#I wonder if I can dig out my old art from this game

[foxtrottcantfindshit]

My interest took a hard left, all the way back to when I was a teenager and this game came out in 2016!!!

Still one of my top favorite games of all time I’m almost sure this is #1 or #2 and of course, my favorite was Noct

[leighsartworks216]

Spring Wedding

Sylus x gn!Reader

I am trying to post this so fast before my class begins oh lordy

Edit: changed "my dearest" to "my beloved"

Warnings: past relationship, minor references/implications of emotional/mental abuse, backhanded compliments, protective Sylus, fake relationship

Word Count: 824

Main Masterlist

Love and Deepspace Masterlist

AO3

You hold tighter to Sylus's hand, your other hand wrapping around his elbow and hugging his arm to your chest to keep you as close to him as possible. Sylus notices right away, but before he can ask what’s wrong, a voice calls your name from several feet away.

“Is that really you?”

Despite your obvious signs of discomfort, you turn to the voice and plaster a smile on your face. Sure enough, your ex was there in the flesh. Memories of the backhanded compliments and insistence on pushing boundaries fill your mind, alighting every nerve with the desire to run. “Oh, wow, hi! I didn’t expect to see you here,” you greet with faux enthusiasm.

The person can’t seem to keep their eyes off you, ignoring your partner for the night entirely. Sylus had your outfit perfectly tailored and detailed to match him tonight, but the way they studied you made you want to cover yourself with his jacket. You wonder if he’d let you.

Sylus squeezes your hand, a silent question. You respond immediately, the tips of your nails beginning to dig into his knuckles.

“You look amazing! I haven’t seen you in so long, I almost didn’t recognize you. That training really shaped you up,” they chuckle.

You cough politely, a distraction from answering their… compliments.

“Sweetie,” Sylus pipes up, leaning closer to you, “you haven’t introduced us.” His smirk is smug and intimidating, but you can see the fire in his eyes. Your ex doesn’t notice, too busy taking in every intricate detail of your face like an art curator at a high-end museum.

“Oh, right!” You nod toward them, introducing them by name. “We dated in high school, before I went off to the Hunter’s Association. And this is Sylus, my-”

“Their husband.” You discretely pinch his arm. Sylus laughs. “Sorry, sweetheart, I couldn’t resist. I just love how it sounds.”

The ex blinks, as though they’ve just been rudely awoken from a dream. “Husband? What? When did you get married?” Their question emphasizes the fact it’s you, rather than the union itself.

If this is the game Sylus wants to play, you have no choice now but to play your part. “Oh, it was last spring! It was beautiful! The ceremony was held underneath cherry blossom trees and a full moon.”

They raise an eyebrow, a taunting grin dancing unsurely on their lips. “And you didn’t think to invite me?”

“No,” Syus answers. It’s sharp, abrupt, leaving absolutely no room for questions. It wipes the look off their face.

They look you up and down, frowning. “I don’t see any rings.”

Sylus chuckles again, tilting his head in a belittling fashion. “Rings are hardly enough of a symbol for our love. I crafted them a set of guns. Why don’t you show him?”

You smile as you play along, letting go of Sylus’s elbow to retrieve the gun holstered at your thigh. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it? He designed every aspect of them, down to the design on the grip.” With years of firearms training under your belt, you maneuver the weapon skillfully around your fingers, before slotting it back in place, reminiscent of old world cowboys. You replace your hand on his arm, beaming as you look up at him. “Show them the knife I made you, darling.”

“Of course, my beloved.” Oh, he was enjoying this much more than he let on. He pulled out a hunting knife from his belt, deftly spinning it around his own fingers before balancing it by the tip on his finger. “I just need to find an opportunity to try it out.” He tests the weight of it in his hand, as though trying to decide the best way to skin an animal. With the way he’s looking at your ex, it’s clear just who he’s thinking of testing it on.

They swallow at the thinly veiled threat. “Th- They look really nice!” they stammer. They try to laugh it off, but it comes off thick and anxious. Their grin is shaky at the corners. “Well, it was, uh, nice to see you again.” Seeming at a bit of a loss for how to extricate themself from the situation, they land somewhere between bowing and waving, before scurrying away. Sylus tucks the knife back in his belt.

You feel like you can breathe again once they’re out of earshot.

You sigh, mask slipping, and lean heavier into Sylus’s side. He squeezes your hand softly. “Thank you for scaring them off.”

He tucks a piece of hair behind your ear. “Of course. How could I possibly let my spouse suffer their existence any longer than necessary?”

You snicker. “I’m not your spouse, you don’t have to keep pretending anymore.”

“No? Damn. And I was already making arrangements for our spring wedding.” He puts his hand on his chin to mime thinking. “Under cherry blossoms and a full moon, hm?”

“Oh, shut up.”

[artdcnaldson]

thinking about pre engagement art at his first olympics. you’re doing coverage for a mag back home on some player from your hometown. but art. beautiful fucking art who you run into the morning of your first day and who you convince to come to your hotel so he can get away from the rickety little twin beds at the village. butter him up with a drink. only one, won’t hurt his game. you talk and talk you god you wish your story could be about him instead. and he stays the night in the hotel with you and is gone when you wake up but he’s left an official statement on his wonderful teammate, hometown guy, for your story that will make your boss happy. when you get home after your story star gets knocked in the round of 16 there’s flowers and your hotel has been paid off until the final. he wants to go to dinner after he wins gold and take polaroids of you w nothing but his medal on.

if u have room for 🫐 anon, i will keep homeostasis w my zweiginator emoji anon

Omg hi sorry I sat on this so long <333 RAHHHH pre engagement pretty angel curls art playing tennis at the Olympics makes me feel SO CRAZY

EEEEEP using your press pass to get access to all of his matches, even though you really should get home. Art’s dominating the court— effortless and beautiful. You’re there when he wins the gold medal match against an older, seasoned player, and he’s so gracious to the player’s face, to the press.

“It was a tough match,” he says into a microphone as you stand close by, thankful for the press badge around your neck. “I’m just lucky to get the chance to play with one of the greats.”

He smiles, charming and victorious when they take photos of him with his medal. The American flag in the background and him, the spitting image of homegrown, good old fashioned athletic talent.

The dinner is nice, fancier than you’re used to on a journalist’s budget. He’s just got a new sponsorship with Nike, so they pay for a lot. He buys a nice bottle of wine and bashfully admits he doesn’t know a lot about what makes it nice, other than the price tag. It’s charming, it’s sweet.

Sitting across from him at the table, you know he’s got less than innocent intentions for the night. Just three days ago, he had you sinking down on his cock, riding him hard and fast and crying out his name like it was a form of worship.

“Do you want to see the medal?” He asks once you’ve finished dessert.

You forget the question by the time you’re in his room in the Olympic village, when he’s mouth is on yours and his hands are ripping at your clothes. The bed is soft, plush beneath you as he drops you onto it, laid bare and wanting. You part your legs invitingly, wordlessly begging for him to strip off the rest of his clothes and bury himself inside of you.

You’d even let him do it raw— a present for his gold medal win.

But he disappears, digging in his suitcase until he retrieves the medal from within. Orange and red ribbon and a big gold medal at the center. Before you can say anything, he’s slipped it around your neck, so the gold is nestled between your breasts.

“Pretty,” he muses, fingers circling the cold medal where it rests. “Can I take a picture?”

“Yeah,” you answer quickly. He could’ve suggested anything, really, and you would’ve said yes. He was just so beautiful, so charming. You wanted to please him more than anything.

He pulls out a digital camera and powers it on. It whirrs softly as he zooms in, then snaps a photo of the medal resting between your tits. “Pose for me,” he says, but he has another idea already. His hands move up, sliding from your hip, up your abdomen, until it cups your breast in one large palm. He snaps another photo, smiling behind the camera.

“You’re so fucking hot,” he muses. He nudges your thighs apart and toys with your clit, just on the good side of teasing. Slow, insistent circles that make you grow even wetter, even needier. He zooms out, takes a full body shot (because he’ll die before he forgets this pussy) and tosses the camera to the side.

He hikes your legs over his shoulders and buries his face between your thighs— mouthing hungrily at your cunt. His tongue laves over your center, lapping at the wetness that had been steadily leaking from your cunt since dinner. He moans against you, as he nuzzles his nose against your clit to get closer and closer. “Taste so good—“ his words are mostly muffled against you, as he licks and sucks on your pussy, face shiny with slick and spit.

You cum easily, your body responding to his touches so openly. Like it’s his toy to use. He smiles up at you as you pant and tremble, cunt fluttering with aftershocks. He kisses your thigh gently, reverently.

It’s not long before he’s sinking into you. Your pussy so soft and warm and wet for him, sucking him in, aching for something to fill that empty spot inside. You whine and gasp as he nudges against your cervix, buried deep, finding home there.

“That’s it,” he hums as you instinctively wrap your legs around his waist. “Pull me in deeper. Just like that.”

His pace is slow, his thrusts deep. You feel so close to him as he boxes you in, arms on either side of your head, fucking you like he’s making love. When he leans down and kisses you, it feels like heaven, which seems appropriate for a boy who looks like an angel.

[iamespecter]

I LOVE that FNAF SB art you did with Vanny, Monty, and Roxy capturing Chica!

Please please tell me where I can read your Glamrock Chica analysis! I'm a long-time FNAF fan and I LOOOOOVE hearing people's analyses and theories! 🤩

The connections people make amaze me all the time and I love when someone connects some dots and is tapping the paper going "See?! Look at these! Isn't that odd?!" and I'm on the edge of my seat going "OMG that is so odd! Please tell me more my brainy friend!"

Thanks!! Tbh, I wanna remake these again sometime because these were made back in 2023 and I wanna see how far my skills have gone now lol

Also I would LOVE to give you the link to my Glamrock Chica analysis, but that's on twitter.... and the thought of going back to twitter..... /neg

So instead I will put the google docs version here! Btw, this analysis was done way before Ruin (specifically, this was back in 2022), which means there could be some outdated information in it.

Also, I don't trust word by mouth, and by extension, Ruin. With Scott's history of retconning, and the very obvious lack of regard towards Chica.... yeah. This means this is an analysis that only applies to Security Breach entirely.

WARNING FOR LONG READ!

So, about Chica.

It's been thrown around that she barely has any personality to go with based on in-game when I digress about that fact. I've actually been studying Chica's movements to the best I can, casually looking up every canon footage on yt and going to the wiki for recorded audio proofs. The only thing I wish is that people would dig up a datamine about each animatronic animations so I can see them in clearer light.

But setting aside that for now, let's talk about something Chica audio-related.

So I've been thinking. Chica's speech pattern is definitely peculiar, especially if you compare it to the rest of the Glamrocks. Her speech is definitely reminiscent of that a pre-programmed voiceline, and perhaps, it is at some point. However, going further than that even, what makes Chica stand out amongst the rest is one thing: Her calling out for GREGORY BY NAME.

Freddy knowing Gregory's name is obvious, Gregory introduced himself to him. But why does Chica know, when Gregory has never talked, nor introduced himself to Chica once?

Is it the Fazwatch? Yes, but indirectly.

Did she overhear it? Impossible, her green room is the farthest away from Freddy.

My answer: Vanessa. Or more accurately, Vanny. She knows Gregory's name because of the Fazwatch.

But this.... this doesn't make sense! If Chica says it, how come Roxy and Monty don't? They never call Gregory by his name, not even once! I truly believe that they DON'T KNOW GREGORY'S NAME. You can argue that perhaps, it's just their method of speaking. i.e, "kid" and "little guy", and it's a bit that but I really think otherwise.

Why? it's because they're not under influence like Chica is. More on that later. (elaborated further on "About Roxy and Monty.... and why Chica is odder in terms of hunting methods than the two.")

Something I wanna bring to the table as well: Chica may be selectively mute. Or to be more precise, is going through traumatic mutism.

I've talked about this a bit with my friends on discord, this is something that I've found. We know for a fact that Chica's voice is pretty damn powerful. Enough to make Freddy's voice more gravelly than it is, and to produce high frequencies that disable voice-activated locks. A blessing for players, but a curse for the chicken.

Therefore, what if Chica doesn't want to speak at all outside of the hack?

Some evidences to back this up:

The biggest clue of them all, The duffelbags.

A report about her upgrade shows that her experimental voicebox caused impairment to bot navigations, and a lot of chaos + lawsuits from party attenders. This voicebox was never replaced despite advisement saying (which makes me wonder what the hell happened to her old voicebox-), so I think Glamrock Chica developed a fear of raising her tone, or speaking entirely.

(- MAINT LOG: CHICA - Don't let her sing! Messes with the navigation of the other bots. Horrible results when she sang during live performance. S.T.A.F.F. bots dropping serving trays, chaos, guest injuries, 12 lawsuits. Experimental voice box test failed. Replacement advised. -)

The vents scene. Out of everyone, Glamrock Chica NEVER spoke in the vents section.

We never hear a sound from her, not even a squeak, a grunt, a sigh or a sound of acknowledgement. She just... plays her guitar. We hear Monty raging in his room, Roxy complementing herself, And Freddy, well, being Freddy. In fact, we never get to hear ANYTHING from her verbal-wise, that is until she begins chasing down Gregory. You know, when she's already hacked.

Staying around Chica's vicinity.

After a round or two of her voicelines, Chica starts sobbing. What's weird is that this "crying" is almost silent. Like, she doesn't wanna allow anyone to hear it. She's holding it back but at the same time, she just can't. Here's a yt video that a poster explains how they got this line: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cK7cQphVgZw

Lastly, her voiceline's tone.

She speaks in a sing-song manner, yet sometimes it sounds almost like a whisper. Reminiscent of Vanny's tone as well. What does help back this last evidence is the fact that Freddy has a scrapped voiceline in the Burntrap fight with the SAME DAMN SING-SONG TONE.

Also, can we please talk about Chica's behavioral pattern?

Not enough people point this out, but like damn. Does she look SO uninterested when chasing you down. Her shoulders are slumped, she's tilting her head lazily, and she slowly jogs towards you. Not to mention, that when she spawns behind you and when she's idle/stops in her patrol route to look around, she will momentarily stop to twitch, making various clicking servos noises as if the programming is glitching back and forth... or she's actively being hacked.

And what's up with her green room while we're on the topic of her behavior?

An easy answer would be that she's of course, a starter antagonist. An enemy designed to introduce you to the game's mechanics, a base foe that's a little bit easier to evade and/or fight than others. (they kinda failed lol)

However, a lore-wise answer would be that she's being forced against her will to do so. She doesn't wanna chase down Gregory and hurt him, but unfortunately Vanny's overriding her programming completely, so she can't do anything but watch as her body does the hunting for her.

Aside from that, I think the glitching out must be a result of Chica's original programming (unsuccessfully) trying to fight off the control, hence the momentary idle when she spawns in after being alerted unlike the two who immediately rushes in to attack.

Most people in the fandom believe that Chica's glitch and twitchiness comes from the fact that her insides are being messed up by her eating trash.

I can see where they're coming from, but I kind of... don't believe this? Mostly because one, Fazbear Entertainment is absolutely aware of Chica's habit to eat, therefore this "eating" thing was never intended to be a glitch but rather a feature (I'm definitely certain it's to promote their food since that's the most obvious answer), which means she definitely has a pouch for the food she eats somewhere in her torso. And two, she throws up the trash she eats (if you watch her closely in the cameras), so it doesn't stay there long enough to mess with her insides.

Chica's mannerisms of eating trash is definitely a result of stress eating, though.

Oh, and before I forget, what about Chica's Green Room? Why is it that compared to others, hers is the messiest (excluding the damage Monty did to his, of course) ? I'm talking pizza boxes scattered everywhere on the floor, desserts, trashbags and junk food all around, like a depression room, almost. My friend Nexus once again, assumes this to be because Chica is programmed to have ADHD to be "relatable", and this much I believe.

Chica is shown in the intro to do "dino arms". Dino/T-Rex arms are a common symptom for neurodivergency (and I tend to do this as well), often done subconsciously. Also, I think it's pretty funny considering Chica is a chicken, and chickens are said to be the closest relative to Dinosaurs.

Her being the easiest to lose once Gregory makes enough distance and goes around enough corners may also be something intentionally programmed into her. Neurodivergent people tend to lose track of things easily, and get distracted by something that piques their interest (something I relate way too well)

It's also possible that dancing may be a way to let extra energy loose for Chica. I think it's safe to assume that Chica can canonically dance, if Mazercise is taken into account for this. People with ADHD have too much energy in them should it be something they love to do, and they need an outlet for these kinds of things.

her "bawking" is possibly verbal stimming, as no other Glamrocks produce animalistic sounds like her when they are hit with the fazerblaster/flashed by the fazcam.

The difficulty of her maintaining her room as clean as the others could also be seen as part of her neurodivergent programming.

I can't help but see these evidences to be a part of a neurodivergent programming, possibly coded to be like this in favor of relatability. Knowing Fazbear Entertainment, coding one of their robots to have ADHD makes absolute sense if it meant raking in more money towards the teens.

Dumpster Diving: Trying to explain why Chica eats trash

Ah, yes. Stress eating. What seems to be a minor problem, but is quite prominent amongst people. Stress eating is a result of finding comfort in putting food in your mouth for temporary relief. Emotional eating is eating as a way to suppress or soothe negative emotions, such as stress, anger, fear, boredom, sadness and loneliness. Major life events or, more commonly, the hassles of daily life can trigger negative emotions that lead to emotional eating.

So, we know Chica is a compulsive eater. It seems that at every opportunity she can, she'd try to stuff her face with garbage. But why specifically garbage?

It's a literal take for "junk food", basically. Unhealthy foods are often called to be garbage food that provides temporary satisfaction, but can definitely mess you up in the long run depending on how much you eat. (thanks to my friend Nexus on this theory)

Her systems may have confused trash for pizza, however this may also be unlikely but I just wanna throw this out there.

This is an unhealthy coping mechanism. With the stress of losing Bonnie as her bandmate, and the addition of her body moving on it's own, I think she's trying to cope by eating the closest thing to food as kitchen supplies are kept away from her, which are leftovers thrown away.

About Roxy and Monty.... and why Chica is odder in terms of hunting methods than the two.

I'm definitely gonna be scrutinized by the community with this, but.... I don't think Roxy and Monty are under control. And I get it, a lot of y'all favor the others over Chica.

I just want you all to hear me out for a second, though. I've been doing my own fair share of researching the other two.

...Not as much as I did with Chica, but just enough to know that they're not hacked like she is.

it could be:

Monty is doing this hunting thing all on his own, full-stop. He didn't need to get Aftoned, since he and Vanny could have established a deal with each other. Vanny gets kids to gather remnant from, and Monty is promised the lead role. Something that we know he DESPERATELY WANTS, if you've seen the Monty Golf Arcade stage. (Which I think gives us something new to think about why Freddy isn't hacked in the first place)

Roxy is not hacked, but she's not doing this hunting thing out of free will either. I think she was peer pressured (or coerced even), manipulated to hunt down children for remnant experiments. She's pretty easy to break as seen by how she's immediately crying, convincing herself that she's not a loser, which implies Vanessa called her one when she went through the wolf's room. Perhaps she too, was promised an audience that would adore her if she did it successfully.

Chica is absolutely hacked. Aside from Moon, she's definitely under the influence of Afton/Vanny. She doesn't seem to be ego-driven like the two, therefore she drives a hard bargain. I believe she wasn't swayed with Vanny's manipulation, and this costed her her free will. A rather unfortunate trade.

It's really weird how people seem to dismiss the fact that Roxy and Monty walks and talks normally, chases Gregory like this hunt is all part of the gig, when Chica doesn't. Because I'm over here thinking that's a huge indication that, yeah, Chica might be hacked, and the other two aren't. (or at least, not to the extent that Chica is)

And about the scrapped possessed Freddy voicelines, too. I swear, Chica's voiceline tones and his match way too close for comfort, and I think that's the biggest clue for Chica being hacked yet.

I do think that Chica was also hacked with the intention of manipulating Gregory to trust and follow her like that one "nice" stranger, since she's basically like Freddy normally (if it's Roxy and Monty that's cool and ego-driven for audiences, then it'd make sense for Freddy and Chica to be the "Papa Bear" and "Mother Hen" to kids attending the pizzaplex). She definitely gives off bubbly girl vibes if we just... ignore Valley Chica and push her to the side.

I don't think I'll be making a Mazercise analysis because jesus christ Chica I love you but goddamn does your venue suck so much ass

Vanessa and Chica: Parallels between a bunny-costumed killer, and a guitarist animatronic performer

Now this is something I've never seen nor heard to be talked about with in the community other than my friend who's really good at observations and theories, and that's the parallel between the white woman jumpscare and the funny haha trash eater --and I'm not sure if that's because Chica is obscure compared to others, or not enough people like Chica to the point of theorizing about this.

Or I just live under a rock, that's all.

But, I think there's some lines to draw with Vanessa and Chica. How they're both under the influence of a higher being, reluctantly following. Taken over, even. A human and an psuedo-sentient AI, going through the same horrible thing.

Where one has submitted herself to the control, while the other is actively fighting back against it and refuses (although fails). Unfortunately there's not much to say here yet due to the fact that we don't have all the details just yet, but this is where the Ruin DLC kicks down my door and punches me square in the stomach then proceeds to spit on my face as I lay on the floor sobbing. (Future me saying yes it has done this to me but it made me go "WHAT THE FUCK MAN." in a /neg way)

I do hope that Steel Wool explores this concept even further, and maybe even a showdown between the two. That'd be pretty badass. Will an AI win against a force where a human couldn't?

Time will tell.

So, what's the summary for Chica?

I think it's really tragic that all this speculation gives out the idea that Chica is dealing with a lot of stress caused by keeping to herself, and even a depression state.

An experimental voicebox going haywire, causing trauma to her evolving psuedo-sentience code and refraining her from speaking most of the time. The start of an unhealthy food obsession as coping mechanism. And then after that, mourning the sudden loss of someone called a friend, coupled by a virus corrupting her systems, further strengthening the desire of emotional consumption. A robot programmed to be quirky and relatable, going through so much, and what makes this even worse is the fact that I don't think ANYONE in the Glamrocks ever know about what she's dealing with.

She only eats trash when she's alone and separated from the rest of the hunters, and weeps silently, keeping her sobs of grief to herself only. A kind-hearted figure, ruined by serial killer's doing. She cares SO MUCH as evidenced by the intro, yet the care she receives back is little to none.

A character thrown to the side all because her story isn't out there, like Freddy acting as a father-figure fill-in for a homeless orphan, Roxy with her low self-esteem hidden underneath a fragile sense of narcissism, or even Monty with his strong desire to be the one underneath the spotlight and willing to do whatever it takes just to make that come true. Hell, there's more Bonnie fans than Chica and the guy doesn't even make a single appearance.

Instead, she's disregarded by the community to be the bland one all because of misunderstandings and lack of evidences presented onto the table.

I think, out of all of them, she deserved her brutal fate THE LEAST if not at all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading if you've reached this far! I believe I wrote this analysis with some passive aggressiveness because I was so frustrated that I could barely get my voice out to talk to the fandom about Chica, but I tried my best to make it more... polite lol

Hopefully, tumblr is nicer than twitter when it comes to theories.

Also, I actually wanted to make my own version of Chica's venue! Please someone ask me about it please please please please please Mazercise physically hurts me to the core

[zedecksiew]

Mechanics as Bits

EDIT:

Freddie Foulds over on Bluesky found the post for me! It was a Chris McDowall post: Alien Dojos.

This is now a fan post about the genius that is Alien Dojos.

Every martial art described there (for use with Into The Odd) has a resolution mechanic that involves doing something tactile with dice, beyond just rolling.

For "Bafistan Fist Fighting" each punch is a d6, "rolled" by "throwing them into the air and punching them"---but you have to punch them in such a way they still land on the table; if you miss your punch, or punch them off the table, that's a failure.

Or, how about "Five Way Stick":

Initiate: When fighting with a Martial Stick (d6, Bulky) stack 5d6 in front of you and try to flick the top die from the stack. If any other than the top tie fall, fail and treat the roll as 1. Continue down the stack until you fail or choose to stop.

These are:

Functional subsystems (clear resolution mechanics);

Thematically appropriate to fiction they are meant to represent (little minigames of player dexterity to resolve character actions involving martial arts);

Physical spectacle (at the very least you will be focused on the "roll", if not dodging flying dice);

Goofy as shit (a virtue in itself).

I want to make rules like this.

+++

Today I spent a few hours watching this Alien-abduction themed actual play of Dread, on Smosh. I liked it a lot! More than I thought I would!

(Please don't laugh at me too much for my very vanilla Internet media consumption! I am an old, and very uncool. Today I was watching YouTube between digging up banana corms.)

I almost never watch actual plays, mind you. I tried Critical Role and bounced right off; I have seen maybe two Dimension 20 sessions ever; the last AP series I followed really was HarmonQuest, which was---what, the twenty-teens?

+

Watching the Smosh Dread thing got me wondering:

How often do mechanics / system talk come up in the course of big mainstream actual plays?

I don't mean:

"Pull from the Jenga tower." (simple resolution mechanics); or

"I cast Fireball!" (diegetic, arguably)

But:

"Okay so let's look it up. Fireball is 20ft x 20ft, and *doesn't* set stuff on fire." (non-diegetic rules clarification); or:

"You have four 'Mercury' symbols, and from last round you have the "somebody will betray you" narrative trigger, let's consult the relevant oracle table ..." (complex resolution mechanics)

This analysis by Trilemma of the transcript of a Critical Role episode [and additional commentary by Thomas Manuel] goes a ways towards answering how much general rules talk occurs, though it doesn't make a distinction between the types of rules talk in the sense I'm thinking of.

+

Here's a (totally untested) hypothesis:

If actual plays are edited / watched for the uninterrupted flow of action / banter / emotion at the table (as ones geared towards general, non-TTRPG-enthusiast audiences like Smosh and HarmonQuest certainly are);

and:

If certain kinds of complex mechanics tend to divert attention into cul-de-sacs of meta-narrative detail, interrupting said flow of action / banter / emotion (these are generally absent from the APs I can sit through, or at least edited out);

then:

The games that work best for actual play are basically party games, with light and (more importantly, for this post) VISCERAL resolution mechanics:

Jenga-d suspense;

The sleep rituals in stuff like Werewolf;

An overdramatic rock-paper-scissors game; etc

Or, alternatively, they are games whose systems can get out of the way enough to function like party games. I'd argue that D&D counts as one such game. It is go-to mainstream TTRPG actual play system because yes, of Name Brand Recognition---

But also because it is possible to not play with any actual D&D rules (and therefore avoid the tedium of looking up what stuff like Conditions mean) and still be playing D&D culturally.

+

Basically:

How suitable a tabletop roleplaying game is for actual play depends on how easily its mechanics can function as bits or performances, in the improv sense.

+++

So this is very shaky ground for me; I don't watch actual plays and I am talking out my ass. But through the sewage of my bullshit is perhaps the firmer ground of a design opportunity, maybe?

Namely:

Could we be designing TTRPG mechanics as performances / for performativity?

+

I'd argue that Dread is so well-known because its simple core mechanic is a novel for precisely this reason: you and your friends enact your suspense around the Jenga Tower physically and viscerally (even if it is anxious silence), for each other (if not for an outside audience).

There is the sense that you are acting. Doing something.

+

How else could we manage this?

Rolling dice or revealing a card are already performances, technically---but for our purposes here I'd argue that they are very "small"; they don't have enough presence.

How can we treat dice rolls with the pomp of ritual, construct more ceremony around a card-based resolution system?

Boardgames are already good at fun counters and tactile props and click-y dials---but these are also small, in that they live mainly on the table. You are still sitting on your ass.

Props that make you get up! Rulesets that necessitate play-fighting!

LARP totally fits. Throwing pouches and yelling "Magic Missile! Magic Missile!" 10 out of 10 no notes.

+

Finger games (rock paper scissors; lat ta li lat ta li tam pong; thumb war) fit.

A chase scene in fiction resolved by a game of tag is maybe too on the nose, but also fits.

+

I've been trying to find this blogpost I vaguely recall, that proposes exactly the kind of thing I'm thinking about.

It suggested a list of unusual fighting styles (or maybe martial arts) for D&D. It has stuck in the substrate of my mind because the proposed fighting styles all had non-standard, action-based resolution mechanics.

Ie: the GM tosses a handful of dice; you (the player) try to punch as many of them in mid-air with your fists; how many you get determines how many hits you score in fiction.

Something like that. Imagine that goofy shit at the table!

I can't find this post any more. Does anybody else remember something like it? Help! I want to find it again!

+++

[rallamajoop]

Hi! I saw your analysis posts about the Lords of RE8, and I am absolutely in love! The early concept of the Duke as the fifth Lord always fascinated me, especially since I wonder what "motif" there could have been in term of horror for him. I mean, the other lords all answer obvious archetypes and that ever since their concept art (vampire, werewolf, Frankenstein, ghost). I wonder what would have been the plans with the Duke and his early, more zombified-like version... What d'you think?

Well, as I've said before, I don't think there's much to suggest the Duke was ever meant to be "the fifth lord" in the sense of having his own domain or a big boss battle, or however else you're thinking here. He doesn't appear alongside the other lords in any of the early concepts for Ethan's trial, and all the lords' iconography is big on square corners and blocks in a way that really wouldn't work with a fifth entry. All we've even got to go on to tell us he was ever meant to be a lord at all is a single line attached to one piece of concept art (below). I don't even see him as looking all that much more zombified there ‒ it's just a sketchy art style.

My guess, FWIW, would be the Duke was always going to be Ethan's ally/shopkeeper, but with some late-game reveal that he was a (deposed? former?) member of the lords as an explanation for his implied powers and connection to the village. But the Duke doesn't need to be explained for the story to work, which may be why the 'fifth lord' idea was ultimately dropped.

If you really want to dig into fairy tale archtypes though, there's an obvious one that already corresponds to the Duke, with his horse and carriage ‒ and that's the old, wandering fortuneteller. Typically this would be a Romani woman (although I don't imagine she'd be called 'Romani' in any authentic fairytale), and our hero would more likely be trading money or favours for advice rather than treasure for weapon upgrades, but the Duke fits the bill otherwise.

In fact, as I mentioned in my post on some of the game's unused assets, the Duke actually has a number of unused voice lines that seem to relate to him selling Ethan more information (“You won’t come across this information just anywhere,” “A little bird whispered this to me,” and “Not to presume, but some advice if I may.”) ‒ possibly treasure photos or hints to significant locations.

Fortunetellers and other folk who offer cryptic-yet-vital advice are a regular feature in horror stories too, not just fairy tales. If offended, their role can easily overlap into that of 'witch', for greater monster cred. But for my money, the Duke himself doesn't come across as the easily offended type, so expanding his role into 'monster' might be reaching.

Alternately, you could also look at the villainous Masked Duke from the Shadow of Rose DLC. I doubt he much resembles any authentic 'original' plan for the character, and he's very much his own entity, but he's certainly an effective villain.

(Though if neither of those work for you, given the Duke's size and association with food, 'literal giant who eats people' might also be a fairytale archtype that could fit.)

All that said, I do wonder just a little if there was ever a plan for the Duke to have a proper villain-reveal moment, when you learn he's the fifth lord. I have this whole semi-developed theory that the Duke is actually working on Miranda's direction for most of the game we all played: after all, she seems to want Ethan to destroy her 'false children', and it's the Duke who sets him on the path to do that (with some input from the old hag, our other cackling-fortuneteller-character). It's only once Ethan wakes up in the Duke's carriage at the very end that he unambiguously picks a side against Miranda. After all, even if he was always privately rooting for Ethan, why stick his neck out for a man who might not even survive the day? That's just not good business.

But even if the Duke wasn't working for Miranda from the start, how much do we really know about his motives? It's far too easy to read his eagerness to buy the crystalised remains of mould-infected individuals as the stuff of war profiteering. How much would the additional remains of Miranda, and even Ethan, be worth to him? And these are hardly the only possibilities for what he could really be after!

In short, I would actually love to see more villainous takes on the Duke. Don't get me wrong ‒ I do love that a character as shady as him doesn't turn out to have been Evil All Along, but he's still sinister enough that I'm intrigued by AU possibilities where he has his own twisted plans for Ethan all along, whether as part of Miranda's scheme or all his own. There's stuff you could do here, I'm just saying!

One one final note, people have suggested the owl crest you can see in the background of his shop and the carpet of his carriage was intended to be the crest of his house, and that seems broadly plausible (more on that & translations in my post on everything we do know about the village lords). While I'm at it, have some high-res versions of both from the game assets.

I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that an owl represents wisdom, or how that tracks with his role as a source of information for Ethan either.

Does it actually look like the crests of the other lords, though?

Eh, a little? You'd have to do some heavy reworks to make it fit in a diamond like all the others. As for overall shape, you could even say it bears more resemblance to Miranda's crest.

Does that mean anything? Eh, if you want it to. Who knows?

(I am also going to nitpick you just a little and say that none of the lords was ever a werewolf. The werewolves are the werewolves, the missing lord in your list would be Moreau as the hunchback or swamp monster. We really don't need anyone else thinking Heisenberg is a lycan, that's really getting tired.)

[krissiefox]

Lamentum (Review) (Xbox One)

Lamentum is an indie survival horror game developed by a team called Obscure Tales. In it you play as a man named Victor, trying to find a cure for his ill wife Allisa. In desperation, the couple heads to Grau Hill seeking aid from a strange Earl.

If you've ever played survival horror classics like Resident Evil, you should feel right at home with this game. It contained all my favorite tropes from those great old 90s horror games on the Psone, - save rooms, puzzles, secret areas, boss fights, inventory management, different story paths, the works! - and it's all presented in a wonderful pixel art style. The art and animation is fantastic.

The story is a pretty heavy one, especially for anyone who's ever had to worry about the health problems of a loved. This helps makes Victor a very sympathetic protagonist and made me want to see a happy ending for him and Allisa. Beating the game, I've found the game seems to have 4 different endings, two of which I've discovered so far - not very happy ones. I'm hoping if I dig deeper I can find more happy outcomes for the couple!

The game's sound design is wonderful as well. The monsters make lots of nasty and disgusting sounds, the soundtrack is haunting and beautiful, and the ambience is well done too.

The only complaint I have for the game is that, at-least in the build I played on Xbox One, there were some rough bugs - including a bathroom mirror at one point that can freeze your game if you examine it. I've actually gotten in touch with the Devs about bugs during my play-through, and they were very helpful and responsive, so kudos the Dev team for that! Hope they can get all the little bugs ironed out in time.

This awesome horror game comes highly recommended from me, you can get it on Xbox one, the PlayStation store and nintendo switch. Even better, you can get it DRM free for PC at good old games! If you love spooky games, please give this one a go!

BONUS!

I just found out there's an old kickstarter demo available of a much earlier version of the game, too! I'll have to try that, it will be neat to see all the differences. :0

[flowersandbirdsflyingfree]

match up submission yayy this took me an hour to type

I am 19 year old person (yes i’m a they/them, unfortunately /j) and I have dyed black hair. I plan to dye it again in the future, either red or blonde, maybe green. I have eight piercings in total, those being snake bites, a bridge piercing, a septum, and two lobes on each ear. I’m planning on getting an industrial piercing and maybe a tongue piercing. I have no tattoos because if I did wanna get one, I wouldn’t know what to get. I’m 5’10 and have a pudgy body type. As for hobbies, I’m a cosplayer and an artist mainly. I’m trying to get back into writing but so far no luck. I wear a mix of emo and mall goth fashion, and I REALLY like industrial music, some other genres but mainly industrial. I like watching tv, mainly cartoons from the 90’s and 2000’s, i would list my favourites but A) You would see a pattern and B) Most of them are really popular. I like collecting albums, the most recent in my collection being Pretty Hate Machine by Nine Inch Nails. I LOVE Postal, but some other video games I like are Team Fortress 2, Dead Rising, Most Sega IPs (mainly Jet Set Radio and Sonic) and Ape Escape. I am also autistic and have a lot more obscure special interests. I’m also Australian so whoever I get matched up with better get used to my annoying ass accent. I’m also a Taurus and I don’t know my MBTI at the moment. And that’s pretty much it!! Have a great holidays everyone!!

(I gave you so muck to work with I’m sorry 😭😭)

I am giving you your long awaited Dude for your hard earned work! I hope you had a wonderful holiday season!

Your Postal Dude is��

Postal 1 Dude

He digs your style right off the bat. He's a huge industrial head himself, often showing off his CDs and vinyl collection to you. In terms of music taste, industrial bands range from Nine Inch Nails, Chemlab and Acumen Nation to something like Terrorfakt or Unter Null. It depends on his mood.

Your accent has a charming drawl to it. He thinks it’s very attractive. He feels insecure of his voice sounding too guttural and grating , so he knows how it feels to be conscious about it. “Don’t beat yourself up. You’ve got more charm than you realize.”

Dude would 100 percent be supportive of your own industrial music should you choose to actively pursue it. He emails you a bunch of movie clips that you could use as samples.

He’s a bit jealous you can create art so wonderfully crafted. Dude tries to express himself but he feels his writing is too edgy or that his drawings are too juvenile.

It’d take some serious convincing to ever get him to cosplay anything. But he would try for you if you found something that’d match his vibe. Otherwise, you got yourself a security guard for conventions while you have fun cosplaying.

During one of his thousand yard stare episodes, you help him relax by holding his hand during the discomfort. Over time, he slowly grows more comfortable with holding onto you. Be careful: he has a tough enough grip to hug the stuffing out of you

Dude is happy to surprise you with a few records/CDs as a gift! He loves Nine Inch Nails. If he wasn’t so crowd sensitive, he would have loved to see them live with you. He also would gift your own weapon since you’re his partner in crime against evil.

He likes putting on your favorite cartoons as background noise. They have cracked a few chuckles out of him. Seeing them make you happy is a simple joy he appreciates. Courage the Cowardly Dog would be a guilty pleasure cartoon of his.

[kogetaikid]

A False Awakening is a phenomenon where one thinks they've just woken up when they're clearly still dreaming

Sup guys, gals and nonbinary pals! Feel free to call me KogetaiKid, Kogetai or Kiddo!!!

ALT/OC BLOG (Not in use at the moment.)

MY DEVIANTART MY YOUTUBE MY BLUESKY

🎈100 Follower Special!!! :3🥳

I'm currently NOT taking any art requests at the moment.

-she/her; 🩷💛🩵pansexual🩵💛🩷

-Time Zone: PST/PDT

-minor.

-Only child (and I fucking HATE IT)

-Makes dark poetry every few 10 pm at nights (publishes in the morning)

-I like Anxiety from Inside out two and Perseverance soul form Undertale :)

-Diagnosed Neurodivergent (Got that autism ✨D R I P ✨)

-Interacial

-Nihilist

-Psychology nerd

-Cross Country Athlete

-Very cynical

-No DNI, but will block anyone who makes me feel uncomfortable.

-I post both fanart and original art

-Self taught artist/writer (currently working (and possibly failing) on multiple projects)

SOME OC REFERENCES

(Not like anyone will care, but good to have them anyways)

EPIC CLUB MAIN CAST!!!

Kogetai D!0X!D3: TR!0X!D3 and X3’3N (Prologue-Chapter 3) Web Hell: Enera (Modern Utopia) IMLS Chronicles: Darla My Snowy Orphanage: Main Cast EPIC CLUB: Main Cast/Epicland Orphans

WEBCOMIC STAND

D!0X!D3 HAS OFFICIALLY MOVED TO DEVIANTART

D!0X!D3: Prologue 1 D!0X!D3: Prologue 2 D!0X!D3: Prologue 3 D!0X!D3: Prolouge 4 D!0X!D3: Prologue 5 D!0X!D3: Abandonment; Part 1 D!0X!D3: Abandonment; Part 2 ILMS: Just Like Mel; Part 1 ILMS: Just Like Mel; Part 2 ILMS: Just Like Mel; Part 3

Epiccc Storiez!!

ILMS Chronicles: Yahaira's story ILMS Chronicles: 4/22/** ILMS Chronicles: Out In Nature ILMS Chronicles: Watching the Sunset

WRITING (Also EPICCC!!!!)

Sunrise Heights An Insect Before Its Death Contemplation Compilation Accidental ILMS Lore The Thirst for Cheap Dopamine (Not) Red

epicness gaLORE!

Epicland Studies #1: Universal Ketakomian Beliefs

*Y don’t ‘cha see what ur gonna see in the future? (READ PROJECT DESC)*

TUMBLR OC MAKING CHALLENGES!!!

(My greatest success of getting something that was my own idea popular!)

LUNA

EPIC CLUB (Main Project)

(TLDR: Some alien lore shit that involves goofy ahh aliens, goofy ahh adventures and trying to avoid nihilism)

No one knows how they've got here, but they have. In the middle of the universe in the andromeda galaxy, in a planet called Epicland. exist the color spirits to fight evil and bring colors to the world. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, purple and gray. (Andris, Lorgzee, Kedmile, Yodion, Imimika, Sotti, Zaxregea, and Enieu) One day, the red spirit wanted to become human-like. What happens next

…

Gray skin, red eyes, what the hell am I...?

Andris, now a nine year old girl named Melody Ren Cohen, nothing much to say about her. Unless she was able to meet up again with someone, who might've been, a secret true sister...

DIOX!D3 (On hiatus; pronounced "Dioxide”):

D!0X!D3 (pronounced “Dioxide”): ANARCHY AGAINST CONTROL. On an alien planet called Epicland, and abandoned child called Melanie gets adopted into an anarchist society called Syr-Ko’s Children Anarchist Society! (SKCAS for short). No adults allowed, you get kicked out when you’re 30. In this society, children run the game, with a plan to eliminate the ones who control us and make their world r0b0t!c. You’d wonder to yourself:

WH0’S THAT L!TTL3 R0B0T FR3!ND 0F Y0URS, K!DS?!

I Love My Sister Chronicles (Secondary Project)

(It's honestly more like a saga, but it wasn't until a few days ago that I remembered that word...)

Dreams are weird, especially when two simple hours could sometimes feel like an entire lifetime. April 22, 20**: A girl named Yahaira falls victim to this unfortunate phenomenon, thus creating me, us, everyone. In my early years, I always wanted a sister, but the never happened. My mom always says she wanted two girls. I tell her she ended up with me instead; an amalgamate of what could've been her two girls.

As I entered my teenage years I noticed something very off about the world, so very unreal, and I start to become lucid in this dream world.

I remember that I'm someone's little sister. Melody's little sister, Yahaira. I'm now piecing together the complicated puzzle of who I was, who Melody was, and what happened before I entered this dream. The first and most important thing I keep in mind:

I LOVE MY SISTER

(Coming "Soon")

VQ895

Welcome to LABORATORY! Here, many fusions of multiple organisms for all over galaxies called hybrids live. To these hybrids, Laboratory is the entire world for them, but to a hybrid named Vertā Quantin (half Artificially Made Human, half Wolfcat) unveils this lie. But it could it be…

SHE WAS NOT THE ONLY ONE?!

WEB HELL (TW: Dark humor)

8/5/2255 - The World Covered in Screens.

“WELCOME TO MODERN UTOPIA! THE MOST GYATT OHIO MEGATRONIC THEY/THEM UWU PLACE IN DA WORLD!!!!!!!! MY NAME IS FINLEY (they/them, if u m!$g3ñd3r u a h8 cr!mer)”

“T0DAY, HERE ARE [[10!]] REASONS Y U LOVE MORDEN UTOPIA!!!! :):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)(( “

…

In this world, you only have an illusion of humanity. You only have an illusion of decision, an illusion of freedom, an illusion of bargaining, an illusion of friends, an illusion of creativity, diluted by algorithm. You can’t escape, there’s no need to escape. YOU LOVE IT HERE…

One-off projects (coming soon):

My Snowy Orphanage: A VHS horror about a group of cartoon kids teaching children to kill.

A Very Necessary Story On A Very Lonely Kid: Born 4/23/1999. A young boy named Brayden Mendez. No friends, no sibling, Brayden hasn’t meet anyone besides his parents until kindergarten. Isolated from humanity, he’s left to rot in his loneliness until he finally breaks.

And even his afterlife doesn’t spark a friend.

There are a few more in the making, but that’s all for now :)

[cutpaperbleedswater]

In the mirror is the reflection of a dead man walking

He’s rushing around looking for that one item his daughter just has to have in her bag. A simple dark green bag with dandelions he painted himself, branding her indirectly as theirs. This time the formerly mentioned item is a hair brush. 

“Daad, I know I don’t have curly hair like you but I did inherit the thickness, it’s going to be windy today, I need my hair brush.” 

So now she’s probably stood by the door, tapping her foot in the floor, arms crossed, waiting for him, because the walk upstairs would ‘ruin her shoes’. 

Though anyone who has ever met him couldn’t even lie saying he’s a quiet walker, he manages to acquire the hairbrush from her room without disturbing the shadows that flee at the slightest movement. He carefully twisted the doorknob and pushed the door open, with precision owed to his art. 

When he arrives back downstairs, he holds out the hairbrush and his daughter flies into him, wrapping her arms around him, initiating a hug he returns before lightly tapping her shoulder to say it’s time to go. Katniss smiles at him and kisses him on the cheek before herding their children out of the door, leaving him alone, like every morning. He dreams of the day both his son and daughter are old enough to walk themselves so he can have just that bit more time with Katniss. 

Sighing, he begins his loud pursuit up the stairs with the intention of perhaps having a shower, grabbing his clothes from their bedroom. He steps into their en-suite and promptly stumbles back. Looking back at him is a man dead and gone a good 25 years ago at the very least.

Frantic blue eyes whiz back and forth across the mirror, he watched the pupils bounce backward and forward until his head starts to spin. He frantically looks up to his hair, a slightly darker blonde, with looser curls that only add to the image of his father. The kindness and vibrancy in his eyes, the well rounded jaw-line, soft face. Even to him, his neck is the same. Then a blink.  This time he does fall back. His father. He is the carbon copy of a dead man. Overtime the initial boyness of his appearance has been chipped away, revealing someone he likes to think looks more stable. In his childhood he remembers the comments everyone made about the Mellark boys’ strong genes, he felt proud, happy to feel included, but now he just feels despair. Only one of those four are alive and that’s him, the one who still marvels about how he still breathes. He remembers people saying him and his older, but not oldest, brother could pull off being twins. And then the very rare old person stopping him in the street to say he looked exactly like his father at whatever age it was. Now no one needs to tell him (the ones that would anyway are nearly all dead) that. At the sight, despair pools in his lungs, coating his insides with it. 

After years, going on decades, he finally wonders if his father would be proud of the person his son is. He likes to think he would; he continues the legacy of being a generous tradesman, his kindness still digs under peoples skin, he doesn’t normally let out frustration by means of violence on anything other than kneading the dough a bit aggressively. He’s an active figure in his children’s lives, they can trust him. He’s finally broken free from the chains of his trauma that held him down, he fought his battles head on. For that, he hopes his father would be proud. He hopes they all would be. Bar his mother, who was anything but in the sense of caring for and nurturing him. 

He shuffles against the door, knees pulled up to his chest, hands in hair, tugging at the greasy curls. Who’s he kidding? Surely not himself. What is there for his father to be proud of? What is left of the son he sent off to the Games? The son turned insane just for doing what’s right. The son who tried to kill his beloved. The son who had lost control of himself at one of the most crucial times.  That’s where Katniss finds him. Small handfuls of his straw blonde hair sat around him. She doesn’t say anything, she doesn’t need to, only pulls him close to her and begins massaging his hands. Tricking them into letting go. She watches the tears flow down his face and her heart pangs but she knows he’ll be okay in a few. He always is. Always.

[kolbisneat]

MONTHLY MEDIA: May 2023

If you notice I haven’t read as much this month, it’s because I got the new Zelda game. But between my vanquishing of evil I still managed to fit in some other media! Here’s how I spent the month of May.

……….FILM……….

BlackBerry (2023) Having grown up in Waterloo Region I didn’t have any interest in seeing a retelling of the story I mostly knew but this was really great! Surprisingly funny and frenetic and a truly unhinged (in the best way) performance from Glenn Howerton. Good stuff.

John Mulaney: Baby J (2023) I naively thought “I wonder how much this’ll touch on the drug stuff?”... turns out it’s all about the drug stuff. Cool that he was talking about it so openly, and made it so funny, but I wonder if there was more material that got cut? He briefly mentions a trip with his son and I would’ve loved to hear more about that. Anyway as a comedy special it’s really great.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023) You know I haven’t been interested in the last few Marvel movies but this one felt like it was going to be different..and it was! So many moving parts but I never had trouble keeping track of character motivations or story beats and the whole thing was really beautiful. I mean even the really gross stuff was fun to watch. Keen to go back and watch this as a trilogy down the road.

The Suicide Squad (2021) I was excited to see Guardians of the Galaxy so at the start of the month I rewatched this. Still impressed at how this can be equal parts a gross out dick joke movie and also built on a foundation of community and family. Builds well, nothing feels repetitive, and the finale doesn’t overstay its welcome. Really great stuff.

……….TELEVISION……….

The Bear (Episode 1.01 to 1.03) Never have I felt so stressed watching television. Really captivating episodes and I’m very excited to watch more.

Ted Lasso (Episode 3.08 to 3.10) Maybe it’s the time away from season 1 and 2, or maybe something happened behind the scenes, but season 3 feels different. Some eps really hit, and even some moments within those other episodes, but it all feels rather unfocused. Maybe it’ll stick the landing but my confidence has been shaken.

The Most Hated Man on the Internet (Episode 1.01 to 1.03) Perfectly paced. Just enough detail to get invested but after 3 eps it felt like I experienced the full journey. Really interested to see the public’s perception of revenge porn shift over time and I can only assume this website (and its founder) played a part in that.

……….YOUTUBE……….

Down the Off-Grid Rabbit Hole... by Maggie Mae Fish Love simultaneously learning about a corner of the internet and also how it’s exploiting others. Just wild. VIDEO

Why so many people need glasses now by Vox Turns out kids need to spend more time outside for legit biological reasons? Who knew. VIDEO

How Nintendo Solved Zelda's Open World Problem by Game Maker’s Toolkit Hey maybe you’ve been playing the new Zelda and if you have, you’ll find this interesting. I sure did. VIDEO

……….READING……….

The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion by Jonathan Haidt (Page 165 of 500) The first time I read this, it really helped me understand the perspective some folks take on divisive topics. There was a sort of comfort to finally seeing what they’re seeing. In rereading this, I find myself getting angered while reading. The book is over 10 years old and while still relevant, it often feels quaint when talking about the widening gap between political parties. Its neutrality feels almost naive to me? Maybe I’ve forgotten a key chapter that helps.

The Fade Out by Ed Brubaker and Sean Phillips (It doesn’t have page numbers...maybe 1/3 of the way through) Murder in old hollywood is just so cool. I’m really digging this so far and the art, characters, and pacing feel thoroughly natural. Every reveal is just so casual cause to these characters, it’s just their lives, and I love that. Big fan so far.

Ultimate Spider-Man Volume 8 by by Brian Michael Bendis, Mark Bagley, and more (Complete) I always liked the smaller stories in this volume that focused on Peter’s personal life...like break-ups and dating other superheroes and stuff. But for some reason the Jean DeWolff/Kingpin/Moon Knight stuff always just felt kinda rushed? I dunno maybe I like everything to be a little more fantastical or suuuuuuper mundane. None of this in-between shenanigans. Give me highschool or give me death.

……….GAMING……….

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (Nintendo) So good. I walked past a house that was redoing their driveway and had a bunch of construction stuff covered in a tarp and I immediately thought “hmm I wonder what I could build” and that...is the sign that I’ve played this game too much. Big fan 10/10 change nothing.

Oz: A Fantasy Role-Playing Setting (Andrews McMeel Publishing) The Mof1 Crew did some downtime planning ahead of a heist/attack combo that worked out pretty well! We played out events in weeks instead of in real time (for both the players and their enemies) and it worked pretty well!

Neverland: A Fantasy Role-Playing Setting (Andrews McMeel Publishing) The group is still navigating a rival adventuring party on the island and seeing what happens now that they’ve let their star-collecting duties slip. Big trouble. You can read about it here.

Anyway that’s it. See you in June!

[kausatstolar]

1-10

Okay, technically sovstuck's been out for a little while, but i've been thinking about it, and figured I may as well preserve my thoughts somewhere than the sovstuck discord. [shout out to you guys fr]! May as well use this blog for something. The prologue can go above the cut.. But the rest of it, not so much. Without further ado, our story begins.

The year is 5023

Not much going on with the text, so it's time to take a nice hard look at the panel! I think it's so fascinating how the planets from the beta kids' session make up this solar system, alongside earth, which-- Once again, appears to be the third planet from the sun. Which.. Is the light symbol. Could be artistic choice, could be literal. Either way, this is a gorgeous piece of art.

The place, Earth C. More colloquially known as AFTERRA.

Afterra... That's fun. Keeps up with naming conventions. Not much to say about this, other than the fact I can't help but notice the second moon...

13 years ago the OLD GODS came back to this world, 5,000 years after its birth, to much fanfare and to much dismay.

Huh. 10 years unaccounted for. S'probably nothing! This is a fun panel to look at, and it's also very fun to see that building's roof resemble one of the can city structures from homestuck proper.

But this story isn't about the Old Gods. And this story isn't about THE CONSTRUCTION, either, nor a new form of it.

points. hey who's that incredibly handsome carapacian in the foreground... [retris's dad!!] once again, this is beautiful to look at. neo kyoto... I haven't yet commented on it, but I love the texture of the prologue panels. Very edible. while The Construction piques my curiosity, this isn't that story.

No, this is a story about a boy, his friends, and a game they play together.

YEAHHHHH RONTIS... His house looks so nice. Goodbye paper texture. Not much to say, but I'm sure excited.

This is a story about you.

WOO. Not much to analyze about the text that's present, but plenty of panel to dig into. it's nice to see him so comfy.. However, his room is a smidge of a disaster. Peeping the 3ds, sure, but also... His clipboard, monster energy, and papers scattered everywhere. Shout out to the aspect wheel by his head, too.

There's a gif of retris at the computer, but it's a smidge too big. Behold page seven on your own. It's just damn pleasant to watch, seeing everyone's signs bounce so pleasingly.. Wait. What's with the iron cancer sign matched with the pieces sign. Hm. I'm sure we'll get there. I also like how the blue of SVURP's spirograph is an exact compliment of SBURB's spirograph.

Your name is RETRIS MORAGE, and you are tired. It's been a long and treacherous 18 MOVES since your OPENING, and 18 minutes since you've woken up from an incredibly long nap that you didn't mean to take. Whoops.

god i envy this very sleepy retris. It is currently 7 pm sharp on a wednesday, and I wish to rest. Not much to note as far as the art of the panel goes for this page! MOVES and OPENING... Chess terms. fun. Wonder if the whole of afterra uses these names, or if it's predominantly carapacian areas only.

The sunlight pours through your windows, unfettered. You take a moment to survey your various possessions as your brain wakes up. The gears of your mind groaned to life as you remembered yourself.

Hey! He's got a portrait of his parents on his nightstand. How sweet of him! And.. Monster energy cans everywhere. Lovely EVA merch too. On the note of the prose, I do quite enjoy it! Smth about the poetry of, "the gears of your mind groaned to life as you remembered yourself" sticks in the mind...

You, like everyone, have a variety of HOBBIES and INTERESTS. Among these are SWORDPLAY, WORDPLAY, and FOREPLAY. Don't think about the last one too hard. Don't think about that phrasing too hard, either. Get your mind out of the gutter. You have an ardent passion for ASTROLOGY and the science of MYTHOLOGICAL ROLES. You run a rather sizeable CHUMBLR blog dedicated to the subject. You wish you didn't. You know in your heart that you are a MAGE OF LIGHT, and are looking forwards to getting this proven to you. Sooner rather than later, hopefully. You're getting ahead of yourself, though.

Helluvah set-up he's got in his room, as far as his computer goes. mars on the back of his computer.. Very fun. Well kept room, aside from the cans and papers.

However, uh. Retris. Retris, what the hell do you mean you're gonna get your status as a mage of light proven to you. Swordplay, wordplay, foreplay.. I guess I'll have to pay a bit more attention to his phrasing, i suppose. Er. Not about the foreplay, let him layabout as it pleases him. Wordplay, however. Curious that Mythological Roles are a science, and that he's gotten too deep into running a tumblr blog about it. Surely that won't come back.

I'll get through the rest of the comic later; i've got things to do. Fascinating to see how it's begun, though. I can't wait to see where this's gonna go.

[subzeroparade]

💌 📡🕯️for the ask game please!

Also might I just say that I love your designs for the Byrgenwerth crew and Laurence, Ludwig, and Micolash in particular??? Your drawing style is absolutely fantastic :D

Thanks for the ask!

🕯️how do you think engaging with each other through tumblr, twitter, comments, kudos, creates healthy fandom experiences? How do you deal with that if you're not a social person/experience social anxiety?

So turns out there’s two candle emojis on this list??? I’m going to choose this one because the answer to the other one is just no and no because I love writing and I’m a meticulous planner lmao. 

I’m pretty low-key irl so engaging with folks over art and writing in fandom in ideal for me. I’m not the type to be vocal on a discord server but I love the time consecrated to looking at other people’s works, indulging in their headcanons, etc. I’m also old enough to know how to curate my own internet experience, and so have never had to deal with any unpleasant fandom drama (10/10 would recommend).

I would like to be better at leaving comments, especially on AO3, where there are some excellent works that are just woefully under-appreciated (probably because of AO3’s more general audience). I’d like to be better at engaging with those works to show my appreciation. 

📡why is writing and sharing your writing important for fandom?

I think it can double as dialogue and creative exchange - so more than just a healthy indulgence. Everyone is chasing that feeling of “ugh this piece of art makes me feel all the things” and I want to try give as much as I get in return.  

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

I have no major working WIPs right now worth sharing tbh, so I took this earlier today as a little prompt/spontaneous writing exercise and extracted a bit from Litanies for 2k words worth of an “extra” scene. 

Title: Foxglove Rating: G Characters: Gehrman & Laurence Wordcount: 2k

Gehrman returns home to find Laurence digging through the dirt.

This will only really make sense for those who've read Litanies. It's extracted from this excerpt, in Gehrman's chapter:

I remember watching from afar, years ago, when he’d been the only soul willing to confirm a theory about the lake at the edge of Byrgenwerth’s grounds. The Prospectors had come across a veritable trove of seals that year, and Willem had begun to wonder if there weren’t perhaps hidden access points to the tombs obscured by the lake itself. No one knew how long the lake had been there or how exactly it had formed. The possibility that flooded passages to burial sites deep in the caves might be discovered and seized upon was suddenly at the forefront of our collective obsession. 

With all the bravado of a modest man with a death wish, he’d volunteered to go below. The scholars had outfitted him head to toe in watertight canvas and rubber, crowned by the diving suit’s great, bobbing head like a primitive carved idol with its single, staring eye. He’d spent twenty minutes walking along the lake bottom, getting as far as the cables allowed. When he re-emerged the scholars had crowded around him excitedly, given him no room to squeeze out of the suit and barely enough room to breathe. Once the glass and steel shell had been pried off his head, he’d only shrugged and told them solemnly that there was, "Nothing but silt, I’m afraid, and bulbous-faced fish with gaping mouths and silly stares, handsomer than the lot of you gawking at me now."

Only one scholar had laughed at that, a glint of copper in the sun. 

I enjoyed the concept so much I ran with a scene from the night before.

Foxglove

Gehrman returns home to find Laurence digging through the dirt.

Home is a generous word for what it is: four walls, some wood and some stone. A hearth in need of sweeping. A table with three working legs and a dubious fourth one. A bed, soft enough for his needs, softer than the hard stone floors of the labyrinths below Byrgenwerth. Outside, a sad little square of soil that doubles as a vegetable patch, where desperate, hardy things occasionally grow. Pails hung by the windows to collect rainwater. A stream for bathing, cluttered by cattails and hidden by high rushes and, past it, the path to the workshops, hard floors he’s made his bed on plenty of nights before. He’d like to sleep in his own bed, tonight. But first he needs to tend to the scholar rooting through his makeshift garden.

He walks up to the door and unlatches it. An old habit, the latch - useless here, deep in the forested paths of the academy grounds. It opens with a groan of protest.  

“I’ll be done in a moment,” comes the voice from the soil patch. Low, distracted, the sound travelling from a face that hasn’t looked up. 

Gehrman lays his overcoat across the back of one of two wooden chairs, pulled close to the hearth. He lights it, slowly, feeding it thin, dry logs at first; then any other detritus still lingering in his four square walls that he can afford to give up. Bones, most often, or scraps of parchment. A garment too worn to repair, or the nettle that grows insistently over the back windows of the little homestead. It reeks of something sharp and brackish when it burns. 

The floors are covered in the pelts of things he’s hunted on the outskirts of the grounds - beavers, mostly, though a fox or two and even a sable marten, which he’d used to make trimmings on Maria’s gloves and hat late last winter. A single wolf pelt is lain out by the fire - a beast separated from its pack, driven mad as much by starvation as by solitude. On an amber autumn night it had tried to take a student, and met its end in the muzzle of Gehrman’s pistol. He’d managed to save everything but its head. He does the tanning in the workshops to avoid the overwhelming stink from settling in his cottage for good.

Instead, the claustrophobic space smells like his little assortment of vices - poppy resin and tobacco, mainly; with notes of a bright, floral gin, which he’d been told was odourless but was certainly not. It tastes like red peppercorns and berries, with a hint of copper, laced with regret. 

He takes his pipe and tobacco pouch and steps outside into the fading light. Rounding the side of the cottage he treads across verdant, mossy things that release fragrant evidence of their decay. A few mushrooms pop their smooth, capped heads alluringly from the soil, a flash of white like bare flesh against black robes. Not edible, Maria had told him once. Not if you want to see tomorrow. He’d laughed, and she’d looked at him strangely. Gallows humour, he came to learn, made little sense to her.

Sidling up beside Laurence, he watches the last of the afternoon’s fading light travel down the scholar’s back. The anatomist’s knees are planted squarely in the dirt, legs folded under him. His sleeves are rolled up, white cuffs stained around the edges, and his suspenders hanging loosely in the dirt around his waist. He’s left his robes hanging by the door, in the same place where Gehrman hangs the nets of nettle and flax for catching fish in the generous stream nearby. He’s long since ceased trying to weave or patch them himself; not since Laurence began to do it for him with the quick, deft fingers of a surgeon used to sewing more than just plant fibres.

Laurence cuts and gathers the leaves and stems with the kind of methodical boredom of a practised hand. Not for the first time Gehrman wants to chase off the other man, to berate him for laying claim to what isn’t his, a clever little wild animal always rooting around for something more. Always taking, this creature of appetite.

Instead he knocks old cinders from his pipe and pats down the fresh mixture before charring the top. The tobacco is sweet, the quality fair - a rare indulgence he’s allowed himself. He doesn’t mind the telltale bitterness of poppy resin laced through it, the way it settles in his mouth after each breath. The hiss of the match fills the silence between them. He takes a few sips before speaking. 

“Does Maria know you’re here?”

He watches Laurence place the leaves meticulously in the square of his neckerchief, laid out in the dirt beside him. The red silk, wet at the edges, gleams like a pomegranate.

“No. I’ll thank her for these later.”

Gehrman does little for the soil patch himself. Maria cultivates it, when she comes around: her own private garden, her own little research supply. When Laurence comes he only takes from it, as he does with everything else around him. And Gehrman, patient as the white cliffs whittled away by the sea over aeons, does not stop him. 

He tamps the tobacco and relights the pipe. When he exhales, the smoke curls invitingly into the darkening air. “I’ve decided I’ll do it.”

Laurence stops and looks up at him. The soil under his fingernails hides the ever-present ink stains.

“The suit looks steady enough,” Gehrman continues, under the weight of his gaze.“Watertight, the scholars told me, and reinforced with canvas. The helmet can withstand pressure much greater than the lake’s bottom.” 

“I know,” Laurence replies, turning back to the dirt. He lays marigold across the silk neckerchief. “I checked with the scholars myself.”

“You don’t sound convinced.”

“Because I don’t trust it.” He tucks a strand of hair behind his ears with dirty fingers. “It’s a thing made by men. It’s fallible.”

Gehrman coughs through a smile. “But you trust the blades I sharpen in the workshop to keep you alive.”

Laurence brushes soil from a long, spindly valerian root. “A blade can kill a monster. It can’t defend against a lake.”

“No one else will go below.”

The scholar shrugs. “I’m sure they can find another fool with a death wish.”

 “Would you go?” Gehrman allows himself to press, chewing absentmindedly on the end of his pipe. “You want to know, don’t you? If there are more passages down there. Hidden ways into the tombs.”

Laurence opens his mouth, then closes it. Gehrman studies his expression, familiar enough after so many years of companionship. There’s something watchful about it - not animal wariness, but a sort of jaded watchfulness that speaks to a hurried, instinctive rush to action, held in check by the burden of consequence. He gathers some chickweed leaves gently in both hands and places them to the side before leaning back on his heels.

“I tried to talk Willem out of it, you know. But he wouldn’t hear me.” Something drifts languidly between them, long and iridescent, like a dragonfly. “Truthfully, I can’t understand why he still searches for seals. It’s been years. Eventually we will need to do something with the labyrinth relics. We’ve a cabinet of curiosities from the depths and very little practical research to show for it.”

“This will double my wages for the month,” Gehrman blurts. 

“A great consolation when you’re dead, I’m sure.”

Keep the garden in my absence, he wants to retort, but he doesn’t have the stomach for it now. The tombs took his father, and the tombs will take him. What use in pretending otherwise?

Laurence shifts on his knees, looks up at him through the last muted rays of daylight. Silently Gehrman refills the oil in the lantern that hangs from the roof’s shallow awning. The warm light ignites the copper in the scholar’s hair. 

Laurence plunges his hands back into the dirt, gaze focused on the vivid, bell-like blossoms of foxglove. “Who’s to accompany me on labyrinth expeditions, if you’re gone? Maria? She would push me down a well if no one were looking.”

“She would,” Gehrman concedes, his smile weary at the edges. “But you handled yourself well enough with a torch last time, if memory serves.”

Laurence scoffs at that, a disgruntled sound that matches his expression. They’d been separated for the first time, Gehrman remembers; someone had failed to leave the proper markers and they’d circled back, lost in the gloom, torches burning low. Gehrman had heard the scholars cry out in the same heartbeat he heard the bell - that malign silver sound he dreads on every descent. When he’d finally found them in the blackness they were at the mercy of a rat, all teeth and sinew and madness in its mouth - and Laurence, waving a torch with the kind of dogged indignation of a man who rebukes the reaper because he’s otherwise occupied.  

“Well enough that I almost set fire to the lot of us.” Laurence grabs a fistful of his own hair as if to make his point, cut just below his jaw, shorter than Gehrman ever remembers seeing it. 

“Aye.” The nauseating reek of burnt hair had made the rest of the blackened tunnels smell almost agreeable. 

He inhales deeply, tries to keep the taste of resin on his tongue. The foxglove blossoms look soft and inviting enough to caress in the pleasant glow. Laurence begins to fold the scarlet neckerchief on itself, carefully making sure not to crush the little trove of leaves and stems, delicate as vellum. Then, like an afterthought, he plucks a few leaves of mint and slips them into his sleeve.  

“Twenty minutes,” Gehrman says into the quiet hum of twilight. “Enough time to see what’s down there. No more.” 

Laurence looks at him with all the frankness of a fist to the face. “More than enough time to drown.”

Gehrman ignores this. “He’s looking for a Great One, isn’t he? Willem, I mean. Weren’t you the one to tell me water is a channel through which to commune?”

“It’s only a theory.” Laurence pulls his suspenders back over his shoulders and gathers the little bundle of silk in one hand. He extends the other to Gehrman. “And I sincerely doubt you’ll find a Great One waiting for you at the bottom of the lake.” 

Gehrman takes his hand and pulls the smaller man to his feet. “What if I do? I’ve heard it said the gods are merciful, if you can get their attention. Sympathetic, or suchlike, to our dull little existence.”

“Gods help me, Gehrman, do you believe every fanciful thing scholars tell you?” 

Gehrman’s chuckle rolls from his throat in thick puffs of smoke. “Only the ones I hear from you.” He lets go of Laurence and removes his hat, brushes the wild tufts of hair back from his cheeks and forehead, then puts the hat back on. “Will you come in and have a drink to my last night on earth?”

He watches Laurence chew the edge of a mint leaf thoughtfully. He turns away to spit the leftovers, then wipes the flecks of green from his mouth. His fingers linger over his lips. 

“Can I talk you out of it?”

“No, silver tongue. You can let me smoke my pipe in blessed silence." Laurence flashes a smile. The tight one, the one that shows his chagrin at the corners. Then he reaches into his trouser pockets and pulls out two coins. Gehrman catches their surface only faintly in the dim firelight. Old Yharnam silvers, from the looks of them. 

Without a word, Laurence takes Gehrman’s hand, lays the coins in his palm and closes his fingers. His expression doesn’t change. 

“If something happens, I won’t be the one to bury you.”

Gehrman makes his own face very still so that Laurence will not see the bitterness there. But Laurence only ever sees what he wants to see.

“And if you don’t drown, you can use them to buy something other than that vile gin you insist on serving me.” 

Gehrman dims the lantern and lets the night air chase the spectre of death from his face. 

“Come inside.” 

[charlieslowartsies]

Would you mind giving me a director’s commentary on Finding Freddy? I was curious why you didn’t like that one as much.

I know I've mentioned it in passing before but yeh sure. It's a personal tale tho, not much fun haha

Finding Freddy was a strange beast for me. I went into it wanting to pull the story away from being centered around Mike and the OG 4, wanting to explore the world thru the kga lens better. I shoved the timeline 9 years.

Okay. I brought in Danny, since he was the logical choice of who Mike would trust and who I thought me and the readers would enjoy. I brought in Springtrap as a good guy, separating him from William Afton while still making it clear that wasn't going to last long, but that Springy was someone we should sympathize or even empathize with. I wanted a story of fear of the unknown.

Ghost Strings was about loss and grief. Finding Freddy was going to be about finding oneself in the darkness and being afraid of what's inside you, but also what's behind you too.

And a finger on the monkey's paw curled lmao.

At the same time, in my real life, I was in the process of moving from my childhood home. I'd lived there for about 25 years, and though old and spooky and occasionally grouchy it was a wonderful house for a kid. The joint was full of nooks, crannies, two basements, (respectively titled the Old Basement and the New Basement, despite New Basement being 25 years old in 1993 when I came along, that was just it's name by then.) It had ghosts in every corner, stairs that creaked in unison on dark nights, about 2 dozen mice and it was safe and warm and familiar to me as my own bones.

For those that know the stories well, you can see where the restaurant's descriptions came from, especially in the opening of Finding Freddy.

Well, I wrote myself right into a corner, uncertain where I wanted Danny and Mike's future to head. Danny died in a few renditions. Mike died in others. Killing them off seemed like surrendering something I didn't want to give. I stalled out on the story. We moved into our new build around June 2017, FF had begun in Feb of that year. My golden Joey died around April, he was older and it was a relief because we worried the move would stress him out. Herbie, my graduation gift in 2015, filled out and completed his training and took a lot of my spare time that art wasn't getting.

Standing in my empty room the day I dropped the keys off, which had not been empty since...forever...it ended up leaving a deeper wound that I refused to address. I called myself silly, sentimental, I shrugged. I was being stupid.

It found a way out, though, because our troubles always do.

FF languished in the word doc. I started BATIM/Make Believe around then. The FNAF games weren't as fun for me as they used to be. I loved the new house, I was so so grateful that my folks gave me the second floor of our cape cod. I cooked with my mom in a big, new kitchen with appliances that worked and breakers that didn't trip. I took care of my father and his health issues. I explored the acres of woods we moved onto.

My rabbit I had through college died the following March. Hiccup. Old time readers know that Bonnie's loyal and sometimes snotty personality came directly from Hiccup.

I subbed for my mom's school, and Hiccup died one day before I started a two month job. I wanted out of it for the first few days, I wanted time to grieve. I wasn't given it. I didn't ask, my mom refused me. "You made a promise to work there. You made a commitment."

I didn't fight her. She was right. It was just a silly pet rabbit. The world shouldn't stop for me, for something trivial. I had no energy to do free lance work, and less energy to write for a fic I couldn't enjoy.

Turns out, living with Hiccup for so many years meant I slept to his background presence. His lil bunny sounds, monching hay and digging about in his cage and cannonballing my bed in the morning to greet me.

His ambience was gone, and for 3 months I got about 3-4 hours of sleep a night until I realized the problem.

FF started to rot. Another Five Nights was tended to, sometimes. More fics worked on. FF ignored. I felt so bad. I felt tired, angry, annoyed. I missed Mike. I felt I was writing Danny all wrong. I missed the Marionette. I wondered if I had taken Springtrap from the plot too early. I questioned Afton's motives. I questioned my motives.

I missed my childhood home. I missed college. I missed going to classes and having tons of work and dreaming of being an illustrator and getting paid to do what I loved. I missed having a life for myself.

Danny was trapped in the underground. I was trapped up on the third floor, feeling like Rapunzel in her tower. (When will my life begin?)

Danny became that mouthpiece for me. If nothing else, I learned more what Danny Fitzgerald wanted, even if I didn't show it until later stories.

Finally, finally, I pulled my shit together and updated the fic. 2020. Not as long as I've let other stories sit in purgatory, but for some reason with KGA it felt more personal to me. It hurt more. I was pretty pleased with myself for pushing onward. I had concurred this dragon, I was proud of myself.

And then I got a review that asked why I had taken 2 years to update. Nothing else in that comment.

I also received other kinder comments too, but in that one moment I remember sitting there and thinking 'wow, okay. Why am I bothering with this again? Why is this hobby draining me and why am I letting it?' All I saw was the negative in that situation, which was wrong of me.

It was a lesson I needed to learn. Write for yourself. Write what you want. Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead.

I was able to justify bringing Marion back when I saw Lefty in Pizza Sim. I was able to bring in Mangle and explain Mike's survival because she protected him. Springtrap and Afton were given an escape so they could go ahead and set up plot for Last Shift. (And then in Lies Within, too.) The Michael Afton/Michael Schmidt theory was yanked until I had two Michael's to work with. Hiccup was further immortalized into Scraptrap. Max Afton was so much fun to create and write.

But Finding Freddy never quite lived up to my expectations.

I never lived up to my expectations for the story. It was a lot of things that culminated in me carrying a grudge for the fic.

I don't really carry it heavy as I used to, time heals all wounds. But it's the problem child of the series for me. London Bridge is old and the gang wasn't realized. I could excuse LB not being a good read, but at the time I liked writing it. Devil's Spine was fun, but perhaps shouldn't have been a prequel. That was okay, because it set a lot of building blocks. And DS lead to Ghost Strings, which I loved working on.

FF I didn't like writing, and nothing excuses it. It became a chore and I felt forced to write.

But the one thing I do like about it, is that I did finish it. And that did feel good.

[residentdormouse]

Hey, hi! You are on my BINGO card (like last year haha) and I was wondering if you could tell me literally whatever you can muster about Hayden and/or Stephanie (what they did before the world went to shit, their interests, hobbies, their personality, style, quotes, lyrics, colors relating to them, etc.)

Thank you so much and also eternally thankful to you for all the comments you left on Save a Prayer - I saw them and they made me really happy ❤

Hey there 👋 (and I'm still eternally grateful for last year; that gif makes me so rediculously happy.)

Most information on the 'Jumping to Wonderland' series can be found on this main post - questions/asks/playlists are towards the bottom. Granted, most of that is for Hayden (she has a full 101k story to herself before Steph and my others OCs really join in with Diving.) The best segments for her are: General History and Interview Questions.

But that's a lot of nonsense to dig through. More consise answers:

Hayden (Hadley) Flynn

Hadley worked for an organization that was constructed to help protect against supernatural elements. At first, her role was in experimental expeditions, and assisting in dimensional travel. When conflicting agendas were discovered within the, now redubbed, 'Institute', Hadley moved to a first line public safety position which better situated herself to help peaceful individuals. Shortly after, disturbances outside of their universe were picked up by her old department, and Hadley was tasked with investigating. Unfortunately, as they had found from prior missions, there was a barrier between their worlds and her knowledge was barred from her upon entry, along with most of her memories. With no recollection of her past, she could only stumble into this new world, picking up the name Hayden from one of her first companions - Stu Redman.

Hayden is naturally curious, and loves learning, but she is also a fan of the arts and relaxation. Especially relaxation. Good stories are essential. Comfy blankets, fluffy pillows, warms drinks, fires. As somebody with a higher anxiety level than others, she struggles to find a calm sometimes, and has been known to study breathing techniques and coping methods (some of a potentially questionable variety). Mediation also helps aid with setting up and maintaining an easily accessable mind library, which is a necessity for travelling. She is also an animal lover, which helps establish a light tone for her first interaction with Kojak, and in turn, Glen.

Teal is a color that is significant to her, and attached to a mental key of sorts. Her full playlist is here, although 'Smile' by Wolf Alice and 'Underworld' by Cyprss are go-tos for her. Style is more about comfort and practicality. Sweaters, jeans, sometimes a blazer for 'nicer' occasions. Layers and heavy coats are a must as she usually runs cold.

Stephanie Graham

Steph served as the 'tech guru' for her community. Working on the IT department of the hospital was primary, but she also set up her family and their friends. No, you can't just use the browser that comes with. That's your password?! Is that phone from this century? While she had her job, and was very close with her family, a good deal of her free time was spent in her apartment. A safe haven full of adopted house plants and stock piles of games. Video games, board games, multitudes of 20 sided dice. Her desk was a shrine to her fandoms and online activity. Does she have a Tumblr? Maybe, but she likes your shoelaces. Does she read fanfiction? C'mon that's not taboo anymore, right? It was a comfortable life. A manageable life. Until everybody started coughing...

Anxiety is also something that Steph suffers with, although that partly stems from her untreated ADHD. It is not uncommon to see her fixating, or obsessing over little things, and excitedly babbling on about something. There are many topics that she cannot be normal about, and expect her to really get 'in it'. Words coming out faster than they have any business being, and still not fast enough for her thoughts. This also happens when self consciousness kicks in too. Catch her appologizing for appologizing, and she appologize once more. For good measure.

Much like Hayden, Steph's color is in the green category. But while Hayden's is more of a jewel tone, Steph's is a reflection of her plants, and leans towards more of a forest shade. Her playlist is here, but her main song (and the original song I used when developing her) is 'Life is Short' by Bufferfly Boucher. Style is also a comfort concern for her. Flannels and t-shirts with jeans and chucks. Nothing fancy, she wouldn't know where to begin with any of that.

[grimmywrites]

10 Things About Me

I was tagged by the talented @patiently-burning. I’m happy to welcome you to the Ghostsoap brainrot, especially with @valiants amazing art. My favorite Ghostsoap artist! Their work makes me feral; I’d kill for them -- or at least write for them. Below for random facts about me!

1.) I double majored in Archaeology and Creative Writing in college. I idolized Lara Croft and Indiana Jones and then, luckily, fell in love with the *actual* science of archaeology and Roman history so I’ve managed to stick with it. 2.) I’ve lived on and off in Italy (semesters where I taught abroad) since 2017; and a couple times before that for my own study abroad program and archaeological digs/dives. 3.) I’m a runner! I usually run an hour, but sometimes I run up to 9 miles a morning not only to stay in shape but as meditation. I listen to audiobooks while I do it!

4.) I worked as a dog bather for a couple years to get money to go to grad school and then in a dog ‘boutique’ because I love dogs so much. I love all animals, dogs just happen to be my favorite.

5.) I’m a huge Resident Evil fan. I’ve been playing the games since they first came out (I was a little kid and had no clue what I was doing lol). I can literally rant on and on about the lore and timeline; og re4 and re2 are the best but I love the remakes and all the new fans!

6.) I’ve been published for scholarly writing, but it’s my dream to write fiction, primarily historical fiction.

7.) I’m an oddball who likes nerdy things *and* sports - I played varsity softball in high school and I’m still on an adult co rec team!

8.) I stopped writing fanfiction for a couple years while working on my thesis for grad school. I started writing again for Nellis because I reread some of my old stuff and wondered why I ever stopped with these characters. Writing them feels like slipping on my most comfortable shoes or a favorite shirt. After I read that stuff I got metaphorically slapped upside the head with the idea for Retread (the ending in particular)... and let’s just say it’s grown a lot from what I had envisioned; but I’m a gardener writer, so that makes sense.

9.) Besides RE, my favorite game in the world is an obscure RPG called Shadow Hearts. It’s a Lovecraftian horror game set in China and Europe just before WW1 breaks out - it deals with horror, the occult, and some zany characters. I cry every time I play it and its sequel (Shadow Hearts: Covenant). Most people like the second game better, but I find the first one to be creepier, have better music, and the characters are more interesting. The sequel IS a good game, though.

10.) I secretly wish I had more time! I often feel guilty because I’m more of a writer in fandom than a reader because I’m so busy with life smacking me every which way. I also wish I could output more, but alas, we can only do our best, right?

Thanks so much for tagging me! I’m not apologizing for the love of Soap or Ghost. That was a well written campaign! I’m going to tag more than one person: @peculiarreality-main and @ohlookapan!