#I really wish it was smaller
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I keep getting ads for high-end tote bags because I've been on the hunt for a grown-up work bag to invest in, and they're all so disappointing because they'll be the right style and size and then I find out they're vegan leather
#please tell me why a vegan leather bag is almost $300#I don't want that shit#anyway I just bought a portland leather goods oversized tote and I really hope this is the one#I've bought and returned 6 bags now#potentially 7#it doesn't help that my work laptop is 15.6â#I really wish it was smaller
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silly and fun alternate outfits GO
#i love drawing dev with glasses so much#my personal hc is that his sunglasses are prescription <3#hazel and dev look so small next to winn </3#i really should have made their shoes smaller#fairly oddparents a new wish#fairly oddparents#fop#a new wish#hazel wells#winn harper#dev dimmadome#jasmine tran
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Regular reminder that sudden and severe weight loss is a pretty serious sign that something is very, very wrong
#weight#weight loss#brought to you by the realisation today that my hips are currently smaller than my fucking waist usually is#itâs summer and iâve been walking the hill a lil more but damn thatâs not fucking good#and before anyone even THINKS âi wish i had this problemâ i guarantee you do not#cuz it comes from 2 hour bathroom trips that are screamingly painful#and the arbitrary inability to eat literally anything#which often crops up right before i sit down to eat something#and i mean i can wait it out and eat late but itâs really goddamn annoying#and none of my goddamn clothes fit AGAIN iâm way out of even my smallest stuff#my broke ass is not buying new shit and if i make any cosplay to fit me now itâll be way too small when iâm back in remission đ¤#gotta get the goddamn meal replacement shakes again and see if i can process those#they are GROSS#gym bros are lying to you#they all suck#and i need to do em along with regular meals cuz iâm not gonna get enough from either#luckily i also have chronically low blood pressure so frenchfries are medicinal on both levels#this may also explain my resting heartrate being around 120bpm in my opinion#but no oneâs ever really discussed it
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I love arranging it's like YES YES THE OBJECTS ARE IN LOCATIONS
#i do sometimes wish i had a messy apartment and a put together life#anyway i acquired a new favorite object at goodwill yesterday a mug in my favorite color#i was wondering about the previous owner and why they would give up such a nicely shaped mug#was it an older person who passed away or just someone moving?#maybe they're just in a smaller apartment now and they have other mugs they like better#maybe their favorite color isn't sky blue#i wish i knew their whole story#why didn't you like this mug?#i do think about the people who owned my things before me and wish them well sometimes#it's nice to be connected like this#i think that's what i like so much about stories where people explore abandoned places#it's also about knowing other people in a very genuine way#not what they present to the world but how they really lived#idk
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Ive just progressively wanted to exist less and less and less in front of others for like years now and on my worst days it really gets to me
#kae.txt#i wish i was smaller in every sense of the word i dont want to be thought of#i cried to my mom and she had to leave the house and the way she said she'd be back sounded like she was really worried id do something and#i hate that i hate it so much i never wanna make her feel like that but i just cant help it im really tired#i hate even venting about it here cause god forbid i get a message about someone worrying about me#makes me feel fucking awful#sorry i started thinking again oops#ill be over it by tomorrow though thats always how this happens
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Since I'm thinking constantly about ASoIaF (the main story) for a while now I have to say it's really exausting to be an Arya stan.
The community is great, yes. There is a lot of good people
But the thing is
You enter tumblr
You search her tag
And instead of pretty gifsets
Well written metas
And pretty fanarts
What you see the most is people (we know who) mischaracterizing her, attacking her stans, twisting the narrative of the books about something important that involves Arya into something that doesn't even make sense only to downplay her importance, denying the part she plays on the key 5, not to mention how fixed these people are with her appearance.
I don't know how the stans and content creators are dealing with anon hate nowadays because I have been off for a really long time, (and I will continue to be, tbh), but I remember they were terrible, (anons actually saying Lyanna deserved to be raped to other anons wishing op to slit their wrists and kill themselves)
It's tiring.
And it has been the same for like... years now.
#i really wish Game of Thrones was never released on the first place and the fandom was composed just by a few people who have read the books#i really believe the community would be way better#smaller#but better#venting#asoiaf bs#juli rumbles#and yes#it has pretty metas and pretty gifsets and pretty fanarts but they are rare#and happens from times to times#while the ranting and discussion happens all the time
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hinds and hounds
#vanyel ashkevron#bard stefen#the last herald mage#heralds of valdemar#mercedes lackey#tried something different with this one and Iâm very đ about it#the wood grain gave me such a fucking headache and I still dknât really like how it turned out#also standard âthis is tracedâ disclaimer but this time itâs all my photos of my hands so Iâm not linking anything#I wish I was close with someone who had significantly larger/smaller hands than me because then I couldâve gotten even better photos#but alas Vanyel and Stefenâs hands are doomed to be the same size#mine
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kaiaĹ! this is the script for my new conlang din Égwa :D it's written top to bottom, left to right. everything is connected, so you could technically write an entire book in one long line if you had a really long strip of paper. theres a round and an angular version.
(<gw> is /gʡ/, <y> is /j/, <r> is /Éš/, <VV> is /VË/)
and here's a little text written in the script! at the points where one line ends and where another begins is a little dot to show continuity.
Translation under the cut! thanks for reading :)
What did this player dream? This player dreamed of sunlight and trees. Of fire and water. It dreamed it created. And it dreamed it destroyed. It dreamed it hunted, and was hunted. It dreamed of shelter. Does it know that we love it? That the universe is kind? Sometimes, through the noise of its thoughts, it hears the universe, yes.
wÉs obayarɨ raamsa sul? wÉs obayarɨ raamsa ug bɨgwɨniilwÉ yÉ Érewo. ug dɨrwÉ yÉ luuswÉ. din raamsa, ide din modena. yÉ din raamsa, ide din gwɨgna. din raamsa, ide din ebigna, yÉ ide din ebigsa. din raamsa ug ɨlsɨlaiwÉ. din Édiman ai, ide gom mÉnan din? ide wiisru naugwÉ? ins lÉbÉno, oden rugwu ug yawÉsɨwo ug dɨl, dim legwun wiisru, mai.
#i am so sorry for how tumblr displays images i wish there were a nice way to make it smaller and not so large and long#alas that is the curse of vertical scripts#text is an excerpt from the minecraft end poem btw!#also sorry the image quality isnt that great...... really couldnt wait to show it off i hope its ok :)#conlang#my conlangs#neography#translation#showcase#actually now that im looking at it im wondering if the symbol for s shouldnt be rounder. but i suppose its fine they can be allographs#yakaÉŹ
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I need to be weirder about the scavengers and cannibalism...
#its been a long day... but im feeling better now. (thanks for the well wishes and such btw <3-)#(-sending my well wishes in return by tenfold bcs. damn. it seems stuff is really going around rn)#but yeah... just. augh. theres just smth about how the scavs sorta translate into more like. thriller-esque genres pretty well?#like. i feel somehow those themes compliment their characteristics? or could compliment their characteristics in a more rounded out way#sure. theyre generally a light hearted romp of absurdity with occasional themes of a not good not bad handling of 'mental health matters'#but they just really shine a bit in horrific circumstances. esp with the sort of absurdity they bring to the table#theyre odd people. even in the context of their generally weird and alien universe. and that right there feels like a trove of potential#its like. ok. the lost light crew? also odd. but thats a huge ship. full of people and variety and a sense of purpose and normalcy post-war#(normalcy being. whatever all those background folks were getting up too while plot happened around them. cruise ship stuff ig)#but in contrast. with the w.a.p crew. its an ark class ship with like. a handful of people. and a whole lot of junk and free time#both just cruising through space endlessly for years. one with hundreds of people. and one with like 6 people.#so both are technically isolated when theyre not making pit-stops planet or station side. but again. 100s vs 6 dudes.#think. top of the line cruise ship from hell with a small town sized populace vs a big shitty boat and 6 starving guys#both have the capacity to become case studies in madness. both could do really well thriller wise. but the scavs being a smaller group?#it only being the 6 of them emphasis the isolation perhaps. less variety. less change. same 6 people for 5(?) years#things could get weird fast. codependent mentalities. us vs them mindsets. an otherness about everyone else outside of their group#and then! then you add to the mix the fact that theyre eating/drinking from corpses?! *chefs kiss* awesome. love it.#non-stationary isolation + cannibalism. ough. perfect mix. a classic of maritime horror but in space! :D!#a big ship. small crew. living while knowing that as soon as you kick the bucket. your body is the meal. your body is the fuel.#no decorum about it. no faith. no belief. just perverse survival. bcs they might enjoy it. a bloody gluttony. with a bite. a sample. a taste#it takes seeing your buddy as a walking talking burger to another level. bcs every corpse you come across is also a burger. and a gas can#also fulcrum making candy out of corpses is so. particularly perfect when it comes to the horrifically absurd. just. smth about it. idk#but also also. the line. where was the line drawn for each of them? and when did they each cross it?#most of them dont seem like the type to jump head first into that. so how did they justify it to themselves? had they done it before?#and then. when did it become normal? a habit? smth enjoyable?#i might be running out of tags. but yeah. them being weirder. esp about each other and others.#nothing brings a group of people together like the overhanging knowledge that you sort of kinda wanna eat each other#(rlly wishing i could stomach realistic thrillers rn. but i just cant. gotta stick to written or artistic styles or risk panic attacks :/)#(ive tried a couple movies and shows now. and cant get through most of them. praise be synopses and peoples long rambles about them tho :D)#(nothing like reading someones passionate ramble about the meaning/symbolism of some gory nightmare without having to actually see it lol)
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theres nothing i can really say about the miku expo screen situation that hasnt been said a bajillion times over by others (especially since i didnt realize they were going worldwide with this tour until shit went down orz) but it does make me think about the old niconico vocaloid concerts, which if i remember correctly do use screens, but they like. have fun with it: they use multiple screens (the comments scrolling on the side screens LOL), do all kinds of mashups and remixes and arranges and play with inside jokes and live actors and performers like the fucking cult or whatever at the beginning of the 2016 concert or like the MIME? 2015? THE MIME? im still hoping some day on this earth i can experience something as cool as that echo x hibikase performance....
youtube
miku and gumi fucking ironman-posing into the bottom screen kills me every time its SO good. let the girlies jump through screens!!!
#the expo.... it is so sad....shes stuck in that black box....free miku...free miku#im glad the energy in the audience still seems to be there tho! i hope people are having fun!#but it is a bummer. i always wished the official concerts did more with their screens when they used them#i think they really should have either gone hologram or they needed more than one screen. they dont have to go as hard as nnd cause thats#PROBABLY extremely expensive BUT even just like one or two smaller displays with the main one to have some real estate to mess with#the way the nnd party videos end up are SO fun like theyre jumping through different screens theres all kinds of#props and environments and effects everywhere. even tho theyre obviously using just the mmd models#so theyre not as beautifully rendered as official crypton concerts they make up for it by getting sillay#AND theyre can use other vocal synths like teto is here. teto is here
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thinking about cinderlion kits and how hollytufts reaction to flywhisker and snaptooth leaving to become kittypets was to aggressively call them traitors
#i speaku#rotating these six guys in my brain#i know i said i wish cinderlion had way smaller litters and i still feel the same way now but i can still think about them#w a dynamic of having drifted apart due to the shit theyve been going thru as well as the distance bet the two litters bc of age and stuff#nd spotfur feeling so ostracized from her fam bc of 'gestures at everything'#im ngl the first lotter really genuinely are kinda just there đ#litter*#i wonder if you couldbe just made them be one singular cat and it wouldve worked better#thats an interesting dynamic i think... a one kitten litter being excited over the prospect of having siblings when cinder n lion announce#the news and getting devastated when two of the second litter decide to leave#maybe they n spotfur couldve beeb close once but the hypothetical only child just xouldnt get rid of those feelings of betrayal and anger#that their sibs left just grew very distant bc of that#i like sibling dynamics have i mentioned that yet
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your joy will long outlive the gods
#xenoblade chronicles#YOU GOTTA LISTEN TO ME THEY MAKE YOU CLIMB UP A GIANT... ORGANISM#AND THE WHOLE TIME YOU HAVE THIS BIZARRE SENSE OF SCALE WHERE THERES A TITAN CONSTANTLY#VISIBLY LOOMING OVER YOU. ITS THE MOST INSANE SHIT EVER.#LITERALLY NEVER SEEN ANYTHING COMMUNICATE HOW INFINITESIMALLY SMALL YOU ARE. YOURE SMALLER THAN#THE BIONIS' BLOOD CELLS. ITS NUTS#my drawing#i genuinely wish i was better at art for the sole purpose of showing how Big this thing is#i want to climb around giant titan more. also i think mechonis is really cute ...... ehe
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Sorry for the lack of activity lately! Between being unwell lately and now experiencing a mini-heatwave, focusing on writing hasn't been easy. Got my stuff done for now though and I've got holiday upcoming so hopefully should be able to manage better soon! Also snek updates, Ror is doing so very well. He just had his first hopper mouse and is GLOWING with health, especially with some of that gorgeous sun. At least one of us is enjoying the heat!
He just finished drinking before I took this snap, you might see a teeny water droplet on the end of his chin <3
#đ || ooc#;; mun bullshit#tfw you want to write but it's a struggle#I do but life is feeling urghhh still#On the plus I am no longer such an anxious snek momma#Ror and the new baby are settling in well#Just fed both today their new food and they are loving how big and fresh it is!#New baby's food was just a touch too big before so I felt really bad how he struggled last week#Fortunately he's okay and had a small rat crawler just now#Bigger than a pup but smaller than a weaner if that makes sense? Baby's at an awkward size :(#Ror is so fucking pretty though and he's becoming so sociable too!#Always comes to the front of the viv when he sees me :D#All that lovely yellow is POPPING too#Wish the phone was better but it's def one of his best photos#Sorry for random word vomit people I am trying to focus on writing tonight#So warm today though it's like 26'c!!!
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cadence and shining armor, been doodling a lot of these guys the past few weeks :)
#this oneâs from a bit ago but i realized i never posted it#shining armorâs horn is bigger cause heâs from an alicorn version of him i drew and took out the wings and forgot to make his horn smaller#see. see. he doesnât necessarily become an alicorn because he did something really important BUT because cadence grew really stressed about#being immortal and wished for him to not die and then the next day he woke up as an alicorn#wasnât intentional on her part at all but :) it happened and then heâs the first prince#hehe#just a silly thought in my head#also cadence is trans :)#me seeing any pink and blue horse: trans beam#my art#my little pony#mlp#princess cadance#shining armor
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just learned that people are like legitimately pissed that mackenyu buffed up for season 2 ???
#opla#mackenyu#mackenyu maeda#one piece live action#arata mackenyu#one piece#opla zoro#like there are ppl making jokes whatever whatever and then there are ppl that are quite literally clutching their pearls#add this to the list of times that the anime/manga fans said rude/unnecessary things about the opla actors and their bodies#for anyone confused: some other examples include asking whether or not emily would get a breast enhancement to be âmanga/anime accurateâ#and asking whether ilia would lose weight because alvida gets skinnier later in the manga/anime#<- she did but because idk whether she made the decision herself (either a personal choice or for the show) or not i'll just leave it there#(that sentence lowkey made no sense but hopefully y'all get the gist)#but anyway#they're basically talking about how it's a continuity error and he's only supposed to get bigger after the time skip#BRO THESE ARE REAL PEOPLE'S BODIES !!!#like yes they're playing fictional characters but without the help of prosthetics they're just going in with their actual faces and bodies#the fact that you thought someone who filmed the first season in 2022 would look the exact same in 2024 (especially muscle-wise) is insane#there is next to no way he could've made his muscles look the exact same way#even if he did the exact same workouts and ate the exact same foods and just did everything the same#IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS !!!#and bodies (and the way muscle builds on them) already fluctuates over the course of days weeks and months#IMAGINE HOW MUCH IT CAN CHANGE IN TWO YEARS !!!!#like this is actually ridiculous#i have nothing against one piece fans as a whole#but the fact that there are so many creeps and overall weird people who have no grasp of reality in this fandom is so...I DON'T EVEN KNOW#like who is gonna be watching season 2 going âwow that was so good but i wish that zoro was smaller it really took me out of the showâ ?!#LITERALLY WHO?????#i will just be sitting in my little bubble dreaming about zoro crushing my skull with his arms while y'all lose your minds
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Sign
They didnât actually need to look to see who it was, nor did they need to move from their leaned position against the railing. âDo me a favor and fuck off for a minute.â
âNow, now, Hero. Thatâs no way to treat an honored guest.â
âFuck you. We both know that identity isnât yours.â The hero ran a hand over their tired face. âI donât care, whatever angle you have tonight, but if you kill someoneââ
âThat would be a spectacle. You should have already guessed that tonight is about espionage, considering the stolen identity and all.â The villain rested their hands on the railing next to the hero, but did not fully relax.
âFantastic.â The heroâs voice fell flat. âGo back inside, then.â
Despite themself, the villainâs eyes wandered over the heroâs slouched form.
Even in their current crumpled and defeated mannerism, the hero was a sight to behold.
Nothing but the finest of clothes these days, a hair and makeup team had undoubtedly fussed over the hero for hours to get the current superstar affect, and of course, those fine clothes highlighted those hard earned muscles, but funnily enough, the scars seemed to have been hidden.
âYou look miserable.â
The hero took a sharp breath in. âYou donât get to say that.â
âI told you what it would be if you signed, if you gave yourself to the government, say the word and Iâll fix it.â
The villain nearly jumped when the heroâs head swiveled towards them, expression close to feral.
âFix what?â They spat. âI never have to worry about another bill in my life, medicine, housing, food, they do it all, Villain.â The hero turned away. âAnd all I have to do is dress up sometimes? Pose for a picture so they can put my face on a lunchbox?â
âYouâre a product, Hero. They wave you around to show off their new attack dog.â
âI am notâ!â They slammed their fist on the railing. It cracked, startling the hero, who stumbled back a few steps.
The villain reached out a hand, only to retract it when the hero pulled away.
âWhatever. Itâs an equal exchange.â
The villainâs typically wide and watchful eyes softened. âWhy didnât you take my offer?â
Huffing, the hero turned, straightening out their form as they prepared to go back inside. âGo to hell.â
The villain reached out, gripping the heroâs arm, determined not to let them pull away this time.
âYou used to be happy! You used to take pride in doing good!â
âI also used to be hungry and on the verge of homelessness. Let go.â
âI would have helped you. Why didnât you let me help you?â
The hero ripped away their arm, turning and coming face to face with the villain, a mere inch apart.
âYou donât know what itâs like to owe someone.â The hero stepped forward, the villain stepped back. âAll of you rich assholes are the same. If you had helped me, me, your enemy, it would have meant something else entirely. I canât do that.â
Another step, another, and another.
âI never would have held it above you, Hero.â The villain had to keep walking backwards until they bumped into the railing. âIâm not like thatââ
âYou are! Youâre an awful person. Do you think that I believe youâd make an exception for me? And why? Just because you enjoy villainy? Because you find all this entertaining?â
The heroâs eyes watered. âFor them, I take pictures, I sign autographs, I wear the brand sponsored clothes and go to stupid galas, and yeah, sometimes Iâm just there to look scary, but you know what Iâm not doing? Giving myself away in a sense that I could never regain. What would it be for you?â
The villain opened their mouth, and closed it again.
What would it be for them? They didnât like to stop and think about these unspoken feelings, the feelings that drove them in an unfamiliar and warm way, feelings that made them go on espionage missions that werenât actually important.
What were they hoping to gain by helping the hero? Praise? Gratitude? Admiration?
Love?
As if reading the villainâs mind, the hero spoke.
âWhat would it be for you? Because for all the money in the world, you canât buy that.â The hero scoffed, backing away. âYou know, they really try to play up the strong but dumb image, makes it easier for sponsors to buy into, but Iâm not an idiot.â
âOf course youâre not.â
Suddenly, the heroâs eyes turned upwards, looking, looking, looking.
âDoesnât look like thereâs any cameras up here.â The heroâs shoulders dropped a little. âIf someone found out I damaged the railing, theyâd probablyâŚâ
The villain raised an eyebrow. âTheyâd probablyâŚ?â
âIt doesnât matter.â They held their chin high. âIâm going inside. Have your fun tonight, but any deaths and I will fly your sorry ass straight into the sun.â
âNaturally.â The villain smiled gently, although they were positive that if the hero could somehow survive in space, they would, in fact, fly the villainâs sorry ass into the sun.
But the hero didnât respond, didnât give any notice to the villainâs existence as they slipped through the door, a full photo-op ready picture of grace.
The villain let out a shuttering breath once the door closed again, heart hammering in their chest.
No, no, no time for that. The villain couldnât let this new feeling distract them, there were things to be done, olive branches to be offered, and signatures to be burned.
#villain#hero x villain#hero#heroine#snippet#villain x hero#heroes and villains#villainess#writing#heroes#hereâs my impression of the mosquito that kept me awake because it wouldnât leave me alone but consequently I wrote this#ok hereâs what it sounded like#eeeeeeEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee#now imagine that really high pitched but smaller#anyways#thereâs an aching thereâs an aching some ancient#I do not feel female rage in the way that should be there#because itâs over now get over it move on move on move on#and I have like they advised#but I wish the women of my family could pass down more than quiet survival because I want to be angry#I want to burn and rage and revenge and avenge everything and everyone#generationally it is not my time#I will leave it to my daughters daughter#and maybe that is what my mother and grandmothers hope for
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