#I really want too

[imari4444]

Imma ramble about a fan fic idea I had centered around the nameless bard. (Warning, a lot of text ramble)

Okay so Yknow how there’s a lot of fics where the nameless bard comes back to life?

When i first joined the genshin fandom i used to eat these fics up, but something that always upset me was the lack of nameless bard reincarnation fics (i think i came across one in my hours of internet searching). Let me ramble further here… to me, reincarnation and ‘resurrection’ are two completely different concepts.

Coming back to life; that person is still them, same memories, same face, taken right from death and brought back in the future.

Reincarnation however? New relationships, new face, new person, and sometimes the character doesn’t even remember there past life.

So before I wrote my current fic I use to play around with a fic idea that would have been nameless bard centric. The nameless bard or carmen as I call him would have been reborn in Mondstadt about 14-16 years before the Dvalin crisis. (Building relationship with the mond characters wayyy before venti even wakes up)

At first he’d have no recollection of his past life, just feelings and senses of Deja vu.

When his hair started growing out as a little kid he’d braid it in the way that felt right to him (his classic braids) and I had this funny scene in my head where an adult would coo at baby Carmen like “oh! Taking after Barbatos are we?!” And baby Carmen would feel so offended that he’d cut his hair short the following day. Yeah… drama (also when venti does arrive in Mondstadt… so much miscommunication )

Carmen immediately doesn’t trust Barbatos at all! Because seeing Barbatos face feels off, and the idea of a god ruling Mondstadt’ feels off, so being compared to him just makes him the pettiest kid ever.

Also to add spice to Carmen’s wounds I planned that he’d be a ward of the church like rosaria, and be an unwilling devote of Barbatos (rosaria is his role model of rebellion of course!)

Later in the fic he’d start to remember everything! And of course Barbatos just becomes even more suspicious ! Because he’s wearing his past face and for some reason Barbatos has the credit for aiding the rebellion even though Carmen was the leader and definitely doesn’t remember a winged god there.

But Carmen would ignore this in favor of finding out what happened to his family. Beginning the serching of trying to find out what happened to his friend and little brother venti when the stormterror Crisis begins.

I have more silly ideas with this AU, but I haven’t been able to write them since I’m focusing on Windwheel. However I have considered once I finish book one I could write this story (since it’ shouldn’t be too long -) before continues Windwheel but in case I didn’t, I wanted to share the main idea because it’s been in my head for years! I needed to write it somewhere!!!

In case I do ever write the full story in my head I think I’m going to call this non existent fic ‘A second chance at freedom,’ so… I can organize my tumblr tags… I like organizing sue me ;-;

[beach-love-sparkles2]

Have you ever watched yourself get fucked through a mirror?

I have not 🥲 but it’s on my “f*ck-it list ” 😂

[pangur-and-grim]

one thing that took me embarrassingly long to learn is "sometimes when people say things, they will not be true."

I used to tell people about this revelation and they'd be like yeah.....duh.....but like, why wouldn't my base assumption be that you're communicating to me in a straightforward manner. anyway, I get scammed a lot.

[wanologic]

sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool

[romanceyourdemons]

so much love for characters who are desperately unsure whether they’re a good person, a redeemable person, a person worth saving, but are absolutely certain that they’re a grade a hottie

[dorothywonderland]

Is it considered plagiarism if you're copying your own comic?

╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭

[inkskinned]

you said you were stuck in a time loop, which was fine. i feel like late-stage capitalism has us all in a time loop, ammiright? you came barging in at 5:33. in the morning. i hadn't even processed the idea of coffee.

but you had this look of utter panic in your eyes. terror like the ocean. you grabbed my cheeks. im in a time loop.

i don't know why in movies the first reaction is to deny it. when someone is panicking like that, it's not appropriate to ask them to calm down. it didn't matter if i believed it, what mattered was that you believed it so much that it was consuming you.

so here we are. i pour you some of the dark roast. "you look like utter and entire hell," i say.

you push your fingers into your eyes. "you always say that."

i try to think of something funny to say that i wouldn't have said on previous time loops, but jokes don't land without the proper timing (lol). "remind me to think -"

"-yeah, of a joke that only works in the future. and before you say anything, i know you're pissed i just stole your punchline." you bolt the coffee, which is wild. it's very hot. you don't seem to notice.

i blow on mine to cool it down. i both am very pissed at you and also i can't see you in this amount of panic without wanting to help. but i'm also not really sure what we are, not since i saw you kiss her like that, no offense. it just was like, kind of rude when you knew i liked you.

and besides. i'm just like, barely a person. i write omegaverse fanfiction. i love the concept of a time loop, but what the fuck am i gonna do? send an alpha in there? i open my mouth.

you point at me. "you're about to ask why me. and then say some disparaging shit about yourself. i'm just a nerd who plays dnd or something. that self-own is slightly different each time." you sigh. "i know you think you can't really help me. i don't know who can help me. i only came to you because you fucking believe me." you check your watch, sigh, and throw your head back. you cover your eyes with one hand. "i've come here on 26 separate revolutions," you say. "you have believed me every time. and yeah, i have no idea how you fit into this but i just -" you sigh again. "i just like fucking talking to someone about it."

"do you need more cof-" i start, but you're already holding the empty cup out. i frown at it. "you're not getting any more until you promise not to bolt this one like an animal."

you laugh a little and sit up, pushing your hair out of your face. "okay, that's new dialogue. but to be fair to you, i'm not usually this rude. i'm still pretty new at all of this." you check your watch again. another sigh. i guess you're cruising for a personal best in the Sigh Olympics.

i almost tell you im not an NPC but i've played enough video games to know i'm very much an NPC. i pour you another cup. "so what happens in the loop?"

"really bad explosion." you mutter into the mug. you put your elbows on the table (rude) and bury your face in your arms like an angsty teenager. one hand floats up while you talk, because evidently you literally can't talk without your hands. "i have to save the day and there's this bomb and i have no bomb training and it keeps moving, you know."

"do i die?"

you peek up from your arms. "yeah. bigtime. you keep trying to run or stay or do anything and you always super die."

"oh."

"to be fair, like, everyone dies in it though.... so you're in good company."

i hate that you make me laugh. i hate that being around you always feels tingly and strange, this electric tension between us. something that is evidently (given how you stuck your tongue down a stranger's throat literally 3 days ago) (well. 3 for me) super one-sided. i take a sip of my coffee and close my eyes.

i die today, i guess. a little spark of panic starts at the top of my hands and starts whipping up my wrists.

"shit," you say. you look at your watch and jump to your feet. "i have to go. if i can come back, i will. i am still trying to figure out when is best to do everything, you know? the order of stuff. maybe morning isn't good for us."

i look up at you and think about how you keep kissing me in the back of my car and in alleyways and in the dark. and i can never fucking get a read on you. and i also think about how incredibly panicked you look. how broken. how long have you been doing this? "i don't want to die," i say.

you glance downwards. "well, you're not really dead, you'll come back in the loop."

"but i will have died." my hands are shaking. i am trying really hard to stay calm.

you push your hands through your hair again. "i really have to go. i will have this discussion with the next version of you, though. it is like, something i am thinking about."

"but i don't get a next version," i say. i don't really have the language for this, because i haven't had 26 tries with you. i only have my memories: you, a week ago. drunk and telling me you loved me in my ear. you, kissing her anyway. you, months ago, throwing up on my birthday, whispering to me i ruin everything i touch, always, over and over. please don't ask. i can't ever fucking have that be you.

i run my finger along the rim of the mug. "i don't want to die in this one."

you seem baffled by this. "i get that but - time will reset, you'll be fine, you won't even remember we talked about this."

"but i know now." i stand up too. "i have to live the rest of this day knowing i could die. knowing i probably am going to."

"you could always die, to be fair."

i feel my hands get out of control. "earlier, you said i always say a different insult about myself. what if you're just going through different parallel universes and those are all just different - but real - versions of myself? what if you're not in a time loop, you're in a fucking universe loop?"

"if it helps, i've wondered this too. also, you're hot in all of them. if that helps."

i point at you. "no flirting. i'm trying to figure out if i die today."

"who's flirting?" you catch my wild hands and give me that long, perfect smile. like we're in this together. "i won't let ya die." you check your watch and sigh again. "well. maybe not this time."

i grit my teeth. you are so not making quips at me while i try to explain the existential dread i'm having. "does the time loop reset if i fucking kill you?"

"honestly i don't know how long it continues after i die, because i just wake up. it could be that the loop goes until the explosion for everyone, and we're all in the loop, or it could be that when i die, the loop restarts. when i die i wake up, is all."

i pull away from you and stalk into the kitchen and start doing all 3 of my dishes. "okay, first, you know i was joking. and secondly, this is exactly my point. you don't know if this is just a parallel universe. maybe in the ones where you died, the explosion happened and nobody reset and it's just you travelling." i have to stop and push the heel of my palm into my eyeball. "... how often have you died?"

i look at you. you look at me. you give me this very sad, halfway smile and a little what can ya do shrug. something in that action seems so old and weary that i want to burst into tears.

"i have to go," you say. "really. for real. there's this family of five i save from getting into a car crash. and i know it's like oh but we're all gonna die in the explosion anyway, what's the point. and..." you shrug again. "it matters to me, is all. at least i saved them for now. at least i saved anything."

you pad over to me and wrap me in a tight hug. you always seem so tall against me. i feel your cheek rest against the top of my head for a moment. for a second, it's just us, and the space is warm, and my heart is a little broken hare.

you leave me there, and i stand in my stupid badly lit kitchen with my stupid mugs. i think about you. i start texting my mom that she needs to get out of the city, but it feels pointless.

i don't know what to do. tomorrow is the same day for you. but i have to prepare to die in my today.

[chloesimaginationthings]

What if Henry found Springtrap first in FNAF..

[waveoftheocean]

finally finished this piece!! (originally for superbat week day 4: on a case/undercover)

[the-meme-monarch]

was thinking abt how anya sleeps by the polle statue. which is motion activated to start talking.

+ i like drawing polle as a Character

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

do you even remember the lives that you threw away like trash

continuation of this

[phaoi]

PHUMPKIN ALERT!! 🎃💀🌈

[musubiki]

my favorite fields of mistria boys 🥰

[skrs-cats]

post oots - bramblestar's storm

[lemon-wedges]

Im gonna be honest, i watched The Menu last night and all that been on my mind since then is getting a cheeseburger

[what-am-i-doing-in-this-fandom]

Yeah, I don't know about you, Fidds, but I'd fold at this 🙏

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