#I was actually a little hesitant if I should post this tbh
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dreamii-krybaby · 1 year ago
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I hate the fact that I have to make a post regarding the situation that is happening on MDTumblr rn. But it has gotten the point its been affecting people that have nothing to do with it, even me a little, which I did not expect.
I have no intention of involving myself or in picking sides, but I feel like by already making this post am already putting my feet in the water. But anyways, am going to get straight to the point
If you have no personal relationships with the people who are involved, don’t involve yourself, don’t pay attention to it, that’s it, ignore it. Don’t discuss it, don’t opinion on it, nada, cero. And if you do want to discuss it, do it privately with people of trust.
And if you are confused on what’s going on? Thats fine, in fact, don’t even pay attention to it, don’t ask, keep doing your own thing. It’s not worth your time and energy.
As of rn I feel like there is still a lot of lack of information regarding context and details. And I feel the best way to approach this is to be neutral. As if worse case scenario, if either side of the conflict turns out to be wrong, you save yourself from embarrassment.
Its sucks that I need to talk about this bc am seeing a lot of people that don’t have to do with anything get involved or become affected by it. Even myself.
What am about to do this hypocritical of my part, since I advised to not make an opinion, but I have to say this:
Am disappointed at how some of the people that are heavily involved isn’t really handling the situation well. As in handling things in a more in civil way you could say.
Yes am aware some of them are minors but that doesn’t mean some of them can’t do better.
And am also disappointed that some who aren’t minors are also not handling the situation that well.
I’ve seen both parties insult at eachother, Like if that’s going to make anything better.
So please, if you are an outsider and are feeling affected by this whole thing or are confused, ignore it completely. This is THEIR problem not YOUR’S or MINE’S.
One or two conflicts shouldn’t go out if their way to involve unrelated people and suck the joy out of the entire community. Yes, I know one of them involves serious accusations, but as I said before, they could have handled the situation better and there is a lot of unclear information.
My point still stands, am not taking sides, do not come here and try to persuade me. Bc I won’t.
If after seeing this you disagree with me and no longer want to interact with me, that’s fine. I do not care.
Also if any of you need a break, that’s ok.
And am saying all of this because I learned it from personal experiences in other platforms. And bc am seeing how its affecting way more people than it should.
I will still be posting contend btw.
Anyways made some memes to cheer up a little.
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Hey so you've posted a bit about replaying DA and I wanted to know if you have a canon run through
I do! I'm currently replaying through my canon run right now [with a few deviations here and there] because every time I finish a run, some time passes before I'm like, ".........I miss them." It makes doing an alternate run harder, too.
For DAO, I play as a rogue lady Tabris named Rosalie, or Rose. Dual-wielding ranger and dualist. Her most used party dynamic is Alistair/Morrigan/Zevran. She named the mabari Griffon after the tales of Grey Wardens and their griffons. Rose romanced Alistair, kept him a warden and made Anora queen. She considers Morrigan one of her closest friends until Morrigan reveals her true intentions for coming with them. I've written about that whole thing before. Honestly, as far as companions go, Rose becomes close friends with most of them... except Wynne, they tend to butt heads in a lot of ways.
Rose didn't want to become a warden and thinks most of their rules and secrets are bullshit. Duncan's excuse for not coming to help her and the other elven women Vaughan took is a driving force for her to defy that "we can't get involved" rule as much as she can during and post-blight. She sided with the mages in Kinloch and with their help saved Connor, made Bhelen king of Orzammar, and settled things between the Dalish and the werewolves peacefully by convincing Zathrian to end the curse. She executed Loghain at the Landsmeet since, y'know... he sold city elves, nearly including her father, to Tevinter slavers to fund his war so... in her eyes, he doesn't get to live after that.
This playthrough I did make a save to reject Morrigan's dark ritual to see what happens when the warden makes the ultimate sacrifice and it's the most unsatisfying ending. It's such a, "No no noooo we didn't deserve this! After everything we went through! Just for it to end like that??" hopeless feeling... which was then fixed when I went back and made my canon choice of begrudgingly accepting the deal [even though it mostly goes against Rose's character but I'm weak and selfish and want her and Alistair to live].
In DA2, I play as a male mage Hawke named Edgar, or Ed. Force mage and blood mage. His most used party dynamic is Carver/Merrill/Anders until Carver goes to the Grey Wardens, then it's Isabela/Merrill/Anders. He's mostly purple in personality, but occasionally dips into blue, and I can count the number of times he's gone red on one hand. He named his mabari Fleabag after Malcolm bought the pup from a traveling merchant who failed to mention he was flea ridden. Several baths later, the mabari was finally flea free but Ed decided he should never live it down and named him Fleabag.
Ed maxes out the friendships with everyone [yes, including Carver, Ed tries so damn hard with him] except Aveline, he maxes out her rivalry. They all side with him and the mages in the end. He romanced Anders. I once did a run where I romanced Fenris with Ed and even though I liked it, the whole playthrough felt wrong because romancing Anders is, like... a fundamental part of Ed's story now... Even though they break up in the end.
I've done all three options across different playthroughs when it comes to Anders; I've spared him, I've killed him, and I've told him to leave. My canon choice is to tell him to leave, and then let him join my party later after we've sided with the mages. It's hard to explain without writing a full essay, but Ed and Anders are pretty much life partners at this point. Even if it's no longer romantic because a huge amount of trust was broken, even if they never get back together in that regard, even if Anders will now be on the run for the rest of his life, whether or not Ed agrees with him [he does and he doesn't, it's complicated] like... Ed loves him and he'll always love him, y'know? He won't abandon him even when everyone tells him he should.....but then DAI happened uhhh
Finally for DAI, I play a lady mage Lavellan named Ashalle, or Ashlaen, or just Ash. She's a knight-enchanter who mostly does storm magic. I'd say DAI is the game where I have a pretty even party use that I rotate between; Cassandra/Varric/Vivienne, Solas/Sera/Blackwall, The Iron Bull/Dorian/Cole. She sides with the mages in Redcliffe and left Hawke in the fade [sorry Ed, and sorry Anders... and sorry Carver... and Varric]. When it came to picking a ruler for Orlais, she figured all options sucked but went with Celene and Briala. Ash drank from the well, and then disbanded the inquisition in Trespasser.
I dislike how DAI just kinda plops your inquisitor into existence with only a small paragraph explaining why they were at the conclave; I wish it had a DAO approach so that's what I did for my inquisitor. Before I start the DAI playthrough, I boot up DAO. Before she was Ashalle Lavellan, she was a circle mage named Ashlaen Surana who escaped with Jowan after he lied to her about being a blood mage. In the ten years pre-DAI, she lost Jowan. In her grief, joined the Dalish, changed her name, and eventually ended up at the conclave. It just adds a lot more meat and spice to the choices and interactions with companions and advisors since she keeps that part of her backstory a secret. After all, she helped a blood mage and then was accused of being one herself before fleeing; she doesn't want the inquisition to know that. All of her crafted staves are named after Jowan while her crafted robes are usually named after her conflicting identities and pieces of her past, too..... Oh, speaking of past, she romanced Cullen. Because of course.
With the context of all this, it becomes them reuniting after they may or may not have had a thing going on in the circle, but then she escaped and he believed she was actually a blood mage for ten years. Cullen sees her like "Ah. Yes. You. Whom I haven't met. Hope they're right about you. We've lost a lot of people to get you here. Glad you survived." when internally he's screaming "I know who you are, those tattoos fool me not! Why are you here?? To torment ME specifically??" Then there's Ash who takes a little longer to recognize him, and when she does, it solidifies that she needs to run after this because he knows who she is and why she fled, that's not good, she's not going back to the circle after all this is done.
But y'know... they work it out. Eventually.
That's my canon run through of all three games. I keep trying to talk myself into doing a full alternate canon run, but the only game I've successfully done a different route in is DAI with my male rogue Tristan Trevelyan whose backstory was that he's a pro-mage ex-templar. That was fun to see how different things play out, but I haven't managed it for the other two.
I'd like to play DAO as a more cutthroat warden who, unlike Rose, won't go out of their way to do kind things; they'll do what they deem necessary. I'd like to do a lady warrior Hawke run with Bethany as the surviving sibling, and I've tried before but every time I hit a point where I'm like ".....I miss Carver so much" and abandon the run. Like there's always something that makes me abandon the run. I almost abandoned Tristan's run, too, but somehow I pushed through and got invested. I dunno. One day I'll put on my big girl pants and just do it.
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slutsosweet · 2 years ago
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read before following please!! <33
hi hii!! y’all can call me livi or kitty or baby or sweetheart or literally any other pet name; i’m not partial to any in particular. just the affection and praise is enough to make me melt into a lil puddle :’’)
if you are not at least eighteen years of age, please do not follow or interact with me or my posts. i will not engage with any minors and if any minors attempt to engage with me they will be blocked with no hesitation whatsoever.
this is a blog for my hard kinks because my attention-loving self isn’t satisfied unless i can make myself known everywhere lmao. there will be themes on my page that are triggering for some people, including cnc/consensual non-consent/rape play, and ddlg. full disclaimer: i do not support or make excuses for actual rape or pedophilia. anything i post implies prior consent between adults of sound mind and body, full stop. these are just fantasies, just scenes. if you are uncomfortable with them i completely understand and ask you to click away from my blog for your own safety and peace of mind.
i have a few hard limits that, should you bring up during horny talk, i will immediately block you or delete the ask or both:
- incest (even just mentioning my family at all tbh)
- pedophilia
- beastiality
- blackmail
that being said: i am 22 years of age, afab, and use she/her pronouns. in case you haven’t guessed yet, i am extremely subby and obedient. currently i am owned and taken by my boyfriend/dom, and i am a member of a pack. i am not looking for any online play partners; i am only looking for friends and likeminded acquaintances. i don’t mind interacting with and befriending doms online, but do not attempt to make me your sub. i am only comfortable with in person dynamics and that is final.
even so, you can still treat me like a sub, and i may address some doms using titles and respect, but that does not put us in a dynamic with one another.
i am here purely for icky horny thoughts of my own and reblogging stuff that makes my little cunt throb, but i am extremely friendly (and also a tad shy haha) so please don’t be afraid to reach out for literally any reason!!
please stay safe and take care of yourself <33
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michaelsfavgirl · 10 months ago
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˖⁺‧₊˚🎞️✮☎️✮🧸˚₊‧⁺˖ Welcome <3
Blog info, about me, masterlist, my socials, tag system, request rules & and taglist can be found here.
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— If you want to be added to my taglist please comment under this post
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✎ᝰ! My name is Kate, I'm nineteen, a Taurus and from West Asia.
✎ᝰ! I have been a fan of Michael Jackson since I was a child but I became a part of the fandom around 2019. My man is my no. 1 on Spotify every single year (yup, yup).
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✎ᝰ! For now I only write for mj.
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© michaelsfavgirl 2024
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breezy141 · 1 year ago
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Could you please do ig imagine where reader is Pedro’s so and fangirls him online
Like follows and comments on fan pages, posts ridiculous pictures and does silly lives with Pedro
hehehehe ABSOLUTELY!
if you guys have anything you would like to send me do not hesitate to ask !! love you all 🤞
>>>>>
number 1. fan // pedro pascal (masterlist)
pedros_updates
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liked by y/n and 1,971,047 others
pedros_updates some recent photos leaked from pedros and y/n vacation in spain! cute! ❤️
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pedropascalnews they are so perfect for each other kinda makes me wanna fly off a bridge 🤞
pascaldaily i don’t think you guys should be posting pictures of them they might not be comfortable with it, ny that i mean when they are on holiday :/
littlemissy/n hehe i love her !
y/n pedro really is the star of the photos tbh :)
y/nisforme she commented and followed ajsuehebrg congrats omfgg❗️❗️
pascalfan yayy! she commented congratulations! ❤️
y/n
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liked by pascalispunk and 6,296,018 others.
y/n my favourite boy :)
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xx.y/n_offical.xx awhh !
pascalispunk your spanish is extremely terrible but you’re still my favourite girl 🩷
y/nl0ve AAAA obsessed!
loveforyou mom n dad fr 💕
pascalpedro he’s so gorgeous wth
| y/n EXACTLY
pedroeditsSC love love love
y/n
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liked by bellaramsey and 7,693,012 others
y/n he a cutie patootie or whateva ☹️
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sluttfor.pascal if you two break up i’ll never believe in love again :)
bae_y/n i just know you two have the best memories together.
tired.y/n/n MAKIN ME FEEL SO SINGLE Y/N
bellaramsey bro i miss you both hurry up and hang out with me pls, i found a new arcade we can go to 😎
| y/n actually about to book a ticket home, i miss you :(
thatgirl idk if i wanna be you rn or be with you rn tbh
yup.pascal I AINT AFRAID TO SAY I LOVE THESE HOES
| y/n and tHEIR GLASSES AND THEIR JACKETS AND THEIR HIPSTER CLOTHES. love that song bae
pascalnews
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liked by y/n and 8,018,153 others
pascalnews picture creds: @photosbyolïver pedro and y/n found embracing each other outside of a nightclub ❤️
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yup.pascal bro they are actually soulmates. confirmed
pascaldaily i love them :/
y/n the support we get from you guys is incredible, i love you all. BUT I AGREE, zaddy.
| pascalfr LMAO ultimate zaddy
| y/n4eva noo we love you more !
>>>>>>INSTA LIVE<<<<<<
pedro laughed as he spun you around the kitchen, you were dancing to a song you both loved, which was also requested by your fans which accompanied you in pedros live. the song, sunday kind of love by etta james, unofficially was your song.
wirh pedros arms still wrapped around you, you leaned towards his phone and read some questions being asked in the comments “what is your pet peeve with one another?” you spoke. pedro pulled away “i love this question” he quickly said.
“what! why?”
“girlll, you know why!” you looked at him with a confused look
“okay so, let me explain. guys when she is on the phone whether that’s like scrolling on instagram or whatever, she’s always zoned out” you giggled knowing what he meant “LIKE she will be talking to me then just stop randomly!” pedro laughed along with you.
“okay okay. lemme say yours okay!” pedro nodded and crossed his arms looking all sassy.
“okay guys, so what this guy does is he will starfish on this bed when he is sleeping. the amount of times he has kicked me!” he let out a mischievous giggle “i don’t mean to!”
“mhmmm” pedro shook his head and looked through the comments once more.
“y/n how many tattoos do you have!!” pedro looked over to you.
“i have like three, i share one with this lady right here” pedro put his hand to his chest “and i have a little dog leash on the inner part of my wrist for my old doggie and then i have one down my spine”
“that one is pretty, it’s my favourite” pedro says with a cute smile “yeah?” he nodded.
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sandrayofsun · 1 year ago
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I may be Team Top??
As promised in my last post, I'm making a diary entry for TopMew!
I'll start by saying that I have not been a fan of this couple throughout the show, but I did like their characters separately. Something that I felt a lot throughout the series was the lack of chemistry and awkwardness surrounding TopMew. Mind you, I've watched "A Boss and a Babe," I KNOW ForceBook has chemistry.
In saying that, episode 8 has officially changed my mind on the TopMew train hehe.
Specifically this scene
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Mew's revenge era is honestly what made me like him the most... Unpopular opinion maybe, but I found it really relatable that he is doing things he normally doesn't do and becoming someone different. Top did a really shitty thing to him. Despite him being "perfect," being a virgin, having good grades, and being respectful, Top still cheated on him. It opened his eyes to the fact that no matter how "good" he is, people are still capable of doing shitty things to him.
So why not do all the things you've never done in the name of being hurt. No matter who he is, people can hurt him no matter what, might as well go out with a bang.
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The bathroom scene was interesting because it's the first "civil" conversation they've had since the whole fight blew out. and Top is now seeing the effects of his affair with Boston reflecting on Mew. Even with Mew rubbing Ray in Top's face, he still is only worried about Mew and what is happening to him.
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It's honestly slightly refreshing that Top isn't taking the jealousy approach because he knows that at the moment he's lost that right. He can't blame Mew for running to Ray because Top set him on that path.
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Top was presented to us as a selfish character, one who is used to getting what he wants, and not having much to work for (a little bit like Boston). Him going to Cheum and voicing his concerns for Mew, even taking a little bit of heat from Cheum (you go girl), shows character development on Top's part, and honestly gives me a little bit of hope for their end game.
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I want to touch on Mew for a sec, and his "relationship" with Ray.
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I think it is so intentional the way that they have framed this phrase for Mew and Ray. How Ray is someone that Mew "should" love, but obviously doesn't, because Mew loves Top and knows deep down that Ray will never fulfill that role in his life (the same way Mew can't fulfill that role in Ray's). Even hesitating to kiss him when they are alone is evidence enough that Mew is pretending.
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Curving Ray's kiss and saying they should go and have fun is ultimate "get me out of here" behavior. Mew doesn't want Ray. Simple as that.
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I also need to call out the fact that the next time we see RayMew kiss is because Mew is trying to prove a point to Top. Only then does he use Ray to make him jealous, but isn't actually willing to do it in private.
Top's face during this whole scene made me sad tbh. I really felt for him, he was manipulated by Boston and thrown under the bus by Nick. Overall, he did a shitty thing, but that doesn't mean he didn't love Mew or want to be a better person for him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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This scene called to action the fact that Mew is still jealous over Top. Calling him and Boston out for sitting next to each other and telling them they're free to hook up again was funny but also important to TopMew's relationship.
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Top still being there for Mew, helping him when he was throwing up and then sitting next to each other on the floor gave me MAJOR SandRay Episode 1 parallels. But also look at Mew :(
He's asking Top why he has to be an asshole because he still loves him. He is in love with an asshole :((((( and I'd like to point out that this scene was the MOST chemistry that I have seen from these two thus far.
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Both of them are hurt, and are hurting for the other. I think deep down, Mew wants to make amends, but also he needs to do this for himself. He needs to spiral a little bit to realize where he is headed. he needs to make Top hurt a little (as sad as that may be).
Top on the other hand is hurt because he did this. He caught feelings, and then messed up the person he loves. He doesn't know how to fix what he broke, but also knows that they are meant to be.
This is what really changed my mind on them. Before it felt like both of them had masks, and didn't really see each other, but now they're both at low points, and seeing each other for the first time. But still loving each other from afar despite the turmoil they're going through.
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Top taking care of Mew after everything at the end of the night was so heartwarming. A man who probably has never been one to take care of others, spending what little time with Mew he can get.
I'm really looking forward to seeing where these two go, and huge props to ForceBook for the amazing acting job they're doing!
See you guys next week!!
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iinryer · 5 months ago
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long post abt women and fandom. good morning
sorry this is a little bit ramble-y, and I don’t normally post stuff like this but bear with me, i am processing gjfhdhffh
first of all: this is NOT directed at anyone in particular. this is not about anyone or anything anyone has done. this is me, a lesbian, having some dialogue with myself about representation and the way people think and talk and engage with fictional lesbians! this is not a blast on anyone, just general mindfulness, and wanting to work through some of my own hesitation abt things.
im having a difficult time engaging w the grander audience turning the boys into dykes, because i can never be sure where they’re coming from, yknow? like why i was hesitant to post before (it took me over a year to post my butch buddie silhouettes) and why im not sure if i want to post some other for-fun doodling ive done…
bc there Are lesbians on the show. there are specifically Black Lesbians, canonically, on the show
and like. idk. i dont want the things i say or post to be fuel for anyone being weird yknow? My Fake Lesbians Are Not Better Than The Real Lesbians Already On The Show
and i know that, and i know my friends know that but. I don’t have control over how people take the things I make. and i don’t want that to inadvertently make someone get enthusiastic in the wrong way that makes like, for example, black fans of the show, or specifically maybe black lesbians who watch, see an influx in people being 10x more delighted by these white boy reduxes than the real actual lesbians on the show. and yeah, sure, we could say “it’s just because they’re like a shiny new toy!” but we all know that isn’t all of it.
LIKE. MAYBE THIS IS IRRATIONAL. but. idk i have a sizable audience, i get a lot of traction, the things i say and post travel sometimes! people see what i post. people engage with and build off of things that i post. and, historically, this fanbase is Really Fucking Weird About Women And People Of Color
for the most part, playing in this sandbox is just a fun exercise for me, a lesbian. don’t get me wrong, i LOVE blasting characters with my Dyke Laser Beam and making them into women who love women. I’ll do it all day every day. i had soooooo much fun drawing butch buddie. i live for that shit. but! idk! im happy kicking around my own funhouse, but i feel like i need to take all of that into account if i make any of that public. yknow? community responsibility or whatever. i know it’s not on me if someone takes it in a bad direction, but! if i was the one who inadvertently facilitated that! i will feel awful! and tbh, there’s no guarantee that I haven’t done that already!
im just having fun, and you should be too! but this stuff makes me nervous! i don’t have any control over other people, and i just don’t want to be the cause of easily avoidable discomfort for others.
this isn’t some great declaration, and I don’t really have a moral or a call to action, there’s not a real solution in this stream of consciousness post—in the grand scheme of things, this is all make believe and for fun! im just. idk. it feels really important to me to acknowledge that this could spiral in a way that’s actually kind of awful for Real Life Fans who have to see the way other fans engage with and talk about lesbians and black women.
this is something I’ve been thinking about for a while, and it’s been on my mind recently, but with the influx of chatter about it i just felt like it was maybe worth talking about.
anyway. i love u lesbians. im drawing more henren soon <3
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meggiejolly · 23 days ago
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"You were the first" (Outer Banks fanfic)
Prompt from @fictober-event Warnings: (somewhat) Major Character Death (offscreen), past child abuse, mention of overdose Pairing: JJ Maybank/Kiara Carrera Authors Note: I really don't know what this is, tbh. I meant to write a quick little fic mostly to get to my word count goal. It turned out longer and much angstier than I planed. It's my first OBX fic and I don't think I got the voices of the characters write yet. It's not edited at all, I might go over it in a few days and post an edited version on AO3, I'll see.
It was a normal afternoon, boring almost. Kiara and JJ were hanging out at the house, everyone else was off elsewhere. They were lounging, lazily passing a joint back and forth and lamenting that there wasn’t enough swell to go surfing. 
Their lazy afternoon was interrupted by a car pulling up. JJ cursed when he looked up to see the blue sheriff’s truck and threw the almost finished joint into an empty bottle.Then he jumped up and went over to meet Shoupe. 
“What the hell Shoupe? I didn’t even do anything this time!” He called out and Kie questioned if that was a smart thing to say to a cop while reeking of weed. But that was JJ for you. 
She followed after him more calmly. 
“Everything ok?”
Shoupe looked nervous and way too serious, but not pissed off at them. That couldn’t be a could sign. 
“I’m not here for that, no one’s in trouble.��� Shoupe paused and it seemed like he was bracing himself for something. 
“They found your father JJ.”
Kie could see JJ tense up but he shrugged nonchalantly. “He’s back in prison then?” 
Shoupe looked uncomfortable. “No. I’m sorry to have to tell you this JJ, but he has been found dead. It seems to have been an overdose.” 
Kie could see how JJ froze, so she softly pushed past him and smiled at Shoupe. 
“Thank you for letting us know Shoupe. Is it ok if he comes to the station tomorrow or something to handle things?” 
Shoupe hesitated for a moment, but with a look at the shock frozen JJ, he eventually nodded. 
“Alright. But please make sure he actually shows up.” 
Kie promised and Shoupe left. For a moment Kiara just stood there, almost as frozen as JJ was.
Then she shook herself mentally and touched JJ’s shoulder carefully. 
“Jayj, hey. Can I give you a hug?” 
That got JJ out of his stupor and he shrugged off her hand. 
"What? Nah, I'm good Kie. Good riddance to that asshole!" 
"JJ…" Kiara tried but JJ interrupted her. 
"It's a relief. Seriously. At least this way I don't have to kill him." He was pacing back and forth now, all nervous energy that Kie was afraid could turn destructive really fucking fast.
"I almost did once you know? Remember that gun we found in that hotel room? I held it to his head when he was passed out on the couch. Was this close" He held up his hand, thumb and pointer finger almost touching, "to pulling that trigger."
Kie wanted to say something, but she didn't find the right words before he continued. 
"Should have known I'd just have to wait, he was bound to do himself in sooner or later. Don't know why I bothered to steal those pills from him when he left that last time."
JJ continued pacing and talking for a while. He said terrible things that had tears running down Kie's face. She really wanted to hug him, kind of wanted to resurrect Luke Maybank just to kill him again. JJ deserved so much better than that fucking monster of a father. 
But she couldn't reach JJ, it was probably better to just let him get it all out and when he eventually ran out of steam she would be there for him. She would hold him and call the other Pouges here and they would remind him he had a family that loved him and would always be there for him. 
Until then she'd just have to stomach what JJ was saying and curse herself for looking away for so long. 
Eventually JJ sank down on a sun lounger and buried his head in his hands. "Fuck." He mumbled, "I can't believe he's dead." 
Kie sat down next to him and this time he didn’t shrug her off when she put an arm around his shoulder. 
“He was a fucking waste of space, a grade an asshole and I hated his guts!” JJ said and Kiara could feel him shaking. She pulled him closer. 
“But he’s my Dad and I love him.” His voice was shaking and Kiara was pretty sure he was crying. She hadn’t seen JJ cry since the day in the hot tub. 
She admired him for still being able to love his dad, even after everything he had put him through. JJ had the biggest heart out of anyone she knew and loved so unconditionally, it was so fucking unfair that his parents couldn’t see that or give him the love he deserved. 
“I know you do JJ, that’s ok.You’re allowed to feel those things at the same time. You can grieve him and be relieved at the same time.” 
Some of the tension seemed to drain out of JJ and he turned to lean into Kiara. His arms went around her and she could feel him silently crying into her shoulder. 
There wasn’t much more to do than to hold him, hum softly and pet his hair, hoping she could give him a little bit of comfort. 
After a while JJ sighed and straightened up. 
“Thanks. I… fuck I needed that. I’m sorry Kie.” 
Kiara shook her head and ducked down a little to look into his eyes. “Hey, no. You don’t need to apologize for needing a hug or crying. I’m here for you, whatever you need.” 
JJ gave her a weak smile. “Thank you. That… that means a lot.” 
Kie smiled back and then reached over to grab one of their beer bottles. It was probably warm now and well on its way to flat, but something to drink would be good after the crying. 
To her surprise, JJ hesitated.  
“I’m… not sure I should drink right now. I really don’t want to end up like him, you know?”
“Yeah. Yes of course. Let me get you some water or something. Be right back.” 
Kiara went into the house and grabbed them each a bottle of water. 
"Heads up!" She called when she came back and tossed a bottle at JJ who caught it easily. 
"Thanks." 
They sat in silence next to each other, sipping their water until JJ eventually said. "You were the first you know?"
"The first what?"
"The first person I ever told that my father hit me." 
Kiara looked at him surprised. "I was?" 
JJ didn't look at her. "Yeah. You had just started hanging out with us a couple of weeks ago and I showed up with a big bruise on my arm. You just asked me what happened and I told you. All nonchalantly, that my dad had done it. I don't think you believed me, you never brought it up again. I don't even know why I told you, I was always so careful back then to make up believable stories for all my bruises, but something about the way you asked me, just made me tell you the truth."
Kie swallowed. "Oh. I… I don't remember that. I guess I must have not believed you. I'm really sorry about that Jay. I should have told someone—"
JJ interrupted her. "No, you shouldn't have. They would have not believed me, and he would have gotten so mad. Or worse they would have taken me away from all of you. It's ok, I handled it. That's why I never told John B. or Pope. Or you a second time, because I was afraid you'd tell your parents and they would do something." 
Kie put her arm around him again. "You shouldn't have had to handle it. I'm so sorry you had to go through that." 
JJ just shrugged, but didn't make her take away her arm. 
"Big John didn't know?" Kie asked after a moment.
JJ shrugged again. "He must have suspected. He asked some pointed questions sometimes, but I was very careful never to let anything slip in front of him, so I guess he didn't think he had enough proof to do anything. He did tell me I was always welcome at the Chateau, which was the only help I wanted anyways." 
Kie nodded thoughtfully. 
"Do you want me to let the others know?"
"Nah, I'll tell them when they get back. Don't want to ruin their day with this."
"They would want to be there for you."
"Yeah, but… they can do that later. Right now you being here is all I need." He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "Thanks for that."
Kie kissed him back and smiled. "Of course, always."
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slicznymartwy · 1 year ago
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hiiiii i have something really short (i can’t remember if i already posted this tbh since i wrote it a few weeks ago ..)
billy x sorority reader
no actual billy in this one. only implied billy. the notion of billy.
You love your sorority sisters, you love being in a sorority, you love sharing a house with them - all things you have to remind yourself when come home to the sound of sobbing in the living room.
Hesitating by the front door, you glance at the stairs and wonder if it’s possible to get away without being noticed.
Unfortunately, you make the mistake of looking back at the girls and see Clare’s pleading eyes. You sigh, condemned to acting like you don’t know what this is all about.
“What‘s wrong?” you ask, anxiously eyeing the crying girl on the couch.
It was Kathy, if the shrill wailing was any indication; she was in the same year as you, but you were never close to each other. Not that you minded, based on how she was blubbering into Clare’s ear.
“She lost her new camera,” Clare says through a sympathetic pout by Kathy’s side, rubbing her back.
“I didn’t lose it!” Kathy snaps at Clare, before putting her face back into her hands. Glancing at Barb on the other couch, who was shamelessly ignoring the theatrics, you pray to get out of this unscathed.
“Should we look for it?” you offer, despite the fact that you would rather tear your face off than search for the camera. You don’t know how long you can act like you don’t know where it is.
“We already searched the entire house,” Clare says with a little sigh. “The only place we haven’t looked is the attic, but we’re sure no one would take it up there.”
“Definitely not the attic,” you say, as convincingly as you can manage. You’ve never been a great actor, but Kathy and Clare both nod in agreement.
Suddenly, Kathy lets out a frustrated groan, hitting her hands against her thighs. You hadn’t noticed it before when she looked at Clare, but now you can see how her mascara was smudged and running down her cheeks.
You almost feel bad, but only almost. Kathy had a funny way of sapping due sympathy whenever she opened her mouth.
“My parents are going to kill me! Don’t you have any idea how much that thing costs?” Kathy cries. From the couch, Barb sighs and finishes her drink.
“Then you shouldn’t have lost it,” she mumbles, getting up and beelining to the liquor cabinet.
“I didn’t lose it! I put it on my desk before bed, so I wouldn’t forget to take it with me today, but when I woke up, it was gone! Someone stole it!”
You shift in your boots, the wooden floor creaking underneath you.
“Come on, let’s look in your room again,” Clare says sweetly, hooking her arm through Kathy’s.
“I already did!” she insists, but she lets herself get dragged off the couch and up the stairs anyways.
You still feel a little queasy as you shuffle over to the now vacant couch, falling onto it with a heavy sigh and taking up the length of it with your legs. Cracking open an eye, you see Barb take the same position on the opposite couch, careful to keep her glass upright.
“I don’t know why she lets herself get so worked up. It’s just a camera, no need to get hysterical,” Barb complains to the ceiling.
Closing your eyes again, you nuzzle your head into the pillow and nonchalantly say, “You don’t think someone actually stole it, do you?”
Barb scoffs, and you can hear her ice cubes rattle as she sips her drink.
“No way. If losing things were an Olympic sport, she’d be a gold-medalist,” Barb says, unknowingly calming your racing heart. “Seriously, she lost a record player two weeks ago. A record player. Who does that?”
“No way, really?” Laughing, you feel the last of your tension leave your body. Barb hums a mhm, and you decide there’s no harm in letting Billy keep the camera. From the sound of it, she’d probably lose it one way or another.
Now, if only you can grab the rest of her film from her desk. It’s not like she’ll get any use out of them, and Billy’s almost out.
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shesmore-shoebill · 6 months ago
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i loveeee disaster/pining!amanda in amangela HOWEVER i pitch you this: disaster/pining!amanda in courtmanda. amanda who shouldnt be surprised that courtney’s very flirty/affectionate but somehow Always Is Suprised when the energy is directed back at her. courtney who sees a blushing/stammering amanda for the first time and is absolutely delighted (and maybe a little bit surprised) that They were the one who caused that reaction
AUGH COURTMANDA MY BELOVED. Excellent timing sending this to me right before we got fed with fantastic Courtmanda in the new FNAF video.
That said: OOOH disaster/pining Amanda in a Courtmanda context. HMM.
Okay, preface: I'm going to say a lot of things here. Again, this is all personal RPF characterization and is not supposed to actually be about the real people. Its about the RPF alternate universe versions I've decided on.
So from what I have in my head, disaster/pining Amanda doesn't look the same as it would for Amangela, because where Angela doesn't usually lean into the kissing/flirting bits with the same level of enthusiasm/isn't the type to initiate them, at least with Amanda, (hence why flirting back would be so jarring). Like you're saying Courtney (and Amanda tbh) is the kind of person to:
1- Flirt incessantly with people for the bit,
and
2- If challenged, would COMMIT to the bit with zero hesitation
and
3- Willing to kiss a friend, no worries.
So in my head, with their existing dynamic it seems less likely for Amanda to be completely caught off guard by just the fact of Courtney flirting/flirting back. (TBH I think its fun to have their dynamic already have an inherent flirtiness to it, that in Courtmanda universes can lead to Confusion or Hijinks. See this post). So to really SELL it I feel like there has to be an extra level to it that turns the existing dynamic on its head. Catches Amanda off guard or some extra flavor to the obliviousness. And I find it VERY fun to have the disaster part of this be Amanda committing harder to flirting if she's panicking about Courtney, because Courtney would commit BACK, and that kind of escalation always opens up fun in stories. AND, at the point where Amanda does get completely flustered/tongue-tied the payoff is that much more significant.
And there's a few fun ways this can go, trope-wise, I think. Courtney dials it up and Amanda was fine about it before (ignoring her feelings) but the ramp up in intensity flipped SOMETHING in her head she can't ignore angmore, and now Courtney is flirting and Amanda is panicking/flirting back with a definite edge of panic and Courtney can. Tell. For angst or more plot, the fact that the affection is already there can cause confusion! Misunderstanding! What's joke flirting and what's real? What's a bit and what isn't? Even if its not a bit for her, is it for them? etc. Plenty of fun ways to take the Courtmanda disaster dual flirting dynamic.
That said, the "already always flirty Courtmanda" is just a personal characterization thing on my part, and this is RPF, none of this is real, so we dont need to do that. If we don't commit to their existing dynamic already being flirty the imagery of a flustered Amanda and deeply pleased Courtney is still SO good. Amanda flirts with everyone and Courtney flirts back and Amanda goes. 😳. Courtney as a fun silly little guy and Amanda as a charismatic force laying on the charm with everyone but Courtney does something back and Amanda loses it a little. Flirts weird. Gets goofy. Little compliments get to her. Something something the rpf extension of Amanda constantly calling Courtney cool or complimenting her style in random places in videos. And Courtney continues to be affectionate because they just ARE affectionate and Amanda (also known affectionate person!) is losing her cool over it way more than she should be. Oh man. I do love this concept actually.
(For angst route- miscomm! misunderstanding! Amanda going "Oh Courtney is like this with everyone, it doesnt mean anything". Courtney taking Amanda's slightly strange reactions as 'oh she doesnt like me doing this/feel this way'. Ah shit I've just swapped the Amangela dynamic).
Anyway. Lots of fun potential here. Love the Courtmanda dynamic. Maybe a fun plot idea regarding S&B filming and Amanda seeing a new side of Courtney that shifts her world a little bit.... 👀 hmm.
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wilhelmsbee · 9 months ago
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Okay now I also would like a director's commentary, if you'd be willing to do that!
First of all for the book discussion edit you did which is.....INSANITY ...literally one of the best edits ever ever ever
And also maybe "real funny that things go to hell now that I've found it" because I think it's criminally underrated!!
Also, feel free to pick one of those haha and I might take you up on more some time haha
I am gonna do them both but I'll be doing the second one in a standalone post! Starting with this edit!
because this edit has no lyrics I'm gonna do it like the line of dialogue & the scenes played instead :P
And what do you think the dilemma is?- Starting with the actual scene, Simon is asked the question by the teacher, basically showing that the edit is going to be entirely about Simon's interpretation of the book Kris, which is used as a parallel for wilmon! The text is purple for the teacher, but that's also the colour I use to represent wilmon as a couple so its a little nod to that as well :)
That Malin has grown up with strong Christian ideals, that...- Wilhelm walking through the castle, trying on Erik's old jacket, paralleling Wilhelm's upbringing as a Prince to an extremely religious upbringing. He's been raised in this place, with its long-standing traditions and deep beliefs that permeate into the modern world. He's surrounded by this institution and even though he tries his best to be himself and accept who he is, obviously it has fundamentally carved out his brain in a specific way. The royal upbringing is what made him so afraid of his sexuality, and even when he accepts that there are still parts of him that naturally fall into that safe self-serving mindset.
She has trouble combining with how she really feels.- Wilhelm is left out when August and Erik get to see each other, the etiquette book being forced into his hands, leaving Simon after his mother told him 'no more mistakes.', telling Simon that their kiss was a mistake. He doesn't know how to fit into either box, Prince or Wilhelm. He's in a completely new space and all he's trying to do is be exactly what everyone wants him to be, what he's expected to be. He struggles during the photo-op because he wants to be himself, but he's quickly reminded that he should actually just follow everyone else and fit the mould. This mindset is what makes him leave Simon in E4. He's struggling to find the line between what his upbringing expects of him and what he actually wants, and he can't manage to thread that needle no matter how much he wants to. The one time he figured it out, realising his mistake and backtracking, it didn't change anything. He was forced back into that same box. Despite his best efforts, Wilhelm doesn't know how to balance his title and himself.
Especially about Siv.- The anxious hovering before the kiss in episode 4. He's desperately trying to reassure himself this is okay and that he's allowed to be happy and accept himself even as the Prince. It's all he has, nobody else around him cares like Simon does, and still, he has to hesitate, he's afraid that once he crosses that line he can't go back. I always thought this mirrored the party scene, when Wilhelm looked like he wanted to kiss Simon, but the show cuts before we see (and I don't think they did kiss here tbh). He's so terrified of crossing these barriers he's made in his head, consciously or not, because once he does how will he go back? How could he go back? He doesn't know where to put these feelings, there's no space between his royal upbringing and societal expectations. Both of these scenes feel like a free-fall jump. He's risking everything just to see. To feel something that he's held back from himself, allow himself that experience. Get to know himself.
You wish that Malin could just ignore them,- The outside pressures on Wilhelm rearing their ugly heads. He's a poster-child for Hillerska, especially since Henry confirms that the school board thought Wilhelm would bring more students to the school. The plaque reminding him that he is responsible for the legacy of the school causes him to spiral, because he's a public figure whose name can never be separated from the school but he might be falling for a boy who he can't ever really be with, and he hates it. His mother reminding him that he can't make any more mistakes, that he's the sole heir to the throne and he needs to make the family proud, it just cements this fear. Wilhelm is stuck in this cycle of accept himself/ outside pressure to conform/ accept himself... and it's wearing him down already. He's taking his mother's words and applying them to what he knows she wouldn't like, even though she doesn't know about it. [You] in this scenario is Simon, or at least Wilhelm's interpretation of Simon. He imagines it's irritating watching him go between reaching out and pulling back, how draining it must be for Simon, but he also knows that there's no easy solution to this problem.
I mean, the duties and ideas about God- Again, God in this context is the Royal Family. Wilhelm giving his pre-written speech, Wilhelm giving his pre-planned lie about the tape. These scenes show his duties to the throne. He needs to keep up appearances, come hell or high water. There's a distinct lack of emotion in both scripts (though he does go off-book after Erik's passing, but this isn't a public space, so it makes sense). He is just following exactly what is expected of him, with no real personal attachment, even though both of these things are extremely emotional events. His duty to the Royal Family is to pretend that everything is fine, all the time. To rid himself of his humanity, just be the figurehead he's supposed to be.
It's not just coming from outside, it's her own fault, too.- Wilhelm's admission. It's not just the Royal Court deciding his actions, his every word, thought, and movement. He's accepting blame for himself, too. It's something he's been extremely hesitant to do in the series up until this point, but it was extremely necessary. Wilhelm's acceptance of fault is what helps reform that trust with Simon. It was Wilhelm's own recklessness that almost got him taken out of school, and it was his own naivety that made him believe Simon could trust him post-tape-denial. Yes, there were outside sources, but he wasn't acting as a puppet for the Royal Family, he was making his own decisions as well, and he's acknowledging the hurt that it brought to Simon. A lot of Wilhelm's S2 arc is related to taking responsibility and understanding the pain he's caused, as well as trying to amend it to the best of his ability. Of course, he still messes up, he's a teenager, but he puts in as much effort as he can.
She has been forced to...- I always thought the Queen manipulated Wilhelm by using the dead-brother-card to ensure he didn't confirm the sex tape. He was forced into giving that statement, and I think at this point Simon has begun to realise just how much power and reach Wilhelm's family (more specifically his mother) has over him and his own existence. He's forced to be this perfect son, with no problems, not a hair out of place, and it has shaped him. Even when Wilhelm fights against the manipulation, he knows that it's not going to work, because everyone around him is willing to do whatever it takes to get him to agree. Jan-Olof doesn't care about Wilhelm's upset at the song changing, all he has to do is say 'The Queen Requested It' because he knows that's all Wilhelm needs to hear to back down. His mother knows this, too. Although Wilhelm has free will and makes a lot of bad decisions on his own, his mother's ability to control and manipulate him only makes those bad decisions worse.
Follow those rules.- Wilhelm just wants to be the perfect son, and considering the fact the show starts on a PR disaster, it makes sense that he's doing anything he can to fix that public perception. He won't speak about politics because Royals are supposed to be politically neutral, even though he clearly isn't politically neutral. He tries to thread the needle, which endears Simon but also shows his fear of further repercussions. He's already lost so much after the fight video, so he's on his best behaviour now. Even months later, he still struggles with regulating emotions and suppressing his anxiety, causing him to be mad at himself for not doing enough. Not being the perfect boy who doesn't want to be openly queer and isn't upset that his ex-boyfriend has a new boyfriend. He can't pretend that he feels okay with these rules, but he also can't let himself bend them. The breakdown after the first kiss is the biggest reflection of this. Yes, he kissed Simon back the second time, but once he was reminded that this was real life where others were nearby and there could be public ramifications to being caught like that, suddenly he's desperately spewing out anything that could remotely sound like he's straight. When Simon actually listens and tries to leave, though? That's also bad. He can't break the rules, but he also can't imagine letting this go. The rules he has to follow just trample him and cause more harm than good, and Simon recognises this.
She can't just throw away everything she's ever learned about right and wrong.- Mostly just highlighting the differences between when Wilhelm was kissed by Felice and when he was kissed by Simon. The kiss with Simon felt right, he was surprised but wanted it to continue. The kiss with Felice didn't. He can't throw away everything he's learned about what's right and wrong for him. It kind of was supposed to spin the line on its head. It's not what he's been taught as right and wrong, but what he's learned, from experience.
She discovers that- The therapy session with Boris, the one where Wilhelm realises he actually can be emotionally vulnerable with Simon and tell him how he feels, and let him be informed. He's finally learning that he has some say and control in his life, that it isn't just predetermined because of who he is and what he was born into. There's this change in expression that emphasises his sudden realisation, like his whole world has been spun on its head.
She wants to change her life,- Confronting Simon with his feelings!!! Simon had asked him to just be open and honest, and for once, he actually is. He wants to change, he wants to have control in his life, and he wants to pursue what's actually important to him! Of course, he tells Simon don't charge August because then I can't abdicate BUT he gives him the option to do whatever feels right. He isn't demanding control of a situation which is out of his hands, he's just letting Simon know his options. Also he apologises and is the bigger person about the wrongs he's done, he's changing for the better. His love is making him better.
Because of what she learns through her feelings for Siv.- Wilhelm has grown a lot throughout the course of his relationship with Simon, even when they weren't together a lot of his growth is centred around Simon and wanting to fix their relationship- and by extension himself. Happy, silly wilmon contrasted with more emotional and sad wilmon not only shows how much they've been through together, how much they've faced together, but also just hammers home the depth of their connection. Wilhelm feels safe and vulnerable with Simon, and Simon feels comfortable and happy with Wilhelm. They're always reaching out or touching each other in these scenes, the constant affection between them just emphasises their love and connection which is what this edit is all about.
So it isn't all bad, and we don't know what happens after the book ends.- - More wilmon comforting each other, lots of touching and holding and love. Even when their relationship is in a bad place, there's still that love and care there in every action they do together. Everything they do is an output of their love- even when they're upset and fighting is because they love each other and they're hurt and don't know how to express it. They just want to hold each other together and keep close, and the beauty in that pure expression of love just carries through the scenes so nicely. They're in love your honour!!!
Closing Scene- I chose this scene because it is just such a perfect encapsulation of wilmon to me. The soft, gentle movements and the warm lighting, the comfort and safety they feel... it's also my favourite scene in the whole show but that's just my opinion etc... truly what I want is for wilmon to have a silly little morning after scene that isn't tainted with the agony to come. We don't know what happens after young royals ends, but I imagine it is gonna be that scene every morning because they're in love!!!!! and I do not care what anyone else says!!!
FONT CHOICE
The font I used is I'm DW pica!!! it's the folklore/evermore font, and I think it has storytelling vibes and that kinda links back to the whole It's A Story For English Class thing :P
Also the text changes colour between Simon's voice and Wilhelm's voice because usually (read: if I'm making my edit like a conversation) I'll colour the texts to match who's speaking (or who matches the current lyrics, or who's POV I'm editing from). When I do this, Simon's text is always a yellow-gold and Wilhelm's is always a teal-blue.
COLOURING
The beginning of the edit has a pale pinky-reddy colouring over it, it's quite desaturated and it's supposed to feel quite cold and hopeless. In sadder edits I'll usually use a red/pink/purple or sometimes a blue pallet for colouring, and it'll be very desaturated. However, by the line she discovers that the colouring actually shifts to a warm golden tint (most of the time my gold colourings are modified from the S1E5 opening scene). Basically showing how he's gaining control and hope and life is looking better and happier :)
by the way how I shift colours in edits is literally just having two layers with the different colour overlays and making one go from 0-100% opacity at the same rate as the other goes from 100-0%. It looks pretty smooth imo :3
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saskiavalentineapologist · 7 months ago
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sketch time
you will sit down. you will look at my horrible little women. And You Will Appreciate Them
no this is NOT going under a cut you will see the blood sweat and tears i put into belialah's demon form and you will appreciate it, me, and saskia's off the charts world class monsterfucker status
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we got saskia. we're familiar with saskia--or at least you should be. go look at the art by korppipoika and give them so many notes--this post will wait. and while you're out, look at the post about the matriarchs too. and if you're not up to date on saskia and belialah, here's another one for your list. i'll be here when you get back.
up to date? excited? horny? me too!!
so we got those two. in order for the images: saskia (recent), belialah (first draft, still happy with this and haven't been able to capture this vision since)
we got their dynamic:
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saskia being a bitch and belialah being, despite everything, head over heels. still can't quite nail belialah's human face, but we're learning
...it took me a long time to nail down belialah's demon form. it went through a lot of drafts---many of which i am not sharing. this one is the oldest one i'm willing to share:
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i believe this is draft 3? patch notes from earlier drafts: 4 fingers instead of three, took out "humanoid" eyes, added floaty halo bits. other than that, this is what it's mostly stayed true to. chase gave me an inspo and i remixed it and made it worse because i love body horror. so we have this! extra joint between the wrist and elbow, loads and loads of eyes, sharp teeth (yum!), wings, and a broken halo plus the big horn. love her. she has spider legs below her waist--she has "skirts" that are made from her skin that she usually wears (has?) over them.
made some eensy sketches for ideas:
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i tinkered on size, proportion, posture, etc. it's vague, but not exact for either of them. i want a bigger height difference and this is for me first and foremost
i settled on this body type for saskia:
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no nipples so she's not naked :) this is for anatomy reference, tumblr. ANATOMY. be so nice to me ;-;
ignore the stuff at the edges, this is part of a larger project idk if i'll finish where i look at all the matriarchs and their body types. saskia is the most...well, besides ethalind, the most hourglass shape. this is the most recent drawing of her i have besides the one at the very end, this is the one i would say is most canon. hence why it is included--the last one i have doesn't quite hit right for me. still working on consistency.
as i improved my art, i wanted to take another stab at belialah. which meant figuring out her lower half.
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i did these ones reeaaally recently. i looked at so many things for inspo: crabs, spiders, human pelvises, centaur speculative biology, drider speculative biology, an introspective look at how much of a monsterfucker i am, etc. until i found something i was happy with. these are within the last few days. the lil sketches at the far bottom right of the first page are what i settled on. after that, i tinkered with how she looks with skirts vs no skirts---ignore the sword, it's no longer accurate to what it actually looks like, but that's endgame shit and no spoilers :)
i'm really happy with how she's turned out and i think she's kickass and awesome and i can't wait to beat her and saskia into the ground.
and then we have:
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team gaslight gatekeep girlboss :)
i drew this last night!! really happy with how my art is coming along. i hesitated on whether to draw the skirts, because i think the spider legs are so fucking cool and i know logically the skirts are there but tbh its funner drawing the spider legs than the skirts :(
i want to make it very clear: belialah is submissive in the way a guard dog is submissive, to quote a post i once tagged as gilt and lost. belialah is loyal, devoted, willing to protect--but will wait for an order before acting
btw, to make something else clear: saskia? saw the demon form first. is more attracted to the demon form than the human form. is far more willing to smash with belialah in demon form. i love my weirdest little freak of a woman <3
ok that's all bye
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phoenixisobsessed · 2 months ago
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{*.•YAPPING POST•.*}
For all of my devoted silly little followers who apparently love my yapping ✨ (xoxo love you guys)
Guys I ong woke up to like so many new asks I’m gonna be busy when I’m done with classes for the day. Speaking about asks, I have like two “phantom asks”. Idk what else to call it but I constantly have like two extra in my inbox that don’t exist. Like my inbox says 11 rn but there are actually only 9. It’s been like this for the longest time idfk. Anyway still excited to draw alla your silly little asks ;3.
Also I been thinking about the 18+ stuff, and I been slightly thinking about making a second account for it, but at the same time I feel like two accounts for me is too much to manage for me personally. I might just always make 18+ stuff under the cut in a post with a sfw doodle above the cut so minors who follow me don’t just get it shoved on them, but tbh, my account has never been advertised as for people under 18. Like I think on of the first polls (if not THE first) i made, was literally asking if this account should be freaky and not, and the result turned out to be “a bit of both” but I can see while catformers was going that probably got lost to time. But I’m still hesitant on making a second account because idk. Second accounts have just never been for me, and I don’t really do them. I like to have my blog as just the full experience of me doing whatever tf I want. I mean, from now-on out it’s advertised as mildly 18+, so newer people know at least. That’s gonna be my opinion on it.
Also guys like this week I’m doing some craazy painting things. Context: I like working with acrylics a bit more abstract. My digital and traditional art styles are both wildly different so I kinda wanna show you guys the other stuff I’m making in class. The one I’m doing today actually has some transformers related stuff so I may post both of my works later today HEHE. (My hands are constantly drowning in paint.)
I have (I think) like 5/15 ocs finished btw so like…if you want to request me revealing more, then by all means, go on HUEHEU. For now I just have them as filler if I don’t have any asks that day but it DEFINITELY seems to be a problem I only THOUGHT I would have. You guys are in my inbox like crazy (/positive giggling and kicking my feet I love drawing robots)
That’s my yapping for now. I need to leave lunch and get back to class. See you on the other side, soldiers.
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lepusrufus · 2 years ago
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Bestie please tell us that thought process. Yeah I genuinely enjoy your madness
Oh boi okay buckle up besties
So first off Caitlyn and Cassandra’s dogs (Sniper and Revolver respectively) are the same breed, loosely based on dobermans looks-wise, but made for hunting and colder weather. A bit of a reference to how they're a bit more similar than one may believe from a first glance, especially with certain traits like stubbornness or leadership skills. The symbolism is kinda flipped in the dogs though because they do look similar at a first glance, but they have quite different personalities. But it's there. You get my point.
Also they're the dogs from the painting, or at least the same breed/descendants/what have you.
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Revolver is actually quite huge even for the breed standard. He's big and scary and extremely well trained, but also a bit of a cuddly couch potato whenever the chance arises. Cassandra will deny any and all accusations of spoiling him, but everyone knows better.
Sniper is younger and restless. He's the kind of dog you simply cannot keep inside for too long and, just like his human, has to get into trouble despite also being quite well trained. Would follow Caitlyn into the woods with 0 hesitation.
Tobias has Shottie (short for Shotgun), who's the oldest and calmest of the bunch. She's based on retriever breeds because I have a hc that he prefers to hunt for waterfowl as opposed to big game like his wife and daughter. She gets pampered by literally everyone. As she should.
If you haven't noticed, they all have very On Theme names because the Kirammans are huge nerds and I take 0 criticism.
Anyway moving on to Vi.
Her dog is based on a Belgian Malinois, but tweak it a little towards hunting. These dogs can basically do parkour what more do I have to say?
(I'm debating going on bc I actually want to write this but tbh chances are everyone will forget abt this post until then lmao) This was a puppy gifted to the Kirammans by a neighbor while they were all on vacation at the Winter Estate. While trying to decide on a name, Cassandra actually suggests Vi being the one to pick, symbolism of Vi being part of the family and included in these rituals of theirs.
She settles on Atlas (name suggested by Finch in a flash of genius. Hey Finch)
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khalaris · 1 year ago
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Twenty Questions for Fic Writers
Ooh lots of fun questions, thank you @justhugsplz for tagging me <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
25.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
61,430 which is absolutely mind-boggling to me. And of those about 45k are Tatort Wien. Which I started writing exactly one year ago. For comparison, I've been writing fanfic for over 20 years and until I fell into Tatort fandom in 2021 I'd posted less than 3k in total.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Exclusively Tatort Wien at the moment. If I ever manage to peek my head out of that particular rabbit hole, I might get back to some Münster WIPs. Not in the near future, though :D
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Aufgeben -> Der Anruf -> Die Welt in unseren Händen -> Bordsteingespräche -> Loslassen
Haha, Tatort Münster with a little sprinkle of Wien. I don't usually sort by kudos, so it's a bit surprising to see Die Welt in unseren Händen rank so high. Well, high in a range between 75 and 34. That's just how it is in small fandoms :D
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes, always. Sometimes it takes a while to get to it. But I always want to take the time and energy to write a proper response, because a) if someone else took the time and energy to tell me how they feel about my story, the least I can do is tell them how much I appreciate them commenting. and b) A comment always feels like the start of a conversation to me. I remember the long comment/discussion threads under fanfic on Livejournal and I miss the community of that. Nowadays it often feels like there's this growing gulf between author and reader, probably because of the current content creator/consumer culture that does little to invite equality or discussion.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Silence, a Torchwood CoE fic about John Frobisher's last moments.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Bordsteingespräche. I'm really proud of how everything came together in the end in that one :)
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Nope, thankfully never.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
If you'd asked me that a month ago, I would have said no. But recently I kind of got over my terminal embarrassment at even trying to write anything smutty. I haven't posted anything yet, but there's several fics/chapters in the works. Tbh I don't find vanilla sex interesting and most of the usual kinks in fanfic are either squicks or a snooze-fest to me. The stuff that I am writing is either weirdly specific kink or just downright unsexy (which my characters are having a frankly outrageous amount of fun with atm, bless them).
I'm a bit hesitant to put any real smut in a fic that isn't actually primarily about the smut. I fear enough people might be put off by that, so hardly anyone would end up reading it then. Bit of a stupid fear to have, perhaps, but still...
(Yes, I know, I should just get over it and simply write and post whatever the hell I want 😅)
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I've had a lot of crossover ideas over the years, but the only thing I've ever written was an MCU/Agents of Shield thingie I hacked out during NaNoWriMo a couple of years ago. Let's be honest, that combination is the least crazy crossover of all time and hardly counts as a crossover at all. Like 99% of the stuff I've ever written during NaNo, it's completely horrible, unfinished and should never see the light of day again.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Don't think so.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I've translated Bordsteingespräche myself, but was very unhappy with the result, which is why it's unavailable at the moment. It's going to get reworked at some point.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Many many years ago, when the world was still young and some of you not yet born 😂, the lovely @hope-calaris and I cooked up a tentative plot for a rather ambitious Star Trek: Voyager fanfic. We didn't end up writing that one, but later co-wrote a CSI: Miami one with someone else iirc and I believe there might have been a 4400 (?) fic, also. Due to depression, my memory of that time is hazy at best, though, so it's possible that I'm missing or misremembering things there.
14. What’s your all time favourite ship?
Didn't expect this question to be so difficult to answer, but is kinda is... 🙈 I guess any combination of my 3 Tatort Wien blorbos. Apart from that, Boerne/Thiel and Stephen Strange/Tony Stark are ships I can always come back to.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
The aforementioned MCU/AoS time-travel epic.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Dialogue, especially banter-y dialogue. And editing sentences/paragraphs for maximum impact (when I take the time to do it)
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Action. What characters are doing, how they're moving, getting them from A to B and so on. Ugh.
External conflict. I despise conflict in real life and find it extremely difficult to write. You won't find an antagonist in any of my current stories or wips. And when I do write conflict between characters, that's always rooted in their internal conflicts and mostly the result of them not communicating properly.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
It's very hard to do right. Translations in footnotes are annoying and leave me confused while reading. Translations in brackets behind the dialogue also annoying and missing the point of having different-language dialogue in the first place. It can be good when the author puts enough context there that you can get the gist of what is being said without needing an actual translation.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
X-Files. There's probably some 23-year old notebooks in the back of a drawer somewhere at my mom's house that have fanfic snippets mixed with homework assignments.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
Oof, that's another difficult one. I have several that are favourites for different reasons.
Bordsteingespräche for the sheer joy and ease with which it was written.
Kaputt for how much of my heart and soul I'm putting into it.
Die Welt in unseren Händen, because after twenty years of trying and failing I am now finally writing an epic long-form multi-chapter fanfic and I have so many plans and ideas for it. I cannot put into words just how wild that is. And I simply adore this version of my favourite characters.
No-pressure tagging @carlomenzinger, @kathastrophen and @all-my-worlds-a-stage if you want to :)
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"Yeah, but you can't quit!"
"I got yelled at, got my ass kicked, and then gave him my money! You know who lives like that? Hookers."
"Yeah, but he's not that bad a guy! You gotta give him a chance. You don't know him like I do."
"...that's hooker talk."
***
Hey so remember when I said the winner of the GOAT Miguetri Moment poll would get a thing???
WELL I AM A WOMAN OF MY WORD DAMMIT
I realized I've never actually made these two a friendship moodboard and that!!! Will not stand, dammit!!!
Anyways their S1 dynamic was/is so important to me. Cute lil idealist Miguel truly believing Johnny Lawrence can solve all problems and cynical defeatist Demetri who has the only brain cell and is like "hey, this dude shat on my other best friend for something he can't help, embarrassed me for trying to defend him, AND I had to pay him??? At least I don't gotta cash out to Kyler." Dude's got a point, honestly. I'd get hazed out of Cobra Kai SO fast, and my parents would be like "thank god, those lessons were expensive" XD Demetri bby never let anyone shame you for making financially smart decisions that are also good for your mental health!!!
And the subtext of Demetri kinda trying to look out for Miguel and steer him away from idolizing this disaster man who peaked in high school??? Like I think I mentioned this on a previous post, but the way he tries to give Miguel the wake-up call Demetri thinks he needs and encourages him not to bend over backwards for people who (at least from what Demetri's seen!) don't treat him or people in general very well is kind of adorable. Like of course Demetri's being cheeky and smug and sarcastic about it, but he's basically saying that Miguel deserves better than Johnny and should respect/value himself a little more!
And Miguel, my beautiful hopeful babygirl Miguel Diaz <3 <3 <3 Like he believes in Demetri's potential long after Demetri's clearly given up on himself??? And tbh I've never read this scene as Miguel being annoyed Demetri trusts Miguel to protect him from bullies (like that's what you do for your friends lmao. And Miguel would in a heartbeat if he needed to because he's a loyal mf!!!). If anything, he seems worried about what Demetri's gonna do when he's not around and can't scare Kyler off and frustrated that Demetri's just dismissing his own potential that fast. Miguel clearly has 0 issue looking out for Demetri when the cards are down, considering how he talked to Johnny about Kreese punching him and readily sided with him after the Arm Break Incident.
Also something I've already mentioned in other posts, I'm sure, but the fact that a) Demetri completely trusts Miguel to protect him from bullies and implies he would do so with no hesitation and b) they're close enough friends after a few months max that they can comfortably walk with their arms brushing and casually give each other little affectionate platonic touches (most notably this little shoulder slap thing they do) is the cutest fucking thing on earth. This friendship is so slept on. Like every time I think about them I wanna cry because they're so fucking ride or die and they've easily had the most wholesome, loyal, and unproblematic friendship in the entire show and WHY aren't more people talking about them??? Any disagreements they have really ARE in the vein of "ugh you're so wrong never talk to me again for 10 minutes but then I have karate gossip I wanna tell you." I love them so much.
THEY ARE BESTIES YOUR HONOR
An argument could also be made that these two have a closer and healthier friendship than Miguel & Eli ever did and I ain't kicking that hornet's nest today but perhaps I will someday :3
"Wanna be my best friend and then judge me" also just. PERFECTLY captures their friendship XD SO much mutual judgment going on in this scene and I am LIVING for it.
Went for a red, blue, green, and white-ish color scheme for this to match their clothes and the bg! Hopefully it came out okay.
As always, pic credits available upon request!
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