#I really hope this doesn’t scare you away

[rafescvntyclubgf]

𝓕𝓮𝓫𝓻𝓾𝓻𝓪𝓯𝓮𝔂

���​​🇴​​🇸​​🇹​ ​🇹​​🇮​​🇲​​🇪​

𝙻𝚘𝚘𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝙸𝚗𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙾𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚉𝚘𝚎𝚢

𝐑𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

+18 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓸𝓻 𝓓𝓝𝓘

𝙰𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗 𝚊𝚌𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚗𝚘 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚙, 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚞𝚐𝚐𝚕𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚘𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎. 𝙴𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞’𝚟𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚐𝚘𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚝, 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗. 𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚒𝚜𝚗’𝚝 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘 𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝚎𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛; 𝚑𝚎’𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗.

cw | smut, swearing, pet names, unprotected p in v, fingering, cum tasting, oral (female receiving), heavy angst, reader gets hit by a car

𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙

You adjust the weight of your shopping bags, looping them higher up on your arm as you step out of the bookstore. The crisp February air nips at your cheeks, but the warmth of the two coffee cups in your hands makes it bearable. You balance your phone between your shoulder and ear, voice light with amusement.

“I still don’t get why you made me leave the bookstore,” you sigh.

Rafe chuckles on the other end of the line, the sound deep and familiar. “Because we got plans, princess—you’d still be in there if I let you.”

You roll your eyes as a smile slips across your lips. “Not true. I would’ve left eventually. Maybe.”

“Mhmm… Yeah, sure.”

You stroll carefully on the busy street, walking with the flow of traffic, getting in their last-minute Valentine’s Day shopping. “You almost done with your errand, baby?” You ask, shifting your bags again.

“Mhmm… Walkin’ toward you, sweetheart.”

“I got you your favorite,” you smile as you lift his coffee slightly, watching as he smiles. 

“My girl. Thank you—” You barely register the car driving through the alley before the force slams into your side. The world tilts violently as your feet lift off the ground, coffee cups slipping from her grasp. You hit the pavement hard, pain jolting through your body. Your phone skids across the sidewalk, Rafe’s voice cuts off,  and everything goes dark. 

Your eyes flutter open, a steady ring sounding in your ears. People gather around you, rushing to see if you're okay and what’s happened. 

“Oh my God—Oh my God, baby?” You blink up at a man crouching beside you, his face pale, hands trembling as his breathing comes out fast and uneven. You groan, wincing as you push yourself up onto your elbows, feeling your pulse bang in your head. 

“I—I didn’t see her, man,” the guy panics, running a hand through his hair. “I swear, she-she-she fucking came outta nowhere—”

“Blame her again, and I’ll fuckin’ kill you,” the man beside you snarls.

“I’m fine,” you whisper, his eyes returning to yours. 

“Are you sure?” He asks anxiously, as his big hands hover over your body like he’s scared you’ll break. “Keep your eyes on me, alright?” The man asks gently as he strokes your cheek. His blue eyes are wide with panic, his strong jaw tight, like he’s barely holding himself together.

“Who are you?”

His blood drains from his face completely as the words push through your quivering lips, stabbing him in the heart. His lips parted, but for a moment, no words came out. 

“Baby, it’s me. It’s Rafe—” He whispers weakly.

Rafe? He looks down at you perplexed–a look in his worried eyes telling you his name should mean something to you. His voice is reassuring, like he’s hoping it’ll bring you a wave of clarity, but it doesn’t… It’s just a name.

“What’s happening?” You ask as you try your best to hold back tears. 

“Hey, hey, easy,” he says quickly, his hand cupping your cheek, brushing away a stray tear with his thumb. “Just stay still, okay? The ambulance is coming.”

Your pulse thunders in your ears as you look at him—really look at him. His face twists in worry, his brows drawn together like this moment is doing nothing short of tearing him apart. But you don’t know him or how you got here…

You squeeze your eyes shut, panic creeping up in your throat, making it difficult to breathe. “I don’t understand.”

Rafe swallows hard, his grip slightly tightening. “It’s okay,” he says, though his voice wavers, trying to assure you both in one breath. “You—You… Uh,” he struggles before clearing his throat. “You hit your head on the ground. You just need a second, okay?” You weren't sure a second would matter because looking at him—this man who was holding onto you like you were his entire world—you felt nothing but empathy for a stranger. “You know me, sweetheart.” 

“I don’t.”

Rafe looks away, trying to collect himself as tears pool in his eyes. “Where the hell is the ambulance, huh?” He screams, his voice breaking with sadness as he looks around. “What's taking them so long?” 

Rafe’s never known fear like this… Everything that he knew to be true was gone in a moment. Your words shattered something inside him, but he refused to let go.

Rafe cups your face in his hand again, tracing his thumb over the soft skin of your cheek, trying to ground you both. “It’s okay,” he whispers, his voice thick with emotion. “We’re okay. You’re just hurt. You hit your head—it’s just the concussion talking. You know me. You… You know me, sweetheart,” he smiles as his lips tremble.

He needed you to remember–needed you to feel what you had always felt when you looked at him. He needed the woman you were just a few short moments before, so he did the only thing he could think of doing. 

He kissed you. 

Rafe’s lips press against yours–soft and gentle—a silent plea for you to remember. But then he felt it: the slight hesitation, the way you tensed up, just barely, but it was enough.

He pulled back, praying he was wrong, hoping to see a sliver of clarity in your eyes, but all he saw was confusion. Rafe’s stomach twists, his hand drifting off your cheek, resting lightly on your hand instead, suddenly feeling like it didn’t belong there either.

Sirens wail in the distance as Rafe weaves his fingers in yours, holding you tight. 

“You’re gonna be okay, baby,” he assures. His eyes stay locked on yours as they lift you into the ambulance. “I’m right behind you, okay?” The paramedics close the doors before he can say anything else–the emergency vehicle streaming down the road toward the hospital. 

Rafe doesn’t waste a second, turning and running toward his car, fighting through people on the street as he digs into his pocket for his keys. He lifts them to the ignition–his whole body trembling as he turns the car over, speeding in the direction you went. 

He reaches for the speaker, turning down the volume, trying his best to hold in his emotions as the song you were singing on the car ride there pours out the speakers.

His chest tightens, and his gaze locks ahead as his nose fills with the sweet smell of your favorite flowers, the large bouquet resting in the passenger’s seat. 

This was supposed to be a perfect night.

Now, he’s speeding through the city, his pulse hammering, trying to convince himself that everything wasn’t falling apart. That he’d get to the hospital and everything would be fine–that that moment you needed would have come and passed.

That he would have his girl back. 

He replays the kiss in his mind, over and over again, refusing to blink as he stares at the road ahead, knowing that if his eyes beat shut, the tears glimmering inside will give way. 

The hospital comes into view, and the second he pulls into the parking lot, he’s out of his car, feet pounding against the asphalt as he sprints toward the entrance. The waiting room is packed; the hallways are bright and sterile. 

“Ma’am,” he yells as he spots a nurse. “Y/N?” He asks with urgency. 

“She’s in room 214 just down the hall,” she gestures down the way with a nod. “Follow me–”

Rafe runs past her, stumbling into the room and reaching for a full breath.

He bites his cheek as he sees you already lying in the hospital bed, tucked into a crisp white sheet. The lights are drawn low; your beautiful eyes shut.

Rafe looks down at you, seeing the little bruise blooming on your cheek with a slight gash beneath it.

His eyes flick to the sink in the corner of the room. Rafe saunters over, turning on the faucet, dampening a towel before stepping to your side. He presses it against your cheek; featherlight touches as he cleans it away.

“I got you, baby,” he whispers, his voice barely audible and laced with tears. “You’re okay. You’re gonna be fine.”

Your lashes flutter open, making Rafe freeze, his beautiful eyes set on yours. You were scared, but nothing even close to how you were the first time you woke up. And even though you didn’t remember Rafe before this, you felt him.

Rafe pushes out a shaky breath as he looks down at you, brushing your hair off your face. “Hey,” he whispers. 

You look at him, your lips parting, wanting desperately to say something, but nothing comes out. 

Rafe gives you a soft, weak smile as he takes your hand again, brushing his thumb over the top. “You don’t have to talk. Just rest, okay? I’m not leavin’. I’ll be right here, okay?” 

The room settles into a quiet rhythm—just the soft beeping of the monitors and the distant hum of hospital sounds filtering through the walls. Rafe hasn’t moved from your side.

The doctor pushes away the curtain before stepping inside, giving you both a reassuring smile. He flips through your chart, skimming your health history again. “How are you feeling?”

You exhale slowly as you look up at the doctor from your bed. “Okay. Just a little foggy; a little sore,” your voice breaks under pressure.

“You took a pretty rough hit, but your x-rays came back clear. No fractures, just bumps and bruises. That foggy feeling is coming from concussion–a mild traumatic brain injury or TBI.” 

Rafe’s grip on your hands instinctively tightens. “Umm…” He asks uneasily before clearing his throat. “Is that why she can’t remember anything–”

“Yes, we’re looking at PTA or post-traumatic amnesia. Everyone handles it differently–”

“Differently?” Rafe asks. “How-How so?” 

“For some patients, PTA lasts minutes—for some, months. Some things could come back in flashes, others over time. But given the nature of the injury, I’d say she has a very good chance of regaining everything.”

“You hear that, baby?” He looks down at you, his voice shattered but a little more hopeful than before. You smile and nod before looking back to the doctor. 

“You just have to be patient with her; reassuring–”

“I can do that,” he answers quickly. Your heart breaks for him. At the moment, the reason he was sitting next to you is lost, but you know enough to see that he is struggling. He was scared, too. Your fingers squeeze him, giving him a small gesture of reassurance.

He looks down at you before swallowing hard, exhaling a shaky breath through a soft smile before returning to the doctor. “So, she’s gonna be okay,” he asks.

The doctor nods. “Yes. She just needs some rest, assurance, stability, and time.” 

⊹ 💌 ⁺ ˳ ✿ . ♥️ ࿐

Rafe keeps his hand on your lower back, leading you from the car up to your downtown apartment. Your eyes search around, taking in everything seemingly for the first time. It was new to both of you–the two of you moving in just weeks before.

“Any of this look familiar? He asks as he helps you out of your jacket. You shake your head ‘no’. Of course, he wants you to remember things… He wants you to feel comfortable and safe, but there was some solace in knowing you didn’t remember this as well because, for the moment, the only memory lost was him. 

The apartment is beautiful, warm, and inviting–a love letter of your life together so far, picture after picture, memories that you’d eventually get back.

Rafe watches you closely as you take it all in, knowing the moment the photo was taken meant nothing, hoping for you to see how much he meant to you at that moment at least. 

You follow Rafe as he moves into the kitchen, grabbing a vase off the table, taking out some older flowers, and replacing them with new ones. You smile brightly, melting his heart as he replaces them with red roses instead. 

“Valentine’s Day?” You ask as you walk toward him, stepping into the kitchen. He sets the flowers back before returning to your side.

Rafe wraps his arms around you, pulling you gently against his chest, his chin resting lightly on top of your head.

“Yeah, baby.”

You both take a deep, needed breath. His cologne is rich, a warm vanilla with a hint of tobacco. You rest your head on his muscular chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. Tears start to well in your eyes again. 

“Hey,” he whispers, his hand tracing slow, soothing circles against your back as your fingers grip the fabric of his sweater like you need something to hold onto. “We’ll figure this out together, alright? No pressure. No rush.”

The emotion building in your chest was too much. All you could offer was a slight nod against him. Rafe presses a kiss against your hair, keeping it there momentarily.

“All you need to know is that this is your house, and I’m yours. Okay?” 

“Okay,” you whisper shakily. 

“Well,” he hums as he draws back slightly, meeting your eyes. “We can still do a few things we had planned,” he murmurs, his voice warm and gentle.

“We had plans?” You ask, hopefully. 

Rafe nods as his hands run down your arms, lacing his fingers in yours before walking backward, pulling you toward the kitchen. “It’s Valentine’s Day, princess. Of course, we have plans.”

Princess… Rafe sees the way you react to it–your lips part slightly in a bashful smile, that same flicker in your eyes you had the first time he called you that. “You like that, huh?” He teases. 

You giggle and bite your lip, finding yourself having to look away before looking back at the beautiful man before you–the man who wanted nothing more than for you to remember that he belonged to you. 

Rafe pulls out a stool at the kitchen island, draping your shoulders in a cozy blanket before passing you a glass of water.

“Water?” You pout teasingly as he places the bottle of red wine on the counter back on the wine rack. He shakes his head and laughs before heading back toward you. 

“You heard what he said, pretty,” he hums as he rests his hands on the counter, leaning in closer, making your heart race. 

“You’re really taking care of me,” you smile.

“Of course I am. Not to brag or anything, but that’s kinda what I do,” he hums. “I mean, you said it yourself, sweetheart. I’m the best boyfriend ever. I'm smartest, funniest, and sexiest, for sure,” he chuckles and winks.

“Anything else?” You smile. 

“Mmm… Mhmm,” he mumbles. “You’ve never loved a man before me. In fact, no men existed before me,” Rafe smiles devilishly.

You roll your eyes and smile. “Whatever you say.” 

Rafe reaches under the counter, grabs a pot and a pan, and sets them on top. 

“Wait—do you cook?”

Rafe bursts out laughing, looking back at you like there’s a story there. “Hell no… But you do,” he adds with a grin. “And it’s so fuckin’ good.”

“Yeah?” You smile; your love for cooking’s seared in your memory, but his reaction to your cooking’s brand new. 

Rafe nods enthusiastically. “Baby, you have no idea. Your pasta? Life-changing. Your chicken parm? I swear–”

You smile against the rim of your water glass before taking a sip, listening to him rant and rave. “So,” he says playfully, “since I clearly have no skills in the kitchen, you’re gonna walk me through it.”

Your eyebrow lifts in amusement as a smile curls on your lips. “You want me to teach you how to cook?”

“Mhmm… And don’t worry, I’ll do all the actual work. You just sit there and be your gorgeous, sexy, bossy self, yeah?”

“Bossy?” You laugh as you put your hand under your chin, leaning into the counter. “I boss you around?” 

Rafe smiles boyishly as he looks down at the ingredients list before him. “Don’t worry, princess, I love it,” he mumbles, his words sending a rush of warmth through your body. 

“I don’t remember what I was gonna make.” 

“It’s the chicken thing I like,” he answers as he sets the ingredients on the counter. “You made it for me on our first date. You said it was your specialty–”

“Chicken Cordon Bleu,” you answer with a smile. 

“Mhmm,” he hums with a cheeky grin. “I mentioned that I had it before in college, and I didn’t know that it was something that didn’t come wrapped in plastic and put in the microwave, and you called me disgusting.” 

Your hand covers your smile, not at all surprised with yourself. “I’m sorry–”

“Don’t be,” he chuckles as he sets the last ingredient on the counter. “You looked just like you did right now when you said it, so I was more focused on that,” he smiles, looking back at you in adoration. 

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah, baby,” he smiles. Rafe pulls out the last ingredient before looking at you, waiting for instructions. 

“Alright, first, you need to start the oven.” 

“Start. The. Oven,” he repeats your words slowly as he walks across the kitchen to the appliance. He puts his hands on his hips, looking at the little buttons and knobs before leaning in. He presses the start button, and the oven quickly responds with a shrill beep, making him tense up. “Shit,” he chuckles. “I made it mad.” 

“Temperature first, baby,” you smile. Rafe looks over his shoulder slightly before looking back at you with a smile, wondering if he heard you right. 

“Push ‘start’ again?” He asks, purposefully getting the instruction wrong, hoping you’ll repeat it.

“Temperature first, baby,” you smile, seeing how much your words affect him. 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

Rafe walks back toward you, his beautiful eyes focused on yours. As he worked, Rafe kept talking, filling the kitchen with stories, little pieces of you.

“We went to Italy?” He says. “About two months ago… It was the best trip ever. You dragged me through every little café, every hole-in-the-wall restaurant. We ate so much pasta, holy shit. That bottle of wine I put away was from that trip–delicious, baby. So damn good,” he hums as he recalls the memory himself.

The smell of the food fills the kitchen, and that familiar aroma surrounds you. “And those?” You ask, gesturing to the counter at a small, white box with a bow. 

“Perugina. Also from Italy. I’ve been savin’ them for Valentine’s Day,” he smiles as he cleans off the messy counter with a rag. 

You untie the chocolate box ribbon, picking one up, popping it into her mouth. Rafe scoffs, scrunching his nose as his eyebrows pinch together. “Hey, you’re not gonna be hungry for my five-star meal.”

You roll your eyes and laugh, reaching into the box to grab one for Rafe before holding it to his lips. He hesitates momentarily, his soft eyes flickering between you and the chocolate before taking it between his lips. Your finger grazes the slight stubble on his jaw, your thumb dragging ever so slightly on his plump bottom lip, making his heart stumble.

“Good?” You ask, your voice laced with sensuality. 

“So good,” he hums. Rafe grabs one himself, holding it up to your mouth. You take it between your lips, wrapping them around his fingers, lingering momentarily. The energy in the room shifts from light teasing to something deeper, which you could imagine would typically end with his lips on yours. The tension between you builds, and you feel a flutter in your stomach. 

“Good?” He asks. 

“Delicious.” 

Rafe set the plates on the dining table, resting yours in front of you before taking a seat.

He looks at you out of the corner of his eye, nervously awaiting your reaction. “This is amazing…” You praise, watching as the tension in his shoulders fall. “So,” You say between bites, “tell me about you.”

Rafe smiles, tilting his head as he looks back at you. “What do you wanna know?”

“Anything. I feel like I should know everything, but…” You exhale, pressing your lips together before shaking her head. 

“Hey, we’ve got nothing’ but time, aight? First date convo. The basics. What do you wanna know, princess?” 

You nod in agreement, looking back at him as you think about what you want to ask first. “What do you do? For work?”

Rafe’s lips twitch, a bit of pride slipping into his expression. “I’m closin’ a huge deal soon. It’s been in the works for months.”

“Oh?” You ask, intrigued. “Business guy?”

“Commercial real estate, yeah.” 

Your lips draw to the side as you push a glazed carrot around your plate, trying to think of something else. “And what do I do?”

Rafe scoots a little closer and smiles, resting his forearms on the table as he looks back at you proudly. “You own a restaurant.” 

“I do?” You ask happily. 

“Mhmm… For about two years now, I believe. A very, very successful one,” he praises you as you look back at him in wonder. 

“Wow… What kind of restaurant?”

“Upscale New American Cuisine,” Rafe answered quickly. “And I still don’t know what that means. But, it’s one of the most well-known spots in Charleston.”

Your lips part slightly, a flicker of something crossing your mind. “The Social?”

Rafe’s breath catches, his heart skipping a beat. “Yeah, baby,” he answers gently. 

“I’ve been thinking about that for years–since I graduated…”

“And you pulled it off,” Rafe adds.

Rafe watches you carefully, letting you sit with that realization for a moment, “That’s where we met.”

“Tell me about it.” 

Rafe smiles and nods as he takes your hand in his. “Alright, princess… Umm. You were pissed at me.”

You burst out laughing again, just like you did before. Your hand covers your mouth, half-covering your smile. “Why?” You chuckle weakly. “There’s no way.”

“I swear. You didn’t know me yet, but you hated me that first night, for a while at least.”

“Why?” You ask, scrunching your nose in disbelief with yourself, especially considering how sweet he’s treating you now. It’s hard to think of another moment when you could be pissed at him, let alone hate him.

“Because I was late for my reservation,” he admits. “Like twenty… thirty minutes, maybe? I came in with a party of twelve, and you were slammed. You had given the tables away, and I shuffled in with all those people, totally expecting the table to be ready.” 

“Uh oh,” you chuckle. 

“Uh oh, is right… You told me to fuck off.” 

“No!” You gasp. 

“I’m just fuckin’ with you,” he laughs. “Nah. You told me, very professionally, that you gave my tables away and that if I wanted to eat, I would have to wait.” 

“And what did you say?” You ask as you lean in a little more. 

“I turned on the charm, obviously,” he answers smugly. “Charmed your panties right off you.” 

“Oh my god,” you laugh, feeling your cheeks heat up.

“Mhmm… Flirted with you shamelessly,” Rafe adds. “I told you no one has ever looked this good kickin’ me out of a restaurant. And somehow, magically, ten minutes later, you had a table for twelve in the back.” 

You smile and nod, looking back at Rafe as his eyes twinkle in the candlelight, looking back at you lovingly. “Everyone left, and I decided to stay for a drink, and before I could even look around for you, the prettiest woman I have ever seen in my life sat next to me. And, the rest is history.” 

⊹ 💌 ⁺ ˳ ✿ . ♥️ ࿐

Without hesitation, you curl up beside him, resting your head in his lap. Rafe takes a slow, steady breath, trying to control his emotions.

The movie plays softly in the background, but neither of you is paying attention, focusing more on each other.

Rafe tests the waters, leaning down, pressing a gentle kiss on your forehead like he’s wanted to all night. The moment he pulls back, his eyes meet yours. And unlike before, when he kissed you in the street, the fear was gone. 

You swallow hard, blinking up at him, your voice barely above a whisper. 

“I love you.”

Rafe looks down at you, and just like before, he’s unsure what he heard you or if it’s just some sweet dream. “Yeah?” He asks weakly.

You nod; your eyes never leaving his. “I don’t—I don’t remember everything,” you admit, her voice thick with emotion. “But I feel it, Rafe. I feel you.”

Rafe’s jaw tightens as he struggles to keep himself from falling apart completely.

“I know how much you love me,” you continue, reaching up to cup his cheek. “I can see it in how you look at me and how you’ve taken care of me all night. I’m so lucky to have you.”

Rafe’s vision blurs, but he doesn’t care, letting his tears roll down his cheeks. He turns his face into your palm, kissing the inside of her wrist before whispering, “You have no idea how much I love you, princess.” He wraps his big arms around you, pulling you in for a tight hug. He buries himself in your neck, feeling a wave of relief crash over him. 

When Rafe lowers you again, you shift before he can react, straddling him and wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders. The sudden movement widens his eyes; a surprised chuckle leaves his lips as his large hand instinctively rests on your hips. 

“Well, this is unexpected,” he teases, his voice low and laced with affection. 

You smile softly, scratching your fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck before you lean in, letting your lips ghost over the top of yours. Rafe’s breathing matches yours, lips brushing ever so slightly. And, just when he can’t take anymore, he leans in, pressing a deep, lingering kiss on your lips. 

His breath catches in his muscular chest, his grip tightening on your body as you melt into his warm embrace. Rafe’s heart pounds at the way you kiss him–no hesitation, no caution, fully. Just like the first night, you were together. 

“Is this too much?” He asks gently between kisses.

“No,” you whisper. “Not at all.” Your hands rest on his stomach, drifting higher up the cozy material of his sweater, pressing against his chest, then pressing again.

You still, pulling back slightly as you meet Rafe’s eyes, his brows furrow in confusion until he realized what he had done.

Your hand rests over your mouth, your eyes wide as you beg the silent question. 

Is that what I think it is?

Rafe freezes, his heart hammering in his chest as he gives you a slight nod. “Can I see it?” You whisper. 

He exhales slowly, his lips twitching into a nervous and excited smile. “I can never say ‘no’ to you, princess.” 

“Okay,” you answer as your eyes shimmer with tears.

Then, in one swift motion, Rafe lifts you to your feet, standing there before dropping to one knee, pulling out the box you felt in his breast pocket. 

“I’m askin’ you again. But, if I’m showing you, I’m still gonna do this right,” he whispers, his voice low and thick with love.

Tears well in both of your eyes as you stare at each other, caught in a moment that’s bigger than all of the lost memories.

Rafe swallows hard, staring up at you from his knee with the engagement ring resting in the open box in his palm.

His heart pounded so fiercely he could feel it in his throat, his hands trembling slightly—not out of fear, but because this moment, you had always been the most important thing in his life.

He takes a deep breath, steadying himself before speaking. “Sweetheart, I know things are complicated right now. And if I’m being honest, yeah—a part of me is sad that you don’t remember all the beautiful memories we’ve made. Because, God, baby, there are so many,” his voice breaks as he pushes out the last few words.

“If I’m bein’ completely honest, I would have proposed to you the first night I met you.” A soft, choked laugh escapes him, and he tilts his head, looking at you with the same love he always has.

“The second you rolled those pretty little eyes at me at your restaurant, I knew you were it for me.” You lift your arm, wiping your eyes along the sleeve of your sweater.

Rafe’s expression softens, even more, his free hand reaching for yours. He rubs his thumb over her knuckles and smiles.

“I love you,” he murmurs, looking up at you like you’re the only thing in the world. “I’ve loved you through every version of us—through every moment, every fight, every laugh. And I’ll love you through this,” Rafe promises. “I’ll love you while we figure it all out, while we rebuild every memory you lost, while you fall for me again—which, by the way, is inevitable because I’m incredibly charming.”

Your cheeks burn from your smile, and your eyes shut slightly, causing the tears to tumble down your cheeks.

“So, what do you say, princess? Will you marry me?”

“Yes,” you whisper without hesitation. Rafe barely lets you finish before he slips the ring onto your finger, his hands shaking slightly.

The second it’s in place, he surges to his feet, cupping your face in his hands as he kisses you deep and desperate, filled with so much love it nearly steals your breath.

“I love you,” you whisper as your fingers trace the back of his neck. 

Rafe grins, pulling you back in again, whispering a breathless ‘I love you too’.

Just like before, you move on instinct, jumping into his strong arms, wrapping your legs around his trim waist as your body presses against Rafe’s, kissing him just like you have countless times before. And even if you couldn't remember all those beautiful moments just yet, your body knew him.

Rafe’s big hands grip your thighs, holding you tight. "We should go to bed,” you whisper through a soft smile. 

Rafe chuckles, still breathless, his lips grazing your cheek. "You need to relax, princess."

"I am relaxed,” you murmur, nuzzling against your fiancé’s neck. "Please, baby. You said you can never say ‘no’ to me…”

He groans softly at your words, tightening his hold on you as he searches for your face. 

"Okay," he whispered, voice thick and hungry. "But I'm takin’ care of you… Princess treatment. You're not doin’ shit but cummin’, alright?” He asks. 

You nod, fingers threading through his hair. "I want you."

His chest ached at how you said it, like even though your memories were still scattered, you knew he was the one person who would always be there.

Rafe carries you toward the bedroom, your lips meeting again and again, slow and deep, each kiss stealing a little more of the space between you. 

He works off his sweater and shirt between kisses, and you undo his belt and slacks. Your hands fall down his toned skin as your breathing grows heavier, smiling against his lips.

Rafe follows your focus, your emerald-cut diamond glistening in the low light. “I’m gonna take care of you, alright. Now… Always. Okay?” He asks. 

“I know you will,” you whisper, making him smile against your lips. 

Rafe carefully takes off your sweater, quickly raising his hands to caress your curves. He smiles as he takes in the red lace. 

“This is new,” he whispers as his thumb brushes against the delicate material, making your nipple press against the fabric, whimpering at the subtle down.

Rafe reaches down, hooking his finger under the band of your leggings, looking up at you, silently asking for consent. You look at him and smile, giving him a slight nod. He pulls them down to your feet, kissing higher and higher. 

“These are new, too,” he hums as he slips his finger under the band of your matching panties. The set is no doubt purchased for the man standing in front of you.

He reaches behind your back, kissing your shoulder as he unclasps your bra, letting it fall off your shoulders onto the floor. Rafe lifts you off your feet, and you find yourself in his arms yet again; this time, it’s skin on skin. 

He sets you on the bed carefully, taking his time, looking at you underneath him. Rafe works slowly, biting the band of your red panties and pulling them down your thighs. 

You can feel the chill of your wetness between your thighs as he breathes warmly against your sex. Reaching down, you rest your slight fingers on your clit as he watches, rubbing for a moment, teasing him, making him chuckle out a deep, dark laugh. 

“No touching, princess,” he hums as he grabs your left hand, taking your middle and ring fingers into his mouth, sucking them clean up to the jewelry. 

Goosebumps spread across your skin as he kisses your inner thighs, working closer and closer ‘til he’s kissing your clit.

You throw your head back into the pillow, thighs drawing in. Rafe grabs your knees, carefully spreading you wide, spitting on your pussy before sucking down, sliding two fingers into your soaked hole.

“So fucking wet,” he moans against your cunt, working you with his mouth just like you love, sucking, flicking, and kissing, leaving you crying out for more. 

You feel yourself just seconds away from your release, but he already knows, quickening his pace, sucking down just a little more until your body comes undone. Your fingers twist in his hair, pulling him close as you pulse around his thick digits. 

You relax around him, dissolving into the mattress as he continues to work his fingers in and out, watching your body continue to respond to his touch. 

“How was that, princess?” Rafe asks with a smile, already knowing his answer. His long fingers are a mess with your climax.

You grab his wrist, drawing his fingers between your mouth, wrapping your lips around them, gliding them in and out like you’d suck him off.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he moans, watching you close. “We gotta get you feelin’ better. You’re so good at that…” 

“Come here,” you smile, wrapping your hand around his neck and leading him to your lips. You look at the space between you, watching his thick cock, leaving a slight streak of precum on your stomach as he moves closer. “Fuck, baby,” you moan needily.

Rafe wraps his fist around his dick, tapping your clit, making your body jolt with sensitivity. 

“Are you okay, baby?” He mumbles against your lips. “You wanna keep goin’?” Rafe asks as he traces his swollen tip around your soaked hole, pressing himself against it. 

“Please,” you whisper against his lips. “I need you, please–” And just like when he was sliding on your ring, he could barely wait until you got the rest of the words out, filling your tight cunt like he was always meant to be there. 

He lets out a deep groan, feeling the way your body pulls him in—the way the shape of you fits exactly how it should. “You feel that? Pussy was made for me, baby,” he breathes as he draws out, thrusting himself back in.

Rafe rolls his body into you, reaching that perfect spot inside you. Your body tightens around him, fingers twisting into the sheets.

You reach up, grabbing his cheeks, pressing a deep kiss against his lips; Rafe, swallowing your moans and pleasured cries.

Your back arches into him–nipples brushing against his chest. His chain falls on your chest, sticking to your sweat-glistened skin, making the tears pooling on your waterline fall as you see your initials etched in gold. 

“I love you, Rafe… I love you,” you whisper as he picks up the pace. 

“I love you more,” he soothes as he reaches up, rubbing the tears away with his thumbs. “Come on, baby. Cum on my cock.” 

You bite your lip and nod, looking up at him as your climax comes hard and fast, your body pulsing with pleasure around his thick dick as he works you through your orgasm. 

“Fuckkk,” he moans, drawing out the word as he empties himself inside you, his eyes screwing shut as you purposefully clench around him, making his body shudder.

He collapses on top of you, lips finding your forehead as he kisses, lingering as he catches his breath. Rafe moves a little lower, nuzzling his face against you, his voice barely above a breath as he whispers, “I love you.”

⊹ 💌 ⁺ ˳ ✿ . ♥️ ࿐

tags: @rafesthroatbaby | @marleymarleymarleymarley | @chelzaa | @rafesheaven | @nemesyaaa | @starkeysbabygirl | @littlelamy | @cameronsprincess | @lottalove4evelyn | @yasmin-oviedo | @vanessa-rafesgirl | @watchmerora | @rafeslovergirly | @buckybarnessweetheart | @anamiad00msday | @namelesslosers | @cades-outsider | @romaescapes | @starkeysprincess | @lish-0 | @oxpogues4lifexo | @unrealmirrorball | @lilithblackkk | @sleepiibunniiii | @gri959 | @rafesgiirl | @daryldixon83 | @akobx | @hyperfixationgirl | @lhhlver | @rrafeswhore | @slut-4-gojo | @blair-bears-blog | @loveesiren | @rafescorpsebride | @rafegf-real | @alphabetically-deranged | @ariana2saucyy | @rafestoothbrush | @hauntedfawnn | @laniirackssss | @wtfdudesblog | @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account | @jkrafe | @alejstarkey | @rafe-cameronswife | @rafedaddy01 | @st8rkey

[jugheadtheredhead]

now that this is making its rounds again, it’s even more important than ever to foster and grow this hope. im a young queer woman living in the united states rn, do you think that i do not see horrors? i live in a red state. i wake up everyday with crippling fear, but do you know what keeps me going?

hope. that is what keeps me going.

hope doesn’t look like me blindly optimistic about everything and the fact that people think that that is what this post means breaks my heart. hope is knowing things are bad and wanting to change that. so many people have spread hate on this post and missed the point that both op and i were trying to make, hope is so much stronger than fear. every revolution started with hope. every rebellion. every movement. and that is what i say in my original post.

because the world and humanity at its core is beautiful. people can be beautiful. if we work together to take down the people who want us to be scared, who want us to give up, we can build the world that this post is about.

and listen: they take away our rights, they censor our media, they send away our friends, they rob us blind, and you’re really gonna let them take away your hope too? that is exactly what they want. don’t become complacent, don’t say “oh well things are just terrible and that’s life”, because you can make a change.

hope is not ignorance. i am not ignorant. hope is diving into the abyss scared as shit but the only way out is through and there is always, always a light at the end of the tunnel.

i have seen the abyss too. have sat in the abyss. have let it consume me. i will not let the darkness win, i will not live in the abyss forever. why choose darkness and nihilism when you can choose light and be the change you want to see?

In the future, children will think our ways are strange. "Why do old people always grow so much milkweed in their gardens?" they'll say. "Why do old people always write down when the first bees and butterflies show up? Why do old people hate lawn grass so much? Why do old people like to sit outside and watch bees?"

We will try to explain to them that when we were young, most people's yards were almost entirely short grass with barely any flowers at all, and it was so commonplace to spray poisons to kill insects and weeds that it was feared monarch butterflies and American bumblebees would soon go extinct. We will show them pictures of sidewalks, shops, and houses surrounded by empty grass without any flowers or vegetables and they will stare at them like we stared at pictures of grimy children working in coal mines

[puttersmile]

Heart & Sol Month Days 9 & 22

Prompts: Shared Secrets and Under the Stars

A short story comes with this one!

A Lonely Kind of Cheer

The town square glowed with twinkling lights, festive garlands draped across every storefront. Snowflakes drifted lazily from the sky, settling on the cobblestone streets like tiny, frozen stars. It was the kind of picture-perfect winter evening that should have felt magical.

But for Dogday, it felt heavy.

He leaned against a lamppost near the bakery, watching the towns-critters bustle past, their arms full of wrapped gifts and baskets of sweets. Everywhere he turned, someone was laughing, smiling, embracing the season. And every time someone waved at him—called his name—he waved back, flashing that effortless grin of his.

Just keep smiling. They expect you to be happy.

The thought sat sourly in his chest.

It hadn’t always been like this.

In the past he had thrown himself into the holiday rush—helping neighbors hang their lights, hauling trees into living rooms, carrying more bags of flour and sugar into the bakery than Bobby could count. If he kept moving, kept helping, kept making himself useful, maybe he’d find the warmth of the season that everyone else seemed to feel so easily.

But this year was different.

The cold months were a drain. The long, sunless days left him exhausted before he even got out of bed. The thought of lifting another box, decorating another tree, or forcing another grin made his limbs feel like they were weighed down with rocks.

The exhaustion was deeper this time. And worse—this year, he didn’t have the energy to ignore it.

“Dogday!”

He turned at the sound of Bobby’s voice, and for a split second, his exhaustion faded. There she was, bundled in her favorite holiday sweater, a tray of steaming pastries balanced effortlessly in her hands. She looked as warm and bright as the holiday itself.

“There you are! I was hoping I’d run into you.” She beamed, offering him one of the treats. “Fresh out of the oven! Tell me that doesn’t make you feel at least a little festiiiive!"

He took the pastry automatically, but his stomach twisted at the forced cheer in her voice.

It was too much.

Her eyes were too bright. Her voice too eager. And the way she moved—it was as if she was trying to keep pace with the world around her, not allowing a single moment of stillness.

Dogday had known Bobby long enough to recognize when something was off. And right now, beneath all that sparkle, he could see it—something strained.

Something painfully familiar.

“You ever sit down this time of year?” Dogday asked, keeping his voice light.

Bobby huffed a laugh. “Not if I can help it. Too much to do! So many cookies to bake, decorations to fix, last-minute gifts to wrap—”

“Sounds exhausting,” he cut in.

She hesitated for a fraction of a second—so quick that anyone else might have missed it. But Dogday didn’t.

Then she laughed again, waving him off. “I like being busy.”

That was truth but with a hidden lie. He knew it.

But what was he supposed to do? Call her out? Tell her he knew exactly what she was doing because he did the same thing?

Because he used to overcompensate, too—rushing to help every critter with their Christmas plans, throwing himself into the holiday chaos just so he wouldn’t have to sit with the weight pressing against his chest?

Because if he didn’t, people would see what was underneath—and that scared him more than anything?

The thought made him feel sick.

Instead, he took a bite of the pastry, chewing slowly. Strawberry, it was delicious. Of course it was.

“You know,” he said carefully, “you don’t have to do all of this.”

Bobby’s smile faltered, just a little.

“Oh, I know,” she said quickly. “But I like doing it. Really. Makes everything feel…” She trailed off, gaze flickering away. “I dunno. Full.”

Dogday exhaled softly, feeling that sourness rumble in his chest.

“Hey…Bobby,” he said softly. "I want to tell you something. A-a secret."

She looked at him then, her usual confidence cracking just enough for him to see something raw underneath.

For the first time all season, she wasn’t grinning.

And for the first time all season, Dogday didn’t force a smile either.

“I hate Christmas,” he admitted.

The words hung between them, suspended in the cold night air. Bobby’s eyes widened, and for a long moment, she didn’t say anything.

Then, very quietly, she whispered, “I hate being alone.”

Dogday’s breath hitched.

The weight of the season didn't lift. But it had shifted.

They had spent so long pretending, so long trying to convince the world (and themselves) ñthat they were fine—that Christmas didn’t hurt.

But now, standing here, facing each other, there was no more pretending.

“…Guess we’re a mess, huh?” Dogday said, voice thick. Despite himself, there was still a smile.

Bobby let out a breathy, teary laugh. “Yeah.”

Then, before he could react, she reached out and hugged him. A real hug—not the usual playful, squeeze-the-air-out-of-you kind she usually gave. This one was different. It was slow. Careful. Steady.

Dogday hesitated only a second before he hugged her back.

For once, neither of them had to fake anything.

They didn’t have to act.

Maybe they weren’t as alone in this as they thought.

End.

Headcanon: Dogday gets winter depression.

And its likely "canon" Bobby has bad seperation anxiety.

I did use shipping tags but I think a moment like this would happen before they are a couple.

[slimybeth69]

Touch: Part 10

Previous Chapter | Series Masterlist

Din Djarin x f!reader (no physical descriptions, no use of y/n)

Explicit: angst, dark humor, smut, some talks of violence.

warnings/tags: protective!din, mentions of throwing up, unprotected P in V, painful/uncomfortable sex.

Chapter Summary: Part 2 of the Mines of Mandalore

a/n: this is when I start taking VERY creative liberties- so, I hope you stay having fun. if you read this on ao3 no kinda did, but not really. it's unbeta'ed, poorly proofread and written excitedly. I LOVE YOU ALL FOR STICKING WITH ME.

Previously- You’re plummeting back down to the bottom and you connect with a muted thud. It’s not as soft and sandy as you remember. You look down and instead of white gray sand it’s–scales? You look around as you empty the last of the bad air out of your lungs. You look directly into one giant yellow eye. It’s so close you can see your reflection in it. The eye itself is bigger than you are. You have no idea what you’re seeing. Horns? It’s a hallucination. Something your brain came up with to try and comfort you while you die, surely this isn’t real. The eye blinks at you twice. Din lays beside you, still unmoving as your body instinctively takes a breath in. Water fills your lungs and everything is suddenly warm and quiet.

It’s so bright. And it’s wet. Everything is wet, including inside of you.

All of the water ejects from your lungs and your belly as you sit up. You heave twice and throw up copious amounts of water. It’s being hacked from your lungs as you roll onto your stomach. You choke again, gasping for air, sucking more water back into your body. You hoist yourself up onto your hands and knees and choke it out of you. The skin on your face feels like it’s being ripped away from your skull as you throw up again and continue to cough. Your shoulder is still on fire, hurts worse now than it did before you got into the water. 

“Maker.” Din whispers from beside you. “I thought you died!” Din sounds like he was upset with you. “You wouldn’t breathe! You wouldn’t move! I tried for so long to resuscitate you!” Din’s yelling at you. Really yelling. “What were you thinking going in after me like that?” More yelling. 

You don’t even know what’s going on right now. Why is everything wet? What is he even yelling at you for? You sink back down onto your belly directly into your own wet expulsion– doesn’t matter, you’re dead. Din’s yelling and everything is wet. Definitely dead and this is definitely hell. 

“I’m talking to you!” Din rasps from his modulator. “You could have died!” You roll over onto your back and frown at him. 

“Am I not dead now?” You ask, very seriously. “I definitely died on that giant monster in the water.” You try to roll onto your side, take a nap because you are…exhausted. You didn’t know being dead would be so tiring. Fuck, you need a nap.

“What?” Din asks, not yelling anymore. “What— where?” 

“Big yellow-eyed monster. Horns.” You sigh sleepily. You wonder if dreams in hell are as good as they were when you were alive. Din’s kneeling beside you now, his hand on your bad shoulder. It jolts you into a sitting position and you're pushing yourself away from his touch with your feet. “Don’t! It hurts so bad.” You groan and hold your arm in your other hand. “I’m dead! Why does everything hurt!?” You shout at him angrily. 

“You’re not dead!” He shouts back at you. 

The tears just come from nowhere. Either you're overjoyed…scared…upset. Unable to believe you’re not really dead? Who knows, the tears are coming though. Din doesn’t care about your tears right now though. 

“You saw what in the water?” Din asks, taking a crawling step towards you. His helmet is dripping with water and you can see yourself in his reflection and you’re also a wet soaking mess in the worst sense. 

“It was a monster! It was big and had horns and yellow eyes and it saved us! It had to be the monster because Grogu left us to die in the livin– Those are not living waters! Those waters are dead or dying or I don’t know but the living waters sounded beautiful and that is fucking terrifying!” You’re sobbing, pointing to the water with your good hand. 

“A mythosaur?” Din’s head flicks between you and the water multiple times. “You saw a mythosaur?” 

“What the fuck is that?” You groan. Everything in you hurts so badly. Even your hair hurts. All of it. Everything. “Did you bathe? Did you do the thing with the transgressions? Are you no longer exiled? Can we please go back to the ship!?” You try to stand up but you lose your balance and end up back on your butt. Din walks over and helps you to your feet and steadies you carefully. 

“Are you saying that a mythosaur…saved us?” Din’s helmet is staring at you. You stare back at it, cradling your elbow in your hand because it makes your shoulder hurt less. 

“If I knew what a mythosaur was I could tell you.” You snap back but then hiss in pain as your shoulder throbs and now your back. What the fuck happened to your back?

The ship is warm and inviting when the three of you crawl back into it. You drop to your knees as the ramp shuts and you start to sob again. You were able to keep it together the entire walk back from the living waters. Din and you didn’t say much, he just held on to your waist and helped you limp back to the surface. The tears and the gasps flow freely as your hands touch the cool metal of the ship's interior. Din’s kneeling beside you, his hand rubs you back gently. 

“Do you still want to go to Bo-Katans?

“She could have died down there!” Bo-Katan yells at Din from outside the room you're in. “I warned you that something like that would happen and now look at her! Bruised, almost broken! And what happened to her face? Did you do that to her?” She’s shouting and hissing at him like you herself are Bo-Katans wife. It makes you feel good that she cares about your wellbeing but why does she care so much? 

“Are you really asking me that?” Din doesn’t sound impressed or amused with her. “She saw a myhtos-” 

Bo-Katan comes into the room, stops in the doorway and stares at you. 

“You saw a mythosaur? Impossible.” 

Din and Bo-Katan sit around the bed you’re laying in and they listen carefully as you explain the plan you made with Grogu to go save Din. The explanation about the creature you saw was hard though because you didn’t think it was real. It looked like something out of a scary story your aunt would tell you as you grew out of being a scared child and into an interested young adult. 

“It had a giant yellow eye. Bigger than me– Me and Din together! It was that big. And it had horns coming out of it’s mouth I think. And it was scaly. We were right on it. I think it moved us up to the surface because I watched Grogu float right back up to the surface. I watched him go. How else did we get back up there, Din?” You can tell that they don’t believe you. Bo-Katan gets up and leaves the room. You and Din look at each other for a moment. 

“Are you okay?” Din asks quietly. It’s hard not to turn your nose up at him right now. For multiple reasons. 

“Fine.” You grumble and touch at the new sling Bo-Katan’s medic droids put on your right arm. Din doesn’t say anything else and neither do you. You’re frustrated. He yelled at you, really yelled at you for almost dying.

Bo-Katan returns with a book in her hand, it’s already open to the page she needs to show you. She doesn’t even have to say anything before you’re pointing to a picture on one of the pages she has open to you. 

“This. This is what I saw down there.” You tap the picture a couple times with your finger. “This is it.” You look at Din who is also trying to see what Bo-Katan is showing you. 

“It's a mythosaur.” She says to Din as she snaps the book closed. “Were you too indisposed to see it for yourself?” She asks Din snappily. 

“I was unconscious .” Din says it like he might be embarrassed that he lost consciousness. Bo-Katan turns back to you with a smile, a real one. 

“At least we get to have that slumber party. You’ll be stuck here for at least the night. Medics order. ” She snaps her head back to Din. “I’ll let you rest now and we’ll have a good time later. Drink. Eat.” She says making her eyes wide with the last two words. 

Yes. Yes. You haven’t had a drink since the night you left Canto Bight and you would love one right now, actually. Several. 

Bo-Katan leaves the room. Now it’s just you and Din again. Quiet. Like before. Way before. Before he ever even touched you, kind of quiet. 

“I’m sorry I shouted at you.” Din says suddenly. You weren’t expecting that. “I…” Din trails off and now you look up to him instead of the strap around your shoulder. “Seeing you like that. Dead. I didn’t like it. Hated it.” Din slides his chair closer to your bed. “I don’t want to see you like that ever again. It scared me.” He places his hand in yours gingerly. 

“I’m sorry-” Din stops you.

“Don’t be sorry. For any of it. I wouldn’t be here without you and I’m so thankful for you. I just don’t want to lose you. Lose you, because of me.” Din shakes his helmet. You don’t really know what to say. You think in your heart you want to tell him that you love him and would have died for him if he needed you too. But that makes you sound…dumb, right? You don’t know. You were happy to lay down and die on the mythosaur when you took in all that water. You never even panicked. 

Din holds your hand in his for a long time and you two are just quiet. It’s not a bad quiet. Almost a reflection, kind of quiet.

“I don’t want…” You swallow hard and Din’s helmet snaps up to you. “I don't want you to start leaving me on the ship again. Even after all of that… I still would rather be with you out there,” You point out the window of your room to the stars. “-then be stuck on that ship waiting for you to come home to me.” Din shakes his head and squeezes your hand gently. 

“I can’t protect you when I’m too worried-” You furrow your eyebrows and pull your hand away, despite the pain in your shoulder. 

“You didn’t need to protect me” You growled at him. “I protected you!” Now you’re shouting. “ I saved you from that cyborg bug. I rescued you when you sunk down into the bottom of that wet hell. I saved you. ” You chew at the inside of your lip and you can feel your nostrils flare in anger. “Both times.” 

Din stares in your direction for a long time. He’s probably working on some argument that’s going to keep you locked up on that ship but you won’t do it. Nope.

“You’re right.” 

“Huh?” You look at Din with your upper lip curled. Din nods his head at you.

“You’re right. You did save me. Twice. I don’t need to worry about you. Having you around would be beneficial to me, actually.” Din tilts his head up like he’s thinking about the future and what you two could do together and eventually Grogu, when he stops being scared and will actually help. Okay. Flew a little too close to the sun there, didn’t you? Because now you’re his bodyguard?! What!? 

“I want drink. More drink. I want a lot of drinks.” You look out of the door Bo-Katan walked out of. “Can you tell her I need a drink–I want a drink. I would like a drink please. Please.” You look back to Din. “Do you drink? Can you get drunk?” 

“I could. I can. It’s hard with the helmet.” You nod in understanding, can’t drink in public or with your friends. 

“Right, who wants to get drunk alone?” You sigh at him. “I would. Right now.” You look back at the door. “Can I go do that? Please?” Din chuckles. 

“Bo-Katan was right. You need to rest.” Din squeezes your hand again and leans back in his chair. “We both should.” 

 “This is so good.” You slur softly at the blue glowing drink in your hand. “Better than the ones I would get on Canto Bight.” Bo-Katan smiles at you sweetly. She’s so damn pretty. You hate her for it but not really. She’s just so nice and so pretty and her armor is so shiny. 

“What did you used to do on Canto Bight?” She asks, leaning back against her throne. You’re both sitting on the floor in front of it. 

“I was a waitress mostly. Talked to tables. Wore a dumb little outfit.” You wave your hand up and down your body lazily. “I would tend to the machines sometimes if they needed credit refills or to be emptied. I hated that job though. Being a waitress wasn’t too bad. At least I made tips then.” You sip your drink slowly. 

Din was here… you think but he’s not here anymore. You and Bo-Katan have been talking for hours, drinking and her servant droids just kept bringing in the best snacks you’ve ever had. Different kinds of meats and cheeses and fruits. 

“Have you ever had Mandalorian Wine?” Bo-Katan asks as the droid hands her a glass bottle. You shake your head and she hands you the bottle. “Try, it’s from before the purge.” She explains as you take it in your hands. 

“You lived on Mandalore? You saw it before…” You trail off as you pull the top off the bottle. You look around for a glass but Bo-Katan motions for you to just drink it out of the bottle, so you do. It’s delicious. Not too sweet but not too dry like some wine you’ve had. 

“It was beautiful there before. My family ruled that tomb you walked through today to the mines.” She explains while you sip on the wine slowly. Nothing hurts anymore. You feel all good throughout your body. 

“You're royalty?” You’re amazed. “I guess that explains the castle, huh?” Bo-Katan smiles and then laughs with you. She has a nice laugh. 

“You’re from Cantonica then?” She asks as her laughter subsides. You sip the bottle of wine but don’t answer immediately. You take another sip while you think. 

“I don’t really know," you shrug. “I grew up with my aunt. My mom died when I was really little. I didn’t know my dad. My mom didn’t live in Canto Bight though. I got taken there by a nanny droid after my mom died.” You explain it quickly, it’s not something you normally talk about. You and Din don’t really speak about the past. Never have. It was fine with you. 

“So you don’t know where you're from? Where was your aunt from?” She asks like you haven't thought about it before. You laugh at the simple missed communication. 

“Kethra wasn’t my real aunt. She was just an old friend of my moms. She didn’t know where my mom came from. I stopped asking after a while.” Bo-Katan looks at you with sad eyes. 

“I’m sorry. It’s got to be hard not knowing.” She reaches and places a soft hand on your knee. It’s so comforting that it brings tears to your eyes. Or it's the wine. One of those two things makes your eyes water. 

“It’s not hard. I don’t really care. No one ever really asks so I don’t usually talk about it much.” You say quickly, the lump forms in your throat. “Sorry, think the wine got to me.” You wipe your eyes as Bo-Katan squeezes you gently. 

“You can cry if you want. It’s good to cry sometimes.” 

So you do. And Bo-Katan hugs you the entire time. You weep about how alone you felt in the Jedi temple and how you were so cold to Din when he got back and how you still feel so guilty about it. You sob when you tell her how scared you were when you thought you were going to lose Din forever. Then you laugh through your tears when you tell her about how comforting it was to think you were dying next to him. 

Bo-Katan looks at you as she pulls away. 

“You love him.” She looks disappointed. “Din’s a good man, but he’s devoted to his clan. The Children of the Watch.” She’s angry now, not at you but at Din, you can tell. “You’re devoted to him, and he’s devoted to his clan. Just be careful. I don’t want to see you get hurt anymore than you already are.” She sighs. You don’t say anything, you pull a Mando special and just stare at her. “Don’t take it the wrong way. He cares for you deeply –I would even say he loves you too– but he loves the creed and his clan more. Din would die protecting you, as you would him, apparently. You’re safe with him, yes. But his first priority will al–”

Din clears his throat from the doorway. 

“This is why you wanted a slumber party so badly, Bo-Katan?” Din’s rasp echoes in the large room you two are in. 

“Get over yourself. I’m looking out for my friend. It’s not like anything I said wasn’t true, Din Djarin.” Bo-Katan calls out to him. She turns back to you and gives you a small kiss on your good cheek. “Just remember. Remember where Kalevala is too, if you ever need a friend.” She stands and holds her hand out to you. 

“So, what did Bo-Katan Kryze say was my first priority, if not you?” Din rasps as you walk back to the ship. It was late and you were going to stay the night but… apparently not after that. So, you’re hobbling back to the ship beside Din. 

“You creed. Your clan.” You don’t look up at him. You don’t want to see what his helmet is doing. 

R5 bleeps happily at you. The last time he saw you, you were sobbing on the floor of the ship, almost broken. You touch the top of his head softly as you walk past him.

“Let me show you how devoted to you I am.” Din takes your good hand and leads you into the sleeping quarters. Din takes the blankets off the floor and puts them onto your bed. 

“It’s too small for the both of us.” You whine quietly. Din presses his helmet to the top of your head. 

“You need a bed. Not the floor. Your back and shoulder.” Din tries to sit you down in bed but you’re a little drunk and being stubborn. You hmph softly and close your eyes. 

Din sighs loudly and you open your eyes and he’s throwing all the blankets and the mat on to the floor. He throws his blankets and his mat on the floor next to yours. 

“Stubborn. Perfect. Broken and beautiful.” Din rasps as you hobble over to the makeshift bed on the floor. He helps you down and carefully removes your pants and gets you tucked in.. 

“Touch me.” You whisper softly into the dark after he returns from closing the sun shields and putting Grogu to bed, putting R5 into sleep mode. 

“You’re so hurt.” Din sighs unmodulated as he rubs his hand along your thigh. 

“How ever it doesn't hurt me. I need it.” Your eyes are already closed and you have your good hand in his hair, twirling the curls gently in your fingers. 

Din spreads your thighs with his hands gently and crawls between your legs. He lays on his stomach and brings his mouth to you carefully. The warm breath he lets out against your pussy sends a painful shiver through you. You don’t care, after the day you had you needed him. You need some sort of release and you need Din to give it to you. You did save his life after all. He kisses your slit gently before pushing his tongue inside your folds. He wraps his mouth around you and slowly swirls his tongue around you in those lazy meaningless spins. His arms wrap underneath your legs and he rubs the tops of your thighs with his fingertips gently. 

“Din.” You breathe out as your fingers continue to twirl around in his hair. “Yes.” Din laps at you lazily, just making you feel good, making every bad pain go away with his tongue. You try rocking your hips against his mouth but it makes you whimper in pain when shooting stabbing pain rips up your spine. You settle your hips and just let Din work on you. 

Din’s hands grip the top of your thighs and he spreads you open a little more, listening for any sounds of discomfort before he continues. Now, Din leans forward and puts a little more pressure against your clit with his tongue. He flicks the muscle against your nub fast, you can hear it in the darkness of your bedroom. Your hand grips his hair tighter as he pulls you against his mouth as he pushes forward against you. 

“Fuck.” You moan softly, tugging gently on his hair as he tightens his mouth around your clit and starts to suck gently. “ Yes.” It’s exactly what you wanted. Your words make him work a little faster, suck a little harder. His hands stay gripping your thighs as he licks your soaking cunt. 

“So wet.” Din pants before returning to your middle. His flat tongue drags along your opening and back up to your clit before he wraps his mouth around you again and moves in those tight circles you love but slow. All of his attention is focused right on your clit but he’s moving so leisurely. 

“Please.” It’s begging, it comes out throaty and desperate as he’s compelled to grant to your plea, he quickens his pace. “I need it so bad.” You groan as that warm feeling inside of you starts to grow. “Yes, please don’t stop.” Din had no plans to. He wanted to make you feel good for what you did for him today, you can tell in the way he’s about to make you come. He can tell he’s about to make you come the way you're panting and pulling his hair. 

Din pushes into you a little harder and his hands grip your thighs tighter as he spins fast, tight circles around your clit. You want to lift your hips to his mouth so bad, push back against his tongue. You try again and it’s still stabbing pain, you groan but the pleasure is building. It’s like Din can feel your frustration in your pussy and so he starts to moan against you and those vibrations from his mouth are what send you over the edge.

All the pain, all the sad wash away— even if it’s only for a couple moments it's amazing. The bliss washes over you and now the stabbing pain in your back doesn’t matter for forty seconds. Din keeps licking you, keeps swirling around you as you praise him breathlessly for what he just did to you. 

“Yes. Din. Yes…  You’re amazing.” You’re panting as you let your hips carefully find the mat underneath you. “You’re really amazing.” You pant again. You are waiting for him to come and kiss you but he stays between your legs, licking and slurping the orgasm out of you noisily. 

“Can I do it again?” Din asks from between your legs in the dark but you’re already half asleep.

“Mhm.” You mumble with your eyes closed. Din starts to sit up but you stop him. “No, do it. I want you to do it while I sleep.” You murmur, Din hesitates, like doesn’t know if he can trust you in your sleepiness but you reach for him in the dark with your good arm. You brush up against his stomach. “Do it.” You whisper as your fingers drag down his thousand-degree skin. “Please.” 

You’re asleep when Din’s mouth finds you again. He licks you slowly and carefully, not wanting to wake you. You do only wake up again on the verge of another orgasm. Din’s fingers move against your clit while his tongue pushes inside of your entrance. You wiggle your hips against his fingers and mouth as you come softly half asleep. No words come out of you, just breathless sleepy sounds of pleasure. 

Din takes his place beside you. He rests his head on your chest and wraps your good arm around his shoulders before he settles down into you. 

You’re asleep or you think you could be asleep when he’s planting kisses along your collarbone. He’s whispering but you can’t hear him… or can’t understand him.

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum. Kyr'am Kelir kis'wa mhi. Pal'vut ratiin.” 

Din’s whispering in Mando’a. The words beside ratiin mean nothing to you. You know ratiin means always but you’re also still dreaming so you go back to dreaming about Din speaking Mando’a to you. 

Din was awake and was whispering to you in the dark in his native language and he was professing his love to you. 

“I love you. Death will part us. Mine forever.”  

You fall asleep thinking it was all a dream.

“I have to tell you something. You’re not going to like it.” Din rasps to you as soon as you open your eyes. Your shoulder is aching and your back is as stiff as the beskar on Din’s groin plate. “I’m sorry for upsetting you. In advance.” You groan and attempt to roll over but it’s your bad shoulder side and you can’t. So you just stare into the galaxy in the windows above you. 

“It’s too early.” You groan. Every single fiber inside of you is being torn apart right now. “How do you do this all the time? I cannot move. Not even a little.” You try to turn your head to look at him. 

“I don’t normally get slammed against rocks with no armor on,” Din says flatly. You could punch his helmet. “You should have broken your back with a hit like that.” You do turn your head as much as you can to him and stare. Blinking. 

“It’s not broken?” You’re one hundred percent sure it is. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. He shakes his helmet. “You’re sure?” He nods. 

“You had a scan done at Bo-Katans,” Din starts to explain but you widen your eyes. 

“When did we go to Bo-Katans?” You ask Din very seriously. He tilts his helmet at you.

“I should not have let you sleep so long. You have a concussion.” Din rasps and now you’re trying to sit up and everything is telling you to lay back down but you can’t. You have to sit. Din is helping you up with your good arm. You whine softly as you sit on your ass. That’s broken too. Sure is. Everything is. 

“I’ve been asleep for like an hour or two.” You stretch your one good limb which is your non-dominant arm. Wonderful. Feels brand new. Never seen a day of battle in its life, apparently. 

“More like seventeen hours. I’ve been trying to wake you and this is the first time you actually opened your eyes. In seventeen hours.” You blink at Din. You haven’t been sleeping that long. What? “I had to go back and help Bo-Katan. She was attacked by TIE bombers shortly after you fell asleep.” 

“Is Bo-Katan alright?” You’re worried for your best friend. She was so nice the last time you saw her a couple of days ago when she told Din where the mines were. Or apparently seventeen hours ago. You don’t really remember. Everything is blurry. Really the last thing you remember is dying on a monster down in the living waters. There sure was something fucking living in there. You knew it! Called it a while ago and you did jump in, just not for the reason you thought you would have. 

Din nods and holds on to your good shoulder. His helmet, the way it's cocked to the side slightly, looks worried about you. His rasp snaps you out of a trance you're in, looking at yourself in the face visor. You have more cuts now. Ones you don’t even remember getting. One on the bridge of your nose and now a small one just under your right eye. Now you’re cut on both sides of your face. You also have a bruise on your forehead. You do remember that. Din gave you that one by accident.

“She’s alright. She’s following us right now on her ship.” 

“Where is Grogu?” You ask as he stands to leave the room. Din says nothing and just opens the door to your room slowly, only a crack. 

“Remember what I said? You have to be nice to her. Hey!” Din snaps his fingers at the crack in the door. “And be very careful with her.” Din nods down at the crack before he slowly starts to open it. You can hear the child garbling. “Okay. Be gent–” Din can’t even get the words out before Gorgu is through the door and clinging to your waist. That hurts too. It doesn’t matter, you’re so happy he’s safe and that he missed you. Din returns with rations and the biggest canteen of water you’ve personally ever seen. 

As appreciative as you are, you’re so thirsty. You show him how you would need two hands to lift that thing. He sighs and with one hand he lifts it easily and carries it out of the room and returns with a much more manageable sized canteen and you eat every ration crumb.

“Okay. Bad news," Din says, sitting down on the floor next to you. 

“Lay it on me, I’ll probably forget anyway.” You shake the crumbs out of the packet of crackers into your mouth. 

“We have to go see my clan,” Din explains. You sigh. Not the angry scary helmeted woman again. She was not as nice as Bo-Katan was to you. She didn’t even acknowledge you. Din didn’t introduce you but whatever, same difference. She wasn’t very nice. She basically yelled at Din. “You’re going to have to talk to The Armorer.” 

“Which one is that?” You raise an eyebrow, afraid of the answer. 

“The one who I spoke to last time we were here.” His helmet is looking right at you. You groan loudly and sigh. 

“She’s the scariest one!” You groan again. “Okay. What do I have to tell her?”

“What the planet looked like. That you were my witness to redemption.” Your jaw hits the floor. Why do you have to tell her about any of that? She’s probably not even going to believe some pipsqueak like you. Din pushes your jaw closed with his fingers. “It’ll be okay.” 

“When do we have to do that?” You ask curiously. 

“Right now.” 

Din lands the ship while you attempt to get dressed the best you can. You need his help to fasten your pants and your robe but you did everything else by yourself. Even though it hurt. The ramp of the ship drops down and Bo-Katan is standing at the bottom of the ramp with her helmet on. She looks so nice. It’s all so shiny and pretty just like her, Maker, you might want to be Bo-Katan. 

“I’m glad you’re doing alright.” She rasps down to you through her voice modulator. “I hope I didn’t upset you with our talk that night.” Din is so many paces ahead of you he can’t hear. 

“I don’t remember that night, honestly. Din says I have a concussion.” You smile up at her innocently. She nods and touches your back and tells you everything she said that night. In your concussed state, it makes you sad. You think it would have made you sad even if you weren’t concussed. 

“Come no further.” A new unfamiliar voice rasps out from behind the modulator of a man who is bigger than Din Djarin himself. This Mandalorian is standing in front of the mouth of a cave as more Mandalorians appear from within as Bo-Katan helps you up to where Din is standing. “You are an apostate, Din Djarin.”

“No longer.” Din rasps. “I have been to the mines of Mandalore.” Uh, hello, so have you. You went all the way down. To the very fucking bottom and planted your feet right into the wet sand. 

“Impossible. The mines were collapsed in the purge.” The bigger man crosses his arms across his chest and shakes his helmet from side to side slowly. 

“No. They’re still there. Way far down.” You say from behind Din. Every single helmet including Din’s and Bo-Katan’s turns to look at you. You give everyone a small wave. 

“I saw them. I was there too.” You smile happily. Something… is wrong with you. The medic droids at Bo-Katan’s obviously did not scan you because if they had, they would have seen that your brain fell right the fuck out onto that bug-robot’s sandy floor. Is probably still there right now. 

“The planet is cursed, dala.” The man speaks a word of mando’a to you but you don’t know that word. What the fuck did he just say to you? You reach with your left hand for the lightsaber on your waistband and every single Mandalorian there pulls a weapon and points it at you. Din holds his hands up and steps between you two. 

“Dala is a woman,” Bo-Katan whispers into your ear through the modulator and now everything is fine because you are a woman. You remove your hand from your lightsaber and stand as tall as you can but your back hurts so you stay hunched over, just a little. 

“They speak the truth. Both of them.” Bo-Katan speaks up, trying to diffuse the situation. 

“And who are you, Night Owl.” The bigger man asks, arms crossing over his chest again now that he knows you aren’t a threat with Din between the two of you. He does peer over Din’s shoulder at you twice though. You stare at him each time. 

Your brain is broken. Bro-ken. Why are you looking at that man that way? 

“I am Bo-Katan. Of Clan Kryze.” She steps forward, away from your side and next to Din. You’re now blocked away from everyone. Hidden. You hate it and move your way to Din’s other side and now, you are closer to the bigger man. He takes a step to the side, closer to Bo-Katan. 

“You are both apostates. Your House has fallen from The Way.” The bigger man shakes his head from side to side at her slowly. He better back away from your best friend, seriously. He’s getting too close to her and you are itching to use your lightsaber. You got a taste of it and now you’re hungry for more. 

Okay, calm down. You’re angry. Angry about what Bo-Katan re-informed your broken brain of. Now, here you are standing in front of a Clan that made him an apostate, just for looking at his son. So devoted to them. It made you mad… and jealous. 

“I have proof.” Din holds out a little silver tube. Did he get that while you were dead on the rubble of the mines before or after he tried so long to resuscitate you? Hmph. Din looks down at you. Did you make that sound out loud? You didn’t mean to. 

The clan led the five of you, everyone came along. Grogu and R5 too, further into the belly of the cave. It’s a long walk like before and you’re tired. You could honestly lay right down in the sand and sleep for another seventeen hours. Finally, they lead you through the room you were in before and even further into the cave. 

Finally, a place to sit. You sigh as you sit before everyone else. No one else ever sits beside The Armorer. Her helmet is faced right in your seated direction. You’ve known helmets long enough to know that when they’re looking in your direction this long, they are one hundred percent staring at you. Din sighs as you lean back in the chair he’s standing beside. There are enough seats for everyone, you don’t know why everyone is so happy standing. 

“Din Djarin claims to have bathed in the Living Waters.” The bigger man who Din called Paz while you walked, says like Din is lying. You lean back as far in your chair as you can go to look at him angrily. Din is not lying and Paz better shut his mouth before you get your lightsaber out.

“I have proof.” Din holds out the silver metal tube to The Armorer. She takes it in her hand and inspects it carefully. Then Din points to you. “She’s my witness.” You nod your head and smile like you’re proud of yourself. 

“I jumped right in after him when his ass sunk to the bottom.” You nod again and rest your good arm on the back of the chair you’re in. It’s very comfortable. Din places the forehead of his helmet in his hand. While you spoke the woman poured the water from the silver tube into a machine that showed a hologram that you couldn’t understand because it was backward and also in Mando’a. 

“These are the Living Waters.” The Armorer sounds a little dismayed. “He speaks the truth. Din Djarin you are redeemed.” Then she looks at you and cocks her head to the side. “And who are you, honorable dala?” The Armorer sounds so sweet now. What is it with the Mandalorians and their scary raspy voices? They all are just a bunch of softies under those helmets really. 

“She’s a burcyan.” Din speaks a word of Mando’a to The Armorer. Bo-Katan and The Armorer herself snap their helmets up to Din's helmet in shock almost. 

“A friend .” The Armorer repeats his words back to you so you can understand. “And where is your helmet?” Your jaw drops and Din places his forehead back into his hand. You think you hear Bo-Katan chuckling. 

“I’m not Mandalorian.” You gape up at the helmeted woman in front of you. “I don’t have a helmet.” The woman looks back to Din and tilts her head. 

“You didn’t bring her here to swear into the clan?” 

Your jaw actually breaks your sternum; it drops so far down from the rest of your face. 

“What!? I could do that right now?” You exclaim. Bo-Katan is laughing beside you now and Din is actually walking out of the room. You turn your head to see where he is going because this is good. Is it not? 

“You bathed in the mines of Mandalore. You could swear the Creed now, in the lake. You could get your own helmet.” You are flabbergasted right now. Where the fuck is Din? Why does he not want to be here for this amazing news? You look at Bo-Katan who is trying to settle her laughter. 

“Why are you laughing and why did Din leave?” You whisper up to her. She leans down and rasps in his ear. 

“Because I warned him of this and he didn’t listen.” She starts to laugh again. That is kind of funny, actually. You don’t really know why but you chuckle. 

“I would love to. But I have a pretty bad concussion right now from saving that guy out there.” You look back to The Armorer. “I think I have to go… ask permission… from my friend.” You blink at her. She motions her hand to the door and you need Bo-Katan’s help getting out of the chair. 

Din isn’t in the big room or the walkway of the cave. He’s back at the entrance, looking into the lake. He doesn’t move or look at you when you stand beside him. 

“Why’d you walk out? Isn’t that good news?” You ask, looking up at his helmet. This was something to be celebrated and he's acting like someone just kicked him in the beskar groin plate. 

“I don’t want you to wear a helmet or swear the Creed into the clan.” Din rasps. Oh. That’s not what you thought he was going to say. It makes your heart hurt a little. 

“Why?” It’s asked simply because how else would you ask? Sob on the ground like a child? No. 

“I don’t want you to. It’ll change you. I like who you are without a helmet. I like to look at you” That’s very bold coming from a man in a fucking helmet. Anger bubbles within you and the words Bo-Katan spoke to you come to your head. Devoted to his clan and his creed. 

You pull the best Mando Spesh you got and say nothing. Absolutely nothing. People start to emerge from the cave after a while and carry about their normal day-to-day routine. You end up going back to the ship because why hang out with a bunch of Mandalorians if you can’t spar with them and they all look at you with their cool helmets and it makes you sad. 

The ship is so quiet with no one else on board. Just you and R5 now. Hanging out. You get sadder. This is your future. Alone with the droid probably. While Din and Grogu and probably Bo-Katan go and do cool Mandalorian things together. You’ll be stuck here, giving R5 an oil bath.

The rumble of Bo-Katan’s ship makes you run to the cockpit to look out the window and she’s leaving. Where is she going? 

“There you are.” A familiar rasp says from behind you. It’s The Armorer. “I wondered where you limped off to.” She sounds like she could be smiling under the helmet. You don’t know. You’re concussed. “Did you talk to your friend?” She asks, sitting down in the co-pilot’s seat as you sit in the big Pilot’s chair. Din’s chair. 

“Yeah. He said I can’t.” You look over at her with a disappointed smile.

She shakes her helmet from side to side as if she is disappointed. “Shame. Bo-Katan told me of all your amazing feats down in those mines. The cyborg. How you saved Din Djarin. It was very brave.” The Armorer’s helmet looks over to you now. “You’d make a good Mandalorian.” She nods her helmet once.

“Someone once told me I’d make a good Jedi if only I had the force in me.” You smile at her innocently because Ahsoka did tell you that, and you don’t know what else to say.

The Armorer chuckles at you. “I heard that you trained with the Jedi. That you have a lightsaber made of beskar .” She sounds intrigued. You hand unhook the saber from your belt and hand it to her to inspect. “It’s beautiful. And your friend got it for you?”

“Why do you keep saying it like that?” You look at her through squinted eyes. “ Friend.” You’d like to know why she keeps saying it like you aren’t actually friends. And why Bo-Katan and her looked at Din when he called you that? It definitely didn’t feel great, knowing that’s what he’s calling to people but she didn’t have to keep saying it like that. 

“It was just an interesting word choice, from what I’ve heard—”

“You keep saying you’re hearing things and I’d just like to know who is telling you this stuff?” The Armorer laughs at you. A real laugh. 

“Small one, do you not think you’re spoken about throughout the galaxy? The human girl who trained with Jedi? Who wields her own saber?” The Armorer continues to inspect your lightsaber in her hands. “Special girl. Din Djarin hid you away for a reason. I must know what it is.” She hands the saber back to you and stands. “The choice isn’t his to make, by the way. Follow me.” 

She leads you further into the cave than you’ve ever been. 

“Where did Bo-Katan go?” You ask while you and Grogu follow behind her. 

“They had things to take care of.” The helmeted woman says simply like you should know. 

“They?” Who the heck is they ? 

“Din Djarin and Paz Vizsla went with Bo-Katan.” She’s not interested in talking about them anymore. 

“This is the forge.” She leads you and Grogu to a large stone circle with blue flames shooting up from around the edge. You pick Grogu up and watch as she begins to forge beskar right in front of you. “This is the heart of Mandalorian culture.” She tilts her helmet to look at you. “Just as we shape the Mandalorian steel, we shape ourselves. We all begin as raw ore… We refine ourselves with trials and adversity. ” She turns her helmet back to the forge. 

You think of all the trials and adversity you’ve faced in your life. A mother who died poor on the streets of Coruscant. An aunt who wasn’t your aunt who kicked you onto the streets of Canto Bight once you were old enough to care for yourself. No father. Sleeping on the streets yourself most nights until you scraped together enough money to rent a room. Then you worked at the casino, barely making enough to get by. Now all these things you were doing would be counted as trials and adversities, right? 

“It is Mandalorian culture for each to donate a small portion to the foundling. It is with these scraps that I forged your next piece of armor.” The Armorer hands Grogu a round flat piece of beskar. “Mandalorian armor will help you grow stronger. You will grow into this roundel as you grow into your station, foundling Grogu.” He holds it in his hands carefully and nods up to the helmeted woman in thanks.

You love that she brought you in here to witness Grogu get his next piece of armor. It makes your heart feel full. You love the child more than you ever thought you could. It was as if he was your own. 

“I forged this for you with my own beskar.” The Armorer says but you don’t bother looking up because you want to see Grogu receive his next piece of armor. She clears her throat after a moment and when you snap your head to her and she is holding out a black beskar helmet.

It looks nothing like Din’s, and you like that. Yours has three small slashes going across the left cheek, just like where your mechnosutures are on your face. The visor, instead of a T across the forehead and down the nose, is just a straight black line across the eyes. You can barely tell it's there. It's just pure black beskar with three silver scratches down the cheek and when you move the helmet from side to side, there is another under the right eye as well, where a new scar will form. It’s so shiny and even has a light on it. You can see it from here like Bo-Katan’s helmet. 

“Why?” You ask her, still not reaching for it because you don’t believe that she’s actually handing it to you. 

“For when you swear the creed.” She says simply. Your heart dies inside because you know you can’t. Din would be mad. So mad if you did that. Do you even care though? Do you really even care what Din Djarin wants? “Take it.” 

Your hands touch it for the first time and it almost feels like it might still be warm from the Forge. It's so heavy in your hands. You've never held one, only worn one on your head the one time. The helmet shines in the light again and you can see your reflection in the whole thing. Not just the visor. All of it, it's that shiny. It'll look so good with your freaking lightsaber, holy shit. It's the coolest thing you've ever touched besides the fucking darksaber. That was unmatched, unparalleled power in your hands. This feels special. It feels good as you hold it.

“It was mine once. I redesigned the outside for you. More fitting.” You look up to her and she’s scratching at her cheek with three fingers and one under her eye.

You can't hide your smirk because that is your least ferocious battle scar, but it works because you’re stuck with them. Maybe you should tell her that. Would she think it was funny? Because it kind of was now, after the fact. Sometimes. Most of the time you're still upset that he scarred you. The bacta therapy did not work as well as you had hoped. 

“I’m so honored.” You sigh disappointedly. “I can’t accept this. I don’t think I can swear the Creed. I care about Din and I don’t want him to be mad at me and possibly lose the gig I got on the ship and everything.” Your concussed brain is just letting it all out.

She shakes her hands at you, motioning for you to keep it anyway, she doesn't want it back. “It’s a gift. From me to you. Creed or not; you are brave, honorable, and loyal." She touches your good shoulder. “Don’t put it on until you leave, small one.” You nod and hold the shiny black metal helmet in your hand excitedly. You turn and see the monster on the wall behind you.

“That’s a mythosaur. I saw one of those down in the Living Waters.” You point to the black skull hanging on the wall. “The one I saw was way bigger.” You sigh and carefully put the helmet under your good arm. 

“You’re lucky to have seen a vision. It’s a very noble one to have.” She keeps her hand on your good shoulder as you two turn to leave. Noble? Vision? She just called you honorable and brave and now she's trying to downplay this amazing thing you saw. Din and Bo-Katan could barely believe it.

“I don’t think it was a vision.” You explain to her that when you slipped off Gogu’s orb and sank back down to the bottom, you didn’t land back on the sand and rubble. You landed on the mythosaur and it returned you and Din to the surface.

“It sounds like a vision, small dala.” She walks with you slowly, keeping with your pace. “The mythosaurs are all gone.” She sounds like she feels bad for you, for seeing things with your dumb, dying brain.

You don't blame her. You thought it was a hallucination until you awoke and started throwing up the Living Waters. You wonder if you should tell her that you ingested some and see if that makes you already sworn into the clan, like if you drink it does that just make you a part of the whole culture? Surprisingly you keep that to yourself. She's still pretty scary even though she was so much nicer this time. You wonder if it has anything to do with the state you're in. Battered and bruised. Partially dislocated and then fully dislocated and then popped back in again. Broken.

“I saw it. I’m telling you,” you turn to look directly into her helmet. “On all the honor and things you said I had back there; I saw it with my own eyes. I laid down and died for a moment on its scales. My hands touched it.” You're not sure if you're doing enough to make her believe what you saw down there.

She stays quiet just like everyone else in a helmet. The Armorer says nothing as she escorts you back to the ship.

Din never even said goodbye? And now you’re on the ship with Grogu and R5 without him. And it’s dark out. You and Grogu eat dinner together quietly and you walk him to his room, cradling him in your good arm. 

“I love you.” You coo the words down to him for the first time since you’ve known him. When you speak it to him it feels like a weight’s been lifted off of him and he sighs softly, nuzzling into your hand as you pet his forehead. He grabs your fingers with his little razor claws and pulls your hand closer and kisses the palm of it softly. It melts your heart. You’re glad you told him. 

The floor bed feels so empty without Din beside you. Exhaustion was threatening to make you fall asleep in the sand earlier and now, you can’t even close your eyes because you don’t know where Din is. The next morning he’s still gone. You lay on the closed up ship most of the day, looking at your new helmet. You thought you’d be more excited when you got one but it doesn’t feel good. It feels sad. Everything does. 

The sound of the ship's ramp opening makes your heart flutter. You can hear Din walking down the hall before you can get off the floor to go meet him. You’re working on pulling yourself to your feet with a little help of the bed next to you when he rushes in to help you up. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye yesterday. A foundling was taken by a raptor.” Din explains while you get to your feet. He presses his helmet to your forehead softly. 

“It’s fine. Is the child alright? Did you get him back?” Din nods at your question and sees the helmet on the ground next to you.

“You didn’t.” His rasp sounds shocked. “And you already took it off?” He sounds mad now. You furrow your eyebrows at him. 

“I didn’t swear the creed, you swamprat.” You shake your head at him from side to side. “It was a gift from The Armorer when I told her my friend wouldn’t let me.” You frown at him now and remember all the reasons you’re upset with him. 

“Bo-Katan told me that you’re devo-” 

“I know what Bo-Katan told you. I overheard that night.” Din rasps and you sigh loudly. You’re becoming more angry with him. “Come on. I have to move the ship. Come with me.” Din grabs your hand before you can protest and leads you into the cockpit. 

“I hope you know that you are… high on my list of priorities.” Din rasps softly after you sit down in the co-pilot’s chair. You grimace, not wanting to think about it. You had almost just forgotten about your anger watching him hold your hand and because you’re still concussed pretty badly.

“We don’t have to talk about it.” You look out the window while you say it. “We really don’t.” Din sighs from under his helmet and looks over at you. 

“I just want you to know that what Bo-Katan said is–” 

“True? I know. I’ve known for a while. You are devoted to your creed and your clan and that’s fine with me. I don’t have anything but you and the child and now R5 to be devoted to, it’s just frustrating to think of it that way. It makes me feel… useless. What good am I if you three aren’t around?” More non-filtered word garbage that falls out of your mouth because you don’t know how to control yourself with this concussion. All the thoughts that would normally just stay thoughts are piling up in your lap as they fall out of your mouth. 

Din is silent. You don’t say anything back either. Bo-Katan used that word devoted. Devoted to his creed, his clan. It hurt you when she said that. Both times you think. You had nothing to be devoted to. Not a religion. Not a clan. Not even a family up until now and you just feel stupid for it. Stupid for being so devoted to a man who isn’t even as devoted to you.

“I like you being devoted to-” Din rasps but you snap your head to him even though it hurts. 

“Of course you do.” You snap. “Who wouldn’t!? You trapped me in the Razor Crest and never let me leave and made me fall in love with you and now, I’d follow you down into the mines of Mand’alor apparently and get my back broken by some giant robot bug.” You sigh and look forward out the window again. “ You like me being devoted to you.” You audibly hmph from next to Din, loud enough for him to hear. He stays quiet for a minute, just looking over at you. 

“Trapped you?” Din sounds confused. “You asked–” 

“I know what I asked for. You still locked me up for ages and wouldn’t let me leave.” You snap at him angrily. “I have no friends! Just Bo-Katan! She’s the only one and I just got her.” You snap angrily. You were missing him so much last night and now, you wish he’d stop rasping out of the modulator and just let you go back to sleep. Din brought it up. You would have forgotten with your concussed brain had he not said anything. You would have sat down in the cockpit all happy and stupid. 

“You love me?” Din asks after a while. You look at him with your eyebrows furrowed.

“Who told you that?” You snip, still angry with him for whatever reason your broken-brain is telling you to be angry. None of that bothered you. Not until Bo-Katan opened her mouth. Din’s helmet turns rapidly side to side like he can’t believe what you just asked him. Like he was looking around the room for a witness that wasn’t there. It was just the two of you in this stupid cockpit.

“You did!?” You raise an eyebrow at his questioned statement. “Just a second ago.” 

“No I didn’t.” You turn your head forward again, looking out the window. Did you? You don’t remember saying that. You just remember… angry. Only the emotion, none of the things you just said. “I did not say that.” You snap. 

“You did too.” Din snaps back at you. “Said it yourself.” He turns his head to look forward as well and then it’s just quiet in the cockpit.

“Didn’t . I’m upset with you–” You go to turn your nose up at him but he cuts you off. 

“You can’t be upset with me. It’s one of the rules, remember?”

You stare at him now, blinking. He must be practicing for his new comedy set at the casino tonight. You do love him. Right now and for a while you have. It makes you sick to your stomach now for some reason. You hate that you love him. 

“I don’t follow the rules.” It comes out quick so he can’t interrupt you and now, you turn your nose up to him and look away. Another hmph comes out of your mouth. 

“You’re a brat.” Din shakes his head and presses a button on the dash for the first time since you guys sat down. You pretend to not be paying attention. “Pretty. But a brat.” You try hard to hold back the smile curling on your lips. Because if you’re a brat, Din made you one. You didn’t expect anything from him besides the credits you earned at the end of the week before you started doing it for free. You were not a brat two years ago when he dropped you off at the temple. Nope. If you were, it got beaten out of you by Ahsoka. 

You stay silent. Mostly because you don’t have a good comeback for him. Also, you don’t want to hear his rasping modulator voice in your ear anymore. Din presses buttons on the dash and checks meters and screens and looks so dumb while he does it. Not really. You’re just still mad, for whatever reason. You need a nap. You’re just grumpy. Or are you really upset? It’s hard to tell your brain feels like it’s covered in a thick layer of Grogu’s mouth slime. Everything feels kind of fuzzy and slow. You feel heavy. Your mouth feels like it has marbles in it most of the time. 

“Are you still upset with me?” Din says after a while. You shrug your one good shoulder but it’s on his side so he can see at least. 

“I don’t even know if I was actually upset with you to begin with. I don’t know what I’m feeling.” You want to say more but you hold back because a new thought just came into your brain but nothing about saying it would be constructive to your relationship with Din or to yourself. “I just thought you’d care about me more one day. And I think I just realized that is not going to happen.” You say it anyway, because of your broken fucking brain. You could die right here, you hope you do, you hope your brain is bleeding out and you don’t have to hear the response from the helmet to that stupid fucking thing you just said.

You stand up slowly from the chair you're in with a groan. Din watches you but says nothing. Of course. It’s good though, you didn’t want him to say anything. Maybe he didn’t hear you. You leave the cockpit in silence and make your way back to your room. You take all the blankets and your mat back to your bed and crawl into it and lay looking up at the sky above whatever planet you're stuck on with the Mandalorians. 

Tears come. Big, hot stupid tears that roll down the side of your face and into your ears. You do your best to keep them from reaching the canals but you only have the one hand, and they’re coming from both eyes so fast. You feel so stupid. A fool for opening your mouth and a fool for even ever having that thought in your head. 

Happily you would go back to Canto Bight if that’s where he wanted to take you. The thoughts of meeting someone and getting married and having children one day is always something you wanted. It obviously got put on the backburner when you decided to take this new job– a traveling job. You thought you’d get a night off every once in a while or you’d get to meet people– to possibly meet and get married to and have a child of your own with one day.

Din DID keep you locked away, starved of touch and attention and now you were mad at him for that. He showed you his face, yes, you know he cares for you but were your feelings for him true and real? You would have died for him, you almost did trying to save him. You don’t know if that constitutes love or insanity. Nothing feels right anymore and your head hurts now, your brain hurts. It’s broken and you’re trying to use it for the first time apparently and it hurts now. 

Grogu babbles from the side of your bed. You let your left arm dangle and he crawls up it. It hurts, he’s using his little claws but you don’t care. You bring him into your side and snuggle into him. 

“And one day you’ll be devoted to the creed and the clan too and it’ll just be me and R5.” You whisper down to him as tears continue their path down into your ear canals. You don’t even try to stop them anymore. This was worse than when Din shoved credits into your chest after the market. You wept that day, all day long you remember it like it was yesterday. You’re sobbing now. You can’t help it. Everything hurts and now you’re sad. Grogu crawls onto your chest and nuzzles into your neck gently. You bring your good hand up to his back and hold him while you cry. 

When you wake up, it’s dark in the ship and Grogu is gone. Din’s not in your bed. The tears are in your eyes before you even open them. The lack of body heat next to you hurts worse than any of the physical pain you feel. You swing your legs out of bed and wrap the blankets back around you the best you can. 

Silently, in the dark you feel your way to the door. It’s dark in the entire ship when the door opens. You sigh and shut it before you turn the light on so you don’t risk taking a peek at Din who is asleep in his bed. You get your orange candy from the cupboard and sit at the table in the dining area. You don’t even really want to eat anything but your mouth is so dry and you need something other than the fuzzy feeling on your tongue. 

You woke up still loving Din. The anger has left you and now you’re just sad. Full of it. It’s consuming you. What does your future with this man hold if he won’t let you swear the creed or join his clan? What does that mean for you?

“Can’t sleep?” Din’s rasp scares you from the hallway that leads to your bedroom.

You shrug your one good shoulder and pop another candy into your mouth.

“Well I can’t sleep.” Din walks to the table and sits down across from you.

It’s hard to avoid looking at his helmet, but you do your best because you don’t know what to say and if you look at him, the words you don’t want to say will start to come out. 

“What are you expecting of me?” Din asks softly from behind the helmet. The response you want to give and the one you actually give are two different things.

“Nothing.” You whisper, you still haven’t looked at him. “Literally, nothing.” You roll a candy in between your fingers slowly. 

“You’re lying.” Din rasps softly. 

“What do you expect from me?” You return the question back to him now. Because you’re not really sure anymore, honestly. You finally look up at his helmet and he’s shaking it from side to side slowly. “Right. Also nothing.” You huff softly and roll your eyes. 

“I expect you to be on the floor when I come to bed. You were not.” This curls the corners of your lips into a smirk when he says it. “I was disappointed… to not sleep on the floor.” You smirk now and Din reaches across the table. “Do you still want to be here? With me? On the floor?” You nod at him. Din is the most lovely man you’ve met and maybe it was just Maker’s plan for you to meet the way you did. “Then let us go sleep on the floor together. Like always and until forever?” It’s a question as Din holds his hands out to yours. 

Din unwraps you from the blanket you’re in after he sets up your mats on the floor alongside each other. His hands guide you down to the floor carefully. 

“Can I make you feel good?” Din’s unmodulated voice in the dark whispers into your ear. 

“Please.” You need to feel his heat against you. You miss it. 

Din places his hips between yours and slides his already erect cock along your slit. He moves so slow that he’s quivering above you. His chest drops down to yours gently and he kisses your lips softer. 

“I love you.” It’s barely a whisper against your mouth. “I’m devoted to you.” Din kisses you again before you can register what he’s just said to you. Din rocks his hips forward inches at a time while his cock nestles harder against your quickly soaking slit. He’s ten-million-degrees like always and it feels so good. He passes his heat along to you as he pulls back, just as slow. You’re kissing Din harder than you’ve ever kissed anyone in your whole life and he’s fighting you for dominance, he wants to kiss you harder, his tongue needs to be further into your mouth. Din is winning, hes’ overtaking you, pushing your head back into your pillow as his tongue swirls around yours. 

The head of his cock drags down into your folds and presses up against your entrance, he hesitates. Din is still kissing you, he’s dropped down to his elbow and has one hand in your hair, holding it so gently as his tongue swirls around yours now lazily that he’s got you pushed back into the pillows, on top of you. Din slips the tip of himself into you and then stops. He pulls away from your kiss reluctantly at the sound of your protest. 

“I love you too.” You whimper up to him as his lips leave yours. “So much.” You wrap your left arm around the back of his neck and snake your fingers up into his hair. “I’m sorry I’m a brat–” Din pushes the rest of himself inside of you and kisses you again before you can finish. He goes back to those slow lazy kisses. He’s timing the swirl of his tongue around yours to his hips thrusting inside of you and something about it has your head spinning as you try and pull him closer into you. It’s impossible, Din is as close to you as he can get, he’s literally inside of you but you arch your back so you can press your chest into his. You don’t care that it hurts, you need to be closer to him, need to be pressed into him as tightly as you can be. 

This wasn’t like the last two times he was inside of you. No, the last times he was inside you it was like the man couldn’t be contained, couldn’t control himself. These were the gentle and patient movements of a man who cares and loves the woman below him. These kisses were unlike anything you’ve ever experienced. You two were just sharing each other's breath while you embraced. 

Din’s hips start to thrust slowly. He’s panting when you pull away from the kisses to moan softly. You’re also panting, all of your air is in Din’s lungs. You’ll share your air with him forever, you don’t care. He can have it. All the puzzle pieces just fell into place when Din said those words you were so desperate to hear. You didn’t even know you needed to hear them so badly. 

“I want you to have my Mandalorian children.” Din whispers to you as he rolls his hips into you gently. “ I want that. Badly. ” The words quiver as they come out of him, like it’s something he’s wanted and now could possibly get, if only you said yes. You push your hips up into his and nod against his forehead, pushing your lips against his. You let out an agreeable moan against his mouth. Everything about how your body reacted to his statement screamed yes. Din felt the yes come out of you silently in his hands and against his chest and in his hips when you pushed back against him. 

Din rocked his hips like that against yours, his head moving from between kissing your neck and shoulder to kissing your lips and jaw. He kisses you everywhere he could reach while still being inside of you. He’d whisper Mando’a into your ear; what he whispered to you the night when you thought you were dreaming. Then he repeated it back to you so you could understand him. 

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum.  Kyr'am Kelir kis'wa mhi.  Pal'vut ratiin. I love you. Death will part us. Mine always.” It’s whispered so softly you think you might be dreaming again and have to pull away to look at Din in the dark even though you cannot see him. “Death is the only thing that could keep me away from you.” He coos down to you through the void. 

“I’d follow you into the afterlife.” You murmur back as his hips start to rock into yours more forcefully. “I’d follow you anywhere. ” Your hand in his hair tightens gently as he presses his face into the crook of your neck. Din’s panting as he tries to hold back. 

“I can’t anymore.” Din groans into your neck like he’s frustrated. His hips start bucking into yours with more force. “It’s too good–too p-perfect.” It’s strained like he’s been holding it in for so long. Everything inside of you is telling to stop but the feeling between your legs is roaring to keep going. It's drowning out all the pain as he drives himself into you now with more speed. “Y-You’re too b-beautiful.” 

You find release in those hard, fast thrust into your aching cunt. You didn’t realize how badly you needed this. Your cunt clenches down onto him as you come and it pulls the most vulgar sound you’ve ever heard out of him. You have to bite your lip at the noise he just made because it made another wave of pleasure wash over you as he drives his hips into yours one last time. 

“Fuuck.” Din growls into your shoulder. “It’s so good.” He’s groaning, and you can feel him coming inside of you, pumping you full of his Mandalorian seed with meaning. “Fuck. I’m going to do that forever.” He declares as he slowly pulls himself from within you. “Are you hungry? I’m starving.” Din sighs down at you in the dark. You’re still reeling from what just happened. 

You and Din just had a whole conversation while you got nailed in the most romantic fashion. Professed your love for one another, and now, he’s asking if you’d like to share a ration? There is so much you want to say. So much you want to talk about. Din’s padded footsteps in the dark, and then the door are the only sounds you hear until he’s back, sitting on the ground next to you handing you a cracker. 

“Eat. You need it.” Din is munching on something in the dark, talking over whatever he’s got in his mouth. 

“I honestly didn’t think you actually ate anything. Ever.” You say into the void as you take the cracker he’s nudging all around your hand trying to find your palm. Din chuckles and you hear him take another bite of whatever it is he's eating. 

“I eat your orange candies while you sleep.” Din chuckles again. You gasp before you can take a bite of the cracker.

“Are you serious?” You ask into the dark and await a response. Din just laughs. “Because I’ve been blaming Grogu. Every day I blame him for it. You’ve listened to me blame him for taking it!” You exclaim. 

“He’s the perfect cover. Can’t talk. Is a child. Loves candy. ” Din admits to you from within the darkness through more chuckles. You gasp again. 

“You really are a big beskar-wearin’ lying sonofabitch!” You are in shock. It’s such an innocent thing to lie about. Grogu never got in trouble, just a ‘really?’ when you hold up the quickly dwindling bag of candy in front of him. “What else do you lie about, Din Djarin?” You leer into the darkness, waiting. It stays quiet for a long time. “Liyin’ Din Djarin should be your name.” You tease. 

Din can’t even stifle his laugh, he tries but it doesn’t work and you too laugh in the darkness together for a couple minutes. It feels good to laugh with Din like this. 

“I’m sorry for the things I said to you. You didn’t trap me. I stayed because I liked being on the ship. I liked my mat.” You’re honest with Din, you did love being on the Crest with him and Grogu and as mean as he was in the start you did miss him when he was gone. You always felt safe when he was around. “You’re very good to me. Keep me safe.” You reach for him in the dark and touch his shin. “I appreciate you very much. I don’t think I tell you that, ever. Thank you.”

Din lets you speak and crunches on what sound like crackers in the dark while you talk to him. “Anything for you.” Din says as he crawls into the sheets beside you. “I'd do anything.”

tag list: @thereaperisabitch @pedrospookie @furiousmushroom @creepycorbeaux @harriedandharassed @realmamabear79 @blahkateisdone @picketniffler @cheekychaos28 @lilac-boo @pedrostories @wandamaximoff4578 @probablyreadinsmut @katw474 @cowboy-like-m3 @gummy-dummy

[obvithe-bestsoph]

No. 27 | "Don't cry, I hate it when you cry." PG6

masterlist requests prompt list (if you request a prompt, please request a player for it as well!) warnings: none.

After yet another long day of work, you walk back through your apartment door and put your bag and coat on the hanger, tiredly wandering into the dining room and rubbing your eyes. You get the fright of your life, your boyfriend sitting at the table with a giant grin. After you calm down from the scare, you laugh slightly.

“Dios mío, Pablo. Some warning would’ve been nice.” He stands up and comes towards you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Lo siento (i’m sorry), I wanted to surprise you.” “Well, you definitely nailed the ‘surprise’ bit.” you chuckle, laying your head on his chest. “I cooked for you. Your favourite.” Your eyebrows raise in surprise. “Really? Why?” “Why not?” he shrugs, “You’re my girlfriend, I love you, I wasn’t busy, and I assumed you would’ve had a long day, so I did something nice.” You smile slightly, “Of course you did. You’re too good to me.” “Just as good as you deserve. Now, sit.” he pulls out your chair for you and more or less forces you down into it.

A plate of (your favourite food) is put in front of you, and you grin up at Pablo. “Gracias, mi alma (thank you, my soul).” “De nada (you’re welcome).” “So how was training today?” you ask, looking at him as you both begin to eat. “Good, I think we’ll play well in the game on Wednesday. Speaking of, are you gonna be able to come?” “I wish, and I hope so, but I’d have to ask my boss to finish an hour early. And when she’s the one approving it, there’s a very small chance it’ll actually happen. But if I can’t be there in person, I’ll be secretly checking the score on my phone under my desk.” you smile weakly, you really are sick of your nightmare of a boss. Pablo frowns. “How come everyone else’s leave always gets approved, but never yours? How come she always gives you more work than everyone else? Does she not like you or something?” You sigh and shrug, “Honestly, your guess is as good as mine. It sure seems like she doesn’t like me, but I have no idea why. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything wrong or made a mistake around her.” Pablo’s frown only grows. “I don’t understand why you even still work there, why can’t you just find another job? Hell, why can’t you just quit? I’ve told you before, I make more money than I know what to do with, it would literally be no problem if you stopped working, let me support you, and moved into my apartment with me.”

“Because I’d feel bad.” “Well, that’s stupid. Why?” “Just because. You don’t need to be paying for all my shit on top of all yours.” Pablo rolls his eyes. “You aren't a particularly expensive person, Y/N. You rarely even let me buy you anything. You insist on paying for your portion of meals and always buy me far too much for Christmas and my birthday, etc.” “Yes, because I’m your girlfriend, not your financial burden.” “Spoiling the love of my life every once and a while is hardly a ‘financial burden.’ You’re being ridiculous.” “I don’t want to argue with you, long story short, the answer is no. It’s just one annoying boss, nothing I can’t handle. And I’m fine with working.” Pablo scoffs and the room is silent for a few moments. “Look, I only suggest it because I love you, okay? I want you to just be able to come to my games, home or away, and not have to know about it 2 weeks before so you can apply for leave, only for it to be denied by that demon of a boss you have. I hate that you’re always exhausted on all our dates because you’ve had a long week, that you fall asleep so early that we never have time to do anything… fun… at night anymore. I just want you to be free and happy. Por favor? Para mi? (please? for me?)”

You look at him for a moment before looking down at your plate again. “I’ll think about it.”

Pablo grinned again, he knew that was more a less an ‘Okay, fine, you win.’

“Gracias. Te amo, mi vida (thanks. i love you, my life).”

Later that night, you guys were cuddled up on your couch, Pablo was watching the movie that was on the TV screen, and you were on your phone. Finally, he looked down. “What are you doing?” he asks curiously. You look up at him and grin. “Sending in my resignation notice.” His eyes go wide and he sits upright, “You’re kidding.” “Nope.” “Oh my god!” he breaks out into yet another grin, pulling you into a proper hug. “Thank you, thank you so much,” he whispers into the skin of your neck. “Why are you thanking me? It should be the other way around, you’re the one who’s basically retiring me early.” you smile, and Pablo chuckles lightly. Eventually, Pablo calms down from his excitement a little and watches over your shoulder as you finish typing out the email. “I can’t believe I’m seriously about to do this.” you say quietly, your finger hovering over the ‘Send’ button. “Neither, but I promise, you won’t regret it.” he presses his lips to the top of your head. A few moments go by, and you still don’t press the button. “Are you gonna send it, or what?” “Pablo, I’m scared,” you whisper, looking up at him, and he can see the worry and uncertainty in your eyes. His expression and tone soften, “Why?” “I don’t know… I just am.” “You don’t have to do this right now, you know?” “I know, but I want to.” “Then send it.” “I can’t.” “Well, that’s kinda stupid.” You thrust the phone into his hand. “You do it.” “You’re sure?” You nod. Pablo hits send, and just like that, you’ve quit your job. You stare at the ‘Sent’ message for a moment before bursting into tears, burying your face into Pablo’s chest. He shushes you gently, rubbing your back and repeatedly kissing the top of your head, before eventually pulling your head away so he can look into your eyes. “Don’t cry, I hate it when you cry. What’s wrong?” he asks gently. “I- I’m just so happy. Thank you, Pablo. Thank you so much for this opportunity.” you sniff, speaking shakily through the tears. “Anything for you, mi niña preciosa (my precious girl).” he murmurs.

“I love you.” “I love you too, más que nada (more than anything).”

[james-spooky]

this is a test

[designernishiki]

kazumaji nation, if the pairing were to be canonized in y8, how do you imagine it happening? either realistically or ideally. go

[no1ryomafan]

The subject of the getter manga spin offs came to my mind randomly today talking to some of my friends and I’ve been thinking about how IIRC the only major spin off manga to not be translated is High, aka the Mahjong one with a all girl team. The only other ones to follow are a manga made for the PS game and the “try to remember” manga that arma’s first 3 ep director made, but those are in a weird territory of spin off classification, at least compared to the others, but I also chalk up their lack of translations being their hard to find, especially because try to remember was considered lost media. (Until my friends randomly found it lol) But I’ve been wondering to myself something regarding that: While High simply could’ve never been translated because finding the proper scans could be hard, I feel another factor people gloss over it compared to the other spin offs is because there’s a absence of the OG getter team.

Because even though I talked about how Go team been not adapted properly in animes and the toei go show was likely overlooked because of that-to manga readers-I also note it is the only Getter show to NOT be fully subbed even though getting the footage doesn’t seem to be a issue. All the other getter manga spin offs feature the OG team in some capacity, most of them are their own tellings of getter so we get adaptations of the team. The only example I can think of that didn’t do this was Hien, but that had Hayato in it. Meanwhile High is a new getter team completely so people seem to turn an eye to it, even though the girl pilot is- very much clearly “Ryoma but gender bent” lol. (And I do know a handful of people who like her but not a TON)

I don’t wanna make bad assumptions about the fandom because it’s just more so how it goes, the first line of protagonist’s will ALWAYS be the most popular with there only ever being a few exceptions to this, but it is kinda a shame Getter falls victim of most of the fandom either liking Ryoma and/or Hayato the most-mainly Ryoma but I met plenty Hayato fans and y’all are insane /pos-and don’t really bother to bat a eye to the other characters which I just feel leads to these things getting neglected. And I’m- guilty of this but I’m trying to talk about the others more.

[narugen]

god i really do hope we get some kikoru level development for mina given how hoshina was able to exceed his output force to 100%?! i really really want that for mina as well but compared to everyone i think she’s the one who’s the most afraid of being on the field

[talesofwhimsy]

Last gasp of winter :(

[kitten4sannie]

sleepover

pairing: perverted bsf! wooyoung x fem! reader feat. a comatose mingi (he’s asleep on the bed lmao…or is he…)

summary: wooyoung is more than willing to hold you when you’re afraid during your horror movie marathon, and even more willing to help distract you like a good friend does.

wc: 1.4k

warnings: perverted dom! wooyoung, subby innocent! reader, bro is convincing and manipulative okay, cnc/dubcon-ish vibes (if that’s not your thing feel free to skip!!), coercion/corruption, exhibitionism (all of the following is done right next to mingi), brief kissing, groping, fingering, initial orgasm denial,, tit play + spit, rough unprotected sex, creampie, this is a wild one idkidkkkkk

a/n: wooyo has been haunting my brain lately so i had no choice but to write this >~< i hope you enjoy <33

song rec: if you think i’m pretty - artemas

“I told you not to put this movie on, Woo. It’s way too scary,” you complained whinily into your best friend’s shoulder, shielding your eyes from the suspenseful scene playing out on the laptop sitting on the edge of your bed.

“Mingi was the one who wanted to watch it, you know,” Wooyoung chided, causally wrapping his arm around your shoulders, rubbing your bare arm up and down in a comforting manner.

“Well, Mingi’s passed out.” Pouting, you pointed to your other friend that was curled up underneath the comforter beside you, his eyes shut. “He’s not even watching, so what’s the point?”

Wooyoung rolled his eyes. “Come on, Y/N. Don’t be a pussy.” His cold fingers made their way down to your waist to squeeze at it, making you jump from the sudden contact. “Oh, I see….Do you think the monster’s gonna get ya?”

“Shut up, Wooyoung!” you whisper-shouted, as to not wake up Mingi. You pushed on his chest, feeling his heart beat quickly against your hand. Was it racing like yours was? And, when did he get so close to you? His hand was already running up and down the bare skin of your thigh, causing your thin shorts to ride up more and more, but you didn’t have the nerve to confront him about it. Your pout grew. “I’m really scared, okay?”

“Oh, you poor baby,” Wooyoung cooed softly into your ear, his words laced with faux pity, his sharpened gaze focused solely on your blushing face. “Do you want me to help you, Y/N? Distract you from the scary movie?”

“Y-yes, please…”

You didn’t know what you were getting into, but you trusted that Wooyoung had your best interest in mind. It was then that he gently coaxed you further into his arms, lying comfortably against him as you faced the laptop screen once again. Goosebumps began to spread across your limbs from underneath the warm comforter, but it wasn’t from the frightening movie — it was from Wooyoung’s hand slipping underneath your shorts, his slender fingers rubbing at your pulsing cunt through your panties.

“W-Wooyoung…” you croaked weakly, your face and body growing so hot, you could pass out. Friends didn’t do this sort of thing, did they?

“Shhhh, baby, just look at the screen…yeah, just like that…” he sighed softly, his warm breath fanning over your neck, now concentrating on the way your tank top clung to your softness of your tits, how your nipples grew hard enough to poke through the thin material, groaning when he found your clit through your panties, rubbing at it in slow, small circles.

“B-but we’re friends, Woo…” You made a sad attempt at pushing his hand away, the moral debate you were having internally slowly fizzling away the longer Wooyoung touched you.

“Isn’t this what friends are for?” Wooyoung persisted, pulling your panties to the side just in time for his fingers to dip in between your soaked folds. “And, fuck, you’re so wet right now, Y/N. It feels good, doesn’t it? What’s so wrong with that, baby?”

“But, nnngh…Mingi’s right next to us…” You began to melt into Wooyoung’s arms and the soft mattress below you, unable to resist spreading your legs out for him, your thigh even resting against Mingi’s, not noticing when it shifted just as two of Wooyoung’s digits slipped inside you.

Licking at his lips, Wooyoung then pressed them onto your cheek, egging you on in a low voice, “Then, tell me to stop, baby.” He began to fuck his fingers into you at a fast pace, your walls clenching around them. “Right now. Say it.” Now, he was relentlessly rubbing his thumb into your clit with his free hand, still working your cunt, hooking his digits against the spot that made you spasm, your body growing warmer and heavier. When you pouted up at him and whined, he simply mirrored your helpless expression. “What’s the matter, baby? Hm?”

“Oh– fuck, right there…” you moaned out, not even attempting to look at the laptop screen in front of you, instead solely focused on your best friend beside you, so desperate to cum, you began to roll your hips down every time his fingers plunged into you.

“Yeah? You’re feeling really good now, aren’t you, Y/N? Now that you’re nice and full? Just look at you, baby…You can’t help but fuck yourself dumb on my fingers, huh?” Wooyoung looked like the monster from the movie now, eyes full of hunger, like he was ready to eat you up.

“Uh-huh, uh-huhhh…” Just as your sounds of pleasure began to crescendo, your mind growing cloudier by the second, pulling at the sheets below you because you were right there, Wooyoung ceased his movement completely, leaving you high and dry. “No, please, don’t stop, please…!”

Wooyoung gave you a look of indifference, much like a cat that suddenly wasn’t interested in playtime anymore. “Show me your tits. Maybe then I’ll make you cum.”

Desperate for your best friend’s attention and touch, you slowly rolled your tank top up until your tits spilled out, tears pricking at your eyes. How did you get here? Why did Wooyoung’s deliciously dark gaze successfully distract you from the paralyzing shame you felt? Or is that what made you wet? The way you were slutting yourself out for your best friend while the other was sleeping right next to you? “Please make me cum, Y-Youngie…”

“Fuck, you’re so cute, come here.” Now, Wooyoung was on top of you, leaving as much of his saliva on your tits as possible, squeezing one when he was noisily sucking on the other, his dilated eyes never leaving your teary ones. “Can I fuck you, Y/N? I’ll make you cum, I promise…I need to be inside you, baby, please, you’re so fucking hot…” Desperate for release, Wooyoung lowered his sweatpants until his heavy cock dropped onto your bare cunt, rubbing himself along it, making your mind grow that much more empty. “Just the tip, okay? That’s okay, yeah?”

Before you knew it, you were nodding, and just like that, he was inside you, your best friend, using you like a cocksleeve. Wooyoung was ramming his cock into your cunt like he was trying to knock you up. “That’s a good slut, fuckkk, taking me so well…” You tried to moan, to speak, to say anything, but you couldn’t, not with the way his tongue suddenly went down your throat.

All you could do was cling onto Wooyoung, your nails digging into his skin when it felt like the tip of his cock was pounding into your cervix, almost growing dizzy. When you heard your best friend groaning about how he was getting ready to fuck you full of his cum, you gasped, unable to talk, short, broken moans being punched out of you each time Wooyoung slammed himself into you, your thighs hooking around his waist once his hot load began to pour into you. It was then that you turned your head just in time to realize Mingi was watching you intently, his plush lips parted just enough to let drool slip past, catching onto the way that something was moving rapidly underneath the comforter somewhere near his abdomen.

“Told you she would put out, didn’t I, Min?” Wooyoung mused smugly, fucking you through the orgasm that tore through your used body, using your bruised hips like handlebars as he did so.

“You were so right, Woo, so, so right,” Mingi sighed out, tossing his head back into the pillow behind him, leaving a few watery cumshots on the inside of your comforter and his hand.

You didn’t know if you wanted to cry or to cum again, instead just trying to catch your breath, hiding your face underneath one of your wrists, at least until Wooyoung pulled it down and made you look at the both of them.

“You’ll let Mingi have a turn, won’t you, Y/N? It’s only fair, right?”

Mingi nodded in agreement, before leaning in, licking across his teeth. “Having my cock inside your little used cunt next will make another good ‘distraction’, don’t you think?”

Even though the credits were rolling on the laptop behind them, the monsters hadn’t left. They were right there in front of you, waiting for your permission to ravage you. You couldn’t help but nod. They were your best friends, after all.

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© kitten4sannie, 2024.

[damiansgoodgirll]

Hiiii!! I hope you’re doing amazing! I’m sorry you’re having a bit of writers block at the moment as I know how difficult that can be!! I saw you opened your requests to see if that would help so I figured I would request something!

Maybe Rhea x Reader, where Reader is also a wrestler and her aesthetic is super girly and cute and bubbly (kinda like Tiffany Stratton) and something about it just draws Rhea in. Like she tried to act like she hates it and doesn’t like Reader, but eventually she just can’t and caves to how adorable Reader is and it brings out Rhea’s sweet side! 🩷

rhea ripley x reader

likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated!

‼️nothing major, rhea’s sexual thoughts tho…a lot of fluff and sweet moments, reader being a tease (let’s pretend rhea is still champion here) ‼️

heartbeat

rhea hated when someone tried to take her title away. but she hated even more when you became her main opponent for a title run.

you and the dark haired woman were completely the opposite. you were a face, she was a heel. you wore pink, she wore black. you were kind and loved backstage, she was a menace with anyone who dared to even look into her eyes.

she hated the idea of having to fight with you. she already handled a liv morgan, a tiffany stratton and now she had to face you.

she absolutely despised having you as her main opponent and no matter how many times she tried to resonate with adam, he said that you deserved that title run more than anyone. and she knew it too. she observed you. you were good, you were smart, you worked more on psychological fights than physical fights and for the first time, rhea was afraid.

you and her never really talked outside of the company. she wasn’t in your group and you weren’t in hers.

so the first time you got to share a few words was when you two had a promo and even if rhea looked so intimidating, you were ready for a challenge and you showed her who you really were.

“so you think you can take my title?” she shouted into the mic, staring at you. she looked for something that could have scared you away but she find nothing.

you simply laughed, taking a few steps forward her “i’m damn sure i can” you stated making the crowd cheer.

she was ready to reply back. she was so ready to put you in place but having you so close to her made her freeze. your vanilla scent intoxicating her. your challenging eyes never leaving her face. something about you made her even more interested into this feud. you made her heart beat fast and she couldn’t understand why.

“cat got your tongue, mami?” you teased her, hearing even more chants from the crowd.

“stay out of my way” she said coldly before dropping the mic to the ground and leaving the ring.

as days passed, rhea moved cautiously around you. observing you at the gym, observing the way your body moved inside the ring as you trained. she couldn’t help the filthy thoughts running in her head when she saw the sweat dripping down your body.

watching you fight other opponents and she hated admitting it but she found you extremely attractive. she never imagined herself being attracted by some barbie doll prototype but here she was.

you, flaunting your pink gear, your perfect make up and curled hair, ready to fight liv morgan - once again.

you knew it was going to be an easy match. you fought liv multiple times and you always won but somehow it didn’t go exactly as you planned. sure, you got your win but liv managed to injury you.

rhea watched all the match behind the scenes and a lump form in her throat.

how the heck did liv manage to injury you? she was supposed to keep you safe inside the ring just like you did with her and instead she fucked up and probably costed you a title run.

she should be happy that you weren’t her opponent any longer but she was actually looking for a chance to fight you.

you struggled walking back, helped by some trainers, they let you sit comfortably in the medical area as a doctor checked upon on you.

sprained ankle.

a couple of weeks of no fighting, no training at the gym and no title run opportunity. this was definitely not what you were expecting.

as you slowly walked back to the locker room, you were stopped by the infamous rhea ripley.

“hey…” she greeted you, making you look at her with a confused expression.

“i’m out of your way now, are you happy?” you sarcastically asked her but you saw how serious she was.

“no, not really…i was really looking forward to fight you, can’t believe im stuck again with that mid morgan girl” she said, clearly mad.

her words made you laugh “it won’t be for too long, give me a month to recover and then i’ll happily pin you down the floor” you teased, seeing her blush.

her strong facade fell when you talked dirty to her. she felt her cheeks burn but she tried to keep up with you “i can’t wait for that moment to come then…”

you were absolutely in for whatever rhea was trying to do with you “challenge accepted then, see you in a month” you winked but as soon as you tried to walk again, a sharp pain rang through your foot, making you flinch a little.

“hey, you okay?” rhea immediately asked when she saw the pain expression in your eyes.

“i have to get used to walk with just one foot” you laughed.

“here, let me help you…” her hand softly moved around your hip, helping you back to the locker room so you could gather your belongings and then go straight to the hotel. she walked slowly, never forcing you or your body.

“i didn’t know rhea was a kind one” you joked, making her laugh.

“i’m not. i never liked you y/n…this bubbly energetic person you are, i always hated it…too much pink, too much kindness” she whispered.

“why is it in the past?”

“because somehow your annoying personality caught my attention” she confessed, making you look at her with a teasing face.

“that’s good to keep in mind next time i’m facing you in the ring…” you said making her roll her eyes.

once you got to the locker room, rhea packed all of your stuff. your make up, your clothes, your perfume - the vanilla perfume - and she took the bag over her shoulder.

“do you need a ride to the hotel?” she offered and you couldn’t turn her offer down so you agreed.

as you were settled in her car, you found her to be a comforting presence. maybe she really wasn’t the mean one everyone talked about.

before you could speak, metal songs blasted through the speakers and it took you a couple of minutes to realise that you and rhea couldn’t be more different “do you really listen to that?” you asked, a little confused.

“yeah…it’s amazing” she happily said as she drove.

“it’s giving me a headache” you complained, making her roll her eyes for the second time that night.

“what do you listen uh? let me guess? taylor swift?” she said almost too annoyed.

“hey! she’s a good artist! and no, i listen other people too! i listen to people who actually make music and not scream into a microphone for three minutes straight” oh you were so in for a tease right now and seeing how she scrunched her nose made you feel like you were hitting the right buttons.

“let’s not start or i’ll drop you here in the middle of the road” she joked, clearly amused by the whole situation. you ended up sitting there and watching her driving fast around town.

she helped you with the bags and only left your hotel room once she made sure that you were okay. she even left you her phone number so you could call her in case something happened - as she said.

a week has passed and you couldn’t even lie to yourself - you were actually enjoying texting rhea and having random conversations in the middle of the night with her. you remember texting her once you got home and asked her if she wanted to come over as you were bored and reluctantly she accepted.

she would be lying to herself but you attracted her. you were like a magnet and she couldn’t get enough of you. she would help you any time you asked her.

randomly going through your tiktok, you heard the bell ringing and without thinking twice, you slowly got up and opened the door, finding an adorable rhea ripley with junk food in one hand and a pink fluffy blanket in the other.

you looked at her for a second, too stunned to speak.

“you letting me in or are we going to stare at each other all day long?” she asked, her usual sarcastic tone lingering with some sneaky jokes too.

“oh sorry, yeah, come in…i wasn’t expecting you with food and a pink blanket…i actually wasn’t expecting you at all” you joked, trying to ease the tension a little bit because you had no idea why was rhea in your living room now.

“i was at the supermarket and i had my day off, i saw the blanket and i thought you would like it…here” she handed you the blanket almost as she was annoyed by it, trying to maintain her dark and mean side but deep down you knew that she was a softie.

you gladly accepted the gift and invited her to sit on the couch with you “what about the food?” you teased her, seeing her rolling her eyes at any remark you made was now a habit.

“i was hungry and i thought you would like some food too…” she tried so hard not to go soft with you but your smile and bubbly personality were making it hard for her.

“rhea ripley thought of me? i feel honoured” you laughed making her giggle.

“shut up and eat while i pick a movie…” she stated as she started swiping movies catalogue on netflix.

she chose something fun, something romantic, knowing that it was your favourite genre of film.

“i’m pretty sure you’re studying me so in two weeks you know how to make me lose against you for the title run” you joked, making her laugh.

“honey, there’s no way you’re gonna beat my ass during that run, that’s my title and my title only but i’ll happily pin you down” she turned her face to you, a sneaky smirk on her face as her mind fantasised about the idea of having to pin you down, under her body.

“you so sure about that ripley?” you tested her “what if i am the one to pin you down?

rhea wouldn’t mind having you over her to be honest. in any other situation she would have let you being in charge but not when there was her title on the line.

“we will see in a couple of weeks” she winked “now watch the movie before i put some freaky horror on” she teased you knowing how much you hated horror movies.

“okay mami” you whispered making her roll her eyes - again. you displayed the pink blanket over your body and over rhea’s body too “before you say anything, it’s cold outside and i don’t wanna hear you complain for the next two hours” but rhea definitely wasn’t going to complain. she never had you so close, your body was like a magnet and was so close to hers that it was enough to keep her warm. your head softly laid over her shoulder and even if you couldn’t see her, you felt her body relax against you.

maybe she was going to pin you in the ring but you knew who was really in charge outside of the company and seeing her so calm and relaxed in your presence made you feel something different about your friendship, as if there was something more but you couldn’t really point it out.

spending the rest of the night in each other’s company, joking and laughing about the smallest things.

as the second movie of the night ended, you really needed to stretch yourself out as you grew a little uncomfortable sitting for almost four hours in the same position. she helped you standing up and you slowly tested the water, instead of putting your hands around her shoulders as you always did, you put them around her waist.

the height difference between you two was pretty obvious but that didn’t stop you to have your way with her “i have a feeling you feel something for me” you teased her watching her in her eyes.

“i don’t know what you are talking about…” she tried so hard to maintain her composure but she was struggling, especially when she had you so close.

“so what if i asked you to kiss me? would you back up?” you always been a tease but this was something else even for you.

“no…” she whispered, her eyes softly looking down at you.

before she could make any move, you kissed her. your lips meeting her soft ones, a smile pressed on her face as you kept kissing her “i’m definitely gonna pin you rhea” you whispered, making her chuckle.

“keep dreaming barbie” as she grew more comfortable, her hand moved behind your back and pressed you against her body “remember, it’s always monday night mami…” her devious look was back as if you helped her gain her confidence back around you.

“you know…i’m always in for a challenge…”

yeah, maybe she was the rhea ripley but you knew how good you were and being able to tease her and make her so flustered around you was definitely a weapon in your sleeve.

“we will see pretty girl…” falling in love with the enemy wasn’t definitely her plan but somehow you managed to make her heart beat faster anytime you were close and now she felt like she couldn’t get enough of you.

————————————-

i’m receiving a few requests and i’m trying to overcome my writer block 🤞🏼🩷 thank you for your patience and kind words 🩷🩷

[yanderenightmare]

TW: nsfw, yandere, toxic relationship, friends with benefits, guns, threats of harm and death, name-calling

gn reader

When you open your heart to your fuck-friend, he sighs with rust.

You still have his cum inside your hole as he tears you a new one—telling you he doesn’t have the fucking time or the fucking energy to deal with lovey-dovey confessions right now—he has enough bullshit on his goddamn plate already without having to consider you and your fucking feelings as well.

If you’re not going to shut up and fuck him, you might as well shut up and fuck off.

So you do. The latter, that is.

Part of you knew it was going to end up this way. You with your heart broken and him with the blood on his hands. But part of you had hoped as well—hoped he felt the same way—hoped your words would soften his edges and wash away all the muck in his head enough to let you in.

You’d read a little too much into those gentle touches he sometimes bestowed upon you in his weaker moments—that soft way he cried when holding onto you during the night, wordless and clingy and begging you not to go.

But the more you think about it, the less you understand why your heart aches. It doesn’t really make much sense after all…

In truth, he’s an asshole. Always been. And you deserve better.

He’s always so angry. Always on something mudding up his blood. Never with anything nice to say. It doesn’t really matter how you’d held him in his nightmares or patched him up when he’d stumbled through your door drunk and bloody. 

Scarred boys in need of fixing aren’t good for your health—especially when all they have to offer you in return are callous words of rejection.

He’d always been secretive. He wasn’t a very good lover—but you're not entirely sure if he was ever even a good man. The wounds he’d dreg to your apartment in the middle of the night always left blood on your sheets. He never agreed to go to the hospital—always insisted your first-aid kit was enough, even when he'd come to you with bullets you’d have to dig out with a pair of tweezers.

You realize he’d been using you. You were convenient and stopped being convenient the minute you wanted more—and upon the realization, you move on.

And then he comes crawling back…

Shivering in the rain like a beaten street mutt—looking starved and sick like one, too. There’s blood on his shirt and a grim darkness in his eyes. He tells you to let him in, and you only barely have the guts to tell him to go away. 

He has this tortured look on his face—as though something’s your fault, as though you’ve wronged him in some way, as though you’re the reason he’s out in the cold with nowhere to go.

Barging in and slamming the door behind him—he locks it and pockets the key—ignoring your questions as you ask him what the fuck’s gotten into him. He looks deranged—water dripping from his matted bangs, eyes reddened, and cheeks streaked. You only now notice it isn't because of the rain.

“You said you wanted me, didn’t you?” he huffs. “Here I am.”

You’re tense. You hadn’t felt like that with him before, it takes you a minute to realize it’s because you’re scared. After all, you’d wanted him all those other times—rough or otherwise. And now you didn’t want him at all. 

“You should leave. You’ve been drinking.”

“What? You changed your mind already?” he accused, then scoffed with a not-so-unamused laugh. “I’m not surprised. People like you, who like danger and bad men, are always so fickle-hearted.” He approaches you too fast for you to back away, his scarred hands curling into your sweater—split skin from recent beatings bleed onto the fabric. “Flighty little slut, you’ve probably already found the next guy who gives you a rush. Isn’t that right?” He’s seething as he pulls you forward, looking like a hostile hound.

You lay your hands on his chest to keep him at a distance—feeling his entire body shake like static beneath your touch. You wonder if he’s taken drugs tonight, but looking into his eyes, you don’t think so. They aren’t fidgety but deadset. Actually, upon closer look, you don’t even think he’s drunk.

But anyway, it doesn’t really matter. You still don’t want him here. “I’m serious. Get out, or I’m calling the police.”

“Oh? Are we slinging threats now?” he jeers, showing no signs of letting go or leaving—he only pulls you in closer, so close you could kiss. “What? Don’t tell me you’re scared now.” He breathes out another short excuse for a laugh as you veer away, putting his lips to your ear instead. “You should have been from the start—but no—grinding up on me at the club as though you’d die without my attention. Crying pretty tears when you saw me all beaten and bruised—acting as though you want to save me. Tch—”

He throws you down on the carpeted floor. You wince from the impact, and when you look up again, you see he has a gun pointed at you.

You stop breathing. A dark sinkhole in your gut seems to want to swallow you from the inside, and you think you might just want it to if it means escaping the threat before you.

“I shouldn't have come here…” he mutters—finger resting on the trigger all too calmy. “But I just couldn’t get your face out of my head. Looking up at me with those doe-eyes, wearing my shirt even though it’s got blood on it after I fuck you silly, saying such sweet little nothings as if I’d paid you to.”

He sighs—heavily—as though he’s expelling spirits. His hand remains holding the gun poised and pointed straight down at you even as the other drags down his face, pulling his maw before sliding through his wet locks, raking them away from his face.

“I gotta kill you, you know?” he says, shoulders slumping with the statement. He sniffs—it's almost soft enough to be a sniffle. “That’s the only way to solve this. That’s the only way to get you out of my fucking head.”

He cocks the safety with a click that makes your life flash before your eyes. Faces of your family and friends, people you haven't seen in years, childhood pets long dead, a job interview, the holiday you felt true happiness, the night you went out dancing and met him.

The tears stream silently down your face, and you still don’t breathe. Every part of you, every nerve and muscle, has gone completely still. Unmoving, unblinking as you stare up through the barrel of the gun and wait for the bullet to come through.

His finger curls tighter around the trigger, and you close your eyes with a furl between your brows. And then…

Nothing. There’s a large exhale.

“I can’t do it…” 

You open your eyes to see the gun lowered. The sight brings a fresh rush of air back to your lungs, making you all but wheeze as it fills you, breathing in far too much and much too quickly. You regain some semblance worth of motoric, too—able to scramble backward until there’s no more room to be gained, sitting with your back against the wall. Eyes peeled at him where he’s taken to crouch, holding his head with his free hand and the one still with the gun in it.

He fists his hair and tugs on it frustratedly, muttering to himself. “Dozens of lives on my hands, and I can't kill this one single-” he stopped short.

This time, when he looks at you, there’s something else in his eyes. No malice or scorn, but something sad—pity almost.

“Well… seems like you got what you wanted...”

The pity’s for you.

“This is what having my heart feels like.”

♡ BNHA – Bakugou, Shoto, Dabi ♡ JJK – Sukuna, Geto, Toji ♡ AOT – Eren ♡ DS – Akaza, Sanemi

♡ FEM x M INSERT masterlist ♡ GN x M INSERT masterlist

[lightseoul]

a/n. inspired by a random ass comment on an instagram reel. thank you user @/agapita5. hope y'all enjoy whatever this is. (0.4k)

“‘m done, kats.”

you call out to the man as you exit your shared walk-in closet, thankful you’re in your frumpy pajamas instead of the flattering yet tight clothes you wore out the entire day.

from where he’s sprawled over his king-sized bed—decked out in lounge clothes that still make him look like a fucking model—you barely catch him as his gaze lifts from his phone to you, although you definitely don’t miss the way a massive smirk creeps onto his face when you emerge in front of him.

and as if that wasn’t enough, he lets out a low whistle. “damn.”

your eyebrows instantly furrow in confusion, and you can’t help but frown at him. “seriously?”

at that, his grin is gone in an instant, your incredulous tone making him frown. “what? i just said damn.”

“i know!” you exclaim, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious in your threadbare shirt. “where was that earlier today when i walked out in that ridiculously suffocating dress?”

“i complimented you, didn’t i?” he retorts without missing a beat, exasperated. “i told you you looked fuckin’ pretty.”

“yeah,” you pout, “but you weren’t exactly amazed just as you were a second ago…”

to your chagrin, bakugou doesn’t say anything for a while, your own eyes stuck to staring at the floor in a weird mix of embarrassment and disappointment. when you finally look up at him a moment later, though, he’s already only a few inches away from you, and you startle.

“shit,” you clutch your heart, “don’t scare me like that.”

that makes him snort. “you’re the one who wasn’t paying attention, dumbass.”

whatever response you were about to spew dies in your throat when he lifts his scarred hand out of nowhere and pulls you closer by the waist. your eyes widen at the sudden gesture, and the same smirk from earlier manages to slither back to his face at the sight of you flustered.

“you really wanna know why?” he whispers after a second, voice low and gruff.

you gulp, fighting back a shudder at the feeling of his breath against your skin. “w-why?”

“it’s because no one gets to see you like this but me, baby.”

˖⁺‧₊ as always, reblogs, replies, and tags are appreciated <3 feel free to drop an ask, too—i'd love to chat with you. have a nice day!

tagging. @bunnysaursushii @yawnzzzzzzzz @cholios @kashee-h @iluv-ace @lotuslovers @elarakive @sugurusmoon @napbatata @k0z3me @h0ngh0ngh0ng @honeyoru @yoongiwithglasses @hellokitty-doll @lilsebnem @tetsuukuroo @crangrapel0ver @syrhra

[call-memissbrightside]

All I can think about is Katsuki dating someone with a baby—

His friends think it’s a bit odd since he’s in his early thirties and could still mess around before settling down but he’s not having it

You’re a bit nervous to tell him that you had a kid after a few dates, and you think he’s never going to hit you up again when he doesn’t really respond when you tell him, he just drops you off at your place with a emotionless look on his face.

You cry to yourself that night as you put your little girl to bed, and the two year old knows something’s wrong because she’s fussy through the whole night routine. You really liked Bakugou, he made you laugh and respect you but if he can’t accept your daughter than it's not going to work out.

Then the next morning he texts you that he got tickets for three to the local aquarium for the day. You call him, confused.

“That way we can take your daughter?” He’s confused by your question. “Why? Is she too little for the aquarium?”

You’re nervous as hell for him meeting Mai for the first time, but Katsuki is taken back at how your daughter looks just like you. She's adorable, and his stomach flipped taking in how you looked so beautiful in your jeans and simple shirt.

"Hi Mai, I'm Katsuki," He kneels down to the four year old's height but he's so big and the little girl immedietly burst into tears and hides behind your legs.

"Oh honey, it's okay," You coo at her, picking her up. Mai isn't convinced and hides away from Katsuki.

"I'm sorry, she'll warm up," You explain, but you weren't too sure. Mai had a shy personality, and was very attatched to you. You just hoped that Bakugou would be patient with her.

Mai started shedding her shy personality once you arrived at the aquarium.

"Mom, fish!" She yelled in excitement, tugging on your hand to get you to walk faster. Katsuki stands back and just watches you interact with your daughter. He knew he liked you, but seeing you be a mom did something to him and he imagined this being his life forever.

"What are you thinking about?" You asked when you noticed Katsuki seemed distracted.

He opens his mouth to answer but Mai interupts him when she squeals, "Mommy penguins!"

Katsuki was closer to her, and the little girl grabs his hand and drags him through to the penguin exhibit. Bakugou is taken aback, but quickly pushes back his fear of scaring her and kneels down to look at the penguins swimming as Mai squeals in excitement. She can’t pronounce his name correctly, so Mai just addresses him as ‘Suki which warms his heart.

It’s like a switch got flipped and Mai wouldn’t let go of Katsuki’s hand for the remainder of the tour through the aquarium. You stand back, smiling and snapping pictures, just watching as Bakugou showed a much softer side to him.

The day ended with Katsuki buying Mai the biggest stuffed penguin the aquarium store had, and the little girl could barely hold onto it as she fell asleep in her stroller.

“You didn’t have to get her that,” You said, feeling overwhelmed by his gesture.

Bakugou feels a string of anxiety pull in his stomach, wondering now if his actions were seemed as inappropriate.

“I-,” He tries to be truthful, “I’m sorry, I should’ve asked. Mai just seemed so happy and I wanted to get her something to remember me by.”

That melts your heart, and you kiss him on the cheek. “Thank you for being so sweet to my baby.”

Katsuki is blushing so hard, his ears are ringing as he helps you by packing down the stroller and putting it in the trunk while you tuck Mai into her car seat. The little girl was out, but still hugging her penguin.

Katsuki keeps the radio low as to not wake Mai as he drives you two home, holding your hand and already planning the next outing.

[reidrum]

glory of the snow

note: the return of insecure!reader my beloved <3 i had a bunch of requests to bring her back so i hope we like it! this is really just a gentle reminder from spencer that we should be kinder to ourselves. also i wanted to have them actually fuck but it didn't seem right to fit that in here so ,,, part 2 question mark who is to say. anyways my inbox is always open for any thoughts, comments, questions, musings all of it! love y'all mwah

summary: you freak out when spencer walks in on you accidentally, and he just loves you too much to let it go

cw: smut 18+ minors dni, fingering, masturbation (r, just mentions), heavy petting/kissing, comfort, talks of intimacy issues, self-deprecating reader

wc: 3k

“Oh, sweet girl.”

Three words, maybe two and one syllable, that in any other instance would have had you melting into a puddle at the softness it reared. Words that have so easily turned you into a preening cat but are now aimed at you, albeit no judgement from his end, with no room for escape.

Spencer had come home after a long day of paperwork when he first heard it. He would have brushed it off if it didn’t happen again moments later, and louder. Concerned, he walks toward the bedroom, a flush rushing to his face as he comes to recognize what it is. A small crack of the door allowed him the glorious sight of you in the center of the bed, hand between your legs, eyes shut in ecstasy. You’re mesmerizing to him and he really can’t bring himself to look away, and he doesn’t notice himself subconsciously leaning on the door causing a faint creak that alarmed you to his presence. In that moment, however, he’s less worried about scaring you, and more about the overwashing look of shame on your face.

The soft creak of the door pulled you out of your daze, screaming when you saw the figure behind the door. Your eyes are bulging out of their sockets nearly, heartbeat still racing with adrenaline from when you haphazardly threw the blanket over yourself. You were conflicted, but getting caught doing something that is a common and completely normal instance in relationships really shouldn’t make you feel this guilty. Although you do know the guilt was created by a previous version of you where you had told Spencer that you wanted to take the pace of your relationship slowly, and had little to no desire to engage in such activities for the time being. Or so you said.

He cautiously steps closer, careful not to startle you further, “I’m not upset, or anything.”

You’re not upset either, you’re mortified. “I lied to you.”

“You did…but I don’t think you meant to, right?”

There had been a time where you were tangled all up in him, and poor Spencer, his hands were in the wrong place at the wrong time to no fault of his own and entirely yours, and your shutdown was unavoidable. The blood in your veins seized up like crystallizing water turning into ice, paralyzing both the physical and mental before you could realize.

Intimacy for you was a complicated concept. While it wasn’t novel or unwanted, physical intimacy was something you struggled to accept with open arms. Call it a consequence of your self perception, but it was hard to accept the soft touch of love when you felt like you didn’t deserve it. Spencer never minded, although his heart ached to make you see yourself the way he saw you, he was always more than willing to meet you where you were.

It almost pains you with how understanding Spencer was of the whole situation because you knew any other person would be deeply upset. Every other person was upset.

Spencer never was just any other person, you suppose.

“I don’t know how to explain this.” Another lie, you could easily explain the reason.

It’s not that you weren’t ready, it’s that you didn’t feel like you looked ready. The thought of subjecting Spencer to the one dark cornerstone of your being in the early days of being together seemed illogical and burdensome, and so it was more simple to play it off as wanting to take a slow pace.

But, as biology would see it you have needs and your boyfriend just happens to be so detrimentally attractive that the simplest act has been sending you into a hot fit as of late. The culprit this time was an innocent mirror picture of him at the store trying on new trousers. You had no chance.

You had found that your intimacy issues lie within extending it to others, and less with yourself. The solution of you finding release on your own quickly became a habit when you realized there was no fear on your own. There’s no one to let down if you’re alone.

Spencer perches at the foot of the bed, flat hand outstretched on the blanket towards you but keeping a comfortable distance, “You don’t have to explain anything, honey.”

“No I know, but—fuck—I should.” you bury your face, choosing to only speak to him from behind your hands for now, maybe forever.

He takes a moment to take inventory of your physical being—you don’t look in pain. Clearly you didn’t sound in pain. Your face is flushed, and though he’s sitting a little far from you, the heat radiating from your body hits him like a space heater.

“Sweetheart…I’m not upset.” he repeats, in hopes a reminder might provide reassurance.

It doesn’t. “You’re never upset at me, it’s concerning.” you mumble.

“You make it kind of hard to be upset at you, ever really.” Spencer braves and lays a hand on your leg.

You take a deep breath, the cold of his hand grounding you more and more. Spencer senses the calm it’s bringing you and rubs circles into your calf.

“Can you tell me what you’re feeling?” he asks gently.

What are you even feeling? You ponder for a moment—anxious, nervous, bad.

“Embarrassed.”

“Honey, there’s nothing embarrassing about masturbating. In fact, it’s more than healthy to do it to keep cortisol levels low,” he explains, “I just don’t know why you didn’t…want to tell me.”

The guilt swirls in your gut, hearing the twinge of hurt buried beneath the comfort he’s laid out for you. He just wants to help you, but you won’t let him in and that hurts him more.

“It’s more complicated than that.”

“How so?”

“It’s just…I…Look it’s…You’re just so hot—“ you slip out, clamping your hand over your mouth before leaking any more intrusive thoughts.

A faint smirk ghosts his face, “I’m…hot?”

“No—Well, yes. I just…ugh.”

“Okay, okay calm down,” he scoots closer and gently brings the hands covering your eyes to rest in your lap, “You don’t need to be all secretive, you know I’d never judge you.”

“I know,”

“I just thought you wanted to wait.”

“I do.”

“But, not with me? It’s okay if it's not with me.”

“Spence, I do. It’s not that.”

“Am I missing something?”

You gulp, “I just…it’s a personal problem. With me. Not you.”

His brows furrow, “Like what, baby? Do you need to see a doctor?”

“Yeah, if a doctor can fix my shoddy self esteem and make me like myself again.” you chuckle.

He doesn’t laugh. 

The pause he takes seems to be ages long before he speaks again, “Angel, how long have you been feeling like that?”

You’ve been caught red-handed, water filling up the tank faster than you can tread, “It’s nothing, I was just joking.”

“Hey,” he says with a rare firmness, “How. Long?”

You deflate under his hard gaze, “A…while…long enough… for it to feel like a…like a default setting, I guess.” you trail off.

Spencer couldn’t hide the hurt on his face if he tried. Not hurt from your lack of admission, hurt that you had felt like this for so long, dealt with this for so long on your own, and he didn’t even know.

All he ever hoped and wanted was for you to be happy, and if he could be the source of that he would ask for nothing more in life. So to hear about you struggling with this, that you felt like you had to keep it to yourself, was heartbreaking.

Spencer remains in his head a little too long as he’s broken out of it by your small voice, “Are you sure you’re not mad?”

He sighs and moves to sit next to you, making sure he stays above the blanket for your comfort. His back is against the headboard of the bed, and he raises his arm a little, gesturing for you to fill the you shaped crevice. You hesitantly move into the space, hating how you feel every move you’re making is calculated, but all of that goes away the second your head meets his chest and his hand comes up to comb through your hair, the other smoothing your arm down, and all you’re left with is him.

“I promise I’m not mad,” he whispers softly, “Just wish you told me. I would have helped you.” He’s intentional in his wording—would, and not could. Could implies he has a choice, a want to do or not do something. I could have helped you, or I could have not helped you. Would is finite, he is doing it because it is programmed in him that caring for you is a need. I would have helped you because it is the only thing I know to be certifiably true, that you deserve to be cared for.

“It sounds stupid out loud but I was afraid you wouldn’t like me the same if you saw me like…that. It seemed logical for me to remove that option altogether.”

His heart aches painfully, and he wishes he could take everyone who’s made you feel that way to target practice. “You are the most beautiful girl in the world. I would spend every day of my life proving that to you.” he utters with unequivocal resolve.

You sigh out shakily, “You’re too kind to me.”

“I’m always kind to you. You deserve kindness. You deserve a lot of things actually…” he trails off.

“Like what?” you ask.

“Well, did you um—” he trails. You look at him quizzically, he continues, “Like before I came in did you…finish?”

Oh. “Oh. I…I don’t think I did, actually. It’s okay though, no big deal.”

He stares at you intently, “Do you want to?”

Your eyes widen, “Spence oh, no it’s okay really you don’t have to do that.  

“You’re encouraged to say no if you feel even an ounce of doubt, but I’m offering because I love you and I want to show you that you can feel safe with me, even when you feel otherwise.”

The familiar sting returns to your eyes as the tears pool up. You’re not used to anyone putting this much effort and concern for your comfort, it’s a novel feeling but if Spencer is willing to handle you with as much care as he is, you’re ready to welcome that sentiment in with open arms.

“Yeah, yes.” you waver.

He grins and leans down, gingerly pressing his lips to yours. His hand ghosts from your calf to your knee, testing the water before moving more intent. An unwelcome yet familiar onset slowly rises, trying to break through to you, “Wait—“

He retracts his hand immediately, “You okay? We can stop if you need to.”

You shake your head. “No, no I’m fine. I just need a second.” you breath out, trying to self regulate. 

He pulls back his hand but you stop him, “No keep it there, it helps. I just…” You don’t know how to phrase it. You think it’s because you’re not in control. When you’re alone it’s only you at the helm calling the shots. But when it really comes down to it, the lack of control is nothing compared to the lack of predictability that comes with the former. Explaining that out loud was daunting to even think about.

Yet Spencer understands what you need, because he always knows what you need. His hand returns to your knee, giving it a soft squeeze, “You tell me to stop whenever you need to.”

He continues kissing you while smoothing his hand up your leg, making wide and sweeping motions across the plush of your thigh so you can feel where he is and where his hand is going. The gesture is comforting and makes you feel grounded, but your head is in a dreamy haze at how good Spencer’s hands feel on you.

The haze leaves through your lips as Spencer feels you sigh against him, feeling you relax more and more as the seconds go by. His hand reaches your upper thigh, fingers ghosting on the inside. “Is this okay?”

You nod, feeling your nerves idling like a distant wave in the ocean. But Spencer’s presence is a lighthouse shining through the fog and guiding you to his shores while the calm washes over you.

His fingers lightly trace the fabric of your panties, ones that you had slid back up your hips upon his entrance into the room. The motion causes you to jump and he pulls back to gauge your reaction. When he sees no fear in your eyes, more so stunned by your wide eyed gaze, his fingers move with more precision, adding more pressure to your clothed core.

A gentle gasp leaves you as he strokes up and down your slit. You’ve given up on continuing to kiss him, the feeling of his hands being too overwhelming to have both sensations at the same time. You tuck your head into the crook of his neck, your body involuntarily curving towards him as he draws symbols on you with his index. Your breathing gets heavier and faster the longer he goes, and soon small moans begin to escape you.

He drags his finger to the top of your panties and toys with the band, faintly asking, “You still with me, sweet girl?” You preen into the crevice of his neck as he keeps talking, “Want me to keep going?” 

He feels you nodding into him as you breathlessly whisper, “Please.”

His finger dips below the fabric and travels down to your entrance, gathering the slickness and spreading it all over you. “Fuck,” he curses softly, “Look how wet you are, baby.”

You whimper at his words and Spencer ascends to the heavens if there even is one, and if there is it’s the one where you sound like that for him. He circles back up to your clit, paying special attention to the bundle of nerves before sliding back your slit and repeating the whole sequence a few more times.

Your moans are coming out at a steady pace, and he’s been prodding around your entrance for some time now, teasing and edging you closer. “Gonna put a finger in now, okay? Doing so good for me, baby.” he murmurs.

The feeling of his finger entering you is satiating. But it’s not enough, and you need more. “Spence,” you manage to get out, “Can take another one, please.” His eyes shut tight as he revels in your desperation for him, and how cynical he must be to love having you at his mercy this much. He would confess the darkest of sins if you asked him in that tone, and he has no choice but to oblige. He stifles a groan at how easily the second finger slid in, his other hand moving up to play with your hair and cradle your head close to his chest as he works his ministrations.

The familar coil builds in your gut, but at an intensity you’ve never felt before. His fingers move in and out of you urgently, his thumb returning to your clit. He’s a man determined to get you there, and your moans and cries of his name only spur him on further. After a few minutes your moans and cries turn into whines and babbles, and he knows you’re close.

His head leans down to croon in your ear, “Shh, it’s okay. I got you, sweet girl. You can come, ‘m right here.”

It’s enough to push you over the edge and you come harder than you ever have on your own, the waves of your climax overtaking you completely. Spencer continues to pump his fingers through your orgasm, talking you the whole way down. Mutters of praises and kisses flow through your subconscious as the euphoria high takes its peak and you come back down to this realm.

His hand smoothes your hair back as you continue to pant against his chest, words unable to find you.

“You okay?”

You finally catch your breath, “That was—fuck—the most insane orgasm I have ever had.”

Spencer beams at this. For one, his obvious and impressive skills that have stunned you into oblivion. And two, because you look so relaxed. The stark difference of your anxiety filled face from when he first came into the room to the blissed out daze you have right now makes his heart swell five sizes up.

He hugs you closer and whispers, “I’m so proud of you, angel. Thank you for trusting me.”

Sleep is fighting you hard as you laugh airily and tuck yourself under his arm again, “I don’t know why I thought that would be scarier.”

He sighs, his smile faltering but still fond, “Past experiences and self perception complicate the anxiety around sex and intimacy. It’s a natural response based on your lived experiences.”

“Oh.” you mutter, slight deject in your tone.

“But we can work on it, if you want.” he adds, “It’s all up to you with what you’re comfortable with and how you want to do it. If you’ll allow me, I’d love to help you in any way I can, angel.”

You really don’t know how you got so lucky. Someone so kind, and patient, and willing to be with you as you navigate these things you normally would have kept to yourself. You feel grateful to be able to bare a piece of yourself to him, and know that he would receive it with open arms, wrapping it up and handling it with as much care as he can bear.

You cuddle closer, and mumble before your eyes succumb to sleep, “Love you. So much.”

Spencer looks down maybe two seconds later and you’re already out like a light. He chuckles softly to himself and whispers, “I love you more than you’ll ever know, sweet girl. Good night.”