#I wanted to die in my sleep
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me fixing my mascara and eyeliner for the 398l92616694201762th time today because I can't stop crying
#Urgh#Anxiety and ovulation killing me rn#I'm about to be late#☹️#I didn't even want to wake up#I wanted to die in my sleep
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figure skating set right now please. thanks
#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#emu otori#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#wxs#wonderlands x showtime#GUYS I AM PUTTING OFF WORKING ON MY COSPLAY SOMETHING STUPID. im tireddddd i like sleeepingggff i want to play and drawwwww#after work I literally ate a giant bowl of mac n cheese and climbed into bed. lifestyle choices of a 9 year old#anyways i want figure skaitng set. bad. PJSK HAS A WEIRDLY LOW NUMBER OF ACTUALLY WINTERY SETS... like 3. kind of.#i have some thumbnail sketches but im kind of stumped on composition for them. my idea was a nene focus set#(IF HER NEXT FOCUS ISNT PHANTOM OF THE OPERA THEMED INWILL DIE. BADLY. THEYRE GOING TO AN OPER AHOUSE. PLEADBR)#originally my idea was for nene to be biting a medal i was very sold on it bc i love nenes competitive side#however her outfit is so nice i want it to also be part of the art .. its heavily inspired by that one iconic eunsoo lim dress#from her somewhere in time program iirc. im really undatisfied with emus dress tbh my origimal idea was to give it a phoenix look#but a lot of the firebird/phoenix skating programs have very sleek dresses and i want emus to be fluffy. the balance is hard ..#and since i want her program song to be once upon a dream from sleeping beauty i swerved to make it look a bit like auroras ? but again#it definitely feels like the weakest of everybodys ... maybe i just love her too much and want her to look the best. sorry wxs.#tsukasas outfit is supposed to look like a shooting star. easy. program music moonlight sonata 3rd movement like from dazzling light. easy.#actually i like takahashi daisukes moonlight sonata program its a medley of the 1st and 3rd movement.. i think the calm at the beginning#is best. maybe smth like that.. for his card inhad him doing a haircutter spin but again. the outfits good i want the outfit visible. damn.#ruis the one im very set on even now. girl why are you so phantom of the opera.#it has a lot of beautiful programs to reference but the outfit i didnt really have any solid reference i kind of just balled#my main idea was to make it look a bit like both christine and the phantom.... gender Fluid.#my yapfest... i should be SEWING!!!!!!!!#despite my yapping im not that well versed in figure skating i cant really distinguish jumps i just like it . and medalist#i only do normal skating. bc i played hockey for like 7 years LOLLLL inlove skating though Heart.
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Penelope is also Athena's pet/blorbo/special little mortal/etc. and if you think otherwise you're straight up wrong.
You're also wrong if you think Athena only likes Penelope because of Odysseus and/or Telemachus. As if Athena didn't see a young Penelope pull some shit and immediately think "Oh! Another mind to mold! C'mere you! Let's do some riddles and weaving!". Athena was happy that two of her favorite pets have met and fell in love!
#maybe even Athena introduced them! idk#I mean c'mon. Pen is KNOWN for her weaving AND her Cunning and she basically knew that was Odysseus that was in disguise#Athena had to make Penelope go to sleep because she was sad AND she would've figured shit out.#Idc who Athena favored first but Athena definitely favored Penelope even before she was married. I will die/kill on that hill#everytime I see someone minimize/erase/devalue/etc. Penelope I want to bash my head against the wall.#*bangs pots and pans together in rage*#I think some of you only like Penelope because Odysseus likes her :') not all but... enough that it makes me sad.#like I've noticed some people only like my odysseus posts and not my Penelope ones. and oof. ;~; that tells me a lot😞#like yes. she's a bit of an enigma...AND THAT'S THE POINT. She's so intelligent that she's tricking the narrator/audience AND Odysseus!#Mad rambles#penelope#penelope of ithaca#penelope odyssey#penelope of sparta#Water Wife#odyssey#the odyssey#greek mythology#tagamemnon#athena#epic the musical#shot by odysseus#essay
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This fic is leaving rent free in my head since a week so go read it: Haunting by @iiidunno : https://archiveofourown.org/works/54832273/chapters/138984958 [Edit] ok I put half a BG 'cause really It was bothering me
#star wars#star wars the bad batch#tbb fanart#tbb fanfiction#never drawn something so complex kill me#Yes I gave up on the color halfway#Anyway the pictures are just here to lure you into reading this fic who again PRINTED in my brain#I want to apply for SW zines so I thought I should draw more complex art#turn out it takes times#idk zine people you tell me#tell me I love doing zines OvO#I mean I will apply to your zine but not with my sw art this will be awkward#ANYWAY I drew theses scenes#it's out of my mind#I can sleep now#god its 3 am what am I doing with my life#The anatomy is flatten on the ground but can only draw weird camera angles or I die#I still think this could be more dynamic but again#drawing people interacting is hard#ok bye
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owie my hand hurts from drawing these OKAY SO:
chodark au where chosen is. dragon hybrid and dark is an overworked researcher who accidentally found her
#my art#animator vs animation#ava#ava the chosen one#ava tco#ava tdl#ava the dark lord#chodark#ava chodark#ava ships#alan becker#the chosen one x the dark lord#tco x tdl#this came from me wanting to draw dragons all of a sudden#it’s like it’s 2016 all over again#big OUCH for my hands and esp my right ring finger esp#also drawing this while rewatching the untamed#lmao imagine a wangxian au of chodark#i think i would genuinely die#okay enough rambling i need to (go on my phone first) go to sleep
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Bring your sidekick to work day!
Inspired by the "What if Question was the one who saves Danny from GIW?" post that I made awhile ago.
Bring your sidekick to work day!
It was a tradition that started around the time multiple superheroes were taken on sidekicks. Everyone in the league knew why they'd bring their sidekicks to work. Their sidekicks get to socialize with peers their own age and they could properly introduce themselves to other heroes.
So it was a surprise when The Question, the league's faceless conspiracy theorist, offhandedly mentioned that he'll be bringing his sidekick to work while telling them about what new information he's found about Cadmus and another new government agency he thought they should start looking into.
The heroes found it hard to believe.
Question has a sidekick.
Surely they must have misheard.
No way that guy would want a sidekick, let alone get a sidekick.
When "Bring your sidekick to work day" arrived everybody was prepared to see the heroes and sidekicks.
Superman with Superboy
Batman and his 10+ kids
Wonder Woman and Wonder Girl
Flash and Kid Flash
The list went on
The heroes all mingle before realizing that they haven't seen Question. Maybe they did mishear the man? Or Question got his words mixed up?
That was until the computer announced the arrival of Question and a guest that was unidentified.
They all turn around to see the faceless trench coat wearing investigator followed by a tinier faceless trench coat wearing kid. The kid was practically a clone of Question, except...tinier.
"This is my sidekick. Who." Question points to the faceless kid
Flash: Who?
"That's me!" the kid says pointing to himself.
"Why don't you acquaint yourself with the others." Question tells his sidekick who just nods and goes off to introduce himself with the others kids.
Batman: I didn't take you one for having a sidekick.
Question: I could say the same for you. And the sidekick thing just kind of happened. The kid wouldn't leave me alone and I couldn't let the kid get himself into any trouble.
Batman: Understandable
Meanwhile with the sidekicks.
Everybody's asking Who various questions about Question and how he met the man. They barely know anything about the guy.
Question 1: What's the deal with your name?
Who: It's a work in progress. Since my mentor's name is Question. I figured my name should be like a question.
Question 2: How do you eat?
Who: I shove food into my face
Question 3: Where's your face?
Who: Wouldn't you like to know
Question 4: Do you know about his conspiracies?
Who: Of course I know about his conspiracies! I'm one of them
Other sidekicks: What?
After some talking, the sidekicks get along with each other very well. When they reunite with their mentors the computer rings stating that John Constantine was coming along with a guest.
The heroes then all watched as a girl with white hair and green eyes wearing a trench coat and was dragging John Constantine by his sleeve. She grins and introduces herself as Dani with an "i" and that she's John's apprentice.
Dani then spots Who and they immediately do the Spider-man point at the other meme
Who (Danny): you got a trench coat mentor too?!
Dani: Where's your face?!
#dp x dc#dp x dc au#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc#danny phantom x dc#the question dc#I want Question and John Constantine to be in the reluctant dad/mentor category#Like they didn't ask to be babysitting half ghost/ half human beings#but they would die before hey would let anything happen to them#Dani pointing at John “this is my pet human I make sure that he eats sleeps and bathes regularly”#John: Dumping a bucket of water on me when I'm passed out on the couch does not mean I took a bath!#Danny pointing at Question: he lets me shapeshift into my no face form and scare the other heroes#Question: he keeps the heroes busy when I'm digging through their garbage
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Nimona headcanons I wrote instead of sleeping
Sometimes the boys forget that Nimona isn’t human
Like they’re used to the shifting into animals aspect of Nimona because she does it as often as she breathes
But sometimes she’ll do some really creepy shit like make her arms longer to reach something when she’s too lazy to get up
One time they shifted just their neck to be like an owl so they could turn their head 180 degrees instead of just turning around cause that was “too boring”
Or he’ll mimic people’s voices without realizing it
Sometimes he’ll tell a story and suddenly he’s using Bal’s voice
The first time she did this Bal searched the whole house cause he was convinced that Todd has snuck in
Or she’ll grow an extra arm to hold more shit and they take a moment to realize “oh yeah we adopted a little weirdo”
They get used to it after a while and the arguments surrounding it are always funny because both the boys will complain and say “I don’t sound like that” and they have to be told “No love you do you really do”
You know those videos of babies reacting to their parents shaving their facial hair or putting on glasses
That’s Nimona's reaction every single time the boys change their appearance even the smallest bit they cant shave or wear their reading glasses because if they do he freaks out
Talking some “help me Nemesis I heard bosses voice but I can’t find him” while Bal was standing right in front of them
It was the first time he shaved his face in years and he’s never doing it again
Mostly cause Ambrosius kept telling him he looked like a teenager and it was freaking him out
I feel like Bal and Ambrosius are those kinds of people who will tell people about the little injuries but neglect the big ones
Like Bal mentioned that he thinks he sprained his ankle during the fight at the institute but he won’t mention that he’s pretty sure he got a concussion
(BECAUSE THIS MAN HEAD-BUTTED TWO PEOPLE WHEN HE HAS A METAL ARM)
(I’m bout to wrap this man in bubble wrap and give him a helmet because wtf)
Ambrosius will complain the whole day about the fact that he has a paper cut
But will completely neglect to inform his doctors “Oh yeah I can’t move my left arm higher than my waist without pain and I can’t see that well out of my left eye or hear that well out of my left ear do you think that’ll be a problem?”
It isn’t until Nimona makes an off handed comment about how this super weird that the laser did basically nothing to him that he told both of them
They literally dragged him to the ER because “Who thinks those symptoms are normal Nemesis what is wrong in that pretty little head of yours!!”
When Bal tells Nimona she’s being a bit of a hypocrite (cause who refers to an arrow as a splinter?) she turns to him and says “I know you’re not saying something Mr. Human battering ram”
It took literally everything in Ambrosius not to break down laughing
After that she forces them to have frequent checkups with the doctor because these dorks wouldn’t go otherwise
Honestly I'm fully convinced that some people in the kingdom don't know who Nimona is and are constantly confused why they let this little weirdo follow them around
And finally the curiosity will eat away at them and they’ll finally ask
Sometimes the boys will give some “normal” answers like “Oh that’s Nimona” and they won’t elaborate at all
Sometimes they’ll give funnier answers like “Oh that’s a raccoon we found in the garage who turned into a person one day” “I don’t know they just showed up in our living room” and their personal best “You see her too?”
And their favorite that they only started using a couple of years down the line “Oh that’s our kid”
#nimona 2023#nimona movie#nimona headcanon#nimona#ballister boldheart#ambrosius goldenloin#ballister x ambrosius#goldenheart#I just know these accident-prone dorks don't go to the doctor#which i respect because neither do I#Ambrosius would rather memorize the eye chart than admit he needs glasses#and that is a hill I will die on#I feel like NImona freaks out at changes in appearance because it reminds her that things don't stay the same forever#she's immortal the boys arent#she forces them into frequent checkups because she doesn’t want to find out too late that something is wrong#she wants to know that they did everything in their power as soon as they could of something does come up#and best case scenario they live very long happy lives#but I like to believe that they get reincarnated and find each other in every life#because I'm sappy like that#excuse my sleep deprived rambling#I’ve found so many issues with this post
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If people keep tagging their perfectly normal vanilla ass fics as "typical consent issues inherent to mithrun" and shit like that, I'm gonna start biting people. Some of yall aren't actually examining the complexities of Mithrun's relationships with other people, and what it means to desire something vs consent to it, you just don't think disabled people can consent to sex. fucks sake
#and as a demisexual person im also gonna say some of yall forget that ace people also can consent to sex#even if the attraction/desire isnt there#Mithrun#kabumisu#like fuck#take a hot second to consider that mithrun DOES say no to things repeatedly in the manga#“im not hungry”#“im not tired”#and in those instances he HAS to be coerced into eating or sleeping or he'll DIE!!!#but later we see kabru give him a REASON to eat on his own#“you can't defeat the demon on an empty stomach”#like im begging yall to stop tagging things as dubcon when they're clearly not dubcon#ive seen fics tagged as dubcon where mithrun explicitly agrees to fuck#and it makes me want to print the fic out so i can rip it up with my TEETH#if yall can realize that no means no#yall should also be able to realize that YES MEANS YES#im gonna put my head through a wall#should i make this rebloggable?#i might change it if yall cant behave
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ghost stares at the ceiling, chest heaving in a harsh pant; sweat ice on his clammy flesh and soaked into the sheet he restlessly kicks away.
ears still ringing, his fingertips blindly drift down to trail along his vivisection scar. he half-expects blood to smear in their wake. his own line of solomon, who ordered him split in twain; half of him given to a grieving mother and half left with the grieving to be.
just for both his broken halves to be rejected.
what did it make him that his mother grieved him more than she loved him? that she begged to be relieved of him more adamantly than she begged to receive him? why did his worth spill out with his drawn blood? why was his pain lesser than hers?
his hand flexes, digging into the raised scar like it’ll part beneath his fingertips to plunge into his mangled insides. no one knows the cruelty of reforming the halved; his name, his being, not nearly as important as his body when he was stripped from himself. no one knows the pain of healing and understanding losing pieces of yourself means losing your value along with them.
how many more pieces did he have to lose before he was halved once more? before his very presence incurred grief so strong it was better to be rid of him than cradle his bloodied remains?
did the infant fight himself? did he age always at odds with himself; his halves never truly whole? he hopes he wasn’t, that he was spared the loss of self; the fear that one may be welcomed over the other.
who will he lose when the inevitable comes? when he’s ripped apart again? simon? or ghost? is it better to be cursed with choice just like his mother or live with an aftermath chosen for him? does it matter if in the end, he convinces himself there was nothing of him left to lose?
his head lolls to the side and the wild buck of his chest slows. he watches johnny beside him, his face lax with the rare peace of sleep; his cheek squished against the pillow, his lips pursed as long breaths escape him.
johnny. soap. never torn asunder but two all the same.
he carefully reaches out and ghosts his fingers along the jagged scar on his chin. even in sleep, he presses into his bloodied touch. he’s never fled his half-flesh, never shies away from his gore as it spills unbidden from his cleaved torso. he holds on where his mother let him go; cups his stomach to hold his insides in place and never minds the blood that drips through his fingers.
simon will never let him become his own solomon and cannibalise himself. he will never let him question which half of him has more value; which pieces he can afford to lose before he’s cast aside.
ghost’s soap. simon’s johnny. his.
whole, in any incarnation.
#yall know the story of king solomon?#and the two mothers who claim a baby is theirs so he orders the baby cut in half so they can each have half of him?#well guess what woke me up out of a dead sleep and demanded to be written?#anyway roba showing simon clips of his mum on the news begging for the safe return of her boy#for the government to do something; /anything/ please she just wants her son back#just for ghost to dig himself out of simon's coffin and she can't bear to look at the man he's become#he's cold and afraid and hesitant and angry and in pain and so different from her little boy that it's just too difficult for her#he's a living breathing reminder that her simon didn't come back from the desert#and ghost has to live with the knowledge that his mum couldn't love him through anything#that maybe if he got himself out sooner if he was stronger or smarter or a better soldier... if he hadn't let simon die...#maybe he wouldn't have changed so much that she wouldn't look him in the eye and see a stranger#if you know anything about me by now you know i love the separation of the self and the person they become around others or bc of trauma#whether thats hizashi and present mic or simon and ghost its one of my absolute favourite tropes#and simon knowing hes become someone else and going home expecting to still be loved anyway?#just for this new version of himself to be rejected?#thats the moment he fractures into ghost#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap cod#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#ghost call of duty#cod mw2#cod mwii#save post
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made the huge mistake of deciding to do a big playthrough of all of Shadow's games before playing SxSG cause now every time I open steam it feels like this
#im not even supposed to have shadow gens on steam i ordered a physical copy that isnt gonna come in for like a week but my bitch friend who#i hate bought me the steam version cause he hates me and wants me to die#im done SA1 and 2 this is gonna be an agony week#tfw my roommate is a sonictuber and i had to go to sleep with earbuds in so i didnt hear spoilers throught the walls#sth#sonic#sonic the hedgehog#sonic generations#sonic x shadow generations#sxsg#sxs generations#shadow the hedgehog
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"And soda; runs off into the street..." "...and soda... is totally okay!"
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#cw blood#something something cracking open a boy w the cold ones#IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES I MISSED I SWWWEAR TO JEBEDIAH. IF I STARE AT THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA DIE IT NEEDS TO BE DONE#ALSO RRRAAAHAHHHGHGH CAN I JUST TAKEA SECOND TO SCREEAAMM ABT HOW MUCH I LOVE SODA AND EMIZEL.. LIKE THERYE SO CUTE....#THEY ARE HOMIES THAT KISS EACHOTHR GOODNIGHT. THEY CARE SO MUCH FOR EACHOTHER. SODA LOVES SODA AND SODA LOVES YOU#do u guys remember how willing he was to share blood w his vampire bestie. like cmon. remember when emizel memorized sodas Soda Schedule.#LIKE CMON.... they just have eachothers backs so much. ouhhh my god... ANYWAY SO THE ART HUH. I FEEL LIKE I SCRAMBLED W IT FOR A WHILE#DRAWIN IS HARD..... i think i did well in the end tho.. i like the lil heart beat effects. and i hope i made soda look Suffieciently Scared#i ALSO had fun w the teeth. i however did not have fun w the walls. if i had more drugs i mightve done every brick in more detail#but i didnt WANNA!!!! this will suffice.I HOPE IT FLOWS WELL&THAT ITS CLEAR... IVE STARED AT IT SO LONG IT IS NOW VISUAL SOUP. HELP!!!#i want my comics to have more Pauses and Space and Thought and Momence. i feel like normally they go so fast. but THIS time#i think i did good.... huuoouhhhh.... comics are HARD art is HARD but i am HARDER. or something. OH YEAH I HAVE MORE ART THINGS#soda was RLY HARD FOR ME TO DRAW FOR A MINUTE..but i like where his design is now. i wanted his hair to be curly swirly.like soda fizz#i THINK thats all my thoughts for now. if u have thoughts u should spill them in the tags i looooove reading tttaaggsss#have a goodnight i gotta go to work soon. maybe. unless the casinos power goes out AGAIN. OR SEOMTHING... UUGHHH MY SCHEDULE IS IN SHAMBLES#I THOUGHT I WAS WORKIN 3 DAYS INA ROW SO I RENTED A WHOLE DAMN HOTEL BC THE JOB PLACE IS FAR AWAY.. I HAD TO CANCEL THE WHOLE RESERVATOn#annd im MMMMAD ABOUT IT!!! like ill get over it ofc BUT IM PEEVED!!!! IM INCONVIENIENCED AND GENTLY AGGRIVATED. BUT OVERALL FINE.#hope yalls weekend goes well. sleep well. if u get the chance to.
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admittedly one of my favorite things about house ( that also drives me up a wall ) is that something Really Big happens and then the next episode they like loosely mention it like wow wasn’t it crazy that that happened . anyway haha
#once again i’ve just finished s2 so don’t tell me about any plotlines i do not know ab ‼️‼️#like okay i UNDERSTAND that so many things happen in episodes to keep you engaged but like#i want it to linger .#i want sore relationships that don’t fit i want i love you but i’ve looked into your eyes as you crumbled so i keep you at arms length#because i don’t know if i can be there to hold your hand the next time i don’t know if i can do that again#i want i love you but i can’t live without this piece of my heart anymore and you proved it#i want characters to look at each other both thinking of The Thing They Can’t Say#because of the thing that happened .#anyways this is about foreman almost dying this is about house getting shot this is about wilson sleeping with his patient#this is about chase’s dad dying this is about chase letting his patient die this is about cameron’s husband#this is about house’s parents this is about wilson giving up his job to defend house this is about stacy this is about#they have so much good ANGST that has the potential to make their relationships unhealthily dependent#and i .#i need to eat it up#house#house md#gregory house#greg house#hilson#houseposting#lgbtq#lgbt
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Garet is literally so friend shaped. I can't believe how friend shaped this boy is. (top pic is actual dialogue)
#golden sun#garet#ivan#guys im sorry i spent all day on this and also a smidge of oc art#im in pain and im not going to die but wow#my sister was like do you want me to drive you to the hospital and i told her i do not have the finances for that so no#and then she texted me fifteen minutes later to say#if its only the money issue i will help cover the costs#and i wont say what she googled that made her so concerned as an end result but uh lets hope it aint that ???#hopefully i can sleep tonight cause i have almost zero sleep in my system#bc i started to hurt a lil after midnight ?? like then i postponed sleep to take pain meds#and then woke up constantly and couldnt stay asleep#so i really just wanna go to bed
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The queercoding in Sangcheol's and Jeongwoo's relationship
Let me preface this by saying: everyone is still allowed to see them as whatever they want (a work related relationship, best friends, close friends, soulmates, lovers, and and and) but I think most (if not all at least here on tumblr) can agree it would be ignorant if we completely overshadow just how much queerness there is.
This analysis is brough to you by this thread (why JW is snow white and why SC is the prince) and @thedevildeer latest post. Its not structured and really just a ramble so excuse me if it might sound a little confusing at some points.
Let's start by looking at it through a heteronormative kdrama lense below the cut
How often do most kdrama fans watch a drama, see the lead man and the lead woman and think "woah, they would look so hot as a couple" even when the drama isn't a romance? Quite often, that's right. That's because most M/F leads are designed to be shipped even outside of the stereotypical romance genre. If it's a crime drama, thriller, mystery etc. Where the focus should solely lie on the plot they will still most likely try to create an M/F duo so most kdrama fans will have something to latch into. It has happened so many times that people dropped a non romance drama because it had no M/F couple, but people apparently want it so badly because how else can they enjoy a non romance drama, right? And kdrama directors/writers know this- they see and read the reviews and work with them; That's why in kdrama land M/F ships are still the norm, still seen as the most canon- even if there is a 2nd ML who has insane chemistry with the 1st ML (perhaps even more than the FL, cuz let's also face it in a lot of kdramas women are written flat)
When the ML is near the FL, everyone immediately interprets all kinds of thoughts into it, even worse when they go as far as to look at each other and hold eye contact, when they worry about each other, support each other, visit each other or are just having a work related conversation. They dont need to confess their love or kiss for the viewer to know they are in love*
Those are all valid points for shipping, that's obivously not the issue- The issue starts when they genuinely can't see the FL as her own character, when they can't seem to understand that men and women can be platonic friends, the issue continues when the 2nd ML appears whos got way more chemistry with the 1st ML or even takes the place of where the FL should be. Its then where the issue peaks- their relationship will automatically treated differently (2nd ML get potentially hated by the M/F shippers even) and it creates rift within the fandom, its shipping and arguments about queerness as a whole (discrediting that queerness is a large spectrum) by cishet fans
Suddenly, if it's M/M those actions I mentioned earlier dont seem romantic anymore, suddenly it's just a simple bromance (and while the term per se isnt homophobic, in these circumstances it sure sounds like it which is why I personally dont like it and rarely use it), best friends caring about each other because homies are homies. ("why can't men stay friends?" we all know that argument) *if they don't confess to each other outright, don't kiss each other, then they aren't i love (last part especially is targeted towards specific BL fans who only think a relationship is valed if they kiss and maje out)
So, this out the way let take a look at SC, JW, HS and BO approach (intentionally or not) on queercoding and the importance of a strong man-woman friendship.
First, let's look at tropes commonly (but not exclusively) found in queer media or media that tries to imply queerness and the similarities they share with SCJW:
Found family (the most common trope in queer media, especially the media that emphasises on realness, as found family serves as a safe space for queer characters when they arent accepted at home)
A strong opposite gender friendship or a friendship that defies traditional views
Color coding (mostly a warm and a cold colour, often times its blue and red)
Language coding (do the characters say they are queer, do they use specific terms, do they confess or declare their love for each other through something deeper; just what are they saying?)
The character design (this is not just about how they look but the desgin as a whole: background story, family, friendships, career, driving force, are they representing something (like a specific color, a flower); what was the creators thought process while creating them)
How do they express love around the person they ador (for example, men express love with touches while women often times use words and actions)
Broken friendships (because old friends dont accept)
Then of course we have common tropes found in all media highlighting love
Clothes sharing
Intense eye contact
Personal space
Lingering
Caring
Hurt/Comfort
Touches
And what do we have here? That's right. Black out s well as SC, JW and HS fit right into the common tropes and the queercoding tropes and yet we see some totally discrediting its validity to exist within the universe because god forbid both JW and SC are queer or viewed as such cuz they both were with women prior and they can't possibly be one of them queers... right?
HS is a really well written female character who's got nuances, a great backstory with a fair share of suffering and the additional nosiness which makes her so special. She is sweet and caring to everyone who seems nice in her eyes. She cares about JW's mother (prior to knowng he's JW's mother so thers no point in saying she does it cuz of JW), cares about Suoh and is genuinely interested in his hobbies. Her character takes care of everyone because she's a med student (you can take a med's job away, but you can never take the job out of a med). This is what her character is about- taking care, worrying. Her purpose in Mucheon was (as we know by ep.13) to find what shes looking for, to find her way back. She is by no means not connected to eithe JW and SC but her story is canonically detached from both JW's and SC's- it takes part in a different pace, in a different setting and through a different lense and most of it happens off screen or throug her observig the people. We rarely get any of her POV's, unless it's either around Suoh or Geonoh. The other times when we do get a POV of her is when SC and JW and in the same frame. Then she is postitioned as the onlooker, the one who observes. When she is alone with JW she gets almost no POV, even less that focuses on her feelings towards him. But the most important thing I said already: her story is detached from SCJW. She grows alone unlike SCJW who grow together. She is that friendship JW needed to show him a part of humanity that got lost with his fake friends. She is to represent and tell that you do not need a large group of friends to feel at home.
Then there is JW. Beautifully written full of nuances, a tragic yet amazing written backstory- easily to read as a story of someone being queer. A big group of friends, a beautiful home with loving parents and then you got the catalysator which sets the whole plot moving. While for JW it's murder, abuse, gaslighting by friends and people he thought were family, prison and finding new hope in humanity through one person- how can one not look at this and think "yeah it's somewhat reminiscent of someone coming out in a conservative country with traditional family values"? Family and friends ditching before the person can even stand up for themselves, people spreading venomous lies, all the guilt trips, that person shutting themselfs off retreating into their own little world. JW was obviously never meant to be read as such and some even might find this part weird, but it's undeniable he has those classic queercoding tropes. He finds true meaning in humanity again through HS and SC at the same time, yes, but it is SC alone who stands by his side the whole time- every single day. JW feels the safest around SC, falls asleep in his home (therefore also in his presence) and gives in to being taken care of only when SC is around, he also laughs at his dumbs jokes and makes sure to catch his reactions when he is sassy (handing out flyers scene or the scene at the scrapyard). JW is meant to not grow alone but together with someone else- and that someone is SC. who he shares the exact same pain with. He sees the good in people- he sees the good in SC so he keeps on pursuing him even when he would reject him. Because he can see himself in him. Because he feels he's different- just like him. (And isnt it like: Queer people know someone is queer when they see one?). We cannot forget him being a metaphor for Snow White which imo solidifies the queercoding in him even more and how he steps in to save SC and then again to support him by beating up those debt collectors. (Also, just a random little side note: I think it's funny how he's either loved or hated, there was no inbetween. BM and MS hated him, they were eaten up by jealousy; BY, NG, DE and the twins loved him (also again, random side note to me any anyone who cares: it's so easy to read the feelings GO felt towards JW prior and post time skip as more than just friendship tbh which again, adds to the queerness layer))
And then there is SC, just as complex and full of nuances like JW. Having an almost identical tragic backstory to hm even- losing the love of his life. While hes story is way more difficult to decipher as queercoding, his character is most definitely not. He is portrayed as rude and rough towards any criminal and at the beginning of the story we genuienly dont know where we stand with him with this ever fluxuating personality. He is hurt, struggles, doesn't even seem to know himself very well, has seen a lot and he also doesnt trust anyone (as seen when he immediately clocks BM as suspicious when the review the CCTV footage) except JW. How come he trusts him more, even after he had accused him of the hit and run accident, but is side eying everyone the moment the incident with the mother happens? When he should have more trust in his own people then defending and caring for a guy whos accused him of causing the car accident. Even when he finds out JW apparently killed the girls, his actions towards him are differet than the actions we see him taking against the guy he chases after in the beginning. We see him falter and struggle even more in the manhole when he's threatening to shoot JW, we see it again when they are at the shed and JW is reinacting the murder scene- he is reluctant. Even when using violence against JW. Because, just like him, SC feels they are the same. And it doesn't even take much time for him to switch side- we can see him questioning everything onwards from from episode 4 during their first team dinner. And when he switches side he suddenly becomes so soft and caring- completely taking on the role of a possible love interest in both drama, romance and fairytale. Because he has seen the good in JW, saw the same suffering, this unfair treatment. He is a character not meant to grow alone but together and this togethes is only JW. JW still has HS by his side but in SC's world there was only JW who shows him all aspects of what it means to be a good human being. It's through him he grows.
Their shared journey:
To quote Leo Buscaglia again "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."
And isn't this what SC's and JW's shared bond is about? How they grow with and around each other- thanks to each other.
The little things SC does to make JW more comfortable, to show him love still exists? He takes him home without thinking twice because he's worried he might get sick when he could've taken him back to his house. He dresses him up in his clothes, let him sleep on his couch, in his blankets, gives him something warm to eat and drink (the glass of milk will never stop making me sob), showers him in touches and shows him warmth through them, always reaching after him because he's afraid something might happen to him, watches out for him, observes his reactions and waits for him. The little things JW does to SC- giving him a reality check that not everything is as it seems, graduately bringing back his old personality, stays by his side.
It's how SC brings JW's smile back and how JW brings SC's smile back. Its how SC not once but twice declares his worries, adoration and love towards JW: once when he's so worried sick JW might get hurt so he installs that app on his phone and the second time when they say their "goodbyes"- those words are so easy to read, so full of love. The "if you move" highlighting just how much he wants and hopes JW to stay in his life a little longer. It's longing and we can clearly hear it in his voice when he says "I'm sure you can" right after the monologue and then tilts his head. It's how JW doesn't know how to approach him after this, contemplating what to do and then goes on for the hug first. This is JW's way of showing his love.
And yet, despite it all there are still people who only see it as a bromance. Those who think JW and HS will end up together because they are at the same uni, study the same. And are a man and a woman. If either SC or JW would be a woman, no one would even bat an eye to think they aren't in love- no one would even come up with the idea to even ship JW and HS. If one of them was a woman, every little gesture would be seen as romantic, betting on it the drama would perhaps even be a lot more popular as well as the ship. It's so disheartening to see how many deny an obvious queercoding between them just because they are men and for the sake of a straight, not well manouvred, ship because again apparenlty many kdrama fans don't dare to ship queer.
We know Black Out/Snow white must die is a fairytale because it very much is just one of many iterations of a snow white and exactly because is one of many nothing is impossible and queerness is allowed to exist within it.
#so sorry it's so long and so unstructured#i was going through a lot when i wrote this haha#but i also love to write these specific analyses so yippe ig#honestly tho the more i think about it the more they are canon in my eyes (from an analysis standpoint alone)#might edit this post later but i wanted to get this all out if my head first before going to sleep#ignore all the grammar issues for the time being my head hurts 😭😭#백설공주에게 죽음을#black out#snow white must die
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I held him as the rain came and we laughed
#I want them to hug tenderly in the rai#batjokes#batman#joker#bruce wayne#I am very indecisive on what to post so take one that's a bit blurred and the other one that isn't#my brain would not let me rest till I changed it#very unhinged at night#I might die actually#not very good on the not thinking part when trying to sleep#my brain#pls let me rest now#might regret this in the morning#but the night is for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day#go#fly#be gay#gay#and happy gay#be gay and happu#no brain#gotta go to sleep bye#haha lol#nobody saw it right#right?#😳#thank gof#goodnight sleep tight#no bed bugs bls#I love you giys
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unwell
#clinging😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#WHY DO THEY DO THESE THIIINNNGGSSSSS#their friendship is my least favourite thing in this whole world. i wish they would die i want them to never see eachother again i hope#they’re never seen together again i want them away from everything i will mail them to the desert in their sleep i will throw big spikes at#them I will let them down I will Makethem Hurt You can have It a#odiespeak
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