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plumpedxprincess · 2 years ago

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The Breeding Facility (Part 2)

reader insert | accelerated pregnancy | multiples | rapid hyper preg

~~~

“Welcome back!” Your doctor says, “I hope your rest period was well. Are you ready for your next pregnancy?”

You nod eagerly.

Your doctor goes over options, saying you can choose a 5 day solo pregnancy or a 10 day multiple. Without complications from your last go around, you can pick either one.

You hesitate but ask anyway, “Is there anyway I could do a multiple pregnancy in five days?”

Your doctor looks surprised at the question but shuffled through her paper work. “That is an option, but it’s typically left for more advanced breeders who’ve been with us for a while.”

“Oh, that’s fine—“

“No, no!” she interrupts, “That of course is an option for you! There are a few things to understand though.”

Dr. Ambrosia explains that multiples are inseminated 3x more than solo pregnancies, so they are unsure how many babies each person will have until day 2. She also explains that due to the more rapid growth, the breeder is required to eat six meals instead of three to keep up energy levels.

“Are you still interested?”

You lick your lips with anticipation. “Yes.”

“Then let’s get started.”

~~~

Day one leaves little to focus on except your eating. While you don’t mind eating a lot of food, you didn’t realize how much food would be required. Your belly sticks out a bit, but your clothing still fits well.

You ask around to see what you could expect from a multiples pregnancy, hoping to hear a rough estimate of how many people typically carry, but you get a wide range of numbers from just twins to 6 or 7 babies.

You can’t tell if the thought of seven babies terrified or excites you. You love watching yourself grow.

~~~

“Oh my, you’re carrying triplets!”

You smile at the easy number while also being happy that you didn’t get stuck with just twins.

“Is there anything else I can help you with?” your doctor asks.

“Yeah, actually,” you say, “My clothing is getting tight and I still have two days left, is there anyway to get new clothing?”

“I apologize but we can only request clothing before pregnancies. It’s a rule from the higher ups. I’ll be able to get you some for the next pregnancy but for this you’ll have to stick with these.”

“But by day five this will be so exposing!”

“Apologies!”

It feels like some silly joke, but as you go home, you realize just how many exposed bellies you see. You don’t mind all that much as your shirt rests just above your belly button.

~~~

The biggest difference in accelerating a multiples pregnancy is the way you feel yourself growing.

Every once in a while, in a calm moment, you could look down and notice your belly getting a little bit larger, a little bit fuller. Your clothes a little bit tighter.

Your shirt has stopped fitting when you woke up on your fourth day. It was acting more like a sports bra at this point, barely containing your breasts that had grown quite large overnight.

You were constantly stroking your belly, trying to calm the kicks but also trying to feel like it was covered. Having your full navel on display was a bit much.

It was around dinner time on your fifth day when you felt yourself grow the most, and you knew others could see it too. You were on your fifth meal of the day and had decided to be ambitious and eat in the common area.

As you shoved pasta into your mouth, you paused from a strange sensation, placing your hands on your stomach as it gurgled.

Before you knew it, it was like you were inflating. Your fingertips that had been touching now separated and your thighs widen to accommodate the space your belly was starting to take up.

A few people looked on, some in strange fascination and a few others with a knowing look.

You couldn’t help the moan you let out once you felt how your breasts had grown a bit too. Your hips felt plush within the seat at the dining table and the table itself was now pressing into your large dome of a belly.

It was over in just a few minutes, but once you realized it was done, you worked to get out of your seat, hoping to get home to relieve the horniness that the growth spurt had created.

Getting out of the chair took a minute, but you were walking as fast as you could once you got up.

When you laid on your bed with your vibrator on, eager to get off, you reached down, only to realize you couldn’t reach your clit at all. Your belly was in the way.

You groaned in frustration, hoping the other, longer vibrator you had could work.

It did, and soon enough you were coming on your sheets, one hand rubbing the vibrator across your nether regions while your other hand traveled between your nipples and your belly. You loved the feeling that your belly button was finally popped.

Just when you were about to go to sleep, room service knocked on the door, with your last meal.

And boy was it a doozy. The last meal was nearly all desserts, from cheesecake to chocolate cake to ice cream to fudge and cookies.

While you were worn out from your orgasms, you knew you had to eat in case of another growth spurt in the middle of the night. The food helped make some padding of fat so your skin wasn’t so tight, and it also made sure the babies and you had enough energy for the accelerated pregnancy.

By the time you finished the meal, you were laying on your side, your hands roaming the soft dome at your midsection. You couldn’t believe you weren’t full term yet. That would be tomorrow. You fell asleep curious and a bit nervous about what it would feel like.

~~~

You woke up on your back, nearly unable to breathe from the weight resting on top of you. You managed to sit up right, your legs nestled around your belly. If you thought you were large yesterday, you were practically gargantuan now.

You noticed the seam on your shorts had ripped in the middle of the night, so you slid out of them. When you looked down, all you could see was belly. No feet, no legs. Just belly.

Your back was sore from the weight but there were some pain meds along with your other medications. You wondered if they would really even help the full ache that spread through your body. You truly felt like you were all belly and babies.

Your doctor came in early to say that you could go down to the labor wing to spend the day. It was best if you stayed in bed until you gave birth.

In the labor wing, they asked you to continuously eat all day until your contractions would start, and the constant food caused two more growth spurts, which they said were completely normal.

You felt huge and overdue by the time your water finally broke. This pregnancy was feeling like a burden but you were also kind of in love with the feeling. Knowing your body was doing so much to ensure these babies were healthy and well was amazing.

You couldn’t wait to do it again.

#pregnancy kink #multiples pregnancy #hyperpregnancy #accelerated pregnancy #rapid pregnancy #rapid preg #hyperpreg #fpreg #writing #weight gain #pregnant #pregblr #breeding facility

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lucozaynkisses · 29 days ago

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Weight loss tips 🙂‍↕️🩰

I actually used to weight 145 lbs now I weigh around 129 and want to reach 120 here’s some things I’ve noticed make it easier for me to stay consistent

1. Eating less instead of cutting out foods!

This is a major one. I need to make sure my body doesn’t feel restricted because the moment I over restrict is the moment everything goes to shit and I end up eating everything in front of me. Eating smaller portions is key.

2. Try to stop thinking so much about food

This one is so hard but it really helps when I stop focusing so much on food. Realize food is not the most important thing in the world. Don’t think so much about what the next thing ur gonna eat is when u just ate or that thing ur going to where ur prob going to eat more than u should. Live in the moment and try to focus entirely on something else. Food is just food.

3. Don’t weigh urself every second of the day!

The most discouraging thing is looking at the scale and seeing it went up a little when in reality it’s only temporary. You’re setting urself up for failure when u constantly weigh urself so set a limit to how many times u can weigh urself. I am now only doing it once a week.

4. LIMIT STRESS AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE!

The whole reason I gained so much weight when I weighed 145 was because of the amount of stress I had in my body. No matter the amount of exercise I did and how much I dieted I never lost weight. I literally beg u guys to do everything u can to keep ur stress levels as low as possible. It will seriously delay ur results. This also means not turning weight loss into something stressful.

5. Do things gradually

The easiest way to make urself give up and fail is by going directly into hardcore exercise and hardcore restriction. Start with things you know you can stay consistent. Like for example I’m only doing a 20 min at home full body Pilates that isn’t so hard for me to do and a leg workout that’s super quick and only doing them 3x per week rn. Now that I’ve started to get used to it I’m adding more. Same thing with a calorie deficit. Lower ur calorie intake gradually. This is the best way to get urself used to a new lifestyle.

6. LONG TERM RESULTS IS BETTER THAN QUICK RESULTS!!!

Trust me I know this is one of the hardest things to hear but ur life will be so much easier once u accept it. Patience is key in this process. I could go restrict myself to the extreme to lose weight and make myself sick but that route will always end badly. It will always end with you gaining the weight back and being even more upset because u got there and gained it back. The only way to have results that are maintainable is by having patience and staying consistent

7. Turn jealousy into motivation

When u look at other girls with the body that u want, instead of feeling jealousy, anger, and hatred, stop making excuses as to why they have it and why it’s not possible for u. They are not special and if u really want it u can have it too. Turn that negativity into motivation to also get there. U can do it!

8. Learn to trick ur brain

I’m Brazilian and we eat rice and beans everyday. So what I do is ill put like 1-3 spoons of rice and then put so much more beans which that makes me think I’m eating way more rice than I am. We also have spaghetti a lot and I’ll do the same thing so im not having too many carbs. I also fill my plate with veggies.

9. Meal prep

This one is super helpful. Also helps me to not think so much abt food. Sometimes I’m too lazy but I like leaving chicken in the fridge already cut and seasoned and it’s so helpful so that when I’m hungry I don’t have to take so much time making food and that helps me not snack on whatever I see before my food is ready.

Hope this was helpful! 💋🫶🏼

Xo, Ary

#losing weight #lose weight tips #weight loss diet #weight goals #it girl #wellness girl #wellnessjourney #dream body #slim body #body goals

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emptycaloriies · 1 year ago

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4n4 rules for November ❄️

* net cals must equal 500 or less (try eat less than 800- if you eat more make sure you burn it off !!)

* try and incorporate a ‘zig-zag pattern’. For example if I eat 400 cals one day the next I will eat 600- just keep alternating to prevent a plateau

* fast at least 1-2 times a week (water fast)

* go to the gym at least 3x a week- focus on cardio to burn calories but add in some strength training so you can get toned too

* metabolism days are important !! don’t risk a plateau, have metab days once every 2 weeks (or more if weight loss begins to slow)

* metab days are for weight maintenance only! do not go above your limit, but make sure to eat more than you usually would

* each week create mini goals with a mini reward in mind, if you complete the goals you get the reward at the end of the week (eg. makeup, clothes, gym accessories etc. this is money you could have spent on food but instead you’re buying yourself something cool!)

*do not reward yourself with food !! the real reward is the weight loss

* still try to have fun !! weight loss doesn’t mean having no social life. make sure to keep in contact with friends, make plans etc, just make plans that don’t contain getting food.

*if you do eat a lot/binge/eat out etc don’t freak out !! Things happen and it’s ok. one bad decision will NOT ruin your progress. the most important thing is you stay consistent- that is literally the key. once you have that down, you’ll lose weight no matter what <3

goal for November: lose 5-8kg 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

((I’ll update y’all at the end of the month))

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just-wrting · 1 year ago

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The Babysitter (Part 4)

Title: The Babysitter (Part 4)

Summary: You do your best to get a little closer to Aaron, while still keeping enough distance that you don't catch feelings. The only problem? It doesn't seem like it's working.

Word Count: 2687

Master List Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

A/N: I promised that Part 4 would be what I posted next and here it is!!!! It only took me longer than expected. I also think that despite the migraines and my terrible work schedule I'll be doing my best to post 3x a week. Also yes I know, I didn't post this at 3 AM my time for once.

You stretch and lean back on the couch. Aaron had texted you that plane had landed and that he’d be on his way soon. It's already much later than you want it to be. Jack has been asleep for a while, leaning against you while the TV plays whatever movie is on.

You know you shouldn’t go to sleep now, not when Aaron is so close to being back home, but you can’t fight it anymore. You shuffle Jack into your arms, it's much harder to move a sleeping child than an awake one, and go to the bedroom.

You're too tired to take Jack to his bed, so you take him to Aaron’s room. You push the covers to Aaron’s bed back and climb in. You shuffle the blanket around you and Jack, tucking it under his chin. Within seconds, you feel your eyes flutter shut. You wish you could stay up until toron gets here. That thought doesn't stop you from falling asleep.

——

You wake up well rested to an empty bed. A slightly burnt smell wafts through the house. You race to the kitchen in a panic, worried that Jack has decided to mess with stuff. Instead Jack is standing next to the toaster, with Aaron.

"You should’ve woken me up,” you say as you lean against the doorway. "You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“I didn't want to wake you. Jack said you had a long week so I thought it was best to let you sleep."

Aaron sets a plate on the table and Jack rushes over to you. He eagerly grabs your arm, and guides you towards the table.

"I helped make you breakfast!"

The way he smiles makes your heart melt, and you sink into a chair.

"Yeah I can see that But is it really okay to eat without you? Maybe I’ll wait a bit.”

Aaron sets two pieces of toast on your plate. The edges are darker than you prefer but you know better than to make a face about it in front of Jack.

"It’s fine. Better to eat it while it's still hot," Aaron says with a gentle smile. "Besides, Jack ate first.”

“That doesn't stop me from feeling a bit bad. How much sleep did you get Aaron?”

His silence is the answer. He got less sleep than you wish he would as is, not to mention how strenuous his job is. You make note to talk to about that habit as soon as you can.

—-

As you pack up your things you hear a knock at the door. You hear Aaron get the door and a voice talking about Jack. Walking to the front door leads to you seeing a mom and son duo.

“He's been talking about this all day," the mom giggles, "I'm so grateful that you’re willing to let Jack come over for a little bit."

You slide up to Aaron and take a look. The kid is Jack’s age, so you guess he's a friend from school. The guess is correct as Jack shoves his shoes on and runs between you and Aaron to go outside.

"I had some stuff to do so it made sense for him to go with a friend.”

"Alright. Just text me when you want me to bring him back. He's always welcome."

With that, the three of them left. You take your time watching Jack get into the car and leave, choosing to stay silent for a minute.

"When did you set that up," you ask, turning to Aaron. "Cause I didn't.”

"This morning. I figured it would give us time to talk about things.”

You nod, "There's still coffee left so we best get to it. I just want a few things to clear up."

A sigh leaves his lips. “I can imagine there's a lot to clear up.

You make both coffees. "I'm not upset with you, if that makes you feel better.

"I suppose it does. I don't know what I'd do if you decided to leave."

"'Probably hire someone else."

"'I don't-" he sighs, “Jack doesn't want someone else."

Your eyes soften as you look at Aaron. He looks exhausted. You want to push him into bed and force him to sleep. You feel yourself thinking about how much you'd like to help him .

“Good thing I love you guys.”

Aaron chuckles. “That’s good. He’d be heartbroken if you left.”

“I can tell. He looks so sad when I have to leave for the night.”

“He does, doesn’t he? What was it you wanted to know?”

You hold the coffee mug in both hands, staring at the surface. There’s only a few topics you want to ask about, you just aren’t sure where to start. There’s stuff about his job, not to mention a topic that you’re positive will be awkward, Jack’s mom.

“Let’s start with an obvious one. Why didn’t you want to tell me about your job? I’m sure that not wanting me to run far away was part of it.”

There’s a pained look on his face. He probably has lots of stories of things happening to people he knows that aren’t agents. You want to give him some sort of comfort, but you aren’t sure what you’d even say.

“You’re right. I also just don’t want you to get hurt. I’ve seen what people will do to people around me and everyone on my team and I was hoping that if you didn’t find out you’d be safer,” he explains, the expression on his face unwavering.

“I’m sorry. I hate to ask it then, but does that choice have anything to do with Jack’s mother? You don’t have to give me details, I just am unsure if I’ll meet her.”

This time, Aaron takes a while to answer. You worry that you’ve asked too much. Clearly something bad happened, and it still weighs heavy on his mind. You choose to focus on your coffee as you try to figure out how to backtrack.

“Forget I asked about it, Aaron. I’m sure I understand enough without you explaining it.”

He shakes his head. “It’s okay. You’re right. My job got in the way and she passed.”

You reach across the table and give his hand a quick squeeze. “You don’t have to say anything else. I’m not entitled to information like that. How about you tell me about this team of yours?”

“I think you’d like them. They do tend to profile everyone however, which can be an issue.”

You give Aaron a smile. “Does that mean you’ve been profiling me since the beginning? And why you didn’t need a background check?”

“Our tech analyst is amazing. She’d find any sort of dirt on you I’d need. Not that I need any.”

“That is a bit terrifying. I’ll make sure to behave I guess. Is she super nosey?”

A small smile breaks across his face. “For sure. Penelope Garcia knows everything I could ever need about you.”

“So do you know everything from my star sign to where I live? Or is that just her?”

“I don’t know any of that. I just made sure you don’t have a criminal background.”

“That’s good. If there’s anything you want to know just ask me. Besides that I don’t have any other questions.”

You down the rest of your coffee and move to the sink.

“Then I’ll get to work. I have some paperwork to get done.”

You turn and look at him. A hand rests on your hip and you frown.

“You’ll do the paperwork after you rest, right? I know for a fact you didn’t get a lot of sleep.”

Aaron looks a bit startled at your question. “I’ll be okay.”

“What time did you get home? When did you go to bed? You slept on the couch, right? When did Jack wake you up?”

“I got home around midnight and went to sleep shortly after. I promise I’m fine.”

You cross your arms and frown. “That doesn’t mean much, Aaron.”

“I’m used to it at this point. Long nights are a part of my job.”

“Aaron, I work with kids. I know how to make you take a nap," you say, Your voice is calm, but you hope he knows you’re serious. "You worry about Jack all the time. Someone has to worry about you.”

“I'll be fine, You don't need to worry about me.”

"Too late. I’m already worried."

Despite the frown, Aaron isn't taking you seriously. His eyes are crinkled and you're sure there's a small hidden behind the coffee mug.

"Since you insist, I'll try to rest. I can’t promise anything."

“I'm sure you'll find the bedroom is nap ready. I swapped out the curtains so it was easier to sleep and brought a fan over.”

Aaron sets his coffee mug next to the sink. You were right about the smile. The corners of his lips are still upturned. You know he’s probably doing this to make you feel better.

—

Thankfully, you’re able to do everything you need around the house. The dishes, sweeping, dusting and various other chores are a breeze without anything or anyone in your way. Things you have been putting off due to a lack of time are officially done. The only place you haven’t cleaned is the master bedroom.

After a few hours, you hear Aaron begin his paperwork. You do your best to not check in on him again, but you can’t help yourself from peering through the crack of the door. His face is set in a frown, and his eyebrows are furrowed. The way he meticulously goes through each page is impressive.

You aren’t sure if he’s eaten, and you can feel the lack of food start to catch up to you. After setting your resolve, you push the door open and lean against the doorframe. Aaron looks up at you almost immediately.

“I know there’s not much in the fridge since I’ve got to go to the store, but did you want lunch? I may not be able to make something that’ll impress you, but I could probably impress a kid,” you joke with a light smile.

While Aaron doesn’t say anything, he gives you more of his attention. You take that as a good sign, and keep rambling.

“Does a PB&J with an apple and milk sound okay? There’s even some leftover brownies that I’ll throw in. That’s something a kid may like, but maybe not something you’d like.”

“Sure. That does sound like something that a kid would like and be impressed by.”

“Of course it is. I cut the apple up which is a superior way of eating it, and they get sugar. Not to mention, sometimes I let them have some chips."

Aaron's smile is less tense, and you feel satisfied. Nothing makes you feel better than knowing you can make someone important to you happier.

“I'll get started on that. Will Jack be joining us for dinner?"

"I thought that it would be a good idea for him to spend as much time as he wants with his friend. It gives me time to get you a contact list for his friends’ parents and that way you can have some free time.”

“If you insist. I already have free time. It's usually a few hours after he's in bed that you’re home. Plus he has stuff he likes to keep "secret" like things for you.”

The frown is back. "What about your dating life? I'm sure that whoever you're seeing wants to see you more."

“Yeah I'm sure that's what my ex would want. I'll make lunch real fast."

You make your escape to the kitchen as quick as you can. Talking about your ex unisn't something you're keen on doing. It was a messy ending.

You push all relationship thoughts out of your head. This is not the time or place to be thinking like that. It's lunch time, which means focusing on making food. Not that making a PB and J is hard.

The whole thing only takes you about ten minutes; you really should just buy an apple slicer. It would save you so much effort. In fact, Aaron's house was missing some of that stuff that would make housework easier.

You do your best to arrange the food on the plate, hoping it all fits. Balancing more than two plates is a struggle, so you choose to grab the drinks separately. Milk is hard to get out carpets if you don’t have the right materials. The smell will attract a pet and that's a hassle. At least it doesn't stain.

"Where do you want me to set this?"

Aaron shuffles the papers into neat piles, creating a space in the middle of the desk. You avert your eyes, not wanting to read the files. Even if they weren’t confidential, it isn't something that you’d want to read. After setting down the plates, you go to get the drinks.

The first few minutes of eating are done in silence. You’d like to get to know Aaron better, you just don’t want to come off as weird. It would suck if he misunderstood your intentions. Not that you wouldn’t date him.

"Something’s on your mind. Did you want to talk about it?”

"No. I think I’ll be okay in regards to what I was thinking about. On a different topic, what do you and Jack do together?”

Aaron looks a little ashamed at the question. You can sense he has a lot of guilt about how things have turned out. The look in his eyes makes you want to comfort him, but you don’t know what to say.

“If you ever want to talk about something, you can talk to me,” you offer. "I won't understand everything, but it's still good to get it out.”

“Maybe at a time when I don’t have so much paperwork,” he says with a sad smile. "I almost feel like-“

"Work has taken over your life? Tell me about it. I love kids, but there are times I wish I choose different job. Like the time all three kids had the flu, so I was cleaning up so much vomit.”

The rest of the meal is spent telling each other embarrassing work stories. Aaron shares things from all his team members, while you tell him the ridiculous things some kids have done. As the stories go on, you find yourself entranced by his laugh. The way his eyes crinkle and the corner of his lips turn up have your heart almost skipping a beat. For some reason, you start to feel self-conscience. Thankfully, the doorbell rings.

"I’ll get it. You probably need to get back to work," you say as you collect the dishes.

You stack the dishes, and carefully close the door behind you. You don't even bother going to the kitchen, opting to just set the dishes on a table nearby. Thankfully, the doorbell rings only the one time. You see the mom from earlier standing there, and swing open the door. Jack rushes in to hug you. You ruffle his hair as the mom starts to speak.

“I’m so glad that Aaron’s finally dating again. Poor man has been alone for too long,” she laments. “How long has it been?”

“I'm not sure. I didn't even know Aaron was dating," you reply with a shrug.

“Wait, you aren’t dating Aaron?” Her face is

turning red. "With how Jack talks about you, I thought maybe. He doesn’t talk about anyone but his dad like that.”

"It's Fine. Can’t blame you for what kids say," you offer with a smile. "No harm done.”

She doesn't say more, instead rushing back to her car. You don’t stop her, figuring that would make it worse.

You'll mention it to Aaron, hoping that he’ll be able to handle it.

For now, you'll be content to make Jack happy by pretending to be whoever he wants. After all, Aaron will have fixed it by tomorrow and there won’t be any more problems.

@rousethemouse @ash-whimsicalfanfic If anyone wants to be added to a tag list let me know!

#reader insert #criminal minds #aaron hotch #aaron hotch fic #aaron hotch fluff #aaron hotch imagine #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch x you #aaron hotchner #criminal minds aaron hotch

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tiffyfoundsomething · 2 years ago

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I haven’t been excited by a new toy in a while, but MGA’s new Miniverse got my attention.

These are available everywhere, including Amazon: https://amzn.to/3GGeEIt

However, that’s not always a good thing. It’s not always a positive aspect of a toy that catches my eye.

The big “what???” of these is that they’re marketed to kids age 8 and up, and contain UV resin.

Now..... Resin is

well it’s

...

It’s not for kids.

Allergies to uncured resin are common (both 2-part epoxy and UV resins) and can be severe.

There are lots of warnings in the packaging. I didn’t read them.

You should wear gloves and a respirator when working with any resin, even in a well ventilated area. There aren’t many proper respirators that fit kids....

Froggy on YouTube was too afraid to open her resin and instead used tinted Mod Podge which worked just as well.

I, however, am old and experienced with both types of resin (though no expert), unafraid of the possible reaction I could endure (I’m familiar with resin allergy and how it can be, so a good test subject) so I figured I’d give these a look to see just how bad an idea they might be for kids.

I did NOT wear gloves or a respirator while working on these kits in the name of science.

My first order was 3x of the Diner balls (there are 3x of the Cafe ones on the way).

I wanted a blueberry cheesecake.

None of my three were any type of cheesecake. I got this strawberry and cake parfait, choco-hazelnut spread and strawberry toast, and key lime pie.

First warning on this one: When I opened the little plastic bag that contained the “vanilla cream”, it smelled of UV resin and left my finger sticky. Some resin must have gotten on the outside of the bottle before it was bagged. It did make me itch at the time, which I was like “oh no....” but I’ll get back to that. One of the other balls had the same experience, but not all three.

The positives: Wow this is cute. There are screened veins on the strawberries, the whole berries have painted leaves, and the cake cubes are textured. These are very nice little minis, if a little under-detailed and obviously plastic.

Excellent for doll houses.

Every tiny bottle of resin has a big DO NOT EAT THIS sticker on it with information if you peel it off and unfold it.

The negatives: resin

You get tools, but they’re insufficient. I’ll address that later, also.

The little fruit and cake packages are difficult to open and I tossed my cake cubes across the desk. I am clumsy.

The resin bottle is VERY difficult to open. While this is good to prevent leaks (presumably), it did result in me and various tools being covered in resin trying to get it open.

Most of these items are a good scale for 1/6th dolls (Mini Me is a Live Action Beauty and the Beast Belle head on a curvy Barbie body). That bread is kind of big, those are bulk peanut butter, and that’s a LOT of vanilla cream.

Speaking of the bread...

I am NEVER opening this. Never. It’s too cute as it is. There is a TINY. BREAD. TAB.

Never.

That freed up one kit’s stuff to mix with the others.

These limes are transparent like they’ve been baked.

The whipped cream tube opens and there are all of these dollops inside, but I’m not the only one that thought they looked like little garlic! With a little toasty-colored dry brushing they could also be meringues.

Anyway, this was my “I’ve done this before.” set up. I didn’t tape down my tape (that’s a vinyl flooring sample, it’s an excellent base for working on UV resin), but it was fine for this small project.

I like to work on baby wipes because the damp, rough texture stops things from rolling or sliding around (it’s especially handy if you’re playing with glitter) and I keep another on hand to wipe my tools or my fingers as needed with the container nearby because I do go through a lot of wipes. Negative to baby wipes is that they’re prone to dropping strings everywhere.

Back to the tools.

You don’t want to touch uncured resin. The tools that come with these kits are playscale. Imagine trying to dig the key lime pie goo out of this jar with that tiny knife (though that set comes with a spoon). You’re going to be covered in resin.

There’s only about 1/3 of the jar full.

I used my normal resin doing spoon which is long and still had to stop to wipe my fingers a few times because I am clumsy.

The same with the tweezers.

These longer ones are much safer.

Each of these three kits has a different texture of resin. This is the “Nutella” which is thick and spreadable. I was using it as chocolate sauce since I didn’t want to use the bread. The vanilla cream was runny, and the key lime pie goo was in the middle.

I was doing this at 5 am in the winter so there was no sun. I used my nail lamp, so I can’t say whether these would set properly in the sun.

Having experience with UV resin, I did the key lime pie in two layers, curing the lower layer of just lime goo first so that the pieces wouldn’t get pushed too deep into said goo, then adding a second, thinner layer to set the fruit into.

I got this all over myself even with my longer, more appropriate tools.

Because the deco is plastic you can’t hit the resin with a flame to get rid of bubbles. Sometimes you can get them to pop if you blow on it hard and fast (POOF!) but I didn’t bother.

Obviously I switched mine up and made a strawberry limeade pie instead, using some of the Nutella to make a chocolate dipped strawberry on top.

As for the parfait, I am disappointed that the cake cubes on the bottom are obscured by the resin. It is very runny, ran down and around and covered them right up.

I also did this one in layers. I was wondering if the white resin would be able to cure because sometimes opaque tinted UV resin, especially white, can’t cure and you end up with a thin, cured crust and then that can be easily broken and uncured resin comes out everywhere.

This white resin cured fine. It’s not opaque.

I’m wishing I’d skipped the whipped cream on the parfait because the bright white of the whipped cream makes the transparency of the vanilla cream resin more obvious.

And this is what I’m left with!

If I hadn’t put the big strawberry on the key lime pie, it all would have fit into the pie crust container.

I cured the mostly empty insides of the vanilla cream and key lime goo containers but not the Nutella because I might come back and use that some day.

Whipped cream bits are back into the can.

I didn’t want to have empty fruit packaging so I pulled out some polyclay canes and refilled them.

Final thoughts

If you were to do these kits as intended, you’d be throwing away most of them. There was a TON of plastic bags inside, three layers of plastic outside, the pie crust and fruit containers and resin bottles/jars would be empty, there are many, many papers inside telling how to use the resin and warnings and the checklist and MGA’s usual “Give us your toy ideas for free!” flyer they include in everything these days.

I didn’t put them in the pictures but each kit does come with a small table that can snap into the ball to use as a dust-free display, and a doily or place mat depending on what you’re making.

I DID get resin all over my fingers. The resin DOES smell, but not as strong as my usual UV resin and it doesn’t sting my nose like my usual UV resin. If I were allergic, I’d be in pretty bad shape right now. As it is, I just feel kind of gross even though I’ve gotten as much off of my hands as I can.

Washing your hands won’t get this off, you need rubbing alcohol, which is where baby wipes come in handy.

Are these for kids 8+?

I mean, it depends on the kid. I’ve seen kids that can outcook adults.

Giving this to me at that age or even as a teen would be a mistake. It would end up in my hair, up my nose, on the dog, in my mom’s purse somehow.... I am clumsy.

It depends on the kid, but in general, no. There are very few respirators that properly fit children.

This is for teens and adults who already know how to handle UV resin.

#mga miniverse #miniverse #uv resin #resin #bling bag toy #mga

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whentherewerebicycles · 1 year ago

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processing some weight gain stuff under the cut

okay. in 18 weeks of pregnancy I have gained 15 pounds, which according to the guidelines I was given is a LOT more than I’m supposed to have gained at this stage. based on my starting weight I am only supposed to gain 15-25 lbs total across the entire pregnancy, which idk people seem to be mixed on whether that’s actually realistic but that is what the doctor says. in the last two weeks I went up 4 lbs, and that was with a terrible cold that totally killed my appetite and made it very easy to not indulge in holiday food (I couldn’t taste anything). I am exercising a little less (30-45 min daily walks instead of 45-75) but not like, SO much less yknow? and I have also been tracking my caloric intake on an app to make sure I’m not going over (although I think my real motivation there is if a doctor gives me a hard time about weight gain I’m going to be like yeah well here’s 15+ weeks of data on my eating habits so you tell ME what’s going on).

the point is that based on a calories in calories out model I shouldn’t be gaining this much weight this fast but I am. that’s just what seems to be happening! so I think I just have to LET GO and accept that my body is going to do whatever it thinks is best to support the pregnancy. I can still make good choices but I need to decouple the choices from the outcomes. or like, I need to accept that my good choices will produce good outcomes (I’ll be eating nourishing food and moving my body regularly!) but those outcomes will probably not include weight loss or a slowing of weight gain. here is what I will continue doing:

meal plan every week—I might want to start thinking about meal planning snacks too esp as I am feeling hungrier during the day

eat lots of fruits and vegetables every day

eat very limited amounts of processed foods and watch out for added sugars

walk briskly for 30-45 min a day

go to this hourlong weights class at least 2x a week (ideally 3x) and tack on 20-25 min of cardio on the bike after

I could also try going to the gym more often to do low-impact cardio—like trying to work in a couple days a week where I do 45 min on the elliptical while watching an episode of TV. I do find that in the past doing a lot of that mindless low effort activity seems to help with weight maintenance and is pretty easy to sustain because I’m just like, as long as I’m moving it counts! I don’t have to be pushing myself super hard! this is probably most doable for me on the weekends (and if I’m at the gym already it increases the chances that I might decide to run too).

ok so here’s a rough plan:

sat & sun: walk dogs (30-45 min x 2) + try to do 30 min x 2 of extra cardio while watching TV at the gym (or when liz is feeling better I can see if she wants to go together or do pregnancy workout videos)

mon & tues: weights class one of those days depending on work schedule + 20 min extra cardio one day + 30-45 min walk both days

wed: 30-45 min walk

thurs: this is my busy/long day with work stuff and rehearsal, but I can usually squeeze in a 20 min dog walk and could try parking far away and walking into work on days when it isn’t raining to get another 20+ min in

fri: weights class + 30-45 min walk

and I gotta remember I can make the walks less boring by 1) driving to a random neighborhood and walking from there and 2) talking to friends on the phone instead of just listening to stuff.

OKAY. the takeaway is: I DO NOT NEED TO FEEL GUILT OR SHAME ABOUT THE FACT THAT I AM PUTTING ON A LOT OF WEIGHT. I AM FOUR AND A HALF MONTHS PREGNANT! THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT MY BODY IS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING! I ALSO REFUSE TO LET DOCTORS OR THE INTERNET MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY ABOUT MY WEIGHT, BECAUSE I KNOW I AM MAKING HEALTHY CHOICES THAT ARE GOOD FOR MY BODY, MY BABY, AND MY MENTAL HEALTH. I ALSO WANT TO GENTLY DECOUPLE GOOD/HEALTHY CHOICES FROM SPECIFIC OUTCOMES. EATING WELL AND STAYING ACTIVE THROUGH MY PREGNANCY MAY NOT KEEP ME FROM GAINING “EXCESS” WEIGHT. BUT IT WILL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER IN MY BODY/SELF. IT WILL ENSURE THAT MY BABY IS GETTING LOTS OF GOOD NUTRIENTS. IT WILL HELP ME SLEEP BETTER AND FOCUS MORE AT WORK. IT WILL HOPEFULLY MAKE LABOR AND RECOVERY A LITTLE BIT EASIER TOO! I AM DOING ALL THE RIGHT THINGS AND IT IS OKAY THAT MY BODY IS NOT CONFORMING TO THE PRESCRIBED NORM. I TRUST MY BODY AND ASSUME IT HAS ITS REASONS!!!!!!!!!!!

#pregnancy tag

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tamayokny · 2 years ago

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“Get to know the blogger” game :D

I was tagged by @variantoutcast my beloved

• Share your wallpaper:

I have 2 separate wallpapers on the PC I’m using. My lockscreen is Asa Mitaka/Yoru from Chainsaw Man. My homescreen is the chapter 201 colorspread from Tokyo Revengers. I’ll share these at the end.

• Last song you listened to:

“Arepeggio” by Alexandros [Spotify] [Youtube]. This song is used in the Judgment opening sequence, but I’m just really feeling this song right now.

• Currently reading:

Tokyo Ghoul, vol. 12 by Sui Ishida

The Last Days of the Romanovs by Helen Rappaport

The Complete Poems of Emily Bronte by Emily Bronte [compilation published by Neeland Media]

• Last movie:

My dad and I watched some of The Shawshank Redemption Friday night. We didn’t watch nor finish it (my dad is a channel flipper) but we both love the movie.

• Last show:

The last show I finished was The Glory and Tokyo Revengers season 2. I’m currently watching Extraordinary Attorney Woo and I might start another anime, but I’m not sure.

• Craving:

...good question. I’d say comfort and sweets.

• What are you wearing:

A red-pink-white plaid PJ pants and a comfy gray t-shirt

• How tall are you?

Somewhere between 4′10″-4′11″

• Piercings:

I had my ear lobes pierced when I was younger, but I currently have no piercings. I think they’re cool, but they’re not for me.

• Tattoos

None yet! I want to get my twin sister’s name [who predeceased me] and our birth month flower. I don’t want to do a daisy (I think they’re boring), so I’m considering using the sweet pea flower instead.

I might follow a similar pattern for my grandfather who recently passed. I’ll get his name and a flower that represents his birth month, so either aster or morning glory.

• Glasses/contacts:

I wear glasses! I’m not a huge fan of contacts, I’m kind of terrified of them lol. I’m blind as hell and fun fact: my right eye is 3x weaker than my left eye.

• Last thing you ate:

My dad made me scrambled eggs and toast. It’s been hard to eat this week, so these light foods were good for me.

• Favorite color:

Reds and darker pinks

• Current obsession:

I’m trying to complete Lost Judgment, the game I’m currently playing.

I’m going to do more research on my family genealogy. Part of it brings comfort to me [my grandfather loved that stuff], but it’s genuinely interesting to look at that stuff. I’ll probably read more about German/German-American History after the semester is over.

• Pets:

I have an obnoxious German Shorthaired Pointer named Luna!

Favorite fictional character:

To quote Never: “Fuck. Evil question.”

Here are some of my favorite characters (and these are ones I can think of):

Muichiro Tokito (literally me but a fictional teenaged boy) and Tanjiro Kamado (Ellie says I’m like Tanjiro; it’s comforting) from Demon Slayer

Tobio Kageyama, Shinsuke Kita, and all of Inarizaki from Haikyuu!!

Lara Croft from Tomb Raider

Wanda Maximoff AKA Scarlet Witch from Marvel (saved the best for last)

• Last place you traveled:

I went to my grandmother’s house yesterday. We, along with my dad, his two siblings, their spouses, a cousin, and grandma’s husband got together to remember my grandfather who passed away on 03/28 (Tuesday morning). (This is the same grandfather I’m referring throughout this post.)

No pressure tags, but everyone is welcome to play and tag me.

@numbaoneflaya @rogueninja @meshla @malkinse @bpdanakins @sasukdyke @oatflatwhite

Okay, tag system kind of unreliable and I know I’m forgetting people so again: everyone is welcome to play and tag me <3

Wallpaper

Asa and Yoru from Chainsaw Man

Tokyo Revengers won’t upload but you can find the spread here.

#mads makes a text post #long post #interactive #about #tag games

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blonde-n-dirty · 3 months ago

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What’s going on, you’ve been quiet.

I don’t even know. Still pregnant, feeling sick, very very emotional, having a hard time eating. Had my 1st doc appt for the baby & got confirmation, I’m being monitored heavily for high blood pressure & im extremely high risk atp so they’re sending me to a high risk ObGYn I guess, so waiting for that referral & appt rn. I can currently do a sneak peak for the gender but I’m gunna wait a little longer. I put my mom on hospice & she’s fallen 3x in 2 days so they want to put her in a nursing home since I can’t give 24/7 care myself anymore, but my fam was raised to believe nursing homes is giving up on someone, so the second I told mom I couldn’t do this on my own, I got “so baby is more important & you just wanna give up & kill me. I’ll kill myself before I make it to a home.” Like ok what do I say/do w that?! I have no family to rely on & ask for help or guidance, my mom has a sister but she judges everything I do to care for these ppl & assumes she can do better, so will not even message her. So I have to do what’s best for ME bc nobody ever did or cared, I have to get called selfish when I know I’m not selfish I’m just being a mother which has always been my only dream, I have to deal w the guilt when she’s gone that I made her last months miserable bc I’m done overworking myself for someone who has never done the same in return. I told her she would’ve been dead 5-10yrs ago if I looked after myself 1st, so I saved her this long & she just doesn’t get it. Idk how to NOT have high BP in this environment.

So I just sit here feeling so guilty that I am over it, I have given up & chosen who matters more bc this fam has taken too much from me I won’t let them take my baby too. It’s just waking up & saying “let’s make it thru today” bc I know she could die tomorrow & I’ll miss her. But atp I’m done pouring energy into anything besides this fetus.

I’m overthinking constantly & feeling guilty & scared if I’m not nauseous or sleeping. There’s no happy moods anymore. Just surviving.

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wilderanch · 5 months ago

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My Dating Profile

TL;DR:

I work, I fix things, I love comedy, I can code, I cook, and I clean; I’ll massage you; I plan to adopt, have kids, or donate sperm in 0-2 years; I'm seeking monogamish connections but I'm open to anything; I like therapy, oversharing, crying during movies, and singing really loud; I have chickens and a very well developed community of chosen family.

A day in my life

7:20 - chores, walk with you, or snooze

7:50 - make bed, cold plunge for 20 breaths, 6 minute workout, cold plunge for 20 breaths, make protein shake, take a dozen supplements, pack car for work

8:15 - go to Piedmont or Alameda for very physical handiwork job

12:30 - mid-day rendezvous with you or eat at home - 45 minutes

5:15 - home again, sing Gaga in the shower, nap for 25 minutes

6:00 - cook dinner & prep lunches, go out, or start a sappy movie

7:00 - eat at home or out

9:00 - dim and redden the lights, have a nourishing intimate conversation with you or on the phone, give a massage if I can

10:30 - practice guitar and wind down

11:15 - lights out and cosleep with you if I can, using a 2 blanket system (separate but overlapping)

Values

Lateral thinking

Let’s be unconventional

Embracing eccentricity

Emotional and personal innovation

I believe human longevity research may confer us additional decades or centuries of health and fecundit Monogamish

I’ve been both monogamous and poly recently

Open to both and especially somewhere in between

Preferably monogamish: a very serious focus on each other, plus some fondness for other people

i.e. I talk often with and have extreme fondness for several female friends, but I don’t actively date or play with them, even if I do review nudes of them sometimes

That fondness and connection is non-negotiable but physicality with them or others is totally negotiable and fine either way Passion

Let’s hang out 2-3x/wk 1:1

Frequently assist in pursuit of your orgasm Non-sexual touch

Cosleeping with you most nights, ideally Community

Let’s hang out with each other’s friends 2-5x/wk Metacognition

Journaling during emotional conversations

Lots of experience with and wisdom from therapy

Efficient and honest processing of hard things Radical self expression

Words of affirmation dramatically enhance sex Leveraging risk

Investing in each other

Day trading volatile stocks like $MSTR

I have a moderate financial safety net in a family business Thrill

I have an encyclopedic knowledge of cars

I drive over 110 mph ~30s/wk Intimacy

Daily sharing of our inner lives Commitment

Let’s move in together in ~6 mos and get married and have kids in 12-24 mos Self knowledge

I’m high functioning ADHD

Self understanding begets self acceptance and compassion for others

I have a lot of training in biology and neuroscience

I heavily emphasize biological factors of mood, e.g. hangry, dopamine drop Respect

Very low tolerance for violent words out of either of our mouths

Healthy habits are self respect

Self respect begets respect for the beloved Radical self reliance

I’m literally a professional with 20 years experience in fixing anything around the house, or in the psyche :P

I dye and cut my own hair Vigilance

vs. willful blindness

My passion can sometimes make me feel Quixotic

Illusion can grip the best of us, in even the most mundane of ways Responsibility

Owning my actions and their effects on people

Raising kids Growth through adversity

Cool people do hard things Teamwork

I don’t care if it’s hard; we’ll get through it together

I want to be married but not with someone who’d be Machiavellian in a divorce Play

Every power couple generates many of their own cutesies, and carries the best ones forward from their past

What I’m working on, aka Zones of Proximal Development

Finding people I can dedicate all his energy to

What if we fostered kids

Looking for partners

Intending to delay exclusivity and intense romance until a mutual, solid, practical fit is clear

Trying to practice greater restraint

Falling in love more slowly

Delaying lots of sex a bit more

Assessing fit together rigorously and explicitly

Boundaries should be clear

Fighting fair

Using NVC even when it’s clunky:

thoughts ➡️ feelings ➡️ needs ➡️ requests

Taking marginally fewer risks

Engaging in local politics

Rejecting gaslighting propaganda

Thinking outside the box

Discussing issues one off

Co-living and community

Most of my friends live in Oakland East of the Lake

I’d like to end up neighbors with my friends

I like Alameda; my parents are in Berkeley

I’d like to share in child rearing with our friends

Music

DIY karaoke, singing in the car, jamming with friends and kids

Teaching myself guitar

I’m an expert whistler

I most enjoy singer songwriters and blink-182

I insist on making playlists together

Progeny and urgency

Feeling the clock ticking

I believe in the near-cosmic significance of participating in the unbroken chain of parents and progeny going back billions of years

I want to have enough kids that enough of them will probably have enough kids to probably have enough to have enough to have enough, etc.

I’m aware this may mean donating sperm; see below for my sperm donation pitch

If I donate sperm, I’d prefer to be known and 1-10% involved, like an uncle or helpful family friend

Adam’s Progeny Pitch

Hi there! I saw you’re looking for an AI donor. Here's my info in case you want to DM! Perhaps let me know if this checklist is useful or could use changes:

Early/first time donor, AI only; happy to ship

I have documentation for recent sperm count and STI tests

I live near San Francisco, CA

Interested in donating because I want to more deeply support and co-create the next generation, especially with LGBTQ community members, and I want to be part of the sacred and unbroken chain of parents and ancestors going back billions of years

I could potentially travel up to six hours by car; happy to do shipping

I’m white, with grey/blue eyes, dirty blonde hair, and mostly English ancestry, partly tracing back through the Midwest and East Coast to the Mayflower and the Battle of Bull Run. Oh, and 1/32 Choctaw Native American from Oklahoma

Age 34, 175 lbs, 5’9”, muscular, with broad hands, feet and gentleman parts

I have high educational attainment, with triple majors in undergrad in Philosophy, Psychology, and Cognitive Science, plus a Master’s in Biotechnology and Data Science

I’m handy, tech savvy, risk tolerant, and fairly financially successful

I am pansexual with a history of dating across the gender spectrum

I’m currently childless and dating

I feel excited and fully transparent to DM, even just for feedback

I’d like 1%-10% involvement: I want to be on good if infrequent terms with the parents over the years, and I’d be excited by 1 to 10 visits a year, or even some babysitting and community sharing

I may even want to setup and contribute to a financial trust for the child

I could pay for some costs, as I’m interested in shared responsibility, and a sense of trust and seriousness

Happy to DM and video call as much as you like. Ask me anything!

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jstorpoweruser · 1 year ago

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Gander | July 29th

Does every man think himself a god?

A– told me about killing a goose years ago when he worked on the river, a story he’d polished over and over telling to a crowd. “The goose story,” he chuckled, and talked about wringing the life out of an upset goose at the jeering of his coworkers. It was a challenge from his boss, it was when he was an impressionable teenager, he felt bad afterwards and made a goose stew so as not to waste the components.

He did not understand my reaction, my uncontrollable, uncomfortable laughter unable to mask my disgust.

“Why would you do that?” my throat constricting, “why would you tell me this? How would you think I would react?”

“Usually people think it’s funny,” he shakes his head –

“How would you kill my cat?”

“I wouldn’t kill your cat. I don’t like hurting animals. It’s different –.”

“You killed it with your hands,” I spat.

He did not understand, and he felt compelled to tell me about times he has been nice to an animal. About a dried-up lizard that he saved from a slow starvation in his kitchen grout the other day and placed in a flower pot outside.

Proof that he can show compassion, if he deems the creature deserving – and already I am editing, apologizing, pointing out the hypocrisy that I eat meat and feel so repulsed by his pointless slaughter. That I am hysterical; that I am hormonal. This is what I do, this is what I am -- a woman that wilts to the ideals of whatever personality is strongest. I’ll mold myself into whatever you want, if that means you’ll like me. I cannot undo the surer knot in my stomach, a sensation that if I ever am vulnerable with a man again, he’ll consider himself the master of his life and mine, and that I will once again cease to be a person but instead a side-character in someone else’s story. An optional pawn for god to play. A creature to move to the shaded soil if it has properly submitted, and otherwise to wring the life from. I cannot shake this feeling that all of life is either abstaining from love or letting it choke you to death.

Acceptance Criterion

1. Attend a new social meetup near your new apartment

2. Rock climb 3x this week

3. Finish the book on the opioid crisis

#personal

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diariesof-kg · 2 years ago

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The Heartbreaker Continued...

Tmobile won’t let me disconnect my phone line, what a damn joke. And IG keeps denying me of deactivating my IG. I just came back from seeing my kids. It somehow healed a part of me. The innocence of children is honestly a beautiful thing. It’s the ultimate forever love you’ll always get.

I noticed everyone was on their phones and well I wasn’t. The consumption of social media is really something toxic. Everyone also noticed my energy was way off even though I smiled a lot. My best friend mom was like “...are you okay? Are you good...” I wanted to break but couldn’t. It’s like one of those moments of do not speak about that forbidden thing. I want to go to the beach tonight. I feel the urgency to get there. I am kind of glad the plans are cancelled for tomorrow. Hearing my mom say “Be strong...” stings. She knows I’ve attempted to take my life 3x and the next time will be the last. The last conversation, I cried when she said “be strong Ke’Anna, you have to be...” if anything should happen to her. Maybe that’s why she refuses to come see me? In my dreams I see her feet never her face. Maybe she’s scared that if I come in contact I’ll let go of this world. I’ve been strong and I’m tired. Everyday I wake up and I am in pain. I swear I don’t want to be in this vessel anymore. It’s a weird type of pain. And look at me venting my thoughts out. Look at me disappearing, and yet, “I am a ghoster and a bad friend” Lol.

When shit hits the fan, no one has my back at all. I honestly DO NOT understand why I am so bothered. That’s why I need to go away. I am beyond vulnerable at this point. Accountability also bothers me. No one is willing to admit their wrongs and apologize. I feel like once my mom died, I became very weak and everything bothers me. Maybe I am scared of being alone for once, when at first I wasn’t because she was here. Maybe I am scared of my subconscious? Maybe I am seeking things to feel a void? What if I have become broken (like everyone else) and seeking a healer? I feel like a disease walking around infecting those around me unintentionally. I feel ugly inside. This friend thing boiled everything over for me. Capricorns are the goats but we feel things too. We have emotions too. We hurt too.

I do be use to people’s actions, but a person can only handle so much. The fact that my sister came and was so busy visiting her friends was hurtful. I was only allowed two days and that barely worked. I wanted to have lunch with her and my girlfriend but my sister schedule just didn’t allow that and she wasn’t going to readjust anything. *tears* Maybe I’m too sensitive? I get everyone has their own life, but the fact my own sister spared me 2 days, real life hurts. I have to take care of everything regarding our mother and my brother, meanwhile she has no responsibilities. That’s why I always question, what am I doing here? I am here to do what others are not willing to do. Then she poured the drama on me and didn’t pour back into me at all. It’s like Ke’Anna why are you even upset at this point, you should be use to this. I shouldn’t be use to anything at this point, I should be respected and appreciated. So many things bother me at this point, I just want to disappear. My feelings are always denied and never heard, that’s why I don’t speak about them, I’d rather write them out. I feel like as a child it’s always been this way, but then once I interacted with other humans, it’s still the same, friendships, relationships, family.....

I wish people would stop seeing me as a sexual object. I can’t even begin to express those thoughts. I’d never forget when, this chick my friends named her Candy Cane was so upset, and said “you could get it, aint no way no one is fucking you...” that’s for a different blog post, but I’ll gather those screenshots from my old phone. Some random number, sent nudes, asking me to eat their p*ssy. Anyone would be delighted to have things like this happen, but if you knew what happened to me as a child, you’d be a bit more respectful. Plus the other chick sexually assaulting me (for another blog). Phew....there is so much bottled up it’s starting to leak. I enjoy intimacy with love making with the person I choose to be with. I am not interested in having sex with random folks or be enticed by inappropriate comments that come from people I am not in a relationship with. The sad thing about is, I can’t ask no one I am friends with who liked me to stop by, because I am too scared of being touched on and not knowing what to do. I can’t even hug folks without them being turned on. It’s a sick world seriously. Although I’d never let these people know where I live, it be the thoughts sometimes, I just be needing a friend, not to be fcked on. I can’t deny how people feel, but I wish it wasn’t towards me, this is why deep inside I just want to be loved properly. I wish people would stop having sex dreams about me and telling me, I gag every time. And the reason I don’t reply, because when I tell people, its inappropriate it turns into this big deal and I am the bad guy.

I stopped posting on social media, because I don’t like the comments or DMs sometimes and I know that’s weird, but for some reason compliments make me feel weird.

To end this blog ----

I wish I wasn’t as weak right now. Feeling numb, is like not caring if you live or die. Not caring about eating, just existing at this point. I need to go to the beach, but I can’t see at night. I want to be loved properly. I think that’s why it’s hard for me to say, “I love you...” because I know I mean it, but others may not. “I love you so much...” she said just to tell lies on me and become the victim. “I love you key...” just to accuse me of messing with your best friend, and interfering with your baby daddy. Can someone please say, “I love you” without the bullshit being attached.

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avinaccia · 3 years ago

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A Completely Objective and Logical Ranking of Every Hetalia Character Song

New character songs are dropping, I have too much time on my hands, let’s go.

Also here’s a Youtube playlist for the ~✨nostalgia✨~

Bring it on in the tags

71. Ah Legendary Class⭐The Awesome Me Highway [Prussia]: Absolutely tearing it up on the drums and on the vocal cords alike (I pray for Atsushi Kousaka). Great for the memes.

70. Happy Thoughts Museum [???]: This is listed as an official song but I had literally never heard of the title. Then I listened to it and BAM! Smack back to 2013 watching the teasers for the show on Funimation. Not sure I’d count it as a character song though...

69. (Nice) My Song that is written by me for me [Prussia]: Deafened me but I can appreciate the industrial grind.

68. My House is...Quiet. ~With the Trolls~ [Norway]: I have never heard this song, nor can I find any version of it online. By default it goes here and I am so sorry Norge.

67. Make a Wish to Santa♪ [Sealand]: The discordant notes and childish exuberance only serve to make this sound like a demonic plea to Santa to eliminate the singer’s enemies.

66. Heaven and Hell on Earth [Rome]: Rome sounds like he’s been in the corner of a restroom. Extra points for the metal version, minus points for the fact that the beach scene was replayed like 1764 times.

65. Canada Complete Introduction [Canada]: Quiet af until Kumacheerio shows up and blows out your speakers. they did you dirty my darling 😔

64. It’s Easy!!! [America]: I don't think any video of this has ever stayed up for more than 20 seconds. Sounds cool, but like I was listening to 20 different genres at once, someone make him calm down.

63. Bù Zàiyì the Small Stuff ☆ [China]: I cannot for the life of me find the complete song anywhere, clips have a cool beat though

62. Let's Boil Hot Water♪ [Italy]: Exactly what it says on the tin..though a bit too close to elevator music for my tastes.

61. The Fragrance of Early Summer [Japan]: Very ‘from the books’ Japan-esque song

60. Peace Sounds Nice…[Baltic Trio]: All well and good until the radio demon shows up

59. W●D●C ~World Dancing~ [America]: How a song can sound like it’s from 4 different decades at once is beyond me

58. Overflowing Passion [BFT]: This is just drunken karaoke and I have 0 clue what’s going on #iconicforallthewrongreasons

57. Ren●Ren●Renaissance♪ [Rome+Chibitalia]: Wholesome Grandpa with Grandson content - barring the fact that Italy sounds on the verge of a nervous breakdown and Rome has had too much wine.

56. Roma Antiqua [Rome]: Similar energy to any one of China’s songs - there’s a part of the song where it sounds like he’s singing in the shower, and I will never not laugh at [CENSORED]

55. Country From Where the Sun Rises, Zipangu [Japan]: Very chill, very Japan, but just meh for me.

54. Moon Over Emei Shan [China]: Good message, okay song.

53. My Friend [England]: What a mind palace you must have Mr. Kirkland

52. With Love, from Iceland [Iceland]: Three words: Heavy. Metal. Puffin.

51. Having Friends is Nice...♫ [Russia]: Russia is the cutest thing ever

50. Mm. [Sweden]: Smooth transition from WWE Smackdown to shopping at IKEA.

49. Why don’t you come over? ~Beyond the Northern Lights~ [Iceland]: I don’t want to be mean but...this does sound like the second closing theme to an anime whose first closing was much more popular (à la Soul Eater)

48. Gakuen☆Festa [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Sounds like a 60s song of the summer but oh dear their voices do not go together. Hella cute though.

47. Wa! Wa!! World Ondo [Main Cast]: One time I travelled 10 hours in a coach bus with a bunch of teenagers to a city of note in my country, and the only souvenir I bought was the fucking PAINT IT WHITE DVD. Perfectly chaotic, UN ĐĕùX~~

46. In the Bluebell Woods [England]: In the album cover for this song he’s holding a guitar but this is not a rock song. Still has ‘running through the hills’ levels of dramatism though.

45. Poi Poi Poi♪ [Taiwan]: You’re telling me that Taiwan, someone whose has *ONE LINE* in Beautiful World (which is criminal tbh what kind of representation-) managed to get an eNTIRE CHARACTER SONG???????

44. White Flame [Russia]: There’s something to be said for a song that is 3x the length of any Hetalia episode

43. Ich liebe… [Germany]: Baking cakes for your friends has never been so wholesome.

42. We Wish you a Merry Christmas [America, China, England, France, Russia]: Nice to see they’ve gotten their shit together since United Nations Sta-hmm.

41. Ah, Worldwide à la mode [France]: Sounds like a Disney Princess song, hard not to picture France frolicking in a field of flowers.

40. Che Bello! ~My House is the Greatest!⭐~ [Italy]: Would not be out of place in an advertisement for Sea World.

39. May You Smile Today [Japan]: THE feel good song of the summer

38. Let’s Look Behind the Rainbow [Italy]: I will protect you.

37. I'm your HERO☆ [America]: “Anyone who’s sad or sullen will be arrested” did NOT age well.

36. Mein Gott! [Prussia]: Alternating headphone effect at the beginning is cool, so is the confidence...the actual singing on the other hand...

35. Nihao⭐China [China]: Listen, all of China’s character songs are great, I just can’t vibe with this one like some of the others.

34. Pechka ~Light My Heart~ [Russia]: I’m still having difficulty wrapping my head around the fact that this and Winter were released at the same time.

33. Pukapuka⭐Vacation [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Seems just a bit too much like they’re running on a treadmill that’s picking up speed and trying to sing at the same time. Peppy.

32. Santa Claus is Coming to Town [Germany, Italy, Japan]: This is unironically the best song sung by this trio; can only vibe with for two months out of the year though.

31. Excuse Me, I Am Sorry [Japan]: Japan’s character traits speedrun. Gives me barbershop quartet vibes for some reason but is catchy as hell.

30. The Story of Snow and Dreams [Russia]: A superhero anime opening in the making

29. England’s Evil Demon Summoning Song [England]: Sir that is not how you roast a marshmallow, don’t cut yourself on that edge.

28. Moi Moi Sauna♪ [Finland]: Exactly the type of song you’d expect and it’s wonderful

27. United Nations Star⭐ [America, China, England, France, Russia]: This isn’t as much of a song as it is a four minute struggle for everyone to sing without America yelling every 5 seconds...Like a particularly musical episode of Hetalia.

26. Paris is Indeed Splendid [France]: Paris-pa-pa-pa-paris

25. Absolutely Invincible British Gentleman [England]: Poppy, rocky, polka-dotty

24. Vorwärts Marsch! [Germany]: To quote the comment section: “This sounds like a German version of I’ll Make a Man out of you.” There’s some truth to that.

23. Hamburger Street [America]: The product of America’s rapper phase. 8/10 because he’s trying so hard and because I can unironically sing along to all of this.

22. Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy [Hong Kong]: A song that would absolutely destroy the ankles of anyone in DDR.

21. I Am German-Made [Germany]: There was once a version that had Germany and Prussia singing at the same time and it sounded positively demonic and Broadway could never

20. La pasión no se detiene ~Unstoppable Passion~ [Spain]: Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping...

19. Fall in Love, Mademoiselle [France]: Sounds like it should be in Mozart Opera Rock, I have kiss kiss falled in love.

18. Embrace the Très Bien Moi [France]: This is the definition of SELF LOVE PEOPLE.

17. Carrot and Stick [Belarus&Ukraine]: Absolutely DRIPPING in 2000s power ballad energy. The type of song that plays on repeat in the mind of the widow whose millionaire husband ‘mysteriously disappeared’ (and the only legit character song ever acknowledged by the anime)

16. C.B.C (Cowboyz Boot Camp) Vol. 1 [America]: AH MAH GAWWDDD

15. Winter [Russia]: Heavy metal fever dream and the perfect song for an angst-ridden teenager

14. Seychelles Here ⭐ Vacation Island [Seychelles]: UN👏DER👏RA👏TED SONG👏OF 👏THE 👏SUM👏MER👏

13. Nah, it will settle itself somehow [Romano]: One day I aspire to reach this level of chill

12. Let’s Enjoy Today [England]: I will never not feel happy when listening to this.

11. Einsamkeit [Germany]: Ludwig manages to air every single one of his worries about not being good enough compared to his friends and always being perceived as mean or uptight when he’s actually just a softie and now my heart hurts. 💔

10. Aiyaa Four Thousand Years [China]: A very poignant and beautiful song about the passage of time and the inevitability of its passing; comparable to an ancient ballad complete with explosive crescendos and meaningful lyrics.

9. Bon Bon Bon❤️C’est Bon C’est Bon! [France]: Peppy, cheerful, adorable, groundbreaking; has been my alarm tone for six years and I’ve yet to tire of it. 9/10 The moaning interspersed throughout has been an interesting wake-up call.

8. Let’s Enjoy! Let’s Get Excited! Cheers! [Denmark]: This is on par with Everytime we Touch by Cascada in terms of rage potential unlocked (the good kind)

7. Dream Journey [Japan]: Whoever’s playing the shakuhachi is absolutely KILLING IT. Dramatic, wonderful, great metaphors.

6. Gourmet’s Heart Beginner Level [China]: Absolute banger, I’m a vegetarian but this would inspire me to eat shumai.

5. Always with you...Nordic Five! [Nordic FIVVVVVEEEE]: Everyone harmonizes beautifully except for Denmark. Extremely catchy, number placement seemed appropriate.

4. Pub and GO! [England]: I love this trash man

3. Maji Kandou⭐Hong Kong Night [Hong Kong]: If you thought Denmark’s song was a banger JUST YOU WAIT. I WILL BLOW OUT MY SPEAKERS LISTENING TO LO-HA-SU.

2. Steady Rhythmus [Germany]: THIS SONG IS METAL AF. Seriously, if it can be classified as ‘hardcore’ by my father and his group of 50-somethings who have decided to single-handedly gatekeep the metal and hardrock genres, it can do anything.

1. The Delicious Tomato Song 🍅 [Romano]: Beautiful, absolutely awe-inspiring, poignant, catchy lyrics with an extremely deep meaning that only years of meticulous research and analysis can unlock, Romano I love you.

BONUS: Closing Songs

5. Hatafutte Parade (World Series)

4. Hetalian⭐Jet (The World Twinkle): The song is good, the dancing is cursed

3. Chikyuu Marugoto Hug Shitainda (World⭐Stars)

2. Marukaite Chikyuu (Hetalia: Axis Powers): nE NE PaPA

1. Mawaru Chikyuu Rondo (The Beautiful World)

98 notes · View notes

unnecessarywriting · 4 years ago

Text

Tolerate It (Part 2) - Harry Potter x Reader

A/N: So this is a little long, like 3x as long as part 1, but you know things happen! I hope you all like it and thank you for the love on part 1. Warning, it is a little angsty, but it gets fluffy at the end. Remember to send in requests!! Enjoy!

ALSO Italics are flashbacks!!!!

Part 1

Tolerate It (Part 2)

~ Your Morning ~

The night was spent with shots of firewhiskey and tears. There was nothing that could really prepare you for the feeling in your chest. Your body was convulsing from the sheer torment you had put it through. Luckily, you had someone who was there for you, but it didn’t make the pain ache any less.

When you woke up in the morning, your head ached from the alcohol and the crying. Your face was puffy from crying relentlessly, and your throat was sore from the inevitable coughing that comes with an intense session of tears and wails. Even your lungs were tired from all of the hyperventilating. You grabbed the shirt on your body pulling it to your nose, but much to your surprise you weren’t too familiar with the scent. That was when you acknowledged that your friend let you sleep in hers. When was the last time that you weren't wearing Harry’s shirts? These thoughts needed to leave you. You deserved to move on and be celebrated for everything that you are.

You made breakfast for your friend, and now roommate. She thanked you and complimented your cooking skills. It felt foreign to feel recognized for something so mundane. She offered to clean up, which you graciously accepted. You changed into some of her clothes so that you could go to work. You had managed to take half the day off, but the distraction from, well, let’s just refer to him as he-who-shall-not-be-named. Ironic right? Our hell has been killed, and yet a new one arises in his place. I would never have thought that he would become mine.

All throughout your shift, you tried to keep your focus on work. “Be productive” became your mantra. Eventually, however, your time at work came to a close, and you knew that you had to get your things. You apparated and appeared in front of your old front door. Cautiously, you opened it. You knew he would be at work, but a small piece of you hoped that he would be moping around, waiting for your return. When you found nothing but silence, you couldn’t tell if you were relieved or disappointed.

You knew how much time you had to gather everything you owned, but you didn’t want to risk him coming home and finding you, so you rushed. With everything packed up, you took a look around. The place looked quite empty. When you two had moved in, a lot of the decorating was your own doing. You wanted it to feel warm and inviting, despite who you had felt living there. Now, it looked like how the place felt. Your eyes glanced into the kitchen and you saw the dishes, piled high in the sink. Of course, he probably thought that you would come back and have them done. You scoffed and grabbed your things. When you arrived at your new place, you took everything you could and put it into your room. Emotionally, you were drained, so when you felt your eyes closing, you knew that your day had ended.

~ Harry’s Morning ~

After you left, Harry stayed at the table. He pushed the food around his plate until his stomach warned him to finally eat. He was lost in his angry thoughts. Who were you to accuse him of such stupidity. He loved you, and he knew that he made it clear to you all of the time. You were just being obnoxious and clingy. You would get over it and all would return to normal. That night, he piled the dishes into the sink and walked into his study. He scribbled a letter to Ginny, where he explained how you walked out on him, and how you accused him of such atrocious behavior. Afterwards, he went to bed, feeling slightly colder than normal.

The following morning, he was greeted by a chill. He looked over and saw your side of the bed unslept in. Of course you didn’t return in the middle of the night. He walked out into the kitchen expecting to see you there, but he was greeted with silence. The room smelt of the dinner you cooked the night before. He rolled his eyes to himself, and began to make breakfast. As he placed the bacon on the pan, the scent brought him back to one morning at Grimmauld Place.

“Harry!” You exclaimed as Harry hugged you. “I’m trying to cook. Leave me be!” You giggled.

“But I can help. I used to cook all the time for the Dursley’s. Then we can be done quicker and spend more time together.” His smile was so bright, and his tone remained mischievous.

“Precisely Harry. You don’t have to be a slave anymore. Let me do this for you.” You turned around in his embrace after flipping the bacon. “Besides, after we are done with school, I’m gonna cook breakfast for you every morning just to show you how much I love you.” As you finished that sentence, you booped his nose and turned back to your cooking. Harry just smiled into the crook of your neck, fantasizing about his life with you.

After you finally managed to kick him out of the kitchen, he caught sight of his godfather, who offered a knowing smile.

“You know Harry, she’s a keeper.” Harry nodded in response, and turned around to watch you work.

“She sure is Sirius.”

You had kept your word. Every morning that you were together, you cooked breakfast for him. He ate in silence, like he did while he was with you, except this time, it felt different, almost eerie. He piled the rest of the dishes into the sink and finished getting ready for work. He wasn’t missing any of his shirts. That was unusual. He apparated to his job, trying not to think too much.

“Hey mate.You look awfully tired today.” Ron was too joyful for his taste.

“Didn’t sleep well.” Was all he said.

By lunch time, Ron had figured out that something was wrong. He had seen his friend when he was tired. Something was bothering him, and his irritable behavior was starting to piss him off.

“You gonna tell me what’s wrong, or are you gonna continue acting like a prat?” Ron always had a way of getting the truth out of him.

“Y/N left last night.” Harry huffed.

“Whatever happened, I’m sure she’ll be back. She loves you.”

“Loved seems more accurate. She said I've been neglecting her.” As Harry spoke, it seemed like he became angrier with every word. “She accused me of not loving her or appreciating her, and then she walked out.”

“Harry, is it possible that she was right? Those feelings don’t just come out of nowhere. I mean the other night at Mum’s, you didn’t really look pleased to have her around. Maybe you should go and talk to her.” Ron thought he was being reasonable with his words. He wanted to side with his friend, but he was worried about you. You had been friends at school, and after the war, you had stopped talking to him and Hermione. He hadn’t seen you a lot recently, and he couldn’t but be concerned with you behavior the other night. You used to be bright and bubbly.

“All I’m saying Harry, is that Ron is reasonable about his fear of spiders, although you can be a bit of a scaredy cat,” you joked while nudging Ron.

“Y/N I am not. Any fear I have is reasonable. Plus you didn’t see how big those spiders were. Plus I was 12. Even Fang was scared.”

“Yeah, and Fang is a scaredy cat too. Ask Hagrid. Now,” you jumped up from your spot and grabbed his fork, “admit that you’re a scaredy cat, and I’ll give you back your fork.”

“This isn’t funny. I’m very brave. I’m in Gryffindor.” You started to wander away from the table, giggles spilling from your lips. “Y/N, please c’mon. I’m hungry. Oh, fine! I’m a scaredy cat, okay? Terrified of giant spiders. Is that what you wanted? Now give me my fork back.” By the end, he was yelling in the great hall, and you were laughing uncontrollably at his desperate confession. You handed him his fork and continued to giggle.

“Brave sure, but you are pretty dumb Ron. There was another fork right there,” you said pointing to where he was sitting a moment before. Harry and Hermione just facepalmed at their friends’ shenanigans.

Your silent behavior was unlike you, and he knew there was something going on, but he didn’t get the chance to ask you about it. Harry left the conversation, frustrated with his friend, and he returned to his job. He needed to get his mind off of what you said the night before.

On his return home, he half expected you to be back, waiting for him to come home so you could talk through things. He was met with a cold emptiness. Your things were gone. He rushed into your bedroom, and saw that half of the room was bare. There wasn’t an ounce of you left to grasp onto. He realized that you weren’t just in a fight. You were gone, and it was all his fault. He put his head down on what used to be your pillow. Your perfume was light, but the slightest whiff let him feel you. He hadn’t felt you in so long. You’ve always been there, but he wasn’t close enough to you to get the scent. You were right. He had been neglecting you. His tears began to fall as he held onto the only bit of you he had left.

“Look at what I bought! This is going to be perfect Harry.”

“Darling, you’ve done too much.”

“How dare you? This is so very important. When people come over, they need to be welcomed. They need to be in awe over how amazing I am at decorating. This is our place Harry! It needs to be perfect.” He was aware of how serious you were which made him smile to himself. You could be a lot to handle sometimes, but that’s what he loved about you.

“As long as you’re here with me, it will be perfect.” He nuzzled into you and breathed in the beautiful scent you omitted. You really were perfect.

Are perfect. You are perfect, and he just let you walk out the door. Worse than that, he allowed you to think less of yourself. He’s been through a lot of heartbreak and pain, but this was worse. Hell, he even died, but this was worse. He stayed in bed the rest of the night. He couldn’t bring himself to eat. Eventually, he fell asleep.

~ Your Response ~

You were doing better than you expected. You weren’t happy by any means, in fact you still cried yourself to sleep, but you were better. You worked your regular schedule, and you really put everything you could into your work. Your roommate was great, although you knew she would be. You two were friends. You still hadn’t fully unpacked yet. It felt as if you did, it would really be over, and you weren’t ready to let go just yet.

One morning, you felt that you needed to go out and do something productive. So, you went to Diagon Alley. You owe yourself a little shopping spree, and maybe you would get a gift for your roommate to thank her for allowing you to move in on such short notice. You had made your way through different stores. You found yourself outside a bookstore. You smiled at it, but it felt bittersweet.

“Is there a reason we need more books? C’mon dear, you aren’t Hermione. You don’t need to compete for who has more books. We barely have space for them.” Harry never understood why you wanted to buy all of these books.

“There is a very good reason Harry. I just haven’t told you yet.” You continued looking through the shelves, trying to find a book that jumped out at you and told you that it was a must read.

“What do I have to do to find out?” He was watching you in awe.

“Find a book you want, and I mean really want. I don’t want you just picking up some random book. And then, I’ll be ready to tell you.” He took the challenge and began looking for the book. After about twenty minutes, he returned back to you, book in hand. You looked at it and smiled at him.

“So, why are we buying these?” You laughed and walked to the counter to check out.

“I said I would be ready to tell you. I never said that I would.” Harry playfully rolled his eyes and followed after you.

You never did get to tell him your reasoning for buying all of those books. A shame really, but now that you two aren’t together, they don’t mean anything. You sighed and walked to get some ice cream.

“Y/N?” You turned in the direction of the voice. A part of you wanted to just leave her standing there, but you knew that she would be persistent.

“How can I help you Ginny?” You tried to sound polite, but you were bitter.

“How are you? Harry told me about your fight.” Of course he told her.

“I’m fine. Now if you don’t mind, I was gonna get some ice cream and get home.” Except, it wasn’t home to you.

“Well, I was gonna get some ice cream too, so let’s get some together. It’s my treat.” You didn’t want to eat with her, but free ice cream was not something you were about to pass up. You nodded your head in response. You both ordered your ice cream, and took a seat outside.

“I heard Harry’s side, but I think he left some things out. I was talking to Ron, and he said that you looked like you were going through something before your fight. We’re all worried about you two. I know that I may have overstepped a little bit, and I’m sorry, but you two are perfect for each other. I don’t think that I can handle being what came between you two.” You scoffed. She wasn’t at fault. Sure she was a part of why you were mad, but it wasn’t her fault that Harry stopped loving you.

“Listen Ginny, I don’t want you to feel like this is your fault, because it isn’t. Harry stopped caring about me a long time ago, and I finally realized it. I gave him everything, and he brushed me off. He was just dealing with me being there. I left because I deserve to be happy. I may not be there yet, but I can’t go back to be treated like a maid.” She seemed to understand. The two of you talked a little longer about how you were, her life, and her family. Eventually, you parted ways. You felt a little better knowing that she didn’t find you selfish or crazy.

That night, you two didn’t cry yourself to sleep. You were still sad, but there were no more tears.

You were awoken to a familiar owl at your window. You grabbed the letter and opened it.

Dear Y/N,

I know you hate me, but I think we should talk. There are things I need to say, but mostly,

I need to apologize. In person. Please come back. Tonight, 7:30.

Love,

Harry

~ Harry’s Response ~

Harry was miserable. His days at work were unproductive. Ron was concerned, but he didn’t know what to do. He had never seen his best friend this distraught. He was beginning to look like Sirius did when he escaped from Azkaban. Harry would come home and whimper at the lack of you in his home. It used to be your home. The place was a mess. If you had seen it, you would probably scold him for being so irresponsible.

It was a Saturday. He had nothing to do but sit around at home. He walked into his study, and found the pile of books in the closet. You complained that he had the study to himself, so you stole the closet from him claiming that you deserved it. He complied. Since you left, he hadn’t opened it. He was terrified of what it could possibly be, but his hand continued to the knob. Inside were all of your books. You kept buying more whenever you two would make your way to Diagon Alley. He never found out why you bought them, but he still wondered. He opened a few of them, and recognized your handwriting in the margins. They mostly consisted of your reactions to things that you read, or even just cute doodles that matched the story.

He held a couple of them to his chest as he thought of you. He didn’t know how long he was sitting there. He was only interrupted by the call of his name. He reluctantly got up and looked for the owner of the voice.

‘Blimey Harry. You’ve destroyed this place.” Ron was there. Of course. Ginny stood beside him, looking disappointed.

“Harry, we need to talk about Y/N. You’ve been insufferable without her, and she’s struggling too,” Ginny stated.

“How do you know how she’s doing?” Harry was really worried.

“Ginny met with her today at Diagon Alley. Harry, when was the last time you cleaned at all? This place is absolutely disgusting.” Ron winced at the sight of the kitchen.

“Harry, I’m gonna cut right down to it. You need to talk to her. You are killing yourself over your mistakes, and she is struggling to deal with how you treated her. Merlin, Harry, how could you let her down. Did you know that she really believes that you stopped loving her? The damage you’ve caused is almost irreversible, but I think you both need to talk. If not to sort things out, then to give you both closure.” Ginny had a point.

“I don’t even know how to talk to her. I don’t want her to see me like this either.”

“Mate, we don’t want to see you like this either, but we can fix that,” Ron exclaimed.

“She said that she is living with a Y/F/N.” Harry’s eyes lit up. He knew where that was.

“Harry, you are going to shower, and we are gonna start cleaning up this,” he motioned to the room, “and then you are gonna tell her to meet you here tomorrow night. It’s the least you could do,” Ron finished with a hopeful look. Harry nodded and retreated to the bathroom.

~ Together at Last ~

You were nervous to say the least, but you gathered yourself and apparated to the place you once called home. You knocked on the door. It felt foriegn, but you didn’t feel like you could just enter a place you no longer lived. You heard rustling from behind the door, and what you thought was a curse. Then the door opened, and you saw a slightly disheveled Harry smiling awkwardly at you. You returned the smile but stayed where you were standing.

‘Oh, come in.” He moved out of the way and closed the door after you. There was a smell in the house that you could only describe as burnt food.

“I’m sorry, I was trying to cook for you, but I think I lost that ability, and well, it’s not entirely edible. I ordered a pizza a little while ago. It should be here any minute.” Almost as if on cue, there was another knock at the door. He rushed to get it, while you stood observing the place. It was clean, but it looked dark and empty.

You both walked over to the table where he placed the pizza. You sat down cautiously and eyed all of his clumsy motions. He was reminding you of how he was in school. Completely unaware of how to act in front of a woman. It was kind of funny, but you couldn’t bring yourself to smile. When he sat down, he looked up at you with a nervous glint in his eyes.

“I guess I should start by apologizing. I have a lot to say, so I ask that you allow me to speak this time. First of all, I am an idiot for so many reasons. The things I said to you that night were cruel and unreasonable, and I cannot put in words how sorry I am. You were right. I have no excuse for the way I treated you. I’ve been thinking, a lot actually, about us. I need you to know that I have never stopped loving you.”

“Harry-” you began.

“Let me finish please. You are the greatest thing to ever happen to me, and losing you broke me. I need you in my life, not as a caretaker, but as my equal. I need you by my side because you make life so much better. I don’t know what happened, but as cliché as it sounds, I realized just how much I need you and love you after you left. I know you waited so long for me, and I did nothing but push you aside. I’m promising you now, if you take me back, and you come home to me, then I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I will show you everyday how much I love you more than anything. So please darling, come home.” His eyes were glossing, and you could tell that he was being honest. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen him this vulnerable.

“Harry, I hoped everyday that you would stop being cold, and would turn to me and confess just how much you love me. It never happened. I want to be with you because I love you, but I can’t help but be scared that you will resort back to your old ways. I don’t think I can take being someone that is underappreciated and unloved. I need time.” You were being honest with him. You couldn’t afford to push your feelings aside anymore.

“Will you take me back? I want to start fresh, but I want you here.” His desperation was clear.

“Okay, but I need things to be slow for a while. I don’t trust you, but I love you.” He jumped up from his seat and walked over to you. His arms wrapped around your body. It had been so long since you were in his arms. Your scent made him sigh in relief, while his warmth let you relax into the embrace. This is what you had waited for. It had been so long, but it had been worth it.

The following day, you both had taken the day off from work to move you back in and spend quality time together. You had stayed the night wrapped up in his arms. It was the best night of sleep either of you had gotten in far too long. You wrote to your roommate that morning telling her that you were moving out, but you promised to pay your part of the rent until she found a new roommate. She understood and was happy that you figured things out with the love of your life.

You woke up before Harry, as per usual, and walked into the kitchen to start making breakfast. When Harry woke up, he was worried because you were no longer in bed beside him. He got up and walked into the kitchen to see you over by the stove. He smiled and found himself behind you, his arms on your waist.

“Good morning love,” he said, sleep still heavy in his face. You smirked and kept cooking.

“You know, I would cook for you, but-” he started.

“But, you would burn down the place, and quite frankly, I don’t have any faith in your cooking abilities. Plus, I promised you breakfast every morning while we are together. I don’t like to break my promises.” You felt his smile grow in your neck.

The rest of the day consisted of Harry being glued to your hip. He missed you so much, and he didn’t want to spend any time away from you. After you had moved all of your things back into your home, you collapsed onto the couch from exhaustion. Harry sat next to you and wrapped his arms around your body.

“Can I ask you a question?” You smiled at him.

“You just did, but go ahead,” you joked.

“The books in the closet. Why do we have so many of them?”

“Oh those? Well, I wanted to have something to give to our future children. Something I could share just between us. I know it’s kinda dumb, but I’d like to think that our kids would like to have that bond. Maybe even make it into a family tradition that they bring to their kids.” You said this with a slight blush forming.

“I think it’s brilliant. Remind me that we need to get some more.”

“Why is that?”

“Well, our children should have some from both of us, don’t you think?” You laughed and nuzzled closer into his body.

“I love you so much Y/N and don’t ever let me forget it.” He placed a kiss on the top of your head, and tightened his hold on your body. He would never let you go again.

#harry potter x reader #harry potter imagines #Harry Potter imagine #harry james potter #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy imagine #ron weasley #hermione granger

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