#I really wasnt going to do anything but then i saw him acting different so i was like (: lets see what happens if i say this!

[mrfoox]

Team: accidentally flirts with people and give them the wrong idea/get myself into spicy situations I wasn't prepared for

[i-2hoon]

https://www.tumblr.com/i-2hoon/751730271029723136/can-u-write-hcs-for-subenha-and-their-first-time?source=share

HII I'M THE ONE WHO REQUESTED THIS!!! AND IT'S SO GOOD, UR REALLY FREAKING GOOD! jw's section had me melting ngl, it's so precious :( i would love to see a small drabble of it written (+ hoon's if u could!)

and pls take ur time on requests, i bet there's a lot coming ur way! just know ur doing so well! welcoming u w all the love ☹️☝️🎀🎀

hi hi anon, thank you so much for the recommendation!

jungle bike 𐔌ㅤ p.sh

pairings ᱖ sub!bottom!sunghoon x dom!top!male!reader

warnings ᱖ explicit content, loss of virginity, endless teasing, established relationships, degradation. for a first time, this is far from sweet.

notes ᱖ hi hi anon hello! thank you so much for this ask and others! unfortunately, i know you requested jungwon, however i do not feel experienced enough in writing him to write a full drabble/story yet, i really do apologize! but i certainly will in the future

"would you just shut the fuck up?"

an annoyed threat slipped from your gritted teeth as you shot your boyfriend a nearly deadly glare, but you didnt get the reaction you wanted as always. instead, the other man seemed to only eye you up and down with a teasing expression. you saw that expression quite often: it was one that you wished you could just slap right off him. however, the situation in which you were watching him was much different than the usual.

ah, right, he was under you, and—pardon the vulgar language—with your fingers knuckle deep in his ass nonetheless. yet he still had the nerve to act like this; a cocky smirk spread across his face and a sultry look within his half lidded gaze. for someone so confident and so sure of himself like this, he certainly looked like a total

"slut," you muttered to yourself, your gaze flickering to where two of your fingers disappeared into him to prep him. he raised his eyebrow at the insult.. but something about it caused his stomach to churn in a sweet way. "how romantic, calling your boyfriend a slut the first time you fuck him," he mocked you, a soft hiss escaping his lips being the thing that cut him off as you managed to add a third finger.

"its because youre looking and acting like one," you narrowed your eyes at him once again while trying to gauge his reactions; curling your fingers to hit one spongey spot and ultimately causing him to curse and arch his back off the bed. "haah— fuck—" he cursed, his nails digging into the nape of your neck to ground himself, "you cant say anything, youre the one fingering me right now," he was quick to shoot back.

"and youre the one taking it, so shut the fuck up," repeating your statement from earlier, you deemed him prepped enough to pull your fingers out. despite there not being much of a size or strength difference you still managed to pry his arm from your neck and manhandle him to lay on his stomach. you could hear him whine at the loss of something filling him: he really was a whore, wasnt he? well, a virgin whore, at least. it was pretty easy to clock that he hadnt done this before, judging by the way he would writhe and curse with just a single touch. not that you were complaining at all. in fact, the way that you were the one going to break him and his innocence down little by little seemed to subconsciously turn you on, but you werent focused on that at the moment.

you pulled him up by his hips, causing him to try to protest but his complaints fell onto deaf ears. for a moment you had to freeze, admiring this sight of your boyfriend face down and ass up for you. fuck, you thought as you reached over to the nightstand to grab your phone. you couldnt help but snap a picture from your point of view, watching how his ears turned red at the sound of the camera.

"what the fuck?"

"for later," you mumbled, tossing the phone to the side haphazardly. moving to lean forward and press your chest to his back, you nipped at his ear and perched your hands on his waist, "you look so fucking pretty like this, and like a total whore," you whispered. the way he flushed wouldve made people think you were telling him sweet nothings rather than degrading him, and that was adorable in itself.

despite the heated nature of the situation, you still knew you needed to ask for permission, "you ready? you know you can tap out at any time," it wad subtle reassurance but it was enough to cause sunghoon to relax, if you could judge by the way he untensed in your hold. "mhm.. im sure, and im ready— just fuck me already," he complained, digging his nails into the white sheets below him. his cheek was already pressed into it and his eyes were closed tightly: he seemed nervous.

and you knew the best way to keep those thoughts out of his head.

"as you wish."

[dyrus]

today i woke up and saw tfblade post how he got banned three times and thought that was kinda crazy but funny.

but being one minute out of bed i skimmed it then saw a reply saying he needed to get off the net and that league is a childrens game.

this immediately provoked me because the thought of someone controlling someone else to be online and calling league a childrens game when i made a ton of money off it made me really angry.

so i replied with the "who the fuck do you think you are lmao" and was laughing on my way to the shower.

i played sf6 streamed played baulders with the boys, then checked back on it and saw a bunch of people saying i fell off, i wasnt human, one parasocial weirdo brought up my ex, and one guy being genuninely confused.

i felt anger and sadness for a good hour and then went back to reasess why this happened and realized the context was he didnt just fuck himself over but it was a korean bootcamp so a bunch of ppl that came over got banned not just him.

not to mention korea stans, vtubers fans, league fans all involved. so realizing that i stepped on a landmine i wasnt mad anymore and actually understood why the feedback was so awful and deleted some dumb shit i said and said sorry to the one guy who was confused on why i would ever say such a thing.

i was in a really bad mood at the end of my day but thanks to my friends who let me vent for a little i came to realize that i actually fucked up by not reading more. and even posting in drama filled with these kinds of fans. i'm impressed that anyone even liked my post because now i feel sick looking at the situation so i deleted it.

i still dont think it's right for others to tell people what to do and calling league a childrens game but i clearly missed the point and took a L today.

everything is good with me but i have no motivation to do anything besides play games and keep myself from being to unhealthy (i'm back at 230) but i plan on losing weight again before any event i go to (evo or twcon) next year and hopefully can post some very happy pictures once again like last year.

that was my day, i posted this because i feel like this is my safe space and i felt a little lonely for the first time in months.

i really dont think i would of done anything to much different in my life but so much pain is caused from misunderstandings and miscommunication and sometimes when i want attention and act like a fool once in awhile.

but i have a lot of gamer friends i enjoy playing games with so im good.

holy fuck i hate being bi now it's like double the horny and i dont need any of that.

thanks for coming to my ted talk

[ichinoue]

People who dislike the rukihime friendship aren't always rukia stans, I'm an orihime stan, but found the friendship forced due to orihimes lack of reciprocation. Rukia cared for orihime, and considered her a friend, but orihime didn't feel as much the same, as in she appreciatd rukia, but didnt consider her as her girl bff like rukia did, that position goes to tatsuki.

For example, in the soul society arc, we see that orihime followed ichigo there so that she could help and protect him, so in other words, rukia wasnt her number one priority, although she's the one ichigo was suffering and going through pain to save. Her priority was ichigo, and being able to help him, not saving rukia.

Meanwhile I'm hueco mundo, we see rukias dialogue about how she desperately wanted to save orihime. We see her crawling and bleeding on the floor aftwe fighting as she thinks about how she wants to save orihime, and how she knows the feelings of being captive and helpless. She says "orihime, I'm coming!" Showing how determined she is to save her, and she literally almost died in her battle.

With orihime, there was nothing like that in soul society, because as I said, helping ichigo was her main priority. Now I'm not trying to day orihime doesn't care about rukia, just not as much as rukia cared about her. It was one sided because orihime never showed the amount of care and affection for rukia as rukia did for her.

Even rukia stans who dislike the friendship only dislike it because again, its one sided. Its not a well developed friendship, and they barely even interacted anyway, I saw some talking about it on twitter, and I didn't see anything about them disliking they personally didn't like orihime, they all just said rukia deserved better.

I don't hate the rukihime friendship, I just think it's forced and underdeveloped. Friendships lle tatsuhime and ichiruki are way better written to be fair.

I mean idk, I feel like you can have more than one bff?? Like Orihime being so close to Tatsuki doesn't lessen her friendship with Rukia. It's not like it's a competition for the number one spot lol.

I see what you mean about Orihime going to SS mainly to help Ichigo save Rukia, but I think it's important to remember the context of the two rescue missions: The Rukia rescue mission in SS happened before Rukia and Orihime were shown becoming closer friends. When they're training together in the arrancar arc and Ukitake is observing them and comments on their friendship--that didn't happen until after the Rukia rescue. And shortly after that, with their friendship now clearly established, is when the Orihime rescue mission happens in HM. So I don't think it's really fair to compare how each girl acted during the two different rescue missions because again, the Rukia rescue happened before they became closer, the Orihime rescue happened after. It's like expecting Orihime to care just as much for Rukia in the SS arc as Rukia cared for Orihime in the HM arc, but the SS arc happened first, before their friendship developed over time.

And then in HM when Rukia was bleeding on the floor thinking about Orihime, she could relate to Orihime being captive because something similar had already happened to her before, it happened to her first. Whereas Orihime didn't have that kind of experience to relate to or think about back in the Rukia rescue mission, because her abduction hadn't even happened yet at the time. So again, it doesn't seem fair to compare the two situations based on the context. But even still, even as Rukia was laying on the floor near death, Orihime was literally crying and banging on the door of the room she was being held captive in trying to get out and get to Rukia when she felt her spiritual pressure disappear.

One thing I will say about the RukiHime friendship, if it seems unbalanced or that Rukia cares more than Orihime does--I think a lot of it has to do with the age gap. Rukia isn't some friend from school Orihime can relate to in many ways. Instead, I see her as an older, big sister type friend to Orihime. They're not the same age or the same maturity level, they don't have the same life experience. But they still care about each other, and to me, Rukia looks out for Orihime the way a big sister does, so if it seems like she's doing more...that's typically the role big sisters fill. I don't think one has to treat each other exactly the same as the other does, because of the uniqueness of their friendship.

But, I understand that it's not going to be everyone's cup of tea.

[somedeadbeatloz3r69]

Since I've been seeing so many people shit on joker 2; folie a deux, so will I. (i saw it a daily earlier before most because it came out a day earlier in my area lol THE JOKER 1 IS VERY GOOD, POTRAYS PYSCHOTIC BEHAVIOR PERFECTLY AND IS BEAUTIFUL. BUT, JOKER 2 IS NOT ON THE OTHER HAND. YES, IT IS BEAUTIFUL, BUT HOLY FUCK ALL THAT SINGING WAS UNNEEDED, AND ALSO IT MADE BARELY ANY SENSE, ALSO JOKER IS MEANT TO BE THE ONE MANIPULATING HARLEY, NOT CODEPENDENT ON HER?? AND SHES NOT EVEN PYSCHO, JUST GOOFY AND WEIRD. JOKER 2 IS VERY HARSH AND REAL, AND VERY ACCURATELY CONNECTED TO THE ILLNESSES FEAUTURED IN JOKER 1, BUT WHAT THE PROBLEM IS WHO THEY'RE POTRAYED BY. THE ILLNESSES ARE ACCURATE, THEY GO TOGETHER, BUT THEY DON'T MATCH THE CHARACTER OF JOKER. THEY DON'T MATCH HIS ACTIONS, THE ILLNESSES OF JOKER IN PART 1 MATCHED HIS CHARACTER AND MADE SENSE; PERCIEVING HIM TO PEOPLE AS A CHARACTER THAT FINALLY BROKE FREE, SOMEONE WHO ENJOYED THE HIGH OF BEING KNOWN, AT A HIGHER RANK THAN EVERYONE ELSE. HE FELT AS IF HE WAS ONTOP, AND HE LOVED THE ATTENTION. HE WAS CARELESS AND RELENTLESS, YET DELUSIONAL AND PYSCHOTIC. THIS ALL HAPPENED WHEN HE FINALLY BROKE; FINALLY GOT SET FREE, AND HE WENT CRAZY AND YET WAS STILL DELUSIONAL. BUT, IN JOKER 2, HE IS MUCH MORE CO-DEPENDENT AND WEAK SHOWN, NOT MATCHING HIS CHARACTER IN THE 1ST ONE. YES, HE'S BEEN IN THE ASYLUM FOR AWHILE, BUT THAT SHOULD JUST MAKE HIM MORE CARELESS AND INSANE. BUT NO, NOW HE'S MORE SOFT AND DELUSIONAL, THE DELUSIONAL PART MAKES SENSE, BUT THE PART WHERE HE JUST GOES BACK TO NORMAL AND SAYS 'THERE WAS NEVER A JOKER'? NO. HE'S BEEN BRAINWASHED AND IT DOESNT MATCH HIS CHARACTER. HE CLEARLY FELT HAPPIER THAN EVER WHEN HE WAS THE JOKER AND IT DIDN'T MATCH HIS CHARACTER, THERE'S NO GOING BACK. YOU CAN'T JUST GO BACK TO BEING ARTHUR FLECK, THE YOU THAT YOU DESPISE. THE YOU THAT WAS WEAK. AFTER A TRAUMATIZING EXPERIENCE, IF ANYTHING, YOU SHOULD BECOME MORE EVIL. MORE REVENGEFUL. NO, IT'S NOT INVALID IF THAT'S NOT HOW YOU REACT, BUT IT'S INVALID FOR THE JOKER BECAUSE IT WAS INACCURATE TOWARDS HIS CHARACTER IN JOKER 1.

THEY BOTH POTRAYED MENTAL ILLNESS VERY WELL, AND THEY DO GO TOGETHER, BUT NOT FOR THE JOKER. THE JOKER IS EVIL AND RELENTLESS. NOT SOFT AND VULNERABLE. HE KNOWS WHAT HE DID. AND HE'S PROUD OF IT. HE FINALLY FELT ALIVE, SEEN, AND THE MOVIE OVERALL WAS MUCH MORE REALISTIC AND STRAIGHTFORWARD. HE MEANT TO DO WHAT HE DID PURPOSEFULLY. IT WASN'T JUST AN 'ACT'. ARTHUR FLECK WAS THE ACT, WAS HIM GOING INSANE, ARTHUR FLECK WAS THE BUILDUP TO THE JOKER. THE JOKER WAS THE REAL HIM, THE HIM THAT COULD FINALLY GET RELEASED. THE HIM HE'S BEEN CONCEALING FOR FOREVER. SO HIM BEING HAPPY AND CARELESS, AND EVEN ENJOYING BEING EVIL, DOES NOT MATCH HIM BEING SOFT AND VULNERABLE. YES THE DELUSIONS MAKE SENSE, DEEPLY, BUT THEY'RE JUST TOO CORNY AND TOO CO-DEPENDENT. BEING DELUSIONAL MAKES SENSE FOR HIM, BUT HIM HAVING CO-DEPENDENT DELUSIONS, SAYING ITS 'ALL A FANTASY', IS THE HARSH TRUTH, YET ALSO INACCURATE. HE WAS DELUSIONAL, IT WAS JUST A FANTASY, BUT HE LOVED IT, IT WAS PART OF HIS CHARACTER, HE WOULDNT JUST ADMIT HES A TERRIBLE PERSON, AND HOW IT WAS ALL AN ACT, BECAUSE IT NEVER WAS, BECAUSE DEEP DOWN HES ALWAYS BEEN THIS PYSCHOPATH. TO SAY IT WAS JUST AN ACT?? IS INSANE. IN HIS DELUSIONS ABOUT HAVING A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP, IN JOKER 1, THEY WERE NEVER TOO CORNY. NEVER TOO CODEPENDENT, FOR EVEN IN THE DELUSIONS HE COULD RELY ON HIMSELF, FOR EVEN IN THE DELUSIONS HE WAS CONFIDENT. BUT IN THE JOKER 2, HIS DELUSIONS ARE CORNY, AND VERY MUSICAL-LIKE WHICH WASNT NEEDED, VERY RANDOM AND KINDA DIDNT ADD UP. THE MOVIE WAS GREAT WITH GREAT SCENERY, BUT HOLY SHIT THEY TRIED WAY TOO HARD AND WENT OFF TRACK. IT WOULD BE A GREAT MOVIE, BUT MAYBE RELATED TO A DIFFERENT JOKER. BECAUSE THE JOKER IN JOKER 2, IS NOT THE JOKER WE SEE IN JOKER 1. ITS LIKE AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT JOKER. OVERALL, IT WAS AN OK MOVIE. BUT IT WOULDVE BEEN BETTER IF NOT RELATED TO THE JOKER. WHAT WAS REALLY FASCINATING ABOUT JOKER 1 IS HOW IT SHOWED HOW PEOPLE BREAK, IT WAS A MOVIE ABOUT CHAOS AND HOW HE WAS SLOWLY LOSING HIS SANITY. SOME PEOPLE COULD EVEN RELATE TO HIS SHITTY LIFE, PEOPLE FELT COMFORT. PEOPLE FELT SYMPATHY; EMPATHY. BUT IN THE JOKER 2 THEY COMPLETELY TAKE THAT AWAY, RIDDING OF HIS TOUGH, CARELESS, 'I'D DO IT AGAIN.' PERSONA AND REPLACING IT WITH A SOFTER, 'I REGRET IT ALL', PERSONA. JOKER 2 OVERALL DIDN'T MATCH HIS CHARACTER, AND PRACTICALLY WAS CHARACTER REGRGESSION RATHER THAN CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. PEOPLE WANTED THE JOKER TO GO INSANE, THEY WERE HAPPY HE WAS TAKING REVENGE ON THE CRUEL WORLD. BUT IN JOKER 2, HE WAS EXACTLY LIKE HE WAS IN THE START OF JOKER 1. WEAK, SAD. YES, IT WAS A GOOD MOVIE WITH VERY WELL POTRAYED MENTAL ILLNESSES, IT JUST DIDN'T FIT HIS CHARACTER.

[spikeinthepunch]

the other thing i really wanted to mention about CotC in more detail, esp after watching new episodes, was the times the series tackles abusive family in a way thats heavily implied or straight up shown.

most obvious example of this was the episode "Scoutguest", where Craig allows Jason to come home after he says he lost his keys. What is actually most interesting about this episode is it focuses on how Craig is completely oblivious, and how Jason's home life shows his submissiveness in home environments. The first example was Craig and Bernard fighting about chores, and Jason just goes and does the chores for him, stating he wanted to save them the argument. I'm sure many who can immediately find this familiar- the act of doing something good in order to stop your parents from yelling at you or others in the house. You just want it to stop. But Craig not knowing any better, uses this behavior to his benefit. going through the episode, Craig's mom eventually calls the number shes given (which, we dont actually know was Jason's mom, and i think it probably wasnt- probably another source that knows jason's situation) and learns/understands whats up, and is kind to him as a guest. She doesnt tell Craig anything- he's a child, itd be hard to explain, and it may be invasive to Jason to explain it to Craig. regardless, she encourages Craig to be kind and when Craig hears Jason say somethings on his own he comes to realizing how different things are- and pieces together things. There is a lesson in realizing you should watch how you treat others, not presume about other's lives, and that some times someone seeking help may be doing so in a very discreet/not obvious way.

but (spoilers for newest episodes) i actually found this topic interesting to look at with Xavier. Xavier is a bully, hes mean. We learned that Xavier never had friends because he realized they just liked how he has cool stuff, and because of that, he just bullied people back, and felt that being King got him attention enough to feel good. hes a child, and Craig intervening right now is what he needs- Xavier can change. So onto my thought- The episode where Xavier explaining his story made me uncomfortable. We havent seen much of his family life. Things we do know: his oldest brother Kennith is at college, his oldest sister Cheyenne is in highschool, an unnamed/presumed mother. Unclear about another parent.

I shouldn't assume what i don't know about Xavier (his parent situation, mainly) but its interesting that we see so little of his family outside of his siblings, because the show has been very good at showing us entire family dynamics (we saw parents for characters that hardly show up!). His family is rich, his brother is distant as he is in college, and so Xavier is basically around his sister all the time. Previously I think I just took as her as the moody highschooler who thinks her little bro is annoying. But, in episode 2 of season 5, we get his story (which again, notably, does not show anything of his parents) where he eventually shows how he wanted to get stronger to i guess, beat up Craig. This is where i got uncomfy with the implications- his sister. Cheyenne works out, and the little we saw of her as the former queen did show she was also likely a bully, and i think it may be safe to say she is toxic and abusive towards Xavier as well tbh. Like, the way she start getting physical with him in that episode... getting angry, belittling him, hitting him. It made me anxious to see, feeling what is implied about her character. she does seem 'proud' of him improving but, i think its a situation of control (as she encourages in him too) and passed off like "tough love" when its actually really bad.

Xavier is 12 years old, we cannot and should not hate him like he is unredeemable. He turned into what he is for reasons a child likely would- be it the lack of people wanting to be his friend, or the implication that his older sibling pushed him around and bullied him herself. i did not really expect to see that in these new episodes honestly- it would have been easy to just say its how Xavier didnt make friends, but i think looking harder, you can again see how abuse affects kids, in ways that are very different but both bad.

[httpiastri]

abt the red flag topic I remember when I remembered pauls existence bc of ollie and checked his ig (little did i knew what that would turn out) and I saw the amount of women he follows (including Victoria Secret's account) and IMMEDIATELY thought jesus christ thank god im not obsessed w this one LMAOOOO look at me now !!!

I really think he's a player who KNOWS how to talk with women bla bla bla and doesn't actually want to get into a relationship rn, hes just having his fun around bla bla bla but I also like to think abt him unexpectedly doing something w the intention of being just a hook up and noticing that theres something wrong, hes feeling different etc etc etc or like meeting someone that is actually a worst player than him

thats the main reason why I love to imagine popstar!reader w him unexpectedly being hit by cupid's arrow, really thinking he could hook up with miss america's sweetheart and leave without any emotional damage 👀👀 and also like for the first time in his life not knowing how to act bc ok he wants it again but hes not dealing with a random person

plsss 😭😭 it's always the ones you think you wont fall for, huh? at first i was very "no im not gonna like paul, he's dino's teammate and the day i get forced to pick sides it will be too hard" but then….. 🫠

100% agreed tho, i hope he's just out there living his best life (or in a steady 5-year relationship if that's what he wants, i dont mind either one). but omfg you're SO right !!! pls that adds such a cute new angle to it, like them spending one night together and afterwards paul is like… woah…. he's used to just forgetting about the girl, not waking up next to her and feeling lowkey giddy 😳

and he's also used to just being used for sex yk, like it's not that she's the biggest celeb that he's ever met so he knows what it's like to just be left by a girl who then doesn't want anything to do with him again. but y/n wasnt like that…. it's the way that she managed to get his phone number from someone in merc, the way that she texts him every once in a while about his races, and the way that paul finds himself wishing she's going to be at the next weekend….

he's just really not expecting to feel like this; he's barely (or not even) 20, he's always been telling himself to steer clear of relationships and anything other than hookups because it will mess with his head and he'll be distracted from his racing. but now that his mind is on her like 24/7, he finds himself actually enjoying it…

[guckies]

about people being upset about how Bad gives a ton of stuff and never gives anything in return, it’s definitely something you’d only really pick up on and be upset about if you watched his pov a lot. Yeah people are being kind of dramatic about it, but a lot of people in the server (in rp of course) seem to only seem to think of him as the guy who gives them things or the guy that was awful in purgatory (when in reality he genuinely wasnt much worse than a lot of other players)

I think it’s similar to how foolish fans constantly talk about how people (again only in rp) call him a bad father, when in reality it really doesn’t happen that often, and as far as I know it’s always just been jokes. Like of course fans are gonna be dramatic about the things their fav streamer goes through, even if those things aren’t super evident to someone who doesn’t watch them often.

it’s really just a difference in perspective, but if people talking about how they’re happy Bad isn’t giving things away for free as much anymore is bothering you that much, you can always block them

I genuinely don’t mean to come across as aggressive or hating on you or anything, I just saw your post about it earlier and wanted to talk about my perspective 👍

It wasn’t that they were upset, rather they were using it as justification for Bad to have a villain arc (which imo is lazy and there are way better reasons or ways for Bad to have a villain arc).

As well this “struggle” is not exclusive to Bad. Like during the cookie quests arc, Morning crew were the ones that put most of the extra items or mobs there for everyone. Especially Phil who had a lot of ingredients and stuff they needed that he did gave even on days he didn't stream. But there are so many instances in which people give for free and don't recieve acknowledgement.

I totally get being happy that Bad isn’t giving everything away for free, been the same with the ccs I watch too. But calling Bad the only good guy for doing that and saying he needs a villain arc over something so stupid that no one asked him to is questionable. Especially when it was/is not exclusive to him and their are so many cooler ways for him to have that villain arc.

But also I'm not saying y'all shouldn't be happy about Bad not giving stuff because I also am happy he's not giving stuff away for free(personally love watching the struggle people go through looking for things). Rather just not give him this massive praise for it when it is universal experience they all face. Cause my increased annoyance is with some fans more specifically ghosties who act as if their cc is the only one that experiences these "problems" or just don't watch anyother pov so instead amplify the "problems" that don't exist or affect everyone.

And I get what you’re trying to say with fans being dramatic because some of them really are. However, it’s definitely not similar to Foolish getting called a bad father at all. Since doozers had to make a whole thread that we still refer to now to infrom people that have never watched Foolish & Leo clips ever and just hate Foolish and believe that Foolish is a bad parent over the jokes Bad or Fit have made. (Which we are so sick of because how is it 9 months in and we’re still discussing Foolish’s parenting which has been nothing but good)

Also not going to talk about purgatory because to me he was a bad guy and should have faced lore consequences for some of the stuff he did but that is neither here nor there so ✋🫥🤚

But yeah I already do block people for things I just don't agree with but also I like talking about things that include criticism so if people don't agree with me then I encourage them to block me too. Also thanks for being nice about it, cause this isn't really the biggest deal for me but I do like the discussion of these things sometimes :]

[minimujina]

so. hear me out. scaramouche and nilou

maaaajor spoilers below, dont read if you dont know about scaramouche’s full lore and character arc and everything!!

i had this idea because you know how when he becomes wanderer (after losing his memories) and starts to work for that guy in the grand bazaar for free?? he HAD to have seen nilou perform before, i mean he must have right. and since he’s a completely different person from the big emo bastard scaramouche, i imagine that he would be so enchanted by her dancing that he might approach her after a show to tell her. he’s really sweet and just sort of floaty, ykyk how he was before he got his memories back. just a little guy :)

they would hit it off and stuff and maybe they’d go for a walk or something around the city or in a garden :) it would mostly be wanderer listening to nilou talk, since he cant remember anything about himself, and hes much more interested in her anyways. he finds himself really smitten anshjddhhd

i think that would probably be like their only interaction before he gets his memories back, but it was enough to spark a connection on both ends (especially since he told nilou jack shit about himself—she’s left wondering who the hell the guy with the big hat was lmao)

however, since he has now returned to being a bastard full-time, he tries to distance himself from nilou to protect her. he knows that if he saw her again and she realized he was a completely different person, he wouldn’t know what to do. there was too much to explain. he would feel so guilty not having an explanation if he accidentally said something rude or acted out of line. and in the end, he might just end up driving her away from him—which would be yet another loss of a person who is in some way special to him. and he’s not sure he’ll be able to endure that kind of pain all over again. what if she only liked the other version of him, and not this version, who was jaded and cynical and hurt?

auntie buer is not having any of that though lol—she quickly finds out he sort of might maybe like nilou (it wasnt that hard, he was literally thinking about her constantly. the thoughts of how to avoid her kept getting interrupted with fluttering admirations about her, how lovely she is, how sweet, how yadda yadda, and then he would get mad at himself and shake his head). and so nahida does some meddling (idk details theyre tbd) and BOOM confrontation ez clap

i could say more but. it runs off into a specific scene with details that arent necessary for this drabble post.

i thought of this last night and slapped some words onto a google doc before the inspiration slipped (it is quite literally an entire page of a block of nonstop words, there are no breaks whatsoever and its a mess😭) and i wanted to post a modified and much less aggressive key-smashing version of it to see if i can convert anyone to my rarepair agenda :-)

i might. might may maybe might write this story but i already have so many ideas i Cannot commit to and so many other things i should be focusing on. at the very least it will probably be a long time before i post it if i do end up writing it fyi—but this will definitely be in the back of my head

(so like. does. does anyone see what i see. does anyone else think this is cute. because im losing my mind thinking about these two in This specific scenario) (please let me know if this is cute or if i am delusional)

[anzuhan]

hii!! i just wanted to give a bit of my opinion on tatsumi from someone who doesnt like him nearly as much as other characters so a more casual perspective i guess ^^ his design is very nice and pretty he gets a lot of nice cards which was my first introduction to him. initially i wasnt very interested since at the start his character was mostly just about religion and i'm not a big fan of christianity but he's more than that now!! he can be really funny sometimes, like his love for driving paired with crazy driving skills, and he has a lot of depth with his past and current issues and relationships to those around him. he's deeply flawed but doesn't seem to fully realize it, believing to be doing good even at the cost of himself. he's really similar to eichi since theyre parallels!! from what i've seen from others with more knowledge on the subject he's well handled disabled rep as well, his injury is taken seriously and consistently deeply relevant to him physically and emotionally which is really nice to see in media!! his actions in obbligato make sense to dislike but i think that's the intention, again similar to eichi during the war and a lot of eccentrics fans disliking him there but both of them believed their bad actions would have a good outcome and were willing to do anything to help others even if a bit misguided. i think their similarities are really interesting especially with the different ways they turned out as people after those actions!! i'm also more interested in his relationship with religion after obbligato where they went a little more into the specific kind of christianity he learned from his family thats actually a religious minority in japan, and the way its hard to tell how much he truly believes in what he says or just believes he Should because of how he was raised, its a much more complicated relationship with religion than say a character whos just a devout christian in america! esp since he's not actually the kind of pushy religious stereotype people think he is from first glance, he brings up god a decent amount but isnt really trying to recruit anyone or force them into his beliefs, its just something he brings up for himself usually, similar to other characters with religious beliefs like keitos buddhism he's not one of my favs, probably not even in my top 30 characters but as someone whos also sort of an everyonep and does love every character even if not equally, i think hes neat! he acts like a mature adult but really he's barely out of high school and went through so much in his life to not really get to be a kid, his entire teenage years were fucked up so he's still recovering from that damage and having to unlearn a lot of mentalities that hurt himself and others, he's got a long way to go but i like seeing that journey and development in characters personally!! i'm sure tatsumip can put it better and have more detailed knowledge of him, i just thought it might also help to hear from a fellow everyonep who isnt the biggest fan of tatsumi but likes him an okay amount ^^

adding the other two asks below as well v

first of all thanks to all 3 of you for taking the time to write these out and send them 🙏 theyre all very long and contain a lot of info. anzu will try to go over all of them in the answer now 👍

- for the part of the design, dude no kidding. when anzu first got into enstars anzu did actually like him too for like. 2 days 😭 and it was also because of the design cause you know ... first thing you see when you come here are all sorts of cool designs ! anzu joined enst community around the time global released, so it was past initial obbligato release in jp ; when anzu saw his obbligato card as well w the longer hair (w no context🐟) anzu was sooo whipped. his design is nice but to add onto this anzu does really think all enstars designs are very well done, for all characters ! we already have the design notes in the artbooks and how much attention there is to the littlest of details on all of them, so no wonder. of course, kazehaya is no exception to this as well, the hair and eye shades go well together, his droopy eyes fit in with making him look kind, his 5* outfit designs are also all very fitting 👍 nothing much bad to say about this part really. anzu also didnt draw him too much but he was fun to draw and his colors are nice to work with as well (adding more onto this from the fact that anzu drew christo from disgaea 5 a lot that has extremely similar color palette and looks to him 😭)

- at the similarities with tenshi. okay this mightve been old news to the fandom but this is new to anzu, but it may be just because anzu always related tenshi and ibara more as parallels ? for their pasts though it does make sense ! anzu may have just focused too much on the present on drawing those parallels though. also funny both tenshi and kazehaya are in the tea club (this is a cry for help also. anzu misses ! era tea party club so much)

- for the part in obbligato. clearly anzu forgot to mention anzu's real problem with this 💥 anzu doesnt really care that much about his cult leading era because sure it is a cool topic to look back on, even moreso anzu loves the whole deal with kanata's ex god activities and thinking up a what if he was still in that position now <- from both a horror aspect and not ; so with kazehaya it wouldnt be much different, just that as one of you have said he just didnt realize the damage he was causing despite having the best of intentions. anzu's real problem with that deal is how kaname's ended up the way he did from all this, in a way of 'oh if stupid kazehaya werent there, he'd be fine now' or along those lines. anzu is simply being a little hater from this.. much like himeru ✊️ kaname simply just means. a lot to anzu so mayhaps it just highly weights in on the hate 😔

- for the religious stuff. yeah this is also the only other part that actually bothered anzu, but guess it is not as common in the latter stories ? anzu did not go out of anzus way to read a ton of kazehaya stories to know, its true, but for the main story & initial idol stories (i.e aira idol story 2) kazehaya uses terms like 'lost lamb' and its a bit. eeeeeh. its true though that from what anzu remembers from the recent matrix story he didnt really mention anything of the sorts . but that story is also A WHOLE bomb and a half dropped on us and kazehaya just so happened to exist in it compared to. anything else that went down in it anzu may have even just forgot any involvement he had in it at all. just that he didnt do anything bad for anzu to recall 😭👍

- for the disability rep anzu actually has a lot to add on this one because it is really nice But it also gives anzu another reason to bitch about /j this whole entire part will be a bit more of a joke than anything. well for the conclusion, but anzu did suffer a similar enough injury when anzu was younger as well, and anzu also leans in on the exact same way as him 😭 which. truthfully speaking, it is super nice they included that in his stance ! anzu did see that post by enst refs page as well and was happy to see it. jokingly though. he stole anzu's shebang 👎 boo 😔😔 cant even stand weird in ensemble star without local priest copyright infringing it 😔😔😔😔

okay to add a bit more to it, it was nice how they mentioned stuff ab his rehab in it along with the hospital visits and stuff. reminds anzu that anzu also had to keep going back to learn how to walk again 😭 but not in a bad way just wow they sure did they research ... and a normal person would probably be like 'he jus like me fr' but anzu is anzu so anzu will find a reason to hate him due to this too /j

anzu will try to read more stories that focus on him as well, though anzu also didnt really outright avoid stories where he's included (i.e read princess kaguya & the new global limited one from the link click collab in full recently (due to the event)). its true that all and all hes not that terrible But anzu just likes being a little hater over petty reasons related to kaname. like himeru 👊 enemy of anzus enemy is anzus husband or whatever they say. /j anzu's sis also luvs kazehaya a lot and hes like one of her topmost favs soooo its okay. anzu can never really fully hate him 😔 for her . thanks to all you 3 for sending these in again though !

[tkorules]

yknow the whole hetch (really weird name honestly) betraying ranboo. like. originally i assumed the person sending out "rogue frequencies" and the bypass of their system was done by hetch and that the person in the keynote vidoe (not the showfall media, the other one) was hetch. and like. it still could be but. why would they go to all that trouble? and according to the second special announcement they quite literally had to modify the interactive elements.

so. what was the point? it certainly wasnt meant to make hetch more convincing to ranboo as he saw NONE of it. was it meant to make hetch more convincing to the audience? but why would they need to do that? the audience cannot interfere with the social experiments as long as showfall doesnt let them do so. was it to put on a better show? and let me remind you, hetch almost INSTANTLY got the audience suspicious as soon as he needed to make up an excuse as to why ranboo couldnt leave.

and those notes under the posters. hetch didnt mention them. hetch doesnt claim responsibility for any of that stuff so im like.

actually, lets review the info we've seen about these mysterious person trying to interfere with showfalls plans and if anything seems to contradict them being hetch, or implies it.

specifically, let's go over the special keynote first

so, this person, they, as implied, are either 1. sending out a signal, or following one ("Where is this signal going?") but by their later line, when they finally like. actually connect instead of just glitching the screen and words they say ("Is this working?") seems to imply number 1 is whats happening.

afterwards they state that they dont have much time, and dont know what's going on, which feels like a contrast to hetch pretending to know a lot about whats going on, and the inner workings of showfall (he does acttually know i know im just saying with how he acts with ranboo) . and the next thing..

"I don't know what you are"

which feels.. hetch acts familiar with the audience. he knows about them and presumably knows what we are. its also quite literally on the on the site, that while showfall is adjusting to this new domain, they do seemingly know what they're doing here. and let me specifically highlight the specific phrasing. they say they dont know what we are. not who we are. what. which is like. a whole different level of unfamiliarity.

they then go on to say that it already found him (over ranboo's missing posters.) and says it got everyone but them. now this has several lore implications if you think this person is being honest but we're going to focus on how this seems to imply they're a part of the group , unlike hetch who refers to sneeg as "your friend" not our. which since sneeg is quite literally called the taken and is probably one of the people in the "everyone", so thereotically. sneeg shouldnt just be ranboos friend in that case.

they then declare that they have to save them and stop this.

so tldr of that whole reviewing the special keynote, several things that this person says, are discrepancies when compared with how hetch acts which could imply there is actually someone working against showfall entertainment.

another note, when that person connects with us, instead of it just glitching and such, it just. pauses the video until theyre done.

ANYWAYS

this makes the whole hetch plot thing feel like. theres an actual motivation for doing so. which it could just be entertainment yes but . there are now the possibilities its also to: conceal this persons activities. if its just another part of the show it makes showfall seem more unchallengable. and two. if ranboo manages to remember what happened LAST time, he will be far more inclined to not trust this person if they ever try and contact him.

so. that was my rant hope you liked it.

[single-malt-scotch]

of course i have things to say about lim life and bdubs. you know its funny and great- of course i would love his pov. but i still feel satisfied by what i saw and i dont feel like i do. there is something very different about witnessing a player this way, something we really havent had at all. and of everyone its bdubs. the guy who is associated with time and the guy who acts out so well to the narrative in front of him. and we dont lose anything- bdubs is still bdubs.

after double life we see him team up with people he hadnt from LL-DL. something fresh. together they create a family themed around time and at the center of the map they make a clock tower. they watch every death that spawns for entertainment. regardless of his need to stay with the clockers he continuously shows attachment to TIES/etho (mostly etho). it may be in jest but the clockers point out numerous times that this behavior doesnt shock them, that of course hes like that with etho and of course its muddying his alliances. and lets not forget the grudges held by most members of TIES (eventually Skizz on the list for a bit due to killing him), a neat detail in this funny little situation.

and then for a good whole episode it does make a problem- in the sense it confuses him and everyone else as to where he lies. he later defends the hell out of etho even from the meta jokes of being washed up, later in game of putting himself in front of a group that wants to kill etho, again in offer his life that etho doesnt take. we dont get to hear his thought process, whatever commentary he may be giving about why he really wanted to be with etho again and why he struggled to make it happen. we see it through everyone else. cleo, who is amused at bdubs' very typical behavior but evermore trying to convince him to not go wot etho. etho, who gets glimpses at bdubs from afar and a few moments where they meet in private, having a connection only two close friends could have alone. the rest of TIES who takes him in in brief moments but never hearing more. overall in the end hes around and hes trying to do good, hes "trying his heart out", theres attempts being made but we can see them slip and falter from things outside of his control. the timing is never right.

but no im not done actually. his attempt to help isnt just tied to etho. bdubs has shown himself to be caring and kind, and putting himself out there in order to help others. i think thats where he fell apart- he wanted to keep it all good between clockers and TIES, despite the family dynamic putting in stone that it wasnt possible. as a whole he wanted to be in the middle and this extended to many other interactions. there wasnt a single person that bdubs was actively against this season (yes including skizz- their dynamic was on the same level after he first fight so it became mutual imo), no long building hate, and the clockers were welcoming to others too in their alliances but bdubs did still stand out as the clockers denied TIES and he held on to them. further in we get to the moments where bdubs then offers himself up. its like there was a realization on the game in episode 7, they were far enough in that he thought maybe he could help just before it got worse. he went up to jimmy who's known to die first (yet someone he hardly interacted with) and desperately and repeatedly asks to be killed and of course jimmy takes it, hes only a few minutes away. and then of course he tries again with etho, twice, including helping a fight and etho doesnt take it. you can hear bdubs in the background still laying out what etho could do.

as the season reaches its end let me wind back a bit to deaths in general. bdubs earliest death was certainly an interesting one, one fight he was so confident about and completely failed at, missing numerous hits. and this isnt a surprise to me. bdubs was actually pretty.... well he lacked a lot of kills this season. and not knowing his time for sure through the episodes made this all more interesting to watch, you know? he never seemed like he was really seeking it out. even in a stream before session 8 scar and grian both say they have no clue what bdubs' time is. im sure someone added this up but for everyone else and the average watcher, we see him fumbling or giving his time all while not thinking at all about what he had left just before the end. and then hes the first one to go out in episode 8. its not that it wasnt expected, but his time being in the dark for so much of the series leaves you not thinking about it. it didnt seem like he died that much, it didnt seem like his timer was that now- you wouldnt know for sure unless you saw his pov. most of all, we never really hear him asking for time? there arent any key moments with him saying he really needs to kill. hes fighting, hes helping, but theres barely a hint of desperation to hunt people down- he just stayed in the place he usually was, around the tower, hoping to lend a hand.

and death again. how does his series end? unexpected, completely unknowing to what would kill him. impulse had killed him once earlier and tried to a second time and the cute thing about it? they were laughing the whole time. this could be the moment where youd say impulse got the kill he wanted. and then we get to bdubs' perma death and its impulse again and he never saw it coming- out of the game first that session and left to spectate everyone until the next start to die. quietly until he gets in the chat.. not unlike LL, but not for nearly as long.

and of course, so much of his time is spent in around the clock tower. this led to all of the clocker's demise, with ow dangerous of a location it became, and its all the more in character for each of them to go out there. theres of course something poetic to take from that.

so what does bdubs give us this season? why does it still mean something despite his pov? well it can mean whatever you want it to mean, it can add up to whatever narrative you took from limited life. i dont know if we will know for sure why bdubs didnt upload outside of what he loosely stated on stream. but forever hes someone i look to for an act that has so much to take from it. intentional or not hes putting something in i never see from anyone else. there doesnt need to even be an artistic reason for his choice to not post but his choices always add up to something and i do think he goes out there knowing full well what he can do. he played a type only he can play, because its inherently just who he is and he will never stop being him and that is so great. ill never doubt his decision no matter if it was purposeful, or personal. bdubs is still bdubs and that is all that i wanted.

[crippleprophet]

hi! i have a question regarding. doctors being shitty/being incredibly invasive and controlling

some background: ive had neuromotor symptoms since i was a toddler (i was 'bad enough' to have the school district pay for my pt/ot as a toddler) which was (badly) diagnosed as dyspraxia by a neurologist who then never saw me again after i completed pt/ot.

i still have all of those problems now despite on and off pt since then and consistent pt for over a year currently. we went back to my current hospital trying to see a neurologist to discuss the results of an mri i had at a different hospital and set up 2 appointments.

we had an appointment scheduled with a neurologist which we went to regarding my neuromotor issues + mri as well as migraines. all he talked about during the appt was the migraines and told me i wasnt drinking enough water despite me having pots and drinking more than 100oz a day and that i was just stressed. he did not ONCE mention any of the neuromotor issues and dismissed me when i brought them up. he also told us seeing the other neurologist would be unnecessary and that we should cancel the appointment. at the appt me and my mom agreed with him, but we were unhappy with the outcome of the appointment with him and decided we should keep the second appointment to act as a second opinion.

the day before the 2nd opinion, we get a call from the first neuro saying that he cancelled the 2nd opinion appointment after talking to the 2nd neuro. this is technically not prohibited in the hospital im at as far as i understand, and my mom is planning to call the ombudsman to file a complaint at the very least but both of us are at a loss for what to do. i know i am probably in a different hospital system than you are so the logistics of reporting this will be different, but do you have any advice for what to say? i am at a genuine loss and as long as this neurologist is my current doctor i have no idea if ill be able to see a different neuro for a second opinion lest he cancel that appointment too.

[tl;dr: i scheduled 2 appointments with 2 different neurologists to discuss neuromotor symptoms, a mri i had done at a different hospital, and migraines. i saw the first one and he was incredibly dismissive and told me to cancel the 2nd appointment i had scheduled. my mom and i agreed at the time but decided to keep it for a second opinion after the appt was over. the first neurologist canceled the 2nd opinion appointment the day before the appt without consulting me or my mom.]

disclaimer that i am in the US and also a minor. if you or your followers have any advice it would be greatly appreciated!! thank you and sorry this is so long!

god, that’s such bullshit, i’m so sorry. you don’t deserve to be dealing with this & that’s incredibly inappropriate behavior. i’m obviously just some guy on the internet so take all of this with a grain of salt / weigh it against your preferences & experiences - i don’t think there’s any one right or wrong way to handle this & i’m sorry you’ve been put in such an awful position. (also no need to apologize for being long - i’m about to write you a novel lol)

i definitely think contacting the ombudsman is a good idea & i’m really glad your mom is on your side; you can also find the complaint process for the medical board in charge of his licensure by searching [your state] medical board complaint. here’s an overview of what happens with that process:

if you’re on medicaid or medicare there are additional specific avenues of complaint through that.

i’m going to file a complaint against a doctor in the next couple of weeks for some fucked up shit of my own so my thought process for that has been like, i don’t expect anything to happen to him, but it might help some future person who complains for there to have been previous issues on file. you might be in a different emotional position, though - if your complaint going nowhere would be devastating, for example, it’s okay to factor that into your decision of whether to file one.

i also recommend checking your state laws around your rights to your medical records, and while there are ways to obtain it after filing a complaint, i’d personally try to get any test results or other documentation that you’d need to show a different physician before filing a complaint just to minimize the risk of somebody giving you grief & dragging it out. i went in person to ask for my bloodwork results from the shit doctor & let the rest of my record with them rot bc i don’t need to read the bullshit he wrote & certainly don’t want it impacting my care with someone else.

as far as getting a second opinion i think there are a few things to consider:

i’d personally be super careful when deciding whether to try to make another appointment with neuro#2. it could be that shitty neuro#1 just talked to the scheduling department or something, but if he talked to the doctor themself, it’s unfortunately really fucking likely that neuro#2 is already biased against you. most (not all - my pcp is fabulously untrusting of his peers) doctors will take a fellow doctor’s word over a patient’s any day.

do you have options that are outside of that hospital network, or something like a private practice that’s technically part of the network but uses their own scheduling system? if it’s an option i think getting as far away (in terms of connection, not literal distance) as possible is your safest bet; one of the very few good things about the US medical system is the lack of a centralized database, so in a lot of circumstances your medical record can’t follow you unless you let it. i’m a huge proponent of giving my doctors information on a need-to-know basis; my rheumatologist doesn’t know my pcp gave me tramadol while i was trying to get an appointment, for example, because i don’t want to be labeled drug-seeking.

if your only options are where neuro#1 would be able to see the appointment, it’s more dicey - hopefully the ombudsman has better / more specific advice, but if it were me, i’d probably try to make an appointment in person to get a sense of the vibe & if the person scheduling seems kind/decent, explain that i had a doctor cancel my appointment against my wishes & ask if they could make a note or something to only cancel it if i (or in your case maybe your mom) says so. kind of risky but this whole thing is a clusterfuck so it could be worth a shot.

is there any reason this neurologist needs to stay your current doctor? because like, if not, get your records and get the fuck out. usually i just ghost my providers but in this case it sounds like you’ll probably need to formally break up with him - if you have a follow-up scheduled then if you cancel that you can inform the front desk when doing so that you’re no longer going to be a patient at that office. heads up they’ll probably ask why, it’s up to you whether you want to be honest.

if you’re comfortable doing so, after you’ve extricated yourself from this provider, i’d recommend writing a public-facing review anywhere you can - google reviews for his practice / the hospital, your insurance website, healthgrades, etc - so other potential patients are warned. i’d basically say what you told me here about what happened.

as far as writing your complaints themselves, i’d try to found them on as much documented evidence from other providers as possible, because the system only respects itself. so for the complaint i’m working on, i’m going to include:

what the doctor did that was against current diagnostic guidelines, & cite those

previous diagnoses & medications he ignored

what i was subsequently diagnosed with & medicated with

statements he made that were factually incorrect, & citations of research disproving them

if he didn’t talk about your imaging you should definitely mention that too.

i hope some of that is helpful! i’ve been researching & sorting through my own neurological stuff so if there’s anything else i can do to help or support you feel free to send another ask or dm me! best of luck to you & you’ll be in my thoughts 💓🖤💓 other folks feel free to respond if you have further advice!

[dballzposting]

See when Goku died the second time it was such a morose and sensitive time and Chichi was due for another baby and there was just no room for negativity any more. It was sad and quiet and sweet and bittersweet and careful. She had a new beautiful baby boy and Gohan had a new baby brother.

It was a time of gentle healing. There was relief in the peace.

Because of that I'm very interested in the time when suddenly Goten was old enough that Chichi saw it fit to start beating him. It's been years and the tone of the house has been studious and sensitive, and the new baby has been such a blessing that no one has ever gotten THAT mad about anything lately. Chichi has not used the iron skillet on Gohan in this time, though there were a few times where Gohan felt it would be threatened - but mostly, he felt that he was old enough that that wasnt gonna happen anymore. He felt some sense of satisfaction at his own strength, and that the peace was earned. This house is an emotionally sensitive and intelligent one now.

But chichi is maligned and it's going to come out somehow. When Goten gets to be about 6, Chichi stops being comforted by his babyness and her patience starts to wear thin with him. It starts being ok to slap him, for some reason.

And I just imagine the SICK HORROR that Gohan would feel, in his bedroom, doing his schoolwork like a good boy, when he can hear his mother's tone go sharp in the other room, and then the unmistakable CRACK of a slap to the face. It's defintiely not her strongest, but it stings on babyfat.

The way Gohan's heart would SINK ... he would feel so sick immediately.. It's as if that behavior never left their house, and he's responding in an uncapped adverse way as if he's still young hinself - but unlike when he was young, he's lost the defensive emotional wall regarding it that would have spared him the embarrassment of tears. His defenses have disintegrated with disuse and the panic and pain and sickened SADNESS of hearing that from the other room is suddenly intolerable.

He would act but he knows that theres nothing he could say to get through to Chichi .. and he knows that he cant talk back to his mother. He has too much empathy for her at this present time, so while he DOES hurry out into the room and take Goten into his protective arms and beg their mom to not do that, to beseech how COULD she do that?, to remind her of their saddened circumstances, and to ultimately startle her by the way he's trembling and his voice in a pre-tears wounded cadence, he does not blame her like he should. He knows shes stressed.

Not much can really be done about Chichi so Gohan just tries to keep Goten close, and to specifically encourage him to leave the room with him whenever Gohan starts to sense that Chichi is operating on one nerve only. But who knows what is free to transpire when Gohan isnt around.

Chichi does try to train Goten a little bit, and gives up immediately + dissolves to tears when he goes super saiyan. I dont imagine this rejection by his mother felt good to Goten. And he does learn to fight over at Capsule Corp, but it's a completely different environment and circumstance than when Chichi cracks the wooden spoon over his head.

There is one time where Goten, as he learns about the world, wonders why there is a difference. And there's a day where he catches the spoon before it makes it to his head. As he and Chichi stare at the spoon, frozen in its trajectory, Goten doesnt know exactly what this means yet. He feels a bit shy at the defiance, and a lot of pride at having defended his organism - but then his mother mobilizes in a response of pure shock, fear, and pain. She starts to cry and it's clear she feels betrayed. It's clear he's in trouble. And Goten then is overwhelmed with the new knowledge that - oh, oh no, I'm not suppsoed to do that, I'm not suppsoed to dishonor my mother by getting in her way and going against her will, look at how upset I've made her, look at how much she doesnt love me right now! I've committed a grave defilement of our honor! I've lost her love!

So naturally he never does that again.

I've written about this before but it was only briefly + in the middle of a 6600 word post about GT Trunks, so I'll summarize to the best of my memory: Goten, as his mother's baby boy and saving grace, as her only source of happiness and salvation, as her only source of purity, and as a male who is always told how much he looks like his father (by whom she has taken pain from), feels personally responsible for his mother's emotionally state and feels BEYOND ABYSMAL whenever he feels that he has besmirched her. This is a response to a wound of early childhood and is a moodstate that is out of context in our present time, but is just as persuasive. He feels inconsolably depressed at these times because it's the feeling a baby would have when it got the sense that its mother didnt love it.

He's a happy guy otherwise and he'll go through life being so true to hinself UNTIL he's suddenly down. He's a martial artist + so in-tuned with hinself and his authenticity and his organism's natural healing resources so the effect isnt as PERVASIVE or ENDURING as it could be, but still detrimental.

He'll walk around on GT being a slag and playfully going against his mother's wishes for the priority of authenticity, but if his mother actuslly shed tears or expressed real distress that he's not making any real commitments or efforts toward marriage, then he would get down on his knees on the floor next to her chair and gently grip the arm that Chichi is using to cover her tears and he would promise her, promise her, promise her that he'll do better. As an old wound, he CAN NOT and WILL NOT end up like the father that everyone says he looks like, whose absence he has seen cause his mother irreparable misery and stress over the years. He'll be a good son and a better husband than his father ever was. He looks up a lot to Goku of course but in these moments, it's just between him and his mother, and he just wants to soothe her as he was able to do when he was a sweet baby boy and earn her love. He'll give her a good daughter-in-law and grandkids like she wants.

Goten is a wild man and he loves being himself BUT at times like this he takes a MASSIVE HIT regarding his percieved loss of purity. He knows love and pleasure and sincerity and beauty when he sees it, but at these times and in this moodstate, he feels like he deserves to die for all the pretty women's hands he has held and not honored through marriage. When in his frat years Kinto-Un temporarily rejected him on account of his shitting in one too many urinals, that triggered one of those episodes and he was AWOL for a short while.

Obviously this is clearly fucked. Chichi has made her baby boy responsible for her emotions, becasue she evidently cant moderate/regulate them on her own, when in parenting it's suppsoed to be the other way around. Though I know she loves and is loyal to her family so deeply, she has conducted herself in a manner that has colored her love as conditional and equaling to her satisfaction in her child. She is reactive and explosive and temperamental. She is emotionally immature. Why. I feel like she had a fine dad so why is she like this

Gohan knows this about her and he just sort of .. moves out about it. He takes refuge in his work. He starts his own family. He lets Goten visit as much as he wants. Gohan of course loves his mother and feels responsible for her in the way that one with a sensitive and elderly mother would, and he really does want her to be happy, but he also shuts down a lot of her behaviors and a lot of his responses to her emotions for the sake of his own wellbeing. But he also avoids the topic of her insanity and will not read any books that could explain her behavior or help him to heal, he just hyperfocuses on bugs and disassociates from himself to get by. Whatever

The only one who could ever tame ms Chichi BTW was Piccolo becasue he brought her much-needed peace and security.

Ms Chichi everyone

[misterradio]

okay here are some tron 2.0 thoughts TEE HEE....... you have been Spoiler Warned for REAL!

tron fans talk abt this game with me okay 🥺

THIS GAME IS BEAUTIFUL .... MWWWWWAH!!!!!! i just love all the different environment designs, the color coding that went into the different computer systems was really cool too. my main takeaway is that the visuals Rule.

the npc designs were cool too but i kind of wish there was More variety (visually as well as voice acting)... but i really enjoy the design direction here ::-) why so many bald antagonist though? lol (AND WHY SO MANY MEN?)

In regards to gameplay i felt like it was pretty standard? i ended up using the basic disc weapon for most of the game because switching weapons takes Way too long if youre actively fighting, which is kind of a shame cuz there are so many weapon options... i did really enjoy the energy claw though 👍also the light cycle racing SUCKED and there was a graphical glitch that made it so that a bunch of visuals to my cycle were missing so i couldnt even enjoy the new design that was hyped up lol. as complicated as gameplay felt up front it definitely felt much better as it went on so it was pretty good.

game progression was very straightforward which i didnt expect..? go do this and then do that, etc. i thought it would be more open. this isnt rlly a complaint bc at least i wasnt lost or anything.

finding all the build notes was thankfully not hard but i enjoy poking around as much as i can in games already... and i liked the mechanics of searching archive boxes and being able to read emails between people ::-) YAY NOSINESS !!! despite finding all the build notes i still didnt end with the highest version i couldve...🤔 no idea how that works then...

moving on 2 story...

all the characters felt a bit flat so that was unfortunate... i wouldve liked to see some more emotions from everyone, bit more personality, etc...

i dont rlly know where jet's attachment to mercury came from, is he in love with this girl, if so why?? im thinking that since she was the first program to really reach out and help jet, that he latched on to her. but as the player i was kind of neutral on her SORRY although her design is cool

i was in disbelief that lora died and i was thinking she would just have been digitized and b in the computer somewhere? and there are allusions to her at least being superficially present in the program ma3a/ma2a etc (they have the same actress ^^__^^) but neither jet nor alan mention this which really shocks me??!!!??? thats your deceased mom or wife can u show a bit of tenderness or something..... maybe this can be cooked up more in an AU or something . idk i was really hoping she (and yori) would be around. i held on to hope for so long ✊️

OBVIOUSLY WISHING TRON WAS THERE... but omg alan being in the digital world shocked me so much i really liked that HEHE. him wearing tron's outfit was fun. i saw someone else in the tag say this, but if tron is "retired" then where is he?? INQUIRING MINDS WANNA KNOW !! he and jet werent very fazed by being digitized which surprised me buuut they also have to adapt fast given the urgency of their situation..

i felt rlly bad that thorne died SNIFFLE SNIFFLE jet and alan just watched a real guy die in front of them thats MESSED UP!! he was really cool too i enjoyed the corruption concept ::-) i was really worried the three fcon employees were gonna die too but im glad they implied that they could be repaired and manifested again.. (what is the word for un-digitized..?)

evil ma3a was really cool 👍 tbh all the antagonists are cool except im neutral on the kernel. i was confused that he was red i thought he was evil like in the original movie with the MCP's soldiers.. but i think hes just a guy who happens to be red. and also trying to kill u but just bc you (jet) are a freak of computer nature and should not be there. thats fair. i enjoyed his boss fight too.

THE FCON MONSTER WAS RLLY COOL HOW AM I NOT SEEING ANY FANART OF THEM.... ::-( i have to fix this... ALSO I WISH they had dialogue. like are they even aware of their situation. missed opportunity !!

okay thats all i can think of now.

WAIT UM I READ THE COMIC CONTINUATION(?) the ghost in the machine AS WELL and i dont have many thoughts on it bc it was really confusing BUT i did enjoy the layers of horror and unreality which i really did not expect. was also expecting the titular ghost to have more to do with lora (SIGH I REALLY WANNA SEE HER AGAIN) but it didnt but thats okay. i really liked the art of the first book specificaly.....

do any tron fans also like soma (2015) haha just wondering [TWIRLS MY HAIR

[nacaharachuya]

Okay so i realised im a fucking idiot and that i’ve been sending you shit through “?” And i have no idea where those messages go through so whoopdy doo ig but in my defence i wasnt able to send anything any other way bc.. uhh.. yeah my email wasn’t confirmed n all that. Im telling u man i’m a whole ass boomer rn🤦‍♀️ can’t even remember how to send an ask smh.

Anyways i only now finished reading svs because i’ve been putting it off in favour of reading different fics (works from other fandoms and… ooc soukoku fics. Listen i hate mischaracterisation as much as the next guy but i find them very entertaining okay) and AAAUURGGHH WHAT A BANGER. The way you write is immaculate if svs was a food it’d have a savoury taste like i’d be liking my fingers n shit. I found out about it when you posted on twitter you updated it (it was the smut chapter, by the way) and i was like “huh” and decided to read it and my god am i glad I didn’t skip over that tweet.

Idk if this was on purpose or not but verlaine is kinda cringefail in your fic and i love it. I am a firm believer that as badass as verlaine is he is undeniably embarrassing and i need MORE of that.

My one criticism for svs is that we needed more adam scenes. He should have been added like really, unnecessarily early on in the fic and act as a third wheel in the fic. But like a third wheel soukoku did not want or ask for but he’s just kinda there they can’t really get rid of him. Chuuya and dazai in their divorce arc arguing and adam is in the background thinking “i could crack a really funny joke from this” (on that note i added the lines “Adam’s blabbering makes more sense now, so they act as if nothing has happened. “When I lift this veil, you will seal the deal with a kiss.” He can’t stop himself from laughing, “I hope you enjoyed that joke too.” “We didn’t,” Verlaine says from across the shrine. “Paul be quiet.”” In my “collection of fanfic lines I chuckled at” in my notes. He’s so silly i love him. I love how he laughs at his own jokes he just like me fr.)

Anyways here are like two extra svs doodles. I keep thinking about how you said that chuu can fluctuate between genders (literally) and its so… zamn.

And reading the scene where verlaine is brushing chuuya’s hair inspired me to draw this

I have no idea how long chuuya’s hair is supposed to be like idk if it’s “yeah his hair is a little longer than it is in canon haha” or “yeah mf got some LONG ass hair looking like rapunzel”. Also I don’t remember if his lil ribbon was red or blue but.. i jus went with blue and i didn’t know if the pearls were supposed to be like on his head or woven into his braid so i just went with the latter. And again ALSO i know he was barefoot but i’m not drawing his fucking dogs okay.

This ask is long as hell never let me talk again LMAO

Currently looking at a detail i forgot in the drawing… not pointing it out in hopes you don’t notice it either smh but GOD DAMMIT 🤬🤬🤬

DAWG I OPENED THIS YESTERDAY IN SHOCK IA M ALWAYS BLOWN AWAY BY YOUR ASKS AND ART IT MAKES ME FEEL SO LOVED AND SO CRAZY LIKE!?!?! I'M SO GLAD YOU LOVED IT ENOUGH TO MAKE ART I SAVE IT AND LOOK AT IT CONSTANTLY ;_; IM LIKE.....

AND ALSO THANK YOU. I need svs criticism and ur right I should have introduced more characters earlier I just got carried away with skk because...IDK BUT ADAM WAS MY SAVING GRACEE. He was so silly I wanted to add him sooner but I was like wait....no... BUT HE IS IN THE SEQUEL!!! DW!!! His silly ass is there and he's cracking them jokes and Verlaine is like o_o. THE ADAM LINES WERE SO FUN TOO CAUSE HE'S NOT CRINGE HE'S JUST....HIM.

Verlaine is cringe-fail on purpose tho and I'm glad you saw that because I see him as an incredibly pathetic person who can't do normal human things. He would like bite open a metal can or rip it open with his hands because he doesn't know what a can opener is. He is that type of guy.

The art is just immaculate bro like straight-up BEAUTIFUL. Chuuya's literal genderfluidity is something I'm glad people like cause when I imagine divinity I think of someone not bound by sex or gender and whatnot plus I just don't think he'd give a fart. so like....world's most wonderful tits...but he's shorter.

THE WEDDING OUTFIT IS SENDING ME TO THE GRAVE THO LIKE. IT"S PERFECT AND IDK WHAT DETAIL YOU MISSED CAUSE I FORGET EVERYTHING BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT I"M. THE HAIR LENGTH I DIDN"T SPECIFIY !!! He looks so *crying emoji cause I don't have my phone* you don't have to draw his toes I just think barefoot chuu running up the stairs to meet dazai is very him. perseverance.

BOYCACA WHAT IS YOUR TWT LET ME FOLLOW YOU AND BOTHER YOU THERE AND SPREAD THE BOYCACA AGENDA