#I was convinced to be mentally Ill

[autuboho]

never heard word in my life, I’m probably research it later

i hate you "pair the spares"/"everyone must be paired" tropes, i hate you forced last minute romances, i hate you implication that a happy ending means a romantic partner, i hate you amatonormativity

[melxhunter]

I feel like there are a lot of people out there who needs to hear this:

If you dropped out of school because of diagnosed (or undiagnosed) ADHD, Autism, ADD, OCD, Dyslexia, Anxiety, Depression, Bipolar disorder, psychotic disorders, schizophrenia etc… You did not fail. The education system failed you.

[starry-bi-sky]

on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.

Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.

Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.

Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.

There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.

[lotus-pear]

dazai stop rizzing up the enemy challenge go!!

[gatekeeper-of-witchcraft]

correct me if I’m out of line bc I’m not a detransitioner, but I hate hate hate how common arguments against transition/“in defense of” detransitioners is “they can’t have kids!” or “they can’t breastfeed!”

why should mitigating harm always come down to what a woman can do for a potential child (or a man’s ability to father children)? why isn’t it enough to keep HER from harm? it’s just prioritizing women as broodmares all over again. why isn’t it enough to keep HER from chronic pain, heart and blood pressure issues, incontinence, necrosis, limited mobility and death?

[the-knife-consumer]

Bill is the villain of the series. Not Mabel. Not ford. BILL. oh my god. If I see one more post pinning literally everything on Ford I'm going to lose my mind. And before it was Ford it was Mabel. Mabel was a little girl terrified of growing up who got tricked by BILL pretending to be someone else. She didn't make a deal with him she got tricked (and even if she did?? Literal twelve year old she's just a kid). Also yeah ford did a bunch of horrible shit because BILL fucked with his head. Bill MADE him trust no one and isolate himself. Mabel and ford are not the bad guys the BAD GUY IS THE BAD GUY. SCREAMS AND RUNS AROUND IN CIRCLES. COME ONNNNNMN

[dagwmeno]

ummmmmm some killer x dust would be awesom..

Ding ding food is served!! Eat up!!

[coconut-mamaa]

[wolfythewitch]

please talk about cheek kissing and yearning please I wanna hear about it

OKAY SO

I live and die by cheek kissing okay it's about the yearning

Now. I'm not going to Admit that the post was about Judas this is purely hypothetical But as someone who's had an entire conversation about betrayal and unrequited love, it's about damning the two of us, it's about sending you to your death and inevitably, me to mine. My last touch will not be on your lips, not while I use my own to bloody your name. It will be on your cheek, where tears will pass over when they fall, and where blood will stream from your crown of thorns, where sunlight withdrew her touch as the veil tears in two

I am your betrayer and your lover both

[decaf-mother]

My toxic trait is I think fictional characters can fix me.

[noiseemaster]

bro thinks hes rattlesnake jake ! ( antagonist starlo take )

hes been on twitter for a while but i figured i can put him on here too now i guess . i forgot to design the feisty fourbut theyd have fun designs too . im not all that into uty anymore but maybe ill try and design somefin for them later !

doodl es . i guess . smiles !

[lord-shitbox]

Bite/Bark loredump post !!!!

hit the unfortunate 25k word milestone in the slideshow I have for their lore so to celebrate. I will post an assortment of things from it. to start, here is the playlist I keep for them.

mentions of sex/drinking/drugs etc in here. also LONG POST WATCH OUT! anyway @sbuns69 & @vistrology wished to be notified when I posted this! hi guys :D

OKAY EXPOSITION OVER. SCENE IDEAS AND RANDOM BULLSHIT GO!!!!!!

(some context for the last one above: vampire spit has chemicals in it that numb pain & also Feel Good, so getting bitten is pretty enjoyable, though the extent to which it's effective varies — depends on the physical compatibility between both parties. it's also been noted that blood often tastes extra good if the compatibility is high)

[shouts-into-the-void]

No, actually, my pet peeve is when I am consistently very upfront and transparent about the fact that I'm not this super sweet angel of a person and I have Severe Mental Health Issues and instead of listening people decide that they somehow know better, only to turn around and get pissed off at me when I turn out not to be a super sweet angel of a person and show symptoms of severe mental health issues—

[lotus-pear]

what is childe doing in bungou gay dogs😟

[ciderjacks]

ocd is weird bc I definitely still have it, I just got really good at identifying it and shutting it down. Like I was taking down a gross medical sticker on my wall that for some reason I stuck up there last year, and my brain was like “no don’t do it. You’ll die if you do that” so I put it back on and my brain was like “or…maybe life will get way better if you take if off. And if you leave it life will get worse. Want to make that choice” and I was like really stumped over it, then suddenly I was like ohhhhh ocd you tricky devil… and tore the sticker off. I go thru this exact experience about thrice a week.

[hatsunevitu]

okay so since the Cupid Ye was aired i’ve been constantly thinking about cartman’s mental condition. we know he’s probably taking medication now, so i hc him having antisocial personality disorder and bipolar disorder. and i’ve been imagining him having his depression episode for the first time after he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. he’s not used to it, he has no idea what’s going on and why he suddenly feels so tired and numb all the time, so he just stays at home skipping school and avoiding social contacts. he’s scared and the “it’s all because of your illness, poopsikins!” from his mother doesn’t help at all.

and sooo i wrote a short moment about this?? i’m sorry for any mistakes because it was originally written in my native language, not in english :(

***

Ever since early childhood it was clear and obvious to everyone that Eric Cartman had problems. Not even like that, Kyle corrected himself in his thoughts. Eric Cartman had Problems. Sociopathy, sadism, aggression – all that a person could notice in Cartman after only half an hour of communication.

And Kyle wasn't too surprised when bipolar disorder was added to all of the above in a sloppy psychiatrist’s handwriting.

By the time Cartman was finally diagnosed he had already gone through several phases of mania. Kyle even did a little research on the disorder. "To know what to prepare for the next time I meet this psycho," he told Stan. "And to know how to help him if necessary," he added silently to himself.

By the age of fifteen, Stan's company was already used to Cartman's regular explosive mood swings, which were accompanied by crazy ideas, aggressive behavior, and, if absolutely unlucky, deaths of a couple or more people.

It was typical: after a short break, Cartman would burst into Kyle's room (often through the window), start showering him with business plans, startup ideas, and opportunities to have extreme fun. Kyle was silent, trying his best to ignore him and frowning irritably when Cartman smiled ecstatically and rushed to Kyle, tugging at his sleeve and almost shouting that everything would be better this time and that it’s a one hundred percent successful scheme.

For some time Broflovski genuinely believed that everyone in their friends group was going through such tortures, but after a short questioning, he found out that they had not seen Eric's mania with their own eyes. Kyle understood — and they won’t, when Cartman just chuckled at the outraged "What the fuck, Fatass?" and replied, "I guess you're just special, Kahl. They wouldn't understand." His eyes flashed especially maliciously, and Kyle looked away hastily so as not to give Cartman the opportunity to start another fight.

Well, all in all, no one's world collapsed when Cartman was diagnosed with a new mental illness. Over the past months of insane hallucinations and obsessive intrusive thoughts, he managed to make everyone sick of him. He refused to go to the therapy sessions for a long time, shouting, running away and trying to get into a fight, and Liane was too afraid to find out another unpleasant truth about her son, preferring to go with the flow and shut him up with the fulfillment of every single of his whims. Kyle doubts that anyone would have done anything to help Cartman if he hadn't intervened. Why – it was unclear to Broflovski himself, but Cartman's first depressive phase hit them both unexpectedly too hard.

Disappearing from everyone’s sight for two weeks, Cartman ignored calls and messages (although Kyle had a serious doubt that anyone other than Butters and Broflovski himself texted him) and skipped school despite Mr. Harrison's threats of expulsion.

Liane avoided answering questions, pursing her lips in frustration and talking her way out with a trivial "He's sick." Kyle didn't believe a damn second, knowing that if Cartman was sick, Kyle would have known about it the very first. Something was wrong. For some reason, the desire to find out what exactly was much stronger than it should have been when it came to Eric Cartman.

***

Perhaps Kyle really shouldn't have worried so much — not to the point of climbing into Eric's window at night. But the Cartmans hadn't opened the front door all day, and by that time Kyle's nerves were so stretched that they threatened to break if he didn't get answers to his questions in the next few minutes. Disturbing thoughts and images of possible turn of events appeared in his head. Perhaps Cartman was dead? Or, on the contrary, has killed someone and had been dissolving dismembered body of his victim for two weeks? One option was no better than the other, but nothing was even close to what he saw in Eric's bedroom.

Haggard, seven kilograms thinner, with an unhealthy skin color and bags under his eyes, he looked painfully wrong, not Cartman-like. He didn’t look exactly ill — more like lifelessly tired. But that wasn't even what hit Kyle so hard.

He did not suspect how much had been hidden in Cartman's eyes before – lively fire, hatred, anger, enthusiasm, passion – all this was gone, dissolved, buried under this empty, dead, unblinking gaze. For a second Kyle even thought (hoped?) that he was really dead, but the heaving chest under the blanket and almost inaudible sound of breathing exposed life in Cartman. He was lying on his back, his head slowly turned towards the window. Kyle sought recognition on his face, but did not see a single shade of any emotions.

He froze in the window, making eye contact with Eric, feeling like he saw something he shouldn't have. He tried to revive the old familiar hatred that usually boiled in him as soon as their eyes met, but Cartman’s emptiness totally killed all the anger. Kyle climbed through the window – Cartman didn't react in any way, lazily closing his eyes – and walked up to the bed, touching his shoulder timidly.

“Hey, Cartman?” he said, shuddering at the way his voice echoed throughout the bedroom. Cartman didn’t open his eyes but smiled hardly visibly.

“Hey, jew”. His voice was empty and emotionless and Kyle pursed his lips with a bit of a pain.

“You need to see a doctor, Cartman”, he said firmly as Eric finally opened one eye disinterestedly. “I’ll help you. I promise”.

And he did.