#I’m not talented enough to do it by myself
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I’m rereading icebreaker for the third time and I’m telling you Dorian Hidalgo is the love of my life. I can’t even explain how much I love him.
#ice breaker#ice breaker a.l. graziadei#mickey james iii#jaysen caulfield#Dorian Hidalgo#guys I’m begging#please#please please please#give me more ice breaker content#I’m not talented enough to do it by myself#I can’t wait years for this fandom to pick up#i want it now#give it to me#my ice breaker
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Honestly I’m usually impressed more with the way a reader is characterized than the character themselves
#riv rambles#not because I’m picky about characterization of characters#that’s a separate issue#but I feel like if you read enough well executed fics and really sit on a character enough you could probably do them enough justice but#writing an mc that really draws in the reader’s attention takes a lot of care#and effort#and it impresses me#I think that writing an existing character has all the hard parts done for you. they have a backstory and a personality and maybe even a set#of troubles/issues that defines the core of their character and why they could make the choices they do#but the mc is a fresh slate and I’m sure a lot of writers base their mc’s off of themselves but also#a lot of times there uniquely written because of the plot itself and it just#really really makes me take a moment and go woah#when an mc has a well thought out backstory that’s properly written and gives you a compelling narrative but also makes you really think on#why is it that they chose to do the things they did or say the things they do and#once I find myself thinking deeply about those sort of things with an mc then I realize like#oh yeah this fic is a banger this is a well thought out and intricately written fic I found me a gem#anyway#writing is such a cool thing you really see some of the most talented people casually post stuff on the internet sometimes like it’s nothing
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If you like Kuwei, whatever you do, just don’t think about how he probably grew up isolated from his peers because of his father’s status. How he probably took to reading because no one around him could spare a single second for him. How, when he and his father had to flee the country and were captured by the Fjerdans, he probably realized that what happened to him was a perfect backstory for a main character of some epic story. How, when he had to watch his father try to create a drug that could enslave and kill nearly all Grisha in the world, people just like the two of them, his biggest comfort came from the silly belief that at the end of his story, he too would have everything that he wanted — a family, a lover, a friend, just anyone who would finally care about him. Recognition. Joy. Love.
How, when his father died and he was left alone, a small, delusional, cruel part of him was almost sure that it was necessary for him to then be loved. How, when the Crows came for him, deep down, he fully expected them to be his new family. How, even when everyone was cold to him on the ship, he still tired to convince himself that it was because one of theirs was on the brink of death. How he dumbly tried to tell himself that they won’t actually turn him over to the merchant that wants him because they’re reasonable people. How he spent his days and nights in a cold tomb, pushing down the memories of his now dead father and his grim future, all alone, curled up in a corner.
How he had developed a crush on Jesper, bright, kind, warm Jesper, as if he could do anything else, and then had to watch helplessly as that ray of sunshine ignored him, as he got closer to the boy that had his face. How his skills and efforts were ignored just because what he might know seemed far more important to the people around him. How, not more than two days before the auction where his death would be faked, he got kissed by the man he began to adore and then was disliked for it by the only member of the team that actually tried to befriend him for a while.
How he had to stand tall in front of all the people, all those merchants, the royalty, the warriors, the guards, the farmers, the children, everyone, all the people who came to the Church of barter just to see who he’d be sold to. How he had to trust the six teens who only had qualms about killing him because he was worth a whole lot of money, with his life as different governments called out numbers that could feed the whole world for an entire lifetime. How the last thing that he could’ve seen before he died if the bullet that hit his chest missed his button even by a single hair, was the chaos ‘Brekker and his Crows’ started.
How, when he woke up, he barely had any time to calm down because one of the teens, the Drüskelle, was dead. How he now had to mourn him now, too, along with all that he lost. How, when he was laying down on the ship to pretend he’s dead, he realized that the people he saw as his saviors less than two months ago, and as the thing that he wanted more than life, didn’t care for him at all anymore. That they might even be happier if he died. How, as he neared the sea, he couldn’t help but feel like he’d let his one chance at happiness higher along the canal and that he was now destined for a life of despair.
How, when he arrived to the Little Palace, he wasn’t met with kindness or friendly faces. How he had to hide the fact that the thing he worked on day and night was the cure to a drug that his father had created, a drug that could’ve destroyed Grisha all around the world. How he was their only hope in the war against Fjerda. How he spent his nights awake dreaming of being a part of the family that the Crows clearly were. How he couldn’t seem to fit in anywhere he went.
Most importantly of all, don’t think about the fact that he’d been alone all his life.
#since no one else seems to be rambling about him I had to do it myself#but seriously why do we as the entirety of TWO fandoms sleep on this man so fucking much???#he’s an amazing character we just didn’t get to see him a whole lot#but Zoya’s description of him (as snobbish as he is talented) should be enough to make us go feral about him#like yes he’s a little shit but 1) we love him for it and 2) so is Kaz and we love him too#and there is so much possible angst we can put him through???#and the relationships he’s have with the other characters??? we’re robbing ourselves of the duo that would be Zoya and Kuwei#or Wylan and Kuwei or Nina and Kuwei or Inej and Kuwei or Tamar and Kuwei or—#also he’s one of the most lonely characters in the damn Grishaverse and yet we haven’t done anything with that#(I’m here if anyone else wants to scream about this fifteen years old traumatized inferno (possibly) orphan)#kuwei yul bo#kuwei my beloved#six of crows#grishaverse#wylan van eck#wylan hendriks#jesper fahey#crooked kingdom#kaz brekker#wesper#soc#ck#rule of wolves#king of scars#inej ghafa#nina zenik#matthias helvar#inferni#the grisha trilogy#grisha
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can someone pretty please make a buddie video edit to glee’s “Pretending” please🥺👉👈
#i’m not talented enough to do it myself#please#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911 on abc#911 buddie#buck and eddie#oliver stark#ryan guzman
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Maaan I love the optimistic advice "keep practicing and you'll get better at art" as much as the next artist, but it always rubs me the wrong way when that evolves into "just keep practicing and you WILL 100% succeed and CAN get into the industry."
It changes from good general advice to implying you're just doing something wrong if still haven't "made it" yet. Not in the industry? Well, you just haven't worked hard enough, obviously, as if there aren't plenty of other factors that play into "succeeding” in a highly competitive industry like art.
Don’t let advice that’s supposed to be encouraging turn into something discouraging 😭
#there’s a lot more to worming your way into the art industry than just. studying art real hard and working your bones off#hard work only gets you so far.#a lot of ‘success’ also starts at childhood and that goes for any industry#having supportive family and even better if they’re financially supportive#good early education. good physical and mental health. the ability to focus and do the same task over and over for hours#good social skills- because networking gets you a lot further than pure talent alone.#growing up in a convienaint location to even network at all. or the power to travel to such a location.#natural talent puts you ahead. brains work differently so it’s ignorant to pretend natural talent isn’t a thing#some take to a skill faster than others because their brain comes out more wired for it. so their skills develop easier and faster#music never came to me. I can’t hear the tone of my own voice most of the time. I DID study music and take mystic classes as a teen#it’s insulting to be banged over the head with ‘if you study music you’ll start to get it.’ I’m 28#I know myself and have tried during an age which music is easier to learn and yet I did not. I don’t have talent for it- my brain doesn’t-#-grasp it. the same with any art. some will struggle more to learn visual art ‘good enough’ for the industry#and implying that they just don’t get it yet becasue they haven’t tried hard enough is insulting#you can always get better. always always!! but sometimes grinding is just… grinding. fruitless and painful#I failed algebra twice as a teen. I couldn’t understand punnet squares till my 20s.#saying work harder and you’ll become a math professor would be insulting. implying I never tried to learn at all.#implying that even tho I took tutoring multiple times that maybe. if I just took one more. poor id suddenly be more able.#people work hard and it just clicks and 10 years later you’re in a great art industry job… you’re not the rule. you’re the exception#ugggh sorry :p just frustrated. sometimes people just don’t realize the kind of luck they’ve had in life and it irritates me
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We did it folks graduation achievement unlocked >:D
#class of 2024 hs grad#okay but I feel like I just had a character growth moment tho#just last week I was avoiding all discussion about it and pretending it’s never gonna happen#putting on a stoic emotionally detached mask to remove myself from how distraught the end was making me#but then proceeding to silently cry in the car under the weight of never making connetions like this again and the inevitable struggles#then a couple days of being bitter that everyone wanted to celebrate my graduation when I wanted it to be miserable#aaaand then this week I’ve just been like ‘meh yeah why not’ lol#just totally nonchalant and treating it like an average day#but after getting some last casual conversations in there and simply chilling/hanging out with these people I’ve known#can safely say graduation was a good experience#and honestly far more pleasant then the initial heartache I anticipated for months#I mean yeah the concept of everyone I care about being ripped away from me is still enough to tense my throat#but overall I’m far more accepting of the transition and even relieved that it’s over with#especially after today and realizing ‘yeah wasn’t too bad could do again’ jksjsksp#accidentally came to terms with it in a satisfactory way in the span of a singular day how about that#and will be fine until the moment someone starts antagonizing me about getting a job 🙃#also thank you mom for taking a grainy photo resolution to save my identity hehe (was unintentional)#also this is unrelated but the amount of people who decorated their caps was incredible. Genuinely such talented people out here#they personalized the hell outta those handmade designs and I applaud the attention to detail#update#random#personal thing
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imagine a world where I wasn’t an artist and these were made by someone else
if you were to tell me these were all made by the same person I wouldn’t believe you
#I really don’t give myself enough credit for what I’m capable of doing lmao#sometimes the negativity and self hatred consume me too much to the point where I don’t see value in what I can create#I don’t acknowledge my talent enough#self love is a bit hard
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I have gotten really good at, specifically, this!
I can’t wait to get the script all updated and everything working so other people can use my project. The ultimate flex is being so good at something you make other people better at it also.
#anytaur#I’m SO smart and SO talented yay#Yay for me! Yay <3#Maybe when it’s all finished I can finally rest. Well no then I optimize my personal#I won’t give up until I’m an FBT Excellent taur in the club taking up like 1MB texture memory#ok I probably can’t get it to a mb. But#I DO want to experiment with an alt texture/UV that has like my face and pawpads as a decal#and the rest gradient tiny tiiiiny texture#I might need to learn enough about shaders to put detail normals on a directional map myself—#Other shaders have in-Unity grooming tools that allow you to paint your own directional map right. Well#I can paint my own directional map#and then figure out how to apply it to detail normals#and THEN I think I can pack a whole lot of punch into less than say 10MB texture memory
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since the release of the smiling friends DVD commentary for the first season I knew something like this would inevitably happen but it’s still disheartening to see tidbits that are very obviously unserious joaks get lauded as the word of god because the creators Said It Is So
like y’all. these two dudes have been internet comedy clowns for years, have Any of you considered the possibility that they’re, yknow, fucking with you when they say some goofy shit because they know a portion of their shows fandom will 100% take it sincerely and unironically, obsessed and fixated on The Great Almighty Canon. like I’m not trying to be a #hater I just have developed a sense to pick up when a piece of information is in jest for funnies. I was raised on rancid irony poison of the golden trolling age of the internet lol it’s not my show or characters etc etc and ill eat this post if its set in stone in an episode but I really doubt deep-cut lore is a priority they hold to satiate some fans out of good faith
#like bro glep is not married to a woman named fuckin Marge Simpson. be for real. get creative as a fan#I’ve seen that dumb lil factoid used as legit reference in a short analysis video taken completely seriously despite it#you can especially say any insane shit about a character that is definitely not going to reappear#like I can’t be the only one in the fandom who’s ignoring shit like that bc idgaf about either zach or michaels preexisting net fame right#I know enough about them to know I’m not makin myself a fan of their general cOnTeNt outside of the tv show airing on AS#they’re talented internet funnymen I’m sorry I just could not care less about the oney legacy😭I’m here for the dipshit cartoon exclusively#this is the pain of seriously considering a show thats entirely based on chaotic absurdism comedy. i do this to myself
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due to Life Shit I kind of stopped drawing much about a year or two after I graduated high school bc I just kind of didn’t have the time or mental/emotional/physical capacity to fit it in, despite art being something I really want to be a part of my career. It kind of makes me sick to realize how much muscle memory I lost just from that time (I had only about a year and a half total of absolutely no art but that was enough. doesn’t help that during that time I seriously injured my hands) considering I’ve been drawing my entire life. I really wish things had not gone that way and that I could have kept going, but expectations were on me to do something else and any time I sat down to draw was treated as wasting time. There’s also something weird about recovering from severe trauma that kind of adjusts how you engage with a hobby you used as a coping mechanism, which Art very much was. I almost never drew vent art, but I used it to focus on something and make myself happy and proud of work I actually could do, and once I was out of the environments that funneled me into drawing (being forced to go to church, school, anything involving sitting down for a long period of time) I found less time to actually have an excuse. Someone bought me a single college course of art classes right out of high school, and I think that was where I COULD have had the opportunity to really get started if I had actually had the money to continue and the college hadn’t been so far away. After that course ended I didn’t have that excuse anymore. I used to draw in DeviantArt and Discord art groups, but those began to fall apart and soon I didn’t have that option either. After that I doodled but didn’t really create Full Pieces unless some friend asked it of me, and it was never a commission bc I’d never trained myself to get that sort of shit done without taking too long, so I’d always do it for free. So even that wasn’t a big motivator eventually. Now that I’m struggling for work after becoming more physically disabled after COVID, all that time I could have spent honing my art skills so I could do SOMETHING with my art really is weighting down on me. I have the option to do freelance work, illustrations, pet commissions, even things like cards and cookies. I’ve seen these avenues open up for me gradually, but I’ve lost the skills I built up that I need to actually make something I’m proud of. I’ve taken to tracing old art to try and remember my thought process and my “style”… but my memory was bad BEFORE the covid, and it’s worse now, and my brain fog makes it hard to focus even if I could get back on the train of thought. I don’t remember the construction that would be in my mind’s eye. I barely can keep a clear vision in my mind’s eye anymore, worryingly. I never had a crystal clear imagination, it was always sort of abstract, but I could see the lines, I could construct a scene. Now I have to focus hard to get any sort of detail clear in my head. It’s like if you tried to look directly into someone’s face in a dream, or put in a prompt in neural blender. So I have to adjust to performing the entire thought process physically, slowly and tediously trying to figure out what I’m imagining before I can really get started. Those old art tutorials for constructing shapes and bodies and such just aren’t coming naturally anymore so I have to dredge deep into my mind to remember which advice helped “click” the best and knowing it might not do it this second time around. It’s like if you forgot how to ride a bike. It was something natural to you, you could even get started haphazardly and distracted and still be able to tell where you were going and not fall over or trip on yourself, but now it’s like you have to focus on each step and it constantly feels like it’s taking everything you have to not crash. I’m glad I can start drawing again, but it hurts that something so huge in my life has been turned into this. I’ve ranted about it before it’s just easier to notice when you’re not sketching out people’s pets or doing super stylized doodles.
#I didn’t know you could max out a ‘text block’ on tumblr also. my indication to stop LOL#long post#vent#kind of. I’m not like super angsty abt it I’m just sad that I have to spend more time remembering#instead of actually accomplishing anything with my dreams. I’m 26 and there’s 18 year olds living my fucking dream yknow#I know you don’t have a certain age requirement for art but I also know you never stop improving#and being set back before I was even proud enough to set prices for my work is kind of devastating#I just love art. I want to be an animator or something involve with creative concepts.#I want to make things I’m proud of. but what used to come easily now feels like chewing nails#the metal ones not the cartilidge. anyway#I know I’m kind of hard on myself but it’s hard not to be when you’re surrounded by people with such talent#and it feels like you’re running behind when you see people getting to their dreams so much sooner than you.#I know it’ll happen but it hurts sometimes remembering what I used to imagine id be doing at this age#and realizing past me probably had more of a chance at these careers than I do right now bc of brain damage and physical and mental issues#it’s not confirmed if I have brain damage but like. I can tell something is different.#it’s not like they’d be able to diagnose it by now or even that it’d change anything#I just have to keep going and keep trying. it’s just discouraging and frustrating#I wish I could summon all the memories from my brain back up so I could feel happier about my art#I’m happy to have the chance to start drawing again don’t get me wrong. I still like to draw. it’s just.#I can tell the difference between how it was and how it is now and it makes me mourn#ough I wish I still had a therapist lmao. Deb get the fuck back here you traitor.
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I wonder if there’s actually people that would pay me to draw for them lol
#random post#like. how would I even market myself#everything I’ve made since Christmas has a different vibe and look to it#and everything I’ve done digitally overall has a different feel to it all too#idk. I really am down for whatever (sfw wise as I don’t have enough practice in more adult things lol)#like. I can draw humanoid characters. anthro characters. full animal characters. with a ref I can draw robots or in specific media styles#with my own flair obviously. I can’t get styles EXACTLY like the source material lol. I’m always down to try smth new#I’m not fazed by suggestive material or horror stuff#idk man. I like to think I’m talented and can do things but I can’t exactly KNOW until I actually DO this stuff#anyways uhhh if you wanna help me practice.... you should hit up my inbox with requests 👉👈 I’m down
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ummmm
#oh mika there is beauty in life~ look at your future! everything will be worth it in the end~#my favorite image on this device btw ^#cw negative#cw vent#you know where this is going. apologies my mind is a mess and i really just need to get it out because i find its better than-#-writing a semi formal email to that One (1) emotional support organization and i’m afraid to make a call so#but i just genuinely believe things would be better off if i weren’t alive. a bit of a silly thing to jump to i know but#my tuition fees aren't cheap and i'm not even that great of a student or a daughter or a sister and i-#-have no talents or remarkable feats. i’m not impressive in any way. and i hate hearing shit about how ^_^ its okay! we all have something-#-special about ourselves! for example maybe you have really good hand writing and thats good enough ~ but that doesn't work for me because-#-i have nothing. my handwriting isn't good my singing isn't good i'm not artistically gifted i don't have some random affinity for puzzles-#-i'm not charming or somehow really good at calculation or super creative or a really comforting friend i really have nothing at all#i don’t want to die. i have no plans on doing that sort of thing anytime soon— don’t misunderstand me#i just wholeheartedly believe i don’t deserve to be here anymore not because i’m not loved. i just can’t stand myself and my teenage years-#-feel so long and i'm so fragile how much longer do i have to tolerate. i'm contributing nothing. why should my family have to feed and-#-clothe a burden like me who provides nothing. why should my friends care for someone like me. i’m not really that funny or sweet or great-#-with advice giving or pretty or helpful in any way. why is it that life is genuinely easier for others. what did i do? what can i do?#how much longer must i tolerate this? would you believe me if i said i really did try to change my mindset this time?#i have no one in real life to talk to. therapists are pricey and i don’t think mine was helping me in any way anyways. she was nice though#so every night i sleep hoping i wake up somewhere else. somewhere where i'm happier and i can live all my silly fantasies where i'm a fun-#-and lovely person who has everything she wants and nothing goes wrong ever!!#how much longer must i hang onto the little things. i’m in such an exruciating amount of pain that i want to kill myself without dying? lol#everyone repeats the same stuff. get bit#i can't rely on the joy of having coffee every morning or persevere for the sake of seeing cute cats on insta. nothing will ease the burden
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Has nobody redrawn panels from the Ace manga in Oda’s style??
#I feel there’s so much potential there#I fear I’m not skilled/talented enough to do it justice myself smh#one piece#ace#my post#ramblings
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Title: Illuminated.
Pairing: Yandere!Apollo x Reader (Greek Mythology).
Word Count: 1.0k.
TW: Stalking, Unbalanced Power Dynamics, No Specified Gender For The Reader But They Are A Hunter Of Artemis, and Implied Kidnapping.
[Commissioned Piece. Donate To Palestinians In Gaza Here.]
“You, my love, are the poet’s demise.”
You stiffened at the sound of his melodic voice, shrinking into yourself before thinking better of taking on such a mouse-like posture and straightening. Still, you failed to stop yourself from crossing your arms over your chest, pulling your knees up and hoping beyond hope that the silvery water would be enough to hide your form from his unfaltering stare. You thought it’d be safer to bathe at night, apart from your sisters, when the softened moonlight protected you from his burning gaze, but you’d been naïve to think that any hour could be late enough to spare you haven. During the day, you lived under the burning gaze of his blazing chariot, busied yourself with shooting down hawks and ravens carrying gifts in their beaks, and at night, he had no burdens to keep him from closing the distance between you using less... ancillary methods.
“I’m afraid you must be mistaken, my lord.” You forced yourself to laugh, glancing over your shoulder. Sure enough, Apollo stood on the river’s opposing bank, his tanned skin nearly radiant in the darkness. If the sight of him hadn’t brought you such dread, you might’ve thought him beautiful. “As of late, my aim’s been so poor that I can hardly call myself a stag’s demise, let alone a man’s.”
You were quick to look away from him, but you could still hear his gentle hum, picture the way his lips would lilt upward as he shook his head. “I’m afraid it’s deathly true,” he went on, taking a step forward. The water rushed to part as he stepped where it had once been, and in turn, you scrambled for the robes you’d left on the shore, barely managing to pull the ashen cloth around yourself before Apollo came to stand in front of you, his light quickly doing away with what little protection the shadows offered. It was only after you were haphazardly dressed that you considered it might be considered an affront to hide any part of yourself from divinity, but the worry was quickly forgotten. It was only natural to want to create yet another barrier between you and him. Even insects knew to run from their betters. “For even the most talented bard would struggle beyond words to describe your beauty. They could be chained to their desk for an eternity, study under the Muses’ own tutelage, and still be unable to write a single line.”
He held out a hand to you, but you pretended not to realize he meant for you to take it. “You’re far too kind. If you have a message for Lady Artemis, there’s no need to bribe me with such—”
“My love,” he cut in, his smile unwavering. “If I had any desire to speak to my sister, your help would not be necessary.”
“A prophecy concerning our next hunt, then? If there’s something we mustn’t do, I ought to get the Huntmaster, she’ll—”
“My love.” You felt your throat tighten, your mouth go dry. “Although your voice is sweeter than honey and lovelier than birdsong, I’ll admit – I do find myself rather irritated when it’s used to employ such thinly veiled excuses. Any more, and I might think it better to encase your tongue in gold. At least, then, I might have something charming to admire while you lie to me.” His fingers grazed over your jaw as he moved to cup your cheek. It was not a gesture you had the luxury of ignoring. “You know why I have come here.”
Oh, how you wished you’d gone with your sisters.
“I… I can’t, my lord.” Unlike his, your voice was perfectly capable of trembling, of shaking, of plummeting into the sort of jarring, unsteady downward inflections that would’ve been the death of any proper storyteller. “My vows are to Lady Artemis, and—” It was your turn to smile, now, to lilt your head to the side apologetically. “—she’d never forgive me if I broke them. Especially with you.”
For the first time, his good humor seemed to ebb, giving way to not anger, but a melancholy sort of disappointment. “I suppose you’re right,” he relented, his golden glow dimming ever so slightly. Suddenly, it did not hurt quite so unbearably to look at him. “It’s a terrible thing. Me and my sister never did learn to share.”
Relief nearly managed to overshadow your revulsion. “I really am sorry. My desire is not to insult you, but—”
This time, when he interrupted you, it was not with a teasing remark, a nectar-dipped pet name, the vague implication of an affection he expected you to return. Rather, there was a sudden brightness in his golden eyes, a sharpened point to his smile, and then, his lips were pressed into yours. The kiss was shallow, but lingering, and when you tried to draw back, the hand on your cheek kept you firmly in place – his hold not crushing, but steadfast, resolute. His unoccupied arm wrapped around your waist, his hand finding its place at the small of your back as he sapped the last of the breath from your lungs. It was only when your palms pressed into his chest, your blunt nails burrowing into his bare skin in a silent plea for air, that he pulled back. Panting and flushed, you made a desperate effort to pull away, to escape back to your encampment, back to your sisters, back to your goddess, but he only cooed, his bowstring calloused fingertips fanning over your cheek.
“Such a terrible thing,” he muttered, and you considered, briefly, that you might’ve been the first mortal to realize just how wretched his voice truly was.
“How fortunate it is, then, that you’ve caught the attention of such a selfish admirer.”
#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere imagines#yandere greek gods#yandere greek mythology#yandere apollo#apollo x reader#yanderecore#yancore
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A Decade Of Love : ̗̀➛ Charles LeClerc
summary: as you and charles celebrate ten years together, take a look at a snapshot of your social media for each one of those years
pairing: charles x childhood sweetheart!reader
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2015
liked by georgerussell63, charles_leclerc and 4,859 others
ynusername: turns out dating a racing car driver doesn’t stop him being a sickeningly sweet boyfriend too 💕🥺
797 comments
username1: I can’t get over how much of a sweetheart charles is 😭
charles_leclerc: you’re not supposed to expose this side of me to the rest of the world ❤️
username2: the little note on the coffee cup, I can’t-
pierregasly: I refuse to believe that charles managed to make a meal that delicious 🙂↔️
username3: now that is a man who suits racing gear!!
georgerussell63: this screams like an apology for ignoring you for the entire weekend whilst racing 🤷🏻♂️
ynusername: @/georgerussell63 not a single damn text 😭
username4: why do I get the feeling we’re going to be seeing these two in many racing paddocks in the future??
arthur_leclerc: can you have a word please? he’s not this nice to me 💔
ynusername: @/arthur_leclerc isn’t that the job of a brother?? 😂
username5: officially decided that I need to find myself a charles leclerc to love me 😂
alex_albon: stop showing off how lovely your boyfriend is 🙄
username6: wishing I had a guy to bring me breakfast in bed too…
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2016
liked by alex_albon, nyckdevries and 37,953 others
charles_leclerc: the most chaotic year…gp3 series 🏆 ferrari academy ✅ haas test driver 🏎️…so excited to see what the future holds now!
3,969 comments
username7: can’t believe the progress you’ve made this year charles, we’re so proud of you!!
alex_albon: now you’re just showing off with all these achievements 😂👏🏻
username8: a season that most could only dream of 👏🏻
ynusername: could not be prouder of you…only upwards from here 🥳
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername thank you for constantly dealing with me stressing this year 😂❤️
username9: ferrari are the luckiest team in the world to have you ❤️🏎️
nyckdevries: an honour to share the track with you this year ☺️
username10: counting down the days until we inevitably see you in f1 now… 🤞🏻
scuderiaferrari: we’re so excited to have you on board charles, congratulations on a brilliant season!
username11: I hope you’ve got a bigger trophy cabinet at home 😂
pierregasly: I’m so proud to see you achieving your dreams brother!
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2017
liked by landonorris, ynusername and 68,492 others
charles_leclerc: such an incredible season, so proud to be the formula 2 champion. thank you to the amazing team who have supported me this year and all my family and friends for making so many sacrifices for me too ❤️🏎️
15,942 comments
username12: speechless, so unbelievably proud of you charles ❤️
pierregasly: can’t wait to see you show them how it’s done next year 🥺
username13: shut up the face on the first photo melts me…
ynusername: you never fail to blow me away with how talented you are 💕💕
username14: such an insane driver, f1 has no idea what’s about to hit it 🏎️
arthur_leclerc: okay, I’ll admit it, it’s pretty cool being able to say that you’re my brother 🙄
charles_leclerc: @/arthur_leclerc I knew you loved me really
arthur_leclerc: @/charles_leclerc let’s not get ahead of ourselves here 😂
username15: one incredible season, enjoy your rest as you deserve it 😘
alex_albon: such a joy to share the track with you again this year, good luck for next year buddy 🏆
charles_leclerc: @/alex_albon ik you’ll be there to join me soon enough!
username16: will f2 ever see a more dominant champion in its existence than you?? (no is the answer btw)
landonorris: at least you’re going one of us might have a chance next year 😂
username17: still not over how amazing this season has been, I can’t stop crying 😭
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2018
liked by arthur_leclerc, lancestroll and 13,960 others
ynusername: spend half my time lost around the paddock 😂 but I’m so proud to watch you achieve your dreams charles (even if I can only wave to you from the other side of the garage!!)
3,078 comments
username18: I can’t believe the guy I supported in go karts all those years ago is in f1 🥹
arthur_leclerc: we can be lost together soon enough 😂
username19: yn you must be so proud of your man!
maxverstappen1: it’s been so nice to see you again recently and catch up after all these years!!
username20: thank you for being by his side for all these years ❤️
charles_leclerc: I love having you here with me for so many races, thank you for always supporting me 💞
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc i wouldn’t have it any other way ☺️
username21: girl I feel you, I went to one f1 race and spent most of it staring at a map 😂
pierregasly: I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve found you lost this year 😝
ynusername: @/pierregasly no one prepares you for how much busier f1 is compared to f2…
username22: it must be amazing to get to see f1 up close and personal like this
landonorris: I won’t be coming to you for directions when I join next year then 😂
ynusername: @/landonorris got no idea where mclaren is half the time anyway 🙈
username23: I bet charles is just happy to have you there, we all know how much he adores you!!
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2019
liked by lewishamilton, scuderiaferrari and 289,694 others
charles_leclerc: dreamt of this moment for so long, officially an f1 winner, don’t think I’ll ever tire of hearing that 🏎️🏆
59,491 comments
ynusername: I’ve just about managed to pull myself together 😂 so proud of you my love 💓
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername thank you for always cheering me on even when I’ve doubted myself ☺️
username24: we’re all so proud of you charles, we knew you could do it!!
maxverstappen1: good job my friend, we’ve talked about this for so long and now it’s finally come true 🏆
username25: fyi I will not get over this for a very long time 🎉
sebastianvettel: congratulations partner, the first of many for sure 🍻
username26: I’m not sorry for how emotional I’ve been all day about this win
alex_albon: knowing how hard you’ve worked, there’s no one more deserving of this 👏🏻
username27: is there a more deserving man in f1? no, I think not.
scuderiaferrari: we couldn’t be prouder to have you on our team charles 🏎️
charles_leclerc: @/scuderiaferrari thank you to the whole team here and at home for all their hard work ❤️
username28: your dad would be so proud of you today charles ❤️
username29: I’ll remind you that you’re an f1 race winner everyday forever 🫶🏻
landonorris: thank goodness there were no “inchidents” in the race to ruin things 😂
charles_leclerc: @/landonorris 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2020
liked by arthur_leclerc, pierregasly and 429,707 others
charles_leclerc: missing all the fam right now, and wishing I could get back behind the wheel - lucky for yn tho as she’s stuck with me 😂🫶🏻
69,402 comments
scuderiaferrari: we all can’t wait to be back and enjoying race weekends too ❤️🏎️
username30: how is it fair for a family to look as good as these guys??
ynusername: it’s cute that you think I’m lucky with your ass annoying me constantly 😂
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername I can expose your habits too if that’s a challenge???
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc I’m sorry I love living with you sweetie 🥺
username31: so pleased you and yn have each other during these uncertain times 🫶🏻
username32: can’t wait to see you hopefully back around the track once everything is safe again
arthur_leclerc: I miss you guys so much, hopefully not too much longer until we’re reunited ❤️
username33: please make sure you stay safe charles 🙏🏻
username34: I bet poor yn is being driven insane living with charles 24/7 😂
pierregasly: offended that I wasn’t included in this post…
charles_leclerc: @/pierregasly dedicated post just to you incoming…
username35: idk how much longer I can cope without f1 in my life 😭
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2021
liked by carmenmmundt, sebastianvettel and 97,592 others
ynusername: drove me all the way out to the middle of nowhere to ask me to marry him, easiest yes of my life 🥺🥂
26,942 comments
carmenmmundt: stfu I’m so unbelievably happy for you both ❤️❤️❤️
username36: I cannot begin to tell you how happy this post makes me!!!
carlossainz55: might’ve just shed a tear when I saw this post 🥲
charles_leclerc: no one else I’d want to spend the rest of my life with, I love you darling 💞
username37: he finally did it my faves are engaged ahhhhh
username38: is it acceptable to cry over someone else’s engagement btw???
landonorris: wedding of the century pending…⏳
arthur_leclerc: couldn’t be happier to finally be welcoming a sister into the family 🫶🏻
ynusername: @/arthur_leclerc and just so you know you’re definitely in my top two when it comes to brothers in law 😂
alex_albon: congratulations you two, lily and I could not be happier for you ✨
username39: wish I was a fly on the wall during the conversations as to who best man is gonna be 😂
pierregasly: he’s talked about doing this for so long, glad he’s finally done it 😍
username40: all my manifesting has finally paid off 🙏🏻
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2022
liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 1,593,068 others
charles_leclerc: taking us back to the place a year ago when I asked my best friend to marry me, still the best decision of my life 💞🌊
104,856 comments
username41: charles is such an old school romantic I love it
ynusername: still just as special as it was the first time around 🤍
maxverstappen1: please tell me you didn’t actually let charles be the one in charge of that boat 🤦🏻♂️
ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 I promise it was somehow returned in one piece
username42: and he still looks as happy as he did a year ago too 🥺
pierregasly: offended that you somehow think you’re his best friend 🤯
arthur_leclerc: @/pierregasly me too, cause obviously that’s my role and not yours 😉
georgerussell63: he’s just a hopeless romantic isn’t he 😅
username43: not all the boys just rinsing charles for being in love lmao
landonorris: if anyone wants an example of a soft fiancé…here you go!
carlossainz55: I’m just here cause I’m enjoying watching charles get wrecked in the comments 😂
username34: 🍿🍿🍿
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2023
liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 294,608 others
ynusername: best day of my life 💍💒
48,492 comments
carmenmmundt: thank you for inviting george and I to be part of your special day 💕
username35: these photos are the definition of STUNNING ✨
danielricciardo: please tell me charles managed to make it home in one piece??
ynusername: @/danielricciardo he’s currently crying about how hungover he is 😂
alex_albon: couldn’t be happier for two of my favourite people in the entire world ❤️
username36: can we pause for a second cause charles has officially taken my breath away
sebastianvettel: congratulations, you look absolutely beautiful yn!!
charles_leclerc: I love you, can’t wait for forever with you 🥂
username37: I always knew charles would look good in a suit but damn I was not prepared for this
lewishamilton: arguably the best wedding I’ve ever been to, such a lovely day 🫶🏻
username38: I can’t wait to see the rest of the photos after seeing these!!
landonorris: I think I’ve just about stopped crying now 😭
kellypiquet: without shadow of a doubt the most beautiful bride I’ve ever seen 🤍
username39: don’t think I’m gonna be over these for a long time…
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2024
liked by carlossainz55, arthur_leclerc and 2,605,638 others
charles_leclerc: don’t think this will sink in for a while, thank you to everyone who supported me in monaco this weekend!! so proud to finally win my home race, now to celebrate in style 🎉🏎️
285,047 comments
username40: all the hard work has finally paid off…king of monaco ❤️
ynusername: don’t think I’ve ever been prouder of you in 10 years, lifelong dream accomplished 💞👑
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername you’re the best, couldn’t have got here without you ❤️
carlossainz55: couldn’t be happier for you, I know just how much this means to you!
username41: we’re all so proud of you charles, congratulations on an incredible win
arthur_leclerc: after so many near misses, it just makes this all the more sweeter brother 🏎️🏁
username42: no one prepares you for the emotion of charles winning monaco wtf 😭😭
pierregasly: the one you’ve always dreamt of, so glad it came true!!
maxverstappen1: enjoy the celebrations tonight, you so deserve this!
username43: my heart is still racing, feel like im in some sort of dream…
landonorris: don’t think that smile will be leaving your face for a while 😂
charles_leclerc: @/landonorris just me trying to fight back the tears 🥹
username44: no one can take this moment from you charles, soak it all in 🍾
scuederiaferrari: the whole team could not be prouder of you, congratulations charles ❤️🏎️
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
#f1#f1 imagine#formula 1#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x you#formula one#f1 reaction#formula one imagine#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc smau#formula x reader#formula 1 social media#formula one x reader#formula 1 fic#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 smau#formula one smau#f1 fluff#f1 fic#f1 smau#f1 x you
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Text
The Fool
Summary: As you lie, nestled into Astarion’s chest, he considers his feelings - his damned, complicated feelings.
Alternatively, Astarion experiences all 5 stages of grief in 10 minutes.
Rating: T Word Count: 816 Pairing: Astarion x GN!Reader Content: First person Astarion POV, fluff and angst, rather a lot of angst actually, feelings denial, Astarion needs a hug, cuddling, Astarion's simple plan beginning to fall apart.
Want to hear this fic read aloud with absolutely pristine acting by the incredibly talented CurlyChops on AO3? Have a listen here!
A/N: You know when you’re lying in bed, unable to sleep until you write down that idea that’s managed to worm its way into your brain at unspeakable hours of the night? Here we have a slightly angsty drabble that decided to do just that! After the reception to the Gale first person POV, I wanted to try my hand at an Astarion POV. Hopefully you enjoy!
A fool lies in this tent.
Look at you, nestled into my side, sleeping peacefully against my chest as if a vampire’s embrace is the safest place in all the realms. Utterly ridiculous. So trusting, so… pliant. All according to plan, really. I set the trap - a few choice words here, a few lingering touches there - and you walked right into it. Just like I knew you would.
Just like all the others do.
Well, not quite like all the others. You actually believe there's something redeemable in me, don't you? How deliciously naïve.
Do you even realise what you've fallen for? What I am? A monster, a liar, a parasite. Oh, my dear, the fool you are.
Though I suppose your particular brand of foolishness has its… uses. Your blind faith in my redemption is almost charming.
No. Not charming. It’s pathetic. Pathetically predictable. It can’t be charming. Because, if it is, I’m no better than the fool I mock.
You shift slightly in your sleep, and I resist the urge to recoil. This charade - this playing at romance, at desire - it shouldn’t affect me so. I’m above this. I’ve spent centuries perfecting the art of manipulation, of taking what I need. It was supposed to be easy: charm you, bed you, and secure my safety. A means to an end. But as I lay here, with your warmth pressed against me, my chest begins to tighten. Not in fear or hunger, but in something… complicated.
Anger begins to burn at the back of my throat. Good. Anger is familiar. It’s safer, easier to control.
This is your fault, you know. No, worse - it’s mine. My fault that I have been reduced to this - a creature desperate enough to sell the only scraps of autonomy I have left. You think this closeness is love, don’t you? But it’s not. It’s survival. It has always been survival.
But then again…
You’re not like the others at all, are you? Those who took without asking, without care. Your touch is… gentle. Always so damnably gentle. You’ve never grabbed, never demanded, never treated me like a thing to be used. With you, it hasn’t all been… bad. No, that’s not right - it’s been tolerable. Almost pleasant at times, really. Your touch doesn’t make my skin crawl; your voice doesn’t grate on my nerves. I tell myself it’s because you’re useful. That’s all this is.
That’s all it can ever be.
If I were to tell you the truth, what would you do? If I were to push you away, would you stay? If I were to let you in, would you hurt me? These questions gnaw at me, demanding answers I don't have.
Answers I don't want.
Even now, as you sleep, your fingers rest light as feathers on my chest. It’s maddening. Infuriating. How dare you? How dare you make this difficult? This was supposed to be simple. You were supposed to be simple.
I could kill you right now, you know. One quick movement, and all these feelings would disappear with you. Never again would you look at me like I'm something precious, something worth saving, like I’m–
“... Astarion,” you mumble drearily in your sleep.
Hells.
I should leave. I should push you away, remind you that I am not something to hold on to.
But I don’t move.
Instead, I stay. Because the truth, the awful, unbearable truth, is that I don’t want to lose this. The selfish man I am.
A sigh escapes me.
It’s exhausting. I’m exhausted.
Gods, what an absolute mess you’ve made of my carefully laid plans. I find myself watching you sleep, counting your breaths, fighting the urge to brush that strand of hair from your face.
When did this happen? When did I start to care whether you lived or died beyond your usefulness to me?
I hate this. I hate that you’ve made me feel anything at all, but more than that, I hate myself for not hating it more. The way you defend me, the way you’ve never once looked at me with disgust or fear… it’s terrifying.
You’re terrifying.
Yet I can't bear to give it away.
Your fingers curl into my shirt in your sleep, and I find myself pulling you closer despite every screaming instinct to push you away. Protecting you, as if I have any right to do so. As if I deserve the way you lean into my touch, trust in my words, believe in my capacity for - dare I say it - goodness. As if I deserve any of this.
The moonlight filtering through the tent catches on your sleeping face, and something inside me breaks. Or perhaps it's finally mending. I'm not sure I know the difference anymore.
A bitter laugh escapes my lips, so soft I’m certain it won’t wake you. How poetic. How utterly absurd.
You, the fool, who dared to fall for me.
And I, the greater fool for letting you.
Masterlist can be found here!
No Pressure Tags: @roguishcat, @davenswitcher, @silverfangmarks, @sparrowbard, @chonkercatto, @stokzr , @trafalgarussy , @asterordinary , @bite-me-tonight , @transparentkittenheart , @bg3-fanfic-reblogs
#we're in real sad boy hours lads#astarion x reader#astarion x tav#astarion x gn!reader#astarion fanfiction#astarion ancunin#astarion fluff#bg3#bg3 fanfic#bg3 fanfiction#astarion fanfic
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