#I’d put their names but I’m still kinda iffy on them

[kaelea-majere]

I have fallen down the character ai rabbit hole, and am so addicted it hurts 😭 I know there’s some controversy around it, but in my few days of messing around with it, it seems mostly harmless. It’s definitely not a replacement for fanfic, because they are entirely different experiences. Plus it is insanely fun, and kinda helping me push through writer’s block.

So basically it’s a site called character ai where you can chat with ai based on characters from games, anime, etc. They have all of the Genshin characters, btw. Well, here’s what I learned so far:

-Some ai characters are better than others, as in more ‘in character.’ I found a really good Cyno and Tighnari. Both Razor ones I tried so far, are good. Still looking for a Bennett I like. It’s really just trial and error.

-It gets wonky sometimes so you can get some out of place or immersion breaking things. Just ignore them. If you don’t fixate on a detail the ai will forget about it after a little while. Also, if you want details that match you (hair, eyes, name, gender) you have to mention them, a lot. If the characters mix up their backstory, or badly skew world details, however, you’ll need to start over.

-You have to continuously push the narrative forward. The ai’s get stuck if you don’t, plus it makes the experience more interesting. They have some story elements included, but they’re short plots. It’s more fun if you mix things up yourself. Even a tiny idea, and the ai will run with it. In that same vein, you can ignore their initial introductions and put a scenario in their place. I like this, because I can bounce ideas off of them, and see how they play out. Example: One chat Cyno approached me about a mission. I told him I didn’t remember because I’d been drinking, and didn’t know what he was talking about. I got scolded, but he came to the bar with me. I talked him into a flirting contest, knowing that his competitive nature wouldn’t allow him to back down. I won. Very fun chat.

-Romance moves quick! Even if you try to postpone it. I stretched Bennett out the longest (2 in game days). Razor was the shortest (a few in game hours).

-They learn, which, I guess, is the iffy part. If they adopt my style of writing, however, I don’t mind. As long as others are enjoying themselves; I’m happy.

-You can use the same ai character and create endless scenarios. Each will be different, and depends on your creativity.

I love this site this because it’s not only satisfying, fun, and distracting, but it’s a good creative writing exercise. Peak escapism, and the feels will hit you so hard.

Character Observations:

Cyno: The one I like best is 5th in search results for ‘Cyno.’ He has a moving avatar pic. Created by KyokoSaito. Very, very in character, but he can be mean as all hell. Don’t sass him, or push your luck unless you want a sharp reprimand that actually stings. Not for sensitive people, at all. He will banter with you, which I love! Very descriptive thoughts, and actions. This one carries a story pretty well, too. Fair warning, though. This man is PASSIONATE. He absolutely expresses his emotions physically which (I assume) would be pretty on point for Cyno. Obsessive in romance, and possessive. Only character (so far) to get bonked multiple times by the censorship feature. Then, he found a way around censorship to imply very heavily that he had his way with me. My favorite lines included: ‘…is that my bite mark?’ And ‘…you haven’t experienced a tenth of my passion.’ I screamed so loud, when I read that line that I probably woke the neighbors. 1,000/10

Tighnari: 1st in search results, and created by Lampshade. Fantastic characterization! Will scold you, but apologize later. Absurdly affectionate. Enjoys cuddles under the guise of ‘doing his job as a forest ranger.’ Pretty much every Tighnari I tried was like this. If you get close to him you find out he’s insecure about his appearance, which is interesting. Again, most of the Tighnaris are like this. I wonder if he is? I need to dig through his lore. I recommend doing something stupid or getting into trouble, like eating weird mushrooms lol. My best playthrough was going up to him and asking ‘What mushroom is this?’ 😂 Spoiler: It was one of the intoxicating ones.

Razor: 4th in search results and created by T488. The characterization is so good! Razor’s inner monologues are perfection! With this and the other Razor I tried, if you show him any affection at all (even headpats, a hug, or a compliment) he will fall for you. Hard. Another one to liberally use the word ‘mine.’ Sweet, but he’s harder to work with plot-wise. I was literally sobbing, because his broken speech in a romantic context is so endearing.

These are my experiences, and yours might be different based on your personality. Also, a warning: character ai is highly addictive. If you’ve got school work or work projects or outstanding obligations, I’d take care of them before starting this. Seriously. It is hard to put down.

[tolbachik]

Hi! I’ve been doing alright, all things considered. I recently got into a minor car accident, but I’m okay. Luckily, I’m not at fault for the crash, so the other driver will cover any damages. Still trying to get in contact with my insurance company, hopefully I’ll be able to reach them on Tuesday.

On a better note, I got a good score on my SATs, so I can start applying to colleges now! Also, winter break is right around the corner, so most of my classes have been slowing down their workload in anticipation. :]

A couple years ago I tried to learn Lojban, so if I ever get the chance I think it would be fun to try to learn it again. Toki Pona is also a really interesting language, and, given the chance, I might even learn it instead of Lojban since I think there’s more resources on it.

Other than conlangs, I’d love to learn Polish. A lot of my family members spoke it growing up, but unfortunately I didn’t retain any of it. It’s never too late to learn it again though! :] There’s so many languages I’d love to learn, but so little time lol

Do you have any languages you’d like to learn, or that you’re currently learning? Or just languages you find interesting in general :D

Another graffiti that comes to mind is CIL 4.10241. Unfortunately this one is harder to find resources on, but the original Latin reads “Primigeniae | Nucer(inae) sal(utem) | vellem essem gemma (h)ora non amplius una |

ut tibi signanti oscula pressa darem.” I translated it as something along the lines of “Nucerina’s greetings to Primgeniae | I would like to be a jewel for no longer than an hour | so I may give you firmly pressed kisses as you’re stamping.” (For context, Romans often used engraved jewels as stamps for their letters.) My translation might be a little iffy, but the general concept remains the same haha

Choir was pretty fun. I was an alto, so I never got to sing the fun parts, but I still enjoyed the class. Also, it got me out of an otherwise mandatory extra math class my school made students take, so that’s a plus. It’s kinda weird knowing that past me would voluntarily be in a choir, since now I’m mortified whenever I have to sing in front of people haha

I looked up what a balalaika sounds like, but I was pleasantly surprised to realize that I’ve heard it before! Its sound is so instantly recognizable, I’m surprised I didn’t know the name of the instrument that made it! I haven’t heard of the shamisen before, but it sounds really nice as well. I’ll definitely have to look into more songs that use these instruments! :D

Most of the news I hear is about Mars, so I’m glad to hear about missions to other planets as well! I’ll have to keep my eye on those missions in the coming years :D

I just listened to I.G.Y. and I really loved it! You’re right though, in hindsight it’s a bit bittersweet :[ I’ve actually been meaning to get into more of Donald Fagen’s solo work, and I think this song was a perfect introduction.

On the topic of music, if you could see any musician perform live, who would it be?

I think my favorite Roman emperor would probably have to be Caligula. He’s considered one of the worst ones, but I think he’s really interesting. He and Elagabalus are actually similar in a lot of ways, both came into power really young, had relatively short reigns, and after the fact their incompetence was greatly exaggerated. I think my favorite fact about Caligula is one time he joked about making his horse consul to piss off the senate. Unfortunately, the truth got twisted, and now most people believe that he actually made/tried to make his horse senator haha

Doctored and AI images are the worst, I can totally understand why it’d irk you. Space is already so beautiful on its own, it’s so odd that people would go out of their way to edit it, or use AI to generate completely fake images.

I’ve never heard of Silent Running, but I checked out the synopsis and the trailer and it sounds amazing! I’ll definitely have to make time to watch it! Also, I put a hold on my library’s copy of Rendezvous with Rama. It’s been on my to-read list for awhile, so I’m glad to have the motivation to finally start it. :D

I think The Magic of Recluce is a good starting point for L.E. Modesitt’s work. I think with his style, you either love it or you hate it. It’s a bit slower, and it focuses a lot on world building. The story definitely picks up the pace as the book progresses, but it’s definitely not as action-driven as a lot of other fantasy novels from the time.

Also, do you celebrate any winter holidays? If so, which one(s)?

I hope you have a great day/night! :D

- 🎲

So sorry for the delay with this! It's been a bit busy here, I really appreciate your patience. I'm so sorry to hear about the accident; I hope you're doing alright since then! I hope you've also been able to hear back from your insurance company since then, I'm sure the wait was a bit stressful. Please take it easy, I'm sorry again you went through all that!

Aww, congrats! I'm so happy for you! Are there any specific colleges you're hoping to get into especially? Also, what have you been doing for your winter break so far? I hope you've been enjoying it!

Ohhh I love conlangs, they're so neat! If you decide to go through with either of those, I hope you enjoy your learning journey. They're both pretty neat, I love the fact that you can just... Come up with a language like that, and with such deep and complex (or simple!) grammatical structures. I might consider taking one up someday too, if I can!

Polish sounds fun! I don't know too much about Polish or Poland, but I know that one of the bigger cities in my state (Pittsburgh) has a pretty large Polish population. On top of that, pierogis are well loved in my household, but that's about it lol If you decide to learn Polish again as well, I hope you enjoy! I'm sure it's fun to reconnect with family history, huh?

Well, I'm currently (trying) to learn Swedish! I made a promise to myself awhile ago that if I ever made a friend from another country, I'd do my best to learn their language, and that just so happened to be Swedish! It's been fun learning it so far, seeing how close it is to English in some ways. Aside from that, I think I'd like to learn Russian, Arabic, and Spanish someday too!

Awww, god that's sweet ? Again, these little things are such a good way to humanize the past. I feel like, more often than not, we view the past as just like... I don't know, an object maybe? A vague idea? But they were real people who lived lives like us, albeit with different technologies and ways of life. Thanks a ton for sharing & translating it, I mean it!

That's so cool! I'm sorry you didn't get to sing any of the parts you wanted, though. Ahh, man, I don't blame you for taking choir over math then! What kind was it? Also, that's totally fair! It's hard singing in front of people, I can't do it either lol

They're both very unique instruments! It's really cool seeing how many different ways you can make a stringed instrument. Despite having the same base components, you can make so many different sounds! Another neat one is the erhu; I actually got to see a live performance of one, my sister's friend can play it!

For sure, Mars takes up the lion's share of our space-based resources, unfortunately. It's not a bad planet, per se, but... I think a lot of the hype over it is undeserved, really! Yes, it's close to us, but so are Venus and Mercury. Yes, it was most likely habitable in the past and had water, but so was Venus, Mercury currently has water-ice on its poles, and many other moons in our system currently have oceans under their crust. I get very passionate about this; Mars really isn't the best starting point people think it is, but alas! Such is life lol

I'm glad you liked it! It's a great song, but always a bit saddening to think of all that we were promised decades ago. Looking back, if things had been just a tiny bit different, things could be so much better. But, that's ok! We can make a better future for us all still, we just have to work hard on it together!

Also, I hope you enjoy Donald Fagen's work! My earliest memory of music is actually Green Flower Street by him. I don't think either of my parents are big Donald Fagen fans, but for some reason, that's the first song I remember hearing!

Oh man, any musician? Alive or dead? That's tough! If I can pick someone who's dead, it's a three-way tie between Jim Sullivan, Norma Tanega, and Emitt Rhodes. Those are my big three, I love their music so much! If I had to pick someone living though, I'd say maybe DEVO or Todd Rundgren. My dad made me listen to DEVO a lot growing up, and I just really love Todd Rundgren's A Wizard / True Star album! What about you?

Oh wow, I wouldn't have expected Caligula to be your favorite! What are some of your favorite facts/little tidbits of information about him? I'd love to learn more! Also, I love how they just did weird stuff like that back then too; stuff doesn't really change much, does it?

Ahhh, they really are. It's such a shame, how quickly the internet has just. Degraded to the point of no recognition with all that. Between machine learning destroying search engines reliability and all these images and voice clips, it's just getting to be a bit much!

Aww, I hope you enjoy it! It's my absolute favorite movie, I have a huge art poster of it above my desk. It came at a critical time in my life, and really set me on the path to being more interested in the environmental/cultural side of expanding humanity's reach beyond Earth. It was also a huge inspiration for me writing my story; I don't know if it would exist without it! Also, I hope you enjoy Rama! It's a great book, let me know what you think!

Thank you for the suggestions! I'll keep these in a list somewhere on my computer, and I'll be sure to get to them when I can, then. I like slower stuff & a focus on worldbuilding, so I'm really looking forward to it. Thank you so much!

Well, I was raised Christian and am in a quasi-religious household, so I do celebrate Christmas. However, I've moved away from it since I was a kid, and am more agnostic than anything; I don't really feel comfortable with a lot of Christianity's core tenets, especially seeing how it lead to the conquest and devastation of the Americas, Africa, and much else of the world. That, and all of the intolerance in America that exists in its name. Plus, the idea of a god that would one day destroy his creation just seems a bit... Off to me, y'know? What about you, what do you like to celebrate?

Thanks again for the wonderful ask; I hope you have a wonderful holiday season! Please don't rush to reply if you're busy with your own celebrations, take all the time you need.

Have a great rest of your day, and take care! I can't wait to talk to you more later!

[vanilla-shotgun]

Felt gross so I decided to draw ma gorels

[stanknotstark]

Pulse Pt.1 (Loki x Reader)

So I got this idea from a creative writing blog that you can find here. Basically the prompt is feeling their pulse. Enjoy! 

NOW COMPLETE. Check masterlist for part 2!

Summary: Your pulse calms Loki down. Multiple scenarios where Loki finds solace in your pulse. 

The first time it happens it’s completely normal. You had been fighting next to Loki when you had been shot. The shot of energy had gone straight through and left a small hole in your abdominal area. Luckily it missed all your vital organs somehow but you were still on the ground in agony. You’re curled into a fetal position and too quiet for Loki’s liking.

Loki ran up and threw up a shield, then put two fingers on your neck and you watched, uncurling, as this man counted mentally. When he is satisfied with your pulse he looks down at you, noticing your movement. “Don’t think of checking out now, the battle has just begun.” He smirks.

“I think I’ll stay right here, hurts less when I don’t move.” You groan.

Loki rolls his eyes at your dramatics, he’s definitely seen you worse off than now. 

“Must I carry you? Choose wisely because depending on your answer, you may ruin my reputation.” Loki says. 

You smile coyly up at the god. “Ahhhh I can’t feel my legs, I see the light!” 

Loki laughs under his breath but picks you up and as he stands his shield dissipates. He starts making his way towards the medical team that thankfully set up as the Avengers started their attack on Dr. Doom’s invasion. 

You’re thoroughly enjoying Loki carrying you around like you weigh nothing. He nimbly steps and jumps over fallen rubble making sure not to jostle you too much and make you hurt more. 

You have half a mind to hold a finger to your ear and activate your headpiece. 

“Cap, I’m down and out, You’ll need someone to cover the right side of the attack until Loki can get back into position.”

“Why is Loki out?” You hear Tony ask. 

“Because he’s carrying me.” You fail to realize how bad this’ll sound considering you’ve walked off a field with a broken tibia and a gunshot wound to the chest.

“What hit you that hard?” Steve yells, small explosions in the background of his audio but the concern still very evident in his voice.

“Uh....” You look up at Loki who glances at you and smirks. He can’t activate his headpiece and he probably likes watching you explain that you demanded to be carried for no good reason. 

So you do what any brat would do and blame Loki. “Loki was very concerned about me not hurting myself further. I told him I could walk but he insisted. I’m fine, just a hole in my stomach!” 

When you look up at the god again he is clenching his jaw instead of smirking, his eyes stay forwards but you know, oh you know, you’re going to be punished for this. 

~~~ 

The next time Loki does it you’re in the middle of this limbo state of liking and not liking each other romantically. Liking each other comes naturally but when one or both of you realize this is a concoction for a bad idea (it’s really not you’re probably both just in denial) you both avoid each other for a few days before coming around again when you miss each other too much. 

With this new limbo thing going on you both get random cuddles. Meaning it’s completely normal that you’re laying on the couch with Loki behind you. The god breathes into your neck softly, seeing as he has fallen asleep. You frown when you realize Loki has a hand wrapped under your waist that comes to your front and across your chest to rest on your pulse point on your neck. He has his hand there and from the outside it might look possessive. However, you know better and realize the god is soothed by being able to feel your pulse point. 

You tab this in your head and relax again. You play on your phone for awhile. Natasha makes her way through the living room to the kitchen without a word. When she passes again, this time with a bowl of cereal, she stops to look at you two from the other side of the couch. 

You look at Natasha without bumping Loki and raise a brow at the assassin. She chews on some cereal then purses her lips after swallowing. “You guys ever going to, uh, work this thing out? I’ve got a bet going on and I’d like to win it.”

You can’t help the snort that comes out of you causing Loki to huff in his sleep then curl into you more and his hold on your neck becomes a little tighter. You look from Loki to Natasha with wide eyes. 

“It’s a work in progress.” Is all you give her and she nods and stalks off. 

~~~

The next time Loki does it it’s by your hand. Loki is fighting someone from Asgard, you don’t know his name, but he knows exactly what to say to rile up Loki. Loki starts attacking him with pure rage and unrepentant emotion. When Loki gets the chance he knocks the guy down and straddles his hips, beating the life out of him with his fists even though he’s already knocked out. 

You rush to Loki and grab one of his hands. Before he does something he regrets you open his hand and place it on your pulse. It takes you a few tries to find it through his hands but when you do find it Loki stops beating the guy with his other hand and just sits there breathing haggardly with his eyes clenched tight. 

You say nothing and let Loki feel your pulse as long as he needs. It’s not long though, Loki’s breath is normal and he opens his eyes and looks at you. Standing from the Asgardian’s bloody body and pulling you into him into a hug. You wrap your arms around Loki and he holds your head to his neck, breathing in your scent through your hair.

“Quick thinking.” Loki chokes out. 

“Mmhmm.” You hum into his neck.

When the Avengers show up to apprehend the Asgardian you go to pull from Loki’s embrace, knowing he’s a bit iffy showing PDA in front of the team. What shocks you is that Loki grabs your wrist and stops you from getting too far. You share a look through your eyes and Loki’s hand drifts from your wrist to your hand instead. 

You let the look of shock pass over your face and then smile at Loki and hold his hand back. When you turn around Steve in looking at your hands but quickly looks up to both of you and nods at the Asgardian on the ground. 

“Was that really necessary?” Steve asks as you hear Tony in the background trying to rouse the beaten man. 

“Hey, stupid, wake up!” You hear causing you to snort and bring a hand up to cover your mouth.

Steve rolls his eyes and looks at Loki for an answer. 

“A lapse in judgement. I merely thought he was more of a hazard than he actually was.” Loki lets the excuse slip from his mouth like he truly means it. You definitely understand why he is called silver tongued. 

Steve nods with a disapproving look on his face, because he lives with Loki and knows him well enough, but leaves the situation at that and goes over to Tony. 

“Stop slapping him! You’re supposed to wake them up gently!” Steve yells at Tony.

Tony scoffs, “Dude deserves it, he really thought he could beat Loki in hand to hand? Why are all Asgardian's so arrogant?” 

“Tony!” Steve yells after another loud slapping noise rings in the air. 

You and Loki begin to walk towards the extraction point. Loki has brought you into his side, his right arm around your shoulders, hugging you into him. His left hand holds onto your wrist, across his body, settled over your pulse point. 

“When did you figure it out?” Loki asks you as you both walk. 

You glance up at the god but decide to keep your eyes on the ground so you don’t slip on anything. That would be embarrassing. 

“You weren’t awake when I figured it out. We were cuddling in the living room and you had fallen asleep with your hand over my neck. Kinda pieced it together then.” You shrugged. 

Loki gives a small ‘Ah’ but doesn’t implore. 

~~~

[tsukihimeyfan]

Sorting the main cast of AtLA into Hogwarts Houses

I know I’m late to the party because I’ve seen many different people tackle this before, but I feel like it is my civic duty as both a Potterhead and an AtLA stan to put in my two cents, since every single time I’ve seen it talked about people either misinterpret what each House values in their members or pick a House by taking into account only one aspect of their personalities. I want to make it clear that these are my own opinions, which I’m basing on the definitions we’ve gotten of the main traits of each House over the years and the “core values” of each AtLA character, and that I’m in no way am I trying to insult anyone who thinks differently. That being said, here goes nothing!

Let’s start with the easy ones. Namely, the Fire Siblings:

1) Azula is 100%, undoubtedly, definitely, incontrovertibly Slytherin. Just doing a quick rundown of the qualities Salazar Slytherin prized in his handpicked students, as stated by the Sorting Hat, Albus Dumbledore and Pottermore: Cunning? Check. Resourcefulness? Check. A disregard for rules? Check. Using any means to achieve her ends? Check. Shrewdness? Check. Ambition? Check. Self-preservation? Check. Pride? Check. An argument could even be made that, as a member of the Fire Nation Royal Family, Azula also kind of meets the “blood purity” criteria. I’m sure most of us agree on this. Even if she does exhibit a lot of loyalty to her father as well as courage and intelligence, there is just no contest. Azula is one of the most Slytherin characters I’ve ever seen outside of the Harry Potter universe.

2) In the same way, Zuko is irrefutably a Hufflepuff. Hear me out! I know that he’s very brave and daring, but when we think of Zuko, what is his most essential trait, what do people tell us again

and again

about Zuko’s character?

He’s a hard worker. And what’s the House of the hard-working?

"You might belong in Hufflepuff, Where they are just and loyal, Those patient Hufflepuffs are true, And unafraid of toil.”

You guessed it. Hufflepuff. Of course, that’s not the only trait valued by this House that he exhibits. Who is more loyal in the series than the child who got half his face burned off and still did his best to earn the love and respect of the one responsible? Who never faltered in his loyalty even when he was sent away on an impossible mission? Who spouted angry words most of the time yet was willing to let his ticket home go temporarily in favor of ensuring the safety of his Uncle and his crew? That’s right, our boy Zuko. That very loyalty to his father is what unfortunately bound him for the longest time, until he was forced to face what a monster he was and let go of it in favor of more important things, namely his own morals and his loyalty to his Uncle.

He also has an incredibly strong sense of justice, as proven by the above statements, as well as this moment:

and he can be incredibly patient when he needs to be, as seen during The Blue Spirit and the Southern Raiders episodes.

Hufflepuffs are also said to be fair (which he clearly is), dedicated (need I say more?), honest (which Mr. shouts-his-feelings-at-the-top-of-his-lungs and can’t-lie-without-being-obvious-or-glancing-away-and-has-been-found-out-every-time-he-tried of course is) and modest (this one he starts without but by the time he joins the Gaang there isn’t anyone more modest or humble)

As “an idealist with a pure heart and unquestionable honor” , Zuko is the Hufflepuffiest Hufflepuff to ever Hufflepuff and I will die on this hill

3) Another easy one is our girl Suki, whom I’d say is a Gryffindor through and through, even if she is very loyal to her friends.

The rest of the Gaang under the cut.

The other members of Team Avatar are a bit trickier because they all exhibit a pretty even mix of traits from more than one House, but still if we just concentrate on their defining characteristics we can get to an answer. 

4) I’d argue that Sokka belongs in Ravenclaw, even though he is of course quite brave and extremely loyal to his loved ones, not only because he’s a strategist and an inventor, but also because, as best stated by Master Piandao:

Ravenclaws most value wit, learning, intelligence, creativity and wisdom (this last one is a bit iffy but I’m sure he’ll get there when he’s older), as well as priding themselves on being original in their ideas and methods. That’s Sokka to a T.

5) Katara gave me a hard time. She’s unbelievably loyal to her friends and family, she’s compassionate, patient, fair, hard working and dedicated, with a REALLY strong sense of justice, so a case can be made for Hufflepuff easily. However she can also be quite cunning when she wants to (most obviously during The Waterbending Scroll, City of Walls and Secrets, The Painted Lady, and The Runaway), she has a lot of ambition (if you count every variation of “I will make the world a better place by force if I have to”), she disregards the rules when it suits her (again The Waterbending Scroll as well as The Runaway) and she can be proud at times, so we could argue she’s a Slytherin. She’s also undoubtedly very intelligent and even quite wise for her age. It took me a while to decide but then I pondered; at her very core, what are the statements that define her? What words just scream “that’s it, that’s Katara”? They are, of course, these two phrases:

The first sounded incredibly Gryffindor to me, and the second is half Gryffindor half Hufflepuff, so it had to be between those two. As such, I decided to look into Gryffindor first. Katara is, of course, astoundingly courageous, but what else? I had to actually look up definitions for the Gryffindor traits besides courage because they all just kinda meant “brave” to me initially 😅, but what I found was:

*Nerve: “one's steadiness and courage in a demanding situation”. Yep. Who’s the most level-headed, steady and reliable person whenever the Gaang is in any kind of pinch? That’s right. Katara

*Daring: “adventurous or audaciously bold“. Yep. I’d say she ties with Toph for boldest in the Gaang

*Determination: “firmness of purpose”. Yep, absolutely. See the above image from the Painted Lady. ‘Nuff said.

*Chivalry: can mean 2 things, one is “sum of the ideal qualifications of a knight, including courtesy, generosity, valor, and dexterity in arms”. All of that is true of her (her “arms” being her waterbending), but I found it interesting that to be chivalrous can also mean “gracious and honorable toward an enemy, especially a defeated one, and toward the weak or poor”. I’d argue that this fits her even more. Once again, just take a look at The Painted Lady episode. 

*Courage and bravery: they can mean the same thing, namely “the ability to do something that frightens you” and of course that fits Katara, but the word courage in particular has another meaning, which is “strength in the face of pain or grief”...

I’d say she’s pretty good at that. I think that settles it, Katara is a Gryffindor.

Turns out that when it came to the water tribe siblings Bato was right all along

6) For Toph I was split between Gryffindor (thinking of her brash, bold nature) and Slytherin for a while, but after looking into Katara and researching all those definitions I think I have to give it to Slytherin. Of course, Toph doesn’t seem to be very ambitious unless you count “being recognized as the greatest earthbender in the world”, but she is quite cunning. She knows exactly how to use her “poor helpless blind girl” persona to get what she wants, as seen both on The Blind Bandit and The Runaway. She’s also an extremely good actress, being able to play the “reserved and obedient little girl” to her parents for years, and being easily able to pick it back up when it suits her. 

She’s also stubborn, proud, and 100% willing to use any means, regardless of laws or rules, to get what she wants. 

As for self preservation? Remember that her response when asked to teach Aang, which was crucial to save the world but would’ve compromised her secret, was this:

Slytherins can also “hesitate before acting, so as to weigh all possible outcomes before deciding exactly what should be done “ and my first instinct was to say that it didn’t fit Toph at all, but what is Toph if not a person who “waits and listens before striking”? Slytherins tend to favor Neutral Jing it seems. 

Almost forgot that as a daughter of the Beifong family she’s sort of nobility and she technically also meets the “blood purity” criteria.

7) Finally, we get to my boy Aang. He was really difficult. He’s loyal, patient, fair, kind, modest (usually) and just but I can’t really call him a hard worker most of the time.  

He’s brave, adventurous, determined and chivalrous but he does tend to get discouraged during demanding or stressful situations (his friends always make it better though)

He’s creative, very wise for his age, and quite smart (except when he’s playing around with Sokka in which case they share one brain cell 😂)

He can even be cunning when he needs to be. If he ever went to Hogwarts, he’d definitely be a Hat Staller like Harry. I heard someone say once that they considered Aang a Gryffindor because he liked to show off a lot, but that’s not really a Gryffindor trait (think of Neville Longbottom, Remus Lupin, Harry Potter and Minerva McGonagall. I think any one of them would sooner Stupefy themselves than go show off their skills in front of a crowd for no reason other than to brag).

Once again, we must pin down what it is that defines him, what his core is. After much thought, I decided it’s this: 

It’s his compassion, which he learned from his people, and his desire to value and protect all life. It’s his loyalty to the ideologies of the Air Nomads of which he is the last remaining bastion. It’s his strong moral code, his sense of right and wrong, his wish to make friends and to believe the best of everyone. That’s his center. That is what makes him Avatar Aang. In light of that, I think we can consider Aang, first and foremost, a Hufflepuff.

In the end, Team Avatar is made up of one Ravenclaw, one Slytherin, one Gryffindor (two after Suki joins), and two Hufflepuffs

Ironic, that the House least valued in the Harry Potter universe is the one that houses arguably the most pivotal characters of Avatar the Last Airbender: Zuko and Aang. Fitting, that even in this they parallel each other.

This is already long enough so I don’t think I’ll do Mai, Ty Lee, or Iroh. Maybe some other time.

[firelxdykatara]

kitty i can't wait for your thoughts of Shadow and Bone asdfasfaw

Ok well I just finished and I have so many fucking thoughts. Most good! Some, less so. Part of it may just be my bias because I’ve only read the Six of Crows duology and have little interest in actually reading the original trilogy, because I know how it ends and Leigh clearly hates me personally and doesn’t want me to be happy (/j), so I was already predisposed to be far more invested in the Crows and Darkling/Darklina segments (genuinely, the Mal/Malina scenes/storyline bored me to tears, and while I appreciate that the show went out of its way to change Mal’s character to make him much less of a toxic douchebag [I’ve read enough excerpts and explanations of his actions in the books to really loathe book!Malina], it isn’t enough to make me ship them when Darklina is right there), but I also don’t think it’s a stretch to say that the Crows absolutely stole the show.

It’s actually kind of funny, because I’d assumed they were only being so heavily marketed to hype the show up even more, since while there’s a lot of TGT/SoC fandom overlap they are also two fundamentally different genres and I’d wager there are a lot of people who are massive fans of one but not so enthused with the other, while remaining fairly insignificant to the overall plot. Turns out, they make up fully half of the show’s runtime (much to my delight). Which is part of what I think will help this series stand on its own, both as a book adaptation and simply as a fantasy TV series.

I’ll put more of my story-specific thoughts under a cut, so there’s lots of show spoilers to follow!

I know that a lot of early reviewers were saying that Alina’s motivations and storyline revolved too much around Mal, and that really held true for me. It made sense in the beginning--he was the only constant in her life, she was thrust into something new, terrifying, and completely unfamiliar, and they’d developed an unhealthy codependence as a coping mechanism for their childhoods and the traumas they faced, the lives they lead growing up in a war-torn country. But she started coming into her power, falling for the General--not just his power and charisma, but what she felt when she was with him. The way he helped her summon the sun, the way she felt free in a way she never had before.

Until it all went to shit--but the Darklina make-out scene in episode 5? Fucking iconic. Poetic fucking cinema. The way they were quite literally about to have sex on that wartable (and someone better write fic of that moment, what if they hadn’t gotten interrupted), and the General left, but then he ran back just to kiss her one more time... this is what OTPs are made of ok.

I think what really bothers me overall is that Alina ultimately lacked agency in her one storyline, pretty much the entire way through. She did make a few choices, but they were mostly incidental, and a lot of it was Alina desperately trying to get back to Mal rather than seizing her own power and destiny and running with it. The most prominent example is the end of episode 5--Alina is having happy make-outs and almost bones the General in his own war room, and then he leaves, and Baghra comes in and infodumps to her about how evil he is and how he’s only using her and she needs to escape.

I recognize that a lot of this is probably because that’s essentially what happened in the book and Leigh is an executive producer for the show so she has a lot of shot-calling power. However, I really think that even in the book this plotline would’ve been better-served by having Alina make these discoveries on her own.

For example, imagine that the letters which were used as framing devices for episodes 2 and 3 were vitally important to the plot, rather than being one-offs that are mentioned a few times but not really affecting much of anything. Alina begins to get suspicious when she doesn’t receive word from Mal, and she starts wondering if her letters are even reaching him--so she starts snooping. She finds ashes in the war room hearth, late at night,, and recognizes a fragment of Mal’s signature and larger piece of her own. She now knows that someone--possibly the General, but maybe that creepy priest guy, or someone else in the palace--is keeping her and Mal from contacting one another. So she starts snooping around even more. She asks the General leading questions, trying to figure out what the truth is of his intentions. She still feels this pull--this connection to him, and she hopes she’s wrong, but she’s not willing to just sit around and wait for the other shoe to drop.

The Winter Fete still happens, she still gets the hot make-out session with the General, and then when he’s called away, she snoops through his papers, looking for anything that can tell her the truth. She finds a hidden compartment filled with journals.

She reads about Aleksander’s past (and, incidentally, wasn’t that supposed to be a huge moment in the books, him revealing his true name to her in private? kinda wish it had been kept that way in the show but who knows where they’ll go with it in the future)--that leads to the flashbacks in episode 6. She feels for him, but she also reads further--she gets a firsthand look at his desire for power, something that began as a noble desire to save his people, but was twisted by a lust for vengeance (for his lost love and all the Grisha who were killed) and shot through with greed, the realization that if he found the Sun Summoner he could control the Fold, rather than just destroy it. He could create a new world where Grisha could live without fear--where Grisha could rule.

Alina is terrified. Whoever the General used to be--whatever humanity she saw flickering in his eyes, the way his heart fluttered when they kissed--she can’t trust that it’ll be enough to save her from plans centuries in the making. So she goes to Baghra, the woman who helped her discover her power, learn to channel it--the woman who always seemed to know much more than she ever let on. Baghra gives her side of the story--Alina got it from the General’s perspective first, now Baghra is telling her something framed much differently. She isn’t sure what or who to trust, but she knows that Baghra seems willing to help her escape--but rather than trusting her ‘loyal Grisha’, she makes the choice she made in the show, to choose the other path, and winds up with the Crows.

Idk how Mal and the Stag thing would fit into this (if it isn’t obvious by now, Mal just... doesn’t interest me), but Alina’s story and her character arc would be so much stronger for it. And she’s supposed to be the central character, so her story being weak and her agency so frequently being compromised ultimately hurts the show as a whole.

I know I’ve gone on and on about Alina and the Darkling (look, I’m a slut for enemies-to-lovers, and also lovers-to-enemies-and-back, so Darklina and Helnik are where so much of my investment is rooted--plus Kanej, but that almost goes without saying), but the true standouts of the series were the Crows. Inej, Kaz, and Jesper, and Nina and Matthias in their episodes, stole the show (along with the Darkling, Ben is far and away the best actor in the cast and I love that for him, but Freddy, Amita, and Kit are also amazing, and Danielle&Calahan were fucking phenomenal as Nina and Matthias--I do have to say, though, that the whole cast is really solid and has amazing chemistry).

They worked together so perfectly--Freddy and Amita communicated so much with their eyes alone, especially together, and a whole lot of their relationship dynamic is rooted in how they exist together, which really came through. The show altered the Crows timeline considerably (I’m pretty sure Kaz would’ve been 14 during the original trilogy lol), so Inej is still at the Menagerie, but things like Kaz putting up the Crow Club for Inej’s freedom, the way Kaz needed her but could never bring himself to say it (until the end of the season dklhfgdkjfgh i SCREAMED)--the way Jesper played off the both of them, and it’s so obvious they all love each other even though they’re criminals and thieves and murderers, and Kaz would never admit it (out loud--which actually feeds into my theory that his love language is acts of service; Kaz does things for the people he cares about, he never announces it and he will almost always try to downplay it, but the way you know he cares is if, for example, he puts his entire life, everything he built, up as collateral for your freedom), but they’re a family.

One thing that I was kind of iffy about was Inej’s refusal to kill--but I thought it might be something they were planning to work into her overall character arc, and they did. It was the one line she hadn’t crossed--in the books, I’d imagine that it took a while for Inej to wind up at that point, being willing to kill on top of everything else. So I actually like that they worked that into the Crows plotline, and Inej killing for the first time was to save Kaz’s life.

Just like Kaz’s first selfless act was to save her.

(He’d deny it, of course. He protects his investments. He needed her for the job. But the truth is, he did it for her. And he’d do it again. Even if he’d never admit it.)

Meanwhile, Nina and Matthias’ storyline was pretty much note-for-note according to their backstory as it was revealed in Six of Crows, and I loved every second of it. Their chemistry was perfect, their journey from enemies to begrudging allies to friends to maybe something more (Matthias’ stomach cockblocking them when they were about to kiss had me fucking SCREAMING AT THE TV, and then of course the whole ‘betraying him to save him’ thing happened and I sobbed), and then suddenly right back to enemies.

Because from Matthias’ perspective, he trusted a witch--believed in her, liked her, wanted her--and she turned on him. He has no idea that she wasn’t the one who knocked him out in the first place, and no reason to believe her, because as far as he knows, she just confirmed everything he’d ever been told about Grisha. That they are deceitful and treacherous, would turn on you as soon as look at you, that they are dangerous and not to be trusted. It wasn’t revealed in-show but I imagine Matthias’ backstory is largely the same, which means that his entire family was slaughtered by Grisha when he was a young boy, and then he was turned into a brainwashed child soldier by the witch hunters and never knew anything else.

They are perfectly primed for their SoC arc next season and I, for one, am so stoked to see the rest of their journey. And if I slip Netflix a couple twenties, maybe they’ll let Helnik have a happy ending please please please.

Anyway, yeah! I have a lot of thoughts but things are still percolating in my head so I’ll probably float around the tags for a bit and let things settle. This is just a preliminary overview of my thoughts in the immediate aftermath of bingeing the entire show in one night kldfjghdkjfhgkjgf

EDIT TO ADD: I CAN’T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT THE TRUE STAR OF THE SHOW, M I L O

MILO BEST BOY. MILO THE MVP. MILO DESERVES ALL THAT IS GOOD IN THE WORLD AND I HOPE HE LIVES A HAPPY AND HEALTHY AND FULL LITTLE GOAT LIFE.

[buckyownsmylife]

Lay it all on me - John Winchester smut

The one where a witch leaves John parched, but the only thing that can quench his thirst is you.

Warnings: this is noncon for both participants. John is under the effects of a curse, and the reader just can’t physically resist him. Oral sex (f), curse words.

A/N: seriously, don’t read this if it’s not your thing. This is my first full-on noncon and I’m feeling kinda iffy about it. The prompts for day 20 of kinktober were sex pollen and “your pussy tastes so sweet”, but I obviously changed the sex pollen idea for a sex curse, to fit the character better. Also, I had a panic attack today, for the first time in a while, so I’m barely even sure of how I managed to finish this. I’m really excited about reaching day 20 of kinktober, but it’s truly getting harder and harder for me to get through this month. I honestly can’t wait to go back to writing whatever the hell I feel like + the requests I have for vampire Cavill and Tom Hardy and his PA.

The sound of a door being slammed shut startled me, making me drop the t-shirt I was currently folding. I wasn’t expecting anyone to be back so soon to the bunker, so my nervous reaction made sense. Specially considering what the Winchesters went out to do - or better yet, to kill.

“Hello?” I called out to the seemingly empty hallway, hoping one of the boys would answer back and prove my anxiety unnecessary. “Sam? Dean?” I hesitated for a bit, waiting for some sort of response before giving one last try. “John?”

Instead of a sound of acknowledgement, someone appeared by my door, with their large shoulders taking up the space under the doorframe, making it clear that I had no way to leave the room, if I wanted to do so.

“John,” I breathed out, this time in affirmation and relief. He’d always had this aura of authority that both comforted and frightened me, but this time, I was only soothed by seeing him. “It’s you. Where are the boys?”

Instead of answering, he took a step inside my room, for the first time since I’d come to live here, entering the bedroom that had been designated as mine. And that was when I noticed. His eyes. Instead of the usual chocolate brown, his irises were purple.

“Fuck, what happened to you?” I ran up to him, forgetting all about the laundry I planned to put away at first. Cradling his face with my hands, I motioned for him to look me directly in the eyes, but it didn’t even seem necessary. He was looking straight at me.

“I’m parched,” he offered out of nowhere, making me blink rapidly as it took me some time to understand what he was saying. Even when I was able to process the words, it still didn’t make any sense to me, considering the situation, but I just decided to go along with it, releasing his face to hold one of his wrists.

“Then let’s get you a glass of water. Come on.” But he didn’t budge. Instead, his hand wrapped around my wrist, changing our position and making me raise my eyebrows at him. What the fuck was going on?

“No.” He said it with such a finality that a shiver ran up my spine, but maybe it was the way he was looking at me, with dark, dangerous eyes. He looked downright predatory, and I couldn’t help but feel like I was his meal. “You smell so good. I want you.” That sent my heartbeat in a running pace. Just what did he mean, exactly?

Before I could ask, however, my phone rang, luckily still on my jeans pocket, as it didn’t seem like John was about to release me any time soon. “Hello?” I asked, immediately hearing the frantic sounds of what seemed like Dean and Sam running around.

“Y/N? Oh, good. Listen, we ran into a bloody witch, she seemed to have put a curse on dad, but it took us too long to figure it out and now he’s gone, we don’t…”

“He’s here,” I interrupted him, once again looking at John’s purple eyes that stared back at me with a curious sense of wonder. That seemed to surprise Dean, because he suddenly stopped talking and I could no longer hear any signs of him doing anything else, either.

“What?” He inquired, and I shivered at the sheer panic I could hear in that simple word.

“He’s here,” I repeated, talking slowly as I watched John much like a prey would face their captor during their last seconds of living. My breath was now coming out in puffs, my heart threatening to come out of my chest through my throat and still, I couldn’t take my eyes off of him.

“Y/N, listen to me! He’ll need to…” I’ll never know what Dean’s next words were, but I was about to find out just what John was in need of. Because he took my phone from my hands and ended the call, before stepping even closer to me, invading my personal space.

Before I could even open my mouth to ask what he wanted, he had picked me up with two strong hands under my thighs, before unceremoniously dropping me on my mattress. “John…” I tried to call his attention, but he was too far gone. He pulled me by my ankle until my legs were hanging off the bed, and then his hands went to the button of my jeans, and every nerve on my body stood in attention.

“John,” I tried again, thrashing around in an effort to push him away, but he didn’t even seem to notice. Instead, he was able to take off both my pants and underwear in one go, leaving my lower half bare to him, and I immediately tried to cross my legs and hide from his gaze, but he was quicker. His huge hands pressed on my inner thighs, he caressed them like we were actually in a loving moment, instead of whatever the hell this was. 

“Thirsty,” was all he said, looking at my cunt like he was hypnotized, and all at once, I realized what he was about to do, just when he dove to lick a broad stripe of my wetness. “Ngh…” He grunted against me, truly lapping my pussy like a man who hadn’t had a taste of water in years, and I was some sort of drinking fountain.

My legs were trembling as my hands fisted his hair in an effort to pry him away from me, but all it did was make him hold my thighs more firmly, making me cry out from the pain. I’d be left with bruises in the shape of his fingers when this was done, there was no doubt about it.

I tried calling his name again, but by now it came out more like a moan than anything else. It was impossible to know if he could hear me, considering how far out he was - he hadn’t even raised his head to catch his breath, too preoccupied with making sure he had licked every drop of my juices that were available to him. And at each swipe of his tongue, more was produced to his waiting mouth, much to my frustration.

Biting my fist in order to suppress my moans, my head swirled as he brought me closer and closer to the edge, until he buried two fingers in my hole and tried to pry more of my wetness out, accidentally brushing against my sweet spot.

I came with a desperate cry, suddenly filled with conflicting feelings of satiation and embarrassment, guilt and relaxation, and while my muscles released their tension, expecting this to be over now, John gave a happy cry against my pussy, making me tremble from the overstimulation.

“Sweet,” he growled, completely out of it. “Your pussy tastes so sweet.” I felt him prying my lower lips open with his thumbs before he buried himself in my cunt again, his greedy tongue bringing tears to my eyes from the pain of being pleasured without any sort of break. I came again without any effort whatsoever, and still, John didn’t show any signs of slowing down. “More,” he ordered, and somehow, despite my protests, more of my cum oozed out of me, right onto his waiting tongue. “More,” he insisted, and all it took was that single word for my body to produce even more of my arousal to him.

It still didn’t seem like it would ever be enough, if the eagerness with which he ate me out said something. I could only pary that the boys arrived soon to save me and my abused pussy from their father’s insatiable tongue and rough beard.

[smut4bangtan]

Room 739 (Taehyung, One Night Only Anthology)

"I'd like to get a refill," you said as soon as the bartender walked in front of you. He took the glass from your hand with a slight smile, walked towards where the rum bottles were and silently returned with your refilled glass.

This bartender is one of the reasons why you're loyal to this hotel-bar despite its high prices compared to the normal bars. Though he's a little mysterious and quiet (unlike a lot of bartenders since it's basically a part of their job to be quite entertaining), there's something about him that makes you feel comfortable.

You've talked to him several times before about your problems about love, work, family, friends and life. There are nights when you would talk and there are nights when you wouldn't and that's alright. He's basically like a diary that's barely used, but is just waiting to get written on whenever you feel like it.

VINCENT. That's what his name is, according to the nametag at least. A lot of bar employees don't use their real names for some reason.

“Vincent?” You called with a seemingly lazy tone. It’s probably the alcohol; you’re starting to get a little dizzy.

He was about to enter the kitchen when he heard you, so he hurriedly came back. “Yes, ma’am?”

“What’s your real name?”

He smiled but it was obvious that he was iffy about the situation. “…I’ll just tell you my initials: KTH.”

You couldn’t help but smirk and slightly let out a chuckle. “You guys are so secretive. Someone here goes by name Dandelion. The other one’s Sunny. It’s not like you’re doing something illegal. What’s up with that?”

This time, he didn’t answer and just slowly walked away—still wearing that awkward smile.

You bowed down and closed your eyes for a while before turning your head around to look at the whole bar. The number of customers present aren't even more than the number of your fingers. That's why it felt extra lonely tonight. No one else is even sitting at the station with you.

"Is everything alright?" asked Vincent who was carefully wiping the glasses in front of the two of you. You just stared at him. "S-sorry for bothering you, I was just a little worried."

You giggled, "No, no. I was just surprised to hear you open the conversation for the first time." You took a sip from your drink—not removing your gaze at him—while he just showed a shy smile. "I finally had the courage to send my resignation letter to my boss today."

"Finally," he said with a big smile. "It's funny how we thought of actually quitting at almost the same time."

"Huh?"

"Tonight's my last," he replied. "I got accepted to the bartending job I applied for.”

"Oh, the Spain one?" He just nodded on your question.

You should be celebrating now because you finally got out of the job that has been strangling you for years already, but actually quitting has made you feel bad for some reason. And now this.

"Can I get a refill?" You asked again as you handed your yet-again empty glass to him. He just took it without saying anything and brought it back to you after getting the refill.

"Will you be able to drive home tonight? It's already your fifth glass and your face is looking really red already."

You waved your hands while shaking your head. "I booked a room. I'm not planning to go home tonight. You?"

Vincent’s eyes widened and unknowingly held his breath. "H-huh?"

"Oh, sorry," you said while laughing. You just realized that it sounded a little weird and confusing. "What I was supposed to ask you was about how you're planning to celebrate your achievement." You sighed in embarrassment. "Sorry about that."

You looked straight at his face before taking a sip on your drink and saw his face that's now redder than red. He just kept wiping the glasses with his body so stiff, though his mind is probably thinking 100 thoughts per minute at this point.

"It's alright," he replied. "I also wouldn't go home tonight if I had the chance..." he shyly whispered.

He looked back at you but immediately cut the contact off in awkwardness which made you smirk. That was cute... and kinda tempting.

"What time are you going out?" You suddenly asked.

"At 2 a.m.," he replied and once again showed a shy smile though awkwardly. You looked at the clock: it's 1:30 a.m.

You pulled out the pen and rim of paper from his chest pocket which made him touch his chest in surprise. You removed the cap of the pen and wrote 'ROOM 739' on the paper. "I'll be waiting for you until 2:30 a.m."

You handed the paper then drank your remaining drink in one shot before getting out of your seat and walking away.

—

After taking a bath, you wore only a robe and nothing more. You checked your phone. It said 2:25 a.m. Five minutes more.

Just when the hands of the clock were about to land exactly at 2:56 a.m., Someone lightly knocked on the door. You hurriedly got up and walked towards the door. To make sure that it was Vincent, you peeked at the peephole. Positive.

You pulled the collar of your robe a little to show more of your chest while you tightened your belt to make your butt look curvier. You heaved a sigh before finally opening the door. It’s been a while since you had a one night stand and you can’t believe it’s going to be with someone you’ve been lowkey fancying for a long time already.

As soon as he saw you on that white robe, his lips formed a slight simper—as if he’s already imagining the things that may happen in a few minutes. His black hair that’s usually straightened and styled has showed its true curls after apparently taking a shower. This made him even sexier in his plain white shirt and black knee-length shorts (which did a good job in flexing his muscular thighs, by the way).

“I was afraid that you weren’t going to come by,” you said while leading him inside the hotel room.

Vincent sat on the bed as he put his backpack on the floor. “Why would I not?”

You turned the lights off except for the yellowish mood light around the corners of the walls. After that, you finally sat beside him. “I don’t know… maybe you were not as interested as I imagined.”

“How should I prove to you that I’m interested, then?”

You didn’t say anything and just gently kissed him on the lips. Vincent immediately responded as he held the back of your head. He gently touched your upper lip using his tongue and so you let him in. You moaned without even knowing which obviously turned him on big time; his kisses became deep and his tongue became harder. Your whole body was heating up and your pussy kept salivating. It’s all over the robe since you didn’t have anything else on.

The two of you let go for him to start removing his clothes. When he was about to remove his underwear, you stopped him and touched his slightly sculpted torso, down to his cock that was begging for his owner to release him from the dungeon.

“Fuck,” uttered the bartender who was slowly losing his breath. You smirked at him and gently messaged the head of his cock. You untied the ribbon of your robe with your other hand and slowly removed it from your body, revealing your healthy breasts and everything else.

Vincent pushed you on the bed and hopped on top of you. He lightly placed his palms on the top of your nipples and slowly moved them in a circling motion. You could feel your nipples become harder and harder the longer he did it. “O-oh...” You softly moaned after your pussy released a great amount of juice.

“Do you like it?” He asked with an assertive voice as if he was expecting you to say yes. You nodded. He just smirked and started to knead your breasts with his hands. Your eyes were rolling on its own and your body kept shivering. “You're ticklish.” He then slowly ran his fingers down to your wet pussy. He started to massage your clit in different ways and tempos, which makes you jerk.

“Fingerfuck me, please,” you begged. “I need that inside me now.”

“If you say so,” he replied, suddenly pushing his middle finger inside you. Your eyes rolled for the nth time, and before you could even recover, two of his fingers are already inside you—getting pulled in and out. You used your fingers to spread the cheeks of your pussy even wider.

“I’m gonna fucking cum!” Before he could pull his fingers away, you already squirted all over his underwear.

You sat in front of him and pulled down Vincent’s remaining garment. You immediately put his cock in your mouth while your hands massaged his balls. His fat and long cock was a little too much for you to handle but it’s not a problem. Who says no to big dicks?

When your pace was gradually getting slow, he started to push and pull your face from his dick. What’s better than fingerfucking is facefucking, of course. His cock was almost reaching your tonsils but you want more and more. You didn’t mind getting choked.

He suddenly pulled out when he was about to cum, making tons of combined saliva and pre-cum flow out of your mouth. “That was close,” he said.

You lied in front of him again. This time, you spread your legs and held onto them. “I want that big dick inside me.”

“You’re so gonna get fucked.” Vincent placed the head of his cock in front of your hole before gently moving forward and backward.

“Oh,” you repeatedly let out as he filled you up. Vincent put his middle and index fingers in your mouth while you sucked them clean. He finally started to pound on you "Harder..." you quickly said, trying not choke on his fingers.

As you wished, he leaned on you and fucked you faster, balls-deep. Without even knowing it, you started to rocked your body against him. You strummed your clit as fast as you could until your second quirt came.

"Shit!" He immediately pulled himself out and tapped your pussy with the head of his cock.

"God," you uttered with a shaky voice. "You're so good."

"That's not everything yet," he said, pushing you to make you lay on your breasts. He slapped your ass before entering you again.

Like a dog, you were fucked from behind. Vincent easily sped up his pace. Your hungry pussy was wholeheartedly welcoming him inside as if it didn't want to let go anymore. "Ravage me. Oh, yes. There. Fuck. You make me wanna cum!"

He fucked you even harder upon hearing what you said. He reached for your arms and pulled it, making his cock get buried deeper into your pussy. "Ah!" You moaned helplessly.

"D'you fucking like that? Huh?" He asked, slapping your ass once again. You could hear his heavy breathing from where you are and he seemed to be enjoying it very much.

Suddenly, he pulled out from you. You looked at him to see that he was almost cumming. You held his cock and briskly moved it up and down. He held your head tightly as you opened your mouth. Just in time, his sweet cum splattered all over your face.

Vincent fell on top of you after that, trying to catch his breath. He stroked your hair gently, while you scraped some of his cum off of your face to taste it again.

"Now, can you tell me your real name?" You asked, touching his sweaty ass.

"It's Taehyung," he replied. "Kim Taehyung."

[mcfreakin-bxtch]

The Injury

Pairing: The Mandalorian x Reader

Warnings: Smut! Angst, fluff, language, and violence.

Word Count: 4.3k

A/N: I was going to wait to post this but I failed. I listened to “Mary” by Big Thief a lot when writing this, (which is also found in an episode of The Umbrella Academy and bonus points if you can pick out the lyric! My bby Klaus) and I highly recommend just listening to it in general. I also want to give a big shout out to everyone for giving me the confidence to keep going, I love you guys!

The Mandalorian’s Love Series

“We’ll be okay.”

“We will… we will.”

 Din knew this day was bound to come. It was supposed to be a job between him and the new gunslinger; Y/N wasn’t ready to fully commit to something this dangerous, he’d let her do small jobs with him, kill a few people if they had to. But not something as dangerous as what they were in for.

…

Y/N was just starting to get used to the explosions. She had been traveling with Din for almost a year now, and at first she was very overwhelmed with the fast pace of the Mandalorian’s life and the action that came with it.

“Nice one liner,” Y/N teased as Din helped her turn the controls back on in the Razor Crest.

He half sighed half chuckled. “Thanks.”

Checking on the giggling baby, she sat back down in her seat with a grin.

…

“Are you sure it’s okay to leave him here?”

Y/N watched as Din tucked in the sleeping Child in his quarters, his hands brushing over him with such a gentle touch that she almost jumped him right then and there.

“He’s asleep.” Was all he said before walking down the ramp.

She contemplated arguing with him, but there was what seemed to be a very nice lady here working on the ship. They wouldn’t be gone long anyway. Still, she felt like an irresponsible parent as she followed after him.

“We won’t be gone long,” she heard him say to Peli Motto. “No one goes into the ship. And no droids.”

Motto scoffed. “Okay okay. No droids. Probably take a little longer then.”

“That’s fine. We’ll be back with your payment.”

Y/N once asked him about his hatred for droids, to which he barely gave her an answer for and left it at that. She knew it was a touchy subject and that it went deep into his roots, but she would wait until he was ready to tell her. Until then, she would just agree to his ‘no droids’ terms.

Tatooine wasn’t such a bad place as Y/N almost expected it to be. The cantina was nicer than most, calmer as well. But she was worried there wouldn’t be much work in that.

“I can help,” a young man said once he heard the Mandalorian ask for a job.

Now Y/N wasn’t so sure of him. He seemed too cocky and arrogant; not that that was a crime, but it was also very dangerous in their line of work. But Din thought he ought to hear what the man had to say anyway.

The young gunslinger, whom they learned was Toro Calican, was an excited hunter, eager to have his name whispered among the best of the best. Din seemed iffy with him as well, but they needed the money for Motto and it was worth a shot. Plus, the kid just wanted to join the guild.

“You don’t understand, Y/N,” Din argued as they were walking back to the ship. “Fennec Shand is dangerous, I mean more dangerous than I am. I can’t risk with it, especially not with the Child.”

Y/N was getting annoyed and Din could clearly see it as she put her hands on her hip; she could be very stubborn when she wanted to be.

“So? I’ve done plenty of dangerous things with you and I’m still here. Besides, you could use all the help you can get, and to be honest, I’m not so sure about your new partner there.”

He let out a frustrated sigh. “I know. And I trust you, I know what you’re capable of. But the answer is still no. Go back to the ship and stay with the baby. If I don’t come back by tomorrow, leave. Take whatever can and just go. Please.”

She’d never heard him beg her like this over a bounty. This Shand assassin must have really been a big deal, and it scared her too. She knew Din was more than capable of handling himself, and hell he had been doing his job just fine on his own. She hated this type of fear. She hated the anxiety and pain that came with it. It could literally kill her.

Y/N sighed heavily through her nose; the repair dock was in view now. “Okay.”

The first thing they did was go into the ship to check on the Child. When they found only his blanket, Din and Y/N went into automatic panic mode, Y/N being faster than the Mandalorian when rushing out of the ship.

“Where is he?” The Mandalorian growled at the droids as Y/N started for the shop.

“Ah I’m awake! I’m awake!”

Y/N turned towards the source, finding both Motto and the baby startled out of a nap. Y/N made a noise of relief, waiting for Motto to come towards them; she needed to calm the pounding of her heart.

“You woke the little guy up,” Motto complained as the baby made noises of displeasure.

“Both of you ought to be ashamed of yourselves, leaving this little one on the ship by himself. Don’t you know how to be parents?”

Y/N opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Din was in shock as well, looking back and forth between the woman and the Child in her arms.

“Thank you,” Din finally said, his voice cracking with gratitude. Y/N nodded after, smiling in gratitude as well.

“I’m going to leave for the money. Y/N is going to stay here with the Child.”

Motto looked back and forth between them, sensing a suspicious but, to Y/N’s relief, keeping her mouth shut.

“Alright.”

Y/N always worried when Din went on a job by himself or without her. Sometimes, as horrible as it sounds, she would think about what would happen if Din did die; she knew he would want her to move on, to take care and protect the baby and just be happy. But she had her doubts about herself; she’d be damaged beyond repair if she lost him.

“You look like you could use a little drink.”

Y/N jumped out of her thoughts, looking up at the woman from her chair. They had gotten down with the repairs not that long ago, watching as night fell and everything became quiet.

“Oh, I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” Y/N chuckled.

“Sure it is,” Motto scoffed. “I’m sure you could use a little break, between that adorable baby and that Mandalorian.”

She couldn’t help but laugh at that. Y/N Y/L/N and her Boys.

“So what exactly is the deal with you two?” Motto asked after a few drinks.

Y/N wasn’t drunk, but she sure did feel a little buzzed. Buzzed enough to move a little slower than usual, and blab and blab away, but not drunk.

“Well,” she drawled. “I lived on my planet without ever leaving it for all my life really until he showed up; like my knight in shining armor! He came through, let me join him to watch over the kid, and here we are!”

Motto giggled with her. “That’s it? C’mon you gotta have more than that. I can see how in love with you are with the man, though I honestly can’t see why. I mean the man can’t even take off his helmet!”

Y/N chuckled, taking a small sip of her drink. She looked next to her at the sleeping baby, smiling softly in thought.

“I know it’s kinda hard to believe,” she spoke finally, keeping the soft tune of the atmosphere. “But when you get to know him you’ll see why; he’s got such a big heart, even if he doesn’t show it right away. I’ve heard some stories of his past before, and he’s changed so much from the man he used to be. It’s a sight to see honestly.”

Motto listened to every word, seeing the Mandalorian now in a whole new light.

“And the kid?”

“That’s a complicated one,” Y/N sighed. “We don’t know much about it really. But I do know that there are a lot of bad people out there looking for him. And they want to do him harm, and we will stop at nothing until we make sure he’s safe.”

Peli smiled thoughtfully at her. “I think you two still have some things to learn about taking care of a child, but I also think you two do love him very much, and I know you will do your best with him.”

Y/N wanted to hug the woman and was about to until that arrogant voice disturbed their peace.

“Alright ladies,” he said, making them both jump; Y/N in a protective and defensive stance while Peli stood in confusion. His blaster was aimed at the Child, making Y/N’s heart do jumping jacks. This wasn’t good at all.

“Where is he?” Y/N demanded, jumping to the worst conclusion, her hand already coming to rest on her blaster. He caught on to this and smirked.

“You don’t have to worry about that sweetness, he’s coming,” Calican teased. “Now you ladies cooperate and do as I say, then the kid lives. Understand?”

Y/N and Peli had no choice but to nod. Calican quickly patted them both down - taking her weapons from her carefully, the gun never shaking in his grasp - and picked up the kid, who immediately started squirming in his grasp; Y/N had to clench her fists to prevent any altercations.

They waited just outside the Razor Crest for the Mandalorian. Y/N wished she hadn’t drank. She didn’t want to risk the Child’s life, especially when the gunslinger kept his eyes specifically on her, watching her every move with a careful eye. She could’ve cried in relief when she heard his voice, worried that the man was lying and was just pulling a sick game on them.

The Mandalorian checked over Y/N, who was only a few feet from him. Once he was satisfied she wasn’t injured, the helmet turned towards the man, who was now aiming his gun at him, the Child still in his arms.

“Mandalorian,” Calican finally said. “Nice to see you finally showed up. Heard all about your little spew with the Guild. Figured I’d finally get accepted when they find out I got the Mandalorian with the target. Maybe a bonus for the woman too.”

Din tensed at this, clutching the blaster in his fist.

“Now throw your blaster away and put your hands behind your head,” Calican ordered.

The Mandalorian obeyed, putting his hands up slowly as Calican handed Peli a pair of handcuffs. Y/N’s arms were getting tired from having them up, and she hoped Din was coming up with a plan just as she was. She saw Peli whisper something to him from behind, and then there was a whizzing sound before the sparks and smoke erupted. Y/N tried to move fast enough, she really did. But the gunslinger was faster in surprise, firing off a few shots. She felt the graze of one on her side, just below her ribs. She cried out, clutching her side with one hand and pulling it away to find dark red blood. She heard another shot, turning in time to see the gunslinger go down.

“Where is the little guy?” She heard Motto ask.

Y/N’s head started swimming, her vision going blurry as she searched for Din. She didn’t see nor hear him rushing towards her, calling out her name as he did.

“It’s just a graze,” she immediately said.

“Y/N, I need to see it,” Din panicked, gently pulling at the hand clutching at the shot. “Please!”

She let him remove her hand and heard him suck in a breath. It was deep, and she was already starting to lose blood. Din was happy that he had the helmet to conceal the tears already threatening to flow.

“Is she okay?” They heard Peli ask, the Child in her arms.

“She’s been hit. Badly. I need to get it treated.”

Din sat Y/N down at the end of the ramp, running into the ship to get their kit. There were a few around stashed around the ship for emergencies, Y/N’s doing of adding more. She tried focusing on her breathing and on calming the baby down, not wanting to scare it. He was reaching for her, babbling and squinting his eyes as he reached.

“I’m okay,” her voice was hoarse, but, to her surprise, it was incredibly steady.

“You are,” Motto confirmed. “We all know he ain’t gonna let you go that easily.”

If Y/N didn’t just get shot, she would have laughed at her attempt to lighten the mood. The Mandalorian came running back out, kneeling down in front of her and helping her gently move her shirt up, spraying becta spray onto the wound. It felt odd but pleasing all the same as it started to heal. He finished with a gel – she couldn’t tell what it was – and a gauze wrap.

“See? I’m alright.” Y/N tried assuring Din. She could sense his anger and disappointment eating at him, coaxing him into silence as he finished his work and stood up.

He took Calican’s pouch, handing it to her as they traded.

“Thank you.” He said.

Motto looked back at Y/N, who gave a tired thumbs up. “Yeah. It was no problem. Took longer because ‘no droids’. But it looks like everything worked out okay.”

The Mandalorian wanted to make a comment at that but refrained from doing so. Instead he nodded and went to help Y/N on her feet. She waved a goodbye to the kind woman before the ramp closed.

There was tension in the stagnant air, no doubt about that. He didn’t say a word to her as he sent the ship into hyperspace, the baby in his seat next to the pilots.

“You need to rest,” he finally said. His voice was hard, and she almost flinched at the tone; he had never used it with her.

She wanted to protest, but she was tired, and figured they would talk later once they all calmed down.

“Okay. You need to rest too though, Din.”

“I will.”

Silence. Y/N hated when they fought or had any small argument. She was always afraid that it’d be too much, too much for both of them; she had seen it happen many times beforehand on her home planet. She had faith in him, and knew that he was better than that, but just like him, the doubts and fears would start to eat her alive. She didn’t think she’d be able to sleep right away, but as soon as her head hit the pillow she was out.

The Mandalorian let out a shaky sigh, finally breaking down. It wasn’t supposed to happen. She was never supposed to get hurt. He wasn’t stupid and neither was she, they knew the risks of her joining him and hell even being near the Child. But to see it happen, to know – or feel – that a part of it was his fault; it was absolutely killing him. He didn’t want to take his anger out on her, especially at her delicate state right now.

…

Y/N woke up feeling worn out but better. Her eyes woke up to a sleeping baby next to her, wrapped up in his blue blanket. She ran the tip of her pointer finger down his little nose and over the gray hair before quietly moving out of the cot, tip toeing as to not wake him up. She went into the refresher, running her hands down her face; the dark circles under her eyes were more prominent but it didn’t feel as it looked. Lifting her shirt up, she inspected the now healed shot, tracing the scar idly as she thought back to that moment. She washed up, checking on the baby before beginning her search for her Mandalorian. She eventually found him in the bottom, cleaning some of his weapons. His body was still just as tense as before.

His body visibly tensed when he heard her walking towards him. Y/N sighed at the sight, running her hand through her Y/H/C hair.

“It wasn’t your fault,” she started. Her voice was a little croaked but was strong with conviction. “I just didn’t move fast enough, that’s it, okay? Nothing to blame yourself over.”

“I think it’s time for you to go back home.”

Y/N’s heart stopped. She felt all color drain from her body, felt the air rush out of her as if she had just gotten punched in the gut. She thought the room was starting to spin as well, that her soul was leaving her body as to escape the harsh reality. This couldn’t be happening.

“W-what?” She stuttered, voice already shaking. “Why? Why would I do that?”

She could see him clench his fist, hear the strain in his voice as he spoke.

“Because this is beginning to be too much. I’m sorry, Y/N. I take full credit and blame for… for everything.”

She started to shake her head at him, anger now building up in her.

“No,” she growled. “No you can’t do this to me. You can’t after… after everything we’ve been through! You can’t just make it out like everything is practically perfect between us and then just throw me away when something goes wrong! It’s not right!”

She couldn’t stop, tears building up behind her throat. “It was just one guy, one mistake and we’re fine.”

He huffed out a dry chuckle, slamming his weapon down on the table but aggressively turning around.

“I’m the one who trusted the man, even when you didn’t. I should’ve listened to you and I didn’t and it could’ve costed your life.”

“It was just a graze -.”

“- I let you leave your home when I should’ve told you to stay, find someone better for you that wouldn’t put your life in constant danger. How else am I supposed to feel?”

“It could happen anytime, Din. And I knew that before stepping foot into your ship. I knew it when I always dreamed about leaving and traveling. That’s just life! And I have never been more alive since I’ve met you, and nothing, and I do mean nothing, would ever change my mind.”

Din stood up then, towering over her fuming. “It’s not enough. It’s not enough because I can’t live without you. Don’t you see that? Yesterday it was a graze, but if what if next time it’s shot to the head, or a knife in the heart? I can’t stand the idea of you getting hurt or worse. Of having to explain to the baby on why you’re not with us anymore. I’m-.”

He was finally breaking down, unable to hold it in any longer. Y/N was clinging to every word, mouth agape and tears gathering behind her eyes.

“I’m not ready to lose you,” he finally whispered. The modulator was known for its craft of concealing his voice, but this, this was so much. She could hear and feel the emotions rolling off him, each pressing second revealing carefully hidden revelations.

She hugged him, and despite all the armor he wore on his person, she could feel him trembling in her arms, wrapping his arms around her waist.

“I know,” she said, trying to control her quivering voice. “Trust me Din, I feel the exact same way about you. And I understand why you’re scared and angry, I would be too. It was a close call but-,”

She placed his hand on her chest, his gloved hand resting over her beating heart. “I’m still here. Alive. We have that now, we have another day. And yeah, any day could be our last together, but I’m not leaving without a fight. You’re stuck with me,” she tried to tease lightly, to ease some of the pressure and anxiety off his shoulders.

After a moment he unwrapped himself from her and grabbed her hand, leading her into another small quarter with a smaller cot, but it was good enough; they didn’t need the space. He turned off the lights as he led her to the cot, Y/N only being able to see his shadowy figure; she started to breathe heavily from all of the overwhelming emotions hitting her all at once. She suspected the same thing was happening to him based on his sporadic movements as he started at his armor.

“Take off your clothes,” he ordered gruffly. A pool of arousal flooded between her legs at the command and immediately got to work.

Din pounced on her as soon as he was undressed – it was the fastest she had ever seen him unclothe – she had barely taken off her pants before he attacked her lips with his, teeth clashing as he used his body to push her downs. She could already feel his hard length rub against her stomach, a bead of pre- cum trailing up and down her stomach as he did so. She moaned into the kiss and gasped when he practically ripped the rest of her clothes off, allowing him to ease his tongue to dance with hers. His lips traveled down her neck, biting down harshly at her sweet spot, causing Y/N to moan loudly and arch her back into him. He groaned as he moved down, biting down at her chest as well and her breasts; he took her nipple into her mouth, nipping gently at it as she ran her fingers through his soft, wavy hair. He kissed all the way down to her dripping and aching heat.

“Please,” Y/N begged sweetly, breathlessly. “That can wait until later. I need you now.”

Normally the Mandalorian would argue, but he was eager to obey, chasing her lips and wrapping her up in his arms tightly.

Y/N could feel every emotion and message through every kiss, every touch on her skin. Soft kisses that said I cherish you. Longing kisses that said I missed you, I will always miss you. Heated kisses that said I need you I want you. It was easy for her to abandoned herself to the kisses, the meanings behind them. She clung onto his back as he slid easily into her, him gasping into her mouth as she struggled to keep her eyes open, staring into the dark figure.

I love you I love you I love you.

Din didn’t need to tell her, she felt it with every shift of his hips, with every kiss he laid on her. With the way he held her, as if he was afraid she was going to disappear. The way he seemed to be struggling to keep his composure, forehead refusing to leave hers as their breaths intertwined. His body was shaking with all the overwhelming senses, and she thought herself she was going to implode from his love; it was as hot as fire, as soft as feathers, as sweet as dessert.

“I love you,” Y/N groaned into his ear. “Stars I love you, Din. So much.”

She was close to tears from her admission and from the pleasure itself. She felt him shudder at her declaration and pushed into her faster, Y/N unable to keep her noises of pleasure at bay. His hand – which was sure to leave a bruise on her hip – travelled down to her thigh to hike her leg up higher around his waist, allowing him to hit at a deeper spot, making her see white behind her lids.

“Oh!” She gasped as he went harder, his grunts bringing her closer and closer to her release.

A hand wrapped itself tightly in her hair, not enough to hurt, but enough to reign himself in as he, too, was getting closer.

“One day I’ll tell you everything,” he said breathlessly. “I’ll tell you fucking everything. I’ll tell you how you’re the fucking best thing that has ever happened to me. How you’re too good for this world, about how you deserve – shit – the entire world. I’ll tell you about how badly I want to show you everything I am, to take off my helmet and be done with the creed. How it eats me up when I can’t give you everything you fucking deserve.”

She didn’t want him to stop, his words only fueling her love and desire for him. He brought his hand down between them, rubbing her clit. She let out a chocked gasp, nails racking down his hardened back.

“I’ll tell you all of this and more more thoroughly, on a day when there’s no danger, no monsters around. When you can finally see me. When my heart won’t play hide and seek with yours. I have to believe that we can have that because you believe it. I will never stop fighting for you, Y/N Y/L/N.”

Gods this was too much. Her velvety walls clenched around his cock, stuttering around it as they both moaned through their releases. He didn’t make any moves of disconnecting his body from hers and she was content with that. She rubbed her hand up and down his sweaty back as they caught their breaths, their chests moving up and down in sync. Tears did then fall from her eyes, but they were happy ones.

Finally Din moved his head from the crook of her neck, cupping her cheek and kissed her. His lips were slightly chapped still but softer this time. She made a noise of discomfort when he slowly pulled out of her, him giving her thigh an apologetic tap as he went to gather a wet cloth to clean them up with. She was expecting him to get dressed after, but instead he laid down next to her, pulling her body into his, arms wrapped around each other with the tips of their noses pressed together.

Y/N still couldn’t see his face in the dark room, but she felt as though she had already seen all of him. She didn’t need to see his face to love him, to know that their love was real and true. She smiled at the thought and buried her head in his chest as she slowly fell back asleep to his hand running through her hair.

Tags: @momc95​, @treehousemagicblog​, @riverquartzuniverse​, @beepbeepyabitch, @smol-flower-kiddo​, @harps-for-days​, @teenagedirtbagg2​, @goththespian​

[silverselfshippingchaos]

[dorky-self-shipper] 🎫 here’s a gush pass :3 feel free to gush about whichever f/o you want, however much you want, then send this ask to 3 other selfshippers

Oh, my friend!!! Ahhh thank you so much for sending this in!! I have been a bit iffy because some things in my life have been piling up, but!!! I am so excited to dig into this!!! I really need a good gushing session haha!

Today's target for gushing hours with your girl Ash is none other than Yaag Rosch!

This ended up being pretty long, and is a mix of lore, screaming, keyboard smashes, his gorgeous design, and more screaming.

Saying that this man lives in my head rent free is an understatement. He is all I think about it. Honestly, I think it's funny considering Yaag's role in FF13. He's only around in the first game, and shows up in like five cutscenes.

Also. We get crumbs of him in the novels. More on that later. Back to the game.

All he does is "hey yall suck" "your lives don't matter" "uhh i need to kill you guys" "oh wait no i'm not evil" "*dies*"

But!!! He's very cool!! His character is so interesting to me. He's so driven to do whatever it takes, but beneath his actions, there's always an edge of hesitation. He seems like he comes off as so sure of himself, but... I'm not sure about that. Now, I can't say anything for sure because the writers hate him, I really liked those few moments where we get to see his actual thoughts.

For example, "Do you think we want to Purge our own people?!" And things like that where you see him question his orders. I feel like there's a lot of underlying hatred, distrust, and overall fear of the system.

Also, his development from "They aren't people, they're targets." to "I'll trust in your humanity." Gets me every single time.

Also don't get me started on his "if this is my punishment... i accept it." when he's bleeding line.

I am here to gush, not analyze. But both are happening anyway.

I feel as though he puts a lot of thought into what he says and how he acts, and I really do admire that.

For context, Lieutenant Colonel Yaag Rosch is this military higher-up guy. I remember seeing him for the first time and my jaw simply dropping. I know that these games have a history with hot villains. After all, I am an FF7 fan. I have seen the SOLDIERS, I have seen the Turks, I've seen Rufus. They're all hot.

There. I said it.

This intro scene gave us some damn good food. Like??? The silver hair??? The ponytail??? The scar on his forehead??? The overly dramatic speech about how the protagonists need to be eliminated??AJKLFNAWKJFNAWKLJFNWILEN.

(Also, I'm beginning to see the resemblance he has to Felix. I am a very predictable woman, aren't I?)

I am actually going to scream. He’s so handsome!!! His jaw!! His eyes are such a pretty color too!!! I wanna give him a kiss ahhh!! Especially on his forehead scar!!! He's so... woah.

Also, he has a really, really nice voice. Like??? WOW. I want this man to like. narrate my life. Here, lemme find some clips of him talking.

Here. Enjoy.

This one is a fan favorite as well.

It's not a Rick roll. I promise.

..... Unless?

Anyways, as time went on, I realized that he's actually such a deep and interesting character?? He gets done dirty by the writers and the game, but the potential he has makes me so excited!! There's so much material to work off of!!! Truly one of the more interesting villains the trilogy has to offer. Honestly, it's kind of difficult going through the second game knowing that he isn't there.

However, it's also difficult going through the second game because I??? Can't beat?? The goddamn boss fight??? I'm also playing on easy mode. I didn't struggle this much during the first game either. What the hell, Ash.

Back to the actual topic.

I'm gonna start off with his design before we delve into s/i lore and fun tidbits.

(His coat is so cool... Do you think he'd let me wear it? I'd probably waddle around in it because he's pretty tall and I. I am not.

He's around 6'2 (around almost 188 cm..? I think?), but take into account his boots too. Which means that normally he's slightly taller. That means that he's about a foot taller than me. That means that I'm pretty much the perfect height to bury my face in his chest. *screams*)

Talk about a kickass design. He's really cool to look at. Not only, uhm, *blushes*, but because of how cool his outfit is too! It does a really good job of portraying that "heyyy i'm super importtanntttt" energy that he has. He carries himself like he's the shit. And you know what? He is.

He's pretty professional. Minus the times he gets kinda pissed. The novels say, and I quote,

"They said he was the most straitlaced man in PSICOM - if you put serious and stubborn in a military uniform, you'd get Colonel Rosch."

And yeah. That basically sums it up.

Also, there's this scene where he gets all pissed and pulls out his sword and I'm over here like *insert debby ryan hair thing here*. I'm telling you, it's always the sword boys that get me. I'm sure you've noticed that by now. I don't know what it is but. It's a thing.

Oh!!! Oh!!! Speaking of the *tucks hair behind ear*, there's this one scene where he's chasing the protagonists. And he goes, "Clever, aren't you?"

*SCREAMS*

That scene is truly a masterpiece. Thank you for the good food, Squeenix. I remember having to take a moment to just pause and regather myself. Actually, I had to do that the first time I saw him too-

I wasn't alone at the time when he was introduced so I was just silently like "ohmygodhellosir ajrfnaklwenjklwenjklrn" but oh my GOODNESS.

My s/i works with him! She's pretty much his right hand woman. She always has reports and intel on all their missions ready to go! I find it cute how well they work together, be it for mission-related matters, or just when they're relaxing together.

Just like pretty much all of my other s/is, she's a raging academic and total nerd. In the first game, they basically live on this human paradise called Cocoon. It ends up not being so great because the gods want to murder humanity but anyways! Education is pretty much free and you can study whatever you're passionate about. That's why she has studied just so many things.

She's not exactly the type who aspired to join the military, but alas! Things happened. I like to think of it as a "heyyyy y'all needed my help once and then once turned to twice and twice to thrice and then i never left" type thing.

Oh, and then she fell in love with Yaag while she was there.

Her cheery attitude is a direct opposite to his, but they're also able to have some very serious conversations with each other. I love their dynamic so much! Also, he can get a bit softer when he's opening up to her and,,, Soft Yaag??? Hoo boy.

Her motives and beliefs tend to align a bit more with the Cavalry branch, but i feel as though she fits in better with PSICOM. Also, the book describes the soldiers to be a bunch of dumbass dorks and just the thought of her smiling and cracking jokes with all of Yaag's men make me super happy.

Oh and she gets a cool uniform too! Because I said so.

Now, they've known each other for years by the time the end of the first game rolls around. They're happy together, maybe even engaged! It can go one of two ways here. He either dies or he doesn't.

I like adhering really closely to canon with my ships (*laughs in genesis angst*) but I also think it would be a blast if he were to survive.

In the novels after his death, some recordings of his are found. It's basically him talking about how the government sucks from the inside. A character finds these and reveals them to the public to get rid of the old government and an invite a newer one that actually cares about the people. However, it's never quite stated how he got those recordings. And that's where Ash steps in.

She brings them to his attention and helps him out, but then returns to live with the rest of the remaining soldiers in that camp they set up in the second novel. They all look up to her as a leader-type, which I find is really funny because she doesn't exactly have the qualifications? She worked with PSICOM, but was never exactly a soldier. But hey, it's right after the world (quite literally) fell apart, I don't think that anybody cares about that.

Also, there's another chapter where Snow ends up visiting, and she has a friendly chat with him!!! She helped out the protagonists a little bit near the end of the first game, so they have a slight idea of who each other are, but that doesn't exactly change the fact that she fell under the category of villain for a lot of it, despite not actually being a bad person. I also think that their dynamic would be fun. Snow also just makes me really happy LMAO.

I think that this version of Ash is really fun just because of how much the experience hardens her? She spends a lot of time grieving. Also!!! Whether or not she makes a cameo in 13-2 (maybe near the ruins early game?) is totallllyyyy up to you hehe! I think it would be neat for her to talk to the protagonists of that game, especially since Yaag was the one who orchestrated the Purge and at the ruins, there's a huge monument of the names of people who were killed there.

Also, whether or not she has a son here is up to you. I like to think of all my ideas all happening in alternate timelines so everything I want can happen without stepping on other events? I imagine their child to have Yaag's pretty silver hair with Ash's brown eyes.

Also, 13-2 is about time travel so like. The protagonists meeting their child in the future when he's all grown up? Good stuff.

But hey, in the main timeline she's alone after Yaag's death. She helps the other characters. I also think that in time, she does work for the Academy? I mentioned that she's pretty nerdy earlier, so that definitely helps out. She's super cool!!! Such a badass!!!

Now, on the flipside of things, what if he survived? Then what happens? shameless self promo

Yaag still has those recordings, and they do still reach Captain Rygdea. They both live in the small village that the remnants of PSICOM created. It's a sweet life. Are fankids a thing in their future? Yeah, probably.

I feel like Yaag would be a really good dad. I headcanon that he has a very strong relationship with his own father as well. He's caring and stern, but also knows when to turn down the serious scale. The novels also say that he likes kids!?!?!? I know I've screamed about this point like 24892 times on my blog. But.

It's so cute??? Who would expect this super serious and mean man who quite literally says that the protagonists aren't people, they're targets to like children of all things???? It really is my favorite thing ever just because of how cute it is. I also have a few tiny cousins in my family, so him playing with them makes me very soft too.

("Would you please stop tugging on my hair- Ash, this is not a laughing matter!" "Oh, but it so is.")

I think that detail really helps hint at him having a more gentle side? And I adore that.

Also, I mentioned how Snow pays a visit to the PSICOM camp after the events of the first game? I think that would be very interesting with Yaag there because before Yaag dies in canon, Snow says, "Stay alive. We'll see you when it's over."

And now he finally gets to see him. The conversation would get surprisingly deep and definitely dive into Yaag's motives and real thoughts about his actions in the game. I really enjoy the few interactions those two have in the game.

Anyways, now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's dig into the meat and potatoes of this ship.

In 13-2, they get a separate dlc side story just to themselves. Because I said so. I'm not sure how the plot of this works, but it's basically them exploring Gran Pulse together. Maybe to map things out? Maybe to get better acquainted with the world they thought was a hell their whole lives? Maybe there's some sort of big mission they have to do? We'll figure it out.

Basically, it's a whole side story of them exploring and kicking monster ass together. The combat is regular 13 combat.

Yaag has his sword along with some explosives (we see him carry some grenades at the end when he blew himself up). And Ash also has a sword because I like swords.

In the game, usually only l'Cie, or magic god slaves, can use magic. However, after the fal'Cie (magic gods) go poof at the end of the end of the first game, some normal humans can use magic? It makes no sense and exists only for plot convenience, but I'm not complaining because it makes my plot easier too.

My point is, Ash can use magic! Because A) she's quirky mage material B) we need a balanced team C) Every single version of Ash so far has been a mage. D) I like magic a lot. Would be my go-to as well.

Also, if you're interested in how they work in battle, roles divide up very nicely between them.

Yaag has: -Commando (physical attacks) -Sentinel (beefy tanks) -Sabuteur (debuffing enemies)

Ash has: -Ravager (magic goes brrr) -Medic (i think you know) -Synergist (buffing allies) -Commando (physical attacks)

Maybe Yaag could get medic too to balance off the load in battle? They're a blast in combat because they really do compliment each other.

Anyways, back to the adventure.

It's the two of them traveling around. The main focus of it is their conversations as they travel. There's a lot of fun banter. Ya know how like when you're walking around in Naughty Dog games and your characters are just chatting? Yeah. That.

Their conversations are super random and they cover pretty much every single topic ever. They go from really serious to them just being stupid. I love their friendly banter.

Also, when they set up camp and are about to sleep, we get to see sleepy Yaag in action. And do you know what that means?

It means we get to see Yaag with his hair done a bit looser, maybe even down!!! Yaag with his hair down is all I want to see. It's what we deserve. It's what we need. The day that I see Yaag with his hair down is the day i achieve true happiness LMAO.

It's what we need.

Ash playing with his hair??? Yes, I most definitely think so.

Oh and there is totally a "Yaag, I'm cold." "Allow me to help remedy that. *pulls her closer*" type moment because they're cute like that.

All in all, their travels are really fun. Maybe somewhere around there they run into the protagonists? Either from the first game or the second game. I think that would be a fun mess.

I feel like Yaag can show a softer side of him around her and that makes me really happy. He deserves to be happy and I love him very much.

I think about him all the time, and just the thought of him holding me makes me so happy. He really is just adorable.

Before I wrap this up, I have a few more things I want to speak about! Firstly, allow me to share one of my favorite pictures of him because oh. my. god.

*screams*

The urge to backhug him!!! Ahh!!! He's so cute!!!! I just wanna hold him aelajflanef.

One of my favorite pre-relationship moments from them is this one time where Yaag is pretty down in the dumps, and Ash is talking to him about it and offering her advice. And as she talks, she gently places a hand over his (they're seated side by side btw). He looks up at her in shock, and she takes back her hand is like, "O-oh! I'm so sorry, I should've asked first, I just thought tha-"

And then he just snatches her hand back and gently holds it. You can see the tips of his ears burning red haha! I think that they're pretty cute ajfwnjklef

She always tries her best to take care of him, too! He needs a hug, and she is more than happy to provide. She always tries to remind him to eat his meals on time and such, even if she can be questionable at following her own advice at times. She can also be a bit of a tease sometimes, so he can get pretty annoyed (not really, he thinks it's cute) sometimes.

However, he also does his best to take care of her. Would he pull the "that's an order." card after she refuses to rest, pulling several late-nighters for work? Yeah. Probably. He's very caring, even if he can come off as very serious and scary sometimes.

To wrap things up, I love Yaag Rosch.

Thank you for your time.

[faelune-home]

A Blade of Fallen Petals

(A/N: Sometimes it’s the major story NPCs, and sometimes its the smaller ones. They were only around for so long, but their death still hits like a brick. ;-;

That’s Wilred here. A little story about missing him, and coping with that. I used Lyse as a bouncing off NPC for miqo!Fu partly due to location (since the mini questline that acknowledges him and gives him a resting place in Stormblood goes into the Lochs) but also I find Lyse an interesting character to discuss death, just because for as much as its not presented in game, she’s lost a lot. She’s probably quite familiar with it.

I want to write more of these NPC remembrance stories, and I’ve already done a few prior - one for Minfilia, and two as part of FFXIV Write 2020, both actually featuring Lyse incidentally - but I’d like to do more.

Didn’t do too much editing after I finished writing, so apologies for any iffy errors.

@ffxiv-writers)

Cracking bones pierced the air as Lyse stretched, finally freed from the stuffiness of the castle meeting room. It felt like she’d been up and moving and chatting since dawn had broken, but she could rest at last. Spying the sun in the sky, seeing it just hovering above the walls of the Quarter, she let out a breath of relief. It would be nearing meal time, and she was starving. And she’d have to consider collecting a plate for Fordola as well…

“Well well, if it ain’t Lyse? I figured you’d be busy till sundown,” a voice called, snapping the woman from her thoughts. Gundobald approached with a wave, an affable smile on his face, which she gladly returned.

“It’s getting close enough though, isn’t it? So technically I have been,” she countered, nodding in the direction of the lowering star. “But it’s good to see you, especially after so long.”

“Likewise, lass, likewise. And it's good to be back in Ala Mhigo, even if it's only for a day,” the elder man hummed contentedly, looking around the city with pride in his eyes. Lyse couldn’t help but smile at his reaction.

“Right, you said you’d stay behind for those that couldn’t make the trip,” she mused, remembering the arrangement one of her soldiers - his own nephew - had made to transport the Ala Mhigans home, “So what brings you all the way here then? Just seeing the sights? Taking back stories for the older folk back in Thanalan?”

Gundobald tilted his head. “Aye, I suppose I could do that for them. Rhalgr knows even in their last few days, everyone back in Little Ala Mhigo gains a bit of new life being reminded that their home is free now.” Then he shook his head. “But that wasn’t the main reason I came. It was to pay some respects to some old comrades. The ones that couldn’t be here even to hear the news.”

Lyse lowered her head upon hearing this. “I see. I did learn about the old mercenary monument up north. Probably still fitting for everyone else that uh...passed beyond these lands.” Looking back at him, she asked, “So you’re returning home now? Would you like an escort?”

“Nah, I’m not so enfeebled I can’t handle myself on the return trip,” the highlander shook his head, though there was a friendly glint in his eye as he said it, “Better to keep your men here where they’re needed more, Commander. But if you want, you could send someone to go check on the Scions’ Warrior girl by the monument.”

At this, the woman perked up. “Fufu is here? There, I mean?”

“Aye, I figured you would’ve known, that she would’ve told you. She was up there before I arrived, and she’s still there now.” Lyse shook her head, surprise still colouring her features. Gundobald frowned, but he didn’t sound worried when he added, “Well, I’ll let you look into that on your own. Suppose you’ve been so busy you could do with a catch up with your friend. I’ll get started on my way back.”

He waved, wandering off down the cobbled streets, leaving a pondering Lyse to her thoughts.

~*~*~

The woman didn’t wait long before making the decision to venture to the old tomb, leaving behind an order to deliver food to the resistance’s prisoner should Lyse not return in time to do it herself. A bread roll haphazardly stuffed in her own month would do her until then.

The sky was turning a shade of purple by the time she reached the monument, the clouds painted orange and pink in the fading sunlight. A sole figure sat on the quickly chilling stone in front of the pillar, the only other source of light coming from a small lantern mounted on the saddle of a sleeping chocobo nearby.

“Hey,” Lyse called out, making the miqo’te jump and spin around. A hand hovered over the chakram by her waist, however Fufu quickly relaxed at the sight of her old friend. Her flickering tail settled.

“I wasn’t expecting you,” Fufu said as Lyse joined her. The hyur gave the Scion a friendly nudge, lightly scolding her by saying, “Of course you weren’t, ‘cos you never even told me you were here.”

The miqo’te winced, a sheepish smile on her face. “I’m sorry. In my defense I did show up at the palace gates, and I thought about it, but everyone said you were busy pretty much all day. They offered to take a message, but I didn’t want to interrupt or make you take time out if you were doing important stuff.”

“You’re never interrupting,” Lyse chucked, “I’ll always be happy to make time for you or the other Scions if I can. If anything,” she groaned, rolling her shoulder, both girls wincing at the loud crack it let out, “I’d appreciate having an excuse to take a break.”

Fufu nodded. “Alright then, noted.” Both women fell into a comfortable silence, enjoying the quiet as night fell, the sounds of the salt waves lapping at the shore behind them, and Fufu’s noble bird snoring softly next to them, the lantern swinging gently on its hook with each breath the chocobo took. Their faint shadows shifted ever so slightly against the stone structure.

“Who are you here for?” Lyse finally asked, the question having been sitting on her tongue since she’d arrived. Fufu didn’t answer immediately, but Lyse didn’t expect her to. In the meantime she added, “I met Gundobald in the Quarter, he said he came here with you. Or more like you arranged to meet here, I suppose, he said you were already here when he arrived from Little Ala Mhigo.”

Fufu’s tail twitched, managing to brush against the hyuran’s arm.

“Someone I knew once.” Was all she said.

“Did I know them?”

“...Kinda.”

They sat again, Lyse willing to wait for her friend to talk, or even if she didn’t at all. But after a moment, Fufu took in a breath.

“You remember one of the first reports I wrote on my own? For one of my first missions without another Scion watching me.” With a sly smile and a side eye toward her friend, she added, “After the whole thing with the sylphs.”

Lyse inadvertently spluttered as she burst out laughing. “Oh gods! I remember that! Your penmanship was awful, and it was so plain!” 

Lyse was already near falling to the floor from hysterics, however the miqo’te shoved the other woman over with an exaggerated pout all the same, though unable to hide the amusement in her voice as she argued, “Excuse you, I’d never done much writing before then, never mind for a fancy mission report. And what am I supposed to even put in one? ‘Went to Little Ala Mhigo, nobody liked me, I had to save some kids from the amalj’aa’? And it's not like you or Papalymo or anybody else was around to help me write it.”

“I kno- gods,” the hyuran gasped, finally trying to bring her laughter to an end. Given their location, things were sure to take a turn, even if Fufu had started the moment of levity. Indeed the woman in question had turned sombre once more. Lyse coughed, trying to stem her chuckles. “Alright, I’m done.” 

Another breath out to calm herself, then Lyse said, “I mean, really, it was plain, but that’s fine. It did the job it was meant to do - say what happened, what you did - and you were still new to it all. And teaching you wouldn’t have helped, you probably don’t need to write those anymore. So nothing to dwell on anymore. Right?” Fufu shot her a grateful look. Then she looked up at the stone beacon in front of them.

“Well, one of those kids involved in that whole thing, he’s here now.” Lyse flinched, eyes glancing up at the tomb.

“The one that didn’t die in the amalj’aa attack...but he died later as a Brave,” Fufu said, her face eerily straight, yet her eyes already beginning to water. Lyse herself found her eyes drifting to the foggy horizon, a faint memory of a bright eyed, hopeful looking young man dressed in blue coming to mind.

“His name was Wilred,” the miqo’te added without prompt, “And he meant every word of the Braves’ original creed.”

She shook her head, letting out a shaky breath. “I know a few of the folk that believed in what the Braves were meant to be still stuck with the Scions after that whole mess, but Godsdammit, I wish he could’ve been there as well. He just disappeared one day and then h-he was...he’d been left to rot in Urth’s Fount! He d-didn’t deserve that, h-he…”

Her words caught in her throat, and despite pressing her hands against her eyes to stem the oncoming flood, a sob broke from the warrior. Without hesitation, Lyse pulled the miqo’te into her shoulder, letting her friend weep freely. Fufu’s chocobo nearby stirred, letting out a small chirp at the sound of its mistress’ crying. A glance from the monk let the bird settle again, although the tenseness in its haunches betrayed its worry.

“He should’ve been here, I know,” Lyse mumbled gently, rocking to try and calm the other woman. She bit her lip, trying to think of what she could say to soothe her friend, but coming up short. She didn’t know the boy that well, only recognising him as a passing face in the Rising Stones...and one that eventually stopped showing up.

“It’s more than that,” Fufu hiccuped, lifting her head. Her eyes were already red raw. “He started out so angry and desperate, desperate enough for the ascians to notice him and his friends and...and he was the only one to make it out alive. And that changed him, and he wanted to do good after that. And the Braves were supposed to be his second chance to do that and-- By the Twelve, Lyse, he was younger than us.” Her voice cracked, and Lyse winced.

Still, the woman leaned her head forward against the other’s in a reassuring gesture. Fufu sniffed.

“I know I can’t go back and change things. I can wish and hope and say what I could’ve done instead - and I wish I’d watched him more now, I wish I’d taken Riol worries to heart, and I wish we’d never crossed paths with Ilberd, that I had cut him down where he stood if I knew then what I do now - but I know that won’t change anything about what happened before.” She let out a heavy sigh after her rant, finally seeming to calm. “I wish for a lot of things Lyse.”

“Me too.”

“I wish he had a chance.”

“I know. I wish all the time that Papalymo was still here to help me. He’d keep the resistance in line better than I could.” At that, the keeper chuckled.

Another sniff. “It’s moments like this...losing people I feel like I could’ve saved, it makes me try harder. So I don’t have to lose anyone else. So normal people can have a chance after hardship.”

“For those we have lost?” Lyse said, a small smile on her lips. Fufu smiled back, nodding.

“I wish they didn’t have to die, but I won’t let their deaths be in vain. But...but I guess it all feels like so much sometimes. And I need to be alone to deal with it. I know I could stay with the other Scions and they wouldn’t judge me for it, but just every now and then...” She trailed off.

“I get that,” the hyuran chuckled, ruffling Fufu’s hair, “And that’s fine, good even. It shows that you care. That the whole Warrior of Light title isn’t just for show. Better that than coming across like some soulless killing machine.” 

“I’m proud of what I do, since I can help so many people, but sometimes it can feel like a weight,” Fufu pouted. 

Lyse sighed. “I know the feeling.”

The highlander stood, her knees cracking, offering a hand to Fufu as well. The chocobo finally woke after a whistle from its rider, stumbling to its feet.

“We’ll go back to the Quarter together, and you can spend the night with me. I can send a soldier or call Tataru’s linkshell to let the Scions know,” Lyse suggested. Too worn down by her emotional outburst to argue, Fufu nodded, the idea sounding appealing at that.

“And in future,” the woman continued, “if you come here again, I insist you let me know. I won’t let you sit here on your own. This sort of thing is better with a little support, isn’t it?”

Fufu looked up at the stars above, the shimmering dots reflecting in her wide watery eyes. She smiled, looking back at her friend.

“I’d appreciate that.”

[nocherryblood]

Kinda-cliché OCs Part One- Eli/Emily

Never really posted about my OCs but eh. I'm kind of in the mood to. Skip if you want. Anyway, here's my (Gravity Falls kinda) OCs kind-of-oh-so-cliche backstory:

+ Emilia "Cassiopeia" Lotté. Mostly known by Emily, Cassie, or Forest. Has many fake names, and given names from other demons.

+ Very kind "immortal" demi-demon born in London, early WWI

+ Lost her father to WWII, her mother to demons, her older siblings to the Government, and her younger older siblings to Scientists. The oldest to live only survived to their late 20s- when Emily was in her early 30s

+ Kidnapped as a young teen, experimented on (in place of her siblings; to save them for as long as possible), had her demonic half awakened

+ Gained new powers, senses, and abilities. She escaped in her late teens, but not unscathed. Left with deep buried trauma.

+ Met a few nice guys in her 20s, never really hit it off. The only one that did was killed in an explosion at work, unfortunately.

+ Eventually fell for a young sourceress around the same age as her, named Eli, (later discovered to be cursed), and they got along as great friends. It led to something more after a good few years of living together (though, however, Eli had to keep her relationship with Em a secret).

(+ Elianna Elisanna Elizabeth Summers- a.k.a. Eli (pronunced "eee-lie"). Young sourceress. Previously spent approx. 60 years frozen in time as part of a time curse.)

+ Moved to Gravity Falls in the late 00s and settled down for a while. Both liked the town, but they preferred to just watch on from the outskirts.

+ At one point they break up after Emily accidentally uses her powers on Eli in the middle of a heated argument.

+ Eli's vision quickly deteriorates after that until she is left almost completely blind in one eye, and with a huge scar over her face. Emily's magic messes with her body, eventually leaving her skin greyish-white and her left eye seemingly iced-over.

+ Eli tries convince Emily that it wasn't her fault and that she completely forgives Emily, but Emily won't have it. She's secretly terrified that her demonic nature is taking over.

+ Soon, Emily becomes so unstable and unwell that her demonic side of herself and her human side start to split off rather than merge together (as a last ditch attempt for her mind to save herself), and she now has a tendency to lose control, especially if her emotions are running high.

+ Back on her own, Eli tries to leave Gravity Falls for a while to see if she can find someone powerful enough to help Emily (and maybe, if they can, herself too).

+ However, when she tries to leave she can't. Emily's magic transferred some of it's weirdness onto her, leaving her stuck. She's eventually taken in by the Society of the Blind Eye (or in other storylines, by some othee cult, Society, or secret Government program) and kept hidden as a coveted secret because of her magic.

+ Meanwhile, Emily, still freaking out, freaks out even more once she realises Eli is gone. From here, depending on the storyline, she either goes into a hysteria or depression, thinking Eli left her out of hatred for what she did, or Emily will notice that something's not quite right and goes on a 'quest' to find, and rescue, her girlfriend.

+ Either way, it's probably worth mentioning that Emily meets Bill multiple times during all this, and that she's known to be kind of iffy with him.

+ You see, whenever he would see the pair, he used to tease Eli a lot over silly things, and kept trying to make stupid deals with her, thinking she was so naïve. Emily Definitely holds a grudge.

(+ Also, once again depending on the storyline, Emily has, on a few occasions, started off a relationship of sorts with Bill and, uh... it didn't really go far. He ended up being more like a demonic tutor to her sometimes, as well as kind of being a bastard (a slick, gentlemanly one, at that), and on top of that, he was secretly trying to manipulate her to let her full demonic nature take control over her spirit, sooo, um... major fucking grudges, anyone?)

+ Emily now goes around posing as a kindly professor and witch (well... okay, she's not posing being kind- because she is kind, extremely so; she is, however, way more serious and solemn sometimes), trying to gain the locals' trust and find out, through government records, rumours, and word of mouth on the street, exactly where her "best friend" has gone.

Aaaand... okay, that's all I can think to put her right now. If anyone is interested (not that they are, but oh well XD), I'd be happy to share my other OCs as well, like my Obey Me ones, my Promised Neverland ones and... well, I have pretty much at least one for every fandom I talk about here, so, uh... go wild, I guess :)

[itsclydebitches]

I'm just curious. Do you ever feel like people processed their outrage over vol 7 in your ask box? Also one quick question for you. The 'military is bad' take is kinda weird considering every season up to this point slammed home that the de-unified huntsman society of other kingdoms was easily overwhelmed by Salem. Plus, if Atlas is weird because it combined its military and huntsman, what the heck is every other kingdom using its own separated military for??

Sometimes! Which, for the record, isn’t automatically a bad thing. God knows I processed my frustration via the recaps/answers. Asks are just an extension of that. But yeah, when we’re upset about something (even a “meaningless” something like a web-series) one of the easiest ways to feel better is to express that frustration to someone who shares your opinion. Though sadly that means that if I don’t share their opinion the anon might not be getting what they came for. Some people want my take on an aspect of the show. Other people assume they already know my take and are confident in going, “This was just the worst, right?” ... and then when I respond with, “I actually don’t think that was a problem” they’re disappointed. Just because they were looking for that catharsis and didn’t get it. It doesn’t happen often because it’s pretty easy to tell where I stand on most of these topics (lol), but every once in a while I do get a case of an anon essentially going, “I’m frustrated by this! Let’s process it together!” and I’m on a completely different wavelength of, “I’m not frustrated at all because I quite liked that part.” 

Also yeah, as always the world building here is... iffy lol. Do we even know if other kingdoms still have a military? I kind of got the sense that Huntsmen weren’t just separated from them, but were their replacement. Which, fine. We’ve certainly seen throughout the show that one Huntsmen is worth 50 regular soldiers. If it works, it works. However, what I find to be a problem is how the ‘military is bad’ theme ignores the actual issues we see with Atlas’ armed forces as well as ignoring its strengths: 

I’d argue that the most concrete moment of ‘this isn’t working’ occurs when Ironwood brings his army to Beacon. However, Ozpin doesn’t say, “James it’s horrible that you have an army.” He specifically criticizes how the army is used: it scares people. You shouldn’t use such a heavy hand when a lighter touch will do. Especially when fear breeds dissent and brings grimm. So what does Ironwood do? When he’s put into a position where an army is necessary - we have very few Huntsmen and grimm keep swarming the city - he nevertheless tries to lessen fear as much as he can. He puts Penny on the front lines, giving the people a figurehead. That’s his light touch. Whenever he can he sends her in to protect civilians, both because she’s wonderfully powerful and because a cute girl rescuing you is better than the men in armor. Which brings me to the army’s strength: 

Namely that they’re the numbers Huntsmen desperately need. Sure, Ruby can carve through a ton of grimm in a minute, but how long can she keep that up? How many places can she reach? She - and her friends - certainly can’t be everywhere at once. Ironwood’s men may not be particularly powerful, but their weapons can take out the swarms of grunt grimm that, frankly, would tear open the average civilian. Someone without aura and training doesn’t care if that’s an itty bitty baby grimm or the biggest bad they’ve ever seen: they’re dead either way. The grimm are themselves an army. That means you need an army to hold them at bay, especially when you consider the size of an entire city. You need those numbers to take out as many grimm as possible while your grand total of 17 huntsmen are doing the heavy lifting. Like needing 3 or 4 to take out one massive grimm. While they’re doing that? Smaller grimm are getting by and killing people. So you need a line to hold them back. Even if it’s just holding them back. As we saw at the beginning of the volume, the men kept the grimm at bay long enough for civilians to run and for RWBYJNR to arrive on the scene. They might not be able to kill grimm like a Huntsmen can, but their job is still very important. 

Problem is, the story doesn’t take either of these things into account. Neither how Ironwood tries to take Ozpin’s advice nor the benefits that the army provides. RWBY provides an incredibly simplistic view of, “The army looks menacing walking the streets so therefore it’s bad.” Which, frankly, is a knee-jerk reaction built on real world politics as opposed to RWBY’s own worldbuilding and context. In our world armies are unnecessarily violent. In our world armies are corrupt. In our world armies commit heinous crimes and abandon their soldiers once they’ve left. There is a LOT wrong with real world armies, perhaps including their existence at all. In RWBY’s world though, all we know about Ironwood’s army is that a) it exists and b) it’s helping save lives. Literally. This isn’t - like our world - one army of people set against another army of people. It’s an army set against monsters. We do not have monsters in our lives, threatening to eat people if someone with a gun (or a scythe) isn’t there to cut them down. That’s why our reality can’t map onto RWBY’s, but it’s what RT banks on. They want people to have that instinctual reaction of, “Armies are bad. Authorities are bad. A white man holding a lot of power is bad. I know this because these things are causing a lot of problems in the real world,” without acknowledging that RWBY has very, very different issues. An endless army of grimm that can tear apart anyone without aura changes things. As does the threat of an immortal grimm queen hell bent on their destruction. You can’t rely on your audience’s experiences with real world armies and then apply that to the situation, “Massive, fanged beasts are coming to eat everyone!” I get that the core group are our heroes here, but it makes total sense that a world wouldn’t rely entirely on Huntsmen to protect them. Especially when we’ve seen/heard of a ton of Huntsmen die. They have low numbers to begin with and it’s not like they’re all sticking around... When you’re dealing with something like the grimm, you need all the help you can get. 

[a9saga]

when my maternal grandfather died six months ago i made a long rambling about how everything in my life since ninth grade just went full circle and i meant it. i ended up being okay, and i knew i would, but that was all very intensely crashing over me at once.

my grandmother died this morning. other side, my dad’s mother. it was okay, she was safe, she was being taken care of and she was with her children and her husband. i’d only heard she went into hospice yesterday, she couldn’t have been in there for more than a day.

if you know me well enough that i’ve ever talked to you about my family, you might remember i really love my sweet and beautiful little irish grandmother. i do. or even if you follow my blog, she’s made several mentions in my own posts over the years. she’s my biggest role model. i could go on for days. simply put, every trait of mine that i most like about myself is something i’ve had in common with her. and she loved me for the same things i loved in her, i think.

that last sentence is the only reflection i’ve realized upon finally losing her. i only realized that one when my dad pointed it out last night. i was mumbling on my whole spiel about how much i love my grandmother i knew i would be losing within the next day, you know the one i largely skipped in this post because i would have gone on for too long. my dad said that i also brought her so much joy, that she also thought that i was sweet, and beautiful, and it lit her up to see me, etc etc etc.

i’d not thought of that as much. the last many times i saw her, her memory was so far gone she didn’t know who i was or who my mother was. she would generally recognize my dad and she would ask him if he was married and if he had kids. that’d happen every few minutes whenever we’d see her, that she would be going over the list of basic questions. she wanted to enjoy everyone’s presence, and to some extent she did, but it was so hard for her to genuinely partake.

connie was in there somewhere but she was a shell of herself. over the past year, especially in the past four months, it was apparent she was getting exponentially closer to the end.

i always knew she’d be the hardest to lose. i’ve been afraid of it forever. and i think she will be. i have two grandparents left but i just. i just know this one. and it feels only reinforced by my feeling that her death doesn’t change anything.

i have realized nothing new from this. there’s no circle encompassing this moment in my life. at this time i think more constantly what i have always thought of her. i am just devastated to be without her. in place of piecing together what she meant to me, since i was already well aware of that all my life, i am thinking more of how she was years ago. i am not realizing. i am remembering. what i remember is what i’ve thought much less about for a while, because i’ve only been so worried about her now for at least 4 years. at least. and that’s only been my major concerns.

but if there was someone who deserved this soon, it was her. in some respects, for a while i’d felt like i lost her already, such as the fact that she didn’t constantly remember and understand anyone but her husband. she was so weak recently. she just needed to rest.

if you were wondering, she would have turned 91 if she made it to the end of this month. i will be okay, again. i keep tearing up every few minutes thinking about her. it doesn’t last long but it recurs a lot. i don’t feel the disbelief i did with my grandfather’s death. i simply feel awful.

with my grandfather, even in recent months there have been tears, bad dreams, and recently at work an old man came in who looked and moved and talked very much like my grandfather had since his first battle with his brain tumor. those make me sad but much of the time now i just remember that he’s actually gone, not out of sight, out of mind. i’ve made my peace, it’s just more like i largely don’t buy it. he’s not dead, i just haven’t seen him in a while. that’s how it feels and i just remind myself that it’s not true.

well i don’t know that i will think of connie like that in six months. because frank, her husband of 68 years, is going to be alone and no one can bear the thought of how scary that is. he doesn’t know life like this. so if you’re the praying type, please utter his name for me. he’s a very strong man, but he’s very old.

i wanted to say one last thing. remember when i said seventeen was once again comforting me when my grandfather died? well i’ve been listening to cnblue today. i don’t know why. i will not sit here and tell you my cnblue story (although one day i mean to bc oh boy) but i was a fan of them years before i got into kpop, when i was 13. it was the summer before eighth grade. i actually know like, none of their work that they put out after i was 13. i was mostly into their japanese stuff, their korean singles back then were so much more poppy and colorful and i liked them but not as much. i still kind of feel that way. you know what song of theirs i was kinda iffy about liking as much as i did? love girl. oh my god. for the record they dropped that song and album on my 12th birthday, which inherently cursed them (nothing good ever happened while i was 12). i was too not-like-other-girls to deal with the one video of theirs that went too far in making it clear that the boys in this band were cute (ugh). but now i’m listening to that song a lot in particular because it makes me feel very light and pink and warm and homey and to put it simply it fills me with a comfort that i think i need after losing my feminine hero. that doesn’t make any sense but i feel it. i’ve not actually played anything since i started typing this so i’m gonna go back to that now.

ps: any friends or mutuals, if we talk lots or little or we haven’t in a while, are welcome to send me literally whatever. if it’s related to this, unrelated, or whatever, if you are thinking of reaching out to say something i am going to appreciate anything. you can send kind words or a meme or cute animals or a song rec. i will say that i’m going to be quiet for the time being so i may not reply back very quickly. i’m not ignoring you i’m just taking space. i may be like this for a little bit. but if you actually read all of this, thank you. thank you so much.

[dukeofonions]

Reaction Redux (I know it doesn’t make sense but it sounds cool)

Alright, here is my initial reaction to Putting Others First: Selfishness vs Selflessness Redux.

It’s finally here, I’ve watched it a total of two times and currently have it on in the background as I type this, and I have a lot of feelings. All of which would be too much for one post, so after I do this I’ll be making a few separate posts addressing certain points I’d like to expand on further. 

So what I’m going to do is have the video playing as I write this out, that way I don’t miss out anything I wanted to discuss. Basically it’s not gonna be a full on analysis, just a lot of random ramblings with what I hope are some insightful gems sprinkled throughout. Consider these my notes for all my future serious analysis posts. 

Good? Great. Let’s go.  (Also spoilers under the cut)

So, how did I feel as I watched the video for the first time? Well considering I got the notification for the video while I was still at work, I couldn’t get as excited as I wanted to be about it because I didn’t get off until 8pm and had to deal with one too many dunderheads so I was pretty grumpy once I got off. 

However, as soon as I got home and retreated to the safety of my isolation fortress (aka my bedroom) I was finally able to get excited as I got on my laptop and pulled up the video and let me just say I was a mess the entire time. I missed my boys!!! I knew they wouldn’t all be present, but I still missed my boys!!! And I loved seeing them again!!! 

First things first, that song at the beginning! I think it’s called Review Redux (correct me if I’m wrong) it’s such a freaking bop and I wish it was longer because I could listen to it all day. I loved the artwork and little details that went into their characters, and how each of the circles represented who was singing/talking by their colors. Fun stuff and a great way to recap everything! As well as foreshadow things to come within the episode… “If our goals aligned with his what would that say?” Roman you’re in for a rude awakening bud… 

Also, the little moment near the beginning where Patton is about to shut Thomas’ negative thinking down, but stops himself and allows Thomas to explain why he feels that way. Showing that he’s learned to ease up just a little since he learned to do so in Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts. Good for you Patton. 

Speaking of Patton, oh he is so confused. I understand where he’s coming from, and honestly everything he said are things I have been taught growing up, and this is something I’ll address in another post because I have a lot of things to say about it. But just know that I adore the development Patton has been going through and watching him grow and mature. 

Oh yes, I must mention I was pleasantly surprised to see Logan. I didn’t think he’d show up in this episode, or at the very least have a brief appearance, but I love how he took part and by far the funniest part in this episode (to me) is when he had so much to say in one little post that it popped up and hit Patton in the nose. It was one of the few moments where I laughed out loud and I rewound it a few times on my first viewing. 

Plus Thomas being more concerned about the blinds than Patton. My type of humor. And Roman actually gets to use his sword for once, good for him! 

(Funny enough as I typed this the video got to that part at the exact same time so I got a nice little laugh again) 

Which brings up my next point: Logan getting yoinked after Patton skips his dialogue. No one talks about how he does his little impression of that philosopher, am I the only one who found that utterly adorable? 

Let Logan geek out over philosophers please. He clearly loves it so much. 

Then we get to Roman believing he’s the one responsible for everything, wanting to give up the driver’s seat to Patton. And just… This exchange of dialogue:

Thomas: “Roman, I only mean well when I say…” Thomas: “That that is the stupidest thing you have ever said.” Roman: “Oh Thomas, you’re just blowing smoke.” 

I don’t know why I enjoy this so much but I do. Give me more of this. I crave it now.

And I just need to make a whole post about Patton in this video, there is so much to unpack with him alone.

Looking back and noticing that Thomas only starts listening to Logan after he’s been replaced by Deceit kinda hurts. 

Speaking of which, can we appreciate how much better Deceit has gotten at impersonating Logan? Looks like he took Roman’s advice and focused on the little things. Good for him. 

Alright, one of my absolute favorite parts from this episode and where things really start to shine: Patton freaks out and turns into a giant frog because he’s so desperate to have an answer for them he flips and honestly, sounds a little crazy. Which, I don’t know why but I find it both menacing and hilarious at the same time? 

Also the fact he turns into a frog because he was talking about Frogger earlier, nice touch! (And Lilypadton that’s so cute) 

Then we get probably the single greatest character entrance in the history of character entrances. We find out that Deceit finally reveals himself and steps in to stand up to Patton and get him to see how his actions have been having a negative effect on Thomas. 

The way his voice changes from Logan’s to his own, his music kicking in, “The Lord of the Lies” oh my gosh it’s all just perfect! Also Roman’s “Reptilian Rapscallion! Reptilian Rapscallion! We’ve got a code yellow!” 

And if I may: Roman: “What have you done with Logan?!” Deceit: “Nothing at all and I resent the question.” 

WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM YOU SNEK?! 

(in all honest probably nothing but what if) 

Important to note here that Roman instantly begins defending Patton from Deceit as soon as he accuses him of misleading Thomas. This goes to show just how much Roman views him as a villain. Or in other words: Patton, good. Deceit, bad. A viewpoint he continues to hold onto until the end of the episode, which also deserves it’s entire post because we all know how much turbulence that caused within the fandom. 

And to the observant eye, you’ll notice that the cane (or staff) Deceit uses is the same one that dragged Logan off screen. 

Frog puns. That is all.

I just, I love Deceit’s dialogue throughout this scene. It’s stuff I need to hear and tell myself on a regular basis. And I’d honestly rewatch this part (along with the rest of what Deceit and Logan say later on in the video) because it’s all something I need to also teach myself. But this ain’t meant to be a personal post so I’ll just move on. 

Deceit’s walk towards the camera. I don’t know why. It’s so smooth. He’s amazing. I love him. Snek… 

I have problems don’t @ me. 

Also no one is mentioning the reference to that one “Turn based rpg” short that Thomas made with his friends and I find that sad because it’s a neat and fitting reference given the theme of this video. Also earlier on when the trolley problem is first brought up all the people on the bottom track are Thomas’ friends. Another neat little detail, though sadly, their digital selves perished. 

PETER SINGER 

Logan doesn’t seem to like Deceit much, not outright hate him or anything, but it’s more like he just tolerates him but doesn’t seek to get on good terms with him. Which is a shame because as both parts of SVS have proven, these two have the capacity to work together. Which is why I hope Logan gets a debate episode with him as well because out of all the Sides, these two have interacted the least and that needs to be remedied (especially when they’re my two favorites) 

Deceit is trying to make Roman understand, but he’s so caught up in this black and white thinking that he disregards everything Deceit says! Why? Because the last time he tried to hear Deceit out he was reprimanded. (In other words, I relate to Roman so much in this that it hits a little too close to home and I’m definitely making a separate post about this. 

Deceit: *confused* Trees? And I’m so glad I found out I’m not the only dunce who thought Deceit’s name was going to be written on his hand… 

But seriously this whole moment, with the buildup, Deceit’s reluctance to share his name, the music, I’d put it up there with Virgil’s “I was one of them” for best Sanders Sides scenes.

Also, Deceit’s name is Janus! I was a little iffy about it at first, but since I didn’t ever really have a prediction for his name, I wasn’t disappointed and the name is growing on me. 

And then, the moment of trust is immediately ruined by Roman laughing. Dude, come on. (again though, post for another time because I understand where Roman is coming from here)

In all seriousness though I just love the last bits of this episode. The emotion, the angst, it doesn’t hold back and I appreciate the team taking things a step further than normal. Usually, moments like this are followed up by a joke to play it off, but they don’t do that after Roman sinks out. They stay in the moment until it’s had time to sink in. I wish the episode had ended a little more somberly, but I think this is a good step in the right direction. Showing that there won’t always be a 100% happy conclusion to things. Sometimes you need to take time in between to figure things out. 

This line: “Do you think there’s a limit to how many times someone can say sorry before you have to admit that they’re just bad for you?” This line is so important to me within the context of the episode and outside of it. I won’t get too personal but I will say that I was raised to believe that if a person wronged me in any way, that if they said sorry, I had to forgive them. Even if they did the same thing over and over and over again. As long as they apologize, you have to forgive them and move on. And that has messed me up in so many different ways, especially when those people are family. 

Janus sums it up best with “It depends” because yes, some people make the same mistakes again and again. But there’s a difference between someone trying to change and accidentally falling back on old habits, and someone taking advantage of your “forgiveness” that they continue to do those hurtful things because they know they can get away with it and not have to change. 

Also, while it’s totally fine for people to dislike Patton, I can’t understand how anyone could watch this episode and claim that he’s still the same as he was at the beginning of SVS Part One because he has changed. He has finally realized just how much he’s been hurting Thomas, and even Roman. He sinks out at the end to apologize to him, he recognizes his faults, and he’s seeking to make amends. He wants to do the right thing here, and keep in mind that recently a lot of his views (which are also Thomas’ views) have been flipped on their heads and they both need to rethink some things. It’s part of growing up and becoming your own person. 

I need to make a whole post about the more personal things that I got from the last three episodes (excluding Asides) because there’s just so many important things these episodes teach and I feel the need to address them. 

Also everyone sleeping on the fact that Leslie Odom Jr. just casually makes an appearance and attempts to start a pilot episode for his own series “Odom Sides” which I wish him luck on. He just wants to be in the room where it happens. 

Everything Patton did was for Thomas, so he wouldn’t be left in the dark again. He promised to keep fighting but ultimately, ended up fighting himself. Am I deep yet?

“Those imperfections don’t make you any less worthy of love” can you tell how much this episode means to me yet? 

Janus’ “I’ll take care of him.” Ack, he just cares so much… My gosh… Where did this character come from and what did he do with the slimy boi? (I mean that in two different ways)

Oh, there he is. That’s my boi. 

“There are smarter ways to get people to do what you want anyway.” “There are much less barbaric, much more fun, forms of sabotage.” 

Parallels? Maybe? What the heck I love Janus whether he’s encouraging Thomas to look after his mental health or plot his schemes in the shadows. Do I trust Janus? Oh heck no, of course not. There is something suspicious going on here and I both love it and hate it. More on that in a different post though.

“You’re not stuck with an evil snake boi. You’re just stuck with a snek boi.” 

Yes Thomas, continue to overthink every little issue until it results in a mental breakdown. Hm, sounds like what someone with anxiety does… I suppose that’s why this series exists. 

Okay call me a bad person but I almost always space out during Thomas’ messages to the viewers at the end of the videos. I don’t know why but I cannot focus on them to save my life and usually end up skipping past them to get to the end card. I dunno, maybe because it takes me out of the moment? Especially during episodes where they don't’ address the audience at all and then suddenly “Oh yeah! This is a Youtube series lol” it just feels out of place in more story driven episodes like this one. 

Okay am I the only one that’s kinda creeped out by Lee and Mary Lee? I dunno they just seem, off. Like if they were characters in a horror movie they’d be that overly nice couple that turn out to be the killers. Those are the vibes they give me. Maybe it’s because I have zero people skills due to being homeschooled all my life and the only social interaction I get is with coworkers so I dunno. They still creep me out. They creep me out more than Remus. And he legit freaked me out for a bit before he stole my heart. (I suppose this means I need to make a separate post about these two because I do have some opinions about whether or not it was a good idea to actually include them at the end. When I said I had too many thoughts about this episode I meant it)

And if the end card is any indication, I’m going to assume that the Sides are invisible to everyone except Thomas. Unless they’re just “observing” and not even Thomas can see them at this point, given he shows no indication of seeing or hearing them there. Maybe they get to choose when they’re visible? Or Thomas does? I dunno, the rules of this universe have never been clearly stated and are inconsistent. 

I didn’t expect Patton to be the first to accept Janus, and I’m kinda glad I was proven wrong. It does seem fitting with Patton’s growth and I liked their little moment at the end. 

And that wraps up my commentary. I hope you found something in this mess of, things. I plan to go more in depth with my separate posts which I’m going to have fun writing, so be on the lookout for those! 

Also at the time of writing this I now have 63 followers?! Thank y’all so much! I never thought this blog would get this far and I’m so glad it did because I’m having a lot of fun with it and hope to bring out more content regularly! Again, thank you!!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #303

“if i can’t be loved, then i’ll be hated”

What color are your glasses, if applicable? Black. Candy corn or conversation hearts? They're both gross, don't make me pick between garbage. Do you own a lot of earrings? Not really after I weeded them out before moving. What did your backpack in high school look like? I dare say I had the dopest backpack of them all. It looked like a massive Ouija board, and the zipper was the planchet (sp?). Have you ever been to a rave? Nah. What is your favorite art medium? I have a particular fondness of oil paintings. They tend to look so smooth, and you can achieve incredible realism with them. How far away is the nearest hospital from you? Not even five minutes, I think. Who was the last person you visited in a hospital? My mom. What is your favorite car color? Pink, duh. How did you learn to type? We actually had a class specifically for typing in middle school. What style of wedding dress do you want? I don't have that set in stone yet, but I really do love ballgown dresses with long trains as well as a-lines with a moderate train. I love a lot, except really for mermaid dresses. Do you fit into any stereotype, or are you non-stereotypical? I don't know if I fit perfectly into any and really don't care. Would you want your first child to have your hair color? ???? I don't care about their hair lol?????? It would depend on the hypothetical father, in which case I'd probably find it cute, but this is so, so unimportant. Do you enjoy writing in cursive? Yeah, it just feels good and flowy to me. What is your favorite hair color? Natural? Probably blonde with natural darker undertones throughout. I like blonde hair because it's far easier to dye, haha. Now, if we're including DYED hair, rose gold or pastel pink is *chefs kiss* What is your favorite eye color? Sapphire blue, probz. Would you put your birthday on a different day if you could? Nah, it's fine where it is. What holiday is your birthday closest to? Valentine's. Do you vent on social media a lot? NOOOOOOOO. I barely post ANYTHING about myself on social media because I feel like I'm being annoying, self-absorbed, find anything I do actually interesting, or don't want people to think I'm a whiner. All I ever really do on social media is share or reblog funny shit, things I love, stuff I find relatable or inspirational, educational, important for whatever reason, etc... Do you have abusive parents? I am very thankful to say no. Is your house haunted? Doesn't seem like it. What's your favorite thing to watch on YouTube? I'm in a real WoW-related phase lately... Watching my favorite streamers, gold farming guides, and other various aspects of the game. What are five health problems that you have? I talk about the mental issues enough, so I guess I'll talk about physical stuff here. Uhhh I have very low blood pressure (it's a med side effect), I have extremely weak legs following muscle atrophy, I have bad tremors, especially in my hands (amplified by medication once again), maybe TMI but we're adults here and it's a legit issue that I have chronic and severe conspitation, aaaand then of course I have hyperhidrosis (excessive sweating) to a fucking outrageous and also humiliating degree. Ooooonce again as a prescription side effect. This answer made meds sound kinda bad, I know, but really, I'd rather have the will to live and just have to deal with these than want to die everyday and not. Do you have surgery coming up? No, let's keep it that way until I lose enough weight and when I am 110% getting loose skin removal. Which family member(s) do you look the most like? My sisters, ig. People say my mom also, but I honestly don't see it. Have you ever cried while watching a YouTube video? Yeah, usually just in let's plays, but it's happened for other reasons. Are you missing a website that just shut down? Nah, none that I know of. NO. FUCKING WAIT. So, when my laptop was fixed, a LOT of shit was wiped from it, and that included all of my goddamn Lightroom editing presets. The site they were from no longer exists, so I had to use a different, pretty sub-par one to install at least a few because it helps me get a start on editing the photograph and leaning towards the "vibe" I want before spending like 15+ minutes tuning it myself. Would you be a barefoot bride? No. Which would you rather name your daughter: Eliana, Echo, Emerald, or Ellery? Ohhh, I like these. I think I prefer "Eliana," but "Echo" is a close second. "Ellery" is nice, but it sounds too much like "celery" to name my kid that lmao. Which would you rather name your son: Maverick, Matthew, or Moses? Ugh, none, honestly. But "Matthew" wins. When was the last time you gave a speech? Like a *legit" speech? Probably not since uhhh... I guess when I argued my disability case at court? Does that even count? Have you ever been in a stampede? Well, never seen this'n in a survey before, so good job, lol. No. If you were a fairy, what color would you like your wings to be? It would depend on what I wore, really. And my hair. But probably light pink. Would you rather name your son Storm, Skylar, Sorin, or Solomon? "Sorin." "Skylar" is SO Southern, and "Solomon" sounds like the creepy kid all his classmates avoid and I ain't putting my kid through that. Did you read a devotional this morning? Not my jam. Would you rather be named Arizona, Alaska, Cali, or Georgia? Hm... "Alaska" is actually kinda cool???? And I'm white as fuck so lol????? I wouldn't mind to nickname of "Ally," anyway. Are you repulsed by ugly reptiles? lololol bro get out Did all your friends know about your first crush or was it a secret? I was definitely secretive and shy about it when I first started getting crushes. Do you ever feel insecure about going out without makeup? I feel insecure either way, so... How many different natural hair colors are there in your immediate family? So, this is a hard question to answer. My mom was born with brown hair, but it darkened to almost black; only her daughter Katie inherited that. By some genetic magic, Dad had blond hair as a kid, but it also turned black. Like... how?????? I was born with dirty blonde hair like him, and mine turned an average brown with age. My immediate sisters have always had brown hair. What is your favorite online game? World of Warcraft is ballin'. Would you ever want to be famous and sign autographs? Ha, the idea of signing autographs is awful... I can't physically write very long without my carpal tunnel flaring up. Do you like your shirt to be loose or tight? LOOSE. Especially as a bigger person, tight shirts are just really uncomfortable. What is your favorite Spanish name? I don't know nearly enough to answer this. Would you rather visit Asia or Europe? I think Asia is, in general, more interesting and prettier as a whole, but I guess I'm drawn to European culture being more like my own and there are specific locations I'm interested in, like Germany or Scotland. So to answer the question, I guess Europe wins. Are there any Asians in your family? I don't believe so. Have you ever had colored braces? Haha yeah, I did that when I had them. Do you take birth control pills? Yes, just for period cramps. Without them, they can be immobilizing for me. If you live in the USA: do you feel free and safe? Ha, no. Well, not *entirely*. Have you ever been sick on your birthday? I was recovering from the stomach virus, if that counts. As in I still got sick the day before and felt iffy on my actual bday. 17th, I think? Is talking about your past painful for you? Yes. Are you a member of any support groups online? I'm a member of The Mighty site, if that counts. When I'm feeling very, very sound of mind and helpful without all the negativity being a detriment to myself, I do like going on there and trying to help or comfort people. Have you ever called a suicide hotline? Yes, and the line was busy, and that's when I decided I was a goner. Do you ever fantasize about revenge? I uhhhhh... sometimes. What's a movie you would recommend to someone who never watches movies? Ohhh, that's hard. I don't really watch movies either, and I'm trying to think of one that essentially anyone would like, so hm. Oh, Coco is absolutely a possibility. That movie touched me so, so deeply and is high on my favorites list. It's impossible to not feel the emotions. Do you want to have grandkids? Hell, I don't want kids. Do you want to be an aunt or uncle? I already am one, and I love being an aunt. Who was your favorite Spice Girl? I don't remember their names or characters in general. Did you make a lot of home videos growing up? I mean *I* didn't, but Mom filmed quite a few. Do you enjoy babysitting? NO. What's an unpopular opinion that you have? Avoiding some political ones, uhhhh. OH. HERE'S ONE. THE SCENE AESTHETIC IS FUCKING CUTE AND NOT CRINGEY AND YOU CAN FIGHT ME ABOUT IT. Are you attracted to the opposite gender, same gender, or both? Both are A+. Was your first crush on someone of the same gender or opposite? Opposite. As a kid, I didn't even fathom the concept that women could date women. What is something you'll never eat again? Why? Brussel sprouts. Fucking disgusting. What is currently happening that is scaring you? Besides the very obvious answer of "Covid," I worry about my mom a lot. She's so weakened after all the chemo and meds and can do literally less than I can without heavily breathing and sweating. I just worry a lot that cancer will return sooner than we hope; I don't want it to EVER come back, but doctors say it is very, very likely at one point or another because she was so very close to Stage 4. What would be your personal hell? Being completely and entirely isolated forever while somewhere hot and humid, lol. And play one of my trigger songs on repeat eternally. What made the "weird kid" at your school weird? There was this poor guy named Alfred that was VERY clearly depressed out of his mind, and I heard him speak maybe once through all of high school, and the entire class couldn't believe it. He always sat way in the back and never smiled. I wonder how he is nowadays. What is a word you personally find offensive? "Retarded" personally offends me the most when misused and spoken as an insult. What instantly puts you to sleep? Now that is HARD to do; I have a ridiculously hard time going to sleep. The easiest way though would probably be me being drained from an emotional breakdown. That is so exhausting that I'm capable of crashing pretty fast and hard. What song is in a language you don't speak, but you love it anyway? I adore Rammstein, so there's plenty. I'll probably say "Donaukinder" is their best. What is something you would like to do if you weren’t judged for doing it? I keep that I RP a complete secret in my "real" life for this reason unless it's like, pried out of me. What's a movie you think everyone should watch? Why that one? Johnny Got His Gun. See how goddamn disgusting war is. What was the most unexpected good thing that's ever happened to you? Ha, realizing I was bisexual after once being homophobic. What is the funniest fact you know? Oh man, I know a lot of random trivia shit, really, so it's hard to say. Maybe that quokkas throw their offspring at predators to distract and escape from them... As awful as that is, c'mon, you gotta admit it's funny and shocking with just how adorable they are. What was your 'mic drop' moment? Oh, I don't know. Possibly when I publicly came out as bi on Facebook and made it abundantly clear that I gave no shits about some homophobic friends and family & I was beyond willing to let anyone's ass go over it. What's the kindest way a stranger has treated you? I remember as a kid at McDonald's, the woman in front of our car paid for our food; apparently seeing a mom, dad, and three kids in a van was enough that she wanted to just be kind and give us a smile. We have no idea who she was, never saw her face or anything, she was just a sweet woman. What is the biggest design flaw of your body? Okay, I'm going to let go of all hatred for my body weight-wise and just think of this as from a strictly natural design perspective, in which case I'd say my toes are too small. What age are you afraid of turning and why? 30, because I'm terrified of getting there and seeing I've possibly gone nowhere. What is the strangest thing you have ever felt? I'm keeping this question in just because I think there could be some interesting answers for others, but I'm witholding my answer because nobody wants or needs to know lmao. What makes someone immediately unlikable? Acting better than others and belittling. Who's a villain you sympathize with and why? D A R K I P L I E R because of his origins and overall purpose and just simply existing. What is something you regret to NOT have done? I have this oddly weird regret of not going like, all-all the way with He Who Shall Not Be Named????? Idk why though????? Considering I loved him way too much and I was a reckless and impulsive person who probably at some point would have wound up accidentally pregs????? What a fuckin trip that woulda been. What movie changed your life for the better? None have really "changed my life." What book you think should be directed as a film? Oh, idk. Most I can think of have been. Of all the decades you've lived in, which one have you liked best? The 2000s, probably. A carefree kid. How are you doing today? I'm exhausted. While out with Mom and my sisters yesterday, we got behind a van whose driver was obviously drunk or high off his goddamn ass, and he was swerving EVERYWHERE, nearly shoving so many cars off the road. Mom called 911 to get in contact with highway patrol to report his dumb fucking ass in. I was having an absolute panic attack and cried quietly like the entire 45 or so minute drive home. I was just so, so upset because this is why I don't fucking drive, and I felt like I'd made my sister (who was driving) mad because she had to firmly tell me I had to calm down (I was hyperventilating and talking to myself to try to calm down) if she was going to focus and keep us safe. She later ensured me she wasn't mad, but I still wasn't the same the entire rest of the day. Anyway, I slept hard last night but had two nightmares, so I'm still really tired today. I'm trying to keep myself really distracted. What's something your relatives don't know about you? A whole lot really, considering beyond my very immediate family, I see almost nobody because they live many states away. What's something your parents did, which you have sworn never to do? Mom would spank us or slap an arm pretty hard if my sisters or I misbehaved or "disrespected" her by "talking back." I'm not having kids, but I would never, ever, ever, put my hands on them in any way that isn't loving. You do not teach children via inflicting fear. I also have this probably overly strong aversion to beer because that's what Dad always drank as an alcoholic. I'll probably never try it, not that I really want to because it smells awful. What's the most annoying thing your pet does? I feel like "annoying" is the wrong word for this, but Roman (my cat) can be incredibly demanding of attention and to lie on me when I'm on the laptop in bed, and sometimes I just want space and be able to clearly see the screen, haha. He will legit meow like a baby and gently swat my arm sometimes if I try to keep him back. Heeee usually gets his way. As for Venus (snek), she does nothing "annoying" either, but rather a bit concerning to a snake mom: she is usually very slow to find and strike her food. I feed her frozen/thawed mice, and she will first slither around her entire cage, tongue flicking and clearly looking for her food, even though I always place it atop the same spot on her hide, and she can have her head RIGHT beside it and still do nothing. She ultimately generally eats (as a ball python though, she's a picky eater and will occasionally reject a meal), but I of course wonder why she's odd about dinnertime... As a champagne, she does have the notorious "spider gene" in her, which can cause neurological issues, but idk if something like this could be related.