#I think this is the first time I've posted a selfie in like. at LEAST 6 years

[autumngracy]

Waited in line for over 2 hours and all I got was this dumb little sticker 🩵

[cactuslester]

okay!!! oakland show post!

i had so so much funnnn it was the best night ever!!! i went alone and was pretty nervous because even though ive been to shows and concerts alone before, i'd never been to something that had so much "waiting time" like between the m&g and preshow & show, but truly everyone was so so friendly, and it was so easy to meet people and make friends in line, so if anyone is still wondering if they should get a ticket and are worried about going alone, DO IT. it's so worth it, and phannies are lovely <3

so the m&g! this is my first time meeting both of them so i was so nervous and so excited. the line moved faster than i was prepared for it to (sarah was at the front of the line making sure everyone had their cameras ready and knew what they wanted to get signed. i'm so face blind i kept thinking about how familiar she looked but didn't realize that was sarah until it was almost my turn lmaooo), but the actual interaction didn't feel rushed. i gave them the letters i had written for them. i had tried to get metallic green envelopes but couldn't find any, and i told them that, and dan immediately knew what i was talking about and pointed knowingly at phil lmao <3

i brought tabinof and a mini lesbian flag which was between the pages in case they'd have time to sign both and they did! while they were signing i asked my questions. i asked phil for book recs and he said project hail mary, which i think he's mentioned in a preshow before. he said it's space/sci fi and he really liked it. i asked dan his thoughts on this f1 season, and he said "i think it's been quite a good season! it started off and it was like 'max is gonna win everything' and then it was like 'no he's not 🤪'"

and then dan took our selfies, and i'm rly happy with how they turned out 🥺 so here's them being cute sans me lol

they are indeed really good at making you feel comfortable and just generally being very nice and chill. they sounded more british than i was expecting? which is crazy given i allegedly know exactly what they sound like having watched their videos for 12 years, but still, hearing it up close was still kinda crazy. they are indeed very spindly, im glad i wore platforms so i was at least a little bit taller than i usually am

i Did forget to ask phil my follow up question which was if he would ever do a book recs video/livestream, and i also forgot to tell them that the sappy shit and also some recs for boston food is in the letters, but w/e they'll read those sooner or later, and at least i rmred the most important things. oh also phil's blue eyed stare really is So intense, i can definitely see how his aura can be intimidating (but he rly was so sweet <3). dan is so teddy bear vibes though, not intimidating at all <3

i was towards the end of the m&g line, so after my m&g ended, preshow started ~45 minutes later. the energy at this preshow felt rly married and silly, it was so fun. they definitely have someone prune the phlit questions (but im not sure if whoever does it just grabs them randomly or if they actually read and pick which ones dnp read), since not all of my questions were answered. but i cant complain bc they answered two of mine, which i'll post the videos for tn. but i asked if they're digital hoarders, and they said no (liars), and then dan talked about how phil's desktop is disorganized. and i also asked about their fave recent horror movie, and they both said the substance, which i've been wanting to watch!

and oh my god the show itself was CRAZY. like even though i've been looking at spoilers this entire time, i still wasn't fully prepared (maybe i'll put my more spoilery thoughts in a reblog later). they were so energetic, and their stage presence is magnetic. i think it was a good night for them, as far as i remember, no lines were obviously Forgotten, and any tripping over lines was minor. the show had silly parts, it had serious parts, it was just so Them. you really can feel how comfortable and happy they feel in this new era and, like they talked about in the phukbang, that they feel that their audience is truly Theirs now. the show was so good i Did log onto ticketmaster and google flights to san diego after work today but due to flight prices and work, i fear it's not happening, but god i do want to see it again immediately 😔

finally, thank you to all the wonderful phannies i met!!! i had such a lovely time chatting w/carolina, esmeralda, orion, and winter, who aren't on tumblr 😔 and of course with molly @finalfeudfiend!!! we were seat neighbors, partners in phannie crimes for the night, and also they took my m&g video (mwah mwah tysmmmm molly <333). it was really so great to meet everyone, and all my worries about going alone were totally unfounded <3

here are the bracelets and photocards i got! the far left bracelet is from the vip merch bag, and the rest are from phannies, they say super amazing project, sister daniel, and father philip. i am sooo happy with my photocard pulls. the top row were from the pack that came w/vip merch, and the bottom row i got separately. impossible to pick faves really, but some of mine are of course uni hoodies, holographic hearts tongue out phil, phil looking so polite, and smiley peace sign dannie <333

and that's that! much love to dnp and phannies for making it such a wonderful night. having watched their videos for so long, it was so special to get to see and meet them, i had the best time ever <333

[millennialsarecoolkidz]

Shipping should be fun, for the shippers and the shipped. I'll never try to policing feelings or thoughts but the fandom needs to learn to behave. If your emotions or thoughts make you a hater, you need to step back (and go to hell maybe). On the other hand, critical thinking is fair game and I would like to address two rebukes against Nic I've seen a lot lately: the hic given by relationship with a big age gap and the gaslighting towards fans.

First, the issue with age gap is definitely a real one. My problem is that she hasn't confirmed her relationship with Jake. What we know is what she has said in interviews: that she thinks people at Jake's age are babies / too young for her. When she's asked about her crushes, she always chooses people age appropriate and, for what we know, it would be the first time she's with someone that young. And even if she's with him, she seems to try to deviate that narrative. I mean yes maybe Jake was on her lock screen but she didn't want it to be seen. What she wanted us to see was her picture with Golda, holding her hand with intertwined fingers. What she wanted us to know is that she feels lucky when she can bring friends to events and talk with them as they are getting ready. And she made it clear that she wasn't happy with the pap pics and that DM is often BS. So, at least, she's clearly not promoting this kind of relationship. Maybe because they are not dating, maybe because she wants privacy or maybe because it could hurt her professionally. The point is: she sees the issue and is not sending the message that this kind of relationship is unproblematic.

I read also a lot, especially on Twitter, that she's not consistent and that she is gaslighting fans. It is said about two topics: her ask for privacy and the Lukola shipping.

About her asking for privacy and the way she brings Jake everywhere, and used her relationship with Luke to promote a show, I'll say what I've already said about her behavior with Jake, she won't change her behavior because of what we are saying. She's unashamedly herself, we love it when it's about her political awareness, her cute unhinged behaviors, her Queen statements, ... So we can't be mad at her when it's about Jake. If she feels she's right, she won't be afraid of the consequences, we've seen it with her advocacy for Palestinians. And she's kinda right here too, there is a difference between what is given and what is taken from you, there is a difference between stories posted by her, pics taken with her consent and stolen pics. Yes you can act accordingly to reality (and hide your bf/ rumored bf because there is no privacy when you are a celebrity) or you can act accordingly to your values and what you think reality should be. Nic has made her choice.

She's also accused of gaslighting fans about her relationship with Luke.

First I've read that she's hurting Luke when she entertains the ship while he stays quiet. It's crazy how people don't have memory when it's about sm. Luke does it too guys, and he's probably the one who keeps me on the ship because yes it's less often but it's crazier imho. Of course there are the jealousy, the staring, the check on her boobs, the bum pinching, the sneaky touchings, the moment in Brazil when he was putting Nic's hand on parts of his body that are not for friends or the infamous "I could be the Ken for hEeErr" (among other crazy things), but given the timing, let's say it was all PR (it wasn't). But after the 90 days, we had the story with the bloopers which he had to download from Twitter then cut to post as stories on IG (why Luke why?), the 3rd October post which doesn't make sense without the Lukola context, and the shared selfie. (We can also speculate about the wink to Nic biscuits'post in his Spain dump, the copy of Nic's font, the use of the Xx/xx, the "somewhere in Mayfair", his hands in HB post about Nic's fitting, ...). Yes it's less Lukola/polin content than Nic but look at his sm activity, proportionally it's huge. He barely posts about his fashion appearance, criquets about Viana, some hotel promotions and that's it, the rest is about Lukola (not even Polin in fact). So no I don't think Luke is hurt by Nic entertaining the shipping, they're doing it together.

So some fans feel betrayed by Nic because she has posted some Easter eggs implying she's dating Luke. I think it's unfair to say that. I agree she hasn't completely shut down the "more than friends" allegations. She keeps saying the same as they were saying during the tour: they are friends (not just friends) and blablabla about the unique relationship they have and that there is love, and oc no mention of a partner. So no, she's not really closing the door, but she's definitely not saying something is happening rn. And let's be honest, she has friendzoned Luke a lot. I'm the first one saying it always has been coupled with mixed messages, again not closing the door but not saying something is happening. The other Easter eggs are songs, the ring, the font, and a few posts about how great Luke is, the polaroid and the shared selfie. Nothing saying they are together rn. Everything about: Luke is important to her, and is kinda always on her mind. I'm not saying it's crazy to be a ring truther or to say the meeting with her family was meaningful, there are hints showing you could be right but you can't be sure. So you can't blame Luke and Nic if you were wrong and didn't understand their message.

I'm not a hypocrite, yes they're playing some games with the shipping, but it could just be fan service. It would be unfair to say they've said they were together.

Now why are they doing it and why don't they clarify their relationship with Jake and Antonia? Big question and that post is already way too long...

[sillyyprinc3ss]

Million Dollar Man

leon kennedyid! (or or di) x femreader!

tag: sugar daddy! -but he doesn't pays cause he sucks- call sex! praising! also I would say feeling used...?and I think that would be it...

wc: 4.2k

note: uhm this is my first ever try so like if it's bad don't go after me... also he is kinda a douche bag and the situation is something that actually happened to me... -not all but i got inspiration from my life events cause it is that interesting, it sucks -

03:14

“Great…” You mutter to yourself as you see the blinding red lights of your alarm clock. It shines as if it was making fun out of you. You should really pull your shit together.

You look at it slowly calculating (you weren't quite a genius) how much time you had left to go on that stupid job interview. “You should really get a job, it's not that hard.” Everybody says, but they don't really get it. Yes, you want to get a job, and everytime anyone asks you about it it just makes you want to crawl your skin off. But of course you just flash a soft smile and say: “I've been working on it.” Bullshit. But who cares? You don't and no one should either.

You breathe softly trying to fall asleep. Inhale…Exhale…Inhale… “This doesn't work.” You try some more. Inhale…Exhale… You give up and roll around the bed to go and get your phone.

03:27.You see as you turn it on, once again the numbers just look like they are mocking you, who wouldn't? You browse around your phone. Instagram, as soon as you click on it you are getting out. Twitter, aww cute cat pic, “Same bestie same” you comment under a post of a girl you don't really know but you are moots with her or whatever. Tumblr, the writer you like hasn't posted anything, you log out.

You sigh softly, as your rotting brain thinks of something entertaining to do. Right then you remember you and your supposedly best friend (she probably hates you, everyone does) logged into some sketchy local “Findmeasugardaddy.com” type of web.

You try to log in. Error, the password inserted does not match up with the email address provided.“What was the damn password…” You say talking to yourself as if it was going to help you in something. You try again, entering successfully this time. You try to figure out how to see your profile, you surprisingly do it in no time.

“sillyprinc3ss18” Wow. You think to yourself, you look at the profile picture, your friend convinced you to upload one of your selfies. “Girl, you should put one of your pics. Bet that would attract more old men.” To be fair, you were quite a cutie, not much tits but a desirable ass.

Sadly you fucked up any chance with any guy, when you opened your mouth. You were weird, creepy even, (no offense) as pretty as you were you couldn't really bag any guy. So you reluctantly accepted after she insisted on it for a little.

You decide that that's enough of examining your profile as you read your bio: “8teen girl who isn't scared of being a little naughty…” Gosh I suck, you think to yourself. “Gosh I suck.” You say out loud this time, trying to express your feelings I guess.

You click on another page, “Hm… IM’s.” You say clicking on it, slightly nervous cause you really didn't know what to expect. Well unfortunately or by surprise… 0.

“0…? I thought desperate older men were here.” You say quite hurt by it. Not even a desperate old cranky man wants you? That's pathetic, but guess what's pathetic too? Exactly, you! You are pathetic really.

As you start to have an inner monologue as if you'll ever die a virgin or you should become a nun and embrace your fate, a red dot comes up in the IM section. You look at it for at least 5 seconds, blink a few times, just making sure this wasn't an hallucination from lack of sleep. Ok, so there's probably a mildly ugly old man who wants to chat with you. You balance your options and sort them out. Option 1, you open the IM and answer the guy who could be your father. Option 2, you ignore the IM, turn off your phone and be a responsible adult and sleep to not be a zombie on your job interview. Option 3, jerk off at the thought of an older man wanting to chat with you. (Hey I don't blame you! You have a terrible dad.)

You consider your options. “Hey maybe he's cute” you think to yourself, to be honest you always had a thing for men who could barely pull a hard on. You click on the red dot. “L3onK77 wants to text you. Accept the request?”

“Yes” “No”

You stare at the two options, slightly grateful at the double questioning the page is putting you through. You take a big breath and click on “Yes”

“- Hi there sweetheart. How are you?”

Wow, “sweetheart”... You would confront him on the pet name but you know better and to be fair an old guy calling you sweetheart makes you a little a horny… More than you would like to admit.

“- uhm… hi. i'm fine a little bored tbh.”

Not more than 10 seconds pass before a text pops up on your phone screen.

“- What a pity. Maybe I could entertain you a little, what do you say angel?”

“Angel” Wow. Just wow, you dirty little whore, your panties are getting wet just by the thought of it. You stare at the message for some time, enough time to make the older man type another text.

“- Guess that was pretty straightforward, sorry if I came out that strong. Let me just take it to the point and give you a preposition.”

Some seconds pass and he sends another message.

“- Since you are on this website I'll make it straight and easy. Would you be interested in becoming a sugar baby? Mine to be exact.”

Wow, thought maybe he was going to ask for nudes but he wants to pay you for just being pretty.

“- i don't know really… why would you want to do that in the first place?”

“- Cause I think you are damn cute. And would love to have a pretty little thing under my care.”

You are blushing. Oh my god, he is smooth. Should be named L3onK007, cause he is smooth as a spy.

“- i don't know :s what would I have to do in order to become your sugar baby…”

Tried to not seem so eager, but you were 2 seconds from becoming a gymnastics gold medal athlete from how many backflips you were about to do.

“- Glad you ask. Well it's really easy, you just have to give me your attention and loyalty. Can you do that for me angel?”

“- sure, seems like a good deal.”

You answer almost instantly, gosh you were such a whore for male attention, for any attention really.

“- Good girl. I'm Leon, but you shall call me Daddy. How would you like me to call you?"

“Leon…” You say out loud as soon as you see it on your screen. That's a nice name. “Is it moanable?” You ask yourself, will have to check later if an opportunity takes place.

“- uhm my name is [ ]… but you can just call me princess ig.”

“- Nice to meet you [ ]. And how old are you if you let me ask?”

“- just turned 18 like a month ago… what about you?”

You kind of panic when he doesn't answer right away. “Gosh I should have lied about my age… He probably thinks I'm a brat and a- Oh! He answered back!”

“- 18? Well you are just a baby aren't ya’ ? Happy late birthday then sweetheart. And answering your question, I just turned 47 some days ago. On the 31 to be more exact.”

Forty-fucking-seven. Forty seven years. Four. Seven. Holy shit, if you are lucky he’ll still have some hair on his scalp.

“- oh… happy late birthday too ig! could i ask you something tho?”

“- Sure thing sweetheart, ask till your little heart's content.”

“- could i see what you look like? im really curious…”

You type nervously, could never give love to an ugly man. You could be dumb, but not stupid.

“ - Well I guess you haven't seen my profile, cause I have my photo on there.”

Shit, now he thinks you are stupid too. You quickly go to his profile, close your eyes as you wait for his profile to load up. You stay some seconds with your eyes closed, you give up and tentatively open one of them. And holy heavens! The guy is a total babe, could be an American sweetheart and everything. You look at the profile pic, a photo of him with a fish he just catched. Total dad vibe. Gosh you hit the jackpot! Rich, hot, dilf. (Could be a Lana Del Rey song really) You look at it for about a minute more, his message pops up. Okay girl, you got to lock in.

“ - you are very good looking :3”

“ - Well thank you. But you are quite a sight for sore eyes darling ;).”

Holy shit! You have it in the bag girl. Now all you have to do is sit still and be pretty. “Don't fuck it up!” You think, and oh boy, if you fumble this up you could never forgive yourself, might as well kill yourself!

“- and… how are we going to this…? i mean this website is kind of shitty :/”

“- Yeah you are right princess. Here.”

“- (XXX)XXX-XXX.

“- That's my number, add me and we will talk about it.

Yeah if you fumble this you are definitely going to kill yourself. You quickly open your messages app and insert the number he just gave you with trembling thumbs. You triple check the number just in case. You add the contact as “Leon Sugar”.

“ - hii ^w^ it's me [ ]”

After no more than two seconds he answers. He is maybe eager for this too.

“- Hi baby. Wanna call?”

Right then your world just froze. Holy fucking shit. This guy is really being serious, and you can't do anything to prevent an unhealthy attachment that is taking place right fucking now.

“- uhh, hold on…"

“- Okay baby, just tell me when.”

Not just a minute passes when you text back.

“- okay im ready!”

Just as you hit send he calls you, you panic, a stab to the heart could have got a lower squeal out of you. You pick up after a few tones.

“Hi…?”

He immediately speaks, holy fuck his voice! Cult leader type of voice, deep and smooth like the purest silk from god knows where…You remain silent for some seconds.

“You there?”

“Sweetheart?”

You almost moan to the sound of his voice. Gosh, pull it together.

“Sorry… I just panicked for a while.” You say in a soft voice. You thank the heavens above that he can't see your face right now.

“Well aren't ya’ a sweet little thing?” He lets out a deep and rich chuckle, striking directly to your heart, and from your heart to your cunt. “Do I make ya’ nervous…? Is that why?” He says in a teasing voice.

“A little…” You admit with a slight crack on your voice.

“And why is that?” He asks right back, his voice somehow lowering at least an octave.

“I-I don't know… Cause I've never done anything like this at all…” You answer, thinking before you speak for once in your life, impressive.

“How can a pretty girl like ya’ never be pampered huh…? Next thing ya’ goin’ to say is that you never kissed anyone.” He speaks in the same tone as earlier. It was making you melt, transforming your brain into a mushy pink paste with glitter (cause let's face it, you certainly do not have many brain cells.)

“Uhm…” Damn he got you, bet he thinks you are a weirdo.

“...” A long silence stumbles upon the call. “You kiddin’?” He says after a few seconds.

“No… Daddy.” You say making a big pause before you call him like he asked to be called some minutes earlier, “Gosh it feels so weird…” You think to yourself.

“Well isn't that lovely? He says with a lighthearted chuckle. “So that makes ya’ a virgin too huh…?” He teases you again.

“...” Your silence says it all.

“Well sweetheart, let me tell ya’ that you shouldn't be embarrassed of it.” He says as he could sense your emotions through the call.

“But it's still embarrassing… You probably think that I'm a weirdo. No guy ever calls me back after a first date, they think I'm weird.” You say with a deep sadness in your voice.

“Well maybe ya’ are so weird cause ya’ just the peak of beauty, darling. Let me tell ya’, I wouldn't even care if you shot me I'll still be interested in ya’,.” Gosh he sounds like a Dad. Bet you aren't the only one calling him daddy.

You stay silent for a moment, his words sinking into the back of your brain. Maybe he was right.

“Hey, I have an idea.” He says as you think about what he had just said. “What about if we do a video call…? Maybe we can both loosen up.” He asks, his voice turning into a teasing flirty tone, leaving back the lighthearted voice he just spoke with.

Yeah no shit. This is really doing a 180° on your life. Your mind tries to run with all the possibilities you can think of, like one and a half to be exact.

“Uhm… Okay. Just wait a minute…” You say with a little bit of panic in your voice. “Gotta tidy my room a little…”

“Sure honey. Just tell me when ‘kay…?” He says with a voice that could make even a dentist have cavities.

You quickly incorporate yourself and look at the clock on your nightstand. “4:02” You say just loud enough for you to hear it. You run to the bathroom and inspect yourself in the mirror. “I can't put on makeup… Who could believe I look like that at 4 A.M…”. You slip your panties down and sit on the toilet, you look at the cute pair of panties as you take a quick piss. “I should wear a push-up bra… He won't notice…”. You quickly pace to your bed once again.

“Leo-” You stop yourself ashamed. “I mean… Daddy.” You say as you try to get him to give you his attention.

“Ya’ done baby…?” He says in a silky voice, somehow making him sound even hotter.

“Uhm… Yeah…” You say quickly putting on a push-up bra and a clean skimpy tank top. The ruffling of the clothes being heard by him.

“Ya’ undressin’ for me or somethin’ baby…?” He teases with a chuckle as low as a thunder.

“Uh- N-no…” You answer immediately with a soft yelp. “I was just changing into something more comfortable…"

Right then your phone begins to ring again. “Leon Sugar wants to video call you. Accept?” You see on your phone along with a bright green button. You bite your lip nervously and finally push the button for the video call to pull through. You quickly turn off your camera as you wait for it to connect.

After some seconds you see him. A little bit rougher than the photo but still good enough to eat. He moves his phone sideways so you could see him better. Wearing a dark blue rob that did nothing to cover his chest really, he had more tits than you, ouch. “Sweetheart?” He says placing his phone somewhere so it could stand on his own. “I can't see ya’ baby…” He says furrowing his brows as he looks closer to the screen of his phone.

You look around making sure there's nothing embarrassing to be ashamed of, no panties or plushies on the camera frame, alright.

“Uhm… Just a second my wifi is kind of bad…” You say as you look last time in a mirror that was in your room. You hesitantly look at the camera button, you click it and a small loading bubble appears, the camera is now on.

A soft whistle can be heard from the other side of the line. “Wow…” He says in a soft voice, a smirk plastered on his chiseled face. “Now I'm really curious about ya’…” He says looking unashamedly at the small part of cleavage you were kindly showing just for him. “Ya’ said ya’ changed for me… huh?” He's starting to sound like a frat boy now…

While he was talking you were more focused on how you looked on the camera. “Uhm.. Yeah.” You say shyly batting unconsciously your lashes. “My pajamas weren't a great option, y’know…?” You realize how your voice becomes more high-pitched, candied almost. You realize you are smiling foolishly in the camera, you stop and lock in. “So about the money-”

“Oh yeah the money…” He looks like he just discovered the cure for cancer. “How much would ya’ want your allowance to be…?” Is he really saying this? Might as well bankrupt him just by being pretty.

“Oh…” You say with your pretty lips forming a perfect circle. “Well I don't know really…” You say with a surprised look plastered on your face. “How much would you be willing to give me…?”

“How much do ya’ want? Name it, and I'll give you… until my last penny angel.” He says with a smug grin on his face.

“Uhm… Is 500 a lot…?” You ask, biting your lip nervously. “I really don't know… I'm sure I'm asking too much for just company and loyalty-”

“Ya’ got it, 500 weekly.” He says with a cheeky smile, almost endearing if it wasn't because you just met the guy and he's literally paying for your company.

“...500…1000…1500…” You count in your airy head. “Uhm isn't that quite a lot for a month…? That's more than the average check…”

“Well princesses need a lot of money to survive don't they…? To buy frilly dresses and pretty panties-”

“That's still too much money… Daddy…” Calling that it's still so unnatural, like giving a monkey mom a kitten to care for. “I meant like per month or so…” You say to him while looking elsewhere than the phone camera.

“Don't be silly, princess…” He says giving a soft sigh to the world. “Like I said- I want to take care of ya’, provide for ya’… To pamper ya” really. Treat ya’ like the princess ya’ are!” Whilst he was saying a monologue typical of a 40’s husband when his wife wanted to have a job, you were way too busy looking at his tits-

Oh my god… He may have double D’s. “Baby…?” He says snapping you out of your titty world.

“Uh… Yeah…?” You say blinking the nasty thoughts away, you doe eyes looking even more dolly than before. “Sorry I got distracted- So it will be 2 grand a month…?” You say trying to change the topic.

“That's right. Gonna spoil ya’ rotten darlin’.” He answers with a triumphant smile.

“But that's like, a ton of money… Like a TON.” You say with a soft frown looking at the total babe, *uhum*, handsome man that was on your screen.

“Daddy works for giving his little girl what she needs baby, to pamper her and spoil her, I've already said that honey.” He says growing rather irritated by your constant questioning.

“Yes I know it's just- I can't really conceive the idea of being paid just cause I'm pretty… It's like cheating! I feel like an imposter…” Doe eyes batting through the camera making his heart stop, then the tension went to his brain and then to his cock. Oopsies!

“Princess…” He says in a soft voice, almost like he was telling her daughter there wasn't any monster under her bed. “I know this is new…” Suddenly he stops talking, presumably thinking about something, soon after he speaks again. “Well maybe ya’ can do somethin’ for me…”

Your lost gaze that wandered around your room like you've never seen it before comes back to the screen quickly. “Yeah…?” You ask rather skeptical of what he was about to propose.

“When was the last time ya’ touched your princess bits, sweetheart…?” He says without mincing words. “Uhm…” You freeze, ok didn't think he would ask that wow… You wait a little before answering his bold question. “I-I don't really remember it…” You are such a liar! You were literally humping your pillow before deciding it was time to go to sleep. You quickly look at the right corner of your phone, 4:29. “You know it's kind of late and tomorrow I have a job interview…”

“Oh it won't be long princess… I just want to guide ya’…” He coos lovingly at her with a mellow voice. “I want ya’, to touch for me darling… Let me talk ya’ through it m’kay…?” As much embarrassing this seems to you, you can't help but want to please him. “What do ya’ say angel…?” You just nod frantically as you slide your panties down. He sees you shift in your position. “Show Daddy your panties darlin’, show to the camera how cute they are, hmm…?”

As soon as you had slided them off your dripping cunnie you show them to him, light blue with a bow at the front, cute, but what caught his attention was the visible wet patch it had formed. He whistles softly. “Ya’ got wet even without doing dirty talk baby…Your kitty is so good darling… I can smell it from here.” He says with a charming frat jock smile, you could bet your soul he was one in his teen years, but anyways. “Now use your pretty fingers and circle your nub, you know where that is hmm..?” He asks you as he was asking a dog if he was a good boy. You nod softly. “I knew you would, my smart girl…” He says while slowly palming himself through the thin fabric of his pajama trousers. You start letting out soft whimpers, catching his attention every time while he was trying to focus on himself. “Can ya’ show daddy your princess parts darlin’...?” You stop your motion looking directly into your phone camera. “Ya’ didn't like that huh…” He says with a sour chuckle. “Well don't worry darlin’, ya’ don't have to show me anything ya’ aren't comfortable with, ok princess…?” You just nod shyly and kept moving your fingers.

“Fit one of them in, c’mon baby…” He says with now, his cock out, but out of view from the camera of course, he's a gentleman after all! As he sees your face contorting -your puffy lips in a soft pout and your brows furrowed while you looked shyly at him through the device- he begins to pump his length up and down, just like he knows he likes. Your soft whimpers feeding his ego, therefore making his blood pump more and more to his brain below the waist. He just closes his eyes for a moment, the next second he opens them he is cumming non-stop to your airy moans and mewls. Guess he isn't the stallion he used to be in his twenties, gosh even thirties…

He looks at the time 4:52. He grunts softly, cleaning his hand on the side of the rob he was wearing. “Baby…” He says in a husky voice, making you stop, just when you were about to reach the peak! “Y-yes Daddy…?” You say slowing down your finger pumping. “I-I gotta go sweetie… It's late and I have a big money meeting tomorrow… okay?” You completely stop, was he literally telling you to fuck off cause he already cummed…? No, but you are overreacting in your mind, feeling so used and not even getting a reward out of it. But you just softly smile and say “It's alright, I understand it…” You say with a fake soft voice. “I knew you would understand it sweetheart…” He says with a pleased smile. “I'll text you tomorrow m’kay…? Love you, bye.” He quickly says and hangs up, not even giving you a chance to object about it, maybe that's why he did it that way.

Anyways now it's almost 5 am, and you have to wake up like… in an hour maybe…? Got to dress cute, cause “firsts impressions last”, not too prudy but also not showing your bra, you decide to get your shit together and walk to the bathroom to wash your face, you change into something more formal, a tube skirt and white crisp shirt, a short heels and you are on the go. How come with even extra time you are running late…? You take the bus, yeah, people stare at you, yeah, deal with it. You finally arrive at your destination after several bus stops, a corporation building, they say they were looking for a secretary… Who knows it could be like the movie and you start having a BDSM relationship with your boss and-

“Miss, Mr.Kennedy will see you now…” The assistant says from behind her desk, giving you a soft smile,you analyze her, she is truly an american beauty, high standard chick from uptown for sure. After her fake smile disappears you walk to the door of your probably next boss office. You knock on it twice, a husky rumble saying “Come in…” traveling through the sound waves. You slowly open the door, greeted by the back of Mr.Kennedy as he looked through the windows the city at his feet, he slowly turns around, his eyes slightly opening up further as he realizes who he is, she frowns softly, her mouth opening, ready to speak.

“Oh darlin’ thought I told you I was going to be the one to reach out to you didn't I…?”

[putschki1969]

2024/09/21 Blog post by Wakana いよいよ明日です！！〜前髪と屋形船と鬼面角〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

It's Finally Tomorrow！！〜Bangs, Houseboats and Cacti〜

Finally… Finally…The bud on my cactus has bloomed‼️(for reference, check out Wakana's Instagram post from Sep 13)

The flower of a Peruvian apple cactus!!! �� It's beautiful…😭✨It really looks like the flowers of my Queen of the Night😊You can see how big it is compared to the palm of my hand. I'm so happy that such a big and beautiful flower has bloomed…😭✨I took a ton of pictures, so I'll post some today and the rest on another day (I want everyone to see them). I'll also post something on Instagram today, so please take a look at that too😊

Well, yesterday at the agency office, we had a final meeting for the upcoming FC event “Join Wakana! Houseboat Full-Course Tour”! ＼＼\٩( 'ω' )و //／／We've prepared an event that everyone can enjoy together… so please look forward to it! ! (((o(ﾟ▽ﾟ)o)))

Also, I've used the opportunity of being at the office to once again take on a selfie challenge 📸 It's already been a month since I got my bangs…I'm finally getting used to them😊 (I changed my smartphone recently so now I have Totoro on the back). My bangs are currently at a length where they are starting to bother me since they get in my eyes *laughs* It's been a while since I had bangs and I know why because my bangs are stubborn and wavy so it's really hard to keep them straight 😅I've been struggling with it every day for the past month…(Yesterday, I finally styled my bangs properly for the first time in a while. The styling was so robust that my bangs didn't get messy even when I walked outside in the heat…) For everyday hairstyles, bangs are really convenient and fun to arrange, but they're a real hassle 😅And I realised it would be impossible to have my bangs down for a live show 😂 I feel like they'd start to lose shape within the first few minutes of a concert😂 So… after thinking about it for a long time…I decided to just let them grow out again 🤣🤣 Major fail. Everyone, I am sorry to tell you that tomorrow and the day after tomorrow will be your last chance to see me with bangs😂 Please forgive me *laughs* Honestly, just thinking about a live performance is making me realise that bangs are just too difficult for me 😂

Last but not least, on my way home yesterday, I came across a lovely event taking place near my office, so here are some photos of it 📸 I have also posted a video on Instagram, so please check that out♡ (Wakana's Instagram post from Sep 20).

Even the entrance are for the event looked exciting😊 You can enjoy a drink on the grass while laying on a mat 😊The surrounding shops were also bustling. It was hot but everyone was drinking beer and having fun, I was jealous watching them 😊 I feel a little sad to see events like this and realise that the end of summer is near.

Those who have plans to join me on the houseboat tour, I'm looking forward to meeting you tomorrow or the day after tomorrow! ! ＼(^o^)／

Until next time ☆( '▽')/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

2024/09/17 Instagram post by Wakana

I went to Odaiba 🚢🗽🌉 #LifeWithBangs (Source)

[ingravinoveritas]

Oh, boy. Well, I've had a few people show this to me today, and again, it's...yeah. A lot.

The first thing that caught my notice is that this picture seems to be from the outing Michael and AL did with Georgia and David last weekend at Lapland UK (if the matching Christmas sweaters and Michael's furry hat are any indication, at least). Why a picture from then was posted today instead of a current one, I'm not sure, but I did think that was an interesting choice.

The second thing that came to mind is something I probably don't even need to say because it seems like others are noticing it, to where I saw folks on Twitter actually commenting, "Why does he look so tired and unhappy?" It sort of boggles my mind that Anna would post a picture where this is so visibly the case, but then it's also not surprising, because it seems like yet another instance of her making sure that her hair/makeup is on point while seemingly not caring whether Michael looks good in the picture. And again, the "husky" comment would hit a lot differently if it weren't for Anna's Insta story from a month ago comparing him to a dog. As it is, it feels like another passive-aggressive jab at Michael's appearance, which as we know by now is something AL has done many times over.

But what really struck me about this picture is that she posted it shortly after Georgia posted a Christmas Eve photo of her and David. When we look at that picture--as well as the picture of Michael and David that was also taken at Lapland last weekend--the difference is stark:

All I can say is that two of these three pictures look and feel like couples...and one of them distinctly doesn't.

David's expression is so soft in the picture with Georgia, he's leaning in to her, and you can feel the connection between them and that they are a combined "unit." Michael is utterly beaming in the picture with David and leaning in to him with his whole body. Yet in the picture with Anna, it's very much a case of them standing near each other but not at all being in the same place. It also almost looks as if Michael was doing something else and she insisted on a selfie, and this was the end result. Again, if we contrast all of that to the selfie Georgia took with David, the difference truly is night and day. I don't know what that may mean (if it means anything at all), but I'm genuinely baffled at AL's decision to post that picture.

The one other intriguing piece of all this is Georgia's comment, which we can see in the screenshot above. I've had a few folks DMing me saying they think it could be an indication of some sort of poly arrangement (that "better halves" means Georgia is referring to AL as her better half, and referring to Michael as David's better half). Whether this is remotely true is something only the four of them would know, but if nothing else, I do think the wording is just ambiguous enough to make one wonder.

So yes, those are my thoughts on this new picture. Happy for folks to weigh in and share their reactions in the comments, as always, and I will keep doing my best to get through the backlog of Asks still in my inbox...

[stellar-waves]

my forever flanery fix

So I met Sean Patrick Flanery...

And I gave him a lot of art...

And I fully embarrassed myself in the process...

But I made him smile. A lot. And obviously, he made me smile like an idiot.

Didn't help that I just kept going back to him throughout the day. Each time, I felt more and more comfortable and got to talk with him about anything and everything.

My guy filled my heart and my camera roll with a million selfies of us together. 💗

I know, I know, it's super cheesy to say "omg meeting him changed my life," but it really did. And as a result I'm going to rework some things around here re: my pseudo-anonymity and ownership of my artwork. I'll explain everything below the cut...

I totally fangirled and admitted that he was the reason I went to Florida, because I wanted to meet him so badly. It was literally my first convention ever. I had printed out the Boondock Saints artworks I did earlier this year, signed my real name, and gave them to Sean. Same with this graphite drawing of him as Connor. I met another fan of his who was so sweet and kind and supportive. I got to see so many awesome vendors and other artists and even buy some rad art. (to borrow a phrase from Rabbitt 💚)

It all got me thinking about how I tend to hide my true fangirl nerd personality in real life because I'm so deathly afraid of what other people think. Hence why here and even on Instagram, I lived anonymously as a big fan who makes all this art and writes all these silly stories and musings and I just...I don't want to hide anymore.

So my stellar-waves Instagram account is going to get phased out—I've already deleted some of the art I had posted to share later on my personal account.

As for Tumblr...I'm going to update all the art with my signature (literally initials but still). Because I won't lie, part of me is seriously considering doing commissions and potentially selling my fanart as prints and stuff...maybe even at a convention? I don't know what that will look like just yet as I'm not sure I'm quite ready to link my personal account here. Nor am I quite ready to share my real name. But I am a visual artist first, so that takes priority as far as serious business/social stuff.

I think some anonymity will still exist for the sake of my fanfiction. Because I still want to write. It's been a fantastic release for me over the past year, and something I genuinely missed doing. But not exactly something I want to invite a lot of people from real life to see...especially the man himself, though surely my dude is way too busy to even pay attention.

So nothing is really disappearing per se...at least not forever. Some things will just look different.

And I was right... Sean Patrick Flanery is a goddamn saint for real. 🩵

. . .

[stoopid-turtle]

Consuming Candies Pt. 1: GG and DD are le Gay

Everything is fake. I make up stuff for fun. Do not believe a word of it.

Intro post for this series

I'm a nerd so I feel I need to asterisk just about anything. Basically, this is my list of moments/candies that cemented for me a few things: 1) DD is hella gay; 2) GG is some flavor of gay; 3) that GGDD definitely had a thing around the time of the TU filming; 4) that they're still together.

1 and 2 are needed to establish 3 and, unless you go for a very different timeline than other turtles, 3 is needed to establish 4.

Such. A. Nerd.

I divided this up into 2 posts because I'm incredibly long-winded.

So, #1: DD is incredibly incredibly gay. There is no doubt in my mind. Here's why, in order with the most convincing moments first. Once I accepted these, the following points were easier to wrap my head around.

a) DD checked out another guy's ass at the Tencent Awards Night and exclaimed "Handsome" to his co-star.

Just what it says on the tin. I've watched these 5 seconds over and over, and I can't wrap my head around any other explanation. The man passes by, DD's eyes clearly sweep down, then he says "Shuai!" I'm usually skeptical of lip-readings, but this is unmistakable.

I put this as the most convincing for me because it's not a bts, there's no need for fanservice, it's an official stream of a video and there is literally no other way to interpret this. It's incredibly blatant. He's into men (and, notably, his co-star in LoF is clearly in the know since he makes the comment to her).

(Honestly, it makes me a little uncomfortable, because I've noticed DD has started covering his mouth when speaking to companions at public events, presumably so that fans can't try to read his lips. I'm sure he did not expect that ass-ogle to be noticed by anyone)

b) "I'm not talking about WWX, I'm talking about XZ." I discussed this in my turtle origin story, but this moment in the bts really knocked me over the head with that fact that DD was outright hitting on XZ. There was no way to interpret this as them joking around with the fact that their characters were in a BL relationship (a la the director referring to them as "lovebirds" or someone on the crew calling xz DD's "wife"). DD straight up flirts with GG. Gets turned down because the phrase he used was taken the wrong way. Then calls him "beautiful" (or "fairy-like"). When GG rejects this as not fitting WWX, DD just clarifies that he's talking about XZ not WWX. (Which, wow, what a line. DD is bold)

There's no het explanation for that moment, unless you want to posit that there was an intentional fabrication of fanservice (I address that issue elsewhere).

Add this on top of DD's other comments to XZ, calling him "erotic", asking for kisses, asking for him to sleep with him, declaring his love. A lot of this is joking around, but there's a safety in joking around when you're flirting with someone you like. You can retreat to the joke if they don't like it.

But this moment isn't even a joke. It's sincere. DD's flirting the fuck with GG.

It's not even hard to believe coming off a). DD is clearly into men. GG is very charismatic and seems to attract the attention of just about everybody who meets him (I get serious There's Something about Mary vibes from him sometimes in how people talk about him) (I am old. My references are old). Is it so hard to think that DD would shoot his shot?

He's on a cast with the guy, playing the love interest. They get along incredibly well. DD has a pretty high opinion of himself, to say the least. I'm not at all surprised he'd make a go for it.

There are several moments in the bts where GG teases DD for sending memes of himself (only the handsome ones) or sending (again, handsome) selfies of himself. It is funny, but it also strikes me as someone trying to get some reaction from his crush. It feels a little awkward to have GG openly teasing him about it but DD gets his revenge by showing off the pouty photo of GG, so he clearly managed to deal with it. (And GG clearly agrees that DD is handsome, so DD's text campaign worked)

c) The Nike rainbow shoes and ice cream.

Honestly, I wouldn't have this on here except for this post by potteresque-ire here on tumblr. Within the context in China at the time, and with the response DD received from his fans, it's clear that the rainbow Nikes + Ben & Jerry's were meaningful to DD. It's a shame that the political situation with Nike later required him to fall in line with the CCP and remove it, but I trust potteresque on the context that this post was a Big Deal.

d) His involvement with TU.

I've heard mixed things about the expectations for TU at the time of casting. The landscape for BL was rocky and the production company was unproven, but it was recognized that MDZS was a huge IP and so there was a chance that it could be a gigantic hit. There was also an equal risk that it would completely flop or not be allowed to air. Still, there's a fantastic interview with the non-GGDD cast of TU where the interviewer asks them if they knew that TU was going to be so big. There's a moment of awkward silence until somebody (I think WZC) just says, "No."

My understanding is that WYB was the biggest star they got on the cast. He had other opportunities, no doubt some that were more promising and that didn't result in him losing the support of his homophobic fans. But DD put his hat in the ring anyway.

Why? Maybe he wanted to roll those dice to see if he could sign on to something that would be huge. But he's also gay, and there's every possibility that he just wanted to act in a gay romance.

(This is putting aside some of the speculation that DD and GG knew each other or were even dating prior to casting.)

I bet he saw it as a rare opportunity to play a (censored) gay character, and he was willing to lose fans to do so (much like with the Nike post). DD is bold.

I go into this more when I talk about GG.

(Also, I don't know if he specifically went in for the LWJ role or if, like literally everybody else on that cast, he was trying to get the role of Xue Yang (srsly, what's up with this???), or if he just kept his options open)

e) He has no interest in women.

Just because a guy likes men doesn't mean he also doesn't like women. Except with DD, he seems to have 0 interest in women. At first, I could chalk this up to him being shy, not having much experience around girls, etc. But after a certain point, his clear disinterest has to be taken in consideration with his overt flirtiness and enthusiasm about men.

Basically, he doesn't have a problem with women. They're just not his focus in life or love. He doesn't light up around women. He lights up around men. I know this is real subjective, and that displeases my nerd heart, so the other points matter too, but this is really the heart of things. DD isn't interested in women.

Add onto this some implications he's made that he is...um...not sexually frigid (I tried to find this clip and was unsuccessful. Ah well.) and...well, you can't be shy with women and still be a horndog Leo if you're straight. That horndog energy is being directed somewhere else.

In sum, DD is just really, really gay. Don't hit me with those, "But his hobbies are so dudely" nonsense. Go meet some actual gay guys, list out their hobbies, then get back to me. DD. Is. Gay. Full stop.

#2. GG is some flavor of gay.

GG's always the more puzzling one. DD is so...loud and unapologetic. GG plays close to the vest.

I'm struck by some screenshots I saw of his university peers gossiping about him back in those days. People explicitly said he wasn't gay, so if GG was out back then, he was only out to a few people.

He came from a traditional family, and I get the vibe he was incredibly nervous at the idea of entering a gay relationship. I doubt he "didn't realize" he was gay until he met DD, because I think even the scaredest, most closeted person knows on some level that they're gay. But I think GG might have been set to remain in the closet for the long-haul.

There's an interview of GG done while filming where he's asked about DD (he smiles real big and it's really sweet). He gives the usual response of DD being slow to warm up to people, but when he's asked about his current impression, he exclaims that DD is "a lunatic" (I laugh every time I watch that). Then he comments that DD isn't scared to be "unconventional".

I can't say for certain, but it feels like it's in part a reference to DD being more bold with his sexual orientation. GG keeps things more buttoned up and close to his chest, but he clearly finds DD's lunacy appealing as he signed onto it.

Honestly, GG is hard for me to get a read on. When I see DD outside of the UT bts, I can see the continuity in his personality. I mean, yeah, everything's turned up to 11 in the UT bts because he's clearly infatuated with GG. But he's still a gremlin outside of the bts, just in a more subdued and less targeted way.

With GG, I struggle sometimes to see the continuity between his personality in the bts and his personality outside it (the wig doesn't help with this. it makes him look like a different person). Granted, I haven't delved into his solo work near as much as I have for DD (and, notably, he doesn't seem to do as much unscripted stuff as DD), but he strikes me as a person who is very adept at code-switching depending on the situation. DD is DD is DD, 24/7. GG is more adaptive to his surroundings.

I imagine that's one of the things that drew GG to DD (beyond the massive flirt-campaign...I mean, who could resist DD when he's going so freaking hard for it?).

Do I think GG's attracted to women? Honestly, not sure. I've not seen enough of his interactions with women or his history with women to say (I've spent way more time with DD outside of TU than GG). But I'm pretty sure he's attracted to men for these reasons:

a) His ideal life painting.

Put aside all the other interpretations people have for that. Just the fact that his ideal life included one (1) other person and that that person is a man is significant.

Admittedly, I don't know the background of the painting. It was used in an ad campaign, and if you watch the full video that showed the painting, the cat and bike elements are shown as inspired by stuff GG saw in a walk. I'm not sure how much creative control he had over the whole thing, and I've not been able to find anything in English about it.

But assuming that he had the freedom to paint his genuine ideal life, or at least enough of it to be the one to choose having a man in there (and why would the hotel specifically ask for a male companion in the painting?), then there's no het explanation for that. GG's ideal life is to be at the beach with his cat and another man.

b) When he wore Pride shoes to an interview.

Not just something that incidentally had a rainbow pattern. Straight-up Pride merch.

IME, allies don't wear Pride merch. Any ally I know who wears Pride merch will eventually come out as LGBT+ at some point. If you wear Pride merch, you're gay. (That's the rule)

Okay, more seriously. I grew up in the grimmer days of the 90s and 00s in US South, before rainbow-washing was profitable and before most studios felt comfortable showing even the slightest amount of gay relationships. Back when wearing a rainbow was a serious statement that would attract notice and might get you beat up (I had multiple friends who were physically attacked. I avoided it bc I am a trickster a bisexual and therefore invisible). Back then, the only people who wore Pride merch were actually gay. I can't think of any exceptions.

Later, as the situation for LGBT+ folks improved in the US (let's put aside the anxiety of the current anti-trans wave), I have seen a couple self-identified allies who wear Pride merch. But in every case, that ally eventually came out as gay. The "ally" label was a useful stopping place in their comfort with being openly gay.

Things may be different in China. I think in some ways, it probably resembles the way things were when I grew up--before gay marriage was legal and when the majority of people expressed disgust with gay people. On the other hand, the homophobia of the US has a strong religious element that doesn't seem to be present in China.

But all that regardless, wearing Pride merch is meaningful. Even now in the US, when rainbows are everywhere. It's definitely meaningful in China, where same-sex relationships are censored in the media.

c) I've discussed DD's overt flirting already, but another part of that "I'm not talking about WWX, I'm talking about XZ" video that struck me was GG's response.

He smiles, crinkles his nose, and shyly looks down. This is such a classic "I'm being flirted with and I'm into it" response (shy-person flavor). No straight guy would react to DD flirting with him like that. That reaction only makes sense if XZ is into being flirted with by men, DD in this case.

d) The BDSM conversation in the cave, complete with GG making an obscene, um, tongue gesture.

I'm trying my best to picture this as a conversation between 2 straight guys, and I'm failing here. The whole conversation is gay. Add in the literal tongue in cheek and it's incredibly flirty and suggestive. Like with C, GG's responses are just...not straight. They only make sense in a flirty context, and not one that's playing with them acting as Wangxian.

e) His involvement in TU.

This follows what I wrote for DD above. XZ was not as big a name as DD was at the time, so he was a relative unknown trying out for a role (for Xue Yang's role, specifically) on a show that may never air.

GG likely didn't have as many options open to him as DD at that time, so you could try to argue that he was just trying out for as many roles as he could.

But honestly, I think anybody who signed onto TU has higher than average odds of being LGBTQ+ themselves. Think about it. If you're queer and in the industry, you have few to no opportunities to play a role that reflects your relationships. You have few opportunities to work on a set that is overtly okay with same-sex relationships (at least, of the fictional variety).

You hear that a BL novel is being adapted and while you know BL novels are mainly for straight women, it's still gonna be a gay romance. Maybe your only chance at being involved in filming a gay romance. Of course you're going to want to be in on that.

Being in the closet sucks. Not being able to be yourself fully sucks. Back when I was a gay teen in the 90s-00s, I would just look up photos of girls kissing online (not porn. just kissing) just because I never saw that and it fed something inside of me that was missing. A part of me that was never reflected back at me. I ached for more lesbian relationships in TV and books, and I watched so many shitty movies/tv shows just because there were lesbians in it.

The media landscape is much better now here in the US, but when I think about how queer folk in the industry in China might feel, I think back to myself as a younger queer lady bursting at the seams to immerse myself in a world that actually had a space carved for me.

So yeah, being on the UT, in of itself, is a signal to me. It doesn't mean that everybody involved with it was gay. But I do think that it means that the odds of any particular person being gay is higher than in a non-BL production.

Admittedly, there's no way to prove this, and who knows? Maybe gay men would be less likely to want to work on a BL production because of the strained relationship between gay men and the boy-love genre. But I kinda doubt that because when your relationships are censored, you'll latch onto anything you can get that even resembles them. I watched countless anime made for horny fanboys because they had lesbians in them. I watched, literally, anything, no matter who created it. I know other gay girls who watched lesbian porn of the type made by and for straight men because they just wanted to see their own desires reflected at them, even if the reflection was a little wonky.

And that's just with watching media. Signing up to act in a project means you also get to connect with other people who are hypothetically okay with gay relationships. Who might even be gay, themselves. Fuck yeah, you're gonna leap on that.

So, yeah. This point is the last for both DD and GG but it's important because it establishes how I think about the production of TU. If the set had more gay cast/crew given the subject matter of the show, is it really so far-fetched that some people would hook up? Or start a relationship?

Once I convinced myself that GG and DD are some flavor of gay, the rest wasn't hard to buy into at all. But that's for the next post. :)

I am a clown and everything I say is fake. Don't buy into it.

Next Post: Consuming Candies Pt 2: DD ❤️ GG and GG ❤️ DD

[magicalrocketships]

Hello!! I'm really excited about reading more Max/Daniel dick chicken fic (how did the last ask put it?? escalating horny/feral gay chicken sexting maxiel fic? 🤲) Do you have a snippet you could share?? Thank you!!

I DO have another snippet I can share!!

This is from a fic known subtly as Daniel and Max play Dick Chicken. The snippet I've posted already is here, and there are another couple of bits and pieces in my dick chicken tag, but I swear I can never actually make those tag links work any more, so sorry if that comes up with literally nothing. Yay, Tumblr! I promise they do exist even Tumblr insists that's a broken link.

Anyway, have some Max/Daniel rimming. (E, 1700 words. Ever so slightly edited to remove a couple of bits of context-required spoilers but it should still make sense). The entire fic should be subtitled the one where they're feral for each other. This bit is the first time they've actually got naked together and not through a phone screen.

"You are late."

"I had to shower." Daniel feels like he should protest because they never specified a time, and anyway, only one of them has travelled half the fucking globe today, and he's done most of his sleeping recently in very uncomfortable airplane seats and it is not his fault that he's completely fucking insane over Max fucking Verstappen, who— who is just pushing down his shorts. He is just getting naked in his entrance hall and looking at Daniel like Daniel is the one making strange choices. Which he is, but at least he's still fucking clothed like a fucking normal person.

"You did not need to shower to come here, Daniel," Max says. "Take your clothes off."

Daniel toes off his flip-flops and leaves his phone and keys on the hall table. "I was gross, I needed to shower."

"No," Max says, holding his hands palm up and doing a little lifting motion with them, a take your t-shirt off, please request that Daniel obeys because it's either that or… not taking his t-shirt off. "It was fine. But now you are here, and you are not naked."

This is the most they've talked since Daniel left Red Bull. This is fine. There is probably nothing to say, anyway. They both know why they're here. He tugs his koala t-shirt over his head and lets it pool on the floor, tangling with Max's discarded clothes as Daniel shoves down his shorts. He's half-hard in Max's apartment, shorts hanging off one foot, and Max has his hand cupped around his dick like he could be posing for any one of those expressionless selfies he's sent Daniel over the past few weeks.

Daniel is playing the same little song on a loop in his head and it goes what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck—

Max tilts his chin up. "I am going to lick you out and make you come, Daniel."

Cool, Daniel thinks nonsensically, as any remaining brain power he still has takes a nosedive off the nearest balcony. His dick gives up too, and just gets as hard as it's ever got before. It even gives Max a jaunty little wave. Cool. Not embarrassing.

"If you still want it, of course."

"I want it," Daniel says, and something in his brain must still be processing information because he doesn't remember deciding to say yes. It just happened while he was still trying to take in the fact that Max Verstappen is naked in front of him, with his dick out, and the world still appears to be turning on its axis like everything is fine.

Fuck, Daniel remembers when he used to be straight.

"Good," Max says, and sets off for the bedroom like Daniel is just going to follow.

Daniel follows. Max doesn't take him to the bed, though, but to the dressing table over the other side of the bedroom. There's Max's stuff on it, discarded boarding passes and stuff from his pockets and detritus from travelling. Knocked over deodorant bottles, sponsor shit he's never even bothered opening. A watch getting dusty somewhere in among the still packaged Red Bull t-shirts. There's a mirror.

Max nods towards it. "You can watch yourself," he says, like that's a normal thing to say, and he drops to his fucking knees.

Daniel looks at him for the longest moment, at Max Verstappen hard and naked and on his knees for him, weirdly expressionless but clearly waiting for Daniel to get on with it.

So: Daniel leans over the dressing table, palms flat against the surface. He spreads his legs and looks back over his shoulder at Max kneeling behind him.

Max looks up at him then. His eyes are bright. "I am going to make you come, Daniel."

"Yeah," Daniel says. His voice is hoarse. "Please."

Max adjusts his position. On his knees, directly behind him, his dick just there. Hard. Glistening wet at the tip. Daniel's mouth is dry. He licks his lips. Then Max cups Daniel's ass in his hands. Palms to his skin. "I have thought about this a lot, Daniel," he says, spreading Daniel's ass cheeks like this is a normal way to touch someone intimately for pretty much the first time. Daniel's skin already feels like touch paper. One spark and he'll be decimated. "I have come already thinking about this."

Daniel stares at himself in the mirror. He is pink. Unshaven. Eyes wide. His throat works. "Yeah?"

"Yes, very much," Max says, and then he strokes over Daniel's hole with the pad of his thumb. Daniel's hips skitter forwards, thighs hitting the dressing table. His dick bumps up against the torn plastic packaging of a new Red Bull shirt. Daniel shoves the plastic away until it's just the t-shirt. He drags his tip across the shirt. It leaves a little snail trail already. Max's thumb strokes his hole. It is disconcerting, because Max has never demonstrated a second of warming up in any of his pictures or videos. His is a hot lap approach to orgasms, fast and furious, and right now it is just his thumb. Daniel is watching himself in the mirror and it is already too much and literally nothing has happened yet. He is watching his own destruction and it is too late to stop it. He is already destroyed.

But then— Max spits on him. He spits and it runs down Daniel's ass crack and over his hole and Max gathers it up and strokes him wet. He spits again.

Daniel blurts pre come onto Max's shirt. He swallows down a groan. He is watching Rome burn but he is Rome and he's the one who lit the fucking match.

"You can make noises, Daniel," Max says. He has switched to the pads of his fingers, more than one. Daniel can feel his hole fucking flutter and it is humiliating, but it is more humiliating when he presses back against Max's fingers. But then Max leans in and Daniel feels the warmth of Max's breath on his skin and then Max presses his tongue to Daniel's hole and Daniel fucking expires.

Max is all business. He is data driven, at speed, the track a learning experience beneath his tongue. He drags his tongue up Daniel's crack, sweeps of attention that have Daniel whimpering. He laps at Daniel's hole, kitten licks, only moving away to spit on him, dirty and so, so fucking hot. He cups Daniel's balls through his legs, not gentle, never gentle, like touch is function and the only outcome is Daniel's eventual orgasm.

Daniel drowns. He drowns in the mirror, helpless to stay quiet, skin flushing pink. He presses his ass back into Max's face, and Max digs his fingers into Daniel's thigh and licks at him like it's a fucking race. Daniel melts like ice cream. When Max's thumb presses inside of him, his tongue lapping around it, Daniel cries out. He holds himself up on the flats of his palms, leaning forward until his forehead is pressed against the mirror. His breath clouds, wet and warm, steaming up the mirror.

Max's thumb is replaced by his tongue. He is inside of him. He eats Daniel out like he's starving. It is filthy hot. Spit drips down his crack. His dick leaks pre come across Max's shirt, and for a moment, Daniel longs for him to wear it afterwards. Daniel marking him up like he's his. He gasps it out into the mirror.

Max sits back, his breathing ragged. His tongue is replaced by a finger, two fingers, then he's back and there is spit and his tongue and he covers Daniel's hole with his mouth and alternately sucks and blows like it's a fucking practice session and he's trying to find the best fucking line to take a corner.

Daniel shudders through it. He shivers. He is disintegrating, Max re-arranging his molecules with his tongue, but the mirror shows him whole. A fucking mess, but whole. He reaches down to grab his dick, but he's barely got his fist wrapped around it when Max is nudging his hand away.

"I am going to make you come, Daniel," Max tells him, circling Daniel's wrist with his free hand. "Not you."

Daniel drops his chin to his chest. "You're going to," he manages. "God, Max, you're going to."

"Good," Max says, sounding satisfied, sounding breathless, and then he's spitting on Daniel's hole again and it's so fucking gross and so fucking perfect that Daniel just forgets everything but the points of connection; fingertips circling his wrist, a thumb to his pulse point, Max's nose and his lips and his fucking tongue. His other hand splayed across the top of his thigh, his thumb to Daniel's ass. The dressing table is leaving lines across the tops of his thighs. Daniel hopes they bruise, hopes he can go back home and press his hands to the marks and know that they are there because he went looking for knives and he found Max.

He found Max. God, he's going to come. He's going to fucking come, and it's going to be with his dick untouched because Max is still holding his wrist. Max's mouth circles his hole again, lips pressed to his skin. Max blows. Max's tongue tickles him, laps at his rim, slips inside again.

Daniel shudders, shivers, trembles. He tips over into orgasm almost without permission, pulsing come over Max's new Red Bull shirt, his dusty watch, a discarded bottle of Right Guard. A single condom, still in its wrapper. He presses his forehead to the mirror and watches come seep into Max's shirt.

Max licks him through it, until Daniel's pretty much pushing him away, over-sensitive and out of it. He drops to his elbows on the dressing table, hands to his face. He breathes. Behind him, Max gets to his feet. His hand goes to Daniel's hip. To the small of his back. Down over his ass, spreading his cheeks again. He's jerking off. Daniel knows without looking, he knows those sounds.

He shifts so he can watch in the mirror. He meets Max's gaze. He's flushed, his face a mess, his hair everywhere. Pre come drips onto Daniel's ass. His hand blurs.

"Come on me," Daniel tells him. "Please, Max. Please."

[epersonae]

Because you foolishly agreed to more than one of these: Director's Cut of "BIGFOOT STOLE MY HUSBAND!", please.

anyway.

before I even start on this, let me just say that I love that you've picked out my three OFMD fics that imho get the best comments in very different ways. for the benefit of all the broken hearts gets the in-depth analysis and plot-based screaming; I spit on your grave is full of I NEEDED THIS CATHARSIS; and BIGFOOT STOLE MY HUSBAND is about 80% "would it be weird if I wanted to kiss bigfoot/o no you've awakened something in me", which me too bud (actually this comment is one of my favorite comments on anything ever).

Sometimes you write something you're not into entirely out of spite, well, 80% spite and 20% as a gift to your friends lol.

Which is to say that someone posted a link to a pretty bad (and also at the time the only) Ed/Stede/Bigfoot fic in a server I'm in (come ON, "it was all a dream"?!?!?! COWARD) and we got chatting about what a good fic would be like, and then dammit now I have an actual idea.

I said in my previous director's commentary post that I often need a hook to get into a story, and the camping narration that it starts with was the hook.

My ex-husband (first spouse, the bad marriage, the divorce) was very outdoorsy in that Pacific Northwest way; in college he'd worked for a summer as a guide on Mt Rainier and then the following winter was the caretaker for a lodge. He was not as gung-ho about it as some of his friends, but he did always want for us to go on a "real" backpacking trip, and we did a lot of car camping. And like, we had some real awful arguments and terrible experiences, but also there was a lot I enjoyed about it, and I hadn't (still haven't) done that since before I got divorce. (iirc we didn't go out at all that last summer we were together, which feels like part of the "everything coming to a head" of that year.)

So apparently I had a whole bunch of pent-up feelings about camping, both the actual physical experience of being in the woods/mountains and the experience of doing something that your partner is into WAY more than you are. (Which, yes, is both about the camping and Bigfoot.)

One of the other things about that fic is the whole scent experience, obviously, and that is the 20% gift for a friend aspect of that story, because one of the people who I was more or less writing it for is someone who I thought would appreciate that particular aspect. My beta also pushed me to be more specific and detailed about the actual fragrance notes, so I did two things. One, I looked up perfume sites and stuff for the kind of language people use for that, and two, what ended up being the most notorious (?) details: I opened up my spice drawer and literally smelled all of my spices to find something that might be a little unusual but also felt right. And that is where the cumin thing comes from.

(I think the commenter experience of "would it be weird if I were into this" comes both from my commitment to sensory detail and to Ed's inner narration of "would it be weird if I were into this")

Finally, I knew it needed to end not with Bigfoot, but with them affirming their connection to each other, and I did seriously laugh out loud when I realized I could use "he's got nice hair". It's so stupid and so perfect.

(also the detail of the two of them having a selfie with a roadside attraction fake taxidermy Bigfoot is stolen from my experience going to the Portland Maine cryptozoology museum and doing exactly that with Ryn, who loved all things Bigfoot.) (I've had relationships with at least four people who are/were really into cryptids, I have no idea what that's about.)

[ask me for the director's commentary on a fic!]

[peri-peri-sauce]

"They do raffles, giveaways and post exclusive content only for people who can afford to pay. And what about the rest of us? Are those of us who don't want to pay just going to keep getting vacation photos and the occasional selfie?"

I want to bring another point of view: I haven't paid for any content so far, and I haven't been to gigs (because I live in a country where he hasn't toured yet). But, I have been perfectly happy with his funny and eccentric little clips in ig and tiktok, and I listen to his music every day. I really really LOVED Ruoska, Kot Kot and Trafik, which we got this year. For two of those, we even got music videos, and great promos. Those are not "just" vacation photos or occasional selfies. He then had a summer tour, then a well deserved holiday (with THE BOJAN! which was not "just " vacation photos either, at least for me), and now we've received glimpses of a new song and an album coming soon. To me, that's A LOT, without paying anything. Mind you, I didn't subscribe to OF, because it's not my cup of tea, and that's fine.

Creating content is not free - it takes time and effort. We also know, that last year's euro tour was not very financially advantageous for him. It's expensive to tour, it takes a big crew, whose salaries need to be paid, all the logistics etc taken care of. I truly 100% understand that they try to monetise some of it. And I think a 14 euro one-off payment for exclusive tour content is NOT a lot - given that it will be good quality (that is left to be seen). It's actually much cheaper than a concert ticket or most of the merch. So, I decided to pay, although of course the platform they chose is not ideal. But, I wanted to show them support, because so far I got everything for free. And, it seems like he is still active in ig as well so not everything will be behind a paywall.

Last year he said he was burnt out and did way too much - it was a crazy year! He's doing a lot of gigs this year as well. Plus, on top of all that, he's moved (?) or is moving to a new home, and who knows what else is going on in his personal life that we have no clue about. I love him, the way he is. For me, personally, he doesn't even need to do or offer something "new" ALL the time. Give the guy a break. He's only a human. He's not perfect, but I love him.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. Maybe it's just me, but I feel like he's been on vacation a lot this year. First the trip to Thailand, then he went skiing and played hockey, then he went to Spain right after Böle, then Spain again after the Fuengirola gig, and finally Cyprus. He deserved the holidays, especially after last year, but I have to admit I got a bit bored. And to be honest, I couldn't care less that Bojan was there too.

I understand it takes a lot of work to create all the songs for the album, and maybe I was just being impatient about it. I also get that, of course, he wants to make money and monetize everything, but at some point it feels like you're missing out on important things if you don't pay (and I don't want to get into this again, but some people don't like the fact that the website uses NFTs, which prevents them from buying it and, as a result, they miss out on the content).

That said, I've been reading other people's opinions and I’m starting to see things from a different perspective, but I still stand by some of the things I said.

You're right, he's not perfect, and I still love him too, but that won't stop me from sharing my opinion about the things I don't like or disagree with.

And this is the last ask I'm going to answer about this topic.

[steamworkscogstone]

[Edit: Sep 29th 2024]

HEART THIS BEFORE YOU FOLLOW ME, PLEASE! It helps me to know who has and has not read this so I may direct their attention to it.

DNI: 18+ ONLY BLOG, No terfs and swerfs, no transmed truscum, no ageless blogs, Nothing Illegal, NO MINORS, Nobody who openly and actively hates, especially on the transgender community (which includes my non-binary siblings) DO NOT SELL ME SHIT, AND DO NOT SEND ME STUFF TO SIGNAL BOOST! I CANNOT HANDLE THAT STUFF MENTALLY, ANYMORE..

PLEASE READ MY PINS ON THIS POST, YA ADORABLE DEGENERATES. 😁

HEART THIS BEFORE FOLLOWING SO I KNOW WHO'S SAFE!! 😊 😊 😊

Ayyo, check these links before following and interacting, too!!:

So first up, I've put my goofy ass on the hellsite, and did a fun little selfie dump! (Maybe some tummy Tuesdays in the near future?)

Secound is an important thread of consciousness, please read with discretion and understand that I do not tag triggers (because I struggle with tagging as is. Anyway, so this is the bit ya wanna read before interacting with me)

Alright, so I have yet another link that is dealing with an answer to an anon, but it is extremely important as it gives better context to the post/s linked above: more Steamworks lore, yay..

(I apologize about the long winded text, but that's just how I do things. I'm a writer, at least in a texting format. 😅)

Warnings: I am a pro-shipper and anti-censorship, I love using the word queer and I identify as such, while also enjoying identifying the people I text with as such. I enjoy what I enjoy and I have heavy kinks. If any of these warnings are in your DNI or makes you uncomfortable, then please block me and do not report me.

I AM A HARRY POTTER MOVIE ENJOYER! I UNDERSTAND JK ROWLING IS A DEVILOUS PIECE OF SHIT AND EVEN THAT IS TOO KIND OF AN INSULT FOR HER! I WATCH THE MOVIES THRU 3RD PARTY MEANS, AND I REFUSE TO PAY FOR ANYTHING HARRY POTTER THAT IS NEW WHILE SHE IS ALIVE, AND WILL FIND ALTERNATIVE WAYS TO PLAY THE NEW GAMES BECAUSE THEY GENUINELY LOOK FUN. Please, please ask yourself why you decide to attack those, ESPECIALLY IN YOUR OWN COMMUNITY, over something they grew up with and actively love as an adult? We are all just trying to get through this life, and all have our own things that help us escape; we are already so divided and splintered, and so you actively hating your trans brothers and sisters, and nonbinary siblings (who barely make up 1 million on the United States' population already) is simply hurting too many people.

Peace, love, acceptance, and alternative means of coming to a peaceful resolution is what I desire in this world. A world that is already so painfully divided, whether that be by a screen or you actively choosing to hate, is just such a burden on those who will be trying so hard to make a name for themselves. Yes, I just pulled a "think of the children" because, seriously stating that seems so obvious and yet, too many people are dismissive of it when they are literally the future.

Do NOT come after me for my existence, and if you see I am following you and decide against the things I enjoy and my personal beliefs and message, then just block me. PLEASE DON'T REPORT ME.. 😖

Eh, fuck it: I'm making my hearted posts public again, and if you don't like it then leave and I know we're not chill with each other. Love ya still, even for those who do leave, or are too afraid to follow because of them having mutuals they really click with, but would absolutely shun them for enjoying what I absolutely adore! I SEE YOU!

[RAMBLING INCOMING]

Okay, so this is going to be my pinned post, and it's going to be a heavy work in Progress. I've gotten some feedback from a couple people, and well, I'm not okay with how stiff and forced my original pin came out. I know I can write something better and will when I have the time.

Name: Prefer Coggy or Golem while first interacting; more personal names given the closer we become.

Age: Currently 23 at the time of this edit. (2024)

Gender: Femboy/Tomgirl transfem mess of an existing baby femby. The body has been thru a physical transition, although difficult and uneasy, since 2018. We actually just recently marked the 6th year of being on whoremones. Most of us do lean more towards femininity than masculinity however, the hosts gender is ever evolving as the months go on. We have been on this wild and zany rollercoaster of The Gender Journey™ since 2016 when the host started socially transitioning at 15, and even today there is still heavy developments.

We obviously have a list of limits on our kinks and fetishes, however we do not feel comfortable sharing things just yet, as there are a lot of people we enjoy following, but seem to wish to shun those with certain fetishes by blocking them.

DESIRES ARE INHERENTLY NEUTRAL, AS MOST OF THEM ARE THING WE ARE BORN WITH THAT CANNOT BE TRANSFORMED OR REMOVED FROM ONES IDENTITY (such as gender and sexual identity). AS WE FORM LATER ON, KINKS AND FETISHES BECOME NEW DESIRES, AND THUS SUCH THINGS ARE INHERENTLY NEUTRAL AS WELL.

Need to update the tags. (It's a safe call to go off of what I've tagged one of my more recent personal posts or reblogs with text.)

Yeah, more to add later!

(List of things to add: Mutuals list, tags, stuff)

[fandomfluffandfuck]

Personally, as a dom, I've never experienced what I would consider a full-blown drop. I've had some close calls, but my (unfortunately) extensive experience with depression and other mental health problems has enabled me to be on top of knowing the symptoms of drop. I recognize them, and I can usually take care of myself if I don't still have access to the partner that I had a scene with.

So, if you're looking for something where I incorporate lots and lots of own experience into a fictional scenario in the same way that I did with this post concerning what it feels like to get hard (which, if I'm assuming correctly, was something you would've been interested in based on your wording here, lol) that isn't what this is.

BUT

I certainly have ideas for Chris experiencing it, and I couldn't get them out of my head. Even if I'm not currently taking writing prompts

Chris doesn't even notice there's anything going on with him until Sebastian calls him. Okay, well, truthfully, he doesn't let himself notice that's there's anything going on until Seb goes full decective on him. Then, his boyfriend pulls the emotions up in a big tangled ball from deep in his chest, somewhere behind his lungs and heart, through his mouth. Bringing them to his attention, better than letting them fester, but still painful.

"Chris?" Sebastian speaks first, voice just a touch tinny over the phone.

"Hey, babe," Chris mumbles. He's tired. It's the middle of the day in Massachusetts. He's on vacation. He didn't stay up last night. He has no idea why he's tired or why his back hurts.

"Hi!" Seb shakes him from his thoughts.

"...did you call for somethin'?" Chris replies, licking his lips, when Sebastian says nothing else, "it's, what, 12 there? Shouldn't you be in bed? What time is call in the mornin'?"

"Don't worry about it," Sebastian tells him, his voice smooth and easy, "I called 'cause I miss you."

Chris wants to huff and roll his eyes, but it won't come out. Instead, he weakly offers, "it's been three days?" Has it been three? Already?

"What, I'm not allowed to miss you yet?" Sebastian teases lightly.

Chris shrugs, forgetting that Sebastian can't see him. Dodger plops his head into his lap with a doggy sigh. It feels like he misses Sebastian, too.

"Besides," Sebastian's voice is softer now, "you've barely texted."

A big, fat question mark hangs over his head suddenly, "huh?"

"You haven't texted me. I mean, you have. You text back, but I've been texting you first."

"Oh?" Chris hasn't really... is he doing that? He hasn't meant to!

"Mmm-hmm, I'm missing all my Dodger-and-boyfriend selfies. Usually, I get at least one every day. Or if it's not both of my boys, it's just Dodger, or a tree or flower or the sky or your breakfast or something."

"Oh," Chris feels bad. There's a knot in his chest, and it's tightening. Has he been ignoring him? He's been... what has he been doing? He's been scrolling. He kept sitting down to read and not being able to focus. So, he gets his phone out instead and... disappears into it until Dodger noses him for walks or dinner or it's time to sleep, and he lays down and thinks about Sebastian and gets stuck in anxiety spirals. Not because of Seb but. Adjacent?

"Then when you do text back, I dunno," Chris can practically hear him scratching his head, "you respond to what I'm saying, but it's not... not the same," Sebastian finishes lamely.

"I'm sorry, baby," Chris says with his whole chest. He is. There's guilt knawing at him now. He's been absent. He doesn't--didn't mean to.

"It's okay, I just want to know what's up. Are you okay?"

Chris swallows.

Is he okay?

He thought, he doesn't know, but he thought he was having a good old anxiety spiral, missing Sebastian after his recent departure, and that ache for his boyfriend had just dug up some older wounds about not being enough. And thinking about not being enough came with friends. Unwanted friends. Friends that add to not being enough by telling him, actually, he's kind of disgusting. How can he control Sebastian like he does? If he loves him, how can he do such things to him? He's too extreme, isn't he? He's too controlling, isn't he? Is he even a good man at all? Why is he like that? Why does he want the things he wants? He shouldn't want them. Does Sebastian like it? Does Sebastian even like being dominated? Is he just taking advantage?

"Chris, honey?" Sebastian's voice sounds like honey. Sweet and smooth.

"Yeah?" Chris rasps, voice hoarse despite how Seb has been doing the bulk of the talking.

"Are you okay?"

"I--" Chris has a false start. He doesn't know what to say, or how to end that thought.

Now he's thinking about the last time he saw Sebastian. Before he left for the airport. They couldn't help themselves, transitioning from innocent to R-rated goodbyes. However, Chris did put his foot down, gently, over one thing; they couldn't have too intense of a scene when they were already running the risk of making Seb miss his flight. Chris would feel awful if they didn't have enough time for at least a little aftercare. If he floated too high, scene-ing too hard, Chris didn't want him dropping on the plane ride. The moment they had was satisfying regardless, with Sebastian on his knees and--

Chris misses that.

He misses Sebastian.

He misses the clarity of being with Sebastian. Touching him. Feeling him. Breathing him in.

So. He's thinking of what happened right before he left. He's thinking about what it's like to share a scene with Sebastian, not a scene on a film set, (although any of those scenes are magic), too. Because it's Sebastian. He's a fucking world class actor and a world class submissive. Of course, acting opposite of him is incredible. Of course, dominating him is incredible. Clarity and peace and focus. His submissive. Collaring. Protecting. Caring. Providing. Strength for his submissive but weakness, too.

An insatiable urge for him.

Only him.

Sebastian.

He would do anything for his submissive.

His partner.

"I don't know," Chris finally murmurs his answer.

Sebastian hums, "alright."

"Alright?" Is... is he supposed to add something here? He doesn't know what to say.

"Yeah, that's okay. It's alright. However you are, whatever it is, I want to know about it. Even if you don't know, y'know?"

A lightning strike of feeling strikes through Chris' chest. Raw and breaking. He tries to swallow around the weight piling up at the back of his throat, but all he ends up doing is choking for a moment.

Palms clammy, eventually, Chris manages, "h-how's the set?" he's clinging to his boyfriend's voice.

Sebastian rattles off one detail in answer, then another and another and another when Chris just keeps asking questions. Questions that pour over his lips and don't always make a ton of sense. That doesn't even matter. Why is he asking that? Chris can feel his battery, his energy, depleting--draining down to nothing, and yet his mouth is running a mile a minute. His thoughts are dragging on, slogging awkward and slow through mud, but his questions only keep coming. Paradoxical.

How are you? Are you okay? You're not too cold, right? It's winter there, isn't it? Are you having a good time with the cast? Do you like them? They better like you, do they even realize how fucking great you are? Are you eating? Are you sleeping? Do you miss me? Do you miss fu--

Chris is in the middle of his spiral, wanting, desperately to know everything that's going on in Sebastian's head when, suddenly, Sebastian says his name. He doesn't yell. Just the opposite, he whispers it.

Chris hears it.

Chris hears, more than feels, his mouth snap shut.

"Chris, baby, if you want to fly out and come see me, you can just say it."

"No, I don't. I," his voice comes out small, nothing like the rambling, louder, and louder mess he was just making, "I, I..." There's a heavy rock in his throat that he has to swallow dry and scraping, then, "y-yeah. Can I? You're not too busy?"

"'M never too busy," he reassures him.

Chris makes an aching sort of sound. Wounded. He can't help it. He knows that, and he's stupid for thinking otherwise, but he just... hearing it is good. He wants to curl up in those words, he wants to curl himself into a ball and bundle up in Sebastian's side and have him stroke his back. He's so tired. He misses him so much.

It's only been a few days.

At the same time that he misses him so fucking bad and he wants to be embraced and held, he missing him so fucking bad and he wants to take care of him like he should. But also like he shouldn't. Sebastian is grown. He can care for himself, and he doesn't need Chris to impose, bleeding his controlling longing all over him. Chris has always needed to be needed.

"That sound good, baby?" Sebastian asks once they have the details in place, when and where.

Chris nods. He forgets, again, that his boyfriend can't see him. Running in ceaseless circles. But Sebastian, magic, understands nevertheless.

Then, Seb signs off, letting him go with reassuring reminders to sleep and eat and take care of himself. He'll text him later, once they've both gotten some sleep.

In a few days time, the only way Chris can drag himself out of bed--one limb at a time, peeling the sheets back, and struggling his way into sweats, dropping Dodger off at his Ma's house--and make it to the airport is by knowing that all that stands between him and Sebastian is a few hours. He just has to make it through the plane ride.

A plane ride that he mostly sleeps through, despite having just crashed all night.

When Chris finally, finally fucking lands, he's moping through baggage claim and the, just, whole fucking airport with his baseball cap tugged low and his sunglasses, the largest, darkest pair he owns, hoping no one recognizes him and deeply wishing that he insisted on having Sebastian meet him at the airport. The passing thought entered his head but he was thinking less about himself and more about public appearances then. He's thinking more of himself now. And he wants Seb. So badly. He misses the way he smells and how he laughs and his eyes and--

He could've gotten a later flight that would've worked. Right? So Sebastian would be done filming for the day and he could've been here. Now?

Chris is vibrating out of his skin, fingers curled into fists around his backpack's straps and suitcase's handle. He can't wait to be alone with his boyfriend. He's closer to him now yet he just misses him more.

However, maybe it's a good thing that Seb isn't there. Because. The moment he is there... the paparazzi would have a field day.

The moment Seb lets himself into the rented apartment he's staying at for filming, the door isn't even closed! Yet, Chris is already collapsing into him.

His hands immediately land on his hips but they quickly wrap around his waist--wrapping him tightly, securely up in his arms while he buries his face in his neck. He's warm and he smells like coffee and sweat and Sebastian. Chris knows because he's pressing his nose as hard into the junction between his neck and shoulder and breathing him in as he can. He needs him. He's probably stretching Seb's shirt with how hard he's grabbing him, but he can't find it in himself to care--he'll pay costuming whatever they ask himself. His eyeslashes sweep shut. He already feels better. More centered. Steady. Like he's standing on two feet again, finding purchase on a softly carpeted floor of a familiar, warm home.

"Seb," Chris whispers into his skin like it's a prayer. He doesn't realize he's crying until he feels the wetness from his own eyes on Sebastian's body. He clings harder.

Sebastian squeezes him back, whispering too, "hi, baby."

They stand, hugging--cuddling, really, in the entryway for enough time that Chris' silent tears turn into sniffles and dry eyes. The feeling of Sebastian's heat against him echoes through his bones. He relishes in it. He doesn't stop clinging, though. He can't. All he can do is hold him and breath. Hold him and breathe as Seb heards him over toward the living room, bringing him with him and settling their bodies together on the couch, legs and fingers tangled, Chris on top of him, blanketing him.

Their hearts were racing, exilerated by the chance to be close enough to touch once more--in the same timezone--but now they slow. Steady and deep, chest to chest. Pumping blood and love through their veins, dissolving into their muscles. Lying lump and heavy, slumped into each other.

Chris tries hard to breathe out every drop of tension in his body under the soothing swirls of Sebastian's palms over his shoulders and back. It isn't hard to relax like this, when he's here, but the last dregs of emotion are especially deep seated, heavy, and hard to drain away. He shivers.

"Cold?" Sebastian asks.

Chris shakes his head. No.

Never.

Seb knows exactly what he wants. Seb knows what he needs. Seb knows what he feels somehow, even though Chris feels like a walking, unidentified swirl of anxiety. Seb knows what he wants to hear. Chris doesn't have to say a damn thing, Seb is just in his head, answering every silent question--rattling on in a soothing tone, I missed you so much. I miss everything that we do. I miss kissing you. I miss touching you. I miss sleeping next to you. I miss the things you do to me. I miss the things you make me feel. I love you.

They fall asleep.

Then, when they're awake again, late into the evening, and they've peeled themselves apart just enough to stand hip to hip, waiting for water to boil, mugs poised to happily hold their tea and honey, steaming away--Sebastian is back in his head, wandering around his skull, sight-seeing.

"Hey," Seb finds something that takes his fancy--that ugly insecurity that he's not what Sebastian wants or that he takes too much, he controls too much. He sees and he tugs him close.

Chris smiles.

"Remember when we first got together--"

"Yeah?" He already feels lighter.

"We were just barely hooking up and I told you, you could go harder on me. Then, when you didn't get what I meant," his grin is sly, his sparkling eyes shifty, "I explained it to you, and you..." he chuckles conspiratorially, "didn't spank me that hard at all."

"Hey!" Chris laughs softly.

"And I had to talk you up to doing anything more than hitting me on the ass sometimes." Sebastian kisses him on the cheek, "now look at you! Now you regularly blow my mind with how kinky we get."

Chris opens his mouth to say something, he's already chuckling, but Seb is there--

"You give me more than I knew how to ask for. I like it. I love it. And I have more than a lifetime's worth of evidence that you do, too."

Chris sighs, swaying into him, "I love you."

"Love you, too."

"Thanks for getting me outta my head, Seb."

"Anytime."

[bamboobrat]

succession s4 e1 recap: bridget random-fuck and the logan roy selfie fiasco

happy return of succession, everyone! and with that, my completely unhinged and ridiculously time consuming recaps. i was honestly not sure i wanted to go down this rabbit hole for another season, but given that it is our last, i think i'll have to.

my coping mechanism currently is complete and utter denial. let's see how long that lasts.

we start off the episode at the most depressing birthday party there ever was. did you think the season one birthday party was bad? at least there was baseball and logan nearly dying. in season four it's all greg calling himself an honorary kid and fingering a girl called bridget in the guest room.

something tells me logan is regretting teaming up with tom and greg right about now.

in california, the siblings are pitching investors on a new media venture. as per usual, there's a lot of bullshitting involved and i can't tell if kendall is high or not during all of it, but it's nice to see the sibs be a team - at least for now.

back in new york, kerry is not happy with greg bringing bridget random-fuck to logan's party. couldn't agree more.

as for shiv, she is totally fine with the idea of tom getting a drink with naomi pierce.

this is definitely the face of someone who is fine:

if this was any other show, i'd launch the theory that shiv is pregnant right here. but this is succession, so that seems unlikely.

also, maybe i'm just projecting, knowing that snooks is pregnant.

either way, we've got a fantastic shiv episode on our hands. can't wait for sarah to win all the awards.

connor is polling at one percent, but is getting squeezed. as willa says, it's all super greedy, since his opponents already have all the other percents.

frankly rude to do my guy con and the conheads dirty this way. what would an election be without an unhinged billionaire, i mean, i can't remember. it's the american way.

anyway, this is the look of someone who has just been reassured he will still be part of the business, even if he gets a divorce:

super reassured.

bridget random-fuck keeps causing problems. first, she posts about a pierce family member being at the birthday party on social media, then she asks logan for a selfie saying, and i kid you not, kar-ching.

all the unhinged gerri kellman lesbians immediately notice her in the background, judging.

bridget is like an unhinged version of greg in the first episode of season one. good for her.

meanwhile the birthday boy is having a great time without his kids. nothing screams birthday like contemplating your own mortality.

i've also seen some posts that are like "wow so much has happened in ONE year", indicating that this is logan's 81st birthday, but i'm not sure. they don't mention his age specifically, so i think we can just live with the ambiguity of whatever timeline we are comfortable with.

i personally think it's been a few years at least. if not, shiv and tom's marriage would have lasted what, six, seven months? rude.

after shiv's phone call with tom, the kids start realizing that logan is planning to buy PGM (again), and they immediately back out of the business venture they have been planning for the last few months.

and the award for most delusional goes to kendall for this comment:

roman is the only one that's not into buying up a dying media conglomerate because he is a girlboss. he's really the only one who wants to build up a new company from scratch and i'm so proud of him.

what a journey we roman fans have been on. truly.

logan takes his best pal, colin, on a date, and we realize, once again, that logan respects the people who work for him more than he ever will his children, because his children have been given everything all their lives.

logan does a whole "is there anything after death" shakespearean monologue and the odds that he will die by the end of this season are forever in our favor. this pleases me:)

connor wants to use his wedding as a political stunt, which makes me think the timeline of this season will be super short. will all the episodes take place during the ten days leading up to the election?

seems strange, given that they travel to norway, but it's an interesting thought.

greg has sex in the guest room and logan has CCTV. or at least tom wants greg to believe he does. anyway, i don't really want to get into it. poor bridget.

gerri, it seems, is still out in the cold after the dickpick ordeal. truly destabilizing to see our queen on shaky ground, but also good for her that she gives less of a fuck, leaving karl to look like this:

perfection. he is and will always be a true foodie.

anyway, logan doesn't take the news that his kids also want to buy pierce well.

on the west coast (in napa?), nan is truly weaponizing her liberal image and the whole "i'm just an old lady who doesn't understand capitalism"-vibe.

it's a sight to be seen.

roman, of course, sees right through her.

but it doesn't really matter, because the roy kids are too occupied with waging war on their father to notice they are getting played.

and to think i'm lowkey rooting for this idiots...

greg doesn't want to see what happens in guantanamo and leaves dealing with random-fuck to colin, the one true hero of this show.

gerri is straight up not having a good time.

we need to save her.

the kids offer up 10 bill for PGM. it feels extremely rushed and stupid and driven by revenge, but i'm glad to know roman knows how many zeros there are in a billion.

someone get him to new york asap so he can show gerri.

the kids win the bid and logan is not happy:

this is the look of a girl who needed a win. bless her heart.

because eventually, shiv goes back to new york and has to face tom, the traitor, disguisting boy from st. paul who wants her to talk....

... and if you know anything about being emotionally repressed, you'd know that is absolutely not an option.

so they lie there for a bit and hold hands and all of a sudden i realize that this stupid show has done it again. they made me care about a bunch of terrible, rich people. AGAIN.

i hate you, jesse armstrong, i really do.

during the last scene, we get one of the best lines of the episode:

logan is at home, alone, watching ATN and calling cyd to complain. i honestly can't tolerate cyd slander. that being said, i do hope we get a war of the networks between ATN and PGM moving forward.

if you stayed with me for this entire recap, congrats. you're just as demented as i am.

for next weeks episode, i need more gerri. i bet you are all surprised to hear that.

[inhibitionfreewriting]

this is not as long but i wanted to post it because where i got to i was proud of it. part three when the brain worm continues ♥

jerma x reader x ludwig (part two; electric boogaloo)

it was complicated at first, trying to figure out if you should put... hard rules in place, hard boundaries? what were the three of you, did you want to put a name to it? or would you rather just... exist together?

the first time you woke up after the three of you spent the night together, you felt at peace. you were between both boys, lud's arm around you, jerma's back against your side, facing away from you both but your ankles were crossed. you couldn't tell what time it was, but you nestled a little further into lud's arms, twisting your back towards him and wrapping an arm around jerma and tugging him (to the best of your ability) close to you. it was like a sleepover with your best friends.

every night together was like this, someone being pulled close, other limbs tangled, lazy kisses pressed into skin, long heavy contented sighs. oh and the days - the days were just as nice as the nights, watching movies and shows and sharing moments, trying to bridge gaps of connection, cooking food, ordering out when you were all lazy.

"wish you guys didn't have to go back," lud mumbled, standing in the doorway and watching you both pack.

"i don't really want to go back but i've already taken a lot of time off." you had to get back to your boring day time job and your boring, lonely house, doomed to momentary highs of selfies and night time phone calls.

and this conversation happens every time with the three of you. stay after stay. 8 months in, jerma finally breaks and says on a call, "why don't you just move in with one of us?"

"w-what?"

"he's right," ludwig says, "you can spend more time with us if you live with at least one of us. easier for the other to travel, not like our jobs have cut and dry schedules." you pursed your lips, they're both right. you had a remote data entry job that was fine, but definitely gave you more structure in your day to day. you frowned and pulled your feet up on your seat, arms around your legs.

"i mean i can, i just don't want you guys to feel like im taking advantage of -"

"your two very well endowed boyfriends?" ludwig paused to laugh, unable to hold it in before continuing, "sorry what i meant to say was, well paid." you covered your face and shook your head.

"don't one of you have to stream or something? can i not think about life changing decisions at 9pm on a thursday?"

"look all I'm saying - all we're saying, is that it would be more convenient if the three of us lived together, but that's not possible to do right now so one of us is better than nothing." you groaned, leaning your weight on your desk out of the view of your webcam, staring at the two rings on your right hand.

"i'll think about it."

[goron-king-darunia]

DotNW Draw-a-thon Recap

Links to individual posts and the associated art at the end. But first, some thoughts.

Want to start by saying this was an excellent and very fun event and even though the English fandom is very small, it was fun to participate. I will be adding on more monsters into the sketchbook to fill it up, but probably not at the rate I've been drawing this month. I would like to someday make the complete monsterbook, including the descriptions from the game, organized in groups based on evolution, but that's a big and very casual project for the future. No promises. It's just a shame that such a resource doesn't already exist. There are videos on youtube that let you look at the monsters in a players completed monster book, but none of them go for the little descriptions and all of the videos are ancient potato-quality rips or just straight up filmed from a monitor rather than screen-capped. It's just not the same as big fancy drawings. But also I will never not be salty that you cannot rotate the monsters in the monster book. I wanna see what these guys look like! SOMEBODY PUT EFFORT INTO DESIGNING THEM, LET ME SEE THEM! AUGH!

Skills I learned from this draw a thon:

People are hard to draw. But the Loomis method for heads simplifies a lot of facial anatomy with easy proportions to remember and landmark guidelines that are more than just "draw sphere, draw a cross on that sphere, put your eyes on that cross and manifest a jaw from the ether, slap hair on that and place ears somewhere. You're on your own for the mouth and hairline. Did you do it?" The Loomis method, at least the videos I found, very gently explained where all the lines go and what they're for. Rocky start but I think I'm getting a handle on it? Not an expert, clearly, but I'm getting better.

People are hard. Hands are harder. And yet if I have a reference of exactly what gesture I want to draw, I can do it? Which is very strange. Hand construction still eludes me, so I will be practicing that, along with feet because those are also hard, but I'm actually somehow way better now at just... taking a pic of my hand on the selfie cam on my phone and just... "Okay, yeah, that's what the fingers look like. Makes sense. Let me just slap down the contours for a rough idea of the const-- Oh, nevermind. I just made the hand perfectly the first time..." So yeah, any of the good hands you see are either me looking at my own hand and drawing it directly, me looking at a reference and drawing it directly, or, especially on the monsters, me being incredibly lucky every single time. All the bad hands? Construction or agonizing over trying to utilize indirect reference.

Monsters are easy except when they aren't. Aside from a few small proportion issues that can be easily remedied during the digital inking and coloring phase, I think basically every monster is either exactly what I wanted or pretty damn close. You can see with the Polwigles from 2011 that I was not having a good time trying to construct them. Like, they're spheres, but not really? But they're not hemispheres, and definitely not a hemisphere stacked on a sphere, even though that's the closest approximation. I struggled forever trying to get the body shapes right. And then literally after like, 2 or 3 attempts not shown here on various other projects over the years, I am suddenly the expert with Polwigles? Basically every single doodle I am happy with when it comes to the wigles. They are very inconsistent design-wise between the game and the manga, and since their mouths in the game open almost all the way around during damage animations... I am opting to lean on the design sensibilities of Onshuu no Richter. Still, basically every Polwigle is constructed without reference. So I guess, somehow, after 13 years, I understand the shapes? I dunno how it happened but it did?

I think most of my troubles with the monsters boil down to one of 2 problems: Not being good at construction, that is, constructing unique poses from indirect references to make an educated guess about how a thing would look like from a different angle if we were to rotate or tweak its fundamental shapes in 3 dimensional space. And then not being able to FUCKING SEE THE MONSTERS. JUST LET ME LOOK AT THEM. There are lots of Polwigles from different angles in the manga, so if I NEEDED to use a direct reference, I could. But for the rest of these guys you basically only get the standard 3/4 facing to the left pose from the monster book and if you can even get a clear frame to look at, there's very little dynamism in the pose. The Lailah for example. I wanted to having it point a blade toward the viewer. But the blade is a complicated shape. I am poor with construction so the best I could do is imagine it as a rectangle and sort of carve the contours out of it to the best of my ability to try to get that foreshortened. Because I have no way to study the shape from other angles besides the ones shown directly in the monster book.

The rest of my problems are me standing in my own way. I did try to practice a lot of new skills. Combining references, taking risks, drawing for fun and not just drawing for a final product. And all of them were helpful to a degree. But I think part of the reason my art doesn't turn out well is because I see failing even 2% of the time as being "too much failure." I see anything less than 100% as "not good enough" so I get discouraged and stop trying. Which makes it impossible to learn and grow and also isn't a healthy way to look at art, because even the pros who do this for a living will have pieces that they tear up or don't post because they just... didn't turn out good. To be at a point in my artistic journey where I can even say I like more than half the pieces I did for this draw a thon? That's above average. That's what success looks like for most people.

I think it's the rejection sensitive dysphoria of ADHD. Because I spent so much of my early life either succeeding at everything right away (usually with help and preparation from adults like my mom) and academic "giftedness" I started seeing "success" or "good end products" as things I could reach with little effort. Especially because any time I DID run up against a roadblock or a challenge, I could usually fix it by powering through. Like, if I just did the thing a little harder, I could do it. Which is why whenever I did run up against real challenges, things that needed muscle memory, for example, like riding a bicycle or those Heelie shoes or those waveboards (My obsession with 2 wheeled modes of transportation era was fraught for real) I would have MELTDOWNS because I couldn't just get on a two wheeler bike and go without even learning or trying. Especially because if I saw peers who could do those things "right away" my assumption was always "They're just better than me, I just suck at this thing." and never "they had help learning that I didn't get" or even "different people have different learning curves for the same skills and comparing yourself is a futile exercise."

My assumption was never "that peer spent 3 hours a day for a week falling on their ass just to learn to ride their bike for 3 minutes and then those three minutes eventually became 3 hours and then indefinitely because they finally got the hang of it." My assumption was always "I suck. So if I can't get it in five minutes like they probably did, then I must not be any good and I should give up." Because 5 minutes of really intense effort used to be the magic ingredient to fix the roadblock for other tasks. So I never had reason to assume it wasn't the solution to EVERYTHING.

So I built up this mindset for myself that if I just press harder, I can fix it, and if that doesn't fix it, I can never fix it. And that's been a stumbling block for everything in my life, basically. I brute-forced my way to getting good at basically anything that I'm currently good at. And I'm having to unlearn that. Because growth isn't something you can brute force.

And growth is ALSO not something you can get without failure and risk. Because the other unhealthy mindset I built by brute-forcing my way to success was that I became unfamiliar with failure. Failure was a temporary state of self. My failures were always either easily written off as failure on someone else's part (It's not that I didn't do my homework correctly, it's that the teacher couldn't read it! That's her fault not mine! [incorrect buzzer noise from future me. There are some assignments that I still think this about but, like, no actually young me, a lot of those were actually a you problem and not a teacher problem {The ones that were teacher problems make me livid to this day, but that's another post entirely}]) or they were VERY temporary. "You got this problem incorrect." "Let me look at it again. Okay, I immediately see what I did wrong, I can fix it." "That's correct." "Easy. I just needed to work a little harder." While ADHD, being shuttled ahead through the gifted program, and with how the USAmerican education system treats failure not as a growth opportunity but as a moral failing are certainly contributing factors, I can say with certainty that a lot of the bad mindset surrounding this hurdle for me was also just my lack of drive to try things that were difficult. Why waste time on things that are difficult if there's already so much I can already do that's so easy!?

Then add the cherry on top of the culture we have around failure where it's shameful to ever admit you failed before unless you can turn it into this big inspirational story of how you "learned instantly from that one bad experience and never failed again!" Easy cocktail for an absolute clusterfuck of imposter syndrome, perfectionism, and control freak behavior on my part.

I am having to systematically reprogram my brain. Failure is a part of life. Just because you don't see other people sharing their failures, publicly, online, all the time, doesn't mean that it's not happening.

Watching Scott Christian Sava's content on Youtube has been doing a lot to help me rewire my brain. Failing is part of the process. And I need to learn to be comfortable with it.

And I think I'll have to keep relearning the lesson a few more times before I get it. Because every time I start to internalize it, I backslide and relapse and get back in that old brain-space of "that doesn't apply to me. Everything I do should be easy because that's how it's always been, and if it's not easy the first time, it's because I personally suck and not because I'm growing."

But, little by little, I'm getting better and better. I am catching up to what I used to be in 2011. And in some ways I am getting even better than I was. 10 years of art atrophy isn't great. But climbing back to the summits I've seen before and realizing that a 10 year backslide doesn't mean a 10 year climb is refreshing. I'm still not where I want to be. But I'm discovering more things I like about drawing, more things I want to contribute to my own style, more things I want to polish up on, more things I'm excited to learn.

I've started of thinking of hair as ribbons which is helping me construct more interesting hair in my art, for example. That's new. And fun. Hair is starting to be a less scary thing. I'm incorprorating more natural lip shapes but still leaning into the anime-esque simplifications and exaggerations of expression. I'm getting ever so slightly better at the shape of the palm of the hand. Fingers are still insane foreign objects to me, but I am learning.

I've developed much better line control. And learning to fail means learning that sometimes your lines won't be perfect. But I have also noticed that I'm able, more often than not, to make the strokes I want on the first try when I finalize a drawing.

I'm still messy with my sketches, which does need some work, but I'm getting better at picking the correct shapes out without agonizing over the line stage anymore.

I'm at the point where a lot of the art books I bought in my youth that were so far beyond my skills at the time are actually... full of manageable if not nearly useless advice for me now. I am growing. And while a part of me will always be dissatisfied that I'm growing so slowly, I am still happy that I'm growing.

Thanks again to everyone who participated! I loved seeing the art! I hope to get more DotNW fanfic up soon, too!

And finally, here's the links to the original posts with their original thoughts and captions.

Day 1: Brute Lualdi

Day 2: Assorted Gels

Day 3: Blast From the Past: Aqua and Polwigle sketches from 2011 and Polwigle doodles from July 3 2024

Day 4: Marta Lualdi

Day 5: Assorted Plant Monsters

Day 6: Rilena Malory

Days 7-9: More Plant Monsters

Days 10-12: Decus and Even More Plant Monsters

Days 13-15: Alice, Athos, Porthos, Aramis, and STILL MORE PLANT MONSTERS

Days 16-24: Aqua, Tenebrae, the last of the Plant Monsters, and some Beast monsters

Days 25-31: A couple attempts at Richter Abend, More Polwigles (specifically Pontus from Onshuu no Richter), Emil Castagnier, Aster Laker, Ratatosk, and some more beast monsters