#I wanted to scream out of happiness because it will be okay
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mywritersmind ¡ 2 days ago
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GETAWAY - FC43
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summary : An italian weekend getaway with your favorite loving boyfriend. Filled with strawberries and hammocks.
listen up : inspired by @purinfelix ! super sweet and blue vibes
word count : 884
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I yawn, walking down the kitchen and through the doorway that’s wide open, revealing my favorite part of this house. The balcony is long and filled with a couch, hammock, and table, all overlooking the crystal blue ocean. My feet are cold against the wooden floors but the moment I step outside, the sun warms my face.
I smile softly when I see him. He’s in a chair, quietly looking at the water. I wrap my arms around my lovely boyfriend, my coffee and strawberries in my hands still.
“Morning Mi amor.” His strong arms move so his hand is resting over mine, tilting his hair back so his waves brush the side of my face.
He gets a hold of my arm and gently pulls me around him, motioning to sit on his lap. He puts down his mate and welcomes me to sit on him. I put my breakfast down and wrap my arm around him, looking up into the fact I so love.
Franco’s hand goes to my leg, smiling. “Nice shirt.” I look down at what I'm wearing. It’s his shirt actually. A blue and white striped button down paired with underwear to match.
“Thank you!” I run my hands through his hair, messing it up at bit, “I stole it from a very handsome man!”
He tilts his head a bit, kissing my cheek, “He’s a lucky man.” I rest my head on Franco's shoulder. He smells like peppermint and coffee. He snatches one of my strawberries from my bowl and pops it into his mouth.
I breathe in the fresh air, closing my eyes and smiling. “You’re a vision, mi amor.” He kisses me on my lips this time, brushing my hair back softly.
I fell in love with him because of how soft he is. He never rushed me, never yelled. Him and those big brown eyes do everything to love me.
“What are you thinking about today?” I ask, looking out at the water and birds passing ahead as his lips go to my neck, “Farmers market?”
He hums against my skin, not giving any answer. I can’t even be mad at his lack of words because his lips against me and this morning view is anything I could ever ask for.
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Our day is slow and peaceful, his hand never leaves mine and as soon as we get back to the house we change. Franco will go along with anything I do and I may be abusing my power a bit when I see our matching pajamas.
I can’t help but giggle at Franco in the blue and white porcelain design, they’re locally made and absolutely gorgeous. I have the pants and top while he seemed far too happy that they had no other pajama top in his size.
It takes approximately twenty minutes for the two of us to get into the hammock without falling out. He wraps his arm around me as I nuzzle into his chest, looking up at the star filled sky.
“I never want to leave.” He says as jazz plays from his phone across the balcony, “Let’s stay.”
I smile and look up at him, “We have to leave. But we can come back anytime.” I kiss his jaw as his hand brushes up and down my arm.
“I love you.” It makes me smile.
“I love you too.” I wrap my arm around his middle, his shirt soft against my skin. I look back up at the stars, feeling complete peace in the cool air, my warm skin, and my boyfriend next to me.
“Those stars look like a dick.” And he ruins it all in one sentence. I groan and he starts laughing, hard, shaking the hammock.
“Franco!” I scream and hold onto him tighter as we swing, “Fran- I swear!”
He's still laughing, his chest moving up and down rapidly under my head. He holds me tighter as we both try to stay still, “I’m sorry!” He laughs, “I’m sorry! You love me! You can’t be mad!”
“You’re the wor-” I go to jokingly hit his arm but when he moves to block me, we flip.
We’re on the floor and laughing seconds later. Franco grabs my face, trying to be serious but still laughing, “Are you okay!?”
Literal tears are coming out of my eyes which he wipes away with his thumbs, still looking at me worriedly. I just laugh again and pull him closer to me, pressing my lips against mine.
He pushes his hand into my hair, “Did you hit your head?” I shake my head and kiss him again, climbing on top of him.
He laughs against my lips, moving his hands to the side of my legs. “Attempted murder!” He says as I gasp dramatically.
“You were the one who made us fall!”
“Oh no!” His hand goes to my head, “You did hit your head!” I hit his arm as he breaks into laughter again and I move back next to him, looking up at the stars from the floor.
He kisses my head and tugs me against him again, “Those stars look like a heart.”
I raise a brow, “No they don’t.”
He shushes me and points, “Just squint.”
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judesmoonbeauty ¡ 3 days ago
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𝕁𝕦𝕕𝕖 𝕁𝕒𝕫𝕫𝕒'𝕤 𝕄𝕒𝕚𝕟 𝕊𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪: 𝔼𝕡𝕚𝕤𝕠𝕕𝕖 𝟘
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This is a fan translation only. Please expect grammatical errors and translation inaccuracies. This is a full translation. Cybird owns everything. Re-blogs are appreciated, but please do not post my translation elsewhere. Thank you for your support! ☞.
CW: ☞. Violence ☞. Brief mentions of castration ☞. Habitual use of the phrase, "that/the woman." (Just in case some are sensitive to this phrasing).
Average daily life, time that flows peacefully, without a single blemish.
Something like that is as distant as the moon is from me.
Battered Man: Drop dead, Jude Jazza……!
Being attacked on the street in the middle of the night, is so damn common it’s no longer funny.
Before the knife could reach me, I kicked the man and broke his jaw…
Battered Man: Gah…..
As the man fell to the ground, blood gushed out from his nose and sprayed everywhere.
Jude: Ain’t no way I’m gonna be done in by some shitty, cowardly lil’ nobody like ya.
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Battered Man: My business is ruined because of YOU…..
Jude: On the surface, it looked like ya ran a respectable pharmaceutical company. But…..
Jude: Ya were sellin’ some pretty dangerous stuff behind closed doors.
Battered Man: W-well….thats….
Jude: Ha, mister yer face’s so pale, that its pitifulness’s undeniable proof.
Jude: Ellis.
Ellis: Should I have him castrated and thrown into the lab as well? [1]
[1] 去勢 Kyosei can mean castration/emasculation/enervation/taming. Ellis could saying: “Do you want me to subdue...." However, in this previous event, Jude has a bunch of guys castrated by a black market surgeon prior to being sent to work. So, I opted for castrating instead of subdued.
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Jude: If ya already know, then don’t ask.
Ellis: Okay, got it. If that’s what makes you happy Jude.
Battered Man: D-d-damn it…….ahhh!?
In a final attempt, the man raised his knife, but screams rang out when I stepped on his hand and broke it.
Jude: Oh, that’s feels good. All shitty people should be dropped in hell ‘n left to rot.
I left Ellis with the clean up and lit a cigarette.
The exhaled purple smoke rose into sky, coming into view of the full moon.
(….Ah, figured it was full moon ‘cause it’s so bright out.)
(Still, the moon’s so huge it’s gratin’. ….How annoyin’.)
I hate the moon.
It shines so irritatingly bright - it won’t let me forget the things I want to forget.
Even though I want to look away, instead I look up in disgust.
I exhaled more purple smoke, like it would expel these jagged feelings.
Then under the moonlight, I noticed a woman who was standing there just like me.
(Postwoman……?)
The woman looked up at the moon,
Postwoman: ….Okay, let’s give it our all tomorrow too.
Her lips etched into a soft smile, as if looking forward to tomorrow.
Then using the moonlight as her guide, she left the darkness of the back street.
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(Workin’ ‘til late hours, ‘n yet bein’ weirdly optimistic, she’s suspiciously good natured…...huh.)
I wonder when I started to feel irritated with soft, and pure things.
Was it when I realized they were the ideal prey for malice and murderous intent, and can be easily trampled on?
There’s so many things in this world you’re best not getting involved with, or coming to know about.
The woman who followed the moonlight vanished, and was no longer there.
Those who live can live a carefree life, should live a carefree life.
I had complete forgotten about that night.
Until, a woman wandered into the darkness —
William: Well, if it isn’t the little robin I met this afternoon!
Kate: I…What?
As she stood there covered in blood spatter, she seemed somewhat familiar.
(That postwoman…..?)
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The only thing I remember is her profile while looking up at the moon, but the more I look, the more my memories of that night pile up.
(What’s she doin’ here?)
From what was said, it seems that she was delivering mail when she carelessly wandered onto the scene.
(She ran into Crown by chance. How unlucky can she get?)
Harrison: What should we do, Will?
William: We should take her with us, of course — to the “Palace’s Reaper”.
Crown’s existence is a secret, and those who become aware of its existence are killed off.
Especially if you’ve witnessed an execution.
In other words, this woman can’t escape her death sentence.
Jude: Tch…..that’s why I toldja to lock the damn door!
The woman’s body trembled with anxiety as I clicked my tongue.
William: Come here, pitiful robin.
And thus, the woman was disposed of by Crown, the end.
— Apparently, it didn’t go that way.
At the whim of that shitty crackpot of a Queen’s aide, Victor, the woman called Kate was established as a “fairytale keeper.”
It was decided that she’d spend one month together with us.
(Whaddya mean, “fairytale keeper,” how stupid.)
It’s sounds good, but she was forced into a contract of being monitored while she worked.
(Ain’t right to bind someone to an agreement simply ‘cause they accidentally witnessed an murder.)
Jude: Tch….Revoltin’.
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Victor: Oh, don’t be like that Jude. You’ll have to look after her too.
Jude: Not a chance. What in the blazes ya thinkin', abusin' Her Majesty's power by kidnappin' this nobody?
As I glared at Victor, the gaze of the woman called Kate pierced me……
Kate: Thank you so much, Master Jude.
(Whatcha talkin’ to me so easily to for?)
Jude: Poor thing, gettin' kidnapped 'n forced to come here. Want me to rescue ya?
When I mockingly asked about the situation she couldn’t run from,
Kate: …Really? You’d do that?
The eyes of the woman in front of me, widened slightly with hope.
(What’s with those sparklin’ eyes?)
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Jude: Obviously, I’m jokin’! What the hell’d ya get ya hopes up for, ya dimwit?
The woman’s eyes darkened, as if her fragile hope had been shattered.
(Can’t leave this place for a month ‘n it’s all ‘cause ya agreed to it.)
— Everything here now, is nauseating.
Jude: We won't have a problem long as ya work hard. Yer only other option's to run 'n get killed, o'course.
I replied coldly, turned my back and took my leave.
(The hell’s with those guys, they’re all so shitty.)
(Why’m I so frustrated at how ridiculous it is?)
The moment I took out a cigarette to light it, to hide my frustration,
Jude: …….
I spotted the moon outside the window.
The moon was shining so irritatingly bright tonight as well……
(…Ah, that’s right.)
(That woman’s sparklin’ eyes)
???: Hey — promise me something. When you get rich, take me to the moon. [2]
[2] It is not clear if “???” is speaking in the same accent as Jude. Hence, I’ll leave this written as proper English until further clarified.
(Is similar to their eyes.) [3]
[3] No pronouns are being used. Simply あいつ “aitsu” - she/he/them. No doubt it’s intentional.
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Jude: ….Tch, so disgustin’.
Turning from the moon, I lit the cigarette.
There’s so many things in this world you’re best not getting involved with, or coming to know about.
And yet, the woman who used the moon as her guide, stumbled into darkness.
(If ya can live a carefree life, then ya should live a carefree life.)
(That’s why)
Jude: ……Get outta here quick, princess.
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[Main Story Master List] Dividers: @.natimiles Tags list: @sh0jun @theimaginativelyreticent @sapphire-323 @velisle @nateko @greatwitchsongsinger @cosmowgyrall. @lunaaka
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jasvtsc ¡ 2 days ago
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demon!dean x angel!reader.
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tw! mentions of death, anxiety, blood, graphic language, manipulation, dean being an a-hole, corruption, grammar mistakes (ig)
word count! 2.1k
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it was hard seeing dean in this state.
at first, you thought he was dead. you watched him die in your arms. then, you found out that he was a demon? and to make everything worse, no one wanted to tell you anything — they thought it was for the best.
why? you had no clue.
so, when they brought him in, back to the bunker, you almost got a heart attack. you wanted to scream, cry, throw up and do everything else that humans do when they’re overstimulated with emotions. however, your state of distressed euphoria didn’t last for long when the bad news came crashing down on you, making you hyperventilate and experience what was called a panic attack. while you were getting more human, your beloved was turning into his worst nightmare.
dean was a demon.
yeah, he indeed died a year prior, but because he was bearing the Mark Of Cain at that time, he was resurrected. and you weren’t exactly sure if you were happy about that.
sure, it was dean. he looked the same.
but it wasn’t your dean.
those green eyes, once full of love and adoration for you, now were as empty as the hole in your heart that his death left. whenever you looked at him, you didn’t see him — the soul once shattered but put back together by you. now, it was only darkness which consumed every tiny bit of light you tried so hard to put in him.
it wasn’t your dean.
you were sitting in the war room in your usual place — an armchair in the corner, right next to the cabinet stuffed with lore books and other things. nervously picking at your wings, you let the feathers drop to the ground as you stared with empty eyes at the wall in front of you. castiel and sam were discussing what to do with dean and how could they possibly save him — if the whole process was even reversible.
you had no idea how they managed to catch him in the first place and drag him back here — no one was telling you anything. you were as clueless as you could be, knowing only that the man you loved the most was now the creature of darkness you were taught to despise since the early stage of creation.
you didn’t get a chance to talk to him yet. and you weren’t exactly sure if you wanted to. you only saw how they dragged his unconscious body to the basement and locked him up in there, chained to the chair in the middle of the anti-possession symbol.
as more and more feathers covered the wooden floor, the man and your angel brother noticed the state you were in. they looked at each other and then back at you. sam sighed and came closer, placing his hand on your shoulder. you shivered lightly and looked at the younger winchester.
“hey, listen, we think that we found something which can help bring dean back. but we can’t leave him alone here so—“ sam explained with a soft smile, and you could see that when he turned his head towards cas, he wanted him to continue. the angel widened his eyes and nodded.
“oh, yeah. we want you to stay with him,” as always, painfully straightforward.
“why me? can’t one of you stay?” because frankly, you didn’t want to face him. not yet.
“birdie, you’re—“ sam started, but you quickly cut him off.
“don’t call me that,” you said with a stern voice, your tone almost threatening. it was what dean used to call you. no way you’d let this word slip from someone else’s mouth — it was reserved only for dean winchester.
“okay, fine, i won’t,” he raised his hands in surrender, taking a step back as he felt like you were about to hit him with something. “it’s just… you’re in no shape to go outside at the moment. look what you’ve done to your wings—“
“what i do with them is my fucking business,” you hissed, and both of them were stunned. you just cursed.
they were looking at you in disbelief, and suddenly, you felt embarrassed with your little outburst. however, you weren’t going to apologize for your feelings — you had an absolute right to be upset and frustrated. so, shooting them both a cold glare, you left the room.
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in the end, you were left alone with dean. it took you some time to mentally prepare for the confrontation. but eventually, you pulled your shit together and decided to go down to the basement.
carrying a tray with some food, you slowly opened the door and peeked inside. suddenly, you felt as if your heart was about to burst out of your chest, and your mouth was dry as if you hadn’t seen a drop of water in days. you slowly walked out into the dim light, showing yourself to him after god knows how long.
and then, you heard it — a mocking, cold-hearted chuckle that echoed through the air.
“oh, now, who do we have here? my little birdie. i missed you so much, baby. did you miss me, too?” he asked with a cruel smirk, tilting his head to the side as he sized you up, his eyes flashing a pitch-black colour for a second.
for some reason, all the courage you built up in yourself vanished as soon as you made eye contact with him. he was scary. you never thought you’d admit it, but you were genuinely scared of the man who once used to hold you so dearly in his arms, stroking your hair and whispering sweet nothings into your ear as he placed small kisses on your temple. now, he had this darkness in his soul that made you want to hurl — your angelic nature physically declining being anywhere near such evil.
you tightened your fingers on the tray, looking around the room, thinking what you should do. you couldn’t free him from his restraints, but then again, he had to eat, somehow. because still, you cared about him. fuck, you still loved him.
“come on, birdie. you’re not even going to say hi to me? please, let me have a look at your pretty face. it’s been so long,” he cooed, suddenly putting on that soft voice you were so used to hearing. but then again, you could just sense the mockery and the dark intention behind his words. everything coming out of his mouth in this moment was insincere.
but was that enough to make you weak? yes.
because, oh god, even if it was just for your delusions and how naive you were, you just wanted him back. you wanted your dean back, and you were ready to pretend as long as it was needed.
so, slowly, you looked up at him, trying to hold back your tears as they dwelled in your eyes, threatening to spill down your rosy cheeks.
dean smirked menacingly, running his tongue over the top row of his pearly white teeth, letting out a grunt as he bit his lower lip, slightly thrusting his hips forward and spreading his legs.
“there we go. my good little angel,” he taunted, eyeing you up and down with a predatory smile.
“what happened to you?” you asked meekly, your voice trembling as you swallowed a lump in your throat. you were sick to your stomach, and the smell of evil basically radiating from him didn’t help.
“me? nothing, birdie. it’s me, dean. your dean. your precious human, don’t you remember?” he tried acting clueless and innocent but quickly gave in to his demonic nature, letting out a cruel laugh as he threw his head back. “come on, don’t act so fucking dense. i’m a demon, now. you should’ve gathered that much by now. or did they not tell you? no wonder. you’re so fucking infantile that it’s just straight-up pathetic. you’re not a fucking kid. sure, you’re this cute, little, clueless angel. but come on, use your damn feathered brain sometimes,” he scoffed and rolled his eyes.
and holy shit, did that hurt.
you bit your lower lip, your eyes now obviously glossy when you let out a small sniffle. you just wanted to run and hide somewhere, away from him and his cruel insults. now, you were 100% sure.
it wasn’t your dean.
you were ready to leave the basement. you turned around and took a deep breath, but dean wouldn’t let you go so easily. as soon as he noticed that you wanted to escape, he used his soft voice. again.
“hey, hey, hey. birdie, i’m sorry. you know i didn’t mean that. it’s just—“ he grunted as if he was struggling. “it’s this demon in me. i can’t control it,” he started panting heavily, a smirk still on his face as you were turned with your back facing him. “birdie, please. you have to believe me. i would never hurt you.”
damn, did that work.
hearing him struggle and be in pain just cut at your heartstrings. quickly, you turned around with a panicked expression and stepped closer to him.
“dean?” you asked, your voice breaking as tears flooded your face, dropping from your chin onto his thighs. he nodded, putting on an act and using his most pathetic expression.
“it’s me, birdie. please, help me,” he almost choked on his words, his voice pained and hurting. “please, baby, you’re the only one i can count on.”
you knew you’d probably regret that later. but jesus, you were so gullible, and you loved him so much.
almost immediately, you freed him from his restraints, cupping his face and stroking his stubbled cheeks. he sighed and grabbed your wrists, giving them a gentle squeeze as he leaned into your touch. at this point, you were long gone.
“tell me what’s happening, dean. let me help you,” you whispered, carefully scanning his face, still clueless that all of it was just a scene.
“it hurts. baby, it hurts so badly,” he whimpered, squeezing your wrists tighter. hearing that only made you panic even more.
“where? tell me where, i’ll heal you,” you sobbed, your vision blurry because of your tears.
“you can’t. you can’t heal it,” he panted, closing his eyes shut and grunting in mock pain.
“what do you mean?” you widened your eyes. “why not?”
“there’s only one way you can help me,” and you were ready to do anything for him, your self-preservation instincts turned off instantly. with a nod, you encouraged him to continue. “birdie, i need your blood.”
and that was enough for you to freeze on the spot. your mouth went dry, and you exhaled a shaky breath. he needed your blood, which was probably the most sacred thing in the universe. angel blood was the rarest to get, and it had its power.
“h-how? why?” you stuttered, shaking your head as you tried to understand it. you didn’t know anything about angels helping someone with their blood. and you were scared of the possible consequences.
dean cursed in his head, trying his best not to frown and scoff. instead, he kept on with the pathetic act. he whimpered again and then grunted, leaning forward as he put his hand on his chest, pretending that he struggled to breathe.
“please. i- i can’t,” he groaned and then screamed in pain.
“okay, what do i do?” you asked, widening your eyes as even more panic flooding your system.
“feed it to me. please, birdie. let me drink your blood,” he begged and then, you acted purely on your feelings, throwing any remaining logical thought out the window.
without much further ado, you lifted one of your wings and took a single feather. you slit your wrist with the sharper end, and as the crimson liquid started dripping down your skin at high speed, you put it closer to his face.
dean closed his eyes and inhaled the metallic scent. it took him a lot of effort not to moan in pure pleasure and excitement. he licked his lips and then grabbed your hand, putting his mouth in your wrist and drinking your blood like a man starved. you gasped and scrunched your eyes, tilting your head away as he dug his teeth into your skin for a better grip.
you began to feel more and more lightheaded as he drank more and more of your blood. when you finally looked back at him, only then did you realize your mistake. his eyes were pitch black, and his mouth was covered in your blood. he pulled away and smiled sadistically, looking at you like a feral animal.
he pushed you onto the floor and chuckled darkly, looking around the room. he grabbed the feather you dropped and it practically rotted in his hand, turning into a dark blade-like object. you widened your eyes, crawling away from him as he started to walk towards you with a bloodthirsty smile. and then, only one word slipped from his blood-covered mouth.
“run.”
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a/n: idea inspired by @angelicjackles !! lmk what you think, all feedback is very much appreciated:))
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༄♡ tags: @internetitgirl17 @beausling @deanswidow @titsout4nicholas @deansbite @aileenunfiltered @a1ecmcdowell @angelicp0etry @figthoughts @fitxgrld @hrtsoldierboy @10ava01
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rothpie ¡ 16 hours ago
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❝FIDELITY❞ |part8
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MASTERLIST -`✮´- Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader x JJ Maybank
Summary: Kook!Reader’s world is upended by betrayal, and her only way forward might lie with the most unlikely person—JJ Maybank. But as they build a new life together, old flames and past mistakes refuse to stay buried.
Warnings: slut shaming(?)
previous - next
Could you really call yourself an adult now?
I mean, honestly, is there some magical age that makes you a certified grown-up?
If it’s all about age, then nope—you weren’t an adult. Maybe a “young adult” at best, but even then, the life you were living? Let’s just say it was… a bit different.
When everything started happening so quickly, keeping up felt impossible. And let’s face it, that was normal. If you managed to juggle everything with calm composure, you’d probably qualify as Wonder Woman. Life came with its ups and downs, but throw pregnancy symptoms into the mix, and things got extra tricky.
You liked to share what you wanted with others. Talking about your plans openly was just how you were. It wasn’t about bragging; you just enjoyed sharing your happiness. But every single time—without fail—whatever you talked about? It never happened.
That Venice trip you’d been set on for the summer? Canceled.
The dream university? Rejected. That car you were this close to buying? Nope, didn’t happen.
It was like clockwork. Every time.
And the thing was, you never learned. Not really. You’d repeat the same mistake again and again. Life’s law, right? Someday you’d figure it out… though that day clearly wasn’t anytime soon.
Pregnancy, though, wasn’t exactly something you could go shouting about to everyone. That was off the table. But moving?
If you weren’t pregnant, there’s no way you’d have kept quiet. You’d have made sure the entire island knew. And naturally, that would’ve meant it wouldn’t happen.
This time, though, you zipped it. The only person who knew was JJ—and, well, he didn’t really count. Or, okay, maybe he did. Of course, he was important, but not the kind of person to stand in your way. On the contrary, he had your back. He even offered to help you with the whole moving process.
Things happened so fast, you could hardly believe it.
Your dad came home from his work trip, you visited the mainland, met with a realtor friend of his, checked out potential homes—it was like someone had hit the fast-forward button.
You couldn’t decide on anything. You were even okay with a cute little apartment. The list of occupants was simple: you and your daughter. You didn’t need much more.
Your mom, however, had her opinions. She didn’t want a mansion either, but she was firm about the house having enough rooms. One for you, one for your daughter, and a guest room—because naturally, grandma duties. And a yard, because she wanted to watch her grandchild play outside.
So apartments were out. Houses it was. After seeing what felt like a million empty ones, you were ready to scream.
But finally, you found it. The perfect house. The yard alone sold it. You could already picture the memories you’d make there with your daughter. Maybe a swing or a hammock… some comfy furniture on the porch.
You never imagined you’d get so close to your dream so quickly.
It had the three rooms your mom insisted on, was two stories, and honestly, it was beautiful. You loved it. But the idea of living there alone was terrifying.
Still, the deal was sealed.
It didn’t take long—two weeks, tops. When your mom insisted on hiring an interior designer, you didn’t argue much. Secretly, you liked the idea. And once your belongings were packed, it was all done.
All that was left was you.
There weren’t many people to say goodbye to on the island, which was, honestly, fine. Who were you supposed to bid farewell to? Rafe? His family, who didn’t even know you were pregnant? Your friends, who’d probably broadcast the news to the world? No thanks.
Except for JJ.
You’d have been a total ass not to acknowledge his help. Even if his support wasn’t entirely physical, his presence had been a huge emotional lift.
So saying goodbye wasn’t hard.
Ignoring the support he’d given you would’ve been dumb. When you decided to give him a nice surfboard as a thank-you gift, you didn’t overthink it. You just thought about who JJ was—someone who loved the ocean and surfing. Beyond that? You didn’t know much. So you kept it simple. Spoiler alert: he liked it.
You hesitated, thinking a gift might make things unnecessarily sentimental, but he deserved it. Nobody else in his position would’ve treated you as kindly. Even Kooks barely treated each other well. Expecting a Pogue to go out of their way for you? Yeah, no.
But JJ had.
You weren’t super close, but during one of your conversations, he’d mentioned how much he liked the rare nights when his shift ended early. He worked at a pub. In your head, you’d given him two weeks before he got fired—or kicked out after starting a fight. You were that sure of it.
A week ago, knowing the end of his evening shift, you parked near the pub, sitting on your car hood to wait for him. The plan? Give him the surfboard. Maybe even give him a ride home if he needed one.
Fifteen minutes passed. He hadn’t come out.
You started questioning everything—maybe you’d gotten the wrong day? Or maybe you’d messed up the time?
Waiting around for nothing felt miserable. You should’ve paid better attention when he’d been talking about his schedule.
Not that the gift had been planned or anything. The idea had hit you on a whim. You just wanted to do something before you left. After all, there weren’t many people to say goodbye to. And texting JJ a quick see ya felt way too impersonal.
“What are you doing here?”
You snapped out of your thoughts, your eyes shooting up from your phone. JJ stood a few steps away, mid-turn before he stopped and faced you fully. His eyes scanned the car before landing on you.
Quickly, you shoved your phone into your pocket. “Making sure you didn’t pick another fight.” Sliding off the hood, you smirked.
JJ rolled his eyes, flashing you a sarcastic smile. “Ha-ha. How funny.”
Unlike him, your grin was genuine. Why should he have all the fun pissing people off? It was your turn.
Unlike him, your lips curled into a genuine smile. Was it always going to be him getting under your skin for his own amusement? No, this time, it was your turn.
You heard him say your name, his tone serious. “No, really. What are you doing here?”
Keeping surprises wasn’t exactly your specialty, but you couldn’t resist messing with him a little. After all, this was the first time in days you’d left the house—and only in your baggiest clothes. Might as well enjoy it.
“Just hanging out.”
He frowned, his eyes scanning the area before gesturing around. “Here? Outside the pub?”
The confusion on his face was nearly comical—borderline annoyed, maybe?
You mirrored his glance at the surroundings, raising your eyebrows. It wasn’t much to look at. Just… a place. “What’s wrong with here?”
JJ let out a frustrated sigh, and for a moment, you couldn’t believe you’d actually managed to annoy him. He genuinely looked upset. “Are you serious right now? You—” He stopped himself, clenching his jaw as he stepped closer. Lowering his voice, he added, “You can’t drink. You’re not even supposed to be hanging around.”
So, he thought you’d come here to drink? That’s why he was so worked up?
It was kind of… cute. But poking the bear was way more fun.
You let out a dramatic hum as you crossed your arms. “Not allowed? Says who?” You tried not to laugh at the look he shot you, a mix of exasperation and disbelief, like you’d lost your mind.
“Me. You’re not drinking. Not here, not anywhere. Have you lost it?”
Your lips pulled into a grin, and despite his attempt to scold you, his irritation only made it funnier. Especially since you hadn’t even done what he was accusing you of.
The second JJ caught onto what you were doing, his annoyed expression melted away. As your laughter echoed, he pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly unimpressed. “Yeah, yeah. Hilarious. Now, can you just tell me what you’re actually doing here?”
You clutched your stomach, your laughter dying down into a lingering smile. Sure, he wasn’t amused, but you were, and that’s all that mattered.
“I’ve got something for you.”
JJ’s eyebrows shot up. He straightened, intrigued. “Yeah?”
You stepped away from the car’s front, glancing back to see him still rooted in place. You gave him a quick head nod to follow. With a sigh, he finally moved. “If this is a gun for self-defense, just so you know, I’m not really clear on the rules here,” he joked with a wink.
You snorted, shaking your head. “Please. If I gave you a gun, you’d be arrested in, like, two seconds.”
He laughed, but you could tell he was curious now. Opening the back door, you reached inside. “It’s a thank-you gift. Kind of.”The surprise on his face was priceless. He clearly wasn’t expecting this. Honestly, neither were you until the idea struck.
JJ tilted his head, his expression skeptical. “Thank you? For what? For telling you not to pick fights?”
You rolled your eyes. He couldn’t be serious. “No, JJ. For helping me out.”
He smiled, but it was that classic, goofy grin of his. Any trace of his earlier irritation had completely vanished. He didn’t even glance into the car. “Oh, I get it. Like a ‘without JJ, my life would’ve fallen apart’ kind of thank you? Go on, feed my ego. I live for this.”
For a split second, you considered slamming the door and driving off. Instead, you laughed. Sure, there was some truth to what he said, but no way were you letting him win.
Taking a deep breath, you opened the door wider and stepped back. “Nope. It’s just a small gesture. Don’t read too much into it.”
JJ walked over and held the door open, his eyes going wide when he spotted the surfboard wedged into the backseat. His fingers ran over the smooth edges and the blue-and-white design. “You got this for me?” he asked, his voice softer now as he inspected it.
You couldn’t suppress your grin. “Yeah. I mean, I know it’s kind of random, but I figured you could use your own board for a change. For everything you’ve done—” You hesitated, trying to find the right words. “It meant a lot.”
JJ’s smile was different this time. It wasn’t cocky or teasing. It was genuine. “If I don’t take this, I feel like you’d be really annoying about it,” he muttered, pulling the board from the car.
“Absolutely. You wouldn’t want to hear me talk about how I poured my heart into its design,” you teased.
He froze, eyes narrowing. “Wait—you designed it?”
You smirked, holding his gaze. “No. But it’s nice that you believed it for a second.”
JJ laughed, shaking his head as he leaned the board against the car. For once, he wasn’t mocking or making jokes. Instead, he looked at you with something softer, something you couldn’t quite place. “This is… perfect. You didn’t have to do this.”
“I know. I just wanted to.”
He hesitated, glancing at the board before meeting your eyes again. “I was just trying to help. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”
And that was it, wasn’t it? That’s how it felt. Deep down, you’d even envied the way he was with his friends. He didn’t know you. In fact, he hated your group. But if he treated you like this—who knew how he treated his friends?
You weren’t used to people doing things for you without expecting something in return. Sure, you had a hunch JJ liked money. Not just you—everyone on the island knew that. But still, the way he talked to you, made time for you… it mattered. It broke the prejudice you had against him.
It wasn’t anything grand. He didn’t buy you houses or cars. He didn’t shower you with jewelry. But he talked to you like no one else did. He made you feel—like you were someone. Like someone whose decisions shouldn’t be dictated by anyone else’s words.
And that? That was worth more than jewelry. More than anything money could buy. It was something most people—Rafe included—didn’t have.
From the moment he heard, he didn’t tell anyone. What friend would do that? Ruthie? Sophie? Who?
JJ did.
And he wasn’t even your friend.
That’s why it mattered. He was just being himself, and you needed that.
“It felt like that.” JJ was holding the surfboard, his eyes catching yours. A strange silence fell between you. Neither of you had expected such a gesture—not just surfing, but the support he’d given you.
You hadn’t expected his support; that was his gesture to you. And he hadn’t expected a surfboard from you; that was your gesture to him.
JJ lifted the board to examine it, the usual smirk still on his face. He was clearly trying to ease the tension hanging between you. “So, I have my own board now, huh? I don’t have to give this one back, do I? Because when it comes to stuff like that, you’re pretty stubborn.”
“No, it’s yours,” you said, smiling. You were grateful for his teasing—it cut through the awkwardness. You could’ve stayed silent for hours. “But if I catch you getting into another fight, I’ll beat you with that board.”
JJ laughed, shaking his head. His gaze flicked between the board and you. He was ridiculously excited about the surfboard but trying hard not to show it. “Fair deal. But just so we’re clear, every cool move I pull off with this board? I’m crediting you. ‘Thanks to Princess for this wave,’ that kind of thing. You’re my sponsor now.”
You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t deny his antics made you laugh. He was fun to be around. You were glad the whole “status” nonsense between you two seemed to be fading. It wasn’t just you—he had his own assumptions about you too. But it felt like you’d both moved past that. “Okay. Sponsorship’s over. Go find your wave.”
JJ carefully propped the board against the wall, his expression softening. “Jokes aside, thanks. I mean it. This means a lot. Just don’t tell anyone I said that—gotta protect my image.” He smiled, dimples showing as he ran a hand through his hair.
You smiled back, nodding quickly. “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe.”
As you both grinned, JJ’s eyes flicked from you to the surfboard. Following his gaze, your eyes drifted to his hands, gently tracing the board like it was fragile.
“I’m leaving the island tomorrow.” The words tumbled out, and you saw his hands freeze. His gaze landed on you, but you kept your focus on the board, pretending to admire its design. It really was a beautiful surfboard. “So—I wanted to say thank you.”
His blue eyes pierced through you as if that was even possible. JJ didn’t say anything to make the moment heavier, just nodded. For several seconds, neither of you spoke. Realizing the air had gotten heavier, you shifted your tone to something more casual. “I could drive you home if you want.”
You weren’t the kind of person to offer, but making him carry a surfboard all the way home felt cruel.
JJ opened his mouth to respond, but a car horn blared from down the street. Both of you turned toward the sound. Outside the car, John B and Kiara were leaning against it, with Pope, Cleo, and Sarah visible through the windows. Pope waved at JJ from where he hung halfway out of the window.
When Sarah’s eyes met yours, you instinctively tugged at your shirt. There wasn’t anything visible, but still—you felt uneasy. “Wow,” you said, feigning amusement. “Your entourage is here.”
JJ hesitated, looking momentarily torn. Finally, he sighed, a guilty smile creeping onto his face. His gaze dropped to your hand still fidgeting with your shirt. For a split second, it seemed like he wanted to grab your hand, to stop you.
“Nothing’s showing,” he said, his eyes lingering on your waist. You knew that, but the idea of anyone finding out still terrified you. Especially someone from Rafe’s family. He didn’t want them to know, and neither did you. That’s why you felt the need to be extra cautious around Sarah and Wheezie.
“I know. It’s just—” You stopped, shutting your eyes briefly before opening them again. It was paranoia, but understandable. “Relax. No one knows, I swear.” His hand almost reached out to your arm, but he stopped, remembering his friends were watching from the car.
“Go,” you said, shrugging. You composed yourself. “Looks like you’ve got a ride after all.” You smiled.
JJ paused for a beat, then flashed a crooked smile. He hated the awkwardness lingering between you. “If this board isn’t as good as you said, you’re getting an earful. I’ll call you.” He walked backward, teasing. You couldn’t help but chuckle at his words.
As you walked toward your front door, you noticed his movements slow. He stopped, turned, and looked back at you. It was like he’d remembered something he’d forgotten to do. Placing the surfboard down gently, his eyes briefly darted away from yours.
Then he walked up to you and stopped right in front of you. After a brief, silent pause, you felt his arms wrap around you. Was he… hugging you? Seriously? The gesture caught both of you off guard. You’d never imagined this kind of closeness. But then again, you hadn’t imagined buying him a surfboard either. So, it didn’t feel wrong. If buying him a gift made you feel this close, then it wasn’t strange that he’d feel close enough to hug you.
You returned the gesture, wrapping your arms around him. His grip was firm, and the scent of salt and ocean filled your senses. How did he always smell so much like the sea?
The hug was short, but both of you felt the strangeness of it. Once again—you felt like you’d crossed a line. Broken some unspoken rule.
JJ shrugged as he pulled back. “Yeah, that’s it. See you, uh… whatever.”
You took a deep breath, watching him stand there. You hated goodbyes. You were going to miss this island, and now—
“Yeah… goodbye.” You pushed your hair behind your shoulders, trying to steady your voice. You didn’t understand why you felt like you were losing a friend. Like you were going to… miss him?
Stop. Don’t even think about it.
JJ nodded, picking up the surfboard as he walked toward the car. You watched him for a moment before turning to the front door and stepping into your car. Through the windshield, you caught a glimpse of Kiara muttering something to Sarah. Whatever she was saying, you couldn’t hear.
When JJ got into the car, he paused, lowering his head for a brief moment before looking outside again.
He mouthed something to the group. Not to you, but to the friends in the car. “Just shut up.”
When he gave you a quick nod, you returned it before starting your car. Watching them drive off, you felt a strange mix of relief and melancholy. You’d thanked JJ, and that was all you wanted. It was done.
Except for the quiet ache of losing a friend.
You’d left only a few clothes back at the house on the island. The furniture and everything else stayed in your room. Your parents insisted the room remain untouched—they wanted you to know there was still a home for you there. They even promised not to change a thing.
The first few months were bound to be hard; you knew that. Living alone was going to take some getting used to. But you hoped it’d all be worth it when you finally held your baby.
Now, you were sitting on the couch in your new place, sipping a green smoothie. You’d have given anything for a coffee, but pregnancy meant sacrifices. A little caffeine might not hurt, but you didn’t want to risk it. The smoothie was healthy, though it tasted awful.
It had only been six days since the move. You’d allowed yourself time to explore the area, taking walks around the quiet streets. Your parents had offered to stay with you for a few days, but you politely declined. You wanted to settle in on your own. Leaning on their warmth and presence only to have it ripped away later would have made the loneliness worse. You couldn’t let that happen.
Morning sickness had eased enough for a few walks, so you’d wandered the calm streets near your house. Quiet, orderly, nothing like Outer Banks. You couldn’t help but compare the two. Everything here was different. The people, the lifestyle—it all felt so structured and tame. But a part of you missed the chaos of the island. The freedom. The absurdity of going to the store in a bikini without anyone batting an eye. That tight-knit community where everyone knew each other’s names.
You’d visited the local park a few times. It was rarely crowded, and you hadn’t met anyone yet. By the time you arrived, most of the adults and kids were just beginning to trickle in.
So, here you were: your own place. Did that make you an adult?
How did adults even make friends? Scratch that—how did anyone past a certain age make friends? As a kid, it was easy. Just ask someone to play with you, and that was it. Middle school? Same thing.
But now? You didn’t know a soul here. What were you supposed to do? Walk up to someone and introduce yourself?
Terrifying thought.
Still, maybe worth trying, right?
-
Socializing wasn’t supposed to feel like this.
Your eyes scanned the park’s scenery. The leaves rustled gently in the breeze, and birds chirped in the branches above. A group of kids played in a sandbox, their laughter mingling with the faint sounds of distant traffic.
You clasped your hands over your stomach, exhaling deeply. “Maybe this is good for me,” you thought.
But the whole idea still felt horrifying. Sitting at home would’ve been worse, though. At least you were out, breathing fresh air.
Introducing yourself to someone, though? Out of the question. No anxiety attacks, but your chest tightened just thinking about it. No, you’d just sit and enjoy the park for a bit. That would be enough.
Your gaze dropped to the book in your lap: Healthy Nutrition and Development During Pregnancy. You fiddled with the corner of its cover. Would someone else find this funny? Carrying a guidebook instead of a novel wasn’t something even you would’ve expected a few months ago. But here you were, on the verge of a whole new chapter. Screw what anyone thought—you were preparing for your future.
Suddenly, the bench shifted slightly as someone sat down beside you. The movement snapped you out of your thoughts. You glanced up to find a middle-aged woman with an energetic demeanor. Her dyed-blond hair revealed a hint of gray at the roots, and a steaming coffee cup rested in her hands.
“Ugh, I hope I can finish this before it goes cold,” she muttered to herself before calling out to the playground. “Tati! No running, sweetheart!”
She waved toward the child before turning back to you with a wide smile.
“Lovely day, isn’t it?” she chirped.
You gave her a polite smile, nodding. “It is,” you replied, subtly shifting your book closer to your lap. Her eyes flicked to the book in your hands, narrowing slightly as if trying to make out the title. “Is that a… guidebook?” she finally asked.
You tilted your head slightly. “Yes,” you said simply, hoping that’d be enough to end the conversation.
“A pregnancy guide?” she pressed, her curiosity accompanied by a cheerful smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “How sweet! Helping out a sister or expecting a niece?—Oh, where are my manners? I’m Viola.”
Her question caught you off guard. You hesitated briefly before giving your name. “Uh, no. It’s for me,” you said with a small smile.
Her expression shifted instantly. Her eyes widened, her grin turning stiff and awkward. “For you? Oh…”
You nodded, feeling heat creep up your cheeks. She had seemed friendly at first, but the subtle judgment on her face now was impossible to ignore.
“How far along?” she asked, as if the question was perfectly natural.
“Sixteen weeks,” you mumbled, pretending to smooth the book’s pages. The weight of her gaze made your skin crawl.
“Ah, so young,” she murmured, taking a long sip from her coffee. When she lowered the cup, her eyes lingered on you, as though dissecting every detail. “How old are you, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“Twenty,” you replied, keeping your tone neutral but feeling the words land heavier than you intended. You watched her eyebrows knit together as she took a sharp breath.
“Twenty? You look barely old enough to drive!” she exclaimed, clearly not trying to be subtle. Then, almost conspiratorially, “But… you must be married, right?”
Your hands instinctively moved to rest on your stomach, but you hesitated to respond. The silence must have been answer enough because her eyes flicked from your belly back to your face.
“Oh,” she said knowingly, her smile tightening further. “So… is the father still in the picture?”
What was this, an interrogation?
You swallowed the lump forming in your throat. Was it the tone of her voice? Or the audacity of her questions? Whatever it was, it stung. “That’s not something I need to discuss with you,” you said firmly, fighting to keep the frustration out of your voice.
Viola shrugged, but her scrutinizing look didn’t waver. “Fair enough. But raising a baby at your age, and without… well, you know. It’s going to be tough. Don’t you think this was a bit… impulsive?”
Her words hit like a cold wind. You tightened your grip on your stomach and tilted your head slightly. “That’s none of your business,” you said, your voice harder now.
Viola didn’t back down. “Yes, maybe you’re right. But people talk, sweetheart. And usually, they judge the ones they think made the wrong decisions…” She paused, pursing her lips. “Well, they judge.”
That was all you needed to hear. You tucked your book under your arm like you were putting it in a bag, got up, and said, “I think it’s time for me to leave,” your tone colder than even you expected.
Viola raised a hand as if trying to smooth things over. “Oh, I didn’t mean to offend,” she said, but the look in her eyes betrayed the opposite. “I’m just saying this for your own good.”
You could shove your “thoughts” up your ass.
Turning on your heel, you walked toward the park’s exit. The sound of her coffee cup being placed on the bench and her murmuring words echoed behind you. A fresh start sounded nice, you thought. But a new beginning wasn’t a guarantee of escaping old judgments.
There was no way you were going out to socialize again anytime soon. You hated that woman. With every fiber of your being. The way she judged you with that smug little brain of hers—it made your blood boil. You had no memory of how you even made it back home.
You made yourself some hot cocoa, hoping it would calm your nerves. Honestly, lying flat in the grass wouldn’t have been enough to shake off the anger at this point.
Even though you tried to distract yourself—knowing full well that stress wasn’t good for the baby—it wasn’t working. The incident replayed in your mind on a loop. You were certain you’d shiver every time you walked past that park again.
Who did she think she was, anyway? How could someone pass judgment on a stranger like that? The sheer audacity—it was baffling.
The sound of your phone notification pulled you out of your spiraling thoughts. Glancing over, you reached for the phone resting on the couch.
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You waited for a reply, but when nothing came, you set the phone down again. At least one of you was having a good day. Even though you felt like you were on the verge of exploding, you took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.
The sudden ring of your phone startled you. You looked over, eyes narrowing slightly in surprise. JJ Maybank was calling you. Right now.
Pressing the phone to your ear, you grabbed the half-full cocoa mug from the table with your other hand. You weren’t going to drink it anymore. You were too annoyed to even think about washing it, but you figured you could at least move it somewhere out of sight. JJ’s voice came through the speaker, and despite everything, a small smile crept onto your face. For all his antics, he was a decent guy.
Heading toward the kitchen, you heard the cheerfulness in his voice as he began, “Used it this morning.” He was talking about the surfboard, excitement practically dripping from his words.
Frowning slightly, you placed the mug on the counter. This morning? Shouldn’t he have been at work? “This morning? Weren’t you supposed to be at work?”
There was a brief pause before JJ let out a muffled laugh. “Got fired,” he said casually, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Honestly, with him, it kind of was. You couldn’t help but laugh a little.
You weren’t surprised—of course, you weren’t. With the phone still pressed to your ear, you wandered over to the window and glanced outside. “Figured,” you said, your voice laced with playful sarcasm.
JJ didn’t miss a beat, his tone now teasingly accusatory. “Wait a second. Did you bet on me?”
Smiling, you shook your head even though he couldn’t see it, your attention momentarily caught by a cat wandering down the street. JJ cleared his throat, bringing you back. “No, but I wish I had,” you said.
His response came in the form of a dramatic groan. “That’s the meanest thing I’ve heard all week. You’re better than this.”
You turned around and walked toward the kitchen, your tone a little sharper now. “Get used to it.”
JJ responded immediately, his voice carrying a hint of challenge. “Never,” he shot back. Then, after a brief pause, his tone softened, but he added a teasing edge. “Pregnancy hormones have turned you into a completely different person. And it’s only been six days.”
The way he always knew how to push your buttons—and somehow make you smile instead of snap—was maddening. You found yourself tapping the corner of the table with your fingers, a habit you didn’t even notice until it happened. “I take pride in that,” you said, a playful grin tugging at your lips.
JJ came back stronger, more confident this time. “Hey, do you think it’s the hormones, or is it because you haven’t seen my handsome face for six whole days?” There was that familiar cocky tone, but you could tell he was trying to make you laugh. “I’d bet everything it’s because you haven’t seen my handsome face.”
“Even your surfboard?” you teased, your voice lifting just enough to show you were fully invested in the banter now. You moved toward the living room and dropped onto the couch, your gaze briefly flitting to the TV. But your attention was fully locked on JJ.
“Not a chance,” he replied instantly, almost defensive. “The board’s off-limits. Too precious.”
You chuckled, grabbing the nearby blanket and pulling it over your lap. “Then you’ve lost everything except the surfboard,” you said, shaking your head in mock disapproval. JJ’s laugh echoed through the phone, rich and warm, before he quipped, “You’ve been extra rude lately,” his voice carrying a mix of mock hurt and teasing amusement.
You didn’t just roll your eyes—you sank deeper into the couch, grabbing a pillow to prop yourself up. Of course, he’d called just to mess with you. Was he bored? Had he decided you were the best target for entertainment? “I’ve always been like this,” you replied with a shrug he couldn’t see.
“Nope,” JJ shot back instantly, his tone softer but still certain. A brief silence followed, filled only by the sound of your own breathing, before he spoke again. This time, his voice was a little more sincere. “So… how’s it going? Living alone and all?”
You didn’t hate that he asked. Actually, it felt nice to talk to someone. As an adult—or whatever weird in-between phase you were in—socializing wasn’t exactly easy. It hadn’t been easy on the island either, but at least that had been your choice. This wasn’t.
You took a deep breath, realizing the question was harder to answer than you’d expected. “It sucks,” you admitted finally, the honesty not surprising you in the slightest.
“Why?” JJ’s voice was softer now, laced with just enough concern to feel genuine but not suffocating. It was like he always knew how to navigate these moments without overstepping. And honestly, it was strange—good strange.
You tried to sort through the chaos in your head. “I don’t know,” you said with a faint sigh. “I haven’t really connected with anyone. I don’t know anyone here.”
JJ, ever the problem-solver in his own weird way, jumped in with his trademark ease. “Then make friends with the stray cats,” he said, that classic carefree tone of his bringing a smile to your face despite everything.
“I already have you,” you teased back, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “I couldn’t possibly betray you.”
His laugh from the other end of the line was contagious. “Not funny.” 
Fidgeting with the edge of the blanket, you hesitated before mumbling, “Are you okay? How are you?” Somehow, over the phone, it felt easier to ask—less intimidating than it would’ve been face-to-face.
“I’m amazing,” JJ said, his voice taking on a flat, almost robotic tone that screamed deflection.
“Your ego is exhausting,” you retorted, matching his sarcasm. Why couldn’t he just answer the question for once? Did everything have to be a game? “Seriously. How are you? After… you know, that day.”
JJ exhaled deeply, and when he finally spoke, his voice was quieter, almost reluctant. “I don’t live with my dad anymore.”
You sat up straighter, grabbing the remote to lower the TV’s volume. “Wait, really?”
“Yeah,” he said simply, like it wasn’t a big deal. “Packed up my stuff and left.”
It wasn’t exactly shocking. In fact, you were relieved he’d done it. Knowing he’d been living with someone who hurt him was unbearable. But still, you couldn’t stop your brow from furrowing. You couldn’t shake the worry. “Are you staying with John B?”
JJ’s silence was unexpected. You listened to the sound of his breathing, the faintest hitch before he finally answered. “Kind of?”
“What does that mean?” Your voice sharpened with concern. Why was he dancing around the answer when he could just tell you?
JJ sighed again, his tone shifting as though he’d stepped further away from the phone. “They don’t know I left yet. And I don’t want to talk about it.”
He hadn’t told his closest friends? Why? They weren’t the type to judge him. You didn’t know them well, but you were sure of that much. It didn’t make sense.
Even as your worry grew, you knew pressing him wasn’t the right move. “So where are you staying?” you asked cautiously.
JJ’s tone hardened. “I said I don’t want to talk about it.” There it was—his three-year-old tantrum mode. Did he really think people didn’t have the right to worry about him? Idiot.
You pinched the bridge of your nose, already feeling your patience wearing thin. “As your friend, I’m allowed to be concerned about your safety, JJ. Just tell me where you’re staying.”
His tone shifted again, this time lighter, more teasing. “Friend, huh? That’s nice. Kook and Pogue forever.”
“Shut it,” you snapped, your irritation clear. All you wanted was to know he was safe. “Just tell me already.”
JJ paused, then let out a soft laugh—the kind you knew was covering up something deeper. Even a toddler could tell. “I stayed with them for a few days. Been figuring it out since.”
You frowned. That wasn’t a solution. “You need to tell them,” you said gently.
He responded with the same stubbornness you’d come to expect, but his tone hinted at a smirk. “This is my problem, princess.” Then, as if to shift the mood, he added, “This is the first time we’ve talked on the phone. Cute, right? Now, tell me about your day.”
Despite the worry gnawing at you, you relaxed just a little. He wouldn’t be joking around like this if things were terrible… right?
You hoped so cause—JJ is your friend.
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orimuraa ¡ 2 days ago
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੭﹕ ̊ ̟ ꒷꒦ Cause I’d do anything to feel your touch - OT7
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꒰ 𝔖𝘺𝘯𝘰𝘱𝘴𝘪𝘴 ꒱┆pda with enhypen ⨾
۶ৎ ot7!enhypen x fem!reader ┆fluff┆headcanons┆kisses, tooth rotting affection┆ wc 824
⤷ 𝐲𝐞𝐣𝐢’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: this is probably my fav ot7 fic in a while that i wrote >.< it was so fun and so cute !! if you enjoyed, pls reblog and share some feedback <3 i really appreciate it ^^
꒰ঌ ℬℴℴ𝓀𝓈𝒽ℯ𝓁𝒻 ໒꒱
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𝑳𝒆𝒆 𝑯𝒆𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒏𝒈 - 이희승
okay..hear me out
hee LOVES showing you his affection
he doesn't care if you're in public or behind closed doors
he will kiss the heck out of you and always be cuddles up next to you
and if you don't reciprocate it back, he will cry (not literally but will give you the glossiest bambi eyes ever)
so do NOT reject his affection >:c
seungie would love to hold your hand in public because it comforts him <3
kisses on the forehead are his favorite >.<
pls love him ! he's just a baby who wants love and affection :(((
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑱𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒔𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒈 - 박종성
i feel like for jay, you would have to catch him on a good day to publicly show affection
he feels a wee bit shy and embarrassed when he in public so he saves his affection for a more reserved place
BUT he will not hesitate to hold your hand if you're feeling nervous in a crowd
jongie is such a gentleman like that
he'll keep his hand on your waist to make sure he doesn't lose you
"i got you princess"
ashbjw he's so precious
so basically, he's fine with small gestures in public but will turn as red as a tomato if you kiss him in public <3
𝑺𝒊𝒎 𝑱𝒂𝒆𝒚𝒖𝒏 - 심재윤
jakey's so childish that he will always make sure to let everyone know that you're his
hand holding, kisses, holding your waist, sitting you on his lap, etc.
he will do it all if it means that people know you're his
he will also purposely call you petnames super loudly so everyone hears
"baby!?!" "sweets?!?!" "princess!! you're here!!!"
his favorite thing to do in public tho if probably hand holding
jake loves to have you right next to him and it's a way for him to know that you're still right there
he will get super excited if you kiss him in public <3
essentially, he's just one big puppy who loves affection >o<
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒏 - ���성훈
shy boiii
he's not one to really show affection in public, but he will make sure to make up for it all when it's just you and him <3
his ears turn super pink if someone catches him showering you with affection
he has a certain demeanor for other people, but for you, he's such a softie
BUT what he does like is pinky holding :)
he doesn't necessarily need to always have your hand in his, but he does like keeping small contact with you
so, he loves interlocking your pinkies!
you and him will walk around with your pinkies interlocked and that's perfect for him
not too much and not too little <3
but behind doors, he's very clingy with you :3
𝑲𝒊𝒎 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒐𝒐 - 김선우
okay okay
i feel like sunoo would be the kind to be neutral
like, he doesn't care about being judged for showing you affection in the public
but he also doesn't like to go overboard cuz then it seems weird to him :/
he does like to link arms with you tho!
he thinks it keeps you guys together without getting separated in crowds very effectively
but he's definitely not the type to always be caught smooching you in public areas
he's happy keeping it minimal in public and then endless affection in more reserved places <33
𝒀𝒂𝒏𝒈 𝑱𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒘𝒐𝒏 - 양정원
hmm okay
so i think wonnie wouldn't feel embarrassed by pda, but he would also get flustered whenever you kiss him without warning
he likes holding your hand and planting kisses on your knuckles <3
and he will most definitely become more affectionate if he notices another guy checking you out
wonnie would also be super cuddly at home and stuff and he likes to follow you around everywhere
he seems like the type to lowkey just not give a care about the people around you when it comes to petnames tho
like, this man will be screaming
"JAGI!!!"
from like, 2 rooms across from you, making you instantly blush because of all the turned heads
but nonetheless, he's your wonnie who is extremely cuddly and affectionate
𝑵𝒊𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒖𝒓𝒂 𝑹𝒊𝒌𝒊 - 西村 力
we alllll know that riki likes to be perceived as "cool and mysterious"
but he's secretly just a baby who craves attention :((
like hoon, he would be a bit too shy to show any affection in public, but he does make sure you don't feel neglected
so he will steal a kiss whenever no one's around
and then if a person comes, he'll become super nonchalant abt it and continue his "mysterious" vibe
but when it's just you and him, he will pout for your affection if you don't give it to him ㅠㅠ
please make sure to give him many kisses >.<
as we've seen, he loves to have his hair played with
and i feel like that would be one of the very few things he would allow in public
like just waiting around in a restaurant or the subway, he would nudge you to play with his hair
he's really just a big baby who wants kisses :(((
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𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬: @en-diaries, @k-films, @k-nets
⚘. Perm taglist: @vmpivory, @yuvany, @seozii, @pinknjm, @greentulip, @jomisu, @nxzz-skz, @ancnymcnzjy
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nuria-schnee ¡ 14 hours ago
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Dead Boy Detectives - Fic Rec List (Part 1)
I've been wanting to do a rec list for a while, and now I have found a bit of time to do so. I've read A LOT of DBD fics in the past months, so I'm gonna split this rec list so this doesn't get insanely long. Also, check the tags of the fic because I'm just adding a few for length's sake.
Anyway, let's dive in! ❤️
Run your fingers through my soul by Hse11z5 (@thenyoumaykissthebride)
| T | 3k | Tags: Love Confessions, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Feelings Realization, Miscommunication, Idiots in Love, Fluff |
“Charles-” Edwin started, his voice catching over his friend’s name. “Just let me… Can I go first, please?” Charles begged, his hands still caught up with Edwin’s. Edwin nodded and swallowed the words he wanted to let escape. “Okay. Don’t be mad. But there’s no case.” Edwin scowled and opened his mouth. Charles winced. “I said don’t be mad! Now, I had to bring you here because there’s something really important I’ve been needing to tell you for a while now and it’s that-” Charles stopped. His hands fell to his side because he no longer had Edwin’s hands to hold. One second Edwin was there and then the next he just… wasn’t. Charles looked around madly, trying to work out what had happened, what kind of magic could have caused him to just disappear in a puff of smoke. That was when he saw the small orb bobbing behind the board games. aka The One Where Charles Fucks Up His Love Confession So Badly Edwin Orbs Out.
Notes: This was the cutest thing ever. I loved it so much, I swear.
and at once i knew i was not magnificent by aletterinthenameofsanity (@aletterinthenameofsanity)
| T | 3k | Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, First Kiss, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unreliable Narrator |
The problem with being Charles Rowland- or, rather, the truth of being Charles Rowland- is that he is not somebody that people kiss because they truly want to. Or rather, because they truly want him. When he was alive, it was because girls wanted the other guys on the team and he was a decent second option. It was because girls wanted to try out kissing and he did too and why not figure out their problems together? And now that he's dead, it's more of the same, isn't it? Crystal kisses him to try to feel something. And Edwin kisses him because their mouths are close together, and Edwin has just helped Charles through his crisis about his father and Brad and Hunter, and emotions are high, and, well- It makes sense that Edwin kisses Charles right now, doesn't it? It makes sense that Edwin is testing something out, and Charles is the person he trusts to test things out with. (Edwin kisses Charles at the end of Dead Dragons. Charles thinks that Edwin is doing it for practice. Edwin will just have to correct him, won't he?)
Notes: This broke my heart in a million pieces, but it was very worth it. This fic is absolutely brilliant.
the great snogging debacle of '95 by thatgayprince (@prince-simon)
| M | 26k | Tags: First Kiss, Feelings Realization, Getting Together, Disguise, Gender Fuckery, Near Sex Experience, Charles Rowland Has ADHD (DCU), Bisexual Charles Rowland (DCU), Internalized Homophobia, Canon Compliant, Pre-Canon, Post-Canon, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Past Child Abuse |
London, 1995 – Charles Rowland gets ambushed at a house party. He doesn’t think about it for the next 30 years.
Notes: Look, I'll be forever screaming about this one. It was amazing from the first word to the last. I think it rewired my brain, because I couldn't stop thinking about it afterwards.
i’ll be waiting for twenty years (praying for redemption) by aletterinthenameofsanity (@aletterinthenameofsanity)
| E | 4k | Tags: Heavy Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pre-Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Canon, First Kiss, First Time, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Religious Imagery & Symbolism |
The kindest thing that anyone has ever done for Charles was guide him to death. The cruelest thing that anyone has ever done is tell Charles that they would rather Charles have left with Death in that attic than stuck around. Charles has spent the last thirty years being haunted by the same ghost, of course. What an irony that Charles only started being haunted after he died. (What an irony that Charles only realized he was in love after that same ghost proved that Charles still had a heart in his dead chest, because that heart had broken the moment that Edwin had turned on his heel and left a shattered Charles in the place they once called a home.) And yet, Charles cannot stop wishing for Edwin to just turn around. For Edwin to just turn around and smile and laugh as he did in that attic. For Edwin to smile at him, for Edwin to accept him back, for Edwin to love him. (Edwin and Charles go their separate ways in 1990 and spend the next thirty years pining for each other. Don't worry, they'll figure things out eventually.)
Notes: The way this broke my heart and put it back together, I swear- Absolutely amazing. It's angsty and it hurts, but I have no regrets. I wanted to give it a thousand kudos (please, AO3, let me).
so I try to talk refined by shadowquill17 (@shadowquill17)
| E | 6k | Tags: POV Charles Rowland (DCU), Self-Esteem Issues, Internalized racism, Jealousy, Oblivious Charles Rowland (DCU), Misunderstandings |
Edwin tells Charles about the Cat King taking his appearance and Charles, after he's done being angry, thinks about it some more and comes to the conclusion that the only reason that could happen and Edwin could still be more flustered by the Cat King when he didn't look like Charles... is that Edwin doesn't find Charles attractive. He has no idea why it feels so painful.
Notes: This made me feel INSANE in the best of ways. I re-read it often and enjoy it as much as the first time. Thank you, @shadowquill17, for this amazing fic.
That Story Ends Tragically by Alexander_Writes (@neitherthehoneynorthebee)
| M | 12k | Tags: Ep 7 canon divergence, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Pre-Canon Scenes, Violence, Internalized Homophobia, Trauma, Love Confessions, First Kiss |
"Can you explain this?" Charles begged. "Charles, don't leave," said the boy behind them. Edwin glared, but forcefully smoothed his expression when he looked back at Charles. "Hell is ... perceptive. It likes to snare souls. What is ..." He swallowed, throat moving with it. "What is the thing that you are most scared of, right now?" "Losing you." Or, what if Charles got lost trying to find Edwin in Hell?
Notes: MY GOD THE BRILLIANCE OF THIS. This was so well written it had me on the edge of my seat from start to end. The angst and the resolution of it were incredible.
Turnabout's Fair Play by LikeMmmCookies (@likemmmcookies)
| E | 7k | Tags: Edwin learns to flirt, Charles is down so bad, Edwin wears SHORTS, Charles walks into a door about it, Cute and silly, Cheesy flirting |
Edwin learns how to flirt.
Notes: This one had me giggling and kicking my feet because it was so amazing. It was such a fun and sweet read that I just had to include it in this list.
A gentleman by Superfriki
| Not Rated | 2k | Tags: First Kiss, Getting Together, Courting Rituals, Fluff, Love Confessions, Charles being a simp, Niko and Charles being friends |
“Niko, I can’t walk into the office with a flower bouquet and ask Edwin to let me court him. He would shit himself and run the other way” He looked at the girl, worry etched into his brow. “Don’t worry, you can do some things before that. Maybe you could start by getting him a gift or being a gentleman with him” “Oi! I’m always a gentleman with him” - Or Charles tries to woo Edwin in the Edwardian way.
Notes: ABSOLUTE FLUFF. The love. The courting. Everything about is a 10/10.
The Case of Richard Rowland by RB (BlueflowersandWings) (@writerofstuff)
| M | 31k | Tags: Post-Canon, Case Fic, Abusive Parents, Past Child Abuse, Childhood Trauma, Recovery, Hurt/Comfort, Homophobia, Angst with a Happy Ending, Developing Relationship, Getting Together, Romantic Tension, Mutual Pining |
"Right on time, Charles," Edwin calls as he phases in through their office door. "It seems that we have a new client. We were just about to—" Charles freezes. "As I was saying," Charles' father coughs, sat across from Edwin with his back to the door, "my name is Richard Rowland, and I believe I have been murdered." — Or: Charles' father dies on a Sunday. On Monday, he arrives at the doorstep of the Dead Boy Detective Agency.
Notes: One of my all-time faves, honestly. This one hit me in the feelings with such force and shook me so fundamentally I had to stare at the wall for a bit after reading some scenes. It's angsty, but it's brilliantly written. Thank you @writerofstuff for this masterpiece.
a part of me that will never be mine by tragedy_machine (@tragedy-machine)
| E | 22k | Tags: Mutual Pining, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Unreliable Narrator, Oblivious Edwin Paine, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, First Kiss, First Time, Love Confessions |
Edwin tells Charles he loves him in Hell, but when Charles quickly responds with his own breathless 'I love you', Edwin assumes his friend meant it platonically, so he gives up halfway through his confession, leaving out the crucial 'I'm in love with you' part. Dejected, he decides to keep his feelings a secret. Meanwhile, Charles has been in love with his best mate for years, so when they unexpectedly exchange 'I love yous' on the staircase of Hell, Charles happily assumes that they've just started dating and are just going at a really slow pace. Needless to say, they're not really on the same page. --- OR: because of a misunderstanding during the confession in Hell, Charles thinks they're dating now, while Edwin believes his love will stay unrequited forever
Notes: This fic has my whole heart, I swear. It's one of my faves ever, and the sensation of receiving the email when it was updated was unparalleled. A true jewel. Thank you @tragedy-machine
pinch me (I don't want this to be a dream) by shadowquill17 (@shadowquill17)
| E | 15k | Tags: Accidental Mind Reading, Light Angst, Oblivious Charles Rowland (DCU), Misunderstandings, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Getting Together|
Charles has never met a magical object he didn’t want to use. He might have gotten cursed a couple times over the years, but he also found some great stuff that way, and it keeps his afterlife exciting, you know? So when he and Edwin find something called “Desire’s Pince-Nez”, spelled glasses that make you see someone’s desires if you look into their eyes, Charles doesn’t really think twice before trying them on.
Notes: This one killed me and revived me with every line. I cannot express properly how much I loved it, but it's one of the fics I re-read most often, so I guess that says something. Seriously, it's amazing,.
80 notes ¡ View notes
straylightdream ¡ 19 hours ago
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getaway car
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𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭: hansol vernon chwe x f.reader
↳ The ties were black, the lies were white. In shades of gray in candlelight. I wanted to leave him. I needed a reason.
𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: soulmate au??, neighbors to lovers, non idol au
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3.6k
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: mc boyfriend is a jerk, the mc ex is physically cheating, mc is emotional cheating, lots of emotions, smut warning below the cut
𝐚𝐧: my next story for SVT inspired by reputation songs by taylor swift. This is part of a loosely connecting series called “all for you” you can absolutely just read this as one shot. Thank you @whimsical-whatever for helping me figure out this story and listening to me ramble about it.
𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬!
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𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: oral (fem rec), fingering, protected sex, starting to have sex in the shower, multiple positions, this is very fluffy vanilla smut, lots of emotions
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When people talk about being in love they always make it sound so grand and wonderful. They don’t talk about the heartbreak that can also be experienced loving someone who doesn’t deserve your love.
Laying in bed you stare at the empty spot that should be occupied by your boyfriend of five years, but instead he’s nowhere to be seen.
In the last seven months things have fallen apart. No matter how hard you think back you don’t think you can pin the moment when it all started. You’re not happy anymore by any means. You’re not even sure you’re still in love.
There’s only one gleam of light in your life. The boy who lives down the hall Vernon. Whenever you see him he instantly brightens your day. You had met when you moved in, but you didn’t really talk until one day he rode in the elevator with you while you were crying. Since that day Vernon has been a fixture in your life. He became a shoulder to cry on when your boyfriend hurt your feelings. He was also someone you could talk to when you wanted to pretend everything was okay.
You tried your hardest to not complain about your relationship all the time. Most of the time you would just say you were sad and needed a friend.
This last week has been bad. It’s quite obvious your boyfriend is cheating on you.
From the moment you met Vernon you felt drawn to him. At first you told yourself it wasn't a romantic feeling but the longer you knew him the more you realized you felt like you need him in your life to exist. You told yourself over and over you were faithful to your boyfriend that this was nothing more than a crush. But the more your relationship starts to crumble the more you let yourself realize you have feelings for the boy down the hall.
It’s another night of fighting with your boyfriend. He’s come home from work way later than he should have. He walks in after midnight and you instantly spot the stain of lipstick on his shirt collar. There is a stabbing feeling in your chest. No matter how hard you loved him he was never going to be faithful to you.
You’ve pointed out to him a handful of times that things he does makes you think he could be cheating, but this is the first time you have called him a cheater. You would think that maybe he would defend himself and tell you that he’s not cheating, but he doesn’t do that. He tells you he cheats because of you. He points all the blame on you.
You scream at him, you're done and it’s over. You feel utterly broken. Sobbing that he broke your heart as he storms out of the apartment saying he needs air.
You sit on the couch trying to gather yourself. Giving yourself a moment before you pick up your phone and rush out of your apartment.
Walking down the hall there is only one person you wanna see. It’s way past one in the morning now. Opening your phone you hit Vernon contact. Holding your phone to your ear it rings about five times before he answers the phone.
“Is everything okay?” It’s rare you call him let alone in the middle of the night.
“Not really. I’m outside, can you let me in,” you start to cry again.
“Yeah.”
Moments later he opens the door quickly. He’s just in a pair of boxer briefs. He must have been in bed already.
“I’m sorry,” you say as tears slide down your cheek.
He doesn’t say anything. He takes your hand leading you into his apartment he shares with Chan and Seokmin.
He shut the door, locking it. He hesitates for a moment before he rests his hand on your cheek and gently wipes away your tears.
“I told him I’m done. He came home after midnight with lipstick stained on his collar. I don’t wanna do this anymore. He doesn’t love me and I can’t love him anymore. I don't love him anymore.” You lean into his touch.
“I’m glad you left him. He doesn’t deserve you.”
“I’m sorry,” you whisper. You’re sorry for so many things. You know he cares for you and that he probably has always romantically liked you for a while just like you have. And no matter what you do you hurt him in one way or another.
“Stop saying that. You have nothing to apologize to me for.” He gives you a gentle smile.
“Can we go to your room? I don’t want to bother the boys. It’s already so late and I already woke you up.”
Reaching down he takes your hand in his for the first time and leads you to his room. He shuts the door and releases your hand. “Would you mind if I stayed with you tonight?”
“Of course you can stay here.” You’ve never been so happy you stormed out of the house in your pajamas. “Did you want me to take the couch?”
“No, I was hoping I could sleep in your bed with you. I just really want to hold your hand.”
He can’t help the smile that tugs on his lips. You crawl under the covers and watch as Vernon turns the light on and crawls into bed next to you. You both lay there facing each other. There is a gap between you. Laying your hand there you want to be close to him. You want him to hold you and to kiss you and tell you you’ll be okay. But that is too much to ask of him.
There is always something about Vernon that he’s always been able to read you. He must notice you’re struggling. He reaches out, taking your hand in his.
“I don’t want to go back to my apartment. I don’t want to live in a building that is haunted with memories of him and I.”
He takes a deep breath squeezing your hand. “You don’t have to. I’ll help you pack your things when he’s gone to work.”
“Where am I supposed to go?” You can’t help the tears that are slowly falling.
“You can stay here with me as long as you need.”
“The boys won’t like that.” You can’t imagine either of the boys would be a fan of another person living in their three bedroom one bath apartment.
“They won’t care. Seokmin is back with his ex and barely lives here and Chan loves you. He won’t mind having you around.”
“Okay, I might need to stay here for a while. My lease wasn’t up for like six more months. Maybe I can find somewhere new by then.” Maybe Vernon has a friend who needs a new roommate.
“You don’t have to worry about that right now.” He wants to pull you close to his body and hold you like he has desperately wanted to.
There is a long moment of silence between you. “I didn't tell him I wasn’t coming home tonight. I just left after I told him we’re done.”
“That’s okay.”
“Thank you.” You’re trying to stop your tears.
“You don’t have to thank me,” he gives you a sleepy smile.
It doesn’t take long before you fall asleep with your head on his chest. His hand gently rubs your side soothing you to sleep. When you dream that night you dream about Vernon the boy who saved you. You dream about him finally kissing you the way you desperately want.
-
The next day you call out of work and send your now ex boyfriend a text telling him that it’s truly over. He’s luckily at work and away from the apartment. When he finally returned to your shared apartment last night he sent you seven texts trying to get a hold of you in the middle of last night.
You expect to receive an angry text responding to you telling him you want to break up but he leaves you on read. It’s probably for the best he does. You don’t think you could take arguing with him.
While he’s at work Vernon and Seokmin come help you pack up everything they possibly can. Seungcheol even brings his truck over to take some of your bigger stuff to a storage unit he has. You could cry at how kind Vernon and his friends are being to you. By the time five o'clock comes around basically anything that ever meant anything to you is long gone from your apartment. Seokmin and Seungcheol left you alone while you wrote a goodbye to your ex telling him he wouldn’t be hearing from you and that you would send him one more month worth of rent and that would be it.
Locking the door to your now former apartment stung. Tears brim your eyes thinking about how much you truly loved this apartment. Vernon takes your hand and brings it to his lips where he places a gentle kiss on top.
Moving on wasn’t going to be easy. You know that even though you have fallen out of love. This breakup is going to hurt. At least you now have Vernon there by your side. How much you desperately wanted to be with him, you wanted to heal and you didn’t want him to feel like he’s just a rebound.
Laying in bed that night, your head once again rests on his chest as he holds you close. “I wanna be with you fully,” you whisper.
“That’s good because I wanna be with you.” He’s slowly drawing circles on your arm.
“I don’t want to jump right into this. I think I need some time before we fully try this. But I’m begging you to be patient with me.”
Gently he presses his lips to the top of your head. “I will wait as long as it takes. I’m just asking that I can still hold your hand and hold you while we sleep. I don’t want to push you into anything else while you heal.”
After that night things stayed like this with Vernon for a while. You lived in his home and shared a bed with him for over a month and half. Vernon was truly your person. He was your rock and you have fallen for him even more.
-
Today has been hell. Anything that can go wrong is. You got yelled at at work, your ex has been trying to contact you all day and on top of that. The icing on the cake is getting stuck in a rain storm without a jacket or umbrella after getting dinner. Luckily Vernon is with you so you aren’t alone getting stuck in a rainstorm. After finding out about your terrible day at work Vernon took you out for dinner to cheer you up. Neither of you had any idea a rainstorm was coming. You had walked from the apartment about a mile to a cafe for dinner, but the rain was making it where you needed to get a cab home.
Running from the cab to the apartment building you can feel the water soaking through your clothes.
Opening the door to Vernon apartment you both instantly notice how quiet the apartment is.
“Chan is at work and I think Seokmin is with his girl. They’re fully back together now,” Vernon says. You’ve only met Seokmin ex a couple times when she came over to see him. She’s a sweet girl and seems like a good fit for him.
“Oh. I think I need a shower to warm up.” You pause staring at him for a moment. “Did you want to join?” You know this means things between you will change. But you desperately want more with him. It’s been a month and half of you living here sharing lingering touches, longing stares, and cuddling at night. You aren’t sure how much longer you could share a bed with him before you lose your mind.
“Are you sure?” He says staring at you with almost a concerned look on his face.
“Yes.”
Walking away from him you head off to the shower that is next door to his room. Luckily the boys aren’t home so you don’t have to worry about them interrupting you. You turn on the hot water waiting for him to walk in. Walking into the bathroom he locks the door as you strip away your clothes. He stands there like a statue as you open the sliding glass door and step into the steam. Your body feels an instant relief as the hot water hits your cold skin.
Standing under the warm water you watch Vernon through the frosted glass. You should feel embarrassed about him seeing you naked but you aren’t at all. This feels natural. You want whatever is going to happen with Vernon to happen. You don’t want to feel guilty for having a crush on him. He’s truly the reason you were able to walk away from your loveless relationship.
“Vernon?”
“Yes?”
“Are you going to join me?” You step back under the warm water.
Through the frosted glass you can see him pulling off his shirt. “Do you want me to join you?”
“I want you to.”
He doesn’t say anything, he just takes off his pants and boxers. The glass door slides open and there he is naked in all his glory. You don’t know the last time you saw a man naked other than your ex. Vernon is absolutely beautiful. You hope in the future you can kiss your way across his beautiful skin.
The moment he slides the door shut it doesn’t turn into some lust filled moment. He stares at you for a long moment. A gentle smile on his face.
“Can you come closer to me?” You hold your hand out. Silently he takes your hand stepping closer. The warm water is washing over both of you.
“Thank you,” you don’t think you can ever thank him enough for giving you a reason to leave.
“Don’t have to thank me.”
Reaching up, his hand rests on your cheek, “I feel like you’re supposed to be in my life.”
“I feel like I need you in my life. I feel things for you I never felt for him in those five long years.” He leans down and rest his forehead against yours.
“You know Wonwoo and his girlfriend?”
“You mean the boy who is absolutely in love?” You’ve met all of Vernon’s friend in the last month and half and the moment you met Wonwoo and his girlfriend you realized he was head over heels for his girlfriend. She had told you one night when you were all at Seungcheol and Joshua’s house that Wonwoo made her believe in soulmates. Hearing her say that made you question if soulmates are real. Because if they were, you think you found yours.
“They always say they’re each other's soulmates, and I think you’re mine if they’re real,” he pulls away from you slowly.
Your body feels fuzzy as you process his words. You can’t think straight as you close the small distance between you and crash your lips into his for your first kiss. Your fingers tangled in his hair pulling his body closer to yours. You can feel him hardening against your stomach as you deepen the kiss.
“Maybe we shouldn’t do this in the shower,” he whispers against your lips.
“Vernon?”
“Yes?”
“I want you in every way imaginable.”
Pulling away from you he turns off the water and steps out of the shower. He hands you a towel and starts working quickly drying himself off. The moment you’re both dry and wrapped in towels, you take his hand leading him towards his room.
Laying on his bed with your legs spread wide he’s kissing his way across your delicate skin. He kisses down your mound before pressing a kiss to your sensitive clit. His fingers part your folds as he licks your sensitive bundle of nerves. Slowly he pumps one finger inside. Your soft moans echo throughout his bedroom. He adds another finger earning a moan. Your finger clutch the sheets below you as he pushes you closer and closer to the edge.
Looking down at him you find him staring up at you through hooded eyes. He watches as you fall apart moaning his name.
Pulling away slowly he dips his fingers into his mouth wiping away your release. You stumble to sit up wanting to return the favor.
“What are you doing?” He asked, crawling off the bed.
“I was going to give you head in return,” you cock your head to the side.
“How much I would love that, I can’t think about anything other than being inside you,” he sighs.
“Oh-“
He reaches into his nightstand pulling out a foil packet. Tearing it open with his teeth. With lust filled eyes you watch as he rolls it down his hardened length.
Laying back on the bed you spread your legs waiting for him patiently.
Hovering over you he’s staring at you like you are the only person in the whole world. Reaching up, you rest your hand on his cheek.
“Do I sound like I’m crazy if I tell you I love you?” He whispers.
“No not at all,” you thought being in love again would be scary, but you think you have always been in love with him since you met him. He came into your life at the perfect time. You met him as you started to fall out of love with your ex. The moment you met Vernon in the hallway with your hands full of groceries you instantly felt something for him. Being around him made you feel like he’s supposed to be in your life.
“I love you,” he says softly. “I need you to know that before we have sex. I’m head over heels for you.” You open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out. “You don’t have to say it right now baby. I just want you to know how I feel.”
“Okay,” you whisper.
“Are you ready?”
You nod.
He slowly slides into you. The stretch feels amazing. Lifting your leg you open yourself up to him more. Everything in the world suddenly feels like it’s shifted. Your fingers claw at his shoulders as he thrust into you at a slow pace. His lips are yours kissing you like he needs you to breathe. This feels different than any other sex you've had before. Tangling your fingers in his hair you gently tug him away from your lips. You want to stare at him for a long moment.
“Oh my god-“ you moan.
“You feel like you were made for me,” he moans.
You hook your leg over his back just above his butt pulling him closer to you. His thrusts are incredibly deep with his slow pace.
“Please-“ you can only whimper and whine.
He rolls his hips a little faster. Your hands move down to his butt. Gripping his cheeks pulling him down closer to you. You feel as if you can’t get physically close enough to him.
“Baby do you want to change positions?” He must notice you want to have some sort of control. You seem like you desperately want to touch him.
“Please.”
He pulls out of you slowly and moves so he’s sitting with his back against the headboard. You waste no time straddling him. Slowly sinking down on his length. His hands rest on your hips helping you ride him. One of your hands rest on his cheek while the others rest on his chest right above his heart. Leaning toward you, press your forehead against his.
Silent gasps pass his lips.
“Fuck-“ you moan.
Your thighs burn as you ride him but that doesn’t stop you. Desperate to see what he looks like when he falls apart.
“Are you close?” You whine.
Silently he nods. One of his hands going up to take your breast. Squeezing it before rolling your hardened nipple between his fingers.
“Are you going to come?” He asked.
“Yes-“
You roll your hips a little faster. You clit brushes against his pelvic bone earning a wanton moan. Your second orgasm hits you harder than your first. Your hips stop moving as a white hot wave washes over you. Rolling your head back, you moan. His hands grip your hips as he moves your body up and down his length chasing his own release.
He falls apart moaning your name. You stare at him as he holds you flush against his thighs and he falls apart. The sight of him like this is absolutely breathtaking.
Your chest is heaving as you try to come down from your high slowly. Holding his face with both hands you slowly lean forward pressing your lips to his for a soft kiss.
“I love you,” you whisper the words that have been floating in your head for a while.
“I love you too.” He can’t help but smile.
“Thank you for giving me a reason to leave him.” You’ll never be able to thank Vernon for showing you that you could love someone else, and that someone could love you more than your ex did. He’s showing what it means to find your person. He’s making you believe soulmates could be real.
He pushes your hair away from your face. His thumb drags across your cheek slowly. “Falling in love with you is the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
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signedaiko ¡ 13 hours ago
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Hi there! Could I request HCs of Optimus Prime, Prowl, and Ratchet (separately) from Transformers Animated with a Cybertronian![S/O] [Romantic] [Gender Neutral] who is an Autobot specialized in Special Operations?
Cybertronian![S/O] is a commander of their own Special Ops team back on Cybertron doing missions ranging from hostage rescues to combat. They tried to visit Earth with the Elite Guards whenever possible to see their respective partner(s) since they missed them.
They may be misunderstood as tough, scary, and dangerous at first glance, sometimes mistaken for a Decepticon before showing their Autobot insignia. Even mentioning their designation (name) sends shivers down anybot’s struts (backs).
In actuality, they’re kind, sweet, and less serious when off duty and can take a joke.
Optimus | Prowl | Ratchet [Animated]
In which their s/o is the commander of the Autobot's information operations and visits Earth to see them.
Reader is: Gender Neutral | Cybertronian | Autobot.
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Optimus
Despite all his sucking up to the commander, Ultra Magnus, few knew Optimus looked up to more than just the one
He wasn't under your authority, but you were still a commander, and he was so utterly proud of you for amounting to something
He hadn't seen you since his touchdown on Earth, but you'd been checking on him far more frequently to make sure he was okay
Initially, he doesn't tell you about the cons and tells you it's just human villains because he knows you're busier than he could ever imagine and doesn't want you to worry even more
But you do find out through Ultra Magnus when it's reported, and it only takes a week before you can find an excuse to step away from your position to see him
Your arrival on a small, dark ship catches the attention of Bee and Sari during one of their excursions, and they both go running back to their team, claiming more Decepticons have arrived
When he does go to investigate, he's pleased to see you step from the ship, but your name coming from his mouth only seems to unnerve the others more
"Whoa! Prime, you know them???"
"More than know, actually. Everyone, meet my conjunx."
Jaws are dropping
Very quickly they get to learn your and Prime's history together, how you met in elite guard training, how he saved your life, how different you were than the rumors made you to seem
"Don't be fooled; they're very scary when they need to be."
Prowl
Prowl, like most things in his life, kept any mention of you to himself
After all, the others on his team liked to pry, and you were something precious to him; someone no one understood but him
Not only that, but he was worried if he brought you up, someone might try to contact you, and he knew that above all, your missions were at their peak, one after another
It didn't take anyone else, though; his own silence and lack of disclosure eventually led to you deciding to visit him yourself, which culminated in him literally waking up to the others screaming about a con at the base
He knew the very sound of your spark hum apart from any other noise and immediately told everyone else to calm down
Of course he's happy to see you, but he really wishes you wouldn't see him at such a low point
Stuck with a team of nobodies on a planet one hundredth the size of the one you protected
But you never cared about any of that; you were just happy to see your bot again, and beyond all the war stuff, he was happy to see you, too
He's very protective of you and doesn't let you spend too much time with the others because they're 'too annoying to deserve your attention'
Ratchet
Ever since the mission he carried out with you to save Arcee, he'd felt shame in comparing himself to you
Ratchet used to be on your team before you commanded it, but he eventually strayed into his current position while handling his guilt
Guilt or not, he admittedly hated that you'd taken up such an important position because it meant you had a bigger target on your back
Communicating with you poses a danger to you, so he's reluctant to send much your way and just accepts transmissions from you, which only Prime manages to find out about
Ratchet doesn't care if you're scary or not, if you're strong or not; he just wishes he could keep you from being known, keep you safe
Against all his wishes, you continue to be a more important link in the war effort, and you are the one protecting him in the relationship more than anything
Ratchet manages to keep your first few visits to Earth a secret, but it doesn't take much more for the others to meet you, especially after they had to help chase Lockdown off from trying to take you in
He doesn't have much of an ego, but he does like seeing the younger bots fawn over how cool his s/o is
And hearing them talk about how everyone fears you, well, it makes him feel just a bit more certain that you can protect yourself and that he shouldn't worry as much as he does
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Author's Note - I have actually been rewatching all of Animated so, perfect timing! Blitzwing forever tho <3
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zabala0z ¡ 2 days ago
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Welcome back to the first episode of “Listening to TMA S5, blind” I’m your beloved host and guys. Guys guys. I actually am freaking out.
MAG 161: Dwelling
I’m actually screaming. Hearing the old gang actually made me want to cry. SASHA. SASHA I MISSED YOU :(( also Elias: “I’d like to keep an eye out” you think you’re so fucking funny. I loved the very off key singing of Happy Birthday. Accurate. I wonder if Elias/Jonah sent the tapes for a reason. It’s definitely not to gloat. Is this apart of a wider web of manipulation? The Web style? Also, the fact Sasha could’ve been head archivist. Jesus
Hearing the description of the entities, that they don’t care enough to keep humanity fed and watered unnerved me a lot actually. I don’t know.
MAG 162: A Cozy Cabin
GERRY!!! Nice to hear him as a human, without all the ghost-like qualities. Although hearing Jon rewind the tape over and over and over and over again just made me feel bad.
And then Sasha and Tim.
“we had the ill-advised hookup, the awkward aftermath, and the gradually rebuilt friendship, but – that’s all season two stuff. We’ve got like five more seasons before we get the heartwarming epilogue that makes it canon.”
“No. You took it too far! I’m unforgettable!”
So what if I just ended it all?
Also Jon’s monologue. For a bit, I thought he was “knowing” one of Martins poems that he made during this since Martin was the one who did not like staying at the cabin but no, I was wrong. But time to see the outside world
MAG 163: In The Trenches
I wanna go back to the cabin.
I love TMA so much because of how the format switches up every season. Like season 1 was pretty simple enough with season 2 having Jon add in those supplementals and having a new setting (the tunnels). Season 3 cranks it up with having live statements from recurring characters, statements read by others, and dropping some lore. season 4, while similar to season 1 in terms of format, has Martin reading statements, more god damn lore and some new settings. And now season 5 has uh all this. It’s so amazing and I love it and I’m terrified.
Hearing Jon describe everything going on actuslly made me horrified. Like I got spooked out by the statements but this made me feel so much dread like I’m not even kidding. I also wanna know more about that weird ass doctor and the man with the red flower. Avatars of The Slaughter I presume.
Also that phone. ???? What???
MAG 164: The Sick Village
Gross. While the previous episode made me experience horror, this made me feel disgust. Disgust that just burrowed into my bones (get it. Cause..the episode-). I had such a deep instinct of repulsion. Like actually. I also read the triggers just cause you can never be too careful and I remember thinking, “how can xenophobia be involved with The Corruption?”…apparently xenophobia was very prevalent
Now I know where the whole “Martin’s middle name” thing comes from. I’m glad Basira is alive. And heart broken at the tragedy there is. She’s always chasing Daisy and Daisy is always chasing another thing SOMEBODY SEDATE ME
I think Georgie and Melanie are in the tunnels. It’s been established before that Elias can’t see in the tunnels which probably means Jon can’t see them. I’m glad they are safe. They need it.
Helen! Nice to see her again, I actually cackled when she said “check up on the happy couple”. Nice to see a confirmation about the relationship. This is like the worst time to be dating someone though 💀 Helen’s so happy. I’m sure she has a ton of people in her hallways. I don’t know if she’s lying about the “friend thing, but it’d be funny if she wasn’t
Okay. That’s everything. Sorry for the long wait, I had to take a break after season 4’s finale and then ANOTHER one after listening to the first 3 eps. This is like, actually heavy. Kinda draining. But god, I’m actually going insane.
I want to know how this is going to be fixed. Like. There’s gotta be some happy ending. ??? Right??? Please tell me there is one.
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gothamite-rambler ¡ 2 days ago
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Harley trying (and failing) to make amends with Nightwing
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artwork by: Padeliciouss (but I prefer this over a lot of her current outfits)
Context: Harley's application to join the Outlaws was "approved" because Bruce begged Jason to hire her so she would stop analyzing him and making him feel emotions he had buried and wanted to keep that way. Harley is happy about this, but she feels there’s one other former Robin who shares the same justified resentment toward her that Jason does. Nightwing, aka Dick Grayson, is fully on board with her pestering, talking to his brother and giving him a break from her not-annoying energy.
Harley Quinn, former bad guy, anti-hero, and unemployed therapist, chased after Nightwing as he tried to get away from her while on patrol.
Nightwing (looking back, frustrated): Stop chasing me!
Harley (playfully, grinning): Then have a chat with me!
Nightwing (exasperated): How did you find me?
Harley (pointing confidently): Babs told me.
Nightwing stopped running, causing Harley to halt as well. He put his index finger up and pressed his communication device.
Nightwing (angry, but composed): Oracle, explain?
Oracle (over the comms, slightly amused): She begged me, and I can't say no when she pinpoints my mental health issues! Jason is… he hates her way less than he used to.
Nightwing: Okay, why isn't she bothering him?!
Oracle (tentatively): He was the one who suggested that Harley try to get back on good terms with you.
Nightwing (sighing): We never were before this!
Harley (in a cheerful tone, playfully poking Nightwing's arm): There’s always a chance for a fresh start! I really want to be better friends with Jason since we’re teammates now. He put me on probation when he accepted my application for the Outlaws, which wasn’t an easy feat. Thank goodness Batsy let me use him as a reference! But that’s beside the point—I want to make amends and be cool with you! Being teammates works just fine for us. I'm still working with Jason and crossing my fingers that things go well!
Nightwing opened his mouth to speak, then sighed, leaning forward to process what he just heard.
Nightwing: That was a lot of new information to take in, but I'm going to scream at both of them later for that.
Oracle (aggravation in her tone): Nightwing, stop being a baby and let her patrol with you.
Nightwing (defensive): Me not wanting to be with a lunatic who used to not respect my boundaries and slapped my ass isn't me being a baby!
Poison Ivy walked over to the group while listening to music from 'Little Shop of Horrors' on her phone and glancing at her girlfriend, clearly bothering Nightwing.
Ivy (with a knowing smile): After hearing that, I can understand why he doesn't want us near him.
Nightwing (smiling at Ivy): Ivy, I’m actually cool with you. You were usually civil to me, especially when I told you about what happened with my stalker.
Ivy (nodding): I went through the same thing, but to be fair, Harley has as well, so we all have that in common. Although if you run away, I won't stop you.
Harley (whining): Babe!
Oracle (frustrated): Are you seriously going to take her word over mine, the friend you’ve had since—
Nightwing (interrupting): Yes, because you're being biased just because Harley is your friend! Ivy is dating her and can relate to me more than you!
Oracle (in a huff, frustration in her tone): Fine, I give up! Sorry for not telling you though, I mean that.
Nightwing (sincere): And I can forgive you. Now, if you'll excuse me—
In a moment of panic, he ran in the other direction. Oracle shrugged her shoulders and returned to talking to the other Robins on patrol for the night.
Ivy (uninterested, glancing up): I'm proud of him for taking my advice.
Ivy sighed, ignoring her girlfriend glaring at her, but held out her arm in the direction Nightwing ran off.
Ivy: Go ahead.
Harley grinned and nodded before running down the path the avoiding hero escaped to while shouting loud enough to almost wake the neighbors. Ivy resumed her music, casually trailing behind her.
Harley (playfully, shouting): Why are ya runnin'?! I ain't gonna hurt ya! I haven't harmed any of ya since the third kid became Robin!
Nightwing (insistent, exasperated): Doesn’t erase the annoying torture you put me through! I don’t want you touching me! I am not a piece of meat!
Harley (mockingly apologetic): I'm sorry, I wasn't aware ya were uncomfortable with the butt smacks!
Nightwing (defensive): I was very vocal about it!
Harley (teasing): Do you think that stems from some trauma in your past?
Nightwing (frustrated): Stop therapizing me!
Ivy (rolling her eyes with a sarcastic tone): That's the smartest approach, Harley.
Harley (waving her hands dismissively): Ivy, not now!
Ivy placed her hands on her hips with a judgmental smile.
Ivy: I seriously don't want to be the mediator between my girlfriend and the only Robin I like, but you're making that happen!
Nightwing ran behind Ivy and used her as a shield.
Nightwing (smirking): You like me? Aww, thank you.
Ivy (nonchalantly): You were a cute kid and agreed with my ideals, plus you hate the Joker.
Harley bobbed and weaved as Nightwing grabbed Ivy's arms, swaying her back and forth lightly.
Harley: Can't I get a pass for realizing he was a bad guy?!
Nightwing: That's a good first step; still don't like you, though.
Nightwing shoved Ivy towards Harley, causing both women to fall to the ground. Nightwing shrugged apologetically and held up his left leg, running off as if he were the Flash.
Nightwing (over his shoulder with a raised voice): Sorry, Pam!
Ivy (standing up and brushing dirt off her outfit): I'm not even mad about it, kid.
Harley tailed after Nightwing for the third time.
Harley: Ivy, you are being incredibly unhelpful as a freakin' mediator!
Nightwing (frustrated): You chasing me doesn’t make you look better, Harley. Leave me alone!
Harley (pushing Ivy off of her, determined): Let me make amends.
Nightwing (whining): NOOO! Spend time with Jason, that’s fine. I get that, but I already have to deal with the Joker being alive and I don’t want you around me!
Harley (enthusiastic, arms wide): I’m not with him anymore, though! I got a full bill of health at Arkham! I'm goin' to therapy and tryin' to be a travel therapist!
Nightwing kicked up his leg, not to make contact with Harley but to keep a distance.
Nightwing (in angry Romani): Sunt mulțumit de progresul tău, dar stai departe de mine! Nu vreau să fiu în preajma ta, lângă tine sau să mă gândesc la tine!”!
Harley (confused): What?
Ivy (rolling her eyes): He's speaking Romani.
Nightwing (calm but firm): Yes, and I said, "I am happy with your progress, but stay away from me! I don't want to be around you, near you, or think about you!" Please, I’m begging you to do this one good thing—if you have sincerely changed, then just give me space.
Nightwing glanced at the fence of the alleyway he made it to. It was a clear path to get back to his apartment, where he could relax with Kori. But when he turned back to Harley, her usual creepy grin was gone, replaced with a frown while she rubbed her arm full of guilt.
He lowered his leg, cursing his kind heart at the moment. He kept his distance but stood by what he said.
Nightwing: I am glad you're being nice to Jason… and got accepted into his team. Focus on that because whatever partnership you want with me… it will take some time.
Harley took a deep breath and then smiled semi-warmly, with a little Cheshire grin in the mix.
Harley: That's fair. My mind leans to listenin' to my impulsive thoughts, but seein' that I’ve backed you against a literal fence, I can see you do want that space. Just leave before I try to ambush you with a hug or somethin'.
Nightwing tilted his head, suspicious at first. Harley clenched her fist, trying to resist the urge to be spontaneous, but Ivy stepped in, using her vine to wrap it around her girlfriend's hip.
Nightwing half-smiled and then turned, jumping over the fence effortlessly and running off.
Nightwing (over his shoulder): Adios!
Ivy (waving): See ya, kid.
Harley (frustrated): Ivy… Why can't I do this redemption thing right?
Ivy (sincerely): Redemption isn't easy, Harls. Especially since you worked with the Joker for like two decades, and during that he killed one of them and tortures the Batfamily on a random basis. It's going to take time, and honestly, they might never forgive you or fully trust you. You're bettering yourself, though, and I’m… proud of you.
Harley (beaming happily): Really?
Ivy (genuinely): Yeah, I don't get trying to be nice to all of them—that's weird—but hey, you're doing a decent job at it. I wouldn't lie to you.
Harley sighed, resting her head on Ivy's arm.
Harley: I’ll give him space. Want to check out Lex's bar and get some drinks and wings that might make me feel better?
Ivy (shrugging with a smile): Works for me, "traveling therapist."
Ivy laughed dryly at the phrase while rubbing her girlfriend's arm supportively.
Harley (walking side by side with Ivy): Hey, it's goin' to catch on! Thanks for coming, though, Ivy. I love ya.
Ivy (sweetly): I love you too.
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buckbuckleybegins ¡ 13 hours ago
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God i hope this is around what you imagined. This prompt tugged at my angst loving ass 😭
•
Christopher has always been the elephant in the room since he left. The one topic that sticks in Buck’s throat whenever he considers bringing it up due to the fact that he can tell Eddie is suffering—even when he acts like he isn’t.
It’s been months now since that day Eddie’s parents showed up at his door to take Chris away from him… away from Buck. And Buck always feels so guilty whenever he thinks this because… as much as he loves and misses him, Chris has never truly been his. Even if Eddie’s made him his godfather, writing Buck’s name in his will… Chris isn’t his. He’s Eddie’s. And whatever feeling of loneliness, emptiness, and hurt he feels whenever he enters Eddie’s house and isn’t greeted by those curls full of laughter, smarts, and love—Buck knows Eddie feels it a hundred times stronger.
“I need to take him back,” Eddie says, still pacing around his living room. Buck—sitting on the couch after Eddie called him, urgently asking him to come over—wants to stop him, grab him by the arms and ground him before he spirals into a panic attack. Because Eddie looks frantic, terrified. He’s staring at nothing in particular with wide eyes, sweat glistening from whatever terrible thought his imagination is serving him in that moment. “He can’t—he can’t stay there, Buck. I can’t lose him.”
“Okay,” Buck says, calm and steady. For the first time since he’s arrived, Eddie looks at him—teary-eyed and scared out of his mind. And God, Buck can barely meet his gaze without feeling the exact same emotions crawl up his own throat.
“What do we do?”
Eddie pauses, covers his face with his hands, and looks like he wants to scream but instead just sobs. Buck’s heart shatters into a million pieces at the sound.
When Eddie’s hands fly off his face, he looks at Buck with a different expression. It’s still sad, but now there’s a quiet, simmering resolution that wasn’t there before.
“I’m going to Texas,” he says, looking Buck right in the eyes. “I’m going to take my son back.”
Buck feels his throat tighten at Eddie’s words, and this time, it’s his brain conjuring images after images of things he really wishes will never happen. But Eddie is suffering, and his suffering takes priority over whatever fear of abandonment Buck could ever feel. So Buck just nods and helps Eddie pack his bags.
—
There’s a sense of déjà vu when they reach the airport, and Buck quickly pushes it aside—or tries to, at least. Because it comes back once again, a million times stronger, as he looks at Eddie’s frame just outside the glass doors, bags in hand, ready to leave.
Ready to leave him—
But Eddie looks back. A smile on his face and a thank you on his lips. Buck wants to grab him by the hand, pull him away, and tell him not to go. Not to leave him as well, just like everyone else in his life because this time he doesn’t know if he will survive it.
But Buck doesn’t. Because Chris is away, Eddie is suffering, and Chris and Eddie have always been his priority. Is their happiness as important as yours? Buck remembers and he loudly declares to himself that yes, it is. Their happiness is so much more important than his.
Eddie notices, though. He always does. Buck never has to speak for Eddie to understand him. It’s kind of their thing. Their BuckandEddie thing. No words needed when you understand each other to the core.
Eddie takes a few steps toward him, lets his bag fall to the ground, and—does something unexpected. He unclasps the St. Christopher medallion from his neck, slipping it around Buck’s. His hand lingers there, warm and grounding, as if passing on a promise.
“I’ll be back,” Eddie says, a soft smile on his lips, full of this newfound determination. “We’ll be back,” he corrects himself.
Buck nods, smiles back, and he can’t stop the tears from falling down.
But, still? Still, he believes him. He believes that Eddie will be back, Chris in hand and happy.
And he keeps that thought close to his chest, his hand clasped around the medallion—the promise Eddie just made him. This time, he believes it. This time, he knows he won’t be abandoned again.
So um.. does anyone wanna maybe write a fic where Eddie goes to Texas to get Chris and buck ‘abandonment issues’ Buckley is feeling anxious that Eddie won’t come back and then Eddie takes off the st Christopher medal from his neck and puts it on bucks as like a symbolic thing to tell him he will (cos buck will be like I can’t- then Eddie is like this way you can just give it back to me next time you see me ) and they have a moment™️?
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tapakah0 ¡ 1 year ago
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This moment, when Mikey took him out of bandages... he started dissapiering, only then, not when Mikey was searching for him... I wondered if he was feeling himself save with his brothers...
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lovecolibri ¡ 16 days ago
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#gonna start d20 soon and i'll be live blogging that but i just got home and was hit with such a wave of grief about today.#thinking about my young brother and his young wife and knowing who they likely voted for. who her dad and my other brothers voted for.#knowing that this pregnancy she just had was high risk and if she gets pregnant again in the next few years and has an emergency#if she will be able to get treatment that saves her life or her her husband and father and brother-in-law that live with her#and maybe she herself signed her death warrant#thinking about my other sister-in-law who works as a surgical tec and does emergency deliveries#and wondering what side of the line she falls on. what side my brother falls on.#thinking about growing up in church and being a person filled with empathy and compassion for others#and watching people i respected and people i grew up with side with some of the most hateful ideals#out of what is ultimately fucking selfishness and wanting to scream and rail at them but knowing it makes no difference#because they just do not fucking care#thinking about the upcoming holidays and the casual homophobia thrown about as jokes#by white men who have never had to face down even the most basic of oppressions#knowing that any attempt to speak out means getting ganged up on by at least 5 people who just loooove being the calm whip smart debaters#because they don't have a dog in the fight and love 'winning' while i get so easily flustered and lose my train of thought#thinking about the fact my mom would rather allow a narcissist and t*ump supporter to live in our home#(that i pay the majority of the bills for) rather than put her foot down about him getting his own place#because i am and always have had to be the 'good' child who didn't make a fuss so the boys could be kept happy#otherwise nothing could ever get done and she cares more about making sure HE is doing okay and not struggling#than if i feel safe and comfortable in my own fucking home#ANYWAY#gonna eat and get in comfy clothes and watch something that reminds me there are normal people out there in the world
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mithomite ¡ 11 days ago
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hey just a reminder that sometimes you have to accept that you’re going to have to have feelings without a filter, and you’re going to have to tell people that you care about them, and you’re going to have to start saying i love you. if you want affection and love and adoration you cannot close yourself off forever and ever. keep up your walls as you must to protect yourself but not forever. and if you feel like you can’t ever let them down then i’m sorry. i hope you find someone that makes you feel safe enough to start saying and feeling these things.
#lolaa.txt#little thing about emotions.#i’m not affectionate. not really.#im a deflector and i laugh off affection and love a lot#and all it has ever done for me is push away people who want to help me so so badly.#and it’s a slow change. slowwwww. the tiniest steps .#and i go back so often.#today my boyfriend said he missed me and that i was pretty when i woke up and i told him i was going to never speak to him again#because i cannot accept these things and it so so hard to say that i appreciate it#but i know i know he needs to hear it and he needs to feel appreciated yknow?#and im working on it im trying so hard#especially when you have been fucked over for saying your feelings in the past. it’s hard. it’s so hard. and i’m sorry#just. tell your friends you love them. tell people when you’re excited or happy.#smile when you get to do fun things. laugh at jokes! scream and yell and cry and hit things and grin and be out there#numbness will not fix what problems you have. it won’t.#it’s comfortable but you can’t have love without discomfort sometimes#sorry about all this i’m just . i’m having a bad day and it’s really hard today to be open to everyone#so this is my try#i am upset. and i miss my friends. and i love my mom and i am also mad at her because i am frustrated with the world right now.#and i am tired but because its tiring to force myself to exist and feel#i need to relearn how to be a child about it#and that’s okay#that’s all ; sorry for the long tags. thank you for being here
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quietwingsinthesky ¡ 1 year ago
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Prompt: the archangelcule celebrating Jack's birthday 🙏
Lucifer runs himself ragged all week getting the party set up (and despite the fact that he’s done this for Jack every time he needs it since he came back into Michael’s life, it still leaves Michael surprised and wondering what happened to the boy who only knew how to bite the hand that fed when Michael abandoned him, when did he learn to be gentle and reliable, why did Michael waste all this time not seeing him?) to the point that he looks like he might fall asleep in front of the birthday cake before Raphael nudges him with their elbow, and he wakes up to sing.
They sing quietly — loud noises hurt Jack’s ears, one of many little oddities, but they rearrange their lives around his needs: no vacuuming unless he’s out of the house and no yelling from room to room — while Jack looks like he’s about to jump right out of his seat with how much he wants to blow out the candles. Gabriel scoops him up in one arm after, lets Jack’s tiny hand curl around the handle of the (dull!) cake knife while his lays over it to guide him, and helps him to cut pieces for them all himself.
(birthday 3 sentence ficathon! come toss a prompt!)
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pleasedontcareaboutme ¡ 1 month ago
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i think i finally realized why ive been feeling so damn depressed lately again
sorry for writing this here. im really hurting actually. im not good. i feel a bit helpless too. idk who to talk to bc i dont want to burden anyons and i donf feel like anything could console me right now
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Like. fuck me man. thanks for saving me but. why the hell are you not here. i dont want to do this without you. i hate only being able to remember you. i was supposed to grow old with you, not without you.
And. honestly. even with all this bullshit i say here, all the endless times i spend trying to write down my feelings, abt you, about all the pain ive felt my life, it doesnt get better. not at all. and no words, no poetry takes it away and i truly feel like nobody will ever truly understand how suffocated i felt all my life.
and i want to change thanks to you but. i dont know. nothing's satisfying enough.
no matter what, i truly only feel great when im in that daydream like world you created.
and these past days ive been thinking a lot that. i really wouldnt mind dying right now. not at all. because at least i know what happiness feels like. and i want to stay in that state. probably, even in this life your music will bring me happiness, but i want to be trapped in it.
im tired of being so unseen, and even when im seen, im hurting. but i dont know whats hurting. i think im just really tired thats all.
and. ye. i feel brave tbh. i still havent posted my video to instagram, bc im not brave for that. i dont know. and i feel like a hypocrite bc everything is true that i wrote there but at the same time these are my thoughts currently
in a long while i looked up suicide methods again. i feel so hopeful, but im not really sure if really for the future. jm sorry this is probably alarming. i will probably not kill myself but. idk. im not sure actually. i dknt know what to say. i wasnt cut out for this wordly shit.i feel unlovable but even if im loved, i donf want to be. i dont want anything. just let me stsy in this quiet place snd just. disappear. i wouldnt want my family to hurt if i die but i wont know about it anyways. idk man. i feel strongly i could die calmly this time and thats nice. bc 6 years ago i was terrified, and hurt. but now im content and kind of ready idk man. its not a terrible feeling, its a "this is it, it was nice while it lasted" ig.
there are no clouds in my head actually. i truly dont feel like im thinking irrationally, i feel like this would just be like. the end goal i was looking for. to feel true love once. it was nice.
no goodbye yet bc idk how id kms even if i do. But ill tell u guys if i found something.
#you know it's funny#i still feel this way but the moment i wrote this#on tiktok one of my friends that was there for most of my times followed my secret tiktok account and#the friend that i lost last year checked my account and#i hope she fucking knows how much that means to me#because i always felt like she hstes me but i still deeply feel she cares abf me and silently looks out for me and i feel so sorry#bc in the past 4 days she has checked my account multiple times and idk man#i truly feel like she sees that im struggling i appreciate it a lot#but i could never tell her that because what if im wrong and also#i dont fit in that friendship anymore#but im still really greatful#for checking up on me even like this#*most of my life#noticed a typo#idk anyways i just really needed to scream this into the void. I didn't want to be so sad today. i just scrolled instagram to numb myself#all day. but i got off my phone it was terrible. idk. i feel im not sure i can get my shit together by monday#im sick of having to fall apart and build myself up every fucking day man. and each day i literally wake up telling myself affirmations#trying to convince myself that its oka#it will be okay at least when u are home at night. wait for that moment everyday but. im tired of waiting for night to be happy man.#i have 30 mins to either post that fuckin video and make a fool of myself bc i told myself i need to post it on the 19th. but idk man. Im#terrified it will only disappoint me. people will make fun of me. idk man. its not that funny is it. or is it? how pathetic i am for clingi#g to the only hope in my life like a fucking abandoned dog man. but what can i do. i dont want to depend on you so much. but then who shoul#i depend on? if i depend on myself im just gonna kill myself man.idk. my grief is getting worse day by day. i still practice guitar everyda#hoping that maybe you will come back or something will come back. maybe mywill to live will come back? maybe the Instrument will play a not#that I can depend on? i dont really know what im looking for thats the worst. living is uncomfortable and dark. even when im smiling with m#friends i feel lost.there's something i feel like they know and i dont. when they could name their favorite colors in kindergarten i alread#knew something was different abt me.its really isolating.not having a clue of who am i.i keep saying im finding myself more and more but tb#i still in a way like im always wearing a costume. i wonder how naked id have to be to find myself. sorry for word vomitting.it maybe helps#anyways acchan i miss you.this world feels really stale without you.i wish I could truly show how much I love you with my words or life but#i dont really think it makes a difference.my voice really doesnt matter that much in the end.maybe im too much
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