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sarahsangelicdoll · 11 hours ago

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thinking about Rafe and somno (x/twitter p link !! don’t open in public)

cw; consensual somnophilia, dubcon, s1 Rafe, hints at ‘good girl’ reader, not exactly like the video but that’s ok 😅, soft!Rafe, wasn’t intended but he’s highkey soft in this 😅, unprotected p n v(always use protection!!) but Rafe pulls out.

a/n: wasn’t intending on making this so lovely dovey and soft but it is and tbh i’m not complaining 😭

Rafe snuck in through your window, having previously been waiting for about ten minutes in his truck for you. His messages going through and on read but no reply from you. Why didn’t he walk through the door like a normal person? Well because your parents were curled up on the couch next to each other watching whatever old, rich, obnoxiously fake, stuck up rich people watched. Probably similar to the bullshit shows his parents watched.

He grunted as his feet landed on the floor and he finally hopped himself into your room. making a mental note to find an easier way up to your window. Just as he was about to speak and ask you why the fuck you weren’t responding to him he saw you on your bed, still in your clothes from earlier that day, phone in hand and sleeping away. He smirked slightly as he took in your sleeping figure, looking all pretty. He strolled over to your bed and took your charging phone out of your hand on onto the bedside table, about to shake you awake before he recalled something.

That something being a post-sex conversation he had with you about a month ago. How you went on about how hot it would be if you woke up to him using you and that your body was ‘free to use’ even if you were sleeping. Perhaps it turned you on too much- even expressing being comfortable with the usage of roofie pills(Which Rafe respectfully stated that he’ll never do nor is comfortable with). But he’d be lying if he said the thought of waking you up with his cock when you least expect it didn’t get him worked up. But lying he did, hence why he’s waited so long to surprise you, wanting you to think he wasn’t into it.

Rafe bit his lip as his eyes trailed down your figure. He knew fucking you awake would be risky to do with your parents down stairs- but that just made the situation even hotter, and it’s Rafe- why would he care?

So within just a couple seconds his clothes were discarded and he was climbing onto your bed. His movements careful as to not wake you. He rested on his knees as his hands roamed up and down your curves, stopping to squeeze the flesh of your hip. He sucked in a shaky and lustful deep breath as he hooked his finger under the waistband of your shirts and pulled them down along with your panties. Shifting your legs slightly to string the fabric off of your body and then throwing them off somewhere on the ground. Rafe bit his lip as he eyed your glistening, pretty folds, running a finger through them while his other hand gently placed itself back onto your ass and squeezed.

He shifted position again once your shorts and panties were off. Resting on his side. He reached over your body to lift your legs up further into your body in an almost sitting like position. Rafe let out a quiet groan as fisted his cock in his hand, looking down at your bare and vulnerable pussy.

Lifting his hand up to his mouth, Rafe spit into it and brought his hand back down to his cock and wrapped his hand around the base to spread the spit as a type of lube, his cock twitching at the pleasureful sensation. Rafe took his time as he shifted in his spot to easily run his cock up and down through your pussy folds, tapping the head of his cock against your clit. A smirk made its way onto Rafes face as he felt your body twitch at the sensation.

He teased himself as he circled the tip of his cock around your hole before sinking himself in, quickly biting his lip to stifle a loud moan from escaping his mouth as the warmth and tightness of your pussy enveloped his cock. Rafes mouth fell open in a quiet moan once he fully sheaved himself into your tight cunt. He had to wait a bit both for you and him: Him to get a grip on reality, already feeling like he’s in heaven and for your sleeping body to get used to it.

Once Rafe finally starts moving he has to bite his lip to prevents moans from spilling out of his lips. He couldn’t help himself from glancing up towards the door, heightening the pleasure and even a hint of fear at the thought of your parents waking up to see their perfect, innocent and precious daughter getting used in their sleep. His thrusts stayed more on the gentle and slow side but steady pace, planting his larger hand on the flesh of your ass and squeezing lightly.

He couldn’t help but admire your sleeping position, hair messy and thrown around your pillows. Breathing steady and gentle. Dreaming about god knows what.

Rafes breathing got more breathy and quick as he felt you shift slightly and pussy clench around his cock. But it wasn’t enough, he needed to be deeper and in your plushy walls. So he shifted his position once again, hovering his body over yours as he kept himself up by his fists, planted on either side of you. His body was practically caging yours as he breathed in your scent. The new position letting Rafe fuck you both easier and deeper. Your walls felt so good around him and the slower pace felt like a tease due to the lack of your moans, noises n reactions to help him get off, so he couldn’t help but speed up his pace.

And that’s when you woke up, pussy clenching around him as you felt yourself regain consciousness from your nap, dazed and confused before you immediately felt something fucking itself into you and someone else’s body heat along your side. In your confused state you didn’t think properly and simply felt panicked when you looked and saw someone else’s body over you.

Rafe was too lost in the pleasure to pay attention to you waking up, missing the way your heartbeat sped up along with your breathing. He then froze slightly as he felt your hair shift against his face, lifting his head up to see the panic quickly settling onto your features. He stopped his thrusts and quickly darted his hand up to your mouth, preventing any noises before they even came.

“Hey- hey, just me babe.” He whispered, though his tone was slightly panicked itself, his own heartbeat speeding up.

Your eyes darted up to his as you heard his words, immediately feeling a wave of both relief and arousal come over you. Rafe grinned as he felt your breathing and heartbeat slow down and your eyes become wide with lust instead of fear, letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. His hand moved from your face down to your waist and squeezed lightly, grin still plastered on his face as he lowered his head down to your neck, breathing in your scent before speaking teasingly through kisses. “Good nap?”

You let out a yawn, followed by a moan as his thrusts picked up again and he started placing soft kisses to your neck. “Yeah… even better was when i woke up.” You teased back, grinning slightly as your hands made way to his hair.

Rafe chuckled as he brought his head back up from your neck, typical cocky grin spread on his face. “Imagine how your parents would feel if they walked into me fucking their perfect daughter? And finding out she asked for it previously.” He continued to tease, leaning back up to put enough space between his and your bodies to allow him to push your body down onto your back instead of your side, moving your leg over as well before he enveloped your body into his again. Rafe’s elbows resting on either side of your body.

Leaning down, Rafe captured your lips into a kiss before you could come out with some smart comeback. His hips rocking back into yours as his hands explored your curves. The usually agonizingly slow position feeling very pleasurable in this moment.

You two simply enjoyed each other’s company. Rafe moving his head back down into your neck to mark what’s his and hide the sounds of his own grunts and heavy breathing. You wrapped your legs around his hips as you let out soft but pleasure filled moans. Every sound you make sounding like absolute heaven.

“So pretty..” Rafe murmured into your neck as he glanced up at you, cheeks flushed as he bit his lip before speaking again. “Especially for just waking up.”

Your face flushed even more at his words as you giggled, biting your lip slightly as you looked down at him. “And you’re handsome.” You complimented cheekily, playing with strands of his hair. Rafe let out a shaky breath mixed with a moan at your words. Biting your neck as his pace slowly became less steady and more quick, signalling that he was about to cum.

Rafes hand found way down to your clit as he started rubbing quick circles on the bundle of nerves. Your own moans raising in frequency and pitch as you felt the sudden, overwhelming sensation on your clit, unmatching to his thrusts. It was such a perfect combination that made you feel like you were about to cum and go up to heaven in seconds.

You grabbed a fistful of Rafes hair as you felt that knot in your stomach slowly come closer and closer to snapping, letting Rafe know in a high pitched, attempting to be quiet breath. “Oh fuck.. ‘mma cum imma cum-“ You chanted, legs wrapping tighter around his hips as you squealed at Rafes fingers increasing their rushed pace on your clit.

“Yeah? me too baby, c’mon.” He said breathlessly, cock twitching inside you at your words. Placing one last sloppy, open mouthed kiss to your neck before letting out a loud moan, quickly pulling out as his cum decorated your stomach and pyjama shirt in long, white, sticky strings of cum. Your own arousal escaping you in clear liquid, absolutely soaking both your sheets and Rafes lower half.

The two of yours loud breaths were the only sound that filled the room as you both came down from your highs. Needless to say; that felt fucking amazing. Perhaps it was all the mix of taboo things; fucking upstairs while your parents watched tv and Rafe fucking you while you were asleep.

Rafe let out a breathy chuckle as he placed a kiss against your cheek and pulled away. Looking down at the absolute mess you made. He grinned as he glanced down at you; “Squirted from this?” He asked, teasing you as if that wasn’t one of the most pleasurable orgasms he’s had.

You grinned back up at him as squeezed your legs together playfully to cover yourself. Nodding at his words, completely tired, blissed and fucked out. “Yeah, was so hot to wake up to that.” You said with an un-matching innocent sounding giggle. Stretching your arms over your head as you yawned.

“Yeah? that a sign i should sneak in and fuck you while you’re sleeping with your parents downstairs more often?” Rafe teased, Shifting to throw one leg off the bed and reach for a random article of clothing to dry the two of yous up.

“Yes.” You replied simply but tiredly, watching as he grabbed the piece of clothing, yawning yet again as sleep again threatened to take over your body.

Rafe couldn’t help but smile genuinely as he looked back at you and saw your sleepy expression. Leaning up and forward to give you a goodnight. “‘mk, now go back to sleep, i’ll clean this shit up.”

⟡ ݁₊ . written by sarahsangelicdoll, 2025 on tumblr! © do not repost on any third party website or repost as yours

⟡ ݁₊ . tagging muts: @moonlightrafe @bloodibambiidoll @winnie1emon @cameronsprincess @hvnlygrl

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meanbossart · 2 days ago

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hi rj! i’ve been following you for a couple of months now and i’m actually obsessed with your art and du drow 😭 i saw your recent post/reply to an ask about your favorite art from last year and for the comic, you put old habits. naturally i had to read it again and couldn’t help but wonder (and sorry if you’ve replied to this before), but what does du drow’s voice sound like?

you have such a knack for writing natural-sounding dialogue and as a writer i am SO envious hahah, and whenever you add dialogue to your art pieces i imagine drow speaking with a low timbre or baritone voice?? do you perhaps have a voice actor’s voice in mind for drow? and god i know hope this man has some sort of accent or “curve” to the end of his words (i say this as someone who speaks 3 languages and sounds different in every single one)!!

Hello! Oh, I apologize for what may be a very boring answer, but DU drow's voice is simply intended to read as the Dark Urge's voice (number 5, I believe) that the game defaults to when you pick that origin.

That's the voice I had to listen to it throughout the entirety of the game, all hundred-something hours, every time I clicked on the guy, had him attack, crouch, or start a dialogue. Neil Roberts' cadence and accent has been seared into my brain and I can't hear it as anything else. The "flair" of DU drow's sentences and vocabulary is also modeled entirely after what the game's acting provides for a dark urge character. I guess the ONLY note I could make is that he's about 10% less intense during normal conversation.

(voice 5 starts at 7:07)

youtube

So, deep voice, very gravelly, and a pronounced - and surprisingly a little posh - english accent. He performs a sort of rugged elderness, (he's always made sure to sound older than he actually is) enunciates carefully, and speaks slowly. He's far more casual around people he's close to (unless he's trying to woo them, of course) and knows to talk simpler and softer with children - in general, he has very good control over his words and delivery, though he gets swept in emotion half the time after being tadpoled.

#ask #du drow lore

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onlymexsarah · 9 hours ago

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Burning Flames V || Eris Vanserra

Pairing: Eris Vanserra x Archeron!reader Summary: Since you became High Fae there were only two things that scared you: your deadly power and your attraction toward the male you should hate most after Tamlin, Eris Vanserra. Warnings: Eris thinking important stuff, Eris being Eris, probably grammar mistakes and my english. A/n: I’M SO SORRY FOR THE WAITING. I had a writer’s block and i didn’t want to write anything that would disappoint you. I hope you’re gonna like this, let me know if you want to be added at the taglist🫶🏻 Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

As soon as you all arrived at the River House the mood lightened up. It was time to truly celebrate the Winter Solstice, and Feyre's birthday.

You were all in the sitting room, and when you said all you meant all. Even Nesta and Lucien were there, throught you thought that the presence of the latter was not entirely because his fondness to the Inner Circle.

You took a moment to look around you and letting the sight sink. They were all happy, everyone was talking about something and everyone had a smile on their faces. It was refreshing being in such a familiar occasion, but somehow you couldn't help but feel a bit of melancholy.

Feyre had found a beautiful family. Not perfect, because no one was perfect, but she had found people who loved her and would do anything for her. They would do anything for each other, and even if being Feyre's sister made you part of the group you knew you would never be more than that: Feyre's sister.

You had no special bond with anyone. Only Rhysand and Mor had taken interest in developing a relationship with you, but as you watched them talk with Cassian and Azriel you knew that you could never compare with that. The Winter Solstice was the night for wishes, and you deeply wished to find a family like that one day.

When the time of gifts arrived you were excited. When your family had fallen into poverty there was no money for gifts, so you had spent your birthdays and the holydays as normal days.

You had found out that you loved making gifts. It had something magical the whole searching the right things for everyone and find it. The one yuo were proudest was an enchated satchel for Nesta, where she could put every book she wanted and bring it with her weightless.

You had received gifts from almost everyone. but it was when Mor handed you a box wrapped with expensive, sparkling red silk that your heart skipped a beat. "I think someone is quiet fascinated by you after only few dances." said Mor smugly and she read from who it was from.

You tried to steady your hands and you took the gift and read the little note that was attached to it.

"A reminder that flames are the apotheosis of beauty if shaped by the right person. Happy Solstice, Eris."

You slowly unwrapped the delicate silk and opened the box. Your eyes widened as you caught what was inside. Everyone's attention was on you as you took the glass case that was inside the box and hold it in your hand in front of your face.

You felt everyone's breath stopping as you stared at the beautiful rose made of fire that burned inside the glass.

The glass was warm, and the fire was perfectly shaped as a rose, forever burning on its own. Something inside you flickered, something gold, soft that a moment before was not there. You didn't know what to say as every word disappeared from your mind. It was breathtaking. The beauty of it could not be compared to anything else you had ever seen.

"At least he has good taste for gifts." Mor commented crossing her arms.

You put the glass case on the table in front of you and quickly looked away from it, giving a Mor a tight smile. "What? Having second thoughts?" you said ironically to her, needing to change subject.

She snorted. "Hardly."

"Let's just appreaciate the kind gesture." Rhysand said with an amused smile. "Thanks to you we have his alliance back, let's celebrate that."

It didn't go unnotice to you your sister's tight expression. From the way she looked at Rhysand and the smile he gave her you were sure they were having a mental conversation, about what you didn't know.

The night passed smoothly, there had been no other awkward gifts thankfully. At some point your eyes threatened to close on their own so you excused yourself and went into your room.

You put the rose on the vanity in your room, and for a moment stared at it like it could explode. If Eris wanted to mess with your head then he was doing a great job.

You scoffed, fuck you Eris.

You swear you heard his low laugh deep inside you.

***

When a letter in red paper came for you with only a place and a time written on it you stormed into Rhysand's office, guilt eating you alive. You opened the door without so much as knocking, and told him everything.

You told him how Eris saved you during the war, how you had cured him because yes your power didn't go away but "my sisters lied too so you can't be angry at me". You showed him your hands and arms. You told him that Eris knew about your power but never said anything or threated you, and in the end you told him about the bargain you made.

"You were letting yourself burning from the inside out because you were scared to hurt someone?" Rhysand's voice was not in any way angry, actually he seemed more concerned.

You shrugged, your eyes fell on the ground feeling his heavy gaze on you. "You were all so happy after the war. My sisters still needed me and I didn't want to ruin anyone's happiness with this problem. I would have figured out something, eventually."

Rhysand stared at you silently, a mischievious spark in his violet eyes. "And you thought that making a bargain with Eris was the solution?"

His question wasn't accusatory. It sounded like Rhysand was curious about your maddness, and honestly you were too. There was no right answer to make it sound reasonable, so you gave him part of the truth.

"When he chose me to dance the responsability to keep him as an ally had fallen on me, and unfortunately I couldn't seduce him like Nesta would have done." You shrugged. "Cassian was right, Eris seems to enjoy to annoy me. When he proposed to train me I took it as my chance to keep him close to the Night Court and keep him close as an ally."

"And are you comfortable with this...arrangement?" Rhysand asked you carefully.

You noticed how his reaction had been completely different from what you had expected. You thought that he would look at you like the stupid girl you felt, almost pitying you for talking about Eris like he was not a monster. Instead, Rhysand had just listened, nodded and gave you an encouraging smile.

"Yeah, I'll need one of you to winnow me where we'll meet, but I would prefer if you tell no one but Feyre and Azriel." You said and saw in Rhysand's eyes that he understood the double meaning of your words:

"I don't want Mor to find out, for now."

"It can be easily arranged, but since you'll start to spend time on your own around Prythian I must ask you to start training with Cassian and Azriel whenever you can." he said kindly sitting on the chair behind his desk.

You tilted your head with a grin. "Are you asking as my High Lord or as a worried friend?"

"What about as a brother?" he matched your grin. "An overbearing one, as Feyre calls me."

You chuckled. "I'll start training with them tomorrow."

***

"Your brooding silence is louder than Nesta and Cassian during Winter Solstice." You snorted watching with almost disgust all the flowers around you. The border between the Spring's court and the Summer's court was a explosion of yellow, pink, orange and purple. All colours that made your eyes almost hurt.

You felt Azriel's death glare on your back as you pointly avoided his eyes. "I still have to understand why Rhys think letting you be alone with him is a good idea."

"Because Rhysand would be a hypocrite to deny me of this lovely bargain." An amused, deep voice said behind you making your toes curling in your shoes.

You turned around and saw Azriel watching Eris like he was imaginaing stabbing him, and somehow you knew you were right. "I'll stay with you." said the shadowsinger as if Eris' presence just reminded him how a bad idea that was.

"Tempting, but I'm not usually one who like to share." Said Eris with a cocky grin before looking at you. "Unless the lady wants to."

You narrowed your eyes at him, crossing your arms. It was annoying how most of the times you didn't know if Eris was flirting with you or trying to rile you up.

"Go Az." You looked at the shadowsinger with a kind smile. "I'll be fine."

"I'll be back in few hours." Azriel said to you before winnowing away, giving Eris one last warning look.

You watched for a few seconds the place where Azriel had been standing and took a deep breath. "Over the centuries I forgot how dramatic he could be."

You snapped your eyes on Eris, making a good effort to not notice how his green outfit made his eyes look of an impossible shade of emerald.

"He just doesn't trust you." you said ironically. "I wonder why."

Eris gave you a feline grin before offering you his arm. "There is a lake near by, shall we?"

You studied his arm with wary eyes. Inside you there were two sides that were fighting each other. The first one wanted to give him the chance that no one ever did, to trust him and gain his trust back, to get to know the Eris that if you tried hard you could see under his mask; the other part was yelling at you to not be stupid, that if the Inner Circle didn't trust him after five centuries there were very good reasons, and the worst part was that you knew most of them, and still it wasn't enough to make you feel even a hint of disgust.

So you had to pretend.

"Let's just get started." you hoped that your cold mask was at least half good as his as you walked past him toward the lake, ignoring his low chuckle.

***

From your sister's story of her training you had expected everything but this.

Eris had made you sat right in front of the lake with your leg crossed, your back straight and your eyes closed while he did the same beside you and gave you instruction with his voice.

He had told you to focus on your breathing while you had to map the environment around you just with your hearing. Was it even possible?

Spoiler: no.

Everytime you heard a sound your mind would wander around with random thoughts that become a deep dive inside your head. The birds over you reminded you of the days that your father used to bring you around the forest close to your old estate. Who knew who lived there now? Maybe the humans had chosen to let it fall to ruin after what happened to them. Maybe they would think it was cursed.

That's it. You had forgotten to calm your breathing. Again.

"Awknowledge the thoughts that came into your mind and let them go." Eris' voice vibrated right inside you making you shift slightly on your place.

"I thought you were going to teach me how to control my power, not how to control my breathing." You scoffed.

"Who said anything about training your power in the bargain?" He said almost bored.

Your eyes snapped open and you looked at him incredulous. He was smirking. That bastard was smirking and you wanted nothing more than to slap that grin away from his face.

"If you do not train me I could easily lose control and burn everything around us to ashes." You said slowly, angry that he thought he could trick you. "And you with it."

Eris opened his eyes, his grin only grew wider as he looked at you. "Oh, but that would be quite the sight." You clenched your jaw as your skin started to pinch with heat. He gave you an amused look before closing his eyes again and taking a deep breath. "Relax, Little Flame. We need to make you burst out that mass of power that you had been foolishly sealed inside you, but I won't make you do it until I know it's not completely safe for you."

"And completely safe for this place." You added while you fought the blush that was growing on your cheeks at the thought that Eris had just said that he wanted you safe.

You saw him shrugging, his eyes remained shut. "Helion wouldn't mind a little renovation." You scoffed rolling your eyes. How could he be so calm? You had expected to learn how to control your fire, and instead you were struggling to control even your breathing. "Believe it or not, but I'm trying to help you. Close your eyes."

His firm tone made you ashamedly tightening your thighs. You bit the inside of your cheek to prevent you from doing something stupid, like talk back and made him use that tone again.

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm the heat that was starting to grow at the pit of your stomach, which you were sure wasn't due your flames.

"You were born human, but no one taught you how to be a High Fae when the cauldron Made you. Your body is stronger, faster. Your sight, hearing, and nose are sharper." Eris' explanation hit something very precise inside you. It was true, no one had ever stopped to explain to you how to use those new abilities. And it was fine, you had never really asked, knowing that as the older sister you should have to figure it out on your own. "We are at the border between Summer and Spring, with only your nose you should be able to tell where the border exactly is, but lets start easy. Use all your senses but the sight."

His calm and warm voice made it sound simple, and you believed him. It wasn't a even-a-child-can-do-it type of simple, it was more like a your-body-can-naturally-do-that type of simple.

You spent another hour like that, and by the end of it you were smiling broadly. You had successfully used all your new senses, and you were mesmerized by Eris' patience. Not once he had rushed you or had seemed to be tired.

"You're smiling." your head snapped toward him and you couldn't help the look of surprise that grew on your face. "You've never smiled like that when I was around."

You watched him with a hint of michievous in your eyes. As soon as you had successfully told him where the border was he had instructed you to stand in front of the lake and try to smell the animals around you. "You've never been silent around me before."

Eris laughed. The redhead in front of you, the Heir of Autumn, the General of the Autumn Court's army actually laughed and didn't incinerated you for your words.

It was an awful lie what you had said. His voice was probably the most beautiful sound you had ever heard, and you wondered if he laughed because he knew that deep down.

Cauldron, I hope not.

"Tell me if you sense some creatures in the lake." Eris smirked crossing his arms over his chest. "I'll gift you with more silence in the meantime."

You playfully rolled your eyes and took a step closer to the lake.

Deep breath.

Empty mind.

Eyes closed.

You felt the bird above you, the deers at your left, deep in the Summer's forest and even the rabbits beyond the Spring's border. But nothing came from the lake in front of you. Confused you opened your eyes and tried to catch some glimps of fishes or other creatures.

"Nothing." You said tilting your head a bit confused. "I don't think there is something in this lake."

"Good." Eris grinned michievously. "Then put your hands in the water and let your fire out."

You felt your eyebrows hitting your hairline as you widened your eyes and looked at him incredulous. "I am absolutely not."

"You absolutely are." he quickly remarked.

"What if there are fishes in there? I cannot kill them." You gestured to the pool of water in front of you, trying to understand what he intented.

"You said there is nothing in there." He shrugged becoming serious. "You need to start trusting your senses. There might still be days where you need to let your power out and you'll need to scan the area quickly to make sure no one is around."

His words carried something too personal for you to let them go. Was he speaking for personal experience? You wanted to talk back, you wanted to ask him if there were creatures in the lake, but something inside you stirred.

Eris might be the only one who could understand you, who knew what you were going through. He was the oldest son of Beron, you wondered what kind of pressures he had to live with. You wondered if he too had to learn how to use his fire beside a lake to not hurt anyone.

You slowly crounched on your feet and even slower took your gloves away. The burned flesh on your hands were red with remains of the green sticky cream that Madja had given you. The cold water send shivers of pure relief through all your body.

"You want me to light a fire under water..." You said skeptical looking at Eris over your shoulder.

"Darling, I'm positive your power could light a fire at the bottom of the ocean, if wield properly." You looked away from his lazy grin as your stomach twisted at his new nickname.

Water or not water you had to understand now how to call the fire at you. For weeks the flames had been burning all your body no-stop, you just needed to focus them in your hands.

"I do not suppose to know you, but I might guess that your power usually answer to your anger." he was standing behind you like you hadn't a burning fire inside you ready to explode, like you weren't a danger for him. "Focus that sweet mind of yours toward what anger you most."

You.

The answer was quick in your mind.

Eris Vanserra had the ability to make you angry with just a look, and there were so many reasons that you couldn't focus on just one. It made you angry when he used his mocking tone with you. It made you angry when he used a gentle tone with you. It made you angry when he looked at you like you were the only person in the room, and it made you angry when he avoided your gaze in a room full of people.

It made you angry knowing what he did to Mor. It made you angry that there were times when you didn't care. It made you angry that you thought that the male in front of you could never do shuch thing. It had made you angry that he had saved you. But you were even angrier when he hadn't seek you out after the battle.

Eris Vanserra made you angry because he didn't make you angry at all. He made you feel frustrated, amused, annoyed, flustered and seen, and you were angry because you shouldn't feel those things. Not with him.

You felt it then. You felt hot flames rising from your skin and you imagined that the water in front of you were your feelings, and they needed to burn. So, they burnt.

Bright, red fire appeared underwater around your hands and the water in front of you started to boil. You let it all out. Every flame you had pushed down in those months was now left free.

It felt so good to finally let it go. The flames were circling all your arms, from your shoulders down your elbows and to your hands. You had missed the warmt that came from inside your body, the ethernal sensation that no cold could ever touch your skin, never again.

***

Eris had never known an enchanting sight as the one he had in front of him now. Your flames were all around you while from the lake it was rising a cloud of steam that soon enough would catch someone's attention.

He felt your rage through the bond and everything you had kept inside. The steam of power that you were letting out was huge, destructive, beautiful.

He watched silently as your fire stopped and you let yourself fall back, sitting on the burned grass and staring the water with emotionless eyes. He dared to tuck softly the bond, trying to understand what you were feeling, then you laughed, and something gold flickered inside him at that sound.

It was a laugh that could make him burn courts to the ground for the chance to hear it again. It was the laugh that at some point he had dreamed while Under the Montain. It was the laugh of hope that no matter if people like Amarantha, Beron or the King of Hybern ruled merciless, there were still people with enough strenght to laugh.

"I've never felt so free in a long time." you almost whispered to yourself. You stared at your hands and Eris let out a sigh of relief as he saw that the skin was completely healed.

He saw as you took a deep breath and closed your eyes tilting your head back toward the sky, and Eris felt the need to make you stop looking so fucking perfect while he had no right to enjoy this view.

He cleared his throat bringing his hands behind his back. "Can I dare to ask what or who you were thinking? I wouldn't want to find myself in the middle of the two of you."

You gave him a indecipherable look. "Cassian's habit to steal my breakfast."

Eris didn't hold the scoff that escaped his lips. It was clearly a lie, but he understood that. He was no one for you, there was no reason for you to trust him with your thoughts, so he didn't push, even if his stomach twisted in a payinful knot.

He smelled a light scent far behind him, and he knew that was time for you to return back at home. "We should go back before the shadowsinger cut my throat."

He turned around, needing to stop that moment before he started to believe things that couldn't be true. Not yet.

"Wait." your voice stopped him and he curiously turned around to look at you as you stood up and brushed of the grass from your dress. You walked closer to him with a steady look that made him equally unsteady. "It's time for my part of the bargain. My question."

He rose slightly his eyebrows, surprised by your sudden determination. "Go ahead."

He saw as you tried to organize your thoughts, crossing your arms as to make you more secure of yourself. "Is this side of yours part of the mask?"

Eris tilted his head, a bit confused by your question. "This side?" What were you seeing in him? What did he let slip?

"Yes, this side." You gestured with your hands at his whole person. "You, helping me and not being a total arrogant. You always make sure to make the others doubt your intentions, to doubt you. While...while the one I have in front of me is not the same male I heard the others talk about."

Eris stood there for a moment, looking into your eyes. He heard steps behind him approach, steps of someone who usually doesn't want to be heard. He slowly reached out a hand, and tuck some hair behind your ear and he smirked as he heard your breath caucht in your throat.

"Maybe I'm just manipulating you." He whispered, knowing he had few more seconds to play with you. If he couldn't have you for himself, he at least could have those reactions from you. "Maybe I want you to think I'm the good guy to use you against your precious Inner Circle. It would be quite the revenge."

"You are not moved out of revenge." Your response left him speechless for a moment. "If you wanted revenge then half of Prythian would be death."

"I could convince you to kill them for me." he stated back. He had let his hand lingering behind your ear, and now he let it slowly trace down the curve of your neck.

You breath had become clearly shorter, he could feel your heart beating through your chest, but your face betrayed nothing. He could see something flicker in your eyes, the only thing you couldn't control, but the look you were giving him was caution.

It was a game now, seeing how far he needed to go to convince you he was indeed the bad guy. Not to you. Never to you. But to everyone else. He wasn't above killing to gain what he wanted. He had lied, killed, manipulated and swore false oath to ensure the security of his people, but for you? He would kill with his bare hands an entire court to give you a throne, and it terried him.

"I told you, I won't kill for you." your voice snapped him back from his mind. You grabbed his wrist with your hand, fingers still hot with fire, and shoved it away from your neck. "You didn’t-“

“It’s time to go.” A voice cold as death stopped you in mid sentence.

Eris didn’t acknowledge the shadowsinger behind him, keeping his eyes on you. “But we were having so much fun.”

“Step away from her.” Your eyes snapped on Azriel and something twisted inside Eris as he watched you smiling at the shadowsinger and walking toward him.

Will he ever be the one receiving that smile? Will you ever walk toward him that happily?

He watched as you took Azriel’s arm and the shadows started to grow around you, ready to winnow away.

“Little flame.” Eris called after you. Your eyes found his over the wall of shadows that was forming around you. It was time for the answer, he guessed. “No, it’s not.”

Your eyes widened, and it was a pity, seriously, that he couldn’t see the rest of your face before you disappeared, because he knew it would be hilarious.

taglist: @adventure-awaits13 @blueeclipsepaperstudent @huffleruffplant @azysmate @bia-wayne-west @babypeapoddd @lady-targaryens-world@sourapplex @ghostwritermia @asteria33 @pinklemonade34 @tell-me-a-poem @speedypersonawhispers @historygeekqueen @webvics @paliketerson @lizzytish82 @tincanhat @marrass @acourtofmoonlightandstars @yasmin-oviedo @ghostwritermia @marly500

#eris vanserra x reader #eris vanserra #eris vanserra fic #burning flames #autumn court #acotar #acotar fic #velaris #rhysand #Morrigan #azriel #cassian #feyre archeron #elain archeron #nesta archeron #night court #acowar #acomaf

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floraleevee · 12 hours ago

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Caveats/notes:

Many growers have reported success with “ZeroWater” filters. Not recommended if you have a lot of plants, as you’ll burn through filters quickly (but if you do, you probably already know all this). Additionally, ZeroWater filters have a tendency to FLOOD your water with nutrients when the filter is old (like, higher TDS than normal tap water). So highly recommended to have a TDS meter to make sure it’s still good. Tbh I’d just get distilled at the store, but some growers prefer this option 🤷

There are cheap RO systems that hook up to sinks. I’ve used an RO Buddy for over 5 years without having to replace any of the filters. Since I used to have hundreds of carnivorous plants for the majority of that time, that’s pretty dang good. I think I was going through ~10 gallons a week during my peak years, though am down to 4 gallons a week now. iirc it cost about $60. I don’t use the optional 4th filter, as it’s unnecessary and is so fine that the flow rate is reportedly abysmal. I will say the RO Buddy is fairly slow when using a sink - I get about 1 gallon every 15 minutes. The RO buddy generally can hook up to kitchen sinks in the US just fine, but idk about outside the US. Additionally, I’ve found it doesn’t work on bathroom sinks. You can get a cheap adapter at a hardware store for like $5, though, and then can use your bathroom.

Deionized water is good too. Most people probably don’t have access to it, which is why I’m guessing bogleech didn’t mention it. But if you work in a lab you may have access to deionized water.

Some people collect the condensation from their a/c units. Don’t ask me how, I don’t know.

Be careful with rainwater. Some roofs are treated with chemicals that over time begin to leach out. Nothing too terribly harmful for the native plants around your house, but can reportedly kill carnivorous plants.

I just want to reiterate bogleech: Not all wetlands are equal! Even if you do have a bog nearby, I highly recommend not using that water. For one, bogs are extremely sensitive and it’s generally recommended you don’t step in one if you can avoid it. I’ve done conservation research in bogs and had to submit my plans to the land manager, who came back to me and said “you’re permitted to access this small portion of the bog. That’s all I’m willing to sacrifice for research”. Because, yeah, they are THAT sensitive. Also, there are gonna be potential pathogens in the water that you don’t want on your plants.

You actually can get away with tap temporarily. If the options are “let my plants dry up and die of thirst” or “water with tap water”, give them tap. As soon as possible, flush their pots/soil with DI/RO water. If your plants are in trays/nested pots, don’t let the water collect in them when flushing. Growth will likely be stunted for several weeks/months as the plants work to regrow their damaged roots, but stunted growth is better than dead. This is highly variable between taxa, with at least one study showing Sarracenia having some of the most resilient roots (though anecdotally I’ve heard Nepenthes hold up fairly well as well).

Related to the last point: some people live in areas with really low TDS tap water. Generally, this seems to be from people that use well water rather than city water. Again, TDS meters (total dissolved solids meters) are a handy tool. The lower the TDS the better, with consensus being that ~50 ppm* is the upper limit (again, anecdotes from growers report Nepenthes can actually handle a bit higher, but those are circumstantial and I wouldn’t risk it) * it might actually be parts per thousand. My TDS meter is already set to the units I need, so I don’t remember which. Sorry 😅

I highly, HIGHLY recommend anyone looking to grow carnivorous plants read The Savage Garden by Peter D’Amato. There’s a good chance you’re going to mess something else up with your plant(s). Carnivorous plants are extremely sensitive to other factors, such as soil type and (in the event of pathogens) fungicides/pesticides/miticides. Most want more sun than you think they do. Peter’s book is incredibly well detailed and organized, so you can easily find whatever info you need. I’ve also found most libraries carry it both physically and digitally, and both types of copies are generally not checked out.

Every day in carnivorous plant groups someone asks why their carnivorous plant died and reveals that they used pond water, or filtered tap water, or mountain spring water.

Carnivorous plants cannot adapt to anything but water with the properties of fresh condensation. This is ABSOLUTELY INFLEXIBLE, there is no wiggle room, you cannot get away with giving them the wrong water, not temporarily, not even once!

The only sources for this water are:

Bottled water with "distilled" on the front label, and no other different wording, no "purified" or "spring!"

Water from a reverse osmosis filter. Not a brita filter or any other filter! A reverse osmosis filter is a large expensive system, so no filter you just plug onto your tap will count.

Fresh rainwater that has not touched soil, ie collected in a plastic tub.

Water from a natural bog, which is a very specific type of wetland and very rare in most of the world!

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drdemonprince · 2 days ago

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I’m liking the normalized conversations around childhood sexual assault and sexuality. There’s something even more “taboo” that no one talks about. I dont know if you actually want to respond to this but I’ll type it out if even just for cathartic purposes.

People very rarely discuss sexual assault where the victim actually gets pleasure out the experience. I was molested by a neighbourhood kid not much older than me who I believe was sexualized by his dad and encouraged to do things to the girls in our neighbourhood. I heard rumours about other girls.

Anyway I dont know if these events caused hyper sexuality or if it was already there and that’s why I responded the way I did. But basically he would do things and I would just kinda giggle and enjoy it. I was super young like maybe 4 and he was around 6. In my mind he was showing me attention like grown ups do who are in a relationship so I thought he was kinda like my boyfriend which I liked and I felt kinda special. But he was not into me like that at all and grew up to be a good looking popular prep school boy with like a million girls after him.

I look back and go yeah actually that was kinda gross and weird but my responses always made me feel more shame than what he did. Like there was something wrong with me for reacting that way.

I don’t know if you know Billy Connelly the Scottish comedian. He was molested by his dad and spoke about how it caused pain but there was pleasure in it too. It is like that because if you touch a human body in a certain place and way we will have natural responses albeit unwillingly.

I recently read something on here where this chick who was raped said she orgasmed through it. She still felt violated, traumatized, all those things. But her body responded that way and that caused her a lot of shame.

I wonder if this is more common than we think but no one talks about it? Which makes it a really hard place to come from and harder to try and talk openly about it and get support. Because people just probably think it’s gross and unnatural. Or that is means you “wanted it” therefore it’s not assault and your experience becomes invalidated.

I wish Tumblr's search function was better because I have talked about this many times before! I came during the majority of my assaults, it makes sense that this would be a self protective mechanism that the body employs to prevent physiological damage during rape. One of my assaults is so vividly linked to unstoppable/unintended pleasure in my mind that it's still one of my number one spank-bank topics; I masturbate about my assault on a regular basis and have frequently used sexual scenarios with consenting partners to recreate it for myself. What you are describing is super common anon. Try looking back in the archive for the taboo kinks asks to hopefully see more about this.

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wosos-stuff · 1 day ago

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The journal of secrets

Chapter 3: A Public Appearance Together

The sun hung low in the sky as Y/N walked through the entrance of the event, her heart beating a little faster than usual. It was a casual meet-and-greet with fans, something the Arsenal team did a few times a year to stay connected with the community. Normally, Y/N enjoyed these events—they were light, fun, and gave her a chance to talk to the people who supported them every matchday.

But today felt different. Today, she wasn’t just Y/N, another player on the team. Today, she was *Alessia Russo’s girlfriend*.

Her eyes darted to the side, where Alessia walked beside her, casually adjusting her jacket as if this was just another day. Her calm demeanor made Y/N feel even more out of place, her nerves heightened by the knowledge that they were about to spend the evening acting like a couple in front of everyone.

“Relax,” Alessia said, her voice low and soothing. She must have noticed Y/N’s nervous energy because she gave her a small nudge with her elbow. “It’s just like we practiced.”

Y/N forced a smile, nodding. “Yeah, I know. I’m fine.”

But she wasn’t fine. Her heart raced with every step they took closer to the crowd of people waiting for them, phones out, eager to snap pictures and ask questions. This was part of the deal. They had to make it look real, and that meant staying close, holding hands, and—most importantly—acting like they were more than just teammates.

As they reached the first group of fans, Alessia slid her hand into Y/N’s, the gesture so smooth and natural that it made Y/N’s breath catch in her throat. She hoped the flutter in her chest didn’t show on her face. They exchanged smiles with the fans, signing jerseys and posing for photos, all while Alessia kept her hand firmly in Y/N’s.

Every now and then, Y/N would glance at Alessia out of the corner of her eye, trying to read her expression. Alessia was all smiles and charm, laughing easily with the fans, her presence warm and inviting. She was so good at this—so good at making it look effortless. But Y/N couldn’t shake the feeling that it was all too real, that the way Alessia held her hand wasn’t just part of an act.

It didn’t help that every time someone mentioned their “relationship,” Y/N’s heart did a little flip. The fans loved it—they cooed over how “cute” they were together, some even asking how long they’d been dating. Alessia would always answer with a playful smile, keeping it vague but believable.

“We’ve been keeping it low-key for a while,” Alessia said with a wink when one fan asked about how they got together. Y/N tried not to blush, forcing herself to smile along with the charade.

As the evening went on, the event started to wind down, but Y/N’s nerves never quite settled. She kept waiting for Alessia to let go of her hand, to step back, to put some distance between them. But she didn’t. Not once. And every time Y/N felt the warmth of Alessia’s fingers wrapped around hers, it was harder to remind herself that this was all just pretend.

---

After the meet-and-greet, the team gathered in the back of the venue, relaxing and catching up before heading home for the night. The mood was light—everyone laughing, joking, and teasing each other about the evening. Y/N stood off to the side, watching as Alessia chatted with a few of the girls, including Katie McCabe and Beth Mead.

She was still riding the wave of nerves from earlier, her mind replaying every touch, every glance, every smile Alessia had given her in front of the fans. It had all felt so real, and yet it wasn’t. She knew it wasn’t. But the more time she spent around Alessia, the harder it was to keep her emotions in check.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard Katie’s voice, loud and teasing, as usual.

“So, Alessia,” Katie said with a playful grin, “now that you’re all ‘boo’d up,’ does this mean you’re off the market for good? I mean, I could always use a gorgeous date for a night out.”

The comment was harmless, just Katie being Katie, but Y/N felt a strange twist in her stomach. It wasn’t like Katie was serious, but something about the way she said it—the way Alessia laughed in response—made Y/N’s chest tighten.

Alessia waved her off, still grinning. “Sorry, McCabe. I’m a one-woman show now. You’ll have to find someone else.”

Katie laughed, pretending to look disappointed. “Ah, well. Guess my chances are shot, huh?”

Y/N should have laughed along with the rest of them, should have shrugged it off like she always did. But instead, she found herself glancing at the floor, trying to shake off the uncomfortable feeling curling in her chest. It wasn’t real. Alessia wasn’t hers. But for some reason, hearing Katie joke about it like that made Y/N’s heart sink.

Before she could dwell on it for too long, Alessia appeared at her side, her usual playful smile in place. “Hey, you ready to head out?”

Y/N blinked, nodding quickly. “Yeah, let’s go.”

As they walked out together, Y/N couldn’t help but wonder if Alessia had noticed the flicker of jealousy that had passed through her. She hoped not. This was already complicated enough.

---

By the time they made it back to Alessia’s flat, Y/N’s nerves had settled slightly, though the nagging feeling from earlier still lingered in the back of her mind. Alessia was all casual ease, tossing her jacket onto the couch and grabbing a couple of beers from the fridge.

“You want one?” Alessia asked, holding up a bottle.

Y/N hesitated for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

She took the beer and sat down on the couch, feeling a little out of place. This was the first time she had been to Alessia’s place since they started this whole fake relationship thing. It felt weird, sitting here like this—so normal, yet so loaded with unspoken emotions.

Alessia plopped down beside her, kicking her feet up on the coffee table as she took a sip from her bottle. “So,” she said, glancing over at Y/N, “I’d say we did pretty well today.”

Y/N smiled, nodding. “Yeah, I think we sold it.”

“Definitely,” Alessia agreed, her eyes twinkling with that familiar mischief. “People were eating it up.”

Y/N laughed softly, taking a sip of her beer. “Yeah… they were.”

But as the conversation lulled, a comfortable silence settled between them, and Y/N found herself glancing around Alessia’s flat, taking in the small details. There were framed photos on the wall—pictures of Alessia with her family, her friends, and even a few of

her younger self in football kits from her early days in the sport. It was a glimpse into Alessia’s life, a side of her that Y/N hadn’t really seen before.

After a few minutes, Alessia sighed, leaning back against the couch. “You know, it’s weird.”

Y/N looked over at her, curious. “What is?”

“This whole thing,” Alessia said, waving her hand around vaguely. “The fame, the attention, the pressure. Sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe, you know? Like… everyone expects me to be this perfect version of myself all the time.”

Y/N’s heart clenched at the vulnerability in Alessia’s voice. It was rare for her to hear Alessia talk like this—open, raw, and honest. Usually, Alessia was all confidence and charm, always putting on a brave face. But here, in the quiet of her flat, she seemed… different. More real.

“I get that,” Y/N said softly, turning to face her. “It’s a lot to carry.”

Alessia nodded, staring down at the beer bottle in her hands. “Yeah, and sometimes… sometimes I just wish I could turn it all off, you know? Just be Alessia. Not ‘Alessia Russo, the footballer,’ or ‘Alessia Russo, the media darling.’ Just… me.”

Y/N didn’t know what to say. She had always seen Alessia as this untouchable figure, someone who had it all together. But now, hearing her talk like this, Y/N realized that Alessia had her own struggles, her own fears. It made her feel even closer to her—made her want to be there for her, to be the person Alessia could rely on.

But that wasn’t what this was. This wasn’t real.

“You can be that person,” Y/N said quietly. “With me. You don’t have to pretend.”

Alessia looked at her, surprised, but there was something warm in her eyes. Something that made Y/N’s heart skip a beat.

“Thanks,” Alessia said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. “I… I appreciate that.”

For a moment, they just sat there, the silence between them filled with unspoken words. And in that moment, Y/N forgot about everything—forgot that this was all supposed to be pretend, forgot that Alessia wasn’t really hers. All she knew was that right now, sitting here with Alessia, everything felt real.

---

Later that night, as Y/N lay in her own bed, staring up at the ceiling, her mind was a whirlwind of emotions. The more time she spent with Alessia, the harder it was to keep her feelings in check. She had promised herself that she wouldn’t let this fake relationship get to her—that she wouldn’t fall for Alessia. But it was too late for that.

She was already falling. Hard.

The problem was, she didn’t know if Alessia felt the same. She couldn’t tell if the moments they shared were real, or if they were just part of the act. Alessia was so good at pretending—so good at making it look real. But was it real? Or was Y/N just fooling herself?

She needed to talk to someone. Someone who wasn’t Alessia.

The next day, Y/N found herself sitting with Leah Williamson after training, her heart heavy with the weight of her unspoken emotions. Leah had always been a good friend, someone Y/N could trust. But even so, she wasn’t sure how much she could say without revealing too much.

“You seem a bit off,” Leah said, glancing over at her with concern. “Everything okay?”

Y/N hesitated, then nodded slowly. “Yeah, just… dealing with some stuff.”

Leah raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “What kind of stuff?”

Y/N sighed, running a hand through her hair. “It’s… complicated.”

Leah didn’t press her for more, but she gave her a knowing look. “Listen, if you need to talk, I’m here. Just… be honest with yourself, okay? Don’t get stuck in something that’s going to mess you up.”

Y/N nodded, appreciating the advice, even if she couldn’t explain the whole situation. She had to be honest with herself—but that was the hardest part. How could she be honest when she didn’t even know what was real anymore?

---

The tension between Y/N and Alessia grew in the days that followed. It wasn’t obvious—nothing anyone else would notice—but Y/N could feel it. She was pulling back, trying to protect herself from the growing feelings that threatened to overwhelm her. And Alessia… Alessia seemed to notice.

One evening, after a particularly quiet training session, Alessia caught up with Y/N as they walked off the pitch.

“Hey,” she said, her voice softer than usual. “You’ve been kind of distant lately. Everything okay?”

Y/N’s heart raced at the question. She hadn’t expected Alessia to bring it up, and now that she had, Y/N didn’t know what to say.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Y/N replied, her voice a little too quick, a little too defensive.

Alessia frowned, clearly not buying it. “You sure? You don’t seem like yourself.”

Y/N swallowed hard, trying to keep her emotions in check. She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t tell Alessia the truth—not when she didn’t even know what the truth was.

“I’m fine,” she repeated, avoiding Alessia’s gaze. “Really.”

Alessia stared at her for a long moment, as if she wanted to say something more, but in the end, she just nodded. “Okay. But if something’s going on… you can talk to me, you know?”

Y/N nodded, her throat tight with unspoken words. She wanted to talk to Alessia, wanted to tell her everything—how confused she was, how scared she was of falling for her. But she couldn’t. Not yet.

“Thanks,” Y/N said quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.

And with that, they parted ways, the tension between them still unresolved.

#woso x reader #alessia russo #alessia russo x reader #woso fanfics

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fallingrealms16 · 9 hours ago

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Okay so I need to rant about a fic. I don’t normally do this. I’m reading “your dearest fantasy (i could be a good mother)” by shadowsandsouls on ao3 @sapphicwiles and they just made and update of it yesterday. HERES THE THING. It’s started off a cute lil heart wrenching one shot with only 1 chapter. Then they added another and changed the chapter amount to 4. THEN THEY UPDATED IT YESTERDAY and then said THIS in the end notes:

Are you fucking KIDDING ME I’m actually gonna crash out. This is the best thing to happen in MONTHS of reading.

I cannot express ENOUGH how much I have needed a fic like this. The way you write the magic, the fluff, even the intimate, I don’t even want to say sex or smut because it’s not— you write them purely making LOVE, has left me feeling like I need to cry about how beautiful this writing is.

For me, I am able to visualise/imagine things in full colour and mostly with movement. So as if Im watching a movie. So put that together with such brilliant writing it really makes this a fic I’m going to remember and recommend to ANYONE willing to listen.

It has a special place in my heart now. As I was reading it I kept getting sad knowing the chapter was about to finish as I got closer to the end but I had to remind myself that whatever happens in the next chapter is going to be SO FUCKING WORTH THE WAIT.

And I want to ask (which of course you don’t have to as it is YOUR story) if you can write them finding out when it happens (I don’t wanna spoil) I see so many people who write fics like these skip over that and fast forward a few weeks - months. BUT whatever you write I will take because again, I AM CHERISHING THIS FIC WITH MY WHOLE SOUL, BODY, MIND.

Thank you for giving us this masterpiece and I’m so excited to see where it goes

(Ps I am likely going to be posting about this so if I get annoying tell me pls and I’ll calm down)

#special fic recommendation #caitvi #caitvi headcanon #caitlyn kiramman #caitlyn arcane #vi x caitlyn #league of legends caitlyn #vi arcane #vi league of legends #vi lol #violet arcane #violet lol #violyn #arcane caitvi #i want to cry #this is so good #beyond words #ily ily ily

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lighttailoring · 5 hours ago

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SYRIL DAY! SYRIL DAY <3 MY TERRIBLE HORRIBLE BOY

I really wasn’t sure what to post but eventually I have settled on a list of things that I think are cool. I don’t think anyone reading this won’t have been subjected to at least a little bit of this already so for this I’m sorry. But this is my moment to shine!

NO JOKE CHARACTERS

This is the #1 thing I notice and appreciate about Syril’s arc, honestly. I’ve seen far, far too many shows set up characters like this in other media. Mean, Pathetic Losers whose only role in the plot is to be repeatedly humiliated over the course of it – and of course, it’s always all their fault. Why don’t they realise that nobody likes them, that everything they do is terrible, that they should just go away and leave the normal people alone? When he first showed up on screen I was genuinely watching through my fingers. Just kill him off already, I thought. Please. Just kill him off, so I don’t have to watch him be used as a punching bag while you point and go “Ha, funny right? It’s funny to watch freaks like this guy suffer, isn’t it? Aren’t you glad you’re not like him – wait, you’re not like him, are you?”

But then they… didn’t do either of those things? Syril doesn’t win, sure. He can’t win, at least on the path he’s currently going down, because this is Andor. I will leave the entire post that I could write about how Andor’s narrative *will * fuck you for Timm &/ Nurchi Appreciation Day – that’s coming, right? But tl;dr: God is real on this show and his name is Tony Gilroy and he hates fascism lol.

But he also isn’t treated like a joke. There are no joke characters on this show. His stroppy little attempts to be taken seriously are laughable but they’re also given depth, just like everybody else’s shitty decisions. Real motivations, real consequences.

And then after they didn’t kill him off in Reckoning, Andor heard everyone making their cute little Mommy Issues jokes and went “OK!” and sent him home to his actual mother and we all had to sit there and watch -

THE OPPRESSIVE REGIME AS THE ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP WRIT LARGE

“It’s easier to hide behind forty atrocities than a single incident,” says Nemik, and in the same episode we see Eedy Karn – a woman whose first interaction with her only son, who she’s not seen in years, is to slap him across the face – repeatedly needle Syril. The kitchenette is small, cramped, lit only by grubby artificial lighting. It feels like an interrogation room. It basically is an interrogation room. Eedy berates Syril for every single thing he does or says – a brown suit triggers a particularly insidious wave of insults disguised as concern, but we know as well as he does that he could have worn any colour and gotten the same reaction. In the same show we also watch Mon Mothma struggle against a constant onslaught of bullshit from her dreadful husband, and we see the same tactics being used, albeit in slightly different ways. It just never lets up, for either of them – if they try to ready themselves to fight back against even one barb, they’ll find themselves with ten more lodged in their backs that they haven’t been able to dodge, so they just… endure it.

Fuck it - this isn’t an academic essay. What I’m trying to say is fuck I love Andor for holding up a picture of an abusive relationship and a picture of an oppressive regime and waiting for us to figure out that they’re the same picture. Undermine your target at every turn – convince them that they can’t win. Then when you actively harm them, they won’t even bother to fight back.

A SHADOW, A TENANT, A STRANGER

So yeah there’s that. But Syril’s arc in specific really focuses on what it’s like to live in a panopticon – to know you’re constantly being monitored. “I have ways of knowing,” Syril says to Eedy. But he doesn’t seem to have ways of preventing her from snooping on him. And really, what good does knowing that you’re being watched do, if you can’t stop it?

How do you grow, when you’re constantly being monitored, and when – as it’s been demonstrated – there is no possible way to please the person who’s monitoring you? How do you develop a personality? How do you do anything?

We see so many times just how stunted Syril is – from his absolute inability to think in shades of grey, his need for order because he doesn’t have any idea what he wants (“I want what you want,” he says – does he mean I think I know what you want, or does he mean Whatever you want is what I want?), the way he looks like a little child in his sad pyjamas sitting at that plastic table, his bizarre little friendship with Mosk that’s more like two kids on the playground than two fully grown men. He doesn’t have his own desires because he hasn’t been allowed to have them. He wants the rigidity and facelessness of the Empire because then he doesn’t have to deal with the fact that he doesn’t have a face of his own. He’s so nothingy. I love him so much you guys.

TAILORING

BUT the one thing we do see Syril actively doing is… tailoring. Well, we don’t see him do it, but Kyle Soller has confirmed in interviews that Syril is doing it himself, which I think most of us suspected. In a show that keeps bringing up salvage and ‘fix it yourself’ and how we’re pushed towards the pre-packaged and mass-produced precisely because it keeps us reliant on the supplier, it’s… it itches, to see this guy taking in his shapeless Pre-Mor uniform to flatter him (hi Kyle Soller slutty waist fans), to see him raising the collar of the brown suit that his mother hates so much (and someone pointed out that the collar is a slightly darker brown than the rest of the suit, and that he’s then clearly used that same material to add to the cuffs, so that it looks intentional). Where’s that post about how the reason influencers and celebrities look so great in clothing that you look dreadful in is because they’ve had all of their clothing tailored to fit, where you’re expected to just make do in stuff that’s designed to fit someone who doesn’t even exist.

The fact that you’d THINK he’d be so wedded to the idea of Following The Rules that he’d insist on not making any alterations to his uniforms at all???? (First person to say “It’s Because He’s Vain And Selfish” is getting a little kissy on the forehead because I know that will annoy you more than anything <3)

THE SUN…

You’re still reading this, so you’re getting my favourite, most brain-itching thing YAY

The opening scene of The Axe Forgets is the moment that cemented Syril in my head as My Blorbo Forever. Two seconds. I timed it! Two seconds of sunlight. And he’s been waiting for it, sat on his bed like a dog waiting for its master to come home – and there it is, the sun on his face – and then it’s gone. He’s left all alone in the darkness again.

(and THAT’S on a sunny day... and what happens when another block is built, or someone puts up a billboard, or runs an expressway through that little sliver of sky? Fuck you, is what).

It’s implied that Syril and his mother are pretty solidly lower-middle-class. They’ve Worked Hard All Their Lives, and have probably been ‘calling in favours’ their whole lives, also. I’m half convinced that Syril was sending money home from Pre-Mor to help pay the rent (otherwise why the immediate need for Syril to get another job? Wouldn’t Eedy love to relish in her son’s unemployment, and have him at home 24/7 to boot?) And this is what all that hard work gets them – two seconds of sunlight a day.

It’s like… OK the reason they made a TV show instead of writing an essay is because I can write all of this out, but when you see that shot, you feel it. The fucking SUN. Even the sunlight is out of reach. Coruscant is Hell I stg

BUT WAIT I HAVE MORE THINGS TO SAY. Luthen says “I burn my life to make a sunrise I know I’ll never see” and there is of course a supremely ironic comparison to be made there with Syril’s own hubris handing Ferrix to the Empire and leading him back to that childhood room where he literally will never see the sunrise – but. The sunrise.

The problem with sunrises is that you sort of can’t stop them from happening. I think it falls into the wider (and perhaps faulty!) concept in Andor that the success of the rebellion is inevitable – that “one single thing will break the siege”.

Why did they give Syril these scenes with the sun? Nothing in this show is accidental. I’ve been turning it over and over in my brain ever since the show aired. Why is this character, who’s so browbeaten and curled in on himself and willing to debase himself in service of an Empire that hates him because he doesn’t know anything other than being hated – why does he get the sun, the sun that will always rise no matter what

Drives me crazy. Anyway

Character Appreciation Friday - Syril Karn

Name: Syril Karn Played by: Kyle Soller Appearances: Kassa, That Would Be Me, Reckoning, Aldhani, The Axe Forgets, Announcement, Narkina 5, Nobody's Listening!, Daughter of Ferrix, Rix Road

Happy Friday, fam! We're really getting to the meat of it for Appreciation Friday from here on out, starting with our number one sad cereal boy, Syril Karn.

Love him or hate him, there's so much to appreciate about this little weasel of a character. So let me know what you think in a reblog, comment, or ask! (and remember, do not be an asshole if you don't like him. learn to say it in a respectful way or don't say it at all)

Next week: Kleya Marki

#sorry this post is a bit of a mess because I am really no good at essays or even lists #as I am sure is evident by this very post #but I had to say something for my terrible boy.#imagine this post as me holding very tightly to a doll in a charity shop that is obviously cursed #I am pointing out SO many cool things about it #also I forgot to mention loads of things sorry about that.#syril karn

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terrainofheartfelt · 2 years ago

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Okay so the thing about Sally Rooney is she is so good at third person limited unreliable narrator and sitting in the complexity of people and letting them be ambiguous and messy and imperfect and then she’ll hit you with a line of prose that butterflies you open like a shrimp

#I’m reading normal people and it is. SO good #i feel like….it’s not the story that people are talking about #like the Normal People that I’ve seen on the blogs is different from the Normal People that I’m reading #and I felt like Daisy Jones was the same way #and maybe….absorbing novels through web weaving posts isn’t actually the way to know them #and (I know I do this too) that the tendency to focus only on the romantic relationship in the story #diminishes what the novel is really about #which is young people learning how to exist in the world #and allow themselves to live with joy without having to atone for it first #like sally rooney isn’t a romance writer #she gives bildungsroman with a side of romance #because when one is young romance is often a component of their self actualization #but she doesn’t construct a story like emily henry does #idk i think there’s a difference between Romance with a capital R which is about people falling/being in love #and fiction that is about people and who and how they love #and they serve different purposes #and maybe that’s lost when a book is adapted into a show #or maybe it’s lost when people see the story is written by a woman #I don’t know….#I’m really enjoying the novel though #kinda wish I owned it so I could annotate it #liz reads

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myokk · 7 months ago

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fast sketch of my one-shot with Ominis💓

legilimency

Word count: 1.700

Rating: M (language)

Ominis Gaunt is a lost case - lost to the whims of one very determined Gryffindor sitting at his side.

They sit in the back of the History of Magic classroom, the only two students not lulled to somnolence by their professor. He: trying his hardest to focus on Professor Binns’ droning (easier said than done). She: trying her hardest to distract Ominis while not being entirely sure of being successful or not (easier attempted than understood).

Professor Binns is completely insufferable, of course. Ominis wonders if the ghost is as blind as he is: Binns willfully ignores the fact that all of his students use his class as an excuse to get a nap in (maybe he simply doesn’t see them sleeping - only one of many reasons why Ominis has decided he could never be a professor), rambling on and on in the most boring way possible. As if he were trying to be as dull as possible (maybe he does it to avoid interacting with the students which…can’t be to blame). In a different life, Ominis could see himself quite liking the subject, but as things stand he despises it.

Especially now.

Ominis fervently wishes that he could fall asleep.

Then, he might avoid hearing her thoughts - they’re consuming him and he can’t ignore them as much as he would like to.

Normally, he loves this class - not the subject, obviously - but the class itself, for the sheer fact that it is the only time where he gets some peace and quiet. Everyone’s minds nice and quiet and shut off for the time being while they sleep. Although he has gotten used to ignoring the thoughts of everyone around him, their various voices mixing and mingling with each other into a dull thrum in the back of his mind, it is nice to have some quiet once in a while.

But right now, with everyone asleep except for the Gryffindor at his side, her thoughts are so loud it’s like she’s screaming at him.

So here he is, wishing he could fall asleep, leave the class, maybe turn off the infernal legilimency that has haunted him his whole life.

(His parents and Marvolo insist it’s a gift handed down from Slytherin himself, just like the Parseltongue Ominis despises. It is not. It is a curse.)

He is stuck listening to her.

It doesn’t help that she seems to have caught on to him - something he had managed to avoid until now. Nobody else, not even Sebastian or Anne, has ever suspected a thing. But, in all fairness, those two are extremely loud and say every single thought that passes through their minds out loud even when they should remain quiet, and nobody else has had the opportunity to spend enough time with Ominis to begin to suspect anything.

Until her.

He had to go and let that blasted girl worm her way into his life, not leaving him alone ever, always looking for excuses to talk and ask his opinion, and being so intelligent that he wanted to invite her to study with him and talk with him and…

Since it happened a few nights ago, he hasn’t stopped cursing himself for that stupid offhand comment he made. They had been studying in silence in the library together, by the history books where nobody else ever ventures (thank you, Professor Binns), and he could have sworn that she asked him if he was finally going to walk her back to her common room (he blames a lack of sleep and wishful thinking for this mishap). His traitorous face had flushed and he had jumped at the chance to escort her - maybe she would let him carry her bag, or… - only to feel his whole body go cold and his stomach drop when her response wasn’t what he’d expected.

A pause: then: a confused voice: ‘Ominis, I didn’t say anything.’

His Gryffindor wasn’t stupid like Gryffindors were normally wont to be. He knew her, and he knew that after his monumental mistake, the gears in her brain were turning and he was terrified that somehow she had figured it out.

(His Gryffindor?)

She had been unusually quiet around him since then, although he bitterly noticed that she was still acting normally with everyone else. Still finding every opportunity to punch Sebastian in the shoulder and laugh with Anne, still whispering with Natsai about Merlin knows what, still…

But she had been avoiding Ominis. He couldn’t stand it.

Well, avoiding him right until this stupid class, when she had to go and sit right next to him (ignoring the fact that she always sits next to him in History of Magic, that everyone already has and adheres to their unofficial seats), and he can’t ignore her.

She’s pretending to take studious notes, but he knows better. The scratching of her quill blending with the droning of Professor Binns’ voice but not drowning out her thoughts. They float above the other noises, her voice sweet and piercing. Ominis wonders vaguely what she’s actually writing, because he’s positive it isn’t notes.

Professor Binns looks so sexy right now with his medieval hat, talking about…whatever it is he’s passionate about. I wonder if he would let me talk to him after class without floating through me like he normally does…

Ominis is determined not to react. She’s obviously trying to bait him. But…what if she is attracted to Professor Binns? Is he an attractive man? At the thought, the fist that’s resting on top of his desk clenches, but he works to make sure his face remains impassive. Apart from a twitch of his lips, he thinks he’s been quite successful.

She: huffing and shifting in her chair, her robes rustling as she crosses her legs. He: keeping his head facing forward, steadfastly ignoring her.

She changes tactics.

Maybe she’s just as insufferable as the other Gryffindors, after all.

I wonder what Ominis would say if he knew I woke up moaning today after a dream about him -

He shifts slightly in his seat, hoping that she’s so busy taking notes (who’s he kidding) that she won’t notice his discomfort as his trousers tighten -

…the girls in my dorm have been bothering me nonstop about who I’ve been mooning over but I don’t want them to…

His hand is in such a tight fist it’s a wonder he’s not breaking any fingers as he tries to remain as still as possible, but his traitorous arousal is making her thoughts harder and harder to ignore. Had he ever been able to ignore her?

…his tongue was deep inside me as I screamed his name…

He feels his face heat up at the thought - where had she learned such vulgar language? - and his whole body stiffens. He’s sure that she can feel the tension and warmth radiating off of him in waves but that…she…his insane little lion keeps shouting at him in the silence of the classroom. She’s now stopped all pretense of taking notes and is sitting stock still.

…his cock deep inside of me as…wait…what else did I hear Garreth say to Leander that night?…um… She shifts uncomfortably, her knee grazing Ominis’s as she moves to squeeze her legs together. It’s all he can do to not groan and remain impassive. Oh god…I…what’s that feeling? This was just supposed to get back at him for probably - maybe - reading my thoughts and I’m officially insane because how would he even be able to do that?…his ears turning red from embarrassment are so adorable and I can’t stand this anymore and…

Ominis tries his hardest not to move his head in her direction. His jaw flexes. Maybe he can drown her out if he starts reciting potions ingredients, or if he focuses on what Professor Binns is saying, but even he knows its futile. He’s hanging on to her every word - thought? - and his head slowly turns in her direction as she keeps going.

…does he know how much I think about him? Oh god, what if he dreams of me the same way I…

He slams the open book in front of him shut, the loud noise causing Sebastian to jerk awake and babble incoherently for a moment before slumping back over his desk, drooling and snoring lightly. Nobody else in the class seems to notice except her of course. Blissfully, she has stopped talking - thinking - and he can finally -

It’s no use. He needs to get out of there. She has invaded his mind and…What if she starts up again with her filthy thoughts that are bleeding into his own and -

Did he hear me? I didn’t actually think…oh god, can he hear me now? What have I done?

Ominis very slowly brings his hand over to where he knows hers is. The quill falls out of her hand and he hears a sharp intake of breath at their contact. His fingers trace her knuckles and then he slowly trails them up her arm. His fingertips are so sensitive that he could swear that he feels every thread that he passes, her skin warm and alive underneath the fabric. Then to her neck, her throat bobs and he feels her erratic heartbeat. Finally, he reaches her face. She remains very, very still as his fingers brush over her features for the first time.

He has never touched someone like this before.

Her skin is like velvet, soft everywhere he touches. Now that he knows what it feels like he’s not sure he can go back to before. His fingers trace the curve of her eyebrows - he finds that her nose is straight before it flares up a tiny bit at the tip - his fingers ghost over her impossibly soft lips. He drags his thumb across her bottom lip as her tongue darts out to wet them. It’s impossibly intimate and the world has melted away and it’s just the two of them in that moment.

He leans forward.

“Ominis, I…” she whispers, stricken.

His hand moves to tuck some of her loose hair away from her face - does she always wear it like this? - and his lips brush against her ear. He inhales deeply, her sweet smell invading his senses. She shivers under his touch and he breathes, “I heard everything.”

#bahahahahahahahah I need to practice drawing Ominis MORE👹#he is just SO DIFFICULT IDK WHAT IT IS😔🙏#anyways I LOVE writing his POV!!!! & I hope I did him justice🙏#I haven’t really read any HL fanfic ever & nothing from Ominis so idk how people normally think of him #but this is my version😇😇#hope you all have/are having a good weekend!!#spent yesterday at the beach with my niece/nephew (3&8) and we built intricate sandcastles for our hermit crab army #then played board games all afternoon #& today my friend visits from 11am to 8pm and we are going to yap all day💓💓🙏🙏#should I post more of my writing????? tbh I started writing before these fan arts😅#hogwarts legacy #hogwarts legacy fanart #hphl #hogwarts legacy mc #hogwarts legacy oc #Ominis gaunt #ominis gaunt fanfiction #ominis gaunt fanart #hogwarts legacy fanfic #this is an unnamed mc as of now but since she is also goi g to be in the longer fic I write I need to think of one #I’m open to suggestions!!!!! I was thinking Rosie🥹 but IDK #ominis gaunt x mc

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shima-draws · 11 months ago

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Ideal ending to WCI is Luffy seeing Sanji cry and then awakening his devil fruit and unlocking Gear Fifth out of sheer RAGE and saying the classic line of “Who made you cry, Sanji?! I’ll DESTROY THEM!!!” and then proceeding to go on a rampage and fucking absolutely EVERYBODY up including the Vinsmokes, Pudding, AND the Big Mom Pirates. Toss in the trope of came back wrong and Sanji can immediately tell something is not right about this Luffy, whose smile is too wide, whose eyes are too distant, who continues to beat upon his enemies long after they’re down, who seems to take a sick sort of pleasure in hurting others, who grins and giggles and tells Sanji he’ll obliterate anything that makes him cry. Eventually he starts to scare Sanji so bad that even Luffy notices his reaction, and immediately turns on himself because if HE’S the one making Sanji cry then he’ll just have to destroy himself too. And that’s when Sanji finally leaps into action and does whatever he can to reach Luffy—including kissing him. Luckily that was exactly what Luffy needed to snap out of it, and when he comes to the Whole Cake Chateau is in broken pieces, the Big Mom Pirates are battered beyond fighting and the Vinsmokes are nowhere to be seen. And softly, tiredly, he asks if they won, if he can bring Sanji home, and Sanji cries again and says yes, take me home to the Sunny, I want to go home with you.

Meanwhile the rest of the Strawhats are like

#One Piece #Luffy #Monkey D Luffy #Sanlu #Lusan #Sanji #Black Leg Sanji #Really what I’m saying is that I want Luffy to go Gear Fifth during WCI. And there’s Sanlu involved.#LMAO #Also I remember reading a Gear 5 Luffy fic where he ties people together in knots. Like that’s FUCKED up #And he would ABSOLUTELY do that in this situation. For funsies. To be silly 🤪#Sanji watches in horror as Luffy uses somebody as a jumprope. To Luffy this is a Normal thing to do #Sanji torn between ‘Holy shit I’m so in love with him rn’ and ‘What the actual FUCK is that thing wearing Luffy’s face’#We’ll get eldritch god vibes up in here.#Luffy uses Conqueror’s Haki so powerful it even brings Big Mom down to her knees #Pudding starts crying out of fear and Luffy’s like :)))) Good. Suffer #He can be scary AND silly. As a treat #They had back to the Sunny eventually and Sanji’s like. Well. That happened #*head #(He also has to mentally process the fact that the regular Luffy—HIS Luffy—only came back to him after he kissed him)#(But again he doesn’t have time to unpack all that right now)#Shima speaks #Sorry it’s self indulgent hours over here. I’m getting sick again and I need some way to cope. Lol #(And I mean actually sick I’ve had the worst sore throat known to man since yesterday)

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write-it-like-disaster · 2 days ago

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I wouldn’t say that I’m old exactly, but I will say that I’m probably quite a bit older than the average tumblr user, so my fan fiction experience is a bit different.

I come from a time (“it’s been 84 years…��) when there was very little LGBTQIA+ representation in media, and the characters that were around tended to be minor, with limited background and development (I sure did love Maggie Doyle, though. Can I get an ‘amen’?). The gayest thing on TV up through my high school years was probably Will & Grace and Tara and Willow from Buffy.

Like, seriously, that was it. The L Word didn’t even come out til my second year of college. And it wasn’t until after the Clexa debacle that media eased up on the ‘bury your gays’ trope and we finally started to get lasting, fully developed queer characters.

So, what I’m saying is, is that for a very very long time queer folk especially had to create their own content, based off of subtext and lots of imagination. And even then, there wasn’t an amazing database to go to, to pull up whatever pairing for whatever show you wanted. It took some digging. I remember logging on to the AOL (dial up mind you) and somehow stumbling across a Spice Girls vampire AU fic on someone’s personal website when I was in middle school and just being COMPLETELY OBSESSED with it, scouring the internet for Buffy/Faith and Maggie Doyle fanfic, consuming everything I could find. And this made me feel normal and not so alone, because I knew there were other people out there reading this stuff too.

I wrote fanfic when I was in high school, but never even considered sharing it, too afraid I’d be found out somehow by people in real life but also because I didn’t think my writing was good enough for others to read. I couldn’t even fathom that anyone would want to read my gay little stories (though I have to say, several of them were probably better than some of the stuff I’ve written as an adult). And then I just stopped. Life got busy and fanfic just wasn’t an outlet that I had time for.

I didn’t start to consistently read or write fanfic again til a couple of years ago (so that’s a 20+ year gap, yikes) but it’s been awesome to have that sense of community and belonging again. And this time around I felt comfortable enough to actually share my work with others, it’s been so nice, especially hearing that something I wrote resonated with a reader or gave them goosebumps or just impacted them in some way. I never thought my writing would be able to do that!

So, knowing how much it can mean to an author and how much work goes into writing a fic, I always try to leave positive comments on works I read and like. I guess because I don’t take it for granted, having all these amazing stories at my fingertips, and I’m incredibly grateful.

What does fanfiction mean to you?

I'm asking this question because today I came across some ugly, mean-spirited, catty behavior towards a fic author that I haven't seen in a very, very long time, and I think it's important we discuss it as a community.

Y'all know how long I've been doing this? Fanfiction, that is.

Eighteen years.

I've posted across different platforms, on different handles, in different ways for a long, long time. More than half of my life at this point, from fourteen years old.

Fanfiction is how I personally engage with fandom the most. It's THE most important thing to me, frankly, because it is the common thread between each and every single fandom I have ever participated in.

It's self-expression to me. Folk art. Collaborative and fun. I truly hope that most people who engage in fanfiction learn what it is to beta for someone even if you don't write yourself. It can be a fantastic experience in and of itself. Being the backboard to someone else's ideas, watching as they take genuine joy out of spinning a story together to put onto the page, seeing it come to life before anyone else and feeling almost as proud as the author themselves after they finally post it.

It's ultimately why I decided to make this post far more positive and productive than the angry, grumpy, blood boiling rant that I initially was churning over in my mind after the horrible posts I saw earlier.

I'll detail them here purely for context because I think it's important to recognize toxic fandom behavior when we see it. And speak out when we stumble across it.

The first post lauded itself as an 'honest review' of a popular fanfiction in a community I am a part of. That honest review was nothing more than a pop-critique filled with a sort of catty, snarky write up that is so popular nowadays online purely to gain clout more than to act as actual, constructive criticism. It was unnecessary and acted as though the fanfiction author was a professional, New York Times Bestseller rather than someone devoting hours of their free time and effort into a hobby that is ultimately meant to be fun and pleasant.

The second post by the same person claimed that their friend had challenged them to write their own version of the premise of this fanfiction under a read more cut. It spent some time applying a thin veneer of so-called respect to the original author, but was merely nothing more than contempt really. I simply fail to see the need to ever do this while publicly attaching an author's name and work title and arrogantly parade your own work as superior to their own. Why tear down someone else?

I pushed back against them directly on this post, they took it down, but not before childishly trying to excuse their actions and claiming that 'if someone is publicly posting, then they should be able to handle vocal criticism.'

But you know what? One, what that person was doing was not constructive criticism. I think back to the beta session I had with a friend right after this incident and I think to myself, how sad must it be that this is what this person thinks is valuable criticism. That this is the way they chose to engage with the fanfiction community and thought they were in the right to do so.

Two, and perhaps even more importantly, people are accountable for the things that they post. The things that they say. It would have cost this person nothing to never make those posts in the first place. To never risk an author coming across a mean-spirited and malicious teardown of the work they put hours into and risk harming their self-esteem, mental health, or confidence in their own writing.

Because we do not know who these people are behind their handles. We do not know if they're new to writing. If they are experienced but going through a tough time. There are real people who write the content you choose to consume.

Fanfiction is a collaborative process. Writers provide the free content, and it is the reader's responsibility to know when their input would be valuable.

Is what you have to say helpful? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

If the feedback you want to provide does not hit at least two of those things, what you have to say does not matter. Period.

And I daresay that in the vast majority of cases, kindness should be considered mandatory out of the three.

In return, writers will often throw in ideas they've read out of reviews, they'll reach out to their most ardent followers for things like beta-ing or joining a discord server nowadays. There's always been a give and take in this community.

Fanfiction is a cornerstone of fandom for a reason. And it is particularly important in the queer community, going all the way back to actual physical magazines in which people mailed in their KirkxSpock fic decades ago. Over time we've experimented on the process, moved to countless different platforms, survived collapses of all sorts of communities, only to rally over and over again around each other to be able to tell the tales we wanted to see but were not getting as queer folk amongst mainstream media.

And in that time, it's been long agreed on in this space that you do not tear down another writer to build yourself up. Ever. Period. This has long been the only thing in fanfiction that has been aggressively policed, called out, and nipped in the bud when experienced members of this community come across it.

It will not be tolerated.

I shouldn't have to make this post, but I suppose this is the changing of the guard, so to speak. We have a new generation of fic writers and readers coming into the space daily and while so many of you are wonderful, creative, and welcomed members of this space that has been here long before me or anyone of my age, there are some who do not know how to act in the fanfiction community.

And it is up to us to make it clear in no uncertain terms that they will need to either get with program or be pushed out.

To become the best version of yourself as a writer requires hours of work, of posting again and again, of experimentation, of putting hints of your own life and experiences onto the page. The vast majority of us will never be published, and that's just fine for most of us. We engage in this hobby because of how joyful it can be to write something dear to our hearts, share it with the world, and be validated that others enjoyed the work that we put in.

Frankly, readers will always owe it to us to respect that process and work. To be respectful and kind when interacting with authors. Constructive criticism can be welcomed but perhaps ask if the author is open to it and do not take it personally if they are not. And if they are, then learn how to give it with the writer's best interest in mind rather than your own ego.

I don't ordinarily request reblogs to my posts, I rant into the void and it doesn't matter to me if anyone really interacts on an ordinary day lol. But today, I want to ask that people share this message out in your fandoms, because I will be tagging it in the fandoms I interacted in, both past and present. Because fanfiction is a common thread that unites so many of us, and I think this is an important reminder on how we need to be respectful and kind to one another in this space.

If you feel comfortable, I would also love to hear how fanfiction is important to you. How you got into it. Why you love to either read, write, or beta it.

This is hobby that is meant to be fun, so let's have fun.

#fanfiction #fanfic writing #fanfic readers #fanfic authors

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