#I’m definitely not projecting my father issue.

[circus-clangen]

Hi I’m a new circusclan enjoyer and I am SO confused on what’s happening. Can I get a rundown of the current lore we know? Or like links for me to understand because like who is marquee?? I read the moon updates how do I not know them. Also monkeypaw was only mentioned once I believe? What’s their deal??

You got it! I'm not planning on posting here until I finish the next moon--which most likely wont be until the new year, so it'll be nice to have this sitting at the top of my blog for a while! Here's the official Circusclan Lore rundown, including what happened in the moons, the lost moons, the puzzles, and the 10th ring of HELL that is the discord server: First, the starter cats: Ringstar--previously Ringtail of Heronclan, and brother of @echoes-in-echoclan 's Kestrelstar--and his two kits, Clownpaw and Tigerkit.

The pre-moon events: Ring left his clan and his brother to join the circus and be with a cat he met, named Goldmask. Suffient to say for now, Goldmask's treatment of Ring was less that ideal, but he loved her all the more. They had a son together, Clown. The birth was INCREDIBLY taxing on Goldmask, and almost killed her (detailed here https://www.tumblr.com/circus-clangen/768067551594987520/wait-if-goldmask-wasis-paralyzed-how-did-she?source=share). A little while later, Goldmask became pregnant again. Ring was there when one of the kits was born, and knew it was not his. Goldmask knew she would die in this kitting--she'd barely survived having one kit, and this time, she'd had two. Only, Ring never knew the second one existed, because it's father had stolen it away before Ring could arrive. Goldmask didn't make it, and Ring was left alone in the circus, with Clown and Tiger.

The lost moons: I wasn't intending for Circusclan to become a comic. This, coupled with some technical issues, means moons 1-5 were lost. The technical issues were caused because, around moon 3-4, Tigerkit was taken by an eagle and killed. I wasn't ready for her to die, so I went into the code and brought her back... only, something strange happened. Before her in-game death, she was definitively Ring's favorite child. So much so, that I made jokes about it to my friends. He LOVED her. But after she died--after I brought her back--he hated her. He hated her so *viscerally*. A non-secret about the clangen save behind this comic is that both Ring and Clown's hate stats for Tiger are COMPLETELY maxxed. I knew I had to do something with this lore-wise, which I've detailed here (https://www.tumblr.com/circus-clangen/769542088687747072/anything-youre-dying-to-share-3?source=share). Monkeypaw: In a tale I've yet to reveal, Monkeypaw left Heronclan with Ring, but not long after, became the Starclan guide for my clan. The reason you don't see much of him is some lore I've added. There's a lot to it, but the basics of it is that Monkeypaw is only remembered by Ringstar--none of the ever living cats have met him, and so he can't directly interact with him. Unfortunately, Ringstar's connection with Starclan right now is akin to an Internet Explorer browser windows connection to the internet. So, Monkeypaw is a somewhat abstract figure for now. Marquee: Marquee is the father of Tigertoe and the mystery Tigersibling. He's Goldmask's other mate--one Ringstar didn't know existed until Tiger's birth. A staple of Circusclan is the cats affinity for human culture, and their imitation of it. Unknown to them, Marquee was "there first". He's from an almost cultlike group of cats that have been trying to not only imitate, but steal, humanity, for many many years. It's unclear as of now which of his actions are on behalf of this unnamed group, and which are on behalf of his deceased mate Goldmask. Moons 6-14: These moons were drawn when Circusclan was a fun meme project for me to share with my friends. I had no intention of posting it on Tumblr, much less giving it this level of lore. You CAN glean some lore from these wretched posts, but most notable in this era, is the infamous "hide and seek game", in which the player's failure to correctly solve a puzzle (https://www.tumblr.com/circus-clangen/746608261062639616/you-have-successfully-determined-that-ringstar?source=share) left Ringstar trapped in a burning caravan--the blaze implied to be set by Marquee. The players decided to let him burn, and he lost five lives. Moons 13-18: By this point, Tigertoe got the patrol event where a secret, outside-clan mate joins the clan: Trapezetangle. Also by this point, an outside-clan apprentice named Whippaw joins. Moon 19: I forgor Moon 20: The Experimental Era of video moons that were SUPER fun to make but took my entire life so I'm not going to be doing them every moon. Some people expressed they weren't comfortable watching a scary video, so the rundown of moon 20 is this: Ringstar died again, and Tigertoe found out she was pregnant. (For a rundown of that whole mess of a puzzle, look here: https://www.tumblr.com/circus-clangen/761426559722782720/i-try-my-best-to-never-explain-my-puzzles-even-if?source=share) Moon 21: Present day! Horrible things are going to happen very soon <3 Present, currently-alive (or dead) characters that we're AWARE of, even if I haven't properly revealed them: Monkeypaw, Ringstar, Tigertoe, Tigersibling, Clownwish, Goldmask, Marquee, Trapezetangle, Whippaw Nicknames you should be aware of for clarity: Dave is Marquee. The discord server will only call him Dave. His name is Marquee. Please help. Hope this helps at least some!

[supernova41st]

What about the mercs with a fem SO that talks in brainrot sometimes? Would really want medic in there but it's up to you!

Mercs x Brainrot!Reader

A/n: WHY IS THE TF2 FANDOM SO OBSESSED WITH THIS IDEA? 😭 I SAW ANOTHER FIC ABT THIS AND TWO REQUESTS ASKING FOR THIS PLS

warnings: Brainrot.. a lot of images being used, it’s a shit post who cares tbh

Scout

He’s into it too

Guys it’s scout

“Scout ilysm ur so nonchalant <33”

“Thanks babe ^^ I know I’m pretty alpha”

(Oh btw the alpha thing isn’t a joke he unironically listens to alpha male podcasts)

In the middle of spy’s serious moments you’d both lip sync ‘you are my sunshine’ to each other when he’s not looking

“what the bloody hell are you guys doing..”

“…perhaps itz a coping mechanizm zince scout doesn’t have a father?”

Medic really had to take it there

The ‘fatherless child’ meme was a coping mechanism for him tho

“I’m a fatherless child, of course I have abandonment issues”

“Um babe? Idk if you should joke abt that 😚”

“Na it just makes me more sigma”

You guys love to fuck with the blu team sm with your shenanigans, esp sniper!!

Scout would have his bat and you would have whatever weapon you have with you and yell “skibidi” before jumping him

Here’s something he DEFINITELY didn’t learn from you 💯

creds to urwhouchoose2b on Tik tok

Engineer

He tries so hard to understand

Whenever you show him a meme he does the classic old person holding phone away from eyes thing

Yk the

“Ok so this is the ‘im nothing like y’all’ fish”

“alrighty, and this is..?”

“Oh that’s the Freddy five bear meme, see it’s funny cuz his name is actually ‘Freddy fazbear’ but they got his name wrong so like.. yeah”

“…I’m not sure what I’m ‘posed to say ‘bout this, but I think you belong in a looney bin”

Once he had a project that had the word “alpha” in it and he hated mentioning it to you cuz yk

“giggle”

“…what?”

“Skibidi alpha”

“What??”

Demo man

HE LOVES IT LMFAOO

he’s so energetic esp when he’s drunk so he’s happy to have someone he can share that energy with

Y’all know that “Scotland forever” meme

Well you screamed it after another victory as a joke, but when demo heard it he was confused but also excited?

“SCOTLAND FOREVAA”

“OH? ALRIGHT THEN, SCOTLAND FOREVER 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿”

cut to him butt chugging beers

Demo doesn’t get it but he has the spirit

He’ll be right there replicating the TikTok audios after taking the point

Dude is drunk 99% of the time so he’s never bothered to ask what any of this means, he’s just in it for the fun

Once you dragged him to the bathroom since he drake too many beers (shocker) but he didn’t want to do it in the toilet cuz he didn’t want to ‘hurt his dear skibidi’

“Cmon demo you have to puke it out!!”

“Noo, take me to the jawbox I don’t wanna hert me skibidi toilet”

“Oh god what have I done”

I think you rotted his brain a little too much

Spy

Don’t even get him started.

He’s so sick of your antics it’s not even funny

“Guys we all have to remember that it’s not about the money.. it’s about the skibidi.”

Passionately grabs spy’s shoulder

“How have you made it this far in life”

Unlike engie, he really doesn’t want to know about it

Especially during missions

“lol spy you’re so devious ASF”

“shhh, enough blabbering!!”

“You are not carti 😶‍🌫️😶‍🌫️❌‼️‼️‼️”

You make fun of him a bunch, he can’t think of a single moment where you took him seriously

“Y/n get off the cart!!”

“If we were in Fortnite I’d have higher ground + double pump.”

[strazki]

School Bus Graveyard headcanons no one asked for but will still get 😤

Ashlyn has autism. Honestly pretty much canon at this point, considering what we've seen of her, but still

The whole group took a hot second to adjust, but they are now so accommodating to it

Obviously there's the noise issues, but they also recognize when she needs to be alone, and they don't bother her too much about her being so asocial

I’m projecting but I just love these guys

ANYWAY, on a completely different subject, I think Taylor is actually a really good singer! She's just very shy about it

I also think Aiden can definitely play drumset

Top that off with Tyler canonically playing guitar, all you need to do is give Ben a bass or something and then they're basically just a little band!

I think they would be called the Phantoms or some shit like that

Ashlyn can do backup vocals, and I love my boy Logan but he's giving stage manager vibes a little bit lol

Someone's gotta do it

Taylor and Tyler share their clothes all the time. We already see that they have the same room, which most likely means the same closet, and since the two of them have a relatively similar build (and thus, similar clothing sizes), they just don't really bother separating their clothes (probably why they're matching so often)

Aiden does so much stupid rich kid shit. Not obnoxiously, but just out of a lack of understanding

Probably says some shit to the others like "Wait, your parents didn't get you a car? I know we can't drive yet, but you can still like... take pictures with it."

Bro has no idea he's that rich

The twins absolutely love going over to Ashlyn's place to get self-defense training from Mike and Emma. With their father being gone for a while, and their mom being not all there (for lack of a better description), it's been a long time since they've had a stable parental figure in their lives

Ashlyn's parents are just so nice to them and treat them like their own kids. I just think it's something they needed in their life that they found in an unexpected place :(

Ben loves to paint! He took up art and drawing ever since he lost his voice, and finds painting specifically very calming

He's been working on portraits for each of his friends that are all lying half-finished around his room

Even when he finishes them, though, he probably wouldn't show them for a while because he's quite nervous about it

If he DOES show them, he would definitely give Taylor her's first, because that's who he feels closest to

She cries

I feel like Logan, with working at the flower shop and all that, probably spends a bit of time putting together little bouquets for his friends

Not as like a grand show of affection, but just little gifts to show his appreciation for them being around and caring about him

Probably personalizes them a LOT too. Not only does he coordinate them to match the favorite colors/flowers of the person he's making them for, but he knows all the symbolic meanings behind each flower

Like, for example, I bet he gets yellow roses for Ben to signify friendship, and pink roses for Ashlyn to signify gratitude, that sort of stuff

His love language is gift giving and he's never had friends as close as these guys, leave him alone >:[

Okay that's all I got right now send tweet

[bengiyo]

Love for Love's Sake Ep 6 Stray Thoughts

Last time, we picked up with the boys’ date, and things took a turn when Myunha wanted to avoid an interaction with his mom in her café, and then the amusement park was closed. Myungha also disappointed Yeowoon by telling him they were just friends. Later, Myungha soundly rejected Sangwon, and then further disappointed Yeowoon by telling him to love someone else instead. Thankfully, Shi-a teamed up with Yeowoon and is rooting for him. Myungha had to save 3,000,00 won, and learned that Yeowoon is being abused by an older male relative (perhaps his father). Thankfully, Kyunghoon is excited about his boyfriend coming back from Canada, and this gave Myungha the push to face Yeowoon properly. We left on the two of them having their first kiss. Also, the game is glitching.

Yes! Give him kissing lessons! No more stiff kissing in BL! Lessons start immediately!

Episode 6: Love

I like that at least Myungha is interrogating the ethics of dating under these circumstances. Sure wish another show was doing that.

Yeowoon is so earnest. I love this boy. I can’t wait to see all of Shi-a’s advice.

Myungha cries after watching what sounds like a Godzilla-King Kong-zombie film! I love him!!

He is 18 and he wants to kiss! I feel that, Yeowoon!

Shi-a! You interrupted the date!

Now we have to make him an idol? I don’t know that Yeowoon wants that kind of scrutiny.

Yes, go on and kiss the boy!

I’m with Sangwon. This IG thing seems like a bad idea.

Oh shit! We’re glitching!

I like the big wave Yeowoon does when he sees Myungha now.

Okay, that street scene was cute.

Oh ho! Is the writer trying to reach Myungha inside of the game? How did he put him here in the first place?

It’s super trippy that Myungha can see these notices from the game.

I love the idea of a character rejecting fate in a game world where the options are predetermined by the designers.

Tae Myungha better not die!!!

My precious boy is being stalked, too? It’s always something, goddamn.

This dude really ran up and snatched Myungha’s phone. I’m glad Sangwon checked him on this behavior.

Oh, a breakup flashback. He’s bi, girls.

Yeowoon definitely thinks he just got invited over for a night of intimacy. I hope Myungha realizes that.

Ah, the classic cruel video game choice: choose which person you love to die.

That’s a good cliffhanger.

Things are starting to move really quickly with the plot. It works well because they show the game itself falling apart, like the devs are dealing with a project spiraling out because of too many player choices to accommodate. Throwing an element of major danger into the story narrows the field back to make the players focus on the biggest issue. I feel like there’s going to be a lot to discuss about the structure of this story when we’re done. I remain deeply-compelled.

[wrenreid]

Off Limits

Part Twenty-Seven

My freshman year of high school, I was put into a junior level government class. I was only in there because it was the only class that fit into my schedule other than ag classes I couldn’t have been less interested in. I didn’t talk much in the class because everyone was older than me, and they thought I was a kiss up because i always made good grades. I didn’t particularly love the class, but of course, I still did my work and did it well.

Toward the end of the year, we did a mock trial. We drew for positions within the trial, mr flynn the judge. I drew attorney.

The case was a business lawsuit, I was the lawyer who was going against the business for their supposed cruel acts.

Mr. Flynn told us that we would receive extra credit if we dressed up, so me, a fourteen year old with a desperate need for academic validation, borrowed one of my mother’s pencil skirts and a suit jacket from my dad. I looked like a mini Aaron Hotchner, even my mom said so.

I remember preparing for the trial for at least a week, being a little excited about the project. I wanted to win the case, especially since I was, as I believed, on the right side of the law.

My opposing attorney was Noah Kincaid. He was a smart but cocky kid who also cared about winning the trial.

I remember standing up from my desk when is was my turn to ask questions to the kid under oath. I felt as though I had stepped into myself for the first time. It was just a mock trial that lasted half an hour, but I felt proud and confident. I was good at it.

Mr. Flynn pulled me aside after class and told me I should consider law school in the future. He said, and I quote, “The way you handled yourself was the most confident and concise I’ve ever seen in a student. You surprised me, Hotchner.”

I didn’t take it to offense that he said my skills surprised him. In his defense, he’d only heard me talk when I turned in a paper or answered a question, which the latter was usually rare since I didn’t particularly like to “show off” in front of juniors who already thought I was a kiss ass.

I did, however, take his first sentence as a compliment. I was confident and my statements and questions were concise.

I smiled, nodded, thanked him, then left. A lawyer was not on my top five career choices at the time. I didn’t want people to think I was doing it because of my father. I was definitely not. But after some research and a few binge watches of crime shows, I knew I actually did want to be an attorney. Not because of my father but almost in spite of him.

My dad quit his job as a lawyer and took the job Agent Gideon offered him at the BAU. I resented him for it, still do, but that’s besides the point. He wasn’t around much in my most influential years, and at fourteen, I decided I would be a lawyer, and if I happened to have a family, I wouldn’t take a new job that prevented me from being there for them.

So now, I’m currently four weeks away from grad school and three years away from the BAR. And I’m going to rock the shit out of them both. Because I can and because I’m determined. It’s also way less about my unresolved daddy issues now than it was in high school and even some of college, it’s a dream of mine.

Spencer has made it his mission to make sure I enjoy the last month of summer as much as I can. He’s taken me out on a million dates like picnics, movies, late night drives around the city and out into the country, and more every chance he gets between cases.

At least now we don’t have to sneak around and lie about our relationship. Though I was prepared to keep this from my dad for however long necessary, I’m pretty glad we accidentally outed ourselves at my graduation dinner.

My dad cooked a big meal for me, some family, friends, and we invited the team too. Spencer and I didn’t even sit near each other. We barely talked the whole dinner just to be safe.

But as love-sick, horny couples do, when we saw an opportunity to take a minute alone, we did just that.

Having your father catch you making out with a guy will never not be awkward, but when the guy happens to be his employee, it’s fucking weird.

Though, I will say, the look on his face was priceless. I’ve hardly seen him have that much emotion on his face.

After a very awkward, flushed-face, and stuttered explanation from Spencer and me, we were able to calm my father down. He was a lot more excepting than I expected; I think he finally realized he can’t dictate my life, and he saw how happy we are together.

The rest of that dinner consisted of a lot of teasing from Derek Morgan, my brother being grossed out by me having a boyfriend, and everyone asking about law school.

I’m excited and anxious to start the rest of my life as a law student. I’ve prepared for this for nearly 8 years now, and I���m getting closer and closer to my dream career. It’s terrifyingly exciting. I’m grateful to have my family and Spencer by my side through all of this.

hey, so this is it for this story! this is also most likely it for my fanfiction in general.

and for a little life update: i started college a month ago, and i’m adjusting to my new life which has been interesting and scary and fun. im also in a healthy relationship and have been for a while which has been pretty amazing. i hope all my mutuals/ readers are doing well. thank you guys for sticking around :)

tags: @pauline5525mgg @theintimatewriter @lilibet261 @greysviolets @jazzymariexoxoc @one-sweet-gubler @thatsonezesty13 @necromaniackat @awhoreforspencerreid @sebs-oxygen @scarredelirium @bts-sugaplum @awesomeness1679 @preciousbabypeter @yazzyu @cynbx @r3idsp3ncer @1010lizz @tiredbut-here @skulzombiw @lena-1895 @eevee0722 @shakespear-picaso-lovechild @daydreamingqueen1 @regulus-black-223048 @virginmusicloverr36 @jazzerbelle14 @kylakins88 @f-me-reid @lovejules888 @marimorena06 @daph-421 @idkusername8787

[moonlight0934]

Growing Pains

Damian sighs as he stares at the homework in front of him. He’s been sitting and staring at it for almost an hour. He’s far too smart for these stupid projects they give him, but now he can’t seem to do anything with it. Normally he’d have it done in ten minutes then move on, but nothing is making sense.

Someone knocks on his door, and he immediately perks up. Tim opens the door even though Damian didn’t actually tell him he could. Tim looks sad though he’s masking it with a small smirk. Damian can see it in his eyes. Damian settles back into his chair.

“You’re not who I was expecting.”

Tim sighs, the smirk slipping off of his face.

“Yeah, I know. That’s actually why I’m here. I know that Dick was supposed to pick you up, but he’s not coming. He said he got caught up at work, and he’s not going to make it down here.”

Damian knows that he looks hurt, but he doesn’t wipe the emotion off of his face.

“But I was supposed to stay with him this weekend. How does getting caught up at work today stop that entirely?”

Tim walks into Damian’s room, shutting the door behind him.

“I’m going to be completely honest, baby bat, it doesn’t. Everyone is downstairs trying to figure out what to say to convince you that he was being completely honest. That’s why I came up here before they could come up with something. Not to say that you would have believed them, but you deserve my honesty if nothing else. Dick isn’t coming because he got in a fight with Bruce yesterday, and they’re both being stubborn.”

Damian looks down at his feet.

“What does that mean?”

Tim walks over to Damian, then puts a hand on his desk, leaning against it.

“It means that we’re caught up in a lot of things that have nothing to do with us. You need to understand that Dick is trying to get some distance from Bruce, and by extension, us. That’s going to cause normal growing pains, but that’s not what this is.”

“Growing pains?” Damian asks, sniffling.

He looks up, making eye contact with Tim for the first time.

“Yeah, that basically just means sometimes it’s hard, but as you grow up, things change. You can have emotional growing pains too, just like you can have physical ones.”

“Ok, and if that’s not what this is, then what is this?”

“This is us getting caught in the middle of a blowout fight about something stupid. You’ve seen the way Dick, Jason, and Bruce fight. It’s normally a lot of repressed feelings, and stupid arguments. That’s why it feels like being abandoned when this kind of thing happens. Not everyone is going to treat you like that, but they never figured out how to handle their emotions. Especially towards each other, and it’s hurting other people.”

“Everyone won’t treat me like that?”

“No, I promise they won’t. There will be normal issues, but it won’t look like this. This comes with the curse of being in this family. We are the definition of a nuclear family, and there’s nothing that you and I can do to make that better. Just know that no matter what happens, I will be here.”

“I’m being punished for Father and Grayson’s inability to talk like adults?”

“They’re not doing it to punish you. They’re not trying to hurt you, but yes.”

“But you’re not going to do that? Even if you leave, it’ll just be the normal pains of growing apart?”

Tim nods.

“Yeah, I mean, I have no intention of leaving right now. However, when I do, this kind of thing won’t happen. I take my word very seriously, and I care about our relationship even if it has been rocky. You’re my brother. Even though I’d throw you out of a window given the chance, I will always be here for you if you need me. Now, with that said, get dressed.”

“Why? Grayson isn’t coming.”

“Yeah, I know. We’re not going to Dick’s apartment. Hurry up and get dressed, then meet me outside. Just don’t get caught by one of the others.”

Damian nods, though he still looks confused. Tim walks back out, shutting the door behind himself. Damian gets dressed quickly, pulling on casual clothes since he doesn’t know where they’re going. Just to assure that he doesn’t run into any of his family, he ends up climbing out of his window, and walking around the house to the front. Tim is standing out front, swinging his keys on his finger while he stares off into space.

“Drake, where are we going?” Damian asks as he walks up.

“You’ll see. Come on, get in my car.”

He climbs into the passenger seat while Tim climbs into the driver seat. The drive is quiet aside from Tim softly singing. Damian recognizes that he’s singing in French, but not what song it is. Damian watches him the entire ride, not really sure what’s going on. Eventually they stop in front of a building that Damian immediately recognizes.

“We’re going to the new art exhibit that I wanted to see?” he asks, forcing the excitement out of his voice.

Tim nods.

“Yep, the reason why no one would take you was cause Dick said that you were going to go before heading back to his apartment. He’s not coming, so I’m not making you wait any longer. We’re going to look at all of the art, and discuss art styles and photography.”

Damian nods, and he follows Tim inside. He still seems timid as he follows Tim through the gallery. Tim gives him a small smile, the sadness back in his eyes. They walk slowly through the gallery, chatting. The further through they get, the more they both relax. By the time they’re done, they’re both having a good time, and chatting about Tim’s interest in photography growing up.

“I had a nice camera cause my parents tended to throw money at me instead of actually paying attention to me. So I actually learned a lot about how positioning and lighting affects the photos.”

“That’s interesting. Do you think you could teach me?” Damian asks, getting quiet again. He looks a little nervous.

“Of course I can. I have a pretty busy week, but we can plan for next weekend. It’ll be a bit of a longer process since I really don’t have a lot of time, so it won’t be super consistent. However, you are a very quick study, so I don’t think you will have any issue learning no matter how horrible of a teacher I am.”

“You’re not a terrible teacher. I mean, your people skills do leave a lot to be desired, but I don’t think it makes you a bad teacher.” 

“Well, my people skills are terrible cause I have poorly managed autism. However, that’s not why I’m a bad teacher. I was a bad student too. While I am very smart, I have a hard time expressing what I’m thinking.”

Damian nods.

“Anyway, let’s head home.”

“Alright. Do you think Father is going to be mad at us for going out?”

“No, but he will be mad at me for telling you what was happening.”

Damian hums.

“You know Dick still loves you, right? He’s not trying to catch you in the middle of this, he just doesn’t know how to deal with it.”

Damian nods again.

“Yeah, I know he does. I’m not mad.”

“Alright. Now that we’re on the same team, we’ll have to face Bruce.”

Tim drives them home, but sends Damian up to his room immediately. He can vaguely hear Tim and Bruce talking, but he shuts his door so he doesn’t have to know what they’re talking about. He slips headphones on, and lets everything drift away. 

[miumiumandoodz]

Honestly, to me, romancing Owen is the most ultimate unrealistic fantasy. He has a stable business, unusually wealthy (possibly generational, since the business have been there since his father was young) and speaking of his father, apparently his saloon is stable enough that his parents can enjoy peaceful retirement somewhere. He’s a homeowner and his home is large enough to house a small family if that’s what you’re looking for. And this man is ACTUALLY kind, generous, compassionate, friendly, good natured, great listener, attentive to things (really keeps his saloon neat much to Grace’s chagrin). He’s handsome too, well build, physically so prime it’s impossible. Hot himbos like Justice and Unsuur are more realistic. It’s likelier that someone wealthy to be like Earnest. If I wanna have a Logan experience, I can just pop up to one of my straight girlie friend and listen to her talk about his hot but a bit unruly boyfriend who lives in a questionable situation because he’s pursuing a passion project that stems from his trauma and parental issues while she has to mom him emotionally. And we don’t talk about Miguel. A lot of Miguel types are borderline criminal and if you grow up in a very religious community, chances are you’ve heard or know someone like that. Some people be into that but not for me. Nope. BUT WHERE ARE THE OWENS??? WHERE??? They’re myth. They’re an illusion. They’re cryptids. There’s no way there’s a cis man like him. It’s impossible. Have you listen to all the girls and gays? No such account. That’s why to me he’s the fantasy. The elusive thing. The thing I’m pursuing. “Oh but he’s boring” EXACTLY. I want boring and safe romance. Romance that makes me think “yeah, I wanna spend the rest of my life cuddling at home with him” The world already sucks balls. Why would I want insecurities, discomfort, and more problems? I want a man like Owen. Life hard, Owen’s tiddy soft.

(Not mentioning Burgess and Pablo because while they almost has no flaws, they’re pretty realistic. Their only probable flaw is neurotypicals wouldn’t stand Burgess and Pablo definitely is not for straight anyone. Meanwhile, while writing this, I realized that the most unrealistic bachelor here is Pen. If you romance him, you’re probably the bravest in all of us)

[sagittarot]

🔥 Mars 🔥

Mars - known for aggression, motivation, conquest, acting on desire, sex, and stamina

One's mars sign can drastically influence the way they carry themselves, are seen, and impact personal relations and diplomacy. Mars is Energy.

❤️‍🔥 Mars aspecting Chiron can lead to wounds being healed through physical activity- such as martial arts. It should also be noted that it may also indicate particularly violent wounds, or wounds involving domineering men.

❤️‍🔥Mars in pisces need to learn to act on instinct. Decisions are made intuitively and felt through. Because pisces is co-ruled by Jupiter- luck tends to be on their side in accidents or conflict. The type to be in a serious car wreck without a scratch.

❤️‍🔥Mars in cancer are very moody individuals. They can be very shy in private, but project confidence in group settings. They claim to be loners, but I usually see them socializing and going with the mood of the crowd they’re in. Super sweet, but more on the guarded side of cancer placements.

❤️‍🔥Virgo mars have ANGER issues. The type to journal their darker feelings graphically. Think of constant bickering and debates as stimulating and engaging. PE teacher vibes.

❤️‍🔥Libra mars are by far the most charming libra placement I’ve encountered. They can really make everyone comfortable and smooth rough edges in their environment. The type to just shrug and go “this too shall pass” at high stress situations. Very loyal and old fashioned lovers. Their energy is directed towards unity.

❤️‍🔥Pisces mars genuinely need to have a hold on their escapist tendencies. I notice we’re either running from something or highly highly spiritual. Mediums fr tho.

❤️‍🔥 Gemini Mars 🤝 Arguing as a way to flirt

❤️‍🔥 Pluto-Mars aspects and their eternal struggle with control and power is real. You know they aren’t in a good place when they keep trying to death-grip everything in their lives.

❤️‍🔥Saturn-Mars and needing to build up tension

❤️‍🔥 Mercury-Mars and the voice *chefs kiss* ���🏻

❤️‍🔥 5th house mars 🤝 being addicted to high risk activities.

❤️‍🔥 Mars in 1st house can appear to always be injured/ in accidents. Commonly seen for the first time with casts and braces. Athletic. Also prone to arguing about themselves. “I’m not like that at all!” “my leg is fine! Just leave me alone, I can handle myself!” Etc

❤️‍🔥 Capricorn mars is NOTORIOUS for their waiting. I’m not saying they don’t take action (they DEFINITELY do and BOLDLY) but it’s more structured when they do. When they move, they make it so NOTHING can disrupt their foundation. They’re slow and steady FS. Very respectful of lover’s boundaries in my experience.

❤️‍🔥 Mars in 2nd house constantly argue about their worth, fortune, and their structure. Sign will color how this plays out. My mom has Aries mars in 2nd house- always arguing with people ab money, her values, eating habits, etc. my father also has mars here- but it’s Virgo, and he will debate about giving away his money, debate values, etc. he tends to be less aggressive than my mother in this house.

❤️‍🔥 Mars in 7th literally HAVE to argue with their partners. I don’t know why. They get really upset when their partners don’t argue back. They really like bratty banter.

❤️‍🔥 10th house mars 🤝 arguing with authority figures

❤️‍🔥 Mars-moon hard aspects have a hard time balancing their emotional reactions, and tend to have very impulsive responses to stimuli.

❤️‍🔥 Mars in detriment or fall signs tend to have lower energy levels and aren’t necessarily motivated to act easily.

❤️‍🔥 Mars in water signs and houses can and will be angry if those around them are. Very reflective lol. Also the type to get hype/motivated when in a crowd. Probably loves mosh pits tbh. Hard for them to release that emotion.

❤️‍🔥 Mars-Venus are charming individuals, often making peace during war, but can sometimes take out their angers and frustration on their closer friends and lovers. Could also just find conflict with social relationships.

❤️‍🔥 Mars Opposite Jupiter (cap mars) can be VERY quick. For some reason he wanted to edge himself??? Literally went in and exited immediately.

❤️‍🔥 EVERY Sagittarius Mars i have met was so funny and sooo nerdy. 10/10 my Sag Venus falls SO hard for this mars sign (esp bc its in my 5th house). Most around my age have aspects to pluto, which is very hot omg. In true fire mars fashion,(in an unserious and joking tone) i have been told by this placement, "I don't want to share you," and that they would flip off anyone checking me out.

[pupmkincake2000]

Speaking about that "found family" thing I hear too often now in this fandom... There seems to be an implication that romantic relationships cheapen a bond, or a story, or a character, and I honestly really resent that. Especially with DBH.

Found family is one of my favorite tropes, but can your partner not be your family? Is your partner not your friend, your confidant, and the person that helps you heal and uplifts you? Those things aren’t locked to just platonic or familial relationships. In terms of HankCon,

I think their story is one of the best examples of healing. Hank has lost everything to androids, he hates them and the world. Until you have Connor, who comes into his life and not only helps save the Android race but Hank too. He becomes his friend, his partner in crime (literally), and in my opinion, his romantic partner that loves him in all his flaws and pain.

I think a man falling in love with an Android, after having so much pain and hatred toward them, and having THAT person be the one to heal and love him. It’s a beautiful story and it’s unfortunate it gets so little respect in some areas of this fandom.

The most interesting part is also that people who are usually against HankCon, they seem like the ones who are applying their personal feelings and issues to the characters.

They’re so desperate for Hank to see Connor as his son that they’re willing to ignore actual, thought out theories and interpretations; as well as harass and bully those who see them as romantic. They take it as a person offense and that’s weird. Maybe they’re the ones who have “daddy issues” (because it is the strongest argument they usually use against shippers) since they need Hank to be Connor’s dad so badly.

I, personally, don’t need another father. I don’t want Hank to be my father or see him that way. I’m an adult who sees these two other adults as romantic.

I mean I’m not saying EVERYONE who hates HankCon wants Hank to be his dad, but the ones who are strongly Anti-HankCon and will beat you down teeth and nail… it does seem a bit odd, and I do feel like there might be some projection there. Even in other fandoms where people INSIST on platonic/familial relationships between two characters that aren’t, I wonder about this same thing. Definitely a pattern I’m noticing, especially since a lot of the platonic/familial people seem to be on the younger side.

[gennyanydots]

All Hail the Heartbreaker

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x f!reader

Masterlist

Warning: this part is angsty as fuck. High school Jake is straight up a manipulative asshole.

Part 1 of 3

Part 2

Part 3

Just his name could send your mind reeling and cause your breath to quicken. It always felt like an out of body experience.

He had known exactly what he was doing. He saw you for what you were, a shy, naive little girl pining away after the most popular boy in school. He saw his chance and he made his home inside your brain, cozied on up to your abandonment issues and your self esteem problems. He controlled you however he wanted since you grew to crave his attention. Any attention from him. For two years.

Jake used you however he saw fit. Whenever he saw fit.

“Did you do the homework last night, princess? Think I could take a peek at your answers real fast? Just want to check that you did it right. Wouldn’t want you to get a bad grade.”

“Darlin’, do you think you could stop by the store later for me on your way over? You said you got some money from babysitting the other day.”

“Baby, you know I love you so much, right? Why don’t you come over tonight and cook us some dinner instead of going to the movies with your friends? My parents went out tonight.”

“We should definitely be partners for that project, darlin’. I know you can get us an A.”

You didn’t want to see how he was treating you. You didn’t want to acknowledge his treatment or his lies.

Oh the lies.

“You know nobody will ever love you like I can?”

“Do your friends even care about you, darlin’? Doesn’t seem like it.”

“I’m just going to hang out with my buddies, princess. Nobody else will be there. Promise.”

“C’mon baby, you know I only have eyes for you. She was just asking about the homework.”

“We were just talkin’ in my room. Nothing to worry your pretty little mind over.”

“Why are you getting so upset? I would never do anything to hurt you. You know that.”

You’ll still never know the true extent of his lies.

You didn’t want to dig too far, afraid of what you might find.

You knew enough.

You were told enough.

You’d seen enough.

His friends felt bad for you. Told you that you didn’t deserve to be treated this way. You didn’t deserve to be lied to like this. You knew it had to be bad if some immature high school boys took the time to tell you.

You stopped by his house one day to drop a freshly baked pie off even though he wasn’t home. Jake’s father took you aside to make sure you knew this wasn’t how he raised his son. Jake wasn’t raised to treat anyone like this, let alone someone he supposedly loved.

His father told you to leave Jake. Told you that he can’t stand seeing his son hurt you like this.

You told his father and his friends that you had no idea what they were talking about but that was a lie. Deep down you knew. Deep down you’d known all along. You didn’t want to admit it. You so badly wanted this to work.

Why couldn’t the shy girl get the quarterback? Why couldn’t they fall in love and be high school sweethearts? Get married and have a bunch of kids. Why couldn’t someone like him be interested in someone like you?

Though you knew why. Other girls whispered exactly why to each other when they thought you couldn’t hear. You still pretended not to.

It was all a picture perfect dream come true for you until the edges started to fray and the colors faded.

You held on. You wanted it so badly but you also didn’t want to see the aftermath. When he was finally turned loose and was able to do what he wanted without hiding anything.

You knew what you had to do. You just didn’t want to. You needed an easier way.

So you convinced your parents that you had to move to college early. You had to move immediately after high school. You needed time to acclimate to your new state. Somehow they agreed. You’re not sure if it was some divine intervention or if somehow they had heard the whispers around town. It’s not like he hid what he was doing well and you lived in such a small town. Everyone was always in each other’s business.

Months ago you called your cousin crying when you started to think about what to do about Jake. Russel was your best friend. The two of you spent every summer together as children on your grandparent’s ranch. Thick as thieves your grandparents would say. Even though he was a few years older your friendship never wavered as you grew up. He was like your big brother.

Russ helped you to decide that the best course of action was to break it off and leave. That way you didn’t have to see what he does afterwards. You could be anywhere else. Doing anything else. And if you didn’t run into your friends or his friends nobody would tell you anything. Russ may have also convinced you that you needed to go to college at the same college he goes to . States away from Texas. Safe away from Texas.

So that’s what you did. The night before you left to head to your new school you broke it off with Jake.

He didn’t react much just shrugged it off. Told you that you weren’t that pretty anyways and that you never put out for him. Told you he planned to break up with you soon anyways before he headed to the Naval Academy. He couldn’t date someone like you when he went there. He needed to be dating someone more on his level and you just weren’t it. You’d never been it. If anything he pitied you and that’s why you two were dating.

You nodded and showed him the door quickly. You wouldn’t let him see you cry. He wouldn’t get that satisfaction.

Part 2

[nburkhardt]

Was talking about projecting with @i-less-than-three-you and uh….Thought of Something.

Growing up Steve wasn’t allowed opinions or talking back. It made him silent, made him want to speak up but words got caught. Doubt would start up and he just didn’t do anything.

It made life harder on himself but eventually he grew more and more. Eventually realizing he can have opinions, can voice them and eventually, talking back.

His confidence grew with it but unfortunately so did the anxiety, the doubt.

But not only that, but he was silenced too. Ignored. He’d start talking, have a good conversation with anyone but sometimes, when whoever he’s talking to doesn’t like what he said or wants to move on, they’ll talk over him and say whatever they want.

He remembers a car ride with his mother once, talking about his father and when he started admitting his disdain and annoyance with him, his mother ignored it and immediately pointed something out to him and refused to speak about the original thing. It made him feel silenced, uncomfortable and felt out ignored.

To this day it all still happens, not so much with his parents anymore. They’re too wrapped up into their business, not at all concerned about him anymore. But it happens with his friends and found family, his brain has definitely trained him into snapping his mouth shut when it happens now.

It’ll always hurt, he thinks, knows.



~

Does it make sense?? I hope it reads okay. I was rambling/venting by projecting onto Steve (again)

Under the cut is a vent/explanation and my taglist (idk if this counts as a fic but I’m sure you’ll all want to be informed that I am still here thinking up ideas & can write. Wips just aren’t there yet ☹️)

btw: peeps on my taglist is this something you wanna be tagged on or do you just want to just be tagged on fics??

I didn’t notice it was even happening until recently. But my family does this thing when I’m talking and they’re not happy with whenever or wants to move on or doesn’t care for what I’m saying, they’ll switch the topic. They’ll come up with an excuse or mumble under their breath, or just say something else entirely.

It didn’t click until I started actively changing my outlook with everything. (Also when I had a fucking massive breakdown in the middle of quarantine in 2020) Once you notice it, it’s hard to ignore. It happened to me just recently again, I was trying to talk to my mom about some family issues and I started to notice her shaking her head and then immediately mumbled about something she was looking at. It made me shut up immediately and realized she wasn’t going to hear me.

It’s a constant battle and I always lose the words to speak up.

Anyway, taglist!!!!

@spectrum-spectre @itsfreakingbats @mysticcrownshipper @artiststarme @thereindeerlady @justforthedead89 @ronniescontinuum @freyaforestafay @littlewildflowerkitten @estrellami-1 @gregre369 @zerokrox-blog @bookworm0690 @flustratedcas @carlprocastinator1000 @marvelmwah @solliesolesito @navnae @grimmfitzz

[starrylayle]

Marauders headcanons — Remus Lupin

Ok so, I’ve been seeing a lot of controversy surrounding the fanonization of the marauders era characters,, and while they’re in no way problematic per se, I’m more interested in headcanons that expand on canon characterization, so here’s a few of my personal headcanons:

5'10 -- quite thin, terrible posture

I imagine that Remus was quite strong despite his thin stature, possibly due to his werewolfness. We know from the books that Remus was able to contain sirius when he was in fits of anger, despite previous description of him as thin and frail.

Remus hates his strength, he is terrified of what he may or may not be able to do. He always tries to compensate for this, trying to be mellow, patient and doing his very best not to succumb to his anger. He thinks the anger comes from ‘the wolf’ and not him, so he does all he can to suppress it.

He is a very angry man tho — he just tries to suppress it, coming off as patient and mellow.

I also picture Remus from a poor background — I think that is mostly canon anyhow — he always tries to compensate for this by speaking speaking as posh as he can, dressing presentable, etc, etc. He doesn’t quite succeed in this tho and ends up coming off as a little awkward and stilted.

Ok now a little bit of projecting with something that’s definitely not canon but I think really fits into his character — he has OCD. Most of his intrusive thoughts contain him hurting his loved one as a werewolf, because he’s a werewolf, etc, etc. idk if this is common knowledge or not but a lot of ppl who have ocd (like me), when they’re met with these violent intrusive though perform obsessive rituals as a way to ‘counter act’ these thoughts from becoming real. So I imagine Remus is always mumbling to himself and doing repetitive tasks/gestures that no one really takes notice of except Sirius, who just assumes he’s being his quirky self.

Remus grew up pretty isolated, and when he did interact with ppl it was mostly with older adults so he doesn’t really know how to communicate with kids his age until he gets to hogwarts

I hc that his dad left shortly after Remus was bit (Lyall couldn’t stand the guilt and the hurt of having a werewolf as a son), so Remus grew up with a muggle mother who had no idea how to handle his wizard/werewolfness so he was being constantly hospitalised as a kid. His mother was also a little afraid of him and even tho Remus knew she loved him very much, he knew she didn’t quite know what to do with him. Also I imagine that his mum mental health slowly deteriorated after his father left so she was bed ridden quite a lot.

He loved reading and listening to music (could be a bit of a snob when it came to those two interests) as that’s how he used fill his void as a child. I really like the dyslexia hc that atyd had tho so maybe if he didn’t learn to read till hogwarts, he would spend most of his childhood in small isolated corners dreaming up worlds — and when he finally learnt to read that was his substitute.

Remus Lupin was not naturally smart,, but he never thought he’d be able to get into hogwarts and so he feels like he kinda owes it to himself to get good grades. Thus he studies so hard, way harder than sirius or James ever would have to, yet he doesn’t ever get quite as good as them. He is a little bit jealous but he would never hold that against them because he’s so grateful that he was even granted such an opportunity.

He feels like he doesn’t deserve friends as good as the marauders and has a huge inferiority complex. He keeps to himself and always tries to keep his issues away from his friends so as not to burden them.

He can be sarcastic tho, and has dry wit. He doesn’t think he’s very funny and always gets surprised when ppl laugh at his joke. He can also have a bit of dark humour at times.

He blindly trusts and idolises dumbledore. He thinks he owes his life to him, and would do whatever he could to please dumbledore.

During The Prank, he didn’t actually think he would kill Snape, probably just bite him, but for him a fate as a werewolf is much worse than death so he hates sirius for allowing that to happen. (In canon — it is stated that werewolves don’t often kill ppl — they usually just injure them or bite them into becoming one). Tho of course he forgives sirius eventually despite his better judgement, because he could never hold a grudge, especially against one of his closest friends (or lover…).

Appearance-wise, I hc Remus to be biracial. His mum is a Black woman from London and his dad is a Jewish Welsh man. he has light brown skin and eyes, a wide crooked nose broken from his nights in the full moon, and 3a-3b dark brown curls. I also imagine Lily to be from a Jewish background so I like to think that she would introduce Remus to Jewish traditions he felt that he’s been left out from — oh and speaking of which, Remus and Lily have a very special friendship!!

Also on appearance — i imagine that he’s super average looking. Like literally just some guy — sirius however thinks he’s so hot and that the sun shines out of his ass (no one gets it))

Remus with chronic pain + mobility aids. I think that lycanthropy being used as a metaphor for disability and such is quite common, and reasonably so.

Oh yeah, and this probably goes without saying,, he’s like, super gay. And in love with sirius. His marriage to tonks was one of convenience lol. (Again, just my headcanon!!)

Oop this was super long and ramble-y. Let me know if u enjoyed it and if u have any similar hcs! Prolly gonna do sirius next because that man is super mischaracterised in fanon holy shit.

[sophieinwonderland]

Hi. Sorry to bother you, Sophie. But I need some advice. I need to know if I might have accidentally created a tulpa. Because I’m panicking.

There’s this character. That I hyperfixated on. I suffer from psychosis, and my episodes have been getting increasingly worse. One of my coping mechanisms has been projecting all of my problems onto a character and subsequently obsessing over them. I made this version of them that lived inside my head that I would just monologue to while pacing around the room and gesturing wildly to the air. I idolized them. Made them real to me. Pretended to be them for the sense of power I got.

Recently I’ve been having some very… weird interactions with that character and their source material. I don’t know how much detail I want to go into, or if I’m even able to explain. I thought it might have just been my psychosis acting up. But things got really weird today, and it culminated with me self-harming. I took a shower with some lavender to calm down, and now I’m messaging you because you’re tumblr’s prime expert on tulpas.

The idea that this character might live inside my head now, permanently… that is scary. For one, they don’t deserve that. They’re awesome and amazing and definitely don’t deserve to be stuck inside a scrawny psycho. For two, do they carry over all of the mental issues that I heaped onto them as a coping mechanism? I don’t have the mental fortitude to handle that. As was demonstrated today. For three, what if they hate me? For accidentally getting them stuck here?

I don’t know. If you could direct me to any resources that would be great.

First, sorry for taking a while to get to this.

If this anon was you...

I've just had a lot of asks over the past week, and it's hard to keep up with them all. My inbox is currently at 235, and sometimes I'll go to bed and wake up to see I have 7 new asks. (Though some are duplicates.)

I try to keep up with them, but things can get lost.

That said, I realize this was an important one, so I'm sorry about that.

Although, if the second anon isn't the first one and those are unrelated... then yeah, Tumblr ate it. 🤷‍♀️

...

Anyway, I'm sorry you're going through this right now. I know it's confusing and stressful.

I'm not too educated on psychotic disorders and how they might influence plurality, so take everything I say with a grain of salt.

But there are aspects of your story that seem familiar to myself as a tulpa. When you mention this...

Pretended to be them for the sense of power I got.

It sounds similar to how my host thought of me when we started our proto-switching. It wasn't for a sense of power, but to understand the character he was writing better. But he would often "pretend to be me" to get into that sort of mindset.

Thinking back, I think what was happening was at least a little bit dissociative, where he would "become" me for a time. I don't consider this the same as our full switches that we learned later. But they were at least partial switches or blending.

I wonder if something similar might be going on here.

For two, do they carry over all of the mental issues that I heaped onto them as a coping mechanism?

All your headmates share a brain. If there are mental issues present, then they're going to affect all your headmates. Regardless of whether you feel that you gave those issues to them.

But I think that's okay. If you think about created headmates like children in this regard, I don't subscribe to the idea that people with genetic disorders shouldn't reproduce because their children could inherit those. I'm speaking as someone whose host's father has schizophrenia. And so I see no issue with making headmates just because those headmates might have mental problems as well.

I don’t have the mental fortitude to handle that. As was demonstrated today.

I don't believe that. Discovering a headmate is always scariest in the beginning. But you get used to it over time. And not really a lot of time either. A month down the road, and there's a good chance that being plural will feel normal. At least relatively to how it feels now.

You had a bad day. But you can move forward. A bad day, or even a few bad days, doesn't define you.

And maybe you'll find that you can be even stronger together. Some tulpa systems have reported that having a tulpa helped them deal with their psychosis, even helping them tell when they might be having a hallucination or delusion from it.

For three, what if they hate me? For accidentally getting them stuck here?

You didn't really get them stuck there. You just... created them. It's not like they would be somewhere else if you hadn't made them, despite what their exo-memories might tell them. If they're a tulpa, they wouldn't exist without you. You gave them a life. And that's cool.

I can't speak for your tulpa. But maybe you should let them speak for themselves and discuss your thoughts with them like adults.

I think it's unlikely that they'll hate you for making them. If they do though, all you can do is try to do better by them. Repairing a relationship isn't always easy, but you can with work.

And since you clearly care about them, I think the work would be worth it.

I might recommend this guide on how to be the best host you can to get started.

Wishing you both better days to come! 💖

[tojikai]

i am extremely late to the sunders(?) fic ending i read it a while ago and couldn’t find it again but now 🥲 i have so many feelings about it. definitely not bad just pity and sympathy

gojo’s mom as terrible as she was, is clearly going through “the other woman” syndrome and is projecting that onto naomi who is a very on the fence about what she’s coaching her to do. i felt so bad i know she’s a rapist, like ew yucky!!! but also she’s just terribly misguided and also suffering from the other woman syndrome as despite her having the man she would’ve ended up just like gojo’s mom is they had gotten married.

gojo’s dad is the worst in my opinion. idk if i missed anything. did mom gojo trap him with the baby? 😭 if she did then he isn’t the worst but if she didn’t i have so feelings surrounding him bc… marrying a woman u don’t love and sticking through it for gojo and just saying she’s “just there” 😣 omg idk if i’m just a lover girl but i genuinely believe everyone should experience some type of reciprocal love in their life.

if they just decided to have a healthy co parenting relationship instead of slapping the marriage bandaid on their issues NONE of this would’ve happened! sorry this is so long but this is the first fic in a while to make me actually had deep thoughts and feelings. i didn’t really feel y/n as “me” more like another character.

moral of my talk? DO NOT DATE MEN WITH KIDS AND BABY MOMS!!!! they’ll break u 😭😭😢 again sorry this is so long i just needed to say something about this and my notes app is tired

satoru's mom definitely has something wrong w her😭 i feel she tried to turn naomi into someone like her so she doesn't feel too miserable abt her situation smh. naomi's definitely misguided, she was already blinded by her love for satoru and her pursuit of happiness and then satoru's mother made it worse by coaxing her to do something so terrible.

satoru's mom didn't INTENTIONALLY babytrap his father. what happened was she got pregnant and then she terrorized papagojo's ex wife into leaving. he tried to look for them but was denied and even told by his exwife's family to respect her choice. other than that, he can't really find her. so he thought that the least thing he could do for his remaining son is to give him a "proper" family :')) but it did more harm than good bc he can't even fully love satoru's mother. in the end, their problems manifested in their relationships

anywayyy i enjoyed reading this, and reading that you really saw yn as a character of her own makes me feel like i really created an individual w their own personality <3 thank you sm for your support~!!

[cyberphuck]

Assassin’s Apprentice Abridged: Part One

EDIT: Tumblr randomly swallowed like 500 words in the middle of this, so I've added that back in.

I am finally embarking on my long-threatened project to summarize all of the Farseer Trilogy for my friend Razz so they can understand my shitposts about it but don’t actually have to read it. I started with this post about the cast of characters in the first book.

This is being broken up into sections because the trilogy and AA in particular (as well as Royal Assassin... whew, that one’s gonna be hard) is so insanely long and complex.

And now, Ladies and Gentlequeers, AA Abridged: Part One.

We open on the narrator musing both about writing a history of the Six Duchies (but being unable to because every time he tries it turns into a salty rant about everything bad that's ever happened to him) and also about how very old and decrepit he is. He is hunched over his writing desk, his fingers gnarled and knuckly, literally crumbling away like a Thanos-snapped MCU character as he sorrowfully attempts to make some record of the long and storied life he's lived before he lapses into the sweet void of death.

Fitz is 35.

"I bet you're wondering how I got here," Fitz writes. "It all began when I was born. Neither of my parents bothered to show up."

Actually, the curtain opens on Fitz as a six year old, being hauled up to the front doors of a fort by a cranky older man. "Surely you must have memories of your childhood before six," someone in the audience asks, but Fitz replies "No, I definitely don't, I never did and I'm tired of you asking me that." It never really becomes super important what he was doing before he was six, unless you count the time where he was traveling from the King-In-Waiting's ballsack to the sweet hot vagina of Some Lady He Never Spoke To Again.

Fitz is scooped up and brought inside the fort, and presented to Prince Verity. You'd think Verity would be at least a little upset that his older brother has muddied the line of succession with his long-ago nut, but Verity acts as if Fitz's existence is the funniest thing he's ever seen. "Yep, looks just like him," Verity confirms, then instructs a soldier to bring Fitz to Burrich.

That's right, the cranky old man hammers on the front door, waits for someone to open it, says "this is Prince Chivalry's kid and I'm tired of dealing with him," and then walks off. Despite this, Fitz never develops any abandonment issues and only has healthy and honest relationships with people for the rest of his life.

"Those are all the memories I have of that fort," Fitz writes, "except for that one night that Prince Verity, Burrich, and Prince Regal stood and looked in on me in the stall and Regal complained that I was muddying the line of succession."

Burrich does not think this situation is as funny as Verity did.

But he's honest and loyal, so he sighs and says "C'mon, Lil Accident, I'll find a place for you to sleep." That place is in a horse stall with Vixen, the hound dog, and Nosy, her pup. Burrich looks down at all of them, mutters "Patience is gonna have a fucking aneurysm" and then walks off.

After a couple of weeks, Burrich puts Lil Accident on a horse behind him and they ride away from Moonseye and towards Buckkeep. During this time, offstage, Fitz's father Chivalry gets word of his appearance and does the only sensible and logical thing, which is to ollie out the window while flipping everyone off and yelling "GOOD LUCK FIGURING THIS ONE OUT, LOSERS!" He abdicates and retires to a farm with his weirdo wife, which pisses off basically everyone.

Burrich and Fitz arrive at Buckkeep, the capital of the Six Duchies, a tall castle on a hill overlooking the ocean. Burrich is the stablemaster, in charge of all the critters large and small at the keep. He'd also been Chivalry's right hand man until he'd jumped in front of a boar to keep it from killing the Prince and fucked up his leg. Burrich comes home to Buckkeep with a bad leg and a six year old bastard to find that his bestie has just fucking peaced out without saying anything to him. He's kind of having a bad day. He hands Fitz off to stableboy Cobb, who leads him and pup Nosy to the kitchens to get something to eat.

Cobb sits FItz-and-Nosy just outside the kitchens and goes inside for delicious pie. A burly man walks by Fitz, does a double-take, then points and yells, "Hey everyone! It's Chivalry's Bastard!"

Fitz shrinks down.

"I heard you don't even have a name!" Burly man hollers, then gets right up in Fitz's face. "Is that true, tiny and defenseless six year old boy that I'm accosting? You don't have a name?"

Fitz yells "NOOOOOO" and, like a tiny, dirty Jedi master, force-shoves the man onto his ass. The crowd, assuming that the dude was just a coward who couldn't handle being yelled at by a toddler, has a laugh and carries on with their tasks. Fitz gets up and he and Nosy run away and spend all day hiding in a hole.

Burrich does eventually find him, and with a hearty "what the fuck you can't just burrow underneath the shed, get out of there," returns him to the stables, where his new home is Burrich's little bachelor pad above the stalls. In the days and weeks that follow, Fitz wakes up, eats breakfast, and immediately escapes the keep to go down to the town and run around with a bunch of street kids.

Fitz doesn't say much but he's game for anything and he has a dog, so he's accepted into the gang as "Newboy." He and his new friends generally just run around making trouble, stealing food, and bothering people. One of the notables in the bunch is Molly Nosebleed, called that because she always looks like someone just got done beating the shit out of her. Wholesome!

One sunny day, Fitz, Molly and Nosy are on the rocks near the beach looking for sheel to eat. I have no idea what sheel is and neither does Google. Then Molly's dad shows up to hit her with a stick to teach her a lesson about having a drunk, violent dad.

Alarmed, Fitz force-shoves Molly's dad into the sand. Molly immediately freaks out and struggles to get dad back on his feet to stagger back to their candle-making shop (or chandlery if you're feeling fancy). Fitz is confused at the intricacies of abusive relationships, but relieved that no one yet knows that he has force-shoving powers.

Aside from his brief encounter with childhood trauma, everything is going great for Fitz. Then one day, while he and his fellow urchins (and Nosy) are running from a dude whose sausages they just stole, Fitz runs right the fuck into Burrich.

"You get your butt right back up to the castle, young man," Burrich says, dragging Fitz along by his ear. "And if I EVER find out you've been down in town hanging out with someone again, I will personally have sex with them a bunch of times," he added foreshadowingly.

"I don't have to do what you say," Fitz barks.

"Bark," says Nosy.

Burrich's eyes narrow. "How many fingers am I holding up?" he asks.

"I don't really know numbers," says Fitz.

"Bark," says Nosy.

"Nosy says that's three," Fitz translates.

"Alrighty then, no more puppy for you, the puppy is going to live on a farm upstate," Burrich says. He drags the puppy outside.

Presumably something cool happens to it.

So now instead of slumming around Buckkeep Town, Fitz spends his days following Burrich around and being taught how to manage horses and dogs but not birds because birds apparently hate bastards. Fitz is careful not to let Burrich see him being friendly with any animals.

One day, Fitz is sitting underneath a table in the Great Hall, being friendly with a bunch of puppies. It's the morning after a party and there's plenty of leftover food to be had, and he's happily stuffing pies down his shirt and sharing pieces with the pups. Then he hears footsteps and who should show up but KING SHREWD!

Shrewd is technically Fitz's grandfather but has never really spoken to him. He's walking along with Prince Regal (*crowd boos*) and the king's new fool, a weirdo albino child who's just cartwheeling along behind them.

Fitz goes "hmm, time to bounce" and crawls out from under the table. Shrewd stops to look at him. "Ah, the Little Accident," he says. "If you leave weapons laying around, someone will eventually pick them up and stab you with them."

"What?" says Regal.

"What?" says Fitz.

"I am not going to leave you laying around for someone else to kill me with," Shrewd says. "Lil Accident, take this pin. I am going to to feed you, train you, house you and clothe you. If anyone's got shit to say about it, show them this pin. It means you belong to me."

"...Okay, sure," Fitz shrugs. He puts the pin into the collar of his shirt. Shrewd nods magnanimously and walks on. Regal flips him off. The Fool cartwheels out the door as they leave.

That night, Fitz goes home to Burrich's bachelor pad, but Burrich turns him right back around. "You done gone and did it now," he says. "King Shrewd noticed you and now you're gonna have to go live inside the castle like a fancy lad. Go on."

"But despite my fear and resentment of you, I see you as a protector and father figure," Fitz says.

"Oh little boy who blew up my life, I love and resent you too," Burrich assures him. "If you get lonely, you can come back down here and I'll murder another puppy for you."

Fitz trudges up to the castle. He has a room of his own. There's a fucking weird tapestry on the wall of the ancient King Wisdom consorting with... what is that thing? Slenderman? It's creepy.

Weeks go by. Fitz is kept busy with new lessons in reading and writing and 'rithmetic, as well as swordery. Once in a very long while, he makes the trip back down to the town to visit his buddies, but those trips become fewer and farther between.

It's the middle of the night.

Fitz wakes up to a draft and a light in his face. There's an old man at the foot of his bed, holding up a lantern. "Come with me," the old man says.

"Oh," Fitz yawns, getting out of bed. "It's the call to adventure."

The old man leads Fitz to a doorway in the wall that hadn't been there before. This is where the draft was coming from-- a steep staircase leading up between walls. Old man leads Fitz up a maze of passageways and then finally to a huge hidden room with all the amenities a crazy old wall-man could want, like a fireplace and comfy chairs and a big bed and a library and a science lab.

Also, the old looks like he took a hot frying pan to the face. Like he really looks like hell.

"Wrow," Fitz says.

"Wrow indeed, boy," the old man agrees. "My name is Chade. I bet I look familiar to you. Well it's because I'm King Shrewd's brother and I blah blah blah I have a weasel named Slink. Next you're going to ask what the fuck happened to my face. I can tell everything you're thinking, because I'm a master spy and assassin and-- now this part you should take to heart-- I am always right about everything. Never doubt me."

"Okay," Fitz says.

"Good. That out of the way, let's train you to kill people."

[talshiargirlfriend]

Following on from this one … more ✨vibes✨ for @candiedsumire and @deadheaddaisy (like a weird reverse vampire I will gladly tag anyone is these but you have to invite yourself in)

We’re nearly to emergency brownies and Only One Bed, but I’m impatient.

After a day full of simulations and last minute adjustments in preparation for live testing, Commander Tucker and SubCommander T’Pol boarded a transport bound for Florida. 

“So it’ll just be my parents at dinner tonight and maybe my sister Lizzie. Shouldn’t be too bad.” Trip sighed. 

“Are you not looking forward to seeing your family?”

“No, I am. It’s just - I guess I’m kinda nervous about us -  y’know, acting like we’re together.”

“Our colleagues have expressed no qualms, and  your father apparently already believed we were romantically involved,” T’Pol pointed out. 

Trip’s ears burned. She was right. Now that he thought about it, no one on the project had even really seemed surprised. Fair enough from the other Vulcans, but even Rostov had taken it in stride. “Yeah, well, I guess we were pretty convincing on the dance floor. But at work we have to act professional, and at home it’s just us. Around my family we’ll have to actually act like we’re ‘romantically involved.’”

T’Pol looked at him expectantly. 

“I know Vulcans aren’t big on public displays of affection, so it’s not like anyone will expect us to be making out in the hall or anything… but we should act close, you know? Like maybe I should call you a nickname sometimes? Stand close together, you know, nonverbal communication. Maybe not hold hands exactly but casually touch a little… What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Commander-“

He raised an eyebrow to remind her of their agreement not to address each other by rank off-duty. 

“Trip,” she corrected. “You already do those things.”

“What?” 

“You have called me darling several times and sweetheart twice, typically when you were making a joke at my expense.”

He frowned. “Ok, yeah, I do tease you some. But what about the other stuff?”

T’Pol conspicuously turned her head to look at his hand where it rested on the back of her seat and then met his startled eye. Before he could say anything she then gestured to the scant distance between them where their thighs nearly touched. 

He looked at her in concern, “Have I been making you uncomfortable?” 

“I have been trained to tolerate offensive situations,” she responded flatly. 

He leaned back sharply and opened his mouth to apologise before he caught the mischief in her expression. 

“Okay, you had me going.” He grinned, “You give as good as you get in the teasing department, darlin’.”

“We have formed a friendship. I do not find your proximity unpleasant,” she reassured him.

His smile faded into a slight grimace. “Speaking of proximity, we’ll definitely be sharing a bedroom. There aren’t that many rooms in the house, plus …“ Trip couldn’t think of a polite way to say ‘everyone thinks we’re banging,’ so he just left the thought hanging in the air between them. 

“We have been living in close quarters for the past few weeks with no issue. I don’t foresee any difficulty with the arrangements for the next two days.” Her voice took on a note of concern, “Do you?”  

“I guess not,” he conceded. “You’ll probably get tired of looking at my face, and my back might get a little stiff from sleeping on the floor but otherwise… “

T’Pol raised one brow, “Then perhaps you should relax for the remainder of the journey.”

“Are you suggesting I’m overthinking this?”

She didn’t actually say ‘obviously,’ but her face pretty clearly communicated the sentiment. 

“All right, sweetheart, you win this round.”

T’Pol patted his leg in a consoling gesture. “I believe the expression in your language is ‘there, there, dear.’”

Trip shook his head, laughing. “Oh, they’re gonna love you.”