#I would die for Dolly Parton

[clexaweekofficial]

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: The 100 (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa Characters: Lexa (The 100), Clarke Griffin Additional Tags: Clexa Week 2023 (The 100), Secret Relationship Summary:

Clarke runs a brothel. Lexa is the local sheriff. Things are going well, until one Cage Wallace, shines the national spotlight on the small town. Remake of the Dolly Parton classic. Clexa week 2023, day 2, secret relationship.

[mrskywalkers-chanelboots]

i don’t know if y’all know but on spotify, there is a star wars profile and they have playlists mainly for characters or they’re like compilations of music from the games, battle scenes, etc etc HOWEVER the assortment of characters will never cease to amaze me like we got our besties kenobi, han solo, jyn erso (which is how i know these exist) BUT THEY DONT HAVE LUKE???? LIKE IM SORRY YOU HAVE A PLAYLIST FOR PALPATINE BUT NOT MY BOY????? FIRST OF ALL HE IS LITERALLY THE MAIN CHARACTER OF THE ORIGINAL TRILOGY SECOND OF ALL I SEE THE SHIT YOU PUT ON THESE PLAYLISTS I THINK YOU ARE JUST COWARDS BECAUSE YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU MAKE A LUKE PLAYLIST YOU WOULD HAVE TO PUT COUNTRY ON THERE AND NOT TO JUDGE BUT YALL DID PUT IM A BELIEVER BY THE FUCKING MONKEES ON OBI WAN’S PLAYLIST YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO NOT MAKE A COUNTRY LUKE PLAYLIST FORCE HAVE MERCY

[pup-has-rabies]

DOLLY PARTON ROCK ALBUM 😩💕

[icarusredwings]

Things in the X-Men community that the Fandom has dubbed canon:

Charles is an alchoolic like his step father and he hates himself for it.

Wade has tummy issues and is actually smart.

Logan has food problems and eats too fast

Erik makes shit float when he makes out with Charles

Pietro speaks really fast and people see it as rude rather then understanding his point of view.

Colossus is a massive sweetheart who will paint you pictures or bake muffins.

Wanda and Jean would be amazing friends (AND SHOULD HAVE BEEN SISTERS)

Scott wants so desperately to not be a boyscout but it's the role hes been given and he can't seem to break out of charater.

Logan plays Scotty dosn't know on repeat outside Scotts room when hes pissed at him. It gives him anxiety every time.

Ororo knows how to cook large amounts of food and is very loving of children but has a temper. She is the scary auntie that you love when you grow up because of how strict she is.

Jubilee once had to cut gum out of her hair

Rouge sounds like dolly parton but will deny it

Jean is the top.

Gambits messed up grammer is adorable, and his food is to die for.

Erik is emotional over the holidays because often times he's alone, envious of the big family that charles has- without him.

Beast sheds way too much and its very annyoing.

Kitty definitely has a "vintage" "jazasize" outfit, complete with leg warmers.

Morph is very insecure and often has social anxiety to the point they wont speak if theres a lot of people around.

Kurt hands from chandeliers for no reason

If Logan comes to ask bobby to make his beer cold one more time hes going to freeze them on purpose.

Ororo sees Kurt like a younger brother

I dont care that kurts lived in america for 3 or 13 years he will never say Wolverine properly.

Spyke is a bit of trouble, but he's a good kid. A kid who just wants to prove he's worth something.

Yukio likes miku

Negasonic secretly loves everyone around her

The mansion has blown up 17 trillion times.

Everyone has nightmares 24/7 and at least one person is screaming at night.

Logan gets passed around like communal pasta salad

[cuntydreamgirl]

short n sweet review

(don't shit on me)

LOVE LOVE LOVE short n sweet wins #1 for the cuntiest most unhinged lyrics. basically sabrina carpenter is the dreamiest girl with the dreamiest voice.

here's my perfect ranking (excluding espresso and please please please):

sharpest tool | where's the hype for the best track on short n sweet? it's not being talked about enough BUT that's fine, i'll gatekeep. anyway, you're so hot and perfect if this is your #1. hear me out, it's very maisie x harry, it's bugging me that i can't pinpoint how but it just makes sense somehow. intro is heavenly, chorus is gorgeous, just perfect.

juno | pop fucking perfection. so close to replicating the serotonin I get from listening to guilty as sin? which says a lot because i am still addicted to that song. literally to die for, sabrina outdid herself with this one

lie to girls | sister to boyfriends by harry styles iykyk. self-explanatory. LOOOOOOOOVE

bed chem | "where art thou? why not uponeth me?" was all I needed to hear for this to be top 5. it's hot, flirty, and fun

slim pickins | okay dolly parton!!! she sounds insane!!! relate too this one too hard & it's not fair

don't smile | she's so petty and i love her for it. scrumptious track. i know i'll be ranking this one higher eventually. 100% sure it's going to be one of the most underrated songs of the album

dumb & poetic | short n sweet literally. should've been longer and vocals like honey. we needed more songs like this one!!!!

good graces | very ariana grande

coincidence | lyrics are so funny and clever

taste | ....mv makes it 100000/10 because they're both perfect gorgeous stunning and i do like it but it's just not a song i'd play on my own

overall i'm obsessed, infinite gold stars for how witty and fun she is. i don't know how to describe it other than that it's the perfect getting ready album. very high energy and girly. just imagine doing your makeup and hair while blasting this (unreal). BUT BUT BUT i won't lie, other than my top 3, i wouldn't really seek out any of these songs to replay over and over yk. i really REALLY wish we got more ballads and songs that showed just how powerful her vocals really are. and even though i know i wasn't wow'ed by most songs, i know they'd all be 10/10 live because she's an insane performer and the atmosphere would be dreamlike (kind of like tpwk by harry, i never ever ever play that song but live it was probably one of my favorites because of the energy). anyway don't come for me, i really do like it. I can't wait to listen to it as I walk through campus

[legoflowrs]

HII i was wondering if you could do some hcs like you did for Kyle and Kenny but with Craig?? No pressure ofc! 💗

HEADCANNONS

cw: drug use, drinking, smoking, slight nsfw

AGED UP TO 18 PEOPLE

a/n: hiya! so in the head cannons craig is with tweek but obviously in the relationship ones he’s with reader xx

i’m also in my craig era rn! hope u like this anon <3

Craig Tucker

- I’m a firm believer in Peruvian Craig!

- He was adopted by Laura and Thomas but Tricia is their biological child.

- Struggled a lot with identity issues when growing up because he didn’t know much about his birth family.

- Laura being the angel she is worked extra hard to make sure Craig was in touch with his birth culture. Took him to a lot of events and tried to cook the food to the best of her ability.

- Out of all the families in South Park I think the Tucker family is the healthiest.

- Craig decided to not put a label on his sexuality. He just wants to go with the flow and see where life takes him.

- That being said it took a long time for him to accept he was attracted to guys. He had a lot of internalised homophobia because of the culture in South Park.

- He was petrified when he realised he had feelings for Tweek.

- I think his family were his rock during this time.

- Still flips everyone off. He thinks it’s peak humour (dumbass).

- Plays football 100%

- Dies when he sees that Tweek is cheering for him on the sidelines.

- Has a touch of the tism (lol).

- I think he really struggles to verbalise his emotions so he sticks to physical touch and acts of service.

- I think he’d probably also plays violin he finds it super calming.

- Listens to R&B.

- Goes to the gym a lot it relieves his stress.

- Goes for runs when he can’t go to the gym.

- Gets a job at Tweek bros and all the grandmas love him.

- Tea drinker!! His favourite is chamomile and honey.

- Tries to do some boxing with Tweek. Gets beat up by Tweek.

- Plays Roblox religiously.

- Likes cooking but hates baking.

- Wears slippers in the house like a little meemaw.

- I think he’d sell vapes on the dl lmao.

- HATES school dances but his friends force him to go anyway.

- Might not act like it but would die for his friends, he has a super soft spot for Clyde. They have been bestfriends for years.

- I head cannon he would become a firefighter lol (i have a fic idea in my head like firefighter!craig and paramedic!reader lol).

- Is still super obsessed with astronomy.

- But absolutely hates astrology he thinks it’s so dumb.

- Will go to the planetarium very often.

- Still wears his hat all the time. But in high school learnt to style his hair so started wearing it less often.

- Smokes weed with Kenny.

- Takes his alcohol well but gets super clingy when he’s drunk.

- He would say he hates parties but somehow is always at them.

- He HATES reading.

- Prob had to be tutored by Kyle during high school.

- Kenny pierced his nose.

- Has a good relationship with Tricia even though they bicker a lot. He takes her for ice cream.

- Loves kids but they find him intimidating lol.

- Is really good at calming babies down (meow).

- Royal blue is his favourite colour.

- Got into the bad habit of smoking cigarettes after having a fight with Tweek.

- Would have sleepovers with Tweek often. They make breakfast together 🥹

- He starts doing media in high school and buys a video camera. Makes little montages of his family and friends. Probably makes them for his friends birthdays as well. (this head cannon is inspired by the fic “ladies and gentlemen we are now floating in space” on ao3, go read it bc it changed my life).

- Plays chess.

- Listens to classical music.

- Likes hiking and discovering new trails.

- Guilty pleasure is Dolly Parton!!!!

- Avid milk drinker makes fun of others for drinking alternative milks.

- Grows flowers and gives them to Tweek. It takes ages cause he always forgets and they end up dying.

- Only drinks room temperature water.

- He has so many tattoos that Tweek designed (my head cannon is that Tweek is really good at art).

- Fucker is tall. 6’2!!!

- Is pretty defined from all the physical activity he does.

- When he’s older he rides a motorcycle.

- Exclusively wears converse. All his friends draw and write on them.

Craig in a relationship

- Okay let’s get down to business hehehe.

- Once again my major head cannon is firefighter!craig and paramedic!reader.

- He is super affectionate with you because that’s how he verbalises his love for you.

- Will do little things for you like tie your shoes or refill your water bottle without you asking.

- Absolutely froths when you wear his letterman jacket.

- He loves linking pinkies with you.

- He has a polaroid of y’all in his phone case.

- You guys have sleepovers often!

- You, him and Tweek go on day trips together.

- He’s not the best at consoling you when you’re upset but he really tries

- Y’all play Roblox together.

- He sends you gym gain updates (meow).

- Loves when your head is on his chest, he strokes your hair.

- Y’all always share headphones whenever you go anywhere.

- You are his passenger princess!!!

- He’s pretty experienced with sex. Loves making you feel good!

- Will hold your hand during sex he finds it super intimate.

- Is super insecure that you’ll leave him for someone who’s better at dealing with their emotions.

- I think he might have a tendency to blow up during arguments. He kinda shoves his feelings down so it all comes out during arguments.

- Goes for a run after y’all fight.

- Also head cannon that he will be super protective over you if you’re pregnant 🥹

- Would love to have a mini version of you guys running around.

- Likes to stargaze with you in the back of his truck.

- Y’all go camping together and roast s’mores on the fire.

- You beg him to go midnight swimming. He caves cause he can’t say no to you.

- Bends down to give you kisses.

- Loves holding your waist or hips.

- Holds your face in both his hands and gives you tender kisses on your nose.

- Will literally body slam you on the mattress cause he thinks it’s hilarious.

- You guys and Tweek have movie nights super often.

- When he falls in love he’s in deep.

- Will propose to you under the stars.

- Makes a video of all your friends saying happy birthday and a heartfelt message from him. Makes you cry for hours.

- Will pick you up when he hugs you.

- You braid Tricia’s hair and go get your nails done together.

- His parents adore you. Laura is a second mum to you.

- All in all Craig is super in love with you 10/10 boyfriend.

[poco-lovers]

HI YES I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR HEADCANONS 💛 !!! :DD <- Also a person who makes Headcanons

OKAY SO THREE PEOPLE ASKED FOR THEM AND I SHOULDVE ASKED IF ANYONE WANTED TO HEAR SPECIFIC ONES BUT ILL START WITH THE MAIN TWO YOU PROBABLY CAME HERE FOR

Edgar first! 🧣

He’s convinced himself his clear social anxiety is just another piece of evidence he’s cool and mysterious. He is not.

Edgar tried to vape once and coughed so hard his mom thought he was sick and took him to a doctor

He has an extreme amount of makeup knowledge and knew all the makeup guru drama, he was there when James Charles was outted

Has a hard time expressing himself truthfully because of his lack of social skills

Edgar’s scarf is an extension of his body but the scarf lacks a lot of his thought filters so it tends to act out how he feels or grabs for things he wants. It’s gotten him in trouble and embarrassed him, but is oddly good for complicated dance moves

Says he likes horror a lot but gore makes him feel queasy. He just thugs it out

He wants to come off as a scary guy but he just has slight anger issues and gets irritated easily

Edgar has tried (emphasis on TRIED) to learn some Spanish music for Poco. The best he’s gotten is La Cucaracha and Feliz Navidad, which is impressive given he failed Spanish 1 twice

He’s got a jealousy problem because Edgar thinks others offer more than he could and his few real friends might not want to stick around when they realize

Edgar’s outfits leave him overheating in the summer and cold in the winter

He really does love his mom, she’s his only direct family

Definitely had a demon/wolf/dragon fursona in middle school

Has Pop Drop Candy on multiple of his playlists

Poco second! 🎸

Poco started learning guitar when he was 4 with his dad, although his parents weren’t mariachis

Has an absolutely huge extended family and each of them know a different instrument. Family reunions are both crowded and loud. At some point everyone shows off their best song they know how to play, and if everyone goes one after another this can last over an hour

A band kid, went to band camp, but refuses to tell anyone anything about what went down there

He can’t technically sleep anymore as a skeleton, and gets really lonely during the nights. He misses being able to dream and turn his brain completely off, although he’s learned how to rest

Poco’s family are all humans, he died when he was 15 and miraculously came back after being buried next to Star Park

He’s mostly lost his sense of touch, and can’t feel things like heat or cold at all

A die hard optimist through and through

Says country music “isn’t that bad you guys, Dolly Parton is a national treasure��

Claims dying was actually a good thing because now he doesn’t have to deal with allergies anymore

Has a habit of being overly friendly with people at his concerts, which can sometimes cause hurt feelings because someone might think he’s trying to flirt when he’s not, or that he’s leaving his established friend group for a stranger

Poco is absolutely terrible at picking up on social queues

Let me know if you guys wanna see more and of who!! Also share any HCs with me and I might draw them! Doesn’t have to be either of these two nerds :3 I’m in a drawing mood heh!

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

hi hello hi

i love ur headcanons, they're the most canon headcanons i've ever read 🫣..

was just wondering if you could write some about what you think the mercs favourite bands/musical artists would be 👁️

What Are The TF2 Mercs Favorite Bands/Music Artists?

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Awe tysm! Of course, I can, I love writing about music 😭 I had to delve into the depths of my Spotify to actually see what bands I know, that I should pick for these guys. This totally isn't me projecting btw.

I ended up just giving them a band they like and a singular musical artist.

(I've been forgetting to specify or elaborate on this, most of the time, unless mentioned, these silly's are in present day and not like the 60s lmao.)

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SPOILERS FOR THE BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY MOVIE! (Also a little angsty, sorry <3)

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Demo and Hozier oh my god, its insane how much he likes him. I don't know how to elaborate on this further, but like, "Would That I"??? I feel like he loves that song! Also, I feel like all I have to say is "Take Me To Church" and I know some people will understand that immediately. This man just uses music as escapism, of course he likes Hozier.

Will Wood and The Tapeworms is a band that I've already deemed one of Demo favorites because of "The First Step." but this man just genuinely loves all of the songs. "The First Step", "Front Street", "6up 5oh Copout (Pro/Con)" and "Hand Me My Shovel, I'm Going In!" Are his favorites though.

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Engie is a hardcore Dolly Parton fan. I know it's played out, I know it's obvious, I know its tropey, but I can't deny that this man loves Dolly Parton. Like this man is head of the fan club and I won't stop saying it. It would be wrong for me to pretend he doesn't heavily relate to "9 to 5."

Also loves the Chordettes oddly enough? He thinks all the way they sing is beautiful. He adores the cover of "Hello! Ma Baby". But is also a sucker for the popular ones, "Mr. Sandman" and "Lollipop". I will say though, it's utterly disturbing to the other mercs when it's like midnight and they get up for something and just here a really softly played "Mr. Sandman". Only one not disturbed is Medic, but like, it's hard to disturb a man who also has been known to play those old eerie songs at odd hours, they bond over this.

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This man loves Elton John, he loves how he can relate heavily to some of the songs and then just genuinely enjoy other ones with no other meaning. Like he'll listen to "I'm Still Standing", and feel a lot of emotions from it, and then like "Crocodile Rock" will come on and just vibe to it.

Heavy also likes the Beetles. I don't know I just think he likes way the songs are sung, and the meaning he pulls from the lyrics themselves. Reads into music a lot and values being able to do that. Likes songs about love, and the Beetles are great for that. Don't get him started on "I Want To Hold Your Hand", and "Eleanor Rigby".

(Uh did I make this man have kind of old man music taste? Yes. Am I wrong, and will I apologize? No. He is old!) (Affectionate)

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MARINA being Medics favorite is a mix of him being a teen girl in my mind, and an actual genuine ability to relate to some of the songs. I will say this until the day I die. This man has never felt good enough. Not even once. He's always working to try and get better, and once he does get better he's moving the goal post of getting better. Has played "Are You Satisfied" more times than you can count. "Oh No" and "Hermit The Frog" are also one's he finds himself both loving and relating to.

Would you guys be mad if I said this man was obsessed with Queen? (I am not projecting here, I swear!) Similarly to Heavy, he's a sucker for a romantic song or two. Loves "Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy" Also you want to talk about not feeling good enough, loops "Bohemian Rhapsody" Have you guys seen the Bohemian Rhapsody movie? You guys know the scene where Freddie (Rami Malek) is singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" and sings the line "I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all!" and has a slight break because he realizes he just actually said that? Yeah. That's how Medic feels when he first hears the song. But on a lighter note he also likes "Killer Queen" and "I Want To Break Free."

(Went crazy on this one, I really just need to make an entire breakdown on Medic one of these days 😭)

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Scout is a Tom Cardy fan. I don't know how to elaborate without just yelling "Mixed Messages" like come on. Also, have you guys heard "H.S" Man he loves that song! Also oops another mini headcanon inside a headcanon, Sniper introduced him to Tom Cardy when he had "Read Between The Lines" playing one day.

Mindless Self Indulgence is a tad self-explanatory but who am I not to explain something in graphic detail? Gives him such confidence and makes him feel so cool. I already headcanon that he loves "Get It Up" so it's only natural that his favorite band made a song he loves. I stand by what others have said. Trans boy swag, well also a mix of that and white boy swag. White trans boy swag makes a Mindless Self Indulgence fan.

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Sniper- Honestly? I racked my brain for this one, and I'm going to get silly with this. I'm going to say he likes George Ezra, purely because "Budapest" reminds me so much of him. I think he'd love that song. Another case of putting his emotions into his music or more like, liking music that conveys his emotions? Ough the song just gives me Sniper angst vibes.

Uh controversial opinion, what the frick??? Oingo Boingo fan. Again something I can't but he loved "Dead Man's Party" It's just a song he's always really liked. "No Spill Blood" and "Controller" are also ones he likes. I feel like "weird" music is his favorite genre of music.

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I hate to say it but Spy is a fan of Olivia Rodrigo. I'm not going to lie, he's the second most teen girl-coded person on the team. Sings "bad idea right?", "Brutal", and "good 4 you". Sings them in the shower, the other mercs are sick of it 😭

Is it too much to say Mother Mother for the fact that I love Spy angst and can see him crying over "Arms Tonite" and relating to "Verbatim" so hard it's insane? Ugh, I live for Spy angst. I want him to be happy too but it's so easy to put angst😭. (Also I can't stress how much "Wrecking Ball"

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Soldier is a sucker for AC/DC. Dad music (I say this with love, I get why people like AC/DC they have good music.)This man is just a criminally insane dad, in my mind anyway. The other mercs have been woken up to "Highway to Hell" once or twice and have let Soldier play "Thunderstruck" as hype music before a battle.

I think he likes Tom Petty, like how are you going to tell me he doesn't love "I Won't Back Down" and "Free Falling" just loves the sound of the music itself (if that makes any sense) more focused on the sounds instead of the actual meaning.

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Pyro is a huge fan of Jack Stauber. They adore the music. Enjoys the pop of "There's Something Happening" and loves the slow and sad sounds in "Cupid" Ugh they just love Jack Stauber so much. The only issue they had was when they first listened to "Bumblebees Are Out" it caused a meltdown, poor Pyro was reminded of trauma they forgot. Engie had to calm them down for an hour after. (They're okay, don't worry!)

PYRO IS A JUGGALO 100% I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. They kick their legs while listening to "Imma Kill U". Listen to "My Axe" and replace any mention of an axe with their flamethrower, in their head. I'm just imagining an AMV or just seeing Pyro walking to "Boogie Woogie Wu" and scaring the shit out of anyone and everyone.

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I finally finished it 😭 I had like five asks? All at the same-ish time and I was so hyped but then my brain decided to revoke all my motivation. It's okay though I just pushed through it. I love being able to answer asks!

An ask about about Medic and Junji Ito's Gyo coming tomorrow hopefully!

[steviewashere]

I am a simple woman (gn). WIP title game picks!

heheheheheheheheheheheheheheh (explicit)

and

Idk steddie

😂

I am going to be completely honest with you, I don't remember any of what I've already shared on these two. And, another thing I'm being honest about, I'm too lazy to go searching for the snippets. So...if these snippets look familiar, sorry.

hehehe (explicit)

It’s dark downstairs, is the first thing he notices. He thought maybe Steve would be getting the television turned on, maybe be making some popcorn in the kitchen, hell—Eddie thought that maybe Steve would be exiting the downstairs bathroom with that stupid phrase he always points at their friends: “Woo…do not go in there.” It gets under his skin, but even Eddie would be a fool to not admit that Steve being a dork like that is cute—even as gross as the visual is. Eddie walks deeper into the house, plopping his bag on a kitchen counter, peeking around corners to see where Steve may be, if he’s even home. But then he hears it. A muffled, tired groan coming from upstairs. It’s distant and deep, barely making it down the stairs, but Eddie still hears it. He doesn’t even think to consider what it could be, he’s not going to wait around to find out what the hell is wrong with Steve. He takes the steps two at a time, jumping on and creaking each stair. Walks in haste to Steve’s bedroom, to where the distressed? noises are coming from. Opens the door in one wide motion, only to find a scene he…never expected.

idk steddie

Maybe she was a secret metalhead—would she have snapped out of that Vecna shit if he had played a Black Sabbath tape? Or maybe she enjoyed something like Dolly Parton. There was the chance she was into Kate Bush, to that he could’ve asked Max for something—maybe, but the situation already seemed too dire to just leave for even a split second. Hell, if he had known the ultimate outcome, what was actually going on, he’d jump right onto the radio and tune up whatever station she needed—be it top 40s or the likes. Would she still have died? Was it happenstance? Maybe he was just unlucky—curse the name, the family. Or what if she just knew…what if she needed a more homely place to die?

[welcome-to-ratterrock]

i wonder what music artists they would listen to!

i know DAMN well that Sorcha would listen to Lana del ray, Saorise would listen to chapell roan and i think that Rilla would listen to Laufey

GOODNESS, this took a while. Both Baji and I are ardent music lovers and aficionados, so music is veryimportant to us and to this story and these characters. So I wanted to make sure I got everything in order before answering these asks! 

Sorcha loves jazz and music that’s heavily influenced by soul and movement, so she loves hip-hop, pop soul, R&B, club music - stuff that’s sexy and feminine and full of confidence, like Janelle Monae, Rihanna, Beyoncé, HER, Doja Cat, Billie Eilish. 

She’s absolutely a Lana Del Rey fan, also loves Amy Winehouse, Paloma Faith, Clairy Browne, April Smith and the Great Picture Show, Laura Mvula. For more old school stuff she goes for Irma Thomas, Nina Simone, Peggy Lee, Julie London. 

Rilla loves fun energetic pop that she can dance to but also makes her feel free to - Kesha (the Rainbow album was DEEPLY important to her), Doja Cat, Dimie Cat, Sabrina Carpenter, Chapelle Roan, Olivia Rodrigo, Brittany Spears. She loves Laufey for a softer, romantic vibe, and even though she doesn’t listen to a ton of alternative she LOVES Molotov Jukebox. 

Also, girl ADORES Dolly Parton. She’s dressed up as her for Halloween, loves her endlessly. She got into Kacey Musgraves too, but Dolly has her heart. She likes some of Taylor Swift’s stuff, but she’s definitely not a die hard Swiftie. 

Lorcan unironically adores Kesha, very happy to jam with Rilla whenever their girlie’s music is on. In general he loves music that would be perfect for a barroom brawl - Dropkick Murphys, Flogging Molly, IDLES. Loves rock in general, especially Def Leppard and AC/DC, the Clash and the Black Keys. Likes Gaelic Storm and the Beatles for softer moods. 

Brig listens to a lot of metal and punk and rock music - she and Lorcan would definitely jam to AC/DC and the Black Keys. Also loves blues music, definitely a fan of Johnny Cash. Also likes Gin Wigmore a lot. 

Luella loves soft indie core songs and groups - the Wailin’ Jennys, the Oh Hellos, the Crane Wives, the Jane Austen Argument, the Hush Sound, Brandi Carlisle, Cat Power, Paris Paloma. She and Rilla both love Laufey. She listens to Florence + the Machine and P!nk when she wants to feel empowered. 

Locke is also into soft indie, lots of underground bands no one has ever heard of but have very intense poetic lyrics - Hozier, the National, Cigarettes After Sex, Florence + the Machine, Nicole Dollanganger, the Oh Hellos. There’s a lot of overlap between him and Lu, actually! He also loves viola music, he plays it and it’s a very healing, therapeutic passion of his. 

Regal…whoo boy, his taste in music covers such a wide and diverse spectrum. He loves operas and classic musicals, very much a devotee to classical music by artists like Debussy and Puccini and Bizet. One of his absolute favorite songs is “Danse Macabre”…

He’s a virtuoso with the piano and has described himself as his own favorite musician. 

But he does like some more modern music, he’s just VERY snobby about what he wants to listen to. Marina and the Diamonds (“Bubblegum Bitch” is a favorite), Queen (he is very fond of Freddy), Voltaire, Fish in a Birdcage, the Real Tuesday Weld are some examples.  

Bogdan is even more a snob than Regal, and stays away from most modern music. He’d much rather focus on composing his own music than polluting his ears with the dreck that passes for songs nowadays. Sorcha has her work cut out with him, but she’s more than up to the task…

Casimir, sadly, probably doesn’t listen to a lot of music because of his injury - it’s too much stimulation and he suffers from horrible headaches to begin with. Not all music does it, but too much stress and sounds would very likely trigger an episode. It’s incredibly tragic because music is such an important and treasured facet of his and Bogdan’s culture…

[todayisyourturntolose]

Share pdude hcs??? 😈

ok soooo. idk if you mean one pdude in particular sooo imma do the basic ones! (p1,p2,p3,p4)

good lord it has been forever since ive been able to write down my hcs for these sillies, and i have a whole bunch so i'll put it under le cut :)

p1

-well versed in ASL, uses it in overwhelming situations

-sunglasses double as prescription lenses (i give this hc to basically all of the other dudes, but i think p1 would need glasses more than any of them)

-probably the smartest of the other dudes. essentially a polymath. if you ask him a question about almost anything, he'd probably give you a reasonable answer

-surprisingly good at drawing. does better with drawing portraits rather than full body. has a very scratchy and rough looking art style

-(technically canon bcuz of like, the war journal) writes in a journal (essentially a diary, but he'd rather die than call it that), mainly writes about his emotions and internal struggles, but sometimes writes about the other dudes and his experiences with them

-cannot go to sleep in silence. he's gotta have music on or some sort of background noise or else his mind starts to wander

p2

-physically can't stay in one place without moving. whether it be rocking in place, tapping his foot, or shifting his weight from one foot to the other, he's always making some sort of movement.

-actually pretty friendly to those around him. he just has a pretty short temper, getting easily agitated by things (or people) around him

-besides p1, probably the skinniest of all the dudes. mans is all bones compared to say p4 or p3

-champ is his emotional support animal. he's been through a lot, and champ is basically his only refresher from the hell he lives in

-strangely flexible...can slip through fairly small cracks and corners easily

-has a LOT of vocal stims. this mf meows whenever he sees a cat. he makes random noises to himself. he repeats things that he hears others say

p3

-got a surprisingly good amount of muscle on him. goes to the gym pretty often. definitely flexes whenever he gets the chance

-slight southern accent. very noticeable when he gets angry or when he talks fast. if you point it out to him, he'd probably get really embarrassed

-average r&b enjoyer. out of the blue, p1 once asked who luther vandross was, to which p3 gave an almost hour long lecture about the importance of r&b and why it's one of the best genres to date, why old r&b is miles better than new r&b, quizzing p1 on different artists, etc

-also an unironic country music enjoyer. he begs and pleads the other dudes to let him play just a little bit of johnny cash whenever he's offered the aux cord. maybe a bit of dolly parton. hell, probably some shania twain, if he's feeling bold.

-a fairly good singer. he's no freddie mercury, but to say he's horrible would be an overstatement. knows what songs are in his range, and which ones aren't. isn't really one to sing out loud in front of a lot of people, though. (one time, he sang to p1 in an attempt to calm him down during one of his moments. it worked, surprisingly :0)

p4

-one of the happiest dudes. at this point in his life, he's not nearly as violent as the others (he still has his moments, of course, but he's not one to just spontaneously go ham) and just sorta accepts things as they are

-a genre GOD. this man listens to pretty much everything. his favorite genres are funk, nu-metal (or metal in general), pop, and r&b (he and p3 bond over their fav artists)

-while champ is basically an emotional support animal to p2, to p4, champ is more of a service dog. he's getting older, which means he isn't able to do things as easily as he used to, so champ is there to fetch things for him and in general, just help him with daily tasks

-very confident with who he is. he isn't embarrassed by the things he does. he takes pride in being different.

-doesn't give himself labels when it comes to sexuality or gender. it's not that he's against it, he just prefers the idea of being unlabeled. (though, i personally hc him as being pansexual and transmasc. you go grandpa.)

-DAD BOD. a fair bita muscle, though. he's pretty strong compared to the other dudes.

-has an array of random talents. one day he'll just start juggling randomly and be like "oh, this? yeah, i picked it up a few years ago. nothing to write home about, to be honest."

--

aaaaand that's all! sorry if it's a lot, i just rlly have a lot to say abt these goobers (and even more to say abt the dudes i didn't include!)

[sadnessisavegetable]

"Good morning, Cybertron and Earth!"

A cheerful voice happily chirped through the radio after a calm piece of music concluded.

Shockwave startled, nearly slamming his hand in the fume hood door as he eased it partially shut so he could safely experiment.

The voice continued through news that didn't match what was happening in their reality, illustrating the losses of the Decepticons and Autobots as an update to a war that no longer continued.

Shockwave paused, trying to make sense of the recognition he felt for the voice as he stared at the radio he'd gotten in memory to Soundwave after he was sucked into the in-between world.

"So, that's our quick update! Still no sign of Megatron, which is irritating Mr. Pax, it seems. He's been on a bit of a...er...rampage. Getting uncomfortably close to the station."

Laserbeak seemed to recognize the voice and seemed taken aback as he landed on Shockwave's shoulder. Shockwave looked at the flight-based minicon carefully.

"That can't be...that's not Soundwave. Is it?" Laserbeak asked softly.

"Soundwave doesn't have that cadence to his voice. Impossible. Or at least very unlikely." Shockwave tried to dismiss what Laserbeak said, but he couldn't fully remove the thought.

"I'm Soundwave, and you're listening to Decepticon Radio!"

No...it couldn't have been. Shouldn't have been.

Shockwave's helm fins splayed a bit as he tried to make sense of it, his systems nearly shutting down as he tried repeatedly. Pleasant, happy Cyber-pop resonated through the room—the piece playing evidently a cover of Nine to Five by Dolly Parton, an Earth song.

Shockwave leaned heavily on a nearby counter as his system finally restarted its thinking functions to prevent him from grasping at straws that weren't there. He was aware of it, managing to hold onto the memories.

Shockwave decided he would have to listen to the radio a little closer to uncover the mystery.

---

Soundwave was happily bopping around his station, listening to the music as it was played, but keeping an eye on Orion Pax the whole time.

Orion was dangerous at this point, so he kept his minicons safely inside. They picked music and received updates from the sources of news the radio relied on.

Rumble happily put some metal music on the queue, spacing tamer pieces between each song. Frenzy wrote up the news bullet points for Soundwave to read off. Buzzsaw monitored what he could while Laserbeak slept beside him. Ravage was guarding the front door.

"Good work, kids! Maybe we'll get some rust sticks when we're done." Soundwave hummed a bit, thinking about the snack. Rumble seemed overjoyed at the idea, stimming beside Soundwave as he showed him the queue.

"Is this good, boss?" Rumble asked eagerly. Soundwave looked at the queue with a smile.

"Very good, Rumble! I'm glad you guys are learning how to do this stuff, as sucky it is that we have to do it while someone is throwing a hissy fit outside." Soundwave praised them, lifting Rumble up and putting him on his shoulder.

---

Soundwave huffed as he adjusted his body in the nook he'd finally found. Dreadwing's dead, zombified body paced around just outside the nook and Soundwave's eyes went wide as he smashed himself back further.

I hate it here, I hate this zombie, I hate not being able to communicate with anyone I care about. But by Primus, I will not die here at the hands of one of Unicron's mindless drones. Soundwave thought firmly before starting to silently pray once more.

Dreadwing grumbled outside before eventually moving on. Soundwave let out the softest sigh he could manage before clambering out of the nook and climbing up the cliff face as carefully as he could.

He ran. It was the first time in many years that he'd outright ran. He ran across the top of the cliff, knowing that most servants of Unicron struggled with transforming.

He thought back to the Nemesis. How he wished he stayed onboard and just let himself be in the in-between instead of trying to figure out a way away.

Soundwave finally stopped when he reached town. He was invisible to them and couldn't interact with the walls in any meaningful way. But he could watch them.

Apparently, he wasn't the only one there and observing either though. A figure that looked vaguely human, but like a titan demon also stared back at him with burning green eyes.

"Are you here too?" They asked softly. Soundwave slowly nodded. "I'm Fate. A minor god of Cybertronian descent. I appear like this because I affect humans too. I don't remember getting here, but...every now and then I feel around me this pair of terrifying...presences."

Soundwave slowly nodded. "Me too. Have any idea what they are?"

"Well...there's the possibility that it's the pair of immortals within the core of the Earth."

"There's two?"

"Yes. Unicron himself and his creation, Thunderwing. Though, I'm glad they're the worst thing we face here. There are several zombies that are starting to regain consciousness in their sparks, and at worst, they're confused." Fate laughed softly.

Soundwave eventually sank down next to them. "Who are they?"

"Oh...Breakdown, Cliffjumper,...and Dreadwing. Tailgate sometimes shows up with Cyclonus, though they barely count as zombies. And then there's the drifter. He's not quite in the in-between or in reality. He's been modified heavily by Unicron, but he's still fully conscious."

---

"Alright. Send to Soundwave, I guess." Shockwave prompted Laserbeak. Laserbeak used his bond with Soundwave.

Soundwave? Laserbeak asked. Relief poured through their bond, prompting him to continue. Hi. Shockwave was asking if you managed to end up in an entirely different dimension and opened a radio station.

Laserbeak was met with confusion and he reeled back, concerned.

"He doesn't have a radio station. He doesn't know what you're talking about. So either this station is done by an identity thief or it's done by a separate version of Soundwave." Laserbeak told Shockwave.

"But...how did I manage to tune to it..." Shockwave muttered in response and Laserbeak stared at him guiltily. "What did you do? I'm not mad."

"Okay...I may have accidentally knocked the radio over and had to fix it during one of your random shut-downs that forces you to recharge. Sorry..." Laserbeak ducked his head. "You're not mad, are you?"

"No, I'm still not mad. This is just fascinating." Shockwave decided, looking at the little blue radio. Laserbeak sighed with relief.

"Okay. I gotta explain to Soundwave what we meant. Be back after." Laserbeak excused himself.

"Be responsible." Shockwave firmly advised.

"I will."

---

Soundwave finally was given a portal and he took it, excusing himself. Fate watched him leave, not really all that worried about getting out because they knew it would happen eventually.

Soundwave stared back at someone who looked so much like him. They stared back, removing their visor just to get a better look at Soundwave. They really did look exactly like Soundwave.

"Huh." They spoke. "What do you think of this, Rav?"

A version so like Ravage peeked in curiously before noping right back out. "I'm not dealing with it."

"I'm not asking you too...just...ah frag it. I'm Soundwave. You are?" They asked.

Soundwave furrowed his brow behind his visor before removing it. "Soundwave" reeled back a bit, met with the same face as his own.

"No fragging way...dude…”

---

Hi, yes, this is me playing with a minor crossover of Shattered Glass with Transformers Prime being more of the base set. Tailgate and Cyclonus do appear together, but that's only reasonable since they’re probably both dead in TFP—as is more minicons appearing in the story. Fate is one of my own characters. "The Drifter" that Fate mentions is Megatron in his altered state during the TFP movie.

[asbestos4president]

Hamuel Burger and the American Dream episode 3 Transcript

Episode title: Asbestos Saves Lives!

Asbestos (low energy, bored): … I am coming to you live from the floor, which I refuse to move from until somebody gives me attention. It has been ten days since we started the stream. The ship has moved approximately one American metre. The AC is broken. Abraham refuses to play "I Spy" with me anymore after losing the past seven games. Stanley is on strike until I learn to appreciate him not as a source of cheap labour but as the leading mixed media artist of his generation, which, of course, he communicated via a tear-jerking harmonica rendition of Dolly Parton's "Nine to Five". 

Chat: Are we there yet?

Asbestos: I spy with my little eye, something with a W.

Ham: If it's Worthless Earthling again, I'm turning this spaceship around. 

Asbestos: Fine. I spy with my little eye, something beginning with U. 

Ham: Useless human peasant?

Asbestos (genuinely impressed): Damn, you're good at this. Okay, your turn.

Ham: Could you please stop distracting me while I'm driving?

Asbestos : But I'm bored! This is boring! What's wrong with you, Abraham Nothingburger? You're sitting in a spaceship with an alien worrying about the traffic code. Does the excitement of having every galaxy in the universe at your literal fingertips pale in comparison to the myriad wonders of Bumfuck Nowhere, Idaho? What am I doing wrong?

Chat: I need to pee.

Asbestos: You should have gone before we left!

Chat: If I needed to go before we left, I would have gone before we left. Idiot.

Ham: That's it. If you don't know how to be nice to each other, I'm taking us all back to Idaho.

Asbestos: Wait wait wait wait no no no no! We can be quiet! We can be so quiet! 

Ham: Should have discovered that skill earlier! 

(Doing a bad Asbestos impression) 

Abraham, I'm bored. Make the ship do a barrel roll. Can't you go faster? No, go slower, I saw a cow out the window and I wanna get a picture! Never mind, it was just bigfoot. Haha, made you look! It's too hot in here. It's too cold in here! I ran out of snacks, can you get me some more? 

You're just lucky I'm not dropping you off on the side of the road and making you walk back to your home planet, you no-good-individual! 

[noise an engine shouldn't make]

Was that the engine? I think that was the engine. 

Asbestos: Everybody, stay calm. I have the situation under control. I'm sure you've all noticed this about me, but just for the viewers at home, I'm super masc and handsome and muscular and I totally look like someone who could fix an engine. I'll just use this… What is this?

Chat: That's a spoon.

Asbestos: Right. A screwdriver. I'll just use this screwdriver to, uh… What exactly is it for?

Chat: You use it to fry eggs.

Asbestos: Driving screws! Remarkable. So which end is for whisking and which end is for stapling?

Ham: The engine made a scary noise and we're all gonna die and I never got to say goodbye to my mum!

Asbestos: Don't be so dramatic. It's just a minor technical-

[another even more concerning spaceship noise]

The engine made a scary noise and we're all gonna die and I never got to say goodbye to my mom! Hold me, Abraham! Though we lived as bitter rivals, let us part as bosom friends!

Ham: I don't really want to be friends with anyone's bosom, if you don't mind! 

[harmonica]

What?

Asbestos: I'd like to spend my last moments of life thanking the sponsor of this channel, Gourd VPN. If you're like me, you're always having to parry pernicious pumpkin pirates, stab sinful squash stealers and murder malicious melon marauders. But what if I told you it didn't have to be this way? With Gourd VPN, you can protect your gourds from home without the need for high security vaults, armed bodyguards or begging for your life at knifepoint. That's not all! You can also use Gourd VPN to access varieties of gourd from all over the world, even when they don't usually grow in your climate. Want to grow cucumbers in drought season or bitter gourd in a snowstorm? Look no further than Gourd VPN for all your gourd-related needs. To grab this exclusive deal, just go to gourdvpn.com/asbestos4prez where you can get 0.05% off your three year subscription today. Gourd VPN: when there's a gourd, you're never bored! Terms and conditions apply. Ask your parents before going online. Why aren't we dead yet?

Ham: I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is those noises weren't the engine giving out. The bad news is that Stanley was keeping his homemade kombucha in your fridge and it just exploded everywhere. I found a mop, but it's made of steak. The fridge is also made of steak. Why is everything on your ship made of steak?

Asbestos: Look at that, Asbestos nation! Thanks to my powerful engineering skills, we didn't die! Can I get a W in the chat?

[chorus of Ls from chat]

Chat (diff voice): I still need to pee. 

Asbestos: Alright. We'll stop at the nearest town to recover from our near death experience. Most likely there will be a cafe we can visit. If the president's there, we can poison his soup! I love a good poisoning.

[cut to cafe]

Ham (on phone): Hey, mum! This is [bassoon sound effect]. I'm okay, I'm just at a diner with my friends.

[answering bassoon]

Stanley's here! You like Stanley!

[further bassoon]

Yes, they have gluten-free options.

[just unprecedented levels of bassoonery happening here]

No, I won't eat anything with potassium in it. Or olives. Or boiled plums. Or anything French. 

[bassoon]

Yes, I know goat liver is bad for your skin.

[irritated bassoon]

I'm sorry.

[scornful bassoon]

I'll definitely do it when I get home.

[disbelieving bassoon]

I know. I'm sorry.

[enquiring bassoon]

Hang on, I'll ask.

Asbestos, do you think you can drop me back home by five? It's really important.

Asbestos: Pass me the phone.

[glass smashing sound effect]

That's better!

Ham: Oh, my goodness gracious! For crying out loud, Asbestos Margaret Le Guin! What did you go and do that for?

Chat: Damn. He's so mad at you that he gave you a middle name! 

37. Asbestos

You should be thanking me. You know the government can track you on those things. I think I'll order the potassium, boiled plum, and goat liver special. Extra French, if you please.

Waitress: We're all outta French.

Asbestos: Belgian is fine.

Waitress: We're all outta Belgian!

Asbestos: Canadian?

Waitress: Don't come into my diner with your foul language!

Ham: Stanley, what are you planning on getting?

[harmonica noises]

Waitress: We're all outta [harmonica noises]!

Asbestos: Is there anything you do have?

Waitress: We can't afford ingredients because everyone's been paying us in political flyers!

Asbestos:  Let me see that!

(reading)

Bribera Berry for president 2024. A vote for Bribera is a vote to go in the draw to win one of five cars. 

How come I never thought of making pamphlets? No, too small. Posters. A billboard! Abraham, listen. I need my face plastered on every available surface. I need my name written in blinking lights 50 feet above the highway with a witty yet thought-provoking slogan such as "Asbestos Saves Lives!" or "Kids Love Asbestos!" I need to become the leading cause of traffic accidents in America because people were too busy looking at my sick sign to pay attention to the road!

Ham: I always got the impression you were too caught up in causing mass extinction events to ever show much interest in graphic design. 

Asbestos: You're right. Murder should have always been my priority, but I was distracted by the lure of political advertising, that sultry little minx. It may happen again. Now, where can we find this Barbara Barry? 

Waitress: She's doing a charity event to raise funds for the poor. I doubt they'll let you in.

Asbestos: Why not?

Waitress: It's only open to the very rich, the very famous and the very beautiful. You, on the other hand, are wearing a… What is that?

Asbestos (proudly): It's goth!

Waitress: It looks like a lung from an anti-smoking campaign. I didn't know those came in turquoise.

Asbestos: I got it on Temu! Me and my companions here are already the very famous and the very beautiful, but as for the very rich… Abraham! I need some fundraising solutions!

Ham: Start a lemonade stand. Found a pyramid scheme. Sell a few of your more redundant organs. Rob a bank. I don't care. Stanley, come with me. We're going home.

[scene change. they are outside now]

So that's the long and convoluted story of how I ended up working at this lemonade stand. Would you like a straw with that?

Passerby: Oh, I'm not buying. I was just making sure this here suspicious looking individual wasn't holding you hostage in violation of child labour laws and common human decency. 

Ham: I'm nineteen!

Passerby: Good job counting that high, kiddo. Are you sure you don't need me to call the police?

Asbestos: Lemonade! Lemonade! Come getcher ice cold legally acquired lemonade! Only fifty bucks a cup! Or more if you look like you have a lot of money. Hey, you! You're a sad and dehydrated individual. I'll give you half a lemon peel for the low low price of everything you've ever loved!

Passerby 2: Uh, I only have these Bribera Berry election fliers. Do you accept those as payment? This one is signed!

Asbestos: No the hell we do not, punk! Fuck your fliers! Besides, that signature is clearly forged.

Passerby 2: It is?!

Asbestos: New tactic. Pyramids! Pyramids! Come getcher ice cold legally acquired pyramids! And if you recruit two others to help us sell these, you win the chance to lose time and money!

Passerby 1: It's a deal! How many fliers for three pyramids?

Asbestos: None! We accept cash, we accept card, we don't accept excuses! New tactic. Organs! Organs! Come getcher ice-cold legally acquired organs! 

(quieter)

Abraham, you don't smoke or drink, right?

Passerby 2: I'll take his liver for fifty fliers!

Asbestos: Godammit. Well, I didn't want to do this (yes I did) but you've left me no choice (there are innumerable other choices that I'm discounting right now). There's one place in this town guaranteed to have money, and that's…

Ham: The swimming pool?

Asbestos: No.

Ham: The local kindergarten!

Asbestos: Nuh uh.

Ham: The library?

Asbestos: Are you kidding?

Ham: Um… Can I get a hint?

Wait, you don't mean- No no no, we're not doing this. Stanley, tell her to stop. Stanley!

[suspenseful music]

Trailer voiceover: This summer… Three friends will attempt the heist of the century, but only three will survive! Starring Asbestos Le Guin as a badboy with a sensitive side!

Asbestos: Robber? I hardly know 'er!

Trailer voiceover: Hamuel Burger as her quirky animal sidekick!

Ham: Please get me out of here! I don't want to go to jail!

Trailer voiceover: And Stanley Knife as a warrior space cowgirl! I'm not entirely sure how that fits in with the group's cover story, but he just seemed so excited to dress up that we didn't have the heart to say no. Garfield Five: The Beast Within! Coming to cinemas August 29th. Wait, that can't be the right title. Can I do a retake? 

[trailer music ends]

[scene change. we're at the bank.] 

Bank Teller: Welcome to the Bank of America, ma'am. Sir? Um, you with the shapely antennae. Would you like to make a deposit?

Asbestos: Yeah, I'm just having a slight issue. We actually came here to rob this bank, but I've cracked open every vault and there doesn't seem to be any money inside. Do you have any idea where we can find it? And I come from a noble warrior/poet race known as "the streamers". You may address me as such.

Bank Teller: Sorry, Mr. the Streamer, I'm afraid there's none left. Ever since Bribera Berry began her campaign, everyone in the town withdrew their life's savings to buy her political fliers. I'm not sure if you've noticed, but they've become a kind of de facto currency around here.

Asbestos: Oh, we've noticed. We've noticed. Thanks anyway.

This is it, chat. This is the end. What kind of a streamer am I if I can't even scam my way into a charity event to kill my opponent? Although I suppose I could try just blowing up the building from the outside… No, even the explosives in this town are probably made of fliers. What about sneaking in disguised as a waiter? No, my zest for life and optimistic outlook render me unable to make a convincing hospitality worker. Alright, I'm taking suggestions from the floor.

Chat: I think if you just keep killing people, eventually it'll all work out. #istandwithasbestos #asbestosdidnothingwrong 

Chat (diff voice): That's right, keep encouraging her. I'm taking bets on how deep of a hole she can dig herself into.

Chat (diff voice): 6 feet.

Chat (diff voice): 100 feet. 

Chat (diff voice): Hahahahaheeheehoohoo. You said feet.

Ham: Well, it was nice meeting you, but it looks like your presidential campaign has come to an end. No need to give us a lift back to Idaho, there's a bus we can catch that leaves in 15 minutes. Stanley and I wish you the best in your future endeavours. Goodbye forever!

[harmonica]

I'm not telling her that.

[harmonica]

No, stop encouraging her!

Asbestos: What is it?

Ham: Stanley was just remarking on how we left the diner without finishing our food. He's hungry, Asbestos! You're contributing to the harmful romanticisation of the starving artist by denying a growing boy his food!

Asbestos: It's unamerican to lie, Abraham Nothingburger. I see your famous nickname, "Honest Abe", was nothing but jest. I bet the thing about doing your homework on the back of a coal shovel was a falsehood as well! What about you is real, young man? Nothing? Nothing at all? You disappoint me. 

Ham: For the last time, my name isn't Abraham!

Asbestos: See? Even his name is a lie! I know your mother didn't raise you like this, kid. What did Stanley really say?

Ham: He didn't say anything!

Asbestos: That's interesting, because I distinctly heard royalty free jaunty harmonica sound effect 5 dot mp3. Are you telling me I was hallucinating?

[royalty free jaunty harmonica sound effect 5 dot mp3]

There it is again! Are you telling me that wasn't royalty free jaunty harmonica sound effect 5 dot mp3?

Ham: Fine. Stanley says that if the people in this town want fliers so much, we should just sell them fliers. 

Asbestos: Why the hell didn't I think of that? Fliers! Fliers! Come getcher ice-cold legally acquired fliers! 

[commotion]

Passerby 1: I'll take a thousand in exchange for my house, my dog, my dignity, half my lifespan… Nay, my whole lifespan, for my existence dwindles to nought in comparison to a signed, limited edition Bribera Berry flier!

Asbestos: I'll just take your money, if that's okay. Put that kidney back where it belongs! Ew! Ew! Stop trying to give me your firstborn children, this thing isn't even authentic! I forged the signature myself, see? It's written in glitter pen! I made eight spelling errors!

Passerby 1: Even better! Once Presidential Candidate Bribera Berry sees that I would lay down my life for the chance to grasp even a pale mockery of her grace, she shall surely reply to my fanmail! I've sent her three marriage proposals and still haven't heard back. Do you think they got lost in the mail?

Ham: They're buying the fliers faster than we can print them! The copy machine almost tore my arm off!

Asbestos: Well, put a bandaid on the stump and keep working! If you have time to bleed, you have time to fuel capitalist greed!

Herald: Make way! Make way! I come bearing a message from her supreme graciousness lady Bribera Berry of the United States! Are you disgraced streamer Asbestos le Guin? Ah, you must be. I can tell from your swagless aura and general lack of redeeming qualities. The lady Bribera has heard that, despite being her greatest rival in this race to kill the- I mean, become the president, you have been handing out political fliers endorsing her for the position. She just thinks it's so nice to see women in politics supporting each other and invites you to attend her charity event so that you may speak face to face. 

Asbestos: Women in politics? Women in politics? I'm a woman in severe mental distress and a man badly in need of a drink. Abraham! Fetch me my apple juice!

Ham: Would you like ice with that?

Asbestos: And a little umbrella. I'm feeling distinctly tropical.

Credits

Asbestos: Podcast! Podcast! Come get your ice cold legally acquired podcast! May contain traces of lemons squeezed by Bulk, a bucket of sugar poured in by Spikes, a few cups of water added by Rawlyx, ice cubes frozen by Devyn Boer, a bottle of three in one shampoo snuck in by Lumi Oakes, a few teeth lost by Dan Mac, ten drops of red dye 40 contributed by N. V. May, and the last remaining scrap of hope for humanity that Maddie Girouard possessed. The Asbestos Le Guin corporation will not be held liable for any deaths resulting from the consumption of this fun and fizzy beverage. Drink at your own risk.

[non-binary-laurie-strode]

Gellar talked about Parton’s involvement on the show in an interview last year noting that she never actually got to meet her in person. “Yes, little known fact, the legend Dolly Parton was a producer,” Gellar said during an interview on The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon from Feb. 2023. ���We never saw her [but] we’d get Christmas gifts in the beginning that would have our name, and I would think, ‘She doesn’t even know who I am.’ And then one day, someone asked her about it, and she complimented the show and my performance. I was like, ‘Oh, I can die now. Dolly Parton knows who I am and thinks I’m good.’”

Dolly Parton was a producer on Buffy the Vampire Slayer???????

[tartrat]

Weird Mugshots Part 2, Ari! (Remake)

She looks somewhat normal now and doesn’t have an awkwardly elongated face! Going into more detail below. I'm just going to keep the old one up, just feels right for some reason. For context i remade this because i thought the other one looked weird.

So Firstly here’s the comparison between this new one and the last one. New is on the Left and Old is on the Right.

I made her face a bit rounder,

added volume to the hair as well as making it look somewhat natural and not like she's having a bad hair day,

added a glitter texture to her top (Even though its plain in game) to just added some form of texture and not have it not look flat

Made the gloves a bit redder. They appear to just be solid black in game, but i just wanted her hands to not look muddled

Gave her some black eyeliner and shortened the cat's eye liner(I don't know what its actually called)

Fixed the shadows and glow . The glow being changed to look like an actual light makes the drawing look less sickly.

Made her mouth smaller and not awkwardly positioned.

Her left arm (Right on screen) is a bit thinner.

This was honestly a good way to take my mind off of the internet as its seemingly going up in flames anytime i check the for you page on twitter. That and also how the other night when i was trying to sleep, i started to think about how Cher and Dolly Parton are getting older and will die and just how sad it will be. Also Airbud, Airbud had so much more life in him. The Ari and Grace Wedding map should be for Believe by Cher. Would it make sense? probably not. We also need 9 to 5 or Jolene in the game. That was a weird tangent i'm sorry. I just can't think about things for too long before i start to panic.

I also changed the Agent D drawing a bit but that one is just that her blouse is semi transparent and you can see her arms through it like in game. Not really going to post that because its not that different.

I've also started to work on testing out a simpler art style and my idea for Just Dance but as a platform fighter. If we ever get a Just Dance rep for smash bros, Ari should be one of the alternate costumes alongside brezziana. Their like the two coaches who could beat you up if they wanted to. I'm mainly doing this because its been floating around in my head for a month and thought it would be funny. I'm only saying that Ari would beat you up because of her rivalry with Moxie and for some reason i can see it being like one of the fights from glee.

Also here’s a work in progress screenshot that makes her look like some horror character whose mouth is covered by skin. Like Deadpool in that Xmen movie. Maybe thats a thing to do, have different coaches cosplay as marvel heroes.

[katieaki]

Please excuse the lack of art here as I am on vacation away from my computer, but:

My post-apocalyptic Lesbian Cowgirl Mailman choose-your-own adventure has just updated! Read it here for free on my Patreon and vote in the poll!

I made a summary of the first part, here, which tells you basically everything you need to know about Lou, her requited-but-complicated love with a saloon girl she had to leave behind, her unpleasant but sophisticated traveling companion, and the ill-advised journey they are on!

In this update, the girls are coming to terms with the idea that they just might be lost. Maybe. In the uninhabited Wasteland. With limited food and water. Lou also finds out that Holliday has a hidden (or, potentially just overlooked) talent! :-) Also she gets to touch boobs. :-)

The girls are talking about Barbara Allen, one of my fav old ballads that I reference constantly as if people just know it. Here’s Dolly’s version of it, which is obviously just incredible.

Excerpt under the cut!

“Poor old Sweet William,” Lou said over lunch. The song from the night before had been stuck in her head all day. “Sick with love. Dying of love.”

“He got off easy,” Holliday said. “All he had to do was be in love and then die. The two most natural things in the world. Barbara had to come to terms with her own feelings, followed, of course, by the guilt of what she’d done to the one she only just now found out she loved back. To realize she’s been so cruel and haughty that the birds in the sky are chastising her for her behavior. So cruel that, even when she’s dead and should be at peace, her grave grows only briars. That’s who should have your sympathy.”

“She deserves to be ate up with misery!” Lou said, washing her tin plate in the little stream they had stopped at. “Even if she didn’t love him, or didn’t think she loved him, she could have been a little kinder. ‘Young man, I think you’re dying?’”

“No one is obliged to reciprocate love for anyone else, Lou,” Holliday said. “No matter how pathetic they are. Even if it hurts the other party terribly.”

Lou felt, suddenly, that they were not talking about the song anymore. She felt her face go hot and she continued to pack up in silence. Venus had not been cruel like that. She would never have a briar grow from her grave.