dr. McCoy,” Harrison said with a slightly remorseful look.
“Don’t worry about it,” McCoy waved a hand. “I don’t practice anymore.” Something about the man’s piercing gaze unsettled him.
Silence passed between the men for a beat.
“Well Mr. Harrison, are you hungry? It’s quite a walk from town and still some time before lunch, but I’m sure the ladies could rustle something up—” Jim said.
“Oh no, please don’t bother. I can wait. I’d prefer to work.”
“Ok,” Jim smiled. “Well, what kind of work do you like? Got something in mind?”
“I did a bit of work engineering and improving mechanical things at my last place,” Harrison answered. His face grew sad.
McCoy hid a frown, but couldn’t help but wonder what had happened where Harrison had last been that gave him that look to mention it.
“Perfect!” Jim exclaimed. “Scotty’ll be glad to have someone help him. He’s our engineering genius.”
“Wonderful,” Harrison smiled.
A chill went down McCoy’s back at that smile, but he didn’t know why.
“You good Bones? I’ll be right back,” Jim asked.
“Yeah kid, I’m fine,” McCoy replied. He turned back to their work. Jim led Harrison along to find Scotty. Keenser and a couple of his birds came up next to McCoy.
“Who?” the short man asked, pointing after Jim.
“Man looking for work. Name’s John Harrison,” McCoy told him.
“Hmm.”
“Did ya tell the gals there’d be an extra?” McCoy asked when Jim returned.
“Slipped my mind,” Jim admitted, a flash of embarrassment crossing his face.
“Knew you would forget,” McCoy grumbled. “Good thing Keenser said he’d let them know.”
“Hey Leonard,” Uhura greeted him as he stepped into the dining room.
“Hi. Can I help?”
“Get the plates out? What’s the new man like?”
McCoy turned to the pile of dishes and began to place them around the table.
“Not sure,” he shrugged. “Only met him really. John Harrison is his name. Someone in town sent him our way.”
“We do take people in,” Uhura gave a light chuckle. They had all found themselves at the ranch one way or another. “Think he’ll stay?”
McCoy couldn’t help his frown, but he turned so Uhura couldn’t see it.
“I don’t know.”
It wasn’t long before the sound of laughing voices reached them in the dining room, as everyone came inside for lunch. Scotty and Harrison were the last to join them. They appeared to be getting along quite well. Scotty introduced him to everyone around the table and pointed him to the empty seat by McCoy.
“Hello again Doctor,” Harrison said as he sat.
McCoy gave him a tight smile.
“Not necessary to call me that,” he said politely.
“Right,” Harrison said carefully, “You said you don’t practice anymore. Why is that?”
McCoy’s shoulders tensed and he saw Christine look over at him. Her hand was sliding towards his.
“I’m sorry John,” Scotty said from up the table. “I should have explained to ye. We don’t much talk about the past.”
“As long as you’re willing to work hard, we take you for who you show us,” Sulu added.
“My apologies,” Harrison said with a chagrined look. “That was much too familiar a question for having just met.”
“No harm done,” McCoy said. His heart was pounding in his chest. Scotty was already on a first name basis with this new man?
“He's sure handsome,” Uhura said.
“Yes,” Christine agreed.
McCoy had stayed inside to help the ladies clean up. He dried a plate as Uhura handed it over to him.
“Polite and smart as well, it seems,” Christine added.
“We’ll feed him well. Poor man; so thin,” Uhura said.
McCoy just listened. Scotty had led Harrison off again after lunch, laughing at something as they went. He’d sort of thought he and Scotty had come to some kind of understanding out at the creek. Maybe he had been wrong. They hadn’t said anything to each other beyond McCoy’s round about way of showing his interest in the man. Maybe he had just imagined the agreeable look in Scotty’s eyes.
He sighed.
“Alright Leo?” Christine asked, coming up behind him and placing a hand around his shoulder.
Giving himself a mental shake, he put on a smile and looked at Christine.
“Right as rain sweetheart.”
She gave him a hard stare for a moment but dropped it.
Harrison became a fixture at the ranch over the following week. He charmed the ladies, helped everywhere he could and seemed to put everyone at ease. Except McCoy. And maybe Spock, but McCoy couldn’t be completely sure about that.
Jim gave Harrison one of the small cabins to sleep in and McCoy could hear him and Scotty, chatting and talking over complex things, sitting out front in the cool evenings.
McCoy was polite, his upbringing wouldn’t let him be anything but, and yet he still felt something. Something bothered him about the man named John Harrison.
“Thought I’d find you here.”
McCoy startled. He’d been down deep in his thoughts, staring into the creek, sitting by one of the big trees. The moon was high, and the stars were out.
“What’s bothering you Leo?” Christine asked as she sat down on the ground next to him and smoothed her skirt.
“Nothing,” he said quickly.
“You’re a terrible liar, honey,” Christine laughed at him. “You’ve been moping all week. What is it?”
“Nothing,” he said again, and turned back to watching the water in the creek as it flowed around some rocks.
“Did he turn you down?” she asked quietly. “You said you were gonna say something last week when you were both gone…”
“No,” McCoy said again. “No. We- I- I indicated how I- how I… well, you know,” he stammered out. “I thought I got myself across clearly. I… I guess I read him wrong.” He let out a soft sigh.
Christine put her arm around him and pulled him over until their heads bumped together.
“All week he’s looked lit up about Harrison. I don’t know why I bother…”
“Oh Leo,” Christine soothed. “It’ll all turn out right, don’t you fret.”
In the morning John Harrison didn’t turn up for breakfast. A bad feeling settled in McCoy’s stomach, but he couldn’t explain why.
As the day went by, it was obvious the man had left as quietly as he had arrived.
“Things are missing Jim,” Uhura stated with a worried frown as the men came in for lunch.
“What things?”
“My mother’s bracelet and that pair of cufflinks that belonged to my father.”
“And a pair of my necklaces,” Christine added.
Jim frowned and looked around at the others.
“Are you sure you gals didn’t just misplace them?”
“I wore one of those necklaces to town last week Jim. It was sitting in my top drawer with my handkerchiefs,” Christine said.
“He took’em,” McCoy muttered.
“We don’t know that!” Scotty said.
“The timing is suspicious,” Spock said. “Is anyone else missing anything?”
It turned out everyone was missing something of value.
“I’ll be damned,” Jim said. “Guess we’ll have to be more careful from now on.”
“Should we go after him?” Chekov asked.
Jim was quiet and looked at Spock before answering.
“Yes.”
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jojo0039 · 1 year
Text
*Summer Heat* The Phantom Part 1
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Jo wakes up to sirens down the road. She's laying on one of the benches with her head on JJ's lap. His arm is wrapped around her while he's clicking his zippo lighter. "Did you sleep at all Jay?" she whispers so she doesn't wake Pope and Kie. JJ shakes his head. "I couldn't sleep. It's ok though you needed to sleep." he tells her. She moves her head up so she's laying her head on his chest. "This whole thing has gotten so messed up." she says. "I know Jo. I am so worried about John B man." Jo looks up at him. "I know I am too. This shit is so fucked up." She watches as JJ stands up and walks over to the back patio door. She stands up and follows him. She grabs his hand to get his attention. "Everything is gonna work out." she tells him. "How do you know?" he asks her in a broken voice. She gives him a small smile. "We just have to believe that everything is gonna work out. Plus John B has us to make sure that it does." Jo assures him. "How can you stay so positive after everything we've been through?" JJ asks in astonishment. He bends down and kisses her. She kisses him back and wraps her arms around his shoulders. "You're amazing." he whispers. She blushes and gives him a small smile. They break apart when Pope walks over to them and looks horrible. "Are they still patrolling?" he asks them. Jo sighs and nods her head. "Yea they just drove past like 5 minutes ago." she says. "Good that means they haven't caught him yet." Pope says. "Let's hope." JJ comments. "You know, we were in that car too. They're probably looking for us also." Kie says as she comes to stand with them. Pope glances at her awkwardly. Jo and JJ share a look. "Well if we're gonna be outlaws, we may as well help John B." Pope states firmly. "So we find him before they do?" JJ asks. Pope reaches into JJ's bag and grabs the keys to his bike. "Where are you going?" Jo asks him. "I'm gonna go get gas for the boat." Pope tells them curtly. He heads for the door. "Be careful." Kie says softly to him. Pope looks at her for a second before he turns his head away from her and looks toward JJ and Jo. "Meet me at the dock at 3 you guys. Don't be late." Pope tells them before he walks out the door. Jo glances at Kie and sees that she's upset. Kie gets up and follows Pope out the door. "What is your problem?" they hear Kie shout to Pope. "Should we-?" Jo points to the door. "We wouldn't be us if we didn't." JJ wraps his arm around her waist as they follow Kie outside. They stand by the door as Kie tries to talk to Pope. He keeps reeving the engine so he can't hear her. They watch as he peels off leaving Kie standing there. Jo pulls away from JJ and walks down the steps to Kie. She offers her a sad smile as she pulls her into a hug. "Come on." Jo starts to pull Kie back inside. They all see a helicopter flying overhead. Jo sees the SBI letters on the side. "Oh my God. This isn't good." she states. ************************ Once they walk back inside, Jo pulls Kie into the back bathroom. "Are you okay?" Jo asks her. Kie nods her head. "Pope told me he was in love with me last night." she reveals. "What? When did he do that?" Jo asks. "Right after you took off around the house. He told me that he has been in love with me for a while." Kie says. "I take it, you didn't say it back." Jo comments. "What could I say? We were trying to get to Sarah and he just drops this on me. I haven't even fully got to process it yet! He hasn't given me time to think. And he's so upset thinking it's an instant rejection and I never wanted to hurt his feelings." Kie says as she tries not to cry. Jo pulls her into a hug. "I know you never meant to hurt him." Jo comforts. "He means a lot to me! He's one of my best friends! I haven't even thought of him like that or any of the boys like that." Jo nods her head. "I know. It's Pope, he won't stay mad long. His ego got hurt, but he'll calm down and you guys will talk and it'll be okay." Jo calmly replies. Kie gives her a small smile. "You're right. He'll calm down eventually." Jo nods her head. "We just have to worry about getting John B out of here." Jo goes to leave the bathroom, but Kie doesn't follow her. "I saw you." Jo turns around with a confused look. "What?" Jo asks. "I saw you with Rafe last night. Why didn't you push him away when he kissed you?" Kie asks. Jo doesn't know what to say. "I- I- he just caught me by surprise. I didn't know he was gonna kiss me." she tells Kie. "You can't still have feelings for him! He's the reason John B is on the run!" Kie lectures. "I know-" Kie cuts her off. "He's a murderer-" " I know." "After everything that he has done to us, you shouldn't want anything to do with him!" "I know Kie!" Kiara shuts up and just stares at Jo. Jo sighs in frustration. "I know okay. I know that Rafe is an unstable person and I'm not defending him whatsoever. You haven't said what I haven't told myself a million times these last few weeks. He was my first everything, and he wasn't always like this." Jo wipes some tears off of her face. "I've been trying to move on from him and sometimes he makes it really hard to. But I know that I have to not only for obvious reasons, but because of JJ. We're starting something and I really wanna see where it goes. I care about him so much. It's not fair to him that I still have Rafe hanging on." Jo cries to her best friend. Kie quickly pulls Jo into a hug. "It's gonna be okay. I'll be here for you and help you figure out your love life after we get John B off the island." Jo wipes the tears and clears her throat. "You're completely right. I shouldn't even let this get to me." Jo comments and stands up. "Hey, you're always the strong one and there for everyone else. It's okay to let someone else be there for you." Kie tells her. "I love you." Jo smiles. "I love you too. Pogues for life." Kie states. "Pogues for life." Kie and Jo do their pogue handshake. "Now let's go out there before JJ starts looking for us." Kie says. "You go. I'll be out in a minute." Kie nods and walks out of the bathroom. Jo turns back towards the mirror and cleans her face up so it doesn't show that she has been crying. *************************** Jo walks back out to the lobby of the restaurant. JJ and Kie are putting some food in boxes. "Are you alright?" JJ asks her watching her carefully. She gives him a small smile. "I'm good. Everything just caught up to me. I needed a moment." She says as she grabs another box. "Is this gonna be enough food for them?" Kie asks as they each load up a box of food. "It's gonna have to be. I mean it'll be good for a couple of weeks, that's all they really need." JJ says as they grab the boxes. They walk outside to load the jeep. "Where the hell have you been?" They look up to see Jo's dad and Anna, Kiara's mom. "Dad? What are you doing here?" Jo asks. "Kiara's parents called me. I thought we talked about this. This behavior is completely uncalled for. Go get in the truck now." he demands of his daughter. "We were all up half the night, scared to death looking for you guys." Anna tells them. "Were you even gonna say anything to us?" Buzz asks. "Dad, I'm not getting in the truck!" Jo argues. "I'm telling you now mom." Kie argues with her mom. "Yes you are! Do you not understand the severity of this situation right now! You're gonna be an accessory to a murderer!" Buzz yells at them. "I told you already John B didn't do this!" Jo argues. "What the hell are you guys doing?" Anna asks them. "I'm sorry Mrs. Anna, Mr. M but we really have to go." JJ says to them as he closes the back latch of the jeep. "You guys aren't going anywhere! You are in so much trouble." Buzz lectures. "I'm sorry dad. I love you but John B needs us." Jo pushes past her dad as JJ gets in the passenger seat. Anna tries to pull Kie away from the car. "There is a storm coming! This is not safe!" Anna yells at her daughter. Buzz grabs Jo's arm. "You are not going." Jo yanks her arm out of his grasp. "John B needs me! I dont turn my back on my best friends like you do!" She accuses her dad. She feels slightly guilty after seeing the look on his face. "These pogues are criminals Kiara! You girls are gonna get shot!" Anna yells through the window at her daughter. Jo starts the car. "Get out of the car now! There is a storm coming!" Buzz tries to open the door. "I'm sorry dad, John B needs me!" Jo peels out of the parking lot. "Damn it!" Buzz shouts in anger. Jo drives the car to JJ's house. She parks the car in the front yard. She reaches over and grabs JJ's hand. "I can come in with you. You know I will." she tells him. He shakes his head. "This will only take a minute. Plus I dont want you to have to see him." JJ tells her. "You know I don't care about that." she responds. "I'll be right back." He opens the door and walks into the house. The girls sit in silence until JJ comes back out. He swings the key around on his finger. "See, easy peasy." he tells her with a small smile. ***************************** Jo pulls into the garage where the boat is being housed. They get out and JJ unlocks the door and opens it up. They see the boat sitting there. "There she be, hey girl." JJ speaks softly to the boat. "A 1983 Formula 402 SR1." JJ grabs Jo's hand and pulls her closer to the boat with him. She gives him a look of amusement. "This is the Phantom. I want my two girls to get acquainted with each other." JJ winks at her. She smiles with a shake of her head. "The first boat to make the run to Bermuda in under 16 hours. She's 40 years old you guys! And still the fastest thing that Kildare has ever seen." He speaks about the boat with pure love. "Why are you speaking nicer to the boat than you do me." Jo jokes with a laugh. "I'm introducing my two girls to each other." JJ tells her as she makes an amused face the entire time. "It's kinda a junker." Kie states. JJ gives her a deadpan look. "Really? She's right there Kie, she can hear you. Let's just put it this way. You two would not be smoking weed right now if she never existed." Jo shakes her head. "Come on, let's get this latched up." They hear a motorbike approaching. "Finally Pope." Kie mumbles. Jo walks closer to the door but stops with a gasp when she meets Rafe. Her eyes widen. "Rafe? What are you doing here?" She asks as she backs up slowly. "Hey, sweetheart. I missed you baby." Rafe comments before he whistles and Barry appears from the other side. Barry cocks a gun and points it at JJ. Before she can do anything Rafe grabs her around her waist and pulls her tightly against him. "You just stay right here with me. I won't let him hurt you." He whispers in her ear. She struggles against his grip. "Let me go Rafe now!" Rafe just tightens his grip. "See, don't think I forgot about me and you on the side of the road." Barry says to JJ. "I'm here because I want my mother fucking money!" Barry shouts in JJ's face before he punches him. "JJ! Rafe let me go now!" Jo continues to struggle in Rafe's grip. Barry punches JJ again. "Where's my money?!" Kie jumps on Barry's back. "Stop it! Leave him alone!" Barry throws Kie off of him and she hits her head on the boat. "Kie!" Rafe wraps his hand around Jo's jaw and makes her watch Barry hit JJ. "This doesn't have to happen this way. Look and see what's happening to your boy. Just tell us where John B is and Barry will let him go." Rafe whispers in her ear. "We don't know where he is!" Jo tells them. She struggles against his grip. She yanks her head back and headbutts him. "Fuck!" He quickly releases her. Kie stands back up. "We know what you did Rafe! You shot Peterkin! Do you really think Jo wants anything to do with you after that?" Kie shouts in his face. "I really wish you didn't say that." Rafe says calmly before he wraps his hand around Kiara's throat. Jo rushes forward and tries to pull his hand off of her. "Let go of her Rafe! Stop!" Rafe pushes her away from him. Barry is still kicking and hitting JJ. "Rafe please!" Pope sneaks up behind them and hits Rafe in the back with a pipe. "Get away from them!" he shouts. Rafe turns around and swings at Pope. He punches him, and Pope lands a punch on him back. Rafe swings again and misses. Pope punches him hard making him sway. Pope continues to punch him. "Pope stop!" "Pope he's had enough!" "Pope stop it!" Pope grabs a rope and wraps his neck around it and pulls. Jo's eyes meet Rafe's widened ones as he struggles to breathe. "Pope, stop he can't breathe!" JJ pulls Pope away as Rafe falls to the ground as he regains his breath. "We have to get out of here!" Kie and JJ start latching up the boat to the jeep. Jo drops down to her knees and puts her fingers on Rafe's throat checking for major injuries. Rafe's eyes meet hers as he struggles to breathe. "Stay off the cut, and stay the fuck away from Joanna you piece of shit!" Pope tells Rafe, before he pulls Jo up. Rafe's eyes never leave Jo's as she runs to the jeep.
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Text
Cory McBrown: Year 2-Chapter 4
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20th of December, 2002
I don’t believe this. At the beginning of the week, I did not care about boys in the least. Romance seemed like something I would never EVER be interested in. How can two minutes with a stranger whose real name I don’t even know change that? I still don’t really care about boys. It’s Smithy I care about. I lean against my locker and look around at the sea of students and know that not one of these boys makes me feel like Smithy did. I don’t have any clue why. I don’t even know where Smithy lives. Maybe he doesn’t have a home. He had the look of an addict. What could I have possibly seen in him?
But underneath all that sadness that surrounded him, he had the brightest, most infectious smile. I couldn’t help but smile when he did. And I’d never seen eyes like that before. I suppose one could argue he had pretty generic brown eyes, but there was something about them. I almost felt dizzy and dopey looking into them. Mum told me once that you can see a person’s soul through their eyes. Well, if that’s true, then he has a wonderful soul. Brimming with life, but burdened with sadness.
That’s the other thing. He didn’t get defensive until I made him feel vulnerable. Obviously something’s happened to him to make him afraid to trust people, and that breaks my heart. I wish I could’ve helped him, if for no other reason than to know he’s gonna be okay.
“Cory, are you okay?” Sam comes up to me. “Why are you crying?”
I didn’t even realize I was crying. I was just waiting for her and John before we went home.
I try to shake it off. “I’m fine.”
Sam eyes me suspiciously. “You’re not still on about that kid, are you?”
“I just can’t help wanting to know if he’s okay,” I say. “He didn’t look so good.” I don’t tell her that I liked him in another way. For one thing, I’m a little afraid she’ll judge me. For another thing, I don’t really want her to make a big deal out of the fact that, yes, I was wrong. I have now had feelings for a boy. Big deal.
Sam puts her hand on my shoulder. “You can’t help everyone.”
I sigh. She continues. “Remember what Bart said when he came back? The kid had downed nearly half a bottle of whiskey by then, and it wasn’t that long between when we left and when Bart went to see him.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.”
21st of December, 2002
Yule
In my house, we’ve always done Yule, the pagan version of the holiday, and Christmas because we have non-pagan relatives (Edward for example). In our case, we open one present on Yule and then the rest at Christmas. We also have another special dinner, and sometimes a fire in the fire pit in our backyard.
Tonight, after exchanging gifts and having our meal, we sit out by the fire, roasting marshmallows. I remain kind of quiet.
Mum sits next to me. “How’re you doing, honey?”
I look at her. “Fine.”
“You’ve been kind of quiet the last few days.”
Bart perks up on our conversation. “This isn’t still about that kid, is it?”
I frown at Bart. “Bart!”
“What kid?” Mum asks.
I sigh. Why did he have to open his big mouth? “We were walking home from school the other day, and I saw this boy on the street-“
“Smoking herb outside a liquor store.” Bart comments.
I frown at him. “And then what happened?” Mum asks.
I get uncomfortable. “I went over to talk to him, and… I don’t know.”
Bart blows out his marshmallow. “He pushed her.”
Mum raises her eyebrows. “Bart, quit telling the big brother version of the story. That is not what happened!” I say.
Mum looks at me. “What do you think happened?”
“Bart’s gonna make fun of me.” I say.
“I will ground him until graduation if he does.” Mum assures me.
Bart makes a face. I sigh. “Fine. I wanted to help him. He looked like he was only my age. No kid who’s loved spends time smoking weed on the street. I just wanted to be his friend, and… That scared him I think… I mean, before I said that, we were totally connecting. And once I did, he got defensive and retreated. He didn’t push me. He pushed my hand off his shoulder. He didn’t hurt me… I mean, not physically anyway… It did kind of hurt my feelings when he did that.”
Mum nods. “Honey, I understand you wanting to help people, especially a kid, but I don’t think that was a situation you should’ve gotten involved in. Not by yourself anyways. That could’ve been dangerous.”
“Mum, he looked terrified. Terrified and sick.” I start to cry. “It was almost like I was the first person who ever showed him kindness. I just wanted to help him.”
Mum puts her arm around me. “And you’re wonderful for that, sweetie… But you can’t help everybody.”
“I know everyone keeps saying that, but… I don’t want people to tell me I can’t help everybody. I don’t want to help everybody, I wanted to help him, and I feel sad that I can’t.”
Mum rubs my arm. “I understand, sweetie… Was there something else that happened?”
I don’t answer right away. Then I sigh. “Let’s just say I think I know what Sam’s talking about now.”
Mum nods. Bart frowns. “Wait, you had a crush on him?”
“Graduation, Bart.” Mum warns.
Bart frowns and goes back to roasting marshmallows. “So you had some unexpected feelings for this boy, is that what you’re telling me?”
I nod. “And I don’t suddenly think all boys are cool, now… No one at my school is even remotely interesting to me… I don’t know why I cared about this boy so much.”
“Well, honey, the heart doesn’t always make sense. You don’t have to rationalize it.”
“But why do I miss someone I don’t even know? Why do I worry about him still?”
“Well, maybe it might help you to pray for him.”
I frown. So does Bart. “Pray for him?” I say, quizzically.
“For whatever reason you had a connection with this boy, and because you’re such a loving, caring person, you want things to be okay for him, right?” Mum explains.
I nod. “So instead of trying to rationalize why you felt that way, why not ritualize it? Wish him well on his journey and let him go.”
I think about that for a moment. There really isn’t anything I can do for him practically. I guess praying for his well-being is the next best thing. I mean, I believe receiving loving energy is beneficial, even if you don’t realize it’s coming to you, or where it’s coming from.
I nod. “Okay.”
Mum nods. “Wanna take my hand? Edward!” Mum calls to Edward, a few feet away.
He comes over and sits down with us. “We’re going to send some loving energy to Cory’s friend.” Mum explains.
Mum takes my hand, and Edward’s. I also take little Jenny’s hand. Edward reaches for Bart’s hand, too. Bart is a little hesitant, but he takes Edward’s hand anyway.
“Mother Earth, we call upon you to pray for the healing of another. Cory, would you like to say it?” Mum asks me.
I nod. I take a deep breath, thinking about what I want to say. “Mother Earth, I ask you to please take care of Smithy. I do not ask you to fix, or spare him, I know I cannot ask you that… But just take care of him. Help him on his journey… Let him know that there are people in this world who love him… He really needs that.”
We’re all silent for a moment.
I look at Mum. “I know I don’t know him… but I could tell he hasn’t had a lot of people love him, so somebody has to… Even if from afar.”
Mum puts her arm around me. “That was beautiful, honey.”
Edward nods. “I don’t know who we’re talking about here, but I agree.”
Bart nods, too. “I guess that’s all in the spirit of Christmas isn’t it?… Love even those you don’t know… Especially the unloved.”
Mum nods. Bart’s right, I think. Why does the world only do that at Christmas, I wonder. Why is it “the Spirit of Christmas” to help strangers, and love the unloved? Let’s forget for a moment the personal feelings I felt for Smithy. I saw a 14 year old on the street, in front of a liquor store, smoking weed, completely disheveled, malnourished, and terrified. Now, I know that you can’t help everybody, but what kind of person would I be if I didn’t try? He clearly needed help, and I tried to give it to him in the way I knew how. For me, that was being his friend. Although, to a certain degree, that’s weird cause I’m not usually the type to make the first move when it comes to making friends. That’s more Sam’s speed. Even Bart gives long glances before he’ll ever say anything.
But let’s examine that further. Smithy is very clearly an addict, or at the very least, he’s in need of some kind of help. I know there are places for people like that, but why are they social outcasts? Shouldn’t it be easier for them to get that help? These are people in pain, who have turned to the only source of relief they could find, however unhelpful. Society shouldn’t outcast them as “drunks”, “lowly addicts”, etc. These people need a healthier source of relief. They need love and connection, even if they don’t believe that.
Well, I hope he finds it. If not that, I hope he at least finds peace.
25th of December, 2002
Christmas Day
Christmas morning, I take little Jenny and barge into Bart’s room, yelling. “Wake up! Wake up!”
Bart rolls over and puts his pillow over his head. “Ugh. Shouldn’t you have grown out of this part yet?”
“Oh, tthhpbb!” I blow a raspberry at him.
Then I start to tickle him. “Ah! Hey! Not fair!” He yells.
“Bart, wake up! Wake up!” Jenny yells.
Bart rolls out of bed. His hair looks really funny. “Fine. I’m up. Is Mum up yet?”
“No. You know the rules,” I say. “The kids get up first.”
“Thank god I’ll be an adult next year.” Bart says, fixing his hair.
I run out of the room. “Wait, Cory! Take Jenny with you! I have to get dressed.”
I stick my head back in the room. “Bart, we always open presents in our pajamas!”
“No, no, and no! I drew the line at that at 15,” Bart informs me.
I roll my eyes and leave the room. Did I really just do that? Did I really become a teenager? I rolled my eyes at my brother. Oh well. It’s a rite of passage, I guess.
I take Jenny downstairs and sit her down in front of the tree. I turn the lights on, and it shines in brilliant points of white and multicolored light. I always insist we have colored lights as well as white lights.
Just as Bart comes downstairs, there’s a knock on the door. Bart goes to answer it cautiously. It’s Sam and John, dressed in their elf clothes again. John has some kind of baked good.
“What are you two doing here? It’s half 6 in the morning!” Bart scolds them, although I can tell he doesn’t sound too mad at them.
“It’s Christmas morning, and it’s the last Christmas we’re all going to be kids,” Sam says.
Bart lets down his shoulders. “Ye had to appeal to my sentimental side,” he says. “I’ll go make some breakfast.”
We all sit for about half an hour while Bart makes chocolate chip pancakes until Mum and Edward make their way downstairs. Jenny asks what Santa brought everyone. I figured out a long time ago that Santa wasn’t actually real, but I think it’s sweet that Jenny still believes. Actually, don’t tell anyone, but there’s a small part of me that still wants to believe.
We spend the day opening presents, eating John’s candy cane cake (yes, he really did make it), watching Christmas movies, and singing carols. It almost makes me forget about my troubles. Almost.
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padfootdaredmetoo · 2 years
Note
Hey 👋 I’m not too sure if your doing requests( if not completely ignore this it’s fine:)) but I was requesting a peaky blinders one-shot where reader is like an orphan and lives in an orphanage and tommy the philanthropist he is goes down to the orphanage with Polly,John,Arthur,and Ada and whoever else you want and they see reader going at it with on of the sisters. You could choose the conflict or their argument but yeah, if you could draw the reader as someone who’s quick and sarcastic with their words like a speak before thinking type of person you know. Also can this be like a tommy Shelby x daughter!reader kinda like a found family kind of trope. Sweet kisses love your stories❤️
Dear Anon,
I hope this does it justice!! I changed a few things because I felt like it fit the story better (I hope that's alright) but there is lots of family stuff. And lots of Lizzie and Tommy - not something I have ever written before so hopefully that's also alright. Sweet kisses back to you love, thank you for this wonderful idea!!!
Warnings: peaky type stuff, religious language? Implied that a priest was going to assault the reader, bad words, not descriptive death of parents, mentioned death of a baby, grief, so much sweetness and hurt comfort and hopefully laughs. I promise it's not as dark or sad as it sounds. Also some Grace bashing / group hate.
Word count: 6606 - may have gotten carried away...
Part 2
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Tommy watched Lizzie closely as they approached the large building. According to his sources it housed around a hundred and fifty children, the building was large but it didn't seem that large. 
It was gray and rainy, much like every day. The dark dampness didn’t bother him as it had seeped into his bones and made a home long ago. At this point, he was convinced that the sunlight would simply cause him to turn to ashes if it ever reached his skin. 
Lizzie looked nervous but that was expected, he felt beyond nervous. Suddenly hoping she would change her mind altogether. Children were overrated, he would know having raised Finn and half of John's kids. But after her she lost the baby, he would do anything to bring some happiness to her. He knew he wasn't the best husband, but he was trying to do better every day. 
Walking up the steps a voice in his mind started to remind him that he would only be bringing this baby into a world of danger and horror. Only going to ruin them so no God would allow them refuge. He pushed them down as best he could, reaching out to hold Lizzie’s hand. She looked taken back at the gesture, another thing wrong with them. Wrong with the situation. 
They were escorted in to look at the babies. They were just as expected, plump, cute, and small. Tommy tried not to look at them too close, no point in getting attached. Lizzie would pick a baby, and he would attempt to be a good father. 
He hated that he knew what it felt like to reach out for parents that were not there to hold you. He was sulking when a commotion caught his attention. 
“For Fucks sakes woman! ” A girl shouted. 
“You listen here. Father Stryker is a noble member of this community and organization. You will do what he asks of you.” A woman responded in a cold tone. 
“We both know that’s not what God would want you old bat.” The girl snapped back and he held back a smile. 
“Now you listen here, we do not know what God wants, that’s not our place. He has a way -” 
“No, he sure as hell doesn't. God would NEVER.” The girl demanded. “I thought God was in all of us, and GOD doesn't want me to be alone with him. In fact, I would say he’s overcome with passion about the issue. It would be a sin for me to ignore his protests.” 
“I will not tolerate such language, you foul girl!” The sound of a slap was dealt out. Tommy felt an odd feeling of unease about the situation. 
“You let this happen! You. And you will BURN FOR IT. Mark my words, you will suffer an eternity for his sins. There are no amount of crosses under the sun for Jesus to croak on that would make up for your grotesque choices you evil witch.” The girl's voice was pure venom, and Tommy was overcome with an urge to protect the girl. What type of place were they running here? 
“I want her,” Lizzie said clearly standing next to him looking at the Sister that was showing them around. 
“Sorry Mrs. Shelby ?” She asked looking for clarification. 
“The girl in the hall.” He looked at Lizzie landing her eyes on a girl that must have been about 15 standing off with the nun in the hallway. Her face was beet red, making her blue eyes seem extraordinarily bright in contrast,  her fists clenched ready for a fight of any size. That girl did not care what happened, she wasn't going to back down. 
“Ah, are you sure? She’s quite temperamental.” She responded looking embarrassed. 
“Excellent, I’ve never seen anyone look so much like my husband,” Lizzie said with a smirk on her face.  
“We’ll take her. And I’d like a word with management.” He asserted firmly. This was not the sort of thing he could look the other way on, plus it would only further the family image. Win-win. 
______________________________
Another sister came into the hallway. 
“Sister Margret, she has been requested by a family.” She said quickly. 
You were positive this must be some type of trap. But a tall angular woman moved into the hallway. She looked like someone from a painting, impossibly pretty, elegant, clothes worth a small fortune. This was impossible. 
The sister grabbed your arm and pulled you away from that bitch. Far away from the classroom you were terrified of. 
The lady looked you up and down and removed the sister's hand from your arm. She shot her a warning look and the sister apologized. Whoever this woman was, she meant business. 
“I’m Lizzie, Lizzie Shelby.” She said in a voice that belonged on a stage. You introduced yourself feeling embarrassed. 
“We’d like to take you home if you're alright with that.” She asked holding her arm out. Normally you didn’t like being touched for any reason, but being escorted out of the place was a good enough reason for you to make an exception. 
You looped your arm in hers and she strode out of the place with her head held high. 
“The Paperwork -” The sister called out 
“Get my husband to deal with it.” She called back, her voice dripping with power. You accompanied her into a very expensive car. You sat in the back seat beside her and watched her take in your appearance as if it had changed being in the natural light. 
“Do you read?”  She asked you lighting a cigarette.
“I had a tutor before my parents died.” 
“How did they pass?” 
“Car accident.” 
“I’m sorry.” 
“Me too.” 
“We’ll expect you to go to school.” 
“You’d be a shit parent if you didn't.” You mentally kicked yourself. “Sorry I -didn't” You were stumbling over an apology as the door opened and a man got into the driver's seat. 
“That’s my husband. Thomas.” 
“Hello,” You said feeling completely deflated. “It’s nice to meet you, both of you, It’s nice.” You couldn't remember a time being so embarrassed. You wished that they would just run you over with their expensive tires. There were just too many emotions in such a short period. 
An hour ago a priest was forcing himself on you, telling you God would never allow you to get adopted, and here you were making a fool out of yourself with your new parents. 
That phrase stung so bad you visually imagined pushing it from your mind.
“Did you sort the paperwork?” Lizzie asked in a frosty tone that made you wonder what their relationship problems were like. 
“That and a few other things.” He responded in a tone you assumed only ghosts were capable of. 
“Like what?” She said looking out the window with resentment. 
“Taking the place over.” He responded easily. As if it was no big deal, like spending money on petrol for the car. 
“What do you mean?” This caught her off guard and you watched a bit of hopefulness come to life in her eyes. 
“Saw things.” He hesitated, obviously aware of your presence in the car. “That I didn’t think God would approve of.” You caught a slight smirk on his face in the mirror. His eyes told you it was easier to poke fun at the situation. 
Lizzie hummed in approval, and even though you’d only known them a few minutes it felt like progress. 
_______
They wanted to give you a few days to settle in before introducing you to the whole family. Something you saw as a bit of a red flag. The house was massive, but it was clean and quiet. Both a blessing and a curse. You were too shy to ask for something to do or go explore. Your bedroom was unbelievably beautiful, and warm. 
There was a knock on the door that caused you to jump. 
“Yeah?” 
“Can I come in?” Lizzie’s voice rang through the door. 
“Of course” You responded stiffly. She came in and smiled at you, she pointed to your bed but you didn't understand what she was looking at. Should you not have been laying on it during the day? 
“Is it alright if I sit?” She asked you and you realized that’s what she meant. 
“Yes!” You sat up straight feeling like an idiot once again. You’d had to sit through two dinners each equally painful due to your rambling. 
“How are you settling in?” She asked kindly. 
“Um, fine. It’s nice. I love my room.” 
“What do you get up to in here?” She looked around with a frown. 
“Mostly sitting and thinking.” You responded blandly. 
“Are you sure I can’t take you shopping for anything?” She’d asked at least three times, and you felt horrible imposing on them further. 
“I don't want to bother you.” You finally broke. She let out a strange laugh. 
“Bother me. All the time. Big stuff little stuff, doesn't matter.” She picked a piece of lint off of your bedspread. “Plus kids cost money you know. That’s no one's fault, so don’t carry it like a burden.” 
Your eyes stung with tears. That was not the narrative you had grown up with parents or none. You’d always been acutely aware of the burden your existence placed on people. Her words made you feel like you were special, not something your parents could give you. This brought on a very large mix of feelings. 
“Don’t cry, really all this is-”  Her face appeared displeased with your reaction and it only made your hurt more. 
“Normal. Not for me, it’s not. If you wanted a kid that was used to this you should have had one yourself.” the words flew out of your mouth and she was up and out of the room before you could try to apologize. You felt so much worse, you wanted to pull out all your hair trying to make it stop. 
You stopped trying to hold the tears back and got up off your bed to apologize. An embarrassing apology was better than them shipping you back. 
You followed the sound of her soft crying sounds. Through a door that was slightly ajar. It was a beautiful nursery. They had tried to have their little spoilt children, the guilt only became worse. 
You locked eyes with her and decided the truth was always best. 
“You treat me better than my parents. But they're dead and it hurts. I don't want to bother you both, it's already some kind of miracle that I got adopted at this age, I don't want to push my luck. Or live through you getting bored of me and then tossing me aside.” 
For a moment you thought she was going to shout at you. But she just nodded in understanding. You both were crying, so why not try to risk a hug. You got down on the sheep skin rug next to her and hugged her. 
Her grief wrapped around you with her slender arms. She pushed your face against her chest and kissed the top of your head. You didn't understand, but the hurt in her felt a lot like the hurt inside of you. So you leaned into the feeling crying just as hard. 
“I lost her. She was born and - nothing anyone could do about it.” She said after a long while. The thought made your heart break all over again. “They told me I couldn't have kids. Spent years avoiding it like it was the plague and now, God it hurts.” 
“I’m so sorry.” 
“I’m sorry for you too. My dad left before I was born, mother passed when I was 13. Prostitute till I was twenty.” She let out a sad laugh. “This life.” She motioned to the house with her arm. “Is not the life I came from and my husband doesn't have much. But he has money, so don’t ever feel bad for spending it.” You looked up at her in shock. There was no way she was telling the truth. She looked like she belonged in a palace like you wanted to trust her with the whole world. So elegant, kind eyes. 
“We’re the same then” you whispered. 
“Absolutely not!  If you become a prostitute I will have officially become the worst mother in history.” She said causing you both to laugh. 
“I’m not good with people.” You joked along. Tommy pushed the door open and you stiffened slightly. No matter how you tried to calm down, he made you uneasy. Like he would be impossible to please or get to know.
“It’s not a whore house?” He said with a confused look having caught the end of the conversation. You’d never seen a man look more confused as the both of you were tear-soaked holding each other on the floor. 
“Not anymore it's not.” Lizzie quipped causing him to almost smile. You wondered what made him so stuck up.
“Good lord, how did you guys make all this money again?” You asked cheekily, causing Lizzie to laugh. 
“Just you wait.” She said lightly, but you couldn't help but know already that it was not God’s work that placed them here.
“Come down for lunch?” he asked you both, still slightly put off by the situation. 
“Yes” she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hands, you watched her walls of composure surround her once again. 
“Come on. Let’s see how much trouble we can get in before supper.” She said helping you up. 
_____________________________
You stopped by to pick up people on the way to the shops. 
“We’ll get Esme first. She’s John’s wife. Tommy’s younger brother - he made a deal with the Lee family - a bunch of gypsies - Tommy needed men, and she needed a husband. Technically I almost married John. It was a complicated time. But they both get along like a house on fire. She holds him down pretty good, probably the only reason he’s still alive.” You listened as she drove you through the countryside. “Then we’ll get Polly. She’s Tommy’s Aunt. She probably goes up against him the most. She’s some kind of Gypsy royalty, a very peculiar woman, but she means well. Hated Tommy’s first wife Grace. Well, we all hated Grace. Us women tend to stick together. We have to put up a good front against the boys or they raise hell like nothing else.” 
“You’re all gangsters then?” You asked her catching her slightly off guard. 
“Technically he’s a gangster turned politician. But trust me having been on the receiving end of both there really isn't a difference.” 
You blushed at her words and tried to hold your tongue. 
“I shouldn't have said that last part.” She flicked her cigarette case open and lit one up. “Forget I said that.” but you started laughing. You pulled up to a country-style house, chickens squawking loudly at the car engine. 
“Oi! That is not a baby!” A woman with wild curly hair approached the car. She slid into the backseat and you felt awkward sitting in the front. You looked at her looking you over. “Total babe, but not a baby.” She said with wide eyes in disbelief.
“She’s fifteen,” Lizzie responded looking at you like you were a brand new car. 
“Good lord. Going to have to beat the boys off of her. She’s pretty like you.” 
You blushed heavily at her words unsure of what to do with the attention. 
“Eh, as long as we keep her close I think we’ll manage just fine.” Lizzie smiled and turned the car around. 
“I’m Esme, I’m sure Lizzie caught you up to speed.” She lit a cigarette and smiled at you as you introduced yourself. She asked you lots of questions, about how you liked the place. 
“It’s cold. You can say it, love.” Esme blurted out. “It’s a monument to Grace. Should have been burnt down the second she left us.” You could tell this was a part of the stormy ocean of problems that rested between your adopted parents. You put that piece of knowledge into your back pocket. You pulled up to a stylish-looking complex and a woman in a black suit and sunglasses approached the car. 
“I was going to offer to babysit for you when you need a rest - but by the looks of it I’ll be asking you for help, love.” 
“How many kids do you have?” You asked while you waited. 
“Too fuckin’ many,” Polly responded climbing into the back seat. “I thought you asked Tommy for a baby, not a miniature replica of yourself?” 
“Come off it Pol,” Lizzie said starting the car. 
“I’m serious, I thought I was seein’ a bloody ghost. I’ve known you since you were the size of a potato, when I say she looks just like ya, I fuckin’ mean it.” 
You looked at Lizzie and wished you looked even a fraction of how beautiful she was. 
“How's he managing with this then? He was always good with the kids when they were little but I can’t imagine he’d know what to do with her.” Polly said stealing Esme’s cigarette. 
“Eh, like everything else, he’s adjusting.” Everyone seemed to find this funny. 
“You look at me, that boy gives you any trouble you call me alright. I’ll set him straight.” She was strong like Thomas but soft like Lizzie, and something distinctly her own. You could tell she was in charge. 
“Thank you.” You said sheepishly unsure of what else to say. 
“You're welcome, love,” She said kindly. 
Shopping was a lot. You cried on the way home and they had a unique way of comforting you while also making fun of you, making you laugh. Once you started laughing with them it seemed impossible to stop. You assumed that you would all pile into the sitting room, but instead, you piled into the kitchen, which quickly became your favorite space in the house. A large wooden table surrounded by something that felt so perfectly warm. Grace clearly didn’t touch this space much. 
They poured you cranberry juice and set into a bottle of whiskey. The jokes got worse as the night progressed and for once your sharp tongue and misplaced comments brought a great deal of joy. 
“Where did you find this girl!” Esme said between laughs 
“Fighting off a Nun in a hallway,” Lizzie replied still laughing from the joke before. Tommy and you assumed his brothers appeared in the doorway.
“Wow, Looks like you Lizzie, but with Tom’s eyes” John said, or you thought it was him because he went to stand behind Esme and she looked up at him in a way you hadn't seen before. 
“And his mouth.” Esme quipped and you hoped it was a compliment. He reached across the table to shake your hand. 
“John” 
“It’s nice to meet you” You introduced your self. Arthur came and gave you a crushing hug. 
“They got you out numbered now brother.” He joked letting you go to pour himself a glass of whiskey.
Tommy gave you a tense look, like he was worried about something. He took the seat next to you puting space between you and the boys. 
“Might be enough women to put some life back into this place.” Polly said with twinkling eyes. 
“I’ll try my best.” You responded quickly seeing that Tommy didn’t seem happy. 
He stuck close to your side, sliding glasses of Whiskey away from you as the boys started drinking. His youngest brother was only a few years older than you, and he showed up with a bunch more men that introduced themselves politely before joining into the savagery. 
You scooted your self along the bench to sit closer to Tommy not knowing the others well enough to want to sit as close. 
“Thank you, Lord, for blessing us with such a wonderful girl! May she shine bright for us in these dark times. To the newest Shelby!” Arthur’s voice boomed and your face turned bright red. Everyone finished a drink, but you caught Lizzie and Tommy sharing a look. 
Tommy put his arm around and you were grateful to have something to lean into with all the commotion. They were the loudest and rudest, most funny group of people you’d ever seen. 
“Think it’s time for bed, eh?” He asked you quietly and you nodded. 
“Alright! Clear out you lot. She’s got to get to bed. We can have a proper dinner tomorrow night!” Tommy called out causing a few groans. 
“But we just got here!” Finn mumbled.
Everyone said their goodbyes and goodnights to you moving out of the kitchen. Polly placed a kiss to your forehead. She said something in a different language, to which Tommy responded with a sharp nodd. 
Once everyone had piled out the front door, they took you up to your room. You hit the bed feeling more tired than you could ever remember.
_________________________________________
You slowly became more at ease around Tommy. Sitting alone at the table didn’t frighten you nearly as much. You heard him shout at people occasionally and that made you determined to keep your distance. 
It wasn't until Lizzie stayed away for a night getting stuck at Esme’s due to a storm. You assured her that you ate dinner and that everything was fine. In reality, you'd been sitting by the front window praying for her to come back. You hated storms and you’d just trusted that she’d be there and know what to do about it. 
Eventually you decided to retreat to your room to avoid any conflict. 
“Goodnight.” You poked your head into his study. 
“Night, love.” He responded kindly looking up from his papers. You thought about bothering him for a moment, telling him that you were scared. You decided to slip up to your bedroom instead. Girls your age didn't get scared of these types of things. 
Without Lizzie, there was an impending sense of doom about the place. Like there was pressure pushing down on you. Listening to things creak and shift, you had an idea that maybe without Lizzie here Grace’s ghost would try to snatch you up. 
Laying there listening to the storm and the house, your mind cooked up a story of revenge. Grace would kill you to get back at Lizzie for stealing her mourning husband. Maybe that’s why Lizzie’s baby wasn't born right. Your heart started to race as your stomach twisted.
There must have been some deeper story, Lizzie always seemed like she was very hurt by Grace, despite having come into Tommy’s life after. But Polly’s known Lizzie since she was a baby….
Questions were swirling in your mind non stop trying to make sense of it all. Your door made a horrid sscreeching sound and you let out a scream in response, pulling the blankets up above your head. 
“LEAVE ME ALONE GRACE.” You shouted hoping that it was enough that you could see it was her this whole time. She’d be deterred by your cleverness and the quilt Polly had made you. 
The quilt was tugged away from your face and you balled your fists ready to fight her off. However you looked up at Tommy’s horrified face instead. 
“I don’t do well with storms” You blurted out hoping that would make it better. You both looked at eachother for a moment.
“Let’s make some tea.” He said firmly. You knew that you’d fucked up and the last thing you wanted to do was have tea over the situation. You got up and he pulled your quilt around you, keeping his hand on your shoulder as you moved down the stair case. 
You watched him light a fire in the kitchen and grab two glasses and fill them with whiskey. 
He passed one to you and sat across from you, he took off his glasses and placed them on the table.
“Why do you think my first wife is out to get you?” He cut right to the chase.
“I got scared of the storm, and Lizzie is trapped, Grace- it’d be the perfect opportunity to get revenge on Lizzie for stealing her mourning husband.” You rushed the words out wishing you were dead. Tommy actually chuckled.
“That’s the story you’d been told then?” 
“No, just the one that made sense.” 
“How so?” He took a sip of whiskey. 
“Everyone says this place is some kind of shrine for her, Lizzie hates it. Hates her, why exactly,  I’m not sure but I know it’s because she’s hurt.” 
“Lizzie is hurt by Grace?” He asked with a wrinkled brow, you didn't think he was capable of such emotions. 
“That’s obvious.” You said sadly. He made a humming noise.
“I didn’t intend to marry Lizzie. She got pregnant and I married her.” He answered easily, suddenly you were very angry at him. Happy he did right by her and married her but - 
“Doesn’t mean she hasn’t always loved you.” You argued. 
“Is that so?” 
“Obviously. Have you ever looked at her? This place, the family, everything, me. Obviously.” You were dumbfounded. How on earth could someone so smart and sharp be so daft. “She puts up with a lot of shit around here. Not once has she ever mentioned leaving or hating you.” 
“Perhaps I should talk to her about it.” 
“You’d better. Everywhere we go men look at her.” You said trying to scare him into doing the right thing. 
“I’m sure they do, she’s a pretty woman.” He answered tensly. Suddenly you started to worry that maybe he wont ever love her, and if that was the case he would certainly never learn to love you. Panic started to wash over you.
“Do you want to watch the storm then?” 
“How?” You answered even more uneasy. He got up and you followed him through to the dark sitting room. He pulled the curtains open adding the slitghtest bit of light to the room. You helped him turn the couch around to face the big window. 
You watched him pour more wiskey and sit down motioning for you to do the same. Wrapped in Polly’s quilt you sat next to him and he put his arm around your shoulders.
“The only way to stop being scared is to face the thing that scares you.” He explained easily. He held you close to his side as you watched the dark figures of trees swaying violently. The lightening causing you to jump. Eventually things calmed down but you found yourself wishing that it would continue on so you could spend more time sitting like this. He just sat with you tucked into his side sipping his whiskey. 
“ I do care for you and Lizzie. More than anything.” He kissed the top of your head. “Things in the past weren't always easy or safe. Keeping her at arm's length seemed like the best way to keep her from ending up like Grace.” 
You listened to his voice in the dark, feelingthe pain in his words. 
“However, I would hate for her to leave me for a man at the shops.” He said lightly and you snorted. 
“Sorry for overstepping - I didn’t mean that she looked back at them” 
“S’alright.” He answered easily. Suddenly you saw headlights coming up the drive. You felt his body tense. “Hide behind the desk,” he said seriously. He grabbed a gun hidden in the paneling on the wall. You could hear the door open and to your relief, you heard Lizzie’s voice. 
“Fuck sake, Thomas! A gun! Scared the bloody life out of me!” She started to scold him but suddenly she stopped. “Are you alright? Where is she?! I knew something was wrong! Where-” her voice was muffled and you assumed it was because he was holding her.
“She’s fine, in the sitting room” He answered calmly.
“The sitting room at this hour!” 
You got up and moved back to the couch hoping that they might sit with you a while longer before going up to bed. 
“Why is the couch the wrong way?” She asked sitting down pulling you against her. “Miss me enough to sit up at the window like a couple of dogs.” 
“Something like that.” You said enjoying the way she held you tightly. Tommy came to sit down on the other side of you. His arm came across your shoulders pulling Lizzie towards you slightly. 
“Did you give her whiskey? She smells like distillery.”
“One glass to calm her nerves, won’t hurt her any.” You felt him reach over you to kiss the top of her head. 
“Alright. But don’t you go turning into your father.” She said sternly causing you to laugh. 
You sat for a while with the them till eventually the gray sky started to brighten with the sun of the next day. 
“Let’s get to bed. We can all get in a nap before the day starts.” Tommy said. Lizzie followed you through to your room to help you into bed and make sure you were okay. After you were settled you heard them talking down the hall and hoped that he was ready to face his fears. 
The next day you all had breakfast around noon in the kitchen. Lizzie and Tommy seemed in better spirits, might have had something to do with the marks on her neck, but you hoped he’d talked to her about the situation. 
After that night things were noticeably different. You went to school and tried to get along with the other kids, your marks were not great, leading to long nights in the kitchen studying extra with various family members. Esme was the best person to sit with, having learned maths and reading from her mother. She knew how to encourage you without stressing you out. 
Tommy on the other hand would look over the material and already look stressed. He always tried to keep his temper in check, but it was unbearable feeling him be frustrated with you. Eventually he caught on that you did worse with him there because of the added pressure, he learned to just sit next to you and work on his problems and offer you help when you needed it. 
It took a lot of struggling but eventually you were caught up and getting good marks. 
Things were going well till some old business needed to be handled. Tommy was to go away for two weeks, something that seemed to crush Lizzie. 
To her surprise he called her everynight. You’d watch her sitting on kitchen counter talking and occasionally laughing. Then he’d talk to you about school and the weather, telling you that he missed you. That was when you realised that something must be very wrong. He was clearly in a great deal of danger where ever he was. Polly came to stay at the house with Arthur, you enjoyed having them around but it only confirmed your suspicion. Everyone seemd it was best to keep you in the dark on the whole thing. 
 When he came back he was very different. Somebody, or some people, were most certainly dead. A great relief fell over the family and something was different about him. He had a smile on his face when she rushed to the door to greet him. You watched how they held eachother and thought back to when you’d first met them. Things were very different. You eventually butted into the hug feeling left out. 
______________
Extra Blurb. 
Eventually the unthinkable happened. The boy you had your eye on at school asked you out. Not knowing what to do or what the rules are you decided to get some more information on him make sure he was worth the risk of asking. 
Finn laughed at you.
“Not from the best family. But not a rival either, Tommy’s sure to have a fit, and Lizzie, I’m not sure. All in all, I don't mind the guy, you might be better off not telling them.” He said looking out the stained glass window of the Garrison. “If he gives you a hard time, come see me yeah? Don’t let him take you out of Small Heath” He looked at you seriously. 
“Sure thing.” You said getting up. You shouted a thank you over your shoulder rushing out of the pub. 
You thought long and hard about the situation. He made you laugh, didnt seem to care to much about your last name or who your dad was. Didn’t care that you were adopted. He was very polite, but enjoyed your peculiar sense of humor and misplaced words. 
You thought about turning him down. It was too complicated and anything that would upset your parents was too much of a burden. Thinking of what you would say to him, your heart gave a painful wrench. 
You went downstairs towards Tommy’s study. God this boy better be worth it or you’d put him in the ground. 
You poked your head in to see him writing and Lizzie sitting on the sofa reading a magazine. 
“Erm - So.” You started and watched them both look up at you. 
“What are you wearing?” Lizzie said smiling at your dress. 
“Go upstairs and change” Tommy cut you off before you could respond.
“Theres a boy -” You watched his face fall into his hands. “And he’s picking me up in a half hour if that’s allowed.” You fumbled with your words, wanting them to say yes badly.
“What boy” They said at the same time, giving eachother a glare. 
“Noah Solomons. I met him at school.” you responded expecting an explosion. 
“No. absolutley not. No way on earth am I sending you anywhere with him.” 
“Finn said he’s alright.” You started by stopped once he let out a sigh. 
“Finn! Fucking bastard.” He pinnched the bridge of his nose. 
“Where is he taking you then?” Lizzie asked
“Just around Small Heath for dinner. I told him that I can’t be out late.” Your face got red and you looked out the window.
“Put on a longer dress. The purple one, and put your hair up -” 
“Tommy! Don’t make her wear the purple one” Lizzie started to argue but stopped once she saw the look on his face. Her eyes narrowed back at him. 
“How bout I wear the red one -” 
“The black one is fine” They both answered suddently. 
“Just put on a cardigan,” Lizzie said getting up. “I have a nice one upstairs.” You followed her up to her bedroom. She pulled out a nice cardigan and some less opaque stockings. After you’d changed you looked yourself over, more modest, but that wasn't a bad thing. Especially if it got Tommy’s blood pressure back down. Lizzie got your hair up and you were grateful for her help. 
“Do you think dad will let me go?” You asked as she fixed your make up. 
“Dont think he can stop you. But, we’ve done business with his father. I think he’s worried this is apart of some elaborate plan.” 
“I don’t think so, but I’ll keep an eye on him” You were even more nervous now. Lizzie gave you lots of advice and you felt bad making her this worried. When you walked down stairs you could see Tommy talking to Noah at the door. 
You loved the way his face lit up when his eyes landed on you, he looked at you like you were the most beautiful thing in the world. You watched the front door swing shut, keeping him on the other side. 
“No.” He said firmly looking at Lizzie.
“Going to have to let her find her own way sometimes.” 
“No I don’t. Not with boys, not dressed like that.” He responded angrily. 
“Look, I told Finn where we are going, he said him and Isaiah would be around to keep an eye out. I’ve known him for the past two school years. I - please” You looked up at him in what you hoped were puppy dog eyes. You saw the conflict rage in his eyes.
“Fine.” He sighed in defeat. “But you don’t like something, anything, you call me from the restaurant and -” You cut him off with a big hug. 
“I won’t be out too late. Love ya” You said flying out the door before he could change his mind. 
__
He kissed you on the cheek on the door step, promising to take you out again next weekend. After saying goodnight you watched as he drove down the drive way before opening the front door.
You were surprised at how quiet it was. You slipped your shoes off and followed the lamp light into the sitting room. Much like the day with the storm, they sat on the sofa turned around to face the large window. You moved towards them to see your dad looking beyond relieved, and mum asleep on his lap. 
“So how was it then?” He asked you handing you the last bit of whiskey in his glass. You sat down next to him, watching him look you over for anything out of place. 
“Felt a bit like the Queen to be honest. More Blinders than people in that restaurant. Not to mention people watching from their windows.” You gave him a look as he started out the window. “But he was nice. I -He is nice, I enjoyed myself”
“Just for food then straight back?” 
“You already know that’s what happened. Can you help me get the pins out of my hair?” You turned away from him and felt him struggle to find them, pulling slightly too hard. 
“What? No, this is my job hands off.” Lizzie said groggily. “What did I miss? Tell me everything.” You felt the two of them shift and Lizzie's expert hands start bringing your hair down. By the time she’d gotten it brushed Polly and Esme had showed up for a full debrief in the kitchen. 
You were giggling like mad for hours with them, hearing their stories about past lovers. Some sweet, other cautionary. Eventually it was time for bed and you stopped into Tommy’s office before going to wash up. 
“Dad.” He gave you a shocked look then you realised what you had said. You didnt feel like apologizing though, too tired to make a big deal of it. You leaned over and gave him a hug. “Thanks for letting me go tonight.” You felt his arms wrap around you tightly. 
“I don't like it, and there will be lots to talk about tomorrow. But I'm happy that you're happy.” You kissed his cheek then headed up to bed. You knew that he’d probably already called Noah’s father, a tense conversation awaited you, but you had no doubt it was because he loved you.
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ragingbookdragon · 3 years
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What Is A Mother, But The Woman Who Loves Us Most?
A Batmom x Batfamily One-Shot
Word Count: 3.3K Warnings: Angst
Author's Note: I know there is a story like this already (by a different author) but I should preface that this is a story that I posted a year or so before but deleted my previous blog last year, so it's not going to seem like it. I haven't copied any ideas, this is my own that I posted a year or so ago, and re-posting again now. -Thorne
You are not my mother!
The loathing words came out of his mouth before he could stop them, and he watched the cave go deathly quiet around him. Everyone's eyes were wide, even hers, but a millisecond later, they set in a hard stare as she stood straight, her jaw tightening.
She nodded, staring at him. "You're right Damian. I'm not Talia al Ghul. I'm not your mother. But I will tell you what I am." She raised her left hand, flashing the silver wedding ring on her finger. "I'm your father's wife. And what I tell you to do in this manor is what I expect from you."
He shook his head in anger, glaring at her. "This is my father's manor!"
"No Damian, this is the Wayne Manor. And I've been, to use a rather weathered term, the lady of the house for almost fifteen years. Long before you were even a thought in Talia's mind." He stopped and she crossed her arms. "I may not be your mother, but you are a child and your father and I are the adults. When you turn eighteen, you can make all the decisions you want. Until then, what we say goes."
His lips drew in a taut line and she added, "I've already talked about it to Bruce. You're not allowed on patrol after what happened at the gala. If you want to complain to him about it, he's going to tell you the same thing." Her eyes shifted to the others, then she looked back at him one last time before turning around and walking up the stairs.
When she was gone, he let out a shout in anger and threw silver coffee pot against the cave wall. It hit the wall with a clang and dropped, rolling on the ground a few times as it spilled its contents, much like his mood.
He felt their eyes on them and he whipped his head up, glaring at them. "What?!"
Tim and Jason simply narrowed their eyes at him, but Dick walked forward and knelt in front of him. "Kiddo, that wasn't a nice thing to say to mom."
Damian scoffed at him before shoving past, climbing up the stairs. “Like the three of you haven't said that to her before." There was no return to his statement, giving him all the answer, he needed.
***
He stepped out of the study stretching his arms and listening to the sound of his bones popping before he shifted, moving towards the door. The boys had left a few minutes earlier to catch a rerun of an episode of Vikings, leaving him alone in the cave.
Alfred walked up to him, handing him a sweater before motioning to the door. "Mrs. Wayne has taken a seat out on the patio. I suspect you'll wish to see her."
Bruce nodded, taking the sweater from him before thanking him and moving out of the study and towards the patio. He crossed into the living room as he did, stopping to stare at his four sons passed out on the couch. The TV was still going, so he leaned down, gently taking the remote from Dick's hand and shutting it off.
He set the remote down and started his path again, but stopped when he heard, "You going to check on mom?" He turned around, looking at a his oldest.
Bruce nodded, taking in the sight of Dick’s arms wrapped around all of his brothers. “After you boys told me what happened, I thought I should talk to her about it."
Dick nodded, reaching up and rubbing his eyes, careful not to wake the others beside him. "He didn't mean it...he'll see that when he gets over being angry."
Bruce nodded and leaned over, ruffling his hair. “Tell Jason that you two should stay at the manor tonight...it's too late for you to head home anyway."
Dick started to argue, but a look from his father and quick, “Your mother would have a fit if you two tried to drive home now or later…you know that.”
His son nodded and Bruce turned around once more, this time making his way to the dimly lit patio. His hand curled around the cool metal handle of the sliding glass door, and he quietly opened it, stepping out onto the deck. She lay on the porch swing, covered by a heavy hound’s tooth blanket, with a barely full wine glass in her hand.
He walked towards her and bent over, picking up the wine bottle; he shook it lightly before quipping, "I can't believe you've drank an entire bottle in one sitting."
As if finally noticing his presence, she tipped her head lazily to him and mumbled, "It's empty?"
He snorted and tipped the bottle upside down. "As it was the day before it was bottled."
Bruce paused and grinned as she huffed a laugh and brought the glass she had in her hand up to her mouth. He watched her down the rest of her red wine before she set the glass on the table; he set the bottle beside it and shifted her forward, easing his way behind her until they were both comfortable. She rested her back against his chest, her head dropping against his shoulder. His arms came up around her as he pulled the blanket up to her neck, keeping her warm.
He was quiet for a second then he murmured, "...The boys told me what happened earlier."
There was a moment of silence, then she whispered, "I know I should be used to it after hearing it come from each of them..." She stopped, then continued with, "But it still stings to hear it."
A sad smile crossed his lips as he pressed his lips to her temple. "Of course it stings (Y/N)...you're their mother and you love them." After he didn't receive a response from her, he tipped his head and looked down. "(Y/N)? Love?" She turned her head, and he took in the sight of the tears in her eyes; his face fell at the sight and he brought a hand up, cupping her cheek. "Oh…sweetheart."
(Y/N) choked out a sob and pressed her face into the crook of his neck as she clenched a hand in his sweater. Bruce rested his chin on the top of her head as he rubbed her back, comforting her with quiet words.
***
Damian watched them from the screen door, feeling his heart clench in his chest at the sight of (Y/N) sobbing. He swallowed thickly and stepped back, only to come into contact with someone—something. He let out a quiet gasp and spun around, seeing Dick staring sadly out at his parents, Tim and Jason behind him doing the same.
Damian looked at them and whispered, "What are you three doing?"
Dick glanced at him briefly before motioning to them. "We heard the sliding door open, and we went to listen."
"I didn't know you were eavesdroppers."
A hand came up and cuffed him upside the head; he held his head, glaring at Jason who bit out, "Shut up, two-bit. You were eavesdropping too."
Damian opened his mouth to retort, but shut it and turned back around, looking at her. A moment passed, then he mumbled, "You said the same thing I did." He looked up at his brothers, who wore clouded expressions; each of them nodded after a few seconds, and he asked, "What happened?"
Dick was the first to speak, remembering a time from when he was a mere ten years old.
***
He stomped angrily through the house, not even caring about her following him; she called after him repeatedly. "Dick. Dick, honey, stop for a second."
He didn't listen, still moving. "No! You grounded me!"
"And I grounded you for a reason. You deliberately disobeyed me." He grunted at her and she called out, her voice ringing with authority, "Richard John Grayson. Not another step young man." He stopped at it and she continued, "You left the cave tonight and went on patrol without asking. As your mom-"
He spun around, his eyes angered as he spit, "You're not my mom! Stop acting like it!" Her mouth shut, and her eyes went wide from the declarations.
She blinked, obviously stunned at his words, and she stared down at her hands murmuring, "I may not be your real mother...but I...I am...I..." She drew off, bringing a hand up to wipe at her cheek. Dick's widened when she looked up at him, and he saw the tears beginning to spill, running down her cheeks.
He raised his hands out to her. "Wait! I—I didn't mean it!"
(Y/N) looked down and she brought a hand up to her mouth, moving past him, letting out a broken, 'excuse me'. He watched her go past him, then a few moments later, Bruce walked into the room and he turned to him.
"Bruce!" Bruce looked down at him, taking in the sight of Dick, who was almost in tears.
The lecture he had ready for him went out the window as he squatted in front of Dick. "Dick?"
The boy looked up at him, tears filling those big blue eyes. "I—I messed up B-Bruce."
He reached out a hand, wiping his tears away. "What happened Dick?"
Dick lowered his head and he whispered, "I a—accidently told (Y/N) that she wasn't my m-mom."
Bruce sighed at him and murmured, “Oh, Dick." The boy began to sob, and Bruce reached out, pulling him into a hug. "It's okay, bud."
***
Dick looked at her and murmured, "I've never forgotten the look she gave me after I said it to her..." He looked down at Damian, and said, "And neither has she."
Jason nodded at that. "I'm sure she's never forgotten how I left the cave telling her I had to go find my real mom.
***
"What are you looking at baby?"
He jerked forward, clicking the screen to minimize the images. "Nothing!" He spun around to see her walking towards him, an amused smile on her face.
"And I'm assuming that nothing is not important?" She questioned.
He nodded. "Not at all."
She stared at him until he sighed and turned around, clicking the screen to reveal the images of the three women; she walked up to him. "Who are these women?"
He pointed to each one. "Sharmin Rosen, Lady Shiva, and Sheila Haywood."
(Y/N) nodded, looking at them. "They're very pretty women." She paused and looked at him. "But why are you looking at them." He dropped his gaze and picked at his fingers. "Jason? Hon?"
He looked back up at her. "One of them is my mom."
Her eyes widened as she said, "Like...your biological mom?"
He nodded. "I found out after I went back to my old apartment." He looked between the screen and (Y/N). "I'm gonna track them down." She was silent, her eyes moving to the screen, and he turned to her, rising from the chair. "I have to go find them...I have to go find my real mom."
***
"And those were the last words I ever said to Ma." They stared at Jason as he leaned against a table by the door. "And it got a lot worse when I came back...I said horrible things to Ma...about her not caring...about her not being a mother." He went silent and shook his head. "I fucked up a lot of things between us for a good couple years."
Tim watched him, then nodded. "I hadn't even realized I'd actually said it to mom...it was such an offhanded comment that I didn't even know what I said until she was gone."
***
He barely registered the sound of his bedroom door opening, let alone the sound of her footsteps as she walked up to him. He did, however, hear the disappointment in her tone as she said, "Timmy...you need to go to bed."
He shook his head, typing on the keyboard. "I'm fine."
"Honey, you've been awake for almost forty-eight hours." She rested a hand on his shoulder. "It's not good for your body if you stay up like this."
"I'm fine. Really, I'm good."
She squeezed his shoulder, the other hand reaching out to close the laptop. "You'll be good when you're asleep in bed." Skimming the top of this laptop, she stopped when his curled around her wrist.
He turned to her and said, "Will you stop mothering me? I'm fine. I don't need your help."
He let go of her and turned back to the screen, barely registering the way she quietly whispered, “Alright Timmy...goodnight”, and walked out of his room.
***
"The only reason I actually realized what I said was after a few minutes, I realized that she hadn't told me she loved me after saying good night." He paused, digging a groove into the carpet with his toes. "Mom didn't say anything about it the next day, but I could tell that something had shifted. She was more reserved when it came to me." He looked at Damian. "Look, I know you and I don't get along, but I'm going to tell you something brother to brother. Go apologize to mom and tell her that you didn't mean it."
It was all he said before he looked at the others and waved. "I'm going to bed.
Jason soon followed saying, "I'm with Timbers. I'm gonna go crash."
The two of them began making their way to their rooms when the sound of the screen door opening and closing brought their attention back. They looked towards it, seeing Bruce carrying (Y/N), her head pressed against his chest.
He stopped when he saw them, his surprised look giving way to a hard expression. "Were you four watching?" They all started making excuses, but he shushed them, nodding at their sleeping mother; they shut their mouths and he brought his foot back, sliding the door closed.
"Is mom alright?"
Bruce looked at Dick and nodded. "She's fine. Wine drunk...but fine." He looked down at Damian. "(Y/N) does a lot for all of us. You owe her an apology when she wakes up." Damian nodded, watching as he walked past them, carrying her up the stairs to their bedroom.
***
The dull throb in her head told her the migraine was something she was going to need some aspirin, water, and a heavy blanket to block out the light to fix. She groaned lightly as she burrowed her face in her pillow, then she opened her eyes and looked around the room.
Immediately, she took in the sight of the four of her boys curled up like cats in the bed with her. A smile graced her lips and she reached down beside her hip, running a hand over Tim's head; he shifted in his sleep, burying his face in her side and she struggled to bite back the laugh that wanted to come out. She reached over again and ran her hands through Dick and Jason's hair, watching them do the same.
She smiled at them, then a voice sounded from beside her. "Are you awake, Umi?" (Y/N) looked to her side, seeing Damian curled up beside her. Bruce's broad shoulders made him look so tiny from where he was laying and she nodded, raising a hand and caressing his head.
"I'm awake, sweetheart." He nodded, then moved under her arm, resting his head on her shoulder. Her arm settled comfortably around him, and she brought up her hand, gently running her fingers through his short hair.
After a few moments he whispered, "...I'm sorry, Umi."
Her response was to press her lips to his forehead, and murmur, "I know, baby."
He swallowed thickly, feeling the beginnings of tears gathering in his eyes. "I didn't mean to say it."
She nodded; her lips still pressed to his forehead. "I know you didn't, sweetheart. It was something said in anger."
He moved to sit up, looking up at her as he whispered harshly, "But I have hurt you! I made you cry! I...did this." He dropped his gaze, closing his eyes, and (Y/N) watched the tears begin to fall down his cheeks. He looked back up at her a few seconds later and said, "You are my mother, Umi...you are the only mother I've known."
(Y/N) shifted, careful not to wake her sons, then she cupped Damian's cheeks in her hands. "Baby...it's okay...I'm not angry at you."
He shook his head in her grip. "But you're sad because I said you weren't my mother."
(Y/N) brushed her thumbs under his eyes, wiping away the tears. "We all say things that we don't mean." He looked up at her and she searched his eyes. "What matters is that when they are said, we try our best to fix what we've done wrong."
Damian nodded his head and whispered, "I'm sorry, Umi."
A sad smile crossed her lips and she leaned forward, kissing his forehead. "I am too, baby." She pulled away and brushed his cheeks again. "I still love you though...with all my heart."
"You do? Even after what I said?"
(Y/N) nodded, pulling him to her; he rested his head under her chin, and she wrapped her arms around him as she murmured, "The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness." She brought up a hand, caressing the side of his head as she whispered, "Each of you has told me as some point that I am not what I am. But I know deep down that none of you meant it. And each time I heard it, it hurt...but forgiveness is a good thing when used."
"To err is human...to forgive...divine."
She smiled at his quote and squeezed him gently. "I love you, Damian...my beautiful baby boy."
The feeling of tears gathered in his eyes, but he blinked them away, his hand clenching in her shirt as he replied, "I love you too, Umi."
There was a moment of silence between them until, "How come the demon-spawn gets all the love? We were here first."
Damian raised his head, glaring at Tim. "I am Umi's favorite, Drake."
"The hell you are, Tater-tot. If anyone's the favorite, it's me."
"I think you're wrong, Little-wing. Iwas the first. I'm the favorite."
"No one asked you, dickhead."
"Mom! Jason called me a mean name!"
"Mom! Jason called me a mean name!"
"Stop mocking me!"
"Stop mocking me!"
"Mom!"
"Mom!"
(Y/N) rolled her eyes at her two oldest as they began to shove at each other, and eventually, Tim and Damian got into the mess, and she watched their fists and feet fly at each other.
A grunt sounded from beside her and she looked down to see her husband glaring at her. "You just had to get them going this early, didn't you, Mrs. Wayne?"
(Y/N) let out a 'pfft' and leaned down, pressing her lips to his before laying her head on his arm, their foreheads touching. "Yeah...but I know that when they're fighting like this, they're giving each other love."
"Tough love."
She snorted and tickled his side, feeling him jerk away. "But love nonetheless."
He opened his mouth to respond, but the sound of someone grunting cut him off. "Mom! Jason won't let me out of this headlock!"
"Mom! Jason won't let me-"
"STOP MOCKING ME, JASON!"
"You're unbearable, Drake! I am Umi's favorite!"
"Keep telling yourself that, oompa-loompa."
"I am not an oompa-loompa!"
(Y/N) sighed and looked at her husband. "Never a dull morning, is it Mr. Wayne?"
He grinned at her but grunted when one of them hit his side. "No, it's not Mrs. Wayne. No, it is not."
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