#I remember when they posted those Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[agirlwithglam]

🌟 become your dream girl before 2025! 🌟

THIS WILL *ACTUALLY* CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

do you know how many people are waiting until next year to glow up and actually start to become their dream self? now just think, if you started now, before 2025, how far you would be. how much more skills and knowledge you would have. you're literally getting a head start. so what are you doing dilly-dallying until 2025? heres your guide to ending this year accomplishing everything you need to and starting 2025 with everything you need.

in this post i will include mindset shifts, how to become a better person, actionable advice, actually becoming a new person <3

👑know what you want.

who do you want to become at the end of this year? what does your dream girl look like? what kind of body does she have? her clothes? who are the people she hangs out with on a daily basis- friends?

create a very clear version in your head and use pinterest to show photos of what your goals are- for ex: girls at the gym, journalling, writing, studying, reading, learning, walking, with friends, spending time outside, going swimming, playing sports, doing a skill/ hobby.

you can also find an idol/ an inspiration- a youtuber, influencer, parent, anyone who you look up to and want to somewhat have a similar life like them. (for ex: thewizardliz, tam kaur) whatever is important to you this goes hand in hand with the next point:

👑goals.

any unfinished projects, any goals you said you'd do in the beginning of the year, get them all down on paper. if you've finished any of them, great!- tick them off. but if you haven't then its time to lock in. pick the ones that are most important to you. that you know that achieving these will 100% get you closer to your goal. doing this makes sure you get rid of the ones that you think are "productive" when in reality they just help you procrastinate.

finish any unfinished projects or books you have before the new year begins because 2025 is about bringing in new, fresh opportunities and things. for me personally, i have a few crochet projects that i want to finish before the end of this year so i can start the new year with nothing old from the year before!

👑cutting.

you are going to be becoming a new person- new mindset, new values, new perception on life, etc. the people in your life currently probably won't align with this new version of you. because if the people around you still only know the old you, your growth won't happen because it will feel extremely unnatural without the right people around you. this means you're going to have to decide whether you are letting any of your friends go. if they don't serve you or make you feel happier or bring in any value to your life, im sorry but its time to cut them off.

but of course if you actually have good, kind, loving friends who grow with you and support you all the way, keep them. the goal is to remove the people who don't serve your highest self. not remove the people who you know will be there for you.

but along with this, if you notice that those people are acting a bit more weirdly/ strangely now that you're improving- giving you backhanded compliments, talking about you behind your back, or just giving you a weird vibe in general, trust your gut. those people don't want to see you going to a higher place where you're thriving- keeping them in your life can be terrible for your highest good.

remember that doing this doesn't mean that you're not going to get better because BETTER ALWAYS COMES. god will give you more people who you couldn't have ever dreamed could be so amazing. so never keep toxic people in your life out of fear that you'll be alone forever. (remember: 8 billion people in the world.)

👑mindset.

dont wait to change your mindset only once you achieve the dream body or the best grade- start now. people can take away everything from you but they can't take away your mindset, skills, and knowledge. here are some mindset shifts to develop:

the abundance mindset. know that everything happens for your highest and greatest good only! everything will work out in the end for you because God hasn't put you on this earth to suffer. if you are religeous (God) or spiritual (the universe) or even believe theres a higher faith, why on earth would you willingly believe that your purpose here is to have a bad time? obstacles will come your way and you will make bad decisions and mistakes. but all these jsut contribute to the person you are today and the person who you'll be in the future!

i will make it. believe in your vision and yourself so fiercely that you know in your bones that you will achieve your goals. you will travel the world and discover new places, you will get to retire your parents, you will get to buy expensive bags for your mom, you will be that rich sister/daughter/ wife, you will help people around the whole world, you will have people around you who love and care for you, you will achieve whatever dream you had since you were a kid and whatever dream you have right now. you will you will you will! know this so strongly but also know that i will achieve there one day, but i also am so blessed and grateful for the life i have right now! i have so many privileges and such an amazing life that i would never trade away for anything.

growth mindset if you fail, IT IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. please stop being afraid of failing, be afraid of never trying!! you have no idea how freeing failing is because once you do, then you'll never have that "what if" in the back of your mind, never have that small voice asking what could have happened if you had done that thing. so if you do fail, perfect! that means that you won't waste any more time wondering what would have happened. having a growth mindset means that you know you're human and you'll make mistakes, but that doesnt make you a bad person and it doesn't take away your capability to still accomplish your goals. if you fail be able to brush it off, and keep trying again and again. Thomas Edison had 1000 failed attempts to make the light bulb. yet he learnt from what didn't work, took that into consideration, then tried again. and again. and again. and now? your probably sitting in a room with light that you have because he persisted in his goal!

stay positive always have a positive outlook and perspective of life. look at the beauty and what you have instead of what you lack. feel happy joyful energy vibrate through you everyday. do things that just make you a more positive person in general! feeling happier makes you look 100x more attractive and will change the way you interact with the world!!

👑be a better person.

new year new you right? so its time you up level the way you talk and treat others. because the goal isn't to be A b*tch, the goal is to be THAT b*tch! so going around being rude isn't going to do anything for you. being kind however- having manners, checking up on people, asking how their day was, being charismatic, etc- thats what can get you so much more opportunities! you're going to be kind, but not a people pleaser- ofc prioritise yourself always but also at the same time- if you have made a commitment to be somewhere for someone at a certain time, honor that commitment. be the friend you wish you had.

being mean to everyone just because you were hurt by someone else is not it. yes, so you were hurt. grow, evolve, heal. you're stronger than this. you're stronger than you think. you can overcome anything and you can become an even better person, capable of loving fully and wholly!

misc tips:

change what you consume. start watching thewizardliz, tam kaur on youtube. have an inspiration/ idol to look up to in life.

workout. i dont care if its not one of your goals to have a fit body, but don't workout for that. workout because you love yourself. because its actually proven to make you happier, because you deserve a healthy, fully functioning body.

DRINK WATER. do you know how many benefits something as simple as that has? clear skin, unchapped lips, better digestive health, weight management, better health, feel more alert and energized, better for immune system, increases brain power, eliminate toxins, ETC ETC!

have a morning routine that literally sets yourself up for success. stimulate your mind with reading self help, learn something, study, focus on a skill, do something that makes your mind active.

journal & check in with yourself.- document your progress! write about how you felt after everyday. did you feel esp happy during anything? do you feel satisfied at the end of the day? or do you find that your day made you feel tired and drained? do you feel regret and wished you did more at the end of the day?

diary- links with the earlier point. document the day. you can write about it, or what i also like to do is video myself yapping to the camera. talk about whatever you want and let your mind wander free!

you are that it girl! dress the part, smell good, make yourself feel so good that you just can't help but feel like you can conqure anything!!

make sure you're consistently reminded of your goals. what do you want? why do you want to achieve it? reminding yourself of your goals will actually motivate you and make you stop procrastinating. for me its that i don't want any old projects or books having to continue into the new year so i've made a plan that will definitely get it done before the next year!

[majimemegoro]

Kamurocho dashboard simulator

🏵 tojoc0re Follow

nishiki was 27 years old???

🏵 tojoc0re Follow

he shouldnt have been made a patriarch the dragon of dojima would of been better at it :/

( 420 notes )

📸 daily-mac-photos Follow

#kamurocho #tokyo #tenkaichi street #japan landscapes #photographers of japan #travel #cyberpunk #not as zesty as my usual subject matter but #lmao pls reblog this i almost got beat up by color gang members taking this photo

( 79 notes )

🦢 chinpiraposting Follow

my hungry ass can't be left alone with staminam x i suck those bad boys down like juice

( 9,839 notes )

🚲 wackycyclist Follow

.

#the entitlement i see on this site sometimes is disgusting #y'all will just post about having easy access to bicycles??? #some of us had our bicycles wrecked in fights??? #vent #do not rb

( 3 notes )

🗡 koinodiscoqueen Follow

CALLOUT FOR SHIMANO FUTOSHI

I've talked a lot about this already on this blog, but I want to have everything collected in one post so next time some dipshit with a hannya hand icon slides into my inbox to call me a liar I can just link to this post. tl;dr shimano futoshi made my cousin feel realy unsafe while she was shaving his head, and here are the receipts:

Keep reading

( 38 notes )

🚡 matsushigeboss-deactivated30190547

fr we need to stop letting twunks be in charge of anything

( 3 notes )

🍜 i<3kazama Follow

i stg if one more of you tells me the old yakuza way is dying I KNOW ALREADY shut UP

#feel like pure shit just want cold noodles

( 1,930 notes )

📖 kamuroscamwatch Follow

today's scam: Aha water (again)

Was walking down pink street when I got stopped by a barker who promised that all my problems could be solved..., long story short, anyone remember Aha water from the 80s? Well, they rebranded as AHA water (subtle, I know) and they''re back at it. I stalked the people who make it and they literally collected puddle water from the champion district to put in the concoction. I didn't really feel well after drinking it, but the overall experience was good because they totally tapped into that nostalgia. Overall a really solid scam. Stay safe out there kamurocho.

4/5 stars

#scamblr #aha water #1980s #scams #scam rating #safety #scam review

( 12 notes )

👺 hannya69 Follow

batting center is a normal place to get nastay in reblog if u agree

( 58,274 notes )

🚗 thepocketcricuitfighter Follow

Does anyone here still play pocket circuit? :)

( 0 notes )

📈 reglarsalaryman Follow

wtf this guy just ripped off his shirt in the street and started whaling on some guys?? everyone else started clapping and cheering and I just went along with it lmao 😅 am I missing something????

#this is right after he sang a song and saved a couple from jumping off a building #he was glowing too.... #average night in kamurocho

( 85 notes )

🐛 majimaunderlingbaddiebracket Follow

ULTIMATE HOTTEST MAJIMA UNDERLING BADDIE TOURNAMENT FINALS!!!!

🔘 shinji-deactivated30190303

here y'all go again pitting two bad bitches against each other

🌀 jingusforehead Follow

🌊 thugbaby Follow

everyone who voted minami is an arson apologist #nishidasweep

( 4,271 notes )

🔥 businessboi Follow

fuck my job so much. everyone manifest an attack on millennium tower so I can go home.

🔥 businessboi Follow

by talos this can't be happening

( 38,386 notes )

[namelessdumbass]

Rite Here Rite Now

It was amazing and funny. Copia girlies and boys fucking won!

I expected different outcome, tbh. Tobias managed to surprise me and also made me a tiny bit sad (reasons will be explained in the spoilers below).

The film consists of like 95% of concert footage and 5% of off stage/plot stuff. The quality of sound and editing is just 🤌 I expected the live of Twenties to be good and gosh Ghost delivered. And Mummy Dust...Tobias let Mary Goore out! But i honestly prefer Terzo's version (CaD) better. Sorry not sorry haha. Ghouls/Ghoulettes footage. Everyone who loves them will be very veeeery well fed!

Dance Macabre live...i was'nt wrong when i called it a satanic gay party 😁

The movie is worth watching and i do hope Ghost releases it as soon as possible for all those who were not able to go.

The spoiler free review ends here. Don't read further if you don't want to spoil it for yourself. And please, don't copy them and paste it everywhere for the sake of ruining other people's fun! Seriously, don't fucking do that!

If you accidently clicked here, don't worry! spoilers will be below and you still have a chance to avoid them :)

Alriiiiight:

Movie starts with Saltarian who tells fans to record for the first 2 minutes, to show how happy they are etc and posted a qr code for fans to upload those recordings. I guess it will be put up on RHRN website. We'll see. There were also photos of fans who attended LA ritual. I fucking loved the person who showed up in a giant Plushia suit. I LOLed! Then fans were asked to put down the phones and enjoy the movie. The beginning was narrated Star Wars kinda style (a little bit) with the small recap of the chapters and about Copia's worries that he might die. And yes, it literally began in space lol. The movie is basically is like what we saw in small snippets Ghost posted earlier. Plot mixed with a really good show.

And the plot: -Short footage of Copia and Ghouls arriving. ALmost the whole set was the same as any other concert from Re-Imperatour + a few awesome exceptions. -Dews does that annoying thing with guitar, Rain stops him, takes his pick and throws it into the crowd and Dew...he freaking showed him YouSuck sticker on the backside of his guitar. Peak Dew moment! -Copia asked the right question about the Clery. He also does not quite understand what it does, why and where it goes. I suppose Tobias decided to thicken the Ghost lore a bit and will have more clarity in the nearest future. -Remember when Copia jumped at the end of the Watcher in the Sky? He ended up in one of those stage boxes (for equipment or something) and is taken to the stage B. While he's carried to it by Kevin he has a chat with Nihil's ghost. Nihil says he recorded not 2, but 3 songs. That probably means that we'll hear a new one. (UPD: the new song we heard during the credits, "The Future is a Foreign Land" is Nihil's 3rd song! Confirmed by Tobias himself in a new interview). He also tells Copia to breath in deep and then farts. -On the Stage B Copia sings "If You Have Ghosts". 3 Ghoulettes played piano and violins and the 4th one did the haunting ghost-like opera vocals. It was beatiful. Copia kissed her hand. -He then wore boxing robe and went next to crowd. Almost the whole scene was shown in the trailer. -Btw, remember that silly moment when Nihil's eyes were crossing? Well, Kevin was also included in that staring contest. -Twenties live. The skeletons, the performance and one of those skeletons who crawled between Dew's legs...that's hot. -Nihil calls Copia "son". Copia calls Nihil "Dad". Cardi will insult him later, don't worry. -Nihil/Seestor cartoon during MOAC. Yes, that's when Sis hit him with the car. Basically it's what happens after "Kiss the Go Goat" mv. Sister leaves and Nihil runs after her. "I'll never let you go". They end up kissing in a coffin on a graveyard , later Nihil wakes up naked in a bed in a motel and we see Sister leave. -There was a moment in a movie when we see Ashley (stage crew) bring Copia a new pair of shoes and put the on on his feet. Tobias, goddammit what the hell was that? :D -Seestor was a in wheelchair all the time -She and Nihil encouraged Copia throughout the whole movie and gave him a piece of advice. -About the baloon from the poster. Copia flies on it after finishing the set...or he imagined that because a few moments later after Nihil/Seestor flashbacks he ends up on the floor and watches Seestor die. All of the Ghouls and Ghoulettes also stood right next to her. -Copia has a twin brother -Copia didn't die and became the head the Clergy (Father Imperator or something like this). He found out about his new position from a letter Seestor left for him. -New song during credits (credits show dictators, assassinations, wars and the use of nuclear war). Years 1984 and 2024 mentioned. The song is not heavy. -Ghouls/Ghoulettes real names mentioned in the credits -Funny post credit scene with Copia. He had no piant on and had a new cool drip (with black jacket and red and black cross). Seestor is also a Ghost now. Tobia's children cameo. They're also Ghosts. -Papa V is teased the same way Copia was teased in a chapter 1. They even used the same music (Pro Memoria). No face reveal. Either he will be revealed in new Chapters or at some point during the new tour???

-aaaand my biggest disappointment: no footage of Primo, Secondo and Terzo. Literally ZERO.

I mean, Nihil is a Ghost, Seestor also became a Ghost, even Tobias' children made a cameo as Ghosts, but nothing for previous Papas? Really?! The same could have been done for them, but i guess Tobias doesn't care about them anymore :( And it hurts. I know that's my fault that i had so many expectations and hopes, but holy shit :( As a newbie who never saw previous Papas, i'm so sad i'll never get a chance to see them and there won't be any new footage of them. Being Terzo widow is so hard. Guess that's why i'm a bit salty Copia lives (sorry, guys, i like him, but i also hate him haha)

And yes, as it turned out the twins theory from Square Hammer was true...but not for Terzo 😭

I enjoyed the movie nevertheless. It's fun and kinda gives you an opportunity to see the band "live" if you've never been to a ritual before. And yes, the movies was'nt just about Papa IV and his fate, i believe it was also Tobias' message for us to enjoy the life rite here rite now! As i said, Copia's girlies and boys truly fucking won. Congrats, lads, your Papa lives and will live! I bet that feels amazing. Thanks for reading! P.S. since you know the plot, don't spoil it for the others please.

[accio-victuuri]

for some reason this second section of songs are making cpfs go wild 👀

unlike the first set, which i think could have their cpns of their own but was really more of social/life commentary on xz’s side. these next ones, are superior. atleast to me. we don’t have the 3rd set yet so i can still be wrong. and i mean sweets aside, the 3 songs released today are instant favorites. i expect people to make bjyx fanvids with lighthouse as the bgm please do not disappoint me. lol.

what we first noticed was xz posting the qq links to the songs using a photo (p1). in it, you clearly see the hands of the watch point to 10 and 5 which is his bday. it made us remember all those times they showed off their watch with questionable numbers visible ( p3 and p4 because xz is not subtle at all ) . coincidentally, a 10:05 timed watch (p2) was also seen in wyb’s most recent NYE performance.

shut up you two. please. 😬

the title track of this section — DRIFTING’s concept sounds like it’s someone exploring an unfamiliar environment. which made is think of wyb’s recent show exploring the unknown. the choice of words and imagery he wants to show is also interesting. take note that xz wrote this song.

Lying on an island and waking up

The top of the cliff, tear it off and go with the flow.

while it’s pretty obvious that this means more than going out in the wilderness in the literal sense when you take the song as a whole — the fact that it fits what wyb has recently done is 😏. can someone please make a video too of ETU with drifting as the background. it would be perfect. thank you. to me, this is xz drawing inspiration from wyb’s experience and combining that to his own “exploration” and drifting in this world.

NOW TIME TO TALK ABOUT THE TRACK LIGHTHOUSE. Personally, it’s my fave and i think it’s the most romantic and bjyx-y of them all. 💕

first of all the imagery of a lighthouse and the sense of it being that only light you see amidst the storm. that no matter what happens, he can look at that. the timing of yibo posing with a light for GRA is making me overthink too. lol. also wyb’s album cover for twenty was a light bulb thing. that kind of symbolism really speaks to them.

and as for the lyrics lemme just leave this select lines for us to all cry about ok?

For whom to move forward? Even if there are thorns under my feet, I'll stay with you till the end.

Where is the storm now? I go against the wind I'm barefoot and go through the crowd…. An island in the dark, We must also go against the tide.

Run towards the lighthouse in the darkness. Even if it rains heavily, Let's go, let's go, we have to go home. Just live hard like this. I only see the lighthouse

The lighthouse in my heart. It will never go out.

songs can be interpreted in different ways and can go in a totally different direction from what the lyricist intended but i am understanding this in a romantic sense. not the cutesy kind of romance, but the one that has hardships, is not easy, but you know that you have each other. the lighthouse in his heart will never go out. in reality, their life is not easy. but they are stronger together. even if there are thorns under my feet i’ll stay with you till the end.

I CAN’T EVEN. AHHHHHHH 😭😭😭😭

and oh, talking about the rain and going home. more on the going home part, people are bringing back favorite line among cpfs from an LRLG contribution. supposedly said by yibo.

When I called, I said it was fine, but as I talked, it became like

🟢 : I want to go home. Come and take me home.

I was kinda nervous for track 8 cause that Bo. LOL. the song is also good but i don’t see much CPN from it. or maybe not yet. lol. i just hope they get to have time where they can have night walks together 🌙

-END.

[gavisfanta]

hii i love ur story's sm☺️☺️

but i was wondering if you can do a instagram with gavi? with the story!!☺️☺️

INSTA FEED - GAVI

summary: you tried your hardest to hide it, but your dog gave it away

warnings: noneee

@yourinsta

Finally back in Barcelona 🫶🏻🫶🏻 missed my home

liked by random and 829,829 others.

random: i hope you enjoyed your spain roadtrip❤️❤️

random: youre so pretttyyyy

random: girly i love you but Colleen Hoover is not it.

random: i think it ends with us is good

random: i hope ill see you

random: where is that?

random: she said it in the caption, barcelona

random: no but where in barcelona

random: barceloneta i think

yourbestie: I MISS YOU

yourinsta: I MISS YOU TOO

random: so cuteee

-

@yourinsta

feliz dia de Saint Jordi!!!!! 💞💞

liked by yourbestie and 299,619 others.

random: that bear is so adorable😍

yourbestie: who's that hot chick in that first pic??? 😍😍😍

yourinsta: awww❤️

random: can we switch bodies?

random: frr

random: ouuu who are those gifts from...

random: 😍😍

random: youre so prettyyyy

random: her and gavi would actually fit together as a couple

random: I SEE IT I SEE IT

-

@yourinsta

do you guys think he will be mad at me??? 🫠

liked by random 508,729 and others.

yourbestie: yeah honey i dont know but that perfume costs 200 euros....

yourinsta: its okay... ill just tell him that it was an accident...😬😬😬

random: WHO IS HE?!??!?!?!

random: okay but her pics>>>

random: i wish i was you

random: im atill not giving up about my theory with her and Gavi

random: im with you

random: YOU. ARE. SO. PRETTY.

random: 😍😍😍

random: can you check the dm i sent you??

-

@yourinsta

< BCN 3

liked by pablogavi and 999,629 others.

random: love the fit girly

random: i was there yesterday

random: LOVE THE PICS

random: where is your jacket from??

random: THE FACT THAT GAVI LIKE THIS.

random: MY THEORY IS BECOMING THE TRUTH....

random: girl i get that you post gavi cause.....

random: im tired of hiding how fine he is

random: dont hide it. 🤷‍♀️

ferrantorres: 🤣

random: lmaoo what ferran??

-

@yourinsta

i love acting like a tourist and going into all the souvenir shops

liked by pablogavi and 729,829 others.

random: I LOVE BARCELONAAA

random: GAVI LIKED AGAIN!??!?!?!

random: you are so prettyy 😍😍

random: the tourist shops are the best lmao

ferrantorres: he said he likes the third pic 🤣🤣

random: who is he...?

random: HE?

random: The fact that I miss her being somewhere else cause her party posts were always so fun

random: ARE WE REALLY GONNA IGNORE GAVI'S COMMENT?????

pablogavi: 😍😍

random: AAAA

random: IM FREAKING OUT

-

@yourinsta

night time in bcn >

liked by pedri, pablogavi and 829,729 others.

random: camp nou at night tho>>

random: how did she even get in there at night?

random: maybe it was a matchday

random: but there was no game yesterday

random: its older then

random: i love living in barcelona

random: i was there in that pool it was so cool

random: the third pic is so quiet...

random: WHY DO PEDRI AND GAVI LIKE HER POSTS

random: where did you get the hoodie from??

random: youre so pretty in the first pic

-

@yourinsta

this past week was an absolute dream, now I'm back to studying 😖

liked by pablogavi, ferrantorres and 739,729 others.

random: i can imagine that the past week was a dream. the barca players also like my posts in my dreams.

random: LMAOOO

random: I'd die to have your hair

random: whats the dogs name??

random: love how she represents the girl aesthetic of studying while having starbucks

random: frrrr

random: i absolutely live for the makeup in the first pic

random: hair tutorial when??

random: orange is so your color

random: nahh its still red

random: i still remember when she was in portugal... that felt like yesterday but ut was like 6 weeks ago

random: can we swap lifes? just for one day? pls

-

@yourinsta

photo dump 🎀

liked by pablogavi, pedri and 1,012,829 others.

random: prettyyyy

pablogavi: buen coche 🤔 (nice car)

random: AAA

random: whats with the emoji tho...

random: how is she so lucky that barca players keep liking her posts???

random: first

random: GAVI DRIVES A CUPRA TOO. MY THEORY

random: shut up do you know how many people drive cupras?

random: yeah shes right

random: youre gorgeous. im serious.

random: hala madrid

-

@yourinsta

day at home 💞

liked by pablogavi, pedri and 1,082,992 others.

random: YOUR HAIR IS SO HEALTHY. HOW.

random: okay i love that dog, its official.

random: youre giving golden retriver

random: i adore your aesthetic fr

random: how do you manage to stay so organized

random: when is your next trip?

random: youre so prettyy

-

@yourinsta

what am i without watching sports??

liked by pablogavi and 992,829 others.

random: F1 ON TOP

pablogavi: 😍

random: hey gavi

yourbestie: What are you without sports in general???

random: TAKE ME WITH YOU

random: frr football and f1>>>

random: oh how i wish to be a wag

random: idk how people can be bored of watching sports

random: i love camp nou its so pretty

-

@pablogavi

liked by yourinsta, pedri and 2,829,729 others

yourinsta: ayy guapo *liked by creator

random: wait hear me out. isnt that yns dog?

random: Omg youre right

random: HES SO FINEEEE

random: since when does he have a dog???

random: cant wait for the game against Cádiz!!!!

random: maybe theyre just friends...?

ferrantorres: 🤣🤣

random: OMG HIII

random: FERRAN SNITCHING??

random: you focus on scoring goal first

random: 😍😍😍

random: THATS YNS DOG???

random: YESS AAAAA

random: oh my god theyre just hanging out, chill that doesnt mean that theyre dating...

-

@yourinsta

fine... yall little detectives figured it out...

liked by pablogavi and 2,018,662 others.

pablogavi: ❤️

pedri: finally!!! took long enough

ferrantorres: yall were so bad at hiding it from public

ferminlopez: they grow up so fast 😭😭

random: AAAAA

random: IM SCREAMING

random: THIS WAS SO UNEXPECTED

mikkykiemeney: welcome to the public wags 🫶🏻❤️

yourinsta: aaaa ❤️

hectorforr_: desearía serlo Y/n 😍😍 joder hermano te ves bien ( i wish i was yn, fuck brother you look good)

random: WHA

random: fort bro crazyyy

pablogavi: 💀

llamineyamal: mis padres 😍😍 (my parents)

random: lmaooo

random: THEYRE DATING???

jpcancelo: Por fin ya no nos molestará más jajaja 🤣🤣🤣 (finally he won't annoy us anymore)

pablogavi: 💀

aurorapaezg: 😍😍

random: aurora tell me is she good to gavi?

random: IM. DYING.

joaofelix14: @yourinsta tenemos que compartir ahora (we gotta share now)

yourinsta: PFFFF

random: HAHAHA

[endthedream]

hygge

pairing: model!niki x photographer!reader

summary: meeting at a time where the both of you need a supportive person the most, a beautiful friendship (or more) rises from similar struggles.

words: 6k

story colour: gray

notes: I know this story is shorter than the other ones but I still feel a bit awkward writing about Niki. I tried my best tho and hope all of you can enjoy this story! <3

masterlist of 'enhypen as jobs'

Hygge

noun

a quality of coziness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being (regarded as a defining characteristic of Danish culture).

If there was one word your father would describe you with it would be ‘vivacious’. You have always been full of life, walking around with a smile on your face and appreciating the small, little things in life. He called you a ray of sunshine, touched by the angels, and graced with the gift of never-ending happiness. He said you were his inspiration, his muse, his realization of how magical the world can be, and how there is always good in bad. He said you were everything he ever wished for in life.

He used to tell you stories about his travels around the world, places that he captured with the lens of his camera and people he remembered in his heart. Your father told you everything about the world, the cultures, and the unimaginable love he felt when he visited those places. How inspiration was at every corner, how he could see beauty in the tragedies of the world and how everything he felt changed him. He was just a little boy, when he thought he knew the world he never even saw before, but when he came back, he was a man, full of knowledge and respect.

One place he still carries deeply in his heart is Denmark. Not only because it is a beautiful country, so full of wonders and stories, but also because there was one thing he learned from his visit, one thing he still carries with him. ‘Hygge’ is what it is called. A word he now lives by. A word with a greater meaning that inspired the way he was thinking. Hygge is finding happiness in the little things in life. He was the one that taught you from when you were a child that happiness is made out of those small little moments rather than just grant events, finding magic in the ordinary, commonplace, imperfections. You think that he was the one that turned you into the vivacious person you are today.

Your father stopped traveling the world when he met your mom, but his love and passion for photography stayed. He sent his pictures to every agency, working his way up until this point. Until he started taking pictures of the most famous people in the world. It’s not something that he originally wanted or planned, but it is definitely something he enjoys. Because instead of traveling to meet people around the world, he invites them to his studio and takes photos of them. He has met dozens of people without even having to leave town.

It’s been two weeks since you ‘officially’ started working for your dad. You have been helping him at his studio ever since you can remember, and when he offered you to work for him full-time, you couldn’t say no.

Much like him you love photography, always taking pictures of everything and everyone. It has become your thing, your passion as well. And while working at your dad’s studio isn’t the kind of photography you originally wanted to do, it is a start that will hopefully take you far. Like him, you want to travel the world, appreciate every single country and capture everything you see with the lens of your camara. You want to have a blog where you can post those pictures and write about the experiences you have during your travels. You want to inspire people to follow their dreams, to pick up a camera and express themselves, to find who they really are. You want to be able to close your eyes, take a deep breath and know that the moment you open your eyes again, the view that will wait for you is worth every single dollar on this planet.

“You are daydreaming again.”, you can hear the voice of your father right next to your ear, making you snap out of your thoughts and turn around to him. He is grinning from ear to ear, arms folded.

“Sorry.”, you say, showing him a sheepish smile before looking back into the computer right in front of you, showing a picture of a woman who came in her just two days ago. “I am almost done with editing though. How do you like it?”

Your father leans down, eyes skimming over the picture for a few seconds before looking at you again. “I like how you enhanced the colors of her dress, but I think it’s too dark. We wanted to go with a more tropical, summery vibe and now it looks like fireworks on a stormy night. Brighten the picture and see what you can do to get rid of the white dots in the background.” You never said working for your dad was easy. He is your loving, kind, devoted father, but he is also a businessman. He knows what looks good and what doesn’t and whenever he takes the pictures, he has an exact vision of how it has to turn out.

“Oh, and we also got a last-minute photo shoot for tomorrow. I think this is your chance to show off your photographer skills.” In an instant you spin around in your chair, eyes wide and mouth hung open.

“What? But dad, I’ve never taken professional photos before. What if I mess up the shot and you will get a bad reputation?” Until recently, photography was a hobby to you, just capturing small things you saw while taking walks, taking pictures of your friends and family or sometimes even creating abstract pictures, but never have you ever done it professionally. Not with an expensive camera or twelve lights around you or with a model in front of you. God, especially not with a model that has probably high expectations in you.

“Y/n, sweetheart, this is a good opportunity for you. And I will just be two rooms away, if you struggle or have any questions, you can always get me. But you will never make it if you don’t step over your own boundaries. How will you travel the world and capture everything with a lens, when you can’t do it right now? That’s how you learn it and that’s how you grow within it. Don’t see this as a challenge, see this as an opportunity to come out big into the world of photography.” It’s quiet for a moment, you taking the time to think about your fathers’ words and your father taking the time to study your face. He knows that this is a big step for you, but he needs to push you over your own boundaries and help you over the fear of failing.

“Okay, yeah, okay, you are right, dad. I can do this. Who will I have the photoshoot with?” Placing one hand comfortingly on your shoulder, your dad smiles proudly at you. You love that look on his face, the love and pride radiating from it. It fills you with joy and the determination to always give your best in every situation. It has made you turn into the efficient and hard-working person you are today.

“His name is Niki Nishimura. He is a model from Japan, and I thought that this would be perfect for you since the two of you are the same age. I think that you will be able to hit it off perfectly.” There is something in you that stops for a second. You have heard of Niki before from girls in your class, have seen the covers of magazines he is on and commercials on the tv. He is popular, well, more than that actually. Niki is the face of the most well-known brands, walks on fashion week catwalks and on top of that is known for his sweet and polite personality. He is the whole package, and you are going to meet him tomorrow.

“Are you okay?”, your father asks you after you’ve been silent for a while. “Do you know Mr. Nishimura?”

��Know him?”, you say, voice suddenly rising. “Dad he is so popular. Everyone knows him. How do you expect me to do a photo shooting with him when he has literally been on every single magazine I see? How am I supposed to keep my cool when he walked for fashion week in Paris? Dad, this is a huge responsibility, I can’t do that.”

“No, you cannot change your mind now. Y/n, what happened when you said ‘Yeah, dad, you are right. I can do this. Thank you for giving me this wonderful opportunity. You are the best dad in this whole world, and everyone should be jealous because they don’t have such a kind, loving, fantastic, talented, handsome father like I do.’”, he says, mimicking your voice in a high-pitched tone, and you can’t hide the small grin on your lips.

“First of all, that’s not how I sound. Second, you are so full of yourself.” You dramatically roll your eyes as you let your head fall into your arms. “And third, that was before I knew the photo shoot was going to be with the freaking Niki Nishimura. This changes things, dad, this changes things drastically.”

“Y/n, stop being so hard on yourself. Famous or not, that boy is still a human being. He is the same age as you are, so don’t think of him any differently. This is the first lesson you have to learn in this kind of work. Celebrities are humans too. They are just known by more people, but they go to the toilet like you, and they probably also do dance parties in their room late at night when they think their dads are asleep.” Your cheeks turn red as you hear the last sentence, not having known that your dad actually heard you dancing late at night in your room before. But before you can open your mouth and defend yourself, your dad continues. “They are like you and me, sweetheart. So, don’t worry, okay? If anyone can do this, then you. I believe in you, with all my heart.”

-

Your hands are shaking as you set up the camera. The lights are already on and directed right at the boy in front of you, who is currently watching you with attentive eyes as you fiddle around with the tripod. You were aware that Niki is known for his respectful personality, but when he walked into your dads’ studio, you didn’t expect him to be this… shy. He really seemed like a little boy who lost his parents in a supermarket. Niki was barely able to mumble a quick hello to you and tell you his name.

“Are you ready?”, you ask him, looking up at the boy who quickly- almost as if he was caught doing something wrong- looks down at the ground, nodding his head. “Okay, I’m just going to fix this light, since I think it makes you look to pale, and then we can start.”

Without waiting for an answer, you walk over to the softbox, changing its position a bit.

You are so caught up in your head that you get startled as you hear the boy in front of you start to talk. “Your hands are shaking.” It’s a simple sentence, a simple statement, but it makes you stop in your tracs. You look up at him yet again, noticing that he has taken off the sunglasses he has to wear for the shoot. There is something in his eyes- softness, you think- that makes you feel comfortable, less nervous.

“Yes.”, you stutter, clearing your throat a few times. “I’m nervous. This is my first time doing a real photo shoot, and I’m… just terrified that I will make a mistake.” Niki just nods at your words, taking a few seconds to look around the room, which gives you time to take in his outfit for this shoot. You haven’t really looked at him closely, not wanting to make him uncomfortable in any way.

He wears an all-black outfit, black slacks with a black shirt underneath a black blazer. The red and white collar of his shirt gives the outfit the finishing touch, hinting just a bit of color that is needed to compliment him. He looks amazing, dashing, like he is out of a movie- a James Bond movie probably. And you realize you have never seen a more gorgeous person in your whole entire life.

“I’m sure you will be doing just perfect.”, he says, giving you a tight-lipped smile at a thumbs up. You have to scoff slightly at his try of encouragement, showing him the same tight-lipped smile, before continuing to change the position of the softbox.

Somehow your hands are even more shaky as you stand in front of the camera again, your breaths come in shallow, and your vision become blurry. You have to close your eyes for a few seconds, trying to calm yourself down, trying to remind yourself that it’s just a photo shoot and that Niki is just a normal boy. But it doesn’t work, your mind is spiraling with all these bad thoughts and can’t stop them from coming over and over again, attacking and breaking you into pieces.

“Hey, are you sure you’re fine? You look like you are about to faint.” You hear Nikis’ voice, but it is somewhere in the distance, you can’t grasp if it is miles away or right beside you. The world starts turning and you really think you might actually lose control over your whole body.

“Yeah.”, you can hear your own voice, but you can’t feel your lips moving. “Just… just give me a second.” You stumble backwards, eyes still closed and somehow you land right on your behind. You don’t open your eyes, still too afraid of how your surroundings look. You don’t even flinch when you feel two hands taking yours.

“Listen to me, okay? Just follow what I am saying.” There it is again, Nikis voice. There is a mix of concern and determination in it, but you don’t have time to think about that any longer. “Breath in, and out. Again. In and out.” You continue this pattern for a few minutes. Niki guiding your breaths and you following his orders. And you can slowly start feeling yourself calm down.

When you open your eyes again, the world has stopped spinning, your heart beats at a normal speed again and your hands stopped shaking. Niki is sitting beside you, watching you carefully. “Thanks.”, you just mumble, letting out a long and deep sigh.

“No need to thank me.”

There is a comfortable silence surrounding the two of you, and for a moment you forget that there is someone sitting right beside you, until Niki speaks up again. “Did that happen to you before?”

You shake your head, letting a hand glide through your hair. “No, never. I think I was just worrying too much about everything that my body just couldn’t handle it anymore.”

Niki nods slightly, eyes fixated at a point in front of him. “I used to have panic attacks all the time. Before photo shootings, before catwalks, before pretty much anything.” You look at him as he speaks, seeing the pain on his face as he remembers past moments. “I was nervous, terrified of messing up, of not being good enough, of failing every single person in my life. Those thoughts never left my mind, and I did not know how to stop them. I felt helpless, and I didn’t want to talk to anyone about it, afraid they might laugh at me or think I am a pathetic little boy.”

“What did you do to change that?”, you ask him, attentively listening to him and hanging onto every word that was coming out of his mouth.

“Well, I started believing in myself more. Because why would people book me for modeling, if they didn’t think I was good at it? I started telling myself that I am good enough, that I made it this far, because I am good at what I am doing. Believing in yourself is always the first step to a healthier mindset.” You watch as he nervously picks at the skin on his fingers, before continuing. “And then I started telling myself that we are all just tiny little humans on a tiny little planet in this big universe. Why would I waste my time caring about my looks, or the way I walk and talk, when nothing of that is important? I mean, it is important, but you know what I mean. It seems like nothing compared to the universe. Why should I care about the opinions of others, when I will probably never see them again in my life? Why would I give my precious time to people who will just waste it, if I can surround myself with nothing but happiness? After all, we are all just little humans having dreams and hopes, having a life of our own and chasing one thing. Happiness.”

There is a silent tear rolling down your cheeks as you hear his words, but you quickly wipe it away before he can notice it.

“And then I started to talk to people about my thoughts, and it helped so much. Other models told me about their worries, about their problems. And suddenly, I didn’t feel alone anymore. I felt understood, like someone tuck me into bed with a warm blanket and kissed my forehead.” There is a short moment where you both smile into the distance, caught in your own heads, before Niki directs his gaze back at you. “I’ve seen your dads’ work, that’s why I wanted to come here and get my pictures taken by him. And when he told my agency about you, his prodigy daughter, I knew that if a person as talented as him recommends you do the photo shoot with me, then you must be just as talented as he is. When I saw you today, saw the way you took so much care of the equipment and about every single person on this set, I knew that I wouldn’t want anyone else to take photos of me. You just have to believe in yourself more, trust yourself and your abilities and stop the spiral in your head. Stop thinking and just do what you love to do.”

-

“So, I went up to him and told him to get lost. I mean he is famous, yes, but that doesn’t give him the right to treat other people like that. Especially since my dad was having a photo shoot with him. Like be grateful that at least someone is taking pictures of you.” Niki laughs at your story, long having forgotten the hot chocolate in front of him. After your panic attack, Niki proposed a little break, so you took him to one of the best cafés in town.

“It’s so good that you gave him a piece of your mind. Sometimes fame really gets into peoples’ brains and they start thinking they are above anyone.” You nod your head, smiling at him widely and taking a bit of the cake you ordered. You close your eyes, enjoying the different flavors melting on your tongue. And when you open your eyes again, you find Niki staring at you, a fascinated look on his face. You show him a questioning look, swallowing another bite of your cake.

“I find it fascinating.”, he says, fork poking his own cake. “The way you seem to soak up every single small thing in life. Just a second ago, you looked like you were soaking up the flavor of this cake with your whole body. On the walk here, you stopped walking just to watch a bee on the flowers of the flower shop we passed by, and your eyes were actually sparkling. And it’s the way you talk about things, especially your dad. You have this way of making me feel like I was actually there with you throughout all your little stories. It’s just fascinating how much someone can enjoy life and all its little wonders.”

There is a faint tint of blush slowly creeping up your cheeks and you quickly try to hide it by covering your face with your hair. “Do you know the word hygge?” Niki shakes his head at your question, waiting for you to continue. “It’s a word from Denmark and it basically has the meaning of enjoying the small things in life and finding happiness in them. I learned it from my father and been living by it all my life.”

“That is so beautiful.” You can feel the air shift. Niki lowers his head, fork dropping beside his cake. “Sometimes I feel like my life is moving so far. I have to be somewhere new every single day. I rush from one place to another without having time to appreciate the stuff I get to see and do every single day. Everything moves so quickly, and I feel like I can’t just be a simple kid, living a simple life. I have to be a mature role model who knows everything and behaves perfectly at all times. I had to do that since I was fifteen. And it’s just… exhausting. Sometimes I just want to stop time and be… me. I want to appreciate things, stuff myself full of food until I’m nauseous, play pranks on my friends without being titled as mean. I want to act goofy without being called childish, even though I am still seventeen.”

Sniffling down your tears, you reach over to grab Nikis’ hand. “Listen to me, Niki. You are the bravest, most talented, kind-hearted person ever. Life isn’t treating anyone fairly, but we should not let that decide our whole future. If you really want to enjoy life to its fullest, then do it. Take a break, talk to your management or something like that. If you really want something, you can always get it, if you want deeply want it. People will always have something they won’t like about you, because they are jealous and miserable, but just remember that you don’t know those people and you never will. So, don’t let them decide who you are, and definitely don’t let them have power over who you want to be. Life is too short to waste it, and we won’t stay young forever. It’s important to enjoy every single little thing before it is too late.”

There is a single tear rolling down Nikis’ face, but he catches it with his thumb before it can land on the table. He takes a few breaths, calming himself down, before looking into your eyes again. He shows you a sad smile, the hand that is still holding yours squeezing in an appreciating manner. “Thank you so much for telling me all that. You don’t know how much this means to me, Y/N.”

“Don’t thank me for something like that, Niki. I just said what you needed to hear a long time ago.”  A few seconds of silence fill the air, Niki just looks around, trying not to think too much about your words. He doesn’t want to tear up yet again. “Okay, before any of us will start bawling their eyes out, how about you finish your cake, and I will take you to a cool place?”

-

Nikis’ eyes widen at the scene in front of him. The towns autumn festival is known for being breathtaking, decorations of pumpkins, leaves and mushrooms everywhere, a fairy’s wheel laced with moos and fairy lights, games you can play at every corner and a big campfire where people laugh, talk, sing and grill marshmallows. Niki doesn’t know where to look first, his eyes trying to take in every single little thing at once, before eventually landing on you, again.

“This is, wow, Y/n, this is the coolest thing I have ever seen.” You smile brightly at him before tugging on his sleeve, silently telling him to follow you. You walk up to a stand selling waffles, smiling at the elderly guy.

“Hey, Mr. Kim. Can we have two waffles, and please give them a bit of extra chocolate sauce, my friend here has never tried your waffles before.”

“Y/n, my dear, anything for you.” Niki and you both watch as Mr. Kim prepares the waffles, adding sprinkles on them and even an extra amount of whipped cream. Before you can take out your wallet to pay, Mr. Kim shakes his head violently. “No, it’s on the house. You have never brought a friend here before. Enjoy the waffles, okay?” With red cheeks you nod at the kind man, taking the waffles from him and walking to a free table with Niki.

“So, you never brought a friend here, huh?” You can hear the teasing tone in Nikis’ voice, but you are too ashamed to look at him. It’s not like you never wanted to bring a friend here, but it just never felt right. Friends weren’t really a permanent thing in your life, having had too many bad experiences with them. And whenever you had a friend that you started to trust, you always felt like they would destroy this magical festival for you. But with Niki it was different. You just felt so comfortable with Niki, so understood. Niki is different than anyone you have ever met, and after his confession earlier, you just knew that you had to share this with him. You had to share this beautiful place with him.

“I never really had friends. Whenever I did, they only seemed to like me because my dad is somewhat known. They wanted to get some fame as well. So, I just stopped looking for friends. You are the first person I feel like could actually like me for me, you know.”

Niki smiles at you, for the thousands time today, taking a bite out of his waffle. “I already do like you for you, Y/n. And I really appreciate it that I am the first person you bring here. But I just want to say that, wow, these waffles are amazing. I feel like I’ve been kissed by an angel, like I am at the beach hearing the waves softly crash against the sand, like I am floating on a cloud, like I am a changed man.” You laugh at his words, holding your stomach and tipping your head back. Niki watches you, eyes trained on your face, and he realizes how much he loves being the reason for your laughter. “Like I want to marry this waffle, that’s how good it is. And then we have little waffle children running around, spreading sugary joy all over the world. And then me and this waffle will watch those waffle children grow up and have waffle children themselves. We will sit on the porch, in little rocking chairs and watch our waffle grandchildren play in the front yard.” Tears are flooding down your cheeks from laughing at his words. There are people staring at the two of you, but you don’t care, you just live in this moment together.

-

“And that cloud looks like a cat eating ice cream.” The sun is setting painting the sky in different shades of pink and yellow, as you stop at the top of the fairy’s wheel. This is your third time riding the fairy’s wheel, not caring about the amount of money you are spending on it. You subconsciously hug the unicorn plushie Niki has won you earlier- after at least twelve tries- tighter to your chest as you look up at the sky with him.

“Oh, and that cloud looks a big popcorn bucket.” Rolling your eyes at the boy sitting beside you, you can’t help the grin that creeps itself up on your lips.

“You are so bad at this, Niki.” He just chuckles at your comment, eyes focusing on you again. “It’s not a popcorn bucket it is obviously a dragon drinking a cup of Pepsi.”

“Okay, this is the first one that I cannot see, Y/n. How is this a dragon? It is just a big blob, nothing more.” Gasping at his words, you shake your head in disappointment at his lack of creativity.

“How could you say that about Mr. Dragon. Has he done anything to you? No, he hasn’t. He is just enjoying his Pepsi, and you are insulting him like that. I cannot believe you right now.” Niki tips his head back in laughter, wiping at his eyes.

“Thank you.”, he says between laughs, voice raised a few pitches higher than normally.

“For what?”, you ask him.

“For this day, Y/n. This has been the coolest day ever, and all that thanks to you. I never had so much fun, I never laughed so much and so hard. I swear my belly and my jaw hurt from laughing so much.” There is this happiness, this pride, filling your heart as you hear his words. You have never felt this way before, never had someone tell you such sweet words, and thanking you for company. You swallow your tears, blinking a few times up into the sky, before you can face him again.

“You’re welcome, Niki. I hope that you can have many, many more days like this one in the future with a lot of people all over the world. Because that is what you deserve.”

“Well, I hope I can have many more days like this as well with you, right? After this day we won’t just pretend we never met, we won’t just become strangers, right? This day will lead to an amazing friendship that will last until we are old and gray, right?” You smile at him, scooting over to him and softly taking his hand in yours.

“Of course, Niki. I won’t let you leave. You are stuck with me now.” You grin brightly at him, squeezing his hand appreciatively.

“Oh, no. I take back what I said. You scare me.”

“Nope.”, you say. “No take backs, Niki. This is only the beginning.”

“So, if you are that confident in our friendship? Will you do the photo shoot with me now?”

-

“Those photos are amazing, Y/n. God, I am so proud of you. You did everything just as I imagined it to be, even better actually. I knew you could do it.” Your father wraps you into a tight hug, holding you against him and a bright, proud grin on your face. Pride fills your entire body as you hear those words out of your father’s mouth. You have been editing those pictures, making them perfect, for the past few days, night and day, and knowing that it turned out amazing, was worth all the stressful hours.

“Thanks dad, but I don’t want to have all the credit. Without my muse I wouldn’t have been able to pull everything off.”

Your dad breaks the hug, giving you a stern- not serious- look. “Your muse, huh? I heard Niki and you got really cozy at the autumn festival. You can’t fool me; I have eyes and ears everywhere. I tell you, before anything he becomes your boyfriend, I want to formally meet him first. I want to know everything about this boy and then I will decide if he can date my precious daughter.”

“Dad!”, you complain, cheeks redder than the tomatoes your dad is growing in his garden. “It’s not like that. I mean not yet. We are friends, dad.”

“Yeah, but if, sweetheart, if he becomes your boyfriend, I want to meet him first.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Let’s just get out these photos.” With one last smile in your dad’s direction, you walk back to your desk, the pictures of Niki still on your screen. But before you can do anything, your phone ring tone breaks the silence in the room. Smiling as you see Nikis’ contact, you open the text message he sent you, seeing a picture of him at a zoo somewhere in Japanese with the caption ‘Enjoying the little things right now and thinking about you. I’m already counting down the days till we meet again’.

Holding the phone to your chest, you can’t help but grin like a lovesick idiot. Life is great, it’s hard and exhausting sometimes, but it’s great. And you can’t wait to continue enjoying the small little moments it gives you with Niki by your side.

Bonus

“Only three more days.” Nikis’ voice says through the speaker of your phone as you look at the screen of your laptop.

In three days, it will be the fifth time you and Niki will attend the autumn festival in your town. It’s already been five years since you met, five years since you grew up together and five years since you started to enjoy the little things in life together. It still feels surreal to you, having him by your side for such a long time now.

“Three more days till I see you again, Y/n.” The excitement in his voice is evident and it warms your heart, fills it with so much appreciation for the boy on the other side of the planet. Niki is currently in Paris, attending his last fashion week for this year, and you are in Thailand, one of the countries you always wanted to visit. You have taken thousands of pictures, talked to hundreds of people and learned so much about their culture. It has been a dream, these past few weeks, and you wouldn’t trade this experience for anything in this world. But part of you misses your home, misses your dad, and misses Niki. You had one of the greatest times of your life, but you are ready to go home again.

“I can’t wait to see you.”, you say after a while, closing the laptop, grabbing your phone and sitting down outside on your little balcony. “God, I’ve missed you so much, you don’t even know.”

“Aw.”, he coos. “Are you getting emotional my sweet tiny little baby.”

“I take my words back.” You can hear his laughter through the phone, smiling at the familiar noise that became your favorite sound over the years. “But all jokes aside, I really do miss you, Niki.”

“I miss you too.”, he says, sighing softly after his words. “But it’s only three more days, right? We did five months before, so we can easily do three more days.”

“Those three days feel longer than the five months though.” You wrap your jacket tighter around yourself, slightly shaking in the cold evening wind. It’s times like this that you long for him the most, that you wish he was by your side. Traveling has shaped you in so many ways, helped you find who you really are and taught you so much about the world, but it also made you realize how much you value having a fixed place to stay, to settle down. It made you realize what you really want.

“What are you thinking about right now?”, Niki asks you, shifting from his position on his hotel bed. You can almost imagine him, messy hair, make up stains still left on his face and his SpongeBob pajamas on.

“You, I’m thinking about you. And us. Our future.”, you answer him honestly, eyes raised up into the deep blue sky.

“This is only the beginning.”, he whispers, voice low and deep with emotions. “This is only the beginning of our forever together, of our hygge together. It’s crazy to think about that sometimes, you know. The fact that we came into each other’s lives at a time where we needed it the most, and the fact that we made it so far. It’s crazy, but so indescribably beautiful. I can’t wait for these three days to pass by Y/n. And I can’t wait for every single day to pass by with you by my side. This is only our beginning, Y/n. And I already know where we can start together.” Niki stops his sentence, taking a small breath, making you anticipate his next words. “In Denmark.”

[alonetimelover]

pairing: Harry Styles x singer!reader (fc: Rihanna)

summary: “Well-known people usually don’t have the privilege to protect their private life. It’s impressive for how long you did it,”

a/n: this one has been in my drafts for months. i just found it and decided to post it before writing for scientist!reader. enjoy!

masterlist

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harryupdates Celebrating YN's half-time performance at tonight's Super Bowll here's a throwback to 2013 MTV awards.

view all 3 402 comments

hArrysbtch good ol' days when Harry was eating oranges during award shows

ynupdates i still think they look super cute together

harrysfan and then harry made 1D boys sing fourfive seconds on radio 1??? he had a big crush on her

ynsfan01 yn later that night during the interview? 'they had very tasty fruits during performances' girl...

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harrysno1fan

liked by harryupdates, harrysmoustache and 9 201 others

harrysno1fan Harry arriving in Glendale, Arizona a few hours ago. what the hell is he doing in the US???? wasn't he literally wasted at the BRITs like 5 hours ago??? isn't he supposed to be in Australia like tomorrow???

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harryupdates interesting

harryfootball is he there for super bowl???

⤷ harrysbtch i don't think he knows much about American football, most like something to do with the half time show

⤷ harrysmoustache are you saying that he's going to be YN's surprise guest????? im gonna pass out

harryfan82 he's gonna boil in those clothes xd

ynupdates i hope he's there for the half time show

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harryandyn

liked by ynupdates, harryshoee and 3 201 others

harryandyn remember when this photo resurfaced a few years ago? and nobody said it was a photoshop and no one knew about it being real? I stand by my words then - they're closer than we think. mark my words people

view all 792 comments

ynupdates well, that would be a real power couple

harryupdates a collab would be a dream

hArrysbtch harry did admit having a crush on yn for years, maybe he acted on it?

ynsfan101 you all know that yn has a baby??

⤷ ynsmybestie of course, but she never said who the father is (she doesn't have to, her choice) so it gives you a place to speculate - respectfully!!!

⤷ ynshands babes, yn is super private, so is harry... it could work

⤷ ynsfan101 all im saying its strange not having seen them once together outside of award shows

⤷ ynsmybestie years in the industry teach you that

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ynupdates

liked by ynsmybestie, harryupdates and 37 201 others

ynupdates YN DURING THE HALFTIME SHOW! SHE IS PREGNANT WITH HER SECOND CHILD !!! the moment they showed I screamed so loud at the TV...

view all 12 201 comments

ynsmybestie OMFGAKWSK i am so happy for her

ynsmymama yas, im gonna have another sibling 💀

ynshands guys, we're not getting this album, like ever

ynsnextalbum hi guys, I'm not coming till 2040

harrysmoustache did you guys saw harry during the performance???????

⤷ hArrysbtch they're so together, no way

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harryupdates

liked by ynupdates, harrysmoustache and 21 301 others

harryupdates HARRY AT THE SUPER BOWL !!! Harry attended half time show (YN's performance) and then left with her team...

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ynupdates he looks very comfy 💀

hArrysbtch they're SOOOOO together, no other way

harrysmoustache power couple

ynsmybestie i knew yn had good taste in man

hArrysbtch wait

hArrysbtch wooow

hArrysbtch DOES IT MEAN THAT HARRY IS A DAD ???!

⤷ harrysfan291 no way

⤷ ynsmybestie i mean... it's possible

⤷ harryshands HE IS A FATHER???

harryfan82 let's not spread rumours

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harrystyles

liked by yourinstagram, ynupdates, harrysupdates, violadavis and 24 201 291 others

harrystyles yourinstagram 👶🏾👶🏾

view all 582 201 comments

yourinstagram we make beautiful babies

⤷ harrystyles it's all you, mama

ynupdates no words....

harryupdates congratulations!!!!

violadavis oh, mama. do you ever get some sleep?

⤷ yourinstagram barely, its harrystyles fault

⤷ harrystyles mint ice cream?

⤷ yourinstagram 🧍🏻‍♂️🧎🏿‍♀️

⤷ ynsmybestie girl????? oh, you got it BAD bad

ynsmybestie so she really in love? damn

harrysmoustache he's a daddy?????

ynshands well, now i know your babies are gonna be the most beautiful

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harrysupdates

liked by ynupdates, harrysmoustache and 6 201 others

harrysupdates HARRY AND YN AT THE HOTEL IN GLENDALE! i have a feeling after yesterday we're gonna see much more of them

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harrysmoustache they're in love love, got it

harrysfan290 might go sleep on the highway tonight

hArrysbtch it's too much to process. Harry's taken, he's with THEE YN, he's got a child and another one on the way???

ynupdates so they're that kinda couple? love it

ynshands yeah, it's been long enough since I felt this lonely, fair enough

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, taylorswift, annetwist, ynupdates, harrysupdates and 42 201 304 others

yourinstagram did this photoshoot not knowing little Bee is gonna have a sibling. harrystyles thank you for... you know what, for once i'll keep it PG ❤

britishvogue thank you for letting us be on the cover

view all 729 392 comments

harrystyles thank you for Bee and little Sprout ❤

⤷ yourinstagram love you

taylorswift congratulations you two!

annetwist Can't wait to meet my second grandchild ❤️

harryupdates the joined interview???? babes

ynupdates i cried while reading the interview

hArrysbtch looking good, mama 🧎‍♀️

⤷ yourinstagram making me blush, im taken!

⤷ hArrysbtch what the hell???

⤷ yourinstagram i like your username, relatable

⤷ hArrysbtch JAIL

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https://www. vogue.co.uk/news/article/yn-and-harry-and-their family

British Vogue

On a surprisingly sunny day in London, our writer Tommy Jenkins was invited to the beautiful rural home on the outskirts of the busy capital city. The garden was blooming with spring flowers, covering the better part of the front house garden. On the porch was the whole YSN-Styles family - YN, Harry and their little first child - Bee (nickname, name not yet revealed to the public). 

The first time I talked to YN was after the 2014th MTV Music Awards, already struck by her presence, the way she presented herself and treated everyone around her - always kind, helpful and ready to cooperate. This is my first interview with YN, but also Harry Styles, who is YN’s husband. 

“We’ve been married, what, about seven months?” YN wondered, looking at Harry, who was cuddling their nine-month-old son. 

“Seven months and fourteen days exactly, time flies.”

“He’s better with dates than me,” YN countered with a smile. 

The wedding was small, held in this very house, I’ve been for the last few hours. Closest family and friends, sleeping Bee in the first row attended the ceremony, which then transferred to a dinner with Stevie Nicks performing. After my question of why they didn't announce it to the public, Harry took over the wheel, “there was no need to. It was something very private, personal to us. It uhm it still feels wrong to talk about with you, no offence.” No offence was taken. “Well-known people usually don’t have the privilege to protect their private life. It’s impressive for how long you did it,” I responded. “It’s sad. But we made it work.”

Enjoy the rest of the interview and learn about YN and Harry’s relationship, their future plans, YN’s new album and Harry’s next film role. 

TJ: Coming back to the privacy, what tipped the weight on the scales to accept our interview? 

YN: Good question. I think - well - I think after I decided to do the HalfTime Show it was bound to happen. There was no way I could hide my huge belly. Laughs. It just came up one evening and we were like “fuck it, let’s do it”.

TJ: HalfTime Show, how was it?

YN: Exhausting. It’s not easy dancing with this big of a belly, especially when you know that your child is right there. There - we had some second thoughts when I started to near the seven month mark. Just like with Bee my belly got quite big - which I love to see, hate to manoeuvre - I mean my back and legs are hurting me non stop. But going back to the topic - umm - yeah. The decision was hard, but we made it together. 

TJ: Harry, you came to the show right after winning everything you could on the BRITs. Congratulations, by the way!

Harry: Thank you. Blushing. Ehmm, yeah, in the beginning we decided to be together at the show. I actually didn’t want to be at the BRITs but YN bought me a plane ticket. Laughs. Yeah, I just flew to Glendale the day of the show to support my wife. 

TJ: How was the dancing on the platforms, YN?

YN: Terrifying. But I was harnessed and secure. 

TJ: If you let me, I want to ask you about your first meeting. Was it actually the 2013 MTV awards?

YN: It was. Ten - oh my lord - ten years ago. It’s crazy! 

TJ: How was it?

YN: I don’t remember the award show, just eating some oranges form a cute stranger behind me and then giving him my number. Which he lost.

TJ: No, you didn’t!

Harry: I did, I did lose the YN YSN phone number. My mates - my band mates - teased me for months about it. It was scary, actually. 

TJ: And when did you meet next?

YN: When was it? December 2015?

Harry: Yeah. I may or may not have made my bandmates perform FourFive Seconds during our Live Lounge set, and it just sprinted from there. 

YN: I DMed him after being shown that video by my younger sister. And that DM is actually framed and hang in Harry’s home studio. 

TJ: What was it?

Harry: “I guess it took collaborating with Paul McCartney to have you give me a hint.” 

TJ: And you started from there?

YN: And never looked back. 

TJ: It wasn’t the last time you performed YN’s song, was it? Wild Thoughts?

YN: Laughing. I love this! 

Harry: That was our first - let’s say - crumb to give people about us. 

TJ: Please elaborate.

YN: I wrote my verses in Wild Thoughts with Harry in mind, let’s be real. He was my inspiration and has been since the moment we’ve started seeing each other. But it was Harry’s idea to cover it. I loved it and he did it beautifully, like always.

TJ: I assume your albums are about YN?

Harry: Smiles. 

TJ: Okay, I understand. Let’s move on. YN, when we are in the topic of music -

YN: Oh no. My fans sent you, didn’t they?!

TJ: I’m one of them! When can we expect something? A crumb even.

YN: Two months. I - I have a full album written. Don’t know if my fans will like it, it’s - it’s different from anything I’ve done already. It’s something more rock, I’d say. With R&B of course. I couldn’t abandon my favourite genre. There are a few collaborations, Lift Me Up is there, too, a few notes sprouted all over the tracks maybe meaning something. Smirking. I really want them all to like it, but I wouldn't blame them if they didn’t. That’s just the way of how things could go. 

TJ: I love it already.

Harry: It’s very beautiful. Personal and deep. 

TJ: Harry, you’ve just won twoGrammy awards. Congratulations. But I want to ask you about acting. Do you have something, a script that you want to take part in bringing up to live? 

Harry: Thank you. Uhm. Right now I’m touring and whenever the baby is born, we’re stopping. Time for family is the most important thing in my life. 

TJ: Thank you for talking with me and welcoming us to your home.

The day you’re reading this interview - when it is published - YN already dropped her album. It probably is no. 1 on Billboard and breaking records. And if not? Be ready to listen to new music from YN - it’s closer than ever. 

[calware]

You might've answered something like this before but how do you pick colours for your art? Your choices are always so striking, visually interesting and delightful. I would love to learn your ways. (also hi)

WAAHHHH THANK YOU <3 <3 (also hi!!) first of all i do have a post from quite a while back with some general tips that you can check out, but my process has changed a bit since then so i can definitely elaborate a little bit more!

observation

this first tip is not very straightforward (sorry) but something i try to do is pay attention to the colors and lighting in the real world and try to remember what moments really stick with me. like when you're watching the sunset and the light from the sky washes everything in pink and tints the buildings orange, or when it's dusk and the light blue of the sky contrasts with the dark blues of everything that's in shadow, or looking in a lake and all the greens, browns, and blues mix together in rich jewel tones

i try to keep track of these things & the emotions they make me feel (almost like taking notes in a mental journal) so i can try referencing them when i want a certain drawing to feel a certain way. AGAIN this is really not straightforward and i don't really know how helpful it actually is...? but i find that observation can be a really helpful tool and i find myself doing it a lot

references

sort of the same as the last point BUT using preexisting photos and artwork instead! this one is more straightforward because you can actually reference them as you are drawing. i said this in the other post i made but i think that looking at other images and asking yourself "how is the artist/photographer using the colors to make it look this way? how do i recreate that?" and using that as a way to study their use of colors can be really helpful. if you find a drawing that has cool colors, try using those colors in your own drawings and see how they look!

that said, i would try to avoid color-picking things directly because i find that if you try choosing them on your own you 1) gain a better understanding of what you're doing 2) have more control over what you're doing and 3) you can "push" your colors in ways you might not if you color-pick directly

play with contrasting hues

i think this might just be a personal preference, but i find that i'm not as big of a fan of monochromatic images, and i prefer it when drawings utilize a wide variety of hues. this goes especially for ones that implement more contrast in the hues (not necessarily where the colors have more contrast in value, but rather contrast as in they're further apart on the color wheel)

for example, in this drawing, everything is washed in green light except for rose's skin, which is a very saturated reddish-brown. this is sort of what i mean by "pushing" the colors because, in a realistic setting, a person sitting in green lighting is going to have a more greenish-looking skin tone (like in this drawing). you can see this in how the whites of the drawing—her hair and eyes—are greenish, but i made the stylistic choice to not do the same with her skin to create contrast between the two hues

i edited the one on the bottom to match the green-ness of the rest of the image, and the effect is pretty noticeable! green light makes people look less lively, almost sickly (which is good to use if that's the feeling you want to show, of course)

another small example of this is in this drawing where i use a couple of different hues in davesprite's body. overall, it registers as orange, but i like to ever-so-slightly introduce a bit of green to contrast with the orange, letting the lightest values tip into the greens instead of stopping at yellow to contrast with the muted red in the wings. the darkest values are purple, which also contrasts with the yellow parts. the only hue missing from this image is blue! the colors are all still analogous, and the greens and purples are a lot less saturated than the oranges and yellows, so nothing clashes and overall leads to a more subtle contrast

the colors on the top are the ones from the image, while the ones on the bottom i see used a lot more commonly—which isn't a bad thing! i just think it looks nice to use a wide range of hues because of the way they complement each other :)

other than these strategies, my process varies greatly depending on what i'm working on, so it's difficult to get any more specific than this (unless you'd like to ask about the process of a specific drawing!) there isn't really any step-by-step method i use for every drawing i make, usually i am doing something different each time based on the goals i have for the project

[thedgeoftheuniverse]

FOOL. | joel miller

pairing: post outbreak!joel miller x f!reader

word count: 3.9k

warnings: mentions of alcohol and trauma (non-specific but implied), enemies to lovers, slightly shaky timeline, defensive joel, light smut, sprinkle of a praise kink minors DNI!! (Photos are not mine! Pls dm for credit/removal)

requested by the lovely @marvelstarwars :3 i literally had so much fun writing this, thank you sm for requesting! i hope you enjoy !!

If you asked him, he would swear he only admired the flora adorning your porch; he simply paid no mind to you, nor how beautiful your hands looked as you poured water over the soil or the smile you flashed at a passerby on their nightly stroll. He did not care that it wasn't directed at him.

“Do you have any clue what an asshole you are?”

“You ain't too kind yourself, sweetheart.” 

“You won't let me be! I tried time and time and time again to be nice to you, and you're just such a dick no matter what I do, and I’m fucking sick of it." 

You were not prone to such outbursts—not anymore. Or so you believed. Eight years within the walls of Jackson, an almost haven in the midst of what you genuinely believed to be Hell, and the security such a place brought changed you (or perhaps reverted you back to who you were). Ample food supply, walls strong enough to keep Infected and humans alike out, community, friendship. It was a piece of the old world, frozen in time as the rest of the Earth fell farther and farther by the day. At times, you felt guilty; you could not recall a single action, decision, or thought you had to deserve such safety. Before your arrival at the community (arrival is a strong word; you were barely alive when Maria found you and thus had to be carried to the infirmary with no say in the matter), your hands were stained with blood, all the way down to the bone, and you had all but lost any semblance of the person you were before Outbreak Day. 

It was the greatest blessing that had ever been given to you. 

You remembered how to be gentle; you remembered how to entertain small talk; you remembered how to garden; and you remembered how the sun felt shining in from your bedroom window. You remembered how to smile. You remembered that there was a time you were kind, honest, and full of so much love that you had no choice but to share it with those around you, lest it threaten to consume you. You remembered how to connect with people and that those connections did not have to be purely beneficial. You found something you buried so deeply inside your chest that you believed it to have been long dead, snuffed out with the rest of the world. 

You remembered how to be human. 

The remnants of yourself that you pieced back together into a living, breathing person were respected and well known within the community. You befriended and loved even the most stubborn of newcomers; in a short time, you became a crucial part of fostering camaraderie and a sense of home, even for those who no longer believed it could exist. You owed your life to Maria and to Jackson, and you intended to pay the debt in full.

Joel Miller was a payment you somehow missed and a giant pain in your ass. He seemed determined to brush off every attempt you made at conversation, never bothering to look at you much less respond to your questions (“Hey! How're you settling in?” “Have you made it over to the Bison yet?” “How’s your daughter doing?") When conversation seemed fruitless, you brought freshly baked bread to leave on his doorstep with a note reading: Welcome in! Hope you're settling in alright. I’m just down the street if you need anything, and the door’s always open, with your name signed at the bottom. Three days later, you noticed the bread still sitting on his porch, the note nowhere to be seen. When smaller acts of kindness did not work—you tried many: more baked goods, offers of watching after Ellie while he went on patrol, bringing him what Tommy swore was his favorite drink, even offering a haircut after you noticed his visible irritation with the curls that relentlessly tickled his eyebrow—you settled for a wave or small smile when you passed him in town, which he only returned with a rotten scowl.

No matter what you did, he seemed to hate you. It well and truly pissed you off. 

You were not prone to violent outbursts, but Joel Miller incited anger in you like no one else. This was not your first incident with him, and you doubted it would be the last.

“I never asked you for a damn thing.”  

“Fuck you, Joel.” Your blood was practically boiling beneath your skin. “Enjoy being a miserable son of a bitch. I’m done.”  

“Oh, I plan on it, sweetheart.” You would have hit him if it weren't for his pretty face. You thought for a moment that a blackened eye or broken nose might take him down a notch, but another moment of realization washed over you: Tommy would be absolutely furious if you laid a hand on his brother when he technically did not deserve it. He was already sick of your bickering; he said as much himself, and you dared not chance the repercussions of a right hook to the side of Joel’s face.

Instead, you turned on your heel and left him in the middle of the street. You could not see the pain that welled up in his eyes as you turned away from him.

You did not speak to nor look in the direction of Joel for three weeks, and he did not catch even a glance of you.

For the first three days, he felt relieved. Since his arrival, he had hardly gone a single day without seeing your face or being met with a conversation he had not the slightest clue how to engage in, and to finally be without your presence felt peaceful. His morning walk was no longer disturbed by your upbeat chatter; he went to the Tipsy Bison and had a drink in peace; he sat on his porch in the evenings, strumming his guitar and sipping on a glass of whiskey without you strolling by and listening to the sounds of the strings. He settled down in Jackson, along with Ellie, three months ago and had finally been left alone. Ellie quickly befriended the other teenagers in the commune and spent most evenings getting into what he chose to believe was harmless fun (his paternal instincts screamed at him otherwise, but he knew she deserved to be a kid. Trouble came with the territory), and for three consecutive nights, he was unbothered. Not to say he disliked Ellie or her company; she was the most important thing to him, his reason for drawing breath. He loved her dearly, but silence had become a rare and cherished treat.

On the fourth night, Joel caught a glimpse of you on your front porch. It was a warm night, though it was unusually cool to be in the middle of June. You donned a pair of shorts and a not quite fitted shirt as you watered flowers and trailing plants hanging from the banister. He took a moment to admire the luscious greenery—he could recall you boasting of your skills in gardening, having been able to save many plants from the brink of death, and offering your assistance to the farmers in Jackson when their crops began to struggle. He also recalled the fact that you refused payment in return. (If you asked him, he would swear he only admired the flora adorning your porch; he simply paid no mind to you, nor how beautiful your hands looked as you poured water over the soil or the smile you flashed at a passerby on their nightly stroll. He did not care that it wasn't directed at him.)

On the ninth night, Joel made a trip to the Tipsy Bison. He had spent far too many evenings inside the house, according to Ellie. He desperately needed a change in scenery, but more than that, he wanted a drink. He briefly recalled the last instance of you knocking on his front door, unannounced, with an old-fashioned in your hand and a wide smile on your face that quickly disappeared when he declined the drink. When he went out on his porch later that evening, he found the same drink sitting on the outdoor table with a note covering the mouth of the glass to prevent insects from contaminating the beverage. As he sat at the bar all these weeks later, listening to a cacophony of music, aimless chatter, chairs groaning, and ice clinking, he ordered the same zesty cocktail while the handwriting scrawled on that note burned behind his eyelids.

(Tommy told me this was your favorite. Gotta say, they're not half bad. Hope you get to it before the ants do. Enjoy your night, door’s always open if you need anything.

P.S – I stashed away some bourbon I found from before, it’s yours if you want it. Not much of a whiskey girl.)

He stashed it away, along with the other handful of notes you had gifted him, though he was unable to discern why. He was never a sentimental guy.

On the eleventh night, he saw you for the first time since your outburst (aside from the brief glimpse of your weekly plant watering). It was another cool-for-June night, and he reckoned an evening stroll was preferable to listening to Ellie and Dina giggling upstairs. The summer air was crisp, and a warm breeze danced across his face, making his overgrown hair tickle his eyes. He thought a haircut was perhaps in order, though part of him did not trust Maria so close to him with scissors in hand. During his struggle to keep his hair away from his line of sight, Joel managed to overlook you entirely until he was a mere four or five feet away from you.

“What're you doin’ out here? It’s late.” You turned to face him for the first time in nearly two weeks, and Joel’s heart caught in his throat. How had he never noticed? The setting sun flashed brightly across your skin, filling your face with warmth and flooding your irises, and Joel realized that you were perhaps the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. Your hair blew freely in the breeze, though somehow more elegantly than his unkempt curls, which still seemed determined to obstruct his vision. He was unsure whether he saw a moment of sympathy on your face or if his mind played tricks on him, because you surely held no sympathy for him or his overgrown mane that he quite disrespectfully declined your assistance with.

“Don't see how that’s any of your concern.” You shot back, despite your eyes having softened.

“Just curious. Tryin’ to be friendly.”

“That's a first.” He sighed heavily at your statement, though he knew there was no denying it: “Sky looks pretty.” You were being far shorter with him than he was accustomed to. He could not blame you. Joel knew he had been cruel to you, though he could not explain why. Especially now, as you bask in the setting sun’s light dancing across your skin. You looked more peaceful than he had ever seen you, and guilt rips through his chest as he realizes this is the first time he’s seen you look so serene when conversing with him—it’s the first time he’s ever seen you so disinterested in speaking with him.

The guilt weighed heavier as he realized this was the first time he'd ever attempted a conversation with you.

“Yeah.” He agreed, though he could not draw his gaze from you to pay any mind to the sky.

On the fourteenth day, Joel realized he missed you. He missed your smile, the cadence of your voice, the melodiousness of your laughter; he missed the handwritten notes; the drinks he never asked for but you somehow knew he needed; the breads that he never bothered to bring in; he missed your attentiveness over Ellie; your inquiries about his day or if the house was cool enough for him. He missed you. Scraps of lined paper with blue ink were a poor substitute.

On the fifteenth day, Joel Miller realized what a pompous asshole he'd been.

On the sixteenth, he could do nothing but hate himself.

And the seventeenth.

And the eighteenth.

Straight through to the twentieth day.

On the morning of the twenty-first day, the self-hatred gave way to pure confusion. Why was he missing your attention so strongly? Why did he care that you were actively avoiding him? Why did he turn down Maria’s offer of a haircut, and why was he hoping he would open his door to a handwritten note ending with ‘The door’s always open’? Why did he turn down Tommy’s offer of whiskey? Why could he not get you off his mind?

“Dude, you have to talk to her.” Ellie stated as she shoved down her dinner (Joel tried to get her to eat slower and teach her table manners, but residual effects of food scarcity currently make such an intervention nearly impossible).

“What?” He snapped back.

She said your name as though it should have been entirely obvious from the start: “You’ve been a wreck for days. Just talk to her, man. Say you're sorry or something.”

“It ain't that simple,” he retorted.

“Why not?” Joel did not have an answer. He opted to glare at her, and Ellie took it as a victory, but not without a final say: “You didn't like me at first either, but look where we are now.” She said, gesturing to the kitchen. Before Joel could snap back a response, Ellie was darting from the table, yelling something he could hardly discern as she ran out the front door.

And on the afternoon of the twenty-first day, Joel found himself marching to your front door with two cups of coffee and a note with what he believed to be a poor excuse for handwriting in his back pocket. As he approached your porch, he stole a moment to observe your plants up close. He could not help but admire your dedication to something that would never be able to return the sentiment. His heart was in his stomach as he sat the cups down on your outdoor table and raised a hand to knock on your door. He thinks it stopped beating for a moment when you didn't answer.

Nevertheless, he left the note and coffee sitting for you outside.

Avoiding Joel Miller was a task easier said than done. 

He had never been accused of being sociable, outgoing, or even particularly friendly, but something about him drew you in. His thick, southern drawl constantly played through your head, despite having rarely heard it directed at you. The messy curls, ever grayer by the day, adorning his head were never far from the front of your mind, nor were his soft brown eyes. It seemed the harder you steered yourself away from him, the more he consumed your thoughts. 

In all actuality, you were done being angry with him within a few days. One conversation with Tommy shed much-needed light on the internal battle ever waging in his head, and you realized Joel Miller was far unlike any other member of the community (of course, he would be livid to learn that Tommy divulged such personal details to someone Joel considered to be a stranger). You also realized your best course of action would be to leave him alone; you came to see that Joel was no different from you upon your arrival in Jackson—confused, angry, and filled to the brim with trauma you felt hopeless to overcome, but above all, you were scared. After so long of living on the road, a house felt more like a grave; the walls felt like a prison cell, and the people may as well have been judge, jury, and executioner.

You had fully given up on whatever friendship you tried to strike up with him. Joel Miller wanted nothing to do with you, and it was something you were going to have to learn to live with, no matter how desperately your heart seemed to wish otherwise.

 So when he knocked on your doorstep one afternoon, looking utterly disheveled and anxiety-ridden, you were completely taken aback, so much so that it took you a full two minutes to remember how to turn the doorknob and greet him. By the time you did, he had already turned away and was halfway back to his house. You noticed the mug he carried in his hand only moments before noticing another sitting on your table, with still steaming coffee and a note sitting underneath the ceramic. 

Your heart raced as you read his endearingly messy handwriting: 

‘I’ve been an ass. Sorry it took me this long to figure it out. Could I make it up to you over dinner? 

P.S – that bourbon should mix well with the coffee. Give it a shot before you give it away.’ 

In a split second decision, you made your way over to his house with the coffee in hand, unfortunately losing a few splashes on the way due partially to uneven ground but mostly due to your nerves. You could not understand the effect he was having on you. Three weeks ago, you were ready to knock him into the dirt. Today, you anxiously run your fingers through your hair and smooth out the wrinkles in your shirt while cursing yourself for not taking the time to brush your teeth again before coming to his front door. However, there was no time to turn back or regroup because he opened the door almost immediately after you knocked. 

You were wholly unprepared for the sight of him. His hair had grown noticeably longer, and perhaps grayer as well. It was messy; undefined curls spread all across his forehead, but somehow he managed to look nothing less than perfect. He adorned himself with a fitted black shirt that hugged his arms in all the right ways and only highlighted the broadness of his shoulders. His skin was beautifully tanned, a perfect bronze that looked as though the sun itself lived inside of him. You had never seen his eyes look so soft and unguarded. You were unsure if it was the prolonged lack of contact or if you were initially blinded by anger, but Joel was handsome. Rugged, chiseled, slightly older, and strong (you wondered if he was strong enough to perhaps carry you, pick you up as though you weighed nothing, or perhaps throw you around a bit). 

He cleared his throat and broke you from your trance. “Oh, uh… hey. Sorry, hope I didn't bother ya by knocki–” 

“How does lunch sound instead?” Your words came out rushed, and you hoped they didn't betray how flustered you were. “Like, now. As long as you're free, I mean, I know you don't really have company often, and you have Ellie too…” 

“That, uh, that actually sounds real nice.”

 “Really?”

 “Yeah. C’mon in. Sorry for the mess.”

Six more weeks passed. 

Six more weeks of spontaneous lunches, dinners, late-night drinks, heavy conversations as a result, and countless cups of coffee 

Joel could not believe he had ever been so foolish as to refuse your companionship; he has spent so many days chastising himself over his stupidity. He wasted the better part of four months pushing you away at every turn. And despite it all, despite his thorniness, despite his brash personality and rusty conversational skills, despite believing he had nothing to offer you in return for your adoration aside from pain and tears, you never once made him feel like the monster he believed himself to be. He could not help but remember your plants and your willingness to love them despite them never reciprocating; they grew, they lived, and it was enough for you. You gave and gave and gave just a little more, and you never expected anything in return other than him, with all of his flaws, his traumas, and his burdens. He was all you wanted. 

Joel knew he wasn't good with these things. He knew what he was beginning to feel for you—it was an emotion he hadn't felt in many years at this point, not entirely foreign to him but not his mother tongue. He did not know how to express his gratitude or adoration for you, certainly not in the way that you deserved. 

What he did know was how to use your body—or, rather, his body—for your pleasure. Joel’s words often fell short, but his mouth and tongue still had a myriad of ways to tell you his affections: late at night when the town slept and Ellie was off with her friends, or in the early hours of dawn when the sun had barely begun to kiss the sky, or during midday when the heat was practically unbearable, Joel would show you just how special you were to him. With every flick of his skilled tongue, every movement of his hands, and every kiss he shared with you, he poured every ounce of his adoration into your body, and you responded with the sweetest moans his ears had ever been graced with. 

And now, as you lay wrapped up in a thin gray sheet with your clothes scattered along his bedroom floor, Joel floods you with devotion. He took his time working you up; he made you earn it this time around and turned you into a beautiful little mess below him before he ever touched you where you so desperately needed him. A piece of him wanted to keep you like this—you looked so goddamn pretty underneath him, practically begging for him to do anything more than what he was—but he could only be so selfish when you were just so good for him, and he could not keep himself from telling you so. 

Such a good girl.

You're doing so good for me, darlin’.

Look so pretty like this, baby. 

And every time you come undone below him, Joel cannot help but look at you so ardently; you were a sight to rival sunsets, mountains, and entire oceans, and you were his. And every time he slides into your warmth, he swears he finds heaven—if not inside of you, then beside you. You cry out his name as your nails scrape down his back—a delicious burn that only adds to his pleasure—while your legs wrap around his hips, silently begging him to stay exactly where he is and to never go too far. Hot kisses pepper down the side of your neck, and you tug at his finally trimmed curls, eliciting deep moans from his chest, creating a cacophony of sounds that neither of you maintain the mental clarity to silence—not when you are so wrapped up in each other, nothing else exists outside of the walls of his bedroom. 

And when he finishes, when his body goes rigid and he moans, practically whimpers, your name at a slightly higher pitch than his usual cadence, Joel finds serenity next to you in the after. As your eyes open and shut, and you fall in and out of sleep, and he traces featherlight patterns on the soft skin of your shoulder blade, Joel cannot help but believe he’s the luckiest man on Earth. 

You murmured something almost indistinguishable into his chest, but a few sounds carried crystal clear through the air—enough that he thought he could understand your intentions. 

He responded, “Me too.”

[eddiessluttywaist]

desiderium

an eddie munson series

AGELESS/BLANK/UNDER 18 BLOGS ARE NOT WELCOME TO INTERACT. PLEASE RESPECT MY RULES AND BOUNDARIES.

summary: eddie’s odd, forgotten childhood friend seeks him out when he needs her more than he realizes.

pairing: bsf!mechanic!bartender!eddie x eccentric!bsf!fem!reader

word count: 4,752 words

content/warnings: eventual smut so MDNI, angst, swearing, loneliness, mentions of drugs and crime, mentions of imprisonment, family issues, feeling unwanted, slight bullying, anxiety, nightmares, insomnia, depression, loss and grief, mentions of spit, super brief mention of alcohol and vomit, very brief mentions of breakups and inappropriate sexual relations (nothing reader or eddie are apart of). i think that’s it!

a/n: this is my first attempt at a slow burn series so i hope it’s good! i’m also trying a new setup with photos instead of gifs ^ i’ve seen a lot of other people do it and i think it looks really cool so! also creds to who owns and posted these photos! they’re not mine, i just made the collage!

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5

*

Eddie Munson had grown bitter since you last saw him. To be fair, the last time you saw him was when you were kids but still. You always knew him to be boisterous. Adventurer Eddie. Eddie with the weird ideas and cool drawings. Eddie who made you laugh until your stomach cramped and you would cry out that he was going to make you wet yourself.

You didn’t know it as a kid but even then he couldn’t catch a break from the world around him, and apparently it never stopped spiraling even when it beat him into a hollow shell covered in grease during the weekdays and alcohol—and occasionally vomit—on the weekends. He was worn down by his own worries that never seemed to cease and miserable stories of others admitting things they should’ve never said aloud. Sometimes the stories were fun or at least amusing, but mostly just depressing. This was Hawkins after all.

This wasn’t an Eddie you knew. Had someone told you that man in the garage wasn’t him, you simply would’ve nodded and kept going on your journey to find him.

But it was him, and you were positive he was meant to be back in your life. No matter how much it was hurting right now.

*

You didn’t know why he left at first. It was as if he ceased to exist, and sometimes—when you were all alone at night—you wondered if he had been a ghost. If he had been an imaginary friend, but surely not? He had his own home you hung out in. His own dad who let you guys eat too much junk food and stay up too late. He looked and sounded real when he would scarf down several bowls of honeycomb cereal with those slurping noises you always hated and would whine at him over. He felt real when you would play wrestle—and unfortunately very real when he won and would pin you down while slowly letting a string of saliva stretch down towards your face in an empty threat. He never really did it, but it was gross all the same, and when he’d let up you’d punch his arm as hard as you could.

One day, you asked if your parents remembered him and your father scoffed at the question while he stared at the newspaper, but at least he acknowledged you at all. Meanwhile your mother had all her focus on putting her earrings in and checking her makeup in the small mirror on a wall surrounded by family photos. Those framed pictures felt emptier than the looming threat of Eddie’s spit touching your face.

“Well his father’s a bottom feeder stuck in prison,” your dad flicked his paper to straighten it out again from where it had begun to bow backwards. “And his kid is probably no better. You’ll make other friends.”

You never understood why he was so cold about the loss of your only friend. You’ll make other friends. Yeah right. No one liked you. Everyone made fun of the way you sat idly on swings just to kick on occasion as you focused more on the book in your hands, or the way you’d squat down and give all your attention to a bug in front of you. Either a line of ants that you regarded with pure intrigue because you wondered how they always filed so neatly and did their best to stay together. Sometimes you left crumbs by them just to see if you could watch them pick them up. You’d watch snails and show them the attentiveness and respect you felt they deserved as they slowly trudged along—so determined, you thought. You’d watch butterflies and try to keep track of all the different kinds you saw. A lot of them were small and fluttery with those buttery white wings, but sometimes you saw a monarch and your eyes would grow large with excitement.

You cried when Zachary McKay would stomp on the anthills or teased you about how the French ate snails—something his dad would say was just more proof of how odd Europeans are. They were one of those arrogant “We love our Country!” households with an “I can do whatever I want—America is the land of the free” ideology and it showed in their unbridled and privileged ass of a child. You didn’t inform him that one Spring of the wasp nest that formed on the underside of the slide he frequented. Maybe it was mean, but you were content in silence over on your swing when you heard him crying out in pain one day. He developed a crush on you in high school that dramatically contrasted how he treated you in grade school—and even tried to make a move at Maddi Ecker’s 17th birthday party—but you could only think of the ants and the snails. You turned him down and he was horrible to you again.

You eventually did make some friends, other odds and ends throughout your school, but it wasn’t the same as it was with Eddie. Maybe it was childish and stubborn, but you could feel it deep in your gut that he was one of a kind. So you couldn’t let him go. All those years you ached for your friend who you considered lost. He always came up with wild stories and (when you were still relatively young) you imagined he had become a pirate and was lost at sea. Or became a gunslinger in the Wild West and didn’t draw fast enough. Maybe he went to slay dragons and wound up a burnt crisp of a human. That last one made you cringe the most, but he probably would’ve liked it the most. He loved mythical creatures the way you adored real creatures. By high school you weren’t as naive. You heard about his dad—caught with multiple charges of grand theft auto, a hit-and-run in one of said stolen cars, and dealing drugs. The hard shit. Not weed or shrooms. But the kind of stuff that really ruins lives.

You always thought Eddie had a good home. His dad didn’t hate him the way you were sure your parents hated you, and he had a nice house. It wasn’t a mansion or anything, but they really didn’t need anything beyond a one story and a sizable basement with only two of them. In hindsight, you supposed he couldn’t find a home in that childhood house anymore than you could with yours. Yours lacked love. His lacked a reliable source of income.

Over time you heard about the night with all the sirens and social workers. The night he turned into a spirit that had finally moved on—an imaginary friend that your growing mind ceased to conjure. He lived with his uncle over in Indiana, rather than your small town in Ohio. Even in your mid twenties, he flashed in your mind like a small blip on occasion and it still twisted your stomach.

You thought of asking if you should go to him whenever you remembered, but you thought you needed a sign. What if you showed up too early? And you messed up any possible grand plans? So you avoided indulging in questions about him to your tarot cards or over your pendulum map. On occasion you caved and just asked a simple question: is he safe? It was a yes every time you broke and just had to check up on him, and the answer reassured you for long enough until the next time the concern rose up to unbearable levels.

But then you started getting those dreams. Sometimes they were just memories playing from deep within the archives of your mind. Sometimes they were nightmares of yelling at someone to go away, only to realize it was Eddie far too late—and when you wanted to run after him to correct the mistake, you couldn’t move as quickly as you knew you were capable of.

It went on for about a month before you finally broke. Your eyes had snapped open, accidentally waking yourself in the middle of saying what you had been shouting to Dream Eddie out loud into your pitch black room. You glanced at the time. 11:11 PM. You felt your heart skip a beat before you shoved yourself out of bed. You had to take a moment to steady yourself against your bedpost from the sudden movement making you dizzy, but then you were flicking on the light and digging through your belongings. You didn’t even give yourself a chance to wipe away at the thin sheen of sweat over your skin from August heat mixed with a cheap fan that really didn’t make that much of a difference, and the stress from the events that had played deep in your mind while you slept.

With a shaky breath, you smoothed out your map on the floor where you were squatting, and steadily held your pendulum over the center. Does he need me? You finally asked and watched as the chain connected to a sphere of rose quartz slowly began to circle. It sped up and then began to dart in different directions before finally swinging back and forth between both of the “YES''s on the piece of cloth.

*

It took a little over a month to arrange your departure from your life in small town Ohio—not that small town Indiana was really all that different. You had briefly been back at your childhood house after your lease came to an end for the apartment you shared with a friend (who didn’t want to renew because she wanted to move in with her boyfriend, and you didn’t have the heart to tell her that the card spread you had laid out all pointed towards a breakup). All of this to say you didn’t have a lease or mortgage to tie you down. You certainly didn’t have a boyfriend (you haven’t had one since college), and you didn’t even like your job at the local mart so it was easy to give your two weeks. Your parents were just as sick of your presence now as when you were a child, and were willing to help you in every way possible to get you to just leave again. Had you not been so focused on your end goal, you might’ve taken a beat to really feel the hurt that always came with parents who only came to your aid when it meant keeping you at arm's length. But you couldn’t focus on it and really (for the sake of your mental health) you shouldn’t focus on it. All of your energy went towards Eddie who seemed so far, even if he was supposedly just a few hours and a state line away.

You didn’t have a place yet, which was a mistake on your part for rushing, but you could stay in a motel for the time being. The prices were pretty low anyways and the owner seemed pleasantly surprised by the sudden source of money and company. The lot belonged to her husband who had passed a few years back, so now it was only her running the place. Her daughter helped sometimes, but she had another job to focus on—only coming to help when the older woman was ill. So even though she appeared kind of grumpy at first, she really softened up to you when you wound up padding out of your room the first night and asked if she wanted to play Go Fish. You had been feeling antsy and lonely, and you were right to assume she felt lonely too.

Over the past week or so, you found a friend in that creaking, groaning motel. You did have a bit of a tendency to befriend the adults around you more often than kids your age when you were younger and it still happened now, apparently. A shrink at university pointed out once that it had to do with the lack of guardianship and guidance growing up. That you were trying to replace something that had always been missing, but you didn’t go back to him after a couple sessions. You didn’t like how patronizing he was, telling you things you already knew. And when you asked your dowsing rods if he was sleeping with any of his clients, the two pieces in your fists whipped open in a blatant “Yes!” But he wasn’t around now to make you feel low with his supercilious commentary and his notes that he always scratched down right in front of you. Your parents weren’t around to remind you of how utterly unlovable you can be. It was just you, Martha at Hawkins’ Blue Bird Inn, and hopefully a pleasant reunion on the horizon.

Today was the day to finally see Eddie, and Martha urged some confidence into you this morning before sending you on your way with the directions to the garage. No matter how many times you clarified he was just your childhood best friend, she got that sly look about her that always showed when an adult was all amused about the novice in front of them being openly or involuntarily blind to love.

So there you were. On a mild Wednesday morning in late September, standing before Thacher Tire after a lot of asking around, a lot of time flipping through Martha’s phone book, and even more odd looks. You let out a careful breath, doing your best to reassure yourself with the knowledge that the people you spoke to knew his name in the first place. He had to be here, and even if he wasn’t working today he should at least be employed here. Maybe you could be told when to come back to speak with him or where you could find him outside of work. Would they share something like that? People don’t tend to care about privacy in small towns, that’s why everyone knew (generally) where everyone else was. Maybe if you clarified that you’re an old friend, they wouldn’t treat you as a customer and tell you where he would be.

You were wringing your hands as you eyed the door in front of you. The glass looking in was worn from age and weather, clearly cleaned so people could see through it, but there seemed to be an aging to the corners where the rectangle of glass met the surrounding wood that couldn’t be scrubbed out. It felt like a portal looking into what could be, and you suddenly felt yourself getting anxious with what exactly meant could be. You had a knack for catastrophizing, and spiraled in all of the worst case scenarios until you were running back to your car and abandoning the lot.

*

“Trust me, it’s not as scary as it seems. Going for those intimidating opportunities is always better in the long run than letting ‘em slip away,'' Martha murmured to you before biting into the sandwich you brought her.

You bought typical fast food that you always came running back to when you were stressed, but she didn’t like the grease. You learned that over the past week when you brought up your bad habit, and her nose scrunched up at the mention of crappy burgers and overly salted fries. Instead you got her a tuna sandwich from the nearby marketplace, and she shared her big jug of iced, sweet tea with you.

“I haven’t seen him for over ten years…,” you sigh, toying with the crackling paper that was wrapped around your cheeseburger. “What if I’m the only one who clung onto our friendship? What if it’s stupid to him?”

“Mm, us women always do hold on longer,” she hummed thoughtfully and you refrained from your urge to correct her old-fashioned view of gender dynamics for the sake of staying on topic. “I still think you should go for it.”

“What if… what if it’s not what I think it’ll be? What if I’ve turned him into someone more fictional than Eddie in my mind, and when I’m faced with how he really is now I just… I dunno…wish I didn’t come here?”

“They never are what you conjure up. They’re always better up here,” she pointed a bony finger to her temple and you focused on one of the curls in her short gray hair for a second before bringing your gaze back to hers. “I still think you should go for it.”

You huff out a laugh at her repetition, smiling sadly to yourself as you look down at your hands and notice the thin sheen of grease on them. Maybe Martha’s right. Maybe this food is gross. You grab a few napkins from the brown paper bag and wipe at your fingers.

“Just think of it this way: is it worse knowing the truth or worse never knowing?”

*

Eddie had been having a shit day. Actually he had been having a shit week. If he let himself truly indulge in his pessimism, he’d be acknowledging that he’s altogether just had a shit life, but he was trying not to fall into that trap. It would make him the kind of depressed and bitter that made him snap at others and then feel guilty about it—which only made him feel worse about himself.

He hasn’t been sleeping well, a sudden flare up of his insomnia throwing off his circadian rhythm. He thought with how busy his schedule was that he’d knock out the second his head hit the pillow, but he only seemed to be exhausted until he finally laid down. Then was when his thoughts randomly chose to run and his heart would race with the sudden surge of anxiety-inducing thoughts. He was beginning to feel so overwhelmed by everything that his eyes burned with the beginnings of hot tears but he wiped at them carelessly with the heels of his hands before they could become too real. In his mind, they didn’t exist until they fell.

Eddie ached with exhaustion that only seemed to let up when he could actually get a shot at some rest. He ached with loss and grief. He ached with pure misery and painful seclusion and a silent trailer—besides the occasional buzz of electricity through his lamp that he turned back on when he realized he wouldn’t be sleeping anyway, or the groan of the old mobile home settling against its cinder blocks. The upcoming season made itself known through the ever growing chill that formed at night and occasionally blew through every crack and crease of the trailer, making him shiver and pull his blankets up before inevitably growing hot again and kicking them away.

He missed his friends that he rarely saw. Everyone is busy nowadays. He missed Wayne who… god, he couldn’t even think about it. He missed Chrissy who lit up his world Spring of ‘86 just for them to drift apart. People seemed to drift from him a lot. People seemed comfortable with forgetting him and giving a brief call only when they got a pang of guilt at any reminder that they were getting awfully close to leaving him behind. But who was he to drag them down? It was heart-aching enough to live the way he did sometimes, let alone when people acknowledged just how heart-aching it was. Sometimes he even missed his dad, but he always avoided thinking too hard about him before it could sink his mood to a new level that would be hard to crawl out of.

He hadn’t been able to fall asleep Wednesday night until early into Thursday morning. He settled into a deep rest around 4 AM just to be abruptly woken up by his 6:30 alarm to make sure he was at Thacher’s by 7:00.

“Fuck off…,” Eddie groaned out loud and slammed his fist down onto the alarm clock, never lifting his face from where it was planted right against his worn pillow.

He laid there for what felt like forever, but was really only a few minutes before he finally peeled himself out of his spot. Forcing himself from the comfort of his old mattress was never easy, especially when he couldn’t rely on any excuses he made up as a teenager to just flop right back into his bed. He had to get up. He had to work.

He went to make his usual toast just to see there was only the end piece left in his loaf of bread, and let out a guttural groan of frustration as he tilted his head back. He forgot to stop at the store. Grumbling a bitter so that’s how today’s gonna go under his breath, he shoved the sad excuse for a slice of bread into the toaster and then began looking through the kitchen for something else to satiate him until lunch.

He wound up eating what was left in his jar of peanut butter with a spoon after slathering the small piece of toast with jelly. He didn’t have time to clean a travel mug (which he forgot to clean last night) so he took a regular one with him on his commute, and wound up dumping his coffee all over himself mid-sip when he had to stop short for a kid suddenly biking across the road. The young teen laughed at the close call and made his way to the other side of the street. Eddie glanced down at his drenched t-shirt and coveralls, releasing his third irritated groan of the morning while he rolled his eyes up to the ceiling of his van before focusing back on the road and moving his foot to the gas. He focused on taking deep breaths as he gripped the steering wheel and made his way to the shop.

Thankfully, Linda had already started a pot of coffee in the break room which he happily drank and patted at his wet clothing with one of the blue shop towels. Staining was inevitable and it really didn’t matter with the coveralls anyways, but that didn’t mean he had to be damp. Taking that moment at the start of his shift helped with his mood, but the amount of customers bitching over the phone about how long it was taking to get their cars back were steadily draining him back into a surly mood. The most he had to look forward to and keep himself from unnecessarily snapping at someone was the fact that it was almost the weekend—and yes he would still have to work nights at The Hideout, but at least he didn’t have to get up early.

*

Never knowing was decidedly worse.

You had concluded this after ruminating on it all night—with and then without Martha’s help. And despite all of your anxieties that were just barely buried under the surface, you made yourself go to the garage again.

An obnoxious, tinny bell sounded and a dull voice said from behind a counter: Welcome to Thacher Tire. What can we do for you?

You approached carefully as if you moved too quickly, the depressing gray and beige setting around you—which held far more meaning for you than just fixing cars—would suddenly melt away and you’d wake up.

“Do you know where I could find Eddie Munson?” you asked in a soft voice, and the woman obnoxiously chomping at her gum looked up at you over the top of her glasses before looking back down at the paperwork in front of her.

“He’s in the garage. Is he working on your car?”

Your heart jumped and although you hated to lie, you did.

“Yes,” you said probably too quickly, but it seemed nothing could get this woman to care.

“Wait over there, please,” she spoke in a voice that was just as greige as her place of work.

You thanked her meekly and shuffled over to one of the worn, faux leather and hard plastic seats. The room smelled of cheap pine air fresheners and the potent combination of oil, and that specific rubber scent of brand new tires. The space with the front desk and the waiting area was small enough to be cramped if it was a busy day, but since you were the only visitor at the moment you didn’t have to be confronted by the full potential of such limited space. You toyed with your hands and tried to pay attention to the fuzzy television in one corner of the room, but you couldn’t help listening in on the receptionist’s call.

“…’s a girl here to talk to ya… uh-huh… yeah I know… uh, no I don’t think so. I doubt it. Her voice is different from the one that keeps calling about the Ford. Might be though... ‘Kay.”

You anxiously wiped your sweaty palms over your jeans as you heard the clunk of hard plastic settling back into its cradle. What if he didn’t remember you? What if he did, but didn’t care? What if he thought you were weird for showing up? What if he grew up to be someone who stomps on anthills?

Your head shot up at the sound of a door opening and then closing from the back, and a man in filthy coveralls approached the woman behind the desk. He had messy, curly bangs settled on his forehead and the rest of his long hair was in a low ponytail. He was sweaty and clearly exhausted as he wiped at his forehead and left a swipe of grease in his wake, speaking quietly to the receptionist before making his way over to you. The closer he got, the better you could smell the grease and sweat and bitter coffee, but it didn’t deter you. What truly threw you were the circles under his eyes and the sort of pale cast to his skin that people got when they were fatigued or ill. You weren’t sure why a part of you expected to see an eleven year old kid approach you with a god awful buzz cut and big brown eyes, even after fourteen years.

This was it. This was your moment. The time to reclaim your best friend, and have the greatest person you had ever met back into your life. Why was your throat suddenly so dry? You swallowed anxiously and then parted your lips to speak and-

“Miss, I know you’re waiting on your car to be fixed before the weekend—I promise I’m working as quickly as I can.”

You tried not to cringe at the use of “miss” and looked up at him with wide, sad eyes wondering why he didn’t see an almost ten year old girl with a messy braid in her hair that she did by herself, complaining at him to chew with his mouth closed.

“I lied,” You said bluntly and the man stared at you in a way that felt blank and still despite his wonderment.

“I-I don’t have a car here. I just wanted to talk to you.”

He eyed you curiously, his hands slowly wiping onto an old rag. It looked like it had been used so many times, you doubted it was even picking up any filth on his hands but just moving it around instead. He was clearly thrown off by the sentiment which brought a sort of youthfulness to his face in that moment of curiosity before his features hardened.

“Listen. I’m sure whatever prank you have conjured up is hilarious, but I’m tired and trying to do my job.”

“No-- no, no,” you tried to clarify, shooting up from your seat. “I—I-”

But he was already swiftly stomping away from you towards the back, muttering to the receptionist with a quick and surely rude comment about you on his way. You were moments from being politely asked to leave, you’re sure, but the woman hesitated with a gentle expression when she saw you approach her with glossy eyes.

“Could you please just give him this?” you asked in a soft voice that you did your best to keep even, but of course it wobbled just enough to be humiliating. You could feel the heat in your face and (even worse) the moisture in your eyes so you did your best to avoid eye contact.

You outstretched your arm and she met you halfway with a nod, allowing you to drop the old friendship bracelet into her palm.

[apatheticrater]

i think you posted or reblogged a picture of mike faist that was giving professor! art and mentioned how he kinda looked like spencer reid and that reminded me of something lol (if this wasn’t you, i’m so sorry. my memory has been shit lately 😭)

when my best friend was in high school, there was a teacher who started in the middle of the year who also looked like spencer reid (how i remembered this lol) and he and this other teacher were CONSTANTLY flirting with each other. got so bad that because her and other students knew they were both single, they started telling each of them to ask each other out. they did. and now they’ve been engaged for sometime

so it got me thinking of being a teacher at a school and teacher!art randomly coming in the middle of the year. you’re the only two teachers around your age and constantly flirting with each other in that subtle way teachers do, except everyone knows and just thinks you should get together already…

You were correct!! I was referring to this gorgeous photo of him <3

I also made this into headcanons because it's what felt the most right to me when trying to write it. I left reader's gender and what type of school they teach at somewhat vague as well <3

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆

Teacher Art x Teacher Reader headcanons

Art was a newer teacher, having come in the middle of the year after the usual history teacher went on maternity leave

It was his first year as a full-time teacher, having only done substitute work previously

You were an English teacher whose classroom shared a wall with Art’s, and you were his first friend on the staff

You had already been working at the school for two years at this point, so you knew your way around and the students pretty well by now, making you the perfect candidate to give Art advice and show him around

You were both on the younger side of the spectrum in terms of the teachers around the school, and you were closer to your students, making you the perfect victims of their jokes and sass (when appropriate)

You guys quickly became good friends and after two months of Art working at the school you guys started to flirt with each other heavily

Whether it was started as jokes between close friends or due to genuine attraction to each other, no one knew, but either way, your students had a field day with it

Every time either of you would enter each other's class, whether to ask a question or grab something you needed/left behind earlier in the day your students would start be little shits making jokes or ‘ooooo’ing at you two, gossiping about things like “did you see how Mr. Donaldson looked at them?” and “Have you noticed that they smile at Mr. Donaldson in a completely different way than they do everyone else?” and so on

It becomes such a running joke around the school that it’s something every student talks about at least once in class, which leads to your boss having to ask you guys to, ‘please tell the students to stop talking about your relationship’

Despite not being able to talk about you guys in class anymore, they still try to set you guys up, especially when they get the confirmation that you’re both still single

It’s almost like that one plotline from ‘Clueless,’ when Cher and Dionne try to set up their two teachers by tricking them into situations together and making them think they both like the other

They keep coming up with excuses that force you guys into the same room; Friends texting each other while one of them is in your class and the other is in Arts, coincidentally both of them need something printed and their computers just ‘won’t work’

They tell you that Art said your hair looked nice today, they give Art a small gift and say it was from you (even though it’s so obvious those things aren’t true because you could’ve walked to each other's class instead of having the students do it for you)

They keep telling you guys to ‘just ask each other out already!’ saying ‘you already flirt constantly’ among other things

What they don’t know is that you and Art already are dating and have been since months before he started, you just found it too funny to not mess with the students and let them try to matchmake you two, plus it showed they cared about you guys

They were shocked the first time one of them saw you leave the school in the same car, you kissing Art's cheek before the car pulled out of the lot

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆

[azriona]

Doctor Who compilation bookbinding project

Okay, continued the bookbinding this afternoon, and this time paid slightly more attention to the signature order, so now it's all sewed up in the right direction. The textblock isn't quite done--it still needs endpapers and headbands-- but that's going to have to wait because I don't have the endpapers I want.

Anyway, I thought I'd post progress pictures for those interested, and because I realized I haven't taken progress photos of any of the projects thus far. This is the third of my own fics that I've been binding. I'm not doing too much new with this one, but I still haven't figured out the cover so I might try something with that. Anyway, this compilation is of my Doctor Who fics (Pages and Left Behind are the main ones, and then an assortment of shorter fics).

(Confession: it has been so long since I read Left Behind, and I have been so deep in the MCU lately, that I read the opening to this story and my first thought is, "Tony Stark is in this here?!" 😂😂😂😂)

So the first part of fanbinding actually creating the pdf for printing. This probably takes up the most time, because I'm doing a shit-ton of trying to coax Word to do what I want it to do. Luckily, I learned how to do this when prepping Pen's books for printing, and I've gotten a lot better and faster at it over the years. I don't know that I'm any good at it, really--I see some layouts that are frankly amazing and inventive and creative and I wish I could think of those designs, but hey, I think I do all right. You can't see on the above page (it's too light) but there's the faint design of Gallifreyen behind the chapter title there. I also played a lot with using backgrounds on the main title pages:

Okay, those show up better. I'm trying to decide if I want to trim the pages so that you don't have that blank outline around the title page decoration. (Word won't let you print all the way to the edge of the page, which I guess is the drawback of home printing? Eh.) The advantage of trimming would be that I get that nice flat side to the textblock; right now it's that choppy sort of look. Which I don't mind, honestly, but at some point I gotta learn how to cut those pages nice and even.

The deets: printed on ivory letter-sized paper, folded in half. The entire file is a nice solid 300 pages or so.

Anyway, with the signatures printed, it was time to put it together. This time, I had an awl-guide and cradle that I had 3-D printed at the library based on a design from Thingiverse. CHECK THAT BABY OUT. Mine is white and gold (because I told the library I did not care what color they used). I have to say, I love it. Made cutting holes soooooo much easier and faster and perfect and painless. Support your local library, folks, they have all sorts of cool toys.

Sewing it together: I'm continuing to use a kettle-stitch, because it's easy and fast and previously I had trouble keeping the stitches even and tight. I think I finally figured out how to do both now, both a factor in the holes being consistent (thank you, awl guide & cradle) and just paying better attention to the tension in the thread. This is probably the thickest I could go without those strappy thing I see some of the thicker tomes using (I cannot remember the name and you do not want to know what I found when I typed "strappy things" in Google; it sure didn't pertain to bookbinding).

FEAST YOUR EYES ON THE GORGEOUS, PEOPLE.

So that's where we're leaving it; I have a pretty good idea what endpapers I want to use, I just have to get back to JoAnn's to get them. I have ideas about the cover, but I'm not sure how to make it happen, so I'll let that ferment and switch back to one of the other projects. More later.

[kichona-s]

Hereby requesting facial structure rant

ok for those who dont know this is reference to my post where i cry about george's beautiful fucking face at 2am

this is pretty fucking specific and also pretty long so i wont clog your tl with it so its under the cut

OK FOR GEORGE. Personality and everything else aside he has my most favourite face out of the entire grid (sorry guanyu) BECAUSE. LOOK AT HIM. THERE SO MANY NICE ANGLES AND ITS SO NICE AN LONG AND HIS CHEEKBONES??? THE JAW??? his nose also fits his face really nicely ok but the key is to not look at him head-on you need to get the side profiles and the 3/4 views because FUCK. i love so much theres so many points of interest for his face also his chin juts out really strong which looks lowkey kinda funny in some pictures but it really adds to the whole angleley bony face structure he has going on anyway. george my number 1 fav face the only thing im not a big fan of are his ears rip theyre too round for the whole angular coherency BUT THATS FINE IDC

MOVING ON TO MAX VERSTAPPEN (this is not done in a ranking order btw i havent drawn the whole grid so i cant properly rank everyone) ok like im gonna be real with yall. i thought he was fucking ugly as shit when i first got into f1. like i looked at his photo and was like ??? ig he wins a lot lmao OK BUT THEN LIKE A FEW MONTHS AGO I KEPT GETTING MAX STUFF ON MY TIKTOK FYP AND I WAS LIKE. HOLD ON. HIS PERSONALITY KINDA CUTE ASF. ok yea basically i gaslit myself into loving his face (either that or charles possessed me). for max im way too drawn to his lips (@loquarocoeur bro u know this lmfao) and ngl anyone who read the notes in my face breakdown u could probably tell but i love his lips??? so much??? gonna keep it pg here but he should suck on more things other than the twisty redbull can straw things

still on max but i really like how fucking square his face is. its so refreshing to draw. also did you notice that he has a small ass forehead?? bc he does. he looks wrong when i draw his forehead too big its kinda funny (looking at YOU oscar). i also really like his ear shape? it bends pretty low so it looks kinda cute and i try to make sure i draw it properly lmfao. special note to when hes looking down but then his eyes look up and holy smokes it brings out his nose bridge and the eyebrow bone thing SO WELL???!! anyway i want to eat him

for oscar uh. his face is oval? i guess?? after all the oscars ive drawn youd think i have more to say but i dont :( his face is pretty and also sometimes a pain to get right but other than that nothing too much for me to rant about. OK BUT HIS HAIR??? LOVE HIS HAIR I LOVE THE FUCKING SWOOPY THING IT DOES (it also makes my life WAYYY easier bc i can just draw the swoop and most people know its oscar yay for good character design). also everyone is right he does look like a cat. a cat with a massive fucking forehead. also whenever i draw him i remember that hes only three years older than me and its pretty scary ngl! thats hitting a bit too close to home for my taste! hes cute though and ive definitely drawn some banger oscars so one love

NOW FOR LANDO WHOOOOIMABOUTAMAKEANAMEFORMYSELFHERE! ok firstly his face is like a V so i always need to remind myself to bring the sides of his face in more compared to oscar. also did you know his eyes are a bit lopsided? theyre on different parallel lines im telling you go look at the 2023 official driver photos its So Bad i want to cry (that was also my first introduction to him so. i thought he was fucking ugly too). his face is really interesting to draw especially with his eyebrows that fade in and out and are really fucking bushy in the middle LMAO. do i love his face? nah. is it fun to draw? yea pretty fucking fun ESPECIALLY because he somehow suits all the funny shit i wanna put him in like dresses and skirts and bikinis (and also @cx-boxbox is an enabler istg half of the landos ive drawn probably wouldnt exist without her) also his ears look pointy from certain angles and i think thats really cute so i always draw them pointy :))

for charles uh i dont like drawing his hair its a pain. nice face i guess

LASTLY MY ONE AND ONLY!! THE MAN WHO BREAKS ME OUT OF ARTBLOCK REPEATEDLY!!!! ZHOU GUANYU!!!!!!! he's just very cute to me i love his stupid fucking eyebags AND ALSO THE WAY HE SMILES IS ADORABLE I WANNA PASS OUT :(((((( i dont draw his non-chibi version as much bc whenever i do i feel the need to make him Perfect (because hes my fav yknow) so i tend to just. not do it. unless i need to cure my artblock then i draw him so idk hes like my pc reset button. anyway i love zhou and i love looking at pictures of zhou and if he doesnt get a seat next year i will probably cry. also shoutout to sweetcorn the bestest most adorablest cat (wins out jimmy and sassy btw i dont care sweetcorn is the best fight me)

comments questions and arguments are all encouraged i stand firm in my stances (for now at least we'll see again 6 months later)

[hugshughes]

cardigan J. Drysdale

Jamie Drysdale x fem!reader

synopsis - when you and jamie get married you can’t help but look back on every single memory, good and bad, that led you two to this moment.

wc - 2.5k

contains - honestly mostly fluffy, some angst flashbacks but it’s a cute fic mostly, cursing, shouting, kissing, oh reader has a sister who is her maid of honor, i think that’s it (as always lmk!!)

an - i was about to post this yesterday but i fell asleep sorry lol. i’ve had this practically done for like a week but i kept thinking it wasn’t good enough. im actually really excited for this one! i might’ve not made Jamie and bad as James is but we all know Jamie would never do anything like James so. i love the folklore triangle SO SO MUCH (betty especially my favorite) so this one was so fun to write! i hope you love it!

-

Today was the best day of your life, your wedding day. You married your best friend since 8th grade, Jamie. You were finally Mrs. Drysdale, Jamie had been waiting for this moment since he realized he was going to marry you in his senior year of high school.

The ceremony was absolutely gorgeous, Jamie cried during your first look and then again when you came down the aisle. He looked perfect, a navy blue suit matching the color of the ribbon on your bridesmaid's bouquets. Trevor was tearing up next to his best friend as you came down the aisle, his grey suit matching with the groomsmen.

Now Trevor’s suit jacket is long gone, thrown over his chair as he dances to an old 90s song in the middle of your reception hall. He had created a dance circle and brought most of your guests, even the elderly, into it. That was also where your husband was dragged to at the moment. Now you were sitting at your dinner seat, looking through the gift your sister gave you as she sat next to you.

Your sister had been your best friend since you were born, her being 3 years older than you. Now, she held your hand as you teared up turning the page of the photo book she’d made you.

vintage tee, brand new phone. high heels on cobblestones. when you are young they assume you know nothing.

The first picture there ever was of you and Jamie, sitting next to each other on your parents’ old couch, his arm wrapped cautiously around you at your 14th birthday party, when he was still just your friend boy. He’d gotten you a new shirt. Well, it was not new, but it was a thrifted vintage shirt you’d been looking for for months.

You’d also gotten a new iPhone 7, amazing at the time. It was a phone you texted Jamie on every night before bed, when during the school year you’d have to leave it on the counter of your kitchen till the next morning. It was crazy to think that those 2 little babies were married now.

sequin smile, black lipstick. sensual politics. when you are young they assume you know nothing.

You laughed at a different picture, remembering when you were almost 16, thinking you were hot shit with your dark lipstick at homecoming. Your beautiful boyfriend of over a year with his shining smile wrapped around your side.

You guys had shocked most when at 17 they asked how long you’d been together, and you guys answered with 2+ years. You guys were so young for how long you were committed to each other.

but i knew you, dancin’ in your Levi’s. drunk under a street light, i. i knew you.

You flipped a few pages, seeing a photo of you and Jamie (taken by your sister), slow dancing in the kitchen, him just in his jeans, bare back muscles on display in the photo. Another photo, you and Jamie, holding hands and running down the sidewalk of Anaheim, both quite tipsy as Trevor filmed you two, being the DD. It all was so surreal. You’re married, to Jamie, the boy you’d loved since forever.

hand under my sweatshirt. baby, kiss it better, i. and when i felt like i was an old cardigan, under someone’s bed. you put me on and said i was your favorite.

A picture of the night you and Jamie got back together. You had broken up for all of 2 and a half weeks when you were both 18. After almost 4 years of being together, it was overwhelming to think of him moving to Anaheim, so far from you.

He came to your place the night before he left, pleading with you to just try and make it work. It didn’t take much begging from him, you were always gonna be his. The way he made you feel, was like no other. His most special girl, as Jamie would put it.

The picture was a snap you’d sent to your sister, a selfie of you and Jamie both crying but laughing, with a caption “guess who’s fav couple is #backtogether!!!!” Your sister loved the photo so much, one of her favorites.

a friend to all is a friend to none. chase two girls, lose the one. when you are young they assume you know nothing.

A picture of you two when you were 16, he’d just won a game with his junior team and your moms needed a picture of you two together when he got off the ice. He’s still in all of his gear, you’re in one of his sweatshirts that had his name and number on the chest. His arm is around your waist, you’re both smiling from ear to ear with rosy cheeks. You remember that night, it was your first argument.

There were some girls, presumably player’s sisters, who were waiting around the locker room at the end of the game. Jamie was the first boy to come out of the lockers, and the girls decided to try and sink their teeth into him.

Jamie was trying to get them off of him, all he wanted was to see you. When you finally came over to the locker rooms, all you saw was Jamie with his back to you, and two girls rubbing his arms with big smiles on their faces, telling him how amazing he played.

If Jamie’s back hadn’t been turned from you, you would’ve seen his uncomfortable and upset face, and him telling them to get off of him. But you didn’t see that, what you did see broke your little 16-year-old heart.

You knew in the back of your head you probably should’ve waited to see what his reaction was but you couldn’t fight the ache in your chest when you saw it. You practically ran out to the car, texting your mom that you didn’t feel well and wanted to go home before your planned dinner with the Drysdale’s.

You got a few questions from your parents, but you just told them you felt sick. And you did, to be fair, just not in the way they assumed. Jamie texted, his parents told him how you felt sick and he was concerned. Your answers to his texts concerned him more though, you were being vague, a little mean, even. You’d avoided Jamie for almost a week before he came over when he knew you’d be home and questioned you.

His first thought was that you were really sick, but he also knew how you got when you were sick. If you were sick you always wanted Jamie however you could have him, in person, over text, on Facetime, anything. He knew it was something else. His suspicions were proven correct when he barged into your room, and you were lying on your bed texting, perfectly well.

He argued with you a little bit, just upset that you were telling him you were sick to not see him. He was almost embarrassed about it. When the truth finally came out, Jamie immediately softened, feeling bad that you thought he would give any girl other than you the time of day. When he told you what really happened, you felt so stupid. You apologized over and over. Jamie assured you he understood, but asked you to please tell him if something was ever bothering you.

but i knew you. playing hide-and-seek and giving me your weekends, i i knew you, heartbeat on the high line once in twenty lifetimes, i. and when i felt like i was an old cardigan, under someone’s bed. you put me on and said i was your favorite.

You were Jamie’s sanctuary, his place of peace when his world was upside down. Because of how long you’d known each other, you both could be kids again while together. Your moms bet that you would get married the minute they both found out you were dating. At 14, they both knew that you two were forever. They could see the soulmate connection you two have.

You made each other feel new, while also reminding each other of the good in the past. You came to every Otters game, then when he was drafted almost every Ducks game. Your parents weren’t skeptical even for a second when you said you were going to move to Anaheim and go to school there. They knew Jamie had you, and that you were in good hands.

to kiss in cars and downtown bars, was all we needed. you drew stars around my scars, but now i’m bleedin’.

Jamie had been there through everything. Every panic attack, every bad day, every fight with your parents. He was always there to hold you and whisper sweet nothings to you. He never expected anything from you except for your love, and that wasn’t a hard ask.

Jamie was the most loving and lovable person in the world. He knew what to say and when to say it. He was always able to make everything better, he was everything everywhere all the time.

cause i knew you, steppin’ on the last train. marked me like a bloodstain, i. i knew you. tried to change to the ending, Peter losing Wendy, i. i knew you. leavin’ like a father, runnng like water, i. and when you are young they assume you know nothing.

During those few months when you couldn’t tell what the future of your relationship looked like you were so scared. Pretty much everything you’d done in the past year or so had been for Jamie. Finding a school near Anaheim, moving across the country to Anaheim, trying to be the most supportive girlfriend you could.

Jamie was unlike himself for those months. You were scared the NHL would have forever changed the boy you fell in love with. He was just, different. You couldn’t tell if he was just getting older or if he felt like he had to act older to be respected in the league.

The night Jamie found you broken down is the night he realized he had almost ruined the one consistently good thing he had. He has apologized for weeks after, he felt so terrible and it made you feel even worse, seeing him tearing himself up over something you were past.

but i knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss. i knew you’d haunt all of my what-ifs. the smell of smoke would hang around this long, ‘cause i knew everything when i was young. i knew i’d curse you for the longest time. chasin’ shadows in the grocery line. i knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired, and you’d be standin’ in my front porch light.

You knew no matter what happened to your relationship he would always be “the 1”. He had been your everything since you were 14 years old, there was no way you could ever get over him.

Jamie had realized his mistake of putting you on the back burner a few weeks before he was able to admit it. He had had a bad game, like really bad. He had multiple penalties, hadn’t done a great job leading the defense, or assisting the offense.

After the game, he was pissed with himself, but his best friend came over to him, patting him on the back and saying “Go home and relax. You’ve been so tense lately. Go be with your girl and chill, you definitely need it.”

It confused him, all season he’d been working harder and harder than ever before, and he assumed when all that work wasn’t helping, he had to push himself even more. He never realized that his best successes came from when he was relaxed when he had been talking to you before, when he could see you in the crowd.

You had come to as many games as you could all season. But one night, after a fight over God knows what, Jamie told you not to bother coming to his game the next night, and you hadn’t gone since.

Jamie had questioned his love for hockey at times during his rookie season. He’d even thought about what his life would look like without it. He never had to question one thing though, that you’d be there no matter what he did. He’d thought about his future, always just knowing you were gonna be there.

Jamie realized that you weren’t always gonna be there if he didn’t care for you like he should. He realized you could probably find another guy who would bend over backward to do everything you ever wanted for you. He realized he had to start doing that again, because you’d done everything for him in the past year, and never asked for anything in return.

and i knew you’d come back to me. you’d come back to me. and you’d come back to me. you’d come back.

You didn’t realize tears were running down your face until your sister wiped them away, tilting your head up to look at her. She then nodded to the side, and you followed her gaze, seeing your husband standing next to you. Your husband. His smile drops when he sees your tears.

“Hey woah baby, are you alright?”

You sniff and nod, laughing at yourself.

“Yes, just my stupid sister made me cry with her present.”

He laughed and shook his head at your sister, saying something about not making the most important girl of the night cry. Your sister stood up from her seat, going to pick up your niece who had fallen asleep at one of the tables. You turned back to Jamie after your sister had left, smiling at him with glossy eyes.

“You tired pretty?”

“A bit, but I guess I could dance with you a little more. At the end of the day, you are my husband.”

He nodded at you with amusement, letting out an “oh yeah?” and grabbing your hand to pull you from your seat, smashing his lips into yours. You held his face while he held your waist. You got a few whoops from your wedding party, calling you over to the dance floor, a Taylor Swift song had just come on, and Trevor was about to go crazy.

When you pulled away from each other, you both had the most lovesick smiles on your faces, intertwining hands and running over to the dance floor, jumping around with the people you loved most, shouting the lyrics to Cruel Summer.

Jamie was always gonna be yours, no matter what happened.

and when i felt like i was an old cardigan, under someone’s bed. you put me on and said i was your favorite.

-

i’m making a taglist for this if anyone would like that! comment or send an ask if you’re interested!

[bugbro]

Important Internet Safety PSA!

This post is specifically targeted at minors.

Hi kiddos! I'm making this post to remind all regressors on here that they should be extra sure to stay safe online!

For a while now, I've seen minors posting things that are not safe 🙅 but anyone can benefit from following these tips. Especially those who regress, and can be mentally children at times, should be extra cautious online.

Warning! : mentions of potentially triggering topics in relation to online safety, stranger danger, etc. Please only read when big, not regressed!

Read Under The Cut ⬇️

Things Minors Should Not Share Online:

1) Your Real Name.

Never share your full name online. Your first name is less dangerous, but if you can, I would still go by pseudonym (Ex: Sunny, Lambie, Tiny, Bear, Baby Bat, etc.) or fake name. Your name may feel innocent, but personal information is very important.

2) Your Location.

This one feels obvious, but more people do it than you think! Yes, I mean do not share your address...but I also mean: Do not share what school you attend. Do not share what state you live in. Do not share what city you live in.

3) Your Age.

Do not tell anyone that you are a minor. People online should not know that you are a child. As a child, you are especially vulnerable to being targeted by people online.

Age regressors in general are pretty commonly targeted by p/redators online, but stating you're a minor won't make you more safe from them - it will make those predators more likely to want to message you.

Remember to also not share your birthday! Your exact birth date is personal info. If you wish to share birthday stories, gifts, etc, or tell people of your birthday, be broad. Mention it's your birthday month at the beginning/end of the month :) rather than the exact day.

4) Your Triggers.

People online should not know what specific things trigger you. This information can be used against you. Yes, this includes information in DNIs.

If you must have a DNI, be generic.

"DNI if you post kink, blood, eating disorders, transphobia, these things trigger me." is too much personal information. This is just a list of things that trigger you. People online should NOT know this information. ❌ ❌

❤️ Generic DNI examples:

"DNI if your blog is unsafe for children"

"DNI if you post N/S/F/W content."

"DNI if your blog is k/i/n/k, c/g/l, or NSFW." ❤️

Remember to use your block button liberally, for anyone who makes you uncomfortable.

5) Photos of yourself.

There are multiple reasons why posting photos of yourself, as a minor, may not be a good idea.

First, regression is very stigmatized. Choosing to connect your face to something so stigmatized is a very big decision, one that can be difficult to make at a young age. The internet is forever, and it's very important to consider how you might feel about these photos later in life.

Second, regression is SFW, but p/redators don't care. While the pictures of you with a paci, or you in a diaper may be completely innocent and nonsexual, bad people can still access them. This doesn't mean you can never post photos - but waiting until you're old enough to really understand the risks is a good idea.

In general, photos of your regression can be unsafe but...you can share photos without you in them! Pictures of your snacks, or a toy can be nice to share. Just make sure there's no personal, or identifying info in your pictures :) and then show off your cute drawings or toys.

Personal information is very precious. Be very careful with who you share it with! If you are an adult, you have the knowledge to make the decision on whether or not you think it's a good idea to share this information. But if you are a child, you're usually not old enough to understand what sharing personal info can mean.

I know a lot of these may feel really restricting. You might think "isn't that a little much?" and yes, they can be a lot to ask. But staying safe is super important.

It's important for you kiddos to remember that most of you are in categories that can make you extra vulnerable. Being minors, being neurodivergent, being queer, having faced past trauma, being an age regressor...are all things that can make you especially vulnerable.

If you decide to share these things anyway, I hope I've encouraged you to try to do so sparingly. Maybe you can share some of these, but decide to make others private.

Stay safe kiddos!

[daryfromthefuture]

i'm on the train and bored and still have an hour to go, so TIME TO RANT ✨️

and i'm choosing to make a list of bttf scenes i would have done differently/things i would have added because i like disagreeing with bob gale as if i owned this franchise

this is maybe an unnecessary change, but personally, i would have preferred if there were more instances of marty trying to warn doc about his death in part 1. we see it when doc demonstrates the model and then later twice on november 12 (before he writes the letter and then before marty has to leave), but i feel like it would have been more emotionally impactful if he had tried it more than that and only at the very end given up and written that letter.

SHOW DOC PLAY SAX. LIKE BRO. they could have had a concert 😭 imagine doc crashing the dance and playing sax with marty on stage (take this bullet point with a grain of salt, i'm only half serious. but still seeing doc play sax would have been badass)

the most obvious point of all obvious points, add the goddamn lone pine mall hug. the entire fandom agrees it's canon, and i remember a post going around speculating that they did indeed record a hug and keep the secret footage somewhere at universal lmao. but all jokes aside, this hug was SO necessary. every sane person would be waiting for it when watching the movie. marty is literally on the ground, bawling his eyes out, thinking his friend is gone, and us heartbroken audience members don't even get a hug to soothe our souls. i haven't paid much mind to doc and marty's relationship when i first watched bttf, but even past me was expecting a hug. good thing bobby fixed it in the musical

MORE JENNIFER. don't knock that girl out for 75% of the movie, please. she deserved better, and i wish bttf 2 would have put more emphasis on her as a character and how she's like and stuff. i hate to see it, but she's such a surface character that we barely know anything about (in my opinion), and that's just sad. she could very well have gone to the cafe 80s with marty and kept him grounded and stuff.

honestly, i maybe even would have kept that deleted 1985a scene with dave. we don't get to see marty's siblings at all in that timeline aside from a mention from biff, and it would have been interesting to see.

this is quite a jump in time, but i wish bob gale would have expanded on the scene in bttf 3 in which doc tells marty that he wants to stay behind in 1885 because of clara. this might be my fanfic brain speaking, but i see so much conflict potential. it would have been wild to see doc and marty argue, maybe even fight for the first time in the trilogy, and picture the emotional turmoil both of them were going through. if i had been marty, i would have snapped, not gonna lie. like, yeah, i get that doc found the love of his life but after all the lectures he'd given marty and after all those times marty was willing to rip apart the fabric of time just to keep doc alive, that man just goes "sorry marty, i met a woman i fell in love with, thanks for saving my life so i can live it out HERE. you go back home and idk clean my lab" >:(. this will forever be a pet peeve hahahaha

WHY does doc just FLY OFF on that DAMN TRAIN? i have to admit, it is an epic ending and feels sort of celebratory, but how can he say that he had to get his dog BEFORE even MENTIONING marty, giving him a photo, shake his hand as if they were work colleagues and nothing more, and then LEAVE? WHAT??? at least talk to him for a bit longer, tell your best friend where you've been, whether he will see you again and that you cherish him for god's sake. if you already had to give him false hopes by getting on the train only to fly off on the hoverboard later 🙄