#I was so close to a blackout lol

[hero-of-the-wolf]

Character bingo for Twilight?

MULTIPLE BINGOS :D

[wewontbesleeping]

i'm so glad i didn't inherit the alcohol enjoying gene

[moodytoots]

HEY!! renting wouldn't be so bad if not for the price! our hvac has to be replaced and sorry for my bf but if we owned this house it'd be window unit time son!

[brookbee]

Of course this is not an exhaustive list, but I picked the ones that appear to be the most popular on Spotify/the ones I think people might have a preference for.

[lipglossanon]

Our Lips Are Sealed

Brother-In-Law!Leon S. Kennedy x fem!reader

A Little More Savory tier commission from Anon 💜

Word Count: 2173 (I keep going over 😩 lol)

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, cheating, dirty talk, cucking (although the husband doesn’t know lol), breeding, size kink, breeding kink, kissing, fingering, squirting, unprotected sex, creampie

proofread ✍️

It’s another dumb family get-together hosted by your husband, which is basically an excuse for him to invite his brother and a few close cousins and get blackout drunk. This time, he uses the excuse of it being the holidays. 

“It’s the best time for families to come together!”

His exact words to you as the first of the invitees showed up at your front door. You’re honestly not surprised. It’s something you’ve come to expect from your husband. It’s put a strain on your marriage, although he somehow seems oblivious to it. The only person to lend you a sympathetic ear about the whole thing is your brother-in-law, Leon. 

He knows how much it bothers you, always giving you an empathetic smile once the drinking starts. You’ve noticed that he doesn’t drink as much when he’s around his brother—a fact that doesn’t go unnoticed by your husband. 

“What happened with you? Y’used to drink like a fish,” he laughs, face red. A few of the cousins chuckle along with him.

Leon shrugs with an easy grin in place, “Just like to take it easy these days. Enjoy the finer things in life.”

He shoots you a glance, and you go hot all over. Later, after everyone either passes out where they sit or go crashes in one of the guest rooms, Leon’s the last one standing to help you carry your lush of a husband to bed. 

Your heart races when Leon’s hand brushes across your lower back; it could be seen as an accident, just him trying to help his brother stagger along, but you know it’s more than that. Excitement thrills through your body, making you bite your bottom lip while you glance at Leon from under your lashes.

The first time anything illicit happened, it wasn’t even that bad. After helping your husband to bed, you sat on the couch with Leon and spilled your marital woes. He drew you in close, a sweet side hug, and the next thing you remember is grinding in his lap as you make-out on the couch. 

Since that time, your physical relationship has tipped over into the taboo; it’s a very well-kept secret between the two of you. No one suspects a thing—least of all your husband. As much as you hate the drinking and the constant informal parties, Leon makes the headache bearable. 

Dumping your husband on the bed, you turn him in his side to help prevent any choking if he happens to get sick later. Leon stands behind you, body heat a beacon against your back. 

He runs a hand down your arm. “You’re so gorgeous.”

“Leon,” you whisper urgently, eyes glued to your husband’s snoring face. “Wait until we leave.”

“Why? He won’t hear a thing,” he presses himself completely against you, rocking his bulge against the swell of your ass. “Gonna fuck you right here, sweetheart. Break this bed in.”

Slick coats the gusset of your panties, fabric sticking to the lips of your cunt. Biting your lip, you let Leon lead you around the edge of the bed until he’s pushing you down onto your side. 

He kisses you before slipping a hand under your dress to brush across your soaked slit.

“Fuck, so wet already. You want my cock?”

“Yes,” you whine. “Want it so bad.”

“Bet he doesn’t fuck you like you need, does he?” Leon goads, working your panties down and off your legs. “What a fucking loser.”

“Leon,” you gasp. “You shouldn’t say that about your brother.”

“Why? It’s the truth,” he cups your pussy, middle and ring finger parting your slick folds. “Too bad you married the wrong Kennedy, sweetheart.”

Whining softly, you roll your hips down into his hand, “Leon, please, just touch me.”

“I gotta finger this tight hole or ‘m not gonna fit,” he croons, fucking his fingers into your fluttering walls. “We both know this little pussy hasn’t had a cock this big.��

Keening in your throat, you ruck your dress up so Leon has easier access to the apex of your thighs. 

“Look at that pretty hole,” he groans, fingers seeking out the spot at the front of your cunt that makes you squeeze down on the digits. “Married pussy’s the best.”

“D-don’t say that,” your thighs twitch, arousal burning hot in your belly.

“Why not?” He grins, and it makes your heart race. “It’s true. You’re married, and you’ve got the best pussy I’ve ever had.”

Cunt squeezing down on his fingers, you tangle your fingers in the sheets, shooting a quick glance to make sure your husband is still passed out. 

“I can’t wait anymore,” Leon mutters to himself, fingers slipping from your wet heat with a wet schlick. 

His middle and ring finger are shiny with slick as he pops them in his mouth with a groan. “Taste so good, but I’m too impatient to lick you til you scream.”

You gasp, watching with dilated eyes while he takes his shirt off and pulls his jeans and briefs down to his thighs. The tip of his fat cock drips precum down the shaft, making your mouth water for a taste.

He grips the base and shakes his dick at you. “Look at you drooling over it. Bet you’d love if I fucked that sweet little throat. Don’t worry, one of these days, I’ll have you choking and gagging all over my dick.”

You nod along with his words, clit throbbing like a second heartbeat and pussy dripping slick all over your thighs. He’s big. Much bigger than your husband’s dick; it sends a pulse through your cunt, knowing he’s about to fill you up and stretch you out on his cock.

Kneeling in front of you, he humps your pussy, thick cock, sliding through your slick folds and across your clit. Whimpering, you part your thighs even further. 

“Please, Leon.”

His head presses against your hole but doesn’t sink in any further. He grips his cock and rocks the tip in and out of your cunt. 

“Am I gonna fit in this tight little hole, baby?” He mocks, slapping the fat head of his dick down onto your wet pussy. “God, I’m gonna stretch this little pussy out.”

Whimpering, your eyes dart over to your husband passed out on his side of the bed. Your marital bed is pretty big—he always complained about needing the space—and now you’re appreciating that fact more than ever. 

Leon clicks his tongue. “What a poor, frustrated little pussy. She’s crying she needs my cock so bad.”

Choking out a moan, your head thrashes back and forth against your pillow while Leon sinks his thick cock inch by inch in your snug pussy. 

“Fucking hell, he’s not been giving it to you, has he?”

“Uh uh,” you hiccup a whine. “You’re too big. It hurts.”

“Aww,” he leans forward, bottoming out in your pussy with a grunt. “We’ll just have to get this hole used to being so full. Doesn’t that feel good?”

Your pussy flutters and pulses around his cock, slick coating his length. “Fuck, it’s so big.”

“Yeah, it is,” he chuckles before kissing your temple. “And your married pussy is a perfect fit. So snug and wet.”

Covering your mouth with your hand, you cry out against your palm as Leon begins to fuck you with hard, deep strokes. Eyes rolling back in your head and toes curling in pleasure, you rock your hips against his thrusts, pussy gripping his cock like a vice. His pelvis grinds against your clit every time he bottoms out in your cunt. 

It’s so unfair how good this feels—knowing your husband’s right next to you as his brother pounds into your needy pussy. The pleasure crests higher and higher, body jostling with the movement so hard your tits bounce underneath your dress.

“I’m gonna cum inside you,” he whispers, grinning down at you, sweat darkening his fringe. “Cum all inside this cheating slutty pussy.”

“No!” Your voice cracks. “You can’t! What about m-my husband?”

“What about him?” Leon swivels his hips, the fat tip of his cock rubbing against your g-spot hard enough to make you squeal. “You’re fucking gagging to have me stuff you. You love my cock rawing this sweet little puss.” 

“Noo,” you cling to his biceps, fingers digging into his skin.

“Fine,” he sighs. “I guess I’ll just pull out and—“

You tangle your hands in his hair and bring him closer for a dirty, tongue-filled kiss, pussy walls gripping his dick tightly. 

“Please, don’t,” you whine. “Want your cock, want you to cum in me.”

“Fuck, baby, gotta keep quiet,” Leon laughs in your ear, dick slowly rutting in and out of your squelching cunt. “This fat pussy’s so loud, gonna get us caught.”

“Leon,” you whine, nails digging into his bare shoulders. He hisses in pleasure, thrusting harder into your clenching heat. “Feels so good, can’t help it.”

“Yeah? This tight pussy just can’t stop creaming my cock, can she?” He coos in your ear, lips nipping at your lobe. “Want me to put a baby in this cheating pussy?”

Eyes fluttering closed, you moan loudly, legs wrapping around his waist to lock behind his back. “Oh, please, want you to knock me up.”

“Hell yeah, I’ll breed this hot little pussy,” he groans, moving up onto outstretched arms. His hips roll against yours, cock plunging deeper into your dripping hole. “Gonna blow my load in your greedy cunt til it takes.”

Pulling out suddenly, he grips your hips to manhandle you over onto your front. He yanks your ass back, pressing his palm on your shoulders to push your head onto the pillow. His cock bullies back into your sopping wet pussy, the sound—plap plap plap—filling the bedroom. 

You moan into your pillow, drool soaking the material as Leon rails you into the bed you share with your husband. 

He slows his pace, dragging his dick halfway out before sinking back in. “Which cock’s better, mine or my brother’s?”

“Huh?” Your brain is mush at this point, your thoughts concentrating on cumming all over his cock while he creampies you. 

“I said which cock is better,” he thrusts deep enough the tip bumps your cervix, making you moan weakly. “Mine or my brother’s?”

You stumbled over your words, not able to think when he reaches under your body to play with your clit. 

“Better question,” he purrs into your ear, “which cock do you love? Hmm? The one that makes you cum? The one that’s gonna breed this fat pussy til she’s pregnant? Or…”

He pulls out, and you whine while he smacks his wet cock against your ass, “Some fucking cuck who passes out while his brother dicks down his wife?”

“What’s it gonna be, baby?” He teases the tip in and out, in and out, until you finally press your ass back against him. 

“Yours, Leon,” you nearly sob when he fucks his cock back into your cunt. “Love your cock, s’the only one that makes me cum.”

He humps your ass, dick pounding at your drippy hole. “And? C’mon, what else?”

“A-and it’s the only cock I want to creampie my pussy,” you mewl, thrusting back against him. “Please, Leon, want you to cum in me. Cum in my cheating little pussy til you knock me up.”

“Goddamn,” he groans, fucking you so hard and fast the bed shakes. “Good fucking girl, gonna breed this needy pussy, gonna knock up my brother’s wife—fuck!”

He slips his hand around your hip and begins rubbing your slippery clit in quick circles. 

“Cum for me, want this slutty pussy creaming my cock so I can fill her up,” he bites the shell of your ear. “Cum for me, so I can give you a baby.”

He slaps your clit with the flat of his fingers, and it pushes you over the edge, climax overtaking your body. You squirt, slick gushing from your hole to coat his pelvis and run down your thighs. 

“Fucking hell, that’s it, baby, show me how much this pussy likes my cock,” Leon moans. 

You shake and scream, burying your face in the pillow to muffle the noise. Fireworks explode behind your eyes while your pussy milks his cock over and over, dripping slick all over the two of you. 

“That’s it, fuck, gonna breed you nice and deep like I promised,” Leon curses under his breath and thrusts a few more times against you before sinking to the hilt. 

Hot, thick spurts of cum fill your fluttering walls until it spills out around his cock. Rutting against your ass, he grinds his cock in your pulsing cunt. After a few minutes, he takes in a deep breath and pulls out with a low groan. You lay there, panting heavily into your pillow, body completely spent. 

He smacks the head of his cock against your sensitive and puffy cunt, “Since this naughty little pussy is just leaking out all my cum, guess I’ll have to stuff it again.”

[waywardxrhea]

Heart's Desire - a Spencer Reid one shot

pairing: Spencer Reid x BAU!fem!reader (no use of y/n)

word count: 9.58k

When working a serial killer case in Tennessee, you become the bait for a violent unsub whose victims all match your description. When going after the man you collapse and are rushed to the hospital for medical treatment.

a/n: so yes, this is a Reader one shot, but it is super niche so...whoops? this honestly was just a super self-indulgent fic for me to write because i can't say i have ever seen the heart condition i had presented in the media and i really wanted to explore how Spencer may interact with it, so here we are! this is my first time writing for the criminal minds fandom, so shout out to my bestie who helped me out with coming up with case details and smaller plot points that have been incorporated into this little one shot!

content: fluff (oh how i adore the fluff in this one!), multilingual Reader, secret relationship, implied smut (if you squint lol), insecure Reader, Reader fits the victimology, graphic description of canon level violence, Reader is bait for the unsub, protective Spencer, mentions of jealous and possessive Spencer, language, medical emergencies, small medical inaccuracies (no AED on the scene - i had to do it for the drama don't judge), crying Spencer.

(not my gif), CM dividers by @firefly-graphics , EKG dividers by me

“Good morning, beautiful,” you heard Spencer’s sleep ridden voice mumble from behind you as you began to stir awake with the sun that was filtering in through the curtains of Spencer’s bedroom. The two of you had just gotten back from a case the day before and you were utterly exhausted. All you wanted to do was sleep in, and although he had bought blackout curtains for this exact reason, the sun still somehow managed to slip through, which you cursed the manufacturer for every time…

You flipped around in his arms to face him and sent a sleepy smile at him before mumbling, “Bonjour mon amour.” 

“Oh so it’s a French morning?” Spencer asked with a quiet chuckle as he took your hand in his and kissed your knuckles.

“I was debating between that and Italian, but… French usually gets us to where I would love to spend this free day with you,” you replied with a smirk before leaning up to kiss him.

After a few slow and loving kisses, Spencer pulled away for a brief moment to rest his forehead on yours and say, “You know since we just got back from a case out of state that took so long to solve, the odds of the team getting called back out are significantly lower than if-”

And then your phones started ringing. 

“What were you saying about the odds being low?” you muttered with a sigh as you turned back over in the bed and grabbed your phone off of the nightstand. You heard the automated voice on the other side tell you that there was a case the BAU was requested to work and that your presence was requested as soon as possible. 

As you sighed and closed your eyes briefly while you tried to sink back into the pillow, Spencer noted, “Well I did say the odds were low, not zero…” You couldn’t help the smile that slipped onto your face at the comment as you laughed and lightly hit him in the bare chest with a throw pillow. 

“‘Never tell me the odds,’” you told him as you reluctantly began getting out of bed, sitting up on the edge and stretching to wake up your tired muscles. 

Spencer positioned himself to where his legs were on either side of you and wrapped his arms around your torso before kissing your neck and mumbling, “No matter how many times you quote Han Solo at me, it’s not gonna stop me from telling you the odds of things, you know that right?”

“I know, I know…” you told him with a giggle as you toyed with his hands that were clasped in front of your stomach. “So how far apart do we have to leave again so they aren’t suspicious?” 

“Well your apartment is about a thirty minute commute from the office while mine is twenty depending on traffic, so you'll leave ten minutes after me,” he reminded you as you both began to get up and untangle yourselves from each other. “I have an extra go-bag packed for you in the closet as well as a few outfits so you aren’t wearing the same clothes you came home in yesterday.”

“You’re the best, Spence,” you told him quietly as you both made your way into the bathroom to get ready for the day. 

As you jumped into the shower to take advantage of your extra ten minutes, you thought about your relationship with Spencer. You two had started dating about a year after you joined the BAU and out of fear of getting in trouble, like two teenagers you hid the relationship from your teammates. Your transfer from Homeland Security was prompted when your interrogation and hostage negotiation tactics landed you on the BAU’s radar and you very quickly became fast friends with the whole team. So with the guise of being your usual friendly self, it truthfully hadn’t been too hard to hide the relationship from your friends. And while Spencer was hesitant about hiding a relationship from a group of people like the BAU team, your fear of being let go as the “more inferior” member out of the two of you was what convinced him to keep it a secret. It also prompted him to lecture you on your clear inferiority complex, but that was neither here nor there. 

“I’ll see you there, drive safe,” Spencer told you before kissing your cheek as you wrapped yourself in your towel to dry off while finishing your routine. 

“You too,” you replied, giving him a peck on the lips before he began walking out of the restroom and apartment to head to headquarters. 

When you got to HQ, you yawned as you made a beeline for the break room for some much needed caffeine. When you got inside, you cordially told Spencer and Derek, “Good morning you two,” as you poured your coffee, creamer, and sugar into the mug you always had on your desk. It was your parting gift from your Homeland team that was in the shape of the sun and what prompted your nickname from Derek. 

He laughed as he watched you and Spencer prepare your coffees, telling you, “You know Sunshine, I think with how much creamer you put in that you may have Pretty Boy beat on sugar consumption.”

“Ha ha very funny,” you told him with a playful roll of your eyes as you turned to walk from the break room and into the bullpen. 

As the three of you ambled into the area, Hotch emerged from his office and announced, “Sorry to call you all in so soon after getting back from a case, but this one is something we aren’t taking lightly and needs to be stopped because the unsub is escalating quickly.” So after a quick briefing on what he knew of the case, Hotch told you all to be prepared for wheels up in thirty. 

When the plane landed in Tennessee later that afternoon and you stood up from your perch, you stumbled a bit when you felt your heart give an irregular stutter in your chest. “You okay, kid?” David asked you with concern in his eyes after seeing the brief moment of panic flit across your features. 

“Yeah, fine, just feeling a bit off after that flight I guess,” you replied, taking a deep breath and straightening up which seemed to do the trick as your heart began beating in a regular rhythm once more. 

“You know, I wouldn’t say I blame you if you were a bit anxious,” he told you as you both exited the jet and started making your way to the black SUVs awaiting your arrival. “It isn’t every day we get cases as violent as this one, especially when the victims…”

“All look like me?” you supplied quietly when he trailed off at the end of his sentence. It was true that when you began going over the pertinent files on the flight that all of the unsub’s victims shared many of your physical features, and while that did alarm you, you knew that your team would have your back during this case no matter what. You placed a small smile on your lips as you told him, “I’ll rest easier when this guy’s behind bars.”

“That’s the spirit,” he told you with a warm smile as you loaded into the SUV, your bag at your feet and your case file in your lap as you continued to read over what all the unsub had been up to in the last couple of months. 

After you all got to the local police precinct and got settled in and assigned tasks, you made your way to their break room for another cup of coffee, only to be followed in by Spencer a few moments later. As you both made your drinks, you casually turned so you were leaning on the counter and watching over the office as Spencer asked, “Are you okay?”

“You know, Dave asked me the same thing, I’m starting to think you guys are more worried about me than I am,” you told him, your lips covered by your cup in case anyone you couldn't see was watching. 

“I always worry about you,” Spencer told you softly as he stirred his sugary drink. 

“And I, you, but for now we need to work on getting this guy in cuffs and it won’t happen if either of us get distracted,” you said with a sort of finality in your tone, determined to make sure you conveyed a sense of confidence or else you too may fall victim to worrying about yourself instead of working the case. 

As you walked out to the desk where you were allowed to set up, Penelope ran past you, almost toppling you over as she shouted, “Hotch, I found out how he’s luring the victims!” 

“How?” your unit chief asked as she made his company. The team had barely been here a couple hours and the locals' work was already being combed through and missing clues were being found. 

“Dating apps! On every victim’s phone was a dating app and she had planned a date with a man from there. None of the men’s accounts were the same and none of them had common pictures, but the unsub always used the same lines when chatting the women up!” she told him in a rush as she showed him pages she had printed out while doing her dive into the womens' phones. 

Spencer emerged from the break room with his coffee in hand, saying, “Well based on that knowledge we can assume that dating apps have a significant meaning to him.” 

From her place nearby, JJ spoke up, saying, “Every victim had her left ring finger severed off, maybe his wife cheated on him using one?”

As Derek walked into the room with David hot on his heels, he added, “And turns out they also had their ovaries taken out by the unsub.”

“As well as their cervix glued shut with industrial sealant before their genitals were mutilated,” David supplied, his head shaking as he handed Hotch the ME reports. 

A scoff huffed out of your chest before you mused, “So he feels slighted by his ex wife and has decided that in order to pacify that anger he does what he wishes he could to her to the victims…” 

“Do we know if any of the victims was the ex wife?” Derek asked. 

“Nope, all the victims are single women who have been on dating apps for quite some time and none of them have an active or otherwise marriage license under their name,” Penelope replied. 

“Good work everyone, let’s get to work finding this guy,” Hotch said. “Find out all you can, I want to give this brief before nightfall.”

“Yes sir,” you all replied before once again splitting off into your assigned tasks. 

Right as the sun began to set that evening, Hotch called everyone together and the team began giving the locals the brief on the unsub. Hotch of course began the brief, informing the locals, “The unsub is a caucasian male in his mid thirties to early forties who we believe to have a medical background in surgery and likely just went through a rough divorce." 

You were the next to speak, announcing, “We believe he was cheated on by his ex wife, which is what triggered the break and the murders. The victims all share common features which we assume are also shared by the ex wife.” As you said this, you clicked the remote in your hand and on the board behind you popped up the faces of the victims. 

With the slightest tremor in his voice, Spencer was the next to piggyback, saying, “The victims have all been found with mutilated genitals as well as their left ring finger cut off. The unsub also took the time to use industrial glue to seal the victim’s cervix shut and to cut out her ovaries.”

Derek was next to speak, adding to Spencer’s statement, “The cause of death in all the victims was prolonged blood loss. This tells us that he's performing these rituals while the victim is still alive.”

“He’s tech savvy, enough so that he is able to create difficult to trace profiles on dating apps on which he seduces victims before murdering them,” Penelope said sadly. 

JJ was next, telling the team, “The only evidence that he’s left behind are the bodies in secluded dump locations and as of right now we do not know where the victims are being killed.”

David was the last to speak, rounding out the brief with, “All of this combined leads us to believe that he is a very calculated and dangerous individual who needs to be found before he strikes again.” When he was done, Hotch dismissed everyone to begin their search with this new information. 

“Hey chief?” came a voice from the front of the office a few minutes later. Both the local police chief and Hotch looked up at the young man expectantly before he replied, “There’s been another victim…”

“He’s escalating again…” Hotch mumbled as he ran a hand over his chin. “There was a lot less time between victims. We need to work faster.”

“Yes sir,” everyone replied before attempting to double down on their work. 

As they all began working, the gears in your mind began to spin and when you finally formulated a plan, you approached Hotch and said, “Sir, I think I may have an idea on how to catch him.”

“How?”

“We do a sting. Penelope makes a dating profile for me on one of those apps and we use me as bait,” you told him, never breaking eye contact to convey that you were serious about the idea. “If we can get someone inside then we get our guy as well as possible evidence for half a dozen murders.”

Hotch sighed before saying your name warily. “You know how risky that is.”

“And that risk is something I am willing to take in order to stop this guy. If we don’t do this then there may be another victim tomorrow, maybe two,” you said. Squaring your shoulders, you added, “I agreed to take this job in order to help people. I fit the victimology. This is how I can help.”

A few moments of silence passed as Hotch seemed to weigh his options before he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he said, “Fine. I’ll think through the details. I want everyone well rested tonight before we start planning tomorrow. You and Garcia share a room at the hotel so she can start making that profile for you.”

“Yes sir,” you replied with a small smile and a nod before heading off to find Penelope so you two could head to the hotel and begin. 

“So are you on one of these apps normally?” Penelope asked as the two of you sat beside each other on the hotel bed, laptop and phones in hand to create this fake profile for yourself. 

“Me? No, I don’t trust them for this exact reason,” you replied, shuddering as you thought about the poor women who thought they were simply going to meet a new man but paid with their lives and dignity. 

“Oh I see,” Penelope said before instructing you to find a specific type of photo in your camera roll that the unsub may find attractive. “Are you dating at all?”

“Oh, uh, not really,” you said, trying to pace your words so they didn’t seem panicky. “This job takes up a lot of my time and all so it would be hard to find time for a relationship between cases.”

“You have an excellent point, but you can’t let something like that hold you back! You deserve all the happiness in the world!” she told you cheerfully as she continued typing away at the laptop. “What are your interests?”

Smiling inwardly at how the subject turned from your dating life you told her, “Reading, rom coms, coffee, patisseries, art, the occasional drink.” As you thought for a moment, you added, “Ooh, make sure you put ‘not looking for anything serious.’ I think that’s something that may trigger the unsub into choosing my profile.”

“Smart!” she replied before selecting that option on the profile. “We should do this more often! Maybe when this is all said and done we can make you a real one and I can just do a background check of the person before you go on a date!”

You laughed lightly as you told her, “Let’s make sure I survive this case first then we’ll go from there.”

The next morning came and went as the team tried to track the guy to no avail, so right before lunch, Hotch gathered everyone around and announced, “Okay, this unsub is proving hard to find by other methods, so we’ve decided to pull a sting. We can’t just sit around waiting for our surprisingly extensive list of divorced surgeons to make a move.” He motioned to you and Penelope and said, “These two worked on creating a fake dating profile that the unsub may fall for. The plan is to get him alone and our resident interrogator will pull a confession out of him.”

“Wait what?” Spencer asked immediately, his eyes wide. “Is it a good idea to send her in when we know the unsub is escalating?”

“It’s the only lead we can get right now,” Hotch told him. “If we don’t do this tonight then we may risk another woman dying at his hands.”

“Yeah, and it may be her,” Derek said a bit sharply, the idea of sending you into the belly of the beast not sitting right with him either. 

“Not if we’re all on our A-games when it goes down,” David said in an attempt to calm the younger men down. “If you’re so concerned, we can send you into wherever he asks to meet her so we can have eyes on her the entire time." He chuckled before adding, "Derek, not you Spencer, no offense but you do tend to stick out like a sore thumb in certain environments."

“But-” Spencer tried, but was cut off by Hotch. 

“No buts, we’re doing this. Tonight. Garcia, activate the profile.”

“Yes sir,” she replied quietly before opening up her phone and clicking a few buttons. “It’s done.”

“Good.” He turned to you and said your name to get your attention. “Just make sure you reply to any account that may fit the profile. Garcia will run a trace on it to see when it was created since we knew he makes a new account for every victim.”

“Yes sir,” you replied, nodding your head as you pulled out your phone and got to work. While you scrolled through the app and took a seat in one of the secluded offices to eat your lunch, you were startled by another presence entering the room without knocking. “Geez Spence, you scared me!” you scolded him, clutching your chest in a vain attempt to slow your racing heart. 

“And you’re scaring me,” he told you as he shuttered the blinds to prevent any passersby from seeing the two of you in there together. As you sat your phone down on the table, he covered your hand with his and asked sincerely, “Are you okay with this plan?”

You nodded. “It was my idea. We need to get this guy before another innocent woman dies.”

Echoing Derek, he asked, “And what if that turns out to be you?”

You scoffed humorously before deadpanning, “And you really think you’d let that happen?” After he floundered with his words for a few seconds, you kissed him gently before saying, “I trust that if anything goes sideways you’ll be there to save me. You always are. I just need you to trust me and my judgment on this one. Do you trust me?”

“Of course I trust you, it’s just-” he tried, but you cut him off with another kiss. 

“Just trust me, love,” you told him once you pulled away again. 

After you said this, your phone pinged with a notification that caught your attention. You picked it up and saw that there was a new message in your dating app’s inbox. “Hey beautiful, you look like you are in need of some company. How about you meet me at Monroe’s tonight and we see where this goes,” Spencer read with disdain in his voice. He cringed before saying, “Please say that’s not what I sounded like flirting with you…”

You laughed, telling him, “No, the poetry you quoted at me was much more romantic than that line.” You placed one more quick kiss to his lips before telling him, “I’m gonna have Penny run this profile and we’ll see if it could be our guy.”

Turns out there was a high chance of it being your guy, seeing as the profile was created just hours before and yours was the only account that he interacted with. So after a chat with Hotch about the plan to get this guy to confess, you got dressed in a little black number and silver heels, finishing your look with the most effortful hair and makeup you had done in a while. When you emerged into the precinct you saw that Spencer was the only one in the immediate area. “Where is everyone?” you asked. 

“Getting the gear ready and briefing the police. I got the distinct honor of greeting you,” he told you with a warm smile as he drank in your appearance. His eyes darted around the room to ensure the two of you were alone before he wrapped you in his arms and kissed the top of your head, mumbling into your hair, “Tu es magnifique.”

“Merci beaucoup,” you replied, feeling a heat rush up your neck and into your cheeks at his words. No matter how long you and Spencer had been together, whenever he flirted with you, especially in any of the different languages you spoke, you still got flustered. 

When Spencer’s arms quickly untangled themselves from your embrace you rightly assumed that the team was emerging into the offices once more. Hotch called out your name before asking, “Are you ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” you replied with a nod, smoothing out your dress before joining the team near the door. 

On the way to the bar in the taxi you were assigned to take, Hotch went over the plan once more, detailing to you that Derek was already at the bar to keep an eye on you in case things went sideways, that you are to attempt to get any sort of confession out of the unsub, and if you can get information on where the killings were happening that would be even better. You had a plan in mind to attempt and get inside his head and get him to confess without even realizing it, so as you walked into the bar you feigned confidence as you walked up and sat on a barstool to wait for the unsub to approach you. 

Derek sat across the room behind you to your left, near the door, and his soothing voice came through the in-ear you had, saying, “All right Sunshine, if things go sideways you just say the word and I’m all over this guy.”

“Just trust me,” you told him quietly as you took your first drink from the water glass that the bartender handed you with your drink. 

“I believe I’m supposed to be meeting you here?” came a voice from beside you a few minutes later. 

You turned toward the voice and smiled in greeting. He did fit the profile, strikingly actually. You noticed a tan line on his left ring finger and how his hands were slightly cracked and dry, perhaps from surgical scrubbing at his job. You offered out your hand for him to kiss as well as your name before telling him, “I believe so. And you’re already nearly half a drink behind, so why don’t you catch up, handsome?”

“I think we can make that arrangement,” he said after kissing your knuckles.

"That was smooth, remind me why you're single again?" JJ asked with a quiet laugh through the in-ear.

You kept your facial expression in response to the comment neutral as the unsub ordered his drink from the bartender. When the two of you began talking, the team kept their ends of the coms silent as you worked to get what information you needed from the unsub. 

During the conversation, you almost dragged out what you wanted from him, but he always skirted around it. You knew he was your man though, that was plain as day when he spoke about his ex wife who he told you moved off to California to be with the man she cheated on him with. During the conversation, Penelope informed you quietly that she had found record of the woman as well as IDing the man sitting across from you as Doctor Samuel Costner, who specialized in abdominal surgery.

After another paced drink from you and a couple more for him, he stood behind you and wrapped his arms around you, his hands splaying out over the tops of your thighs as he asked, “How about I take you back to my place and show you a good time?”

Bingo. His place. One of the things the team couldn’t figure out was where the unsub lived, otherwise it would have been much easier to locate him and the possible murder site. With this information in mind, you leaned back into his embrace and told him, “I like the sound of that.”

The silence from the team was broken as Spencer’s voice asked, “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“As long as we tail them it should be fine,” you heard JJ tell him. 

“We have his name now though, can’t we just have Garcia dig into where he lives and go from there?” Spencer countered.

“And go in with what suspicion? We need evidence that he’s killing there in order to step onto the property,” JJ replied.

“But this is a controlled scene, if she gets in the car with him we can’t control what happens in there. What if we lose the truck on the backroads? This is too risky, I’m-”

“Reid sit down and trust her,” you heard Hotch scold him, a finality in his voice. “What we need is a location and she’s getting us exactly that. Now sit back and let her work or else I’m pulling you from this case.”

“Yes sir…” Spencer eventually said. 

“Remember the signal,” Derek mumbled as you and the man made your way out of the bar and to his truck. 

A nearly thirty minute drive took you to a farm that had vast amounts of pastures and trails hidden within the woods as well as a large picturesque barn that looked just like they all did in the movies. “So this is where you live huh? It’s beautiful…” you breathed as you looked around, trying to take in any specific details you may need to relay to the team in case they weren’t able to tail you. 

He nodded as he pulled up in front of the barn, putting his hand on your thigh as he said, “Family owned and operated since the 1800s. And while I don’t do much of the labor around here because of work, I am still the proud owner. Maybe you could be too one day.”

“Oh yeah?” you asked in your most alluring voice as you slightly widened the space between your thighs, the gesture making you feel filthy, but if this was how you caught the unsub then so be it. 

The kisses that he gave you started off innocently enough, but soon turned aggressive and you cringed inwardly at the fact that you knew the team was listening to everything from their end of the coms. You didn't even want to think about what was going through Spencer's mind - the man had a reputation of being jealous and possessive sometimes when you two went out and guys flirted with you.

Before you knew it, the unsub was coming over to your side of the truck and opening the door. He pulled you into his arms and asked, “How about we go for a roll in the hay?” You giggled innocently before agreeing, subtly eyeing the black SUVs that had begun to creep onto the outskirts of the property line with their headlights out. They followed you. Good.

So as he took you deeper into the barn and to an area that was lined with tarps that had seen better days, your eyes began scrutinizing every little thing that could be evidence that he had killed those women here. And you found it as you eyed a corner of another tarp that seemed to have dried blood on it. 

Right as you were about to sneak in your code word to the team to signal you had what you needed, you heard Spencer’s distinct voice shouting, “FBI, hands where I can see them!”

“Shit!” the man shouted before jumping off of you and darting away, the large knife you had somehow not noticed before dropping to the ground as he sprinted off. 

“We’ve got a rabbit!” you shouted, tossing off your heels and beginning to run after him. “I’m taking the back exit, someone go around the side!”

“On it!” JJ called as she began running around the other side of the barn to cut him off. 

When you ran out of the door you saw him leave out of, you were met with a wooden fence that he had jammed in the few moments you were distracted. Not wanting to waste any time, you opted to climb the fence, jumping over and landing awkwardly on your feet. When you did, you felt your heart give an irregular stutter in your chest before starting to beat rapidly. As you stood up, you began to get light headed and it felt like cotton filled your ears as you faintly heard a commotion around the corner of the barn. Heat seemed to fill every part of your body and your vision started to tunnel as you gasped for air, stumbling around to try and steady yourself on the side of the barn before your body gave in and collapsed. 

“Stay down!” JJ sternly told the man as she pinned him to the ground and cuffed him. “Samuel Costner, you’re under arrest for the murder of six women.” 

As JJ recited his rights and escorted him to one of the police cruisers that had emerged on the scene, Spencer looked around and asked where you were. “Didn’t she say she was going out the back?” Derek asked. “I didn’t see her come back around…” 

Panic filled Spencer’s body immediately and he began quickly making his way around the barn with Derek hot on his heels. What if Costner got to you in desperation before JJ arrested him? What if you were bleeding out behind the barn? He had to get to you quickly. 

When he rounded the corner and saw you collapsed on the ground, he shouted your name before sprinting over and feeling for a pulse. After a few seconds and some quick math, he said, “Her heart rate is 238 and she feels clammy… She’s not bleeding that I can see, but she’s hardly breathing. Derek!”

“On it!” he shouted, pulling out his walkie to dispatch an ambulance to the location. “They said it’ll take about twenty minutes to get here.”

“She might not have twenty minutes!” Spencer snapped as he watched your now frail body and how you were losing color quickly. With a strength that Derek didn’t know he had, Spencer lifted you into his arms and began carrying you to one of the SUVs, telling him, “Get one of the officers to give us an escort, we’re taking her!”

“Oh, got it!” Derek stuttered out before barking orders at an officer and getting into the driver’s seat of the SUV. 

“What’s going on?” JJ asked as she quickly jumped into the passenger seat while Spencer got you and himself into the back seat. 

They took off at a rapid speed, Derek intending on cutting the ride to the hospital in half at least as he pushed the pedal into the floor as far as it would go. 

“I don’t know, her heart is racing though and we found her collapsed,” Spencer told her, his own breath beginning to come in rapidly as he began to panic. 

“Spence, look at me,” JJ told him gently which prompted him to look up at her. “We’re gonna figure it out. She’ll be okay. What do we know?”

As he ran his thumb over your jaw in a way of soothing himself, Spencer rattled off to JJ, “Well obviously she was in a state of stress during the sting, but even a panic attack wouldn’t cause her heart to beat this fast, panic attacks top out at about 200 beats per minute. She’s usually good at controlling her anxiety anyway, especially under pressure like this… He couldn’t have drugged her at the bar because she got all her drinks directly from the bartender and she was cognizant of what she was doing and saying the whole time. As far as I know, at her last doctor’s appointment she was given a clean bill of health…”

“Well not being drugged is good, we can work with that,” JJ reassured him. She checked the map on her phone and said, “We’re almost there, just hang in there.”

When you arrived at the hospital, Spencer carried you in and placed you on the stretcher that was waiting at the triage door. “What happened?” a nurse asked as a doctor walked up while the team began placing EKG leads all over your chest. 

“We’re FBI. We were working a case and she was chasing down a perp. I didn’t see her come back from where she said she was going and I found her like this,” Spencer replied as he began following them while they pushed you into a room, JJ and Derek hot on his heels. 

“Any significant medical history?” she asked as they began plugging the wires into machines which immediately began blaring with alarms. 

As Spencer began rattling off your medical history, two of the nurses escorted JJ and Derek into the hall to clear some space for the medical team. After two nurses got IVs started in your left arm, another came running in with some syringes, vials of medication, and a cart. As they began preparing the medication, the doctor looked toward Spencer and told him, “We’re about to give her a medication that’s going to stop her heart.”

“What?!” he shouted, his eyes wide. 

Calmly the doctor continued, saying, “It’s got a super short half-life so it’ll only be for a few moments and then her heart should go back into a normal rhythm. It’s a very routine drug. She may feel sore afterward but that is to be expected.”

And so a pair of nurses worked together to quickly administer the medication and sure enough for a few moments he watched the monitor as your heart stopped and Spencer could practically feel his own stop too. The tension in his shoulders eased up slightly as your heart returned to a normal 88 beats per minute but then alarms started blaring again within seconds as the EKG suddenly looked like a toddler was scribbling on the monitor. Spencer knew that rhythm from a book he read one time and knew that it was deadly if not treated quickly. In a blind rage, he shouted at the doctor, “You said that medication would help! Look what happened! I want a different doctor on her case right now and-”

“Get him out of here! Geneva get the defibrillation pads on her and deliver 200 joules. If that doesn’t work start CPR!” the doctor called before shouting more orders to the rest of the team, two of which began trying to escort Spencer from the room. 

“You can’t just-!” he shouted in frustration before he felt a hand on his shoulder that squeezed gently. 

“Let them work,” came Derek’s voice from behind him. 

When Spencer wrestled himself out of the nurses’ hold and watched them go back into the room and close the door that now had a blue light above it, both JJ and Derek saw the dangerous look in his eye, but JJ was the one brave enough to ask, “What the hell was that about Spence? You can’t just yell at the doctor like that! He was trying to help!”

“Him trying to help sent her into v-fib and now her heart isn’t working!” he retaliated, running a hand through his messy hair. He tried to hide the tears in his eyes as he turned away and stalked off down the hall, unsure of what to do with himself at the moment. 

“Spence!” JJ called after him, about to follow him, but was stopped when a gentle hand grabbed her forearm. 

“Let him go,” said David as he too watched Spencer’s retreating form. 

JJ sighed in frustration and said, “I just don’t know what’s gotten into him! Why would he yell at them? Yeah I’m worried too but that was a whole other level. I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen him that mad.”

“Just think about it from his perspective,” David told her vaguely before encouraging the two of them to meet the rest of the team in the waiting room. 

Once the pair of them parted ways, David sighed and took off in the direction he saw Spencer going. When he found him a few hallways over staring out a window into nothingness, David cleared his throat and asked, “How long has this been going on?”

“From the time I found her with her heart beating that fast it’s been twenty-eight minutes and thirty-seven seconds give maybe three minutes from the moment she took off after Costner. It’s been two minutes and forty-eight seconds since that doctor sent her into v-fib and effectively made her heart useless as a pump,” Spencer mumbled.

“That’s not what I meant, kid,” David told him, a small smile playing on the corners of his lips. He leaned his back against the window and said, “I know love when I see it.”

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Spencer said, his back straightening as it clicked in his mind what he was implying. 

Now David chuckled as he said, “Don’t lie to me, kid. I see the way you two look at each other. The way you joke around together. You’re relaxed around her.” He paused for a moment before adding, “And between you and me, I’ve seen you two sneak off together when you thought no one was looking.”

Spencer cringed at the last bit, but couldn’t help the small smile that graced his lips at the thought of you. “We’ve been together for just over a year,” he said softly, the smile growing wider as he remembered your anniversary a few weeks prior. That smile quickly faltered though when he remembered what was happening in that hospital room a few halls down. 

“She’s going to pull through,” David said gently, his hand landing on Spencer’s back, giving him a gentle pat. 

When he said that, Spencer’s phone started ringing with a call from Hotch, who told him, “She’s stable and resting, they gave her a sedative so she doesn’t overwork herself again. The rest of us need to finish up at the scene. I trust you can get your paperwork done on the jet later. Call with updates please.”

“Yes sir,” Spencer replied, a tinge of hope in his voice at the words. 

“Well?” David asked expectantly when Spencer hung up.

“She’s stable!” he told him, the tension in his shoulders leaving as he exhaled deeply. 

“Then go to her!” David said, a smile on his face. 

“I-I will!” Spencer said, turning to take off toward the room he left you in. Before he could leave the older gentleman’s presence though, he asked, “David?”

“Yeah?”

“Please don’t tell Hotch.”

“It’s not my secret to tell,” he replied with a nod before he answered his cell, presumably with his own call from their unit chief.

The wait for you to wake up took longer than Spencer would have liked, and by then they already had to move you out of the emergency department and to a cardiac monitoring floor to make room for more emergencies. When your eyes finally fluttered open in the early hours of the morning, you cringed at the bright light coming from the window before orienting yourself to your surroundings. You were in a hospital room that much was clear, and beside you was Spencer, with one hand in yours and the other holding up what looked like a map that you assumed was a medication insert. Only Spencer would be reading up on whatever medications they may have given you for whatever you ended up in here for…

“Spence?” you whispered to get his attention. When his hazel eyes flicked away from the pamphlet and met yours, you could see how they instantly flooded with tears as a smile made its way onto his face. As he gently threw his arms around you, you asked, “What happened?”

“When you ran after the unsub you collapsed and your heart was beating extremely fast. I got you into the SUV and Derek drove you here to get treated,” he replied, his voice muffled by your hair. You could hear this disdain in this voice as he added, “They gave you this medication that stopped your heart and was supposed to put you back into a normal rhythm but it ended up making things worse. You went into an even deadlier heart rhythm and they had to shock you. No CPR thankfully, but the nurses said that if that first shock didn’t get you back they would have had to…” He pulled you impossibly closer as he whispered, “I was so scared. I thought I lost you…”

“Hey, hey, hey, I’m right here,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion as you attempted to comfort him by rubbing soothing circles into his back. That was a lot to take in, but you hated seeing Spencer so upset and that was your biggest concern at the moment. 

You cleared your throat, but before you could ask what was on your mind, there was a knock at the door and two people came in, a nurse and a doctor of cardiology. The doctor sent you a warm smile and said, “It’s good to see you awake Miss, you gave the ED team a real scare last night!” 

“It was the doctor down there that caused such a fuss…” Spencer muttered, which earned a squeeze of your hand that warned him to be cordial. 

“Yes, that’s actually what I came up here to talk to you two about, er, you Miss.” He glanced down to your hands and didn’t notice a ring, so he asked, “And what’s your relation may I ask? Are you okay with him being here for this?”

“He’s my boyfriend and yes he’s allowed to be here. If I don’t remember something that big brain in there will,” you said, a quiet laugh leaving your lips. 

“Okay, great!” the doctor said as he clapped his hands together. “So when you came in, you were in what we call SVT which they treated with a medication called adenosine since you were unresponsive. It’s a fairly routine drug for emergent SVT conversion. When they gave it to you however, it threw your heart into V-fib which essentially caused your heart muscles to quiver instead of contract. In my years of experience, I’ve only ever seen one condition that would cause that medication to make your heart react like that.” He motioned for the nurse to hand the two of you a piece of paper as he continued, “What I think may be going on is called Wolff Parkinson White Syndrome. It’s a condition in which the conduction system in your heart misfires and sends you into SVT. Luckily enough it’s easily treated with a heart ablation surgery, but you will have to go through the steps of a formal diagnosis before going through with that as this is just a guess. Do you have any questions for me?”

You looked at the doctor for a moment, your eyes wide as you shook your head no, unsure why you did it, but in your state of shock you didn’t know what else to do. You were sure whatever research Spencer does on the condition would answer any of your later questions anyway. Through the ringing in your ears you of course heard Spencer’s muffled voice asking the doctor as many questions as he could think of after reading through the education packet, but you paid no attention as you thought of the implications this might have on your job and life as a whole…

What felt like only a few moments passed in the fog of noise and chaos in your brain before you were gently pulled back to reality by Spencer’s soothing voice as he called out your name to get your attention. “What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?” he asked when your eyes finally met with his concerned ones. 

“Too much… I don’t wanna think about it right now…” you whispered, a tear slipping from your eye as an array of emotions blasted through your body. He pulled you into a hug and rubbed your back, not pushing the topic further for the moment. 

Wanting a change in subject, you cleared your throat and focused on work, asking, “Did we get him? The unsub?”

As Spencer pulled away and tried to discreetly wipe a tear from his cheek, he laughed incredulously before saying, “All thanks to you.”

“Good. At least he’s put away now,” you said, relaxing as much as you could into the stiff hospital bed. 

Spencer looked at you and shook his head in disbelief as he said, “Only you could be told your heart stopped practically twice and that you may need surgery to fix it and you’re still more concerned about if we caught the unsub or not.” 

“What can I say, I was passionate about putting that one away,” you said, forcing a small smile on your face. 

Spencer for the first time in a while was at a loss of words for what else to say on the subject, so instead he simply whispered, “I love you,” before leaning forward to place a chaste kiss to your lips. 

The two of you quickly broke away from each other when you heard a squeal and something hitting the floor behind Spencer. When you both looked over to identify the sound, you saw your team standing in the room holding various gifts as well as your go-bag and some palatable food for breakfast. “You two! I- We- You-!” Penelope stuttered out as her eyes darted from your face to Spencer’s and back. She quickly crouched down and picked up what turned out to be a pack of makeup removing wipes before asking, “When did this happen?!”

“My man!” Derek said with a sly smile on his face as he went over to clap Spencer on the back.

“I- We can explain!” Spencer said, a bit of desperation in his voice as he watched Hotch place his get well balloon down on the table before walking out of the room. 

Spencer took one look at the returning terrified look on your face before starting to stand up to go after Hotch, but stopped when David placed a hand on his shoulder to stop his movement. “I’ll deal with it in a minute, kid. You stay with her.”

After a few moments of tense silence, you managed to say, “Surprise?” as Spencer once again resumed holding your hand. 

JJ laughed quietly as she sat down on the couch in the room, asking, “Like Garcia said, when did this happen?”

“Just over a year ago,” Spencer replied, squeezing your hand as his smile once again appeared. 

“A year?!” Penelope and JJ asked at the same time, their eyes wide in shock. 

David laughed and shook his head before asking, “And how did anyone else not notice?”

“In my defense, I thought it was an unspoken rule not to profile each other,” JJ mumbled, shaking her head in disbelief. 

“It’s not profiling if it’s obvious,” David said with a chuckle. He leaned over and placed a kiss to the top of your head before telling you, “Rest up and get to feeling better, you scared us all.”

“Yes sir,” you replied, huffing out a laugh as you watched him exit the room followed soon after by the rest of the team who gave you their well wishes too. “Well I guess that cat’s out of the bag now…” you whispered, pulling your blanket closer to your body as your anxiety began to creep in. 

“Hey, we’ll figure it out,” Spencer reassured you, his eyes flicking up to the heart monitor and noticing that your rate was beginning to climb. He squeezed your hand as he said, “Right now we just need to focus on figuring out if you have that condition the cardiologist mentioned. Dave is talking with Hotch and I’ll talk with him soon too, okay?” 

He gently lifted your chin and mumbled, “Deep breaths, sweetheart…” You simply nodded in response as you closed your eyes and tried to breathe in time with him to calm your racing heart and mind. 

After a few moments, Spencer reached over you and grabbed the pack of makeup wipes and took one out, starting to bring it to your face, which prompted you to ask, “What’re you doing, Spence?”

“I’m helping you take your makeup off,” he replied simply as he began to gently run the wipe over your jawline. “I know you hate when you get acne from your makeup when we're busy with cases…”

“I can do it, love, I’m sure you’ve been up all night and you need rest too,” you told him, gently grabbing his wrist to stop his movement. 

“I don’t mind,” he told you with a small smile on his lips. “This gives me an excuse to admire your beautiful features…”

You could feel yourself blushing as you mumbled, “You’ve had my features memorized intimately since around two months into our relationship.”

“And I’ll never tire of your beauty,” he told you as he coaxed your hand off of his wrist and began gently working the makeup off your face. 

“Je t’aime, Doctor Reid. You always know how to make me feel better,” you whispered a few minutes later when the last makeup wipe was discarded. 

“I love you too, sweetheart,” he replied, placing a gentle kiss on your lips once more. 

When you were cleared to discharge the next morning, the rest of the BAU had already flown back home. Hotch offered to send the jet back to get the two of you, but knowing that they could be called out on a case, Spencer declined, also citing to him, “People with unstable heart disease and arrhythmias have the risk of deadly episodes while in the air due to the pressure changes within the cabin as well as the lower oxygen levels and higher risk of dehydration, not to mention the added stress both physically and emotionally.”

“Is that your way of telling me you’re just renting a car to get back?” Hotch asked and the pair of you could practically see him pinching the bridge of his nose as he asked this. 

“Yes sir,” Spencer replied shortly. “If anything comes up feel free to call. We’ll both get our paperwork done before coming back to the office.”

“Thank you,” he said simply before hanging up. 

Since he hadn’t wanted to leave your side, Spencer hadn’t gotten the chance to speak with Hotch about your relationship and over the phone it was hard to tell what the annoyance in his tone was over… As you began to think about those implications, Spencer glanced over at you before taking your hand in his and saying, “You’re working yourself up again…”

“I’m just scared is all…” you mumbled as the pair of you followed the rental car agent to the car you would be taking back to Virginia. 

Once you were both in the car after Spencer inspected it for cleanliness, he took your hand in his and kissed your knuckles, reiterating to you, “We’re going to figure it out. David said he thinks Hotch will come around, and if you’re worried about your heart, we’ve already got your appointment scheduled for when we get back home. Whatever happens we’ll take it on together like we always do.”

“Thank you, Spence,” you whispered, tears welling up in your eyes once more. You felt like you had done more than enough crying in the past few days, even though there had been more than one occasion when Spencer had rattled off some facts about crying being a great form of stress relief. 

Walking into headquarters a few days later, you tugged at your shirt uncomfortably as you and Spencer stepped into the elevator together. You had been to the doctor the day before and they had attached you to a 24-hour heart monitor that they would use to aid in your diagnosis, and you’d be lying if you said all the wires didn’t cause you to be filled with an overwhelming feeling of insecurity. 

Taking note of your shifting, Spencer asked quietly, “Would you like to wear my jacket?”

“And give Hotch another reason to let me go?” you rebutted, your voice breaking at the end. 

“That’s not going to happen,” Spencer reassured you as the doors to the elevator opened and you two walked out and toward the BAU offices. 

It definitely felt that way though when the first thing you heard when emerging into the bullpen was Hotch calling both of your last names and saying, “You two, my office.”

Feeling like two teenagers caught in the act, when Spencer closed the door behind him, he immediately started rambling. “Hotch, please I can explain, we-”

“I don’t need an explanation, I need you to sign these forms,” your unit chief said, handing the both of you a packet of papers that you began reading even though the papers shook with the tremors in your hands. 

“If you just give me a second to-” Spencer tried again as he took the packet but didn’t so much as glance at it. 

“Sign the papers,” Hotch said, ignoring Spencer’s pleas for him to listen. 

“But-”

“Spence, read it,” you said a few moments later after you had read the summary of the form on the front page of the packet. 

At your words, Spencer finally looked down at the packet in his hands and within moments had it read, his mouth opening a little in shock as he asked Hotch, “Wait…you’re not mad?”

“Oh I’m mad. I’m mad that you two would keep such a secret from us, not only because I thought we functioned as a family here, but also because of how much your relationship played a role in that Tennessee case," Hotch told him sternly. "Seeing as even I never noticed before now and up until that case, it has never interfered with your work, I asked around and came up with some forms that should appease the higher-ups if for some reason this relationship were to get out to other teams.”

“So if we sign these forms then we’re both allowed to stay on the team as long as it doesn’t interfere with our work?” Spencer asked, slightly breathlessly. 

“Correct,” Hotch replied, the corners of his mouth almost tugging up into a smile. “We can’t afford to lose either one of you from this team.”

“Well that’s a relief…” you mumbled as you grabbed a pen out of the cup sitting on his desk and signed the paper in the appropriate places. 

“No more secrets, okay?” Hotch asked sternly as he eyed the two of you, pointing his own pen at each of you in turn. 

“No more secrets,” you both agreed, giggles flying out of both of your mouths as you looked at each other after saying the same phrase. 

“So when’s the wedding?” Derek asked with a chuckle as the two of you emerged from the office once everything was filed away. 

“Once we get her heart situation figured out because I know she’ll want to go to Europe for the honeymoon,” Spencer replied as he pulled you close and placed a kiss on your forehead. The statement made your heart leap in your chest and you began to think of excuses to tell the cardiologist about what caused that reading on the monitor. 

So with your job at the BAU still secure, you took a seat at your desk across from Spencer’s and sipped at the decaf coffee JJ had bought for the break room, completely grateful for the team, but even more so for Spencer. You weren’t sure how you would navigate this crazy and unpredictable life without him.

[murkycran]

Alastor, Vox, and Smiles

Sooo I noticed in Episode 2 when we're introduced to Vox's character for the first time he spends a considerable amount of time forcibly putting on a smile when around other people.

For the cameras

Then for Velvette

And then when trying to calm Valentino down

Now that we have confirmation that Vox and Alastor used to be friends* because of the torn photo, Alastor's speech to Charlie about smiling to put up a facade for various reasons just highlights the similarities between Alastor and Vox. Almost like they have the same philosophy and tactics when it comes to manipulating those around them, huh?

(*I say "friends" because you don't just have pictures taken with mere "acquaintances", tear the so-called acquaintance out of the picture when mad, and then keep the torn photo for years and years. Vox didn't even throw away the torn part, the whole point of tearing someone out of a picture is to get rid of them and he straight up kept Alastor's torn half of the picture lol. And I don't think they were ever business partners because Alastor said "no" to "joining Vox's team". Plus, I highly doubt Vox would be as vehemently pissed off at Alastor if they were just acquaintances... So I feel like they were at the very least friends. Maybe even more than friends...)

Alastor is undoubtedly better than Vox at maintaining the facade, but still... I just think it's interesting that they share such a similar philosophy for interacting with others. Add to it that Alastor clearly knows how to press Vox's buttons (heh) so well that he can send him into a blackout and it's just more and more evident that they used to be close at one point. Close enough for Alastor to teach Vox some of his tricks for manipulation or Vox to pick up the same habits.

[goldfades]

I���m just saying…. headcannons for paige with a bestfriend to partner who’s an introvert.

And I mean those introverts who seem quiet but the moment they get comfortable around you it’s over, but like only they get to see that side.

Paige seems like an extrovert that adopts introverts, like just imagine her having to drag her partner out of their room all the time cuz they’re a damn hermit.

-🐹

─ warnings | mention of drinking, teasing, fluff, nothin' else?

─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson @euphternal and here's a link to my taglist if anyone would like to join!!

honestly, you are so right in that assumption

she definitely gets closer with more introverted people, bc opposites DO really attract

when you guys first met it was your freshman year at uconn, at first you'd probably think she's WAY too much ─ maybe even cocky LOL (but who can blame her she's the best)

but when you spend more one on one time with her, you realize she's really funny and sweet

because you're so quiet, paige would be naturally drawn to you cus she gets to know you

so she just pesters you until you eventually give in and hang out with her

from that point on, the one is never seen without the other

you guys would always be together

but like... usually, you're just WITH paige so people don't really acknowledge you cus you're so quiet

but then paige would like force you to socialize

"this is y/n, i promise she's fun you just gotta put a little liquor in her-" "PAIGE."

she would push you toward her close friends the most, def like ice, azzi, nika and kk

ESPECIALLY kk!

and then you eventually would get really close with them, you all have your cute little friend group

you and ice would make fun of paige and kk together, you and azzi are kinda similar so you find yourself hanging out with her alone a lot more, and nika would force you out your shell a lot too

after a couple months of being friends, paige would definitely find herself catching feels

like i've said in my other headcanons, she just thinks you're such a big source of comfort for her and it slowly just becomes full-on adoration cus

she adores you

and you compliment her personality so well she is just like "i NEED to have her right now"

she ends up confessing one night after a really terrible game and then y'all kiss ...

and the rest is history 🤗🤗🤗

jk here's some relationship headcanons

again, you are so right nonnie

like i mentioned, one is never seen without the other

so you're always tied at the hip, especially at parties

at first she has to force you

like FULL force

she calls backup ofc ice and kk come and then its 3 vs 1

they end up winning

and this happens time and time again, you just get so worn down you'd rather just endure the damn party then listen to all three of them scream at you

which was the goal 🥰

and you're definitely the sober one 95% of the time so you will be taking care of a very drunk paige

(maybe some separate headcanons for her if yall want)

and sometimes even ice/kk but it's mostly just your girlfriend

anyway, yeah you take her home, take of her and then get her into bed

and when you try to leave she will be so dramatic, she forces you to stay with her

you don't mind cus you love cuddly paige

but the 5% when you're the one who's blackout drunk, paige is gonna take such good care of you

because you're so introverted when you're sober, you're probably gonna be such a rowdy drunk

yes im her shes me

so paige makes sure you don't get into trouble and gets you home safe and sound

but if you do something stupid, she will never ever let you live it down

"remember that time you jumped into the pool and-" "SHUT THE FUCK UP"

↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !

↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[whatsnewalycat]

Designated Person | 10

Pairing: Francisco “Catfish” Morales x F!Reader

Chapter 10: Flat Tire

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Word Count: 6.9k+ (nice)

Tags / Warnings: reader pov, infidelity, past romantic & sexual relationship, angst, food & eating, blackout, movie references, car problems, alcohol & alcoholism, 12-step programs, lying, conflict avoidance, crying crying crying sorry, internal conflict, monologue, toxic relationships but listen we're tryna get better, journal entries, nightmares, ptsd, flashback

Notes: WHAT UP PARTY PEOPLE?? MAKE SOME NOIIIISE (insert dallas buyers club matthew mcconaughey scream crying in his car). Sorry for being a bummer lol sometimes growth hurts but we're gonna get thru this I swear. Ok thank u let me know what you think!!!

[ Previous Chapter ][ Series Masterlist ][ My Masterlist ]

-----

Blackouts work like magic. 

One second you’re perched on a barstool, trying not to sway or slur your words while ordering another drink, and the next you’re jolted awake by the thud of a door closing. 

Heart pounding in your chest, you sit up and look around, breathing a sigh of relief to see you somehow made it to your bedroom last night. 

You grab your phone off the side table, swiping away the missed calls from Frankie and Leah, then discover that you apparently re-downloaded a dating app in your alcohol-induced fugue state. Judging by the number of reply messages in your inbox, you must have hit up every man in the tri-county area who was “looking for a good time.”

Perfect. Of course you did. Why wouldn’t you? Bad decisions and dick has never ever steered you wrong. 

You read one typo-filled exchange between yourself and Russ K, 34, before deactivating the account and uninstalling the app. 

When you set your phone back on the nightstand, you notice a mason jar filled with ice water and frown. Beside it sits a small plastic container holding four neon orange tablets and two white tablets. A sticky note on the table reads ‘Went to a meeting, be back this afternoon’ in Frankie’s handwriting. 

Alarm trickles through your veins and inspires a wave of nausea you can’t ignore. Clasping your hand over your mouth to hold down the rising bile, you jump out of bed and beeline to the bathroom. 

After emptying the sparse contents of your stomach into the toilet, you lean back against the cool tile wall and search the ceiling for answers. How did you get home last night? Did you say anything to Frankie? 

You think about the ice water and over-the-counter pills left on your nightstand, then think about the note Frankie left. However you got home, he must know you were hammered. Which means you definitely interacted with him while blacked out. Do you even want to know what you said to him? 

Mortification twists your stomach when you imagine the possibilities. You could have tried to fuck him or murder him or anything in between. Given how you feel about him right now, it’s impossible to predict. That fact alone makes your mouth start to sweat again. 

So… no, you don’t want to know what you said to him when you were drunk. You don’t want to know how you got home or why the fuck your hair is damp. All you want is to get through this fucking day without hurling again. Maybe greasy food and a NASCAR nap, too. 

With this new clear goal in mind, you pick yourself up off the bathroom floor and set about making your low-stakes dream a reality. 

—

You wake on the couch to the soothing lull of commentators giving a play-by-play of the Rays versus Yankees game. A thick web of fatigue clings to you, fighting against your efforts to open your eyes and sit upright. 

“Hey.” 

Instinctively, you look towards the noise at the other end of the couch, locking eyes with Frankie. His face droops with this wounded expression that gets under your skin. Diverting your gaze to the TV, you cross your arms and try to keep your demeanor aloof despite the deep ache in your chest. 

“How are you feeling?” 

You choke out a humorless laugh and shake your head, keeping your eyes trained on the screen. A few tense seconds go by before he accepts that you will not be answering his ludicrous question, so he takes an alternative approach. 

“I brought home cubanos from that place you like. For, um… for family dinner. If you still wanted to do that.” 

Home, he says, as if the word meant something to him. As if he didn’t match every brick you laid in the foundation of this relationship with paper mache blocks. As if he didn’t take a wrecking ball to whole fucking thing regardless. 

Maybe to him home is just a place he rests his head at night, not where he anchors his heart. A matter of physical location rather than a feeling. You, on the other hand… never felt quite at home in this house until he started living here. 

Are you crazy for having felt like that? Like home was a space you held with him and him alone? 

Your parents were right. You make too much of things. You’re overdramatic. 

Why would he love you? Why would he choose you over his wife? You knew what you were getting into when this started. 

Stupid girl. 

“I understand if you don’t want to, though.” 

His voice brings you back to yourself. You blink hot tears from your eyes, then wipe them from your cheeks, trying to hold yourself together despite the whisper of ‘stupid girl stupid girl stupid girl’ at the back of your head. 

“Can we… can we at least talk about it?” 

You wince as a fresh batch of tears surges up your throat. Rising to your feet, you shake your head and manage to choke out, “Just forget it,” before fleeing to your bedroom. 

—

I slept most of the day yesterday so it took me forever to fall asleep. Also Frankie was walking around the house all night. At 11ish, I heard him talking on the phone, then I think someone picked him up. I texted him to see where he went because I’m unfortunately still his designated person. He said he was with someone from AA and he’d be back soon, just needed to talk. I couldn’t fall asleep until I heard him come in at 1. He wasn’t stumbling around so I’m guessing he was sober??? Hopefully he was. I don’t want this to get in the way of his recovery. Which I sort of hate. I wish I could delete the feelings I have for him. I wish I didn’t care. But I guess I do, so… I don’t know. This fucking sucks. Leah said I should kick him out, but I don’t want to fuck up his program. Maybe I’ll talk to Ralph today and see what he thinks. The thing is… the more people I talk to, the more I just want to talk to Frankie. Nobody makes me feel like he does. More than the lies, this is what bothers me the most. The fact that I can feel this way and he just doesn’t. I don’t understand how he can’t feel it, too. I thought this was real. But I guess I always do. I guess he’s just a really good liar and I am just a stupid girl. 

Tossing the notebook aside, you sit up to grab your mug off the side table. Wisps of steam rise from the coffee and dissolve into the air. The image blurs as a thick, wretched sensation twists up your throat. 

God fucking damnit. 

Every time you think you have no more tears left to cry, you prove yourself wrong. They just keep coming. Yesterday you waded in and out of these sudden fits where crying was all you could do. It reminds you of all the other times he broke your heart, but especially the last time. 

After Angie caught the two of you fucking, part of you hoped that maybe she would leave him. From what you understand, though, he convinced her to stay. Called you a mistake. An ‘isolated incident’ or whatever. Fucking asshole. 

Anyway. 

Seeing each other became logistically and emotionally difficult. Participating in an affair is much easier when it’s still a secret, for obvious reasons. He tried to see you when he could, which wasn’t nearly as frequent as you wanted. When you did see him, he was drunk. You’d pick him up from the bar, or he’d come over after Angie went to bed, but he was always at least five drinks in and counting. 

You bailed him out of jail twice in those six months. Once for drinking and driving, once for getting in a fight over a fucking pool game, of all things. 

He seemed so walled-off from you, too. Like he detached from his emotions when he saw you. Maybe it was because of the liquor, but a million other reasons are just as likely. After sex, he would leave. The sex was… well, it was still good, but… different. Rougher, impersonal. It felt less like making love and more like fucking. 

You still loved him, though. You still had fantasies of having a real, normal relationship with him. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, you still wanted to believe that he was meant to be with you. 

Stupid girl stupid girl stupid girl

And then, well… 

Your phone starts to ring. It’s Ralph. 

You take a few quick sips of your coffee, then set the mug aside to answer. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, kiddo. Do you have a minute?” 

His tone, less jovial than normal, gives you a small burst of anxious energy.

“Sure, what’s up?” 

“I just got off the phone Mr. Morales and he briefed me on the, ahhh… situation over there.” 

Unsure what to say, you fold an arm over your belly and stare down at your lap. 

“I understand that things are a bit tense due to an incident that occurred on Saturday, is that correct?” 

“Yeah,” you nod, voice wavering, “Yeah, I, um… I overheard him talking to Angie, and… well, basically I found out he’s been lying to me.” 

It sounds so pathetic when you say it out loud. 

“Uh-huh. He lied about the nature of his relationship with Mrs. Morales.” 

“Correct.” 

You prepare for Ralph to tell you it’s not a big deal. Brace yourself for the inevitable scoff, or for him to accuse you of overreacting. 

So he lied to you, so what? You knew who he was. You knew he had a family to keep together. You should have known better than to get involved with him. Stupid girl, why would you put yourself in that position in the first place? 

“And this isn’t the first time he lied to you about this particular matter, am I understanding correctly?” 

“Well…” you frown and shake your head, “No, not really. When we were together before, he was pretty explicit that he wouldn’t leave her. I just… I just thought… I don’t know. It’s dumb. I’m fucking dumb.” 

Ralph doesn’t respond right away, so you add, “Sorry. I’m still in my feelings.” 

“Don’t sweat it, I think I’m picking up what you’re putting down,” he pauses here to clear his throat, then recounts, “Before, he told you leaving her wasn’t a possibility. And despite my warning going into this, the two of you re-established your romantic relationship, he told you that kind of relationship was effectively over with his wife. Which wasn’t true.” 

“Correct.” 

“Ok. Got it. Has Mr. Morales exhibited any unusual or suspicious behavior since the incident on Saturday?”

After thinking about it, you tell him, “I wouldn’t call this suspicious exactly, but yesterday he left a note saying he was going to an AA meeting, which isn’t normal. And late last night someone picked him up. I texted him to check in and he said he was with someone from AA, talking.” 

“Do you believe he was being truthful?” 

“Yeah, I do,” you shrug, “I mean, I’m obviously not the best at detecting his bullshit, but I’ve seen him under the influence more times than I can count and he didn’t seem… like that.” 

“Well, that’s good. And it’s good you checked in with him, I take that as a positive. You are still responsible for him while he’s on parole.” He sighs, “Which brings me to my next question. Are you thinking you want to continue serving as his designated person, or should we start looking for alternatives?” 

A lump rises in your throat. You swallow it down, wincing at the tears that burn behind your eyes, “I, um… I’m not sure yet. Can I have a few days to think it over?” 

“Sure. How about this. Why don’t you take some time, maybe go to one of those Al-Anon meetings I told you about, and I can stop by Saturday to have a sit down with you and Mr. Morales. Does that sound agreeable?” 

“Ok,” you nod, “Yeah, that sounds good. We can do that.”

“Alrighty then. I’ll shoot you an email with some details sometime today and we’ll go from there.” 

“Thanks, Ralph.” 

“Call me if anything comes up, ok kiddo?” 

“Will do.” 

After hanging up, you put in a load of laundry and wander around the house, stopping by the fridge to stare at the cubano Frankie brought home for you yesterday. You roll your eyes with annoyance as you grab it, then you return to the couch and put on Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. 

—

By the time Frankie comes home, you’re four feature films deep in your angsty post-breakup movie marathon and feeling indignant enough not to surrender the common space to him. 

His eyebrows do this little surprised jump when your eyes meet his, and he glances at the TV, “Reality Bites?” 

You don’t respond, just curl deeper into the couch and return your attention to Ethan Hawke’s spiteful cover of Add It Up.

He kicks off his work boots and walks into the kitchen, coming back a minute later to ask, “If I make something for dinner, will you eat it?” 

Your stomach rumbles at the thought of food. Without looking at him, you shrug. 

Accepting the non-verbal answer, Frankie returns to the kitchen and starts bumbling around, cussing and grumbling under his breath. Eventually, though, he seems to get the hang of it. 

Just as the end credits of Reality Bites start rolling, he enters the living room holding two plates and sets one on the coffee table for you, then takes a seat at the opposite end of the couch. 

You sit up, crossing your legs as you pull the offering into your lap, and toss the remote control to his side of the dividing cushion. He wordlessly searches for something else to watch while you study the avocado-filled hot dog buns. 

“What is this?” you ask. 

“Completo. Hot dog topped with good shit, basically. Avocado, tomato, onion, condiments.” He selects play on Moulin Rouge, then looks at you and shrugs, “Ma would make it for me when I had a bad day.” 

You stare at him for a moment, then roll your eyes and shake your head as you turn to the TV, “I see what you’re doing.” 

“What’s that?” 

“Kissing my ass.” 

He chuckles, shifting a little, “Yeah, well… yeah.” 

The movie starts to play. You don’t mention that this will be the second time you’ve seen it today because he probably knows that. After taking a bite of the completo, you hum at the mix of flavors and textures as you chew. 

“Good, right?” Frankie says through a mouthful. 

“Mmm,” you nod in agreement. 

He swallows, glancing between you and his food before asking, “Can I ask why you haven’t kicked me out yet?”

When you contemplate how to answer, the reasons all snarl into a tight knot of which you can’t quite make heads or tails. 

“No.” 

“Fair enough,” he murmurs, letting his gaze linger on you, “Do you want me to give you some privacy, or…? Because I can go—” 

“It doesn’t matter, Francisco, just stop talking.” 

“Ok, but—” 

You hold your hand up to him, “Shhhhhh.”

He sighs, but accepts the silence. Tension resides in the air at first, but slowly dissipates as you clear your plates, then settle into the couch. And although your eyes stay trained on the screen, you can’t make yourself pay attention. 

You keep wondering why he lied about being with Angie. He’s never had a problem making that clear in the past, even if it meant breaking your heart. Is it because he lives with you? It’s possible he didn’t want to risk getting kicked out, so he kept it a secret. 

Then why get involved with you again? Did he think this was the best way to stay in your good graces? Has he been manipulating you this whole time? 

It’s possible. It’s also possible you’re another one of his bad habits he can’t kick. A coping mechanism. Disposable, like always. 

You remember the night you asked him to come over so you could talk to him about something important. He promised to be there at eight o’clock, which is when you planted yourself on the front porch swing to wait for him. At nine o’clock, his truck came rumbling down the street and parked in front of the house. 

“What’re you doing out here?” he smirked as he climbed the porch steps. 

“Waiting for you,” you glared at him, observing his fluid movements when he plopped down beside you.

“I went and got a drink, lost track of time.” 

He wrapped an arm around your shoulders and drew your stiff body closer to kiss your cheek.

Something hot flared in your chest, and you distinctly remember wishing he would show up sober for once. This wasn’t the scab you wanted to pick, though. 

He tilted your chin up, pressing his lips to yours, breath heavy with whiskey, then pulled back to frown at your lackluster response. His body swayed a little as he studied you, “What?” 

“I need to talk to you.” 

“Ok,” he leaned away from you with a scoff, “Well, I’m here. Talk to me. Tell me how I fucked up this time.” 

You winced, “Don’t do that.” 

Crossing his arms, he stared at you, all fucking wobbly and drunk, irritation folding his facial features. He shrugged, “Do what?” 

“That! You’re being an asshole.” 

“Oh, I’m being an asshole?” he mocked, “How’s that?” 

Rage simmered beneath your skin. You let out a chuckle of disbelief, shaking your head as tears pooled in your eyes. After taking a moment to gather yourself, you spit out, “Do you love me?” 

“Do I—?” he furrowed his brow like he didn’t understand, shifting in his seat, “Do I love you?” 

“Yes, Frankie. Do you fucking love me or not?” 

His indignation melted. Shoulders slumping, gaze going soft. He swallowed hard and looked out at the street as if searching for an escape hatch. Emergency brake. Make it stop. 

“Because I love you. I’ve been in love with you for so long… and-and I still don’t know what the fuck I am to you.” 

He seemed frozen, staring at something a million miles away without sparing a reaction. 

Nine months later, you can still feel the frantic vibration of your bones when you moved closer and cupped his cheeks, forcing him to look at you. When his eyes met yours, they were so cold and vacant that you barely recognized him. You tried to get through anyway. 

“I need you right now, Frankie. But I need all of you. I can’t be on the back burner anymore. I need you to be with me or I need to let you go.” 

“You know I can’t do that. I can’t be with you, not like that.” 

“But you could, though. You could. We could do this, we could make it work, start a life together—”

“I won’t leave her,” he shook his head, “I have a family—goddamnit, you knew what this was when it started.”

You sobbed, letting your hands fall away from his face, and his eyelids fluttered with the ghost of an emotion that you didn’t understand. 

He started, “I don’t—” then paused, tapping his clamped lips. His bloodshot eyes flicked around the porch and settled a million miles away again, “I don’t love you.” 

With this declaration, he took his chisel to you, lined it up in just the right spot, and gave it one firm tap. You crumbled at his feet. Shattered into dust. 

He got up and drove off while you were still bawling on the front porch swing. 

Onscreen, Toulouse-Lautrec shouts, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return!” 

It hits you square in the chest. 

With tears brimming your eyelids, you jump up and flee to your bedroom before he can see them. 

—

Terrible nights sleep. Every time I drifted off, I was in the bedroom at my parents house but it wasn’t in my parents house. He was there but he wasn’t there. I don’t know how to explain it. I felt his presence but knew it wasn't him. I kept my eyes closed because I was scared to see, but I could hear him getting closer and closer. When I opened my eyes I woke up. The feeling stuck to me. It took me forever to fall back asleep and when I did it started over. 

Frankie didn’t go to work this morning. I don’t think he slept well either. Heard him walking around all night again. Idk if I should ask him what his deal is. I don’t want to talk to him about it yet and he’ll probably try to do that. Which is weird for him. A year ago I’d give anything for him to open up like he’s been trying to. But it hurts too much right now. It’s so messy. I’m all tangled. I need to straighten myself out before talking about it. 

I think I’m going to an al-anon meeting today and I’m nervous. Not sure what to expect. Keep worrying they’ll tell me I don’t belong there or make me talk about him. I don’t know if I belong there. I don’t know if I belong anywhere. 

Pulling back from your notebook, you stare at the last sentence for a while before closing the cover and setting it on the end table. 

Frankie walks out from his bedroom and rounds the corner to the living room, looking suspiciously formal, wearing slacks and a white dress shirt. His dark curls have been combed into a neat side part. It even looks like he trimmed his facial hair. 

As he peeks through the front window curtains, you blurt, “Are you wearing a fucking tie?” 

He looks surprised to hear you speak, raising his eyebrows as he glances down at himself, then up at you, “Yeah. I have a uhhh… a deposition today.” 

“Is that good or bad?” 

“Not really either. It’s normal, I guess. They’re just asking me questions on the record.” 

Nodding, you study his nervous demeanor, watching him reflexively go to lift his hat, faltering a little before running his fingers through his hair anyway. 

A desire to comfort him trickles through you, extinguishing the glowing embers of contempt inside your chest. 

“How is the case going, do you know?” 

The corner of his mouth pulls back into a kind of grimace. He takes another peek out the window, then steps back and shrugs as he approaches the couch, “The lawyer says they’ll probably offer a plea deal once this is over. We’ll see what that looks like.” He sits down at the other end of the couch, pulling out his phone to keep an eye on the little car on his rideshare app, “He thinks maybe they could agree to a reduced sentence.” 

You pick at your frayed cuticles, holding your tongue for as long as you can before asking, “How are you doing with… everything?” 

When you glance at him, his face is crooked with contemplation. He shifts in his seat and crosses his arms, lips parting with an answer. A notification dings on his phone. 

“My ride’s here,” he murmurs and meets your eyes with an apologetic expression, “We can talk about it later?” 

You give him a non-committal smile, “Good luck at your thing.” 

—

The woman who gave you your new member packet, apparently the leader of the meeting, looks around the room and announces,

“This afternoon, our fearless speaker will be Taylor. Everybody please welcome Taylor.”

From the back row, you sink down in your metal folding chair and glance around at the attendees, joining in when they start to clap for a woman approaching the podium. 

“Hi everyone, my name is Taylor. I’m a member of Al-Anon.” 

The room responds in unison, “Hi Taylor.” 

Taylor smiles and shakes her head, looking down at a small stack of trembling notecards. Her round shoulders raise with a deep breath. She closes her eyes for a moment, exhales, then looks up at the room. 

“If you would’ve told me a year ago I’d be the speaker at an Al-Anon group, there’s no way I’d believe you. But here I am,” she chuckles, “Wow. Thank you everyone for coming in today. I see so many familiar faces and some not so familiar faces and I’m grateful to see all of you. I’m proud of you for coming to this meeting today. 

“One of the biggest preconceived notions I had when I started attending Al-Anon meetings nine months ago is that they would help me support my alcoholic husband. At the time, he was about a month into sobriety and had just started going to AA meetings. He was struggling like hell and a friend of his asked if he wanted to go to an AA meeting with him. So he did. 

“I’ll be honest, when he suggested I go to Al-Anon, I was annoyed. I really was. At that point, we’d been married for five years. He tried quitting, oh, I don’t know… six times in that five years? Three 90-day inpatient rehab stays, two arrests, more sleepless nights than I can count.” 

Taylor pauses and looks down at her notes, then back up at the room as an amused smile spreads across her face. 

“What it always reminded me of was this story my husband told me. Every so often, he goes through these phases where he gets very very interested in a particular subject. It completely takes him over. All he wants to do is read about it and talk about it and… well, you get it. 

“When he was in his Greek mythology era, he told me about Sisyphus, the king of Ephyra. Sisyphus killed people who visited his palace, which angered the gods because they considered it impolite, which is the understatement of the millennium, but that’s neither here nor there. When Sisyphus died, Hades punished him to an eternity rolling a boulder uphill. He would fight his way up this steep hill, pushing the boulder with all his might. The boulder was enchanted, though, and every time the it got near the top, the boulder would roll back down the hill, then he’d have to try again. So he does this over and over and over for eternity. Infinite frustration and exhaustion. 

“Sometimes it felt like that with him. With my alcoholic. Like I was stuck in this loop, fighting like hell to push his dead weight to the top of the hill. Just when I got a scrap of hope, it went tumbling back down. Over and over and over again. I structured my whole life around his relationship to alcohol. Checking in with him constantly, making sure I didn’t say or do anything that might trigger another relapse, putting myself on the back burner to accommodate his needs. So when he suggested I try going to Al-Anon meetings, I expected it to be another chore catering to his sobriety. I thought I would come here and learn all the ways people support the alcoholic in their life the right way. Because I obviously wasn’t doing it the right way. If I was, he would have years of sobriety under his belt. 

“Regardless, I agreed to go, and quickly discovered my preconceived notions about Al-Anon were wrong. Al-Anon doesn’t exist for us to better service the alcoholic or alcoholics in our lives. Sure, we’re all here because of the alcoholic in our lives, but the point is to better service ourselves. I think that distinction is important. 

“When I came home from my first meeting, I went through the new member packet Mario gave me, and found a handout that said: Detachment is neither kind nor unkind,” Taylor nods at the memory and looks around the room, “That struck a chord with me, that phrase. Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It didn’t make sense to me at first. I thought, how is detachment neither kind nor unkind? It went against my instincts completely. How was I supposed to help my husband if I detached from him? Isn’t love about being attached to someone, sticking together through thick and thin? 

“Attending meetings and working the steps helped me get a better grasp on the concept. I came to understand that, in Al-Anon, detachment can mean two different things. The first is separating the person you love from their alcoholic behaviors. The second is a little harder to define, but it centers around the idea that you are separate from other people, and their actions do not control yours. Let me show you what I mean, though.

“In my relationship with my husband, we were entangled,” Taylor laces her hands together and holds them up for everyone to see. “Wherever he went, I went, too.” She moves her clasped hands back and forth. Spreading her hands apart, she says, “I didn’t want to be apart from him. But what I found with detachment is,” she flattens her hands palm-to-palm, “We can be close without being entangled. That way, if he goes to a dark place,” she moves one hand away from the other and shakes her head, “I don’t have to go with him if I don’t want to.” 

Taylor looks around the room, allowing her words to sink in, then returns her attention to the stack of notecards and flips to the next. 

“When we detach in this way, it both relieves us of our perceived responsibility for their actions and emotions, and grants them autonomy to make their own choices. They deserve dignity and freedom, which is difficult to obtain if we try to manage their lives. 

“So often in our marriage, I thought that loving my alcoholic meant rescuing him from himself. I thought that if I exerted myself hard enough, pushed him up that steep hill long enough, we would get to the top together. But the effort was Sisyphean. It didn’t matter how much time or effort I put into controlling the direction of the boulder. It would always roll downhill, because the boulder was enchanted. Even if I spent an eternity trying, even if I begged and screamed and pleaded with the boulder, it would still be enchanted. And, you know… maybe that’s ok. Maybe he’s not meant to sit at the top of the hill. It’s not his fault, either, and I came to realize that instead of getting frustrated at him for being enchanted, I can meet him where he is and love him anyway. If I don’t like that place, I don’t have to stay there. When I detach with love, I grant myself autonomy as well as him. 

“Putting the metaphor aside, I’ve used this in practice by no longer lying for him. If he’s at an AA meeting and our daughter asks why he’s not home, I tell her the truth. When my family or friends ask how everything is going, I don’t try to make it seem easier than it is so he can save face. I confide in them with sincerity because that is what I need. I’ve stopped giving him advice unless he asks for it, because I’ve learned here that most times people don’t need advice, they just need someone to listen and be present. I’ve stopped trying to take the reins when I think he’s making poor decisions, because he doesn’t need someone to do it for him. He needs to learn to do it himself. Part of learning is making mistakes and growing out from beneath the consequences. 

“Detachment is neither kind nor unkind, it’s a tool we utilize to free ourselves and the alcoholic in our lives. Al-Anon doesn’t exist to teach us how to help the alcoholic in our lives, although the tools it gives us can aid in their recovery as well as ours. This fellowship exists to help us, the families of the alcoholic, so that we may lead more joyful and serene lives. Thank you.” 

Applause erupts from the crowd, and you join in, watching Taylor glow with pride as she steps away from the podium. 

—

Damp, hot air pours in through the rolled-down windows, carrying with it the earthy scent of algae-bloom off East Lake Tohopekaliga. Driving along the slow, steady curve, you pass by sprawling oak trees, their eaves all draped in spanish moss. 

Your hope was that taking the scenic route home would clear your head, but it’s not doing the trick. Something shifted inside you during the meeting. You can’t quite put your finger on exactly what shifted or why it happened, although your circular thoughts give you the sense you’re on the precipice of understanding. 

You keep thinking about the speaker, Taylor, and the lesson she relayed from her podium. Her situation is different from yours, but you know it all the same. You know how it feels to dig your heels into the dirt, struggling like hell to push someone in the direction you think is best. You know how it feels to see him tumble to the bottom time and time again. And for what? It’s not like he’s any better off because of your efforts. It’s not like you are, either. 

How many times have you betrayed yourself for the sake of his favor? How many times have you put your needs aside to tend to his? 

Calm blue-gray water flickers behind the trees you drive past. It looks peaceful. Further up the road, you spot a public access point to the lake and turn into the lot, hitting a bump. When you do, a loud BANG reverberates through the car. The steering wheel shakes as you slow to a jerky, lopsided stop.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” you fume, shifting the car into park. Folding forward onto the steering wheel, you pinch your eyes shut and take a deep breath, then exit the vehicle to look at the damage. 

The front driver’s side tire sits flat against the pavement. You stare at it and shake your head, muttering, “God fucking damnit,” before walking to the trunk. 

You open it and pull up the mat to the spare tire well. It’s empty. 

“Fucking of course. Jesus fucking—” 

Cutting yourself off with a furious groan, you pull out your phone and go through your contact list, pointedly scrolling past the F’s to pause at Leah, who’s over an hour away, then Marla, who’s busy enough as it is. You even briefly consider Rory, but the idea makes your stomach lurch. 

You could just do it all yourself. Order a car on one of those rideshare apps. It would take forever, though, and you’ve never changed a tire before. 

Frankie is the logical choice. The first person who came to mind, if you’re being honest. Something hard and stubborn inside your chest throbs when you hover over his name. 

It’s pride, you realize. Maybe a little fear. You don’t want to ask for his help. You don’t want to burden him. You don’t want to be disappointed if he says no. 

All the same, you dial his number. He picks up on the second ring. 

“H—”

“Are you at the house?”  

“I am.” 

“Are you busy?” 

“Nothing I can’t put off ‘til later. Why?” 

“My fucking tire blew out, and my spare is in the garage,” you sigh and throw your head back, propping a hand on your hip, “Is there any way you can bring it out to me?” 

“I, umm… yeah, of course. Where are you?” 

“East Lake Toho.”

He snorts, “Christ, what’re you doing all the way out there?” In the background, you hear the floorboards creaking, mapping his way through the house. Before you can respond, he asks, “Spare tire in the garage, need me to grab anything else?” 

“Uhhhh…” you wrinkle your nose at the trunk, “I don’t know, I have a jack and the tire iron thing.” 

“That should do it. Wanna drop me a pin? I’ll have to get a ride out there.” 

“Yeah. I can pay you back if you need to order a Lyft or whatever.” 

“Just take it off my tab,” he jokes, the back door squeaking open behind his voice, “Hang tight, I’ll be there in a bit.”

You turn around to lean back on the bumper, “Ok, I’ll be here.” 

After hanging up, you share your location with him, then wander down to the dock. It rattles around as you teeter to the end and sit down, letting your feet dangle over the edge. 

Cattails and lily pads have been cleared from the shoreline near the boat landing, giving you a clear view across the lake, broken up here and there by thick swaths of aquatic vegetation. The glassy surface of the water reflects the hazy blue sky, and stagnant air sticks humid to your skin. Insects buzz and birds sing and somewhere far away you hear a boat motor chugging across the lake. 

When you think of serenity, this is what you picture. Stillness and calm. Peace. You inhale the scene, allowing it to stretch out inside you and unfurl your tensed muscles. 

As soon as the unease evaporates from your body, fatigue takes over.  

Lying back on the dock, you stare up at tall, fluffy clouds littering the sky. Your eyelids grow heavy as you watch the slow-moving parade of shifting giants, the warm air lulling you into comfort until you let your eyes drift closed. 

Your awareness fades in and out while you sleep. At one point, a car door shuts, then the car drives off. Vaguely, you know it’s Frankie but can’t lift your limbs, syrupy thick with lethargy. You hear grunts and metallic clattering. Some time later, your trunk slams shut. 

When the dock starts wobbling around beneath you, you blink your eyes open and sit up, scrubbing your hands over your face as a yawn overtakes you. 

“Hey sleepyhead.” 

You glance over your shoulder at Frankie, who comes to sit down beside you with a groan. He’s back to his usual attire, jeans and a t-shirt, baseball cap firmly in place atop his head. 

Still groggy, you yawn, “I couldn’t make myself wake up.” 

“Not sleeping well?” 

“Fucking awful, honestly.” 

“Yeah, I know.” 

You frown at him, searching his face until he gives you a little shrug, at which point you mumble, “Oh. I forgot that I, umm… yeah. Sorry.” 

“No need to apologize,” he tells you, squinting up at the sky before dropping his eyes to his hands as he fiddles with his wedding band, “Same here. The—the sleep part, not the nightmares.” 

“Yeah, I know. I hear you pacing around at night.” 

“Oh… sorry, I didn’t realize—”

You push yourself up straighter to watch his legs dangle next to yours, “It’s fine.” 

Quiet settles comfortably between you. Near the dock, you see a cluster of bubbles rise to the surface of the lake and burst. The ripples flatten out and calm returns. 

A question swells in your ribcage. Just a small pocket of air at first, maybe the size of a pebble. The longer you sit and stare at the water, though, it expands. It works its way up your throat, taking up more and more space with each passing second until you can’t contain it any more. 

“So you were lying to me, right? About not being with her?” 

He meets your gaze, dark eyes all remorseful and gooey, then he nods, “Yeah. I was lying. To both of you.” 

Folding your legs up onto the dock, you look away in the hope that he won’t notice the tears starting to come. When he speaks, his voice comes out hoarse and quiet. 

“How much do you want me to tell you?” 

The question replaces the air in your lungs with a vibrating sensation. Another cluster of bubbles dissolve on the surface of the lake. You manage to croak, “I don’t know.” 

He doesn’t respond. You sense that he’s waiting for you to make the next move. 

Your mind wanders to the front porch swing that night you forced him to choose. He felt so far away. Until he told you differently, you were so certain he was in love with you. 

“I don’t know how to trust your words as truth, Frankie. All the way back to the start, I don’t know what was real and what was bullshit and I am fucking—” your voice cracks from the emotion burning up your throat. 

He goes to comfort you, but pulls back before making contact. 

Every cell inside you aches for him to bridge the gap. You follow the instinct, grabbing his shirt to curl into his shoulder. As soon as you do, he wraps his arms tight around you, bringing you in closer. 

A wave of moth-eaten hurt wells up your chest. 

“Why?” you sob, “Why did you do this to me? I don’t understand—”

He starts to rock you in a slow, soothing motion, burying his face in your hair as you cry into the collar of his shirt. In the background, behind your racing thoughts and shattered breaths, you hear him whisper on repeat: I’m sorry, baby… I’m so sorry.

[thecapricunt1616]

Chicory (c.b. one-shot)

Snippet (more BTC): He tugged you by your hand back to the bedroom, kissing you deeply tugging you close by your hips and his hands traveled down your back, over your ass, squeezing and you moaned a bit, cupping his jaw and rubbing your thumb gently over the stubble that had grown since he shaved in the shower yesterday morning. He hummed softly, carefully sitting on the mattress and leading you to straddle his hips, playing gently with the hem of your panties between his fingers. 

♡ Chapter Inspo: Chicory is perfect for love spells, & sex magick, it is also a natural aphrodisiac - this being because it is a great source of the androgen hormone androstenedione. ♡ Summary: You wake up to find Carmy's dirty little book he's been hiding from you, and convince him you want to try some things out from it, too. ♡ W/C: 3.5K+ ♡ Posted Date: 05/28/2024 ♡ A/N: Hellooooo!!! Happy day 3/7 of the Capri 200 Follower Celebration Extravaganza!!! You can find said extravaganza ♡ Here ♡ this celebration will be going until next Sunday (06/02/24)! We're getting todays party started early because I am physically incapable of sleep today I guess!! Lol anywhore - This O/S is based on ♡ This ♡ request, from my Darling Dirty Olive Martini otherwise known as the goddess herself @carmenberzattosgf ! Give her a follow NEOWW!!! I hope you love my dear Martini baby! Your other request is still in the works xoxoxo ♡ Warnings for BTC: Smutty smut smut, embarrassed Carmy, unprotected sex, AFAB!Fem!Reader, Reader not described pic's are purely for vibes only, swearing, and typical TB trigger warnings

♡ 𝐌𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ♡

➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 ♡ ➵ 𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 / 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘵 ♡ ➵ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 ♡

You and Carmy had been dating for about 2 months, and it was an extraordinary two months. While he wasn’t the best at communication, he tried, and he tried very hard. He was an amazing learner, and would pick up what you put down the second he realized he made a mistake - do his best to fix it, and not make the same mistake again. In regards to the bedroom, your pleasure came first, it was like that from the beginning. It wasn’t something either of you discussed, it was more that Carmy was the one who did the leading most the time, and you followed & told him what did and didn’t feel good. 

Most of the time, he was dead set on solely your pleasure. You could remember the amount of times you’d had penetrative sex with him, as much as you hated that you kept track, it was just in your nature to do so. He hadn’t let you go down on him yet,saying that he was ‘all good by eating you out’. On top of your lack of experience together - he also liked to have the lights off most of the time. You were much more sex forward than he was, so you just chalked it up to being shy, and didn’t think anything of it.

That was until he was sleeping one night next to you, falling asleep after eating you out for a straight 2 hours, you couldn't even remember the exact number of times he made you cum. You also weren’t sure how his jaw didn’t lock up. 

The reason you had woken up at such an hour, was because your hand brushed something hard and papery under his pillow when you stuck your hand under it in search of his to hold. You carefully pulled the foreign book out, and in the dim moonlight that peeked through his navy blue blackout curtains, you read ‘BDSM Kinktionary - The ultimate guide’ and oh - had that thing been read. The spine had been very broken in, it was clear this specific book of his was well loved. 

You flick through it, to see that there were multiple pages that had been dog-eared for later use. You got up quietly as to not disturb him, padding out to the kitchen where he kept the light under his microwave on. Leaning over the counter and flicking through the pages, finding the first one that had been dogeared and reading it. 

Bondage - The restraint of a person, either by physical item (cuffs, rope, etc.) or instruction (known as mental bondage). Restraint can be full-body (vacuum beds, suspension) or involve a single body part such as the eyes (blindfold), mouth (ball gag), wrists or even thumbs. Bondage may include furniture like sex swings and devices like handcuffs. 

It had various photos of different things mentioned and you raised your brows. “Carmy have you been holding out on me?” you whispered to yourself, a small smile on your face as you flicked to the next page that had been marked by a fold and read ;

Cockwarming / Soaking - Where one person puts their cock into their partner’s mouth, ass, or vagina (if they have one), and leaves it there for a set amount of time to, well, ‘keep warm’. Some people use it as a punishment, some people just like the feeling of it, some use it as a more intimate & sexual form of spooning/cuddling, and some use it as a method of trying to conceive after a creampie (see pg. 32).

You see a little star next to the definition made with red ink likely from a pen, and the word ‘creampie’ was underlined as well. Your mouth dropping slightly - this is likely what he wants to try. When you and Carmy did have sex, he would usually cum on your stomach, long thick white ropes of seed painting all the way up to your ribs, dragging his fingers through it before putting it to your lips to which you gratefully accepted and licked them clean. You tightened your thighs a bit at the thought. 

The bedroom door popped open quietly “Babe?” Carmy said, voice gravelly and deep with sleep. You jump in surprise, nearly hitting your head on the side of the microwave as you were bent over trying to read without your glasses in such dim light. “Wha’s up-” he asked padding over. He saw the cover on the counter behind you, eyes widening and eyes flicking back to you. His cheeks go pink “Uhh.. how- how did you - shit - fuck - m-m’sorry babe it was- I-” he ran a nervous hand through his hair taking a big nervous breath.

“Cockwarming?” you said and he rubbed over his mouth and chin nervously 

“It’s - i-it’s- y’don’t have t’do any a’that babe it was just a um-”

“A fantasy?” you cut him off. He bit his bottom lip roughly, swallowing thickly. His whole face and neck were red with embarrassment, he looked honestly like he could cry. Like a teen who’s porno-mags had been discovered. “I think it sounds…really hot” you grabbed the book off the counter. “I know you don’t really like getting head so-”

“S’not that I don’t like it. I just…I haven’t done it alot an’I don’t wanna embarrass myself n’stuff.” he rubbed his arm nervously and you stepped a bit closer, gently resting your hand on his chest right over his heart. You could feel it thumping against your palm like a monarch trapped in a plastic cup. 

“You can’t embarrass yourself with me Carmy, we talked about it. The way our bodies react to things- how fast they react, it’s not something we can choose. I’d never judge you, is that why you didn’t wanna tell me the stuff you want to try? Cause you thought I’d think it was embarrassing?” you asked him softly.

He looked at the floor, shutting his eyes and sighing “yes” he admitted quietly, “how much did you see?” he asked nervously

“Enough, I didn’t even know that was like a thing? But it sounds hot- can we try? I mean..we dont have to- but I could go right now, if you want to” you asked. He held his hand on yours, gently squeezing it. 

“I’ve never done it-”

“So we can learn together then, right? Things are most fun that way, anyways. I love doing new things with you, Carmy. It makes me feel close to you” you admitted. 

He pulled you into a hug, nuzzling his face in your neck and holding you close. “Thank you” he muttered into your skin, the tip of his nose chilly since you two had fallen asleep with the window open last night.

“F’what baby?” you asked, rubbing over his back, your finger pads gently brushing over the little moles adorning his skin like tiny constellations you traced over in early mornings just after his alarm went off and he was still rousing for the day.

“Bein’ you” he said and kissed the fleshy bit where your shoulder met your neck and a smile graced your lips, gently petting his hair “I wanna try if you wanna try…I mean really wanna try, not just ‘cause I wanna do it, cause you actually want to” he said. 

You pulled away, tilting his head to look at you “I want to.” you said, your voice honeyed with honesty and desire. 

He tugged you by your hand back to the bedroom, kissing you deeply tugging you close by your hips and his hands traveled down your back, over your ass, squeezing and you moaned a bit, cupping his jaw and rubbing your thumb gently over the stubble that had grown since he shaved in the shower yesterday morning. He hummed softly, carefully sitting on the mattress and leading you to straddle his hips, playing gently with the hem of your panties between his fingers. 

You opened your mouth for him, gently sucking on his tongue when he slipped it in your mouth since you know how much you both liked it and he moaned softly, gripping your ass tighter and pulling at the skin. You smirked into the kiss, pulling off after a few moments with a pop 

“Want y’to touch me” you said sweetly, gently kissing the corner of his slightly parted lips, his breath coming out in soft warm pants against your cheek. 

“Mm” he hummed softly reaching one of his hands under you, gently rubbing at your clit “y’sore?” he asked softly “I wasn’t too rough earlier was I?” he questioned as you kissed down his jaw, and over the hickeys, you’d left a few days ago on his neck. He wasn’t too stressed about them because he would just tell anyone at work to fuck off and there wasn’t going to be another friends and family night for a few weeks. 

“No love, m’okay, that was so nice earlier. Made me feel sooo good, Are you ok?” you gently stroke his jaw with your hand and he smiles a bit 

“Yes babe, m’fine. Feel good?” he asked and rubbed a bit firmer, in response your hips jerked a bit in his hands and a little breathy oh escaped your throat

“Yes jus’ like that babe feels so good, I love your pretty strong hands” you lovingly kiss his temple, resting your forehead on his “I fuckin’ love it when you touch me like that, bear” you said and his cock twitches in his boxers beneath you, already hard in briefs. It never took him much, but especially when you used his name. 

That name, his nickname. The name only the closest people in his life called him, the name that coming from you - made him feel confident, strong, dominant. “Can’t fuckin’ focus when y’bein so sweet baby c’mere” he pulls his lips to yours again, pushing your panties to the side, breaking the kiss of course to ask “thas’ok right?” carefully rubbing his fingers through your slick 

“Mmhmm, Course sweet boy - Feel how wet I am? All f’you baby. Y’so sexy, and so brave for telling me what you want from me, hmm? My brave Bear” you gently play with his curls, combing through them with your fingers. He kissed you again, cock grinding up against your pelvis unintentionally. You knew how much praise turned him on, he yearned for it. He carefully pulled back your hood, brushing the rough pad his middle finger over the sensitive bud. 

You whine into his mouth, hips jerking at the sudden, intense bolt of pleasure and in retaliation you took his bottom lip between your teeth and pull gently. Your eyes then fluttered open to see his hooded blue eyes darkened with need, long eyelashes fluttering his cheeks when he blinked. 

You sucked his lip between yours, sucking gently on it as he carefully trailed his hand down your slick folds, spreading your nether lips with his fingers a sticky click being heard when that same torturous middle finger that was teasing your innocent clit a few moments prior, breached your dripping entrance. Your mouth falls open, letting his lip snap back into place and a moan tumbles from your own lips. 

“Yes- fuck yes baby” you sat back a bit to take another knuckle in and he buried his finger to the palm, curling it and uncurling it around your gummy walls, a lewd wet schlick noise coming from your pussy as he did so 

“Sound so pretty” he breathed arching his finger a bit deeper and brushing against that lovely spongey little spot that made your clit pulse and fire grow in the pit of your belly. “Want another princess?” He asked, and unable to speak, you nodded, jaw dropped. You grind down onto his hand once he added his ring finger, rolling your hips so you were essentially riding his hand as he continued rolling his fingers and pressing on that spot. 

You were feeling that heat shooting to your core, your juices leaking down his palm, and wrist, droplets racing down his veiny forearm to nestle in the crook of his elbow. “Oh- oh-fffffuuuck” you whined out, rolling your hips quicker as you chased your high. “Mm so sweet - y’so sweet Carmy- letting me use your hand like this, thank you” you give him a hot, wet kiss, lingering for a moment. 

“Lemme help you mm?” He pushed your back to lay over him fully, cheek pressed to his chest “I like takin’ care’a’my girl” he said and quickly matched your pace with his fingers, continuing to curl them into that spot with every thrust in to his palm. He groaned softly at the short high pitched little whimpers you made as you went slack over his chest, your hips twitching as your walls fluttered wildly around his fingers, sucking them back in each time he pulled out. 

“Feels so good- sososo good” you rambled, nearly drooling on his chest you were so far away in your orgasm. 

“Y’always do so good princess, always so good, can y’give me one more? Ye’? Then you can fall asleep on m’cock mm? You’d like that I bet, you always whine when I pull outta you” he said hotly in your ear, voice thick with lust and pure need. This was the game you two played, he would fuck you absolutely dumb, so that he got comfortable enough to talk dirty thinking you wouldn’t remember what he said or that you were too caught up in your own nearly atomic orgasms he was determined to lure out of you to be able to hear him properly. 

“Need it- need it- want you-“ you choke on your words, hips arching into his touch as he continued his assault on your gspot, this time adding his forefinger. “There- there right fuckin there I’m- I’m gonna make a mess shit fuck-“ you sob out, thighs nearly shaking with pleasure. “Carmy Carmy- Carmy- oh!” His name fell from your lips like an invocation. 

“Thas it pretty girl. Fuck- so fuckin hot- make a fuckin mess all over me angel.” He massaged that spot with his fingers, the heel of his palm giving delicious friction to your clit that was causing your brain and your mouth to disconnect, the string of lewd swears and filthy moans going unheard by you as you were pretty sure your vision went white behind your shut lids and your legs went fully numb for a moment. 

You came back a few minutes later to him whispering praise into your hairline, littering little kisses over it and gently brushing your wet sweaty hair from your forehead. “So so good baby. Always so good f’me huh? Y’gonna let me take care’a’you now?” 

You picked your cheek up from his chest, your skin sticking to his and pulling away like scotch tape, slow since you weren’t in a rush to move being so exhausted and very comfortable where you were. “Hey you, gonna lemme clean you up so we can try this thing out?” He carefully brushed your baby hairs from your face that were wild and curly with sweat from the encounter. 

In response you hum softly, in agreement, throat feeling dry as you sat up to let him move. He carefully reached over you, opening his night drawer and grabbing the feminine wipes he kept in there for you, as well as grabbing your water bottle from the tabletop.

He holds the straw to your lips “big sip f’me, ye’?” He cradled the back of your head gently. You leaned in, taking the sip he requested, and as soon as the icy water he assured your cup stayed filled with passed your lips one sip turned in to a few big gulps, eyes shutting in bliss. “Goood girl.” He praised gently. Hearing the bubbles at the bottom a few moments later, meaning you’d hit ice and it was empty so you pulled away, your tongue darting out to lick your dry lips

“Thanks” you said softly and pecked his shoulder with your chilly ice water lips gently. 

“You go do what you gotta do, I’m gonna fill this up mm?” He kissed your head and got up, heading to the kitchen. You went to the restroom, making sure to wash your hands which you know he did as well since you heard the kitchen sink while you were sitting on the toilet rubbing your tired face. 

By the time you got back, he was already switching out the fitted sheet for a clean dry one, in clean boxers - his problem still evident, standing tall and tugging at the fitted fabric. “Carm” you said softly and he looked up at you 

“Hey baby- y‘waters there got you a granola bar if you want it too. Wasn’t sure if y’just wanted to go to sleep but i'd love if you had a bite or two- 

” he goes on. The only time you had a hard time getting him to stop talking was when he felt as if you needed taking care of, turning into the male version of his sister, as you’d quickly found out how she treated him the few times you’d met her. 

“Carmy” you said again, stopping his rambling. “What about the book- the cockwarming thing? Did you…you don’t wanna do that with me anymore?” You slipped out of your now wet panties and flicked them into the laundry basket. 

“Oh- oh-“ he watched them fly and land on your shared pile of dirty clothes from the week of you sleeping over. “Uh- no- I-I mean yes yes I wanna do it with you, I can um…let me get a condom just in case I like- accidentally-“ you stopped him once more

“If you came inside me on accident I think that would be really hot.” 

He stopped digging through the drawer and looked over at you, cheeks flush. “Did you…take your thing?” He asked, like it was a secret. You laughed a bit at his boyish awkwardness regarding woman’s products. 

“I don’t take a thing the thing meaning my implant is in my arm. I’m never at risk with it for pregnancy, well - shouldn’t be - but it’s like a 98% thing…I also am pretty irregular? So I dunno” you shrugged a bit “but irregular means I probably won’t be pregnant, especially on birth control, so.” You explained. 

“Okay- um- yeah. Yeah.” He said, pulsepoint visible in his neck from how hard his heart was pumping in anticipation for what was to come next. “So- alright. You- you wanna be on top? I- I don’t wanna like..crush you” he said and you nod excitedly 

“I love sleeping on you! I’m gonna fall asleep, is that ok?” You asked as he slipped his boxers off, cock kissing his naval in greeting as it springs up from its previous restraints. The tip was so pretty and cherry pink, glistening with precum at the tip. Every time you saw it like this you just wanted to fall to your knees and take as much of the beautiful thick length down your throat as you could - but that was a line to still not be crossed by you two. 

“Ye’ s’fine baby. As long as y’re ok w’me wakin’ up hard as fuck I’m probably gonna dream about fuckin you feelin you like that all night” he admits, laying in the middle since you were sleeping together and getting comfortable for you. You crawled on the bed and took his shirt that you’d been wearing fully off so you could be chest to chest, and drape over him like earlier. 

This time, he spread you out with his hands, one on each cheek and guided your hips so his tip was nestled snugly against your entrance. “I’m okay as long as you’re okay” you said truthfully and sunk back on his throbbing cock. He grunted a bit, biting his lip and shutting his eyes for a moment. You knew he did that now when he didn’t want to cum too quickly, just from being with him a few times, you picked up on stuff like that just like he did. 

“Y’so fuckin tight” he breathed once he was able to relax again, wrapping his strong arms around your back and you thought he was going to push you down, seat you fully on his cock - but, no he…he’s hugging you. He’s continuing to let you sink down as slow as you want. When you finally were seated to the hilt, he places a chaste kiss to your jaw. “Thank you.” He nuzzled his nose into your neck, lashes kissing and tickling your cheek as his eyes flutter shut. 

“Thank you Bear. Always treat me so nice” you continued gently playing with his curls as his hands gently rubbed over your upper back, tracing the curvature of your shoulders with his fingers. 

“Oh I’d say it’s the other way around princess, you always make sure I get what I want - y’too good” 

To that, you just smiled, falling asleep a tiny smirk on your face - knowing it was the other way around, you knew he’d never agree. 

But you both wouldn’t have it any other way.

[bearw-me]

I loved you Drinking buddy with Husk work, can we get one for Alastor since it was revealed that he also was a drinker in episode 5.

Thank you

𝐃𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐁𝐮𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐰/ 𝐀𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫!

𐐒 includes : gender neutral reader 𐐒 cw : drinking/alcohol, fluffs, drunk rambling 𐐒 summary : platonic once again! nor would i be offended if you see a glimpse of romance lol 𐐒 note : trying to stick as close to canon alastor as i may possibly get (did yall know alastor is a whiskey drinker too?)

"a classy drunk"

likes to drink in lowkey settings, and not often in front of other people (think tea party but in this scenario the teacups have whiskey)

Alastor doesn't drink often but likes his hard liquor. . . i.e he is a whiskey man

if you can make Alastor laugh and feel just as light as the whiskey does. . . your definitely his one and only drinking buddy

Doesn't like sweet drinks at all

in fact i'd be willing to bet that he loves the way whiskey burns his palate and throat

he'd never talk down about what you prefer though, however strong or tasty you 'promise' it is

"Well, to each their own!"

Alastor would never usually let you pay to have a good time with him--like you literally never pay for your drinks unless you absolutely insisted

On that note, although he'd order Husk to get you drinks. . . he'd rather not involve the grumpy cat into his delightful night and do it himself!

Alastor never drinks until blackout. the most you'd see from him is a hellish buzz and a reddish burn to his already red face

Although you are Alastor's designated drinking buddy, he does consider you a friend outside of these circumstances

Loves to listen to his old vinyl's and record player while the two of you chat through the night (he's not a day drinker either)

"Good music and better conversations"

(Always goes on an on about how the sound of the record player and the voices that spin from the needle have soul and wonderful grit to it, compared to whatever you were going to play on that damned phone of yours. . . toss it before he does)

he likes to hum, not really noticing he is until you make it obvious by staring. maybe after he'd try to cover it up by asking you to dance with him

(while dancing) he'd like the spinning, so hopefully the two of you will be able to stay upright for a few more minutes to keep the fun up

I feel like you'd never see Alastor make a fool of himself, even with a few drinks in him, but

he'd love how hilarious you are "my drunkard friend!" he'd rather spend hours with you laughing then talking all serious (what's the point of drinking then?)

if you ever got blackout drunk (or far too gone) Alastor gets upset

he wanted to talk more and now your all limp and groaning from nausea

does take the utmost care of you though, you'll always wake up somewhere safe, either in your room or in Alastor's w/ plenty of medicine and water

[beom9yus]

ours. - sookai x reader

:sookai x afab!reader

:threesome, size kink maybe, all of them are virgins lol, loss of virginity, possessive!sookai if you squint.., creampie, oral/sookai receiving, reader is perverted and horny always

word count: 10k…

Winter break was here and almost all of the group had gone home with their families. Except you. And soobin and kai. It was a coincidence, really, soobin’s parents had a winter vacation planned so soobin had to stay here. Kai was free to go and decided to stay with soobin because he didn't want him to spend the break alone. You stayed because you frequently see your family anyways, staying for break was normal for you.

 You walk through the snow begrudgingly, it was really hard to do around this time and apparently there was going to be a blizzard so bad that it would make the snow get really tall. You don't believe it. 

As you finally set foot in the building hallway you look at the time and realize because of the snow it took you 30 minutes to get to this building rather than the usual 15. Okay, maybe there is a blizzard coming..but if it was coming you wanted to spend it with your close friends rather than alone. You finally enter the hall and take out the spare key the boys gave you after getting so close with them since summer started. You unlock the door and enter the shared apartment, realizing that neither of the two boys were home. I hope they're okay.. 

As you grab your phone from your parka pocket you realize that soobin texted you about 10 minutes ago that he and kai went out to get snacks for the game night. 

You: Okay :) be safe, both of you. it's really rough outside…

cute bunny bestie🐰: don't worry our little y/nie, we’ll be home in about an hour, kai says not to die of lack of penguin cuteness while he’s out 🐧

cute bunny bestie🐰: btw we left the heater on, keep it on so that when we get there it’s still warm hehe

You giggle as you text back. 

I think I'm starting to blackout…help! And yeah ok i'll leave it on.

You put your phone away to finally take off your shoes and parka. What are you going to do for an hour? You decide to head to soobin and kai’s room to play some games on either of their PCs. As you enter you laugh at the fact that they took out kai’s bed to add in his pc setup because it wouldn't fit with the bed in the room. and the fact that because of that they sleep together now, although their beds were huge so you understand why they decided on that. You did ‘eeny meeny miny moe’ with your finger to choose which pc to use. Your finger landed on soobin’s, so you went ahead and turned it on. Both of them let you use their computers on a regular basis. although for some reason they won't let you go anywhere else but the game you're going to play, and weirdly enough, the search engine, which is actually the reason you’d thought they wouldn't let you use it. They're weird. As you look through the apps to see what game you feel like playing, a messaging application that everyone has these days both on their phones and computers pops up. You choose to ignore it and make it smaller to the taskbar. As you continue looking, you realize there's an orange flashing from the app on the taskbar and as you click it to exit out, you quickly glance over the messages, not wanting to invade soobin’s privacy, but just wanted a sneak peak. You only made it to the first message because that's when you see your name. And it's from kai…curiosity got the best of you and you read the preview, not daring to open it, because this was invading enough as is.

kaimalhue: you really think y/n would be up for it?

You check the time, it was from yesterday, around the time you were also here hanging out with both of them..what were they texting each other while you were here? Up for what? Game night?? You had already agreed to this a long time ago…weird. You decide to brush it off and exit out before they come back and see you snooping through the app. You decide on a game and play it for a while until you're bored and shut down his pc. You get up and stretch and decide you're going to shower. Even though the heater was on, you wanted to be even more warm, and you're too scared to move the settings on it. So what better way of getting warmer than taking a hot shower? You have clothes put away in yeonjun’s room from the sleepovers they would always invite you to, although they're mostly night shorts and tank tops, you're sure you'll be alright though, since the heater will keep being on. 

As you finish up your shower, you get out of the restroom and you see that soobin and kai had gotten home. You don't miss the way they stare at you for a little too long. “Hey guys?” you say as you wave your hand in front of your face. They quickly look away and cough. It’s weird, this has been happening more often, and even though you do the same to them, when you see either soobin or kai looking too good, and you can’t help but to stare, you're sure they're being this way for a completely different reason. Right..?

You get on your tippy toes while against the high ass counter built for giants like them. As you ruffle through the shopping bags to see what they bought, you see candles. You miss the way kai smiles looking at your figure extending, and the way soobin’s mouth opens a bit, looking at your legs stretching as you struggle to look over the bags.

“You guys bought candles? What for?” soobin answers you first, “well they said that there’s a high chance of a blizzard coming in so-” kai interjects, “mm yeah right, if there's a chance of a blizzard and it happens, the power might go out so it’s better to be safe.” you nod at their reasoning. “Hey, don't you think it's weird how we haven't heard of the blizzard on any kind of news, or like, social media?” you ask. 

They both look at each other as they realize you're right. You frown, “wait, did you guys just think of buying candles since you heard of it coming or-?” Kai looks at you confused and says, “no, beomgyu told us to stock up on candles…” You look back at him and start spilling, “wait, the only person i've heard talk about the blizzard, and getting info about it, is you guys and beom…gyu…” your face turns into a shocked one once you realize what’s happened. 

sookai look at each other as they realize they've been fooled. You start giggling and then laughing hard. “So….when you said ‘they said’ you…were…talking… about beomgyu!” you clutch your stomach as you realize they had just bought more than a dozen candles for nothing. “Damn it beomgyu!” soobin curses as he touches his forehead with his large hand and places it in a fist on the table. Just about you were to laugh at kai’s face staring into nothing, annoyed that beomgyu tricked them into buying useless candles, you hear a harsh gust of wind hit the living room window. You quickly turn around and realize there's a lot more snow than there was before, you start to see it almost reaches about 11 inches on the outside doors. Maybe beomgyu was right…

Two hours later and there's a blizzard. Fucking beomgyu. You guys turned on the tv and everyone is saying it came out of nowhere. They're starting to give warnings of power outages. You just hope it doesn't hit you guys. 

Four hours later and it's starting to get dark. You were sitting on the couch watching a movie while kai sat asleep on the other one. while watching the heroin about to get attacked, suddenly, the power is out. 

You hear soobin yell a quick no from his shared room with kai, he was probably in a game. You giggle a little at imagining soobin being pissed. You then turn to look at kai who fell asleep midway through the movie on the other couch. He was so cute.

You quickly forgot about the power that literally just went out, and you started to look at everything about him. His pretty face, large hands…and your eyes started to focus on his lips and nose. His lips were so cute and plump and his nose was so so so pretty, you start to wonder what it’d be like with his face between your legs with his nose hitting your clit as he greedily ate you out..as your thoughts raced, you felt your breathing getting more shallow as your chest moved quickly from your light breaths. It’s not like he even did anything to you to get this hot and bothered, you’re just that perverted, getting horny just from looking at him.

Soobin came out of the room and asked if you were okay. nervous, you sit up straight with your hands on your knees and ask him why he asked. You suddenly feel really small seeing him look down at you, looking so…big. You unconsciously rubbed your thighs together. “Well..the power did just go out…” he tells you. 

You realize that's what he was talking about. Of course it is. Duh. “Y-yeah i'm fine i-” you turn to see kai getting up slowly, rubbing his eyes. “The movie’s done? ‘M sorry i fell asleep,” he says still a little sleepy. You tell him that the movie didn’t end because the power went out. He got up quickly and looked around, “wait, the power’s out everywhere?” you take out your phone to see if you still had service. Nope. 

You look up at him, “yeah kai, it seems it's out everywhere.” Soobin sighed, “it's only 7, what are we going to do for the rest of the time, we usually don't sleep until, like, 2 am.” you nod, knowing that your fucked up sleep schedules are now going to haunt you. 

“Hey, let's start putting out the candles, yeah?” you ask them. They let out little hums of approval as they get the candles out and start carefully setting them up around the rooms. Well that only took 15 minutes of your time. 

You guys sit down, kai on your left while soobin sat on your right. kai still making a little space between you as he always did and you wish he’d just get close to you. But you’re also too shy to do the same. You realize how cold it is now without the heater, and you start shaking a bit. Soobin looks at you and asks if you want one of his sweaters. You look at him and say “yes, please” with big round doe eyes. 

soobin’s breath hitched at the sight of you looking at him almost in a begging way, the way your eyes shine from the candles and the pink fluttering of blush on your nose and cheeks because of the cold. He finally realizes how long he's been staring at you as he feels kai pinch him where his arm extended onto soobin. 

He clears his throat and tells you he’ll be right back. You tell him thanks, and do the first most brave thing ever in your life. You snuggle yourself onto kai, chasing his warmth. Kai stills, nervous that if he moves you’ll see the effect you have on him. “Kai,” you say. “Yes?” “When soobin gets here, wanna play a game?” you giggle. He smiles, he would do anything you asked him to, especially if it included giving anything to you. “Yeah,” he says. You guys stare at each other for a moment before you almost move to kiss him, hearing soobin’s footsteps enter the room, you realize what you were about to do. It’s not like you actually moved to kiss him yet, but just the way you had that thought had you blushing deep. 

You look at soobin as he says, “I tried to find the smallest one I have, it fits me kind of small, so you should be good to go” you grab the white sweater as you put it on. Too big still…the arms of the sweater go past your hands and the length stops almost at your knees. yeah, maybe you should’ve just stolen something from taehyun or beomgyu. “Thanks soobin,” is all you can say as you smile, because you feel really cute cause of how it fits you. 

“Y-yeah..no problem..” Suddenly you feel like the atmosphere has changed. Why’s it suddenly awkward? Both of them avoid looking at you, and you look down, thinking, maybe a game will bring this back to normal? You did tell kai you wanted to play one. “Guys, let's play truth or dare, since we can’t play any actual games.” Kai laughs his usual laugh, “I haven’t played truth or dare since middle school!” You smile at him, “well get ready to play it once again at your big 21 years of age.” Both of the boys laugh at that. 

“Okay guys sit on the ground! It’s better than the couch.” Soobin frowns, “How’s it better than the couch when the couch is more comfortable?” You roll your eyes. “Dumb bunny, we can’t face each other in a circle on the couch” you say as you cross your arms and shake your head. Soobin tries to not let the nickname affect him, but he can feel the twitch in his pants. 

“She’s got a point soobin..”

“Whatever.”

As the three of you guys get in a circle you start playing the game. It starts out lighthearted as you dare soobin to eat a piece of wax from the candles and ask kai to be truthful about which plushie is actually his favorite, as he confesses it’s his big fat molang plushie, one that you bought him. Soobin dares you to enter taehyun’s room and move something because he knows he hates when people are in his room. Scared, you go and come back. Hopefully taehyun doesn’t notice…the game goes on and you guys dare and ask dumb shit until soobin states, “I’m bored, these are too simple, can we dare and ask for a little more…i don’t know, like, heavy things?” You and kai look at eachother and just nod in agreement. “Okay,” you say. “Kai, you go first.”

“Um…y/n, h-have you ever made out with someone?” he looks away with a blush as if it was the dirtiest thing he’d ever asked. You can’t help but giggle loudly and he looks a little embarrassed, “yeah kai, I have, I’m not some prude you know.” He just nods in embarrassment. It’s soobin’s turn as he thinks of what to dare or ask. “Hm…kai! I dare you to kiss y/n on the cheek.” You shyly smile and look at him, “it’s okay kai, you don’t have to.” “Yes he does! It’s truth or dare not truth or maybe do the dare!” Soobin exclaims with a pout on his lips.

 “It’s okay, I’ll do it,” your breath stills as he reaches over and gives you a peck on the cheek, quickly going back to his place and looking to the side, hand covering his cheeks. So cute. You hadn’t realized you said this out loud as kai gets more red and soobin smirks. To turn the attention away from him, kai, still looking away, tells you it’s your turn with a soft voice. You nod as you glare at soobin. “Soobin!” You point at him, “I’ll give you such an embarrassing truth that when you hear it, and realize you have to answer it, you’ll want to die.��� He just chuckles as he tells you to go on, thinking you’ll ask something lame like kai did. 

“When was your first time?”

He chokes. His mouth goes dry as he looks around the room and shuffles in his place, okay maybe you were going to embarrass him to the point where he’ll want to die. “Well…” he looks up and see both you and kai staring straight into his soul. “I haven’t…actually…done..it…” he whispers. Both he and Kai miss the way your legs move a bit, and you feel yourself clench around nothing, starting to feel turned on. Soobin’s actually a virgin? You try to act normal, like the thought of taking each other's virginity wasn’t in your mind.

He looks up and sees you nodding saying “mm okay,” trying to act as normal as possible. But when he sees kai trying to stifle a laugh, that ticks soobin off. “Kai you have no room to laugh when you’re a virgin too!” Kai looks surprised and quickly looks at you for a point of a second before looking away, looking shocked and opening his mouth, being tomato red now. Before he can retort something back in his defense, soobin says, “well it’s my turn now. Kai. When was the first time you masturbated?” He smirked. He knew this information, he just wanted to see kai get even more embarrassed than he was currently. 

You look over at kai, waiting for him to answer. “I…this...summer…” Soobin places his hand behind one of this ears. “What? You gotta speak up kai we can’t hear you.” Kai keeps his eyes on the ground as he says louder, “I masturbated for the first time this summer!” All of you are quiet. Fuck fuck fuck fuck. Why’s this making you so hot and bothered? For some reason it makes you want them even more, you want to learn everything with them.

You chew on your bottom lip as soobin tells you it’s your turn. You don’t want to embarrass kai even further though, so you ask soobin a question again. You realize at this point it’s not truth or dare, it’s just you guys asking embarrassing questions to each other. You should be given a Medal of Honor as you do the second bravest thing ever, you ask, “Soobin, you probably jerk off too, what do you think of?” Soobin just swallows hard as he feels his dick start to rise, of course, he thinks about you. But he can’t say that. Right? “Uh.., ah, this one girl, she’s really cute.” Your heart drops. Of course, you don’t even know why you asked, as if he was going to say your name. You try to seem unfazed as you smile, “you gotta show me her one day.” “Yeah.” It’s kai’s turn to ask. 

“y/n, are you also a virgin?” you blush wildly as you slowly start shaking your head and looking at the floor, almost mirroring kai’s earlier movements. “m, I am..” you don’t dare look up. The blood that was once in soobin and kai’s cheeks went straight to their dicks. Kai started imaging you on the bed, his dick in his hand as he was getting ready to enter you. He quickly snapped out of it as he saw soobin get up. Soobin gives Kai a knowing look and smirk before composing himself and talking.

“my ass is getting tired, and so am I,” he looks over at the clock. 9:30 pm. “i think i'm heading to bed, even though it’s not 2 am. I'm pretty sleepy now.” You look at him “actually me too, I think im going to sleep in yeonjun’s room, goodnight guys.” 

“im going to shower…” kai says. You stare wide eyed at him “what?? kai there’s no power, which means there’s no gas, so you’re going to take a really really really cold shower. What if you get sick?” A really cold shower is what kai needed right now, he feels hot from want and he doesn't know how long he can last like this. “It’s okay, I can handle it.” You worryly look up at him, “okay…” As you each get up, you don’t miss the way soobin signals kai to follow him with his head. you see kai just nod subtly before going after him. Okay…

You enter yeonjun’s room and you take off your bra as you look at his body mirror, seeing how small you look in soobin’s huge sweater. you decide to be a creep and smell it. it smells like both of them, they probably share it. Smells so good. ‘M such a fucking weirdo, you think. You give yourself one last look and smile as you head back to the bed to try to sleep. after thirty minutes you realize you can’t. Your body is too used to the 2 am sleep time. 

As you exit his room you hear Kai quickly open the bathroom door at the end of the hall and he walks quickly so you bump into him. He just got out of the shower with his hair still wet and a tight white shirt on and pajama pants. He’s shaking. “kai! you’re shaking so much! I know you just wanted to get clean but you’ll probably get sick now..” you pout at him. You put your hands on his cheeks unconsciously and he leans into it, closing and fluttering his eyes. He can’t resist your stare as he lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. As he finally opens his eyes he says, “I know…y/n..can…can you stay with us in our bed..?” 

You look at him confused. He starts rambling “wellit’sjustthatit’sreallycoldandit’llbewarmerifwesticktogetheryouknow.”

 You giggle at his fast words. “Ok, but only if soobin is okay with it.” “He is.” You stare back at him, “He is?” He realizes what he said and tells you that of course he would be because you’re their best friend. You unconvincingly nod your head. hm. As you both enter their shared room, you realize soobin isn’t asleep yet either. He’s sitting on his headboard playing some game on his old ass gameboy or something. “Soobinnieeeee” you say as you go over to him. “Is it okay if I sleep with you guys? It’ll be like the sleepover our friend group always has, but just us three, hehe.”

 He looks up from his game and flashes you a beautiful smile, and his dimples come out. “Yeah, it’ll be way more warm with you. Kai and I usually sleep with a spot in the middle of the bed anyways.” You hum as you turn to look over at Kai sitting on his gaming chair, watching the conversation between you and soobin. You give him a goofy smile and a thumbs up as you make your way over to him. He cackles at your gestures. You’re way too cute for him to handle.

 “Kai, your hair is still really wet, let me dry it off for you.” You grab his towel from his shoulders and start drying as much of his hair as you can with it. Kai tries to subtly inhale your scent as he feels your warmth behind you, and, as well as your boobs being squished on his back. He plays with his fingers and nails trying to keep his composure. “I think it’s way more dry now,” you chuckle. “Oh!” He looks at your face wondering what has surprised you. “Kai, you’re really handsome with your hair all messy,” you say. He smiles and says thanks and looks away, by the time he wants to face you again you’re on the bed next to soobin, now your boobs against his arm, and he notices the way soobin glances over at them and gulps down. 

You sit in between both soobin and kai in bed as you watch them play on their consoles. You tell them goodnight, finally starting to feel sleepy thanks to how warm they are, and you lay down facing soobins waist. Soobin and kai give each other a nod and turn off their games. Soobin gets up and blows out some candles illuminating the room, leaving just a couple, enough so you guys don’t trip and fall at night. As soobin comes into bed again, he hears you ask kai if you could cuddle him, and he shyly nods his head while saying a quiet “yeah.” You put your arm around his waist and your head on his chest. “So warmmmm” you say to him. Kai just hopes you don’t open your eyes towards his bulge or move your hand closer to it. 

Soobin turns to you and asks if he could cuddle you. You turn your head to him with your doe eyes looking sleepy and half open and tell him yes. He puts his head on top of yours. You feel his broad shoulders and big hands encase you and feel his thigh on your ass. You were nervous. You wondered if kai and soobin could hear your heartbeat as you were pressed against the both of them. It takes some time before you calm down. Before you fall asleep completely, you hear soobin ask, hot breath against your ear, “our little y/n-ie, can you help us with something?” 

You quickly snap open your eyes and look up at kai, he just nervously looks down at you while biting his bottom lip, looking a little desperate. You shift and let go of him and look up at the ceiling, breathless. “With what..?” You ask. “Kai and I were wondering,” he paused, “if you could let us fuck you.” Your breath hitched noticeably. You squeezed your thighs, already feeling wetness between your legs. “Wh-what…?” You say, still breathless. 

It’s kai’s turn to speak, “p…pl…please y/n, really, really wan’ you…” he shifts closer to you and starts to drag his nose along your neck. 

“We wanted our first time to be special, of course we weren’t planning on losing our virginities in a threesome, or even together, but, it’s you we want y/n.” Soobin says, exasperated. “Only you.” He starts to play with your hair with his nimble fingers as you feel him start grinding on your hip. You always dreamt of this, but you didn’t expect for it to become a reality. You nod your head. 

“N-Need a verbal agreement my little y/n,” Soobin says as he slowly grinds against you still, eyes closed and brows furrowed in concentration. 

“Y..yes…” as soon as you said those words, you felt kai start attacking your neck and soobin’s lips against yours. The kiss was hot and messy, his lips were so soft as you brushed your tongue against his bottom one, moaning into his mouth while playing with kai’s hair the best you could. As you guys separated from the kiss, you saw the way a string of saliva followed from in between you. It was kai’s turn. Compared to soobin, he was way more gentle, and nervous, you completely turned to him and you let your hand go under his shirt, onto his stomach and his back while your other hand was on his cheek. He unsurely put his hands on your waist and you coo at how cute he is, and all he can do is whimper in response. You travel your hand up in his chest and let your thumb caress his nipple, “nghh, y/n, feels so..good.” You’ve barely done anything to him at all and he’s already a mess. You guess you are too. You feel soobin start to groan in your ear as he keeps grinding into your ass now. You let out a choked moan as you feel his dick pressing against you. Feels so big.

“y/n, ngh, want you so bad, please.” 

You nod and your lips let go of kai’s as he whines from the separation. Soobin just smirks as he instructs him to get in the middle and lifts you up in a doggy position in front of kai’s bulge. You start to whimper, seeing how big it looked even behind his pajama bottoms, wanting him to fill you up so bad. Kai looks down at you, his face looking so fucked out just from making out with you, and you feel yourself clench against nothing, feeling the way your arousal goes past the point of wetting your panties and is now getting your shorts wet. “Take off everything but the sweater.” Soobin tells you. “And leave it unzipped.”

You do as you’re told, slowly and shyly remove your tank top along with your shorts and panties. Putting the sweater back on, feeling even smaller in it now. You feel the way soobin and kai stare at you, hungry stares making you feel like a lamb caught in between two wolves. You feel too exposed. You squeeze your legs together and use the sweater to cover your boobs while zipping up the garment. You feel the bed shift and soobin appears behind you, towering over you. “No my cute y/n, show kai and I what we’ve been wanting since we saw you.” Soobin was shaking, as well as his voice, and was nervous as fuck, but he hoped you didn’t notice while he took charge of what was happening.

One of his hands separates your thighs and another unzips the zipper. He pulls down the sweater to your elbows, not enough to fall off of you but not enough to cover your body anymore. You feel the coldness of the room hit your nipples as they harden even more. Your body was on full display for both of them. Kai slowly thrusts his hips up, as if he was going to reach your cunt floating over him, groaning and biting his lips with sleepy eyes and eyebrows furrowed. You wish you could take pictures of his form. 

Soobin slowly bent you over to a doggy position again, lowering your head closer to kai’s bulge. You groan, “kai…want your dick, kai please, wanna taste it.” You swear kai was gonna cum right then and there. “Please- please, please, wanted you for so long now y/n…since I saw you.” You start to pull his bottoms down along with his boxers. His dick springs free and hits his stomach. Holy fuck, you think. He was so thick and big, such a pretty color and veiny. your mouth started watering at the sight of his head dripping precum, glob after glob going down under his head towards his shaft. 

“kai….” as you start to reach for it, soobin grabs your wrist with his hand, “wait, y/n, I think kai wants to tell you something.” Kai looks up at soobin and shakes his head no, no he doesn’t. Soobin gives him a firm look. After staring at soobin, Kai finally looks at you and starts speaking lightly, “y..y/n…t..the first…time I masturbated, it was right after we came home from dropping you off..thought bin was in the shower, an-and I couldn’t stop thinking about you…didn’t know what else to do but to touch myself for the first time…t-then..he came in and heard me whispering your name touching myself thinking of you…” all you could do was look up at him in awe.

 “kai…” soobin smirks, “although I appreciate your honesty, you know that’s not what I wanted you to tell her. tell her your perverted secret, come on. Or I won’t let her suck or fuck you.” Kai cried no as he turned red and his dick twitched, he liked this. “Y/n won’t forgive me soobin! Please..!” Soobin swung your wrists behind your back. “Tell her, or you can leave.” Is soobin really a virgin..? you thought. He seems way too good at this. Kai covers his eyes with the back of his hand as he starts talking, “y/n..the plushie you gifted me…smells so much like you..” You smile because you had sprayed it what seemed like a billion times with your signature scent so he would think of you whenever he had it with him. He continued, “so I….mmphgh..I…whenever I think of you I place it under me and grind on it..wanted..it to be you so bad..thought about stuffing my dick into your cunt every time..couldn’t help myself..m sorry..it’s all ruined now.” You felt your cunt start leaking and your arousal starting to travel down your thigh. 

As soobin lets go of your wrists, happy with kai’s confession, you grab his thighs and licked the precum from the bottom of his dick to his tip. Kai moans out so high pitched as he finally looks at you through his lashes. you tell him he’ll have to tell you what he likes since you’ve never done this before. He's never had a blowjob before, but he knows that whatever you do it’ll make him cum. 

you start to do kitten licks on his tip, feeling how heavy and smooth his dick was against your tongue. You loved it. “kai,” you say, his hot head still on your tongue, “lo- your cock, -eels o good…” he couldn’t handle the way you were saying this with your big doe eyes looking up at him with his tip on your tongue, it took everything in him not to spray on your face. You took his huge hands and placed them on your hair, “wan u to use me.” He groaned at your request and slowly pushed your head down on his length. He moaned out when he felt you gag on him, dick already hitting the back of your throat and not even all of it in. 

He started pushing your head up and down more, feeling you gag on his dick and looking up at him with big wet eyes, shining so much. As you looked for soobin, you realized he was on his gaming chair, watching you guys, he had his eye half way closed and a slightly opened mouth as he slowly palmed himself. 

Suddenly, you felt your nose hit kai’s pelvis bone and felt his dick go the furthest it’s been in your throat. You try to calm down and breath heavily through your nose as you gag around him. You look up at him again and moan. Seeing and feeling you was kai’s breaking point. “Y-y…y/n!…gunna..m…gunna..” you felt him shake a little as his mouth opened, moaning. His chest heaving up and down quickly as his eyes rolled back and started saying your name like a mantra. You felt his cum hit your throat and he pushed your head down wanting to feel you as he came. “M..shor..m..sorry..y/n…feel..s..suh…good…mmphghhh..y/n..y/n..y/n…y/n!” With one last spurt he let go of your head and started breathing heavily, blond bangs sticking to his forehead, chest deeply going up and down. You swallowed everything as you felt him bring your head close to his to kiss you. 

This time, the kiss was lazy and soft, you felt yourself grinding your bare cunt on his stomach, seeing it start to shine with slick. You were so aroused you could come right then and there. Kai liked the feeling as he looked up at you, “thank you…was so good.” You smiled back, “like it a lot, wanna do it more to you..like making you feel good..” kai felt his dick twitch, he wanted to bury himself in your cunt, but he’ll have to take a minute to calm down. 

That’s when you felt soobin get behind you again, pushing you up so you’re on your knees but with your back flushed against his chest, your back straight up. He takes off the sweater and starts caressing your boobs, and you swear one of his hands could fit both of your breasts in it, everything about him was giant. breathing in your scent on your neck, you moaned as he rolled your nipples between his thumbs. Kai still laying down, watching you guys in front of him.

“Can you be my first time y/n..?” This time he sounded shy and unsure. You nodded yes as he started giving your neck hickies, going over the ones kai had done before. 

“Want you so bad soobin.” 

He lays you down on kai. Kai starts grabbing at your breasts and plays with your nipples as soobin kisses you and starts opening your folds, touching your cunt. He slides his finger from your slit up towards your clit. You moan at how good it feels and how good his pressure is on it. He then brings his finger down to your slit, the pad of his finger entering your heat. He pumps in and out of you slowly, and you feel everything. You clench around his finger. “Need to ready you up..”

You look up at him moaning softly, “soobin are you actually a virgin..? Mm making me feel so good already..” you feel kai giggle behind you, still playing with your boobs. you see soobin blush at your question and compliment. Embarrassed, but not stopping his actions he says “I…I did my research.” you giggle and kiss him.

 “you’re good at studying then.” 

He smiles as he adds another finger into you. You put your hands on top of kai’s as you moan at the feeling. “Soobin, want you now…” you’ve been waiting for so long now. “Don’t think ur ready y/n..” frustrated, you pull him closer to you as you basically make out with his neck. “Soob…” you feel tears fall from your eyes, “soobin please, please, please my bunny, need and wan you so bad.” Soobin looks at kai,  unsure. Kai gives him a nod, which in return soobin exhales shakily. “Okay. But tell me if you want me to stop at any time, this is your first time too. Don’ wanna ruin it.”

 You quickly nodded as you bit your lip. He took off his sweater and his sweats as you saw his dick spring up. Holy fuck, just like kai’s, big, tall, and pretty. You feel a heartbeat in your cunt as you spread open your thighs, you clench around nothing as his dick twitches on its own. He crawls over to you, nervously looking back and forth into your eyes, “thank you..” He starts with his fat head on your clit, rubbing it up and down for a little, until he finally stops and travels down to your slit. You feel how hot and hard his dick is. He slowly starts to push himself in, and your eyes start releasing tears from the pain, he was so big. “Y/n we can stop,” he tells you. You shake your head no. “Soobin go…don’t care…want you in me..” as he slowly nods, he finally pushes the tip of his dick in. It takes everything in him not to rut straight into you like a dog. You feel so hot and gooey and just good. He groans and moans and whines in your ear feeling so fucking good, and you tell him to go in deeper. 

He hides his face in your neck as he lets his dick go into you more. He then places his forehead against yours, eyes staring into yours. “So good..feels so good y/n, you were made for us.” You lifted your hips up as you moaned. 

To be honest, you liked the pain, it felt good to you. You felt your eyes close and your mouth open while you felt him split you open. 10 minutes later, and he was almost entirely in you. With one final thrust, the most he could fit in you was in. He stilled while you got used to him. You felt kai shuffle behind you, feeling his dick hit the curve of your back and he groaned with every move you made. “Soobin, move, please, feels good now.” He slowly got up, sticky forehead leaving hours as he started to grab your hips and thrusted mercilessly into you, he didn’t really have a rhythm or a set pace but it didn’t matter. “Y/n, love everything about you, when….ah..when you asked who I thought about when I jerked o..off..the answer was you…think of you always…since I met you.” You moaned at his confession. 

His dick was so big you felt him everywhere you needed to. Kai’s hand had reached down to your clit, rubbing circles and different figures. It all made you feel so fucked out. Soobin thrusted especially slow and hard one time and you felt yourself come undone. 

“Mmmmmm…kaibin..kai…soobin..kai..soob..” as you felt kai’s fingers still against your clit, you felt your eyes roll back and your body shake as your hands reached out for anything, landing on kai’s arms. Soobin was still thrusting into you as you came, feeling your gooey walls clench so hard against him that he almost couldn’t move. “So glad we’re gunna be your first, only ours. Love you being my first.” As you came down from your high, you were like a rag doll. You felt kai leave your clit alone and felt his hands go back to giving your nipples attention. Your body limp, you just moaned and let soobin use you. His cute bunny mouth opened and eyebrows furrowed in concentration. That was until one of kai’s hand started rubbing on your clit again, wanting to see you cum again, while the other one pressed against the bulge imprint on your lower belly of soobin’s dick in your cunt. You whined and moaned, “kai…can’t…can’t…” kai smiled as he whined pathetically  in your ears “please..please…wanna see you come again…” you were too weak to fight back. 

soobin was barely holding on, he had to stop himself from coming three times already, not wanting this to end. He wanted to feel this good forever. Feeling that he was about to come, he asked where you wanted his load. You just groaned and wrapped your arms around his neck as he thrusted into you even more sloppily than before, “want your seed in me my bunny.” With that sentence, soobin moaned and whined and rolled his eyes back so hard that he thought they’d go around. As he thrusted into you, coming, he kept repeating, “I love you y/n, love you y/n, I love you y/n since I met you, wanted you to be mine, love you so much.” This had you whining like crazy. Once he was done and filled you up to the brim with his cum, soobin took out his dick, hissing at the over stimulation. He pushed the cum that was drooling out of your cunt back into it, as he went up to you again, he kissed you, “felt so good…” 

Kai whined as he felt his dick wet from all his precum, he wanted to bury himself in you, too. You felt his hard dick against your back and told soobin to lay down where kai was. Soobin’s mind was still hazy and brain melted, did it immediately as he looked down at you. You loved their dicks, you know after this nothing but them would be able to satisfy you, ever. 

You put yourself in the same position you were in when you were sucking off kai, this time kai behind you and soobin under you. You mewled out, “kaiiiiiiiii wan ur dick please…wanna feel so full and good again…give it to me..wanna be your first..” kai whimpered as he entered you, being able to do it so much easier thanks to soobin stretching you out. As soon as he bottomed out, he became like a wild animal. Crouching down so he could whine and moan in your ear, feeling his breaths against your face. 

“Waited for this for so long…you feel so fucking good..feels like I’m gonna come already…nghhh..only we can make you feel this way okay?..no one else. You belong to us only. Mine…mine..mine….mine. Ours.” You felt drool leave your mouth as you cried out from how good those words and his thrusts were hitting you, eyes rolling back, feeling like you were about to melt. You open your eyes and look up at soobin, seeing his dick hard again already. You take him whole in your mouth and moan against him as you feel him hiss and pull at your hair. Just like kai, you let him use you however he wanted. Kai was more sloppy than soobin, but fuck, did he hit everywhere he needed to. You felt yourself come as he started pressing on his own dick imprint on your stomach this time, “you’re so small, can see our dicks in you..such a tight little cunt..so fucking good and nice and wet for us…”

Soobin felt you moan, and thrusted up, hitting your throat and sending his cum down. He closed his eyes as he let his orgasm take over as he groaned and shook, “ah fuckkkk.” You felt some of his cum slide out from the side of your mouth as your body went limp and you laid on his thigh. You could feel kai’s dick twitch in you as he held you up, fucking you like you were just some doll. “Kai…” you whine, “all those times you rutted against that plushie, wish it was me, love your dick, feel so good my mind is going numb. love, love hyuka’s dick so much…” 

hearing a new nickname for him, from you, sent him over the edge as he started crying into your neck as he filled you up too, “nguhhh y/n…also..also luh…fuck..ilove you so much…wish I was yours forever, wanna fill you up every day now, never wanna stop.” He messily kissed your neck as he rode his high, slow thrusts going into you.

as he slid out of your cunt, he did the same as soobin, scooped up his cum and pushed it back into you with his finger. “Want this to stay.” he crashed next to you and soobin.

“I love you guys,” you say. It felt good to confess. Both soobin and kai responded at the same time, “we love you more.” You giggled at how in sync they were.

With the very last of your strength you say, “Forgot there was a blizzard happening. It’s not even cold in this room anymore. Made it so warm.” You went in between the middle of them, laying down, closing your eyes.

Kai giggled as both of them turned to you and embraced you. “Well now we know what we’re going to do to not be bored,” soobin said. You felt kai smile as he nodded, “yeah. right.”

Before completely passing out you whispered a, “thanks beomgyu weather wizard for this blizzard.”

And somewhere miles away, beomgyu sneezed.

[ghostedeabha]

simon ‘ghost’ riley x reader

wc: 894

warnings: chronic illness, mentions of acid reflux and nausea, mentions and descriptions of chronic pain. it's implied that reader is autistic and adhd but never explicitly mentioned. migraines. other than that, pure fluff.

a/n: this is absolutely a personal lil comfort fic i wrote bc i'm chronically ill and disabled lol. hope y'all enjoy. i tried to keep it broad and not mention specific illnesses so anyone with a chronic disability can read, but my experience with chronic illnesses and disabilities are based solely on my own and thus may accidently exclude certain illnesses.

it was more often than not that simon came home to the flat like this, and it never failed to break his heart a little bit every time. dirty dishes untoched in the sink, clothes strewn about. just generally messy and dirty.

it’s not as if simon had left the flat alone during his deployment, quite the opposite in fact. and anyone who knew that fact and saw the state of the flat would probably tell simon that his girlfriend was clearly lazy and didn't care for his things.

simon, however, knew that was far from the truth. he stepped over the dirty clothes and past the sink of dirty dishes, he’d deal with all that later, and made his way to the bedroom where he knew he’d find his love. find her in the exact spot he had left her no doubt.

his suspicions only confirmed when he opened the door slowly, giving it a gentle knock first as to alert her of his arrival. as he stepped into the room, placing his bag down by the door as he closed it behind him, he looked over to his girlfriend, curled up in a pile of blankets in the dark room. simon took note that the lights were completely shut off and the blackout curtains pulled over the window.

“hey bunny…” simon says quietly as he approaches the bed with careful steps, his deep, gruff voice barely a whisper. “got a migraine?”

his girlfriend’s response came in the form of just slightly moving blankets and a small face poking out from a tiny hole in the pile of warmth and plush. her pretty face etched with that permenant pout she had when she was having flare ups.

she needn’t respond to his question for him to know her answer.

“take your migraine medicine?” simon asks gently again, no condescending intentions, he knew the answer was one of two things. ‘yes and it barely helped’ or ‘no, i have none left’

when his girlfriend shakes her head no, he instantly knows that the latter option is her current situation, and his heart breaks further. it was too late to take those meds now, even if he ran to the pharmacy just up the road and got her refill. they were preventative meds, not relief.

“would you like to go to the hospital?” simon questions further, he holds up both hands and his girlfriend pokes the right.

‘no.’

“okay, then… how about i go and get you some chips and a soda? maybe that combo will help, want to try that luvie?” he suggests, his hands held up again.

this time she pokes the left.

‘yes.’

“perfect.” simon responds, kissing her blanketed forehead. “i’ll be back in 10 with a large chips and a large dr. pepper. want anything else? have you eaten at all today?”

yet again his lovely girlfriend shakes her head no and her hand pokes out to point towards her lanyard on the nightstand.

“your cards?” simon asks, despite this he’s already grabbing the shark lanyard and handing it to his baby.

she takes it with a weak, forced smile. only on her lips to show her love and gratitude for his help before the mask slips and her pained pout returns to her face. no big deal, simon understands it’s not a reflection on her feelings to him.

uncapping the marker she writes on the blank, laminated card on her lanyard, part of a set of communication cards.

'didn't eat. too much nausea and acid reflux.’

“oh, okay. then just the chips and soda.” simon confirms with a firm nod. “i’ll be back in 10, doll.”

and as promised, he’s back in 10 minutes flat. ice, cold dr. peper and some hot, salty chips in his possession. a small smile on his face at the sight of slight progress in his lover’s state, instead of a pitch black room she sat in a mostly dim room with the tv quietly playing an episode of Bob’s Burgers.

“here y’are. made sure to get them nice and hot. want some ketchup?” simon says with a gentle tone, a stark contrast to the man he had to be just 12 hours prior.

when she nods, simon is quick to go to the kitchen, coming back with the bottle of ketchup for his beloved. he sits on the bed next to the blanket monster that his girlfriend currently was and handed the bottle of ketchup to her, holding out a little cup for her to squirt however much she wanted into.

even moments like these simon treasured. many would see his girlfriend as a burden, why? well he wasn't really sure. but simon didn't. he felt a sense of purpose being able to help her when she needs it, plus, what was better than coming home from deployment and snuggling with his princess? even if his princess was more of a blanket moutain than anything right now.

the two adjusted to make them both comfortable and cozy, blankets surrounding them both as simon held his darling close, large hands gently rubbing up and down her sides in a soothing manner, happy to relax with her and watch tv.

simon would take this here, over the battlefield anyday.

[toons-and-doom]

If twisteds could talk, their voices could be distorted/gurgled as the ichor could literally be also choking them. If not then I guess they just make animalistic noises lol. Or.. they could be repeating they know right before they got.. twisted.

besides Vee, her voice could be glitchy as fuck or making random glitchy noises, she’s a robot anyways.

Astro, possibly would tell a toon he just fucking tore apart “sweet dreams” once they died, hoping that their in peace now, but carrying more guilt.

Dandy is the only one who has full control of himself, but his voice could still be either the same, or slightly distorted as well..

Dandy you couldn’t have fucked up that bad all by yourself bro..

(Holy shit while I was writing this, imagine that the Eternal Happiness skins have their own twisted variants, you know they’re close when you hear distorted laughing. And you should probably run when you see a rainbow puddle.)

Oh god now I’m becoming a professional yapper..💔💔

It’s okay I’m a yapper too

Oh god I’m thinking about potential voice lines

So for poppy it’s mostly gurgling / zombie esque noises. Occasionally she mumbles something about how the ichor hurts, or how she has to complete the machines.

Boxten gets a bit more voice lines, occasionally he’ll quietly call out stuff like ‘ guys ‘ or ‘where did you go? ‘. There’s of course some gurgling- maybe even he sings a little- to the tune of a disoriented music box, in an attempt to calm himself.

Now Shrimpo makes more animalistic noises, more so growling and a bit of gurgling. Occasionally he utters something like ‘ I HATE the dark ‘ or ‘ I HATE the cold ‘ or maybe even ‘ I hate THESE STUPID TOONS MAKING SO MUCH NOISE ‘

I don’t imagine Tisha speaking much, maybe she hums softly or remarks on how dirty this place is.

Toodles straight up makes animal and gurgling noises. Maybe she will have a throwaway like for when it’s a blackout that she doesn’t like the dark.

Brightney is pretty similar to poppy in that she makes more so gurgly zombie esque noises. Occasionally she may reference the other toons and her need to find them because the dark can be dangerous. Maybe she’ll reference specific toons and remark toodles is afraid of the dark or that Rodger has been more jumpy lately so the dark won’t do him good.

I’d imagine razzle and dazzle humming as well when they’re idle, since they can’t really move. Both when disturbed I think they speak at the same time, saying contradictory things like ‘ DIE ‘ and ‘ RUN ‘

Tbh I can’t imagine Rodger talking. If he did he’s oddly snappy, like ‘ DONT TOUCH THAT. ‘ or like ‘ YOU CANT HANDLE IT ‘

Teagan is also a zombie noise person, maybe she remarks about the tapes and how she needs them. She needs them or dandy is going to kill them all. . .

Goob just sobs. Hes scared, he’ll call out to the toons and says he doesn’t want to be alone. He wants a hug- he call if anyone wants a hug in a weak voice. And most devastatingly, if there is a scraps in the party, he’ll call out to her.

Meanwhile scraps is more manic, laughing manically while chasing toons, maybe even taunting them. If she’s looking, perhaps she has a moment of clarity and calls for goob in a more concerned voice (she has additional voice lines about how she’s worried about him if there is a goob in the party)

Flutter doesn’t say anything < / 3

I’d imagine dandy is a lot more pissed off so his voice lines sound like he’s gonna snap on yo ass. Obligatory where are my tapes line.

FOR REAL ASTRO DOES TELL HIS VICTIMS SWEET DREAMS BUT THERES A DEFEATED SIGN AFTERWARDS

SHELLY SHOUTS TO GET PEOPLES ATTENTION BECAUSE SHES CONSTANTLY IGNORED

AND VEE DOES GLITCH

~~~~

Oh god prescribed joy and ichor would be a match made in hell but it’s very silly!! :D!!!

[jerktournament]

FINAL ROUND - GLaDOS (Portal) VS Herbert P Bear (Club Penguin)

!!! PROPAGANDA BELOW !!!

GLaDOS: "So mot only is she running your character through a series of puzzles with the intention of killing her at the end, but in the second game she spends the Entire. Time. Verbally and emotionally abusing you, including body shaming and bullying you for being an orphan. If it's any consolation, she does have to exist as a potato for the second and third acts of Portal 2."

"Known for being mean (hot). Mercilessly targets the player character's every possible insecurity. Petty and mean. I understand if you don't want to include her since she tends to dominate polls, lol."

HERBERT: "This mf spends his whole life trying to heat up a frozen island and terrorizing the innocent penguins that live on it all bc he was bad at sailing one time and is too much of a wimp to try again. Classic Misery loves Company type asshole."

"operation blackout would have been NOTHING without him (mostly because he caused it). he has a SOLAR LASER. this polar bear is an ass who literally harnessed the power of the sun and froze the top members of the elite penguin force (a group of penguin special agents) and his best friend is an equally villainous crab"

"Herbert may be a fandom darling in our fandom of like, 20 people. BUT DON'T LET THAT FOOL YOU! He is a conniving, EVIL bear, and a professional jerk and some highlights of his jerkishness include...

- Spending ten years of his life (by the time the game closed) trying to destroy the Penguin Secret Agency and Elite Penguin Force (both were agencies that protected the island from disasters and villains like Herbert) with varying success...

- SUCCESSFULLY destroyed the Penguin Secret Agency with a popcorn bomb, which destroyed their HQ. It should also be noted that while doing so, he locked in the player, Rookie, and Gary the Gadget Guy, presumably so the bombs explosion would have killed them all.

-Teamed up with the EPF to stop the Ultimate Protobot 10,000 and the Test Bots, a small group of four dangerous robots after he personally brought them back. When Protobot went "too far" for Herbert's standards by threatening the environment and trying to completely destroy the EPF (despite the aforementioned Popcorn Bomb incident literally destroying the PSA, and also a certain Operation: Blackout), causing him to temporarily switch sides. This might sound like a character growth moment...except for the fact that he immediately betrays them once Protobot is dealt with and attacks and damages the EPF's HQ using a robot hydra made for the Medieval Party that he stole.

- A canonical ex-dictator. Don't believe me? Look up Operation: Blackout on the Club Penguin Wiki! He froze several agents during his reign of terror, was open to freezing innocent civilians, and also wanted to do away with puffles- the pets of penguins. He also banned several hobbies and professions during his reign (being a Ninja, a DJ, a Pirate, etc) for no reason other than disliking them. He also destroyed the EPF'S HQ and exposed two agents' private information to the public. This means Herbert is the first and only character to canonically dox people he doesn't like on Club Penguin.

-Was planning to bomb the EPF literally two months later with a hot sauce bomb (makes sense in context of the game and yes, it is more destructive than it sounds).

-Brainwashed puffles into digging coins for him purely because his henchman, Klutzy the crab brought a coin slot to use for his DIY heater, instead of just removing the coin slot and retooling it to work without one like a normal person."

[mangochii]

The Crow and The Butterfly 🦋

(Holm Kranom x Half-foot!reader)

Fine then, I'll make one myself 🥹 Sorry for any grammar mistakes and misspellings in advance, I'm writing this during a flood and blackout. Might as well write while our 1st floor is flooded LOL.

Also some art too in the end.

I stared intently at his hands, the way it moved and swayed as he spoke. Marillier floated blissfully, seeming to enjoy her time being fed with mana, the sweet undine dripped little droplets on the ground as she ate.

"Spirit care is quite simple, really..."

His voice tickled my ear, he had always been a bit soft-spoken. Every syllable that fell out of his mouth I consume with much fervor, I nod every now and then. The small tug at the corners of his lips did not go unnoticed by me, his face always lights up ever so slightly as he talks about spirits.

"Though, gnomes like me usually have an easier time to gain a spirit's trust. Being more attuned to nature, of course."

"I see..." I mumbled, as if I could even befriend a spirit like Marillier, I'm not attuned to anything but probably myself. My eyes met with his, and I can't help but get lost in it. It's like he carved his initials onto every gemstone in existence, and made it his eyes. It glints as he opened his mouth, a beautiful melody filled my ears with every word he spoke.

I am a crow, and intrigued I was with a sparkling treasure, his eyes, a pretty shiny.

"Pretty..."

"Hm? What was that?"

I closed my eyes, hopefully not noticing my expressions. "Pretty interesting, I said. Can you tell me more?" I want to hear more of you, more of your voice.

I am a crow.

"Of course."

And I am smart enough to know that you're out of my reach. The shimmering gem fell into a hole, too deep for my beak to reach.

Why he keeps on indulging me is beyond me, but I fell into the same trap every time. Hoping he'd feel the same.

"Teach me more, Prof." My lips tugged upwards, my eyes closed. "I'd like to know more of the things you love."

I saw him smile softly, a smile softer than the moonlight in the winter. "You never fail to amuse me." With a chuckle he turned to fully face me, Marillier by his side.

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything." I breathed, voice barely heard. I saw his eyes widened slightly, I hear his heartbeat racing, his breathing hitched, and muscles tensed.

"Okay." He whispered back, pink lightly dusted the apples of his cheeks and to the tips of his ears.

For once, I felt like that shiny gemstone is within reach. It's so wrong, so selfish of me. But I can't help it.

Holm stared at the fire, he felt the eyes of his party members bore through him. "So Holm, you never really opened up about your love life to us." Daya hummed, her finger pointed at him.

"Well, I don't think Holm's the type to have a partner, y'know?" Mouth filled with meat, Mickbell shrugged, with Kuro nodding in agreement. "I've crashed by his place few times already, it's maidenless."

"No..." Kabru, the ever so perceptive man, spoke. His hand covered his mouth as he began to mutter. "I've seen him talk with a half-foot lady everytime we go back up from the dungeon, she looks like an adventurer too... Maybe a newbie? No, she looks a bit experienced... Hmm..."

Holm's breath hitched, he dare not to look away from the fire. A futile attempt to delay the inevitable, in the back of his weary mind, he thinks that it's already a bit too late.

"A half-foot lady with Holm? Oh!" Mickbell eyes lightened in recognition, "I know her, she bought me and Kuro free food when she accidentally spilled grape punch on me."

"Meat yummy."

"You're so right, Kuro! Gods, I wish I can eat there again... Anyway, I heard that she's with that dwarf, Namari, for a bit... I didn't think she'd be into gnomes though, most half-foot ladies nowadays prefer to be with dwarves, because they look muscular than us half-foot men."

"They're right, you look like a noodle." Rin added, eyeing Mickbell's form up and down, with Daya giggling in tow.

"Oi!"

"A good noodle in our eyes, Mick." Kabru sneaked in.

"That doesn't make it any better!"

Holm flinched as Mickbell stood and pointed at him, "This is about Holm's love life! Not my physique!" He huffed and sat back down, arms crossed. His brows were furrowed together so hard that it might leave a crease in-between.

"There wasn't anything really... She was just curious about Marillier and gnomish magic." Lies. The way she tries to listen intently to his explaination was adorable, her smile every time she met his eyes filled his heart with such a comforting warmth, the way she asks questions to clarify some of his points, the way she bites her lip when he talks a bit too fast, everything.

She was Holm's everything, but they're just... Nothing. There's nothing between them at all, despite the two of them knowing they both want to be something, anything but what they both currently have. There was nothing.

A series of groans came from the rest of the party, disappointed. But Holm couldn't help but sweat at the way Kabru looked at him, sapphire eyes stare at him knowingly. He swallowed hard and looked away.

To love her was selfish, and cruel for himself. She could've fallen for any other half-foot, but chose him. What happens to him once you pass? Look for another? Or spend every waking moment of his life grieving til' he too, passes away? Surely she had thought the same, settling for ghostly touches and lingering smiles.

He knows and feels her hesitance, how her fingers twitched when she tried reaching out. But they both feel too far from each other.

No, she knows this is unfair to him. Unfair to the both of them.

But gods, why does she look at him so fondly like that? Why? Her eyes shine brighter than any jewel in the world every time he spoke. Why?

"I love you, Holm." With a sad smile, my voice hushed and sung a broken melody, I finally spoke my heart out. I've mulled it over day and night, and I've concluded that my happiness is worth less than his.

"But I can't. I can't have you. It's too cruel for you."

His eyes widened, mouth opening and closing. Words failed to get past his throat, so he stood there, frozen. As he'd always do.

"I'll spare you the decades worth of pain. The years worth of you grieving my inevitable death." I said as softly as I could, reaching for his cheek. "Thank you... For indulging me." I rubbed tender circles on his skin, before pressing my lips on his own, his lips were dry and a bit chapped, he tasted like sweet fruit. For mere seconds, that's how long the kiss lasted, but I was for sure thought it lasted for minutes.

I am a greedy, greedy crow. And you are a butterfly.

As I pulled away, his hands crept up to the back of my neck. Slowly, delicately pulling me back closer to him. "No." He breathed, shakily. I hear his heart hammer on his chest, his eyes glimmer amidst the tears that began to pool.

"I want to love you, I want to hold you more like this. I want... I want to love you in every library, by the fountain when we first met, on the sidewalk, at that one restaurant that you said you liked, at the storage room that I found you stuck in,

Under the, the tree by the hill,

In the dungeon,

Everywhere.

Let me love you."

Little butterfly placed delicate kisses on my beak, your wings were more beautiful than any shiny that a crow like me could ever find.

His kisses was chaste, delicate, and thorough. Tenderly engraving his name in my soul. "I don't care if I have a decade or two or whatever years left to be with you."

His fingers guided themselves to my waist, he held me so desperately, as if I'd disappear had he let go of his tight hold. "I'll cherish those years like a family heirloom."

In his eyes, I'm neither crow nor butterfly. But a little flower, your crystalline jewels stare at my petals, as I guard the spinning nectar that you can't help but consume.

I guess you're no better than me. You drink and drink, an endless parchment of my love.

My body relaxed as he kissed me once more, the sweet honey of my soul pours fresh unto his heart and tongue. His heartbeat is my beautiful orchestra, and his eyes is the forest that I don't mind getting lost in.

"I love you." He whispered to my ear like a silent prayer.

I couldn't help but smile, red flooding my face. "I love you too." Your voice is the sweetest symphony.

___

YAY ART 🥰