#I usually don't like talking about politics but holy fuck

[iskra-ac1d-v0]

If trump wins im gonna kms

[coffeeghoulie]

PLEASE GIVE US DRAG TALK CONTENT

I’m going to post the ten pictures tumblr will allow and then go on a huge ramble under a read more bc goddamn i think this was the best weekend of my life.

Also, fuck tumblr bc I had this whole thing written out (on my phone, nonetheless) and it went poof up in smoke gone. Motherfucker.

I wore jutty’s own shirt to the first night bc I thought I was being funny. He walked past me and a few of my friends after the show, one of whom, Celine, runs the dt discord, and had gift bags for everyone in the band with trinkets from people who made things, myself included. She caught his attention and gave him the bags to distribute, and I was just shaking bc holy shit he just brushed past me in a crowded lounge and my hands were starting to shake (I was surprisingly okay during the show) I got his attention and gave him the bracelet I made for him that said "jutty taylor cyber bully" and he lit up when he I gave it to him and he smiled so fucking big when he noticed what shirt I was wearing.

He told me that he was happy the shirts were "getting new lives" but it still pained him to part with them lmao. I thanked him and explained that it was a "birthday gift" for myself; he did the fundraiser on my actual birthday. As soon as I said that, he pulled me into a side hug and I hit Celine with the biggest "deer in headlights about to be run over please send help" panicked expression lmao. He then proceeded to use my shoulder as an arm rest while he talked with Celine. I normally have an issue with people doing that to me, but I've said "anything for you, mr taylor" and I fucking mean it

I got a picture with him later and bc we were out of the cramped, loud bar, I was able to apologize about rambling in his twitter dms about losing my contact lenses and freaking out over the shirt potentially being lost. I did also get to tell him my name (he knows my legal name for shipping purposes) and told him that I didn't tell him that it was Dot earlier bc my parents and I share a po box and they don't know who Dot is. He turned to me and looked me in the eye and told me that he was very glad the shirt got to me.

When we took the picture, I swear to god, I could feel his stubble against my forehead where he leaned his head against mine and part of me will be on that street corner forever tbh. It's my phone lockscreen and I usually don't like looking at myself but holy fuck its proof it happened

I watched him smoke after the show both nights and ohhhhhhhhhh my god. It is now proven that I can in fact Behave In Public. It was an Ordeal. (you can't blame me, he threw his head back to blow smoke and furrowed his brow in concentration when he lit up. YOU CANT BLAME ME)

I did some touristy shit before the second show and impulsively bought jutty a novelty gift shop shirt to give to him afterwards. I watched him unfold it and just laugh when he saw the design. He thanked me up and down bc he actually needed a shirt and immediately left the group of people waiting to talk to him to put it somewhere he wouldn't lose it.

I am being dead fucking serious rn. I'm pretty much only on tumblr and discord. If a picture of jutty in a dark blue shirt with dinosaur skeletons on it surfaces somewhere online. DO NOT FUCKING TELL OR SHOW ME. I WILL ACTUALLY PHYSICALLY PASS AWAY. I GENUINELY MEAN IT.

Jutty was so nice and gave me a real hug after the second show when my uber was pulling up and I asked kind of quietly for one. He thanked me for coming pretty much in my ear and I just as politely and quickly as I could shoved my face into his collar and took a deep fucking breath and thanked him for everything. (i was also a lil distraught it was over and genuinely needed the hug tbh. i cried in the uber bc i was upset and also bc I was afraid I was being pushy again but I think I was just exhausted, if he didn't want to give me a hug he wouldn't have)

I cannot. CANNOT. even begin to explain how good jutty smells. He smells so fucking good. I think the dt twitter has said what cologne he uses, but once I assess the damage I just did to my bank account with this trip, I will be buying it.

I was able to give Hayden his bracelet after the first show, and he was super sweet and super animated when he talks and he got a little closer to my level (I am v short and it was very loud in that bar). I gave him a condensed version of my airport hell and that this one show had been worth it all, never mind tomorrow's; he seemed surprised people would fly out somewhere they've never been just to see the band. (He was reminded by a friend of mine that Australians flew out for the LA show lmao) But Hayden was super nice and so smiley, I wish I could have watched him play more at the second show but the stage was so small that Ross and the bassist who filled in for Eliot (whose name I'm drawing a blank on rn sorry 😭) stood right in front of him. He put his bracelet on the moment I gave it to him and I stood there shaking like "he likes itttttttt." WAIT SHIT I FORGOT TO SEE IF HE PLAYED WITH SHOES ON OR NOT. FUCK.

The band hung out at a sports bar after the first show, so me and a couple people hung out with Neil and he's super nice and so funny and showed us a peek at the yeti taylor merch that just dropped. He also stuck his head into the Vietnamese place next to the second venue and went "oops wrong door" lol

I didn't get much of a chance to talk to Ross or Matty, but Matty helped me get merch and Ross gave me a high five at the second show. Next time, mark my words, I will have a conversation or two with them, they were both so sweet.

I'm really glad I got to meet everyone who came, too. I got to meet a bunch of people I'd been talking to for months online and we were fucking troopers in line, dealing with the fuckass weather. Worth every second spent in soaked shoes imo. But it was so much fun and I still have to unpack but I am cherishing every little trinket I got.

I was incredibly nervous about being in a city I'd never been to alone, but I would do this trip again in a fucking HEARTBEAT. (i also said something along the lines of "pspspsps mr taylor could you please consider Chicago for next time mayhaps??? 👀👀👀 So Dot doesn't have to deal with flight cancelations and layovers and delays and midnight arrival times????" and he threw his head back and laughed and told me that Chicago is his kind of city so 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞)

[skz317cb97]

Valentine's Don't

Part 2

Bang Chan x Female reader

Word count: 8.1K

Synopsis: After your magical Valentine's date it seems as though Mr. Perfect ghosted you.

A/N: 18+ ONLY! I am sooooo sorry this took me so long. My ADHD has been kicking my ASS! I hope the fact that it's long makes up for it! If you enjoy reading give it a reblog, like, comment, hit me up in the ask box whatever I love talking to you guys. As per usual warnings and smut below the cut!

Warnings: 18+ ONLY MDNI, cussing/strong language, oral (m&f recieving), unprotected piv intercourse (please use condoms), rough sex (kind of), cream pie, cum play (a little), mc is turned on by the idea of him coming in her (if that's a warning?) I think that's it but if I ever miss anything please let me know and I'll add it to the warnings asap.

Just because you expected it didn’t make it hurt less. It had been two weeks since you’d gone on the most perfect Valentine’s date with Chris, and he hadn’t called or texted you. The voice in your head, the loud harsh one, started immediately and told you what you had feared all along, it was a pity date. The first few days when it would echo in your head you could drown it out with busy work or music. You told yourself to be patient it had only been a day or two or three. After the first week it got louder and by week two it was screaming and laughing at you.  

During those two weeks there were plenty of times your finger had hovered over Chris’ number debating on calling or texting him first, but you couldn’t make yourself. You couldn’t be the one to call first, surely asking him out for Valentine’s seemed desperate enough, making the first call or text when he said he would, you just couldn’t do it. Finally, you came to the conclusion that he was just a nice guy that gave you exactly what you’d asked for, a nice date with a cute guy for Valentine’s Day. He hadn’t even been obligated to do that let alone follow up, but after kissing and exchanging numbers you’d had a little hope of seeing him again.  

After two weeks of waiting and sulking your friend, who dragged you out the last time, talked you into drinks at the bar. You had agreed, not really thinking. Anything to get Chris and Valentine’s Day off your mind. You both frequented the bar often on weekends and karaoke nights. You’d gone there hundreds of times and not seen Chris, so the thought of possibly bumping into him there hadn’t even crossed your mind. You and your friend were a few drinks in talking about your work weeks when you noticed the band setting up to play. Your eyes scanned over the men hooking up instruments and then you saw Chris’ friend Changbin. 

Just as a realization was sinking into your brain you caught sight of Chris helping them. He finished hooking up a sound board and stood, stretching, a flash of skin showing when his shirt lifted, you could see a peek of his abs and the prominent line of his adonis belt. Your friend noticed you looking and glanced over following your line of sight. 

“Holy shit! That new guy with the band is fucking HOT!" Your friend exclaimed, causing you to jump in your seat and a few heads to turn, one of which was Chris. When he looked over in your direction your eyes met almost instantly. His went wide and you closed yours tightly, shaking your head as you spun in your barstool to leave. Your friend grabbed your arm to stop you  

“Hey sorry didn’t mean to embarrass you...” You tried to tell her it wasn’t her fault, you tried to pull away but before you could there stood Chris in front of you. You looked down at the floor. 

“Oh hello I’m...” Your friend attempted to greet him. Chris smiled, politely nodding and then turned to you as you still inspected the quality of the stitching on your boots. 

“y/n... I am so SO...” Your friend was more than a little surprised to discover that you two knew each other. You turned to leave again. The last thing you needed was to hear a pitiful sorry to pair with the obvious charity date he’d taken you on. If Chris wasn’t desperately trying to catch up and apologize he’d be impressed by your ability to quickly cut through the crowd. Your friend was a few steps behind him trying to figure out just what the hell was going on. Chris finally got within arm's reach of you and gently grabbed your shoulder. You whipped around quickly and it caught him off guard. 

“What Chris?!” He felt terrible, you were clearly very upset, rightfully so. 

“Was it not enough getting me to open up and be vulnerable, kissing me and then ghosting me? We absolutely need to have this awkward interaction as well?” He was speechless for a moment. 

“It’s fine Chris it was Valentine’s Day so, you know, I should have expected it, it’s always Valentine’s Day, isn’t it?” Chris’ heart ached hearing you say that. He stopped you speaking more forcefully when you tried to leave for the third time. 

“Wait PLEASE just hear me out and if you want to leave and never speak to me again after I swear, I’ll leave you alone.” You crossed your arms in front of you. 

“You have until the band starts and then I’m leaving.” He nodded in agreement. 

“Deal!” He went to grab your hand to lead you to a table so you both could sit and talk but you pulled your hand away. 

“Don’t.” He shook his head again. You and your friend both followed him over to the table where you and Chris slid into opposite sides of the booth. You turned to your friend. 

“Will you give me just a minute? I’ll meet you to head out right after I’m done here.” She nodded and decided it was a good opportunity for her to get a fresh drink. She excused herself and headed back over by the bar to give you a little privacy but still keep an eye on you in case you needed her. The guy was cute but he’d obviously hurt you which put him on your friend’s shit list. Back at the booth you were a bit calmer but the tension could still be cut with a knife. 

“y/n I’m so sorry.” You couldn’t look him in the eye, you watched your hands as you picked at your cuticles. 

“From the bottom of my heart I was not trying to ghost you.” You scoffed and managed to glance at him and roll your eyes before looking back at your hands. 

“Seriously! I swear I would never lead you on and then not call, I wouldn’t.” 

“So then why didn’t you?” The odds of you liking this answer weren’t very good but you still wanted an explanation. 

“The day after our date me and my mates in the band here went bungee jumping. I wasn’t thinking, my phone it was in my pocket and when the cord pulled at the end of my jump it went flying out into the river below.” You finally fully looked up at him with the most incredulous look on your face. Chris understood it sounded like bullshit but it was true. 

“Really! You can ask any of the guys, I was so distraught right after I lost it, they were teasing me. Look.” He slid his phone across the table showing you that it was in fact a brand new phone from the one you had typed your number into on Valentine’s Day. 

“I had to get a new phone; I usually update my contacts to the cloud but it had only been the day before so yours wasn’t saved yet. I swear I wanted to see you again, I want to see you again. I’ve been coming to the bar to help the guys set up almost every night they’re here hoping to bump into you. I thought it would be creepy if I showed up at your place, especially since you hadn’t called or text.” You nodded in understanding and looked down at your hands again. Chris took a chance; he reached out and covered your hands with his own. You looked up and he had a sad look on his face. 

“Why didn’t you ever call?” He asked sincerely. You were upset he hadn’t called so you must have wanted to see him again, but if that was the case how come you had never called or texted him either. His new phone was the same number, but he’d never heard from you. 

“I dunno. I didn’t want to seem clingy or any more desperate than I already did when I asked you out.” Chris’ brows creased. 

“Desperate? No, no I thought the way you approached me was so confident. My first impression of you was you were so funny and...well...” He looked at his own hands as they held yours. 

“sexy.” He said shyly. 

“I’ve missed you making me laugh, I’ve missed hearing yours, and I'd be lying if I said I didn’t miss kissing you too.” He squeezed your hands gently and you finally held his gaze. He had the biggest puppy dog eyes you’d ever seen. 

“Please y/n, give me another chance?” He chewed at his bottom lip as he waited for your answer. You moved your hands out of his grasp and he frowned a little until he saw you grabbing his phone off the table and typing your number into it. 

“If you lose this one skydiving that’s it.” Chris laughed and nodded, taking the phone back from you. 

“I’m gonna head out with my friend. I’ll talk to you.” His smile beamed. 

“You will. Promise!” You went and met your friend back over at the bar. You walked up by her and ordered a drink. She looked at you waiting. You really hoped she would just drop it and not ask questions but that was not in your friend’s nature to do. The bartender handed you your drink, you paid and quietly nodded thanking her. 

“What in the fresh hell was all that about?” You sighed heavily, took a sip of your fresh drink and started at the beginning glancing over at Chris and his friends from time to time. Stealing looks at his profile, his strong jaw and nose, the dimples that appeared when he laughed with one of his buddies, his pouty lips that you had tasted. 

“You bitch why didn’t you tell me!?” She smiled as she playfully smacked your shoulder.  

“Because it was crazy and I didn’t think he’d actually show up.” She shook her head. 

“Yea but he did and seems like he made quite an impression on you.” You took another sip of your drink and shrugged your shoulders. Even after his explanation, you didn’t expect much. You refused to get your hopes up just to have them dashed again. 

“He also didn’t call me. I don’t know, I guess we’ll see.” You told your friend as you finished your drink. 

“Let’s go home.” And see you did, because true to his word, Chris texted you the very next day. When you saw his name flash across your screen you couldn’t ignore your heart fluttering. He actually texted? You took a deep breath and opened the thread. 

Chris- Hey 😊 

You- Oh hey Chris 

Chris- Do you have any dinner plans tonight? 

You- Uh well no I don’t 

Chris- I know a really good Vietnamese place, best pho ever! Would you maybe want to go with me and take a walk by the canal? 

You still weren’t sure; you were hesitant to say yes. Your fingers hovered over your keyboard as you considered how to answer him. He had asked for a second chance and you had agreed, what was the point if you were only going to turn him down and not actually give him a second chance, especially when he was clearly trying. 

You- okay what time? 

Chris- I'll pick you up at 6:30? 

You- see you then 

Chris- can't wait 😊 

As soon as plans were made butterflies decided to flock to your stomach. You hurried and got busy with some work around the house to occupy yourself so you didn’t panic the whole time. About an hour before Chris was supposed to be there you took a shower and got ready. You had decided since you were going on a walk after dinner to just wear jeans, a sweatshirt, and tennis shoes. It was nothing fancy, you didn’t even bother putting make-up on really, some mascara and lip balm, and left your air-dried hair down. You started second guessing your choice of clothes the closer and closer it got to time. When Chris finally knocked on your door you were relieved to see he was also wearing jeans and a hoodie, along with a baseball hat turned backwards that stray curls turned up around the edge of. 

“Hey wow, you look great.” He smiled and leaned in kissing your cheek, gently grabbing your hand and squeezing it. 

“Oh... thanks, I didn’t really do much.” Chris shook his head. 

“You don’t need to, you’re beautiful.” You could feel your face burning and hoped Chris didn’t notice. You did what you always did when you were nervous. 

“Thank you. You look like a sexy grim reaper.” Chris laughed. 

“You think I’m sexy?” You pulled your door closed and turned around speechless. 

“Uh well, I mean...” He leaned in and kissed your cheek again.  

“I’m just teasing, come on let's get some food.” You let out a deep breath laughing and headed to the car. On the way to the restaurant, you couldn’t help but notice Chris was being very handsy. Not in an inappropriate or uncomfortable way just if he could have a hand on you, he did. On your back as you walked to the car, gently holding your arm as you got in, his hand through most of the drive sat comfortably on your knee.  

Once you got to the restaurant you were seated quickly, you placed your orders then you and Chris both talked while you waited. He showed you the pictures on his friend’s Instagram of their bungee jumping adventure including one of him looking over the rail of the bridge. The caption below said ‘Chris ready to jump without the cord after losing his phone’ You laughed a little and then saw the top comments on the photo. 

Chrispy97- I give a shit about the phone it was the number on it that was important! 

HanjiQuokka- We know you lost your girlfriend’s number, you whined about it for an hour. 

Darkbinnie- and every day since  

Chrispy97- 1. Fuck you both I didn’t whine 2. You’d have been whining too if you had met her. 

Your cheeks started to feel warm and Chris closed his phone quickly, his ears turning a bright shade of red when he realized you had seen his comments. Luckily for him your food was arriving at the table. A perfect distraction. It looked and smelled delicious. Sitting in front of you were two steaming hot bowls of noodles, fresh herbs, limes, bean sprouts, and a variety of sauces. You both started adding your choice of ingredients to your bowls and then just kind of started talking about your day as if it was the most normal thing, as if you did it every day. About halfway through your ginormous bowl of soup you tapped out. 

“If I eat anymore I’m gonna have to be rolled out of here in a wagon.” You didn’t think there was anything you liked hearing more than Chris’ laugh. You especially liked it when his laugh made his dimples appear and his eyes scrunch up and the unexpected little squeak that he made every time. 

“I’d have to agree, I think I’ve hit my limit. I’ll go pay and we’ll head down to the canal if you’re still up for it.” You shook your head, a walk after that meal was needed. If you got in his car right now, you’d fall into a coma. 

“I’m just gonna run to the bathroom quickly.” He nodded. 

“I’ll meet you out front.” Chris headed up to the register and you to the bathroom. You washed your hands and popped a mint in your mouth, then reapplied your lip balm and gave yourself a once over to make sure you weren’t wearing food in your teeth or on your clothes. After the all clear you headed out to meet Chris and headed down to the trail by the canal.  

The sun had gone down while the two of you ate and it had turned into a pretty beautiful night. You could see lots of stars and the moon was bright. Your sweatshirt was the perfect choice since it had gotten just a little cooler outside. Chris had grabbed your hand and held it pretty early on into the walk, his fingers laced through yours and squeezed and he continued walking as if it were nothing. Chris told you a little about when he was a dancer, he talked about his family and dog, his job and why he chose it over dancing in the long run. You stuck to telling him surface level stuff at first but Chris was good at pulling your layers away, peeling the onion that was your walls built up for protection and you really started to open up a bit to him.  

After your walk Chris drove you home. You both were sitting in his car in front of your place. You had talked through dinner and the walk and you still were chatting and laughing.  

“You look really beautiful tonight.” Chris said out of the blue once both of your laughter had died down. You could feel yourself blushing. You shook your head at him. 

“I’m just in a sweatshirt Chris, it’s really nothing special.” His hand came up and brushed the hair on your shoulder back as he looked into your eyes deeply. 

“Your clothes have nothing to do with it at all. God look at those eyes...” He admired aloud and you were definitely flushed and flustered as he leaned in closer.  

“And lips...” Chris closed the space between you and softly pressed his lips to yours. Your hands rested on his shoulders and slid up his neck until your fingers thread through the curls at his nape. You tilted your head and deepened the kiss as Chris cupped your cheek and nibbled at your bottom lip. You sighed and melted against him as his tongue teased and entered your mouth. You had never liked kissing someone as much as you liked kissing Chris. His lips were so soft, his kiss was slow and deep and made you a little lightheaded. You had been making out in his car for a good minute before you finally broke for a full breath of air, your foreheads pressed together as you both caught your breath. You wanted more.

“Um, do... uh... do you want to come inside?” You were surprised to hear it come from your own mouth and Chris looked to be equally surprised. His expression quickly morphed into one of endearment. His thumb softly grazed your cheek back and forth as he took a deep stabilizing breath. 

“I would love that y/n I would, but I think we should wait.” He pushed some stray hair out of your eyes. Your face fell as well as your hands away from him and into your lap. You wrung your hands that were suddenly the only thing you were interested in looking at. You felt so stupid suggesting it, you’d only been on two dates, why did that come out of your mouth. The voice was back telling you way to blow it. Chris saw the look on your face and the immediate change in your mood, he quickly jumped into damage control. 

“Hey believe me, I WANT to, okay? I really REALLY do but I also really like you and I want to give this a real chance, give us a real chance. Okay?” You swallowed the lump in your throat and shook your head. 

“Come on I’ll walk you up.” When you got up to your door Chris pulled you close to him by your hips and made you look into his eyes. 

“I’ll text you tomorrow, okay?” You shook your head and looked down again, still feeling a bit embarrassed. 

“Okay Chris.” He tilted your chin up, leaned in, and kissed you but he could tell something was still off.  

“I don’t like leaving you upset.” You shook your head. 

“I’m not upset Chris...” He was going to interrupt but you stopped him. 

“I’m not upset, I shouldn’t have suggested you coming in so soon and I’m just kind of... embarrassed.” Chris cringed. 

“I’m sor...” Now you interrupted. 

“Please don’t be sorry, you were the one thinking clearly. You want to take things slow and I agree we should. I understand and respect that so please don’t apologize for it.” Chris nodded and this time you leaned in and kissed him. It was soft, just plump lips pressed together. 

“Goodnight Chris.” You whispered against his lips. 

“Goodnight y/n.” 

At around eight am the next day your text notification went off. You had never grabbed your phone so quickly. It was Chris, of course it was Chris, telling you good morning, hoping you had a good day. From that point on you and him text good morning and good night every day. Even if it was a super busy day and you didn’t get to talk, you both still texted your good morning and good night. You had been on a few more dates as well.

Texting and talking to Chris was effortless and you wondered how that was possible. When you were together you tried to listen but felt like all you did was stare at him he was so beautiful. He did have this uncanny ability to get you to open up though. Maybe because he seemed so genuine, he was never putting on a front or trying to be someone he wasn’t. He was just Chris, ex dancer, foodie, and all-around good human being. As you got to know all these things about Chris, and him about you, you both felt something surmounting.  

The sexual tension between the two of you was building each time you saw each other. Lips and hands roamed the other, lingered longer. There was one heated make out session on your couch when you’d had a movie night. You were straddling Chris, his hands traveled up your shirt, you thought he was going to grab your breasts but they came to rest on your waist and his warm hands gently rubbed against your skin before trailing down. Two of his fingers toyed with the waist band of your pants, he gently ran them along the sensitive skin but they moved no further than that. Chris’ phone going off at full volume burst the little bubble the two of you were in that night. 

This particular night Chris had made all the plans down to the dress he bought for you. A dress... not typically something you would wear, but he had asked you to humor him, so you did. The dress was the only thing you had any idea about, he left you in the dark with the rest of his plan. The dress was beautiful, made with a flowy soft fabric cut tea length. The top had capped sleeves and buttoned up the front with a scoop neck. Since it was so soft and modest you felt very comfortable in it even though it wasn’t your usual choice in attire. When Chris got there you saw that he was wearing a black short sleeved button up shirt tucked into a pair of black slacks, his signature curls a little more kempt than usual. His shirt unbuttoned one or two lower than normal giving you a good glimpse of the lines of his firm chest. Chris whistled and took your hand holding it up for you to do a little twirl. 

“Damn baby girl. You’re stunning.” You did your twirl, your skirt twirling with you and gave him a curtsy when he complimented you. 

“You don’t look too bad yourself.” You pulled the front of his shirt open and peeked down, Chris swatted you away laughing, his ears turning red. 

“Hey hey hey.” You both laughed. 

“I was just curious.” He side eyed you with a smirk. 

“Come on we’re gonna be a little late.” You were about to ask just what you were going to be late to but before you could Chris’ hand was at your back ushering you to his car. It wasn’t long before you were pulling up to what looked like an abandoned building. Chris led you up a set of stairs, down a hall and then through a door into a brightly lit room. When your eyes got adjusted you realized you were in a dance studio with six other nicely dressed people. You stopped in your tracks making Chris stop too. Your eyes were big and you looked nervous.  

You looked nervous because you were. Your Valentine’s date had been the one and only time you had ever really danced. There were only three other couples, it was a small group, small enough for everyone to see you mess up and look like and idi... before your internal monolog got going Chris turned to you. 

“It’s okay, it’s nothing serious we’re just having fun. The steps don’t matter. Just follow me and feel the music, I’ll do the rest. Trust me okay? Do you trust me?” He squeezed your hand and you felt a little better, still nervous but able to function. You nodded. 

“I trust you Chris.” He winked, making you crack a smile then led you over to the group. It turns out they were all friends of his from his dancing days which made you feel a little better and more nervous at the same time. You knew they would be nice but it didn’t mean you wouldn’t embarrass yourself in front of them. One of the girls who’s dress was far more risqué than yours came up by you and Chris alone smiling. Chris was already rolling his eyes. 

“Heyyy Chris.” He waved half-heartedly. 

“Hey Cher.” She looked at him and then at you and Chris let out a huff of breath. 

“Cher this is y/n, y/n this is Cher, she’s...” She cut him off before he could finish the sentence. 

“His ex.” Chris rolled his eyes again and you were suddenly feeling very intimidated. This girl was gorgeous, and she had danced with and kissed Chris too, probably more. You felt a little queasy. Chris looked over at you and you looked pale. He squeezed your hand. 

“You okay?” You quickly snapped out of your tailspin of thoughts and shook your head. Chris walked you over away from the group to get some air. He said that you were just waiting for one more person to start, which confused you because that would make it an odd number of people, then Chris explained. 

“It’s Minho he’ll be the... instructor for the night.” One of the other guys back in the group groaned. 

“Oh god don’t let him hear you call him that, we’ll never hear the end of it and he’ll be Instructor Minho the rest of our lives.” Everyone laughed. Someone from behind the group spoke, halting the last of the chuckling. 

“I will now and forever be known as Instructor Minho.” Everyone groaned as you rejoined the group and the same guy from before nudged Chris. 

“Way to go Christopher.” Everyone laughed again and greeted the last member of the nights group. 

“Alright everyone, get your partner and take your positions.” Chris grabbed your hand and led you to one side of the dance floor and you didn’t miss Cher’s eyes following your every movement. Chris held your hands facing you. 

“Remember Valentine’s Day?” You shook your head and Chris put his hands on your hips. You followed his lead and put your hands on his shoulders just like you’d done when you were dancing on Valentine’s Day. Then Minho called out. 

“Okay we’ll start with the waltz.” Chris grabbed one of your hands and threaded his fingers through as Minho walked over and pressed play on the radio. You were nervously looking around trying to spot Cher and see if she was still staring and then Chris pulled you closer. 

“Step forward when I step back and back when I step forward, I’ve got you yea?” You smiled and nodded and the music started playing. You were a little stiff at first, but Chris just looked into your eyes and led you through the dance, twirling and spinning through the steps. The way your dress moved with the dance made it clear why Chris had chosen it. Before you knew it the song ended and Minho gave out his unrequested observations. He came to you and Chris last. Cher was already smirking. Minho looked at you and you braced yourself for the same scathing review he’d given the others but the sharpness of his features softened. 

“You started a little stiff but once you loosened up, towards the end it wasn’t too bad.” You let out the breath you had been holding as if this were some audition. Minho turned to Chris and his cat like eyes narrowed again. 

“Stick to your day job Christopher.” They all laughed except Cher this time and Minho walked back over to the radio. You did a couple more dances, each time Minho giving his expert opinion that no one really asked for and Cher staring through you and Chris. Then came the tango. Chris leaned in. 

“There’s a bit more spinning in this one, just stay loose. I won’t let you trip or fall.” You shook your head and looked into his eyes. 

“I know you won’t.” Chris smiled and kissed your cheek. Your face started burning as your eyes darted around to see if any of the others had seen that, if Cher had. They all seemed to be in their own bubbles though. The music started and Chris’ hips swayed with the rhythm, yours mimicking his. You took a few steps and Chris spun you out and then back in, his body pressed against yours. Suddenly you were nose to nose sharing the same air. Chris’ hand trailed down your arm and grasped your hand bringing it up to join the other on his shoulder, your fingers threaded together around his neck as his hips moved in tandem with yours. Every move you felt more of his firm body pressing against you, his hands gripping your hips firmly and you could feel yourself starting to overheat. The music ended with you out of breath but not just from the dancing. 

“Alright alright enough of this stuffy formal shit, let’s have some fun!” Minho flipped a switch and half the lights went off. He pressed something else and different colored lights started spinning around the room, when he hit the button on the radio again some r&b song started playing. Chris pulled you off towards a corner away from everyone else for a little privacy. When he faced you he pulled you close and wrapped his arms around you. You rested yours on his shoulders, your fingers twirling pieces of his curls and you both just moved together no counting, no steps just your bodies pressed together swaying. One of Chris’ hands came up and cupped your cheek, then his lips were pressed to yours and you melted. No one else in that room mattered at that point not even Cher, kissing Chris was the only thing happening, the only thing that mattered. 

“I’ve wanted to do that all night.” You smiled, your foreheads pressed together. Chris adjusted a bit somehow pulling you closer and his thigh was suddenly between your legs your skirt draped over his leg. Both his hands on your hips again guiding you to move against him. You clenched at the idea of riding that strong thigh and you wonder if he felt it. When the music finally stopped you were blushing, breathless, and a little sweaty. Minho’s voice cut through the silence and you both snapped out of it. 

“Is there a bathroom I can use?” You whispered. You needed to splash a little water on your face and cool down a bit. Chris shook his head and showed you where the bathrooms were just outside of the doors you’d walked through, Cher watched intently. In the bathroom you ran the cold water and dabbed a damp paper towel across your face and neck. You felt better immediately, you were getting hot from dancing and the tension between you and Chris, which always lingered, was more prevalent than ever that night. You were willing to wait as long as he wanted but it was getting harder and harder to not touch him in every way and everywhere that you wanted.  

You tossed the paper towel in the trash and headed out to meet back up with Chris. You pushed the door open, walked out into the dark hall and you were met by two people. As your eyes adjusted to the dark hall you realized it was two people kissing, one of the couples must have snuck out into the hall for a little privacy. 

“Oh! Sor-” You went to excuse yourself and once you could see clearly you saw Chris and Cher standing there inches apart now facing you. Your eyes went wide and you couldn’t stop the whimper that left you. 

“Sorry to interrupt.” You choked out. You bowed your head and walked off with tears welling in your eyes. Chris pushed Cher off of him.   

“y/n wait!” He went to go after you and Cher stopped him.  

“Sabotaging my relationship isn’t going to make me get back together with you so get over it already Cher. Fuck!” Chris turned and started after you. You burst out the front door onto the street and took a deep breath of the cool night air. Tears were still streaming down your face as you looked around. That’s when you remembered Chris had driven you there and you had no idea where to go. Chris came rushing out the door just a minute or two after you. He was relieved when he found you. 

“Oh thank go-” You backed away from him and he stopped. When he saw your face tear streaked, your eyes puffy and red his heart broke. 

“y/n...I swear that wasn’t what you think.” You turned to walk away and Chris ran and blocked you. 

“Please listen! I didn’t even know she was going to be here tonight.” You turned and started walking in the opposite direction. 

“Well, whether you knew or not, clearly you have unfinished business so...” Chris ran around and blocked you again gently gripping your shoulders this time. 

“She might, I don’t. The day I found out she was cheating on me I was done. She’s hoping for something that died a long time ago.” You looked at him with tears in your eyes and he continued. 

“y/n you’re who I want. I was waiting for you to come out of the bathroom. Cher came out of the studio and when you walked out she threw herself on me and kissed me. I’m so sorry I never meant for any of this to happen I just wanted to plan a special date because you deserve our first night to be special.” 

“Our first what?” You asked. 

“I planned all of this with the hope of us spending the night together and now it’s ruined, she ruined everything.” You stood there speechless and Chris sighed. 

“Come on I’ll take you home.” He walked towards his car and opened the passenger door for you. You walked over and stood in front of him. 

“We don’t have to let her ruin it if we don’t want to.” You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and kissed him. Chris was caught off guard at first but quickly deepened the kiss. He held you and kissed you with so much passion it took your breath away. His tongue invaded your mouth and he pulled you closer, his hands roaming down your body stopping on your ass. Chris squeezed and you couldn’t help the moan that escaped you. He started kissing down your jaw and neck and you thread your fingers through his hair tilting your head back as he ravaged you. He finally forced himself to remove his lips from your skin, both of you panting and blushing, you chewing at your bottom lip. 

“We need to get out of here before I... well... just... we should go.” Chris helped you into the car. You giggled at him as he then ran around and got in, taking off towards your house post haste. When you got home Chris walked you up to your door. You unlocked and opened it, then turned to Chris. The car ride had been filled with comfortable silence and the radio was softly playing, underneath the both of you were buzzing with anticipation though. Now you stood in front of each other in that same silence, that same tension until Chris finally broke it. 

“Look I just wanna say, about Che-” He started but you kissed him cutting off what he was saying.  

“You don’t have to explain. Forget her.” You kissed him again. 

“Forget who...” He joked and you laughed. Chris held your face, his palms rested against your cheeks, his thumbs gently grazing your skin. Then he kissed you and backed you through your open doorway, hungrier than he’d ever kissed you before, his hands running down your body. He closed your front door by turning and pushing you against it. He was rough but gentle at the same time somehow. He lifted you and your legs wrapped around Chris’ midsection, his hands firmly gripping the back of your thighs under your bunched up skirt, holding you up as his lips left a wet trail down your neck and chest. 

“God you’re so beautiful,” He whispered against your skin, his lips unwilling to part from your body. 

“So beautiful.” His lips were on yours again devouring you little by little. You ran your fingers through his curls and gently tugged earning a low growl deep from his chest. 

“Fuck Chris if you keep making noises like that you’re gonna end me.” He laughed and his warm breath spread across your skin. He started unbuttoning the top of your dress as he sucked a mark under your ear. 

“Is this okay, tell me if I’m moving too fast...” You stopped him. He stood there wrapped in your legs, dress half open, hickey getting darker on your neck by the minute. You ran your hands down his chest, grabbed his shirt and ripped it open, buttons flying across your foyer. You pulled his sleeves down and tossed his shirt aside. When you got a glimpse of his firm body unobstructed your mouth practically watered for him. You only had one request. 

“Don’t stop.” Chris kissed you again as he unfastened the rest of your buttons exposing the pretty lace bra you had on underneath. The top of your breasts were spilling out of the cups. Chris pressed you more firmly against the door with his hips, his hard on pressing against your throbbing center. His hands gripped your breasts over your bra squeezing them before pulling the cups down and exposing your hard nipples. His mouth was wrapped around one and you gripped his curls with both hands as your head tilted back against the door. His mouth felt amazing, he only let go of the one nipple to suck on the other. 

“Chris mmmplease...” He looked up at you, his eyes were dark and lust blown, you’d never seen him so ravenous. 

“Please what baby girl, tell me what you want.” You pecked his lips softly and looked at him with big wanting eyes. 

“Take me to bed Chris.” His heart swelled and he kissed you, his lips gentle, not rushed in the slightest anymore. He turned and headed towards the hall to your room, carrying you with your legs still locked around his torso. Once you were by your bed Chris put you down and as soon as your toes hit the ground you immediately pulled the shoulders of your dress down and let it pool around your feet. You stood in front of Chris in cute matching lace panties and bra. His mouth dropped and he could feel his cock straining against his briefs.  

“Holy shit.” You, in a sudden burst of bold energy, reached for Chris’ fly and started to unbutton his pants. The way the lines of his firm muscles trailed into those pants made you eager to get them off and see just what they led to. When Chris’ fly was open you leaned in and kissed him as you slid your hand inside his pants and felt his length over his underwear. You gave him a gentle squeeze and felt him twitch in your hand as he groaned. 

“Fuck that feels good...” You hummed and started stroking him over the fabric. 

“Chris?” He made himself open his eyes and look at you while you still rubbed his cock. 

“Can I suck you off?” He was surprised by your request. 

“You want to?” You gave him a small nod. 

“I do, I want to taste you Chris, want to make you feel good.” He got a little lightheaded just thinking about your sweet lips wrapped around his cock. 

“Fuck okay baby girl yea, if you want to.” You got down on your knees in front of him and pulled down his pants and briefs. When his erection sprung free from its confines he grabbed it and started stroking with one hand and gently rested his other in your hair. You licked your lips to wet them and then they were on Chris’ cock and he thought he may actually malfunction. He gently gripped your hair as you took more of him into your mouth. 

“Yes, so good, just a little more.” The tip of Chris’ dick hit the back of your throat and you gagged pulling off, a little string of spit following. You stroked his cock as you looked up at him. 

“It’s so big! Mmm...” You took him into your mouth again and started bobbing up and down, your tongue flat pressing on the bottom of his cock. Every time the tip rubbed against your tongue he shuttered. Chris gathered your hair into a ponytail to keep it out of your face, he had to watch you as his dick disappeared into your mouth over and over while you sucked and hummed in satisfaction. He groaned. 

“It feels so fucking good baby, does it taste good?” You looked up at him nodding and humming as you continued sucking and Chris honest to god thought he was going to cum. 

“You’re so pretty when you look up at me like that baby girl.” He gently ran the back of his hand down your cheek as you continued looking into his eyes while you went down on him. 

“So pretty. Come here beautiful.” Chris pulled you up and kissed you. His hands made quick work of your bra and panties, and he laid you back on your bed. He ran his hands up your thighs and spread your legs apart. He looked up at you and raised one of his perfectly arched eyebrows at you silently asking permission which you granted in the form of a small nod. That was all Chris needed and his face was buried between your legs eager to repay you the pleasure you had just been giving him. 

“Oh my god! Chris!” He had you going zero to a hundred really quick. You clamped your thighs around his head but that only egged him on. The way he just knew where to lick what to suck when to hum, he knew what he was doing. 

“Chris... I’m... FUck...” You gripped his curls and tried not to pull too hard as you came on his tongue. Waves of pleasure lapping at you as Chris did. Chris crawled up and caged you in is arms. He nuzzled against your cheek and then softly kissed it. 

“You’re even prettier when you cum baby girl.” You finally were able to open your eyes and look up at him. His eyes almost sparkled as he looked down at you and it made your heart swell. You kissed him soft and sweet and he smiled as you pushed him to sit back against your headboard. You climbed in his lap and his hands instantly found your ass and squeezed. 

“You’re gonna ride it?” You bit your lip and nodded. Chris squeezed your ass again pulling you forward so your pussy grazed across his cock and he could feel how soaked you were for him. Then you lined him up with your entrance and slowly started sitting on Chris’ cock. When he was buried deep inside you there was a collective gasp from the both of you. 

“S-so so bii-big, feels s-so good.” Chris got himself together so that he could speak again. 

“It’s big baby girl? You take it so well.” You rolled your hips feeling him rub deep inside you. 

“Fuck! Do that again oh my god!” Chris moaned out and you rolled your hips again, you could feel your clit rubbing against him and Chris groaned out again. The sounds he made were so pretty, like music to your ears you rolled them again and this time Chris growled and sat up wrapping an arm around you, pushing you all the way down on his cock roughly and kissed you. 

“You trying to make me cum inside you? Is that what you want baby girl?” You shook your head no but the look on your face said otherwise. You did, you wanted to feel his warmth all over in everyway. You wanted him to cum deep inside you. He wrapped your legs around him and laid you back on the bed again still buried deep inside you. 

“I’ll give you my cum if you want it but there’s one thing you need to know.” He leaned down and kissed you as he gave you a deep thrust making you moan out. 

“Whaaat...” He kissed you again and then whispered against your lips. 

“Once I fill you up, you’re mine.” You clenched around his cock when he said that. Chris sat up and grabbed a hold of your hips for leverage. He looked down at you panting and blushing underneath him. He thrust in and out a couple of times testing the waters so to speak and then his pace quickened and he pushed harder, deeper. He licked two fingers and played with your clit as he fucked you raw. 

“Chris’ it’s so big god feels so good! Fuck me! Fuck me harder!” He leaned down, caging you in his arms and did just that. 

“Good girl yes, fuck so pretty, taking my cock so well, you want it hard I’ll give it to you hard baby girl.” He started to rail you, your legs wrapped around him rocking into him at his rhythm, taking him whole, taking him hard. 

“Let go baby let go for me.” His panting whisper of a plea in your ear sent you teetering into your second orgasm of the night and while the other was like waves this was a tsunami. It took you out entirely. All you could do was hold onto Chris solid body, wrapped around him as he continued fucking you harder chasing his own release. 

“You gonna let me fill you up baby girl? Fu-fuck you’re gonna take my cum yea?” You moaned out his name still riding the high of your orgasm. 

“Chris!! Fuck yes give it to me, I’m yours fuck it deep want all of you inside me.” Chris sat up and pulled his hips flush with yours burying himself to the hilt, holding you down on his cock as he came deep inside you. 

“Fuck! Oh god fuck I’m coming baby.” You were coming down finally and started squirming a little still trying to find some friction. 

“Aht aht baby girl be good and hold still while I give it to you.” Chris thrusted deeper as his seed got pushed further inside you. When he was spent he fell over next to you on the bed gasping for air and laughing a little, giddy from the head buzz from his orgasm. You reached over and stroked the head of his cock making him twitch from overstimulation. A bead of cum leaked from his tip and you leaned down licking it off. Chris’ whole body shuddered. He looked at you eyes slightly narrowed playfully. You ran your fingers through your slit and rubbed the cum leaking from you against your clit and then sucked your fingers. 

@acciocriativity @caroline-ds-world @chansynie @ughbehavior @jquellen27 @hyunelixies @fixation-dump @lachinitaaaaaa @rinrinndou @bangchans-angel @laylasbunbunny @owo-manii-uwu @armystay89 @b00dyguts @purplenimsicle @caticorn61 @lauraneuuh @channieandhisgoonsquad

“Fuck baby girl give me fifteen minutes. Since you wanna taste my cum so bad I’m gonna unload in that pretty mouth next.” 

Please do not repost or translate any of my works. My blog and stories are NSFW and 18+ ONLY! Minors, ageless, and blank blogs will be blocked!

[overrgrown]

stray my stand in thoughts in no particular order (e1-7 spoilers) ~

sorry it's long lmao I have a lot of jumbled thoughts that I need to yell about so this is me screaming into the void

Joe being used as a stand in by ming and tong is very telling

ming honestly doesn't act like a spoiled rich brat. he's occasionally entitled, but he's very polite to staff and he genuinely cares for his sister.

I don't think that ming wants to hurt his sister. he wants tong to choose him instead of his sister so that he can break her heart instead and then ming isn't to blame

idk if ming was ever trying to be subtle to Joe about what he was to him. he flat out told him he was a stand in (just didn't mention for who)

Joe getting a second chance at a maternity figure only to have her immediately fall into major trouble and then health issues has got to be triggering the fuck out of Joe rn

do we find out where Joe 2.0's spirit is at all? and what happened to OG Joe's body??

jfc poom is so pretty I can't focus

ik sol and ming are more than likely gonna become friends at some point but my messy ass would LOVE to see them be bitter bitches to the end with each other

where did ming get the chain....?

it's making me so fucking sad that Joe is falling back into his previous direct footsteps bc of his situation and its literally all he knows to do. same people, same habits, same mannerisms, same career, everything

he has an opportunity to completely rebrand and live his life without being under ming's thumb but he is consciously choosing to stay around him. why? what is so alluring about the person who used and emotionally cheated on you for who knows how long and then drunkenly called you the target of his actual affections????

Joe is not only too humble. I think he genuinely doesn't think he deserves better. this life is all he's ever known and he's never had the stones to try and improve himself and get his own life

his job is literally to be a nameless, faceless body double who does the work for a person who gets to take all the credit

(not that I'm shit talking real stunt doubles. y'all are the core of my fave action movies and ily)

but it says a lot about Joe's character and how passive he is usually and it's so interesting to me that he's the big risk taker when it comes to his stunts but he's too scared to make a move to improve his life or branch out on his own

those inconsiderate little bitches. you can't just add a character willy nilly to an already finished script. it'll throw off the whole movie and that's way more work for the writers

yo that hesitation at Joe not being able to break those mugs???? I felt it physically that was GOOD FUCKING ACTING

sol has never done anything wrong in his life he could murder someone in front of me in cold blood and I would help him cover it up

I would come out to sol i trust him with my party drink I'll go to war for him

damn bro how the hell did Joe get roped into being a stand in for HIMSELF that's some meta shit right there. like how is this not just self harm bc that's what it seems like to me

tharn? that's a new name. will we meet him?

ming's condo being green and gold like Joe's old house I am chewing on fucking concrete

OH THE MIRROR SWIPE THE HARSH REMINDER THAT HE IS IN ANOTHER BODY AND THAT HE IS USING THAT BODY AS A STAND IN FOR HIMSELF AND THAT HE NOT ONLY SOLD HIMSELF TO MING BUT HE SOLD JOE 2.0'S BODY GOD THAT WAS *chefs kiss*

is the backception here that ming is kissing Joe 2.0's back bc it reminds him of OG Joe or because it reminds him of Joe reminding him of tong hmmmmmmmmm either way: seek help babe you have a problem

the juicy juicy parallel of ming waking up to an empty pillow I'm gulping this shit down like water this is my life blood rn thank you for the delicious meal

i am not immune to the mesh shirt

AHA I THINK I JUST MET THARN

Update: I am correct

JOE'S ACCIDENT WAS A SUICIDE ATTEMPT?!?!?!?!? holy fuck bro

I thought I was going to hate ming a lot more when I started this bc I have a lot of manipulation trauma but I kind of.... get him

how old is tharn supposed to be bc he looks 16 and it's unsettling

I knew we couldn't trust that twink

YAS BABE YOU LOSE YOUR SHIT YOU YELL YOU GET MAD YOU TELL PEOPLE TO FUCK OFF YOU KICK THARN OUT OF YOUR ROOM DESERVE TO UNHINGE YOURSELF A BIT

ming is about to step off the edge I can feel it this man is about to overflow and drown everyone around him in his search for Joe

"tOng PlaYed tHe scENe hImsELF" oh so tong has always been a piece of shit got it

shut the fuck up why am I actually getting emotional over ming realizing that his Joe is the one in front of him and that it's been him all along

but on another note I am going to pound him into the cement for interrupting that shoot I hope the footage wasn't ruined by ming's emo ass

the back hug with the clear JOE though and comparing it to their first meeting?? stupendous no notes

up is going in a bubble I am kissing his forehead he acted the fuck outta that last scene MWAH

[pinkvaquita]

Can we talk about the whole flirty thing that happened between Smoked Cheese and Mozzarella cookie??? IS JUST, OMG IS JUST SO OBVIOUS.

Obviously, spoilers under the cut and all the screenshots are from Royal Mike.

Like, the first time they talked alone, when Mozzarella was telling him that he was right and she was gonna help him, but specially with THIS line:

Like, SHE KNEW WHAT SHE WAS DOING. Mozzarella talked politely and calm before, trying to make him see she was on her side, BUT THEN SHE SAID THIS IN SUCH A FLIRTY VOICE. She waited for the perfect moment to seal the deal with that. She knew she was gonna win him by that telling him: "I like you more than our queen". AND SHE WAS SO DAMN RIGHT.

He felt as hard as a fucking rock in her trick, and not only that:

"I'll show you something very interesting... "

OOOOOOH HOLY FUCKING SHIT

THE TONE, THE TENSION, THE FACT THAT THE NEXT ESCENE WAS MOZZARELLA IN A BLACK BACKGROUND MAKING IT LOOK LIKE THEY WERE DOING WHO KNOWS WHAT THINGS BEHIND SCENE.

I am the only one thinking this like they were talking this super close to each other because of "being a secret"? JUST IMAGEN THIS FOR A SECOND WITH THAT IN MIND.

And then we have the next time this two were alone. When Mozzarella decided to do her trick with the Marzipans. Smoked Cheese was out of his head. But the second, THE SECOND he hears Mozzarella talking him like a loyal follower

He is GONE for some seconds, he gets a bit calmer and he has to THINK TWICE before letting himself trust blindly her words. Is not an automatic response, it takes him EFFORT.

Hell yeah girl, WALK HIM LIKE A DOG.

... Well, owl. Walk him like and owl.

But what I'm meaning here, is that this two had a lot of chemistery together. MOZZARELLA LITERALLY HAS HIM AROUND HER FINGERS. And don't tell me this doesn't make you considera that this hasn't happened before.

Like, Smoked Cheese is described to have this kinda if ideas before. So maybe it would be a usual idea of Mozzarella to stop him before he goes crasy like this. Not only in the simulation, but also before in their first life?

[intertexts]

OK OK SINCE U ARE PRETTY FAR INTO PD NOW. I NEED TO ASK. DO U HAVE A FAVORITE CHARACTER. do u have a favorite moment. whos backstory are u the most interested in seeing. what are u excited to learn about the world . I AM PUTTING UR BRAIN UNDER A MICROSCOPE AND DISSECTING IT IVE GOTTA KNOW. what villains are u most afraid of. write me an essay on ur feelings about mark winters. etc etc etc etc WHATEVER U WANNA TALK ABT RN im standing in the middle of a field like a scarecrow and just SCREAMING at the sky

OHHHHHH MAN DUDE LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO CHOOSE A FAVORITE OF ANYONE. FUCKK. GOD.

ok putting all of this under a cut because its so fucking long???

ok ok ok. lets see. they r all so so so good it's impossible 2 choose but also iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii really fucking like dakota dude..... i like him so much. so much. i will admit. i am a massive fucking fan of a character who stays silly. massive fucking fan of the emotional king dedede hammer that comes down when the silly guy drops the silliness. i love it when characters literally r incapable of processing their emotions. gebuinely i don't know what he put in that guy but it is cartoonish the way my neurons light up at him its not quite akechi from p5 levels of FUCKKK YEAH THIS GUY MY FUCKED UP LITTLE GUY!! but it is Getting Close!!!

whose backstory.... fuck. okay. Most interested in wiwi's backstory. of course. i AM really interested in vyncent's whole deal but i feel like his fucked up knife that possesses him (?????????) is slightly more of a specific thing than backstory. and i DO wanna know howww the jrpg protag isekai'd here but also like. consider... wiwi. also i wanna know if im right & ashe/ashes fucked up demon grimoire r responsible for his mom's death. ALSO I WANNA KNOW WHY MARK'S A LIZARD GUY.

FAVORITE MOMENTS SO FAR.... i LOVED the spirit world shit it was all so cinematic it was so lovely. usually im dogshit at like, visualizing descriptions in my head? but all of that was very much oh, yeah for sure, ive seen this cartoon! i know whats happening! that whole episode went hard as fuck. can't believe we got vyncent with a gun ashe going holy shit why am i fucking doing this imgonnadie william having a horrifying crisis over eating a fucking soul & dakota getting murked in one episode. & mal is just. on just. such a different level such a different world from Anything else they've experienced. its so good.

also i still really love the winding-down end of that amalgam island ep (5?) where they r exhausted & coming off so many huge emotions & stress & stuff & tide arrives.... that's really the scene that fucking hooked me i think. going ohhh yeah theyre just fucking kids and everyone at this table Knows theyre kids in a world where people will just fucking kill you. like,, yeah, it WOULD be fucked up if you were seventeen and ran into an island full of horrifying human and animal experimentation & abuse!! and theyre not playing it as a motw adventure where its just sillygoofy? ok. ok!! maybe these guys know where theyre taking it. like i can count on one hand maybe the amount of times ive been like "yeah im sure whatever the creators do will be good they've always done good & thoughtful work. i don't have to continually be delegating brain space to how im dissatisfied with this story." so i guess. i just like the show a lot!!

what am i most interested in about the world... ohhh man i love cape worldbuilding it's maybe like one of my favorite things. so i guess i'm interested in All of It?? in an overall probably-wont-be-answered-because-its-not-that-genre way i'd love 2 know what religion looks like in a world where JESUS IS A TRADEMARKED SUPERHERO & kids can come back from the dead. id love 2 know more ab the dynamic btwn politics & the cape world here thats always interesting? i really enjoy the approach they took 2 the kid heroes in the beginning, as in: these guys are literally still students they are not Supposed to be doing big hero shit. theyre not supposed to be doing teen titans or x-men shit & it is in fact a massive massive fuckup on their guardian's part when they Are in those positions. i'm a big fan of that i like it a lot more than the alternative. (unless yr like in a world like parahumans where there Is a narrative & in-universe reason why child & teen cape teams exist)

what villains am i most afraid of....... ok i kind of feel like being afraid of mal is like, being afraid of hurricanes or something. like sure i can be nervous about him but i can't fucking do anything if he's coming this way. so it's better i think to not think about it until it comes up & then pray. so i guess i AM really concerned about the overlord stuff. i dont know where it's gonna go but i know it'll be nowhere good & i know it'll end up getting people hurt. so.!!!!!!

[peefartress2]

frederick wakes up in a bedroom just like his. he takes in the details once he blinks a few times, processing the new surroundings of the room: his own is so bare that the library feels more his room then the bedroom.

he knows something is wrong when he sees books in his room. frederick jolts out of bed, warily reaching out to trace the spines of the books in a shelf that was not there before. there's history books, books on politics and government. things he considers boring- yet, on his bedside table there is a book on wartime preparations. he may have not exactly let go of fairytales, but that didn't mean he immediately converted himself into a nonfiction purist.

everything else seems the same, except for the things that aren't. his closet is the same, but his desk is not. there's notebooks and open books, and plans and records. the last thing frederick remembers doing there is reading the dogyssey and falling asleep.

what is going on?

if that wasn't enough to tip him off, breakfast definitely was. his mother was absent; but nobody commented on it, so he didn't ask about it.

even in whatever universe this was, the "last one to dinner has to do push ups" rule remained a constant. and that happened to be frederick.

"you're slower than usual, son," said leland, a jovial tone. "are you being overworked? do you need more time off?"

"uh," frederick is unsure how to respond to that. there's a lot to take in there, but he knows leland, and knows what he usually wants to hear. "...no?"

"good. so i can except those plans this week? with counsel from our generals, of course,"

frederick has no fucking clue what he's talking about. "umm... yeah!"

the conversation over breakfast takes a turn. lance jokes around and steals food from his plate, which is fairly normal. what's off this time is blaine, who is joking around with frederick. in all seventeen years of his life, frederick swears that has never happened.

"hey, frederick," blaine said. he seems happy, which is weird, cause when is blaine ever not annoyed or on edge? "we'll see you at practice today, right?"

frederick numbly agrees, because it seems that's all her can do today.

he walks around, observes the changes in the palace. it's more fortified, more dark, more guarded. the decorative sets of armor don't seem so decorative anymore, but like they were guards that could spring to life any moment.

he comes across a huge portrait in the hall. he recognizes leopold's painting style from lance's birthday party, but... frederick couldn't ever imagine leopold painting something like this. though it does capture the gloomy expressions perfectly...

it dawns on him on what the portrait is. who is the portrait is of. king leland and his sons; even laverne, dressed even more extravagantly than normal. leland looks grim, dark and serious. dare frederick says: straight up murderous. his sons are wearing their colors proudly, backs straight and chins up as they glare into the distance. medals and badges decorate their sashes... and frederick is among them, holding what seems to be a book. lance holds a sword, and blaine holds a shield with their family's crest.

his mother is not with them.

frederick is astounded- and when he backs up, he notices more and more portraits. he wanders closer to one of them, and sees the words "siege of the pastel kingdom" on a small plaque underneath. the painting is of his father standing dramatically before the pastel palace. many guards have fallen around him, while his foot is planted on king jack's unconscious. he's... probably sleeping.

and holy shit frederick is scared. this was supposed to be home? no, this was enemy territory- and he was right there with them- was he the enemy? what happened to everyone? what happened to gwen?

"ay, lil bro!" it's lance's voice. "courtyard's this way!"

could he trust lance? lance took a part of this too- was he the same lance? good-natured and excitable and sometimes not so bad. cooler than blaine, in frederick's opinion. his older brother lance.

"i'm with you," frederick called out after him, his throat feeling dry. he jogged through the echoey hall.

outside was startling. it was grey and dull; probably just how his father liked it. lance and blaine's attitudes highly contrasting the scenario frederick found himself in.

there's once thing he knows for certain: he needs to find out what's going on.

[waltwhitmansbeard]

oh my god, you're covered in blood. In Vamp Machina? ^_^

oh my god, you're covered in blood. this is the au. based on this ask.

Keyleth doesn't normally make deliveries, but Zahra is worth the exception. She's become quite the loyal customer since her move to Emon, and she enjoys her dry sense of humor. It's worth the twenty minute detour on her walk home to deliver her usual dried aconite and Keyleth's signature calming tea blend of chamomile, peppermint, and rosehips.

She follows someone into his building, then take the stairs to the second floor, where she knocks on the door labeled 2D. "Delivery!"

There's some shuffling inside, a chaotic fumbling, and then a familiar, "Uh, not a great time!"

She frowns. That's Kash's voice, she's sure of it. He's come in with Zahra a handful of times, and he's peppered Keyleth with quite a few questions about her work. "Kash, it's Keyleth! From the herbalist's? Zahra didn't pick up her order today, so I just thought I'd drop it off for her."

There's a pregnant pause, followed by a strained, "Leave it at the door, please."

Something's not right. He's an odd one, Kash, but he's not usually this...cagey. She bends down to set the paper bag just up against the door, but she knows this nagging feeling isn't ever going to leave her alone, so she tries the doorknob. "Kash?"

It's unlocked, which is weird in and of itself, so she pushes inside, hoping to help a friend in distress.

.

At this point, slipping in through Keyleth's bedroom window is old hat for Vax. He'd prefer to walk in through the front door—it's degrading, sneaking around like he's a teenager and not well into his second century—but an encounter with her bitchy vampire hunter roommate is not what he needs right now. He stretches out on her bed, thumbing through a trashy romance novel she checked out from the library as he waits for her to get home.

He's so engrossed in the surprisingly complex political plot line of this bodice ripper that he almost doesn't hear her enter the room. It's the soft snick of the door shutting behind her that pulls his attention away from the book. "Hey, this is actually pretty good once you get past—holy fucking shit."

Her face scrunches up as her hands start to flap in his direction. "Quiet! I don't want Percy to hear."

Vax launches himself to to his feet. "You're worried about Percy? Keyleth, you're covered in blood."

She sighs, as if his pointing it out is an inconvenience for her. "Yes, I am." She shuffles over to her closet and begins rummaging around.

He feels like the back of his head is going to explode. It's all over her, caked onto her arms, splashed up into her hair. He can smell it, rich and warm and sweet and hers. He swallows thickly. "Do you care to share why?"

She pauses, her back to him. "No." She continues to pull out a change of clothes.

Well into his second century, and he's never met someone as inscrutable as her. "Keyleth, fuck, are you hurt?"

He knows the quiet no is a lie before she says it. There's a stiffness to her movements, a tenderness clearly borne of pain. He comes up behind her, put his hands over hers to stop their movement. "Keyleth." She looks at him, exhaustion seeping into every corner of her face. "Please, talk to me."

He can see them now, a few slash marks through the sleeves of her denim jacket, the source of all of the blood. His heart hasn't beat in many decades but he swears he can feel it racing now, feel its roaring fury in his chest. "Who did this to you?" He tries to keep the trembling rage from his voice, but he knows he fails.

"It was an accident."

"That's not an answer."

"Look, it looks a lot worse than it is, okay? I promise." She puts her hands on either side of his face, and for a moment, he must hold his breath to keep out the delicious aroma of her blood on her skin. "You trust me to keep your secret, yeah?" He nods; he trusts her with every dead bone in his body. "Then trust that other secrets are just as worth keeping."

His teeth long to tear into something, to rend someone's flesh for this. "Are you saying another vampire did this?"

She snorts. "Definitely not." She presses her lips to his, and fuck, she tastes divine. "I'm going to get cleaned up, put some of my healing poultice on this. I'll be fine by morning, I promise." She gathers up her clothes and disappears into her bathroom, leaving Vax stunned and seething. He may not yet know who harmed her, who spilled her blood and left her to limp home, but when he does, he will become every bit the ruthless monster the man in the other room of this apartment knows him to be.

[wonusite]

So while I attempt to get myself together (turns out work is tiring and makes your brain turn to mush while thinking about Joshua), here's a list of nerd!shua headcannons I have in no particular order:

Sloppy kisses. Not only are you and Josh constantly all over each other in public (PDA and you two are basically synonymous at this point) but it's sloppy, there's tongue and spit and touching and grinding and on campus security has definitely had their fair share of stern talking to's with you (you're actually their least favourite to break up too, since it always takes a minute or two for you to break for air and they just have to stand there and wait for you to acknowledge their existence please for the love of God will you guys just get a room holy shit)

Gifting each other a Lovense Lush and a Lovense Gush for the first year anniversary <3 presentations, tournaments, study group sessions, suddenly everything becomes a lot more interesting. I can see josh being so so so mean to you and making you cum and cum and cum until you're so sensitive and overstimulated you're in tears. On the flip side, you edge the shit out of poor little Joshie. His cum is all yours to touch, taste and play with. If he's not making a mess out of you, he's not getting release period.

Moving in together!!! Y'all are so in love that by the time the next year comes around, you don't see the point in living separately when you spend almost every waking moment together and have literally slept in the same bed every single night since you started dating. You can never get enough of your cute little nerd, and now that you live together? You never have to, ever again. He's yours to keep and hold and love forever (at least until the lease ends and you guys have to figure out living arrangements again LOOOOOL)

Also, continuing on with the living together headcannon, previous tenant left behind a bed frame for you guys (score!). Unfortunately, the old Ikea bed frame can't really take the uh, impact, of the activities you get up to, especially not at the frequency of your bedroom activities. You and Josh learn a valuable lesson about investing in sturdy furniture after the fiasco (spoiler: bed collapsed mid-fuck. Unsurprisingly, it didn't stop you guys and you kept at it until you both came)

So!! Much!! Soft!!! Pure!!! Love!!! Although you're horny and fuck pretty much constantly (are we surprised? No. Are we disappointed? Depends on how much studying you were trying to get done that day HWBSJWJSJ) there's that underlying softness of that established relationship and mutual feelings. The sex is good and it feels amazing, but nothing hits quite like the love bitten smiles early in the morning over a hot cup of coffee before school, the way you nestle your head right under his chin before you fall asleep for the night, the domesticity of shua backhugging you while you cook dinner, the soft humming of Sunday morning in your ear as you're trying to make sure the garlic doesn't burn. It hits you all at once one random Tuesday afternoon that this? This is heaven. This is everything you've ever wanted in your life and you've never, ever felt so loved and cared for before. If you could spend the rest of your life just living in domestic bliss with the cute nerd from your calculus class, you would never have another complaint. Joshua is undoubtedly the love of your life, and having him by your side makes your heart feel so, so full

Josh being a TA of a class and you sucking his dick under the desk while he holds office hours. You started entertaining yourselves because usually no one stops by (especially for not prickly little Josh. He's polite, sure, but it always feels like the vibes are off when they ask him for help. The students are scared to piss off the person that grades their exams) but for some reason, there's a pesky little brunette that ALWAYS seems to come by asking for help every single week after Josh wore a particularly tight t-shirt to class one day (though you can't blame her, his tits are to die for). The first time you sucked him off while he was explaining a question to her, you did it because you were ticked off that some first year thought they could come in and sweep your boyfriend off his feet. The following times it's because your dirty little exhibitionist boyfriend cums so incredibly hard at knowing that 1) he could be caught at any moment and 2) you're so possessive over him

Pegging. No explanation needed. It's just hot to think of Josh's sparklikg eyes filled with tears because you're fucking him so good

First I love you coming after an epiphany after a fight (this is gonna be a separate ask because I've thought about it a little too hard oops I'm mentally ill what else is new)

You being soooo annoyingly in love with your boyfriend that you become THAT girl to all your friends. Omg wait did I also tell you that Josh plays gui- Guitar and he serenades you with Sunday Morning every single Sunday morning? Yes Y/N you have now shut the fuck up holy shit

You meet his mom and on paper, you're the absolute perfect girlfriend. Smart, pretty, sweet, outgoing, so caring and so in love with his darling son. She doesn't know what a vixen you are and how you've corrupted her sweet little boy, but it's okay. Even though he doesn't have his virtue anymore, you'll make sure he's nice and taken care of

Joshie needs at least 1 (one) kiss on the lips from you every single time you see each other, no exceptions. You haven't said your proper hellos to each other if you haven't had your kiss. One time you forgot and Josh gave you the cold shoulder for a week. He takes this very seriously, don't try him.

Proposes the day of convocation to celebrate the end of one chapter of your lives together and the beginning of a new one <3

[marvus-xoloto]

i DO want to talk about my little cult I made up (the one with the seadwellers, I've been calling it the cult of the ethereal idol). I'm very low on spoons at the moment, so all I've got are tidbits for now. Hopefully this is something lol. Feel free to ask me for more if you'd like! I simply don't have the mental energy to find a place to start, but I am more than capable of answering specifics.

So the center of this cult: these seadwellers worship an eldritch being. Outsiders are permitted to see it, but not to know what they're getting into. The edritch being is referred to as the Ethereal Idol to outsiders, but its name is Cnuxh'zho. Its purpose in life is basically to make fucked up sea creatures to bring it more food to eat (it eats eyes and brains <3). It does this by getting its stingers into seadwelling trolls and using them as puppets; they become mindless killing machines, dragging ususpecting trolls into the depths. The Cult Lore(tm) says this is where lususes come from.

Its thralls are considered Saints, and they get glowing "freckles" which are actually puncture marks from the hooks that Cnuxh'zho gets into them. The saints save their piss as a sort of holy water (a nod to ppl peeing on jellyfish stings); supposedly, it becomes a panacea after their death.

One of the saints- Saint of the Work- eventually built the aquarium as a place of worship and sacrifice to her God. Now trolls can just walk up to it, hear "The Voices of Temptation," and walk willingly into the enclosure (which I never explicity wrote about in my fic; it's through the gift shop; that and the pufferfish vape is why that girl was acting so fucked up <3). Usually it has a thrall to speak to outsiders, controlling it like a puppeteer. But it is psychic; psychic trolls tend to hear it in their dream for a while after viewing it (if they survive). It makes them very hungry.

They are indifferent to the caste system, thinking that seadwellers are the only ones who can be truly seen by the one, true god on alternia, and thus the caste system doesn't matter (i.e everyone is below them and it doesn't matter in what order those pitiful ppl fall). And so they are generally tolerant of more mild mannered juggalos (as long as they are appropriately polite and have seadwelling traits i.e. must have some form of vestigial gills, fins or the ability to hiccup).

[thetreetopinn]

When the queer leftist atheist goes to a conservative thanksgiving

I am very tired.

It has been a very long day.

Mostly because I spent the last 48 hours helping my mother with 90% of all of the preparations for Thanksgiving--prepping something like ten items for everyone to eat--as well as clean up, organizing, table-setting, 5-year-old wrangling, etc.

But I am also very tired because of my brother-in-law.

See, they say something you should never talk about at Thanksgiving is politics, and fucking hell let me tell you what--I know that all too well. I'm the black sheep of the family when it comes to my politics. I have learned well to not say SHIT if I can help it. I will end up getting dog-piled on.

So yeah, keep my mouth shut, don't start nothin', won't be nothin'.

And then my brother-in-law looks me dead in the eye and asks me "Hey, do you have any bitcoin?"

That was how it started.

I replied with "No, I stay as far away from anything crypto-related as I possibly can."

He wanted to talk about his favorite sports personalities getting shafted by the crypto-crash and thought I'd be sympathetic.

I am not. Not in the slightest.

"They knew what they were getting into when they bought into an unregulated financial speculation instrument. It is a scam. Nothing more, nothing less. They're trying to speedrun every financial crisis that has happened since the great depression, and it looks like they succeeded."

He promptly shut up.

Preparations continue, discussions are had, there's a video that he and my sister are confused about because their kid is way into it, and they're not doing the picosecond of googling to find out what it is, so I do the hard work for them, find out it's inappropriate for someone so little, and they ban him from watching it. Brother-in-law starts going off on a mini-rant about media:

"It's gotten so bad you don't know who to trust, not even Disney, they're trying to brainwash kids."

I want to jump in. Oh fuck do I want to jump in so god damned badly. Holy shit do I want to just clap back with "Oh yeah? Brainwashing them how? EXACTLY? Is it be an even more ardent and fanatical devotee of the mouse so they will be excited to consume more product? Then yes, I agree. If you say the world 'woke' at all, then no, because Disney is absolutely not work. They axe shit all the time because it's "too woke" and queerbait constantly."

But I don't. I don't give him the rundown of what happened with the now deposed CEO who elected to not advertise the children's animated film that has an openly gay lead character so it would fail and use that as justification to axe more queer stories. I keep my fucking mouth shut.

We do the usual prayer around the table--as an atheist, I'm surprised I don't burst into flames--and while we're eating... my brother-in-law starts asking me about Mars.

"Do you think we'll ever get to Mars?"

Now... I know EXACTLY where this is going. I know PRECISELY who he wants to talk about. I know SPECIFICALLY where he wants to drive the subject... but I don't let him.

See, I'm a fucking space nerd and I can talk CIRCLES around the subject he wants to bullseye without ever straying into that maelstrom. Yes I know I'm mixing my metaphors. I don't care.

We have a legitimately decent discussion about the difficulties of spaceflight and traveling to another world and how NASA has provided so much spin-off technology and the actual benefits of having a human space flight program... even though he's trying--TRYING HIS DAMNEDEST--to bait me into something more provocative, whether he means it intentionally or not.

He sees he's not gonna get me this time and the discussion dies down.

Hours later, we're watching a movie, the credits roll, and I swear to you... completely unprovoked, not even mentioned anywhere in the film, nothing. Completely and utterly out of the blue:

"What are your thoughts on Jordan Peterson?"

Okay, sit down boo... we gonna have a FUCKIN' CHAT 'cause I got thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

You wanna go there? Let's go there. There is no FUCKING way he didn't know that was going to cause a problem. Peterson is too polarizing a figure. So I lay it on him as politely and gently as I can.

"I don't like him. He pushes a lot of wrong-headed ideology. He is a liar and a charlatan who has messianic thinking."

Hooo boy... turns out my brother-in-law is a Jordan Peterson stan.

Fucking great.

He starts in on the bullshit about making misgendering someone a crime you can be imprisoned for. I rebut with "no it's not, that's a lie"

He comes back with "I don't know where you get your information from" and "Just look it up, get out your phone and look up Jordan Peterson C-16"

So I fucking do, right there, in front of him.

In less than 30 fucking seconds, I find a legitimately credible source that says "No, Peterson is full of shit, it's not a crime, you can't be sent to jail for using the wrong pronouns" and I say "So he lied... like a liar."

And of course... because it runs counter to the narrative he wants to believe, he laughs derisively and dismisses me. I counter with "oh by the way, if you wanna come at me with that guy who was held in contempt for misgendering his child? That didn't happen either. He was held in contempt because the judge explicitly said to not discuss the matter of the court case in public, and he went and did that... even tried to raise money off of it. The judge slapped him with 'you were told explicitly not to do that, and you went and did it anyway"

Brother-in-law's response...

"Ah."

Just... fucking hell.

To my sister's credit, she saw where this was going the MINUTE he said the name "Jordan Peterson" and started packing everything up to haul the family home. She knew her husband was baiting me, she knew he was doing it all fucking day, and he finally got me to take that bait.

They left, and it was just me and my parents.

I apologized to them for getting argumentative, but it's something that's deeply important to me, to fight back against those false narratives that have gotten people killed--RECENTLY.

There was a... 'discussion' to be had, and my parents trotted out the same, tired centrist talking points "How do we get back to where we can just have a normal, civilized conversation and respect each other even if we disagree?"

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN RESPECT

PUSHING THE DANGEROUS AND LIFE-THREATENING MISINFORMATION PETERSON AND HIS ILK PUSH ABOUT TRANS PEOPLE GETS THEM--AND QUEER PEOPLE IN GENERAL--KILLED. YOU DO NOT POLITELY ARGUE WITH THAT.

You try to gently educate if you can. You provide documentation and sources and evidence if possible. But you do. not. DEBATE. This is not a discussion.

My dad whips out this "When I was your age or younger I too had a lot of really strong opinions. I felt like my opinion was the most important one and everyone should agree with me."

And I stomped down HARD on that shit:

"I'm sorry... is that what you think of me? Do you really think I believe my opinion is the most important one? If that's what you genuinely think then we need to have a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT discussion."

It took me 30 god damn minutes to get both my mom and my dad to come around to the simple idea of "this isn't just a difference of opinion, this is pushing back against dangerous misinformation that gets people killed" and even then... they clearly didn't fully get where I was coming from.

My mom brought up "well I hear all this hateful stuff from the LGBTQIA+ whatever community"

"What hateful stuff, specifically? I wanna address it."

"Well... all this... you know... they force little kids to have surgery-"

"That doesn't happen. That is a lie. No doctor will perform gender affirming surgery on anyone under 18. And HRT, they will not provide that if you're 12 or younger. If you're talking about puberty blockers, those are completely safe and reversible--even though getting them is extremely difficult. You can't just go to the doctor and ask for them and boom... your child suddenly has HRT and new genitals. It takes YEARS sometimes just to take the first step--EVEN FOR ADULTS."

"Then why do politicians keep saying it?"

"They lie. They lie to keep you afraid. To keep you hating the 'right' kind of people. To keep you whipped up and voting for them. That's why."

Mom didn't like that. I don't know if she accepted it or not.

When I asked her point blank "Do you think gay and trans people should be allowed to exist with the same rights as straight and cis people?" she DID say that she does think they should.... so... at least her heart is in the right place I guess.

I didn't hear an answer from my dad on the point.

But they really REALLY wanted to make it sound like it was MY fault for rising to my brother-in-law's bait. Motherfucker was TRYING, and god damn did he fucking succeed.

Mom trotted out the "Whatever you wanna do in your own home, that's fine. I just don't want it in my face."

That's when I started talking about representation in media, how straight cis people are EVERYWHERE... from a queer perspective, heteronormativity is shoved in THEIR faces from every angle.

I went on to talk about the Hayes Code, which neither of them had heard about, the 'bury your gays' trope, the fact that the queer community loves Disney villains like Jafar, Ursula, Scar, etc. because of queer coding

Because "well if this is the only representation we get, then we'll take it and make it our own"

I told them about Strange World and how the former CEO tries to bury it because of his raging homophobia.

My mom was shocked... ACTUALLY SHOCKED... about the queer coding of Disney villains.

"That's wild... I never saw them like that, they were just bad guys in Disney movies to me."

"Yeah... exactly my point. You don't see it. Queer people do. And if you can only see yourself in the villain... what's that say? That tells you that's what the world sees you as."

I went on with: "Why is it that when we see a little boy and a little girl being boyfriend and girlfriend in movies and what not, it's cute and innocent, but if it's a little boy and a little boy or a little girl and a little girl, it's suddenly SEXUALLIZED!? Why isn't the little boy and the little girl seen as sexual?"

Neither mom nor dad could answer.

Eventually, it came back to: "How do we get back to having rational, civilized discussions again?"

"I don't know, but as long as a person's right to exist is up for debate, there is no civil discourse to be had. It's either you get to have rights, or you don't, and one of those is fascism."

I can see their desire to want to do the right thing, to be okay with people different than themselves... but they've just swallowed so much bullshit propaganda over the years, and they continue to. I don't know if I reached my dad. I feel like maybe I reached my mom. We don't fully agree on abortion--like, she is concerned for the life of the innocent or whatever wording she actually used, but she damn sure doesn't like the idea of the government having a say in what you can and can't do with your body.

At least we are in full agreement on that front. I tried to frame that as 'right to privacy'... but then she brought it straight back over to the vaccination card.

*LOUD, ANGRY, QUEER, LEFTIST SIGH*

"A woman's right to chose to get an abortion does not affect the life of a person she bumps into at the store. Whether or not she is vaccinated can kill that same stranger--and has killed people. I am 100% in favor of everyone having personal liberties and freedoms... but the very second your personal liberty results in someone else's death--some random person you ran into at the store or on the street... that's when it becomes something else entirely"

We also had a discussion about abortion--about when they happen the most, about why someone gets a late-term abortion, about how there are so many potential carve-outs that the government ought to allow that I just said "at that point, why do all this fucking means testing? Just give them abortion care. They're already going through enough heartbreak as it is, just let them make their choice and not be judged or criminalized for it."

There wasn't a response after that.

Dad started turning up the volume on the TV at a certain point. I think he was fucking done with me. And you know what? That's fine. I don't need his approval. I don't need his blessing. I don't even need him to fucking agree with me.

People should have the right do what they want with their own bodies. If he disagrees with that, then he's in favor of state regulated bodily control, and that's fucking fascism.

Yes, that does mean I have to be in favor of a good many things that I might disagree with--like surgically altering yourself to look like a cat... yeah, that weirds me out... but whatever, it's your body. Do what you want with it.

You wanna smoke or chew or dip or whatever? I'm not particularly fond of it, and I have some VERY strong feelings about the tobacco industry... but... it's your body. Just don't force ME to breathe your second hand smoke. I already have enough respiratory issues. It comes back to that whole personal liberties affecting another person thing.

God I'm so fucking tired.

There are so many other, better educated, better practiced, better tempered people who can handle this kind of discussion.

I hate having to be a queer elder for my own fucking family when I came to the community so late in life... especially when I have literally zero support among them.

"You just get so... so... mad."

"YEAH... BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE LITERALLY DYING BECAUSE OF THIS SHIT. WHY AREN'T YOU MAD!??!"

I think I may have to take a pass on meeting up with everyone for Christmas. If this is the direction it's gonna go again... I'm not sure I can handle it. My brother-in-law clearly wants to bait me into this shit and I don't have it in me to stay out of it.

I hope everyone had a better thanksgiving than this.

Love and solidarity.

Trans rights. Gay Rights. Reproductive Rights. Black Lives Matter. Land Back. All of this good stuff.

I just don't have the strength to handle all of it all of the time, and the world seems content to force me to do so more often than I'm able.

I could use a hug.

[rabiesprooftreerat]

Damn i really gotta rant. This thing will be in basically 2 sections, politics and the tism. I love my family, but hOLY SHIT it feels weird sometimes.

Essentially, I'll be screaming about my issues and shit

Normally, if someone has a differing political opinion from me, I'll be fine. I like hearing how others think. I can be stubborn and abrasive about it at times, I'll admit, but overall? No harm, no foul! I'll try and see from their side and respect it. After all, as long as there's no harm done, it's fine!

But, FUCK am i not safe! :)

My family and I are talking about Palestine over dinner (how it sucks, how sad the loss of innocent lives are, supporting Palestine) and eventually we get sidetracked. My sister talks about reverse eugenics (????) and we move on to US presidents. Now, I don't support Trump, I have no reason to. I am a queer, neurodivergent Latina. I have good reason not to like him, not to mention his issues as president.

My sister says that I "just don't like Trump because she's gay." Which okay???? That's still a damn good reason to not like him. That is actually a VERY VALID REASON! I say that there's more, that WE ARE LATINAS and he's a RACIST! She goes "okay?" and says that the economy was good with him as he ran the country like a business. Which you shouldn't do, you should care about your citizens. I start with this, get this point dismissed, and (I shit you not) said she liked him for his honesty.

She liked him for how honest and publicly racist he was.

What? I say that if THIS was what he showed to the public, then how was he like in private? She ignored this, and i pointed out his connection with EPSTEIN, to which she said that most big wigs are pedos anyway (not the point)! I explain how bad this is and his other crimes, to which she says that Obama also committed crimes and was secretly a racist.

Did i bring up Obama? No. Did i plan to? No. Am i saying he's completely innocent? Absolutely not. Will i search up Obama's apparent racism? NOT RIGHT NOW! THIS WAS ABOUT TRUMP AND THE ISSUES HE CAUSED! BESIDES, if i was telling you we are not safe because we're Latinas (regardless of if we were born on US soil) during his time in office, that should be taken seriously.

IF I SAID THAT I, YOUR SISTER, WAS NOT SAFE IN THE COUNTRY BECAUSE OF MY SEXUALITY, THEN YOU SHOULD LISTEN BECAUSE MY LIFE IS ON THE LINE!

Eventually, i say that i view The Orange as one of the worst, but Reagan is THE worst to me. I will say i was aggressive at this point. After all, I was pissed, and I have no reason to lie. My sister goes on saying that I wasn't even alive for it, so i can't know that he's the worst. Which, W H A T?

As if Reagan's actions don't affect us now. I am shouting because what. I SEE the effects right now with my two FUCKING E Y E S. My mom is home now and is a Reagan stan apparently, so we debate. It's more like an argument, and a sad one at that.

Now, i have a bad habit of talking down to people if i believe i am right. Regardless of age or superiority, i can do this to you. Is it bad? Yeah! I don't like doing it either. It's annoying and feels a little gross. If i am given some respect and reasoning about something, I don't do it. You treated me as an equal and i have no reason to talk down to you. I will return that respect as best i can. BUT (as is in the case with my family) if i am treated as lesser because of my age, am interrupted too many times, or the conversation is purposely derailed with the intent to shut me up, I will talk down to you.

I will use small words, slow my speech, and talk as if you are also a child. If you cannot talk to me as an adult, then we will talk on the same level as children. I hate having to do this because it feels stupid, but I need to as it's the fastest way to regain respect in the convo. My mom even says that whenever I talk down to someone, it's because I'm usually RIGHT! She says this because I DO IT TO HER!

I have to constantly reiterate the point to both her and my sister, that Reagan has done such harm that it's still felt today. Again, i am told that i don't know what I'm talking about because i wasn't there like my mom was. I, again, try to explain why he's not good. My mom says all Latinos love Reagan 'cause of his policies and i don't know anything. She understands what I'm saying because I'm talking clearly so we can converse. She then DERAILS THE CONVERSATION!

She asks who's worse, Clinton, Bush#1, or Bush#2? I tried to bring it back because they were not part of the topic of Reagan. She continues, Clinton, Bush #1, Bush #2? I try to bring it back, cycle repeats. Slowly i get annoyed and get louder and slower each time. Eventually, i tell her bluntly that the conversation was about the Reagan Administration, not Clinton. Not George Bush. Not W. Bush. THE REAGAN ADMINISTRATION! My sister laughs, saying that my mother loved history, my mom starts about Clinton, and sits on the couch.

She allows the conversation to return to Reagan and FINALLY I can talk about his effects on unions and the economy. I am talking down to my almost 50yr. old mom at this point, who is an immigrant as well. Had she not dealt with issues, I would have been beat by now. I explain how Trickle-Down economics was a failure and how his methods of union busting are still used today. All explained slowly and clearly, like i was talking to the child i has dismissed as. She concedes that i had good points but had giggled during the explanation (my sister literally asked if i knew and i did not).

Was it rude? Yes. Could i have been better about it? Yes! I was an asshole. But damn was i tired of what I was saying not being taken seriously.

"You just don't like him cause you're gay and he's homophobic", "You know ____ did this bad thing too, right?", "You weren't there, so you can't know!" I have to talk down to an adult to be taken seriously, no matter if i am an adult or not. All because i am young.

I have to strip the authority of the grown ADULT to be on an equal level and be heard.

I am and will forever be sick of not being heard, especially when it comes to my OWN GODDAMN MIND!

Now for the tism talk. Oh my god my family is... something. Now, i have been aware of my ADHD for YEARS now. I had brought it up before with my parents when i was like 13, but it was shut down because I could never! I was "too smart" and had no mental issues (i did in fact, have mental issues). After all, a mentally ill could NEVER memorize an entire page of nothing but cancer facts! A "retard" couldn't possibly be getting all A's in elementary AND be interested in oncology! No way!

This hasn't been the first time something like this happened either. First time, I said i might be introverted because i heavily related to other introverts. After all, i get tired in my head around people and like to be alone if i need to recharge! I "took it from the internet" at the time and OOPS! I was introverted.

The second time, i said i might have ADHD because i researched the symptoms. It explained a lot as to why i struggled now in school, focus, the Leg Bounce©️, and maybe we can find a way to help me raise my grades! I was told that only my sister had it, i was lazy, and sent to a group where kids with substance abusing parents were. Despite the kids group and the drunk dad i had, i did not get better and my only solace was anime, danganronpa/other fandoms, and Amino.

Coming out as queer was taken well so not much to say there.

But then, i got on Tiktok and i got recommended all these funny and relatable people! Some had ADHD, but some were relatable in a way that the ADHD people weren't. The way these people had little things they adored with their soul, how the hot food can't touch the cold food or it's all bad, the little movements and that make them happy, how some sound is evil, etc.

I found out that they were autistic and things clicked, sorta. "This makes sense," I said. "They have the 'tism!" But what about me? Surely, I'm not autistic. I'd know! Over time i came to realize that there was a good chance i did have the 'tism.

But what about the tests! If i am diagnosed as autistic, what will happen? America is shit and what if i need to flee? That might interfere! I found the RAAD-S test along with the JoJo Autism Wheel and took it. RAAD-S: You have the tism.

Autism Wheel: Autism! You got it!

I took and retook the tests. Each time I got autism. And god!

It felt so good to have reason as to why I'm like this!

That's why flappy hands and making cat noises feel good! This is why hot and cold food can't touch or it ruins the whole plate! This is why the same foods each time is good! It's why radiological accidents live forever in my head! Why Cookie Run Kingdom and Purrfect Apawcalypse and more are switching in my head forever.

I tell my sister that i might be autistic.

She says that i can't be. I was just a smart child.

I say "what child talks about cancer?" She says a smart one.

Eventually, it's brought up in conversation and laughed about. They have me take a BUZZFEED-ESCE QUIZ to "prove" im autistic. The quiz says i got autism. I get happy and they are surprised. I have to talk about boundaries now but its weird.

They CARE about my mental state. But i have low expectations for them. If you have low expectations, its hard to be disappointed. So i cry because this is new. Too many feelings and i cry.

IT TOOK OVER A DECADE TO NOTICE ANYTHING. AND I CRY BECAUSE I AM FINALLY LISTEN TO AND ITS WEIRD! WHAY IS IT WEIRD AND WHY CANT I TALK ABOUT MY FEELINGS AND BOUNDARIES?

And its because it never happened. Boundaries didn't exist and i was "too sensitive" so i had to get better. My mom told me ONCE as a JOKE to "stop crying or I'll never watch movies with you" when i was, at most, 10 years old. So i stopped and no one cared. I started my covering my mouth with my hands, then crying quietly, to silent tears, to not crying. Hell she was surprised that i don't cry at tearjerking scenes because she forgot what she told me. No one cared then so why should i believe it now? I want to but i cant. And it's really sad.

End of rant ig

[ramblingzombpossum]

Last night I got to play Burning Wheel, it's a fantasy Greek Setting with big Avatar the Last Airbender vibes.

My character was unexpectedly (we the players and GM agreed to it right before the decision in game), declared the Arch-Mage, and since then she has done everything she can to stay neutral, calm, and not start worsening the wars between the city-states.

A lot has happened, and last night's game she decided she was tired of just letting fate and other's dictate what she does, instead, she convinced her man (an Enkavman Soldier who had spent years trying to woo her in Kentriko, but she never reciprocated because she didn't want to get hurt again, but after all they've been through, she absolutely has fallen) to go ahead of the caravan they're with to get to Enkavma early so they can spend just a little time together where she is not 'thw Arch-Mage, beholden to the people and responsible for the world' but instead JUST Cassandra as she was back in her home village.

Sebastian was giving her a tour, and because no one knew who she was, she got a real good look of what the problems of the city are.

Including the lower part of the city flooded and many of the families forced out of their homes. Many of the families sleeping on the streets, because the inns are all full. Guards walking the streets and waking people to get up and moving so that they are not there when the Arch-Mage shows up (you know, it'd look bad to have that kind of a problem.) Which nearly came down to her getting arrested because she hadn't gotten much sleep, since her only coins are Trokosi, which they don't accept because war hate, so her and Sebastian wound up sleeping on the street as well. (Boy that's going to be a fun thing to deal with.)

Since she was on the streets she was able to talk to some of the others, get a good inside perspective from the people, and not just the Politics of the city (she made that mistake in Trokos, and has some regrets.)

We ended the session with Melanion, the other player, leading the caravan into Enkavma, as everyone panics, because where the fuck is Cass, what the fuck are they going to do?

He failed to impress the Archon, and tried to be like "She is secretive..."

As Cass walked out of the crowd without thought, because there was a fucking wizard present, and she's never met a wizard.

So our ending notes were him declaring she'd been among them, and she greeted the Archon, apologizing for coming in unannounced, though she never stopped staring at the wizard, because holy fuck, he may be able to help teach her more.

I cannot wait for the next session in 2 weeks! Cass and Melanion are one of my favorite games.

The dynamic is super fun.

Cass is a quiet failed acolyte, as she never got to finish her training. She was called back to Kentriko when her father died at sea, so she could take care of her younger brother Perseus (who was the original Arch-Mage candidate.)

Melanion is a head strong carpenter apprentice with dreams of grandeur. He has been training all his life to one day compete in the games, even though no one knew if the games would ever return, because the Arch-Mage was unknown/missing for 20 years. He is very much a Greek Hero, and loves the adoration and attention.

Perseus, despite being an NPC, has been a very key character. Not only is he Mel's best friend, but he is the reason Cass sold her house, quit her job, traveled to Trokos, and was declared Arch-Mage because he didn't want to stand alone in the deciding. Perseus is a headstrong asshole a lot of the time, who Cass has always had some jealousy and bitterness towards, because their dad preferred him, not only for being a male but also because Cass looks much like their mother, and it hurt him a great deal.

I could probably go on and on about the game so far, last session was one of the few Cass heavy sessions, and I really enjoyed that. Usually she kind of floats about, but I'm trying to make my beliefs much more solid to help give her more backbone in the game.

[violetren]

Aether Chapter 16

The fucking audacity to end the last chapter on a talking cat and then start the next with absolutely 0 cats present or spoken off.

Like I'm glad Maggie is getting recognition for how many lives she saved. And also that she's having that moment of "holy shit I can help way more than I thought and I didn't even get into some awful fight" moment. It's so good.

BUT WHERE THE FUCK, AND WHAT THE FUCK IS MAXINE!?

Hannah seemed like she'd rather eat a crate of lemons than go into Maggie's head again and risk feed back but she did it and it was very helpful so good on her.

We finally have the answer as to how in the fuck Garrett is gonna come back into this and wow. Wonder if Sierra will do anything stupid when she finds out.

The discovery came with A LOT a math. I'm glad Maggie got to have that whiteboard she wanted back at the start this time around but broadly I was smiling and nodding politely much like the rest of the table. The only reason I'm not an english major is because there is (hypothetically) more job opportunities as a media major and also it lets me try out a bunch more things. The point is I am not a numbers or physics brained person and this was a lot of physics brain stuff.

That said it was covered in a very coherent way and less confusing than a lot of science fiction logic behind powers and disastrous weapons usually is. What I'm saying here is more to the tune of I don't know enough to have snappy comments about the majority of the scene.

I did get the Dune reference though.

And I thought it was nice that Varsha got Sierra on the intercom to kick Maggie in the head and connect the reference. Hannah could afford to take notes.

And then we end on Maggie realising she's under an NDA. It's come up a few times that she has/had security clearance though never mentioned what for, but did let us know it was so secret she didn't even tell Sierra. It even came up at the start of this chapter with her accepting Nomi's request not to say shit to Sierra until after Sierra consents to a telepathic interrogation.

I am excited to find out what the project was, because I bet Nomi and Elisa did not take that "I can't tell you" well.

[rpclefairy]

𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒

❛ all the sudden i got a random burst of energy, and i think it's my body's last hurrah before it completely shut down. ❜

❛ i'm not superstitious... but i am a little stitious. ❜

❛ when someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying 'haven’t decided yet' is typically a good response. ❜

❛ not trying to brag or anything, but i can wake up without an alarm clock now simply due to my crippling and overwhelming anxiety, so... ❜

❛ i came out here to attack people and i'm honestly having such a good time right now. ❜

❛ fool me once, i’m gonna kill you. ❜

❛ i feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

❛ died and came back as a cowboy, i call that reintarnation. ❜

❛ you can't wake up if you never got to sleep. ❜

❛ you can de-escalate any situation by simply saying, 'are we about to kiss?' ❜

❛ you seem familiar, have i threatened you before? ❜

❛ some of you may die, but that’s a sacrifice i’m willing to make. ❜

❛ if i can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, i think my body will shut down. ❜

❛ theater kids are just choir kids who joined forces with the band and strings kids. ❜

❛ i am very small and i have no money, so you can imagine the kind of stress that i'm under. ❜

❛ maybe the true treasure was friendship all along. but i hope not, because i can’t spend friendship on new clothes. ❜

❛ okay stop asking me if i'm straight, gay, bi, whatever. i identify as a fucking threat. ❜

❛ i'm usually that person who has no idea what's going on. ❜

❛ what doesn't kill me should run, because now i'm fucking pissed. ❜

❛ my life isn’t as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like. ❜

❛ i’m sick and tired of being called 'mortal' like, you don’t know that. neither do i. i have never died even once. nothing has been proven yet. stop making assumptions. ❜

❛ if you can’t beat them, dress better than them. ❜

❛ 'person of interest' is almost too flattering. ❜

❛ drink your school, stay in drugs, and get 8 hours of drugs. ❜

❛ physically, yes, i could fight a bird. but emotionally? imagine the toll. ❜

❛ you’ll have a hard time believing this because it never happens but i made a mistake. ❜

❛ my expectations were low but holy fuck. ❜

❛ well, well, well... if it isn’t my old friend: the dawning realization that i fucked up bad. ❜

❛ dear friend, your gift this year… is me. that’s right, another year of friendship. your membership has been renewed. ❜

❛ i’ve come to a point in my life where i need a stronger word than fuck. ❜

❛ i have met some of the most insufferable people. but they also met me. ❜

❛ new year, same me. because i'm perfect. ❜

❛ just because i'm too short to reach the lowest self in the cabinet doesn't mean you shouldn't watch out for your kneecaps. ❜

❛ forgive me father, for i have sinny-sin-sinned. ❜

❛ so apparently the 'bad vibes' i’ve been feeling are actually severe psychological distress. ❜

❛ with great power comes great need to take a nap. wake me up later. ❜

❛ behold, the field in which i grow my fucks! lay thine eyes upon it, and thou shalt see that it is barren! ❜

❛ sometimes i'll start a sentence and i don't even know where it's going. i just hope i find it along the way. ❜

❛ i was born for politics. i have great hair and i love lying. ❜

❛ schrödinger’s cat is overrated. if you wanna see something that’s ❛ both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day. ❜

[mono-dot-jpeg]

"who are you calling papa?" - aether, thoma, zhongli & xiao

summary; who would've thought that your future child would meet you?

genre; headcanons, fluff, comedy, established relationships with all boys (only dating), number of children you have is varied and not established in all scenarios (except for thoma's)

[gender neutral reader] [reader is never blatantly referred to as mom or dad]

a/n; i am sincerely sorry that i haven't done this requests more over any requests. life is tough ya know? but you don't need to worry about that! i'm here now :]

hope u enjoy and thank u for your patience <3

now it was a relatively simple day for you and aether

killing hilichurls and eating with paimon.

the usual

until

"I FOUND YOU!"

a child is running at you at mach 20 and nearly making you fall

"eh?"

"papa! i got lost!" this child turns to look at aether who is just as surprised as you

what the fuck is going on

"who are you calling papa?"

"you!" the child points to aether

"now since when did we have a kid? when were you born?"

"2XXX!" oh. OH.

"you're from the future.. i see.." aether quickly realizes

wait, this kid is from the future- this means-

aether sort of glances at you before his face is flushed and red

he marries you in the future? he couldn't be more happier but also holy shit he marries you in the future-

but before he could melt in happiness, he's gotta get this child back to the future.

you and thoma were finally hanging out for once, he had a day off and he wanted to spend it with you :)

but that wasn't so easy upon finding out that two kids from the future were claiming to be your kids

"what in the-"

"language, sweetcheeks!" thoma would scold you with a teasing grin as he seemed to handle this situation as if it was nothing

thoma seemed very entertained knowing that you would be more to him than he realized

also he's very happy in knowing that the future would be filled with some very adorable little kids

thoma's not in the biggest rush to take the kids back into the future, but he can only imagine his future self panicking and being rather worried for the two

after the whole thing was settled, knowing that he has a future with you will never leave him or his mind after

in all his years of living as a human, animal, hybrid, etc, he has never had this happen

here he was with his future child that was nearly a splitting image of him, you almost thought it was past zhongli

"my dear, i was not this polite back then." he would mutter to you as he would watch you smother your shared future child

"you're so cute! i am surprised that you settled with me in the future, zhongli." the child seems more than pleased with your affections and attention as you continue rubbing their cheeks

"baba really loves you! don't say that!"

this kid was unsurprisingly smart, seeming to pick up your words that had a hint of insecurity

"well, they're right about that, my love. be it past, present or future, i do love you and would never think of you as any less than perfect."

your child is groaning in the background, seems like this would be a normal occurrence in the future

honestly zhongli wouldn't be so panicked either, he's probably seen crazier shit than this, considering he's lived for so long in different forms

after that whole situation, you find yourselves very pleased in each other's presence

"wait, is he a half god or just a human-"

UH-

GOD HELP HIM AND HIS CHILD

he doesn't know what to say, how to react, like what the actual fuck is going on and why is there a child that is calling me baba

lots of silent confusion

looks like you have to take the reins and deal with this

it's relatively simple

the kid has adapted more of an extroverted personality than your introvert adeptus

xiao's rather thankful that the kid is more than understanding of xiao's lack of speaking

it seems like it stays with him in the future

"they always say that you're never used to talking to me and to not bother you too much." aw how sweet of future yo- "they also say you're a coward sometimes." oh.

you bursted out laughing at your future child being so blunt

"the apple did not fall far from the tree after all"

"just you wait, y/n.." xiao would mutter as if cursing both present and future you

you both know xiao has a soft spot for you and that didn't seem to change at all considering your own future child is here

"don't worry xiao! you'll get your revenge in the future." you joked

aside from the internal evil plotting xiao had in mind every time this child would expose future him, it was actually a nice time.

not that xiao would ever admit that he was happy that there was future for you two