#I too would put my silly little creatures into that case

[94erz]

OMG, FREE HIM!!!!!

[kachowden]

OMG I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT ARMAROS!!!! he’s lovely

For those of you curious about this creature v

Here’s a little information about him ❤️

He was originally created as a baldurs gate oc! He was my Tav, before becoming a part of a short story I had written (self indulgently), where he becomes a party member of the Player. And then from them I kinda fell in love with him and he took on a life of his own as a completely separate character.

His lore stems from having been a somewhat unconventional drow, who had a few too many ideals about life outside of the underdark and too many altruistic ambitions that stray a bit too far from their typical religious teachings under Lolth.

With his desire to venture outward and away from the group, as well as being a rather tall species of drow, and therefor “imperfect”, he was cast aside into the above to live out his absurd existence. After an unsuccessful attempt at becoming part of the elven species, (still being regarded as an “evil drow”, despite his rather timid disposition) he was led to wander for a while, before coming across a traveler. (In this case, you)

Now drow are known for their manipulation and mistrust of others, and while Armaros is a bit of an unusual drow, that way of life is still rather ingrained into his heart and mind. So he puts on act, a rather silly one given his stature, and plays the role of a helpless victim. He sells the role rather convincingly, and is absolutely delighted when you allow him to join your journey.

It doesn’t take long for him to develop a crush on you, especially if you’re of a separate species. But it all becomes set in stone when you valiantly come to his aid during a particularly nasty spat with some ogres and goblins.

“‘….This feeling in his chest. It hurt. Was he dying? Had life outside the underdark warped him deep inside? Why was it, that as he watched you fight against the beasts that had attacked him, his heart raced and throbbbed within his ribs. His lungs hurt from how powerful the thuds were, and his ears twitched, swearing that even amidst the swords clashing against each other, you’d be able to hear it….’

‘..His cheeks burned in an unusual manor, almost like the shameful burn he’d feel when his fellow drow had scoffed at his words when he gushed about life above. But this wasn’t shame. No, it was too fluttery, to dizzying to be such a negative emotion…’

‘Drow were highly intelligent, so it didn’t take long for Aros to connect the dots, when his eyes stayed so dutifully locked onto your form, a holy light seeming to shine around you and reflect off the sweat that beaded your skin…’

‘..You must have been a god.’

‘…A benevolent being sent to guide him and keep him safe, to restore his faith and to nurse him back to health with your kind words and gentle touches..’

‘..Yes, that was it. You were a God. His God.’”

Armaros, despite being a highly intelligent creature, had taken his realization of love towards you (despite only having known you a few days), and twisted into something made of unhealthy devotion. His belief that Lolth teachings were not suited to him, left him feeling a bit lost previously, and so when his somewhat deluded mind latched onto the way you protected him, and seemed to bathe him in your holy presence, he became your faithful little follower.

Offering you gifts, and praising poems. Upholding your words like they were sacred teachings, and even going as far as to write them down. “My god, My savior, My Lord, My Holy One” were all names he had referred to you as while you continued your journeys together. You were obviously a little disturbed by such a drastic title, but no matter how insistent you were, he would merely smile with such a love struck gaze and go on about humble and kind you were. You could be a completely evil and rule being deep down, and he’d still defend you till dying breath, and insist that his god could do no wrong.

Now despite the belief that the very ground you walked on was sacred, it didn’t stop his more selfish desires. Yes he knew he was hopelessly in love with you, but his belief that you were his god shrouded that love with obsession and a twisted lustful shame that brewed deep inside him. He even fought with himself in thinking that he did not deserve you in such a way, and yet did not believe anyone else would be a more suited lover for you. No one would worship you like he did.

His eyes would often wander down your figure, or lunge towards your lips when you spoke. He was still a rather pathetic character, or at least he behaved in a rather timid and shy way. Often whining about various things, and clinging desperately to your form as you walked, mumbling about how unfit it was to have you walk, you should let him carry you! He’s strong, and his stamina in unmatched. He could take care of you in anyway you saw fit.

No no! You mustn’t prune your hands with the rivers water, let him! He’ll bathe you, and rest assured he won’t miss a a single inch. Perhaps his hands wander a little to much and his washing becomes something more akin to a massage but nonetheless. You’re certainly squeaky clean by the end of it. 



Overall, his help is usually more of a hindrance, with how much he hovers around you, and how hostile he can be towards potential party members. He’s selfish with his god, why would others deserve to worship you the way he does? They can praise you from a distance.

But anyway that’s pretty much his lore🙏 I love him so freaking much, makes me kick my feet and twirl my hair fr.

[astarion-approves]

Drabble request: Astarion having to work through the logistics of kissing his much shorter lover (like a gnome or halfling)

Astarion x GN! Short reader

Fluff, silly, slightly ooc, mostly SFW - referenced past bedding together. NO BETA and very lazy proof reading.

-------

This relationship with Astarion was admittedly off to a strange start.

In the beginning, the vampire seemed to avoid you, his behavior uncertain whenever he was around you. He wasn’t necessarily shy, not exactly — but more so because he didn’t know how to behave around you…

Because you’re short.

More often than not you would find his eyes on you, and you thought that he might be sizing you up. Although you were strong, many thought you would go down easily based on your height. A judgment that would always end in their demise.

However, then the comments began.

“Such an adorable little creature, I wish I could put you in my pocket.”

“You know, you’re at the perfect height to— Hm, Nevermind.”

“Have you ever slept with someone taller than you? … Would you care to try it?”

And then you slept together.

Maybe it was after defeating an entire army of goblins, or maybe it was this building tension between you, but you were pulled together so quickly that you never had the time to figure out what this relationship was.

And ever since that first night… Astarion has been making excuses to kiss you, and it was always in the form of dropping something next to you.

Walking through the cities, hiking over a mountain, in the middle of battle, Astarion would ‘accidentally’ drop something next to you and take the opportunity to kiss you.

“Shit.”

Astarion stood next to your bedding, having just dropped a comb onto the ground next to you.

“Oh my. How embarrassing.”

Then he bent down, reaching for the comb but his gaze focused on you. He smiled, leaning close to you, his lips glossy and tempting—

“Well, I suppose while I’m down here…. I could kiss you.”

The kisses were always soft, filled with so much tenderness that you never expected with such a creature. A slight brush of his tongue over your lips, teasing you, daring you to deepen the kiss and take it even further.

‘Astarion.’

You place your hand against his chest, gently pushing him back.

‘You don’t have to keep dropping things to kiss me.’

Astarion narrowed his eyes at you, a slow creeping of blush blooming on his cheeks.

“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m just clumsy is all.”

‘Are you saying you don’t want to kiss me then?’

He sighed before dropping himself next to you and kicking his legs out in front of himself.

“No. That’s not what I’m saying at all, darling.”

Astarion chucked to himself, shaking his head as he did.

“I wasn’t sure what this was. Us. Together.”

‘I like you.’

He straightened up, clearing his throat and blushing even harder now at your blunt confession.

“Do you now? Well… in that case we could try being together.”

‘I would like that.’

“A good thing too, I was running out of things to drop. I was going to start making excuses with needing to tie my shoes…”

You both look down to his boots as he rotates them side to side in front of himself, and you can’t help but laugh.

‘Astarion, you boots have no laces.’

“Exactly. That would have been very embarrassing…”

[jaytalking]

Okay okay.

NAOOOO—

*inhaaalE*

So your Plasmius design.

*claps hands together multiple times*

Where do I even BEGIN to appreciate it OML I would fail at doing so-

Okay so.

Numero uno *cough*

The whole thing about him looking younger to embrace the vampire part. Yes. Yes I love that. That is now canon in my heart because it just WORKS. SO MUCH.

Because I feel like it could also tie into the fact that Vlad in the show is so obsessed with having lost everything and wanting all of it back, his youth included-

So he'd look younger as Plasmius EEEEEEEE

Also I LOVE how his eye shape changes as Plasmius and he looks more. Hostile and dangerous if you will—*explodes* eyes are the windows to one's soul I love eyes sm-

THE FANGS. THE FANGSSSSS—*taps the microphone* HE'S A VAMPIREEEE—

The way you turned the top of his cape into flames??? That is literally so so SO cool and amazing

Makes me wonder if he can maybe. Change the shape of it/make it appear and disappear whenever he wants?

Also his hands constantly looking like they have blood on them??? AND IT CAN SPREAD ONTO THE SURFACES HE TOUCHES??? TEN OUT OF TEN ISTG THAT IS JUST SOMETHING ELSEEEE/POS

Your young Vlad looks so huggable idk why

(Sorry kinda unrelated but I feel like younger Vlad was SUCH a timid person. And he'd get shy fast but he'd also be quite confident whenever he wanted.)

THE LOWER PART OF HIS HAIR BEING WHITE. I WILL—*holds head* "yes officer it's this design right here—"/silly

AND THE SCAR

Gosh my favorite part EVER

THEM GLOWING

OH MY DAYS THAT IS AWESOME

He looks like a fiery demon from the pits of hell I love it

I'm here for it

I'll put him in a freezer so he can cool down—/silly

I think we should give him pomegranate sorbet I think he'll like it

Cuz like

It's sour, but also has a sliiiight sweetness to it, and it has a bitterness in its core because of the pomegranate seeds. Idk I feel like that is just. So Vlad. Shfjfkvkvkv—/silly

Also very randomly: Vlad be like:

"Oh look, a sophisticated business man!"

"Oh, he’s a little bit messed up, actually..."

BUT YEAH I JUST ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOUR DESIGN FOR HIM I'LL HOLD HIM IN MY HANDS LIKE A LITTLE CREATURE/POS

Jophofhchvv thank you I never know how to respond to but know that we're screaming together!

Here's some fun facts about EctoScience Vlad:

-I really wanted to give him a dangerous vibe, ghosts can eat other ghosts to grow stronger extremely quickly in this AU and that's partly why he's as strong as he is, the other part being... halfas are just very powerful. Simply. Anyways everyone in the Zone knows and fears him; at the start of the series he's almost a boogeyman of sorts there until Danny starts beating him.

- Vlad didn't have a ghost form at first! His becoming a Halfa actually took a long time due to how it happened, and that's technically how it'll go for Danny too, he's just further along due to his own death being wayyy more violent than Vlad's. The progression into full ghost has slowed down a lot in Vlad's case, but for the reason I just mentioned, Danny's progression is fast.

- The "I hate you!" "You're like me!" Exchange is something I've had in mind since the start. In this AU specifically the circumstances of their "deaths" are extremely similar, but above all Danny fears turning fully into a ghost will make him lose his humanity and turn him evil due to, you know, actually listening to the "all ghosts are evil" bogus his parents believe. Vlad can sense that insecurity and in this AU he latches onto it like a vice to make Danny think him joining Vlad's side is inevitable in the end.

- Yes, he CAN make his cape disappear if it starts getting in his way in a fight, but I would also like to highlight his fire core making him very warm. Cats love him.

- His general behaviour as a ghost has been changed a little, he acts and fights fairly normally at first, but if the fight drags on for too long or his opponent runs away he's going FULL HORROR MOVIE VILLAIN. That first fight in the mansion was a lot longer and made Danny genuinely fear for his life. Let Vlad be MORE unhinged when he's pissed off I say.

[cock-ainee]

I'm fairly surprised with how fast I wrote it (it's because it's short af lol)

The Night Guard

___________________________

Word count: 1607

Category: smut

• fingering • orgasm denial • mentions of blood (not in the sex part though) • slight violence • robot/human intercourse?? •

Characters: Springtrap x afab reader

Enjoy!

Dusty hallways, rusty vents, everything dirty and nasty. That's what the job YN accepted looked like. She didn't even have a clue why she agreed to that. Maybe because it was her only choice, and it was easy enough.

She walked down the corridor, that lead to the office she was supposed to spend 6 HOURS in. 6 motherfucking long, boring hours. At least nothing would happen, right? This place was abandoned, and it was night. Nobody would get there, aside from some kids that would try to act like some silly explorers, or something.

Could YN blame them though..? The place was pretty interesting, creepy even. It was her fault that she was just too eepy to even look at the advantages of working at such a place.

And she started hating it even more after the clock hit 2am.

Till then, she was just clicking random buttons on her tablet to fix the occuring errors, or was looking over the cameras.

Until she saw the shit that was lurking in one of the vents.

A fucking enormous, yellow rabbit, that looked like it has been thrown into a shredding machine.

And the thing moved just before her eyes. It pointed it's empty, dead gaze right at her, making her heart stop.

No, it wasn't any "romantic" moment. It was a moment of deep, breathtaking fear.

Afterall, all the animatronics were supposed to be shut, not moving the fuck around, especially not trough vents. Who the hell would've taught them that??!

YN immediately stood up, scanning the room for any possible weapon she could use against the animatronic. She spotted a baseball bat standing in the corner and decided to just note the fact in her brain, in case she would need it. For now, she intended just to see what the fuck was happening in there.

She went out on the corridor, with a flashlight in her slightly trembling hand. The ambiance in the hallway was dark and off-putting, YN felt a need to curl herself up in a ball and stay like this till 6am.

And when she turned around the corner, she let out a frightened shriek and dropped the flashlight, that broke, making YN get surrarounded in absorbent darkness.

- S-shit! -

She quickly picked the object up and tried to turn it on, to no avail. Now she started panicking. But she then just decided to look for some "off" button in the animatronic if such thing even existed. She took a few, fearful steps towards the animatronic, and let her hands wander over the torn, broken plastic plates of it's body, that felt a little furry under the pads of her fingers.

And then her hands landed on something.. unexpected. Unpleasant. SLIMY.

A yelp escaped past YN's lips, as she took a few steps away from it, falling down on her butt. And there she was, down on the ground in front of massive animatronic, that's eyes now lit up.

And it did something that made girl's heart die in her chest. It SPOKE.

- Oh, what's wrong? Did the remains of my flesh scare you off this much, young lady? -

He took a step ahead, the metal grumbling and whirring with each movement of his robotic legs.

YN quickly scrambled up from the floor and backed away, meeting the wall with her backside.

- No use in running. You can't escape me -

The creature took a few more steps towards the girl, paralyzed with fear. Hot breath fanned over YN's neck, warm, despite of the owner's cold demeanor. The girl could feel her whole body tense at the smell of the animatronic's breath - and it lowkey smelled like rotting flesh.

How could it even breathe-? It was a machine.

YN snapped back to reality and tried to think fast, wanting to find a way to protect her life and dignity. She looked at the animatronic and seeing that it wasn't in arm reach yet, she took her chance and sprinted down the hallway, back into her office. She locked herself in it, quickly shutting off all the cameras, not to scare herself even more.

But then a loud bangs came from the door. They were creaking as if they were just about to break down. And just when YN stepped away from them, they did. The wood broke, sending parts of it flying until they hit the floor too. YN gripped the baseball bat she found earlier, intending to protect herself with it. But one powerful swing of the animatronic's arm was enough to throw it out of her grasp, and making the girl fall to her knees. Springtrap rose her up by her chin, reaching his free hand out to smear her blood over his fingers. Only now did YN realise that there was a splinter stuck in her cheek.

- Tsk tsk. You're bleeding. What a silly little girl you are -

His voice was dark and enticing, and YN strangely found herself kind of.. responding to it.

- W-what are you? -

She asked fearfully, her eyes darting over the animatronic, looking like a prey who has just been caught by a predator.

- "What"? Oh dear, don't treat me like an animal -

He spoke and another dark chuckle left his.. mouth?

- Most call me.. Springtrap. You can call me however you'd like.. but it still doesn't change your situation -

YN gulped, feeling his plastic hand trail over her throat.

- Are you.. going to kill me? -

- Kill you? That would be too easy, don't you think? I'd rather use you.. the other way -

Girl's heart sank. What could he mean? She felt terror making it's way up her spine, sending chills over it. And then, she was thrown across the desk, on her back, as Springtrap towered above her. His big hands trailed over her waist, as the realisation slowly hit YN. This was his "other way".

- I haven't seen a woman for so long... Let alone a woman.. not to mention me having a touch of a woman -

- Please.. I'll do anything you wish, but just... Please not this -

Springtrap immediately shut her up, with a glare that seemed..alarmingly sharp.

- If not this.. i can simply kill you. Would you like that? -

Silence and a shudder from YN answered him.

- That's what i thought -

Moments later, YN's clothes were ripped and discarded to the floor. Girl's nipples stiffened from the cold air hitting them, and Springtrap just stayed silent, looking over at the girl's body. His cold fingers kneaded the flesh, soft and plushy under his touch.

- Fascinating.. -

He muttered, turning the girl onto her stomach, making her let out an unintended moan at the way her hardened buds rubbed over the desk. Springtrap chuckled.

- Don't worry.. soon enough, you'll be.. making these sounds louder -

YN felt plastic touch on her thighs and couldn't help but whine at the way the digits brushed over her pearl and sensitive folds. She felt embarrassed, because she wasn't supposed to be reacting to it this way.

Springtrap laughed as his finger circled over YN's entrance, finding out that she wasn't necessarily all dry.

- You're starting to like this, aren't you? That's such a shame -

The girl let out a yelp as suddenly Springtrap's finger pushed inside her, stretching her inner walls just with it. It was scary how much it filled her alone. The animatronic marveled over the female, taking in notes of her reactions. Every whimper, every moan, every squeeze of her velvety heat on his finger. And as her thighs started shuddering, he pulled his finger out, denying her an orgasm.

YN whined pretensionally, looking at him over her shoulder just to get her head pushed down forcefully.

- Don't you even dare think it's about you -

He grumbled, as he reached to the pad of his pelvis, and YN could hear a metal click before something more humanly, oddly warm pressed over the curve of her rear.

The female gasped, understanding flooding her senses as a shiver of fear and excitement got goosebumps forming on her skin.

Springtrap's cock slid down, to rub between her legs and collect her arousal on it.

And soon, he was pushing into her, tight heat, earning a muffled moan from her.

YN cursed herself for thinking he could ever have mercy with her. She whined pathetically as he picked up the pace immediately, hitting all the soft spots inside her repeatadly, with no care for YN of the way it could hurt her.

But it only got her core gushing and sweet sounds escaping her as she neared her end once. Springtrap could feel her climaxing on his cock once, tightenjng around him and spilling juices over his cock and plastic pelvis, making the coupling more fluid.

He was mostly quiet, only letting out grunts and little groans as he pounded into her relentlessly. And soon another intense, shaky orgasm ripped trough YN, as she fell limp on the desk, too exhausted to keep her head up.

After a few more minutes of the rough session Springtrap let out a primal growl, pinning the girl down with his weight, as he released thickly inside of her.

He then pulled out his member halfly out of her, as YN tried scrambling off the desk. Springtrap chuckled darkly and pinned her down agressively again.

- Where do you think you're going? It's barely 3am -

And that were going to be 3 more long, long hours...

_____________________________________

Sorry for any mistakes or for not using colorful language, but english is my second one, so.. yk.

Anyways thank you for reading and the likes too 😭😭

[lindsay00000008]

Pet whump society headcanons

CW: Dehumanization, systemic pet whump, ableism (mention of “changelings”), allusion to apartheid with “pet only” facilities, ageism and allusion to putting pets down, yeah it gets pretty dark

How are pets dressed?

Pets would have a specific vibe of clothing or hairstyle, so it would be easy to pick them out of a crowd or sense they don’t belong. I’m thinking “fun” haircuts like wolf cut, mohawk, elaborate braids and buns. Or hairstyles that are very easy to maintain, shaved or effortlessly short and messy.

Clothing would be an overcommitment to a certain aesthetic, depending on the owner’s tastes. Usually bold and gaudy, or an uncomfortable style made to show off the pet’s best qualities.

The punk crowd could keep wearing these too, to show solidarity against pet ownership. And boomers get angry at the youths for dressing like pets just because it’s “trendy”.

That may also cause clashes with the cops or pet control departments, if they keep stopping people who “look like” pets.

Do pets have to crawl?

I mentioned in my story about Honey that only rich assholes with too much time on their hands make their pets “trot” on hands and knees everywhere they go. While it’s wrong to make your pet walk upright for too long (can be dangerous and exhausting), it’s not a good idea for them to trot outside or in most public places, as the ground is dangerous and unsanitary. Most of the time it’s acceptable for them to walk. That is, unless they’re inside a house, in which case it’s up to the house owner to determine.

Sort of like “a no-shoes household” —not everybody cares, but it’s generally polite and acceptable for pets to trot then, even if they wouldn’t normally. Sometimes the same holds true for working/service pets, made to trot within an office or classroom, whereas they would stand and walk around the rest of the facility with their owner.

They’ll generally sit or kneel on the ground when not moving, whether in public (on a train, at a restaurant, in a library) or in private. Many public places have designated plastic or rubber pads for pets to sit on, next to human seats and below tables.

Do pets use their hands?

I also made a note that while pets are still considered to have “hands” and not generally prevented from using them (not bound into paws or anything), it’s generally frowned upon and considered bad training if a pet uses it’s hands. This is because pets are silly little creatures who don’t know their own strength, and tend to hurt themselves or others if allowed the same mobility a human has. They’re basically allowed to use them as a primate might, holding food (not utensils) and drinking from them, moving a pillow or playing with a toy. But they shouldn’t be opening doors or doing more complex things like using tools (drawing/writing implements, hairbrush/toothbrush etc).

How long have pets been around?

Pet theory has been around for hundreds of years, but emerged as an evidence-based sociological/governmental designation comparatively recently. Pets have been scientifically classed and evaluated for since the late 1800s, although for many years after, only the upper class was able to afford evaluations for their family and peers. The caretaking of pets was seen as both luxury and philanthropy. While some families were shocked to learn that theirs included pets, many understood the necessity of revealing pets through scientific inquiry, as research would later show the rapid quality of life increase for pets who no longer have to play “changeling” and were treated appropriately with medication and training. It became common for rich families to evaluate prospective matches and employees for pet classification, and they often adopted those who were discovered, a generous act lauded by many pet conservationists. Nowadays pets are more commonly found and more affordably adopted, as testing procedures have simplified and become mandatory for most jobs and some cultural events, such as acquiring a marriage license or passport.

Do pets speak?

Pets are trained to rely on their caretaker to provide, and to not focus on their confusing pet thoughts. It isn’t good for a pet to engage in prolonged communication, so giving a pet small commands is most appropriate. Pets should be encouraged to reply with expressions, actions, or humming vocalizations. Some owners choose to correct their pet’s unnecessary vocalizations by trimming the hyoid bone, docking (shortening) the tongue, or (for the wealthier owners) undergoing a procedure in which a selective aphasia is triggered in the pet’s brain, keeping their comprehension in tact but limiting output ability.

Pet peeve question: pet hygiene?

Well trained pets can use the same restroom facilities as humans do. Because they’re not so dexterous with their hands, bidets are a universal commodity (lol idk - guys I really don’t want to make any pet owners rely on diapers or soemthing eugh)

It’s recommended that owners alternate sponge bathing and fully bathing their pets, checking their hygiene daily. They should also consistently brush their pet’s teeth and/or give them brushing toys to gnaw on.

It’s recommended that pets visit a care center for checkup every three months once fully trained, to ensure both physical and emotional well-being.

Pets in training should return to their home facility at least twice a week to get proper care.

Are there any older pets?

As pets age their appearance and mobility can suffer, as well as their emotional and mental well-being. While pet research is advancing and always finding new solutions to prolong the wellbeing of a pet, current projections note that a pet’s lifespan is generally between 25 and 35 years, depending on the age of pet status acknowledgement. If pets are found at a later age and do not receive proper care in time, they will generally suffer complications and resist training, requiring end of life care earlier than a well-trained and stable pet.

[3zethe3zr]

STP Voices preening headcanons

These are mostly based off of my designs for the voices (silly little anthropomorphic corvids - each a different species with a different accessory) But i thought they were too fun not to share :]

Now, in some particular order:

Takes absolute shit care of themselves and their feathers:

Broken (Collared Crow)- I feel like this one is self-explanatory. Its Broken. His feathers are fifty shades of fucked up and hes trapped in too much self loathing to ever consider preening, social or not. The manacles have damaged his wing feathers to the point that even without the chains, he cannot fly. Cold (Common Raven)- Feeling nothing does not mean they experience any discomfort when unkempt and sees self maintenance as wholly boring. Is absolutely rank. Also considers social preening an absolute waste of time, is lucky to have Hunted as a bestie Cheated (Chough)- Never gets in horrid enough condition that Broken and Cold do, but somehow manages to be worse. Does not see the point in self maintenance when his feathers are just going to get fucked up in the future, but the second he feels he's too unkempt he will start complaining. Doesn't enjoy social preening either, so the others have to force him at metaphorical gunpoint, and he whines the entire time

Takes insanely good care of their feathers:

Opportunist (Eurasian Magpie)- First impressions matter! He is always ridiculously well put together and shiny. Wants the connections social preening could give (and maybe a friend), so tries to initiate it frequently. Often the one badgering Cheated to take care of himself by appealing to Cheateds' better nature. Cheated does not have a better nature. Hunted (Malayan Black Magpie)- Well maintained feathers have a fuck ton of benefits for a Weird Fucked Up Prey Creature so Hunted is insanely diligent about making sure every feather is in order, and gets cagey and on edge when this is not the case. Social Preening is its primary way of bonding and it greatly enjoys it. The one keeping Colds feathers from getting too nasty.

Perfectly average preening habits, nothing to write home about:

Hero (Carrion Crow)- Tries his best but often ends up a little scruffed up around the edges Skeptic (Taiwan Blue Magpie)- Normally keeps themselves very presentable, you can tell when their mind is occupied as they get unkept very quickly Contrarian (Steller's Jay)- Always looks perfect without having to try at all. Everyone else hates this.

Would have good care of their feathers BUT:

Paranoid (Rook)- Anxiety is a double-edged sword, he takes very good care of his feathers due to it, but can also over-preen and has a few bald patches. His gloves bend his wing feathers out of shape and that only stresses him out more. Does not trust any of the others to preen him. Smitten (Blue Jay)- His feathers are ridiculously well groomed, and he cares about looking good. However, he does not take that helmet off ever, and nobody else is allowed to take that helmet off- so his facial & head feathers are as fucked up, bent and grimy as Broken and Colds. Perhaps even worse. Outside of the helmet thing, he delights in social preening. Stubborn (Jackdaw)- Being in good condition means he can fight for longer, so preening is a worthwhile investment to make. Post fight, you're going to need a fucking construction crew to put him and all his feathers back into place. Doesnt enjoy social preening and gets fidgety and bored fast.

[glassrowboat]

Orange Ribbon. Itto.

Summary: Dressing up animals is therapeutic, no matter what anyone says. To see them in cute little clothes, in top hats, maybe even bow ties never fails to put a smile on your face. A hobby. It's a silly one, but a hobby nonetheless. And, of course, Itto (under his own insistence) needs to be decked out by his girl, too!

Word count: 1000+

Authors note: mentions of the reader being short, but to be fair when I think of Itto I still imagine that one photo of him next to Zhongli back before he was released. Itto is seven foot in my heart damnit-

Perhaps this is the perfect hiding spot, tucked behind grandma Oni's house with a stray slab of wood leaned against the wall to cover a few boxes from the rain whenever a storm comes crawling through, and currently yourself too. The treated otogi wood had a familiar smell that filled your senses. Though admiring some lumber wasn't your prime objective of this little game of hide and seek.

Not that you really needed to bother. Shinobu said the boys would be busy today helping put up posters for one of the many odd jobs they tend to pick up just to rake in some cash. Meaning you had all the time in the world to-

And the safe haven shook, the wood peeling back from this old paneled wall of the hut to reveal red horns and wide eyes right on you. A wide smile with pointed teeth that could only belong to one man, or in this case oni. “Look what I got for us!” He called out, hand holding up a small bag that, knowing him, was undoubtedly full of snacks.

So, no time in the world then.

Heh….

Taking a lid to the box you had set the onikabuto in to keep him all nice and secure as you subjected him to dress up time you slowly tried to slide it over the little guy as Itto excitedly talked. “Well my favorite sweetie pie, my bro, I got some strawberry daifuku, melon pan, and I even scored dorayaki!”

Dropping his bag on the box you were slowly sliding the lid over with a nice, hefty thud you couldn't help but jump. Itto was right about the snacks, they were something to get excited over, but not so much so when the little bug inside made a noise from the fright he was unwillingly given. You couldn't even fully click the lid over the box in time as Itto's black nails were poking the lid off as he made a small huh?

“What are you doing to my little buddy?”

The real answer to that? Well, the stray cats in the village have taken to running away from you everything they even caught a sight of your presence. Fully self done, but it still hurt as they turned away from you, fleeing from the person who would snatch them up and cover them in bow ties, little sweaters, or on the rare occasion a top hat for the less squeamish ones. It seems that you've completely lost every cats good graces after treating them like dress up dolls so you were stuck with no choice but to turn to a creature that reasonably couldn't run away. So now there's Crimson Staff being revealed to both your eyes as a bright orange ribbon was wrapped In a neat bow around his horn.

Deflect. Deflect. 

“What have I told you about calling me bro?”

“Don't call you bro when I've had my tongue in your mouth? Sorry, babe.” As he spoke, an awkward laugh slipped out of him, sharp fangs on show as he tried to brush it off with a smile. “But what are you doing to my star onikabuto beetle battler?”

Can't have his little champion getting distracted from the ring and all that. 

Okay, the first deflection didn't work.

“It's actually for your beetle battles!” You claimed, eyes flicking down to the bright orange fabric. “It's a warning. You know how in nature the most colorful animals are the dangerous ones, right? So this is just like war paint.”

Poison dart frogs are characterized by one very important feature that could only help solidify your point, so clearly, this claim has some backing. Backing Itto only seemed to nod at as he raised a hand to pat the little guy on the back, always so careful to make sure he wouldn't do any actual harm as he did so. “Interesting way to see it.”

Not at all….

“Though I'm not sure an orange ribbon would look more menacing than the bright red color he already has. Or what about that badass looking scar? But I respect the decision.” 

“Why thank you for your approval, I'm honored.”

Teasing him didn't work well though when he moved his hand over to pinch at your cheeks, pulling and squishing them at his leisure. “You’re a goof, you know that?”

“Says the town idiot.” A little uncalled for? Yes. Did you care when he was still trying to egg a reaction out of you? No. You didn't even feel bad as your tongue stuck out to point at him.

“Who you callin’ an idiot, short stuff?” How you could see his eyes flicking down to your tongue, or maybe even your lips as he leaned in closer, towering frame crouching down to where you were kneeling close enough to kiss. 

So how could you help yourself from pressing a quick smooch to his nose, trying not to giggle outwardly as his eyes crossed to watch your actions. So cute. “You, tall stuff.”

“Oh now you're asking for it, babe.” Reaching his hands out you didn't even have time to squeal as he picked you up, raising you up and into the air as Itto stood back up. There would be no freedom for you to have like this. Especially not when he had such easy access to grab at your ass. “Alright, so let's play a guessing game, yeah?”

Without even bothering to wait for you to say yes, you're down for this, Itto kept talking. “This is because you can't dress up the cats anymore, isn't it?”

Ah…you've been figured out.

“No. Maybe. Okay, yes.”

“Then I volunteer.” Katniss? “Why bother the onikabuto when I'm right here, babe? You can tie all the ribbons you want in my hair. Get some clips too if you want. I'm down for it all.”

“Is-”

“Better yet!” Itto started, cutting you off as he jostled you in his arms to keep you from falling. Mother fucker could've given a warning. “We can get the entire gang in on it. You could make us look all cool and stuff with all sorts of things. So let's get you some ribbons so then I can be the manliest oni on the block.”

“You're…ridiculous.”

“No, I'm all yours.”

Fair. “Yeah, you are.” Grabbing a tussle of his white hair you twirl it around your finger, unable to help yourself from thinking about tying it in all sorts of ways with all the little hair accessories you have back home. Maybe the ones with little skulls, more ribbons, or that one charm Itto had got you after first becoming official. (Shinobu had only told you later Itto had worked for a week straight to get it for you). “Then you're my dress up doll for the next hour, mister. No backsies?”

“None at all. Do to me as you wish, I'm so ready for a makeover!”

Oh, you're gonna make sure he'll regret saying that.

“Challenge accepted.”

Sucker.

[dullgecko]

Expanding on my favourite head cannon that fig can be summoned using a modified version of summon fiend

Stupid things fig has been summoned for

It was a relatively quiet day at Mordred. Fig was doing archdevil things, Kristen was doing Chosen stuff, and the adults were getting dinner together.

So Adaine was baking for when they all got back, and the mixture of baked goods in the oven was ready to be taken out to cool and then have the icing put on.

However, the oven gloves were missing, and somehow all the towels were in the wash from another sentient corn monster that Kristen's cooking had evolved into.

Now alone in the house with baked goods that would either go cold before she could ice them or burn if left in there too long, and no adult to ask if they had spare oven gloves or an alternative, she realised that she had one option she could use.

She had a friend who was fireproof. A friend who could be summoned with a simple spell. Granted, they would be annoyed she had used the spell for baked goods, but the devil could probably be bribed with some extra cakes.

(I know it’s a bit different than what you normally get but they keep popping into my head so if you want I’ll keep sending them)

Fig appears in the middle of the lawn outside Mordred, a scroll clutched in her hands and trailing off behind her before getting suddenly cut-off by the edge of the summoning circle. She doesnt even notice she's somewhere different until she notices that the air is much cooler, it doesnt smell like brimstone and sulfur, and the light falling on her is different.

She drops the scroll almost immediatly when she does, grabbing her bass off her back and whirling into an attack ready position as she tries to work out where the threat she was summoned to fight is. All she sees is Adaine though, the wizard giving her a small smile and waving nervously as Fig stands back up into a more neautral position. "Hiiiii Fig~" Adaine puts her hands together, palm to palm, and ducks her head in embarasment. "Sorry there's no fight this time but I really need your help and no one else would be able to do it." "Oh shit, okay, must be important if you needed me. This can wait." Fig kicked the scroll she'd been reading, the paper rolling back up into a bundle with the momentom. "Someone need healing? Or something else? ...Riz in a case induced spiral and needs a magic nap?" "I need you to help save my brownies?" Adaine pursed her lips, looking away from Fig and to an empty patch of sky as a blush formed on her face. The elf bouncing a bit on the balls of her feet because of how silly she currently felt. "What like... those little goblin creatures from the fey wilds?" "No I need help because..." Adaine sighed, taking Figs hand when she got close and leading her through to the kitchen. "Brownies. All the dish towels are in the wash and I couldnt find the oven mits." "Oh BROWNIES... so you used spell slots to summon me to save... the brownies." Fig laughed, opening the oven and quickly retreiving the burning hot pan with her bare hands and placing it on the already waiting cooling rack Adaine had set up off to the side. "I mean, definitely a good reason to summon me... as long as i get to taste test... But why didnt you just use mage hand?" Adaine answered by way of covering her face with her hands and groaning, but Fig definitly managed to catch her mutter 'fucking mage hand' into her own palms as the tips of her ears went bright red from embarasment.

[cy-cyborg]

Hey im trying to write a centaur type character… the character has fibromyalgia and i want to represent them well by giving them some kind of mobility aid. But because of their being a centaur and the way their bodies are so different from humans’, i don’t know what kind would work best yet, and i’m afraid of designing something that won’t support their weight or will just look silly

Hm, that’s tricky. I’m not super knowledgeable about fibromyalgia, I know a few people with it and I know it causes things like pain, difficulty breathing and fatigue but that’s about it so definitely run these suggestions by someone else before you use them. I do know a decent amount about horses though.

So for mobility aids that would be primarily used by the human half, so long as you make them tall enough they should be fine. Things like crutches, canes etc, though admittedly, I’m not sure if they’d actually be helpful unless they’re only needing support for their front legs, since it probably wouldn’t relieve any pressure from the back ones. A rotator might be slightly better depending on how it’s structured, but it too wouldn’t help much with the back limbs

The centaur equivalent of a wheelchair or similar device would be much more complicated though.

Horses… don’t take well to mobility aids as a general rule of thumb, so anything for the horse half specifically is going to have issues. most quadruped animals who need a wheelchair can use a little cart or buggy like this:

[ID: A picture of a golden retriever in a mobility cart that's supporting their back legs. /End ID]

But horses really, really struggle with them. A lot of it’s behavioural, they’re prey animals and having something strapped to them like these “wheelchair carts” freaks them out and causes a lot of stress - especially if it gets stuck on something (like a rock, or crack in the ground). with training, they can learn to be relatively ok-ish with it, like how other horses are trained to be ok pulling carriages, but those carriages aren’t attached to them 24/7, these carts are.

This isn’t necessarily something that would apply to your centaur unless they’re very horse-like in behaviour, but I thought it worth a mention just in case. The bigger issue though is physical, and would 100% be a problem for centaurs. Horses are big creatures and are very heavy. It’s not good for them to lie down for too long, as all their weight can put pressure on their organs and do damage. It also makes it harder for them to breathe (that’s why, when horses are sedated for surgery, they try to keep them standing upright where possible). Likewise, a cart has to take at least part of the creature’s weight, and so long-term use puts a lot of pressure on the soft underside of their belly and chest, and causes many of the same issues.

One thing you could potentially do is give them something that mimics the ways horses “naturally” try to alleviate pain and fatigue. My mum has a very, very elderly pony (he turns 29 this year) and his knees have been giving him trouble lately, which means standing is hard, but if he lays down he might get stuck. Instead, he goes and finds trees or fence posts or the side of his stable and just leans against them (mum has padded the side of the stable he usually leans on). As a mobility aid for your centaur, this might look like the front end being supported by crutches or a cane, and the back half being supported by something tied to their back leg. I image the hind-leg crutch would stick out at a slight angle so it’s not constantly dragging along the ground, and when they need a breather or break, they could lean their body and shift their weight onto it. Something like this

[ID: A poorly drawn image of a centaur. Its human half is holding a stick-figure drawing of a crutch. Another similar crutch is tied to one of their back legs. The image shows them from the front and side, with the front showing that the rear crutch sticks out slightly. /End ID]

(I’m a professional artist lmao)

It’s not a perfect solution (and probably wouldn’t be great for their back tbh) but I’m not sure what else you could do, this at least gives them a way rest if they need it without depending on straps that could cause pressure sores/injuries to their abdomen and (horse) chest

Of course, centaurs in and of themselves are very unrealistic and their anatomy doesn’t really work either, so you can always take liberties with the realism of the horse-end mobility aid stuff. If you don’t want something on the more realistic end, I would say a cart wheelchair for the back end + crutches/canes/rotators for the front would be fine. It depends on the tone for the setting!

[womenloverlmao]

Lights (AGED UP MORGAN HESS. X Reader

In which Reader learns they have to keep the light on at nights

WC: 1.4K

(Aged Up!!! Morgan Hess) 

I was debating whether or not to post this, and I chose to because I thought it wouldn’t be weird but a sweet story. Please, please, please do not make this weird. Yall are like high schoolers in this one, its just like my Charlie or Scott stories. But in this one there is like NO sexualization possible, please I beg of you do not make this weird. YOU ARE 17 IN THIS. Yeah, I'm aware that picture is NOT him but I don't wanna put little him...don't be a pedo guys.

There is some religious…not implications, really it’s blatant. This is like a Christian story. A lot of Jesus-ness, guys. I love my Jesus, and I love to share Him. Even if you’re not religious you’re welcome to read this :) 

When you were around 10 years old, there was an alien invasion on Earth. Most people got over this alien invasion, funnily enough. It sounds like something that would have a huge effect on everyone, but humans are creatures of habit and have to fall back into what they used to do at some point. Very rarely were there any cases of PTSD, or anything of the sort. You were one of the lucky ones who never had to see anything, all you did was hear about it in the news. 

When you started to date Morgan, you knew that he had the opposite experience. You loved that boy more than anything else in the world, but something that wasn’t so fun about him was the slightly conservative part to him. He wasn’t anything crazy, in fact, he totally loved that you were in ministry and his father loved it too. His part came with the sometimes struggling with something that he got from his father, the struggling to deal with emotions and traumatic experiences. 

You, of course, knew from the news about what had happened to his family. You had heard it preached when you went to his father's church, and almost anyone in your town knew what had happened even if they didn’t go. You were no exception to this, especially not when you started to date Morgan. But he would never tell you that because of his experience, being trapped in the basement and seeing what the aliens did, caused him to have an abnormal fear of the dark. 

You were a lamp person, whenever he came over to your room he saw the many lamps or little lights you had in your room. Because of these, he automatically assumed he would be fine when you invited him to have a sleepover at your house. You would keep a light on at night, he had no reason to be afraid. Plus…Jesus was with him, nothing could go wrong. Jesus was the light of the world after all! 

You had a fun night together, watching silly movies of your choice, you had a weird thing with cups, but other than that everything went smoothly. You were staying in the same bed, but obviously, everything stayed PG. It was all sweet…until you started turning the lights off. For someone with as much of a fascination with lights as you had, you surprisingly decided to sleep without lights. The seven or so mini lights turned to five, to three, to one. At this point he started to get worried, but he didn’t wanna say anything. 

He didn’t want you to think he was a freak, and…well, the rational part of him knew that you would never say that to anyone. In all honesty, the only person he was at risk of disappointing was himself. You turned that last light off and climbed into bed…and suddenly he just couldn't do it. That fight or flight response had been completely triggered, and he was tempted to flee…but he stayed in place. He silently cried, but because you were in his proximity, you quickly figured out what that movement was. 

“Morgan?” You asked. There was no response, so you repeated. “Babe…are you crying?” 

“N- no. I’m not crying.” His voice broke in the middle of that sentence, but even without it, you would have known he was lying. 

It took you a second for it to click. “You’re scared of the dark, aren’t you?” 

Silence. 

You quickly got up to turn a lamp on. “Morgan?” 

You looked over his slightly tear-stained face and your heart almost broke. Even though he wouldn’t say it, he was your sweet boy and even the thought of him being scared to the point of tears made you feel shattered. You quickly just got his inhaler out of his bag anyway, letting him use it if needed before talking to him again. 

“Morgan?” You asked again. He just barely glanced over at you. “The dark–why didn’t you tell me?” 

“It’s embarrassing,” he says after a beat. “I’m supposed to…It’s- It’s been seven years. I should be over this. My family went through it, but we’ve- we’ve all gotten through it. My dad’s told it to the whole congregation a million times, and- and I’m the miracle we thought would never make it. And we were completely unmarked by this…and here I am. Here I fucking am. And–and I almost had a fucking panic attack in front of my girlfriend because she turned the lights off.” 

“Nothing is embarrassing about that.” 

“That’s not for you to say, Y/N.” 

He was right…but you weren’t going to let him completely have it. “What- What I meant by that, is that there is nothing for you to be ashamed of. You’re afraid of the dark, okay? We all have something that we’re afraid of, and after what you went through? A fear of the dark is only to be expected. You have a reason for what you’re afraid of, look at me. I’m afraid of needles, I go manic every time I have to go to get a shot and I have had no experiences in the past to warrant this. There’s nothing wrong with me…and there’s certainly nothing wrong with you.”

He looked over at you, even though the light was dim, you could see him. See those beautiful eyes…and you couldn’t imagine after this what had happened then. It made you physically hurt to think that he was ashamed, even with something like this. 

“My sister doesn’t need one,” he argued.

“Your sister is barely old enough to remember what happened,” you countered.

“Why are you trying to make me feel better about this?” 

“Because this is normal. And I want you to know that there’s nothing wrong with you, and…and I love you, and all of this…although it’s not ideal, is nothing to be ashamed of. Didn’t Jesus Himself say to let our lights shine?” 

He smiled a little at that. “My dad would be proud of you for that.”

“It’s my goal in life, making your dad proud,” you laugh, it was a joke. “We’re gonna let our lights shine, and we’re gonna go to sleep…and I’m gonna make sure to remember that for the rest of our lives.” 

“Leaving the light to shine?” 

“Uh huh, never gonna let Satan blow it out.” 

“Okay,” he laughed at you…but you always had a way to make him feel better. “For the rest of our lives? That a promise.” 

“Technically we aren’t supposed to swear-” 

“Stop being a nerd-” 

“Fine…yes, it’s a promise. I’ll keep our light on. Every night, just for you.” 

He smiled. “I… I love you.” 

“I love you too, Morgan.”

[thoroughfvre]

i'm finally free until january fourth which means i should be around to write more and get to overdue dms ! i'm gonna get to current drafts gradually but here's a wishlist in case anyone wants to indulge me and my brain babies . . . please like this if you're interested and i'll get to you by the end of the week !

wanted concepts :

anything winter / christmas / new years eve . . . i need to get in the holiday spirit asap

maybe a mumu where there are workers and tourists at a ski resort or tourist-y town ??

strangers who share a nye midnight kiss and can't leave each other alone after

gen v inspired things / a mumu . . . i would prefer to play ocs but canons are welcome !

supernatural vibes ( as in creatures — not the show suhjskdij ) . . . can be serious or a little silly and goofy

road trip - esque plots ( i.e. our muses were road - tripping solo , met each other at a rest stop / gas station and decided to finish the trip together or two young adults / lovers / friends / siblings who don't feel like they fit in anywhere and decide to find their place in the world )

always a sl*t for fake dating or enemies to lovers

a costar for my actor muse . . . can go a million different ways

muses for any of my artsy babies ( i have a bunch of them ! )

battle of the bands . . . rival bands . . . musician things . . .

really anything from this tag .

muses i want to use asap :

apollo ortiz : small town guy who was a superstar in his prime , star baseball player , nearly drafted to the mlb but got injured and had to return home . currently teaches local high school / kiddie leagues and has a lot of anger in his heart . fc: jan luis castellanos .

adonis ' doni ' laurent : rich kid who grew up with shady parents who sheltered him from anyone and anything they didn't approve of . currently an actor ( can be aspiring or a - list depending on plot ) and has a bad habit of being dishonest . fc : harris dickinson .

victoria ' tori ' cabrera : my angel baby . . . my number one . . . i can never have too many plots with her . fashion intern , fashion student or stylist intern ( depends on plot ) with major mommy issues . a little spitfire who craves affection but has no idea what to do with it when she gets it . fc : nailea devora .

devon rhodes : an eccentric part - time art teacher and part - time art shop owner with a heart of gold . has no filter , lets whatever pops in her head fly out of her mouth or puts it into her art . still a bit new to me but i'm dying to write her . fc : taylor russell .

margot dai : very new . still fleshing her out . but a major aesthete who works in a florist shop and may even dabble in wedding planning . loves pretty things and watching them grow . would love to flesh her out with someone ! fc : havana rose liu .

malachi barone : very new x2 . i know very little about this man except that he's essentially a hermit , tends to come off as a bit pretentious and has an extensive knowledge of art as a curator . dying to write him and sort him out . fc : jeremy allen white .

[merakiui]

HELP ME YOURE CHILL you did accept my request actually . like right after I sent that !

I was sitting there for awhile after like 🧍‍♂️ oh wow I hope mera didn't take that the wrong way and thought I was just trying to get her to accept my request 😭 bc it was damn near immediate. tbh I thought you wouldn't answer that at all so that eases my brain a little. I am in your friends list tho! Lurking! I truly hope you enjoy my maxed jade 💜💜 he's my pride and joy :D! Even if you don't know which one he is lol

Speaking of actually!!! That twst Halloween thing... the leaks were deleted bc the poster got scared iirc (understandably so. as if work got back to aniplex/disney theyd probably make the game harder to datamine which is a Pain),, but they're still being kinda circulated around in private dms n stuff. So you'd have a hard time finding them if you Dod look for them really. I saw them and I do agree with the other anon though :-)!! I think you'll like it (also,, considering we're still slowly getting through the cast?? I don't think jade would be the ssr just bc he's already had one 💔 ohh but I do also hope for another event jade soon. my silly little creature I miss him!!!)

- :3 anon

Oh I did wanna add to my ask abt the leaks that we don't have the full cast yet?? So tbh it's still mostly up to guessing who's even getting ssrs, etc 💔

Aaa I'm hoping for a Floyd ssr this year personally since he doesn't have one yet . but there's no telling if he's even there this year :-( !!gosh I hope so. Especially looking at that little freak in the preview with the two heads and rolling pins?? Tho tbh?? Could just as much be like. Trey! He's missing an ssr too and he bakes!! Lots it could be aaaaa I'm so excited :D!!!

- :3 again

- - -

OH what unintentional timing!!! Σ(°ロ°) I'm happy I friended you!!! It would've chewed my intestines if I didn't and you were still waiting for me to add you back. T^T but it's a relief that's not the case!! Thank you very much for the max Jade!!!! I will use his power to charge into battle (gathering guest room supplies LOL). May my tako be of use to you!!! <3

I had to physically withhold from searching out the leaks, as difficult to find as they may be. I genuinely opened my writing notebook and started scribbling just so I could prevent the temptation from creeping up on me. >_< feeling like Rollo when he sees ankle for the first time....... </3 AAAAAAA I AM TOO CURIOUS. OTL

👀 oooo now I'm even more excited if you also think I will enjoy it!!! Knowing me and how easy I am to please, I already love it and I don't know anything yet. ^^;;; my heart may not be able to handle how amazing the event is sure to be!!!! AAAAAAAAA >0<

💔 not another SSR Halloween eel..... one can dream. I'm continuing to cling to the hope for Coral Sea event with SSR Jade. Aaaaa but I'm also hoping Floyb gets the SSR for this event!!! Or any of Savanaclaw because they've yet to have a Halloween SSR. :D I've been turning all kinds of characters over in my head trying to determine who might get the SSR (or SSRs if it's more than one). So many thoughts.......

Although I do hope at least one of the eels is part of the cast for the event!!!! Or Azul....... on second thought, they should just put all of the fish in the event (shameless favoritism). (ᵕ—ᴗ—)

[daincrediblegg]

I’ve been seeing some complaints about Hari’s wig so I’ve decided to use my arcane knowledge of Jared Harris images to rate some looks from 1 (I’m questioning my choices) to 10 (I’ve never been more right) in order to prove the point that that wig wasn’t even the worst look he's ever had. Not even close.

1. the jaz haz of receiving psychic damage. With the exception of the moustache he is perfectly fine (honey. Listen. It just doesn’t work in this case. ily) but also him making that face specifically like he’s psyduck personified is extremely funny to me. 7/10

2. He looks like he could conceivably be in mortal kombat??? But also his fatality move would be the lamest shit ever? Babygirl you don’t fight like that. Put those things down. You’re gonna hurt yourself. Simultaneously I feel like I’ve stumbled onto the set of a very strange porno from the 70’s and I’m actually a little uncomfortable (again. Honey. You can do better with the stache thing. I’ve seen it. There are some good images with you in a mustache. It’s not this one tho I’m sorry) 5/10

3. The fuckin wig. Listen. Y’all in the hair and makeup department do wonderful things on this show. Really. I mean that. But what made us say that this is the move? Who said “young Hari, huh? I know what to do” and then made him a fucking beatle in the worst way possible (though I can’t entirely fault them- wouldn’t be the first time he’s done this). Though I suppose they didn’t want us to forget that this show is a comedy, and at least they’re aware of that. 5/10

5. … who is he? He came out of the fucking woods with the most unimaginable stank and breath of haggis. I literally am completely baffled by his presence. Perhaps a little perturbed by it. Perhaps a little turned on. Who knows. Schrodinger’s rating: either 2/10 or 6/10 depending on how desperate I am

6. Literally the ideal man. I don’t know what to tell you folks but you’re lookin at him. He looks like he just stumbled out of an elton john houseparty at 3am and is still riding out his ecstasy high and if he asked me for my firstborn child I don’t think I or any godly creature could possibly refuse him. 100000/10

7. Orenge. This one I felt merited 3 consecutive images bc the frequency of this appearance astounds me. This man like my father before him has held onto his yellow sunnies from the 90’s for far too long. There has never been a more depression image ever shot than that first one and it was really mean of the person who took this to do that, but also it’s a mood somehow. Can’t shake the combo of this with the buzz tho like thats… buddy there are better choices. I am glad you are making them now but damn. 4/10

8. Danger Will Robinson… you’ve been assigned old man at birth by production crew. Even that benjamin button cunt didn’t have it this bad. EVEN WIG BOY HARI SELDON DOESN’T HAVE IT THIS BAD!!!! I deadass want to take him home and put him in a bath and make him bathe in conditioner for a week. 1/10

9. Now look here sonny jim. You can’t do this to him. Like I’m sorry. What was the logic here, disney? You make a man look so unabashedly GORGEOUS with the long red hair and the outfit and the whole thing? Only to have him say fuck all?? You don’t deserve him. NONE of you deserve him. I want to take him to a whore house in red dead redemption and fuck him silly. I want justice for the bitches that wronged him. 9/10

[the-s1lly-corner]

OOO what about a Dark Fey reader like Maleficent? that was being hunted down by a dangerous group of cryptid hunters, and had a broken wing n wounded by iron bullets but kept running.

And the Creeps found them took em in. and since ferfolk cannot lie,.. caught them off guard with a question on how they felt about that creep 😉

I expect to see Slenderman!👁👁 and another ig👍plz

idk I rarely see Supernatural like readers, it's a little disappointing imo. I love powerful self-inserts ok?

Slenderman with a Fey!S/o

UWAAAA I'm sorry for taking so long to get to this !! I've kinda been sucked up in a bunch of irl stuff !! (Nothing serious, just me working on things)!!

Admittedly I have never watched maleficent; so I'll solely be going off the info given in this ask I hope that's alright ☝️😔 and I apologize in advance if it's no good 😭💔

As you specifically brought up slenderman, he's gonna be our star today!! I was originally going to do the full list of characters but my brain js

A raisin

Also also!! I totally get what you mean ab the shortage of supernatural readers!!! Not just in the creepypasta fandom; but really any fandom! Let the insert have powers, let them be super strong, ect ect !!

You'd stumble into him after trying to hide and take shelter in his woods

Normally, he'd take down any trespassers after stalking them for a bit; but he was just too curious about you to make that the case

I dont know, I always think of slenderman to carry that kind of curiosity about the world and other creatures; I feel like that makes him more interesting than the fandoms standard "stern and oddly fatherly" take... also I just live the idea of curious cryptids!!

Moving on

He'd help patch you up with the resources in the forest; I've seen mixed opinions on whether or not slenderman has weird healing powers but personally; I think he has regen abilities that can only be applied to himself! Unrelated to the ask I know, but a quick little fun aside and little bonding point for him and s/o if they have the same deal going on

As for shelter? I'm personally still on the fence on if I wanna make the manor thing a part of my personal universe and hc that I write for these silly lads; but rn I've settled for a version of it! Not as grand or tidy as the old fandom hyped it up to be; it's a lil smaller and kinda... run down

Still livable, though, and you're more than welcome inside if you need somewhere to stay

Granted, I'm not entirely sure how the topic of romance would be brought up with him, but let's say he picks up on some behavior from you that makes him start putting together a picture

Bro has zero rizz I'm sorry

Regardless, he eventually asks the question; and as the rules go, you're kinda forced to tell him how you feel

I think regardless of if he reciprocates or expected your answer, he'd be surprised

I mean how many people are out here flirting with a forest monster, to their face

I think it could work, honestly! The relationship I mean!! I wish i had more hcs since this is such a fun idea, but I genuinely dont know much about fairy stuff and all the lore regarding them

But onto some more side hcs/little ideas to make up for the lack of stuff !!

If you need comfort, about the whole being hunted thing, slenderman is a good listener; and he understands what it's like, bro probably has to deal with people trying to get a look at him all the time. He gets it

Want revenge on them? Well if the hunters followed you into the woods they probably wont last long anyways; despite the whole curiosity thing he can be... rather territorial

Day to day life with slenderman is interesting as is, but with a fellow non-human companion? Shenanigans will likely ensue

What kind? Cant say, due to my lack of knowledge 😔☝️

Too injured to move around on your own? If you need to go somewhere slenderman will either fetch it for you, or just carry you to where you gotta go

Also he totally wont make it habit; even before the romantic relationship is fully formed

It just activates his neurons 😔

[roguishcat]

Snippet Sunday Monday

Thank you for the tag @heylittleriotact!

This is from Chapter 4 of 'Chasing Perfection', my slightly silly and occassionally angsty fic about Tav and Astarion being very much annoyed by each other's antics and hating each other until they come to realise that they don't.

“So, you are a vampire. And you were about to bite me,” she said matter-of-factly.

Astarion put his hands out defensively, trying to placate her. “It’s not what you think. I just need a little blood. I never drink from thinking creatures.”

“And I suppose I fall into the category of non-thinking creatures,” she said sarcastically.

“No, this is not what I meant. It’s just I’ve been weak lately, too slow. If I could just have a little blood, I would be faster, stronger.”

He looked apprehensive, but made no move to get away from her. Tav looked at the dark circles under his eyes and the slightly sunken cheeks, an earnest look in his eyes, a rare moment of vulnerability. It was probably all an act, but she found herself softening a little. Enough for her to consider the objectively stupid idea of offering her neck up to a vampire.

“Go on then,” she sighed.

“Really?”

“Yes, before I change my mind. I’ve already made enough bad decisions lately, what’s one more?”

Tav lay back onto her bedroll, not looking him straight into the eyes, staying still in spite of the sensation of his cold breath on her neck. Her dream still haunted her.

Perhaps she was a rotten egoist, but she did not want people dying because of her either. And not just because she wanted to survive. At some point, perhaps because she spent so much time listening to them whilst trying to get on their good sides, she actually started to care about her companions, in her own way.

So, she would scourge for artefacts for Gale, try to find a solution for fixing Karlach’s heart, perhaps discover a way to break Wyll’s contract with Mizora, and so on, and so on. Gosh, it was quite a list, wasn’t it? And she would be Astarion’s  portable blood bank for now. Make sure that he was in his peak form and an asset. At least she could do that for the group.

Completely no pressure tags, just in case someone wants to take part @preciouslittlebhaalbae @sorceresssundries @fangbangerghoul @orangekittyenergy