#I think I’d rather kill myself but yeah man

[lurochar]

Well-Fed

It isn't wise to harass Alastor's assistant. A man learns this the hard way.

Human Alastor x Reader

Warnings: Violence, unknowing cannibalism

--

What a pleasant night.

“F-fuck, please – what do you want?! I’ll… I’ll do anything!” The man pleaded, sniveling as he tried to crawl back, “J-just don’t kill me!”

What lovely begging.

Alastor hummed, eyeing the fallen man as he wondered in which way he should slaughter him that would best satisfy him and his current needs.

Should he just blow the man’s brain out? It’s not like he needed his head for anything – nothing really too edible there. It always made such a mess.

Maybe cut the man’s throat and make it a quick one? It always did give him a thrill to watch the life fade from one’s eyes and the absolute terror on their faces when there was nothing to be done. 

Possibly chop the man’s limbs off and watch him slowly bleed to death? He would probably put up too much of a fight and ruin too much of his meat and it would take far too long.

“Do you remember me?” Alastor asked, causing the man’s eyes to finally look at his face rather than the rifle in hand, “Or actually, do you remember the woman at the radio station earlier today?”

“Y-yeah, ‘course I remember you!” The man simpered, as if sucking up would actually save his life, “You’re Alastor Hartfelt, right? That radio host who’s the talk of the town right now?” His face twitched, “So, why you doing this?! Don’t fucking tell me…!” His eyes widened when he finally figured it out.

He wasn’t getting out of here alive.

“I asked, ‘do you remember the woman at the radio station earlier today’?” Alastor didn’t flinch in the least as he pulled his axe from the holster at his hip, swinging it down in a smooth motion, and easily severing the man’s hand.

He was screaming now, of course, in complete shock at the brutal action and he tried to scramble to his feet to run for his life, but Alastor already had his rifle at the ready, easily shooting him in the foot before he could do anything.

“I’d rather not repeat myself for a third time,” Alastor looked on in a bit of distaste when the man vomited, heaving and twitching around in agony. “It is why you are here, after all.”

The man didn’t answer or didn’t even hear him as he curled up into a sad little ball, causing Alastor to sigh in slight disappointment that his hunt was already over, but preparing meat took time and he had already invited you over to dinner the next night, so it was fine.

“Didn’t your mother teach you any manners?” Alastor knew he was talking to himself at this point as he knelt down as he reached for his knife from his belt, “I’d rather you not treat women like objects that you can use whenever you feel like it. Far too many men are like this. Imagine how Y/N felt when you cornered her in my radio station and groped her like a mindless animal? Perhaps as helpless as you are now? In any case, I do not tolerate any disrespect of such kind, especially with my lovely little assistant.”

He was rambling, he knew, he always did get like this when it came to you and your wellbeing.

“I’ve spent too much time on you,” Alastor tightened his grip on his knife, “I have a meal to prepare. I do hope you taste better than you look, my good chum.”

He hoped you liked Jambalaya.

–

“This is amazing!”

Alastor smiled, feeling absolutely pleased at your joyful expression as you took a bite of his cooking, clearly delighting in the flavour, “It’s my mother’s recipe, you see.” His eyes flashed, a dark satisfaction building up in him, “I’m glad you like it. I thought the meat might have been of too low quality.”

“No, no!” You went to reassure him, “I’m nothing fancy!” You eagerly took another bite. “You are a very good cook. Your mother must have taught you well. She must be very proud.”

“I would like to think so.” Alastor’s smile softened briefly at the thought, “I do try to be nothing less than a true gentleman. I believe my mother would have liked you very much so. I would like to share more of her recipes with you, if I may be so bold to ask?”

You flushed, looking down at your food before peering back up to Alastor with a shy smile, “I would like that too.” You did not recognize the mania behind Alastor’s eyes as you continued to eat his cooking.

“I’ll keep you well-fed, my dear.”

[punksyeet]

- Jealousy ❥

Plot: After watching her man do a segment with another female on television, Gianna (OC) becomes super jealous. And let’s just say that, when he finds out, she’s snapped right back out of her delusions.

Warning: Hefty flirting and smut!

It's Monday night and I just finished an everything shower and changed into some comfy PJs.

I make some popcorn, head to my couch, and wrap myself in a comfy blanket.

"Right on time," I whisper, smiling as the classic WWE introduction appears on my screen.

Tiffany Stratton is opening the show, so I take the opportunity to text my boyfriend Josh.

My Lady 💍🩵: Hi lovebug. Have a good show. I'll be watching! <3

My Love 🤍: Thank you babygirl. Your support means the world. I love you. ❤️

My Lady 💍🩵: I love you too 🫶🏽

Some time later, the Bloodline appears on my screen and I smile and get comfy in my seat.

Josh is wearing a black shirt that reads "Right Hand Man" and his hair is all damp and curly.

He's standing between his brother and cousin, who share some rather negative looks.

"One day, Uce, you gon' be in the Hall of Fame," Josh’s twin brother, Jon, begins. "Yeah! Future Hall of Famer! But you ain't gon' be inducted as Roman Reigns, Uce. You gon' be inducted as a spoiled bitch."

I raise my eyebrows, as I pop another piece of popcorn into my mouth, my eyes never leaving the screen.

"You see what he's doing?" Joe, their cousin, asks after turning to him. "What'd I tell you? You see how he's putting you out there in the middle?"

"Ain't nobody doing that, Uce!" Jon fights back.

And soon enough, they're talking over one another, both trying to get into Josh’s head.

I watch, heavily intrigued, as my boyfriend finally spazzes out on them both.

"Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Chill out! Enough!" he yells. "Man, I'm tired of this!”

“I’m tired of you!” he continues, turning to Jon.

“And I’m tired of you!” he says again, but turned to Joe this time.

There’s some silence before Josh finally breaks it again. “Man I’m out!”

Eyes widened, I sit there chewing slowly.

Did he really just walk away from them?

Is he finally cracking after all the manipulation?

While Jon and Joe continue arguing on the screen, all I can think about is Josh.

I know WWE is scripted - hell I work for the company - but it almost kills me to see Jey hurting so bad.

As the show rolls on, I unexpectedly see my man on the screen again.

Two segments in one night? I see you baby!

I sit up and smile, until a female makes her way over to him. And this said female is......B-Fab?!

My smile slowly fades as I turn up the volume.

"Hi Jey," she coos flirtatiously, stroking his biceps. "I saw you and your family arguing earlier. And uh, I just wanted to let you know that if you ever need someone, I'm here."

She kisses his cheek and prances away.

He doesn't speak a word in reply - he kinda just stands there, arms folded, with a look on his face.

A look of confusion I’d say.

My cheeks become hot to the touch and my blood pressure must've increased by 500.

I know I shouldn't be acting this way, but I can't help it.

That bitch was all over him.

And putting her crusty lips on his face? Really?

I let out a deep sigh, turn off my TV, and head to my bedroom.

About half an hour after the show ends, my phone rings.

I look at the contact name: My Love 🤍

I take a deep breath before answering.

G: "Hi."

J: "Hey baby. Whatchu up to?"

G: "Relaxing in bed."

J: "Oh. You're not watching the show?"

G: "I turned it off early tonight."

There's a bit of silence and he breaks it.

J: "Gotcha. So what'd you think? Jon and Joe killed it, huh?"

G: "Yeah."

There's a pause again.

J: "Is everything alright ma? You sound kinda...out of it?"

G: "I'm fine."

J: "Nah your 'I'm fine' means the exact opposite. What's wrong?"

G: "I said I'm fine."

J: "But, baby, you're no-"

G: "Babe I'm fine."

He stays silent once again.

J: "Alright ma, if you say so. I just called to give you an update. I'm headed home now."

G: "Okay."

I hate that I’m so upset over this, but you can’t blame me.

That bitch was all over him.

J: "Baby, are you sure nothing is wrong? Please talk to me."

G: "It's nothing. I promise."

There's yet another moment of silence, and I hear him take a deep breath before speaking again.

J: "Any chance this is about my segment tonight?"

I stop in my tracks and stay silent for a minute.

Maybe if I play dumb he’ll believe me.

G: "Why would a bloodline segment bother me? You guys have been fighting for weeks."

J: "Baby, you know what I mean. My segment with B-Fab."

G: "Oh."

J: "Oh?"

I sigh, mentally facepalming myself.

G: "I know I shouldn't be jealous. I know it's all scripted. I know we get paid to do stuff like this. I know it's strictly professional. But I can't stand how close she was to you."

He lets out a deep sigh before responding.

J: "I understand my love. I'm sorry if it upset you."

G: "No, Josh. You don't need to apologize. I'm the one that got jealous. And I should know better. I'm sorry."

J: "Once again ma, I completely understand."

A moment of silence falls over the call before he speaks up again.

J: "How about I come over and we can have the night all to ourselves? That way we can talk in person."

G: "Are you sure? I don't wanna get in the way if you had plans to go home."

J: "Babygirl, you know you're never in the way. I'll see you in a bit. I love you."

G: "I love you too."

—————————————————————————————————

About twenty minutes later, I hear my front door open and close.

The sound is followed by footsteps that get closer and closer to my bedroom.

Josh knocks on the door and peeks his head in. "Baby?"

"Hi," is all I can utter out.

I feel so guilty.

He gives me a soft smile, shuts the door behind him, and walks over.

"Hi beautiful," he replies, leaning down and wrapping his arms around me.

He smells incredible. And feels incredible too. So warm and soft. So comforting.

I take a deep breath, resting my head on his chest, as he rubs my back.

"You okay?" he asks, pulling out of the hug, his hands moving to my arms.

I shake my head slowly. "I feel so guilty. I don't know why I got like that. I'm so sorry."

A soft smile appears on his face, as he tucks a curl behind my ear. "Like I told you a thousand times, I understand mama. If anything, I'm glad you still get jealous after all this time we've been together."

I raise an eyebrow. "Really?"

He nods. "Really."

I can't help but smile.

He truly knows every way to make me feel better.

"There's that beautiful smile," he coos, cupping my face and stroking my cheek with his thumb.

After a few seconds of staring into each other's eyes, he leans in and presses his lips to mine.

I sigh in the kiss and practically melt in his arms.

I'm so lucky. So lucky that he's all mine. So lucky that he loves me and only me. My beautiful boy.

After a few strokes, we slowly pull away.

He gently lays me down and hovers over me and resumes the kiss, as his cold chain brushes against my chest.

He eventually moves down to my neck, giving me light and wet kisses across my chest.

"Ba-" I try to speak but he interrupts.

"Shhh," he says quietly. "I love you and only you, princess. Let daddy prove that to you."

"Baby you don't have to prove anyth-" I begin but I'm cut off again.

This time, by him pressing his lips to mine once more.

** smut warning! **

The kiss turns steamy quick, as his hands slide up my shirt and play with my breasts.

"Mmm," I moan into the kiss, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him closer.

"You like that mama?" he mumbles against my lips, and proceeds to glide his tongue across mine.

"Mhm," I reply, tugging at his bottom lip softly.

"Use your words baby," he orders, sliding one of his hands up to my neck and ever so gently gripping it.

"Y-yes daddy," I utter between moans.

He smirks and brushes his thumb across my bottom lip. "Good girl."

Moans uncontrollably pour out of my mouth as he kisses his way down my body, giving me tons on my inner thighs.

"J-Josh?" I whisper, my fingers wrapped in his curls.

"Hm?" he replies, in between kisses.

I bite my lip and hesitate before speaking up. "C-can you fuck me already?"

He lifts his head up and raises an eyebrow once his eyes meet mine. "Feeling extra impatient tonight, I take it?"

I nod, my bottom lip between my teeth. "Very. I need you so bad baby."

"Well then," he begins, taking off his shirt and exposing his sexy tattooed chest and torso. "What my baby girl wants, my baby girl gets."

I softly moan at his dirty words, as he reaches down and pulls up my shirt.

Once it's completely off, he throws it across the room.

"Look at you mama," he coos, playing with my breasts once again. "So fucking sexy. How you could even remotely think I'd want anyone else.....it's insane."

My back automatically arches and my face practically meets my headboard as he takes both of my breasts into his mouth and buries his face between them.

And soon enough, he slides my shorts off, kissing down my body and places a wet one just above my pussy.

"Daddy stop teasing mee!" I whine, tugging at his hair.

He smirks, buries his head between my legs, and proceeds to give me the best head of my life.

From his thick tongue, to his plump and soft lips, I feel like I'm ascending the entire time.

After he swallows my cum, he gives my clit one last kiss and sits up.

"Flip over and get on all fours," he orders.

I obey and, as I'm doing so, he pulls down his sweats and boxers.

He kneels behind me, pressing his dick onto my ass and places one hand on my hip and the other on my back, signaling for me to arch it.

"Mmmm," he moans, slapping my ass. "You're such a good girl for me baby. I love you so fucking much."

"I love you too daddy," I reply.

He bends over my back, pulls my neck up gently, and pulls me in for a sloppy kiss.

"Mmm fuck me," I mumble against his lips, and proceed to suck on his tongue.

He chuckles, tugging on my lip gently, and whispers in my ear. "You got it sexy girl."

Moments later, he's absolutely railing me, giving me the best back shots I've had in a painfully long amount of time.

Once I'm used to his size, I start throwing it back and bouncing on his long and dreamy cock.

"Fuck baby," he whispers, grabbing my ass and thrusting into me harder. "You take this dick so good. You're daddy's girl. Forever."

As moans uncontrollably leave my body, I reach back and he instantly takes my hand and intertwines our fingers.

He kisses my knuckles and continues railing into me. "This is my pussy, right baby?"

"Uh huh," is all I can get out, my face pressed against the pillow and mouth hanging open.

"Use your words, pretty girl. I wanna hear you say it. Whose pussy is this?" he asks, still thrusting into me.

"I-it's your pussy d-daddy. M-my pussy b-be-belongs to you. And only you." I say, obeying his every word.

He slaps my ass. "That's right princess. Good girl."

About fifteen thrusts later, I explode everywhere. With zero warning.

Oh the things this man does to me.

** smut over! **

Once he pulls out, I plop down, panting like crazy, my face never leaving the pillow.

He chuckles and cleans me up, then proceeds to lay next to me and rub my back. "You feel good baby?"

I nod slowly, unable to speak a word.

"Good," he replies and kisses my bottom lip. "I'll get a bath started, okay?"

I nod again and finally start to catch my breath, and he kisses my shoulder and heads to the bathroom.

** Josh's POV **

Just as I'm shutting the faucet for my lady's bath, the door opens.

I look up and my beautiful lady is standing there, her hair all messy, but her face as gorgeous and glowy as ever.

"Hi baby," she coos, blushing hard.

I stand up, giving her a warm smile as I kiss her cheek. "Hi beautiful. You okay?"

She nods and plays with my hair. "I just gotta pee."

We share a laugh and I move out of her way. "You're adorable mama. Go ahead."

Once she finishes, I take her hand and help her into the tub.

"Mmm," she moans lightly, as she sinks into the water.

Watching over her, I smile.

I love when my lady is relaxed. It relaxes me.

"Is it good mama? Need anything changed?" I ask, feeling the water.

She shakes her head. "It's perfect."

I smile and kiss the top of her hand. "I'm glad, baby. I'll be in the bedroom if you need me."

I start heading towards the door until she calls me. "Baby?"

I turn around, looking back.

She holds out her arms as if she's asking for a hug. "Join me?”

I smile and gladly accept, wrapping my arms around her and kissing her neck.

Soon enough, we're both in the tub - my beautiful lady's back against me.

"I love you baby," I coo, and proceed to kiss her temple.

She rests her head on my shoulder so that she can look up and see me.

We make eye contact and she smiles, brushing our noses together. "I love you too Josh. More than anything. More than you'll ever know."

I hold her chin gently and we share a kiss.

Not a peck. But not a makeout.

Just a sweet, lengthy, and passionate kiss.

My favorite kind of kiss to share with the love of my life.

About twenty minutes later, we finish our bath.

I help her wrap into her fuzzy robe and watch as she does her skincare.

She's so stunning without even trying. I'll never understand it.

She catches me staring through the mirror and smirks. "What are you lookin at?"

I flash a soft smile and playfully slap her juicy ass. "You."

"Take a picture," she begins. "It'll last longer."

I raise an eyebrow and fold my arms. "Maybe. But that pussy of yours won't if you don't relax yourself."

Her mouth drops open and I take the opportunity while I can, grabbing her face and shoving my tongue down her throat.

It turns into our third makeout of the night, as I lift her up and put her on the counter.

Her arms wrap around my neck, her hands stroking my curls.

Best feeling ever.

My hands slide down her hips, stroking her inner thighs and pulling her in closer.

"Mmm," she moans, pushing my hands away and separating our mouths. "Baby my pussy has been through enough tonight."

I smirk, licking my lips. "Alright you get a pass tonight. But once you feel up to it, you're all mine."

She giggled and kisses the corner of my mouth. "Deal."

I kiss her temple and head into our bedroom to find something to sleep in.

I lay in bed, scrolling through my phone, until I see my lady walking out of the bathroom.

I smile as she walks over and climbs into bed.

I wrap her in my arms and she lays her head on my chest.

"Tonight was a dream," she begins. "Maybe I should claim to be jealous more often."

I chuckle and kiss her cheek. "No need, mama. Just say the words and I'll gladly fuck your brains out any time."

She smirks, plays with my beard, and yawns.

"Get some sleep babygirl," I whisper, running my fingers through her hair.

Her favorite feeling.

She nods and kisses my cheek. "I love you."

I smile and kiss hers back. "I love you too mama. Goodnight."

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[tgmsunmontue]

Season to Taste - 35/42 WIP

Explicit Hangster - Celebrity Chef Bradley and Naval Aviator Jake Seresin who have a relationship spanning the globe before they realize how tightly bound they are to one another.

PROLOGUE/ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT NINE TEN (interlude) ELEVEN TWELVE THIRTEEN FORTEEN FIFTEEN SIXTEEN SEVENTEEN EIGHTEEN NINETEEN TWENTY (interlude) TWENTYONE TWENTYTWO TWENTYTHREE TWENTYFOUR TWENTYFIVE TWENTYSIX TWENTYSEVEN TWENTYEIGHT TWENTYNINE THIRTY (interlude) THIRTYONE THIRTYTWO THRTYTHREE THIRTYFOUR

Family tree if you need/want it.

(No new warnings apply if you've been reading along, but explicit sex, very mild (soft?) D/s, little bit of praise kink raising its head and some pins put in conversation points...)

CHAPTER THIRTYFIVE

                “Do you ever want to get married?”

                “One day. Why? You asking?”

                “You’ll know when I’m asking,” Jake says, poking Bradley in the side and making him squirm away from probing tickling fingers.

                “Yeah? You going to ask me huh? What about if I ask you first?”

                “Not really particular about how it happens to be honest… can’t imagine marrying anyone else. Can’t imagine my life without you in it…”

                “Jake…” He’s pretty sure Jake hadn’t said any of that to be overly romantic, just his natural sweet nature coming out and Bradley loves how soft he is with him. “I can’t imagine my life without you either. Don’t want to.”

                “Good. Glad we agree on that.”

                “Would you wear a wedding ring? Or engagement ring?”

                “Of course. Might be with my tags rather than on my finger though. You okay with that?”

                “Yeah. Of course I am.”

…            …            …

                Maria has been very fucking smug, tugging or patting his dog tags and the newly acquired ring that now hangs around his neck every time she gets within touching distance. She’s definitely not let him forget that she suspected Leo had a ring ready for him as well. He’s hugging everyone goodbye, and it’s odd flying out of Corpus Christi with so many of his family there, Leo and the Gallos as well, because usually he flies to New York to see him for a brief twenty-four hours before heading to his new station. But he’s going further inland for once, back to Fallon and he’s looking forward to it.

                He kisses Leo goodbye, ignores the catcalling and wolf-whistles his assembled sisters give. He’s newly engaged and he’s allowed to be very glad it’s only three months and that Leo already has plans to come and visit in only six weeks. For three whole nights, an entire weekend. Jake’s already looking forward to it, suspects he won’t step outside his base accommodation for the duration of Leo’s stay, given how his previous shore and liberty leave has panned out when Leo is there. He can’t wait.

…            …            …

                “You know… we could open a third Tartaruga in California. Now that you’re, you know, talking to your godfather…”

                “Don’t say godfather like that, we’re not part of the Mafia…”

                “I don't know, the family drama of it all, there being one man who holds all the power and everyone follows their orders or fears the repercussion? Sounds very Mafia like to me.”

                “Vi…”

                “Bradley…”

                “It’s… I don’t know if I’m ready to spread myself so thin again. Not with Ice’s health the way it is, and then the whole family thing. And now a wedding to plan…”

                “If you think you’re getting any say on the wedding with Jake’s sisters in the picture coupled with Silvia? I mean… I’d tell you to elope if I didn’t think they’d kill you both.”

                “Ugh. I know… and we don’t care about the wedding you know? We both care about the marriage, and having that little piece of paper to show just how committed we are. But…”

                “But it’s going to be a massive fucking family reunion of epic proportions and you better be prepared for your wedding ceremony to simply be one of the highlights.”

                “We’re both okay with that. It’ll be kind of nice. But I’m glad I’m not going to be around while they fight out where the wedding should be.”

                “I still think you should have two…”

                “Can you imagine trying to organize two?” Bradley groans, banging his head against her shoulder in an attempt to elicit some sympathy but she pushes him off.

                “You aren’t going to be doing any organizing anyway… Nonna’s olive grove would be nice. For a small and quiet ceremony anyway.”

                “Huh. Yeah… it would be. Civil ceremony anyway.”

                “Yep. And that will be the ace in Jake’s sisters’ hands…” Bradley snorts, rubs at his face and eyes, feeling very tired all of a sudden. “So. New restaurant?”

                “Ugh. How, why, is that an easier topic of conversation than my wedding?”

                “Because we don’t actually have to follow through on the restaurant,” Violet says with a laugh and Bradley groans, but she has a point. “And I was thinking, staying on theme but without using russo or arancione. How do you feel about Scheggia?”

                “Fuck no… that sounds awful. No-one will be able to pronounce it. And Splinter? Really?”

                “Thought it was fitting with the whole old-mentors living there… and how your relationship with them was for so long…”

                “Splintered. Haha. Very clever… Not like that now though.”

                “I know. How did Jake take it anyway, when you told him?”

                “Fuck. I completely forgot.”

                “Forgot? Or too busy fucking?”

                “Uh… both?”

                “Well, at least you’re honest.”

                “Yeah… I don’t know how to tell him. But I really need to.”

                “Well, you said you wanted to do it person, but you keep either conveniently forgetting or getting distracted…”

                “Sue me. My boyfriend is hot.”

                “Fidanzato,” Vi corrects and Bradley can’t help the fact that his grin gets wider.

                “Yeah. Fidanzato.”

                “Ugh. You’re sickening.”

…            …            …

                “I’m a promised man Phoenix.”

                “Yeah? Your Rooster finally propose huh?”

                “I asked him. Beat him to it.”

                “Of course you did. Well, I admit I have ulterior motives, but I’m happy for you Bagman…”

                “You’ll actually have to meet him now. Probably at the wedding if you’re on leave…”

                He wonders if he should try and introduce them when Leo comes to stay, except those are precious moments and he knows he doesn’t like sharing when he’s not on proper leave.

                “You don’t need to invite me to the wedding Bagman…”

                “With how much food there’s probably going to be, I need people that know how to eat…”

                “What are you implying?”

                “That you have a healthy appetite and you’ll appreciate the food, if nothing else.”

                “Hmm. I guess I can come. If I’m available.”

                “Glad to hear it. Date is still… undecided. Turns out my ancestors and Leo’s are all like, related.”

                “Uh… okay?” Phoenix says, and she’s grimacing and Jake runs through the words and realizes his mistake and laughs, shakes his head.

                “Oh. He’s not… he’d be like my fourth cousin once removed I think? But he’s adopted pretty much so… we’re not actually related. Fiancés now though.”

                “Yeah… what has that got to do with the date being undecided?”

                “Oh. Our wedding is going to be a massive family reunion I guess. I just left my sisters in charge with Leo’s parents, told them they can hash it out because as long as I’m married to Leo at the end of the day I don’t care what else happens…”

                “You don’t want to look good?”

                “Trace, I always look good.”

                She rolls her eyes at that and Jake just laughs, because nothing can bring him down.

…            …            …

                Six weeks fly by, and he flies out to California to visit Ice. Vi has insisted on coming with him, both to finally meet Ice and Maverick, and then to Fallon, saying she’s more than happy to get her own hotel room and entertain herself. It’s a little out-of-character but he doesn’t want to pry, because she’ll tell him if he needs to know. They don’t get as much time just the two of them any more so he’s happy to go along with it. He gets the taxi to drop her off at the hotel first before settling back for the drive to the base. He remembers vaguely coming here once as a kid, visiting Ice he thinks and he still has to figure out exactly how to break the existence of that relationship to Jake. Not that he expects Jake to be upset or angry, or even really surprised. Jake knows Slider and a couple of others that Bradley is more friendly with. None of them are as highly ranked as Ice though. None of them have quite the same reputation that Mav does.

                He hitches his bag over his shoulder, knocks on the door for the address Jake gave him and waits. Then the door opens, he’s being pulled inside by the strap of his bag, then it’s being taken from him and thrown toward the sofa and Jake’s mouth is on his for the briefest of moments before Jake is then kissing along his jaw. His fingers are on Bradley’s fly, pulling the zipper down and unhooking his belt with practiced fingers and he groans, wiggles a bit to help them fall down.

                “Fuck Jake…”

                “Mmm… missed you.”

                “Yeah? Never would have guessed…” Bradley says with a laugh, his head hitting the wall behind him as Jake palms his cock through his underwear. He’s been half-hard for the last twelve hours, since this morning when he’d fingered himself and slicked up the plug Jake has deemed his favorite. He’s rapidly shifting to full hardness with the attention and he wonders exactly what Jake has planned.

                “First time we’ve been apart since we got engaged…” Jake murmurs into the shell of his ear and he’s reminded just how sweet and sappy Jake can be. “I’m going to make you come so hard and so fast. Then I’m going to spend all day tomorrow keeping you right on the edge… see if we can make a new record.”

                “Fuck…” Bradley breathes, because sweet and sappy Jake is also hot and possessive Jake. Bradley lets himself melt and relax under his fingers and lips. “Yes please…”

                “Mmm. Thought you’d like that idea. Come on, let me take you to bed.”

…            …            …

                He learnt early on in their relationship that Leo really likes it when Jake marks him up, which is good because Jake has come to really enjoy leaving the marks. Learnt that he can make Leo come even harder if he presses on some marks a little. So he’s started leaving a couple the first time the have sex after they’ve been apart; has caught Leo looking at his reflection and running fingers over the marks with a soft smile on his face. Seeing that had made Jake finally feel like Leo liked the pain, wasn’t just saying words he thought Jake wanted to hear.

                “Did you do what I asked?” Jake asks, and he knows Leo will have, he’s never not followed Jake’s suggestions or instructions. But it’s how Leo responds to the question that Jake waits for, to judge just what kind of mood Leo is in. Jake will let it guide him, trusts Leo now to also say what he needs or wants.

                “Why don’t you check and find out…”

                Little bit bratty it is then, and he’s never spanked Leo, but sometimes he wonders. When he’s slapped his ass in passing, Jake’s definitely noted the sharp inhale, and if he’s looking for it the widening of Leo’s pupils with arousal. Of course, it’s not exactly conclusive evidence but maybe something worth exploring. To talk about when they have more time. Right now though he wants to simply gather him in his arms and sink his cock into him. Leo is so relaxed and trusting, it turns him on more and more each time.

                Their clothes get shoved off without any ceremony and he loves that they’re still like this even after three years. He runs a curious finger between Leo’s ass cheeks, feels the flare of the plug, the slickness of lube. Captures Leo’s lips in another kiss, bites at his bottom lip and lets his fingers dig in hard on his hip, savors the prickle of Leo’s moustache against his lip and the jerk of his body toward Jake, savors the way his body jitters a little before he settles under Jake’s hands.

                He thinks of the times when he’s tied Leo’s hands with his apron strings, stopping him from touching himself, even though he won’t if Jake tells him not to. Remembers seeing the faint red marks the strings had left afterwards, not deep or cutting, but pressed into Leo’s skin and yeah, he really wants to talk about that as well, when they don’t barely have longer than forty-eight hours together. Right now Leo is shuffling up the bed on his back like an awkward looking crab, trying to push off the blankets with one foot while he reaches for Jake at the same time. Everything they need is already at hand and he follows Leo up the bed, presses him down and licks over a nipple before sinking his teeth in just to the side.

                Leo’s body arches off the bed but Jake is used to it now, was already pressing him back and digging his teeth a little harder, feels Leo’s cock jerk against his thigh where he’s grinding against him. Hard and fast. That’s what he promised. He reaches for the pump bottle of lube, gets his hand slick and then wraps it around both their cocks, slotting them together as he shifts and grinds, not letting go from where he’s sucking what will be a purpling bruise on Leo’s chest. One he can suck and press later and make Leo see stars.

                “Jake…”

                “Uh uh uh… hands above your head baby.”

                Leo squirms but does exactly what he asks, there’s no headboard with convenient slats for Leo to slip his fingers around. Instead Jake watches as he grips a pillow tightly, muscles in his arms flexing and he hums his approval, goes back to sucking at the same spot. He pulls back and sits up, stops stroking their cocks and lets go completely, looks down at the flushed splotches all over Leo’s body, mouth slack, eyelids flickering and Jake grips Leo’s hip and digs his fingers in hard before letting go and reaching up to slide two fingers into Leo’s mouth.

                “Make them nice and wet for me…”

                While Leo sucks on his fingers Jake taps on the base of the plug, a little meanly because he knows it’s resting on Leo’s prostate. Leo’s cock jerks and dribbles a little and Jake knows Leo probably hasn’t gotten himself off for two days; Jake just asked him to try. He’s pretty confident he has maybe done very well.

                “You been waiting for this a while?”

                Leo nods around his fingers, doesn’t stop sucking and Jake presses a quick kiss to the middle of his chest.

                “You’re so good for me…”

                Unlike Leo, Jake has come recently, but he’s hard, thinking about what he wants to do. Wants to fuck him until Leo comes. Twice. Hard and fast and then Jake can just lie behind him and grind away, take his time, really drag it out until Leo is almost crying from the overstimulation. He’d promised hard and fast. But he’d kept this up his sleeve, wants to surprise Leo with it because it’s something he’d mentioned in one of their phone calls. They’ve gotten very good at phone sex, but also talking when they’re apart is good too. Let’s them really dig into things sometimes. What they want to do to each other when they’re next together is usually a favorite, especially after they’ve already gotten each other off.

                He slides the plug out, gets more lube. Leo was clearly generous but Jake has plans so he uses more than usual and then wipes his hand in the towel. Looks back at Leo to find him being watched under hooded eyes and he slips his fingers out of his mouth and bends down to kiss him, wiping his fingers on the bedsheet. Leo is shifting, getting impatient and he slaps a hand on his hip to still him and Leo’s entire body shudders.

                Okay. Definitely talking about that then. Later though.

                He urges Leo over onto all fours, urges him to the edge so Jake can stand, knows this is going to be best for leverage and fuck he’s a gorgeous sight, body all flushed, ass in the air, hole slick with lube, shoulders pressed into the bed like he’s already bracing himself and yeah, Jake isn’t going to make him wait. Quickly wipes himself and reaches for a condom when he hears Leo mumble and he pauses.

                “I… you don’t… uh… we should talk about that…”

                “What?”

                “Condoms. I’m… uh.”

                Oh.

                Jake thinks he gets what Leo is trying to say, but yeah, they should apparently have several more conversations when they aren’t naked and in the middle of sex. He can talk about it though, pretend he is, watch Leo fall apart thinking about it. Knows he can’t see what Jake is doing so tries to be quiet as he tears the foil and slides the condom on.

                “You think about me fucking you bare?” Jake asks as he pushes in, and the little high-pitched whine Leo makes telling him more than enough. “So hot and tight around me baby. Feel so good. Always do…”

                “Jake…”

                “Yeah baby, I’ve got you…” He let’s his fingers grip as hard as he needs to, pulling and holding Leo’s ass and hips as he fucks into him, setting a brutal pace. “You want to feel me come inside you huh? You jerk off thinking about that?”

                “Yes.”

                Jake groans, thinks about it, thinks about just letting himself come and then going soft while still inside Leo’s body.

                “Fuck. Touch yourself… don’t hold back Leo, want you to come as soon as you’re ready. Come on…”

                He pulls out every little trick he knows, lets his pace pick up and shifts his angle to ensure the head of his cock is pressing into Leo’s prostate with every inward thrust, his fingers on his hips pulling and holding Leo to him, reaches around and scrapes his nails over one of Leo’s nipples before letting his hand travel around and scrape down the long line of his back, watches the skin turn white from the pressure as he watches Leo’s arm jacking himself off.

                “Come on baby… want you to come for me… be good for me now…”

                Leo comes with a sob and Jake runs soothing hands down his back and over his hips, lets himself just enjoy the closeness and the feeling of a job well done, a little smug that he knows Leo so well. He pulls out carefully, encourages Leo onto his side and further up the bed, makes a half-assed attempt at wiping away Leo’s come from the bed sheet. His hands are gentle now that he’s left plenty of marks to make Leo happy and for him to pay attention to later.

                Now is for him, and as he settles behind Leo and he thinks about the next time he does this, maybe even an early morning, not having to worry about fishing out a condom. Just sliding into Leo’s body and he groans as he pushes back in, rocking his hips in a slower longer drawn-out pace, because he’s going to keep doing this until Leo gets hard again and then, and only then will Jake let himself come.

…            …            …

                “Back with me…?” Jake asks, pressing soft kisses along his hairline and Bradley feels woozy, his blood still far too occupied elsewhere in his body to assist his brain with coherent thought.

                “Mmm. If that’s engaged sex I cannot wait for married sex…”

                “Baby, we’re like fine wine. We’re only going to get better as we age.”

                “You don’t like wine…” Bradley mumbles and feels Jake laugh rather than hears him.

                “God I love you.”

                “Mmm. Love you too…”

                He lies there in the quiet, lets Jake hold him close, obligingly takes sips of water when offered the bottle, can’t help the smile on his face. He’s just so profoundly happy, can’t imagine life getting better than it is right in the moment. His stomach rumbles and he feels Jake laugh again and it’s one of his favorite feelings, Jake holding him and happy.

                “I am planning on feeding you. I was hoping to take you out to dinner and introduce you to one of my friends, but she apparently has better things to do. She passes on her thanks and gratitude though, apparently I’m always in a much better mood when I come back from seeing you…”

                “Hmm. I wonder why that is.”

                “Sounds like something we should look into…”

                “Yeah? Do some research?” Bradley asks

                “Yeah. Definitely. Come up with a scientific method. Test it over and over…”

                “Yeah, okay. Let’s do that.”

THIRTY-SIX

[bongolia]

Pete and Jerry being GAY

It was around 2am, Pete’s room smelled like weed and shitty beer as he and Jerry dicked around throughout the night. Pete found a gore movie in a collection his cousin gave him, one that he made Jerry watch with him. The movie starred two men who had been stuck in a cycle of trying to kill each other, the issue was that the movie slowly got homoerotic. 

As Jer and I watch Men Slayer (1981), I feel myself becoming more and more uneasy. The scenes became gayer and much more intense as the movie went on. I keep looking over at Jerry, trying to see what he thought of the movie (really trying to see if he was looking at me). I didn’t want him to think I was some fag. He keeps his eyes locked on the screen, nothing but a fixed look across his face. I turn back to the screen, watching as the men messily undress each other, blood painting their bare flesh. Something about the movie is making my cheeks warm, though I know exactly what. Two men making out never fails to get me all hot and bothered, which is why I try avoiding any movies that I knew included shit like this. I’m such a freak. I need to take my jacket off, my body’s becoming increasingly warm. I look over at Jerry everytime I shift on the bed, hoping that he doesn’t catch a glimpse of my red face. I slowly slide my jacket off my body, my breath is increasing as the movie becomes more intense. I look over to see Jerry staring, a confused look on his face. 

“Bidibidibidi, you okay Buck?”

Jerry asks me, seeming more weirded out than concerned. 

“Yeah I’m alright. Something wrong with my face?”

“You look like you’re watching a porno, Pete.”

I feel nervous, I think I know what he’s getting at. 

“You tryna say I’m some fag Jer? You think I’m gay cuz I’m a little sweaty, really?”

I ask him in a viscous tone, daring him to agree. I don’t even like telling myself that I’m gay, cause I’m not. Why the hell would I want Jerry knowing that I’m into boys? 

“Well…”

He pauses. I watch him contemplate my question. As the minutes go by I become less worried. Obviously he knows I’m straight, he sees all the hot chick magazenies and final girl moves that I watch daily. He hears me talk about my need for women like water. Jerry knows me as an absolute sleaze, there’s know way he’ll ever think for a second that I’m gay.

“Pete, are you gay or something? You’re really defensive over this.”

I stare at him in surprise. Just as I was in the middle of convincing myself that he would never know, he fucking asks me if I am.

“What do you think?”

“I think that you should ask yourself that Buck”

“Fuck you mean aks myself? I would know if I was gay or not!”

“Well if you’re so sure about that, you tell me. Are you gay Pete?”

“That’s obvious. Why would I be gay?”

“Answer the question.”

“I don’t need to Jer, you know the answer!”

“So you are?”

“Shut up and be serious!”

“I am being serious Pete! Clearly you’re tryna hide something if you won’t answer me!”

“Well fuck you Jerry!”

I huff and fall silent, my heart beating heavily. I could feel his eyes on me, ones that know something that I’ve been trying so desperately to disprove. I’m not gay, that shits for fags and wimps. Why the hell does Jerry think I’m gay anyways?

“Yo Jer.”

“Huh?”

“Why do you think I like boys anyways?”

He’s quiet again, but only for a couple seconds

“I mean, just look at how you act around dudes. You always put your hands on them, you always say you’d rather gets compliments from other men, you always talk about how nice and handsome those guys look in your weird pornos, you told Bill that you’d rather kiss a dude before a girl, you said that a date with a guy sounds so much better than any whore out there. Why wouldn’t you be gay?”

“Okay, well. That shit just sounds gay out of context Jer, I’m confident in my masculinity. And plus, I’d fuck a girl anyday man. I love their bodies and their sas and their boobs n shit. No gay man wants to fuck a girl.”

“No straight man wants to kiss a dude!”

“I ain’t gay!”

“Yes you are! Any time we talk about love and romance you always say that doing that shit with guys sounds better! That’s love Pete! Sure you wanna fuck a girl, but you would only love on a dude!”

I let Jerry rant, thinking about his words carefully. He’s right. I’d rather love on a dude than a girl. And the more I think about it, I really wouldn’t mind banging one too. I mean, I guess I’ve always known I was a fag but that doesn’t mean I have to accept it.

“Jerry.”

He stops talking, noticing my serious face.

“Jerry, you’re right, okay. I’m gay. I like boys n shit.”

He stares at me blankly, blinking a couple of times. No shocked face, no disgusted look either. Just a face full of nothing.

“Um, yeah. I could tell.”

That’s it?

“But how? I did everything I was supposed to. I don’t even act like one of those freaks.”

“Well, I didn’t suspect anything until tonight. When you got all angry and defensive about me calling your movie gay it all made sense to me. You remind me of myself, Pete.”

Hold the fuck up what does he mean by me reminding me of himself? The last person I’m like is Jer bear over here.

“What the fuck does that mean?”

Seriously, what does that mean? I’m asking him how he knew I was gay based off of tonight, and suddenly he’s comparing us?

“I had the same reactions to being called gay back in middle school too. I got all defensive and angry despite all the evidence being there…”

“What are you trying to say Jer? You some kinda fag?”

“Yes, I am. I’m gay Pete. I like boys. Understand what I mean now?”

I just stare at Jerry, taken aback. I mean, this fantasy freak is gay as hell, but I didn’t think he actually likes boys. Furthermore, he’s over here trying to connect with me on some emotional level? I’m weirded out man. But I mean at the same time I feel oddly comforted? Like there’s no way this fag would rat me out to the guys. I’m looking at him looking at me. His eyes are squinted like always, he;s leaning forward real close to me, and his lips. Man. His lips look real enticing. And his skin looks really soft. And his hair looks strangely soft right now. And before I can stop myself I speak.

“Can I kiss you?”

What the fuck? Just because I’m gay doesn’t mean I’m into that gay shit.

“Uh well, sure. That’s fine with me.”

Jerry sounds all nervous. Just as nervous as me. But that doesn’t throw me off, it only makes the idea more appealing. I don’t want to kiss him. God I need his lips on mine. Do I even want to kiss him that badly? I’m not a freak there’s no way I do, I don’t even want to kiss chicks this badly. Man do I want him right now. I lean in close to Jerry and allow myself to do this gay shit just once. We start out slow. Our lips are moving against each other, then my hands reach his shoulders for better grip. I’m on top of him as we make out, the kiss intensifying as Jerry’s arms wrap around me. I’m engulfed by all that is him. His smell, his taste, his touch, his breath. All I could ever want can be found in this moment. It’s nothing I’ve ever felt before, a bliss that makes my heart ache with happiness. I think Jerry was right with what he was saying. I could easily fuck a chick, but by God can I love a man. After what feels like hours we break the kiss. We’re both breathing heavily as we hold each other. I stare at Jerry’s face, his pupils blown out like he just smoked the purest of crack. He gave me a sheepish grin, forcing me to smile back. I’ve never felt more elated in my life. 

Slowly, I get off of him as the high I felt begins to wear off. I sit next to Jerry in silence, letting his hand encapsulate mine. I kissed another man and it was amazing. I’ve never felt this good in my life. God that was better than expected. Holy shit I’m a freak. I just made out with a faggot. I quickly pull my hand back and stand up. I’m pissed. Who the hell does Jerry think he is?

“This was all part of your plan you fag!”

“What? Pete, what are you talking about?”

“You’re gay ass had a crush on me and convinced me that I was gay so I’d do some freak shit like that! You asshole!”

“What? No! You kissed me because you wa-”

“No you fucking manipulated me! All that shit you said made me gay aint even gay! You’re trying to cover it all up but I know you’re plans you faggot!”

“Pete please! Yo-”

“I don’t wanna hear a fucking word from you gay boy! Get the fuck out of my house before I beat the shit out of you!”

Jerry quickly does as he’s told and packs up his things. He darts out of my room and leaves my house entirely as I’m left here to sit in silence. I know it wasn’t Jerry’s fault that I kissed him. It was all on me, which is obvious. Just because I’m gay doesn’t mean that other people gotta know that too. Maybe I’ll just stick to the chicks, it’s close enough to love anyways.

End post.

[onceonafullmoon]

Convos With Rin

Rin x Gn! Reader

No warnings! Just pure fluff, also you can ignore the last 2 lines if you want to read this as platonic!

Aka: maladaptive daydreams by yours truly that I cleaned up and formatted. Part 2 here

“Sometimes I wonder if the idealized, romanticized version of relationships I’ve built up in my head are subconsciously affecting my navigation in reality.”

“What?” Rin asks, rolling over from where he lies on his bed to look at you, his teal eyes switching from his phone to glance over at you.

“Sorry, that was word vomit.” You say waving a hand dismissively before speaking again. “It’s just… I mean that I wonder if my expectations of romantic relationships have been distorted because of all the media I consume. And I wonder if that would ruin any chance I have of a healthy relationship.”

You absentmindedly start fiddling with your fingers as you speak.

“Like, for example dating sims, every love interest is over possessive and jealous, and that’s fine, cause it’s a fantasy. And obviously it’s not endorsed in real life, because if you date someone who foams at the mouth every time you look at another man, you’ll have issues. But… sometimes I wonder if I’ll think back to those dumb games when I’m in a relationship and choose something unhealthy for myself.”

A comfortable silence lapses after your ramblings and you wait patiently for your best friend's response.

“…you sure do think a lot more than I expected.” He says after a while and you can’t help but roll your eyes.

“Wow thanks.” You drone out. “You know what? I’d rather you have just flipped me off and called me a dumbass than whatever attempt of a compliment that was.”

“Didn’t mean it like that, I meant that I’d never once thought about that.” He says cooly, in a way that makes you unfairly jealous of his demeanor.

“Yeah? Well, I’m not surprised. Your brain is composed of 50% football and the other half is basic motor skills. I doubt you’ve even thought of anything outside of that.”

“…not true.”

“Oh yeah, you’re right. Somewhere, squeezed between the cracks of those key areas, is your vast knowledge of horror trivia.” You joke, your eyes darting over his sprawled form.

“…” He hesitates to respond before muttering out. “That’s not what I meant.”

“What’d you mean then?”

“…nothing, never mind.”

“Oh boo, you whore.” You scoff, sitting up in his desk chair to devote your attention to him. “Come on tell meeee! I tell you everything… well, almost everything but— nonetheless…”

He glares but you simply smile at him before waiting eagerly for him to finally loosen his tongue and spill whatever he has locked away from you.

And maybe deep down he knows that there’s no winning against you because he ends up opening his mouth to speak.

“I…I think about romance sometimes.” He eventually admits, his eyes darting back to his phone in embarrassment.

“Oho?” You straighten up further, a goading grin on your face much to his annoyance. “Our little Rinrin is growing up!”

“Fuck you, this is why I don’t tell you shit.”

“Aww come on, I won’t tease you anymore I promise! Please tell me more!” You practically beg, looking at him with prying eyes.

“This is lame.” Rin scoffs.

“You’re lame! Romance is perfectly natural. Anyways, is this a crush? A passing fantasy?”

“Why do you care so much?”

“I live vicariously through my friends’ love lives, now spillll!” You say, dragging out the last syllable deliberately to piss him off.

“I’m not having this conversation with you.”

“Why not?” You say a pout on your lips.

“Because you’re annoying and you’re only asking to make fun of me.”

“What? Me?” You gasp out in faux surprise. “Never, could I ever make fun of you, after all you’re my dearest most important–”

“Save it.” He cuts you off, content to ignore you now, engrossed in his phone.

“Kill joy… I’ll get it out of you one of these days.” You say darkly before leaning back to sulk in his chair.

“Over my dead body.” He mutters, but if you looked over to him again, you’d see the tell tale way his gaze fell back to you.

Unfortunately for you, Rin’s crush would stay a secret for just a little while longer.

[tachiharastanacc]

“Traitor! I’ll never forgive you for this!”

He could hardly believe that he was the one speaking the words, spitting them at the people he considered some of his closest friends. The man he considered a kind of father.

It was him that should be screamed at. That should be cursed out. He was in no place to accuse anyone of anything.

And yet.

“I trusted you! How could you do this to me?!”

The traitorous old bastard in question didn’t move, staring at him with a pitied gaze.

“Michizou-“

“Don’t fucking talk to me!”

“Can we wrap this up? I have an appointment to annoy Kunikida after this, and I can’t miss it.”

And then there was the damn detective. A far cry from the Port Mafia executive that he used to hear reports about, the obnoxious fucker had walked up behind him and cheerily cuffed their hands together.

If Tachihara hadn’t grown up around Jouno, he might’ve been impressed.

“Tachihara, it’s not that we want to hurt you or anything…”

Higuchi, in her ever-sensitive state was standing behind Hirotsu, holding onto the arm of a mildly annoyed Akutagawa. At least, that was how he wanted to come off.

Tachihara could practically smell the disappointment coming off him in waves.

“No. You just wanna get rid of me! This is revenge for betraying you!”

He considered lunging at them, but he doubted they’d fall for the bluff. And at the end of the day, he knew he wouldn’t actually hurt them.

Plus, he was dragging around about 67kg of dead weight.

“We don’t want to get rid of you. You know that.”

Hirtosu continued speaking in that same antagonizing tone of voice. As if Tachihara were some cornered animal he were trying to soothe. Or worse, a child throwing a temper tantrum.

“Do I?! Cuz you’re the ones who fucking ambushed me!”

It was supposed to be a simple picnic. That was all he wanted. The only request he’d made.

‘Before I die, I wanna do something. As a family.’

It’d been an embarrassing thought. And even more embarrassing to say. But after everything that had happened, spending his last two days with the them seemed like bliss.

“Tachihara.”

Gin’s voice was soft as always. Gentle in ways that the others couldn’t even fathom being. He’d refused to look at her, and he wasn’t planning on starting now. She of all people should know how he felt.

It was her that he’d told first.

‘Yeah. The Hunting Dogs are fucked like that. But hey, I wouldn’t trade this for the world. I’d rather die in a couple days than spend a life away from all of you.’

Gin hadn’t said anything at first. Just quietly ran her fingers through his hair as he talked.

The next day, the boss called him up.

He’d essentially taken one glance at the shadowed corner of his office and vehemently declared it was Tachihara’s choice and he wasn’t going to get involved.

Tachihara, meanwhile, had made his position very clear when he’d pulled a sword on his own commander.

And yet.

“Fool. To think you’d throw away your future for a bunch of lowlives.”

Tachihara gracefully didn’t mention the fact that Akutagawa had done the same thing for a man he claimed to hate not even a month prior.

“You’re one to fucking say shit! You spent years pining after praise from a man who tries to kill himself every other day.”

He turned to the bandaged man essentially holding hands with him.

“No offense.”

“None taken! Though, if you wanted to commit a double suicide, all you had to do was ask~”

“Is that some kinda joke to you?! My brother killed himself ya know! It’s not fucking funny!”

He paused.

“And I ain’t suicidal either!”

“Maybe not, but you don’t really value your own life~”

“Keep talking to me like that and I’ll grant your last wish and end you myself!”

“Enough. Both of you.”

Hirtosu, as always, was the voice of reason.

It was frustrating though, having the old man treat them like squabbling children. Even if they were. In a way.

And even if Dazai was right. In a way.

“It’s not…that I dislike bein’ alive or something. I just…”

He was a hunting dog. He’d been trained to always fight for justice. He was a weapon to be wielded. A soldier to be ordered around. A dog sent to catch its prey, no matter the cost of the hunt.

That was who he was. Who he was designed to be.

That was why he had tried to slit his throat without hesitation, if it meant not being turned against the world.

“Tachihara…”

Higuchi was still behind the others, but she took a step forward as she spoke. Her eyes were wet with unshed tears. Great.

“Nee-san, I didn’t mean…”

Curse the damn detective. No wonder Chuuya couldn’t stand him.

Thought to be honest, his instincts as a spy told him otherwise.

“That’s not the damn point! The point is that you ignored what I wanted! You lied to me and said we could spend today together! Why is that so hard to understand?! That I wanna spend the day with the…with the only family I got left.”

Higuchi turned away from him, but he could hear the sob she muffled behind her hand. Even Hirtosu, usually so calm, so stoic was looking at him with something akin to-

“Don’t ya dare pity me, gramps! I don’t need that! Not from you!”

If nothing else, he didn’t bother denying it. Tachihara had already seen the glint in his eyes. If he didn’t know better, he’d think he was about to start crying.

But he’d known the man for years. It wouldn’t make sense. Not for him.

The pity hurt. The fact that they didn’t see this as betraying him. They saw this as saving him. And it may have been the only way to save his life, but…

Images flashed through his mind.

A cheery young girl bragging about her latest successful torture method. One who, despite her constant joy derived from tormenting him, was always by his side. One who he viewed as a little sister.

A master of the blade whose accomplishments were only slightly less impressive than the food combinations he ate on a daily basis. A stoic pillar of support for the others.

A man who teased him, but was always the first to support him. Who could break the toughest of men and then come back and treat him just like a little brother.

The one who’d raised them. Who’d turned them into what they were.

The mafia was his family, but so were they.

And without them…

“I’m not goin’ back! You can’t make me!”

That wasn’t a threat or a challenge or anything. It was just true. Even they couldn’t manage to drag him all the way back to a top-secret military base. Not without abilities. Which they wouldn’t be able to use while Dazai was touching him.

And they all knew that the second he let go, Tachihara would be off like one of his bullets.

“That’s where you’re wrong, I’m afraid.”

That voice was one he’d only heard a few times. They’d never been particularly close. More of a distant, mutual respect for one another.

Which made sense, with the two of them being the only successful spies that infiltrated the mafia and survived.

“What? So you’re in on this too?! I guess that’s not shocking, considering your track record,” Tachihara spat.

The black-haired man stepped forward, adjusting his circular glasses.

“That’s enough. It’s time to go home.”

Agent Sakaguchi’s expression was schooled, neutral. Near unreadable, if not for Michizou’s prior knowledge of the man’s training and history.

Despite the faint regret, Tachihara knew better than to reason with him. While the Black Lizard only wanted to help him, Sakaguchi was just doing his job. There was nothing to be said that would persuade him.

“I thought this was my home.”

“The mafia isn’t a home.”

Though his words were harsh, the teenager knew that he was convincing himself more than anyone else. He may have had no loyalty to the Port Mafia anymore, but everyone with connections to his division knew that he took the same day off every year and came back smelling of whisky, curry, and flowers.

It wasn’t hard for a trained spy to connect the dots. Or even an untrained spy, if gossips were to be believed.

Tachihara understood though. He too wished things could’ve been different. But unlike Ango, he really believed he’d found his place.

Dazai threw his arms around him just as the man snapped his fingers. Though his reflexes were far beyond average thanks to the surgeries, even if his were lighter, the exhaustion of his body shutting down and being pushed passed its deadline slowed him down considerably.

He barely had time to react before he felt a sharp prick in his neck.

“Heyyyy Ango~! Do you think this stuff would kill me if I got injected with it?”

The parking lot was spinning, but the excitement in the detective’s voice was loud and clear.

“Absolutely, so don’t even try it. The Hunting Dogs are resistant to most poisons and drugs, so we need an extra strong dose. That’s enough to kill 30 men.”

“Aw, and you didn’t save any for me?”

Jeez, he didn’t have to sound so damn disappointed.

From beyond the haze of blacks and grays, Higuchi’s blonde head approached him.

Tachihara swayed a bit on his feet, allowing the deceptively-strong twig of a man still clinging to him to support his weight fully.

“Nee-san…”

He felt like he was speaking underwater. His limbs felt like jelly.

He’d had surgery over 70 times. He’d been under anesthesia a lot. But this was different. This felt like the world itself was fighting against him, trying to drag him down to hell with the rest of his missing unit.

“Shhh, I’m here. It’s okay. You’re okay.”

He closed his eyes, nodding slowly as cold hands came to rest upon his cheeks. “You’re not alone. We’re all here with you.”

He was faintly aware of the heavy hand on his shoulder. The stench of cigarettes easily overwhelmed him.

Gross.

“Hey…you should really…take better care of your lungs. You’re already…practically…a fossil.”

He yawned. He was so, so tired all of a sudden.

The old man in question gave him a sad chuckle before patting his head affectionately.

Tachihara may have been a mafioso, but he never was a fan of Gramps smoking. If nothing else, the lecture Jouno would give him when he came back to the base smelling of nicotine was bad enough.

Still, he allowed them to wrap around him.

He couldn’t quite remember why they were so worried, but he knew they were upset.

“Why…ya sound so…sad?”

“Shut up,” Akutagawa’s voice echoed over the ringing in his ears.

Tachihara Michizou was never one to refuse a direct order.

Except…

Ah, it was all too hazy.

“Think ‘m…gonna sleep…now…”

Words continued to be said, but he didn’t process any of them. Even Gin’s soft voice, whispering in his ear.

“I…ve…ou.”

—

Hirtosu didn’t know how long he’d been standing there.

His cigarette tasted bitter in his mouth. The sounds of the engines and Higuchi’s wails had all but faded now.

“It’s a shame.”

He had nothing to say beyond that. It wasn’t that he didn’t care. Far from it. It was just that despite his enjoyment of reminiscing, he didn’t want to think about this any more than he had already.

Perhaps once he, Chuuya, and Kajii were all a few beers deep.

The elderly mafioso took another drag of his cigarette.

“I wonder if I’ve made a mistake.”

It wasn’t a question he wanted to reflect on particularly. But his audience wouldn’t show itself until he invited conversation.

“You already know where I stand.”

The executive didn’t bother emerging from the shadows. He didn’t have to. The fact that he’d left his office was tell enough that he was invested.

“…I couldn’t let him die.”

“That doesn’t mean you let him live.”

“I know.”

Another breath. Another cloud of smoke.

“This isn’t over. Things won’t end like this.”

Hirtosu didn’t respond for a moment. Then, with a small smile, he spoke.

“You sound like you’re agreeing to help.”

“No. I’m not. However…I’ll see what information I can find. I have resources.”

As one should expect of perhaps the greatest assassin of all time.

“Why? I’d half expected you to wipe your hands of this.”

“I did too. Those soldiers…they may not be like my brother and I. But we’re the same in some ways.”

The man in the shadows smiled softly.

“Someone once saved me, despite how I betrayed him. He’s the reason I’m still here, though he is not. So, I’ll find what information I can.”

The man turned to leave.

“Perhaps one day, I can make up for everything I’ve done. Right, Arthur?”

[arc-misadventures]

While on a patrol with Jessica (green lantern), Diana (wonder woman) and Karen Starr (power girl), Jaune is asked by Diana what FMK (or SMB) means

Jaune: MFK VII

Whilst on patrol about the city of, Vale, a quartet of Hunter’s a really, really bored. So in the hope to alleviate their collective boredom one among them decides to ask a rather leading question.

~~~

Diana: Bored…

Jaune: So bored…

Kara: He board, she board, they all board.

Jessica: All aboard…

Jaune: I was gonna say that!

DJK: Hehehe!

Kara: But, seriously this is so boring!

Diana: I know! I kinda want to have a, Grimm attack me just to elevate this boredom…

Jessica: I haven’t seen a single, Grimm all day.

Jaune: Consider that a good thing, means there’s no, Grimm around, and people are less likely going to be attacked by them.

Kara: But, it’s so boring!

Diana: The best battle there is, is the battle you do not need to fight.

Jaune: Agreed. People will be at ease if we told them there are no, Grimm around, then that there are, Grimm about.

Jessica: Well can we at least find something to do! We’ve been walking around this forest for hours! I’m sooo bored!

Jaune: Well, maybe one of you can think of something to do then.

Kara: Okay… Oh, here’s an idea! Hey, Jaune~?

Jaune: I just felt a chill…

Kara: Oh don’t be so paranoid, Jaune. I just want to know something.

Jaune: That being?

Kara: Between the three of us; Me, Jessica, and Diana, who would you, MFK?

Jaune: What?! I’m not answering that!

Kara: Oh yes you are~!

Jaune: No I’m not! W-Why do you want me to answer that?

Kara: I’m curious; I mean you’re quite a handsome guy…

Jaune: You think I’m handsome?

Kara: And, we’re a duo of smoking hot babes, and one absolutely adorable little girl…

Jessica: Hey!

Kara: One can’t help, but wonder if you could, MFK one of us who would be what, and why?

Jaune: Do you guy’s serious want to know that?

Diana: I have to admit, I’ve always been a little curious on who you would date among the three of us.

Jaune: Seriously?

Diana: Seriously. I’ve heard plenty of couples have been made between team members. So that being said, who would you like to date among the three of us?

Jaune: What? That’s … I…?! Jessica! Please tell me you’re not thinking the same thing as well.

Jessica: W-Well… I-I’m a little curious myself really…

Jaune: Oh… Well, I’m not going to tell you anything!

Diana: Oh really~?

Diana pulls out her her golden lasso, The Lasso of Truth before snapping it between her hands as she smiled smugly at him.

Jaune: …

Jaune: You have serious trust issues…

Diana: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Jaune: She’s used that lasso on some cheating ex hasn’t she?

Kara: I’ve seen her do it. Man that was something… That lady was…

Jaune: Crazy?

Kara: I would say, psychotic.

Jaune: Yeash… Okay fine I’ll do it… But, I’m afraid I’ll have to kill you, Kara.

Kara: What?! Why are you going to kill me, a smoking hot blonde babe?!

Jessica: You said that with such ease. Do you hate, Karen, or something?

Diana: Are you gonna tell us why, or do I have to hogtie you?

Jaune: Don’t even think about it princess. Here, take a look at this.

Jaune pulled out his scroll before handing it over to, Kara who’s eyes shot out wide in shock, before showing the others.

Jessica: Is this your family?

Jaune: Yep.

Diana: You have seven sisters?

Jaune: Technically eight, one of them is married so, eight sisters.

Kara: And, I look like seven of them?

Jaune: Yeah, pretty much.

Kara: Yeah, I can see why you would, ‘kill’ me. But, Jaune think of all the fun we could have if you didn’t~!

Jaune: If I had a bucket of ice water I’d douce you in it.

Kara: Spoil sport.

Jaune: Okay, I would then fuck you, Diana.

Diana: Oh really?

Jaune: The growing sexual tension between us is eventually going to boil over, and we’re just gonna go at it one day.

Diana: Bet it will be fun if it does~!

Kara: Sexual tension; What sexual tension?

Jaune: Oh we’ve been butting heads ever since we were partnered together, it’s only gotten worse since I was made team leader, and she wasn’t. Because she’s always trying to be the leader, when she isn’t. And, she wouldn’t do a good job at that.

Diana: Like you are a good leader; You can barely stand in a fight against me, how do you think you do against an actual, Grimm?

Jaune: Okay, you’re a superhuman, with super strength, invulnerability, and you can fly, these are things that, Kara also has. And, Jessica also has her magical green ring thingy that makes it so she can also fly, and make what ever she wants. And, I’m just a guy with a sword, and shield. And, I’m the leader of this band of misfits, says a lot about why I was made team leader.

Diana: Such as?

Jaune: That they wanted brain not brawn to lead the team you muscle head.

Diana: Another word out of you, and I’ll put you in your place…!

Kara: Ya, on top of, Diana!

JDJ: WHAT?!

Diana: Are you saying I’m a bottom?!

KJ: Yes.

Diana: That’s bullshit! I am totally a bottom!

JKJ: …

Diana: D-Did I say, ‘bottom?’

Jessica: Yes…

Diana: Well that’s not true, what I meant to say is that I would totally bottom for, Jaune!

Diana: …

Diana: I did not mean to say that! I’d meant to say, I’d bottom for, Jaune! Zeus ass?! Why did I say that?!

Jessica: Uhh… Diana… y-you’re holding the lasso in your hand.

Diana looked down, and saw the glowing golden light of the, ‘Lasso of Truth’ indicating that she was indeed, telling the truth.

Diana: …

Diana: Hera give me strength…

Kara: Does this happen often?

Diana: It happens…

Jaune: So… are we going to talk about this, or…?

Diana: No, no we will not.

Jaune: Okay then. So, after a great deal of deliberation, I shall marry, Jessica.

Jessica: YES!

Jaune: Yes, what?

Jessica: Yes, I will marry you!

Kara: Uhh… Jessy… You’re not actually getting married, you know that right?

Jessica: W-We’re not…?

Kara: No, no you’re not.

Jessica: Nawww man… But, I wanna marry the sexy blonde adonis…

Jaune: …

Jaune: Okay, this has been a fascinating endeavour that I shall immediately start mentally repressing, let’s move on!

Diana: Yes, let’s move on!

Jessica: Yes, lets!

Kara: But, Jaune, if I didn’t remind you of your sisters, would you do me!

Jaune: Oh, I’d totally bang you against a tree right now if they weren’t here.

Jessica: WHAT?!

Kara: Oh, really~?

Jaune: …

Jaune: Diana…

Diana: Yes~?

Jaune: You ever wrap your lasso around me again, I’ll show you what I learned in the boy scouts. Okay?

Diana: Noted.

Jaune: Okay, lets go. There’s, Grimm to kill, and if I can’t find one, I’ll kill, Kara first.

Kara: Excuse me, what?!

[joe-spookyy]

saw traps in order and whether or not i would survive them

saw iii

classroom trap - jesus fuck. i think i might just die here. like. i probably Could. but i don’t know if i would even have the willpower? like i feel like i would rather just explode. survivability 2/10.

angel trap - yeah i’m getting out of here. i’m no bitch, and i would dunk my hand in that jar real quick and speedy like, and then get right to work on the lock. i could hype myself up real quick, and honestly, i feel confident that i could shake off the acid and not even cause that much damage to my hand. survivability 9/10.

shotgun collar - i am not a doctor. so this is a little iffy. but i honestly feel like i might actually be able to pull this off without getting shot by that thing. i will manually make his heart beat beat. i’ll give that nasty old man mouth to mouth for as long as i have to, and then i’ll brush my teeth for seventeen minutes straight to get the taste out. i also think i could do a good enough diy lobotomy that the pressure on his brain would let up at least a little. i think with that he would survive long enough for jeff to get through his traps, but if that’s looking iffy, i have a backup plan. i’m seducing amanda and i’m going to get her to let me out of the collar. we’re most certainly getting yuriful in there just for fun no matter what, so i might as well weaponize it. backup plan three i also think i could take the collar off without detonating it. cant be that hard. i have a small head. also, i’m not letting amanda shoot me at the end because again, she would be in love with me by now. all things considered, survivability 8/10.

jeff’s box - yeah i’m breaking out of here no problemo. does this even count as a trap? i don’t really care. survivability 10/10.

the freezer room - i’m wiggling out of those chains even if i have to dislocate my wrists. but also i think i would be able to convince jeff to let me out a lot quicker. i’m pretty tolerant to the cold, and also my beautiful nude body would be so attractive to jeff that he would forgive me for not stopping his son from dying and set me free. survivability 8/10. as jeff, there’s no real threat to me here. i’m saving her and getting out just fine. survivability 10/10.

the pig vat - WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK!!! OH MY GOD. this shit is fucking foul. i just heated up my grilled cheese and this is what you show me. i mean obviously jeff chose kindness and let him out eventually but jesus. i’d probably kill myself afterwards out of disgust. survivability 7/10 (considering the suicide probability) but i would never eat meat again. as jeff i’m letting him out way quicker, having a little bit of a hard time putting my hand in the goop, but ultimately escaping with both of our lives. survivability 10/10.

the rack - OW! OW! OW! jesus FUCK! they are not playing with these nasty ass traps! i would not survive this. what the fuck. my head and limbs are so getting ripped off. fuck my stupid life. 0/10 survivability. as jeff i’m fine. lickety spit i’m pulling the key off with my head far out of the way. 9/10 survivability (just in case i somehow fumble and get shot.)

eric matthews bathroom trap - yeah he seemed to have an easy enough time of it and i’m way smarter than him. it was clearly way easier than the initial bathroom trap. and i wouldn’t beat up amanda or be a cunt about all of it because i’m niceys, so therefore she wouldn’t kick my stump leg and leave me to die. 8/10 survivability.

jeff’s final test: i’m nice so i would not kill him and thus would not be trapped to die. i would leave and call the police so they would arrest him. i’m not stupid. survivability 10/10.

overall film survivability considering 9 traps (but 12 individual people’s chances when put through said traps) 7.5/10. nasty ass movie and nasty ass traps but i’m built different.

[shineonyoucrazyyandere]

I've finally managed to start reading Purple Haze Feedback recently and was hit with a flashback of how shitty Fugo was seen by some people in the fandom(at least people I was around at the time).

Like- yeah, it was kinda disappointing when he left the other instead of also going to go betray the boss, but shit I wouldn't wanna go either! He was still young and had a lot to live, i don't blame him for not wanting to go on a suicide mission!

Also, going in a more fanfic/yandere centered idea here, I always thought it would've been a lot funnier if more authors wrote the Reader also deciding not to join the gang to go defeat the boss instead of just following along

Bruno: We're going to betray the boos, so as soon as you enter this boat, you will be considered a traitor! I won't pressure or force any of you to do it, so enter at your own discretion!

Reader: Wow... that's a very difficult decision ...well, good luck to all of you!

Bruno: Yes ,thank- wait, you're not coming?

Reader, the moment they heard "betray the boss" leave Bruno's mouth:

*

Another idea that always comes to mind when talking about Fugo is the fact that at first, he was going to be a spy amd would betray the gang (If i remember it correctly).

I always thought it would be an interesting concept to have Reader working for Diavolo since the beginning (bonus points for angst if the gang ends up finding THAT out in the worst moment possible lol)

Reader, messaging Diavolo every few minutes to update him on the gang's behavior:

(Narancia probably just got stabbed by Fugo for the third time this week)

Note to self : be careful to not burn myself out on answering asks next time. Took the week off, just because I was that stuck. It’s good advice in general for anyone else that has a blog here 👍

It’s a rather tall order to ask some sixteen year old teenager to casually betray the whole mafia and specifically the most powerful man on top who they have never met before. I’d like to think Fugo was thinking over every unknown they weren’t guaranteed to find out. Let alone if they even had a chance to even fight at all. I never personally blamed the dude for peacing out personally.

So being Yandere I could absolutely see him do just about everything to get you to hesitate to go with Bruno and the others. He’d bend over backwards to do so, especially if you were hesitant yourself. Like sure there’s a chance you and the others by some miracle could defeat the boss, but depending on how he utilizes his organization and stand users against you, it would get ugly real quick. He even insists it’s just not worth getting hurt/killed over.

It’s likely his selfish desire to keep you to himself talking but he won’t back down in trying to keep you there with him. I always felt like Fugo could make a very compelling argument too, it’s almost scary how convincing he’d likely be. (That’s if you were unsure which way to go, if you didn’t want to go with Bruno and the others I’m certain it’d be much easier for him to take advantage of)

Spy! Reader with a Yandere Diavolo would be fantastic, almost scary in a horror sense. As you can easily doom the gang with your extra intel and knowledge with hanging out with all of them. Not to mention any calls or eventually bumping into Doppio would lead to some very interesting interactions. I can already hear the “dearest y/n” at some point once you succeed on sabotaging the Bucciarati gang.

[realuity]

an entirely biased review of all of the original killers in dead by daylight

okay so I don‘r play DBD. frankly, I’d rather shuck myself like a cob of corn than subject myself to whatever nonsense rhe game’s playerbase is up to. the lore’s not my thing and some of the character choices make me wrinkle. but I like horror things and I have a vague understanding of how they play. and I have some opinions. so i’ll throw them here.

thsi only includes the original guys made for the game. no liscensed visitors! (If you are wondering though I like myers and pig for their gimmicks and xenomorph because I love women)

evan macmillian - the trapper

i am excruciatingly neutral on this guy. he is kind of John Killer, which makes sense for how much I dgaf, but still. his mask is cool as fuck, but his lore really doesn’t resonate with me. trapping is a fun gimmick but apparently he lends himself to a lot of campy playstyles, which doesn’t sound too fun. he just exists to me.

philip ojomo - the wraith

this guy’s just really downright miserable. he doesn’t even wanna be here. he just wants to work at a Denny’s and live alone with a cat or whatever. invisibility is neat and the big stupid bell ring for whenever he does it is really funny though. cool guy I just feel bad for his existence

max thompson jr - the hillbilly

iunno this guys concept and lore just rub me the wrong way. just feels tone-deaf. much like wraith i think we should just leave this guy alone and let him farm in peace. he’s had a rough go of it. letting him be just some normal guy would make everything feel less. ew.

sally smithson - the nurse

how does she see out of that thing.

jokes aside she’s another i don’t feel strongly about. apparently she’s pretty meta due to her teleportation shenanigans, but otherwise she doesn’t catch my eye. I’m sorry women

lisa sherwood - the hag

really strong design-wise. really neat looking fungus plant lady. another one that really doesn’t wanna be here. like holy hell ma’am. maybe she and billy can go grill things together away from killing people for a big spider demon. otherwise I’m neutral on her too.

herman carter - the doctor

oh YEAH baby. this guy’s my MAN. he’s a complete SHITHEAD and is TERRIBLE and he’s very fun to watch. Electroshock Andy over here is the giggliest guy on campus and has some really funny builds and gimmicks and is also unreasonably complicated. jumpscare doctor is so fucking funny plus electricity themes are cool even if it is the endlessly fucked up existence of electroshock therapy and military-funded abuse, but what is horror without being a little slice of messed up reality? I never want to go near this man in my life.

anna - the huntress

I like her!! she’s pretty and fucked up. i like predator/prey motifs and she’s got a nice voice. my fav thing about her is the existence of orbital huntress. hilarious as hell. you can just cross-map bean someone with a hatchet to their skull. fuck yeah.

jeffrey hawk - the clown

he’s not even the cunty jester or joyous giggler kind of clown. he’s a freako with a thing for fingers that drugs people. i don’t want to be anywhere near this man in my life. fun short film though. damn good horror villian I just. ewwwwwwwwww

rin yamaoka - the spirit

she should be allowed to kill people actually. literally just some kid as far as I know. i’d be pissed off too if my dad got so fucked over by a company that he started killing people. living in the scary dimension and stabbing people sounds like a way better time than that. saw someone cosplay her once at a convention too and that was pretty neat.

the legion

genuinely wonderfully funny concept. these lot are just some kids that kill people as a hobby. they have a logo and listen to mixtapes while doing it and all. they’re spy mains that think they’re hot shit. the title is unreasonably cool for what they are. the fact they just have to like lie down and take a moment to go wheeze after using their ability is great too. they forgot to pack an inhaler or four to the scary dimension

adiris - the plague

frankly unreasonably badass design. ancient mesopotamian preiest that just like.vomits on people. i'm not too invested in whatever she's up to religion-wise i just think the fact she horfs up blood as a projectile weapon is sick as fuck. the censer as a melee is cool too

kazan yamaoka - the oni

this is the spirits great great peepaw or something aparently. i do love the aestehtic of traditional japanese masks i just wish the mask here had the big ol' eyes and bigger teeth. he hits people with a big club too i guess. neutral on this bloke.

caleb quinn - the deathslinger

IRELAND MENTION LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

otherwise this is a sick guy. old freak who got fucked over by capitalism so hard he decided to build a gu and shoot people with a harpoon about it. plus he's a cowboy. consideirng my biggest interest right now is great god grove, i am predisposed to liking cowboy motifs. also he's really funny in the 2v8 gameplay ive seen you literally just go fishing

talbot grimes - the blight

his main gameplay loop involves ramming into walls like an idiot before hitting someone with a big stick. i guess thats what the infection from hollow knight does to a guy. my only other strong opinion is that they shuould make his rushing running scream be the scotland forever voice clip

charlotte n' victor deshayes - the twins

can this game be normal about facial differences for two fucking seconds . anyway te concept is neat i guess and i like how kicking the infant is so tempting within this game that theres apparently entire meme playstyles based aroud baiting people into kicking the baby, thus getting them out of position for you to go hit them with your scythe

ji-woon hak - the trickster

shame that yet another title that couldve been used for a cunty jester has been taken. oh well. at least we have this guy who's pretty neat. a whole thing based on the k-pop industry is a rlly oddball choice for a horror game, but i dunno i've heard that said industry can get pretty fucked and exploitative. also i like neon colours a lot. the whole bit with him making his synths out of samples of his victims which he goes on to put into his work is really neat i think. hes kinda just some guy though

carmina mora - the artist

alright. her design is really neat and i like all the ink and strong red and black colours and her weird claw hand she turns her hand into. but she is possibly the funniest design slip-up ever. she's chilean and from chile and her major thematic throughline is crows. apparently, chile is like, one of the only countries to not have crows in it. lmao

the dredge

dredge!! dredge my friend dredge!! one of the three Creatures Buddies, dedge is like so fucking cute to me. thats a puppies dog. sure this puppies dog was formed from a dark fucked up ritual spawned from a jonestown situation and is the amalgam of hundreds of people stuck in a high-control cult enviornment, but consider that they're a puppies dog. i think if igave them a sugar cube things would be ok

tarhos korvács & the wacky bunch - the knight

i mean, cool ass concept of a murderous knight and his buddies all being played at once. i'm otherwise neutral. not really a medeival fan, but they're cool i suppose.

adriana imai - the skull merchant

alright she was definitley spawned from the result of a gaggle of designers throwing concepts at the wall and trying to shove them into a pile. a cut-throat millionare who kills ceos for fun, a comic book hero brought to life into a villian by the author's daughter, and a sci-fi high-tech conniving surveillance master murderer. i can respect that mish-mash design philosophy a lot but i'm otherwise also neutral. her little claw arm contraption thing is fun though

hux-a7-13 - the singularity

i really, really like hux! i'm a sucker for evil AI, especally one that's also getting into bioengineering and meaty mechanics. for a heartless killer who's hellbent on the kinda cliche goal of becoming the ultamite lifeform by assimilating others genetic info, he's actually kind of a smug snarky cunt. he calls people worms for no reason. he literally calls people annoying for screaming in pain. i think he and p03 would get along disastrously.

the unknown

one banger to the next. unknown here is a wriggly strange mass that's a love letter to creepypasta, urban legends, found footage and perhaps even the more recent development of analog horror. a squirmy fella who steals voices and fucks over anyone who comprehends them. doesn't even wanna be in the scary spider dimension if i recall correctly. i love the disjointed voicelines that come across as them mimicking whatever they've heard, but they're definitley like.. sapient. i think they have a dashing smile and a lovely crawl.

portia maye - the houndmaster

um. hi. hii hello ma'am. hellou. hi.

this is the newest addition, and she's a doozy. scotish pirate lady with a big ol' dog she loves very much. i don't know much about her.. but apparently her dog's breed is like, a notably loyal and strong one used as a guard dog/ and the lady herself? oh my god she's so fucking pretty. the gold and red on the coat. her badass knife cane. im quaking in my boots for a variety of reasons. i don't find her scary, don't find any of this lot traditionally scary, but yknow. she/s still sick as hell.

[whenmuldermetscully]

fic: He Who Believeth

Rating G *word rambling, iphone notes. A/N at the end*

It was all very routined. That’s what they all kept saying. Formality. Alright, I get it, yeah. Just a bunch of formality.

This man gave years of his life to be honored as a formality. Sure.

The wind is bitterly cold and the chill on the back of my neck makes my hair stand on edge. My bones ache - whether it’s from the cold or from being frozen stiff standing here - I’m tired.

I look at Scully’s face, pale and unmoving. Everything makes me feel sterile and that icy frost eats me from within. I’m fearful of making eye contact. Afraid to see her truth. She doesn’t know what to make of this any more than I do.

I’d missed the funeral and I’d asked her to come with me. She hesitated before agreeing with no less than a curt nod. I see the wear of my requests in the crease of her brow; I’ve asked more than my share of her and the few she’s asked of me, I fail to deliver.

Hear that? I disappoint her too. I missed the funeral, I’m selfish, I’m stubborn, I run head first into fire, jump off of buildings, damn near get myself killed countless times over. Reckless and sorry... And she, always running to my aid like a pathetic, undisciplined boy that I am, full of fanciful notions chasing ghosts in the sky. I’m a sore lot, aren’t I? Pitiful son. Pitiful son who missed the funeral.

Some example I am. I wasn’t what you wanted, was I? Rather, I'm not who you thought I'd grow up to be. I searched for the truth for us, for me, for my sister. How could any parent object to that? You should be proud of my unrelenting search for justice. God knows you gave me enough reason to rebel against you but here I am. You made your choices and so have I. I wanted better for us, isn’t that what you wanted too; why you did the things you did? You left mom with an impossible choice, pushing her to do things I can't even begin to --- no. No, I don't blame you. That's the truth. I don't regret what I'm doing and I think I can understand you the older I get. We all wanted the same thing: better.

And yet in all my searching, continuing what you started - all our joint sacrifices, I’m still…. Still.

I feel frozen, unable to move forward, paralyzed by so much unsaid, so much uncertainty. I just, I don’t know…I wish I knew—

���You ok?”

Her hand gently caresses my back. I feel the small heat radiating off her palm. Nurturing, healing hands. I squeeze my eyes tight to stave off threatening tears.

“Yeah. I’m alright.”

I feel her step up next to me. Please… don’t. Don’t make me look at you.

I can feel her intensity. Her energy just radiating off of her smothering me, blanketing me. I can’t be next to her or I’ll… I’ll—

“He.. He loved you very much.”

I stand there with my fist clenching and unclenching at my side. Scully doesn’t move. But I can feel her and I can’t carry the both of us. So it’s either I put my foot in my mouth or my fist through the wall.

“I uh…," I begin, like a coward with my head low and fists shoved in my pockets, “in my whole 34 years on this earth I uh…. Know I’ve made some questionable choices. Especially in these last few, he expressed over and over again that he wasn’t too keen on me following in his footsteps. But uh…”

Once the sting in my eyes began, there was no stopping the tears that started to fall. My voice betrays me, “I need to know… was he at all proud of me?”

Scully paused a long while, gazing at the headstone in front of them. Her facade slipping through her iron grip of trying to hold it together. Her lip trembled, and when she finally turned to look at me, with eyes so pained with grief that I felt my chest burst and my stomach drop. Her hand coming to grip my arm,

“Oh, William…. He was your father.”

The end. tagging @today-in-fic

A/N: I thought of like a world where future William comes back and is in M/S’s life and as an adult he decides to also pursue the truth. But Mulder is very against the idea because they already lost so much and now they’re a family so let’s enjoy what we have away from the darkness. And William just is so driven and he loves his sister and thinks she deserves a life with more answers than questions, so he does what he does, which puts a bit of tension on his relationship with Mulder. And Scully, can’t refuse her son so she’s always running to his aid. Both recognizing that Will is achieving what they couldn’t in a lot of ways, so they really can’t deny his quest, but also as parents they just fear for his life.

[lovetogether]

We’re gonna write a Dale “fan” “fic” . Be nice

The door inside the wall inside the door inside the wall inside the door inside the wall inside the door inside the. Hang on just a minute, I’m starting to think there’s more to this. An endless array of disappearances only for reappearance completely anew? It’s abnormal. I walk away from time with the stature of a man on his way to kill himself, I had the enthusiasm of a child. One of those, the kids you see in the park, yeah. About to set off on some imaginary adventure built upon false ideas of a world larger than oneself. I think I was scared, but I didn’t feel scared. I had to leave. The reality which I was faced in was not one I knew to be true but moreso aside my actual reality, I felt I needed to shift almost, to get back to what was my true life. I think I’ve always been hungry. There’s something terrible happening and I’ve known it’s been happening and I knew it would happen and I am doing nothing. I have to do something. I think existing as I am now is a disgrace to living itself but I’m happy to be alive. Things follow me and I know they’re following me and I knew they’d follow me and I’m doing everything. I think it’s two, four, five years since I last was, yet here I am. I’m on a course for direct collision, with what I don’t know, but I’ve always known since I was born. Something calls to me and I don’t know what it says but I know it tells me to keep going. I think I am perpetually on the brink of a life changing revelation. I’m very important. The world revolves around me. It always has, everything has always been this way. I don’t exist outside of others sight or acknowledgement. Touched or having been touched - I think of myself as violated yet comparable to packaging which is to say I am to be violated if you want what’s inside. I see in the corner of my eye an evil which is at the core of every organic thing and I must in my power work as hard as possible to snuff out this evil but I fear this evil is from within me. The world revolves around me, so everything started with me. I knew the minute things changed because I felt it and everybody can’t shake the feeling, “how do we go back?”. Like a portal of I were to walk into a door I’d see a hallways and at the end would be a man exiting the door on the opposite side. That man is me, as to look into the hallway I must exit the last room. I see myself in front of me like some twisted up idea of dissociation. I can call this me a clone but it is - for all intents and purposes - me. It’s always been me, it’s always been us. The idea of me is a collective of others, versions of me, or rather not me, existing in relation to me to make me. I am only one, but there’s more. He’s been missing for a long time - me - an idea of me - the lack-thereof, you name it, your words not mine. But I think they’re mine. I’m selfish but isnt selfishness just an anagram for selflessness? There’s no H nor I, me, myself, I don’t know. I often feel detached from the people around me because I cannot exist in context to others without some kind of plot. There is no casualness to my presence. Put the pieces together and you get me and me is just an idea which exists to fail. I only exist in context to her.

[gallifrey1sburning]

Musings on Another Life

“What’s up, spaceman?” Donna asked, setting a cup of tea in front of the Doctor where he sat at the wrought iron table in his back garden. He blinked, noticing for the first time that the sun was setting. It was odd that time could get away from him like that, now. An adjustment. So much of it was an adjustment, living like this. He’d thought that living linearly would make time feel so much more present, but it was the opposite, somehow. It ebbed and flowed and slipped away, like water.

“Oh, nothing,” he said, the answer still a reflex, before shaking his head. “No, sorry. Not nothing. A lot of things. I’ve been thinking about… a lot of things.”

Donna settled into the seat across from him, tapping her nails against the mug she’d kept for herself. “Care to share with the class?”

The Doctor took a slow sip of his tea—milky and sweet, just like he’d taken it the first time he’d worn a version of this face. He wondered if it was how the Other Him still took it. He swallowed. “I’ve been thinking about the Metacrisis,” he admitted.

“What about it?”

“Him,” the Doctor corrected. “The person. The Other Doctor. Well, the first Other-Doctor.”

“The part-human, you mean?”

“Yeah.”

“Right.” She studied him. “What about him, then?”

“I’ve always thought of him as a copy,” the Doctor admitted. “I told Rose that he was me, but… I don’t know that I really believed that. I thought of him as lesser. A facsimile of sorts. Oh, close enough for them to be happy together, sure, but not really me. But I…” he sighed and leaned back in his chair, setting his tea down. He scrubbed a hand through his hair. “I think I got it backward.”

Donna tilted her head to the side. “How d’you mean?”

“I think he was the real me, and I was what was left over.”

“Sorry, what?”

The Doctor met her puzzled gaze. “I don’t think it was a copy. I think it was a split.” When Donna just raised her eyebrows at him, he went on, “I mean, think about it. I was regenerating, but I didn’t want to, so I sent the energy into my old hand so that I could be what Rose wanted. And then I… I walked away into battle, and rather than being better now that she was back, I was worse. I was judgmental and cruel to my friends, and then to the Metacrisis, when all of you were doing the right thing. You were all doing what had to be done to save the multiverse, and I judged you for it. And then I… I just left them there. I abandoned Rose, the love of my lives, who I would have done anything to get back before then, whom I’d nearly killed myself over the loss of more than once, like what she wanted didn’t matter at all. I didn’t tell her I loved her, when it was all I’d thought of saying for years after I lost her. And then I became a monster. The Time Lord Victorious.”

Donna made a sound of protest, but he interrupted her. “No, I did. When I sacrificed myself to save your granddad? I’m sure he never said, even once we had you back and it was safe for you to remember, but I yelled at him. Called him a stupid old man who’d lived his life; told him, more or less, that my life was more important than his. That I was worth more than he was. Not in those exact words, but…” He shook his head. “And then I regenerated and I forgot. All of you, all of it. I went on like none of you had ever mattered. Barely thought of you. Never spoke of you. I was cold, disconnected. More alien than I’d been in centuries. I lost all of the lessons I’d learned in those past few bodies. Oh, sure, I came to love my new friends. Even River, in the end. But it was never the same. I was never the same. I think…” He wrapped his hands around his still-warm mug, letting the heat dispel the chill of the advancing evening. “I think that the parts of me that Rose healed went with her. I think that instead of staying the man she wanted, I became the man she wanted, and I saved the universe with you and then I told her I loved her and I gave her my forever. And I think that the person who stayed in this universe was what was left.”

“Oh, Doctor.” The Doctor felt Donna’s hand settle on his forearm. He blinked his eyes open. He couldn’t recall shutting them. The sky was darker now, and he could see stars shimmering into view in his peripheral vision. Donna’s eyes were damp in the reflected light shining through the sliding glass doors. He freed one hand from his mug and rested it over hers.

“It’s okay. It’s… I oddly feel more at peace with that than with the alternative. Is that weird?”

“Not really, I suppose. I mean, you wanted to give her everything, and you wanted to be with her more than anything. I can see how there would be peace in thinking that maybe you did, and you are.”

“But you don’t think it’s true?”

“I dunno. I wasn’t exactly there for the aftermath, was I? But I just saw you split in two in front of me not so long ago, and the next you clearly left a lot of his baggage behind—”

“Oi!”

“—so it wouldn’t be the strangest thing you’ve done even in the time I’ve known you, and it wouldn’t be terribly unbelievable, all things considered,” she finished, ignoring his protest.

He gave an aggrieved sigh. “I suppose that’s fair.”

“Do you think it’s true?”

The Doctor drummed his fingers against the back of her hand. “I don’t know, either. Considering that nothing I knew about myself or Gallifreyans or regeneration turned out to be true, it’s hard to say. It feels true. But it also feels like maybe I’ve finally grown it all back, in a way. Like maybe… maybe, after all those centuries, I’m finally me again.”

Donna smiled at him softly. “I think that’s all that matters then, don’t you?”

“Maybe so,” he agreed, smiling slightly back at her and squeezing her fingers. “Maybe so.”

On AO3

[your-alien-friend]

I don’t like that they killed Izzy, but I don’t think they did it for the wrong reasons like many others have said. But I also don’t blame them for feeling that way. Sure, the show is full of old, queer, kinky, disabled characters. But Izzy is the only one we get to see reckon with that in real time (besides maybe jim but that is done really quickly with minimal discomfort).

I’d argue he’s among the most important queer rep in the show because he does struggle with those things. Ofmd created a wonderful world where aside from little peaks of the outsiders views here and there, everyone is accepted. I love that and would not have the show any other way. It was so important for me to see people like me be treated as just… normal. But there does create a kind of dissonance with relating to those characters because we don’t live in that world.

That’s where I felt Izzys presence allowed them to excel in that respect. He let them paint a complete picture. Ed and stede remind me of my early teens, the discovery of an attraction that feels right in a way nothing else ever did, the sweetness of that first true love (along with the ups and downs of homoerotic friendships lmao). They’re the experience you have with another person. The crew of the revenge remind me of getting older and finding community, the safety and camaraderie and relief you get with that. They’re the experience you have with a community. But Izzy, he reminds me of myself through all these stages. He is all the self hatred, the misplaced aggression, the isolation. And then he gets to be the beauty, and acceptance, and levity that comes with truthfulness to who you are. He is the experience you have with yourself.

And that’s exactly why his death is so devastating. He was such a heavy lifter.

I think there’s also something to be said about Con O’Neil opening up about being a queer man himself and experiencing some of Izzy’s journey with him through the show, and perceiving him loosing that as well.

So yeah I think it’s a big loss that outweighs the narrative benefits. And I think we all have a right to mourn that. But I don’t think it’s fair to throw around all these baseless accusations at the creators. While there’s more nuance to why loosing Iz is such a big deal, this is undeniably not because of writers being against who he was. It’s the classic archetype for his character type, you sin, you make amends, you die. I do think maybe more input from queer writers could have prevented him not being fully appreciated outside of his ‘literary’ function, but that’s speculation.

I’m sad and angry too. But I’d rather focus on what we were given with Izzy and all the work Con O’Neil put in to fully flesh that out. Their story really is a monument to how community and fiction can change lives, and just how closely the two are intertwined.

And I’m grateful for what Izzy got to be. He could have easily been thrown away as the bad guy but instead he got to be so so much more. I’m glad we got to see that, even if his end wasn’t befitting of his journey.

Anyway rip Izzy Hands you were a real one and I’ll love you forever. Everyone else stop bullying David Jenkins I’m in your walls.

[elfboyeros]

Christmas Dinner

🚨Stories in this series contain suggestive/triggering themes [Abuse, Death, etc.]

Big Masterlist | Purus Sanguis Masterlist 

“Are you sure that it’s okay?”

Rudolph scoffs into his phone speaker, “It was my parents' idea,” he chuckles, “Adeline, don’t worry about it—”

“Christmas Dinner with your family, yeah, the most relaxing thing in the world.”

“Believe me, once you stop worrying about it, you will realize that none of us are going to eat you,” Rudolph jokes.

Adeline sighs, “I just don’t want to embarrass myself!”

“You won’t!” Rudolph reassures, “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”

“No! I wanted to come,” Adeline replies, “Besides, I’d rather not be at the Church.”

As she mentions, the Church made him think of her uncle, “Has your uncle—”

“Been a bitch?” Adeline interrupted, “Not lately. I don’t think he liked someone seeing him how he actually is.”

Rudolph tossed the butterfly knife he had been fiddling with onto his desk. “Has he ever hurt you?”

He could hear her sigh into the receiver, “Rudolph, I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

“I’m just worried about you.”

“I know,” Adeline mutters, “It’s not the best situation, but if I were in danger, I would tell you.”

There is something that is laced in Adeline’s tone that makes him not believe her, “Trust me, Rudolph,” she adds, noticing his short moment of silence.

“I trust you,” He mumbles, “I just wish you trusted me.”

“I told you I’d only trust you once,” she jokes, attempting to lighten the mood.

Rudolph hums, “I’d do anything to make you trust me again.”

“I doubt it will be that hard for you to do.”

The young vampire lets out a breathy chuckle while his cheeks turn red, “I’ll be there in maybe 30 minutes, ‘kay?”

“See ya soon, Rudolph.”

Rudolph leans back in his desk chair, tapping the side of his phone against his lips, thinking of what Adeline said about her uncle. “Someone seeing him how he actually is,” he mutters to himself, hearing his father’s heavy footsteps make it upstairs. “Dad!” the young man exclaims, exiting his bedroom and heading to his parents.

“Yes, schläger?” Wilhelm asks, redressing himself. A pile of clothes he was working on was piled on top of the cushion of a chair whilst he buttoned his new undershirt.

“What do you know about, Ion?”

Wilhelm rolls his eyes with a sigh, “He’s the priest of the Catholic church in town; he’s rather callous, extremely religious, and hates women. Why?”

“I’m trying to figure out how to get Adeline out of his house,” Rudolph answers very matter-factly.

 “You’re going to get yourself into trouble, son,” Wilhelm remarks, meeting Rudolph's unamazed gaze in the mirror he was standing in front of, “Because Adeline is an adult, she can freely move about the world as she pleases if she doesn’t want to leave that house, no one can force her to.”

“Yet, you killed Momma’s ex-husband—”

“Enough!” Wilhelm says sternly, “We’re not doing this, right now! You’re correct; nothing has or is happening to Adeline, but I am not bailing you out of jail nor representing you in court if you get into trouble. So don’t get yourself into trouble!”

Rudolph clicks his tongue, heading for the door. “What happened to the Wilhelm I was told stories about?”

“His priorities changed when he was given a family,” Wilhelm stated.

“Yeah? Well, give me a call when he decides to come back out,” Rudolph scoffs, leaving his father alone in his bedroom. “I’ll be back soon.”

He can hear his father sigh heavily before heading out of the house, getting in his car, and driving to pick Adeline up. She’s dressed up more than usual; she’s still in an oversized sweater that seems to swallow her whole, yet she is wearing makeup, its subtle, sage green eyeshadow, a nude lip, and light foundation to cover up her imperfections on the face. It’s a shame, Rudolph quite likes the moles on her face.

“You have three sisters, right?” Adeline asks as she gets into Rudolph’s car.

“I have two.” Rudolph chuckles,

“Why the hell did I think you had three?!” Adeline scoffs at herself while buckling her seatbelt.

“Well, technically I do have three,” Rudolph remarks, getting a confused look from his passenger, “There is me, Odette, Margo, and Aphrodite. My parents adopted Aphrodite before Margo and Odette were born. She doesn’t like being thought of as a Con Vester, so she isn’t.”

“Legally, she is your sister, but in reality, she isn’t?”

“Exactly,” Rudolph nods. “It is a little odd, but it's the way it has always been. She’s never been Aphrodite Con Vester, my sister, but Aphrodite Papadopoulos, our housekeeper.”

Adeline hums, “Okay, so there is you, Aphrodite, Margo, and Odette. Your niece, whom you always talk about. Your father, Wilhelm, and your mom… Bernadette?”

“Belladonna,” Rudolph corrects, “Oh, if you ever hear my dad call her Bela, don’t worry about it.”

“A nickname only he can say?” Adeline asks.

“Something like that.”

Taking her up the mountain, her eyes grow wide when she sees the Con Vester Manor come into view. The darkly muted large home with pointed arches, turret, roof gables, and dormers screams gothic, and this is most certainly where vampires live.

“Incredible!” Adeline gasps, exiting Rudolph’s car.

Rudolph smiles at Adeline’s excited gaze at her surroundings as she enters the home, leading her to the living room, where everyone but Aphrodite is present. He places a hand on the side of her shoulder before lowering himself to ear level.

“On the floor, is my sister Odette, her daughter Violetta, and her step-daughter Noveletta, Rudolph mentions as Adeline looks at the three on the floor in front of the couches, “That’s my mother trying to teach, Bram home to dance, also Odette’s step-son.”

“You look a lot like your mom.” Adeline comments softly, observing Belladonna and the young blonde-haired dhampir struggling to follow his grandmother’s instructions.

“I get that a lot,” He mumbles. “Margo and her girlfriend Hydrangea are in the sunroom,” Rudolph gestures to the small room off of the living room, made of almost all glass and full of plants, where his sister stood by the door, and a blue-haired woman in a lounge chair, “And those two in the corner are my father and Odette’s Husband, Hendrick.” He adds, pointing to his father and brother-in-law standing over a small table and discussing something. Oddly enough, Hendrick looks familiar with his dark hair and pale skin.

“Is that Hendrick Valentine?” Adeline asks quietly.

“Yeah, why—”

“Your sister is married to the Hendrick Valentine, Abraham Moses, and the fucking director of The Great Image!” Adeline whispers, yells.

“So, you like his movies?”

“Like his movies? He’s one of my favorite directors! I ask about your family constantly, and you fail to mention that you are related to one of the best directors of the past 10 years!”

“In my defense---”

“Rudolph?!” Bram exclaims with a smile.

“Duckie?” Belladonna questions, turning away from Bram and meeting the eyes of Rudolph and Adeline. “You must be Adeline!”

“Yes, ma’am—” Adeline mutters before Belladonna swiftly approaches her and takes her hands.

“There is no ma’am in this home,” Belladonna states, with stars in her eyes, “My name is Belladonna.”

“N-nice to meet you, Mrs. Belladonna.”

“It’s nice to see you under better circumstances, Adeline,” Wilhelm comments.

“Thank you for letting me into your home, sir. It’s very beautiful,” she replies.

“What were we going to do?” Odette notes, “Leave Rudolph’s girlfriend out of family festivities? No, Momma and Daddy won’t allow that.”

“Girl…friend…” Adeline burbles, eyes wide with a distant gaze, her cheeks getting hot

“Odette!” Rudolph exclaims, his face now bright red.

Odette began to laugh loudly, “You know good and damn well she is just my friend, why the hell are you like this!” Rudolph barks as his sister continues to tease him.

“Stop bickering,” Wilhelm sighs.

“Because that’s totally going to make them stop,” Margo mutters, reentering the living room from the sunroom. “It’s nice to meet Adeline, sorry we’re so loud.”

Adeline let’s out a laugh, “No worries.”

It feels warm. The loving and familial atmosphere is where everyone enjoys one another’s company and is comfortable enough to speak their mind and joke around. It feels like home, but that’s not something Adeline wants to admit out loud.

Dinner is a lovely spread, catering to everyone’s taste. Everyone at the large dining table was talking back and forth; even Aphrodite was forced to sit down.

“Hydrangea, are you off for Christmas?” Wilhelm asks.

“I should be, unless something horrible happens, I think I got New Year's off too,” Hydrangea answers.

“What do you do?” Adeline asks.

“I’m a nurse.”

“Are you going to go home for the holiday?” Wilhelm questions.

“Nah, the last place I wanna be at the end of the year is New York.”

“Ginette is more than welcome to come and stay here for the holidays if she likes,” Belladonna mentions.

“She’s having a fun time with her girls' group traveling the West Coast right now,” Hydrangea comments, “She just wants me to call her on Christmas. I need to figure out what would be the best time to call her in Portland.”

“If you call her at 8 pm here, it will be 10 am in Oregon,” Adeline remarked before getting confused stares, “I…I’m from Oregon, and my school is in Salem. I’ve had to get used to the time difference. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, darling.” Belladonna coos, before turning her attention to Noveletta and Bram, “Are you two planning on seeing your grandparents?”

“No,” Noveletta mutters, “We’d much rather be here.”

“Oh?”

“Grammy and Gramps always have something to say about you guys and Mum when we visit them, as if that’s going to change our feelings,” Bram scoffs, “It’s a lot nicer being here.”

“I wonder if they also call us whipped and boring,” Belladonna muses toward Wilhelm, making him roll his eyes with a smile.

“Adeline, you said you’re studying film,” Hendrick remarks, “What kind of films do you want to make?”

“I’ve always liked stop motion and Claymation,” Adeline answers, “Although I really like the techniques you use in your films.”

“Ah, do you have a favorite film?”

“Oh, Hendrick, please, raven, don’t do this,” Odette murmurs.

“I just wanna know,” He mutters.

“Out of the films you have directed, The Great Image is one of my favorites. My analysis of it got me an A in my Intro. To Film class.” Adeline explains, “As for films you’ve acted in, I love Mico’s Mouses.”

“That… that was my first main role in a movie…”

Adeline stares down at the half-empty plate in front of her. “It was the last movie I watched with my mom before she died.”

“Adeline, I’m sorry—”

She waved her hands in the air, “Please, don’t, I’ve had too many people apologize for death recently, I don’t wanna hear anymore.”

“Maybe you two can make a film together one day,” Bram comments.

“Oh my god, I would faint,” Adeline laughs.

“When you graduate, if you want to make films, I’ll give you a reference if you want it.” Hendrick offers,

“Really! That would be amazing, I—”

The front door slamming made everyone at the table jump, but Wilhelm, “Who the fuck—” Belladonna gasps before being interrupted by Ion’s loud voice.

“ADELINE!”

“I knew it,” Wilhelm mutters.

“WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU!”

“Dad?” Rudolph questions.

“We’re fine,” Wilhelm comments. He’s oddly calm, still eating his dinner at the head of the table as Ion’s heavy and angry footsteps get closer and closer, “I think we might have to start using the gate again,” he adds, “I’ll start cleaning it up tomorrow.”

“What the hell is this?!” Ion scoffs, standing in the archway of the dining room.

“A Christmas dinner,” Belladonna hissed.

“A family dinner,” Wilhelm corrects.

“She,” Ion points at Adeline, “Is not your family.”

“I believe we have treated her more like family in the past…” Wilhelm checks his watch, “2 and a half hour, then you have her entire life.”

“Bram, take your sister and go to her room or something,” Odette mutters to her son before the teen boy picks up Violetta from her highchair.

“You wanna go play Vi?” Bram asks his baby sister before passing Ion, “Douchebag,” he mutters before quickly heading upstairs.

“I will admit, Ion, your obsession with your niece is rather concerning,” Wilhelm mentions.

“I am concerned for her well-being!”

“I care for my nieces and nephews—”

“You have no family!”

Wilhelm scoffs out a laugh, “My family is right here.”

“And in New Orleans,” Belladonna added.

“I am keeping her safe!”

“You have an odd definition of the word safe,” Odette drones.

“Unless you mean safe from us,” Margo notes.

“Who else would I be keeping her safe from!?”

“I have never felt safer than with the people at this table,” Hydrangea adds.

“Everyone in here is a devil spawn!” Ion shrieks.

“I’m not a vampire,” Hydrangea laughs, “Aphrodite, are you a vampire?”

“Nope.”

Every single person but Adeline stares at Ion with narrow gazes that are like piercing daggers into his skin.

“Adeline?” Belladonna asks softly, “Have we made you feel uncomfortable or unsafe?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Have you ever felt unsafe with Rudolph?”

“No, Ma’am.”

“Has your uncle ever made you feel uncomfortable or—”

“Yes, Ma’am,” Adeline quickly replies, a frightened tone in her voice as she stares down at the plate in front of her, her body shaking.

“That's enough for me,” Belladonna sighs, “Would you agree, beloved?

Wilhelm opens his mouth to speak before Ion yells, “I HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING TO YOU, ADELINE. HOW HAVE I MADE YOU FEEL SO UNCOMFORTABLE THAT YOU HAVE RUN INTO THE ARMS OF A PARASITE!”

“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Wilhelm shouts, his bloody tentacles traveling under the table, picking up Ion by the ankle and holding the priest up in the air in front of him, “There is nothing about you that I like! You detest the existence of women because you believe them to be lower than you. You make assumptions about vampires and witches based on a religious fervor, all because of dark age fairytales and hateful stereotypes from shitty movies.”

“PUT ME DOWN!”

“Then you come into my home and yell at my family, ruining one of the very few times everyone is happily together!” Wilhelm hissed, “I tolerate a lot from people, especially from people like you, and I think I control myself, but you’ve gotten on my last nerve. All I ask for is a nice time with my family, to live in peace with my wife, my children, and my grandchildren, and little men like you always want to ruin that.” He flings Ion into the hallway outside of the dining room smacking him into a wall, “Get the fuck out of my home!”

“I will not—” Once Ion was back on his feet, he was faced with red eyes staring at him with looks that could kill, Odette with a large blood red knife in her hand, and Hendrick with a very large icicle pointed in Ion’s direction.

“No one is going to miss you if you were to die,” Wilhelm states frankly, “So just give me a reason.”

“You are a monster,” Ion screams, “All of you!”

“Yet we are loved,” Belladonna remarks. 

“Adeline.”

“No,” she mutters.

“Come on, Adeline!” Ion orders loudly.

“I said no,”

“Adeline!”

“Don’t yell at her!” Noveletta shouts, “All she said was no!”

“What would your father think, Adeline?”

“You fucking bastard!” Rudolph spat, kicking his chair back as he stood up.

“Dad would want me to be happy!” Adeline exclaimed, loudly, “As long as I am safe, Dad would say if I don’t want to go with you, I don’t have to! I am happy with the Con Vesters, I feel safe with them! I won’t go with you!”

She looks embarrassed, her cheeks a hot red color, her head hung low, the way her body shakes, appearing as if she wants to crawl inside herself, her chest tight as if one more word said will make her weep.

Wilhelm sighed, getting up from the table, his sheer size causing Ion to freeze in place, as the old vampire began to approach. “Wilhelm—” Belladonna asked, confused, before he kissed her cheek.

“I’ll be just a moment, swan,” he reassures, “Aphrodite, can you help me for a moment?”

She hums with a nod, placing her napkin on the table, following after her adopted father as he grabs Ion’s shirt collar and carries him out of the house.

“I told you to leave, yet you didn’t listen,” Wilhelm snarls, carrying Ion out the first door. “You are lucky my grandchildren are present, or you would be dead!”

The Catholic priest is tossed outside the gate of the Con Vester house, in front of his vehicle, “If you ever come back, I will kill you no matter who is present!” Ion is informed before Aphrodite and Wilhelm close the gates to the drive up to the house’s garage.

Once they reenter the dining room, Adeline begins to cry, “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean for this to happen! I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry—”

“Darling, don’t apologize,” Belladonna coos, “You have done nothing wrong.”

“How am I going to go home, now?!” Adeline sobs.

“You’re not,” Hendrick comments, “You’re clearly not safe!”

Everyone at the table agreed with Hendrick’s statement, “You are more than welcome to stay here for as long as you want to or need,” Belladonna informs softly, “If you would, like we can find you a hotel so you may be alone.”

“I don’t wanna be alone right now,” Adeline mutters.

“I got some clothes that will fit you, so you don’t have to sleep in your sweater,” Odette comments, getting up from the table.  “Do you wanna take a look…”

Adeline nods, muttering a soft, “That would be nice,” before getting up and following Odette upstairs.

Noveletta follows Odette and Adeline, kissing her father’s cheek as she toddles off, not wishing to be in the awkward atmosphere of the room. Hydrangea and Hendrick also leave the dining room with Aphrodite in an effort to help her clean.

“Is that the Wilhelm you wanted, son?” Wilhelm asks Rudolph.

“Excuse me?” Belladonna mutters.

“Why didn’t you kill him?” Rudolph mumbles.

“I’m not getting blood on our rugs,” Wilhelm comments before giving Belladonna a look, saying we will talk about it later.

“Daddy?” Margo asks, grabbing her father’s attention, “Do you think Ion is committing crimes through the church?”

Wilhelm hums, “You have a hunch?”

“He wears a rather expensive watch,” Margo answers, “I can’t imagine he would be able to afford it… unless he is stealing money.”

The evening is silent for Adeline, an awkward silence, especially after getting clothes from Odette. Interacting with Odette and Noveletta while picking clothes with the two of them was sweet. The house feels warm, inviting, along with safe, and the shower is actually soothing rather than feeling like you have to race against the clock.

But there is a sense of unease that Adeline feels lying in the bed provided for her. She must be right below the nursery because she can hear Violetta’s sound machine faintly coming from above her, and the sound of the house creaking and settling is a little creepy.

She doesn’t want to do what she normally does when she has trouble sleeping, which is watching videos on the internet, because she doesn’t have her earbuds. Yet she grabs her phone anyway, opening her messages with Rudolph.

Are you awake?

The response is immediate: Yeah.

Can you come down here?

Asking the question makes her cringe; it sounds wrong. Yet, there is a soft knock on the door before the door opens, and Rudolph steps into the room. Once she sits up, they just stare at each other for a moment.

“Can you…” she asks, trying to find the words, “Can you—can you… Can you—”

She begins to violently sob before she can even form a sentence that can make any sense, causing Rudolph to rush to her to comfort her, “I’ll do anything for you, Adeline, just tell me what you need!”

“Stay!” She heaves.

“You got it, clover, I’m right here,” Rudolph coos, “I’m not going anywhere.”

[seaside-writings]

Hello, again all you wonderfully, wicked people!

As we know black cats are an essential part of the spooky season as well as an essential part of everyday life! So in honor of that, I made a prompt list dedicated to one of my favorite black cats Salem Saberhagen, who in my opinion had some of the most iconic dialogue in TV history!

I hope you all like this prompt list, and I hope it helps you create! And if you do use it, please credit/tag me so I can check out what you've made!

I hope you all stay blessed and safe throughout your day.

Lots of Love & Wishes: Celia 🖤🎃🕸🔮

P.s. I did change some of the dialogue so it would flow easier when it came to writing for different types of characters.

“You’re the only one who understands me,” “Yeah, but it doesn’t mean I care,” - “What are you doing?” “Nothing!” “You’re in a chatroom again pretending to be a woman, aren’t you?” “I like the attention.” - “I have lighted the fuse. Now I just have to wait for the kapowie! Muahahaha!” - “I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you; I just wanted to rule you,” - “You’ll be able to look back on all of this and get revenge,” - “Show me the tuna!” - "I never cared for the name Mildred," - “And let’s give a big warm welcome to sadness,” - “Someone’s gonna end up crying. Probably me,” - “Finally, someone whose life is more pathetic than mine!” - “You don't have to order me a pizza, but make it half sausage, half clam,” - “I need a little fresh air and a latte,”

“As long as you drop everything and stay focused on me, I should be fine,” - “Dogs guard. Cats watch and judge,” - “When I’m happy, I eat! When I’m upset, I eat!” - “Hooray, the toast is stuck! Danger, here I come!” - “They left behind. Be strong. Don’t cry,” - “Still want to take over the world?" - "Cheetos should be served at room temperature, you know,” - “Curse my sarcastic nature!” - “If you misbehave for just one instant, I’ll cut you, man,” - “Dear lord, you picked up a guy at the bus station,” - “It's the 90s, no one eats mortals anymore,” - “I’m rich! Rich, I tell you!” It’s only a few hundred dollars,” “I’m well-off! Well-off, I tell you!” - “Let's destroy everything that's dear to him. Let's indoctrinate him into the cathedral of agony,” “I'm going to write him a very stern letter,” “You're a regular Mad Max, aren't you?” - “A tassel! Don’t you toy with me, you saucy minx!” - “Wow, you must feel like a huge loser,” - “Would you be terribly upset if I threw up in one of your shoes?” - “You laugh, you die,” - “I will not be ignored!” - “All I’ve done all day is eat, sleep, and stare off into space. What an awful existence,” “Hey! I don’t dump on your lifestyle," - “Could you either remove the bandages or kill me?” - “Sorry, thirty waffles is my limit,” - “You think a mirrored ceiling would be too much?” - “Why didn’t you stop them!?” “I was busy,” “Doing what!?” “Playing with my scrunchie,” - “We need a plan,” “How about we weep uncontrollably,” - “I urge you to accept me as your ruler!” - “I’ll be having a quiet weekend, curled up with Memoirs Of A Geisha,” - “Delivery. I want a pizza as fast as possible! And don’t forget the crazy bread!” - “And your face is a bit of a trainwreck too,” - “Tell Elton John he can’t start singing now,” - “I wasn’t always the stud muffin I am today,”

“You owe her an apology. Now! “I’m thinking of how to word it,” “Try 'I’m sorry,'” “Somehow, that just doesn’t feel right…” - “I’d rather be locked in the dishwasher again,” - “Does she know who you are?” “Why does everyone think that’s a necessary part of love,” - “I’m the ultimate bad example,” - “Don’t ask me, I was an English major,” - “Hey, leave the sarcasm to the professionals,” - “Get a real job. And some pants,” - “I’m a cat, I’m curious, so kill me,” - “Still want to take over the world?” “Yes! Wait, no! I meant no!” - “I’d be more nervous if I weren’t so good-looking,” - “Hey chicks, what’s the haps?” - “I’m trying to set the world record for grooving,” - “Sometimes I just like to hear myself talk,” - “You know me any excuse to wear taffeta,” - “Oh, right, I forgot. I’m an animal, I have no self-control,” - “Why am I finding it hard to summon sympathy?” - “Wow, I love a woman who can take charge!” - “I’ll be downstairs creating a distraction,” - “I’m trying to concentrate on expanding my intellectual horizons,” - “Wake up, woman! You’re not a princess, you’re a dragon!” - “Her new obsession is doing wonders for my wardrobe!” - “Please hurry! I’ve been in here for over an hour!” “Why didn’t you call us sooner?” “It wasn’t a problem until I ran out of peanut brittle!” - “So it's true. Taste does skip a generation,” - “I want to say something wise and wonderful right now, but I can't think of anything. Except I love you, and I hope the band knows some Ohio Player,” - “BOO!” “You look ridiculous,” “You were terrified, and you know it,” - “Halloween. Is it just another date on the calendar, or is a state of mind, or is a state of… being?”