#I’d say never again
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“This is the final hour, the silence hovers where dark and light devour”
#it’s taken me longer to write this damn battle than it took for my boyfriend to propose to me when I was a teenager#I’d say never again#but it would be a lie#I am a glutton for punishment#chapter 30#miss celestia 13#moodboard#for later#I am not a woman I’m a god
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the most difficult thing about growing as a person socially, as in getting out of your shell and noticing that you are, is that there will still be times when it doesn’t feel like you’ve grown at all! times when you can’t really connect with anyone around you, times when you fail to enter into an existing conversation, times when you say the wrong thing (or nothing at all when in hindsight you probably should’ve). but that’s also kind of the best thing, because that’s the thing that helps you realize that sometimes, it’s not you or your lack of skills or any shortcoming. sometimes certain environments just aren’t for you and certain people aren’t your people, and that’s okay. that’s human. it’s okay to not feel the progress you have made all the time.
#and that goes for every type of growth#backstory of this post:#after I came back after a few months of doing my international internship I felt so much more confident#it was easier making friends and walking up to people#i took more chances#and generally just heard it a lot from those around me who kept telling me how much i’d changed#this was further supported by my first office job that went pretty well#but then came my grad internship. and while i love the work and have met some great people I noticed it was difficult again#there was one office lunch where no one spoke to me at all! it was my first week and I didn’t know what to say#if i should even say anything#we were all sitting at the same table#not one person even glanced my way#it made me doubt myself; i was doing so well before#was that even real? why can’t I just speak up? this is not the way to connect with people#especially in my first week!#but you know what#i was still doing well. i just had to factor in the fact that these were all middle aged people talking about reality shows i didn’t watch#and bikes i knew nothing about#as well as people who knew i was the new intern yet didn’t speak to me at all even though I’d introduced myself to them all individually#and even so#people I couldn’t really talk to about MY interests outside of work either#my point being:#it’s okay to not feel a connection with everyone you meet#it’s okay to fall back into old habits even though you’ve developed new ones#it will never unravel the process you’ve made and the connections you’ve built#you’re doing fine#after this internship I will surround myself with people who reaffirm that belief#growth in the self#self love#positivity
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the sandra lynn / fig conversation is driving me Insane. fig saying that sometimes she doesn’t wanna exist as herself at all…not wanting to ask her friends how they see her (because she’s afraid to hear their response) saying that to someone she is a monster and she Cannot stop thinking about it. sandra lynn starting the conversation saying she needs to step up but is also simultaneously taken aback about what fig expresses and doesn’t know how to responds to it and suggests getting ice cream. sandra lynn saying “convincing people they deserve good things is really tough” talking about herself but how it also reflects fig. insane!!
#if that conversation had kept going I would have started bawling!!#fully believe brennan was like ‘well oh shit this is getting dark and heavy quick let’s uh get some snow cones’#I will say I think Emily does a beautiful job here of showing teenage life#not a universal experience perhaps but definitely a common one#feeling so lost and insecure in who you are and under so much pressure to be a certain way#and her saying she doesn’t wanna exist#vs me resonating with ‘I don’t wanna die sometimes I wish I’d never been born at all’ lyrics#it was hard to watch ngl but it’s also bc Emily does Such a good job w emotional scenes!!#that woman is so emotionally invested you get emotional invested as well#if Emily axford cries I cry with her#and loved to see more of Sandra Lynn again <3#damn good scene#dimension 20#fantasy high#fantasy high spoilers#fantasy high junior year#fig faeth#sandra lynn faeth#emily axford#brennan lee mulligan
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I just watched the new crow. And guess what??? I fucking liked it. No spoilers here but it was NOTHING like the original. Not one bit was taken from the original and replicated. It was a completely different story. And guess what? I still love the original to pieces. I still love Brandon as Eric. But also guess what? I enjoyed how Bill made it his own. It didn’t feel like a copy. It felt like a different version, with a different story. And that’s okay. The original is still awesome and super iconic. But news flash, the new one isn’t shit just bc it’s called The Crow 2024. Maybe give reboots a chance before shitting on it. The original came out in 1990. That’s 34 fucking years ago. That’s a whole generation right there. Y’all act like reboots and remakes haven’t existed since the beginning of the film industry. Some are bad and a cash grab, and some are actually kinda cool and have its own thing going. I think this one has its own tone just like the original had its very distinct aesthetic and tone.
Yes I liked it. So what. If I didn’t I would say so. I went into it expecting nothing, if anything I expected to be trash and nonsensical, but no. Everything made sense, it had a pretty cohesive story and gave a different and darker (like metaphorically not literal, nothing can be darker than the original) telling of the story and Eric’s character. And that’s okay. Let’s just learn to watch and enjoy some movies without blindly hating on them just because it’s cool to.
#I’m never gonna stop yapping about this#give this movie a chance at least#if you watched it and hated it fine#that’s acceptable#but don’t say it’s trash before even bothering to give it a try bc you think it’s a remake#it’s not#it’s literally a reboot#like the only thing that’s the same is their fucking names#and the omly 2 characters who are the same are Eric and Shelley#lit nobody else#so stop calling it a remake#I enjoyed it and I’d watch it again#sorry for the rant#movie rant#the crow#the crow 2024#eric draven#bill skarsgard
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what if when duck said he “always knew he deserved to be dead” he also (maybe unknowingly) meant he excepts how their world works. like we all know he loves living in that hell hole of a home and love love loves when things go orderly and as planned. and he’s ALWAYS fucking dying so he’s sorta like . “hey. if this world wants to kill me sometimes that’s okay.” duck will just randomly out of nowhere says things like he knows too much about whats going on, but he just doesn’t care bc he believes it’s normal. and if he has any awareness of this thing specifically , i don’t think he minds as long as he gets to come back. because that’s always what happens and he’s okay with that. maybe he just thinks that that place knows what’s best for him, so he deserves what he gets. even if it means making him hurt from time to time
#maybe i’m just saying BULLSHIT and i might delete later but. idk. just thought i’d say.#tell me what you think of this maybeee..#i randomly pulled this outta my ass so if it’s inaccurate to him i apologize to the more knowledgeable duck lovers#i do know it’s just a joke and it’s just making fun of him not knowing wtf he’s talking about . thinking death is some kind of award#but i think too hard sometimes#yeah. actually idk about what i wrote.#ANYWAY UMMM#another things that’s definitely not tru but what if in dhmis 5 duck actually expected to die but things were going wrong and it scared him#like oh nooo what if i never see this yellow dude again and that other tall one i can’t remember :(((#anyway you guys are wayyyyy better at analysis than me. but i almost never do it so bear with me while im learning#dhmis#☎️#don’t hug me i’m scared#duck#duck guy#duck dhmis#TRYING TO PUSH THE POST BUTTON IM SCARED
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Okay but for all we know Saw and his buddies picked Tech up (alive) on Eriadu.
#tech lives#okay actually for real despite the fact that I don’t think that necessarily happened#I would love to see Tech and Saw interact#because despite everything Saw hasn’t quite got to the “let it all burn’ stage#and like let’s say they met up later but before Tech has made it home and before anyone knows he’s alive#I can imagine Saw actually feeling kinda bad once he found out what happened#especially if there was some CX-ing involved#especially once it gets into ‘I need to find them I have a sister’#Saw: Oh no a sister that thing I’m sensitive about#Tech: She may still think I’m dead. She was watching#Saw: Oh nnnooo#Tech: She is thirteen years old#Saw: STOP I said I’d help you already#Saw’s Buddies: *shaking their heads*#Saw: Listen how was I supposed to know they brought their little sister on a mission like that#beeeccaaauuse yeah he didn’t know Omega was there he never saw her#I don’t think he even knew what happened#anyway I like Saw and I hope he and Tech meet up again because I think they’d both clash and get along in some interesting ways#(also like Tarkin is right there)
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oh i’ve had it with him. i don’t even know what to say anymore….can i jump him. pls. just once. one chance 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
crazy insane thoughts about him racing through my head rn. help me😊🙏🏼🙏🏼 and why does he feel the need to stick his tongue out all the time put that back in your damn mouth choi seungcheol. (affectionate btw)
him and this song bruv 😫😵😫😵‼��‼️‼️ i’m so weak for him this is embarrassing
#hani rambles!#begging rn and i never beg wtf#i wanna eat him so badddd#whatttt who said thattttt#i mean i wanna fight him so bad#when i fucking catch you seungcheol#if me and him fought i would win fr (he’d throw me across the room with zero effort)#(and i’d like that)#what who said that again#he could tell me anything and i’d do it#can’t say no to a man (choi seungcheol) with pretty smiles and beautiful eyes#whatever you say gorgeous scoups#i’m so down bad this is embarrassing#scoups#choi seungcheol#seventeen#my coupsie poopsie
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We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda
#fairly oddparents#not that anyone has portrayed him different#certainly not distance he loves Timmy he probably says it the most in the show and in fanon#but still- watching New Wish there felt like there was a disconnect with Cosmos character-like he wasn’t as well defined as he was in OG#that’s in part due to them toning him down from being an idiot plain and simple but I feel like it wasn’t fitted with something else it was#simply taken away#just to say he didn’t have as much of a presence to me in New Wish as Wanda did and I crave spinning Cosmo around in my brain#I want to see Poof being his Dad’s Boy yknow and I want to see cosmo doting and I want to see when he gets like. parental rage for the sake#of his kids#yknow? Yknow? part of him feeling detached in a new wish has translated into him not wanting to get as close to Hazel as he did Timmy-#to try and play it more like godparents are supposed to- just a presence for a couple months#but also because like. he got SO attached to Timmy and he’ll never regret it and he’d never do anything different#but idk. if it were me I wouldn’t have the capacity to go through losing my godkid again after becoming that attached#that’s not even mentioning that they don’t HAVE to be in hazel’s life the same way they were in Timmy’s because Timmy was going through#neglect and Hazel has loving family and friends all around her at all times- her blocks are mental#in that way cosmo and Wanda just have to do the Typical Godparent Job of aiding her- not becoming people she desperately needs in life#which also bleeds into why I think Peri was having such a. difficult time#godparents aren’t supposed to be attached the way his family was to Timmy and that how he learned it#but his first godkid is Not Easy and lends immediately to the issues Timmy was having where he HAS parents he HAS things (though . Timmy#was not rich and would sometimes not be fed… dev’s dad also forgets to feed him but dev is still able to eat you know)#and how he grew up with his parents as godparents and how he’s been taught are conflicting and it’s nature vs doing a good job quoteunquote#I didn’t mean to ramble so damn much in the tags I’m really sorry#told myself if I had more to say I’d write it down and post it later but I must be heard.
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Mekies: “On one hand, we have Daniel who brings race winning experience to the team and OUTSTANDING technical capabilities and sensitivities for what the car is doing. You have the incredible energy that he brings to the whole team and it helps all of us to deliver 101%”
Daniel: “I feel good. I feel like it’s early days of my career again. I have that enthusiasm and that real love for the sport again. I just feel like a better version of myself.
#whoever decided to put these two clips of their interviews together know I suffer from mental illness#juxtaposing Daniel’s TP praising him with Daniel saying he’s found that real love for the sport again??#having experienced the ‘i don’t know how I’m continuing to continue’ of COTA 2022#i honestly never thought I’d get to see this Daniel ever#speaking further about feeling like the better version of himself is too much right now#Laurent mekies I don’t care what the tifosi say about you you’ve earned my respect already#now you just need to earn my love by not messing up 😊#daniel ricciardo
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it’s kinda funny to me how that dumb scene in kiwami 1 of majima getting shot and left for dead in the harbor was basically just added as a half-assed way to explain majima not being around for a bit of the plot, but they accidentally(?) just made it seem like start of a chain reaction where majima ended up feeling slighted and heartbroken after being abandoned like that and then lashed out about it via smashing a big truck into the building kiryu was in. and yeah that isn’t inherently a romantic thing as-is but then they go and add the part where majima grabs a hostess and performatively hits on her as in-kiryu’s-face as possible, she says she’s already in love with someone, and majima lets her go immediately, no questions asked, making a big fucking point of it just to say see THAT kiryu? I appreciate when people are HONEST about their FEELINGS. people who won’t just BACKSTAB someone who CARES about them to save themselves. is that so crazy kiryu?? huh??? anyway make it up to me get down here and fight me right fucking now
#I think on another level he was sorta saying like ‘hey kiryu. you’re making it extremely clear that you don’t trust me and my intentions#and I’ve been trying to show you- over and over again- that I’d do just about anything for you and your safety#but I can’t just let my mask fall off in front of everyone- I need to keep up the unpredictable morally grey wildcard act for both my sake#AND yours. because disguising my helping you as crazy random violent outbursts and weird stalker behavior#is the only way I CAN help you. do you think it would go over well with shimano or literally anyone else if I was outright helping you out#of the kindness of my heart and fondness for you? stop being so fucking dense and look past the crazy wacky nonsense for a second and#maybe you’ll realize that all I do at the end of the day- really- is help you and put my own life and reputation on the line for you.#I am an honest guy when it comes to my real values and when I told you I wouldn’t let anyone kill you unelss it was myself- I meant it.#I’ve taken a knife and a bullet for you now. can you REALLY not see through the act yet? am I REALLY that unpredictable when you think about#it?’#that was a longer explanation than i intended but. it was difficult to put into words#I basically feel like it could be read as him implying kiryu shouldn’t backstab the people who put themselves on the line to help him#and/or pointing out that he’s never actually done kiryu dirty and has stuck to his word protecting him in the ways he can#trying to say yeah all this is a crazy act and all but when it comes down to it you Can trust me#it really makes sense when you think about it that he’d have to help kiryu/show affection towards kiryu in unpredictable convoluted ways#at that point in time because. I mean. there’s a reason he was the only person who showed up to welcome kiryu when he got out of prison#and that’s because A) he sticks to his word and his loyalty to people he cares about and B) no one else had the balls or the batshit insane#mask to wear to ward off anyone asking real questions like majima did. because ANYONE associating themselves with the supposed#patriarch-killer was a HUGE NO-NO at the time. someone important showing up for kiryu and welcoming him back outright could’ve caused#all-out warfare probably. except majima. because majima was dedicated and smart enough to use his widely-feared wildcard persona#(that everyone tended to view as incapable of having any Real agenda to worry about) to his And kiryu’s advantage#does that make sense??? I feel like it makes a lot of sense if you get it to click in your head#kazumaji#majima#kiryu#yakuza#kiwami 1#yk1#rambling
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setbacks do not mean you have lost all of your progress. it is part of the healing process to go through ups and downs. as hard as it is, it will never be straight sailing—but the wonderful thing is that’s why we have other people to walk through it all with. it is okay (preferred, even) to lean on someone you trust when you are hurting or when you feel like you’ve failed yourself.
healing does not mean you will never experience that hurt again. healing means learning to cope and strengthen yourself for the hurt you know will come. healing means finding the courage to endure it. healing means asking for help when you need it and learning to even know when you need that help. healing does not mean just surviving—it means learning to live, too.
you haven’t failed. you are growing. it is okay to start again with the knowledge that you’ve acquired in your setbacks, so that each time you do start again, you make it further and further until eventually, those setbacks are so few and far in between that they are no longer your default state.
your hurting won’t always be your default state.
#cathy says words#comfort#i never thought i’d have a fullblown panic attack again#but i did today#and thats okay. i did my best to cope and accommodate myself through it#and i made it through and i am okay#setbacks happen and thats inevitable#you must learn to take care of yourself and be kind to yourself instead of being angry with yourself when they happen#it is okay
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Okay so full cast proseka who's the least popular character? Who's the most popular? My guess would be mafuyu or like ena or any of the nightcord girlies(boys?) Cause they're already the most popular female unit by a landslide, and everyone loves to mafuyu-ify tsukasa
Like fan popularity wise? This is probably a better question for someone else tbh bc I’d have no idea beyond guessing & my anecdotal evidence is gonna be super skewed by the wxs bias + eng fanbase bias. Iirc colopale has also avoided answering this question.
If I had to guess: Tsukasa is probably the most popular character. Rui+emu+maybe nene+toya+akito+niigo are up there as well.
Least popular is probably a mmj or Leo/need member. Minori & Ichika are probably saved by being leaders & saki by being tsukasa’s sister.
#I’d probably say honami for least popular I’ve never seen a honami oshi in my life but again. wxs bias.#shizuku/shiho/airi/haruka are also possibilities.#asks
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told my dumbass sister to get off the ground and stop licking that felon’s fucking boots tonight and also called her a fucking idiot and she just let me bc she was too stunned bc i never get angry and my grandma asked me to change the subject. happy election night baby.
#misc.#i’d say it again too unprovoked#like babe i raised your goddamn kids and you never graduated high school shut your stupid fucking mouth !
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I miss Mei so much you don’t understand :( bring her back AidaIro. Also Yako and Hakubo
I hate how the school mysteries (other than Hanako, Mitsuba and Akane) get there one arc where you really get to know them and care about them and then they just go away forever. GIVE THEM BACK PLS AIDAIRO LET THEM OUT OF THE CLOSET THEYVE DONE NOTHING WRONG
#tbhk#toilet bound hanako kun#jshk#jibaku shounen hanako kun#shijima mei#yako#tsuchigomori#Tbhk no.6#like I feel like they add so much#there all so fun#I’d say Sumire to but like you know.. rip#they could be silly little side characters to do silly little things#like I feel like we got that in the beginning with Yako and Tsuchi they would appear in little side arcs with one or two lines to help out#Yako can teleport anywhere and Mei can bring anything to life she draws??#why aren’t those powers used more??#at least Kako and Mirai get two arcs… and get mentioned by Akane every once in a while#how are you gonna write Mei so well and then she’s just gonna never been seen again#she’s like big foot at this point#it’s not that I don’t love the main cast but I love them too and I feel like there so underused#I feel like the whole 7 mysteries thing is kinda underused#apparently there proxies for god?? how the heck does that work?? like I understand mystery but I also understand 117 chapters and I info#they have a meeting like once and that was really cool do that again#or twice if you count the one where Hanako just rolled up to Tsuchi and was like ima break your shit#I chose to believe Hanako invited the rest of them to that meeting but they all chose to not show up#on that note in what way is Hanako the leader? he’s not the oldest#he’s not the strongest..#(you know cause Teru solos him ez and Hakubo solos Teru ez)#no one even listens to him so like???#anyway bring my girl Mei back she deserves it
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I feel like no matter what that the handling of Solavellan in Veilguard is going to let most people down.
#this isn’t a spoiler and I have no canon evidence to support this#I’m just saying it will never ever live up to expectations#I’d love LOVE it if Lavellan gets her final moment in the sun so to speak#but it’s gonna be Hawke in Inquisition all over again I can feel it#solas and rook are integral to the story and lavellan is not#she’s an aspect of solas past and his characterization but that’s only true if that’s your canon world state#and I TRULY cannot imagine that much time will be devoted to what is ultimately a fraction of players#I welcome the chance to be proven wrong tho amirite#solavellan#dragon age veilguard
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Psalm 73:26, Psalm 46:10
hey uh i’ve been extremely unwell recently, was at the hospital for 12 hours last wednesday. um i’m genuinely worried about about my body being able to withstand the what is dubbed the “escalation of my symptoms”. so i just want to thank everyone for making this tumblr experience the best yet. thank you for treating me like a person and for your encouraging words.
for all the bodies in the pit for the knees on the floor and in bush that sides rural highways for all those in the lake those frozen by winter or frozen by freezer for those whom cling to the rock the ones burnt and those who never stopped screaming
i love you and it was never your fault. god loves you and it is the free will of man, our greed that has allowed for great evils to brand our backs and infect our lungs. you are meant to be here in this moment so please live. i hope life unfurls like a rose for you. it takes time. don’t let your anxiety or shyness bar you from opportunities. find the divine in simple pleasures.
#evidence of life#i know this is quite glib but don’t know what’s next and if my physical body can make it there#sucks the purpose of this blog my project sea legs never got to be in its live / active phase#anyways again this is not goodbye this is i genuinely don’t know if i’m waking up tomorrow this isn’t 2 scare anyone this is 2 say thank you#what’s a chill way to say that i didn’t go into detail about my illnesses n kinda fading fast like it’s not even ~me it’s my body giving out#this isn’t a suicide letter or my final words or something silly like that it’s that medically and physically idk what’s next#if you pray i’d appreciate prayer or if you’re spiritual in any way or keep people in your thoughts in a special way pls do so for me#it’s the end of our holiday but it isn’t goodbye !!#mwah#yeah i really don’t know how to write this without it sounding like fluttershy i think i’m gonna die soon sorryyyyy
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