#I think I'm Funny

[aquilacalvitium]

This is what happens when Tum "every day is a celebratory day for something" blr meets a yearly retelling of one of the best and most iconic horror stories in history

Dracula Daily holidays are so funny to me. Every other day I’ll log onto tumblr and see people being like “HAPPY LIZARD FASHION DAY EVERYONE!!” or “foul bauble of man’s vanity day my beloved <3”. I love how we all agree that some parts of this book are so iconic that they must be celebrated. We haven’t even hit Shovel Day yet

[onceandfuturehighpriestess]

Merlin in Diamond of the Day Part 2:

[ihaveatypeanditstrickstergods]

One of my favorite D&D gags that I ever came up with is part of a oneshot I've run a few times where the party is hired by a young wizard to help clear out a few active security measures in a tower that the wizard inherited from her old teacher.

The first obstacle to be cleared is the re-animated skeletons that the old wizard was using for gardening help. It's a pretty straightforward fight, but during the encounter, players may notice one particular raised bed of herbs that is set back in a corner of the garden by itself.

Upon further investigation, this one raised bed is absolutely shining with magical protections. There are runes carved into the wood of the bed, gemstones inlaid in the top of it, this bed is absolutely protected out the ass... and an arcana check shows that the protections are all pointed inward, attempting to keep what's in there from getting out.

What's growing in that raised bed, you may ask? What is so dangerous that the old wizard felt the need to place all these protections?

Mint.

[euniexenoblade]

YOU know him as the human pet guy, I know him as the "modern militaries need medieval armor cuz they reflect bullets" guy. We are NOT the same.

[angelfire115]

"I know you're going through a crisis right meow but my food bowl is empty so I'll need you to do something about that right meow."

[3bagshotrow]

going to make one of those "WATCHING LORD OF THE RINGS FOR THE **FIRST TIME**" videos on youtube but say things like "wow boromir looks especially rugged in these mountain scenes, almost like the actor actually hiked to the filming location instead of taking a helicopter" and "wouldn't it be funny if all those soldiers from rohan were women in fake beards" and "his scream sounded really genuine there, I wonder if he broke any of his toes"

[leavemebetosleep]

Damn I Love Fluttershy

[alopiassupersillyosus]

When the key is a hex or something idk I didn't watch Arcane

[authormars]

MC: How do angels reproduce?

Simeon: Well, it's a very complicated process and the Father-

Lucifer: Mitosis

MC:

Simeon:

Lucifer, pointing to Satan: Mitosis

[aaayyygender]

Running with the burrito I just got (stole) from Chipotle while a HATER cop tries to catch me:

[percythejedi]

This is all I have to contribute

[armageddon-is-light-after-dark]

Cause it's a chocolate chip cookie I can get involved in

@serena-darrin and @yubsie plus @othernaut

Wake up babe! New cookbook just dropped!

[thevoidstaredback]

Nightwing: "We'll have to talk to Agent A, but it shouldn't be a problem."

Flash: "'Agent A'? Who's that? And why do you need to ask their permission? Batman's right here."

Nightwing: "You don't actually think Batman's in charge, do you?"

Flash: "What?"

Nightwing: "We can get away with upsetting B, but we'd all rather die than upset A. It's why their names like that, by the way. A's in charge, B's just the public figure."

Batman: "That's not true and you know it,"

Nightwing: "You gonna look me in the eye and say that?"

Batman: "..."

Nightwing: "That's what I thought."

[mxxnpills]

please laugh

[agenderautomaton]

[realitysperception]

Hope you don't mind if I just do a lil' silly...

As much as I love the idea of Drift being protective of Ratchet, nothing gets me going more than Ratty taking care of his Drift. So when you posted about how Drift gets sick often and Ratchet rushes to his aid, I was like oh! oh! that's what I'm talkin about!

Protective Ratty is real and ever vigilant