#I think I flake out of things only like 10% of the time

[rowanhoney]

I actually can’t deal with unreliable people at all and i don’t want them around me anymore

[wild-jackalope]

summary :: the times things went wrong during sex! Featuring my favs; Gojo, Choso, Yuji, Megumi and Toge.

warning :: sex, awkward sex (it happens), safe sex!

note :: all characters are of age!

Satoru (the sound)

The two of you had been going for some time, your third round of the night. Satoru had done a particularly good job in making you utterly wet, which was now the cause of your chest threatening to burst with laughter.

Whenever Satoru buried himself deep in you, it caused an odd kind of squelching noise. You placed your hand over your mouth, giggling against it.

Satoru had come to a gradual halt, noticing your puffs weren’t the moaning kind. “You’re laughing?” He asked in a tone that conveyed he was judging your juvenile sense of humour.

“I’m sorry, it’s just funny! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin the mood. Please continue.” It’d only taken a moment of silence before you laughed again, now joined by Satoru.

“Jeez, you’re stupid.”

Choso (too long)

It had been around 20 minutes, Choso was still panting against your neck with his dick buried deep inside you, rutting against your insides.

You’d already reached your climax 10 minutes ago, so now his dick felt like it was giving you an inside gut punch.

“Choso, you close?” You huffed, clawing at his back.

“Almost there, my love.”

You whined, staring up at the ceiling and debating how much longer you could keep up. You’d already tried clenching around him, but hadn’t seemed to help and making out only made him slow down to appreciate your kisses.

You tapped on his shoulder, sighing gratefully when he slowed to a stop.

“Can we take a break? I’m feeling a little raw.”

His eyes seemed to widen with the realisation and he slipped out of you. “I’m so sorry for not noticing.”

“No no, it’s fine baby just give me a little bit and I’ll be okay.”

Yuji (no protection)

You’d been making out for at least an hour, with Yuji’s body pushing you into his mattress and his hands cupping your rounded curves.

He’d barely even broken from your lips to pull out his desk drawer and feel around for a condom. However his hand failed to brush against any wrappers.

“Fuck, I forgot to buy my condoms.”

“Are you serious?”

The two of you were well horny by now, each reeling from the effects of arousal.

Yuji eyed you carefully, face flushed and expression needy. You leaned back into the bed defensively.

“We’re not doing it raw.” You stated. He exhaled sharply.

“I know, I know. Damn.”

Megumi (came quickly)

You straddled him, sliding carefully onto his cock before relaxing at his base. This was a position neither of you had tried before, both your excitement was palpable from the way his dick twitched and how your pussy gushed.

He breathed sharply, fingers digging into your thighs holding you still. He needed to pace himself, otherwise this would be over too soon.

Playfully, you clenched your walls around him.

“Shit.”

His hips bucked into you, humping out his orgasm. You felt warm cum pool into the condom, causing you to shiver. “Already?” You asked.

He only responded by palming his face, covering his embarrassment from you.

“You must really like me topping you.” You grinned, kissing the hand that covered his face.

“Shut up.”

Toge (poor communication)

“You want…”

“Bonito flakes.”

You pressed your lips into a thin line, face red and utterly flustered. “Crap. This is really hard. I can’t tell what you want me to do.”

He wanted you to relax and not overthink things.

“I don’t know where I can touch you. Do you even want me to touch you? Do you even want to have sex?” You asked, fretting that you had gotten the wrong idea.

Toge rolled his eyes. One would think him making out with you until your lips were red raw and touching every sensitive part of your body was a good indicator that yes, he did want to have sex. “Salmon.”

His answer only further worried you. So instead of attempting to talk, Toge took your hand and placed it on his crotch, letting you feel how hard he’d gotten.

You flushed.

“Right, I think I understand now..”

[inf3ct3dd]

loser!ellie headcanons pt.6

summary: ellieeee my chiquitita my baby my love

warnings: none :3

authors note: ik yall missed herrrr

masterlist. help palestine.🇵🇸

- ellie tries to be soooo cool and wear her cool people jackets (leather jackets, canvas, those carhartt hoodie jackets etc) but they’re very not helpful against the cold and you’ll be out with her and shes just SHIVERING the whole time…

- she’s obsessed w those “general knowledge quizzes” on tiktok. that girl is a hoe for trivia she’s sitting on her bed at three in the morning saying her answers OUT LOUD while she watches them. she gets so upset when she gets literally any wrong… “man…im not a quiz master 🙁”

- ik in the games she walks around with her little journal and shit but i feel like shes definitely jus constantly typing shit in her notes app… random thoughts and jokes and shit that she most definitely shows you at the end of the day

- she barely ever baby talks to babies… she’ll go up to a baby and just be like “wassup dude” and have a full blown conversation with him while the babies just sitting there babbling and giggling at her

- thinks those “im nothing like yall” slideshows r so hilarious…. like you’ll be on the couch and she’s just giggling at her phone at paracetamol 😞

- references the most niche memes ever constantly and literally googles them to explain herself. you guys went camping and she said “boy you want hot dog” and you were like ????

- so strangely particular about how her stuff is arranged 😭 her desk looks like an absolute hot mess 90% of the time but SHE UNDERSTANDS IT and if u try and organize it for her she just puts it back how it was

- always says “guys” and “yall” when she’s talking to literally one person. and CHAT. she just constantly adds it into conversation like “chat how are you today”

- loves asking if things are “fire.” she’ll cook you something and you take a bite and shes like “is that shit fire???” she has to know

- obsessed with “i barely know her” jokes. the second someone says something ending in er shes like “rider??? i barely know her!!” and she’s laughing her ass off

- that girl will go HAM on some mac and cheese. but it can only be really good baked mac or the shitty kraft mac and cheese. she puts like- hella pepper and red chili flakes in it and eats it straight out of the pot 🔥 its always at like three in the morning and you just walk in the kitchen to her with a pot in her lap watching glee or some shit

- SPEAKING. OF. glee is most definitely one of her guilty pleasure shows…like shes rewatched it a million times and glee cast was one of her top artists on apple music wrapped

- shes an apple music user. send tweet.

- got yelled at by an old lady once cuz she picked her flowers out of her front yard and gave them to you

- when i tell you that girl goes ham on those tiny clementines… she’ll eat like 10 in one day and theres just PEELS. EVERYWHERE.

- also she fw grapes heavy. especially green grapes (shes a weird little freak red grapes are so much better)

- OBSESSED WITH THOSE BLIND BAG SHITS. especially mini brands oh my god she definitely has the whole lil grocery store set and she’s so obsessed with it.

- her house slippers are definitely just a pair of crocs with the fur inside and a bunch of stupid ass jibbits. she buys the mega packs off amazon and changes them whenever shes bored

- has SO MANY drafts on tiktok and they’re all her trying filters staring at the screen like 😯

- most annoying person to sleep next to ever . snoring, sleep talking, moving around CONSTANTLY and hitting you accidentally, the only way she sleeps peacefully is if you’re holding her or she’s holding you, otherwise shes insane

- weirdly into linguistics…that girl is using humongous words for no good reason just for fun and half the time she has no idea what they mean and when she googles them and shes right about the definition she does that little fist pump and “fuck yes”

- speaking of. that girl is SPEEDRUNNING DUOLINGO . she’s fluent in (bad spaniard) spanish from it, and just learns random languages for fun. you speak a different language? she’s learning it immediately. definitely leaves notes for you in random languages she learned and you have to pull out a translator to understand wtf shes talking about… she also sleep talks in spanish sometimes and its so funny

- loves trying out different recipes…like i said my girl is a CHEF she will be at home fucking up a salmon bake she made and making you homemade pho for dinner

- had a phase when she was younger when she was really into the la bamba movie and dressed like richie valens for two years

- also cried so hard when she watched selena with you…that girl was devastated 💔 every time she hears “dreaming of you” she almost sheds a tear

“when that yolanda bitch gets out of prison….im shooting someone . its obvious who its gonna be.”

- she definitely begged joel to buy her a gun for christmas and he would take her to the range all the time so she can SHOOT. that girl is goated at lazer tag she gets down…does not play

- thought that candy cigarettes were the coolest thing ever when she was little… everywhere she went she had one hanging out of the side of her mouth and shed hold them between her fingers like they do in movies. if you two go to a candy shop shes for sure buying a pack

[arsenal-womens-1]

I see you in my reflection part 2

Tw: guns school shooting death blood self harm description of death murder panic attack if there’s any I’ve missed sorry

“The bravest thing I ever did was continue my life when I wanted to die.” — Juliette Lewis

“If you love someone, you say it. You say it right then, out loud. Otherwise, the moment just passes you by.” — Mark Sloan

Six hours later, you are on your way back to Leah's. It was just going to be Beth, Viv, you, and Leah having dinner tonight after you’re planning on watching a movie called *The Fallout*. You have no clue what it’s about, but it’s apparently meant to be good. It’s cold outside, not too cold, but still cold. The car comes to a stop. Finally, you get out of the car and run to the door. Leah walks up the stairs as slowly as possible, finally opening the door. You run in, running straight to the kitchen. Leah had agreed to let you help with dinner. It’s called marry me chicken. It takes about 45 minutes to cook.

“Right, get all the ingredients out, and we can start cooking,” Leah says, pulling out all the ingredients: 30 g of plain flour, 4 chicken breasts, 125 g sundried tomatoes in oil (drained and roughly chopped), 3 tbsp oil (reserved), 1 red onion (finely chopped), 3 garlic cloves (crushed or finely grated), ½ - 1 tsp chili flakes (to taste), 2-3 thyme or oregano sprigs (leaves picked), or 1 tsp mixed dried herbs, 150 ml of double cream, 250 ml of chicken stock, 35 g parmesan (grated), 8-10 basil leaves (torn), and lemon wedges.

Halfway through making it, there is a knock at the door before Leah can say anything. You run to the door. Beth and Viv are just standing there. “Come in,” you say, taking off their shoes and coats. You all walk back into the kitchen where Leah is still doing stuff for the food. “How was media day?” You just shrug your shoulders at that.

“Boring, mainly they all ask the same question, just in a different way,” you reply. Beth and Vivian just shake their heads. You have said multiple times that you don’t like media days. This is only the second one you’ve done, but you still have the same opinion: “Yeah, they do that a lot apart from a few, and since you couldn’t do any work today, you need to do a bit more tomorrow.” The only downside of living with Beth and Vivian is that they make you do schoolwork. It’s the most boring thing.“What if I don’t do any more schoolwork?” you ask.

Viv loses it at your shoes, saying that no matter what you are doing, the work is still there.

You just accept your fate. “Can someone call my phone? I’ve lost it. It’s aging.” Leah holds your phone up and says, “Thank you.” Opening your phone, there is a text from your dad.

Dad:

“Hey kid, I know we haven’t spoken in a bit, but I thought I would text you and see how you are doing. Also, Max and Missy want to know if you are going to be home this summer for their birthday.”

You:

“Hey Dad, I’m doing good. I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it home this summer, but tell Max and Missy that I miss them and I wish I could be there, but I can’t. I’ll send them presents.”

Dad:

“It’s okay, kid. You don’t have to apologize. I know why you don’t want to come back, but they wanted to know if you were able to come. It’s good to hear that you’re doing well. I have to go. The twins need to be dropped off at your grandma’s house.”

You:

“I’ll text you later. I love you too.”

“Who are you texting?” Leah asks as she finishes cooking.

“My dad was asking if I was going home this summer.” In the time the team had, knowing you’ve only ever said that you lived in America, you dodged any other questions, so at one point they all just left it, seeing that you didn’t want to talk about it before you got there. “Are you going home this summer?” they asked.

“No, I think I’m just going to go to another country,” you told them.

They all nodded. “What country are you thinking of going to?”

You had thought about this a lot. “I was thinking Norway, Sweden, Spain, or the Netherlands. I’ve always wanted to go to those countries.” When you said “Netherlands,” Viv smiled a bit for the next 45 minutes. You all talked for 20 minutes before the food was done. It was time for the movie.

The movie starts with a girl sitting on the toilet. Three minutes later, she walks to the bathroom. Viv and Beth are sitting next to each other, and Leah is in the middle. On the end, exactly seven minutes in, it sounds like a door banging and screaming more. It feels like your heart is about to pound out of your chest. A lump in your throat starts to form.

Blood everywhere, screaming, bullets.

“I can’t breathe.” The second you say that, all three of them are beside you. Vivian lifts you up and places you in her lap. “Copy my breathing pattern.”

“Y/N, I’m scared.” The door slams open.

“They didn’t do anything wrong; it should have been me.” Your breathing isn’t slowing down. “They didn’t deserve it; we were just kids.” Beth is now standing behind you, kind of trapping you like a burrito. “Copy my breathing, kid.” You try your best to copy her breathing, eventually doing so.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Your head is still on Vivian’s chest.

“I’m a twin… was a twin. The shock on their faces was something. We were identical. Lucy was 1 minute and 25 seconds older than me. She always would use that or say it was the best time of her life.” Tears were falling down your face. The girls said nothing, so you continued. “When we were 4, we moved from California to New York. Our next-door neighbors had a girl our age. Her name was Lily. She had green eyes, brown hair, and was a little bit taller than us. We became inseparable. We were in the same class. It was grade 6; we were in 4th period English with Miss Cooper. We sat at the back of her class.”

“Today we are learning about Romeo and Juliet.” Lily is to the left of you, and Lucy is to the right. “Lily, give me a pencil; I’ve forgotten mine again.”

“We were 12 minutes into the class when the first shouts could be heard two doors down from us. The screams for help were horrifying. We did everything they said to do. He was down with that class fast. He moved to the one next to us. There was a door connecting both classrooms together. We didn’t barricade it.”

The sound of the door crashing open startles everyone. Before anyone can do anything, he’s shooting randomly all over, and in 2 minutes, he’s gone.

“Lily was on the ground. She was in a pool of blood. He shot her 6 times; 2 of them hit her left lung. I tried to stop the bleeding, but it was no use. Her lungs were filling up with blood. Her beautiful face was covered in blood. She was scared. I could tell because of the way her eyes looked. She would get that look when she was scared. Lucy laid her head on my shoulder. She had been shot once, between her chest and shoulder. I remember Lily’s eyes starting to shut. I remember saying, ‘Come on, Lily, keep your eyes open for me. Keep them open.’ I remember her last words so clearly: ‘Y/N, it’s okay. It’s okay. Go be a superstar, win all the trophies. Don’t give up on your dream.’ There was another round of shots. The color in her eyes was gone. She was gone.”

“No, no, no, Lily, don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me.” Armed police rush through the door. “Everyone show hands.”

“I don’t really remember much about how I got from the classroom to the ambulance. I remember the paramedic saying that I had been shot 3 times. I didn’t even know that I had been shot. I was in shock. I remember the sirens. I remember them asking questions, getting wheeled into the ER. I was next to Lucy. I remember her heart monitor. I didn’t know what it meant except that she was alive. Within 2 minutes of being there, she flatlined. They tried to get her back, but they couldn’t. 14:25 was her time of death. A piece of the bullet had made its way to her heart. They were dead, and I wasn’t. After that, I turned to self-harm and other things. I wanted to be with them. It wasn’t until about 2 months after it all that it sank in that I had lost my twin sister and my first love in the same day

[crow-stars]

❝TAKE A BITE, DON'T BE SHY!❞

❦summary; trying new things is always encouraged, especially by lilia, though that doesn't extend to that fae's cooking... ♪the characters in this story; gn!reader, lilia vanrouge ✎word count; 992 ❀what do the ghosts say?; ambiguous, lilia cooks, lilia discovers spicy foods, reader is lilia's victim taste tester, saved by the bell (literally) ☛the author's notes; sebek likers are gonna like tomorrow i think ☪look at the catalogue?

Lilia liked to cook, nobody could deny that. And, of course, everyone but Lilia knew not to let him within several feet within a stove. They can’t manage to stop him all the time and Lilia is always coming across new recipes and always wanting to put a spin on it. 

Today was one of those fateful days, where Lilia has decided to take up the apron and try a new recipe. 

And you were, unfortunately, chosen as Lilia’s taste tester. Well, you were more so the chosen sacrifice by the other dormmates, who all conveniently left the dorm around the time Lilia had planned to begin cooking. And so, here you were, sitting in the Diasomnia kitchen, a strained smile on your face as Lilia hums, walking around the kitchen and putting things together. 

The recipe that Lilia wanted to make was spicy cookies and, just from what you were seeing, it wasn’t going to be a pretty sight. You watched in horror at the amount of peppers and pepper flakes Lilia put into the bowl. It almost made your tongue burn seeing just the amount. Not to mention that your eyes were beginning to tear up as well even when you were as far as you could possibly be from the bowl Lilia was using. 

 The worst part of it all was that Lilia seemed unaffected, carrying on as normal. One would expect, with the amount of peppers and pepper flakes in the bowl, you would be feeling the effects of the capsaicin, but not Lilia. Oh no, he was practically putting his face into the bowl, glaring at the amount before apparently deciding that the monstrous amount of powder in the bowl wasn’t enough for the batch Lilia wanted to make. And he said he wanted to make enough for the whole dorm.

Eventually, thankfully, Lilia decided that enough was enough and began the process of mixing. That was... it was certainly an experience that one wouldn’t want to see again. There was no grace, no rhythm, no process to how Lilia mixed the dough, if you could call it that. It looked more akin to a sludge, yet also a slime, but also looking like it was more powder than anything else. You don’t even think he put any sugar in it, even though they were supposed to be cookies. Or anything besides that tear inducing concoction of mixed spices. It definitely wasn’t something you’d want to even think of consuming and it most definitely wasn’t supposed to be that color. You couldn’t even find the proper words to describe the hellish color of it, no mortal words could dare to describe.

“Um... Lilia, aren’t you going to add sugar or something..?”

Lilia looked up from where he was stirring, a wide grin on his lips. He had some flour covering his cheeks, that sparkle in his eyes that he got when excited. It would have been a memorable sight if not for the fact he was mixing your demise.

“Hm? Oh, no, no! They’re supposed to be spicy cookies! So that means that if I add the sugar, it might not be as spicy.” 

That did not settle well for you and Lilia resumed his stirring. 

Then, he began making balls out of the dough, varying in sizes and put them on the parchment paper. They weren’t keeping the shape intended, the ratio of dry ingredients to wet ingredients unbalanced and making the dough fall apart into a clumpy mess. Lilia at the very least tried to get them to stay together before he gave up and left them as is. 

The worst part of it all was watching Lilia put it in the oven. He put the oven at 500 degrees, set to bake for 10 minutes. You half expected Diasomnia to burn down, but surprisingly, and thankfully, it didn’t. Of course, that seemed like the only good outcome to this whole debacle, as Lilia was taking his man-made horror out of the oven and putting it onto the counter to cool off. 

It looked disgusting, to say the least. It wasn’t even in the shape of cookies, but lumps of charcoal, small specks of red peeking out, but otherwise looked as hard as a rock. 

“Alright, it’s ready for eating!” 

Oh, right. You were supposed to be the taste tester. Oh no.

This was when you sat up in attention, eyes wide and a shot of panic ran through your body. Lilia was already approaching you with one of his cookies in hand. You began to panic, he was already holding it out to you, an expectant smile on his face as he awaits for you to take it. 

“Aha... um...” 

“What, are you shy? Would you like me to feed it to you instead?” Lilia chuckles in almost amusement as he decides for you and begins to come closer to you. He has one hand holding the monstrosity and the other under it so no crumbs will fall onto the floor. And the smell is vile up close, a horrible mix of a burnt smell mixed with the smell of peppers tenfold and somehow a sweet undertone. It makes you almost gag, stomach churning as the smell invades your senses. 

But then, like a savior, your phone manages to ring, your reminder that class was going to start soon. You shoot up from your seat and plaster an apologetic smile on your lips. 

“It’s almost time for me to go to class! I should get going! Like— Right now!” You gather your things quickly enough before Lilia has enough time to answer. “Sorry I couldn’t try your cookies, bye!” 

You’re quick to make your escape, leaving the Diasomnia dorm without another word. It leaves Lilia sitting with the ‘cookie’ in his hands. He stares at it for a second before taking a bite out of it and humming in thought.

“Hmm... more peppers perhaps?”

[jowrites]

Otherwordly - Jake Sim Drabble

No warnings, just fluff! Jake x Reader

Inspired by this song

You felt the chill run down your spine, making you wake up from your slumber. You noticed the moonlight was the only light illuminating the room, and saw the door to the outside was open. You turned over on your side and found the spot beside you empty. He must have gotten up, or maybe he just couldn’t sleep. You got up and found a robe beside your bed and put it over your naked body, very convenient but you knew you probably didn’t even need it but the chill of the night was getting to you.

You saw his figure sitting down along the water, his legs resting in it as he seemed to be focusing on something in his hand. You didn’t know what it was, but you had a hunch. You quietly walked up behind your lover, rubbing his back before sitting beside him. You then realized why it was so cold as you stared at the snow falling in front of your eyes. The water was steaming and you couldn’t help but take your robe off and dip into the warm water. Your body immediately relaxed.

“Can’t sleep?” you asked, still staring ahead at the snow, walking over to the edge and holding your hand out as you watched the white flakes melt on your skin.

“No, not really. I just have been thinking a lot. Did I wake you?” Jake admired your form, smiling to himself as you looked like a kid seeing snow for the first time. He just loved you so much.

“About what? And no, just when you’re not with me I can tell and it makes me uneasy,” you said looking back at him and saw him fiddle with whatever, putting it out of your sight. 

“Sorry, love. You look absolutely divine right now. I almost feel like it’s a crime to be looking at you,” he complimented, feeling loss for words as you were glowing from the moonlight. How your skin was glistening from the water, how your nipples perked from the cold as you stood in the water. You smiled at him holding out your hand wanting him to join you. 

He quickly removed his boxers and entered the water, reaching out for your waist and pulling you to his body.

“You’re so out of this world, how did I get so lucky?” he whispered more to himself but you chuckled. You took one of his hands in yours and admired it, loving his hands always seemed to fit yours even if they were 10 times bigger. You studied them, just how perfect he fit you always. How perfect he was for you.

“Marry me.”

And that was the question you figured he had been conflicted on the past 2 weeks. When would he ask you? You wondered when he would do it, but you figured he was just waiting for the right time and this trip to Japan was the perfect time to do so. Jake had been waiting for months to ask you. Times when he thought he would ask always seemed different and when plans would cancel or things would come up, he got frustrated with the timing and just decided to wait. When you suggested going to Japan for a couple weeks to destress and get away from everything, he knew there would be a perfect moment. And that moment was now.

“Yes, a thousand yeses and then more,” you smiled at him. He stared deep into your eyes and in that moment he knew you understood everything he wanted to say and then more. He didn’t have to say anything because just his eyes always told you how much he loved you. 

He got out of your grasp, turning around and reaching for the small box he’s been hiding. He came back and opened it revealing the most beautiful opal ring, it shining perfectly in the moonlight. He took it out and took your hand and placed the ring on your finger. He lifted it up to his lips and stared into his eyes as he kissed your fingers over and over again.

“I have been waiting for this moment for years. Thank you for making me the happiest man on this planet. I am going to love and care for you for the rest of your existence. Please, always count on me, always lean on me, I’ll always be here to cherish you. I love you, so much, Y/N,” He wiped a tear from your eye as you leaned your forehead on his, nodding and agreeing silently. 

But you didn't need to hear me

'Cause you were supraluminal

Knew me without an uttered word

You always seemed to know me

[butmakeitgayblog]

Guten tag! I was just wondering, in your clexa au’s minus the canon one, what are each of Clarke and Lexas lockscreen?

Ooo German that's so fun 😀 I always think it's so mind blowing finding out where people are from all over the world. It's surreal, in a wonderful way 💕

Ok so, I thought a lot about this

MBFW: depends on when you were to look at it. If we're talking Lexa in the friendship era, generally it's a picture of whatever was the last time they were together, so generally a holiday photo or a pic of them on some beach: heads pressed together and sunglasses perfectly dipped to "make it fashion💅". Maybe the occasional stolen pic of Clarke napping on her chest. Ya know. Totally normal friend things... If we're talking marriage era, then it's always a family picture. A selfie style shot with Clarke and the kids flaked out on the couch for movie night in the background. A Griffin-Woods gang lineup of them hanging out by the pool on a summer day. Everybody in matching reindeer pajamas, standing in front of their Christmas tree loaded with presents. A very bizarre tablue of characters depicting everyone dressed up for trick-or-treating. That kind of thing. Lexa loves keeping stuff like that as her lockscreen cuz not only can she look at them any time she has to travel, but it's an excellent excuse to show off her little family so easily 😌

For Clarke, it is always Lexa. Always. Friendship era, family era, whatever. It's Lexa in some shape or form. Their kids always have a place on her homescreen, but Lexa has her lockscreen all to her own. That's her wife and her best friend in the entire world, always has been. That's her other half, and she had to spend an obnoxiously long time waiting for her, so she's damn well gonna look at that face any time she feels like it 😤

AWTR: Lexa had a flip phone because she was an 85 year old woman stuck in a 23 year old's body 🥴

Clarke keeps one of their wedding reception photos as it for a long while. A candid moment Monty had snapped when Clarke was laughing at something just out of frame, but all Lexa had eyes for was her. She looked happy. And very much in love with Clarke, for some inexplicable reason. They have classier ones from that day, but Clarke liked that one in particular a lot. For awhile after that it was the picture Raven took of them together that night when they'd hung out with the delinquents, when Lexa had held her and kissed her neck as a tipsy Clarke just relished in the closeness. Breathing in the way Lexa's hair smelled like shampoo and autumn bonfire smoke. Clarke liked that one too, enough that it gets framed and hung up in her house wherever she goes. But as time goes on she does evenly decide it's ok to choose other things. Pictures of art pieces that move her mostly, sometimes snapshots from her travels.

Demon au: Canot stress enough how little neither of them would care lol. If anything, Lexa would put something entirely inappropriate and private enough to have a once-human Clarke turning 10 shades of red. But as it is, Clarke would just find her ridiculous girlfriend funny and just so fucking Lexa, and thus try to give her something sinfully new to change it too next 😏

Cruel Intentions: they're disgusting. It's all very sappy. Always pictures of them kissing, if them wrapped up in each other's arms, of them draped over each other in bed. They have no filter and no fucks to give. But that's also how Clarke always knows if Lexa is annoyed with her about something and just not talking about it. Because if she sees her wife has replaced her with that godless chicken she pretends is a cat, she knows she's fucked up somewhere.

CoA: Clarke is functionally allergic to caring about her phone. She's busy, she works on computers a decent amount and spends her days with tiny patients, so when she's home she just wants to be home. Her phone is like... a tool in her mind. It's just the square in her pocket that she googles actors names on and that Raven uses to harrass her through text messages and that she can use to track down her wife around the hospital to see of she's free to go to lunch. So it's pretty much the same picture of them together on her couch (and the one of Lexa stretched out naked and asleep in their bed as the wallpaper) for several years until the women in her life start giving her shit for never changing it, and then it gets replaced by a new one of Lexa or both of them. Rinse and repeat every few years when she gets bored of hearing about it.

Lexa changes hers too often to narrow it down. Anything that feels fun in the moment. A pretty landscape. Clarke's face. A waterfall they saw on vacation. Clarke's face. A piece of architecture or art that makes her feel something. Clarke's face and a tasteful hint of her breasts. Her interests vary, you understand. She contains multitudes.

[marimayscarlett]

I know it's by now an exhausted topic but I wasn't around for that era so hopefully you can enlighten me about Richard's wedding. From the few photos that I've seen I'm so confused. It looked a beach wedding but then also very public? Lots of random people and then in one photo there was a whole film crew? Not like wedding videographer but a boom guy and a huge shoulder camera..? Also, do we know where it was? New York? And lastly, did only Till attended? I know it was a rough time for the band and maybe emotions were too high for some to attend but idk. Richard said he proposed after just 3 days so I always thought the wedding followed very soon after.

Hi 👋

I also wasn't really around for this era, since Richard married when I was about 5 years old, but I try my best to gather the information I have 😌

First of all, here's an article about the wedding by the German magazine Bravo including an English translation:

Caron and Richard married on the 29th of October 1999 and indeed had a beach wedding at the Montauk Beach in Long Island, New York. Since Caron is jewish, they had a jewish ceremony performed by a rabbi and Richard composed the music for said ceremony - apparently quite sad music, of which he said he maybe subconsciously foreshadowed some events in his marriage 👀 (mentioned here around the 10 minute mark).

The wedding was somewhat big with about 100 guests in attendance (so I guess the 'random' people you recognised were just guests), and except for Flake, everyone of the band attend with Till being Richard's best man. I think the 'rough time' for the band only started after the wedding, since Richard left New York three days after the ceremony to work on a new Rammstein album which turned out to be the 'Mutter' record. We have to be careful not to make the infamous 'Mutter era' responsible for everything we see in this time period and apparently, everyone was still quite friendly with each other here 😊 I could be totally wrong, but I don't quite think the conflicts where already there/that high as they turned out to be later.

And wedding movies were a thing back then, so maybe that's the reason for the camera man?

Caron and Richard seemingly were introduced to each other in the summer of 1998, other sources state they dated for 9 months before the wedding. Richard took Caron's name and used the double name Kruspe-Bernstein until their divorce was finalised in I think 2005.

Here are some pictures of the ceremony, including the bride and groom, Khira Li and Margaux:

[pants-magic-pants]

✧⊹JARETH BALLROOM COAT⊹✧

[This post is part of a series about constructing Jareth’s entire masquerade ball costume. Visit the master post here.]

Making the Buttons [Post 1 of 2] - This post is an explanation of the process. - Post 2 is a video.

The buttons were the very first thing I made, once enough pretty shiny materials had been collected. They were so much fun. They weren't hard, it just took a bit of time and attention to detail. With that, let's get to it...

The coat has two in front and two in the back. Here are two different photos, the first from Aria Couture and the second from Yosa Addiss.

You’ll see that they’ve suffered some damage through the years, and as of now there are no high definition close-ups of them, so that we can really look and discern what might have been there back when everything was intact. One of the front ones is gone!

What I did notice was a general warmth and multidimensional sort of coloring about them, which is why my approach involved layers. A lot of aspects of this costume don’t present themselves as definitively colored; there’s always a two-toned or iridescent quality to them. For that reason, I built everything on top of a layer of copper flakes. It gave the buttons the warmth they needed despite that the rest of what is seen within them is cool-toned. 

There are the blue, spherical cabochons lining the outside; spherical, not angular. Within them, there is seemingly a mix of silver/metallic beads, and “crystals” that may have been anything from blue, to green, to yellow. Hard to say. This part comes down to the individual!

Does this diagram make sense and it is necessary? Probably not.

My choice was to do alternating silver and transparent grey beads, and then pool the center with hot glue and sea glass shards that were left over from the breaking down process. Since making the video of the replica, I did start to feel that less vs. more looked better for the glass, so I pruned a few pieces out of my buttons. I like them overall, but they need to be secured really well, and there was/is still a risk of shards popping out. It is a delicate costume. 

Next, we need to discuss the actual button bases. This was tricky. The whole thing is going to be covered, so they can’t be stitched on in the normal way, as there’s no outlet for the needle. You might be thinking a shank button would be good, since they are flat with protruding holes underneath:

BUT there's so much stuff that needs to go on them, they would definitely end up drooping. My solution to this problem was to buy flat just run-of-the-mill 4-hole buttons that were stapled onto cardboard, and remove the cardboard with the staples still attached. Then tighten the staples so that my needle could juuuuust get through. 

How do you like these puppies?!

Attaching them wasn’t too hard. I held the button a little bit away from the coat, brought my needle to the inside interfacing, and poked it out where the button should go, then brought the needle underneath the staple, then back into the coat, etc. etc. making 5-10 loops before pulling the thread and drawing up the button against the coat. Then, the needle was brought through the inside and knotted tightly into the interfacing, almost exactly where it had begun. 

Yayyyy buttons.

Because these were so delicate, they were almost the last thing added to the coat. They had to go on before the lining was closed, obviously, so that’s the only reason they came before the glue shenanigans. Glue shenanigans were all top switched once the coat didn’t need to be handled or laid down anymore. 

So... there it is. Some of this felt redundant but then I remember that there are new people visiting my blog, and I want things to be easy for them.

----------------☆--------☆---------------

[whentherewerebicycles]

top 10 things i cooked in 2023

this year i made 104 unique recipes (plus lots of duplicates when i liked something enough to make it multiple times). the places i went to most for recipes were feasting at home + the NYT recipes app, although i very much liked the weekday vegetarians, love and lemons, cookie & kate, nora cooks, and the foodie takes flight.

my top 10, in no particular order:

NYT ricotta pasta with roasted broccoli and crispy chickpeas (super simple but a great yummy pasta to make real quick for friends. I roasted the broccoli instead of broiling and added lots of extra lemon zest, garlic, red pepper flakes, and a tray of oven-roasted chickpeas)

moroccan vegetable tagine (i blended a bunch of recipes but the one linked was my starting point. this is the one form i like butternut squash in lol. modifications: i went heavy on all the spices but especially the cinnamon and cardamom, added chopped dried apricots to the stew for extra sweetness, and threw in a bunch of extra veggies. yum)

indian-ish nachos with cheddar, black beans and chutney (do NOT skip the multiple chutneys and sauces. it will seem like too much work you will say can't i just make one and be done with it but those sauces are where the magic lies. the great tragedy of these nachos is that i wanted to eat them for DAYS but they do not reheat well. but godddd they were good)

ottolenghi's green pancakes with lime butter (these are SO easy. great for brunch but also make delicious additions to your lunch for a couple days after. also it's a perfect way to eat a pound of spinach and feel very virtuous about it when really you just ate delicious jalapeno-y scallion pancakes. the lime butter is great but it's a lot of work so i usually just top these with some sour cream mixed with a lil bit of lime zest & lime juice)

cauliflower shawarma with spicy tahini sauce (YUM! the tahini sauce as written was too bitter for me with the cholula mixed in. i think i'd try it with sriracha next time so it was a little sweeter. i also added chickpeas yum)

roasted cauliflower daal with chickpeas (my notes say this was "OUTTA THIS WORLD DELICIOUS" but also note that it will "really clean you out GI-wise" lol. lentils always have that effect on me though so ymmv. i added bell pepper, roasted the cauliflower first, cooked the lentils most of the way soft in the rice cooker instead of on the stove, and added two chopped serrano peppers with seeds to give it a lil extra kick. i would recommend halving the recipe if you are cooking for one as there were TONS of leftovers and my GI system could not handle being cleansed that many times lol)

pasta with corn, tomatoes, "onion-bacon," and basil (this method of preparing onions really should not taste like bacon and yet it sort of does????? this was a summer recipe i made multiple times for a range of audiences and it was a hit every time. originally from the weekday vegetarians)

creamy corn pasta (THIS HAS NO RIGHT BEING AS GOOD AS IT IS. IT'S SO SIMPLE AND YET IT'S THE BEST THING I'VE EVER TASTED I COULD EAT IT FOR DAYS. WE ATE IT ALL SUMMER)

ottolenghi's very full roasted veggie tart (it will take you hours to make and no time at all to consume but oh my god it's so good and SUCH a satisfying way to spend a long weekend afternoon. liz and i loved this so much we had to have a serious sitdown to discuss how we would divvy up the leftovers because we felt it could seriously damage our friendship if one of us ate all of it)

bombay burritos (the little sauces and things take a long time to make but you can prep a lot of the stuff a day or two in advance and gosh these are so tasty!! the curried mashed potatoes YUM)

honorable mentions:

ottolenghi's mango soba noodles (skip the eggplant i'd do tofu or something instead)

braised tofu with basil (i made this with a veggie-loaded stir fry and topped it with a fried egg)

this carrot cake (it took forever to make but it was the best carrot cake i've ever had and the only thing i'll ever make on my bday from here on out). she also has a pumpkin cake recipe that is so good and much simpler to make (no grating required)

momofuku's ginger scallion tofu with crispy coconut rice (the recipe is for a shrimp version but we made it with tofu and it was very yummy. i made this at a friend's house and it was so good i wanted to ask to take home some of the leftovers but decided that was too rude ahaha)

and then of course i gotta give a shoutout to my #1 comfort foods this year, SHAKSHUKA (my beloved) + a caprese sandwich with balsamic glaze served on really good bread.

[quibbs126]

if you’re still doing the fankids thing, how about chilirye ?

Jesus Christ, this request was from like, March. But I finally got around to him this is Pepper Bread Cookie

Also I feel like this isn’t the only request for chilirye I’ve gotten, but screw it, I’m too lazy right now to go through 100+ asks to find newer ones

So I originally started making Pepper Bread probably in March, but he was never more than a circle that was meant to be his head. But I was waiting for like an hour for a class, it was 10 minutes past when we were supposed to start, and only a few people had shown up, and we eventually just decided to leave, but in that time I was finally able to come up with something for Pepper Bread here

Anyways I’ll get into his name. So I believe his name is just based on bread that has pepper in it, since rye can be made into bread. Though his design is mostly based on this one specific picture I have saved in my Photos

Pepper Bread:

So today I finally had the idea for what to do with Pepper Bread, and that was to make him an innkeeper. Partially inspired by that idea I had for a Chili Cookie that’s an innkeeper (I do still want to draw her though). So that’s what I did with his outfit. The Innkeeper family from the Red Dragon update were pretty helpful as refs

Though I do also have to admit it makes his outfit more boring looking. Maybe he has some sort of adventuring outfit, maybe I’ll draw that someday

I basically just really wanted to make his hair look like the reference picture, which was the reason why I kept it in the first place. As in like, having orange hair with red flecks. Later on I got the idea of giving him red freckles, which are supposed to be like, pepper flakes in his dough, and I wasn’t sure I should keep the hair idea, but I did and I think it looks nice. It’s also why I gave him the braid, since that’s how the bread looked. It was going to be bigger and longer, but I couldn’t get it to look right, so it just stays on the shoulder now

I’m not sure if he looks too much like Chili Pepper, but oh well. I generally like his design, though I don’t think it’s what I envisioned. The one thing is that I couldn’t make his outfit look that exciting, but them’s the breaks I suppose

So let’s get into his character. So the main thing keeping me from making him is that I couldn’t figure out what to do with him, like specifically what his job was. Chili Pepper’s a thief, Rye’s a bounty hunter (or is she a sheriff? I’m not entirely sure), should I choose one of those for Pepper Bread? Or should I choose something else entirely? If so, how do I choose one that sounds in character for chilirye kid? One idea I had was to make him more straight laced than his moms (since let’s face it, Rye’s just as chaotic as Chili Pepper), and so an idea was to make him a sheriff, but I wasn’t sure. But then as I said, I had the idea to make him an innkeeper, and so yeah

Pepper Bread just wants to live a normal, honest life, so he got himself a tavern and opened it up, he’s gotten business (maybe not a lot, but at least enough to keep him afloat), and he’s pretty happy like this and treasures his inn. Generally speaking, he’s a friendly guy, someone reliable and honest. Though, if you cause trouble in his inn and mess things up, he will not hesitate to throw you out, or throw hands to do so. And while he may love his mas, if they cause trouble in his place, they get the same treatment

Also I imagine him with a strong Southern accent like Rye

Anyways yeah, I think that about covers it for Pepper Bread. Hope you enjoy!

[bucketspammer4life]

The boxers during halloween

(sees christmas decorations being put up) HALLOWEEN. HALLOWEEN!!! HALLOWEEN!!!

Glass Joe

- has a vampire costume and is giving out candy himself since "hes too old for all of this"

- buys those big family size packages of candy to give out, he likes them because he can snack on candy when halloween ends

- purposefully calls obvious costumes dumb stuff to get reactions out of people

- "oh yeah did you dress up as my moms curtains??"

- "IM A GHOST AND YOU ARE FRENCH!!"

- drinks a glass of tomato juice with his costume for extra realism

Von Kaiser

- He dressed up as the frankensteins monster, only for his students to dress up as him

- He gives out raisins and toothbrushes for halloween along with fruit (NOOO!!)

- does scary roaring sounds to scare people, only to get laughed at, thats what you get for giving out healthy food during halloween

- tries telling scary stories and gives up halfway through

Disco Kid

- dressed up as a fully functional disco ball (functional almost autocorrected to father LMAOO)

- goes out trick or treating himself but gets bored

- watching bad quality horror movies with Mac to laugh at them

- helps the kaisers students toilet paper his house for fun

- carving pumpkins with the others

King Hippo

- dressed up as a Hippo (how creative of you)

- does trick or treating with Disco kid, after disco got bored he went all out on his own and got a lot of candy

- He ate the pumpkin he was supposed to carve, no remains left, also totally unrelated: has anyone seen Joe's pumpkin carving knife?? That he was supposed to carve pumpkins with??

- his dentist will not be happy

Piston Hondo

- dressed up in sailor moon cosplay, rocking it as he should

- is the one giving out candy because imagine if a famous boxer dressed up as sailor moon came to your house for candy,seems like a fever dream

- helping Kaiser un-tp his house

- attempting to call bloody mary for the 10th time, She probably blocked your number already leave her before she gets a restraining order please

- sad that he has no one to match with

Bear Hugger

- dressed up as the lorax, matching with someone else as the greedler (im not spoiling it shut up) the squirrel is joining them dressed up as those bear things in the movie

- giving out entire bottles of maple syrup during halloween, people dont exactly hate it but its kind of a jumpscare seeing someone dressed up as a maple tree hand you maple syrup

- tried to sit on a pumpkin, only to break it instantly

- people keep assuming he dressed up as a Cheeto puff

Great Tiger

- dressed up as a fairy princess, yes hes a fairy, yes hes a princess and no he will not share his magic with you, jealous ass

- using his flying to his advantage by flying around with fairy wings on

- throwing "fairy dust" (glitter) around, people keep finding glitter in their food, costumes, socks and basically everywhere

Don Flamenco

- who'd you think was matching bear hugger? hes dressed up as the greedler and rocking it, how bad can he be anyways?

- loses 10 years from his life eveytime someone doesnt notice the refs he makes to the movie

- if anyone actually gets the ref he'll break out into song like hes in a musical (a punch out musical would go hard actually)

Aran Ryan

- a demon witch, matching with great tiger and also throwing "evil dust" (Hot pepper flakes) around, aran i think youre just assaulting people

- robbed Kaiser from his actual candy he hid away

- evil cackling as he attempts to fly on his broomstick, only to fall on his ass

- chasing Joe with the carving knife

Soda Popinski

- a fridge, he deadass just wore a entire fridge with soda in it

- pulling out random stuff from the fridge and handing out to people, Water? Drink up, tomatos? Here you go!!

- keeps getting stared at but in a good way

Bald Bull

- hes just in a bull onesie because he lost a bet, embarrased but he finds it comfy secretly, fell asleep in it at some point

- people keep calling him a cow and its driving him crazy

- "moo"

- "IM A BULL GOD FUCKING DAMN YOU ALL BLIND ASS BITCHES"

- watching movies and falling asleep

- carved a pumpkin with Joe and ended up laughing at it with him for 10 minutes

Super Macho Man

- himself, hes not giving out any free shout outs today

- fuck you super macho man

- carved himself into a pumpkin

- He cant keep getting away with this

Mr Sandman

- dressed up as a mummy since he didnt have enough time to think about it

- hes the only one who can actually scare people with and without his costume

- tried to put a pumpkin on his head, sad because it didnt fit

Extra

- kaisers students did the trenchcoat gag, dressef up as him and tried to buy a car with 10 dollars and a dance performance

- mrs bear dressed up as a princess and did her make up, looks stunning

- carmen dressed up as a flamingo

- soda has to pay back that fridge now

[canisbeanz]

Right, so this is an extremely random thing to rant about but Disney has a line of DVDs called "The Disney Classics Collection" that basically spans all of their main line of animated films and they all have these absolutely horrid shiny covers.

And basically, all of the 3d characters get off fine bc they just use the actual model from the movie but the 2d ones are so frequently horrifically off-model and weird looking, to the point where they almost look like bootlegs. Look at the state of these.

One of the ones I hate the most is Bambi, because it not only just looks bad as a one-time use on this specific DVD cover, but because this god-forsaken art is for some reason the go-to image for Bambi whenever they put him on anything now. it's not even a bit off model, it's "how did you physically manage that?" levels of wrong looking. I've always really liked Bambi as a character, even long before I actually saw the film, I think he's really cute. But I never buy anything Bambi related because aside from fuck Disney reasons, 9 out of 10 times it has this bloody image on it.

Because I am petty and have no guilt about calling official Disney images shite, I have attempted to fix it.

What is he looking at, why is he just staring blankly at the ground? why is he SO ORANGE? I turned down the red/yellow slider on mine like 40%? the darker shade of brown isn't nearly dark enough and why is it randomly lighter on his back? why are the bottom of his hooves rounded? he looks like he's standing on tik-taks. he's missing an entire stripe of colour under the dark patch on his back? why is part of his other eye visible from this side? deer have eyes on the side of their head, not the front, and even if he was an exception it still wouldn't make any sense based on how his camera-side eye looks. why does he only have one eyelash? why did they get rid of his eyebrows? why is his tail so low down? it doesn't make sense from an anatomy standpoint and also just doesn't look good, it makes his line of action weaker. why is there a tiny sliver of eyelid? it's like the artist couldn't decide if his eyes were partially closed or fully open. his spots are just in absolutely the wrong place, mine are a bit too bunched together but at least they're kinda where they're meant to be. and why oh why on earth does his darker part bulge out of his head like that?? it's not a hairstyle, it's a marking, it's not meant to look like wax melting over his face.

I don't even care about Disney stuff that much but I have a personal vendetta against these covers bc I volunteer at a charity shop and we get so many of these stupid covers and they always have all the shiny stuff flaking off everywhere and no one buys them bc they're ugly!

[moopsy-daisy]

Make Your Own Cosmetics, Get What You Actually Want

Once you've been in zero waste, eco friendly, solarpunk/lunarpunk circles for a while, it's easy to forget the steps you took when you started. There are lots of DIY projects I've been doing for 10+ years now, and I keep doing them because they work (for me). Yet, when I sit back and think "am I doing enough?" I always gloss over the myriad things that have become part of my everyday life.

Making these things won't save the environment, but you'll get products that meet your needs on your terms, will save you money, and you won't have to worry about a company discontinuing your favorites. Plus, it seems like a lot less packaging to just buy a brick of beeswax and toss in some kitchen stuff you already had to make makeup.

Henna

I got really lucky, I always wanted red hair and henna is a natural dye that only comes in red. Well, more of a coppery tone. But, here's the other cool thing: the henna process is anti-fungal and controls dandruff. Half the time, I remember to color my hair because my scalp starts getting itchy 6+ weeks later and I start to get flakes. Coloring my hair takes care of my scalp and I don't need dandruff shampoo to keep it healthy. It's cost-effective, buying high quality henna for a year's worth of color (for my length and thicc hair) is about $60 for 18-months' of materials. I mix it when I need it, and keep the powder in the freezer. Pro-tip, if you or your partner don't like the grassy, hay-like smell of henna, add cardamom or ginger powder to the mix. It doesn't change the color but it'll knock down the scent.

I learned everything I needed to know about Henna for Hair here: http://hennaforhair.com and buy through Catherine's store because I know I'm getting real, quality henna powder.

Oh and a cloth wrap for your hair will let you keep the henna covered without wasting plastic wrap every time you redo your roots. I've been using the same 'turbie twist' wraps for years now. I made them from old t-shirts and they're stained as fuck. Who cares? This is basically their only job.

Carmine Lip Color

No, it isn't vegan. Yes, it's made of bugs. It's also a spectacular color, the insects aren't abused in the process of gathering or raising. They're actually parasites on nopal cactus, they have a simple niche and serve it well. I learned this lip stain recipe from Humblee & Me, and have found that the anti-bacterial doesn't seem to be necessary, ymmv. A 2.5 gram sample pack of carmine from TKB has lasted me almost a year and I wear this almost daily. I find that the glycerin really helps keep my lips from drying out too badly, so I wear my lip stain even when I'm not planning on being seen by other people. I spend about $20 on lip color for a year and that's including the bottles I use to store it (tiny eyedroppers work best imo) and the glycerin. Not quite zero waste but darn close.

Note: I'm still trying to find a simple recipe for black goth lipstick that I like. So far, my attempts have had a nasty texture and aren't worth the trouble.

Eyebrow Fill

My favorite brand of eyebrow liner discontinued the best color I ever found, so I decided to make my own. Beeswax, cocoa powder, activated charcoal, and almond oil made a little pot of eyebrow fill that suits my needs beautifully. Go super light on the charcoal until you know you've got the color you want. My brows are pretty dark but not fully black, so I do a dark chocolate sort of shade. I think I made my last batch about 11 months ago and it's still half full. I use it daily, apply with an angled brush, and it's never given me breakouts or anything. I don't even wash it off, because I am lazy.

Body Powder/Dry shampoo

Growing up in California, I didn't need this stuff. Living in Oregon? Summer would be awful without body powder. It's also a nice way to have a fragrance on. Pour your favorite perfume (I love Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab oils) onto a cotton ball, put that ball in a jar with a bunch of corn starch. Shake. Leave it for a month. You now have scented body powder. It's a decent dry shampoo, too, I just brush it into my dark hair and it disappears.

Tooth Powder

There is NOTHING wrong with using conventional toothpaste if it meets your needs. I have particular reasons for using tooth powder. These include hating the taste of most toothpaste and needing to avoid fluoride because of my particular thyroid condition. (Fluoride isn't bad for everyone! It isn't ideal for everyone. Figure out what you need!) I make my own tooth powder, it works well enough for me and I don't hate brushing my teeth like I used to. 1 part baking soda, 1 part bentonite clay, some ground cloves. Mix it up, keep in a glass jar (metal will bond with the clay, bad things happen, this is why we use glass or plastic for storage). $20 of materials = LOADS of tooth powder.

Cutting Hair

It's way easier than you think. I cut my own hair and I do a graduated bob which is a little more complex than most at-home cuts. I taught myself. I use decent shears (don't use scissors) and a Wahl hair trimmer set. Learn this skill on yourself, and when people find out you can do hair, they'll come to you for their own needs. Great way to provide mutual aid (one of my parents is trans and getting haircuts in a salon would be extremely stressful for her, so I cut her hair and save her money and suffering). You could also do skill trades! I trade haircuts for massages from a massage therapist friend, for example.

Protip: Dust yourself with body powder before cutting hair, it makes the little shards of cut hair way less prone to sticking to you. You'll still want a shower but it'll just be less icky.

[punsmaster69]

10/NOV/20XX

"Sans."

"Sans."

"SANS."

"SANS, STOP THROWING ME, GODDAMN IT!!"

"We're not getting ANYWHERE like this!"

"you look like you need a hand."

"I don't!"

"I REALLY don't!!"

"....."

"alphys, stop grabbing me."

"It's only fair."

"c'mon. we're not getting 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 like this."

"Oh, shut UP!!"

i'm at undyne and alphys' place, playing co-op games.

(i'm really helpful, as you can tell.)

papyrus was playing with us, but he apparently made plans with flowey.

sorry, 'flowery'.

that's what paps calls him.

must be a nickname of sorts,

'cuz when paps is real serious, he'll say 'flowey'.

..which is to say, almost never.

that weed's got a big soft spot for papyrus.

and tori.

and despite the squabbles, i think he really cares about frisk, too.

——

"Undyne..."

"Let me-"

"I'm gonna make this jump by myself if it's the last thing I do!!"

"Y-you're losing all your lives.."

"I'm GONNA make it!"

she did not.

i'm already out myself, after undyne got pissed and threw me into a pit a few times.

now it's just alphys vs. the clock.

"GO, Alphy, GO!!"

——

"YEAAAAHHH!!!!"

i whispered, "(epic dub.)"

alphys slowly turned to me with a look of disgust.

"(You are... so cringe.)"

"(you're just jealous of my hip-ness. i'm totally epic.)"

"(Stop??)"

——

"Yo, Sans."

"Wanna have one with us before you leave?"

undyne shook a cup noodle.

"sure."

been a while since i had ramen for dinner, since paps usually cooks. stopped having them as often because they're not really substantial enough for me anymore.

oh, to go back to being a teen who could live off noodles forever.

——

sometime while we were eating, it really started coming down.

"When'd it start raining THIS hard?"

"You might have to stay here until it clears, Sans."

"if i pull my hood up i'll be fine getting home."

"Dude, no way we're letting you go out like that."

alphys squinted out the window.

"It's getting dark, too. You're not gonna be able to see a thing!"

they've got a point, but paps is gonna be worried.

——

"STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE!!"

"ok"

"i am"

"did you get home before the rain?"

"NO, I'M AT MS. TORIEL'S."

"ANY IDEA WHEN IT'LL CLEAR?"

"looks like it might be all night."

"SO IT'S AN IMPROMPTU SLEEPOVER, NOW?"

"guess so"

"DO THEY HAVE SPARE BLANKETS AND WHATNOT FOR YOU TO USE?"

"lemme ask"

"ok"

"one pillow"

"but no sheets"

"THAT'S.. NOT GREAT."

"eh"

"good enough"

"how's it for you at tori's?"

"MS. TORIEL IS DEFINITELY ALWAYS PREPARED."

"HER COUCH IS QUITE COMFORTABLE!"

"BY THE"

"huh"

"SORRY. I HIT SEND TOO EARLY."

"I MEANT:

BY THE WAY, DID YOU EAT ALREADY?"

"cup noodles"

he took a long time to respond.

"HM."

"what"

"IS THAT REALLY NUTRITIONAL ENOUGH?"

"survived off the stuff before"

"AND YOU WERE ALWAYS TERRIBLY SHAKY, BEFORE."

"if that was all i'd eaten"

"....IS THAT ALL YOU'VE EATEN?"

"the cereal and coffee this morning"

"UGH."

"I AGREED TO CEREAL ON THE CONDITION THAT YOU HAD SOMETHING MORE SUBSTANTIAL LATER."

"corn flakes are substantial"

"NOT*"

"i'll lie"

"lice"

"libe"

"live"

"jeez"

"sorry"

"WHAT HAPPENED THERE??"

"fuzzy vision+hands stuff"

"WHAT."

"maybe i stared too hard at the screen or somethin"

"AND THE HANDS??"

"dunno"

"OKAY."

"THAT'S."

"I WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOUR POOR DIETARY CHOICES TODAY, THEN."

"I SEE YOU TYPING AND IF IT'S AT ALL REMINISCENT OF A 'IT'S FINE' I WANT YOU TO STOP."

"...REALLY?"

"OKAY. OKAY."

"SO YOU'RE:"

"RUNNING ON CAFFEINE, SUGAR, AND CARBS."

"SLEEPING WITH NO BLANKETS DURING A COLD RAINSTORM."

"SUFFERING VARIOUS HEALTH COMPLICATIONS."

"AND I'M... THERE FOR NONE OF IT."

"DON'T EVEN SAY IT."

"ok"

"bro?"

"you still there?"

"..HOLD ON. GIVE ME A MINUTE."

"what's going on?"

"....paps???"

——

oh my god.

really papyrus, what the hell?

now you're worrying 𝘮𝘦.

he marched through that storm out there just to bring me home?

"Not even an umbrella..?"

"I.. DIDN'T THINK ABOUT IT."

"HOLD ON, LET ME GO OUT AND GET A BIG ONE SO SANS-"

"Like hell you are!!"

"I HAVE TO TAKE SANS HOME!"

"you're soaked, paps..."

"A LITTLE RAIN CAN'T STOP THE GREAT PAPYRUS!"

——

the weather eventually let up enough for us to borrow umbrellas and walk home.

i'm still worried about him, though. he sat in those cold, soaked clothes for a while.

says he feels fine...

but he's been trembling a little since he came in.

"ONCE I WARM UP MORE, I'LL BE A-OKAY!"

——

"ISN'T IT TOO LATE FOR YOU TO BE WRITING ANY MORE? ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE NOT FEELING GREAT!"

"paps, you are-"

"PLEASE GO TO BED. STOP WORRYING ABOUT ME!"

"i'm only going if you do."

"..ALRIGHT, FAIR ENOUGH. I'LL GO AS WELL."

"goodnight, bro."

"GOODNIGHT, SANS!!"

"throw on a couple more blankets tonight, ok? maybe put on a sweater."

"I DON'T NEED-"

he shivered.

"......."

"WILL DO."

[eppysboys]

Tim Bruckner, creator of the artwork on Ringo Starr’s landmark 1973 album Ringo, interview with The Beatles Bible in Febuary 2015:

Did you work closely with Ringo on the cover concept, or were you given free rein? What was your design brief?

They already had the images of Ringo leaning against the giant letters, à la Elvis. In the original pictures, Ringo’s shirt is blue. They had it retouched to make it red. There was no concept at the time. I put together 10 concept sketches and they picked the one with him on stage with a balcony full of people. There are 26 portraits in the balcony. The rest are people I invented.

I was working on the design at the R or R offices at night. When I needed inspiration, I’d take a walk through the London streets and come back to work inspired. I didn’t meet Ringo until I went to England so I don’t know what his involvement was beforehand.

Ringo’s cover sidekick, the cherub, happened after I got home. Having met the man and spent some time with him, I understood how important humor was to him and his circle of friends. The cherub just seemed like an natural extension of that part of his character, funny and a little mischievous. Was the cover an intended homage to Sgt Pepper, with the faces in the background?

I’d never intended it to be connected to Sgt Pepper at all. The only directive I got was their desire to have the musicians who played on the album represented on the cover in some way. Klaus Voormann, who did the art for Revolver, had designed and completed a piece line art for Ringo’s cover. Ringo decided against using it.

It was never used. As far as I know I have the only copy, although I assume Klaus has the original.

The motto “Duit on mon dei” (‘do it on Monday’) appears at the top of the Ringo sleeve, and was also a Harry Nilsson album title. Was it Ringo’s stipulation to have it on his record sleeve, and was it a regular in-joke at the time?

This was Harry’s invention. He wanted to make it a joke on a Latin motto. I think the only reason it got on the cover was they thought it was funny and asked that I include it. Did you know any of the Beatles prior to 1973? Did you consider yourselves friends, or was it more of a professional relationship?

I’d not met any of the Beatles prior to working on Ringo’s album cover. Over the course of a couple of years, I got to know Harry and Ringo pretty well. More so Harry. He’d commissioned a couple of pieces of art from me. He lived in an apartment on the corner of La Cienega and Sunset, and I visited him there a number of times.

During that time, I lived in El Segundo, a beach community outside of Los Angeles. There was a silent movie theater down the block from me and Harry and his current girlfriend came over. We had a few drinks and all walked down the block to see Lon Chaney in The Phantom of the Opera, with the hand colored section. It was the first time either one of us had seen it. He was an intelligent, caring, funny and talented man with a penchant for things that were not good for him.

I was friendly with Ringo but I wouldn’t say we were friends. I was lucky enough to have been invited to his house while I was in England, where I met George Harrison, and his lovely wife Pattie. I’d met John Lennon a number of times while he was producing Harry’s Pussy Cats album. He was always kind and patient with me. I have two significant memories of John.

I was supposed to come to the Malibu house to give Harry and Ringo updates on Harry and Ringo’s Night Out. I was eager and anxious and got to the house mid morning. I didn’t know at the time that morning, for the house residents started after noon. I was sitting in at the kitchen table, waiting.

One of the house staff offered me breakfast. A bowl of cereal. I poured out a bowl full of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes and was just about to pour the milk when John came in, sat down, smiled, looked at me, the bowl of cereal and said, “Ah, sitting on a cornflake.” Perfect.

One late afternoon, I think it was a Sunday, I was sitting on the couch. John came in and sat on the chair opposite me. I don’t remember what started the conversation, but he made a point to tell me that women were people too. They thought, felt, reasoned, reacted, created, explored, angered, were saddened, equal to that of any man. Often more so.

I was young and not very evolved. He must have seen something in me that prompted his observation. But that was one of those light bulb moments. I thought about what my attitude had been to the women in my life and realized it needed adjusting. His words altered my relationships profoundly for the better.

One of the things I learned during that time was how transitory your relationships are, especially with famous people. I saw it over and over, people who were near the inner circle desperately trying to hold onto their place in the mistaken belief that fame rubs off. It doesn’t, at least not in those days. The famous have their own friends, their own lives and their own sense of who they are and what they need to get done. If you can contribute to any part of it, you’re lucky and it can be hugely fun. The key is to recognize when it’s time to move on. And move on.

One of the saddest things I witnessed was a person who had been part of the celebrity society but was not as relevant as they once were and the desperation they went through just to stay where they were. When you hear a celebrity see a person coming and they say, “Oh, it’s her/him,” as if the Grim Reaper just stepped into the room, it’s kind of a heartbreak. But you can’t say anything. Partly, because they don’t believe you. They see it as a way to move them aside and move yourself in.