#I really really can't
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Nothing says the holidays in retail like being embarrassed on the walkie by your boss and then two different people in leadership above you coming over to chew you out.
I held it together for the rest of the work day and then cried the whole 45 minute drive home.
The worst part is that I didn't even do anything wrong. They were mad about my "productivity issues." Which aren't real. Their expectations are just insane.
#i need to get through my last fucking class so i can get the fuck out of here#i can't handle another holiday season like last year#i really really can't#personal#irl
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Aaaaand one of my cats is sick
I can't fucking do this
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#vent in tags#i don't think i can keep doing this#i don't think i can go another year of just following the same routine over and over again#nothing ever changes. and nothing ever will because i won't let it#i want things to change i want to get better i promise i do#im so tired of feeling this lonely this miserable i want to be normal please#i want to know what it feels like to be normal#but i just i dont know. i dont know why i wont let myself get help (but i do know) it just seems so far away#i just want to be happy#i just want to love myself and be happy and live a normal life i want to be normal#but i cant.#i can't keep living like this i can't make it another year i really really can't. i promise i'm trying but it just gets harder and harder#i can't make it another year#i really really can't
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trying to figure out how to write an email :(((
#If i don't get everything across correctly#then my experiences will be misunderstood#and I will possibly have to re-take the hardest class I've ever taken#which would also possibly mess with my financial aid for this year#and my ability to go abroad#and my relationship with the professors in my major#feeling very catch-22 right now but I can't push through this#I really really can't#I don't know how to proceed!!!!#Having to do this shit over again would put my mental health in a shit ass spot for the next semester and possibly longer!! I just know it!!#mypost
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#i don't believe that people for serious reasons sort their books any way but by author#and then obviously by release date/series within that#i am being told that i am being JUDGY#also if you sort your books any other way HOW DO YOU FIND THEM#i really need to know#polls#can't believe i forgot to include genre in here
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thought that one Alastor scene would look cool in comic lettering, so i drew this
#i almost can't believe it's only my first time drawing adam#despite him being one of my fav character#he's such an asshole i love him your honor#the last panel is really a 2 seconds before disaster kinda thing aiugzhekjiu#hazbin hotel spoilers#hazbin hotel#alastor#adam#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel adam#comic#myart
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(✿◕‿◕) die (ꈍ ꒳ ꈍ✿)
#MY GIRLLLLLLLL <333333 you're doing amazing sweetie kill them all you deserve to#anyway. coping mechanism. the problems in my life i could solve if society just let me have a death note#this show really is an exercise in patience and suffering i get SO squicked out#by how much the horrible characters and situations mirror the insanity of what's happening in real life#also the revelation that some of the actors are Exactly as shitty as their characters are is. ugh.#but every time i'm like okay i can't take it i need to stop to protect my headspace#i think of kimiko and am like.... no... i need to see my gir....#hope karen gets jucy roles in other shows too PLEASE#the boys#kimiko miyashiro#karen fukuhara#theboysedit#tvedit
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jack and tommy's big conversation :''''(
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This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.
"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.
"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.
I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.
#I didn't watch Teen Wolf but I know this happened to that Stiles character#I'm not active in any DC fandom but it looks like this happened to Tim Drake and to a lesser extent Dick and Jason#In prequels-era Star Wars it seems to be Obi-Wan; he's the spark/focus of this post here; bring back his flaws I like that he kind of sucks#sometimes a Fandom's Darling comes out of an Author's Darling! usually Fandom's are vessels to fuck the “hottest guy” available though#I will probably turn reblogs off if this spreads too far because I really don't care if people write Mary Sue fanfic; can't cast that stone#squinting at every “intersex” tag like Inigo Montoya: “I don't think that means what you think it means.”#honestly the fantasy intersex thing is a separate & more serious post; but the fandom usage is a red/yellow flag for me when searching#tossawary fandom#fandom's darling
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I probably won't finish this piece any time soon, but I wanted to share the unfinished version with you anyways!
#i'm just so busy these days I can't find the time to work on bigger illustrations#:(((#I still really like how this looks tho#So I wanted to show it to you all anyways#this is south downs aziracrow#good omens#good omens fanart#good omens 2#aziraphale#crowley#aziraphale and crowley#ineffable husbands#ineffable husbands fanart#good omens 2 fanart#my art
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#For me it's peach. can't stand them#polls#fruit#why do you people hate bananas so much. i expected the pear and pineapple hate but bananas? really?#>1k
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...
#sylvrn art#illust#mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#I can't stop watching this game over and over#really like some of the analyses I've seen on the game#made a lot of things like WOAH for me#anyways quick nighttime drawing bc the game's whole vibe is stuck in my head#eyestrain
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don bluth films occupy a weird space because he's both inarguably an auteur who directs very strange, earnest, often "ugly" films but also a guy who near exclusively made movies for 8 year olds in the home video era. so basically everything he's ever done is a grimy, dreamy rumination on death and spirituality and has a direct to video sequel called something like secret of nimh 2: mrs. brisby's holiday adventure
#this happens to a lot of family films obviously#but i can't really think of another director that has a familiar divide between a very stylistic and thematically specific body of work#and direct to video kids movie-quality sequels#the sequels to musker and clements films don't really have the same severe difference in tone to the originals#what happened to neverending story didn't happen to every wolfgang peterson movie#etc
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in spite of everything, I had fun <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itafushikugi#jjk 271#well we made it :'>#im kind of ignoring a lot of the tag rn ghsdff ik people are upset#if u follow me u know th full extent of my thoughts on the wrapping up of the series but tl;dr the caption says it all#this series meant a lot to me and im working on a bigger tribute to fully express that love and gratitude#but take a redraw 2 tide u over for now#im just so happy. its bittersweet but those r my kids n theyre tgt and theyre okay#i think the return to normalcy is good fr them. i say let them rest n b together n process everything in time#/i'm/ satisfied with what i got out of jjk as a whole and that's all that matters to me#however ik that not everyone shares tht sentiment n thats valid!#regardless of how u feel abt the finale i hope that u at least take time to remember things abt the series that brought u joy#thats all i can say#oh yeah anyway i lightened up megumi's expression his face is so funny in that panel i can't believe he really said -_- until the very end#still tho i think megu deserves a content lil smile
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Literally begging anyone who can vote in US elections to vote, and to vote against Trump. Which means voting for Harris, not abstaining or voting third party.
My family actually did move here from an authoritarian country, where voting literally didn't matter, they literally did throw out your vote, and they literally did assassinate citizens who spoke out against them.
We would all very much like to keep living in a country where those things are not the case!
You know, the same things that Trump and his stooges have openly said they want to do. And two of the main propaganda lines for why people in the US shouldn't vote, which is a lie.
Voting matters. The parties are not the same.
And make sure to vote in down-ballot races!!!
And like. The fact that voting matters in the US is a very real reason for hope. It is something you should genuinely appreciate. We can make a difference.
And a lot of people risked their lives or even died to earn that right, and it's a right not everyone has.
#interrupting our regularly scheduled programming for a voting matters psa#because I just saw like 5 posts encouraging people not to vote and those posts are bullshit!!!#us politics#election 2024#american politics#2024 election#uspol#voting#voting matters#the parties are not the same#voting rights#democrats#democratic party#united states#not news#yes I also really do wish voting third party had a chance of working#but it doesn't#yes biden's policy on palestine is atrocious and harris's is unlikely to be much better#but that doesn't change the fact that we DON'T live in an authoritarian dictatorship (yet)#and it doesn't change the fact that there is a massive difference between trump and harris#you will have a much harder time helping palestinians if trump wins and starts “crushing” pro-Palestine protests (direct quote from him)#and wrecks the economy so people can't afford to donate or to take the time to protest#me
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one last late entry for superbat week :D day 2: accommodation mishaps! inspired by that time they had to share a bed in superman/batman annual vol 1 (2006)
#superbat#superman#batman#bruce wayne#clark kent#dc#dc comics#dcu#my art#mine#superbat week 2024#YEEHAWWWW#can't believe i actually finished another entry but superbat really has me so so pumped to draw
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