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worldofkuro · 8 months ago

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Painted Smile

Painted Smile XV

Pairing: Alastor x Female! Reader

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Summary: You couldn't wait to meet new friends. What you didn't expect was this smiling little boy, only one year older than you, that would take such a big place in your life.

Notes: Because I wasn't satisfied with the last chapter I decided to post the next one right now. I’m so excited about your thoughts because the plot is finally beginning ! I can’t wait to hear about your theories.

“ It makes your boobs look ugly, another one please !”

You were being tugged behind the curtain already being undressed to put on another dress. Today you were with Alice, in one of the most expensive shops of all New Orleans, to find your wedding dress. It was an exciting, amusing and stressful experience. Alice was being, as usual, honest about the dress you have been trying for almost an hour.

“ Alice, how many more dresses do I need to try? You know we still don’t have a date for the wedding? Alastor’s father is still missing.”

“ What about it? His loss if he misses the wedding. Now, I think I’ve found the perfect dress for you~!”

You laughed behind the curtain. Alice didn’t even know Alastor’s father, she never met him but you have told her once that you didn’t feel comfortable with him and she decided that she would hate him until the end of time. You looked at the dresses you have been trying, a part of you was happy to be here with your best friend and yet you wondered…Were you selfish? You knew Alice was in love with Alyzée but they couldn’t get wed to each other… Were you hurting Alice without being aware of it?

“ Alice–?”

“ This one. This one will fit perfectly your waist, your legs, your shoulder, your chest. For heaven’s sake, I’m the best.” she said looking at her nails. Why were your best friend and your future husband so full of themselves while you were always insecure ! “ Come on, try this one.”

“ Alice.. I’m.. You’re okay?” you asked, taking the dresses off her hands.

“ Yes? Well, I’m still shocked about what you told me about John, but you know what we say, we don’t keep trash around us.”

“ Who is “we”?”

“ Me, Myself and I. Now, try the dress, doll ! I’ll find the shoes!” you laughed as you watched her running away. You sighed with a smile, you were surrounded by amazing people, you should try to be more sure about yourself.

The workers from the stores helped you put on the dress and your shoes. You looked at yourself in the mirror. You felt.. pretty. Really pretty. You smiled at yourself, moving the pans of the dress, loving the movement it was doing.

“ Can I see?”

“ Of course Alice.” you turned around. Since you could remember, Alice always knew how to dress you up. From her Christmas’s Eve’s soirée where she had found that beautiful dress from today, she would always come with outfits from other countries, always being new, unique, something Alastor scoffed most of the time. He was always saying that Alice was running toward the future without being aware of her surroundings. And Alice was always saying that Alastor needed to shut up because he was lucky to look good in anything.

“ Oh my Lord. You look ravishing, my friend!” she clapped her hands together, her eyes whelming up a bit. “ Oh God… I’m… I’m so proud of you.”

“ I haven’t done anything yet.” you laughed nervously.

“ Take the compliment for once. So, what do you think? I , personally, think it’s the perfect dress for you. But what do you think?”

“ This is my favorite too. but the price–”

“ Let me buy it.” you opened your mouth, ready to complain but Alice stopped you with her hand.” I know, I know, you’ve never liked me paying stuff for you, expensive things mostly. But please, just this one, let me buy it. I… The next time I go into this kind of shop might be for my own wedding, which won’t be filled with laughter and love like we just did. It might be selfish, but just.. I want this moment. I’m sorry–”

“ Okay.” you smiled, almost moved to tears by her comment “ But Alice, for your wedding, no matter with who, I’ll be there. There will be laughter and love, because you won’t be alone in this.”

You saw Alice nodded, wiping some tears from her eyes. You looked at her, your best friend might never be married to the one she loved, but you will never let her feel loveless.

You took off the dress, as Alice went to pay in cash. You joined her once you were dressed with your own clothes and you both walked toward her place. You saluted the butler, who bowed to you.

You both sat down in the huge living room, sighing in relief. You took off your heels, your feet were killing you.

“ By the way, if we need to find Alastor’s father to be able to have your wedding, do you want me to… pull a few strings for you? I could call the best of the best!”

“ No, no. I won’t lie, the fact that he is missing isn’t… bothering me.”

“ I’ll cheer for that. “ she winked at you before asking for wine. You laughed, she always loved Rosé. It wasn’t very strong in alcohol, it had a very good taste but when the alcohol hitted. Dear lord…

You didn’t drink too much, you had to walk back home yourself after all. You smiled when you saw Alice put on Alastor's broadcast even though she was rolling her eyes at the radio sometimes.

“ Are you hearing him? Gosh. I knew you when your voice was cracking, Alastor !” she shouted at the radio.

“ Alastor voice never–”

“ A woman can dream, dear. Gosh, now I hear his voice anywhere I’m going.”

You laughed behind your glass. Alastor was gaining popularity surprisingly quickly, which was good of course. It was the best outcome you could imagine.

“ Now, about my cottage.”

“ Alice, we told you we don’t have the money and you just bought me my wedding dress.”

“ Who is “we” my dear?”

“ Me, Myself and I.” You stuck your tongue at her, making her laugh. Alice was a girl ahead of her time with her manners and way of talking, she always felt like a breeze of fresh air.

“ Well, if you all say so.” She took a sip of a drink before looking at the door, her father making his entrance. You stood up as the big man smiled at you, he always has been nice, never raising his voice, always wanting what’s best for Alice.

“ Oh, good afternoon ladies. Alice, I just wanted to tell you that you might have a date with the son of the–”

“ Yes Daddy, I know, don’t worry I’ll go.” she said, looking away. You saw her father smile sadly before leaving after giving you both candy you used to like when you were younger. You looked at her, worried. Was she going to be okay? “ Don’t look at me like that Doll. It’s going to be the same as usual, I’m going there, bat my pretty eyes and at the end, I’ll just say to Daddy that the man wasn’t what we needed for the family.”

“ How long do you think you can keep this game going?”

She stared at the large windows in silence. Alice was just like a bird in a cage, she felt like freedom, but would never taste it for herself.

“ As long as I can.”

You stayed with her until the sun was setting down. The maid took her to her bedroom as she was sleeping on the sofa. Seems like going on another date was getting harder and harder for her. Was Alyzée aware of it? You sighed as you gave your goodbye, before walking out of the mansion.

You decided to go into a park, walking between the trees. There weren’t a lot of people outside, even though we were in March, the weather was still cold. You stopped when you saw an old man fall not too far from you.

“ Oh sir! Are you alright, let me help you!” you said as you took the cane that had fallen from his hand. You helped him sitting down on a nearby bench.

“ Oh, thank you little lady.”

The man was tall, black with brown eyes, a white beard, he was wearing a hat, helding on his cane, he seemed like he had injured his leg.

“ Do you want me to take a look at your leg? I’m no nurse, but I used to help my father when he came back from war.”

“ Ahh, war. You don’t need to take care of me, little lady.” he smiled warmly at you. “ You look sad yourself, do you need to talk about it with an old man?”

You looked at him, he felt so warm and he was… cute. His aura was gentle, cute like a kid that wanted to learn something new. You haven’t seen your grandfather since he died during the war, you haven’t had the strength to go back to your old country to go to his grave so… Maybe why not indulge yourself and talk with this man?

“ I’m… I want to help a friend, she is in love but can’t marry that person.”

“ Aah, love. And why can’t she?”

“ She had to marry someone from “noble blood”.” you sighed, rolling your eyes. It was bullshit. “ She has no choice.”

“ Mhn… I think she does, little lady. We always have a choice, when you think you don’t have one, it’s because you already made up your mind. “ he smiled at you with eyes that held so much wisdom.

“ But… What if the other choices are more dangerous?” you asked, feeling like you weren’t talking about Alice anymore.

“ Well, little lady. What would you do?”

You stopped talking. You killed to be with the one you wanted. You had a choice and yet..

“ Are you unhappy with the choices you made?”

“ No, but I’m afraid of what it will bring at my door.”

“ Aah.. Si jeunesse savait, si vieillesse pouvait.”

“ What?”

“ You will see, little lady. Your friend is maybe so blinded by what she has to do that she can’t see what she could do. Love is the deadliest poison and yet the sweetest remedy in the world. She should try to think for herself, don’t you think? Would you rather live your whole life in misery or be happy for a short time of your existence? The difference between existing and living is thin, little lady, but it exists.” he nodded before looking at the sky, seeming lost in thoughts.

You stared at this mysterious man. He seemed to be around 60, maybe that is why he seemed so wise. You looked at the sky and gasped when you saw the moon in the sky. It was already dark!

“ Oh, I need to go!” you stood up but before leaving you took the candy from Alice’s father. You smiled at the man, placing the candy in his veiny hands. “ Thank you for that useful advice.” You beamed at him as he looked curiously at the candy before smiling at you. “ Maybe we’ll see each other one day again !”

“ May our ways cross again if needed, little lady, may our ways cross…”

You ran back home, feeling better than when you left Alice’s house. You walked inside and saw your father with Jeff in the living room. They were still trying to understand how Alastor’s father could have disappeared like this. You smiled at the men, walking toward them.

“ Nothing news?”

“ No, my sweet daughter. We are trying, but from the moment he left the bar he wasn’t seen anymore.”

“ I’m sure the wife was having an affair and decided to kill the husband. Classic scenarios.”

“ And how could she have done that?” you sat on the sofa, staring at Jeff with an innocent smile. You almost smirked when you saw him puffing his chest, feeling so much pride in vomiting all the information he should kept away from you.

“ The man came home, drunk. She could easily poison him, hide the body somewhere and end the story.”

“ Mhn… But without a body, you don’t know. What if he was the one having an affair and ran away? From what I understood, he seemed to be someone who drank a lot, maybe he was being ambushed in an alley because we know for a fact he never made it back home.” you smiled at him, your father smiling with pride by your side.

“ That what they say but–”

“ No, that’s what we said. I was there. I’ve never seen this man come back home.” you stared at him down. He shut his mouth. “ You see, I really want to get married and the fact that you are trying to put the blame on my future family in law is getting on my nerves. So please, do me, us, a favor, find out what happened. And if you are unable to, just give up.” you looked at your father. “ I don’t want to wait forever, I want to get married.”

Your father stared at you before kissing your forehead.

“ Alright sweetie, we have a new man who’ll help us in this case. I’ll give him three months, if he doesn’t find anything, I will close the case and we will concentrate on your wedding.” you hugged your father with a happy grin. Finally!

You bid your goodbye before going into your bedroom, getting ready to go to bed. You listened to the noises downstairs, waiting for Jeff to go and your father to go to bed.

You were concentrating so much on trying to hear what was going downstairs that you didn’t notice the shadows behind you. You almost shouted as a gloved hand fell upon your mouth, muffling your screams.

“ You’re such an easy prey, dearest.”

You sighed in relief as you closed your eyes. Alastor was really the quietest being you have ever met, which was surprising when he was the noisiest man on the radio.

You turned your head toward him, looking at his mocking smile. He was so full of himself. You bit his finger before letting it go, going for a hug. He hummed against you.

“ How did you come here?”

“ Well, the windows, dear.”

You scoffed before forcing him to sit on your bed. You sat on his lap and took his hand with yours, playing with his fingers.

“ I have my wedding dress.” you smirked when you felt his whole body tensed underneath you. “ And you won’t see it, because I left it at Alice’s.”

“ Do you really need Alice in your life, dearest?” asked Alastor with an amused voice.

“ Yes! Come on Alastor, be honest with me, you enjoy Alice’s company?”

“ Hah ! I enjoy Alice’s contacts nothing more.” he rolled his eyes, pressing you against his body. “ She is useful and she can be amusing, when she is having problems.” he smirked at you, making you slap his shoulder, trying to contain your laughter. He was such a…

“ Well, I have some news on your father’s case, my dear future husband.” you smiled as you explained what happened with Jeff. You couldn’t help but grin when you saw Alastor beaming with pride as he listen to what you have told the policeman.

“ My, my… So, they think my Mother did it?”

“ For now, we know that we have three months until we are completely free of it.”

“ Have you felt it again?”

You tilted your head.

“ What?”

“ The need to kill.” he asked you, gripping your waist, pressing your body against his. You felt lightheaded.

“ N-N.. Well… I thought for a second.. to kill John.” you saw Alastor’s pupils dilated as he stared at you before kissing your neck. You tilted your head to give him more room.

“ Mhn, interesting, go on, why?”

“ Because he was bad mouthing you.” you tried to contain the anger in your voice, you didn’t want to wake up your parents. “ Who does he think he is?” you rolled your eyes, you were still hurt about what John has said but now you weren’t feeling sadness over it, only anger.

“ Would you like to kill him?”

You looked at Alastor who had his chin against your chest, looking at you in a way too innocent face for the conversation you were having.

“ Alastor, we can’t. There would be too much suspicion on us, we already have your father’s disappearance on us, if we kill John–” he kissed you feverishly making you sigh in the kiss. Oh, how you loved the feeling of Alastor’s lips against yours.

“ Do you hear yourself, darling?” he smiled against your lips. “ In your mind, you are already ready to kill him… ” he sighed against your skin. You stared at him, stroking his cheeks. You wanted to see the Alastor you had seen the first time you killed.

The difference between existing and living is thin, little lady, but it exists.

You kissed Alastor on the nose, with an excited smile.

“ Not now.”

You fell asleep with new marks on your thighs and your neck. When you woke up the next morning, you were already smiling.

You stayed with your mother all morning, spending time with her until you decided to go to Alice’s. You didn’t know when her date was supposed to be, but if you could help her morally before she had to leave, it would be great. You took some pancakes you’ve made and walked toward her mansion, the butler let you enter, escorting you to the living room.

“ Miss Alice shall be here soon.”

You nodded before sitting on the sofa. You put the pancakes on the table and wait until you hear the familiar footsteps of your best friend. You turned your head and smiled at her, as usual, she was beautiful.

“ Hello Alice.” you stood up and you both hugged each other. She sat next to you, holding her head in her hand. “ Mhn, the wine doesn’t taste good the day after, right?” you laughed as she groaned.

“ Please, not so loud…”

“ What a hangover.” you whispered, mockingly. She stuck her tongue at you before digging into your pancakes. “ Well, someone is hungry.”

“ I don’t want this man to think he has a chance with me because I seem eager to eat.”

You smiled, crossing your legs. You told Alice that you needed to wait three more months before finally concentrating on your wedding. You laughed as she let out a sigh of pure relief.

“ Thank God, since when do we stop living because a man disappeared.” she rolled her eyes before eating the last pancake. You look at the butler who came to announce Alice’s date. And like an actress, Alice put on the fakest smile she could conjure, Alastor would be proud. You stood up as a man, looking around 40 came into the living room, he was sweating so much you could see sweat pearling on his forehead.

You gave Alice a look, encouraging her with your eyes before leaving, you even made a face to the butler who nodded at you, with a disgusted face. You laughed before leaving, going out to buy some pastries. You walked to the park, thinking about your weddings. Where should you do it? What about the honeymoons? Did Alastor want children?

You stopped when you saw the same old man from last time, sitting on the bench, smoking a pipe. You grinned and walked toward him.

“ Hello, sir.”

“ Hello, little lady.”

“ Might I sit a moment with you?”

“ It would be my pleasure. You seem happier than yesterday.”

You smiled as you sat next to the man. You felt safe with him, maybe it was because his aura reminded you of your deceased grandfather..? You didn’t know. You began to talk, mostly about what was going on in your life until you began to talk about your wedding.

“ Mhn, you have quite the ring.” the old man said with a little grin. He didn’t have a ring on his fingers, did he never get married?

“ Yes, in less than three months, I will be able to concentrate on my wedding.”

“ Who is the lucky lad?”

“ If you are listening to the radio you might have heard him, his name is Alastor.”

“ Alastor heh..? Quite a name, quite a name…”

You smiled, happy that Alastor was getting a name to himself. You took your box of pastries and held one for your new friend. He thanked you before eating one éclair au chocolat. You smiled as you kept talking with him, the man mostly listening and giving you wise advice.

“ Being too confident is not a good thing, your insecurity might be a blessing on some occasions.”

“ What do you mean?”

“ Don’t be afraid, to feel afraid. The ones who don’t fear are gods, spirits…”

“ But it’s irrational.” you frowned, how many times you felt jealousy when you didn’t need to be.

“ Yes, but it’s instinctive. Here is some wise advice from an old man: trust your feelings. Did they ever betray you in the past, when you needed them, little lady?” he looked at you with a warm smile.

You looked at the ground. Your family always told you, you were sensitive, you would easily be overwhelmed by what you were feeling or what was going on around you.

But when Alastor’s father took the bullets, you didn’t know why, you felt it in your guts that something was going to happen. That’s why you had run outside to find Alastor and that's how you killed his father.

But then, why did you not feel John’s romantic attention towards you ?

“ People who feel a lot are trying to balance themselves by becoming observant. That way, they feel more grounded, they think they are being rational, which can be good sometimes. But you mustn't discard your feelings, you’ll lose yourself like that. You seem like a sensitive little lady, it’s not bad and it’s not good, that's what you seem to be. Why would you want to be like others, they are already busy being themselves.”

“ So.. I should listen to myself more?”

“ It’s a choice you can make. Feeling emotions is a good thing, it connects you to the rest of the world.” he nodded before looking at the sky, smiling warmly. “ And isn’t it beautiful?”

You stared at the man. He was such an.. intense person in a way. Would he talk to you the same way if he knew you had killed someone and you didn’t feel any kind of remorse?

“ What if… by being connected to the world, I might be a bad person?” you whispered.

“ That’s your choice. For some people you will be a bad person no matter what you do, no matter what you think.” he looked at his cane before eating the rest of his éclair au chocolat. “ Soldiers killed during war, the winners are seen as heroes, and the losers as cold blooded killers. Who is right? They all killed people, they all did horrible things and yet they aren’t seen as the same. Your father have killed during the war, right? What made him different from an enemy soldier?”

“ Because… he was fighting for what’s…right..?”

“ Who says?” he tilted his head, always having a gentle expression. He wasn’t judging you, he was just curious about your thoughts.

You couldn’t find an answer to his questions.

You stayed in silence for a moment, thinking about the man’s words. What was strange, was that his words weren't shaking your morals, but it was making you accept them. You had killed, you wanted to kill again, maybe not as strongly as Alastor, but you wouldn’t be opposed to killing again, if it was to protect. You knew it was the difference between you and Alastor, you would kill to protect while you knew Alastor would kill.. Because he wanted to.

And you accepted it, you accepted him, you accepted yourself.

You would be the wife to a murderer, maybe he would kill again, maybe not. You didn’t really care. You would be by his side, as promised.

You opened your eyes, feeling lighter. You didn’t expect to feel burdened by all of this, but maybe, the fact that you were trying to make the wedding happen was a way for you not to think about what happened.

You felt better.

You turned your head toward the man who was looking at the people walking in front of you. They weren’t looking at you, just walking, not even caring about you. You smiled.

“ Thank you. I feel… better.”

“ Is it a good thing?” he asked, amused. You grinned.

“ Well, for my own happiness, yes!”

“ Then, everything is good.”

“ I’m going to meet a friend.. But, can I have your name sir?”

The man stared at you with his usual gentle and wise expression. You waited politely, maybe he thought you were being rude, asking his name out of the blues?

“ Legba.”

You bid your goodbye before walking toward Alice’s home. You were going to encourage her to break free from her chains! She didn’t need to marry a sweaty man, she could handle herself perfectly! You entered the mansion, the butler escorting you once again in the living room. Now, you just need to wait!

You opened your eyes, not even realizing you fell asleep when you heard shouting at the front door. You walked toward the entrance and saw Alice and the sweaty gentleman, your friend was shouting at the man, demanding his departure from her house while he was clearly trying to calm Alice.

“ What is going on?”

“ This man is just a filthy pig! Touching me like I’m some kind of harlot.” she was fuming, trying to contain her rage. What did that man do? The man, who didn’t seem sure of himself became more confident, pointing at Alice.

“ Maybe that’s what you are, kissing the mayor’s daughter like this. What a scoop that would be, unless we come to an agreement of course. I think you would make a darling wife Miss Alice. I’ll let you think about it, and if you need more convincing, I have proof. Now, have a great night ladies.”

And just like that, he left.

Alice closed the door before dropping to her knees, breathing heavily. You took her in your arms, looking for a butler or a maid but nobody was around, which was weird. You tried to calm her but she was panicking.

“ He saw us.. He saw us kiss.. Oh lord, what could happen if he were to open his mouth about it.” she was shaking, nipping at her nails.

You calmly took her hand with yours.

“ Do you have any way to get rid of him?”

She looked at you, seeming torn to speak before sighing.

“ Don’t think I’m a monster but… Most of the richest families have.. people who do their dirty jobs? Sending… assassins or things like that..? I’ve never done that of course, but I feel so trapped right now… Oh, what Alyzée is going to think.”

“ She won’t need to think about it. Use your assassins.” you wondered if you were shocking her. Maybe you were a little too at ease with the idea of killing someone ?

“ No. They would report everything to my father and if they see the proof… My father would know about me and Alyzée.” she sighed, rubbing her face with her hands. You knew it was dangerous, you knew it could backfire but…

“ What about me?”

“ You? What you?”

“ Do you want me to… ?”

Alice stared at you before laughing so hard she was crying. Or was she crying so hard that she was laughing ?You waited for her to calm down before staring at her.

“ Are you serious ?”

“ Seems like she is.”

You both turned around to find Alastor, standing in front of you, the door open.

“ My dear, we don’t talk about taking trash out at the entrance, I taught you better than that.” he smiled widely at you. Alice was looking at you then at Alastor, seeming confused. You sighed before helping your friend standing up. “ Is there a place we could talk about getting rid of the trash?” asked Alastor with a beaming grin.

Alice seemed to come back to herself, and she tugged you to her father’s office. She locked the door behind Alastor, staring at you.

“ Explanation ?”

“ Nothing too serious. You’ve been caught in a big scoop Alice, and you need us to clean the mess you’ve made!” you paled, asking Alastor how did he know, did the bastard already told everyone? “ Oh dear, no, but from Alice’s expression, the only things that could make her so upset would be you or her lovely Alyzée. I took a lucky guess.”

“ Alastor, you are… your father… oh… that explains so much.” Alice let herself drop on her father’s chair. “ So, that’s why you didn’t want me to help to look for his father, because he killed him?” asked Alice, looking at you, confused.

“ We killed him.”

“ Of course you did.” she sighed, putting her head on the desk. “ I need.. a fucking glass of whiskey, I’m not having this conversation sober.” She took a bottle from the cabinet before sitting back in front of you. She poured herself after giving you and Alastor a glass. “ So, let me get this through, you both killed Alastor’s father and now you want to kill the man who knows I’m in love with Alyzée?”

“ Well, Alice, for once you made your brain work. I would almost be shedding a tear if I cared.” said Alastor as he sipped his drink. “ And furthermore, this man is a pig that needs to be slaughtered.”

You felt relaxed. You didn’t know why, but the fact that Alastor was referring to the man as a pig made you feel even less remorse than you could have felt.

“ What are you winning from this?”

“ Nothing–”

“ Doll, I know you don’t want to manipulate me. I know. I’m talking about your murderous husband. He wouldn’t help me freely.”

“ Using your brain for the second time? What a day folks ! It’s simple really, you are at the head of one of the richest families in Louisiana. Having you on my side is a plus.”

“ I’m already at your side–!”

“ No Alice, you could be cutting yourself to prove your faith and I would still doubt you. But a crime, that is a win-win situation. The pig is slaughtered, you are free, my darling and myself are doing what we need and everything is back to normal!” exclaimed Alastor with his usual smile.

“ … Fine.”

As Alice and Alastor were talking about the contract, you felt shivers down your spine. You closed your eyes, trying to comprehend what was happening. You don’t know why but you remembered Legba’s words. You need to trust your instincts. You couldn’t hear Alice and Alastor anymore, you could hear footsteps… You could hear…a shovel digging into the ground.

“ Darling?”

You gasped as you felt Alastor hand on your shoulder. What just happened ? They both were looking at you, worried.

“ I’m okay.. I just.. I’m okay.” you nodded, feeling extremely tired all of the sudden. “ Alastor… Where is your father's corpse?”

“ Six feet underground.”

“ I think.. I think we should check it out.”

“ Why dig up dirt from the past?”

“ Because I think someone is trying to dig him up.”

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doc-pickles · 1 year ago

Text

waking up in vegas | matthew tkachuk x hughes!sister (pt.5)

series masterlist

summary: your families come to visit you and matthew in florida for christmas

warnings: none I think???

a/n: this is the definition of a filler chapter. it’s here solely so I can post my next chapter this weekend. enjoy!

xoxo

nina

“Y’know moving a week before Christmas wasn’t really my best idea,” you groan as you shuffle through your closet for what feels like the tenth time. “I can’t find what I’m looking for and at this point I’m not sure it even exists.”

It's two days before Christmas and Matthew’s family is in town to celebrate the holiday with the two of you. Your parents and Quinn are also coming, your other brothers stuck in New Jersey with a game to play tonight.

“What’re you looking for?”, Matthew calls from the hallway and you groan from inside your closet.

“A green and white sweater that doesn’t make me look like I ate a bowling ball for lunch,” you sigh as you flip through the racks of your closet. “God damn it!”

“Is it striped?”, Matthew asks.

“Yes! Did you see it?”

Matthew walks into your room with the aforementioned sweater in hand but freezes. It’s then that you realize you’re only wearing leggings and a sports bra, your now very obvious cleavage and baby bump on full display.

“Let me-“

“I’ll just-“

You reach out for the sweater just as he steps forward, your bodies bumping against each other. Matthew’s hand darts out to wrap around your waist, steadying you and unintentionally bringing you closer to him. Your eyes meet and the heat burning between you two is so tangible you can feel its flames licking your cheeks.

“Matty,” you whisper as one of his hands moves up to brush against your cheek. You lean into it,

the soft touch from his calloused hands stoking the fire burning in you. “You feel so-“

“Matthew! We’re here!”

Chantal’s voice douses the fire threatening to consume both of you. You take a step away from Matthew, taking the sweater from his hands and slipping it on quickly, “I just need a few minutes to get ready.”

Matthew nods, still staring at you. He shakes his head and walks out into the living room to greet his parents and siblings. As soon as your bedroom door closes you release a breath you didn’t know you were holding. You work on grounding yourself for a few minutes before heading into the living room, immediately hearing Chantal and Taryn shrieking.

“Look at you!” Chantal gasps as she takes in your small baby bump, hands moving to the swell. “Oh you’re practically glowing, sweet girl. Your mama is gonna die when she sees you!”

You blush under Chantal’s compliments, meeting Matthew’s eyes over her shoulder. His eyes are glued to you, a dopey smile on his face as he meets your eyes. His stare confirms one thing for you; the fire between you two is still burning bright.

Your parents and Quinn arrive and your mother spends the first 20 minutes fawning over you. Brady and Quinn get into an argument about fantasy hockey while Taryn and Emma watch them with amused smiles and rolling eyes. Matthew sticks close to your side, not letting you get much further than a few feet away before he’s right next to you again.

Dinner is easy, something you’d worried about for a few days. But the way Quinn and Matthew chirp lovingly at each other across the table puts you at ease.

After dinner is finished and the boys have done the dishes you all settle into the living room to watch the Devil's game. You find yourself squeezed in next to Matthew on the couch, his arm casually swung over your shoulder as you lean into him.

“Let’s see if Jack can score me a few points in fantasy,” Brady says, leaving him, Quinn, and Matthew to begin a conversation about their league.

As you all watch the game, a strange feeling makes its way across your stomach. Your brow furrows for only a moment before a dull pain jabs you in the side and you let out a groan.

“You okay?” Matthew whispers, trying not to draw attention to the two of you as he looks you over with concern.

“I’m fine just feels-,” you’re cut off when another jab comes from the same spot. A third jab is right behind it and your eyes widen in realization. “Oh my god.”

Before he can ask more questions you grab Matthew’s hand and place it on your bump. You wait for a moment before there’s a small kick against his hand. A grin forms on his face as Matthew lets out a loud laugh, attracting everyone’s attention.

“The baby just kicked for the first time,” you explain with a smile, laughing as nearly everyone runs over to place their hands on your belly. The baby, however, decides that they don’t like the attention and instantly stops.

When everyone returns to their seats you lean into Matthew, his arm curling around your shoulder as his lips brush your forehead. His hand remains on your bump the rest of the game, both of you staying curled up with each other.

After the Devils secure their win you all share dessert before your families are excusing themselves. Your parents are flying to Jersey tonight to see Luke and Jack while Quinn is heading back to Vancouver. The Tkachuks are heading to St. Louis in the morning, leaving you and Matthew to celebrate Christmas on your own before he leaves for an extended road trip the next day.

“Dinner was delicious, you did a great job,” Matthew’s voice is soft as he comes up behind you in the kitchen, boxing you in where you’re grabbing a mug from the cabinets. “Thank you.”

You turn in his hold, smiling up at him. You two are close, only a few inches separating your faces as you stare at each other, “You’re welcome, it was fun and I’m glad everyone could come down.”

Matthew’s breath fanned across your face, his fingers coming up to brush your cheek just like he had earlier. Your eyes fluttered closed, relishing the feeling.

“You look beautiful,” he whispers. “So pretty, especially carrying my baby. You’re glowing.”

The words have an instant effect on you, a sigh leaving your lips in contentment. You know your panties are damp without having to check, your second trimester hormones having your body on edge all the time.

“Matty…,” you whisper, eyes fluttering open as you meet his dark gaze. You’re both so close to breaking the tension between you and letting the fire burn. But there’s hesitation still and you know Matthew can see it in your eyes.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” he whispers as his lips brush your forehead softly. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” you murmur as you watch Matthew disappear down the hall. When you hear his door click shut your head falls back against the cabinet and you let out a loud sigh. “Well… fuck…”

#matthew tkachuk #matthew tkachuk fanfic #matthew tkachuk fic #matthew tkachuk imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine #hockey fic #hockey imagine #nina writes

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humbledragon669 · 1 month ago

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S2E2 - The Clue Write Up P3 - London (Present Day) the Dirty Donkey meeting up to Land of Uz (Crowley speaks to Job)

Alright, so it’s been a minute. As I write this, it’s been two weeks since I posted the last of this episode’s write up instalments. My apologies about that, I’ve been pretty nose to the grindstone trying to get a Uni assignment finished so that I could enjoy a few weeks of socialising in the lead up to Christmas without worrying about getting it done in time. I finished this afternoon, a little over two weeks ahead of the submission date, which I am over the moon with. Honestly, it’s been pretty intense. I’m not ashamed to say that the first thing I did after I hit the “Submit” button was open up all the bits and pieces I use to write these posts, and I am definitely not ashamed to say that I was quite emotional as I did it. I’ve missed these goofballs. Like… a LOT. And I’ve missed engaging with the fandom with anything more involved than doomscrolling. I still have some reading for the trimester to catch up on, but I am largely free of Uni work now until mid-January (did someone say filming will be underway by then? Not me…) and I intend to throw myself into this beautiful little community wholeheartedly whilst I can. Who knows I might even manage to some more fic writing done/completed… So. With that self-indulgent waffley intro to this post out of the way, let’s get started, we have a pub to get to.

I didn’t think there was any point in delaying the inevitable, we all know that this is the moment that everybody wants to squeal about in this scene. There are a couple of bits and pieces (and they’re all pretty small) I just wanted to point out before I talk about it proper, and even then I probably won’t talk about it all that much because it’s been covered by just about everyone already. Firstly, I just wanted to give a little nod to the sound editors (who knew the first thing I would be pointing out after a short hiatus would be a sound thing. Oh that’s right, everyone did) for the donkey braying noise we can hear in the lower layers of the soundtrack when the camera focusses in on the pub sign. I don’t know why it’s there (I think we all know what a donkey is when we see one), but I think it makes it sounds like the sign is roaring. I don’t think it’s important, I just appreciate the effort.

Next up I want to say how much I wish there was an alleyway of space that leads directly from the door of a pub to a table in every busy pub I went to. There will be a bit more to talk about in regards to our hero couple having an “aura” of free space around them in a little while, but here I think it’s probably there for logistics more than anything.

Last up, I can’t help but feel like there’s something to be had in this little exchange:

CROWLEY: Ah, we’re going to the pub. You never go to the pub. AZIRAPHALE: We’re in the pub now. CROWLEY: What’s wrong with the coffee shop?

So, we hear Crowley moving from the collective “we” to the singular “you” in the first line, followed by Aziraphale immediately reverting to the collection “we” (which is in and of itself notable - I think it points to his not being able to think of himself as a “singular” where Crowley is involved). I actually wonder if this might be a reference to 1967 - we know that Crowley uses this same pub to conduct a covert meeting. Did he choose a pub knowing full well that Aziraphale doesn’t frequent them, supposedly safe in the knowledge that he could remain in the angel’s vicinity without the risk of bumping into him? I think it’s likely this would have factored into Crowley’s choice of meeting place, but what I find curious about the delivery of these lines in the present day is that he firstly sounds amused about this turn of events and then immediately asks Aziraphale why they can’t just do what they normally do. Don’t get me wrong, I love this little exchange, partly because we get to see a little of that mischievous Crowley that I mentioned is a little lacking in this season (at least in the present day scenes), I just can’t quite fathom Crowley’s thinking processes at this point.

Alright. Here we are at last.

I’m going to try and make this short and to the point. Three things about this:

Crowley does not respond to this touch at all. It’s quite rare for us to see this pair consciously touch one another, so if this was out of the ordinary for them, you’d expect to see some sort of shock from him but that is most definitely absent.

Aziraphale doesn’t just stop at putting a hand on Crowley chest, he actually strokes it a little, in a downward motion, and that’s not a response to any movement from the demon, who is completely stationary. That little downward stroke is all sub-conscious Aziraphale (or totally conscious and mischievous Michael, as we came to find out).

There is a little flash of shock on Aziraphale’s face in the split second after he strokes Crowley’s chest. I think this is him realising what he’s just done. Distracted as he was trying to find a table, he’s revealed the true nature of their relationship in a room full of people.

There. That’s it. That wasn’t too drawn out now, was it? Well, if that was a little too shallow for your tastes, shall we have a look at the miracle noise we’re about to hear?

OK, so this is very familiar territory for us by now, and just to prove that point, let’s compare this noise with the one from episode one:

Almost exactly the same, I think. Perhaps some slight difference with the levels, but that could just be the recording I’ve produced. As a reminder, I’ve started playing around with the idea that the miracle noises are more to do with need than the person who casts them - see this take from the episode one write-up:

This would stand up for the scene in the pub too, seeing as the miracle has been cast out of a “need” for somewhere to sit (and for that “aura” of space I mentioned earlier, this time around the table), rather than to achieve something with a moral aim. On the other hand, if you’re still of the camp that believes that the sound is tied to the caster, this would almost certainly drive the hammer home for my theory that Crowley didn’t do anything for the miracle in the book shop - these two miracle sounds are exactly the same, and the one in the pub is definitely only cast by Aziraphale. On a non-sound related note, it has not escaped my attention that the angel is incredibly nonchalant about performing a miracle here, despite how cautious he has been in previous scenes about doing “a very minor miracle”. How does one go from not wanting to perform half a miracle to hide someone in need to openly performing a full one just to guarantee yourself a seat? I suppose it’s possible that he thinks he has little left to lose now that he has Heaven’s attention, but that doesn’t sit right with me. Perhaps this is just another one of those instances, like with Aziraphale’s comments about the arrival of the Heavenly hosts, where the writing is perhaps a little thin in order to provide convenience for filming.

There’s a little Easter egg here in the headline on the newspaper (there will be another one shortly):

It’s not easy to make out the top bit, it looks to me like it reads “Modern, efficient, healthy and pleasant living accommodation in Milton Keynes”. To those of you who don’t know about Milton Keynes, it’s a town that was deliberately developed from scratch in the 60s to try and help address the housing shortage in the UK. It’s one of a handful of so-called “new towns” in the UK. Its most notable feature is that it has a lot of roundabouts. It’s also the one place that neither Crowley nor Aziraphale would take responsibility for, according to the book:

Crowley had been allowed to develop Manchester, while Aziraphale had a free hand in the whole of Shropshire. Crowley took Glasgow, Aziraphale had Edinburgh (neither claimed any responsibility for Milton Keynes*

The footnote for the town in the book also provides us with the text for the headline:

It was built to be modern, efficient, healthy, and, all in all, a pleasant place to live.

Lovely little Easter egg that one. Here’s the other:

This one comes from the book too, this time as part of Newt’s dialogue:

Daily Mail. ‘Letter from America.’ Um, August the third,” said Newt. “Just after the story about the woman in Worms, Nebraska, who taught her duck to play the accordion.

You really have to hand it to the prop and design team - they know how to sneak in those cheeky treats into newspaper headlines, don’t they?!

Alright, let’s jump into another oft-discussed moment.

As with so many of the moments in this show that are highly treasured and talked about by the community, I’m not going to talk about this a great deal, I just want to touch briefly on the vibe I get from this little moment. The bottom line for me here is that this is another Crowley rescue going on. I’ve talked about this aspect of their relationship quite a lot already I know, it’s just that I think it becomes so desperately important later, to the point that it’s explicitly stated. But I’m jumping ahead of myself. Breaking this rescue down, we can see how quickly Crowley becomes aware that his angel might need rescuing - when he looks over at the table to observe the odd man that just sat down. We also see how quickly Aziraphale is to signal to the demon that a rescue is required - with his look back to Crowley at the bar. This little moment is so beautiful to me - it shows how completely aware they both are of the other’s presence and role without a single word. And that position Crowley takes up when he does get to the table? It’s so very territorial, isn’t it? Reaching across Aziraphale to put the glass down, rather than just placing the glass down. It’s like a proverbial shield. And that you really can’t pretend not to hear the “what the fuck are you doing in my seat” in that “hello”, can you?

There are two additional minor points I want to point out here. The first is to do with one of Aziraphale’s tells - his hands.

You can see that as soon as he starts to feel seriously uncomfortable, he starts fiddling with his hands. We’ve seen him do this on multiple occasions before, so it shouldn’t be news that this is something he does subconsciously, I just think it’s worth noting that this behaviour comes into play even with situations where the risk of peril is low. The other thing of note is this tiny lip and eye movements we see when he takes a sip of his sherry:

The lip movement is tricky to read and interpret. I have seen a post that suggested this is a bit of non-verbal communication from him to Crowley, where he says “thank you”. I don’t think this is an unreasonable suggestion, and certainly plays to the non-verbal theme that runs through this entire season. It would also tie in nicely with the eye flick we can see, which makes it seem like the words are being projected at Crowley with his eyes. What’s important is that this gratitude isn’t for the drink (otherwise it would be spoken aloud) - this thanks would appear to be for the rescue.

There’s something about this line I really love, almost like he thinks he’s speaking from a wealth of experience. Which he blatantly isn’t, but you gotta love him for trying claim some knowledge in the area. Crowley looks as convinced of that as the rest of us though:

I also love this little insight into Aziraphale’s character:

AZIRAPHALE: I told them I made Nina and Maggie fall in love. CROWLEY: Why? AZIRAPHALE: It was the first thing I could think of.

To me it shows that ultimately he’s always instinctively drawn towards love. When you compare that mindset to the one shown by Gabriel earlier on in the episode when talking about Job’s children, it really shows how wide the gulf between Aziraphale and the rest of Heaven actually is. Here’s a little script thing I do have an issue with though:

AZIRAPHALE: Oh, miracles don’t work like that.

Um. OK. So why would you have gotten away with telling the rest of the Heavenly host that your miracle worked? This feels like another moment of flaky writing, it just doesn’t really hold up to any sort of scrutiny. But as quickly as I have a moment of doubt about this show, a little moment comes in to bring me back in line:

There’s something so showy about this. Like he’s giving Crowley the gift of “we”. There’s such emphasis on the “we”, with a set-up and a pause. This is interesting to me, because it almost sounds as if the suggestion here isn’t that they “fix” a problem, but that they rescue it, except this time it won’t be Crowley doing the rescuing on his own, this time it’s a “we” thing. Really cute.

There’s another fandom favourite coming - the fall-in-love-in-a-rainstorm speech. As usual, I won’t go into huge detail here, just highlight some of my favourite aspects. It goes without saying that the scene described is essentially an exact description of the events of the wall scene from the Garden of Eden, and what makes that particularly interesting is that it suggests (or perhaps confirms) that this was the moment that Crowley fell in love with Aziraphale. More than that, it suggests that he believes that the same can be said of Aziraphale. I am not unaware of the similarities of the description with the Before the Beginning scene, but if we’re talking actual watery rain, there is only one scene of the two that we can apply it to. The layers of subtext in this micro-scene are what really engage me, because not only do I love that Crowley’s speech says that he truly believes the way he fell in love to be the only and best way it’s possible to fall in love (and can we say “made for each other”? Swoon), the way that it’s delivered suggests he’s completely unaware he’s talking about himself. And it definitely hasn’t registered with Aziraphale either:

I also love how Crowley stands his ground on this one.

And just when you think this demon couldn’t get any more saccharine, he pulls this out of the bag:

There’s a tiny hesitation before the “Richard Curtis” that tells me everything I need to know about his little speech - this is the moment where he realises what he’s just said. Whether this is a realisation for him about exactly when he fell in love with Aziraphale I don’t know, largely because his eyes are covered and we don’t get to see his face for long enough, but I find something really charming in this idea. I’m sure there are some that would say that hesitation is because he’s about to give away the fact that he watches Richard Curtis films (Notting Hill is hardly demon-worthy content now, is it?), but I am not one of those. As a point of note, has Crowley’s description ever actually happened in a Richard Curtis film? Personally I haven’t watched an awful lot of his work, but I’m pretty sure it hasn’t happened in any of the stuff I have seen.

Final note on Crowley’s side of this discussion goes to this expression, the response to Aziraphale telling him that they should “invoke fiction … properly”:

I mean, he’s pissed at this point isn’t he? And rightly so I say. He’s just recounted his incredibly romantic tale of how he fell in love, and he’s told, by the recipient of that love, that he hasn’t done it “properly”. I think it’s fair to say that the non-verbal communication that was working so effectively earlier in this scene has well and truly gone off the rails by this point.

Quick side note about this 1810 Clerkenwell diamond robbery - not a real historic thing by all accounts. I find this interesting because so many of the historic things referred to in this show were actual events, or at least loosely related to one. This one seems to have been entirely created though. What I will say is that, from Crowley’s description and the way he says her name, it seems he may have been on a first name basis with her. Now wouldn’t that whole thing make for a fascinating spin-off/minisode?

I love the complete opposites we see in Aziraphale’s description of the perfect way to fall in love, the most obvious being that we haven’t ever seen this particular scenario play out between them in the way that we say Crowley’s. Perhaps this is meant to reinforce the difference in the types of personalities between them - the angel being the fantasist, the angel being the realist (which in of itself would open up a huge can of worms for discussion). At the heart of his speech is the only common aspect between the two descriptions:

AZIRAPHALE: …and then realise they had misunderstood each other and were actually deeply in love.

Essentially the two descriptions boil down to the same thing - two people coming together and, based on apropos of nothing but being in close physical contact with one another, fall deeply and desperately in love. How ironic that Crowley feels the same way about the Austen-scenario as Aziraphale did about the “Richard Curtis” one:

Right, I think that just about covers the pub scene, let’s see if I can get to the start of another flashback scene without too much trouble.

Tiny thing, but does anybody else find the idea that Crowley has never heard “Everyday” before highly unlikely? With his broad music tastes and the fact that he would actually have been around to hear the song when it was released, this seems like a really strange thing to claim, even if it sounds convincing. Maybe it’s just a me thing.

Next tiny thing (aside from noting that, despite the fact that Aziraphale is hiding a much sought-after archangel inside the shop, the door isn’t locked) - how is it that Crowley knows exactly where to find the Jane Austen books? Maybe that particular bookshelf is the start of an A-Z of fiction by author (I highly doubt this, as it would mean customers can actually find books they’re looking for). Even if that was the case, it would mean that Crowley has paid enough attention to the system at hand to know where to look. Given he himself claimed he doesn’t read books (see season one, episode two), there’s something about his familiarity with the shop layout that says more about the amount of time he spends there (and helps out there?) to me. What I do find interesting here is that he doesn’t instantly remove his glasses when he enters the shop. This might just be a set-up for their removal in just a moment, but it may also be that he’s less comfortable there now that Gabriel has set up camp. Talking of the removal of the glasses, there’s another one of those hiss noises here, just to really hammer home how threatening he wants to be to Jim. Lovely bit of subtextual sound editing.

Alright final point here - I’m sure there’s something to be said about Jim’s eyes turning purple when he remembers things. Maybe it’s just a special effect to show the audience that this is a genuine moment of remembering, but if not, it raises questions for me around what the purple eyes signify, which is emphasised by the fact that the words Jim recalls were not only not spoken by him, but he wasn’t even present to hear (at least as far as what we see can testify to). Some things to ponder on there for a later time perhaps.

I think it’s time to call it a day on this part. It’s run a little longer than intended, but that’s what happens with Aziracrow-rich content I’m afraid (so… all of season 2 then?). As always, questions, comments, discussion: always welcome! See you for the next one 😊

#good omens #episode analysis #good omens season 2 #aziracrow #ineffable idiots #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #head canon #crowley loves aziraphale #aziraphale loves crowley #good omens soundtrack

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pparacxosm · 3 months ago

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(prayer circle) pparacxosm patrick zweig smut pparacxosm patrick zweig smut pparacxosm patrick zweig smut pparacxosm patrick zweig smut ........

i was originally gonna come under this ask and trauma dump about my personal life being in biblical disarray and being a total failure and cherishing this blog and this fandom deep in my flesh and being scared that everyone was gonna move on or get tired of reading my stupid long convoluted fics and reject me like an organ of the wrong blood type,,,

but then i remembered we are on god’s green and delicate and finite earth and i’m having a good time on here with you guys right now and i’ll just keep doing that for as long as i am able SO

to answer the ask, i know ur referring to the post i made where i said i was writing something with smut but that was actually about my art fic so sorry to disappoint howeverrrr ;;

a blue eyed son part 3 (which is still in the cards) would contain smut and probably wouldn’t be tooooo long so i feel like that’s what i should put out next

i say that in that way because i’ve written another patrick fic that is very veryyy long and a little weird/meandering/character study-ish and that also contains quite a bit of smut (and takes place during christmas for some reason)

but i actually wanna hear from the congregation on this one

what do we wanna see next 🤔:

a) blue eyed son pt3 which would just be pat and reader skirting around each other’s lives some more as they do (and maybe they can work things out?? lol maybe)

b) stream of green pt2 which would just be the development of reader and tashi’s relationship post-injury

c) maybe maybeeee a dearly beloved pt2 (because i’m compelled by this reblog by @grimsonandclover) which would probably, by design, need to contain some very pathetic breed-kink-y smut

d) a tashi roommate fic which i actually have no info on, i’m just very enchanted by and can’t stop thinking about this moodboard by @diyasgarden

e) an art donaldson fic?? which idk i don’t have an idea for that but i figure i’ll give you all the opportunity to ask for one

f) or the patrick fic i was talking about, which is basically done but i’ll remind you is very long and also here’s a little excerpt as a sneaky peeky and also a taste of the plot:

vague? perhaps. but you let me know

#pparacxosm lore #pparacxosm trauma dump #except not anymore #now it’s a fun board meeting #you guys will really need to hear me out with the patrick fic but it has legs i swear

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you-can-be-what-you-want-to-be · 1 year ago

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People aren't mad because John/Arthur aren't canon, people are mad because the creator made fun of the fans that ship them in the Christmas special

I see… the post has been deleted

I’m just very used to being in bad fandoms where something as small as “I don’t ship them personally” is taken as a homophobic statement, and people have been saying forever if it’s not canon it’ll be queer bait, so I assumed which I maybe shouldn’t have done but with it coinciding with the “John is a child episode” it just made sense

now, I do have to say though, that while I don’t know a whole lot because I’m not on the Patreon, I was for awhile. Again take this with a HEAPING load of salt for that reason since I clearly don’t know the specific situation. Everything I’m going to say I will try to say from an objective viewpoint since I don’t know the situation and will only focus on the facts I do know.

But how is this new? For the karaoke creep special they keep calling it weird to call each other romantic terms. And when Arthur died by not sacrificing the little guy last season Harlan was ROUGH. He said anyone who voted to not sacrifice were children smashing dolls together, that they forgot the story they were in and hopefully this punishment would remind them that actions have consequences. He basically said this is your fault for being stupid. He ended up having to post a semi apology saying it’s eldritch horror story, it’s supposed to be about harshness and not knowing the consequences before hand, and that he teases his audience and that if they don’t like that this isn’t the right show for them. His phobia play through he did a bit as Arthur and John where he was like “and we are NOT doing anything in the shower no matter what the fan fictions say” “let them dream John”

I also would like to mention that word of god should be ignored in these stories and that Harlan does NOT have a PR team. Again I don’t know the situation. I don’t know if he was ad libing live, in which case he should be given more Lee way as self editing in the moment is hard, I don’t know how if he said the most vile stuff alive, or if he said something a little mean but harmless like the “no we are not doing this” “let them dream” or what. Maybe it is bad and he deserves to be roasted, idk.But making jokes about a non canon thing can be a normal thing, especially if it’s a thing people keep bugging you about.

I do know that fandom as a whole has a problem attacking people over though, being someone who frequently got called homophobic for headcanoning single characters as aro, this one specifically has already harassed him about this ship which I’m sure gets annoying, and that he has explicitly said he will poke fun on the Patreon, and that he has said Jarthur won’t happen, and that he is one guy without the means to sort through hate mail removed from situations and doesn’t have a PR team to tell him “hey this off the cuff joke is a bad idea”

all that being said, again I do not know what he said specifically. I think either way a lot of people need to reassess if this is the fandom for them. I’ve seen a lot of people only get into the show for shipping and then get mad when there’s eldritch horror and the attitudes of eldritch horror in the eldritch horror podcast. If he said something that bad then maybe consider getting out since he writes about delicate subjects and it will only get worse. If what he said wasn’t that bad and people are getting mad about being lightly teased but it wasn’t confrontational or homophobic, they might want to leave because that’s just what Harlan does, tease people, and it’s not new and will continue, especially about non canon stuff in his own work. And if you got into and are only staying for the shipping…. Yeah. If that’s the only thing you want maybe it’s time to move on.

and if you decide to stay, know that. Know and be warned ahead of time that you will be teased so it isn’t a surprise next time

edit: so I did get the full context quote and it’s literally just “we want to hang out together alone for Christmas” “platonically, as in canon” “oh of course of course.” This. This isn’t bullying. It’s a little tongue in cheek sure but the whole thing is just saying it isn’t canon. I’ve heard complaints on comments on this post about other stuff he’s done, which I don’t know much about but is also applicable. I did my best to say “either way, this is stuff related.” As someone who writes and has written things before where every single chapter people kept pushing for something I wasn’t going to write I get it. I’m not saying anything he might have done is right but I think it’s understandable at the very least, for a writer to be upset about his stuff being constantly misinterpreted and having fans try to push it where he doesn’t want it.

him reminding people it won’t happen is fine, especially when people keep accusing him of queer baiting. I still think what I said earlier stands even hearing other opinions, because although I can’t say either way, it seems like everyone who is upset says this is a repeated behavior, and if you stay you can’t be surprised by it every time. If it’s going to bug you you have to either be prepared for it to keep happening or leave.

That isn’t to say no one can be upset about anything else but this specific thing I don’t think is worthy of that. All he did was jokingly repeat canon in character (which is much better than like. Someone who keeps hinting at something and never giving it) in a teasing manner. He didn’t say anything negative about shippers, or anything homophobic, just said “hey remember kids, we aren’t into each other like that.” Which is. Fine. It’s annoying but it isn’t malicious.

If the issue is mods or his interactions with people say that. Don’t make it about him light heartedly going “don’t accuse me of queerbaiting.” it makes it so when actual issues like what people are talking about in the comments (if they’re legit, again I try to stay only in the actual content part and abstain from knowing about creators) come up no one takes them seriously because so many molehills were mountained.

If you’re pissed about how he talks to his fans say that, don’t make it about a lack of queer rep when he said day one there wouldn’t be any. Make it about the issue itself. You don’t mention that someone’s a domestic abuser for example after you say “and they have NO CHEESE in their house thats MONSTROUS who does that.” If you want to be taken seriously about a problem you focus on the thing that matters which is. Hurting people.

I guess at the end of the day I’m no one’s boss, but I am tired of not knowing what to believe or not when someone saying something like “no comment” on if characters they wrote are together is homophobia, or a character who’s been Described as a dick acting like one and then the creator gets accused of being shitty (random examples not to do with this specific fandom). If everything is a big deal that makes someone the worst when the subject is not actually hurting anyone… it’s exhausting. Idk anything about Harlan. At the end of the day I’m here for my little horror stories. But I will say definitively that I don’t think it’s bullying to say a ship is not canon and that to act like it is makes it impossible for people who actually care about morals and what someone is doing to keep the energy to stay that way without becoming part of a mob just taking people at their word.

If it upset you I’m sorry, it’s always disappointing when our take on media is dismissed, especially by the creator. And it’s fine to be disappointed. I get that. But don’t blow it out of proportion, and don’t make it about something it isn’t. If you’re upset about the quote say that it’s disappointing without saying it’s punching down. The author is dead and it’s one of the biggest podcast ships out there. If you’re upset about anything else make a post about that issue without tying it to this fun bonus non canon episode. You are allowed to be upset just and if it is about shipping: stop making someone disagreeing with you about a ship a big controversy. You can ship whatever you want regardless of canon and no one is trying to stop jarthur shippers, and if it isn’t about that stop making things about shipping if that’s not what it’s actually about.

#Discourse #malevolent #Masked

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canirove · 5 months ago

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Rice, Rice, baby | Chapter 16

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Masterlist

“Liv, you seriously didn't have to buy them anything for Christmas.”

“I’m their favourite aunty, Kennedy. I had to get them something” I say while watching one of the twins try to eat the wrapping paper from one of the presents. “Besides, thinking about what to get them and then going shopping has been one of the most joyful things I've done lately. Who knew buying kids’ stuff could be therapeutic?” I chuckle.

“How are you?” Kennedy asks me. “Like, truly.”

“I have good days and bad days” I shrug. “But the good days have begun to overcome the bad ones.”

And that started just a couple of weeks after what happened between me and Declan in my car. Because what did he do? Make it Instagram official that he and the singer were dating. And what did I do? Have the biggest breakdown known to history.

When Alex showed me their joint post during our lunch break (kind of lame to announce it like that, but who am I to judge), I felt as if the hole in my chest had started to grow at lightning speed, swallowing me completely. I wanted to cry, to scream, to hit something. And I did all that at Tottenham's gym, where I ran to hide myself, and where Micky found me.

“Liv, what are you doing?”

“Looking for something I can hit!” I yell.

“Why?”

“Do you seriously have to ask why?” I laugh.

“Declan…”

“Yes. Him” I say, kicking a yoga mat and making the ones standing next to it fall.

“If you want to hit something, why don't you try this?” Micky says. “It's less harmful, gets the job done, and they won't fire you for destroying the gym.”

“What?” I say, turning around.

“This” he says, holding some boxing gloves. “It has helped me in the past and I think it can help you too.”

That first day all I did was cry and scream while he held the punching bag, letting all my anger go. But when I woke up the next day, my arms feeling so sore I could barely move them, I noticed that the hole was a tiny bit smaller. So I started to meet with Micky in the gym when we both were free, him teaching me how to properly box while I felt like every punch was closing the hole a bit more.

“I'm glad to hear that” Kennedy says. “But you aren't looking that good.”

“Uh?”

“We have matching bags under our eyes, Liv. And last time I checked, you didn't have three children that drove you crazy” she chuckles. “Are you sleeping well?”

“I mean… I'm sleeping a lot more than usual, even taking naps throughout the day. But I still feel tired, it's a weird feeling.”

“Not so weird. I felt like that when… Nah, it can't be.”

“What can't be?”

“I felt like that before I knew I was pregnant with Leo. But it doesn't make any sense because you haven't been with anyone since before the summer, have you?”

“Yeah, that doesn't make any sense” I reply, not really answering her question. “It probably is just stress from these days.”

Too much work, then the training with Micky after not working out for ages, the fact that I'm still emotionally healing, that I'm having to spend Christmas with Alex and his family when things keep being weird between us… That has to be it.

“You could always ask one of the team's doctors to run some tests if that makes you feel better.”

“Nah, there is no need. I'm fine” I smile. “Do you want me to help you with bath time and putting them to bed?”

“Yeah, sure. You take care of Leo, I'll take care of the twins” Kennedy says. But there is something in the way she's looking at me, that tells me that she won't forget so easily about the conversation we just had.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“Liv, wait” Madders says behind me.

“Hey” I reply, turning around. “Doctor Smith?”

“Hello” he smiles.

“Great, you know each other.”

“Of course we do, Madders. He works with my dad, remember?”

“Oh, yes. Silly me” he chuckles. “Anyway, he has something to tell you.”

“Me?”

“Your dad and James have mentioned that you've been going through a rough patch and they are worried it may have affected your physical health. That's why they've asked me if I could run some tests and make sure everything is fine.”

Kennedy. She told Madders, of course she did! This is what her look from yesterday meant!

“That's very kind of you, but there is no need.”

“C'mon, Liv. It'll be just a blood test and maybe a peepee one, right?”

“Peepee?” I laugh.

“You know that's how Leo says it and now I do it too without thinking” he shrugs. “But that'll be it, won't it, doctor?”

“Just the basics” he says.

“I'm fine, James. Maybe a bit stressed, but fine” I insist. “It'll pass after the holidays, you'll see.”

“But what if it doesn't?”

“Then I'll say yes to those tests.”

“Promise?”

“Yes, I promise” I sigh. “Now can I please go home? My mum wants me to help her clean around the house, we are hosting this year.”

“Ok, fine. But we have Doctor Smith as our witness. If after Christmas you are feeling like shit…”

“He can run those tests.”

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“You didn't have to wait with me, Madders.”

“What kind of older brother would I be if I left you alone?”

“The not annoying one?”

“Meh, meh, meh” he replies, sticking out his tongue.

I had had to do it. I had had to get the tests done. And why? Because during Christmas things hadn't improved.

I felt sick most mornings, and by dinner time I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. All I wanted to do was to lay down in my bed while watching period dramas and wish I got to dress like a princess. Oh, and speaking of periods… Mine was nowhere to be found. Which has only made the tiny voice that has been in my head since Kennedy told me she had felt this tired when she was pregnant, get louder and louder.

But me having all these symptoms could be just stress. I googled it and it matches. So it has to be that, not that Declan had better aim than all the strikers in the Premier League together after just one time not using any kind of protection.

“Isn't it taking them too long? He said he'll have the results by the end of the day.”

“Maybe they were busy with other stuff” Madders says, resting his hand on my leg and stopping it from moving like crazy.

“Or maybe there is something wrong with me.”

“Liv, no. Don't you dare going there.”

“Then why hasn't he called us yet? Why…”

“Oh, there you are” Doctor Smith says, opening the door of his office. “Sorry for making you wait, but the system went down and it took it a while to recover and allow us to log in.”

“See?” Madders whispers.

“Please come in, Olivia. You can wait here, James.”

“Can't he come with me?” I ask.

“I would prefer to talk with you in private” the doctor says. That's it. There is something wrong with me, I'm dying. Or worse. My suspicions are right. “But if it makes you feel more comfortable…”

“It does. Thank you” I say, holding Madders' arm as if my life depended on it. Which can very well be the case.

“Ok, so” Doctor Smith says once we are sitting down in his office. “All the tests came back perfect, but…”

“But?” I ask, grabbing Madders hand and squeezing it so hard I fear I may break it.

“Olivia… You are pregnant.”

#declan rice #declan rice fanfic #declan rice x reader #declan rice imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

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jerzwriter · 1 year ago

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The way I screamed when I saw this commission! The artwork is by the simply lovely, delightful & talented @rosefuckinggenius. If you have never commissioned her, you should! Rose, you're the absolute best, my dear! Thank you for bringing my babies to life this holiday season!

All is Merry & Bright

Book: Open Heart (Post Series) Pairing: Tobias Carrick x F!MC (Casey Carrick) Other Characters: Bryce Lahela, Vivian Carrick (F!OC), Jordan Carrick (M!OC) Words/Rating: 1,200 / Teen Summary: It's their second Christmas with little Samantha, and the Carricks are getting ready to take their Christmas card photo. As Uncle Jordan sets up the perfect shot, Grandma Vivian and Bryce provide the commentary. A/N: In my timeline, this would be taking place during the Christmas 2024 season.

With their coffee orders securely in hand, Tobias stepped into the vestibule of his townhome, careful to make sure ‘Hurricane Samantha’ wasn’t underfoot. A year ago, he and Casey wondered what it would be like when she began to walk and talk; now they knew it only added to the joyful chaos they had come to know and love. It was as familiar as the warm vanilla cinnamon scent that had filled the air ever since Casey moved in and as welcoming as his wife’s loving embrace or his daughter’s smile at the end of the day.

He smiled as he placed the snowflake bedecked cups on their dining room table. The last four years of his life bore no resemblance to the thirty-six that had preceded it, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

He was pulled from his thoughts when he heard his brother's desperate pleas from the next room. He was doing his best to keep Samantha occupied, but she was quicker than he thought, and the bowl of red, silver, and green-wrapped Hershey kisses was too tempting. As the toddler's tiny hand reached up to grab the bowl, Jordan started to unravel.

“No, Sammy! No! I know Mommy and Daddy don't want you on a sugar high while before taking your Christmas pictures!”

But Samantha was undeterred. “Yum-YUMS!” She yelled. The bowl was about to topple on her just as Tobias lifted her from behind, placing her high atop his shoulders in one swoop.

“Uncle Jordan’s right, pumpkin. Let’s save the sugaring up for after, OK?”

“Wow!” Jordan was astonished. “You said I was right!”

Tobias shot his brother a smirk. “Yeah, well, even a broken clock is right twice a day! Where is Casey, anyway.”

“Upstairs, finishing her makeup.”

“Still?”

“She was all done,” Jordan shrugged. “But then Ma had... opinions... so she's upstairs touching up.”

“Oh, shit!” Tobias laughed. “Then we’re safer down here with this little firecracker.”

“My thoughts exactly.”

But Casey and Vivian were descending the stairs at that very moment, and Mrs. Carrick was all happy to interrupt her sons.

“Hate to disappoint you, boys. But we smelled that delicious coffee the moment you came in. There’s no keeping us away.”

“Gam-mah!” Samanta squirmed excitedly, throwing her arms her grandmother's way, and that's how Vivian instantly forgot about her coffee.

“Oh, come here, my little angel!" She cooed, retrieving her from Tobias's arms. "That’s right! Tell Daddy that Grandma’s here. His services are no longer needed!”

“Really?” Tobias sneered. “Because with all your complaints of wanting another grandchild, I think my services are most certainly needed.”

Bryce dropped his coffee cup to the table with a thud. His eyes rose to the ceiling as he let out a sigh. “I don't know if putting up with you two is worth the free coffee.”

“Maybe not,” Tobias said, pointing to a few bags on the table. “But there are also cookies from Parziale’s, and I’m ordering in Chinese after the photo. Would that make it worthwhile?” Bryce may have answered if he weren't too rushing for the cookies.

Tobias let out a slow whistle as he walked toward Casey, making a show of looking her over as he did.

“No mistletoe needed here!" Casey laughed. "You can just kiss me."

Tobias studied Casey's face, then kissed her forehead. “Not bad! Not bad at all!”

“Jordan told Vivian he didn't like it,” Casey smiled. “He wanted something a little edgier. That a little punk edge four our family Christmas portrait would go a long way.”

“And I made it clear that my foot would go a long way...” Vivian interjected. “A long way up his ass if he thought I would allow that to happen.”

“ASS!” Samantha hollered, and everyone but Vivian broke into a fit of laughter.

“See what you make me do!” Vivian scolded as she whisked Sammy into the living room. “Making me say bad words in front of my grandbaby.”

“There is a swear jar in the kitchen," Bryce noted.

“Yeah," Casey added. "Between all of us, her college education will be funded before she turns two.”

“Amen to that,” Tobias laughed.

“All right, guys, as fun as this is, do you think we can start taking the pictures?” Jordan requested. “I do have a date tonight.”

“Oh, do you?” Casey teased.

“Yep,” Jordan grinned, playfully smacking his brother. “Someone’s gotta keep the Carrick rep going since this one has gone all domestic.”

“That’s not our rep!” Vivian shouted. “You’re not getting any younger either, Jordan! Who is this person? Do I know them?"

"I think I know him," Casey winked. "Make it quick; Vivian is itching to plan another wedding!"

“Oh! Trust!” Tobias laughed heartily. “Trust! She is!”

“All fun aside," Casey segued. " We should start the photos before it gets too close to Sammy’s naptime.”

“Yeah, we want to do it before my naptime, too,” Bryce added.

“You’re not in the photo,” Tobias reminded. “You can go nap now if you want."

“You know, I’m still insulted by that," Bryce complained. "Why am I not in the family photo?”

“Because you’re not their stepson, no matter how much you may act like it," Vivian advised. "Now, if you want a family portrait, I suggest you get mar...”

“Annnnd on that note, it's photo time!" Jordan grinned.

“Sammy, come here, baby,” Casey beamed as her giggling little toddler wobbled over to her. “Let Mommy fix your sweater so we are all pretty for our picture!”

“I’ll admit,” Vivian observed. “Those sweaters wouldn't have been my first pick, but they're definitely you two! They will make an adorable family Christmas card.”

Casey stopped what she was doing, exhaling as she snuggled under her husband’s arm. “Family Christmas card... our second already. Can you believe it?”

“Oh, do I hear disappointment there?” Tobias teased.

“Not even a little. But sometimes, I’m still astonished. How did we end up here?”

“Do I really have to explain how this came to be, Mrs. Carrick,” Tobias winked. "See, when a man and a woman fall in love, sometimes, they do this thing together...."

“OK, No!" Jordan insisted. “I don’t need to hear about how Sammy was conceived.”

“No, we don’t,” Vivian agreed. “But I do need you two to keep at it - in private! Because I sure would love a second grandbaby on next year’s card.”

“I think that’s her way of offering to babysit for us tonight,” Casey winked.

Tobias pulled his wife and Sammy closer. “Then, that's our queue! Come on, let's get this picture over with."

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

@choicesholidays It fits a few, but let's go with ... it's a tradition. .

Tagging the rest separately.

#choices fanfic #open heart #open heart choices #choices open heart #open heart fanfic #tobias carrick #bryce lahela #tobias carrick x f!mc #choices fanart #playchoices #playchoices fanfic #rosefuckinggenius #christmas #christmas fics #holiday fics

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henswilsons · 2 years ago

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lafd updates kissing booth scene 😙

hi hi hello !! i was fortunate enough to get featured on an episode of @dispatchpodcast with the simply wonderful @burnthatbridge and had a truly delightful time, cannot recommend enough. i mentioned i had a few deleted scenes from lafd updates 2 and said “hehe maybe i’ll upload them during christmas”, and then as soon as rachel and i hung up i immediately forgot i’d said that so did not in fact upload them on christmas. anyway so better late than never? hope u enjoy hehe

this is lafd updates 2.5: kissing booth. aka will mia ever stop milking this verse (probably not)

Eddie has served two terms in the army. He has fired guns; he has killed people. He left his wife and his newborn son to do a military tour in the Middle East; he has lost countless people on the job.

And yet, somehow, this is his lowest moment: standing behind a kissing booth, wearing an LAFD shirt two sizes too small and a $5 FOR A KISS! badge.

It makes sense, he thinks resignedly to himself as the next woman steps up the booth. This is probably just karmic retribution for all the terrible things he’s done in his life. He’d thought he’d paid it back, by moving himself and Christopher to a new state where they’ve both thrived, taking a job that focuses on saving people instead of milling them down, but apparently not. Just when he thinks the universe has finished taking its turn laughing at him, he falls through another new, impossibly worse trapdoor of shame.

He just didn’t realise this one would mean potentially contracting Covid or beard burn.

“Hello,” he says, anyway, because he’s nothing if not a diligent protector of state. Also Buck has promised him the mother of all blowjobs if he cracks eight hundred dollars. “What’s your name?”

The latest woman blinks at him, a little owlishly. “Um, Alice,” she says with a blush. “Hi, sorry, I just can’t believe it’s really you. You’re so handsome in person.”

“Ha, really,” Eddie says, as though ninety percent of the tax-paying public willing to spend their daily latte budget on a smooch haven’t said the exact same thing to him. He’s honestly starting to get a little offended on behalf of his station portrait; he didn’t think it was that bad. At least not the point where people are insultingly surprised by his apparent good looks. Maybe it’s the hair? “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Alice. I’m Eddie.”

“I know,” she says. “I’m a big fan.”

Eddie reiterates: he posted about traffic and sandstorms. “Well, let’s give you your money’s worth.”

Behind manning a kissing booth, probably one of the more mortifying experiences of Eddie’s life had been discussing the parameters of what constituted a five-dollar kiss with his coworkers and captain. It’s good to know that at least two of his top five most humiliating moments have been solidified within a day; economical, probably, even if it means he needs to go into hiding for at least a week. Chimney had begun the team brief with, “Okay, but do you use tongue?” which was how Eddie knew he was in for a long afternoon. Or, the big banner outside the station with MR LAFD UPDATES MAN KISSING BOOTH INSIDE!! had been an inkling, but he’d been mostly optimistic.

“Like French kissing?” Bobby said.

“No one calls it French kissing anymore, old man,” Buck said. “It’s making out.”

“I,” Eddie said, “am not making out with people. I’m going to get the kissing equivalent of rug burn.”

Chimney had looked concerned. “A peck isn’t worth five dollars.”

“I didn’t tell you to charge five dollars per kiss.”

“Uh, if we want to beat out Station 19 for biggest donation, we’re gonna have to pull out the big guns.” Chimney then gestured at him, as though Eddie was in danger of forgetting that the culmination of the rivalry between the 118 and their biggest rivals rested on his shoulders. And tongue, apparently. He’d been having stress dreams for weeks.

“Yeah, you’re probably gonna have to use tongue,” Ravi said, not sounding apologetic at all. “Everyone in my mentions is talking about it.”

Maybe today would also encapsulate the third worst moment of Eddie’s life. If he played his cards right he might be able to hit all five. “About my tongue?” he said, tiredly. Three months ago, he would have been dismayed. He’s older and wiser to the whims of Twitter now; he’s resigned to his fate.

“#LAFDKissingBooth is trending,” Ravi said. “You better mint up.”

Eddie sighed anyway. “I liked it better when you were riding the coattails of my fame.”

“Oh, I still am,” Ravi said, and flashed his phone screen. “I run an LAFD Updates Man Updates account where I mostly just report on everything you’re doing.”

Hen was pretending not to find this deeply hilarious. It was fine; Eddie was used to being betrayed at this point. “Why?”

“Because I’m at, like, sixty thousand followers,” Ravi said. “By the way, everyone sends their best wishes about your defeat in Mario Kart yesterday.”

Buck said, “Ha!” like this was tremendously funny. “Update-caption.”

“Don’t you have anything to say about this?” Eddie said. “We’re dating.”

“And you’re about to make us hundreds of dollars,” Buck said kindly. “If you kiss them the way you kiss me we could probably charge eight or nine dollars for a kiss.”

“Oh, gag,” said Hen, at the same time as Chimney perked a finger up and broached, “Now, that’s not a bad idea.” There had also been a talk about Covid protocols and the implications of a kissing booth in the metropolis of California, as well as an agreed-upon number of seconds a kiss should last (six seconds, which Eddie had fought tooth and nail down from fifteen, what the fuck, Chim) and a loose script Eddie would follow, because apparently money in a box and then a smooch was “unromantic”, or whatever. “It’s the Mr LAFD Updates Experience,” Chimney said, emphasising the words in a way that they probably all started with capital letters, like a board game or bad dating simulator. God, it’s only a matter of time. “We need to generate good press for our charity auction in Christmas so hopefully we can sell off a date with you for over a grand.”

“We could start a farm in the mountains,” Eddie said to Buck. “Raise goats.”

Buck, who was an asshole for still sniggering at him, but also the love of Eddie’s life, said indulgently, “Goats are cool. Do you think we could make our own cheese?”

Their hideaway in the mountains where Eddie does nothing but spend time with his son and boyfriend making cheese and babying goats has kind of been the thing keeping him going through the afternoon. Even now as he leans in to kiss Alice, counting to six in his head (and keeping his tongue in his mouth, thank you), he lets his mind wander a little: pictures Buck in overalls and nothing else, milking cows and chewing on wheat. Mm.

It's not until she pulls away that he realises to his mortification he’s sprung to half-chub. Quickly he quickly slides the donations box in front of him.

Alice wipes her mouth on the back of her hand, looking a little dazed. “Damn,” she says. “If I pay another twenty what will that get me?”

Eddie tries for a smile. “Probably several rounds at Whack-A-Mole and maybe one of my captain’s smash burgers.”

Alice leans forward across the booth. “Just a smash burger?”

Eddie coughs. “Um, well. And Whack-A-Mole.”

“Lady,” someone loudly says in the queue behind her. “You got your turn. Stop holding up the line.”

Alice scowls, but drops twenty dollars in the donations box anyway before disdainfully swanning away. Eddie is sort of pleasantly surprised by this; he busies himself smoothing the bill down, does a rough estimate in his head with the amount of people he’s kissed across the afternoon and reckons he’s probably very near his eight hundred dollar goal, then looks up for his next customer.

And smiles.

“Well, hey there, cowboy,” Buck says, which is a poorly timed choice of words considering the trestle table they’ve got set up is only just covering Eddie’s boner at the thought of Buck murmuring yeehaw into his ear as they slow-fuck against a haybale. “I heard you’re giving out kisses?”

Eddie raises an eyebrow. Goat-rearing fantasies aside, he hasn’t forgotten it was Buck’s big mouth that landed him here. “It’s gonna cost you, you know. Five dollars.”

Buck pouts. “I don’t get a boyfriend deal?”

“You’re right. Ten dollars.”

Buck barks out a laugh, but pulls out a ten-dollar bill anyway. “Deal,” he says, tucks it into the box that only yesterday he and Christopher had spent an hour decorating at the kitchen table as Eddie fried gorditas at the stove. He leans forward, bracing his weight on the table with both hands. “So?”

“Well, let me give you your money’s worth,” Eddie recites dutifully, and it’s worth it for the way Buck laughs when he closes the distance, tasting his smile. Kissing Buck is familiar; grounding in a way, amidst the probably hundreds of strangers he’s kissed today. Buck tastes of the candy corn he’s definitely been sneaking behind Hen’s back, of the protein shake he and Eddie had shared on the car ride in; Eddie counts six seconds, but keeps a hand around the lovely curve of Buck’s face, where he can fit his thumb against the pulse in his neck. Buck bites a little at his lower lip; Eddie is on second twelve of fuck it and opens his mouth enough that he can lick his way in, chase out the bubbling laughter.

Behind them, someone wolf whistles.

Abruptly, he pulls away. Buck is still leaning forward, looking kinda dopey, mouth curved in that indulgent little smile of his whenever Eddie fucks up flipping pancakes or holds his hand in public. “Wow,” he says.

Eddie wipes his mouth. “Come again.”

“Oh, I will,” Buck says, who is predictable as the day is long. “Best ten dollars I’ve ever spent.”

He’s such a piece of shit. There’s no one Eddie wants to escape to the mountains to more. “Go help Bobby with his burgers, slacker.”

“And after I’ve made such a generous donation.” Buck leans away, and Eddie catches a glimpse of the people in line behind him, all gaping. Half of them have their phones out. Eddie altruistically lets this be tomorrow-Eddie’s problem. “How much have you raised?”

“With this?” Eddie flaps the latest ten-dollar addition. “I think this makes it eight hundred dollars.”

Buck grins. “Well, how about that, hey.”

“How about that.” Buck still doesn’t move away. Eddie sighs, but it’s mostly (read: all) for show. “What, Buck?”

Quick as whip, before Eddie can blink, Buck leans back in again over the table and pecks him, soft and slow. “Love you,” he says, and then darts off, leaving Eddie blinking after him.

The next person in line looks impressed. “Damn,” they say. “If I pay you ten dollars will you kiss me like that?”

“Sorry, boyfriend toll,” he says, and they good-naturedly snap their fingers. “But hey, nice to meet you. What’s your name?”

#my fic #mr lafd updates man #im. so sorry LMAO

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kinzis-writing · 2 years ago

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Only Exception Pt. 4 | Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd

Summary: After almost two years of being together, Y/N had only met Bob’s family once. Turns out the next holiday her boyfriend had off was Christmas and it just so happens that he has an important question to ask the Mitchell girl and the girl has a surprise for him.

Warning(s): mentions of marriage, mentions of pregnancy, maybe a few cuss words, mentions of alcohol, spending time with in-laws (not really a warning but sometimes it should be.), Mentions of sexual activities, mentions of clingy ex.

Series Masterlist: Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four

*Not Edited!*

*Not my Gif! sorry if I wasn’t suppose to use it.* *Also I got the names of Bob’s family from another post I saw on Tumblr. I am not trying to copy and I would definitely give the person credit if I remembered their name!*

It had been almost two years since the mission that had Y/N on the highest dose of anxiety medication. Since then, Bob hadn’t been on too many suicide missions. That didn’t mean that he got any free time off work, but neither did Y/N. The Mitchell girl had worked at the base for six months and decided not to renew her contract with the navy. She had actually packed up and moved wherever Bob went. That is why she became a travel nurse; the pay was slightly better than a stationed nurse and she had a contract that allowed her to follow her boyfriend around whenever he had to be stationed all over the country.

“Good morning.” Y/N mumbled as she looked up and noticed Bob checking his phone. The couple knew that they had a flight to catch in order to make it home for Bob’s family’s Christmas.

“Good morning.” Bob replied sitting his phone down and turning his attention towards his girlfriend. “How’d you sleep?” he asked softly as his hand rubbed up and down y/n’s arm.

“Amazing.” She mumbled as she sat up slightly to lean over his body, the sheet going with her to keep her naked body hidden from the morning air. “I needed all of that last night.” she mumbled as she leaned closer to his lips. “The shared bath, the massage, the orgasms, just being with you.” she murmured before gently pressing her lips to her boyfriend’s.

“I’m glad I could help you relax.” He whispered once the two pulled out of their kiss. “We have to get ready if we’re going to make it to the airport on time.” he mumbled.

Y/N nodded before sitting up fully and getting out of bed. She grabbed her clothes that she laid out the previous night and headed towards the shared bathroom. She would never admit it, but she was nervous. It had been forever since she met his family, and she wasn’t sure if they liked her or not. Given, it was a short visit so his family didn’t really get to know her as in depth as they would have liked. This time the couple would be spending a full week with the Floyd family and that was why she was so anxious. She didn’t have to try to impress them the last time she saw them, now she had to make sure that she didn’t do anything to make his family hate her.

“Baby, we have to leave in ten minutes.” Bob called out from the bedroom. The man knew that it would be Y/N’s first time not spending Christmas with her father, she had expressed how she was fine with going to visit his family instead of the pair spending the holiday with Penny and Pete.

“I’m done.” Y/N spoke as she walked out of the bathroom. “so, for anxiety reasons, who all am I going to have to impress?”

Bob let out a small laugh before racking his brain for everyone that is going to be there for Christmas. “My mom and dad, obviously.” he stated as he was silently making a list. “My sister, My brother, My aunt and uncles, and My sister might let Elaine come.” Bob stated before walking over to his girlfriend and letting a small smile grace his face. “I just want to tell you before we get home, that Elaine and I have some history. It’s nothing serious... but she seems to keep holding on to what happened in high school before I joined the Navy. I gave my sister specific instructions to keep her away the first time you met them because you are important to me.”

Y/N nodded taking everything he said in, “So what’s different about now?” The Mitchell girl asked as she raised an eyebrow at her boyfriend.

“The difference is that I know for a fact that nothing can come between us now, I was still a bit insecure in our relationship back then.” He mumbled causing Y/N to smile bigger than she had during the whole conversation.

“Were you scared to lose me, LT. Floyd?” She teased before kissing his cheek and walking around him to pack her toothbrush that she had just used in the bathroom.

“Actually, I was.” He admitted before grabbing their bags and heading out to the vehicle.

The flight was not as long as Y/N expected, and they were in Bob’s hometown. The first time the girl had met his family, she was shocked to know that Bob was a bit country. His family lived on a ranch, and she thought it was beautiful. It seemed so peaceful and quiet, having all that land to do whatever you wanted with.

“I love this place,” Y/N spoke out as their rental car arrived at the ranch. There were already quite a few cars in the driveway of the house. “It seems so peaceful to be surrounded by nature.”

Bob was over-the-moon about how well his girlfriend liked where he came from. Given, he knew that she liked nature and there was plenty of it on their property Once the car was in the park, the couple got out and grabbed their items from the trunk. Y/N let Bob walk in front of her because of it being his house and she didn’t feel comfortable just walking in. “Mom, Dad?” Bob yelled once he opened the door and came in without knocking. The chattering in the kitchen halted upon hearing Bob’s voice and the sound of footsteps heading towards the beginning of the room couldn’t be missed.

“Robby!” A high-pitched voice squealed as Bob got tackled in a hug. That made him have to regain his balance. The strong smell of cotton candy wafted over to Y/N which caused her to crinkle up her nose.

“Elaine, what did I tell you?” Bob’s sister spoke up as she got in sight of what was happening. “He has a girlfriend, if you’re going to act like that just go home.” She spoke up again while rolling her eyes. The younger girl gave Y/N a small apologetic smile before yanking her best friend off her older brother.

“It’s good to see you Bub,” Reagan spoke as she walked up to her older brother and pulled him into a hug. “Nice to see you again, Y/N.” She added as she pulled the girl into a hug. “Ignore Elaine, she’s had her mind set on marrying Robert since they dated in high school.” she whispered before pulling away and giving the couple a smile.

“Good to have you back, little brother.” Bob’s older brother Sean spoke pulling Bob into a hug and nodding at Y/N with a smile on his face. “Nice to see you again, Y/N. We’ll get to know more about each other during your stay.” He added before heading back into

“I’ll take our bags to my old room.” Bob spoke as he picked up all the bags. “where’s mom and dad?” he asked his sister as he passed her.

“They went to the store for last minute items that mom forgot she needed.” Reagan spoke as she followed behind Bob but turned into the kitchen instead of going to his old bedroom.

“So your Y/N? The girl that everyone talks so highly about?” Elaine asked like she was trying to size the girl up.

“I guess so.” The Mitchell girl replied before heading in the direction where Bob went.

“Don’t be fooled,” Elaine started causing Y/N to roll her eyes but she stopped to face the desperate girl anyway. “Bob promised me a future too.” She stated before prancing off into the kitchen.

Y/N walked into Bob’s old room where he was putting his clothes away in his old closet. The younger girl was rubbing her temples before plopping down on her boyfriend’s bed. “What’s up?” Bob sighed as he stopped what he was doing and joined his girl on the bed.

“You really did a number on Elaine, huh?” Y/N muttered while she laid her head over on Bob’s shoulder. The jet lag was starting to set in, and the annoying voice of the girl downstairs was making the girl have a headache.

“Believe it or not we weren’t that serious. We dated for like four months and then I graduated and decided to go to the navy. She begged for me to marry her so she could say she was married to someone in the military.” Bob explained as he laid his head over on hers. “I didn’t see a point in marriage. I tried to love her but I couldn’t.”

“What about now?” Y/N asked quietly as her nerves set in. The couple hadn’t really talked much about marriage, but they had painted a picture of their future together. “Your view on marriage, I mean.” She whispered.

“I see us getting married.” He answered softly as his hand grabbed hers “I’ve never loved someone as deeply as I love you. Even if we broke up now, you’ve already ruined me, Y/N.”

Y/N let out a small huff and snort mix, “yeah right, bobby.” she muttered as she glanced up at him and noticed his blue eyes staring a hole through her. “I promise you that I am not that special, there are millions of girls out there better than me.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.” The wso replied as he leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on his girl’s lips. The couple heard the door open, and voices pick up. The shuffling around and sound of grocery bags were enough to make Bob grab Y/N’s hand and head out of his room

“We noticed the car in the driveway, did Bob and Y/N get here?” A sweet lady’s voice asked as Bob’s siblings started talking amongst themselves.

“We made it about 30 minutes ago.” Bob spoke up as he walked into the kitchen with the Mitchell girl’s hand intertwined with his. Irene and Joe walked over to hug their son before Irene pulled Y/N into her embrace.

“It’s so great to see you, honey.” Irene smiled as she pulled away from the hug she started. “I hope my son’s been treating you right.” She stated with a knowing look. Some how her statement sounded like a question in a way.

“He’s been great, perfect, really.” the Mitchell girl spoke as her cheeks got a bit red. She never liked being put on the spot and knowing that this Christmas will determine if Bob’s family likes her was enough to make her double check herself.

The rest of the evening was spent with Bob and his family catching up. Irene getting to know Y/N before the girl excused herself after dinner and headed to bed. Claiming the Jet lag had gotten ahold of her but she’d be up for more bonding time tomorrow.

“I can come with you.” Bob offered starting to stand up before she ushered him to sit back down.

“No, spend time with your family.” Y/N insisted. “You can come to bed later. I’m just going to call my dad and tell him that I made it, before going to sleep.” She assured.

That’s what the girl did, she went to Bob’s old room and called Pete so he wouldn’t worry from not hearing from the girl. After talking to her father she had laid in bed and slowly drifted off to sleep. Bob had come to bed around 10 pm and carefully climbed in his bed to not wake up his girl.

*2 Days Later*

Over the last two days the Floyd household had gotten pretty full. It was now Christmas Eve and everyone was getting ready for the evening dinner and then the first round of presents. The second round of presents would come tomorrow morning, something that Bob’s aunt and uncles came up with to encourage their kids to go to bed early.

“Mrs. Floyd, I can help you if you want to go open presents with your kids.” Y/N offered as she stepped into the kitchen. Bob’s aunt and uncle were trying to settle everyone down. “I can hold the food down until you get done.” she explained a bit better as she walked over to where she was fixing a pre-dinner. Something that Y/N didn’t know about, the fact that they have a big dinner on Christmas and a medium dinner the night before. She wasn’t used to big dinners, honestly.

“No, Hunny, they can wait. You have to open your presents too.” Bob’s mom told the younger girl as she started on her potatoes. “and please, call me Irene.”

Y/N was confused about why she would have presents under the tree. She had only met Bob’s family once before this and they only stayed for a day. No one really got to meet her and get to know her. “Bob and I aren’t exchanging gifts until in the morning. So I can really take it off your hands.” She offered again softly.

Irene gave the girl a smile. “Did you know that you are the first girl that Robert has ever brought home since he joined the navy? He’s told us about a few girlfriends but later he ended up telling us that he didn’t see a future with them.” Y/N’s shocked expression stayed on her face for a moment before she came to her senses. “That tells me that you’re important to my son and so Joe and I bought you a few presents too. We never like anyone to feel left out.”

The Mitchell girl felt herself blush before glancing through the door into the living room. Bob was in there playing with some of the kids that had showed up this morning. They were his cousins and she heard him apologize not knowing that his entire family would be here and not just the usual. Y/N understood, he was home from the Navy and that wasn’t a common thing. “I love him, a lot.” She spoke up as Bob met her eyes and gave her a smile. She finally turned around towards her boyfriend’s mom again and let Bob go back to what he was doing. “I hate to ask and I trust Bob completely, but what’s the story behind Elaine?” She whispered so no one would risk hearing her.

Irene huffed a bit before thinking about the problematic girl that Reagan had brought to Christmas this year. The older woman knew that Elaine never stood a chance when Bob was bringing Y/N around his family. Not that she stood a chance anyway. “I don’t even know why Robby dated her in the first place, he wasn’t interested in her. Maybe he just wanted to have some experience before he went out in the world.” Irene huffed making Y/N cringe at the news that those two were probably each other’s first. “They broke up when he joined the navy, she kept on pushing for them to get married since he would be away all the time. He kept telling her that he didn’t want to settle down at that young age. I mean he was freshly 18. He hadn’t really got to experience other relationships.”

“Was she in love with him or just obsessed?” Y/N asked softly as she helped the older woman put all the food in the rightful place. Dinner was basically done now and they just needed to get the plates and silverware out.

“Both, i guess. I’m not clear on that.” Irene answered before she turned to the younger girl that she knew held her son’s heart. “He loves you, Y/N. so so much. I can tell by the way he acts around you.”

Y/N went to answer before a voice interrupted their conversation, “What are you two talking about?” Bob asked softly as he entered the kitchen and went over to his mother and girlfriend.

Irene sent a wink to the Mitchell girl before leaving the kitchen to go get the rest of the family. Bob raised his eyebrow at his girlfriend as he waited for her to talk. “You need a hair cut, ya know.” Y/N stated as a smile grew on her face.

“You aren’t going to tell me?” Bob asked before he kissed her cheek.

“Not a chance, Lt.” The girl laughed as the family started gathering in the kitchen to get ready to eat.

“I’m sorry my family went all out on those gifts,” Bob sighed as he ran a hand over his face. “I didn’t tell them what you liked so if you don’t like them, then we can do something.”

“Babe, it’s the thought that counts. But they were lovely.” Y/N honestly wasn’t expecting to receive what she did from the Floyd family. You could tell that they spent the same money on you as they did Bob, which was crazy since he was their son. “I love you, you know.” She told him even though she knew that he knew how she felt.

“I love you.” Bob mumbled before pressing his lips to hers.

The couple woke up to the smell of lunch already cooking. Y/N could smell the ham and turkey baking as she looked over at the clock on bobs nightstand. 10:49 lit up in big red letters causing the girl to furrow her eyebrows at how she slept so long. “Bobby.” She whispered as she turned around in his arms so she was facing him. “Babe.” She mumbled again.

“Mhm?” He questioned as he stretched. The sheet falling down his shirtless chest, evidence of their previous activities. “Is it really 10:52?” He asked as his eyes caught the clock.

“That’s why I was trying to wake you.” Y/N mumbled as she got out of bed and put her undergarments back on and grabbed her outfit for Christmas out of her bag. “I have to put on light makeup, I’ll be down in a minute.”

Bob got ready and headed down to his family that was waiting in the kitchen and living room. Y/N quickly put her makeup on and did her hair so she looked decent and left the room. Y/N knew that she needed to talk to Reagan before everyone started opening gifts. Mainly because she needed to know if what she felt was true was accurate.

Two pink lines popped up instantly on the test that Y/N was holding. Reagan had taken the girl to the store with a few questions asked along the way. Turns out Irene had forgotten a condiment from the store and needed that as well.

“So?” Reagan mumbled from outside her private bathroom. She had noticed what the Mitchell girls bag held and immediately wanted to know if she was going to be an aunt or not.

Y/N walked out of the bathroom with her hands trembling, “it’s positive.” She spoke, the words sounding foreign to her. She carefully handed the test over to Reagan.

Before either of the girls could say anything else, the Floyd girls bedroom door opened and Sean walked in with Elaine behind him. “Mom’s been looking for you two.” Sean spoke up before looking down in his sisters hand. “Is that?” He asked looking between the two girls.

Reagan and Y/N looked at each other as the Mitchell girl was pleading with her eyes to take the fall. Reagan understood that the other wanted to tell her brother before the rest of his siblings or family. “It’s mine.” Reagan spoke up. “It’s negative.” She added before walking in her bathroom and throwing it away. “Those one night stands getcha sometimes.” She added as she ushered everyone out of the room.

“Thank you.” Y/N whispered as she passed her boyfriends sister.

The four joined the family down in the kitchen. The kids were already eating and other family members had started a line around the kitchen. Bob was nowhere to be found in the kitchen, which made Y/N sneak away from the rest of his family and wonder off to his bedroom.

“No, Natasha. I can’t talk right now.” Bob was whispering when Y/N quietly entered the room. You could tell that he didn’t hear his girlfriend come in. “she doesn’t know, and rooster can’t know either. why? because he’ll kill me.” Bob mumbled. “If either of them knew what we have been doing this last year, rooster would kill me, and I don’t even want to know Y/N’s reaction would be.” the slightly younger girl felt tears well in her eyes. Of course, it was partly her pregnancy maybe, but the fact that Bob sounded suspicious had her worried. She never once doubted him, not in slightest, so why did this all sound like cheating to her.

“Babe,” Y/N called making herself known. She was hoping that she was masking the worriedness and sadness on her face. “Your mom is wanting us.”

“Listen, I have to go. Talk to you later.” Bob hung up the phone and walked towards his girlfriend. “Sorry, Bradley called. Apparently, them two are having some troubles.”

If there was one thing that Y/N Mitchell picked up from Pete, it was how to hide emotions. Something that he had been good at since Goose’s death. “I hope they work it out.” She mumbled as Bob intertwined their hands together before they left his room.

After everyone ate it was time for presents and that is when Bob and Sean took the gator to go check on some animals. Y/N sat alone in the corner until she was joined by Elaine. The Mitchell girl dreaded what was to come, but she knew that she wouldn’t make a scene. It was Christmas after all.

“What’s wrong?” Elaine asked softly. The annoying sound in her voice completely gone. “I know, I was bitch earlier... I just wanted to see if Robert was serious. I am sorry for how I acted.” She apologized making Y/N give her a small smile.

“Even though I probably shouldn’t trust you, I heard a strange conversation between Bobby and a mutual friend of ours. It honestly sounded like they had been cheating on me and my brother with each other.” Y/N mumbled as she watched the kids go crazy over their gifts.

“The positive pregnancy test in Reagan’s trash can has nothing to do with your feelings?” Elaine asked softly and quietly. Y/N’s eyes widen slightly as she turned away from the girl. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone.”

“Reagan told you it was hers.” Y/N stated as she felt the nerves act up and her hands get clammy.

“I have been out with Reagan everywhere; we are best friends after all. She hasn’t hooked up since her ex-boyfriend. That was way too long for her to want to take a test.” the younger girl explained.

“I haven’t told him yet.” Y/N mumbled as she played with her fingers.

“I know. If it helps, Robert is head over heels for you. Whatever you heard had to be a mistake. He’s always been loyal to everyone, even if he wasn’t happy.” She whispered as the two boys entered the room.

The two girls gave each other a smile as Sean asked to speak with Elaine for a moment. Bob had joined his girlfriend in the spot that his ex-girlfriend had left.

“What was that about?” Bob asked softly as he grabbed your hand.

“She was apologizing.” Y/N said before turning towards Bob. “We need to talk.”

Bob nodded before he stood up and offered his hand for Y/N. She grabbed his hand and stood up. “I want to take you somewhere.” With that the couple made their way out of the house and to Joe’s gator that was sitting outside. “I know you said that you love how peaceful it is here, so I want to show you around for a bit.” Bob said as he helped her up in the UTV.

The couple made their way away from the ranch house. Y/n honestly thought that he would stop and show all of the animals that he took care of as a kid and so on. That’s not what he was doing at all, and she realized it once they passed all the animals and headed towards a trail in the wood lining. She figured now was as good as any to ease into the natasha talk. She didn’t want to come straight out and accuse him of cheating, it wouldn’t be like either of them. “It’s crazy, isn’t it?” she asked softly as she took in the beautiful scenery.

“what is?” Bob asked softly as he drove carefully on the trail.

“How we’ve been together for so long.” Y/N stated as she looked down at her freshly polished finger nails. “I almost figured you and Natasha would have eventually ended up together.” she whispered but loud enough for Bob to hear her.

The Floyd boy let out a laugh, “She’s like another sister. I am head over heels in love with you, Y/N/N. I already told you that you have ruined me and i meant that.”

Y/N felt a bit at ease, but she knew that her worry would still be there until she figured out why he was calling Natasha in secret. It was still a bit of an uneasy feeling. “I have something I really need to tell you-” Y/N started only to cut herself off when the trail ended at what seemed to be a hunting cabin. The cabin had lights hung up around it and the porch was decorated beautifully.

“I want to give you a tour and then you can let me know if you’d like to stay out here tonight.” Bob spoke before getting out of the gator and then heading towards the other side to help his girl out. ‘I thought we could use some alone time.”

Y/n gave her boyfriend a smile before waiting for him to open the cabin door. It wasn’t very big, but you could tell that it was made for a hunting party or maybe even birthday parties for the Floyd’s.

“This is the living room space, it isn’t much but the couch does pull out into a bed.” He explained. “Then the kitchen is over here, it isn’t anything fancy, but I already stocked it up with your favorite snacks.” He blushed a bit making y/n squeeze his hand. “In this room is an extra bathroom and this one is the extra bedroom. bunk beds. And then the master bedroom.” He stated as Y/n felt his hands start to sweat a bit. “Open it.” he urged softly.

Y/N gave him a look before grabbing the door handle and twisting the doorknob. Pushing the door open, a small gasp left her lips as her hand came to cover her mouth. She felt her eyes watering up as Bob stepped in front of her slightly. The room was covered in rose peddles, had blackout curtains hung up so the candles and fairy lights were the only lights in the room. Mini letter lights spelled out “Marry Me?” on the bedside table.

“Y/N, I have loved you since you took notice of me in the hard deck. I thought you were beautiful when you came over to greet Bradley and I wasn’t expecting this to go anywhere because you are way out of my league. How i managed to get you and keep you is out of my knowledge. I love you so much and i know that I want to be with you forever. Will you please do me the honor of marrying me?” Bob asked.

Y/N could sense his nerves and she knew there was a lot more that he wanted to say. She knew what her answer was even if he didn’t get everything he wanted to say out in the open. “of course, Bobby.” She mumbled as tears came down her face. Bob slipped the shiny diamond ring on her finger before standing up and pulling her in for a kiss. “I love you so much.”

“You still have a few more presents at the house, so we should probably get going.” Bob mentioned after he placed another kiss on his fiancee’s lips.

“Were you serious about staying here tonight?” She asked bob as he nodded, ‘because I would love to celebrate alone with you tonight.” she mumbled.

The ride back to the ranch house was silent. The two were just enjoying each other’s peaceful company before the Floyd household would start celebrating. Y/N had no idea that one of Bob’s Christmas presents were waiting for her back at the ranch house to congratulate her. Of course, Bob asked Maverick for permission before he proposed. He asked him months before he even asked, he wanted the time to be perfect and he knew the Floyd hunting cabin would be the perfect place. That’s when he knew it would be around Christmas time.

“I’m ready to go spend the night with you.” Y/N whined slightly as her left hand made its way to the back of Bob’s head as they pulled up to the house.

“You can in about three hours.” Bob mumbled. He then grabbed her hand and gave it a kiss before getting out and helping her out of the gator. “Your next present is right through that door.” He mumbled kissing her head.

Y/N gave her fiancé a small smile while shaking her head. “You’re something else, Floyd.” She stated as she walked into the house first. The multiple shouts of “congratulations!” And balloons flying everywhere made the girl jump. Before she noticed what bob was talking about.

“Congratulations, sweetheart.” The older man said as he opened his arms for his daughter to come give him a welcoming hug. “How did my little girl get grown up so fast.?” He mumbled with his voice growing in sadness.

“Time flies.” Y/N mumbled pulling away from Maverick. “I’ll always be your little girl.” She added as she wiped the tears from her face and her father did the same. Maverick never liked showing emotion in front of anyone and over the years he had slowly been okay with showing emotion in front of Penny, Y/N, and Bradley.

“I know you will.” He nodded before Bradley pulled the girl into a hug.

“Brownie, don’t mess up the hair.” Y/N groaned as she shoved her brother figure off of her playfully.

“Here I thought I’d be married before you.” He shook his head.

“Grow a pair and maybe you still can.” Y/N winked as she playfully hit him. The girl then looked over and saw Natasha beside Bradley wearing a smile on her face. She nodded at the girl, still feeling uneasy about the situation earlier. She quickly turned around and wrapped her arms around bob. “Thank you so much. It means a lot that you’d ask my dad and brother to fly out here.”

“Anything for you.” He mumbled before pulling her into a kiss. “I love you so much.”

*a few hours later*

After opening presents from everyone, the families all made their way to bed. Bradley, Natasha, and Maverick was staying in a guest loft inside an extra barn that the Floyd’s had used for their stable men. With Joe being retired, they didn’t need to hire anyone to help with animals anymore so the loft was left unused and was cleaned up for Y/N’s family to come stay in.

Y/N and bob had made their way to the cabin about 30 minutes ago, where Bob had immediately drawn the couple a bath to unwind. That’s where they were, in a soaker tub (which was a new upgrade) and relaxing against one another. The bubbles covered their bodies as Y/N’s back laid against Bob’s chest.

“So, did you propose to me in the room you lost your virginity in? Cause if so, very classy Lt. Floyd.” Y/N joked with a laugh and intertwined her left hand with his hand. His fingers playing with the ring on her finger.

“No, you were actually only the third.” He admitted honestly. Most people had the talk before getting engaged but it didn’t bother the couple. They knew that they were each other’s forever and that’s what mattered.

“Elaine?” She asked expectantly.

“Never did.” Bob spoke softly. “I wasn’t very popular and I wasn’t the one that people went for. One night stands were never my thing. I was 21 when it happened. It was with someone I thought I loved, but now I know that I didn’t know what love was. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you, that’s how I know you’re my forever.”

Y/N turned her face up so she could look at her handsome man. “I lost mine at 18.” She mumbled before placing a kiss on his jaw. “It was someone I almost married, he was in the army, turns out he knocked up another girl while I was engaged to him so, that’s why that ended.”

Bob’s hand came up and rubbed over her jaw line as he lowered his head and placed a soft kiss on her lips. “That’ll never happen with me.” He promised.

“I have to ask you something,” y/N whispered so she wouldn’t cause tension. “I heard you on the phone with Natasha, earlier and you lied to me and said it was Bradley.” she started. She could see bob’s gears shifting in his head, trying to see where this was going. “You said that Bradley would kill you and that you wouldn’t wanna see my reaction if I found out what you two were doing.”

“Did you think I was cheating on you?” He asked carefully as he noticed panic in Y/N’s eyes. “Baby, it was Natasha helping me buy things for the proposal and ring. I told her not to tell Bradley that I asked for her help instead of his for ring shopping. I also didn’t wanna see your reaction if you found the ring before I was ready because I really wanted it to be special.”

Y/N gave him a small smile, “it was my anxiety, it wasn’t me in general. I know you’d never do that.”

The two carried on with conversation before getting out of the bath and headed towards the shower to clean themselves. After finishing showering the two went to their bags that were placed on the king bed in the cabin.

“Bobby,” y/n called as she tucked her towel so it would stay up on its own. “I have one more present for you, I just didn’t want to give it to you in front of everyone.”

Bob gave his girl a look before carefully grabbing the gift box out of her hand. It wasn’t too big but it wasn’t super small either. It was neatly decorated with his name scribbled on top. “You didn’t have to get me anything else.”

“Just open it.” She urged with a smile. She could feel the tears coming while she waited for him.

He sat down on the end of the bed with y/n standing beside of him. He carefully opened the box and read the top before his eyes widen and he noticed tue white stick with a blue lid. A red plus sign on a test, and pink two lines on the other stick. The box contained a letter board reading “I can’t wait to meet you daddy.” And the lid of the box, which he read first said, “to the best daddy ever.”

Y/N wanted to get a pair of booties or a onesie to put in their but she didn’t get a chance too. She wanted to wait and make it special but today was special just as well. “Are you serious?” Bob asked with tears in his eyes. “Am I gonna be a dad?”

Y/N nodded as her own tears started spilling, “you’re gonna be a daddy.” She whispered as Bob stood up and pulled her into a hug. “I just found out today and the only one that knows is Reagan. I thought we could wait and tell everyone after our first ultrasound to make sure everything is okay.”

“Baby, you’ve just given the best gift ever.” He mumbled as he rocked the couple back and forth.

“I love you forever, Robert Floyd.”

“I love you, Y/N Floyd, forever and always.”

| The last part! It took so long because I had so many other problems but it’s all good. I have a Jake “Hangman” series coming so… if you like him then you can check my profile because it should be up in the next few days! It could have ended better but it is what it is.|

#top gun #top gun maverick #top gun oneshot #top gun imagines #bob floyd imagine #robert bob floyd #robert bob floyd x reader #bob floyd x reader #robert bob floyd imagine #only exception bob floyd series #only exception series #bob floyd x mitchell reader

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ladylooch · 2 years ago

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Loving & Leaving- Part 3

Visit the series page here.

A/N: Eep! I am so excited you all are loving this. It bring me so much joy. I am legit giddy posting this next chapter 😁 I hope you love it. This fic is consuming so much of my writing time. I'm very focused on getting these two right. I know I've nailed it when I'm editing and feel the way I want the reader to feel.

Word Count: 4.3k

Warnings: SMUT 18+ Content!, Swearing, Angsty, jealousy, poor choices. ha!

Halloween was five days ago, but by the look of the streets of Hoboken, you wouldn’t know. Being from Switzerland, we don’t celebrate Halloween. But when I surprised Nico with a quick visit to America, he insisted I needed to join for the team’s get together, which had to be moved into November because of a Halloween away game. Usually, it’s done at someone’s house, but this year, no one really wanted to host, so we are heading to the bar the team frequents after home wins. Currently, I’m doing the female right of passage by freezing my ass off as we shuffle down the street. Tinker Bell was probably not the warmest choice for me, but it is definitely the sluttiest. Paired with a short, sequined green dress and a thin pair of wings, my emerald high heels reflect the yellowy hue of the New Jersey street lights.

Despite the cold, I look hot. We walk by several groups of people loitering around. I can feel eyes follow me as I move forward. My confidence grows as I smirk, weaving my arm through my brothers for balance as the sidewalk gets a little rocky. Nico wraps a secure hand around my waist before pointing to my right. There is a line to get in, unless you’re with a professional hockey player. The bass of Salt Shaker by Ying Yang Twins rattles my teeth in my head when we step into the dark space. It’s packed with any character you can imagine. I grin, looking at Nico, silently agreeing that this is going to be just as fun as he promised.

Which is exactly what I need.

Ever since Timo left me at the end of the driveway, life has taken on a shade of gray. Work has felt more like a chore than a passion. I passively agreed to a few dates with a friend’s friend, which has been fine, but nothing I want to pursue further. I’ve found myself dreaming of America, which is why I booked a quick ticket two weeks ago, then called Nico to share the news. He was surprised. I’ll be back here for Christmas and two, long international trips in a row is new behavior for me.

“I’ll never say no to a visit from you.” He concluded. And it was set.

In a red wine clouded night, I texted Timo last week to let him know I would be in town. I’m still waiting on a response. Despite his silence, I know he’s here tonight, and ignoring me when I look this good, won’t be easy for him. The group of Devils is sitting at the back of the bar in their usually spot. Nico leads the way, my hand on the back of his firefighter costume to not get lost in the sea of people.

When we reach the group, my eyes immediately find Timo. He is to my right, chatting with Dawson Mercer. He looks up as he laughs, eyes catching mine. I see him visibly suck in a breath before his eyes rake over my whole costume. He tries to hide the flicker of desire, but I know him better than that.

“Boys, you remember my sister, Emma.” Nico introduces me to the table. All the boys give drink tilts or waves except for Timo, who is suddenly fixated on a busty cat at the other table. My eyebrows tug together. He’s not fooling me, but fine, he wants to be like that, I won’t make it easy. I make my way around the table, patting each of the boys on the back until I get to the empty seat next to Timo. I plop right down next to him, grabbing his beer from his hand and chugging the rest of it.

“Uh. You’re welcome?” He questions with a snip.

“Just couldn’t wait. Go get me another.” He stares me down, blue eyes tumultuous. The cat is distracted by Ted Lasso and leaves to trail after him. Timo sighs in reservation of an opportunity blown. His chair scrapes the wood floor harshly as he knocks back from the table to go to the bar.

“Here.” He slams the golden liquid down on the table. Some of it sloshes down the glass and puddles on the table. “Kinda bullshit considering you don’t like beer.”

“Oh, I like beer. It just doesn’t like me.” It turns me into a sloppy lightweight drunk, which he is well aware of. I chug a few more sips, licking the foam from my top lip without taking my eyes from his. A whole conversation silently passed between us.

“I said I’m done.” He reminds me. Not sure who he’s trying to convince here cause he devours my lips as they plump in disbelief.

“We’ll see. Too cool for a costume?” I gesture to his white tuxedo. It’s probably a little fancier than his usual attire, but not completely out of character.

“I’m James Bond.”

“Without a martini?”

“What are you?”

“Tinker Bell.” I point to the wings on my back. His eyes hover at the way my skirt hikes further up my thigh as I cross my leg. My bare ass is practically hanging out.

“I can’t believe your brother let you out like that. And where is your coat? It’s like 30 degrees out.” I have to suck my cheeks in to avoid a smile. Even when he’s hurt and mad at me, he cares.

“Hot girls get hypothermia on Halloween. It’s like a right of passage.” I shrug.

“What do you know about Halloween?” He squints, licking his lips after a taste of his beer.

“Not much. But I know how good I look tonight.” I flick my hair back off my shoulder, scrunching it up and tossing him a kiss. “Play your cards right, Bond, and you’ll be the one in my bed.” He laughs without humor, leaning forward until he crowds my space. His cologne assaults my nose, mixing with my flowery perfume. They’re complimentary scents. His gaze drags over my face; a hint of interest is quickly squashed with a cold stare.

“I think it’s time for me to be the clear one. All you are to me tonight is my teammates’ sister.” My eyebrows draw tight together in shock. “Have a good night, Emma.” He pushes back from his chair again, following a few of his teammates across the bar to the pool tables.

What the fuck just happened?

- - -

My ears pound in steady pulses at both the loud music and my beer buzz. I sway as I attempt to return from the bathroom, bumping into Waldo.

“Sorry.” I mutter, patting his arm in acknowledgement before moving on. I get back to the group of Devils, standing next to my brother so he knows I’m back from my bathroom break. Nico hands me back my beer without looking at me.

I feel so invisible tonight. My brother doesn’t care- too busy chatting up a Powderpuff girl. Timo has been gone from the group since he referred to me as his teammate’s sister. I drunkenly snort at the memory. Sure, he must cum in all his teammate’s sisters then. I slump against Nico’s shoulder, slinging my arm around them and drawing his attention.

“Ah..” He coughs out, wiggling away from me. “My sister, Emma.” He tells the Pink Powderpuff.

“OMG! My Big is named Emma!” She shouts excitedly. I glance at Nico who shrugs. I stare back at him like, really? This one? He grins, shrugging again, silently indicating he is interested in her for only one thing… and one night.

“So fun.” I respond, tossing a fake smile on my lips. The sounds of Party in the U.S.A. blast over the speakers, so Blossom drags my brother out onto the makeshift dance floor. I shake my head at him, rolling my eyes at his choices.

That’s when I see him, pressed tightly up with another blonde. What is with him and blue eyed blondes? I have dark, chestnut hair and eyes. What’s he trying to prove here? I grab my beer, chugging down a few hefty sips before slamming the glass back on the table. He’s doing this to torture me. They’re standing close together, talking and taking fast drinks of their High Noons. He told me he didn’t like those. His smile is genuine, crinkling the corners of his eyes. I can almost hear his soft laughter from here.

She snakes an arm around his hips, stepping closer. He does the same, putting his hands on her hips. I swear a piece of my soul dies when he leans even closer to hear her speak. After months of feeling numb, I want to feel something. Anything. And he’s right here in front of me, acting like I’m nothing to him now. I can’t stand it. I want to lash out, scream, pull his face to mine and shove my tongue into his mouth until he kisses me back with as much desperation as I feel in blood right now. Instead of going to tell him that, I grab the first Devils player I can, stepping into his embrace. It’s John Marino.

“Hey.” He grins. I smile back, then slide behind him to look at Timo. His eyes are still on the blonde. If it was quieter in here, John could hear my whimper. John's hands are firmly in respectable places on my waist, barely touching me. I give him an easy smile, stepping closer so our bodies touch all along our fronts.

“You look like a good time.” I murmur to him, running my hands through the long strands of his brown hair. He’s dressed as Buzz Lightyear, dome helmet flipped up. “Can you breathe like that?” I joke, fingering the plastic.

“Barely, but not cause of the helmet.” I laugh easily, crossing my wrists at the back of his neck as we sway together. His hand slides down my lower back. A heat runs through my body that has nothing to do with John. It’s Timo. He’s watching now. I encourage John to put his hands lower, going to my tip toes to whisper in his ear.

“Must be my pixie dust.”

“It’s putting a spell on me.” His obvious interest guides his hands further down until he grips my ass in both hands. I’m guided by the ache in my chest for Timo and the undivided attention I’m getting. Maybe I could have someone else tonight, just to forget about him. He doesn’t care. He’s obsessed with anyone who isn’t me in this bar. I grin at John, tilting my lips up towards his. They never meet. A different hand comes around my waist, pulling me back into a solid, familiar chest and out of John's grip.

“That’s enough. She’s Nico’s sister for fucks sake.” Timo growls. John holds his hands up, backing away, clearly heading the warning from his left wing. It’s not John's fault. He doesn’t know who I used to belong to. Which is exactly the look Timo gives me when his blue eyes pierce mine.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Timo snarls, strong hands holding my hips in place when I try to wiggle away.

“Leave me alone.” I shoving off his chest. It’s a weak attempt and my fingers curl in, groping him more than anything else.

“You’re just doing this shit on purpose.” He spits out in disgust. Like he wasn’t just feeling up a cat? Pfffft.

“At least I’m not grinding with Jersey TRASH.” I snort. “That girl? What the fuck does she have that I don’t?” I gesture to my short green dress that doesn’t leave much to the imagination.

Woof, I’m drunk. And desperate.

He stares back at me. His hands are still fastened to my hips, squinting in the low lighting of the bar as the world moves around us. Then, he leans forward, resting his mouth close to my ear as he looks beyond me to where the rest of the team still sits.

“Emma, you know how perfect you are to me. But you are killing me. I’m trying to move on with my life.” Fear grips my stomach, icing my buzz and my anger. I don’t want him to move on. I want him to bring me home, falling each other and forget anything else but how good it feels when we are together.

“I think I’m going to be sick.” I stutter.

“Do you need to go to the bathroom?” He looks around for a sign as to where they are. He starts tugging me that way, but I stop him.

“I just want to go home.” Something about the look on my face softens him. His touch becomes gentle and safe again. It reminds me of when it’s been late, our third time around, and he’s trying to soothe the angry, red rashes he made along my hips and breasts.

“I’ll take you.” He whispers into my ear, lips slicing across my cheek.

I wrap my arm around his waist, putting my face against his pec. One of his hands moves up to my head, caressing me to his chest. He drops a kiss there then calls across the bar to my brother. I feel him motion around and Nico must understand because he doesn’t follow us out. When I hit the nippy air, I chatter in my skimpy costume. Timo shrugs his winter jacket off, wrapping it around my body as we walk the two blocks back to their apartment building. It’s not enough, so he keeps his arm around my shoulder, his body heat transferring to me. He drops his arms when we enter the building together.

“You drive me crazy.” He mutters when we are in the elevator, rolling his eyes and stretching his tense neck out. I think back to the girl at the bar, wondering if he wishes she was here instead. They would ride up to his place together. Maybe she would get on her knees and take him deep into her mouth until he couldn’t take it anymore. My stomach twists again.

I stare down at my heels in silence after that visual. I feel gross. My heavy make up is clogging my pores with each passing second. My feet hurt. The elevator spins and Timo looks like he would rather be anywhere than here with me. Tears make the floor fade as the door opens on the 13th floor. No attempt to stop at the 10th this time. Timo waits for me to step out first.

“Let’s get you in bed.” He encourages with a friendly hand on the upper back.

I dig around in my purse until I find my keys, giving them to Timo to open Nico’s apartment. He pushes the door open, allowing me to walk through first. I sulk in, tossing my purse on the floor, punting my heels off. The door quietly clicks shut. I whip my head around.

“I’m still here.” He kicks his expensive sneakers off and moves towards me with his hands in his pockets. I watch his approach with frustrated eyes. I am riding a rollercoaster of emotions right now. I hate him. I want him. I can’t stand to be in the same room with him. I think I’ll die if he leaves here without touching me. He sees all of this on my face as he stops in front of me.

“Why are you still here?” I ask.

“I don’t know.” He whispers back.

He doesn’t remove his hands from his pockets. He doesn’t step forward to touch me. Nothing. He just stares back at me like I’m some ticking bomb he should run in the opposite direction from. I hate it. Agitation builds in my body and makes my skin crawl. The elastic of the wings begins to feel like it’s cutting off the circulation in my arms. I try to wiggle my way out of them, getting frustrated.

“Fucking, stupid, cheap, pieces of crap.” I mutter, tugging at the white elastic to try and get free.

“Let me help.” Timo says, gripping my hand to stop my movements. He easily loops his fingers through the two straps, tugging them off my arms as I let them dangle behind my back.

“Thank you.” I whisper then bite my cheek. “Can you get my-” I already feel his touch on the zipper of my dress, working it slowly down, tooth by tooth, exposing my bare back and the top part of my butt. I hold my breath as he gets to the end. His strong hands spiral around my ribs to my stomach, pulling me back into his hard erection. I rest the back of my head on his shoulder and sigh.

“All night, I’ve been wondering if you were wearing anything under this. I wish I didn’t know.” He murmurs in my ear. My hair brushes along my cheek from his breath. I hear him swallow hard. “I should leave.” I don’t breathe, just continue to stare straight ahead at the hallway in front of me. I reach for his fingers, lacing mine between them and moving our hands to my hips, pushing the dress out so it falls down my body. Then, I bring them up my body, balancing the weight of my breasts in our hands.

“Jesus, Em. You’re making this so hard on me.”

“I know. I can feel it.”

“We are supposed to be done with each other.” He swipes his fingers across my hard nipples like he’s already forgotten his words. A flicker of hurt hangs in the air from his tone, but then I release one of his hands to cup his hard erection and it disappears into the desire between us. He rolls his hips into my touch.

“There are some things a girl just can’t quit. You’re one of them, Timo Meier.”

He spins me fast to face him. My lips tilt up to meet his and he kisses me back with frenzy. Our mouthes devour each other greedily. His hands run everywhere and nowhere on my body. I grope at his back, then run my hands over his taut ass, squeezing us tight together. He grinds his hips into me, pushing his erection against my stomach. His lips move from my mouth to my jaw, then down to my throat where he sucks my skin into his mouth.

“Missed how you feel in my hands, baby.” He murmurs, tongue lapping at the bruise that will go back with me to Switzerland on Sunday. I close my eyes, savoring the way he praises me. God, I missed his sweet words and strong, greedy hands.

We completely forget about being in the middle of the apartment. I shove at his white tuxedo jacket. He helps work it off his strong biceps. I pull back to stare at the suspenders running up and over his shoulders. I aggressively bite my bottom lip and snap them with my hands. He laughs, running his hands along my thighs to pick me up. I shove the straps from his shoulders then get to work on his white buttons.

“Cheater.” I murmur, unsnapping his bowtie when I’m done.

“Bow ties are not my strong point.” He insists as he carefully lays me down on the dining room table. He pulls his wallet out of his pants, tossing it to the left of me for easy access. I watch him, legs spread wide, as he gazes at my folds while undoing his pants. “You guys use this table?”

“No. We eat at the counter.” I laugh as he steps out of his pants. His boxer briefs slide down next and I groan at the sight of him jutting out, rigid and already seeping from the tip.

“That’s good. I’m going to ruin it for you.” I chuckle, reaching up for him. His lips come to mine again, a little less aggressive than before. He takes his time, savoring the feeling of me. His tongue glides along the seam then strokes against mine. I melt in his hands as they come around to protect my head from the wood. Timo sighs heavily into my mouth and I hook my ankles around his butt. He moves his bare cock through my wetness, teasing me, building the tension until my inner muscles pulse around an aching emptiness.

“Love me.” I moan out. He pulls back, searching my face. “Please. Like you said you do.”

“Not how I saw this night going.” He chuckles honestly, smoothing my wild hair back from where a piece of it had been stuck between our mouthes.

“Me either.” I answer honestly. But I ache in so many more places than just my core. My heart beats heavy in my chest, needing to feel a connection with him.

He reaches for a condom in his wallet he had tossed on the table. I grab it from his hands, throwing it to the floor.

“I want you like last time.” He hesitates, nostrils flaring, eyes trailing along my bare body, savoring every curve with his blue gaze. “I’m clean. No one else.”

“Me too.” Relief courses through me.

“Really?”

“Yeah, Em. Not interested in anyone else.” He says it to me like it’s a reminder. The familiar sound of his I love you in Switzerland causes my legs to spread wider for him.

“Show me what you thought about doing to me while we have been apart.” He moans, dropping his face to my lips again.

“I love you like this. So needy and desperate for me to fill you.” He says between teasing strokes again. He grips his cock, steadying his head against my entrance, then gliding his hips forward. My body releases in ecstasy at the feeling of him there.

“Ohmygod.” My eyebrows pull tight together in pleasure. I swallow, then gnaw on my lip as he puts his hands under my hips to pull me farther off the table. Then, he covers my body with his. His hands lace with both of mine and he makes love to me just like I begged. His thrusts are slow and sweet, focused only on my pleasure. He’s deep and generous with each thrust. I stare at him, knowing I’m falling in love with him. He brings his mouth down to mine and our tongues sloppily connect. The table begins to rattle from our movements as I match each of Timo’s deep thrusts with a moan.

“Fuck, I missed you.” He sighs into my mouth.

“Me too. Hate being home without you now.” I admit. I shouldn’t say that to him in the heat of the moment, but it’s true. I do. It’s why I’m here, as much as my brother thinks it is for him.

“I’m sorry I left you like that this summer.” He says, stroking a bit faster into me. “I hate myself for it.”

“It’s okay. I know you had to.” I bring his lips back to mine. “God damn it.” I shout as he fucks harder into me. My orgasm is pulsing within me, squeezing him with each pump.

“Say my name, sweetheart.” I moan it back to him. He puts his lips on mine afterwards, fucking me steadily as I shiver beneath him then collapse into the first wave of my orgasm. “Tell me I can come inside of you. Please.” He sounds tortured.

“Yes. God, yes. Please.” The way we both beg for each other causes a wildness between us. I moan as my second orgasm builds with his faster pumps. I shout his name as I come again, fast, harder this time. Tingles of pleasure rush down my legs so they become limp around his waist. His cum shoots out, filling me, coating my walls in the most intimate way. I grip his shoulders, shoving my face into his neck so I can feel every beat of his heart and gasping breath.

That was without a doubt the best sex we have ever had.

Timo turns his head to kiss my swollen lips. He moans into my mouth as he sputters more into me. His hands rock my hips back into him again as my feminine grunt encourages him more.

“Take me again. Just like that.” I whimper when he tries to pull away.

“Okay, but let’s go to my bed.” He kisses along my face before pulling out of me.

The second time, in Timo’s bed, surrounded by the pieces of his life, is even better.

“You fit perfectly here. Like you could just stay here forever.” He coos when we are done with a third round that started in the shower and ended on the floor of his bedroom, fingers brushing my hair back from my forehead.

“Tell me more.” I sigh, flicking my gaze on his. Fueled by love and afterglow, I barely protest as he begins to say all the usual things about the life he can give to me and all the adventures we can share together. I say nothing, just listen to him speak, thinking about what awaits for me back home. In comparison to this feeling, that life doesn’t matter much to me anymore. I think about telling him that, but it’s late and we’re both high on orgasmic bliss and it doesn’t feel completely right yet.

“You act like Switzerland doesn’t have anything to offer me. You Swiss boys dream too much.” I rub my fingers along his corse stubble. He shakes his head at me.

“Just give in to me, Hischier.”

“Maybe tomorrow.” A soft smile stretches my lips apart. He sighs out a laugh, pressing his mouth over mine. We lazily twirl our tongues together, savoring the feeling of being in each others arms again.

By midnight, we are asleep in a tangle of naked limbs, having no idea what we’ve just done.

#TM: Loving & Leaving #Timo Meier #Timo Meier Smut #hockey writing #New Jersey Devils #NHL fan fiction

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spotofmummery · 1 year ago

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OOC: State of Mummery 2023

On the eve of Amon’s Nameday (tomorrow), I just wanted to take a moment to talk about Spot of Mummery, my creative endeavors (rather the lack of), a bit about what’s happening IRL, and what I’d like to do more of in 2024.

Feel free to take a peek into my life if you wish, below the cut. Your suggestions are always welcome!

I want to start this with a disclaimer – I’m going to talk about difficult things that I don’t normally address here, but I am doing okay. I’ve learned how to work through many difficulties the last couple of years, and this is not a post of lament.

Some might know that I lost my father unexpectedly right before Christmas last year.

Most don’t know that for the last couple of years (and right now currently), I’m also dealing with unexplained chest pain on and off through the year. My heart was checked this past year, and that was all fine. It’s undiagnosed, but I’m thinking (and the cardiologist also thinks) it’s a form of inflammation. The pain I can deal with, the worry about “what is this?” is a bit more troublesome.

All this is to say, I haven’t been very creative in 2023.

During NaNoWriMo of 2022, I finally wrote Amon’s triumphant return to Syrcus Tower in the First, as I’ve wanted to for years. But then, my Dad passed, and it took months for me to finish editing and posting all that writing. I did finally get it done, but my focus was other places, obviously.

In 2023, I haven’t written a word for Amon’s story outside of the Choose Amon’s Adventures (which I’d like to get started up again, maybe) and his silly adventures on Island Sanctuary (which I need to complete with the newest content for the last patch).

My RP interactions here have been little to none. My energy for attending in game events has been low.

I did organize my own event around the NA fanfest, and that went great, actually! Thanks to all who attended!

But aside from that, Lunarcon, and a few small art parties, I’ve kept to myself a lot this year. In fact, my game time in FFXIV is probably an all-time low – and that’s not because I’ve fallen out of love with the game.

On a positive note, the whole fiasco at Twitter/X brought me back to this Tumblr account full-time. I was already moving this direction, but now I’m here primarily. I do have a Pillowfort and a Blue Sky account for Amon, but Tumblr is my main gig.

I’m not exactly sure where I’m going with all this, other than to just note that my creativity and interaction has not been up to snuff this year. I’d love to say something like, “My resolution for next year is to knock it out of the park!” – but the reality is, I’m not sure what I can commit to just yet.

I think what I'd like most of all to start by getting back into enjoying time spent in game with Amon again, for one. Not that I dislike time spent with Amon, just that I recognize that it’s not got that spark that once motivated me (probably user error).

To be fair, though, I haven’t been spending a lot of time with any of my characters in game like I used to. So, it’s not just Amon.

If you’ve gone through a time where you needed to reconnect with your OCs, let me know how that turned out and what you did. I’m open to suggestions!

And if you’ve read all the way here to the end, thanks for listening. You are appreciated, friend! <3

#IRL #Creative struggles #Feedback welcome #Thanks for listening

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themareverine · 18 days ago

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tw religious themes, angst, reflection

It’s December 23rd. I turned 30 on Thursday.

Wow.

A decade ago I was still in college. On the cusp of deciding who I would become, who I was. You don't feel that way when you're 20; there's a deep relief of being out of your teens and finally being an "adult" that, with it, comes the expectation of respect and knowledge. How naive that is, thinking life just somehow downloads. It doesn't.

Then, I dreamed of doing film (still do) and had no idea where life would take me. I loved Jesus, but was nowhere near where I needed to be at His feet. I loved my parents, but wanted so desperately to fly into freedom. I harbored deep hatred toward myself; my body, my personality, who I was. My confidence was in shambles.

Ten years ago, I would be appalled where I am standing right now at 30.

God grabbed a hold of me differently in my 20s and routed me on a path I have fought hard to love and desire. I am embracing new callings and words from the Lord, letting old things go and wrestling with old dreams that I, now, much older, realize were fantasy. I have done things and lived in a way I never imagined. I've done so much of what I never thought, so little of what I ever desired, that my perspectives and interests have changed. And that is a good thing.

I have learned as my birthday has come and gone that life is not nearly so much about expectations and dreams as it is learning who you are, and accepting who God desires for you to be. It's much easier chasing what Jesus has for you, working in tandem than it is to fight the systems of heaven. Dreams evolve and bury, but God and His will for us, it doesn't change. It takes time. And waiting for time isn't nearly as bad as we think it is, it's just difficult.

My prayer at 20 was to figure out who I was and make a name for myself. That, arguably, may or may not have happened. I certainly didn't figure out nearly everything I thought I should, what I wanted, but I figured out other things. My prayer for my 30s, now, is to step farther into what God has planned. To worry less and praise more. To fight my battles in worship and faith, not fear and anxiety and self loathing.

Life is so fleeting in the scope of the everlasting. I could grieve over the years I wasted hated myself and hating being alive because of pain and disappointments, but instead, I know those days happened for a reason: so I could be where I am now, for other people. It wasn't about me. It was about my story, my testament, what I would overcome.

My celebration of all of this is mostly inward. I worked my new job in a new milestone career on Thursday. Suffering with a foot injury means I move slower, right now, which is both good and a bummer. I worked out, had a weekend preparing for Christmas/Hanukkah with family and giving back. Sunday I went to dinner with my family, had my favorite dessert, and opened gifts from my family, which included a stunning citrine stone and diamonds. Three diamonds, for the three persons of the Godhead, and also my 30s; a citrine stone because my favorite color is yellow and to remember to be happy with this journey.

As someone reminded me on my day, I am blessed and highly favored. I am new in His righteousness. I am no longer my own, but I am His, purchased with a high price.

It is good to remember, friends. But it’s even better to forget. I’m still working on letting go and forgetting the old things. The old Miriam. The old days of being lost and worried and unhappy. Embracing the new me is my mission, who God desires me to be.

I’ll try to post the full scope of my thoughts in story.

Here’s to the next decade, and what comes with the 30s.

and yes i did take some noir selfies of myself that i actually love. i haven't selfied in a long time. wearing one of my favorite things (a black blazer that makes me feel like a powerhouse) coupled with a good hair day all just cocktailed together don't judge me!

#reflection #thoughts mare rambles #30 and flirty #30s #my face #hi hello its me

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xflamesandfbombs · 1 month ago

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The “Surviving the Holidays” Playbook: Post-Breakup Edition

Ah, the holidays—when every song, commercial, and Hallmark movie seems to mock your newly single status. Nothing says “Merry Christmas” like Aunt Linda asking, “So, are you seeing anyone special?” while you’re just trying to inhale a fourth cookie in peace.

But don’t worry, boo—I’ve got you. Welcome to The Surviving the Holidays Playbook, your ultimate guide to dodging drama, owning your glow-up, and maybe even laughing through the chaos.

Step 1: Reinvent Your Holiday Traditions

Who says you have to stick to the old traditions you shared with your ex? Ugly sweater parties? Been there, done that. This year, we’re doing “Sparkle and Sip” nights with your besties or solo movie marathons where you pause Love Actually just to roll your eyes at every cheesy kiss.

Take the power back—turn “our traditions” into “your new traditions.” You don’t need mistletoe to thrive, babe. You’re the whole damn holiday miracle.

Step 2: Make a Pep Talk Playlist

Forget “All I Want for Christmas Is You.” We’re talking empowerment anthems. Think Lizzo, Beyoncé, or that one breakup song that makes you feel like the main character every single time. Create a playlist that screams, “I’m thriving, thanks.”

Bonus points if it’s loud enough to drown out your neighbor’s romantic Christmas carols.

Step 3: Gift Yourself Something Fabulous

This year, you’re Santa, and you’re spoiling the heck out of yourself. Always wanted that fancy skincare set or a pair of boots that scream “I’m way too good for you”? Buy them. Wrap them. Put them under the tree. From: You. To: The Absolute Best.

The best part? You don’t have to fake excitement opening a candle you didn’t want. (We’re looking at you, Karen from Secret Santa.)

Step 4: Channel Your Inner Comedian at Family Gatherings

You know the breakup questions are coming. “What happened to what’s-their-name?” “Are you dating anyone yet?” Prepare some witty comebacks. Try:

• “They’re gone, but I’m dating inner peace now, and it’s going great!”

• “I dumped them for Santa. The sleigh vibes were better.”

• “I decided to go solo this season—less drama, more dessert.”

Turn it into a game: Every time you deflect a nosy question with humor, reward yourself with an extra slice of pie.

Step 5: Embrace the Joy of Being Extra

Deck yourself out like the holiday queen you are. Glitter, bold lipstick, statement outfits—the works. Nothing screams “I’m doing better than fine” like showing up to the holiday party looking like the festive icon you were born to be.

When your ex’s mom sees your Instagram story? Let her know you’re thriving in HD.

Step 6: Use Holiday Chaos as a Distraction

Volunteer. Bake cookies for your neighbors. Host a “Single and Sassy” holiday brunch. Stay busy and keep your mind off the “what ifs”. The holidays are a perfect excuse to pour your energy into things (and people) that actually bring you joy. Bonus: You’ll walk into 2025 feeling accomplished AF.

Step 7: Make Peace with the Tears

Okay, real talk: The holidays can be rough. There might be a moment when you cry into your hot cocoa or get a little misty-eyed seeing couples skating hand-in-hand. That’s fine. Feel it, then remind yourself that this is just one chapter in your story—and the next one is fire.

Step 8: Toast to You

When New Year’s rolls around, forget resolutions about changing yourself. Raise your glass (or mug of spiked hot chocolate) to all the BS you’ve survived this year and the boss you’re becoming. Cheers to you, the star of this comeback story.

This holiday season, you’re not just surviving—you’re thriving, laughing, and maybe even dancing around your living room to Mariah Carey at full volume. Because the best revenge isn’t moving on—it’s living so fabulously that your ex starts regretting all their life choices.

You’ve got this, babe. Now, go slay the holidays!

#breakup #healing journey #inspiration #positive mental attitude #glow up #encouragement #self care #holiday

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auroralix · 1 year ago

Text

✩ fairly odd christmas - part 2 ✩

read parts one and three here!

pairing: chanlix. this is still chanlix. this will always be chanlix.

summary: single and lonely on christmas, felix makes an offhand wish to have someone to love. the man who appears in his kitchen the next morning to make that wish come true is the last thing he expects.

song: fictional ~ khloe rose

this section’s word count: 5.6k

warnings: i don’t think there are many ?? ummmm the boys(tm) are in love so if you’re homophobic gtfo, the tiniest bit of angst if you squint bc felix is insecure, also felix is still thirsty he’d like some water pls

small a/n: part two! i highly recommend reading part one before this as this will make more sense. i have part one linked above (: also i’m still in the process of editing this, which i’m going to focus on once all parts are written and posted

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

The next several days passed without much excitement, much to Felix’s relief. The time consisted of both Chan and Felix learning to love with each other and become more comfortable in their shared space.

Felix took an extra day off work to help Chan settle in more before having to return and leave the spirit at home. He felt horrible the day after when he had to leave Chan and go back to work, but he knew it was for the best.

During the day, Felix went to work and sat at a desk and dreamed about clocking out and going home to the man waiting for him. He was mildly embarrassed to admit just how quickly Chan had worked his way into Felix’s heart, but the damage was done, there was no going back to how he was before.

Chan was the sweetest person Felix had ever met, he was convinced of it. Yes, he hadn’t known the other very long at all but there was no way anyone else could even compete. All of Felix’s past loves were shadows in comparison to the beacon of light that found himself in the center of Felix’s life.

With anyone else, he would’ve been scared he was moving too fast and getting himself in too deep. He and Chan had spoken about it, made it clear from their first day together that Chan was there to fill Felix’s lovesick heart the way he craved so intensely. And he had, he was there when Felix woke up, came home from work and went to sleep.

That wasn’t to say he catered himself completely to Felix’s every desire. He had his own little quirks that endeared him to Felix even more, one of those being his ability to Christmas-ify any and every room he walked into on a whim.

Felix couldn’t believe his eyes his first day home from work to see his apartment decked out in Christmas decor. Little baubles had been placed here and there and paper garlands were strung across the apartment. His sad little Christmas tree he’d put up in the corner had been completely transformed into a glowing masterpiece, just the same as the sad little tree in “A Charlie Brown Christmas” had been. And to top it all off, the whole apartment smelled like fresh cookies.

Felix didn’t know if spirits were allowed to marry, but if they were, he would’ve proposed on the spot.

His apartment had never felt quite as much like a home as it did once Chan aggressively redecorated, making the apartment look like a scene straight out of a cheesy Christmas movie. It was a bit overboard, but Felix didn’t have the heart to say so when he saw the utterly joyful expression coloring Chan’s face.

Christmas was his favorite time of year but he hadn’t properly celebrated Christmas in too long. The most he’d done was put up a tree and maybe some lights on his apartment balcony as he had been by himself every Christmas since college. He was grateful for Chan coming in and springboarding him right into the Christmas spirit.

Although the two of them were spending lots of time together outside of Felix’s work, their relationship hadn’t progressed farther than cuddling while watching a movie or falling asleep. They had time and while Felix was more than happy to let his inner monologue go crazy over Chan, he didn’t want to jump into anything more physical until they’d been on a few dates at least.

One of those dates Felix had been planning for some time, or at least a couple hours while he was supposed to be working.

Chan had a penchant for cookie baking that nearly put Felix’s brownie skills to shame; he’d made large batches of the tasty treats in three different variations since arriving in Felix’s kitchen almost a week ago. And while Felix figured a lot of people would get tired of the baked goods constantly covering his counters in different little tins Chan found, he was not one of those people. Felix had a notorious sweet tooth that could rival that of a five year old’s so he wasn’t complaining by any means.

It had sparked an idea for their first official date, a metaphorical bulb lighting up above Felix’s head when the thought popped into his brain. An ad had popped up while scrolling through TikTok for a shop where people could decorate their own Christmas cookies. As soon as he saw it, he knew it was the perfect place to bring Chan.

He made a reservation for the next night, barely able to contain his excitement and stop himself from spoiling the surprise to Chan when he got home.

“Someone’s happy,” Chan commented when Felix came home hours later. He was in the kitchen, absentmindedly stirring something on the stove and the smell immediately made Felix’s stomach grumble in interest.

Felix hummed, nodding and making his way over to Chan so he could peek over his shoulder at the pan on the stove.

“How’d you know?”

Chan gave Felix a dimply smile before shrugging. “It’s just one of those things.”

“You say that, but I have the feeling it’s another one of your little powers you haven’t mentioned yet.”

Chan just shrugged again, smile still on his face as he looked back to the pot of pasta on the stove. “It might be, you never know.”

Felix groaned and shook his head. “Why can’t you just tell me?”

“Where’d the fun be in that?” Chan giggled, wiggling his hips slightly in a way that made him look like more an excited, oversized puppy than the powerful spirit he was.

And if Felix’s heart didn’t skip a beat or three at the sight.

“Okay, fine, don’t tell me. You’re lucky you’re cute,” Felix grumbled quietly, hardly realizing the words that were leaving his mouth before they tumbled out.

Moments later, a soft squeaking noise came from Chan’s general direction as he tried not to choke on his own spit.

“Y-You… you think I’m cute?” Chan’s words were hushed, his tone disbelieving.

Felix felt his brain stop for a second as it caught up with his words before nodding quickly, unable to help the adoring little smile growing on his face. “I- I, um, yeah, I really do.”

Chan’s own shy smile mirrored Felix’s, his face flushing a bright shade of pink as he looked back at the pot of pasta. “I- uh, o-oh wow, would you look at that, the food’s done. Do- do you want a bowl?”

Felix nodded once again and went to retrieve two bowls for Chan and himself. He chose to ignore Chan’s blatant subject change after being complimented for the time being. Instead, he decided to bring it up later when the other didn’t seem quite so flustered and was less likely to burn himself on the hot surfaces he was surrounded by.

Chan hurried through serving Felix and then himself, keeping his head ducked to try and hide his reddened face the whole time. He offered Felix an awkward, sheepish giggle, waddling into the other room without another word.

Felix shook his head and followed Chan into the other room, fond smile dancing on his lips as he looked after the other. He settled down on the couch next to Chan, not at all thinking about the way their knees lightly rested against each other as he pushed the pasta around in his bowl.

“So, um, I was thinking we could go out tomorrow night,” he began after a moment. “One of my days off from work is tomorrow and we haven’t been on an actual date yet.”

He looked up from his bowl to once again find Chan beaming at him, dimples etched deep on either side of his mouth, the embarrassment from earlier long forgotten. Felix had the fleeting thought run through his mind that he’d never seen someone as beautiful as the man sitting opposite him. The thought was quickly followed up by another right after of how lucky he was to be faced with that bright smile everyday. And to be the cause of it so often made him feel wholly unworthy.

Chan was the sun, and Felix was a simple sunflower, greedily basking in the warmth of the other’s gaze.

It had only been a few days and already, Felix was unsure how he’d made it this far without the Christmas fairy in his life.

“You want to go on a date?” Chan asked, his voice snapping Felix out of his daze and back to the present.

Felix blinked at Chan dumbly a couple times before nodding and giving the other a small smile in return. “That’s part of why you’re here, right? So we can do cute couple things together?”

“Well, yeah, but I wasn’t sure if you actually wanted to-“

“Channie,” Felix interrupted, scooting closer and putting his face in front of Chan’s so he couldn’t escape his gaze. He also refused to think about how quickly and easily that little nickname slipped out of his lips. “Why would I not want to go out with you? I haven’t known you for a very long time, but I do know that you’re kind, funny, the best cookie maker in the whole world, and quite possibly the hottest person I’ve ever met. I want to take you out and make you smile and let everyone be jealous that someone as amazing as you would be with someone like me.”

Sometime during his short speech, Felix’s hand had found its way to rest on Chan’s arm. And once Felix realized, he kept his hand where it was, secretly enjoying the feel of Chan’s arm under his hand.

Not that Chan had noticed, his face red and eyes wide as he stared back at Felix.

“Really?” he said quietly, tone unsure. “Y-You mean it?”

Felix gave Chan the sweetest smile he could muster, the Christmas fairy deserved nothing less. “I mean every word.”

Chan let out a soft giggle, looking down at his hands for a brief moment. He looked up at Felix again, who had still not moved away from in front of Chan’s face. This time, his expression wasn’t shy, it was the exact opposite. Chan’s full lips were quirked up in a cocky smirk and one of his eyebrows was raised as he gazed at Felix, who suddenly felt much too warm and too close to the other.

“So, you think I’m hot, huh?” Sadly for Chan, his façade lasted only until the end of that sentence, after which he immediately broke down into embarrassed giggles. He set his half eaten bowl of pasta down on the end table next to him and sunk into the corner of the couch, covering his face with both arms. Tiny, distressed groans and squeaks could also be heard coming from Chan’s general direction.

Felix just sat in his spot for a few seconds too long, his entire face now a deep shade of red to match Chan’s. He let out a nervous giggle of his own, trying not to think too hard about how his stomach was in knots over seeing that new, albeit short lived, side of Chan.

He didn’t know what he was going to do with the sweet, and apparently sometimes feisty, Christmas spirit that had found himself a staple in Felix’s life faster than he’d ever admit.

•••

The next evening couldn’t arrive fast enough.

For Felix, it was torture trying to keep the idea for his date a secret from Chan. And for Chan, it was torture as he followed his human around all day trying to guess what the date could be.

But eventually, it was nearing time for them to head out so they didn’t miss their reservations at the cookie shop.

Felix had told Chan to wear comfy clothes that he didn’t mind getting dirty which was a struggle for Chan as he loved his new, nearly all black wardrobe he’d picked out with Felix the week before. He didn’t want to get any of his new outfits messy, but after much reassurance from Felix that they could be washed, he settled on a set of clothes and the two headed out.

From the moment they walked into the shop, Chan had gone quiet, gazing at the rows of cookies waiting to be decorated in wonder. Felix just followed him around, letting him look at the impressive spread of cookies, icings, and candy decorations they had to choose from. He couldn’t help but smile fondly every time Chan came bouncing up to him, rambling about another type of cookie he just had to decorate and take home.

“Which ones do you want to start with first, Chan?” Felix asked after they started their third lap around the store.

“I- I don’t know, they all look so good,” Chan replied with a slight huff.

“Well, we can decorate a few to begin with and come back for more after. You don’t have to decide on everything right now.”

The smile Chan gave Felix in return was blinding, immediately bounding back to the front of the store so he could start collecting the cookies he wanted.

As he followed Chan around, Felix began to realize just how much he underestimated the amount of energy the spirit truly had. It took another three turns around the shop before Chan was ready to sit down and decorate. To Felix though, the slight twinge in his feet from so much walking was worth it to see Chan’s face permanently lit up with joy.

Another thing that quickly became apparent to Felix was just how skilled Chan was when it came to decorating. They’d barely sat down and already Chan was spreading out the cookies he picked out and icing them to near perfection. He held the little piping bottles expertly, concentrating on filling in every little gap with the colorful frosting.

Felix, on the other hand, was struggling a little more. He’d picked out some cookies for himself and though he considered himself somewhat skilled as a baker, it was clear that talent did not translate over into decorating. While Chan could create the most wonderful little pictures with frosting, Felix was just happy to complete a sad little stick-like snowflake on one of his cookies.

After multiple failed attempts to pipe out a Christmas tree that didn’t look like a blob, Felix huffed in defeat and slumped back in his chair.

“Is it like, a Christmas fairy requirement to just be amazing at cookie decorating?” he asked, looking enviously at the little murals Chan was painting next to him.

Chan shrugged, not looking up from the cookie he was now decorating with tiny candies. “Not necessarily, I’ve- I’ve just always liked it. I can let my creativity be free, you know?”

“I guess, but you’re so good at it, I don’t know how you manage to make every one of them look perfect so effortlessly.” Felix gestured to his tray of cookies with lumpy little pictures on them. “Mine look like they just got run over.”

“They’re not… terrible.”

Giving Chan an incredulous stare, Felix couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped his lips seconds later.

“What?” Chan asked, voice squeaky in confusion. “Mine just look this nice because I’ve had a couple more years to perfect my ways.”

“Oh sure, because that’s just practice.” Felix nodded again, wholly unconvinced. “Go back to your decorating and let me be jealous.” He waved a hand dismissively and turned his attention back down to the cookies on his tray. The little smilies he’d shakily drawn onto one cookie stared at him tauntingly, like they knew he tried to make them better but was completely incapable of doing so.

Felix scrunches his eyebrows into a frown and petulantly poked at the cookie, offended by its happiness when he was trying to sulk. From his side, he heard a snicker and whipped his head up to look at Chan. “Don’t laugh at my pain.”

“I’m not laughing, I promise!” Chan snickered again and flinched dramatically when Felix reached out to lightly smack at his arm.

“Yes you were! You think my lack of talent is funny.” Felix pouted, poking his lips out in a way he knew his friends and others had a hard time resisting. Chan was no exception to his ways.

“I’m sorry, I- I didn’t mean to upset you.” The smile was gone from Chan’s face, leaving him looking genuinely concerned.

Felix’s eyes widened as he realized what he’d done. Twice now since Chan came to him had Felix accidentally offended him. Scrambling to correct his error he rushed out, “No! No, no, Channie, no. I’m not upset, I promise. I was just joking.”

Chan still didn’t seem horribly convinced at his words, and Felix once again felt like the worst person alive for making his Christmas fairy feel that way.

His Christmas fairy. Huh. That was new.

“I mean it, I’m really impressed by you and couldn’t create anything close to that. I- I say stupid things sometimes, so don’t listen to me, like, ever. I’m really sorry.” Without thinking, Felix reached a hand out to brush a couple stray curls off of Chan’s forehead. He didn’t miss the way Chan stilled at the move, the tips of his ears flushing a dark red.

“You really like my decorations?” His question was quiet, half unsure and half shy.

“I don’t just like them, I love them. Now, let me watch the master work and maybe I’ll pick up something.” Felix lightly poked Chan on the cheek, grinning when a small smile made its way back onto the other’s face.

“If you insist…” Hesitantly, Chan picked up a new cookie and piping bottle, beginning to work on his next design.

Felix just watched him work, sending the spirit encouraging nods every so often when he held up the cookie to show his progress. He smiled as Chan regained his confidence and momentum after a couple minutes, falling back into his decorating groove.

Some more time passed and Felix started to get restless. He’d handed over his undecorated cookies to Chan, letting him make them pretty in a way he never could but now he was left with nothing to do. Until Felix looked at the little bottles of icing laid out before him and suddenly, he had a very stupid idea.

He picked up one of the bottles of red icing and put a dollop on the paper plate in front of him. Felix stuck his finger in the frosting before turning back towards Chan and lightly poking his cheek. Chan stopped mid-frosting swipe, frowning slightly in confusion and a tiny, surprised giggle leaving his lips.

“What was that for?”

Truthfully, Felix had no real answer other than a simple, “Because I wanted to?”

Giggling once more, Chan looked back at him for a moment, seeming to have an internal conversation with himself. He set down the cookie and offset spatula he had been using to decorate and reached in front of Felix, dipping his finger in the frosting on Felix’s plate. Then, with a mischievous smile of his own, he booped Felix’s nose, leaving a smudge of red icing.

“There, now we match,” he announced proudly.

“I guess we do. But maybe I should just…” Felix trailed off, grabbing the bottle with the green icing and putting a dot on his finger. He glanced at Chan and, wiggling his eyebrows, smeared a line of the frosting along the top of his cheek, right above the initial spot he’d left.

Chan’s eyes widened and he reached for the blue frosting to repeat the action of swiping a line across Felix’s cheek. Felix laughed, going for another bottle of frosting.

“Maybe this is the decorating I’m good at,” he joked, making a couple dots on Chan’s other cheek. There was a distant thought in the back of his head that they shouldn’t be doing this with the frosting and they could get in trouble for it. But one look at Chan’s smiling, red face and Felix couldn’t find it in himself to care too much.

The two went back and forth for a couple minutes, sharing laughs and shy glances as their faces became more and more covered in the bright frosting. They probably received some weird stares but neither noticed, too wrapped up in each other to think about anything else.

“I hope this doesn’t stain,” Chan whispered, leaning in close to Felix like he was sharing a deep secret.

“If it does, too bad. At least we’ll both look silly,” Felix shrugged with another laugh. “We should probably try wiping it off soon though, I don’t want the owners to kick us out.”

Chan nodded and picked up one of the paper towels that laid untouched in a pile by their cookie trays. He focused once again on Felix, lightly swiping it over a spot of frosting on his chin.

“Hold still for me.” The soft tone of his voice made Felix freeze, heart thundering in his chest at all of Chan’s attention on him, his face so close. He took in every inch of Chan’s perfect face, the light freckles across his nose that couldn’t be seen from far away, the way his eyebrows furrowed as he realized, “Uh oh. Felix… it’s not coming off.”

Felix was so deep in his own mind he barely heard or registered the other’s words. When the words finally sunk into his brain, his eyes went wide. “Wait, really?”

Nodding once again, Chan sat back immediately, his eyebrows still scrunched together as he studied the streaks across Felix’s face. “I think we’re both gonna look weird for a while.”

“Oops?” Felix offered unhelpfully and scooted forward in his chair, reaching for a paper towel to try and wipe the color off Chan’s face in return. Chan stayed still, closing his eyes while Felix dabbed at his face. Sure enough, the layer of frosting came off, but not the colors of the dye underneath. His skin was lightly stained, the little dots and streaks Felix painted stayed right where they were.

Even with the mismatched colors all over him, Chan was still the prettiest person Felix had ever seen. He was sure, now more than ever, that nobody else on earth would ever change that.

“There we go, all done.”

Slowly, Chan’s eyes fluttered open, his gaze meeting Felix’s. Felix was sure time slowed down in that moment as he looked at the beautiful man in front of him, the world fading into static around them. They were so close but so far away, and all Felix could think about was closing the distance that separated them; a couple short inches and he’d have what he’d been dreaming of for what felt like forever.

But not here, not in this crowded shop. His Christmas fairy deserved better, his Christmas fairy deserved nothing short of the whole world.

Felix tore his eyes away from Chan’s, turning back to the discarded cookies beside them.

“We should- we should, um, go,” he muttered. “I’ll go pay and get a box for these, okay?”

Chan just blinked several times, seeming dazed for a second before he gave a hum in affirmation that he’d heard.

Minutes later, they were walking back home, and all either of them could think about was what had happened inside the shop. Felix didn’t like the silence that hung between them.

He hated it, actually. He couldn’t keep messing up like this, Chan deserved better.

Long minutes turned to quiet hours and all too soon, Felix was getting ready to sleep, Chan already in bed in the room next to him. They hadn’t said much, neither of them knowing how to broach the subject of earlier. They made small talk, ate dinner and watched a movie together.

Felix still climbed into bed, curling up on his side. Chan still wrapped his arm around Felix’s waist, pulling him against his chest. Things were a little weird, but wouldn’t be forever. They could handle a little awkwardness for a day or two.

Next time, Felix would get it right, he silently promised Chan, and himself, as Chan’s steady breathing slowly lulled him to sleep.

•••

Another thing Felix had quickly learned about the Christmas fairy was that he could not sleep. He didn’t know if this was a problem all Christmas spirits had, but it was clearly one that Chan struggled with. More nights than not, Felix would wake up at three am to find Chan gone, in the kitchen baking or making hot chocolate.

Tonight was one such night.

Felix had woken up to again find that Chan was no longer next to him and instead had went off to the kitchen, presumably. Normally, Felix would just stay in bed and fall back to sleep, but tonight was different. He felt a pull, like something was telling him he should get up and join Chan in his late night kitchen adventures. So, he dragged himself out of bed and trudged toward the kitchen.

It had been a few days since the Incident and they still hadn’t talked about it. Things had been awkward at first and it had taken some time, but a couple batches of baked goods later and everything didn’t seem quite as dire as it had before.

Felix wandered into the kitchen and was met with the sight of Chan’s bare back as he stood in front of the stove. While Felix preferred to wear his cute, warm pajamas at night, Chan opted to sleep in shorts; though he suspected the reason Chan bothered to wear anything at all was just to keep Felix from feeling uncomfortable. Not that he would’ve minded if Chan wore less, which was another thought he’d tried desperately to push to the back of his brain whenever possible.

Chan heard the quiet shuffling of Felix’s feet on the floor and turned toward him, offering him a slightly concerned look.

“Felix? Are you okay, what are you doing up?”

Felix just shrugged, because once again, he had no good answer for the Christmas fairy. “I- I noticed you were gone and wanted to check on you.”

To that, Chan smiled softly and turned back to the pot of hot cocoa in front of him. “I’m fine, just can’t sleep sometimes, you know?”

By now, Felix had made his way to stand next to Chan and was watching him stir absentmindedly. “I’ve noticed.”

Things were back to being awkward and Felix hated it.

He wanted to fix it and make things better but he didn’t know how. What was he supposed to say? “You know that really awkward moment a couple days ago? I was really close to kissing you because you looked so pretty but didn’t want to because it wasn’t the right time and you deserve better than that and-“

“Do you want some?” Felix was snapped out of his inward spiraling by Chan’s question.

“I- what?” He asked dumbly, his brain still not having caught up with the moment.

“The cocoa, do you want some? I can make more if you want any.” There Chan was, still smiling sweetly at him like Felix hadn’t been a huge idiot in every way since the first day he showed up. Felix truly didn’t deserve anyone like his Christmas fairy.

His Christmas fairy. Oh fuck, there it was again.

“Felix, are you sure you’re okay?” Chan was frowning now and reached out to feel his forehead with the back of his hand. “Are you getting sick?”

Upon Chan’s skin touching his, Felix’s brain kicked back into overdrive, making him back away quickly. “N-No! No, I’m okay, I’m sorry. My brain’s just been… elsewhere, I guess.”

Chan just tilted his head, giving him a long, considering look. Eventually he sighed and looked away. “I can hear you overthinking again.”

There really was no hiding from Chan with his Christmas-spirit-emotion-telling-thing he had. That didn’t stop Felix from panicking internally.

This was one half of the two things he hated about love. The confessing. He was a chronic over-explainer and always rambled on for too long and weirded the other person out with how much he talked. He couldn’t help it; when he fell, it was deep and hard and there was never any going back.

Not that he was falling for Chan, except that he definitely was.

“Please talk to me, Felix,” Chan said, his voice barely more than a murmur. “I know it’s about the other day, stuff has been weird ever since then.”

Felix took a deep breath. It was time to face his anxieties and be honest. This was Chan, his sweet, lovely Christmas fairy that made him hot cocoa in the middle of the night and looked at him like he hung the stars in the sky. He could tell Chan anything and would still receive that same smile that brightened his mornings and made his nights glow.

“About that,” he began, huffing out a sheepish laugh, “it’s stupid, really. I just- in the shop, you looked so, um, so pretty and I really wanted to kiss you but it wasn’t- it wasn’t the right time. I- I wanted to give you the perfect moment because you’re so amazing and- and you deserve something just as special.”

“Felix… why didn’t you tell me?” Some time during his stumbled explanation, Chan appeared in front of Felix, fixing him with such an earnest gaze that he was sure his legs nearly turned to jelly.

“I- I didn’t know how to. I was scared I’d messed up again and made things awkward and I didn’t want to make things worse.” Felix looked down, feeling a burning blush spread like wildfire across his face. Seconds later, a hand tilted his chin up and he was staring into Chan’s warm brown eyes. He was smiling faintly, his head tilted just slightly to the side with his dark curls falling across his forehead.

“What had you imagined?” He asked, voice barely above a whisper.

That took Felix aback. Truthfully, he hadn’t fully planned it out, but different scenes would float across his mind throughout the day. One minute, it was them ice skating, twirling around with each other; and the next, they were outside as the snow fell around them, glittering against the twinkle lights brightening the night.

He closed his eyes, and concentrated on the scene that appeared most in his brain.

“We’d go out, maybe we’d go ice skating, it’d be at an outdoor rink I know of. There are pretty Christmas lights hanging all around and it just feels so magical; we’d skate and maybe hold hands, I’d stress about having sweaty hands or tripping and falling on my face. We’d take a break for some hot cocoa before skating a little more and when the moment was just right, I’d turn toward you and ask before kissing you.” Felix’s eyes were still squeezed shut, wistful smile gracing his face.

And then there were two large hands cupping either side of his face and his eyes were flying open, once again meeting Chan’s searching gaze. He was close, so close. Felix’s breath caught in his chest as he gazed at the wondrous man in front of him. Mere inches separated them but it felt like a mile wide ravine.

“How attached are you to that idea?” Felix could feel Chan’s warmth breath on his face and his brain short-circuiting in response.

“N-Not very, anymore.”

“Then can I please kiss you?”

Unable to form words, Felix just nodded, closing his eyes once again as Chan leaned in. Softly, almost tentatively, Chan pressed his lips to Felix’s. They were soft, just as Felix had imagined, and he hurried to reciprocate, his hands coming up to gently rest on either of Chan’s sides.

It wasn’t like any other kiss Felix had ever experienced. With other people, it had been nice, wonderful, even. He’d tried to push himself to feel the fireworks spoken about in his favorite books and had never had anything close to that experience. But that wasn’t this either, there were no fireworks.

Instead, kissing Chan felt like coming home.

He felt like a warm hug on a cold day, reassuring and there. He was the sun after a long winter night and a refreshing swim in the middle of summer. This wasn’t the feeling Felix had dreamed of, but one so much better; one he hadn’t known he’d needed and now one he knew he’d never be able to live without again.

Moments passed and all too soon, Chan was pulling away, leaving Felix forever wanting more. He knew right away that he’d never be able to get enough of those kisses, of Chan himself.

Slowly, he opened his eyes, blinking at Chan with a slightly dazed smile.

Chan smiled back, always and forever looking at Felix like he held the world. “Was that okay?”

Felix couldn’t help but let out a soft giggle at the question. “That was the best kiss I’ve ever received.”

Chan’s beautiful, dimply smile grew ever wider as he started to lean in once more. “Then would you mind if I did it again?”

This time, Felix beat him to it, wrapping his arms around Chan’s neck and eagerly pressing his lips against Chan’s. Chan let out a small, surprised noise but still returned the kiss, fitting perfectly with Felix.

As he pulled Chan in closer, Felix couldn’t stop smiling. Finally, he had someone to love and someone who loved him just as much.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

read part three here!

#stray kids #chanlix #skz bang chan #bang chan #skz felix #felix #lee felix #skz fluff #fluff #love #i love them #wholesome content #christmas fairy #so many cookies #they’re in love your honor

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